#wrote this in one go in 2 hours
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HEADS UP LADS, MORE KILLUGON TOMORROW AT 3
#writing update#wrote this in one go in 2 hours#its very much just my actual summer life but told through killua and gon lmfaooo#THE MOST SELF INDULGENT FIC EVER. USUALLY I WROTE POETRY ABOUT THIS NOT FIC#cant believe it took me this long to write a farming fic.....#depths' talks#anyway ill post it in the morning gnight lads
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translation of the “true form” conversation is as if hua cheng gave xie lian a fake name when they first met, so when xie lian asks “so what’s your real name” and hua cheng panics it’s bc he thinks xie lian is asking for his dead name but actually xie lian was just asking for his real chosen name because he wants to fuck him
#tgcf#hualian#funnies#trans hua cheng#from the drafts#ok this one is hilarious#to me#first one out the door - 16 more to go#the first one to make it out of the drafts!!!! i have spent like 2 hours. and all i have are. more drafts.#i think i wrote this one and it prompted me to write a more serious one about the context of the convo that i did post#im sleep deprived i can’t tell if this is funny to anyone else
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cough hack wheeze who wants a teeny tiny fantasy au snippet with uhhhh laughingstock Tension. it's like... half a scene! unedited & out of context As Is Tradition
~
“Nothin’ much. I think I’ll poke around nearby towns, shake down some travelers - see what falls into my paws.”
“I’m not sure that’s such a good idea, Barn,” Howdy says. He sweeps aggressively, spreading dirt more than gathering it into the usual neat piles. “Who knows if those ne'er-do-wells are still roaming around the woods - if you and Ed couldn’t take them, what makes you think you could alone? Or- or! What if you stumble across those cultists? I hate to think of you stuck in an ambush with no help coming, knowing fully well that-”
A large paw slips the broom out of his grip and sets it to the side, and Howdy stammers to a stop as Barnaby crowds him against the bar with a soft, “Howdy.”
Howdy swallows hard, bracketed on each side by strong blue arms. The look Barnaby fixes him with dries up his well of words and bristles his fuzz. Howdy’s heart hammers against his ribs. He can feel Barnaby’s body heat, and it’s lighting his blood on fire.
“I’m not gonna be reckless, if that’s what you’re worried about,” Barnaby says. He barely needs to speak louder than a whisper for Howdy to hear him loud and clear. He smells like sweet smoke. “The other day was a one time deal, cross my heart. But, if it’ll make you feel better, I’ll take someone with me. I’m sure Jules is itchin’ to get outta town.”
“What would really make me feel better is if you stay,” Howdy blurts, just barely reining in the with me. He tenses, knowing that he’s toeing a dangerous line. One wrong word, and he’ll make the unspoken spoken - but the stress drains out of him as Barn’s eyes go soft. Perhaps that wouldn’t be so bad. Of course there’s no reason to worry, not about this, not with him. There never has been.
“You know I can’t do that,” Barnaby murmurs. “Not yet.”
Howdy doesn’t need to say that he knows. Not for the first time and with any luck, not for the last, it clicks in his mind that they’re on the same page - he doesn’t need to be a telepath to understand the thoughts behind Barnaby’s dark eyes.
Barnaby says it anyway. “I gotta get him back. I can’t… there’s no room for anythin’ else right now.”
Howdy sighs through his nose and slumps against the counter digging into the small of his back. He nods and adjusts the lapels of Barnaby’s vest. His fingers ghost over soft blue, and Barnaby doesn’t flinch at the contact. If anything, he leans the barest millimeter into it. His gaze burns into Howdy’s, even if they aren’t meeting at the moment, but it isn’t a bad feeling. Quite the opposite, actually.
“Well,” Howdy says in a low voice, “if you find a good lead, send for the rest of us. I’ll be there as fast as my four legs can scamper.”
Barnaby smirks. “Even if you need to take a boat?”
“Even so, Barn.”
The smirk slides into something that isn’t a frown, but isn’t a smile. It’s too soft for a grimace, but too intense for simple recognition. Barnaby seems to sway forward, and Howdy is sorely tempted to meet him halfway.
But Barnaby’s claw taps the counter, and he pulls away before anyone’s mind can be made up. Howdy’s hands slip from his lapels, brushing against fur as they fall and knuckles skimming over the smooth, fresh scar cutting across Barnaby’s belly.
“I’ll be back before you know it,” Barnaby says, his eyes crinkling at the corners. He squeezes Howdy’s shoulder and then his back is turned, and he’s leaving. All Howdy can do is watch.
And call out after him, “Your table will be open and waiting for you.”
Barnaby pauses in the doorway and looks over his shoulder at Howdy, and his grin is so full of affection that Howdy may just burst.
“With a free pint?” he asks.
“Hey now, don’t push your luck pal.”
Barnaby bursts out laughing, and Howdy can hear it even after the door thuds closed.
