#wouldnt let me leave
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Going to vent in the tags, feel free to ignore. Or interact I guess if you're so inclined
#tw vent#tw sa mention#tw sa#sa mention#it's weird acknowledging that i was sa'd in high school by someone a year older than me#i kept/keep denying that it was sa since it wasnt as bad as it could have been#but im trying to be more open with myself about it and accept it for what it is#i was held against my will by a “friend” in high school#who knew i was interested in someone else and they forced me to kiss them multiple times#touched down the side of my dress#wouldnt let me leave#held me against them and kept repeating over and over again that it was okay- what they were doing#so i feel like that affected me somewhat- logically I knew it wasn't okay but because it was repeated so much in that moment#part of me wanted to believe it#my parents still dont know what happened that night - just that i wanted to get picked up early#i went to one adult i trusted but when i confided in him- he just spouted bible bullshit at me instead of helping me get help#i went to an adult and he failed me#my inner teen is still hurt by all of this and i really hope that at some point I'm able to heal from this#because it's exhausting
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cass, a professional: order of badass donbot, extra dramatic entrance!
me, nodding, banned from most kitchens: leo drama and angst, heard chef!
(shoutout to @somerandomdudelmao for yet again making feel emotions i cannot fully explain)
#my art#cass apocalyptic series#rottmnt#rise of the tmnt#future leo#future donnie#this is super rough and sketchy cos dude i RAN after reading that update#spectacular donbot design of course#but also#bro this circular timetravel shit has got me Feeling Emotions#like#leo stood in that room and wept and BEGGED for some echo of his brother#some proof that even in death#he wouldnt leave them alone#that he was as unwilling to fade from them as they were to let him go#the man had failsafes for failsafes on top of failsafes#plans ontop of plans; surely hed planned something for this?#and heres the thing#donnie did#he built this machine#to house his spirit and allow him to be with his family#but when leo asked for it#the room was already empty#idk its really hard to articulate#you can fix the past but the past still happened#you relieved the grief but you still had to go through it#schrodiners cat but sadder#he is dead and alive all at once but always gone from you#donnie will never be there (with you then) because he has always been here (with you now)#IDK BRO TIME TRAVEL MAKES FOR FUN CIRCULAR LOOPS
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AU where when Danny first got in the portal for the picture jazz being the protective older sister she is and knowing her parents "lab safety" she goes in with Danny and when he trips her immediate thought was to save him from falling in the danger trap she considered the portal and they both become halfas que the canon ghost shenanigans but add protect younger siblings obsessed jazz being a absolute nightmare standing behind Danny the hole time just daring someone to go after team phantom and any time they do they immediately regret as they have angered the older sibling and mercy is not an option.
When pariah dark happens they team up to own him no suit required and jazz and Danny become sibling rulers of the realms.
Somehow their parents find out and go mad scientist on them jazz is 18 in this so says fuck you takes Danny and as the nature secretly petty as shit just calls CPS and takes Danny and sues her parents for child support.
They + Sam & Tucker (because they can convince Tucker's parents it will be good for his future tech career and Sam just tells her parents she's going to stay with her dads side of the family(the drakes)) go to Gotham because no GIW unlike Amity and is ecto rich I also imagine that both are on their way to becoming Ancients of space (Danny) and as odd as it seems older siblings(jazz) they are confused at first until it's explained that the belief of the love and protections that older siblings are some of the most protective and also mischievous towards their younger siblings has built up to for an ancient and jazz just happened to become that ancient.
