#wtf how fast can some of you type?

[kellygreeny]

MAYDAY! We've got an snow planet!

[genspiel]

.....................well now i'm just thinking about how echo and noise could've provided a really interesting exploration of mental illness and trauma and stigmatization but canon kinda missed the mark on that one huh

[feyburner]

This is part of a longer thing I may post on ao3 at some point but here’s some silly little Jaytim texting AU. I use this format as a writing warmup.

EDIT: This has been posted on AO3.

[Unknown] »

Hey. This is Jason. 

I have a favor to ask. You can say no.

« tim

uh

1. i’m aware of how favors work  

2. what is it?

« tim

?

« tim

hey are you like. good

J »

Yeah fine 

Sry. Rethinking this maybe

« tim

what, do you need a kidney or something?

i can’t give you a kidney.

i don’t have any organs to spare.

J »

What ? 

« tim

what’s the favor?

J »

I wouldn’t ask if it wasnt important

I’d ask Roy but hes in star city 

or Kori but shes off world

I tried dickhead but hes in haven. Cant get away tonight

« tim

yeah jason i get it lol

J »

So Im currently in the cargo hold of a private yacht

« tim

what >?

J »

We’re caught in the storm thats hitting the city its a whole thing. 

« tim

are you in the cargo hold of your own volition or did someone put you there

J »

So I dont think I can get back t

No its on purpose

« tim

hang on. you’re in gotham bay right now? in a boat?  

jason this storm is really bad.

it’s already sunk a houseboat and a fishing boat at the marina

J »

I dont think I can get back totown toni

Christ you type fast 

Shut up for a sec. Clam down

Clam*

*Calm fuck me

Thought I was gnna be back tonight but bc of storm its not looking great.

Can you feed my sourdough starter 

« tim

what

J »

4511 overhill apt 6D 

Key under the neighbors mat. 6H

« tim

hey to clarify. “its not looking great” ← what does that mean

J »

Starter is on counter. in glass jar 

Should just need one feeindg. Maybe 2. depending 

« tim

on???

J »

On wwhen I get back?

« tim

so you do plan on coming back

J »

Yeah timothy I’m in a boat not the heart of Mount Doom

« tim

yeah? vaders not there? so that means everything’s fine? 

J »

Did you

jst say Vader

As in Darth

« tim

??? 

J »

Oh my god

« tim

jason are you in peril or what.

J »

No im not in “peril” lol.

Did you see the thing I said about my sourddough starter

It needs to be fed

« tim

wtf is a sourdough starter

nvm i googled it

J »

Its a live bacteria colony you use to m 

Oh ok

Yeah so it just needs 50g lukewarm water + 50g flour

Theres a scale next to the jar

Stir until it looks like hummus

Put lid back on

The end

« tim

the internet says if you put it in the fridge it doesn’t need daily feedings

J »

Sure. But that would mess up my bread schedule

« tim

your bread schedule 

J »

Man are gyou gonna fuckin feed Breadie Mercury or should I find someone else

« tim

im already en route. 

J »

Oh

Ok

Thank you.

Wtf dont text and motorbike  

« tim

how about you dont text and Sinking Boat

J »

Hey its not like I’m gonna cause a boat crash

« tim

i was stopped at a red light 😐

anwyay i’m at your place.

1. why do you not have a security system. when you said key under the neighbor’s mat i thought you were joking. 

2. how warm is lukewarm

J »

1. I’m the security system

« tim

just rolled my eyes so hard it actually physically hurt

J »

God youre annoying

2. ? Its lukewarm

« tim

ohhhhh thanks! that’s so helpful :) here i am trying not to murder your incredibly important bacteria colony that i just drove across town for but no thats great jason very descriptive thanks :) 

J »

Like warm but not too wram, nothing you’d want to take a bath in

Can you fucking

I TYPE SLOW.

« tim

ok.

[Image Attached]

he is fed

J »

Thanks man.

Sincerely.

« tim

so hows the cargo hold going

still intact i assume? 

J »

Mostly ya

« tim

pardon? 

J »

Slight leakage. Nothing major

« tim

oh? are you a boatologist now? 

i dont think you’re qualified to judge that?

J »

Moving right past “boatologist” out of the goodness of my heart.

Chill lol. If it was rly bad thered probably be some sort of alar

Hm.

« tim

did an alarm just start going off

J »

Dont worry about it

« tim

im not. 

did it though

also which yacht? im in the marinas scheduling dtabase

blue miracle, serendipity, carp-e diem? which one

« tim

jason?

« tim

if this is a joke it’s not funny

oh cool you’re not on comms either. great.

hey if youre dead again and i just fed your stupid starter for nothing im gonna be soooo mad just fyi

« tim

ugh.

*

J »

Hey

Thanks again for the

I’m not gonna say “save” bc I was doinf just fine on my own.

But thanks for the backup.

Lmk when youre home

Nope sorry lol you dont have to do that.

Night.

« tim

home

J »

Also I just saw your messaages from

Ah. 👍

From earlier. 

« tim

you mean from when you said “huh, this boat seems to be filling with water” and then disappeared? those messages? 

J »

Those were not my exact words.

« tim

right. your exact words contained somehow even less information 

J »

Shut up

I just wanted to 

You know. Youre the only one who jokes about it

The only one in the family I mean

your family, I mean

The bats.

« tim

? 

the only one who jokes about what

J »

Me being dead

« tim

oh. 

ok. well

its not like. actually funny to me. i was just annoyed. sorry i guess

J »

No thats not 

Tim. Shut up.

I dont mind. I like that one of you does. 

Its better than people talking around it. Like its this big shameful thing I did.

One of many

If I mention it in front of dickhead he does the face

the :~{ face

« tim

wow its uncanny

uh. for the record. 

i don’t think that’s the reason people talk around it

if im correct in thinking that by “people” you mean “one specific person whose name rhymes with Rat Can” 

 

J »

Yeah well

I just

Christ never mind. Im sorry. You are not the person to be sayign this to.

Im gonna shut the fuck up I think. 

Goodnight.

« tim

oh what, you can’t talk to me about being dead bc of that one time you tried to kill me? 

and failed btw :/ 

J »

Tim

Not to be so unchill

But you know how me being dead isnt actaully funny to you

« tim

…got it. sorry

J »

No. don’t apologize to me

Ever

I’m serious 

« tim

like for anything? 

what if i killed breadie mercury 

J »

You didnt. He is thriving

« tim

he is?

wait. really?

you can tell?

J »

[Image Attached]

Hes doubled in size since you fed him.

« tim

whoa

J »

Yup. Thanks again for thattoo.

*that too

Its stupid but hes kinda my son.

« tim

wouldn’t he technically be like, 10 billion sons

J »

He is my 10 billion sons.

« tim

lolol

wow. why am i so pleased hes thriving lol 

J »

Right

« tim

jeez

i was so worried about the water temp

google said lukewarm is 98-105 so i did 98 to be safe

J »

You used a thermometer? 

« tim

your instructions were vague!

i didnt want to kill your bacteria colony!

J »

Thanks Tim.

« tim

? you already said that lol

i gotta pass out btw

glad you didnt die: the sequel in a yacht

that would have been so cringe

night jason

J »

Night

*

J »

You up?

« tim

obviously

why

J »

Could use your eyes on something.

[Image Attached]

« tim

morse code but the dots and dashes are reversed and its spelling backwards in russian, ASTITP AYALEB AVD RTSIRP → PRISTR DVA BELAYA PTITSA → PIER TWO WHITE BIRD

J »

Bc it looks like morse but its not, its kind of scrambl 

Ok jesus christ . 

30 seconds? Seriously? Fuck me

Can I hire you? Jesus lol

« tim

that depends. do you pay more than batman?

J »

The fuck? Does he pay you guys now?

« tim

no.

J »

Then yes. I do pay more than batman.

« tim

how much more

J »

One coffee per codebreak? 

« tim

:\

J »

Two coffees per codebreak

Two and a loaf of sourdough

« tim

sourdough from breadie mercury?

J »

Ya

« tim

done

J »

Damn. I feel like you should have higher standards

« tim

i mean i was already gonna do it for free

now i have successfully negotiated coffee & sustenance 

im on a roll. nothing but Ws 

J »

Ws?

« tim

its young people slang you wouldn’t get it ❤️

J »

I am barely 3 years older htan you.

It could be argued, considering certain events, that we’re basically the same age.

« tim

and yet you text like an old, old man

J »

I do not

Would you rather I texted like “idk brb lmao roflcopter”

« tim

ROFLCOPTER?

oh my god. ohhhhhh jason. oh my god

that is absolutely not what the kids are saying these days. oh my god

J »

Ok you know what. At least I know Mount Doom isnt a Star Wars thing

« tim

? 

oh, is it star trek? 

J »

I’m 99% sure youre antagonizing me on purpose

But have you seriously not read or watched Lord of the Rings

« tim

no i have not.

J »

Hm.

« tim

what

J »

Nothing.

« tim

……….what

*

« tim

did you NARC on me

to BRUCE

about LORD OF THE RINGS?????

J »

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

« tim

WHY DO I NOW HAVE 3 SEPARATE SUNDAY AFTERNOON “HOUSE MEETINGS” BLOCKED OFF IN MY CALENDAR, JASON? 

WHY ARE THEY EACH 4 HOURS LONG?

WHY ARE THEY LABELED “CULTURAL EDUCATION (MANDATORY)”? 

J »

I can’t pretend to know what goes on in B’s mind.

That said, I have reason to believe he and Alfred take lotr pretty seriously.

« tim

its a TWELVE HOUR MOVIE

about GOBLINS

J »

I’m not gonna respond to that bc I know youre just lashing out.

« tim

if youve sentenced me to 12 hours of a movie i hate i’m gonna hack everything you own. 

im gonna mass text the entire cape wearers community the footage of that time condiment king kicked your ass so bad he felt guilty and offered to personally help you out of the mustard pool 

J »

What the fuck

How do you fuckig know about ?????? that???????? 

Not that ithahpened 

What hefuckk ??

« tim

ooooooooo you better hope i love these goblins!

J »

Why are you?? evil??

« tim

you should have killed me when you had the chance!!

sorry.

J »

Its ok. That one was pretty funny tbh.

Oh hm shouldnt have laughed just then. Bad timing on my part

Brb

« tim

uh

« tim

ok…….. getting reports of a “disturbance” at pier two…….. 

« tim

sorry were you texting me *mid-standoff* with the russian mafia

« tim

ugh.

*

« tim

you know tracking your location would be so much easier if i didn’t have to hack into your comm sys every time

luckily your encryption is garbage but still. its 2 minutes of my life i wont get back.

J »

Not sure I recall giving you permission to track my location?

« tim

oh i’m sorry. next time i will simply leave you to go down with a texas oil magnate’s incredibly tacky yacht, or get swiss cheesified by mobsters 

J »

Hey I wrapped up the russians myself 

« tim

yeah? 

J »

…

Yeah….

« tim

so you thought the 12-minute universal signal jam was the act of a benevolent god? 

J »

:-|

« tim

im just saying it would be significantly more efficient if you agreed to a tracker

just one little tracker. you wouldn’t even notice it’s there.

think of all the time and energy you’d save me

J »

I feel the need to point out that you don’t have to repeatedly hack my comms system.

« tim

i mean it’s that or monitor sightings on the gocitizen app

i have an algo that texts relevant pings to me, which is super helpful for when i want an inbox full of random people talking about how hot you are. less helpful for literally every other circumstance 

J »

Uh

What

« tim

how hot *red hood is. to clarify

in their opinion

the people’s opinion

J »

?

« tim

the people of gotham city

J »

The people of Gotham city do not think Red Hood is hot lol

« tim

wait 

i cant tell if you’re being serious

J »

Uh? Yeah Im being serious? Lol tf

Why would they think hes hot 

They dont think Batman is hot 

« tim

o…kay…

huh.

how to… hmm

J »

Like nightwing sure

And the girls. Bc of objectification of women

« tim

oh wow

J »

Red Robin. If i had to guess

But when people see Hood its definitely not… that kind of response lol

« tim

what kind of response, exactly

J »

You know like saying “Hey Hood youre hot” 

« tim

oh, wow. 

okay. ummm

hmm. one sec.

J »

?

« tim

check your email 

J »

Ok…? 

J »

Oh my fucking god.

« tim

yeah

J »

Oh my god?

« tim

yeah

J »

This document is fucking 45 pages long?

« tim

its everything from the past 30 days yeah

J »

The past

Whaht the fuck

Ok some of these people definitely got hit by Poison Ivy.

This is . Tim wtf. I havent even heard of some of this stuff. 

« tim

oof are you on page 14

J »

Im on page 3???

« tim

oh my god

J »

What the fuck

Please please tell me its not like this for Batman too

Tim

« tim

its not like this for batman :)

J »

Ok. Jesus. I would genuinely have to move cities.

« tim

its worse :)

J »

Oh what the fuck

Oh my fucking god page 14.

You get this shit TEXTED to you?????

Ohm ygod. You read this?????

« tim

i mean

no

i glance at it

for security purposes.

i dont like, read it read it

anyway did you seriously not know? haha

J »

No??? Again its not like people tell me

« tim

yeah but

like

theres a certain level of objectivity involved, here

yknow

sorry im trying to find a non awkward way to be like “have you looked in a mirror lately” 

« tim

sorry

that was in fact awkward!

nvm

just let me know if you’d be ok with the tracker. its fine if not

i was mostly joking about the hacking

J (From Work) »

No you weren’t.

« tim

no i wasnt

i dont mind though. its like a brain teaser

anyway im going dark for patrol, later

*

J (From Work) »

[Screenshot Attached]

[Screenshot Attached]

[Screenshot Attached]

[Screenshot Attached]

[Screenshot Attached]

Question. why is the average Gotham citizen a raging horndog 

« tim

oh my god

you know i can tell you searched “red robin hot” right

J (From Work) »

Figured it was only fair

[Screenshot Attached]

This persons got some mad zoom lens skills

I’d think it was you, if it wasnt, yknow, you

« tim

wow. that is certainly a photo of my ass

…a stellar photo of my ass. wow. 

do you have a direct link? i gotta send this to steph

J (From Work) »

goctz.app/user/3824973/post/29348230df3

Haha

I kinda thought you and blondie broke up

back on again?

« tim

no lol we are very much just friends

she has a thing going with someone who shall remain nameless but suffice to say it’s Going

anyway we just send each other gocitizen vigilante ass shots 

its a whole genre

they’re like trading cards

J (From Work) »

Guess everyone’s got a hobby?

« tim

the only rule is no nightwing

J (From Work) »

Do I want to know why

« tim

he accounts for a frankly overwhelming percentage of vigilante ass shots

so its too easy

you’d THINK we’d have a no-batman rule, because ew, but due to the cape and his sixth sense for cameras pointed at him, a qualifying shot is actually extremely rare. 

← only guy who ever managed to take quality photos of batman 

anyway, we put it to a vote. i lost.