#clawing and sobbing and- no. no#im normal. im so normal i swear#yk on a related tangent. i keep wanting to go to my sleep but spotify keeps playing bangers#all of my Lore songs... the animatics in my head... i dont want to not listen!#so i thought hey. might as well offer Yet Another Snippet!#i have many these days!#i almost posted the human au carnival snippet but uhhhh this one won out. i wrote it like. two hours ago#im sorry if it lacks some Personality or if theres blatant Mistakes#im tired! i meant to be asleep two hours ago! its 2 am!#snippets from the bog#laughingstock#wh fantasy au#its not shown in this tidbit#but barnaby has his pack and it contains Not Only Wormie! but also Puppet Wally!#barnaby: i gotta find wally 🥺#honey... you have had him the whole time... kiss your caterpillar....#the. the tall one. not the teeny worm.#well. the teeny worm too but she just gets a little kisth on her tiny face.#the tall caterpillar would get uhhhh a lil more than that id expect. lotsa sugar yk yk#im. gonna go sleep#these two will be my nightly bedtime story as i drift away...#and hopefully ill wake up early enough to find the christmas lights before The Stream#and maybe crochet a few more rows.... read a couple more chapters...#i just misspelled read as red i need to be Unconchus
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Zero Day (2002)
#movies film cinema#zero day#ben coccio#I actually talked to the director on Facebook super nice guy and he told#me a lot about the filmmaking process and even helped me with tips on directing non-actors and new actors#I remember him telling me to always be supportive and tell your new actors they're doing a good job even if they aren't in the first take#cause you can instill confidence and still reshape and change their choices and mistakes later#Sometimes I'd message him for advice when I was running into problems on some of my early projects#he told me once ''did ya choose to collaborate with this actor cause you were lonely or you guys had passion and chemistry''#“collaborating is like a relationship” and he was so right#there's nothing worse than working with people you disdain cause there's no communication and no trust.#he told me how he wrote the first couple of drafts of Place Beyond the Pines but his take on the 3rd act wasn't clicking for the director#so he took the script and went and had another writer rewrite the 3rd act but he liked the process cause he learned a lot and still got pai#but I'd still like to see Ben Coccio's take on Place Beyond The Pines he says the 1st and 2nd act are mostly unchanged#Ryan Gosling's scenes are still mostly the same he said but he couldn't tell me too much cause of the NDA he signed#The bloopers of Zero Day are hilarious his tip he gave me about being supportive#“This is actually great but can we-” and Cal interrupts him “He says that no matter what if you're doing good or bad!” and everyone lols#I hope I can make it and ask him to collab with me on a script#He's such a nice dude compared to the harrowing film he made.#I wish there was BTS but he had only one tape to film on and this was made when digital camcorders were infants#I think he had only one 2 hour tape that's how low budget#The bloopers is just Cal or Andre secretly filming and Ben getting annoyed “Is it recording?” and Cal going “Nah..."#Cal is such a funny guy IRL I wanna see him act more cause he's so good. He was so great at playing a sadistic psychopath in this.#the final shooting is so harrowing and disturbing#I told Ben he srsly gut punched me/disturbed me and this is what made him really open up.
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And here is the bull himself >:)
+ lore notes
I was like, ah I should make the shadow something interesting, and then I'm like GIVE HIM BULL HORNS???? OKAY SURE !!!!! I'm glad such thoughts can strike at 7 in the morning....thanks brain. But hehehe I'm glad bcs now this matches up super well with the Nando one!
New ship dynamic: who's the bull and who's the matador :)
I think, in this AU, Fernando is generally pretty fond of Seb when he first meets him. Like "ah yes my very own protégé, very nice, I shall mold him in my image." But then Seb starts veering off that course. Bullfighting is all about being dramatic, but Seb maybe has a bit too much(🤏) flair for the dramatic. This escalation starts while he's still Fernando's assistant but he keeps it generally at bay. But god when he becomes a matador himself, he's just off the rails insane.
Bullfighting, to me, is a sport about reckless endangerment of one's self in the pursuit of drama and performance(its literally described as a tragedy in three acts.) But Fernando thinks Seb endangers himself *too* much, not because he cares or anything, but he's making a mockery of the sport!! Especially when Seb starts doing that bull hand symbol(seen above), Fernando just keeps become more enraged with him, not anything to do with the fact that Seb is threatening his records and threatening his own wellbeing, nah of course not.
Seb's gesture is making a mockery of the sport, he's disrespecting the culture, the very nature of it, blah blah blah. Jenson once asks Fernando, after noticing him seething while watching Seb do his gesture, "Which bull are you really trying to defeat?" One could also describe Fernando and Seb's relationship as a "tragedy with three acts."
Anyways Fernando gets very tied up with this rivalry. Even after suffering a severe injury(I have yet to decide, but y'know mchonda electrocution core), he quickly returns to the sport, loath to let Seb get any more headway. And then Seb gets injured, poor little sweet Seb, and neither of them can handle it. Though I already covered this in my prev lore post 🤭 and I think I put it pretty viscerally there so!! I digress.
They're both matadors, but the bull itself is not the only bull Fernando wants to conquer. Conquer as in death? Hm.