Que jazz helping college students in the Gotham U library study when they miss their older siblings help like when they where growing up and just being a protection spirit but to siblings in particular. This becomes super annoying when the bats and the birds start setting off her instincts after joker escapes and she can only relax after beating the shit out of him with the anti-creep stick in front of red hood who promptly falls in love with her much to the annoyance of Danny who was already secretly dating tim and meeting at the local coffee shop and ordering their coffee
Feel free to add your own ideas and if anyone writes it please send me a link or title I would love to support your story💖
#dp×dc#danny phantom#batman#anger management#dead tired#AU#bad parents jack and maddie fenton#jazz fenton#danny fenton#jason todd#tim drake#let jazz go feral#good friends sam & tucker#this was rotting in my brain and wouldnt leave so you can suffer with me#if anyone wants to feed my addiction please let me know the fic title or send me a link#badass jazz fenton#supported danny fenton#let jazz drag the ghost therapist bitch#let danny be a menace to the rouge gallery in gothem#Harley would adopt jazz on principle and help her through her classes#how do i tag
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#i SWEAR i will answer the asks i got this just got into my brain and wouldnt leave lmao#yi knows your ip number#i was thinking in here they are around 3 years actually#we still got no canon knowledge on who is the eldest and who is the youngest but i headcanon it like#uno (oldest and will always let everyone know) odyn (second oldest and oldest middle child) moja (youngest middle child) yi (youngest)#yi isvery smart for her age!!!#she already reading and writing and dissing her brother look at her go!!!#im also not putting a read more on this one because the last time i did that so many people were yelling at me in the tags#to not put my stuff under read more#I LISTENED OK#HERE YOU GO#FORCES YOU TO LOOK AT MY SILLY STUFF#peepaw and babies au#tmnt#tmnt the last ronin#the last ronin lost years#tmnt uno#tmnt moja#tmnt yi#tmnt odyn#tmnt mikey#tmnt michelangelo#doodles#my art
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starscream: WHY must every bot be SOOO irritating? EVEN MORE THAN THEY USUALLY ARE. & THAT'S A SKY HIGH BAR . ..Why can't i just form my new cybertronian republic in peace. the only thing that could make this worse Besides megatron (because he's a Constant. ) is the totally asinine, in no way possible, abstract nightmare of being haunted by annoyingly-upbeat commentary that only i can hear.. thank primu-
the Heavenly Bee:
#bumblebee didnt even know starscream was the only one who could see him#bumblebee just wanted to go back to his comfort routine of staring exasperatedly at starscream in silent judgement#they both scream when they realize they can see each other#bumblebee runs through a wall to go hide behind a potted plant and starscream runs into a wall#pov u are starscream trying to recharge but u offhandedly called bumblebee bumblebutt 4 million yrs ago#& bee is reminded of it when u call another bot a mean name and in the middle of him lecturing u on addressing ppl with respect he#suddenly thats so raven flashbacked to that specific insult and is now expressing his disapproval for u to know#' you said this -_- . you say this ? to Me? to Bumblebee -_- ?? ... you said this 😑..'#'BUMBLEBEE IT'S 3AM LEAVE ME ALONEEEE-'#windblade: that poor gay man is still not over the loss of his wife 💔#i wouldnt be either. if i lost my annoying ass bumblebee id let the world burn#bumblebee#starscream#starbee#transformers idw#traanformers#maccadam
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watched brokeback mountain yesterday.... mid as fuck. i think it wouldve played out a lot better if the main characters were yuri and jimmy from yarichin bitch club. do u see my vision?