J (From Work) »

A vote between you and Steph? 

You lost a 50/50 vote?

« tim

i dont wanna talk about it.

J (From Work) »

Right. 

So what I’m getting from this is you have Red Hood ass shots in your phone.

« tim

no

J (From Work) »

No?

« tim

well

J (From Work) »

Yeah?

« tim

we don’t like, save them

that would be weird

we just notify each other. professionally, as colleagues 

and keep an ongoing points tally

thats all

so i do not currently have photos of your ass in my phone. thank you

J (From Work) »

How many points is my ass worth

« tim

i hate everything about this conversation

J (From Work) »

Its 100% your own fault, answer the question

« tim

if you must know. 

points are awarded based on a series of objective scoring criteria.

J (From Work) »

Uh huh. Like what

« tim

technical excellence

composition. lighting and color balance. 

dynamism 

J (From Work) »

Dynamism…

« tim

creativity

umm

emotional impact

and 

subject matter

J (From Work) »

I see.

« tim

ok i know it sounds bad

J (From Work) »

It sounds fucking hysterical Im near tears 

« tim

but if you think abou

oh

okay, well, great

J (From Work) »

I’ll let you know if I stumble on any more. 

Or is that cheating

« tim

its totally cheating

please do

J (From Work) »

You got it red. 👍

« tim

:)

[astrologylunadream]

What Type of Lover Would They Be? 💌🍓🖤 (Pick a card/Tarot love reading)

Hi it's Lunadream❤️ This is a reading on your person and the type of lover they are/would be like with you!👀💋 hope you find your message🌸

Notice: Only take what resonates because the most important thing is your own judgement!♡ If anything doesn't resonate, don't worry! It's not your message right now <3 (Entertainment purpose only. All rights reserved)

Now, shall we begin~? ^w^ Think of the your person, and pick whichever pile that fits the energy you're feeling~🌸❤️

Pile 1🍫

Pile 2🥛

Pile 3🥀

Pile 4🍓

Take your time and choose carefully with the heart~♡

On to the readings —> 💌

Pile 1🍫

Sign energy: Unexpected, Activity, Soft spot, Energy, Hold, Lilith, Chiron, Libra, Gemini, 1st house, Vertex,🎶💃👿🤵‍♂️

👤Your person's energy: Oh my pile 1 your person is fiesty😂😂 There is a lot of passion and energy to this pile, I know this is about your person but I am also getting some fire energy from you guys🙈🔥 Some of you could be aries, leo or sagittarius placements in your charts, my pile 1's are so irresistible!!🥰 Now this person has a lot energy physically, I feel like they can do a lot without getting burnt out, probably can work out often. On their own this person can be forward and a little impulsive but they also have a very gentle side.🥹🩷 This person tends to be direct in their thinking, for some lf you this person curses a lot😂🤬 Physically they have a certain charm about them, because they can look mean yet soft and sweet at the same time?? It just kinda comes off as hot tbh😂😭 Oh and prominent signs in their chart are Libra, Gemini, and Aries. They have a mars mercury feel to them, they could talk fast or bluntly. They do have an unexpected dark side to them, maybe they have a soft image but then they're a devil in disguise omg😈 Nothing bad but, they have another vibe to them that's really passionate and aggressive even?? Maybe they have a bit of a resting b*tch face but you think it's so cute😆 Oh hold on I'm just getting something, you guys may see this person as the love of your life, you're soft for them🥺💞💋 Other people may think they're bad news but in your eyes they're literally the sweetest thing ever.🤭🌸 This connection could be on hold for some of you, there is some sort of barrier between physical touch with this person right now for some sudden reason. Maybe someone is into healing music? Music could be healing for this person. You like the way this person thinks, they're like a cute little devil to you.😂 They may look really adorable to you when they're angry, some of my pile 1's want to marry this person💍💕 They could be toned/strong physically, random but their hand grip is very strong? Like they can open a jar or crush things with their hand?😂🫣 You may be able to spot them easily by their hands. Honestly this is just so cute🥰

🌹What type of lover they are with you: Target, Winter, Remedy, Listen, Unafraid, 11th house, Sun, 3rd house, Sagittarius, Saturn,🎱🩲🤬🫐 Lol wtf are these emojis help- Umm so your person would be the type of lover that's like a best friend, they might would want to be friends first before getting into the relationship with you.🙃 Despite their forward approach to communication, when it comes to you they would be the BEST listener omg this is so sweet😭💖 Like they would be all ears for whatever you have to say💬 it's just so cute because it really felt like they're the type to cut people off easily when they talk and not take time to listen but PILE 1 when it comes to you they will never interrupt you🥺💕💞 They are naturally a very fun type of lover with you, they would be brave and daring in their attempts to win you over😆 Like they are not afraid to make any bold moves or mistakes.💪😎 In a relationship with you, they are like the shining sun keeping you warm in the cold winter. They may try to befriend your friends, and talk about how lucky they are to have you🤭 Your person would be giving sibling, best friend and lover energy all at once. But as childish and bright as they may act with you, they are also a very dominant type.😳❤️‍🔥⛓️ So like one minute they're joking with you and then the next they're choking with you (if you know what I mean!!🥵) Yeah also they're the kind of lover that's very handsy in a relationship with you, they may always wanna have their hand on your shoulder or other places😭 They might be a little reckless around you, simply because they get all bright and excited when they're with you🥹💖 But they are also the kind to take you seriously when needed, like they would really commit🫶 They may be the kind to tell dirty jokes with you, just throwing it out there to get your reply🫣 So basically they can be really fun and silly but also hot af with you😭⁉️ I see them smirking all the time and nudging you, as your lover they would get very intense when you two are alone❤️‍🔥⛓️ Also they may love arguing with you then suddenly making out with you??😳 AHH Yeah I can definitely see that for your person, they're the sweet and funny type but can be dominant and aggressive with you if you want it😈😰😭

💌Messages from your person: What happened? Let's take our time, I wish I could control it, Someone will love you, It's all real (Omg yess pile 1 it's reaaal🥰) Extra cards: Spell, Mean, Submissive, Mutable, Skill (Some of you may be mutable signs, Pisces, Virgo, Gemini, Sagittarius✨️ I love this connection you two have it's really something special🌹)

Haha this pile was A LOT omg!!😂🩷 Thank you my pile 1's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!🥰❤️

I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 1 with the chocolate emoji~🍫 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading🌸🌹💌

Pile 2🥛

Sign energy: Tea, Twin flame, Imagination, Darling, Rebellion, 3rd house, Vertex, 5th house, 9th house, 11th house,🤗🪸🥠🫧

👤Your person's energy: Ah they're very attractive aren't they?? Some of my pile 2's have a lot of fantasies about this person🥺💭 This may be a twin flame/soulmate connection to you, they feel like your soul twin🩷 You may interact with this person through social media/online, I am getting lots of mirrored energy. Prominent Gemini, Leo, Sagittarius, and Aquarius in their chart.✨️ I feel like this person makes you very happy, you just want to hug them😢💖 I am getting water energy from some of my pile 2's, especially neptune placements.🔱💕 This connection feels fateful to you guys, maybe you've even been manifesting this person?🙏 Tea may be significant, also for some of you this person could be from a different culture or background than you. They could also have a thirst for traveling to other countries.✈️ Maybe their beliefs are a bit rebellious? They desire to befriend people of different countries and ethnicities. They have a charming bright aura and smile made of sunshine, also you are friends with this person or want to be!!🥺🩷 This person may have a unique way of speaking or communicating with others, some people may find it strange but you find is intriguing.💬✨️ For physical appearance, maybe unique hair. They are giving an eccentric and creative vibe, they may be into unusual music or art. They have strange tastes for some of you, a lot of manifestation from this pile. If you're manifesting this person just know it's working!!🥰 The fortune cookie emoji is very promising, there is the working of fate for this connection. Soulmate/twin flame vibes take what resonates~💞

🌹What type of lover they are with you: Daily, Situation, Inactivity, Benefits, Feminine, Aries, Earth, Chiron, Sagittarius, Air,🕸🧖‍♀️🦥🧊 Okay interesting so the first thing I'm noticing with your person is that they are the type of lover to do considerably feminine activities with you, like going shopping or pampering yourselves.💅🛍💖 They may be very helpful if you two ever trave to another country, maybe they speak a language well? And you can benefit from that with your person🤭💫 You may also have many travel benefits and opportunities when you're with them, as well as learning new things. I can see that your person is the type to go pretty fast into the relationship with you, they might just start dating you kind of out of nowhere that's the vibe I'm getting from your person lol😂 They may try to take really good care of themselves, wear expensive clothes and look good just for you✨️💗🥺 There is this energy, like they may be really worried about having a relationship come to a stop or just die so like they try to do as much as they can to keep you interested every day😭 They are a bit clingy, so they are the type to have their arm around you a lot.👀💕 Some of my pile 2's this is a very feminine person when in a relationship with you, they may act as the feminine in the relationship.♀️ I do see you two doing a lot of sweet activities together, self care is something you both share.💝🪞🧼 You two could get caught up in some petty fights sometimes, but then they just hug you and cuddle you making it hard to stay mad at them🥹🙊 I can see this person being protective of you. They may enjoy buying you products for you to use, like nice bathroom products✨️🧴 Wow it's like this person knows you so well because they are into similar things, also, they may like to touch your thighs a lot. I can see them wanting to grab your leg often when you two are dating.😭😨💞 For those who this is a masculine they have a lot of understanding and respect for you guys🥺 Like they are not afraid to seem less masculine by sharing the things you love, like if it's what pile 2 wants it doesn't matter to me <3 I'm just getting such soft and sweet masculine vibes for those, this could be a sort of relationship that just happens somehow. Like situationship kinda thing.🤯 For some of you this person may be a little jealous of you?? There is some competitive energy here. Ohh but you guys make such a cute couple, like a very feminine one.😘💞💅 I can just see you two buying cute clothes and spending time doing your favorite things together!!

💌Messages from your person: So what, I like the pain, Just say the word, I'm in trouble, Don't waste your time (For some of you this person feels like a situation won't work out, they may be having negative thoughts about this connection😢 It could be a sort of masochistic view on the relationship, like they want things to go wrong for their suffering. This person may have a lot of emotional wounds, also they could feel they aren't good enough for you like "just give up on me" kinda thing🥺💔) Extra cards: Protection, True, Indecision, Slow, Trial and error (Ohh but it's true that they wanna protect and heal you guys, but they're just really confused, like they feel so slow and can't make up their mind right now!!😫💗)

Wow I didn't expect all that🤯 Thank you my pile 2's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!🥰❤️

I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 2 with the milk emoji~🥛 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading🌸🌹💌

Pile 3🥀

Sign energy: North node, Learn, Locked, Good, Hard, Water, North node, 7th house, 2nd house, 1st house,🪃❤️😁🔗

👤Your person's energy: Ooh lovers energies in this pile!! OH MY this could be someone you are meant to be with💖 Signs for them are Libra, Taurus, Aries.. Venus placements! Oh also water signs. They could have a pretty voice, very clear and nice.🗣✨️ Some of my pile 3's will come in contact with this person soon, most likely a phsyical encounter soon!!🤗 This is a romantic option for you guys, you may consider this person to be the love of your life.💐 You feel very connected to this person, romantically this person may be committed to you in some way.💍🩷 This could be a twin flame/soulmate connection for some, there is a lot of love and attraction to this person.🥰 North node came out twice I just realized, so there could be a lot happening really soon or in the future with this person? Actually that's very promising, this is a very loving and sweet person.🥺💕 They could be a water rising, also may have soft skin. This could be someone who always comes back to you or always will, because they are linked to you in some way. It's like no matter what they will always be connected to you guys💗🔗😱 Definitely romantic feelings for this person, my pile 3's are in love with them omggg🥺 You could be dead set on marrying this person. Also you may be possessive over this person, like you want them to be yours only.💞 Ugh I can just feel so much love and need for this person, you guys are so soft for them😭 I also feel like some of my pile 3's are actually already in a relationship with this person, but not all. This person is very physically attractive, they could have venus on their rising too.🫢💋 People may consider them a good kisser? Lol dunno why that's coming through, they may have very kissable lips. Something about this person is heavy, they feel very grounded and calm. You may learn a lot from this person or the other way around they may learn a lot from you, I see a lot of growth in this person.🩷 Their physical appearance is coming through a lot, I feel like you guys just can't control yourselves around this person like you just wanna touch them so bad LMAO👐😭 Something is definitely going to happen soon with this person, lol there is just so much romantic energy thrown in my face with this one you guys love is written all over this person😂 You are also very excited about them, they make you all giddy and cute💗

🌹What type of lover they are with you: Lack, Risk, Rest, Emotional, Affection, 5th house, Eros, 3rd house, Pisces, 4th house,❤️‍🔥🪐🛎🕹 Ohhh pile 3 this gooood😍❤️ This person as a lover is passionate, romantic and caring. They will want to play and have fun with you, very teasing and charming🩷 The relationship is filled with love and attraction, they're the type to shower you with compliments and tell you how attractive you are to them🌹💖 They are very affectionate as your lover!! The type to embrace you lovingly and kiss you as much as you'd like🥺💋 They're such a flirt with you, but it's so genuine??😭 Like it literally comes from their heart and it just pours out of them how much they love you.❤️ Now this person may conceal these feelings or restrict themselves from affection towards you, they could feel it is immature or irresponsible to indulge in that as the please. (But they really want to😩) The beginning of the relationship might would start out very difficult for them to show their love, because they would be denying it. But as your lover this person would eventually let loose and give in to all the many desires they keep locked away because guess what, they can't control themselves with you🤪🙈❤️‍🔥 They are really a wild and passionate lover with you, so romantic it's crazy. The type to cuddle you tight and rest with you, taking naps with you aw🥺💞 But also they talk a lot with you, like they won't shut up or stop flirting with you😂 Persistent af. They also want to control you and have fun with you like you're their toy🥵 Also they enjoy teasing and playing all sorts of little games with you. They're the type to make you feel loved and comfortable then suddenly they pin you down and catch you by surprise😭🔞 I won't go into everything but they definitely are a very VERY passionate lover with you. Like they want to turn on a lot, very risky with you. But also emotionally attached to you, they are really sweet but also really naughty.😳❤️‍🔥 You guys are connected on a soul level, they get so hot with you oml. Oh my pile 3 they are really into you as a lover, also they're very entertaining and love your attention.👑 The dynamic you guys have is literally everything😭 They are a lover that would desire you, treat you so good, and spoil you. Warm hugs and hot kisses, also they would commit to you. Like they only see you omg, you are the object of their affections.😍❤️❤️❤️

💌Messages from your person: Anything please, I'll do, How do you think I feel? We're compatible, You make me nervous (Omg your person knows you two are like 🔥🔥🔥🔥 Also they're down for anything but also hella nervous about you🥺💞) Extra cards: Dominant, Catch, Orange, Fake smile, Tangled (Yeah they want to catch you and tie you up and much much more that I won't go into...!!!😭🔞)