#i love matador au all my homies love matador au#<- its a lot of fun for me to draw and easy to have ref for :) so its like my little comfort drawings#even tho i want to sob every time i write any of the lore down bcs it is so </3#ah i just like how visceral it is ig#f1 is a dangerous sport but bullfighting is just. such another level of maniacs 😭#ive talked abt this a lot w cofi lmao its just super interesting to me. just the whole mentality and display and culture of it#also just: trajes de luces go brrrrrrr#ah one day ill draw both of them in green suits 🤭🤭#i had a chibi art of this au i was working on bcs i didnt have mental energy for a full thing#or at least i THOUGHT so#ive had the refs for this since 2 wks and im like YOU WILL FINISH THIS bcs i rly liked the pose 😭#so then i just drew for like 5 hours straight. yknow as one does#and wrote this post at uh. 8 am. normal time for one to be drawing and writing. as one does.#WELL ANYWAYS PLEASE ENJOY MATADOR SEB#this au grips me the throat 😭 i rly enjoy it 😭#i have a lot of thoughts ab the au lore itself but also drawing these is very no thoughts head empty <3#also god side note. pink stockinks. i hated the idea of them at first. but now im like hehe hot pink time 🥰🥰#its crazy how it doesnt clash that much??? i thought it would ruin the outfit but ah they suit everything p well#f1#formula 1#sebastian vettel#catie.art.#matador au
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Just saw this comment on a story posted a month ago.
*cries in Eddie Munson Solo Series no one wanted to read, interact with or request for*
No shade to the person that commented this on their own fic if you recognize it. It's not their fault. I'm not mad at them. More crying in the tags.
#and no I didn't tag the solo series like I normally would because it's not about THAT. It's not about trying to get people to read it#It was just really ouchie to see the same concept I wrote 2 years ago get triple the notes in ONE MONTH.#and double the notes of my solo series masterlist in general in one month vs 2 years of my stories sitting there rotting#Then I see people saying they need more solo Eddie and I'm just here like my dudes I begged for requests. BEGGED. But bc I wasn't#/have never been a popular writer people don't want it from ME. It's like omg we want THIS but not like that. Not from you.#Can't help but let it get you down when nothing has changed in 2 years. It's not like I worked my way up and have the interaction now#that every other blog I used to commiserate with back in the day is getting currently. Fandom isn't a competition but it's not fair either#and I really struggle with that a lot of the time#Also yes I will concede I should be happy with the notes on the solo series because they are the highest of all the work on my page but#they're still nothing compared to what some people have just hours after posting a new story.#I saw someone complaining the other day that there are less new stories in the fandom than ever 1. That's simply not true. 2. Even if it wa#can you blame writers for giving up when readers are checking the same popular blogs over again or reading the same 5 tropes the same#2 pairings over and over. The same series? Over and over. Ignoring everything else and then complaining that their faves don't post enough?#That the popular writer with the incredible series (that rightfully deserves interaction) hasn't posted a new dad!eddie or rockstar!eddie#drabble in ages meanwhile there are writes out there pouring their souls into dad!eddie and no one reads it. There is so much rockstar Eddi#smut out there that it could sustain a brand new reader for an entire year before they needed a new fic#Idk man. I'm just feeling so defeated. I write for fun now. But there was a point in time where I desperately tried to build a platform by#offering requests and writing a lot of things I would not otherwise write to try and gain traction on my page and every time I see another#food fucking fic get hundreds of notes I get so sad that I wrote that stupid Melon fic because I had people in my life that told me#they would be excited to read it and for what? One of them still talks to me. The others moved on so fast. Most didn't even reblog it.#Some of them have since written their own food fucking fics that got triple the notes of my OG. Again. No shade to them. I don't own the#concept. It's just disheartening and fucking sad above all else. How hard I tried to get people to LIKE me and my stories. 😂#Just sad hours in general tonight my guys. Going to go and pour the bad feelings into Aftermath and then maybe make a bad life choice and#pour all my savings into an ipad#YES I KNOW first world problems. I know. That's why I try not to talk about it bc it seems so petty considering the state of the world#But you can't help what gets you down#EMMs Journal#EMM's Journal
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Chat how soon is too soon to return to a job after being thrown a goodbye celebration under the pretense of you moving across the country 🫣
#TO BE FAIR I DID THINK I WAS MOVING AT THE TIME#I hate hate my new job#and I only got it for the pay#but my check after working 2 4.5 hr shifts was $50#which does NOT meet the $300 a week I told them I wanted to make in my application#nor the $15 an hour I asked for and was told I would make an avg of 13-18#in theory I’ll make more after I’m done training#but even then it’s only $8 plus a percentage of sales#and so far it has been dead all the days I’ve worked#in theory I could work up to being a server#but that would still be more training less money#and I don’t even think I would like being a server#raises the question of should you keep a job you don’t like for the moeny#I can’t stay a host though I don’t know if it’s worth staying#I spend all day thinking abt my old job and how much better it was in every way#and I want to go back but they made a big deal abt me leaving#and it would feel really awkward to go back would it be too awkward#honestly I should just bite the bullet#I could get past the awkwardness and return to a job I like and am comfortable at#and know id make enough money at :|#like gen how weird would it be to go back after they wrote me a farewell card and bought me cookies —#kestrel calls#chitter chatter#text post#PLUS#new job scheduled me one shift next week ???#what the helllllllll#I’m not staying there I’m not I’m looking elsewhere
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I’m just gonna write a little thing! A little thought for Bloom, nothing too intense, just so I don’t forget it!