This pile got crazy!! Thank you my pile 3's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!🥰❤️

I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 3 with the rose petals emoji~🥀 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading🌸🌹💌

Pile 4🍓

Sign energy: Demeanor, View, Sight, Deep, First date, 9th house, Pisces, 11th house, Water, Eros,🛸🥳🍋😎

👤Your person's energy: You guys may view this person from social media/online, a lot of my pile 4's are not present in this person's life, they could be at a distance right now.🥲 For some of you this is an online dating thing or you could be manifesting to date this person.🙏💗 They're really cool omg, they have a unique and exotic charm about them. They could be from overseas or abroad, or have traveled a lot.✈��✨️ Some of you keep a check on this person through divinity or spiritual sources. They are knowledgeable and kind, signs in their chart could be Sagittarius, Pisces, Aquarius, and water placements.🥰💫 You have a deep admiration for this person, you may look up to them. They have a vibe about them, really unlike any other.🩷 You may have dreams of this person or that is where you see them often. This feels like someone very far away, they feel like an alien on another planet to you. That is their energy.👽🤔 Perhaps you feel very different than this person in some ways, they are mentally very attractive.💭 Some of you could be friends with this person, or they just seem like they would make a good friend. They are creative and have good ideas, you support their imagination.💡💖 This person is very fun and bright, but I'm also getting this swag about them. Eccentric and hot??😂 They just have such a fresh vibe about them, also they could have a water sign as their 9th house. Some of you watch this person from a distance like online, you may look at their page often but remain unseen.🤫 They could be a bit of a rebel, like they dyed their hair or dress different than how they were told. Something about them is just different, and you really like that about them omg🥰

🌹What type of lover they are with you: More, Doctor, Uranus, Uniqueness, Hot, 5th house, Virgo, 1st house, Mercury, 6th house, 🔚🌇🗒🏍 Lol this person's gonna get handsy with you guys- OMG so they would treat you really special, unlike anyone else.🔥 They are the type to keep wanting more more more😭😭😭 They can't get enough of you as your lover, the attractive just grows. The way they talk to you as your lover is very different than how they usually talk, like it speeds up and things get really hot🤯❤️‍🔥 They think of you a lot, also I keep getting  freaky vibes so.. uh... you know what that means😳🙊 They may want to take care of you, and mantain a healthy lifestyle in a relationship with you.🥗🩷 But also when you two are together, they feel like they can finally be themselves😇 Like they can be as weird and nonconforming as they wanna be. They feel like you won't judge them, there is a lot of communication from this person as your lover. They will talk a lot with you, the kind to talk about all sorts of random things💬😂💖 In a relationship with you, this person is witty and entertaining. Like you will never get bored with their conversations🩷 They might overthink about you though, especially if they think of something they shouldnt😳👿 I can see them writing down every detail and quirk about you they love😇 They would find you so fascinating, because to them you would make them feel not so strange. Aw they would feel so accepted by you as your lover, you heal them really.🥺💞 They are the type to touch you a lot, this could be very often😳 They could like holding hands with you, also holding your waist. For some of you I can imagine you guys start dating online first, but only some.🤳🩷👀 Also they're the type of lover that loves taking selfies of you two together😍 Also just taking photos of you in general would be their favorite hobby~ Oh and uh... filiming whatever else they find interesting😳🔞 They are the kind to tell you "you're perfect" or "you look so hot" while you're just like eating chips and watching tv lmaooo also like when you're just talking about your playlist or something they just start making out with you at the most unexpected times HELP😂🥵 Like they wouldn't even give you a warning they are an unpredictable lover to say the least, but it's hot.❤️‍🔥

💌Messages from your person: I would hurt whoever hurts you, You can't control me, You can do it, I wanna steal your kiss, You know I love you (OHH pile 4 you better knowww🥵🥵🥵) Extra cards: Inspiration, King, Sugar, Unhealthy, Waist (They have some crazy fantasy about you guys oml🔞 Didn't I say they would wanna grab your waist? Well it's here oml that energy is raging that's all I'm gonna say😭)

Okayy that was fun!! thank you my pile 4's! If you feel this resonated, you may tap the heart to claim this message!🥰❤️

I hope you enjoyed your reading! ʚ(｡˃ ᵕ ˂ )ɞ If you did be sure to let me know pile 4 with the strawberry emoji~🍓 Thanks for scrolling through, Hugs hugs hugs!! See you in the next reading🌸🌹💌

Wanna see more readings like this? Check out my tumblr for accurate readings for you!💗🌊🌸

Thanks for reading! \(*^w^)/💌 -Lunadream <3

[w0rmm1lk]

Texting.

Reader: not mentioned.

characters: all characters i write for (besides kota and eri)

type: can be read as both platonic and romantic

sumarry: how i think the mha characters would text.

warnings: possible swearing, denki being denki.

👾Mina Ashido👾

she abuses her emoji privledges. like nobody will ever receive a message from her that doesn't have an emoji. lots of all caps.

👓Tenya Iida👓

oh you were texting him? bitch writes as if he's writing a formal email. your ass is lucky that he doesn't start that shit off with "I hope this message finds you well.". not even kidding will proof read every message he sends at least twice.

♾️Ochaco Uraraka♾️

will end every message that isnt on a serious topic with :D. its so sweet tbh.

⚡Denki Kaminari⚡

this man uses so many abbreviations that even if you think you use a lot just know you're learning a new one everyday. not even kidding makes up his own shit. once sent mina "lmkiydthesicci" and nobody could figure out wtf he meant. lowkey flirting with every mssg he sends. every single person in the class, girl or not has received a message from him that just says "hey bbg ;)". he received a very long lecture from iida and a very confused reply from todoroki. todoroki didn't actually know wtf bbg meant. thought he misspelled bbq at first.

🪨Kirishima🪨

unironically sends messages that just say "rawr". uses the :} face a lot bc he thinks it looks like his unbreakable.

🐙Mezou Shoji🐙

i feel like he has such a low screentime that if anyone needs to text him he's only available for like an hour a day. accidentally leaves ppl on read. messages seem very bland usually.

❄️Shoto Todoroki🔥

another bland person but tbh hes the worst out of them all. like he can look at a whole paragraph asking him if he wants to go to the movies with the rest of the class and all he will reply with is just "ok." uses periods at the end of every message but I swear he's not mad.

💥 Bakugo💥

if he receives any messages past 8pm the "reply" will be you getting left on delivered even if he's still up, or a message just saying "shut the fuck up and go to bed.". also bland but he's more of a "k" bland rather than a "ok." bland.

🥦Izuku Midoryia🥦

he will not even kidding receive a message that just says "hi" and will send a whole paragraph that is basically just a lengthened "hi! how are you?". uses the smiley emoji a lot.

💫Momo Yaoyorozu💫

lots of ! at the end of messages, you can feel the happiness through your phone screen. uses heart emojis at the end of messages and memorizes the meaning of each color so she can use them accordingly.

🖤Shihai Kuroiro🖤

another :} user, sometimes uses :] but mainly :}. only ever texts ppl at hours like 2-4 am. you cant convince me he gets enough sleep.

👔Neito Monoma👔

you think hed text you?/j kinda just an average texter, any message about class 1a will be in all caps.

😈Dabi😈

oh look. another bland ass texter, at least he takes the time to actually type out "okay," only sends emojis if he's talking about how weird the emoji looks.

🔪Himiko Toga🔪

uses :] all the time. not :}, or :). just :]. if anyone texts her, even if its just a simple "hi." and she isn't busy, congrats you've agreed to a 3 hour face time call.

✋Tomura Shigaraki✋

he leaves everyone on read. if you question why he left you on read all you're getting is an "if its so important then talk to me face to face."

🃏Mr. Compress🃏

so you know how earlier i said you were lucky Iida didnt start with "I hope this message finds you well,"? your luck ran out. he writes it like you're a long distant friend who he is sending some fancy ass shit letter to. not even kidding ends each message with "--Compress."

🪽Hawks🪽

types so fast his phone doesnt even register his hands. half his messages be looking like "se tht ouds ood". he doesn't even bother to edit it or correct himself.

👁️Aizawa👁️

he texts like a dad. texting this mf be like:

"ok👍"

"*photo of a weird boat*"

🌙Midnight🌙

miss girl uses so many ;) that its hard to tell if shes suggesting something weird or not. ended every greetings message with that one kissy emoji.

🙂Mirio Togata🙂

uses the 🙂 all the time because he thinks it looks like him. it does.

🌀Nejire Hado🌀

lots of !!! and :D, also uses the :> a lot lol. lots of blue heart emojis aswell.

🦋Tamaki Amajiki🦋

sends articles about different butterflies he likes or thinks the person he sends it to would like along with a message along the lines of "I think this fits you :]". rarely texts first but when he does he clicks send and sitts on the other side of the bed as his phone while staring at it intensely, just waiting for the reply notif. wont actually read the reply for a good minute.

🐈‍⬛Hitoshi Shinsou🐈‍⬛

sends photos of random animals he sees while out and about. usually just cats. (no way this man doesn't feed the strays around ua) another person that only texts at night time.

🛠️Mei Hastume🛠️

uses >:D a lot, shows blueprints of her new babies all the time, ngl they are usually rlly messy. texts are just :

"LOOK AT THIS NEW BABY IN PROGRESS >:D"

"* incomprehensible image of a blueprint *"

⭐Yo Shindo⭐

uses the thumbs up way to much but like in the passive aggresive way yk? but also if you send him a photo of something ur proud of he will reply with a simple "oh that's cool!" but there's so much fucking emotion behind it ur just kinda like ???

🛡Melissa Shield🛡

her messages are so sweet. sunset pictures of the ocean every other day. lots of :).

wrote this is one go and now my hands hate me. i think this was at least 20 characters-? idk I'm struggling to count.

[wonton4rang]

kinda giggling and twirling my toes at that "is your gf single" post... leehan..

can you do maybe like reader making bnd jealous like that (as a joke and just bcuz ur horny)

also can i be 💫 anon

Hiiii, first post after a while !! And ofc, welcome home 💫 anon 💜💜💜

——————————————————————————

jealous much ¡!

pairing: bnd x reader.

warnings: some +18 for the legal line, jealousy (well, duh)

summary: how would bnd react to you making them jealous as their gf (as a joke ofc)

——————————————————————————

sungho; he is honestly a little bit easy to trick, not because he’s dumb but because he believes in you too much and takes for granted everything you do/ say cause… why would his pretty gf do anything to harm him? so when you faked texting and laughing for over ten minutes, turning your screen off when he tried to peek and laugh w u, he got worried, pouting and feeling a little betrayed, not even because he thought you were cheating but because why were u laughing at something without him??? “payback’s a bitch, huh?” you said to him and only then he understood what this was about. he was too busy playing to help u earlier and now that he wanted to be w u, it sucks that he couldn’t :’)

riwoo; a furious blush is already visible on his cheeks when you come out of the dressing room with that tiny skirt, giving him and the other men waiting for their girls a twirl that made everyone in the room stare, yeah, no. he quickly stand up and pushed you back into the small room, looking at you for a few seconds and letting out a sigh when he noticed the smirk on your face. “you’re just horny, aren’t you?” his face so close to yours that you felt his breath against your lips “gonna have to wait a bit for me, baby, we don’t want everyone to hear you moaning like a bitch, right?” And you just LOVED when sanghyeok talked to you like that, his naughty smirk making you feel warmer than you were. You changed so fast istg u were eager to get home now.

jaehyun; a bitch, he didn’t even let you breathe when he was already taking you to the other side of the house, not even talking to you when you played innocent and asked “what’s up with you?”, he would take you to a bathroom and close the door, the music of the party being dimmed by it and would say “do you think is funny when you flirt with my friends in front of me?” , “would you prefer if I do it behind your back?” he was speechless. but soon so were you, your lips were attacked by your boyfriend and you could feel his desperation to get to you, to show you how angry yet passionate he was. you followed the kiss and it soon turned to something else, your pussy starting to leak right when he pulled out, you looked at him confused and he just laughed at you before saying “think it through before doing this type of things again” and you bet you will cause wtf.

taesan; this one doesn’t bat an eye in public tbh, so it was a bad move to try to make him jealous by talking wayyyy too much w sungho and neglect his attempts to join the conversation. he eventually stopped trying to join and just listened, feeling a little bitter by the way you kept laughing and joking with his hyung. wtf were u doing? So when you both got home, you really thought everything was unsuccessful, you just wanted to trigger something in him to get a little action, if u know what I mean. Oh well, you certainly did because next thing u knew was him trapping your body against the wall and looking down at you for a few seconds before laughing in disbelief “if you wanted to make me feel angry or jealous, you succeeded. Now, why?” He spoke in such a low tone, his eyes piercing yours and his face almost expressionless, almost because that hint of something you couldn’t discern was there, “I didn’t-” , “yes, you did. but I think you could explain it to me better in our bedroom, I’ll be waiting” and oh my, u shouldn’t do this again but you certainly will cause he fucked you so right and so deep and nice that your body was craving for it even though you just had it.

leehan; certainly the worst boy to try and make jealous. First things first, he does not get jealous over boys who are uglier than him (which is most boys, btw), he is not insecure at all and he trusts you so he knows that you wouldn’t do anything to actually hurt him. Which is why he is laughing at your attempts to look serious while “flirting” with jaehyun, not even him is believing your act. But leehan would let you play the part, signaling you to join him later by the pool just to spread you open and eat you out like a mad person, he has always got a fixation with your pussy and the fact that you were intentionally trying to make him jealous just turned him on like a flame. His tongue would do wonders, you sitting on the edge of the pool and trying to keep it quiet because there were still people inside of the house, your legs were resting on his shoulders and he was inside of the pool just having the best time of his life while he ate u out, fingered your cunt to make you cum faster and sloppily licked your cum when you finally finished on his tongue. Did you fail to make him jealous? Yes. Now, did you fail your main quest which was getting him to help u out cause u were horny? Hell no.

woonhak; i feel like woonagi would get frustrated because he could easily believe that he would lose you, he might think “she’s my first gf, maybe i’m not a good bf” or something like “maybe I’m too young and dumb for her” but no, he was perfect and you soon noticed that he was feeling down instead of being stimulated into kissing you to mark his property. So you stopped, getting close to him and explaining what you were trying to do, he got mad at the beginning but then he just opened up about how he felt and you both worked it out. Did you get your kiss? Ofc, you guys kissed all night and ended up getting under his sheets while cuddling until the morning.

[bananaactivity]

Im not finished with Carlos fully but he looks good enough for right now ( he’s 22 in this picture here)

I changed Carlos and Evie up, so now Evie is a vain witch like her mother who is fashionable but she doesn’t sew her own stuff. ( which is for the better cse wtf was that ugly ass dress she made for Mal in D2???)