1000 words later? Whoops
Writing below the cut, major spoilers for the end of Heart of Thorns and implied End of Dragons spoilers but nothing explicit from EoD :]
Bloom
“Kill me, Commander.” Trahearne could hear his own voice tremble, as horror overtook his dear friend’s face. Around them all, their friends— Rytlock, Caithe, Canach, Marjory, Braham— were exhausted. Worn thin by the fight against the jungle dragon, both physical and within the Dream.
“What? No! Mordremoth is dead. We destroyed its mind from the inside.” The commander protested, their fingers curled around the hilt of Caladbolg.
“But I still hear its voice.” Trahearne looked down at his hands, twisted and blighted as they were. His body was not his— he was corrupted. It was only cruel fate that he had kept his mind this long. Or perhaps something more sinister.
“Mordremoth is alive. One last hateful vestige… a terrible seed, planted deep in my mind.”
Trahearne’s hands curled into fist, as he took a deep steadying breath.
“You must kill me, Commander, before that seed grows. Before… before Mordremoth reclaims what it has lost.”
He reached out now, hands on his friend’s shoulders. The tears streaming down their face broke his heart. He did not want this. He didn’t want to hurt them, to see them suffer so.
Trahearne wished there was another way.
“What is left of me can’t survive on its own, my friend.” He croaked, and felt the Commander tremble beneath his hands. Were they always so small?
“Strike now or—“
Against his will, a rage rose up. A sick bile that boiled in his stomach and burned through his chest as his mind lurched.
Through his mouth, Mordremoth spoke.
“I am the future! I am this world! You cannot destroy me!” The dragon roared, hands tightening around the commander.
“Run while you can!” It took everything he had left to force his fingers to uncurl, to release the commander even as the dragon wanted to tear them to shreds to be remade anew.
Caladbolg flashed in the corner of his eye.
“No!” The commander yelled. Strike true my friend! Trahearne wanted to yell. But he couldn’t, and his mind went dark.
There was no great explosion. There was no dying scream.
If you asked those present what happened, none of them gave any concrete answer.
Canach hesitated to answer, but would confirm that Mordremoth was no longer hounding his mind, or any of the sylvari.
All Rytlock would say was that the confrontation wasn’t pretty.
Caithe mourned Trahearne, in her quiet and melancholic manner, and asked not to push the matter further.
Braham would scowl, shake his head, and shove his way past, unwilling or perhaps unable to describe that final blow.
Marjory Delaqua, normally so elegant and clever with her words, who could see the twists of a plot before anyone else— when she was asked, she could only shake her head and reply ‘I don’t know’.
The Commander didn’t answer at all, because no one was able to find them to ask.
Eventually, researchers at the newly established lab of Rata Novus confirmed what the entire world held its breath to hear.
Mordremoth was dead. He had to be, to explain the slow steady trickle of magic escaping the jungle, supposedly as the dragon… decayed wasn’t the right word, but it conveyed the idea well enough. It was a slow death, they said, not quite the explosive reaction from Zhaitan, who had gorged itself on magic before its death, but a gradual decay. It changed things, about magic, about how the people of Tyria and the soon to be established Dragon’s Watch understood the flow of magic around and through the Elder Dragons. But it was dead.
It had to be.
He woke up. His body ached, as it always did, as he woke. A consequence of being too bigsmall. He stirred slowly, limbs stretching out and tail dragging behind. He had buried himself beneath massive vines this time, the weight of them both familiar and restricting. These conflicting sensations, the constant disagreement with himself… it was the only thing he could rely on. Even his name escaped his memory, although he could hear whispers of it on the edges of his mind.
Traherdremaneth.
It didn’t matter, really.
He moved slowly, not truly wanting to rise, but knowing he must.
He was something in between, and there was no stillness for him. No place of his own.
His one companion, if you could call it that, would be upon him soon. A dogged purserer, both a thorn in his side and a trusted ally, trailed behind him. For a time he thought they left him— and the feelings that had wrought left him stationary in a deep cave for nearly a week before they had reappeared.
He didn’t want them close, he knew that much, but they were one of the few things he had, a consistency. He couldn’t see them well, not with the distance between them, but he could always make out the broken blade at their hip. The one that made the scar across his chest ache.
He wondered what would happen if he let them get closer. Would they strike? Would they know him?
They were his enemyfriend. What would they make of him? Caution kept him at a distance from them.
The longer he was awake, the more memories he could half-remember.
The Orrian landscape stretches out before him and it reeks of his sibling, twisting beneath the dirt. The undead don’t notice him, not yet, and he can take a moment to look closer at the coral. It was neither alive nor dead. Not unlike himself and yet so different to him or anything he had ever encountered before.
He missed his siblings, their quiet talks among the then empty roots, among safe coils with their constant presence around him. They were too distant to feel or simply gone now and it unnerved him. This was wrong. Perhaps they could help him make it right.
There was one other thing, other than his sort-of companion and his unsteady roiling mind, that remained constant. And this was the true constant. A steady beacon, that he could not see or hear, but simply felt in a way that he could not describe. A magnetic sort of pull that had him orbiting closer and closer.
It drew him in, out of the depths and dark underbelly of the jungle and the cave systems, towards the strange golden stones, the elegant walls meant to keep out creatures that wished to destroy the beacon. He was not welcome there, not yet, even though he meant no harm. He just needed to be closer.
He didn’t know how he knew that. He just knew it.
#gw2#guild wars 2#batsy writing#bloom my beloved#i should sort out a proper tag for him#the bloom dragon feels too generic but I hesitate to tag it trahearne#even tho technically it is#in a sense#gw2 spoilers#should include that one#im on mobile and i wrote this on google docs in uhhh#two hours? two and half? give or take#tumblr doesnt like my formatting at ALL lmao#i will tag this but with#trahearne#gw2 trahearne#tho bc he does technically appear as himself. briefly#during the painful bit#that dialogue i did go to the wiki for to make sure i remembered it right#so thats. anet dialogue w some batsy flavor for the actions#i tried to keep the commander vague bc i still have no idea who bloom has as a commander#and if ppl wanna imagine their commander w bloom in the meantime then go for it#i used dyraoi for that one drawing but she doesnt fit bloom as well as i hoped#so he continues to just have vague commander shape#which#is a fun challenge#to write without giving too much detail about them#this could be so much longer but i both reached the end of my train of thought and havent decided how i want to handle some stuff#me? rambling in my own tags? more likely than you think#if youve made it this far in the tags hi
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hello you will now all refer to me as that guy who almost got pulled into the shark exhibit by a full grown sand tiger shark on TWO SEPARATE OCCASIONS today
#i scraped up my whole elbow catching myself on the wall lmaoooooo#ive been running off that adrenaline for the last 2 hours it was only me and one other person today#and we had sooooo many electricity issues this morning im so tired#AND IM ON CALL. WHICH MEANS I HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FURTHER ELECTRICAL ISSUES EVEN AFTER I GET HOME TONIGHT#anyway. my life almost ended in a feeding frenzy. what an awesome way to go out#thats a lie they wouldnt eat me. i wouldve drowned from my goddamn chest waders filling up with water#how was everyone elses day today <3#i was writing up my coverage email for the weekend and no joke almost wrote “le froglette” when i mentioned moving him to a new tank 🤦
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Currently obsessively thinking about a silent hill from Mary's perspective. Starting in the hospital, the nurses replaced with doctors, faces blacked out except for white shiny gnashing teeth. She only has in her pockets a note written on hotel stationary that says I'm Sorry.
Escaping and meeting a young man, cute and a lil awkward, who says you look a lot like his girlfriend Maria, and shes missing too? Can we look for her together?
Hes... sweet, a bit quiet. He gets very close to Mary often, pushes her boundaries, but this is all weird and strange and maybe hes just scared. When she mentions it, however, he makes a rude remark abt Just Wanting To Help Her but backs off.
They get seperated when the Red Pyramid Thing, unchanged in this version, comes and attacks them both, but chooses to persue him.
Laura is still there, and when Mary and her meet they cling together. She talks about an awful, ugly man she met earlier, and to watch out for him. She helps guide Mary through a maze like area before the Other World sets in and separates them.
The monsters in Mary's Silent Hill are almost all larger then her, and many masculine in appearance. They attack her head, try and choke her. Certain ones cough and gasp, arms thrashing wildly and thrashing on the floor when knocked down. Some seems to have exposed, black lungs that stutter to breathe. If Angela and Eddie are the same in this version, then their boss fights remain the same. The Abstract Daddy just as horrifying to Mary as it is to Angela.
Every reunion with the man, hes different. Less nice, more haunted looking. He starts to call her Maria, and barely acknowledges her if she corrects him. Following his advice leads to darker and more dangerous areas. The Red Pyramid keeps coming and chasing him away, but shes always collateral damage when that happens.
Eventually, she makes it to the hotel. Hes waiting for her in the hotel room, haggard, almost unrecognizable from the man he was when they first met. He has a monologue about how she's been sick, and hes been trying his best to be there for her. She doesnt understand, she doesnt know him, shes NOT Maria! She never will be. She starts coughing.
He makes to leave but at the last second turns, and hes a monster now. Large, fleshy, imposing, always trying to suffocate her under thick hands. Upon his defeat, two Red Pyramids arrive and stab at the dying thing over and over until finally impaling themselves.
There are different endings still. She remembers her disease, and her murder, in most of them. In the best ending she leaves the town with Laura, likely still ill, but alive again. In one of the worst, she wakes up in the trunk of a car, as water begins seeping in.