Carlos considers himself to be a very expensive person and can be pretty big germaphobe. He hates getting anything on his clothes and he refuses to wear the school uniforms at Auradon Uni because they’re ugly. He wears lots of black white grey and red, with gold accents usually. He does theme around dog associated items like gold bone cutlets, paw print lapel chains, and a tennis ball brooch. He often wears red gloves and his favorite shoes are his collection of red bottom dress shoes. He likes hiding red on the interlining of his clothes too, such as his jackets and hats and vests.

A lot of his own person style is derived from 1990s London fashion ( as the artist that means I get my references from the 1996 101 Dalmatians live action movie, the styling of Cruela in that movie is ICONIC AND IMACULATE, and I MUST reference her for Carlos.

PURRRR

Of course he wears REAL animal print. And he’s not a weak touch me not prick like some think. He’s still tech savvy and does Anyalitics and specs for the core four. He also loves GUNS 😄. Think of him like a sharp shooter who stays in the back of turf wars and snipes people. The isle doesn’t have many marks men ( they all really like swords for some reason) so he’s pretty dangerous. He builds his own weapons too.

His passion started out as a way for him to collect his own furs but Harry gets him most of what he needs plus he always needs Carlos to redo his wardrobe ( he gets… messy… after a couple days work) Carlos hates that Harry ruins his creations so fast but he pays him well and gifts him rare fabrics and samples from Auradon.

Because Carlos has no magic Mal always underestimates him. She sees him as only a stylist and ranged weapon specialist. Even tho she acknowledges him for his wit and tech skills she still doesn’t listen to him. Sometimes he wishes he could stay with Harry but then he’d have to do more work up front. Harry understood what Carlos was capable of and respected him a lot. What Harry doesn’t understand is that not everybody likes to be covered head to toe in hot sticky blood 24/7. Harry had also promised him a suite on his boat that nobody else was allowed to occupy, but even if Harry’s crew feared HARRY they wouldn’t mind having an attitude with CARLOS for preferential treatment, even if it is what he deserves 🙄

Harry and Carlos’s relationship is the definition of there are two wolves inside you. Carlos smokes and drinks but he’s more of a Marlboro and Merlot type of guy and Harry’s a Rum and Cigar kinda lad. ( I’m using cartoon logic and say that those habits are purely aesthetic based of iconography from the original Disney moves, Cruella smokes and Capt. Hook smokes two cigars at once)

Carols isn’t really scared of dogs anymore but when he arrives at Auradon he “befriends” his roommate Chad ( now an animal lover like his mother) who has pet rats and a entourage of wild animals constantly in their dorm, and threatens to shoot and skin them all every single day to make a new line of coats ( when Chad rebuttals that his rats are too small to make coats, Carlos says they’d make the perfect fuzzy gloves 💀) He also uses Chad as a living mannequin for his designs. They have a goofy relationship with each other, Carlos does make Chad do all the dirty work of skinning and draining the animals he hunts but despite how traumatic that is Carlos is a fun sweet guy so it’s okay 💀💀💀.

Jay is jelly of Carlos due to his closeness with Harry. ( I guess the way to Jays heart and respect is by holding him at sword point and threatening to gut him and hang him by those very guts over shark infested waters and watch them nibble away at him 💀)

Next I’ll find up Carlos and do some fit designs then I’ll redesign Jay and tell that gutting story 😛

[iamlostsomewhereinthegarden]

Obey me brothers order in which they got introduced to the internet and how good they are at using it

I did say I was working on some Obey Me stuff lololol

Lucifer

Order

* The first to use the internet

* He has to make sure it’s safe for his brothers to be on

* Or at least have an idea of what’s going on

* He canonically was the one who introduces it to Levi and Levi had been tech insane forever so he has to be amongst the first

How good are they at using it?

* Just below average

* Much better than a Boomer parent using tech

* But still not as good as the younger generations

* I mean he can he just isn’t aware of the trends and major internet stuff

* Pretty sure he only knows a bunch of internet slang mostly because of Levi tho

* Does not understand them at all though

* “What is this Skibidi…. Toilet?”

* But he uses all tech stuff just prefers to use older things

Mammon

(Tumblr is a bitch and took away yellow saying that it doesn’t look good on white, like bitch? There are other color bg not only white? Do ya’ll even know your own hellsite?)

Order

* Fourth person to get into it

* Didn’t care much for it as an Angel

* Outside of the basics didn’t use it much tbh

* Once he was in the Devildom and incorporated into his sin he was too busy trying to hustle people for money and gambling

* For the most part outside of my top 3 of those who accessed tech I believe most of the brothers didn’t care much for modern tech as they were either busy or it just wasn’t important for them to incorporate into their lives

* Continuing on, it’s not until he heard about online auctions, gambling, betting, etc. that has to do with his sin that he got into tech

How good are they at using it

* This is what he’s in the top 3 with

* He’s number 2 in how good he is with tech

* Can use it

* Can build it

* Can take apart any piece of tech and put it back together

* Can probably make your tech even better if he tries and wants to

* Also knows how to get a top model device for cheap and how much parts are worth

* If Levi is unavailable to help with tech stuff it’s Mammon there to the rescue

* Very good with all online stuff also

* Navigates and finds stuff pretty well and easily

* Knows internet slang and picks up on new trends and phrases easily

* “Ya know I got the rizz baby gurlll”

Leviathan

Order

* Originally you’d think he’d be first

* But he’s third just like his birth order

* Only because it took Lucifer forever to understand wtf was the internet and introduce Levi to anime so another brother skipped pass him for second

* Hooked onto anime really really fast

* Also was into anime in heaven so that’s why he’s in the top 3

How good are they at using it

* Best person

* This one’s a given

* Mods, creation, destruction, recreation

* Could probably make a bomb from a device just chooses not to and doubts his ability to do that

* When they first came down to the devildom everyone was clueless and Levi was onto his Ruri-chan shit from the get go like a true stan and internet user

* Internet slang? Trends? Words? Levi straight up knows it by the heart

* Despite not participating in trends and dancing, he can do them flawlessly just had no self confidence

* Speaking of, pretty sure he accidentally created a bunch of internet slang

* Also it’s canon he speaks in Internet slang irl

* “ROFL not Mammon thinking he can rizz his way out of that situation! He can’t even mew properly!”

* You want a good deal or anything that involves tech stuff game or just anything go to Levi

* Probably taught or helped Mammon know all he knows

* Also massive streamer type energy come to him once you have the basics for streaming set up and he’ll make you amazing

Satan

Order

* He has to be the last person to know and use tech

* He’s the last born so he has to interact and know about tech last

* And even then didn’t really care for tech

* Probably only cares about tech to read online books and movie adaptations (scandalous) and to contact others especially the Anti-Lucifer League

How good are they at using it

* Is not bad tbh

* Better than Lucifer out of spite

* As mentioned before only cares about tech to read online books, watch movies and contact

* Knows trends doesn’t participate unless it’s about books, cats or a prank on Lucifer

* Doesn’t understand or care much about them though

* Better than Belphie worse than Beel

* Only knows the basics of internet slang

* “Rizz? What is that?”

Asmodeous

Order

* This is the brother who stole second place from Levi

* Because of his Asmo parties he eventually found social media and by extension the internet

* If it wasn’t for the Asmo parties and publicity he would’ve had no interest in tech and the internet

How good are they at using it

* Good enough

* Can use almost any app

* But doesn’t know much about the phone in general

* If you need help with a social media app he’s the person to go to

* A lot of social stuff online in the human realm is by his influence

* Does a lot of livestreams on the devildom’s version of instagram

* Does he know trends, slang and challenges?

* Do you even know who the heck you’re talking about?

* He created a lot of the bougie slang and phrases

* “Period Ah Period Uh-“

* “AND THAT’S ON PERIOD!”

Beelzebub

Order

* He’s the 5th to get into it and originally got into it only because his job as an angel when they went a bit tech and it was easier to get notifications on stuff

* Still didn’t use it as an Angel and still doesn’t use it much as a devil outside of ordering food and watching food videos or texting

How good are they at using it

* Average at it tbh

* As I said he uses the phone at the bare minimum outside of food stuff

* Knows all the best food apps

* And the best apps the help with workout routines

* Text him if you need food, just make sure that you get to it first and that he’s been saved some

* Also knows how to stream and does a lot of workout streams

* Come to him to help you work out how to start streaming tbh he’s good at that

* Back to him streaming tho a lot of people show up to his stream because he’s hot at tbh

* Sometimes ends up on Asmo’s streams for skin and makeup stuff or trends

* Is only into food eating and workout trends tbh and not much else

* Not that good at slang gets help from his brothers to understand (and by extension ig also helps Lucifer learn slang)

* “What is rizz? Is that some new food?”

Belphegor

Order

* Literally not the last just because Satan was created last

* Got into it in heaven because of Beelzebub and Lilith

* Actually into it because of the sleep asmrs and stuff to help you sleep and goofy shit he can learn like pranks

How good are they at using it

* Better than Satan due to spite for Lucifer and being involved in Beel’s streaming and stuff

* Also uses it often to search up stuff about where the stars are to adjust the planetarium and be a bit invested in what happens in the human world in Lilith’s honor

* Is great at slang for the sake of Beel who is a sweet oblivious oaf and being asleep or half asleep while being around Mammon, Levi or Asmo at any given time

* Knows trends, rarely participates unless he barley has to do anything in them

* Smug bastard tho

* “You know I got that sleep rizz”

[thelindenpapers]

∆ *Slogging through physical therapy*

∆ *Figure I'll try Misfits and Magic from the beginning, see what the fuss is all about*

∆ Ohh yay, with Lou Wilsooon!!! 🥳😃

∆ *As usual, an OC shows up* Carayiinedahtt (Ka-rai-EE-neh-daht) Clover Violet Birchthorn: Brains 20, Flight 12, Grit 10, Brawn 8, Charm 6, Fight 4

∆ Just say "Clover". Or "Violet". It hardly matters.

∆ 16. She/Her/Hers. Chubby, short, brown-skinned, big-eyed, perpetually-frowning, victorian-esque aura'ed, mostly silent little freak

∆ Constantly clutching a gigantic hardcover book to her chest and staring over top of it

∆ Big fluffy black Afro kept neatly back with a strip of pale-green brocade fabric.

Wearing vintage-esque, handmade, pale-green fit&flare dress, her missing biker uncle's beat-up black leather retro motorcycle jacket, black steel toe construction boots, and a big emerald green backpack

∆ This is basically that feral AF kid who walks blindingly fast down the hallways, never talks to anyone, and refuses to use her locker ever -- she just carries everything no matter how fucking heavy wtf

∆ *Best friend/Mom took sick with a type of illness-induced dementia when she was 10, and was put in a home....Uncle is nice enough, but he's in and out of the apartment unpredictably, never know when or if he's gonna be around*

∆ *tended only to interact with elderly people on writing workshop or seamstressing/tailoring forums*

∆ *Forged uncle's signature on wizarding school application*

∆ She came for the books.

She really only cares about books, she gave up on people a loooonnnnggggg time ago ...but boy, if the library here is how she dreams it might be?....SHE WILL NEVER LEAVE

∆ ZERO compunction telling the trio, "Go away, you suck. 😬😐" ....impatient because, ultimately, they're wasting her reading time and precious seconds of her attention span on being mean for no reason. Dolts. If you're going to waste time at least be friendly or interesting or helpful or fun or else what's the damned point?

∆ *intense, rude crow familiar with one wandering eye who side-eyes everyone just as much as she does*

∆ *glad about the sorting*

∆ *Does giggle with child-like delight at the sapient cauldron and is in deeply respectful awe of the nature teacher*

∆ Me: "Huh. Okay. ...Well I guess she'll get along with Jammer the most? He's the most encouraging among them....or maybe she'll see Sam Black as a big sister? ....🤔 At any rate, those two will probably be the ones to pry her out of that welded-closed shell...."

∆ NOPE.

∆ *watch her eyes get even bigger and sparkly whenever Evan talks knowledge/trivia*

∆ *watch her face cycle through indignant anger and sadness at Evan's struggles*

∆ *starts shadowing behind him and glaring at anyone who looks at him sideways, FIERCELY protective*

∆ *finally hugs Evan, clingy -- like a little kid with a trusted parent in uncertain company*

∆ *sees Dream get kinda' jealous*

∆ *Shadows and gets really close to Dream and looks up and points and goes, "🤨That's my big brother. He's really tall...Did you want to be his girlfriend?🤔 He knows a LOT of stuff; and he seems like he's at least TRYING, which most people don't even bother to do...I can give you some space.", just staring unblinking with her big victorian-orphan eyes*

∆ *I choke on my coffee 💀💀💀*

<3 frfrfr

[strawberrycarat]

Another rant about this episode... I understand that producers can use the "Fire & Blood is a historical novel type so it's not 100% accurate and we can do a lot of stuff with it...." but, come on ! Even Joffrey said Rhaenyra's rests were still down in the red keep. It's clearly they can't fight against the fact that there are actual human remains that are half bitten / half burned by a fucking dragon - so it doesn't make sense that they killed Sunfyre (for all we know he's dead) or that Daemon is still playing in Luigi's mansion with lord Strong instead of bending knees of half the Riverlands and leading small fights for Rhaenyra... as much as we can't know for sure all those details, we know a war happened in real life even if we don't know the specifics - there are records, bodys, graves... Idk... and it should be the same in Westeros...

Producer's creative licence is making the story going so far from the book it's senseless at times + slow in moments that don't help the plot and are somewhat boring + showing preferences for certain actors whose storyline doesn't help the plot in this moment (which is not their fault) + and, worst of all, painfully fast and (sometimes) ridiculous in the most important moments (Exemple : Jace and Cregan’s oath that leads the North going South to end the Dance of the Dragons + the ice and fire pact that leads the prince that was promised + the fight against the darkness and the Others??? But no, let’s give them 3 min of screen time and make Jace leave immediately)

It is true they don't need to show a full ass battle to be interesting, like GoT did in the first seasons. But they at least had a good rhythm, a coherent narrative and plot twists that were actually surprising and logical with the characters and the story at the same time. In here, I think they are just using those "OMG or WTF" moments without thinking about the plot

Exemple -> Cersei and Jamie being discovered by Bran and him being thrown away from the tower? Made sense with Jamie and Cersei's personalities + they couldn't being discovered or Robert would have their heads and their children's, probably - and it was one of the detonating for the Three-eyed raven plot

-> Daemon having sex with his (I can't believe I'm writing this, even if it was an hallucination) mother???? like why???? what does this help to Daemon's storyline? If he had mommy issues, why is this the first time we see it? I can see Aemond having mommy issues in the way his own mother was distant and believe him some sort of monster AFTER Luke's death (kinslayer -> a terrible sin in the Seven's eyes - the religion she follows with passion) and him seeking out an older woman that had some motherly characteristics and with similar hair than her mother + then keeping Alys Rivers (a wet nurse) when conquering Harrenhall is logical to his storyline... but Daemon??? It seemed more like a "let's have a plot twist just for fun and surprise people" kind of thing)

And even when they want to create plot twist that could work in the plot they don't make them really a plot twist....... Like when they wanted to end Cheese and Blood with Alicent and Criston's sex scene. It would've worked........ if they didn't had already show us Criston Cole going down on Alicent in the middle of the episode. WE ALREADY KNEW ! like why ending with that in the episode anyways when there was no surprise - not anymore ?

honestly I don't know how can they save it now - I'm kind of only watching it for Ewan mitchell / Aemond + the acting in general

Anyways, thank you for reading, I needed to let it out.

[madrone33]

I have been CHILLING this week post-Vengeance saga release! I managed to avoid debilitating stress and anxiety from the onslaught of fan stuff by simply avoiding all social media for the first two days, so it's been good!

However, I am now BACK, dumping my immediate reaction of the saga from a week ago. I thought I was ready. I was not ready. 600 Strike blew my mind. I was left staring blankly at my ceiling. Jorge please rest sometime, I'm begging you. The amount of talent beaming through my screen is exhausting even me.

Also, to every cast member and collaborator and behind the scenes person: y'all are amazing. Like seriously. I hope you all get a yummy drink and a cozy blanket and just. Bask in the satisfaction of a job well done. Hats off to y'all fr.

Anyways! I keysmashed the following at around midnight, 14 hours before the livestream ('cause australia is the superior timezone /j). Be warned there's LOTS of swearing 'cause sleep deprivation + incoherent excitement lol

AHHH IT'S GO TIME

Ok it's starting the same as the Goodspeed festival showed. Tho, the first lead in sound thing reminds me of Lucids.

Gorgeous vocals. Hate Calypso, love Wangui fr

"Let me speak!" She really doesn't care about his feelings huh. I noticed in LIP as well, she always makes it about her, which is absolutely in character.

Those ensemble harmonies tho!!

"... You do?" Girl you literally told him to lie smh

"Why in the world won't you love me too?" 'Cause he has a WIFE

IT'S HERMES TIME

FSA melody? YO??

"Cause I had one goal in mind..." the silence where the crew's chorus would come in is PAINFUL

BAG?? HERMES!!

"Hello old friend!" Grinning so hard rn

"Well it's a little bit ✨dangerous✨" AHHH IT'S HAPPENING

Fingertapping and headbopping to this chorus

"Put your whole braiin in it!" I love how he says that sm

"And lastly the wind bag" NEW STUFF

WINIONS

Wow ok I did not expect the wind bag to show up again. Tho it makes sense; this is probs the storm that Ody told Sirenelope kept blocking the way home

ODY SINGING THE CHORUS!!!!

RUTHLESSNESS MENTION

"Hermes! Thank you" AHHH THE CALLBACK! He sounds so tired and like down to his bones grateful this time 🥺

"I'm not the one who fought for you!" MY EYES WIDENED SO FAR. WE ALMOST GOT AN ATHENA NAMEDROP. I'll settle for the reference to her

Okeee. Charybdis!!

Oooh it's just like in the reference vid. No lyrics for this start part!

The 5/4 is amazing. And the electric guitar!!

God this song is SO BADASS

LETS GOOOO ODY!!!

ahhh I KNEW there'd be some sort of soft KYFC esque "I can't wait to make some new memories" type verse AND I WAS RIGHT

he sees ithaca!! Oh god poseidon's gonna show up isn't he

my heart's beating so fast i'm scared

PENELOPEEE

the ELECTRONIC DISTORTION OH NO IT'S HIM

RIGHT INTO GET IN THE WATER AHHH

"Coward" AHHHH I CAN'T BELIEVE WE'RE FINALY HEARING THIS FOR REAL

"That's when our paths collide!" THE RASP

"Now get in the water" Oh shiiiit here we go

the choir is so eerie

"GET IN THE WATER" THE GROWL

"aren't you tired poseidon" ooh it's this part!!

ha he changed it to ten years instead of eight like the demo had XD

"maybe you can learn to forgive" the line from that one snippet!

"No" oop

"DIE" DAMN that deep echo!!

*underwater sounds* oh shit ody's fucking dying

NO! FUCKING POLITES

EURY

ANTICLEA

FUCK YOU JORGE

THE CREW

WAITING??? EXCUSE ME WTF

AHHHHHH WHY TF DOES JAY LOVE HURTING US SO

HUH? HUH??? WHAT WAS THAT! AND THERE'S A FUCKING AD. Probs good, I need the break but WAHT. I KNEW he'd do another fucking polites reference gods damnit jorge WHEN I CATCH YOU

Ok time to hear 600 strike. Holy shit we're here

ELECTRIC GUITAR LETS GOOO

Aeolus theme. IS HE GONNA OPEN THE WIND BAG AGAIN??

600 MEN MOTIF HOLY SHIT

ANIME SCREAM

HOly shit there's magic sounds happening. I'm really curious about whatever Jorge's cooking up for the animatic in the livestream, 'cause I have no clue what's happening rn 👀

"For every comrade!" FSA melody!

"all those _ who were slaughtered by your hand" hmm I can't quite hear what he's saying there?

wait wait wait he's ACTUALLY using the power of his 600 men!!

"You idiot" damn lol

DIFFERENT BEAST ODY HOLY SHIT

is that a blade sound effect?

WAIT DID HE JUST STAB HIM WITH HIS OWN TRIDENT

HOLY SHIT ODY

HOLY FUCK

POP OFF ODY

OMG "MONSTER" AND THEN "RUTHLESSNESS"

BRO HE'S BEGGING??

*trident drops* hot damn ody

"Next to my wife." OHHHHHHH MIC DROP

Holy FUCK that was crazy

I'm gonna listen to it again.

Ok but holy shit Odysseus literally just tortured a god until he gave in?? Daym ody

Tho I like how he tries using open arms first, and then ruthlessness. He's kinda found a balance? I say kinda, 'cause he went hard on the ruthlessness, but since he sincerely tried to ask Poseidon to just drop the whole thing already, his later actions in 600 Strike feel more warranted.

I honestly don't know how Jorge keeps doing it. He just keeps topping himself! Like! Thunder Bringer? And then God Games?? And now Six Hundred Strike??? They just keep getting better! Banger after banger, like!! How.

Wait I just wanna. Sit with it. Imma lie down and stare at the ceiling for a bit, aight?

... I am shooketh.

But BRO THAT WAS INSANE! ODY FUCKED HIM UPPP

AMAZING BRAVO EXTRODINARY INCREDIBLE SHOWSTOPPING GORGEOUS WONDERFUL HOW DARE YOU

[raes-writing-space]

TWST Relationship Headcanons (Floyd, Ruggie, Kalim)

A/N: Suggestive Content Tread Lightly, not explicit, like it’s not full on smut, but it does have sexual themes. Reader isn’t said to be “Yuu” however, it may mention events in the story. Some of these are kind of written as a “funny haha” but it does have some seriousness behind it.

All characters are aged up to consenting age, or as the reader, imagine you are the same age as them (still of consenting age.)

Warnings: Cursing, Mentions of being touch-starved, violence, sexual themes, mentions of yandere vibes in Floyd’s. Possible spelling errors, tumblr won't save my changes no matter how many times I fix them.

Floyd:

I hope you didn’t want personal space. It’s the equivalent to that tiktok sound, “This is Bob, Bob loves his personal space. This is Larry, Larry also love’s Bob’s personal space.”

But honestly a lot of it is because he’s touch starved, and the physical contact he DOES usually have isn’t positive in any way, it’s violent, always fights.

The first time you give him a regular hug for the first time, doesn’t even have to be a full hug, it could be a side hug, he’s like “Wtf was that??? Wait, hold on, I want more of that.”

He always has to be touching you in some way, arm over the shoulder or around the waist, draping his whole body on you, holding hands, intertwining pinkies, hands in your pockets, SOMETHING.

While he does have mood swings, hardly ever do you really have to deal with it, because you always make his days better. Unless you did something to really set him off, he’s always in a good mood with you.

However, it can’t be said towards other people. So, while he might make YOU food that’s really good, he will make everyone else basically eat garbage. And while he might not snap at YOU, he might snap at someone else.

He finds you really interesting, even if you feel like your life is boring, he does not find it boring at all. He wants to figure you out, even if it’s doing “nothing” he still wants to understand why you choose to do said “nothing”, even if it’s something that would typically bore him.

He is BLUNT AF and LOUD AF, so if you good luck trying to keep him from spilling all your relationship info, he is so loud in his love for you, and he does not care if it makes other people uncomfortable to hear about how much he loves your body, mind, personality, etc. If you’re wearing his favorite pair of jeans he’s going to tell you how much he likes your ass in those jeans, and again, he does not care where he’s at or who’s around him.

Even if you’re the more modest or shy type, and try and tell him to “keep it down” he might, MIGHT, respect your wishes, however, don’t be surprised if he just suddenly grabs you and starts whispering in your ear all the shit he wants to say out loud. At least only you can hear it...

Floyd will use his strength and height to his advantage, even if you’re the same height as him or taller, he is really strong, doesn’t matter your weight baby, he will have no issues picking you up like a damn rag doll and throwing you over his shoulder.

He especially does this if he feels as if you’re not spending enough time with him. Floyd is a very needy eel, and he doesn’t like how much time you’re spending studying or hanging with friends, or a hobby, or ANYTHING, and not spending time with him :(( No, he does not care that you have a test coming up!! (Again with point one)

Floyd can get violent if it means protecting you in some way. if you get even so much as a dirty look from someone, he’s already giving the worst “warning sign” look to them EVER. Sevens forbid someone actually makes a threat towards you, because Floyd will make sure that they never so much as look at you, or in worst cases, make sure they never breathe the same air as you ever again.

Things might become sexual with him a bit fast, mostly because he’s touch starved and he’s just kind of overwhelmed with how much he feels for you, that he just sorta... needs to let it out in some way. And there’s nothing better than giving you all the pleasure you could ever want, and then some, be prepared to get overstimulated, it’s not even intentional sometimes, he just... won’t stop...

Floyd CAN make love to you, but even him making love to you can come off as a little rougher some times, he doesn’t mean too, he makes up for it in a lot of kisses, sweet touches, trying to make you laugh, and praise. He can also fuck the shit outta you though if that’s what you want.

On a more intimate note, if you kiss his scars, he’s not going to fully understand what it is you’re exactly doing at first, but once it does finally click that “Oh.” moment he might get overwhelmed and tear up a bit. He doesn’t understand why he’s tearing up, it shouldn’t matter to him that much, and yet, something within him is telling him that it does. Because despite his nature you treat him as if he’s gentle, and soft, and should be cared for and deserves to be cared for in a soft and gentle way.

Don’t take it the wrong way if he needs a minute to recover after that, because being vulnerable was never a thing he was taught to do, and it’s new to him... But he wants to be vulnerable with you, he really does, he just doesn’t know how to show it properly.

While he is a little unhinged, he is loyal, fiercely so, (almost borderline yandere, but it’s not intentional... it’s just how he is.) he has a lot of emotions, most that he can’t always control, but he does support you with everything, and loves you more than he can ever actually say it.

Ruggie:

Ruggie is the definition of “You fell first, he fell harder”, he’s got a charismatic charm to him that everyone to some extent falls for, however, he himself is rather guarded and doesn’t trust easily.

So with you? The fact that he allowed himself to feel comfortable around you and let his guard down? And trust you wholeheartedly? It took him a little while to figure out his feelings and again, allow himself to fall for you, that it was going to be okay, and once he did fall for you, he fell hard.

Of course, he’s still a mischievous little shithead, stealing shit from your pockets just to give it back to you in order to grab your attention and talk to him, or teases you relentlessly for anything you do, it’s just a love language of his. Take it in stride, he just wants to see you smile in some way, even if it’s a sarcastic one.

His biggest love languages are quality time and acts of service, he has a harder time finding the words to comfort or reassure you in the way that you need, he doesn’t have the money to give you gifts all the time (he does try though), and yes, while he does love physical affection too, it’s in the small things he does for you every day that shows his love for you.

Your laundry would be folded even if you didn’t ask, he’d have breakfast ready for you when you wake up, he’ll have a tissue at the ready when you sneeze, he’ll sit with you in complete silence doing different things in the same room, help you study, or distract you from studying, and be the perfect body double when you’re having a hard time doing tasks alone. He himself even understands and appreciates the times you do the same for him.

However, the saying “the way to his heart is through his stomach” runs true for him. Even if you don’t know how to cook, or aren’t very good at it, just the thought of putting in the effort of cooking something for him means more than you know. He’ll teach you along the way, if you’re willing to learn. Even if it’s just you finding a recipe you think he’ll like and would want to learn with him, he’ll appreciate.

There’s some things he will do that you might only understand if you also came from a low-income household. If he makes a pallet on the ground next to your bed for the first time he stays over, it’s out of instinct. Or some of the late night “ingredient dinners” he grabs for himself, it makes sense to him. A spoon full of peanut butter, or a bowl of canned corn and some cheese are typical things that are quick, cheap, and easy to obtain.

He might never get out of that mindset, even after you’ve given him some more security in his life, but don’t hold that against him, that’s just how he learned how to survive in his childhood, he got what he could, even if it meant stealing it, and he tries his best to hold out until whenever his next full meal was, whether that’s in an hour or two days from now.

Ruggie is incredibly hard working, he works various part time jobs, and he’s picked up a plethora of skills, he’s a little good at everything, if you need your makeup done, he’s your guy. Ripped shirt? He can sew it for you. You took up a niche hobby but you aren’t sure where to get started? Ruggie’s got you.

However, he can run himself completely ragged if you don’t tell him to take a break and just take care of him. Do some of his chores, cuddle him, let him take a nap with you, feed him, let him vent to you, anything. He’ll appreciate it all the same, and he’ll always make sure that you never want for anything in return.

Being in a relationship with Ruggie means being in a partnership, he’s devoted, and will put in 100% into the relationship, but you need to put in 100% on your end too, whatever that means to you. He’s in it for the long haul, but he needs to know that you’re going to be there for him when he has nothing, or when he has everything, and he needs to know that you’ll support him regardless, because he’ll support you in the same way.

Sex with Ruggie is always a mixed bag based on the mood, and what both of you need or want out of it. I believe he’s a switch, entirely, and if you want him to take initiative he will, and if you want to take initiative, he’ll follow. He can be serious, he can be goofy, he can make love to you and be incredibly intimate, or he can fuck you and treat you like a slut if that’s what you want.

You can make him beg even, just don’t forget to praise him. He lives for your praise regardless if he’s a sub or a dom, he just wants to make sure he’s doing enough for you, and if you need to switch things up again, tell him. He’s very understanding and adaptable.

Sudden leg cramp? Massages it out, gets you some water, and asks if you want to continue. You’re not quite close to orgasm because of XYZ? He’ll change it up for you so you can get there. You suddenly just want to stop? He would never make you feel guilty for it, if you want to stop, then you two will stop, that’s it.

He’s all for non-sexual acts of intimacy though, bathing is especially his favorite. He loves taking baths or showers with you, and after awhile he almost gets weird taking showers or baths without you, because it just doesn’t feel the same. He feels like he’s somehow also wasting precious water that could be easily saved if you just there with him.