#silent hill#silent hill 2#i have a few other ideas for this but wasnt sure how to work them into the prosey wording this took#i think Angela's story goes the same way but instead of James being flustered and kinda unsympathetic#Mary has kind words but no way to help#and their final meeting isnt as hostile as her and james but its still bitter#gameplay wise i also am imagining James Constantly being up on Mary and like pushing her into monsters while trying to atk them himself#instead of always trailing behind#Mary doesnt get her own PH bc hes a punisher and she doesnt need punishing (its why Angela doesnt have one but Eddie does yknow)#but im tempted to say she gets a prefinal boss that is Maria in some way#not like how we know maria but im thinking a mix of the Mannequins and the Flesh Lips enemies#its got the moth/butterfly motif still too#i do have a kinda clear scene in my head#of late in the game leading to this fight Mary has just shaken off James again and hes fully in the Youre Maria :) mental state#and she passes a mirror in a hall and sees herself as Maria. she turns back to look again and Maria smiles before reaching through and#grabs Mary by the throat as she transforms into the boss#crazee talk#i wrote this over the course of an hour and a half directly after waking up today#what was going on my sleep brain#took all day to post it bc i wanted to edit the tags on desktop and i had stuff to do
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Got some solo Mountain for the soul, getting off on intimate memories of the ones he loves <3
WC: 1,046; Explicit/Mature
With the gentlest slide down his arm, Swiss had looked up at him with such pretty and bright mismatched eyes, it left Mountain stuttering and flushing that he was surprised Dew made no move to taunt him.
And now here he laid in bed unable to stop thinking about it. The way that small hint of intimacy sent a shiver down his spine was tearing his mind apart – he couldn't help the way his hips began grinding down against his mattress.
Mountain doesn't know what came over him. It was nothing new. He's been intimate with Swiss countless of times and yet, such a minor act has his body alight. His body, sensitive and aware, and mind, full of wants and desires.
Images of Swiss flash through Mountain's mind as he bites down onto a pillow, claws digging into its sides. His hips gave little thrust down upon the mattress – a small whine escaping him as the friction against his cockhead sent a shock down his body.
Images of Swiss sprawled out on an armchair, looking ravishing as he waited for someone to decide they were going to devour him. Swiss on Mountain's own bed, restricted and gagged, waiting for his reward after behaving so well. Swiss above him, wicked smile, ready to pull Mountain apart. But also, Swiss before him, holding Mountain in his arms and whispering sweet nothings to him as they learned to love each other for the hundredth time.
But it didn't stop there. Cirrus and Sunshine appeared next in his mind. The pretty fucked out face Swiss made accompanied with Sunshine's cock down his throat and Cirrus burying her strap in his ass. The delicious way Cirrus' tits pressed against Swiss' back as Sunshine held their faces in her beautiful hands. Sunshine and Cirrus looked so graceful and vibrant, even when fucking Swiss out of his mind, Mountain knowing he was next.
That memory itself could have been more than enough to take Mountain over the edge, but his mind didn't stop there.
Mountain turned so he laid on his back as a memory of Cumulus and Aether filled the foreground of his mind. Both lovers stretched out so pretty before him. Their soft hands roaming their own bodies as they gazed lovingly at one another. He asked to love them that day, to worship them, to have his way with them all night long. They were more than happy to oblige his request.
Aa he stroked his cock, back arching off the bed with little moans, hand tangled into his hair, Mountain remembered. Remembered what it was like to have his face buried in Lus' tits as he fucked her at a slow, agonizing pace that left him in tears as he focused on making her cum first. Remembered how Aether requested to lick up his tears before he let Mountain fuck his tits like he so badly craved.
Even now, Mountain felt that wetness stinging in his eyes once again as strained gasps worked their way up his throat. Mountain let out an airy laugh at the memory of what it was like to be held by them as he came down from his orgasm. Gentle caresses and kisses all along his body as he laid limp between them.
A new memory flashed into his mind. The side of Mountain's face pressed firmly into the pillow below him with a loud groan as a memory of Dew came into view. Dew on his knees before him in all his magnificence with his glowing, long hair doing what it could to cover his bare chest and back. Just barely hiding the dark marks trailing from his neck to his ribs. Shiny muzzle Mountain picked out just for him adorning Dewdrop's soft features, accentuating his droopy, hazy eyes. The goodest boy he could ask for, waiting and praying for Mountain to give him what he wanted.
A quiet, "Dew…" left Mountain as his desire grew, and suddenly a different memory took over his mind. Rolling onto his side, Mountain rutted into his hand, claws tearing at his pillow at the image of Zephyr roughly fucking into Rain. That afternoon Mountain laid parallel to his water ghoul, waiting for his turn to be sent into another world by Zephyr. Mountain remembered the pretty endless sounds Rain made as Zephyr took care of him. Remembered how Zephyr's beautiful striking hair fell out of its binds to adorn both their faces.
An unexpected memory of Cowbell and Ifrit hit him next. Mountain had almost forgotten the images that flashed into his mind as the three were high off their asses that day. Ifrit, chuckling with the widest grin as he held Cowbell's head down onto his cock, head rolling back and leaving his neck exposed perfectly for Mountain to love on. Clumsily, he had moved up to do exactly that, moaning against Ifrit’s neck as Cowbell moved its mouth onto his cock instead. From the corner of his eye, Mountain remembered being able to see the desperate little humps Cowbell did against Ifrit’s leg, and Ifrit surely rewarded Bell for its patience afterwards. It had been a wonderful sight to see for Mountain's then hazy brain.
Mountain was so close now. He rolled onto his belly once again, but this time he slid back so his hips were in the air, legs spread as he continued to stroke himself, eyes rolling back as he did.
The last image he saw as his orgasm hit with a shout, was Papa's hand reaching out to caress his face. Moments after Mountain had begged him to cum on his face. Mountain whimpered at the memory and overstimulation on his cock, but he couldn't stop touching himself. Satisfied yet desiring so much more. He needed more. He needed them.
His hand came to a halt and Mountain rolled onto his back. He gazed up at the ceiling where Swiss and Sunshine had adorn it with glow in the dark stars. An unexpected laughter took over him as he, for the thousandth time possibly, realized just how gone he was for his beloved pack. He needed them, and he surely planned to let them know just how much he craved them as soon as he could roll himself out of his own sticky mess.
#birthday present to ✨️myself✨️#i wrote this in less than 2 hours i think? i haven't written or read any fanfiction in a long time 💀💀#made a temporary comeback to reward myself for finishing up a summer class before the next one starts and for my birthday today!#anyways. gonna go knock out after writing this and finishing my final project this morning lmao#I ALSO DIDN'T EDIT SO UH#mountain ghoul#nameless ghouls#ghost band fanfic#zephyinks
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Ever hate it when you start to get brain rot of a character you love except there's 3 seconds of screentime for them, literally one piece of official art ; and when you ship them with another character that would have a silly / cute dynamic with them there's 6 fanfics of them together on ao3 with an added up amount of words of 13k and when looking around the Internet for art of this character, 1/3 of each art piece is with another character you dislike the ship of and, it mainly being created because the creator drew them together a small amount of times in some sketchs so you have to rant about them to your friends who say 'L' and 'insert ship better' causing me to rave like a lunatic to friends not even online making my rants look like akin to an insane persons ramblings in their diary which showcase their downfall and insanity.
#baxtious#I'm talking about baxtious#Character at the start being baxter#I'm not going to use wattpad#I wrote this whilst listening to an hour loop of that one part against the kitchen floor by will wood our great leader#I will cry and go insane if baxter isn't in season 2#I dont have much friends#poe bsd kinnie honestly
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When proofreading the journal (on friday night) i commented on one slightly sexist and outdated term to be replaced by a neutral and more inclusive term. I've been having nightmares because of this
#like I'm sure no one is even gonna read my comments at all#i usually tend to get ignored#but in my mind my colleague/superior/ the journalist who wrote that article is now considering me his arch enemy#and i will be branded as the difficult female newbie who's incompetent but has the audacity to comment on his word choice#because this is journalism and the texts need to be a bit provocative but actually this term is obviously in no way negatively connotated#and he gets to choose the words for the texts he writes and i should shut my stupid mouth#and leave him alone#and obviously everyone is going to agree with him because who the fuck cares about gender equality or inclusive language#i simply have no idea how this business works and all the urologists will hate us if the texts are more carefully formulated#this has been on my mind since friday night so much that i was so close to go online again and delete the comment#but i keep thinking i shouldn't let my fear of being branded as difficult and petty prevent me from giving my opinion on this?#because it Is bothering me quite a bit and i simply made a suggestion. if he decides to call me out for it i can explain#my reasoning and tell him to ignore it of he doesn't like it. it's not my journal after all so i merely make suggestions#ugh i hate work#i also considered working another 2 hours today so tomorrow will go more smoothly but i don't wanna work on the weekend#i should set boundaries where i can or else I'll end up burned out again just like it was with university#i need to stop giving a fuck about work anyway#i don't get paid enough to care lol#void screams
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I’m again thinking about like a rebellious emotional vampire who goes fine I’ll deal with needing to get negative emotions my way, and is just a fantastic therapist with absurd and super flexible hours for vampires to use without having to go oh fuck I have to explain why I’m going to therapy only at night and he whole vampirism thing
like it’d only happen in canon to help nandor out of his perrenial depression funk, like if it comes up ever, it would be very fun and I would once again point like the Leonardo DiCaprio meme and say look! It’s psychology! Occurring! I study that!
#wwdits spoilers#I can fuckin SEE it#the vampire therapist passing a box of tissues eyes glowing blue from the sheer amount of sadness#is it ethical therapy no#I’m just saying most vampires need therapy#and emotional vamps need food and some may feel bad about faking pity#not evie she’s a girlboss I’m just thinking about it again since she came back for one episode to uphold bureaucracy#I nearly wrote the fic but didn’t like 2 years ago or so#so y’all get this now or again as my brain soups around going mmmmm psychology………..#for hours on end while I do not watch GO season 2 I have seen what occurs and I know my romcom heart cannot take it#regardless of circumstances#I can put therapy into my fiction and media#it would help so many characters and so many arguments get solved#wwdits
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today has instilled a new zest for life in me. oh god things could be so so much worse!