His community means a lot to him, if he brings you back to his hometown, he doesn’t expect everyone to like you, but if you at least put in the effort to get to know them, learn, help, whatever it is that you need to do, he’ll love you even more for it. He’s seen as a big brother to a lot of the younger kids, and if they love you, then he knows he’s found the right person to settle down with.

While there are some people who are definitely your significant other but not exactly your best friend, Ruggie is 100% your best friend and your significant other. He see’s you in the same way. You should be able to laugh and feel comfortable with him, as much as he’ll laugh and feel comfortable with you.

Kalim:

Right off the bat I want to say that Kalim is not as naive as many people perceive him as. He’s emotionally intelligent, but he struggles with seeing the bad in people because that means that the world really is as scary, and awful as people say it is, and that’s not what he wants to see it as..!! He chooses to be naive as both a mix of him being actually a little naive, and as a coping and survival mechanism to some of the traumas in his life.

With that being said, while he is emotionally intelligent, it takes him a minute to differentiate his feelings for you, he wants to be sure that he legitimately is in love with you, and not just infatuated with the idea of you. Kalim romanticizes a lot of scenarios, so for him, of course it’s easy to fall in love with the idea of you, so he takes more time with you, gets to know you better, lets himself feel every emotion with you, and when he finally confesses his feelings for you, know that they’re genuine.

It’s very easy for Kalim to just want to spoil you rotten, if you’re not into it, you gotta tell him that. All he wants in the end is to make you happy, however he makes you happy isn’t really the necessary part to him as long as you’re happy. So, if you like being spoiled, as long as you’re happy, he’ll spoil you. If you feel weird taking his gifts, which are quite expensive, and you get awkward when he sings your praises and wants to throw a parade in your honor? Tell him, and he’ll better suit your needs.

He won’t stop gift giving if you aren’t the type that likes getting gifts, but if he sees a flower while walking, he’ll give it to you, and if you need a sweater because you’re cold, you can take his. If you don’t like crowds he’ll plan something that’s just the two of you.

Jamil will thank you if you end up being the guiding voice for him, in my opinion he reeks of ADHD, just like Floyd, but while Floyd grew to learn different life skills (due to his background), Kalim grew up in privilege and never needed to learn those skills, and was also encouraged not to learn, which didn’t do him any favors. However, Kalim can and does want to learn, if you’re wiling to teach him and be patient with him, he can be clumsy, he’ll have a deep respect for you.

Kalim is used to being coddled by his family, so if he slowly but surely start to make him see reality for what it is, a mix of good and bad, beautiful and ugly, he’ll start to open up himself in different ways even he didn’t realize he knew he had. Make sure to support him through it all, he might need to do some healing he didn’t realize he needed to do... (C’mon, poor boy really had to live with the fact that he can be casually poisoned at any moment, that kind of lifelong paranoia can’t be good for even the best optimist...)

He’s can learn to master any love language if he wanted to, even if he might need a little bit of guidance, he will always be first and foremost, a dedicated partner. Communicate with him, that’s the most important part, he won’t know unless you tell him, even if it you end up having to be a bit blunt, still tell him.

He didn’t realize how touch starved he was until he started dating you, he’s always been a physically affectionate person, but a lot of people push him away or are just uncomfortable with how affectionate he’s being. So the fact that he can be physically affectionate with you? Oh man, he comes off as really needy, he kind of is, but it’s always got rose colored glasses on, so he’s just a sweetheart who just really wants to please you.

However, he’s still new to romance, he’s always wanted to be romantic with someone, so while he’s physically affectionate, he gets nervous when he wants to kiss you. He starts off with kissing your knuckles, then the inner part of your wrist, then your cheeks, but he always makes himself too flustered to fully kiss you on the lips, at least, for the first time.

Once you initiate the first kiss with him, then it’s over for, then he’ll openly kiss you all the time, never really making out, but a lot of “pecks” on the lips, and god forbid he has to go do something important without you, because one “goodbye kiss” turns easily into a dozen goodbye kisses if you don’t stop him and tell him you’ll see him later.

You’ll have to guide him through his first make out session, he’s got a lot of pent up energy that he doesn’t really know what to do with, he gets a bit overwhelmed, and while he’s into it, his hands shake when he pulls you closer, or he grips onto your clothes a little too tight...

But once again, once the first is over, you’ll find him quickly wanting more of you, and finding himself getting a little greedy with wanting your love, it’s as if he’s been running at 100% battery his entire life with no real good way to release even a little bit of that energy, so when you give him that outlet, he wants to just give all of his energy to you.

Speaking of, the first time you have sex with him, it’ll be a little clumsy, but again, once he learns, like I’ve mentioned a few times, he just wants to please you. So much so, he might not actually realize he’s overstimulating you, he’s just taking your moans and reactions as a positive thing, and is just going to keep going, because obviously he’s doing something right, and you’re pleased, but doesn’t realize there is such a thing as too much.

He’s definitely a switch, of course, if he is dominant, he’s a service dom maybe even bordering pleasure dom sometimes. Also, Kalim is very loud, he moans, whines, groans, anything and everything, always praising you for something, even if it isn’t even related to sex, he’s just saying the first thing that’s coming to his mind, which, really isn’t much considering his brain turns to absolute mush when he’s fucking you, but it’s something.

Kalim loves laying on your stomach and just... staring at you... He considers himself so lucky to have someone like you loving him, and he hopes you feel the same way, he wants you to feel the same way.

If you meet his family, good luck with his siblings, they’ll have a thousand questions and he will want to answer all of them, even when he really shouldn’t. And, he also has lost count of how many siblings he has, so... it’s very easy for him to just... sort of forget who you’ve met and who you haven’t.

If his parents somehow don’t approve of you for some reason, Kalim will defend you! He will struggle to find the words at first, more confused and hurt by his parents choice, but in the end he’ll choose his love for you over any riches he could ever hold or own. To him, you are his greatest treasure. The most valuable thing in his life.

He finally understands what it means when people say things are “priceless” not in the way in which he originally believed, thinking they were under-valuing something or that it was free, but that it meant that no money in the world could ever make them consider parting with whatever it was, and for him, that’s you.

Kalim is a sunshine child, but he’s not so naive, if you’re willing to be patient with him, guide him, love him with everything, he’ll do the same for you in return. He’ll always know when you’re upset, even if it hasn’t fully hit you yet that you were upset, he wants to help you with anything, and he wants to grow with you.

[lantanasmuttyfanfics]

i have a fanfic idea!!! 💡

can u do a part 2 of the previous good king x evil queen fanfic where they first met? also i wish you well with dealing with the breakup and it’s totally understandable if you don’t feel like writing right now just take ur time!! 🩷

Part 1 was posted like a month ago and was requested by this same person so it shouldn’t be too hard to find

Anyway school started again and tell me why I have ZERO classes with my friends like wtf it’s so unfair bc they all have classes together

Hope you enjoyed and have a great dayy!!

—————————

The evil queen fidgeted with her heels as she walked in front of the mirror. Tonight was her date with the good king and she didn’t know how to feel.

She knew it was wrong. She was a villain and he a heroic prince, they didn’t make sense and she couldn’t even imagine people’s reactions but yet here she was.

“Going out?” Red smiled as she silently observed the evil queen from her bed. The evil Queen slightly jumped after being lost in thought.

She also sensed the teasing note in her voice, “so what if I am?”

“Oh nothing…”

“Spit it out Red.”

“Are you going out with someone?”

The evil queen paused, checking the time before she gazed at her roommate. She had to cautious about what she said, she never knew who Red could spill to.

“You ask to many questions.” Red scoffed and the evil queen was tempted to cast her a silencing spell on her before she realized the time.

Without a second word she was out the dorm and making her way to the schools entrance. In matter of second she saw him standing there with a bouquet of black roses in hand.

“Are those for me princey?” The good king turned with a start his eyes jumping as he laid eyes on her.

He went to say something but he found the words stuck in his throat as he gazed at her amethyst eyes and platinum hair.

And he couldn’t even begin to explain how his heart fluttered as she stood there looking so… there was no word he could find. No word worthy of her.

When he realized he hadn’t replied he handed her the flowers he practically shoved them in her face. “You look… very beautiful.”

The evil queen found herself slightly smiling as she smelled the flowers before enchanting to never wither and then making the disappear to her dorm.

“Shall we go?” The evil queen raised a brow her nails grazing his arm as she wrapped her arm through his.

“Of course.”

——

The good king brought the evils queens chair back as she slipped into her seat with dark eyes.

He held back a shuddering breath as he sat across from her, he really couldn’t believe he had managed to get a date with arguably the prettiest girl in ever after.

There was something enchanting about her, something that drew him in and made him want to never want to look away.

“It may sound strange but I’m curious… why me?”

“What are you talking about?”

“Well I’m not really the type of girl people like you go for.”

“I- what?”

“I’m the evil queen your the good king doesn’t really make sense.”

The good king didn’t have a reply, he knew this was strange but he wasn’t one to care deeply what people thought of him.

The evil queen knew he was a good person, it was even in his name but she was apprehension. What if this was some joke? A prank he was playing on her.

She may be evil but she wasn’t one to play with infatuation of others. She liked to hex and throw curses on damsels, liked to make a princes life harder than it had to be.

“I know this is weird.” Her attention snapped back to the good king. “But I was serious. I want to take you out on dates and I want to be with you.”

He looked deeply in her eyes his hand carefully taking her hand in his. “If this is something you want then… please consider going out with me again to that party Goldilocks is throwing.”

And as the evil queen stared at him her mind wondering with endless possibilities, there was only one thing on her mind. How much she wanted to continue whatever this was.

Dinner went by in a second, so fast that they both couldn’t believe that it near two in the morning as they walked along the enchanted forest.

“Oh! And then he grabbed the-.” The good kings words died in his throat as he felt her soft hand wrap around his. Her fingers interlacing and nails slightly grazing his hand.

“And he?”

He stammered for a few seconds, his mind jumbling up. The scent of her perfume was consuming every inch of him.

“And he- he grabbed the-.”

“Mhmm.”

The evil queen smirked as the stopped in the middle of the forest, the only light being the fireflies.

She ran her hand down his chest and he shuddered again. Grimm she was doing things to him.

Leaning down they shared a breath as he brought her hand to his lips, leaving a soft kiss on the back and savoring the feel of her skin.

The evil queen felt her mouth go dry and flutters dance around in the pit of her stomach. Was this what the princesses meant by butterflies in the stomach?

No. She softly shook her head, that was ridiculous she was the evil queen she didn’t get such nonsense.

But then why did she feel like this when his lips met her skin?

Tilting her head up she looked between his eyes and lips, hesitating for a moment. She knew she did it before but that was before she realized just how much she liked him.

The good king seemed to read her mind as the next second his lips were on hers in a kiss that portrayed the words they couldn’t get out.

Her arms wrapped around his neck and his on her hips. In the dark night filled with fireflies and a pair no one could ever imagine they kissed leaving behind every emotion they couldn’t speak.

—————————

Also if you guys remember my ex well he now has a new girlfriend which apparently he was talking to while with me so yeah fucw men

Anyway can we talk about how annoying it is when you go on a ship tag that is not that popular with the fandom so ALL the posts are negative like at this point they should make a ‘anti-xyz’ tag

Hope you enjoyed and have a great dayy!!

[gloriousburden]

Dw about the long response!! I'm happy to read everything :) And goodness I agree on so many levels! I ended up criticizing so much I had to cut this a little short, since I often start rambling in between, but … What got to me the most were these aspects that were either treated poorly or weren’t thought of at all (You might’ve seen these already so … U don’t have to answer, again, hh ((though I am happy to hear your thoughts if you have anything to say or just thought of stuff!))):

Loki’s heritage - I … I don’t know man. I guess we don’t care he’s a frost giant. That definitely didn’t mess him up. No. Not a mention of what happened while he was exiled or when he was with Thanos. These are such big events in his life. Like, enormously big. (Also him trying to end it at the end of Thor 1... man...) It’s trauma after trauma, and in the Avengers and TDW it’s quite easy to see how they affected him too, since he is so different compared to Thor 1. And no, I don’t mean to say he was an innocent baby before ofc - you already tackled that argument on another post quite well, and I’d like to add that it’s literally how he AND Thor grew up. It’s not just Loki. Sure after the trip to Midgard Thor comes back different since he learned shit but before that?? We saw how Thor acted. They took from Odin, afterall, who participated in numerous wars - it’s obvious. They’re morally gray characters - both Loki and Thor. And what made it worse is that Thor and Odin’s wrongdoings were “justified” while the moment Loki did anything he got all types of repercussions - which all of them should’ve had really. You're putting three people together, all of them made similar mistakes but only one of them is getting yelled at. Everytime. And the other two are praised for it. Why can Thor and Odin do it and he can't? If the heroes do it it's for the greater good ... but Loki's a monster, right?

TVA and just … Sylvie and Mobius. A mess. I actually didn’t like the concept of the TVA a lot, and the whole storyline in general but I won’t get into that or else it turns too long - so I’ll just focus on these two and some of Loki’s aspects. He just … “opens up” to these guys. When he … just came from an awful background. Family trauma, him being a Jotunn (another thing they fucked up, no magic? why isn’t he blue then) and all the shit he went through with Thanos. He’s captive yet again. Like everything is just repeating - I think that’d be quite traumatic and he surely wouldn’t talk about anything with them. Also whenever he spoke about his “troubles” it just felt like it was more to explain it to the viewers rather than the characters? Like it wasn’t subtle and sometimes it just felt out of place for me. Could be that I don’t remember well, but still. What was allat. Idk how to explain, I hope you get it lol

While I won’t deny some moments with Mobius did make me grin because Owen Wilson just brings a smile to my face, it’s… Yeah, no. How is Loki already “opening up” to this guy. Why is he letting him do all of that. What’s going on. He’s one of your captors. CAPTORS. Wtf. I think you also covered this in another ask. Sorry if I'm repeating things hh

Sylvie I don’t even know how to go in that argument. I was devastated. I don’t think I have the words. Not only was everything so fast and I despised this weird toxic self-cest ship because … Wtf. Not to mention how quick it all was, they jumped to a "romantic" route after what, 1 or 2 conversations and Loki suddenly "catches feelings" for someone who's an alternate version of himself (which let's be honest it's only because they decided Sylvie was going to be a woman, but they had to mess that up too - another concept they handled HORRIBLY since Loki's gender is fluid and it shouldn't be so shocking for her to be female?? Especially to him and all Loki's variants?? Why is it even an argument!! I know I shouldn’t be surprised because it’s Disney and Marvel but fuck!! [[not even sure anymore since I read that Sylvie cannot shapeshift… Idk if it’s true, again doesn’t make any sense]]) which by itself is so illogical and makes no damn sense. Most shows just handle romance and relationships like ass and I can’t believe people actually like it. Especially since this is all … Toxic?? Not even romance. Gosh I have no words because of how messy it all was.

Also little observation, I’m a little slow and I don’t know if someone mentioned this already but right at the beginning of the series the introduction is almost symbolic in a sense, lol. He’s shown with shorter and different hair compared to the Avengers, which might seem little, don't get me wrong, but … still. Maybe I’m picky with details, however it is already a change. Then, some moments later, he’s shed of his Asgardian fit too and placed in a variant uniform. Again, obvious things. But really, they decided to just. Pick his character and make … a complete new one. It’s like making an OC after putting so many headcanons on a character that it’s not even THAT character anymore, it’s just… An OC. Definitely not voluntary, it just something I noticed lol

And clearly they show it later in the episode that it’s exactly what happens. He’s just mocked continuously, which is one thing that irked me a lot like you, because it kept going and going, it wasn’t just a moment, no, they kept going with that. What's the point of the series?? Where's the development?? None of these characters grew. None.

There’s probably more but … I don’t wanna write no more lol. I’m probably gonna start reading the comics too. They seem far more promising.

Thanks for listening again!! :D Hope you're doing well btw!!

No exactly. Loki’s heritage, a FUNDAMENTAL ASPECT OF HIS CHARACTER, has not ever been spoken about again unless it was to mock him. I wasn’t expecting them to full on show his Jotun form or anything of that sort, but you know what, maybe I expected them to talk about it in a non humorous manner for a second or two. Considering the fact it plays a HUGE part in who Loki is. Him only being a political pawn to Odin, instead of being a son to him as he thought, is why he is the way he is. You cannot excuse or undermine that. It is just as (if not more) important as “Ohhhh Loki’s jealous of Thor..” because it is literally the source. It’s the explanation.

There is a reason he was raised with inadequate care, and it wasn’t just because Thor was stronger physically or because he fit the image of the Asgardian ideal more than Loki did.

Loki was never meant to be loved, period. It wasn’t because of his mischievous nature. It wasn’t because of him gravitating towards magic and sharp weapons rather than brute strength. It was because when he was a baby on Jotunheim, he was taken in as a future pawn, instead of as a son to be loved despite any differences or despite how he grows up.

Getting to what you said about Thor and Odin being able to be heroes, while Loki is a villain no matter what he does… it is because Loki is only there to move the plot forward. Even if he does something reasonable, or something that could even be seen as heroic, it does not matter because he is not worthy of being seen as a hero. He’s only there to be a rival to Thor. In Odin’s eyes, he cannot be loved or praised, because the image of worthiness was always far from Loki’s own image.

The series was never meant to be about Loki. It was meant to pave the way for the Multiverse saga(?) and to introduce the next big enemy (Kang the Conqueror) but we all know how that went. You can drive yourself crazy with MANY questions like… oh, how did they forget this? How did they disregard that? Because Marvel just needed a pre-existing character to fuck up, get captured by the TVA, and everything else that happens. It’s not Loki specific, because why would Marvel ever do anything good for not only Loki but Tom Hiddleston who’s put so much care and love into playing Loki?

Why would they talk about Loki’s encounter with Thanos, the events of Avengers, the events of Thor? This is supposed to be Loki STRAIGHT OUT OF THE AVENGERS, and they didn’t talk about it besides insulting him. We didn’t get any POV from Loki. Nothing. If we didn’t get a Loki’s POV on the events he’s just gone through, why would it do him any kind of justice? WHY WOULD THEY TALK ABOUT HIS HERITAGE?

The only way the series could work, is for Loki to be dumbed the fuck down and at a disadvantage. Even if he is without his abilities/weapons, Loki is VERY intelligent. If this was ACTUALLY Loki, his ass would’ve manipulated his way out of there with EASE. Marvel has always downplayed how intelligent Loki is, of course they’d do it in a series that is supposed to uplift him. It’s only Loki that gets dumbed down in his own series.

The no magic at the TVA thing… I don’t even know man. I’m going to assume the contradiction is due to the writers forgetting/disregarding anything that’s relevant to Loki’s character once again as well as them not being able to CGI Tom Hiddleston blue for however many hours the series runs for. They could’ve at least gave some kind of bullshit excuse for it. I’ve seen some theorize that Odin’s spell was just that powerful, or that it changed Loki biologically permanently or something. I don’t really remember please forgive me lol there’s posts made by others on here with more information if you are interested. I just think of it as them not caring about Loki once again.

Please do not apologize! The reason I make posts is so I can further discuss my points with others. I love hearing from everyone, and I really appreciate this ask! Forgive me for not getting to it sooner. I’ve been busy, and also wanted to make sure all of this made sense before posting. If you want to discuss anything that I’ve previously spoken of, I genuinely would love to and would appreciate it. I’m glad that people actually listen to what I have to say lol

They had to speed run the development of every relationship in order for the plot to work out, so that’s why Loki, known for not trusting others as well as being known as someone who shouldn’t be trusted, was opening up to a complete stranger (WHO WORKS FOR AN AUTHORITY) who was holding him captive, and insulting him every chance he got.

Also the “I’ve studied every aspect of your life” thing about Mobius is so weird to me??? You did that, but do not understand Loki at all and insult him??? Asshole. I hate that guy.

The concept of the series is SO fucking stupid in the first place. Not sure if you know this, but a good chunk of the plot is a screenplay/scrapped project Michael Waldron wrote a while back. Once again, Loki was never the focus of any of this. It was not written with him in mind. He needed a strong female lead, and a “male” lead to project his own plot onto basically. They just recycled it.

“The worst guy of all time and the girl who came to kill him” [Link]

It is so fucking bad, and it makes so much sense.

Sylvie… she’s definitely a character! Like she’s played by an actress, has lines, and stuff…

There is so much to be said about her. Waldron is HORRIBLE at writing women (as you can tell by the horrendous screenplay I’ve linked) and the entire concept of her character is dumb as fuck. I believe I’ve said this before, but she’s like three pre-existing characters mashed into one to keep her unique/distinctive from Loki, YET SHE BRINGS NOTHING INTERESTING TO THE SERIES AT ALL!!! HOW ARE YOU THREE CHARACTERS, BUT SO BORING??? Can Sylvie really not shapeshift? I didn’t know that. She’s literally… a Loki. That makes no fucking sense not only because of Loki in the MCU/comics, but also because of Norse Mythology Loki. The literal origins.

About Loki’s gender/sex being fluid… they never cared about that which is why Loki (and the other variants) were so fucking baffled that Sylvie was female. Not going to lie, It kind of felt misogynistic to me. A variant of Loki being in a female form could’ve been really cool, but the MCU has to fuck up anything related to female characters.

The romance… 😃

Man, the motive behind it is so fucking stupid too. Self love, because Loki has always loved himself guys. He’s so narcissistic!!! Of course he would fall in love with a female variant of himself. Because he’s so self obsessed.

Loki, ONCE AGAIN, a character known for not trusting others, would SOOOOO fall in love with someone he just met. He’s been lied to numerous times in his life by people he loved and trusted, but it’s very logical for him to fall in love with someone who’s done nothing but belittle him for a few interactions.

He had more chemistry with that book he was reading in his cell in TDW then he did with Sylvie. (or Mobius for that matter.)

Omg yessss I ship them so hard!! That’s what they sound like. 🤦🏻‍♀️

I think that “toxic” relationships can SOMETIMES be written decently in fiction, but this… 😁

Sylvie just constantly belittles Loki, and he doesn’t even belittle or mock her back! It could’ve been playful and not one sided, but if Loki dared to belittle Sylvie the way she did to him, her entire character would make no sense and every flaw would have to be given a second thought. Something the writers would never do.

They didn’t point out each other’s flaws, it was only Sylvie pointing out Loki’s. Same thing with every other character interaction Loki had in the series. It was all about “humbling” him, and no one else. AND THE SERIES IS SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT HIM!

I personally do not like romance in fiction in general, but GOODNESS is the MCU exceptionally horrible at handling it.

(Changed color of the ss because it was blending in with my own text lol)

No, this… this is spot on.

I’ve always thought of this as well. It put such a bad taste in my mouth. But, at least they were honest about how the series was going to go from the beginning. The first thing they do is strip him (literally) of who he is in every way possible. His personality, his armor, and his hair isn’t even the same. No because Loki really is just a base character for their shitty story. How anyone who claims to like Loki cannot see the symbolism you mentioned, as well as him NOT BEING LIKE HIMSELF WHATSOEVER, I don’t know… it was the first thing I noticed, and when I watched the series, I had probably only watched the movies featuring him a few times. That’s how stark the difference was to me.

ALSO THIS?????

EXACTLY! IT FELT LIKE IT WAS MORE TO EXPLAIN IT TO THE VIEWERS RATHER THAN THE CHARACTERS!!!!!! That is an amazing point, and I’ve been trying to put that into words. Everything is just so fucking disconnected and unnatural feeling. The interactions are so fake. HORRENDOUS WRITING. I didn’t know it could get this bad.

Once again, so sorry for not getting to this sooner. Thank you so much for the ask, and I appreciate your thoughts! You made a lot of good points, and you don’t need to apologize for anything. Feel more than welcome to send asks any time you’d like! ❤️

[leserattevirginie]

Crown of Shadows by C.S. Friedman

Genre: Sci-Fantasy Star Rating: 4,25 ⭐️

Plot: ⬜️ Plot holes big enough for a herd of elephants ⬜️ I think I’ve read this before. (Unoriginal to the max.) ⬜️ No plot, just vibes ⬜️ Enjoyable but not super memorable. ✅ You have my undivided attention. ⬜️ Mind = Blown

Characters: ⬜️ Mary Sue is in the house! ⬜️ These are cardboard cut-outs. ⬜️ Good main cast, but the rest is forgettable at best. ⬜️ Generally well written. ✅ Complex ⬜️ What do you mean characters? These feel like real people!

Personal Enjoyment: ⬜️ DNF ⬜️ Somebody free me from this hell (but also no, I won’t DNF) ⬜️ WTF did I just read??? ⬜️ I don’t like it, but I also don’t hate it. ⬜️ It’s a good book but I just never want to pick it back up. ⬜️ No strong feelings either way. ⬜️ Enjoyable read ✅ What a page turner! This is fun! ⬜️ I think I’m in love ⬜️ (new) all time favourite

World Building: ⬜️ This takes place in our world. ⬜️ Worldbuilding what worldbuilding? ⬜️ This feels like a TV set. ⬜️ Not super deep, but present. ✅ Detailed, believable. ⬜️ You bet every single ant has its own 100 page backstory!

Pacing: ⬜️ drags/is rushed in all the wrong places ⬜️ Inconsistent ⬜️ something undefinable feels off ⬜️ I don’t love it it but it fits the book perfectly. ✅ Good/no complaints ⬜️ Amazing! Could not put this down!

Writing: ⬜️ This is painful ⬜️ I’m cringing ⬜️ Not great, but not bad either. ⬜️ Neutral (Didn’t really notice.) ✅ Elegant but not overly flowery. ⬜️ So beautiful I actually stopped and noticed it. ⬜️ I’m not sure if this is just a bad translation. ⬜️ I’m not confident enough in my language skills for this language to comment on the quality of the writing.

Wow, I can't believe I've finished the series this fast! That alone says a lot about how much I liked it :) As usual, here's a bunch of rambly thoughts:

For the most part I feel like I did about the other two books - plot is fine but character work and world building take the cake. The plot was still fairly straight-forward, but I will say that it was a bit more complex with the dual plot-lines. A bit I don't think I've mentioned before that I love: due to the set up we get sorcery and sword type stuff but also tourism, instant soup, insurance companies, etc. (Did I imagine the aspirin?) The mix between modern and old timey things is great!

Unfortunately I also still feel the same about the treatment of women within the series. Sure, the argument could be made that maybe it's just Damien who's a bit misogynistic in his POV, and Gerald is just generally The Most Terrible Person ™ around, but it still doesn't sit right with me. Especially since we start the book with Gerald's lunch committing suicide. Was that weird bit about Damien's landlady necessary? Was there no other way to explain how Iezu perceive the world other than "Holy shit can you believe that middle aged lady dares to think of herself as attractive, lol what a hag" ?? But hey, Narilka is still alive! I suppose if you exist to redeem the Gerald clone you get to live. (I can't believe I forgot poor Almea in my last rant. The fridging that started it all! ...is it still fridging if the man murders her himself??)

As for the plot lines, on one hand I really, really enjoyed getting more POVs! ...maybe just not the ones we actually got xD The patriarch was probably my favourite, even if almost every second I spent inside his head was incredibly frustrating. Some of that may be due to Calesta's influence, but for the most part it's probably just him being the fantasy-pope. There's a reason I left the church xD That being said, I appreciate that he actually whole-heartedly believes what he is preaching. The thing that confuses me the most about the church is its stance on working the fae. As I understood it, it was designed to focus the fae, making it a bit less dangrous for the general population. And also providing humanity with the concentrated power of the beliefs and faith of thousands if not millions, which could eventually be used for space travel. (Or something in that vein.) Anyway, I thought it was very clear that they are still manipulating the fae, just on an enormous scale, and disapproved of private sorcery. But at times it kind of felt like the patriarch sort of forgot that (or deliberately repressed it?). All those "no, this isn't witchcraft, this is a miracle from God!" moments felt so odd because - of course its the same thing? You literally created your God yourselves by those exact same means??? Oh well, church is hypocritical, fork found in kitchen.

Andrys and Narilka I actually liked well enough, as long as they weren't on page together. Or thinking about each other. Actually, scratch that. I liked Narilka when she wasn't being compared to teacups or dolls! But then she had to fall in love with Andrys after talking to him...twice? Andrys... I mean he was there and relevant to the plot. I do feel bad for him, but there wasn't really that much to him other than (admittedly horrific) trauma and an uncanny resemblance to his great-great ....-great grandpa. And drugs to cope with all of that. Small pet peeve: the nickname Andri. WHY. You're literally just taking of one letter (and changing the other because....aesthetics??)

On to more enjoyable ramblings!!! The Damien-Gerlad dynamic in this book was just *chef's kiss* You can't just hit me with the "You changed me" speech that early in the book, I was not prepared xD The many ways in which we see the depth of their...friendship... were just sweet (especially post-hell), and such a contrast to the first book! (Well, Damien still tells us constantly how hot Gerald is, that hasn't changed at all xD My dude literally described his very platonic bestie as "aesthetic perfection". A few pages after Karril rerminds us of how very straight he is, of course.) Now maybe at this point my rose coloured shipper glasses are just glued to my face, but that moment when he tried to explain how Almea supposedly feels also slightly came across as him projecting just a bit. (Gerald is right, Almea (or the Almea-thing) has every right to be pissed, honestly she should have shown up with ghostly divorce papers. Or maybe Damien was right and she just wanted to see him jump into a volcano for a good cause, who knows.) There are some things I would have loved to see more of: - the mental link between Damien and Gerald was criminally under-used, imo. Did it change Damien physically somehow, since Gerald no longer felt cold to him? Is he now part vampire for ever xD (And dear god that whole bit about taking the Hunter into his body, whyyy xDD) - honestly I would have loved to see Gerald readjusting to being human (and being incredibly annoyed about it) a bit more. It's been 900+ years, surely there's stuff he's forgotten? I mean he spent the vast majority of his life being the stuff of nightmares! - Gerald honestly wanting and trying to redeem himself (sure, he was ready to sacrifice himself in the end, but it kind of struck me as a last minute decision. And you can't tell me being the first to kill a Iezu and saving the world didn't also appeal to his ego). But I get that that would take another 10 books, minimum

Damiens break with the church was a long time coming, and handled well, I think. Oddly enough, priest never struck me as a job that you can just quit.