#was hanging out w friends yesterday and my one friend got pulled over going through a toll booth near my house#turns out his registration was expired and he didnt know and they towed him car#he had the cops take him to my house bc the dmv doesnt take walk ins. stayed over. we took him to the dmv in the morning#2 hours in there to fix the registration + another 2 to get his parents to transfer him money for it#go to the towing place and they cant release his car bc theyre a private company that works for the state#(he was pulled over on the parkway so it was a state trooper)#and they need a release form from the state police who are located at an unmarked building off the side of the parkway#like its not on the map#we go. finally get an officer to come out. officer comes out. says he cant give him the form bc his license is suspended#because he got a ticket 1 year ago and had a court date but he had just moved and the courts had his old address#so he never received his summons and the court just assumed he was ditching them#PLUS. once the state trooper found the actual ticket my friend remembered that he had gotten pulled over bc his phone#was in his hand but he was using it as a GPS bc he was new to the area. and the cop wrote up a ticket but never gave him one#so he didnt even know he had been written up#so now his car is stuck in south jersey. he has to take the train up to north jersey. beg the brooklyn courts to let him appear online#and then somehow get back down here and get the paperwork to get his car. meanwhile its also $250 every day the tow people have the car#i just cant believe how this didnt all happen at once. how it was quite literally one thing after the next in a straight line of disaster
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can we just take a moment and appreciate the fact that young puts the weapon down to use his fists, it needs to be physical for him, he needs to feel rush when he hurts him, and I love it, I am here for this, I am here for these two being wild about each other, it's just beautiful
if he wanted to kill rush, he would just shoot him, he does not want to kill him like 'kill him', but he wants to beat him so much, he wants to feel rush's life in his hands, that way he can have some control over whatever they have going on between each other, this 'need to beat you' mode is so good, I absolutely enjoy it
yeah, there are better things to enjoy in life than watching how two idiots on screen would fight, but there are some sports where people pay to watch those things, I just chose to enjoy it between a space drama, mostly caused by one of the jerks above
I am trying to imagine what their relationship would be like if the show was not cancelled, and they did become more, um, 'friendly' I guess I can call it friendly, less physical, which obviously sucks for me, I enjoy them getting physical. I think even when they are on good terms young would not be able to not be aggressive with rush in some ways. it would not be life threatening like in this scene, and rush would know it, but their arguments would be heated, and I think young would use his strength, maybe pushing rush to a wall a little too hard, stopping him by holding his arm a little too hard, I think whenever young would realize he is losing an argument he would try to get into rush's personal space, it's the way he shows his strength, he can't win with his mind, but he can win by force. he knows it, but also, I think he would not do it intentionally all the time, with rush it's always unintentional, heated and brought to the point where you can't control yourself and you give into it and act on impulse.
I think it would start with less and less aggression in fight, and more enjoy outdoing\outsmarting the other one. like playing a chess, like, you can be smart as rush and win, but you also need to be a good strategist, so young does have something to offer here, he can challenge rush, and I think he has the chance to win a game. so they would be around each other as if they play a chess. the more they would play this game the more they would want to win, they would make the other one learn some new tricks to win, I think they would make each other better by learning thing or two from one another, and by the end of the show they would actually enjoy having an argument, having a talk, maybe one day they would just talk, you know, like normal people, and it would not end up with one accusing the other one in sabotaging something, or lying, or whatever.
rush just crawling away, and young trying so hard to not finish what he started, you can see he wants to beat him more, but he is tired of this as well. have you seen a man who is so tired by trying so hard to not kill smb? love it
they are trying so hard to control things, but they can't even control themselves
as if it is not about control and power for you, man. when he offers rush to work together in 'darkness' he looses his shit and the talk goes the wrong way, just because young wanted rush to report to him, not him consulting his actions with rush. you want to control this man, but he is like a force of nature, you both are like two hurricanes meeting at some point and you either collide and become even more dangerous together or destroy each other and everything around you.
oh, and let's appreciate this screencap here, idk, I just love it, because I love men suffering, also robert carlyle has pretty hands there
he ain't wrong here. young does something on impulse and then regrets, he can be calm and strategic, but when it comes to something he cannot control, something like rush, he is all about emotions, bringing out the worst in him, and causing to act based on impulse rather than thinking about his actions through, he does it after, and it usually ends with regret, as we saw in 'justice'. yay my fav part <3
anyway, idk where I was going with this but here we are
oh and you know what I love about young? he is a man of force, using fists instead of words, but he actually listens if you talk to him, and even if he does not always understand it he tries and is not opposed to explore something new and learn and stay on an ancient ship with 10 more people and the man who framed him for murder just to find out what lies beyond it all. you may say it's because he feels responsible for those people, and yes, he does, but I also like to think that it's not just responsibility, but young just wanting to go to unknown places to see wonders of the universe.
#text#young x rush#this is not an analysis or smt#Im just dumping my thoughts at 1 am after 2 days of no sleep and too many pills.#I don't know where I was going by putting this all here#but I would not be me if I did not say that the intimate part of their life would be as aggressive as their fights in the show#it would be all about dominating#be it physical#or mentally. Im just thinking about them way too much...#and after that one of them being gentle would be like 'good morning' scene but in bed and im yelling just thinking about it#i might see this all differently in two secs and it would totally contradict whatever i wrote here don't listen to me#inconsistence is my second name#it's not even everything there's so many thoughts floating around in my head i just can't catch them all to put into words#im that kid who sits and looks at the wall for hours while there's a war happening inside their head#might add some more random thoughts here and there after#they occupied my brain and i can't help it#watching adventures#sgu
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