I just remembered about Gerald's apprentice (Amoril?). What an idiot. I would have loved to know how he came to be the Hunter's apprentice though. Can you apply for scolarships? Anyway, trashing a library is unforgivable in my book ;)

Oh, and Hell! Hell was surprisingly meh to me, but I did appreciate the insight into how the Iezu operate (which was probable the main point of that scene anyway). Love that Damien could just reason with the literal devil. (But the concept of the Devil as a non-unified entity was actually cool though). How did it take Damien so long to understand what the mountain of dead women could possibly be. Neither he nor the reader are stupid enough not to get it. Friedman usually doesn't hold our hand and over explains in the series, why start now?? Shock factor? I doubt anyone cared enough about Sisa? Sasi? for that to work.

OK I promise I'm coming to an end soon but guys. Guys. The epilogue. The freaking epilogue. What a trip that was xDDD 1) The Wedding. Karril POV was... certainly something! We now officially know that not only women find Andrys attractive. (Take that, Damien "idk, he's probably attractive to women but also aesthetic perfection" Vryce. Did I need to know about potential Iezu sex that only benefits the (currently presenting as) male partner? No, not really. Also WTF was that scene with Andrys' ex lovers. I know we're supposed to see and rejoice in the fact that Andrys is no longer a playboy, but did we really need that "women hating women for the benefit of some hot guy" thing in here? I swear there were bits in the series where I could have sworn it was written by man (derogatory). At least Narilka remained unbothered. Presumably moisturised. Very happy and in her lane. Focused on her wedding, as she should be. She gets to live on to be compared to countless fragile things made of porcelain, whether she wants it or not. 2) Freaking Riven Forrest. I was cackling throughout that whole bit. Not only does he get to hunt and terrify people just like his father, he also runs a successful (?) fishing rod business on the side. (I know, I know, hunting supplies in general, the rods just kind of stuck out to me). The fact that the intelligent prey he looks forward to hunting the most is once again a woman (even if it is an abusive, horrible woman) tells us exactly what part the Iezu mother chose to take from the OG Hunter, huh. Which is great for Gerald, but a weird choice on her part?? But dear God the last bit. He keeps a portait of Gerald above his fireplace??? I finally completely lost it at "Here's to you, dad" xDDD 3) The "dark haired youth". Of course he survived. I was suspicious as soon as we didn't actually get to see Andrys kill him. As for the new persona - I suspected who he was, but the moment I was really sure was when Damien started describing him in loving detail. For an entire paragraph. That was half a page long. But the ending. WTF. I could have accepted Gerald's Death, but this? You're telling me after all they went through together, and after he basically just risked his life again by saying hi to Damien in the most cryptic way possible, they just...never talked again?! Nah, in my expert opinion they just met up in the next bathhouse. Also I wanted to see the guy suffer be annoyed a bit more because he can no longer Work to maintain his image. (I'd also have loved to know Geralds criteria for his new body, vain as he is. What was his thought process? "Oh no, the wonderful world of magical horse-breeding is now lost to me! Guess I'll just have to make sure that from now on I have the most majestic ponytail out there!"? Although, come on. He might be willing to risk his life for a horse.) My last words: I enjoyed this series so much more than I ever thought I would, and these idiots now live rent-free in my brain. Also how the f- are we supposed to read these books as an entirely platonic relationship? The most I'll agree to is some weird, slightly cursed QPR. But come on. COME ON. Even if they are both heterosexual (notwithstanding Damiens constant thirsting casual descriptions) they are definitely in love. Or just so deeply obsessed with, and at this point, sort of dependent on each other (Gerlad's words, not mine. sort of) that it makes little to no difference.

I know there's some prequels (?) I think I might check them out sometime.

[coffeedepressionsoup]

Somebody Does Love | MYG - They Meet Again

Pairing - Yoongi x F!reader

Summary - "What is grief, if not love persevering?" Two people are in love but that is not enough because sometimes loving requires courage. This is the one where fate plays games and Sammy plays Cupid. Part 3 of Somebody Does Love.

Series Masterlist

Genre - fluff, strangers to lovers, eventual smut and angst

Word count - 2.2k

Warnings - lil swearing, SMOKING IS INJURIOUS TO HEALTH! nothing else I can think of

Ratings - 13+

Taglist: @majiiisstuff @starlighttaek8 @yoongrace @proudnoona

A/N - I have been in some of the worst times folks. Slipped back into depression. Lost people. Learnt lessons. Still very much in love with our honey boy though. The day I wrote this was one of the very bad days and I am typing this note through my hazy glasses because of these bloody tears. Excuse the typos, and grammar errors. Do not have the energy to proofread. Please be kind. Do like, comment and reblog. Thank you! Here goes nothing.

What was he thinking? Just how drunk was he? Why is he considering going? It’s just a jacket. He has dozens of those. Yoongi nervously bounced his legs as the rest of his body sat very still on the dressing room chair. Two different brushes - no one brush and a sponge - were being lightly tapped against his face now and a pair of hands were insistently tugging at his half-wet hair trying to style it. This was the last look for a magazine cover shoot. Even as he stared straight into the mirror, he thought back to a small cat and their rescuer. 

The next hour and forty minutes passed agonisingly slow. As soon as the director announced wrap, Yoongi was up and halfway out of the satin shirt he was in. By the time he reached the dressing room, he discarded it completely. Soojin, his manager, rushed in after him and asked as he shut the door, “You are really going?”

Yoongi placed the rings and earrings he had taken off on Soojin’s extended hands and nodded as he put his own t-shirt on.

“It is too public, Yoongi-ah…” the older gentleman tried to reason one last time as he saw the other scrub his face hastily off with a few makeup removal wipes.

“How will they know?” the rapper turned around, now having completed his outfit with a cap, a sunglass and a mask.

“They know you by the shape of your head and the size of your shoulder. You really want to risk it?”

“I am not risking anything. You are driving me there,” Yoongi said with a smirk evident in his tone. 

Soojin was left looking at the open door of the dressing room that now had the stylist and a couple of other members of the crew walk in. He handed over the jewellery he was holding from earlier, bid goodbye and jogged off to his car. 

---------------------------------------------------------

You were sat at the cafe sipping on your second latte of the evening. Tapping on your screen to check the time, you let out a yawn. 6:53. Well, maybe you could excuse an hour’s delay. Weekend traffic. Maybe he overslept? As much as you were grateful to Yong-ho, you were also hoping to see his face today. There are not many things you know about him. He has a deep, soothing voice. He smells nice. He is rich enough to casually wear designer jackets. He is kind, helpful and polite. Thoughtful. He is also quite patient. And his eyes. His eyes were beautiful. Solemn but with a shine that could make someone comfortable. 

Comfortable. Why did a stranger you met for half an hour register as comfortable to you? Your phone chimed. A message from Sammy. - Done yet? “Still waiting” - Wtf

- I don’t think he will show up then - I told you it’s a perfect fit for me

- Let me keep it

You chuckled at the series of messages.

“I will wait till 7:30”

- Then meet me directly at Hajoon’s place

- I will put out food for Ash

“Thanks, man. See ya soon” You closed the chat and smiled down at your wallpaper. Ash fast asleep on Woolfie’s back. The kitten and the dog had gotten along exceptionally well. After Woolfie peed on the kitchen floor when baby Ash hissed at him from Sammy’s lap on the first night, there had been no major issues. Ash had tried once to drink from the dog’s bowl the next day and had fallen into it. You fetched her out and dried her up with a hand towel, and the rest of it, Woolfie had licked clean. That night was the first time they napped together.

---------------------------------------------------------

Yoongi sat on the floor near the sofa where Yijeong and Hoseok were playing FC24. Hoseok was leading by 3 goals. Yijeong almost threw his controller at him in frustration, as the rest of the small group around them chuckled and watched the game progress. 

Yoongi also stared at the screen but his mind wandered far away from the game and his friends. His hands absent-mindedly tugged at the inseam of his jeans. 

As Soojin pulled up in front of the cafe earlier that evening, he could feel the sweat drip down his spine inside the air-conditioned car. He stared for a few seconds at the road in front of the car before turning his head towards the cafe you had agreed to meet at. As if it was an attempt to allow himself to catch a breath and just appear cool, just in his own head. A failed attempt at that. 

Even though he turned to look at the cafe from his car seat, he had not expected you to sit right at the window from where he was parked not even 4 whole metres away. Thankfully you were facing sideways, staring at something inside the cafe that Yoongi could not see. If only you were to turn towards the window to your left, your line of vision would directly collide with the tinted window of Yoongi’s car. 

Soojin coughed lightly from beside him. Yoongi only blinked a couple of times before he shut his slightly agape mouth and swallowed the breath that he didn’t know was stuck at his throat. He saw your face move down towards the table, presumably where your phone was. Phone. Why didn’t he exchange numbers back then? He knows why. Well, he could have given Soojin’s number at least. They could arrange for a more discreet pickup. 

Fuck the pickup. Yoongi had half forgotten that this meeting was about picking up the jacket he had lent you to wrap the rescued kitten in. Sure, that was the reason he gave Soojin that morning when he said he had to make a stop after the shoot. But for the whole weekend, his head had been clouded with your face. And your cooing voice at the kitten. And your bright smile as you introduced yourself. And the smell of your perfume and/or your shampoo that encircled you.

Looking forward to Sunday evening, he felt a tightness in his chest and stomach that could have been mistaken for trapped gas. But he knew this feeling all too well. It was anticipation. He has felt it for years ahead of each show or some big live interviews. He would also feel it once for someone he used to date. But that is what is odd. 

Sunday evening was not a date. Hell, he even felt creeped out by the fact that his feelings mirrored something akin to what he would feel like in anticipation of dates. Of course, it wasn’t even his intention to turn a simple transaction meeting into a date. But he had also not expected the sleepless nights that followed meeting you. And the half-written lyrics of a song on his phone. Nor did he expect the feeling of missing somebody he had exchanged less than 20 lines of dialogue with. 

When you had asked how to return his jacket, he almost wanted to say that you didn’t need to. Luckily, even within the first second, his mind deemed it too off-handed of a statement to make and he saw the cafe logo in his peripheral vision. Before he started overthinking and/or asked to exchange numbers, he pointed at the cafe and said, “How about we meet at that cafe on Sunday evening?”

And there he was. Outside the cafe. On Sunday evening. Almost having a panic attack in the safe confines of his car.

He could walk out of the car and into the cafe. He could walk up to you and say hello. He could make small talk for a couple of minutes. He could take back his jacket and thank you politely. He could then walk back out. 

He could. But he didn’t want to.

He did not want to make small talk with you. He wanted to know how you were doing. How your days have been. If you have spent the three nights just as sleeplessly. He also wanted to know how the kitten was doing. How the two of you were getting along. If you had any other pets. If yes, how many. If all of them were getting along. If the pets had another parent. He wanted to ask you so many things and he wanted to hear you say so much.

The cafe was not at its busiest. Even from where Yoongi was, he could see a few empty tables. He drew in a deep breath and placed his fingers lightly on the door, preparing to open it. 

It was at that very moment that you turned to your left, looking out of the cafe through the window you were sitting next to. You glanced down momentarily at what presumably again was your phone and looked back out the window. 6:18. You looked at people milling around the street outside the cafe. 

But to Yoongi, you were looking right at where he was. The concept of his tinted glass windows disappeared from his comprehension as he (seemingly) held your gaze and fluttered one of his hands over Soojin’s arm, urging him to drive off. Alert as ever, the elder man started driving promptly. Yoongi “held” your gaze for as long as he could till he bumped his head against the car window, closing his eyes, inhaling and exhaling in quick succession trying to even his breathing.

He slowly slumped back down against the passenger seat of the car and unclenched the hand that he did not realise until now was clamping down on one of his knees. He stared ahead at the Sunday evening Seoul traffic, shivering a little from feeling some of his sweat dry up. Soojin turned to him at the next red light and said, “Don’t worry, Joon will understand.”

Nothing more was said in the whole car ride up to his friend’s place. Soojin dropped him off and went back to drop the car off at Yoongi’s building before heading to his own place. Yoongi had planned to drive back home with Hobi. They lived in the same building after all. 

Joon will understand. Joon will understand?Joon will not even know that the jacket he gifted his hyung last year was missing unless Yoongi told him so.

He wasn’t thinking about Joon. Nor was he thinking about the jacket. Of course, he wasn’t.

He was thinking about your slightly impatient gaze. A loose bun sitting lightly at the nape of your neck. Your hands that you briefly rested your face on. Your face. You. He was thinking about you. Like he had for more than the past two days. 

He was thinking about where you were now. What you were doing. What you were thinking. What you decided to do with the jacket. If you threw it at a random trash or kept it with you. If you were cursing him. If you were complaining about him to a friend. 

He felt a cramp in his stomach that is usually indicative of nervous diarrhoea. He felt like a dick. For having stood you up, yes. But he was also disappointed at having chickened out. Maybe if he had not waited in his car at all, it would have gone over smoothly. Maybe if you hadn’t looked out at him (his general direction) he would not have freaked out. He tried to tell himself that it was too crowded. He was too tired. And not a coward because of his stupid, random, huge ass crush on Y/N Y/LN. Someone he only met for half an hour. And spent almost all of it watching her bond with a stray kitten by her side.

He looked up as he felt a slight kick on his back. He realised he was staring at a static screen and that his friends had all gathered over the pizzas that had now arrived. He had not noticed when even though he was the closest to the door. He got up and was making his way towards the rest of the group when the doorbell rang.

Yoongi stopped and turned around. He was the closest to the door after all. None of the others seemed to bother reacting to it anyway. He walked to the door and froze as he saw the person on the ring machine. He knew he was supposed to press a single button to unlock the door. He knew which button it was. But his head and his hands refused to cooperate. He stood frozen for a couple of seconds, staring at the screen in front of him, until the bell rang again.

Yoongi thought he heard this ring in a more muffled way as if it was coming from far away. 

It wasn’t until the third ring that someone else left the group, half a slice of pizza stuffed in his mouth and half in his hand walked towards the door, that Yoongi could hear everything normally again. 

“Must be Y/N,” Hajoon called out, patting Yoongi on the back, and reaching over his shoulder to open the door.

After the small beep, you walked in, almost bumping into someone’s chest.