#brokeback mountain#yarichin bitch club#yarichin b club#toru fujisaki#yuri ayato#ybc#ybc jimmy#yuritoru#idk their fuckin ship name#im a gay male im allowed to say brokeback mountain actually fucking sucks#i get what its doing yknow time period repression tragedy wrong time wrong place BUT GODDD I JUST DONT CARE#I DONT CARE IT SUCKS AND CHEATING TURNS ME OFF SO BAD#its like good in a technical skill way okay its a well made movie but my enjoyment was a solid 2/10 i could only watch it wif my friends#main way this could be improved is if the main characters were jimmy and yuri#if yuri and jimmy were doing this shit.... lets just say they wouldnt be hatecrimed to death for being gay#theyd be begged to leave town purely bc theyre both batshit insane and jimmy would accidentally kill 17 people via homemade cookie poisoning#draws#**obama voice** just to be queer. i traced over screenshots for this shitpost. that is all
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the passenger (2023) / granite - sleep token
so keep an eye on the road or we will both be here forever
#txt#the passenger#the passenger 2023#sleep token#idk what else 2 tag this#anyway i havent made an amv in a decade but this concept wouldnt leave my brain so hopefully i can listen to the song in PEACEEE#also tumblr. pls. let me upload this#maybe i'll dabble in making the occasional amv.. i had fun w this one
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after two years i finally draw the favorite
#my art#still learning honestly. idk how to explain it but some medias youre so fixated on and obsessed with u instantly want to draw everyone#for me dunmeshi has always been the opposite. series and characters i enjoy sm i cannot bring myself to pick up a pencil#for some reason. it got a lot worse once the anime started airing idk. simply forcing myself to get some of my energy out. in a way#dunmeshi#dungeon meshi#thistle#dunmeshi thistle#thistle dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#>_< series i was into since late 2021. yet u wouldnt know that unless u follow my side twitter account. sowwy ig#i do this with a lot of franchises honestly. cannot bring myself to draw even if i think abt the characters constantly. ie skip to loafer#u will nvr catch me calling this guy sissel sorry. save that name for Mr. Ghost Trick. another thing i. also. dnt talk abt. which i adore#i need to get better at talking abt and expressing myself for the things that i enjoy. ive been wanting to draw laios for a good#while too but im scared. for some reason. u-u should nvr let a white man do that to me honestly.#for now i'll thistle tho. maybe we will get kabru namari or mithrun next from me >_< i have to talk myself into it#i think the closest way i can explain why i cannot bring myself to draw for some series is that i dnt want to mess up somehow#like 'ilu so much [character] what if i cnt draw u the way u deserve even tho i love u sm what if its not enough.' <- leaves it to sm1 else#tbh [scratches head] i prefer the version with less coloring ^-^ but i realize the one thats more colored would get more eyes on it... hm
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LIN MANUEL MIRANDA & JORGE RIVERA HERRANS
I liked the PJO Disney show, it was decent
however
I am criminally disappointed the TROY didn’t get to play Hermes
no hate to Lin Manuel Miranda, but I can’t help but imagine Hermes as a musical fella who’s got ✨pizzazz✨
But imagine the THUNDERCLAP if Jorge Rivera Herrans & Lin Manuel Miranda did a collab. It would be L-L-L-L-LEGENDARY!
But like, IMAGINE THE ABSOLUTE VIBE HE WOULD BRING
LIKE LIN MANUEL MIRANDA SINGING RUTHLESSNESS IS MERCY UPON OURSELVES—
PETITION TO GET MR. I AM THE INFAMOUS, OFYSSEUS!—AND THE MR. I AM NOT THROWIN’ AWAY MY SHOT!— IN THE SAME WRITERS ROOM
#Troy hermes#Voice actor Troy#epic the musical#epic the musical Troy#epic musical#epic#epic the wisdom saga#epic the thunder saga#epic the underworld saga#epic the troy saga#jorge rivera herrans#lin manuel miranda#hamilton poll#hamilton musical#alexander hamilton#TELL ME IT WOULDNT BE AMAZING#LETS MAKE IT HAPPEN#someone on this place has to have Disney connections#That mouse is everywhere#Epic poll#Epic the musical poll#fandom polls#tumblr polls#my polls#random polls#polls#Someone draw the two Hermes chatting please that’d be epic—#See what I did there?#I’ll leave now
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everybody wants toxic bf sunghoon BUT what ab toxic baby daddy sunghoon 😈😈😈
#kaia and lee alrdy know ab this#kinda need to write that tho#i’d never let a man treat me like that irl but….#fiction is DIFFERENT#he could leave me w 5 kids and i wouldnt even care bro#shameless ik 😔😔#it is what it is#im actually insanenfhsj
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i prescribe to the theory that everyone entered Evo a human
but didn't leave one
#except for nelly maybe#and i dont mean they all became watchers or listeners either#i mean grian left a watcher#but the others? they got fucked up some other way#pearl's either a mothman or a werewolf. or both. weremoth#jimmy left a canary. which sounds innocent but we know the truth. (could be interpretted as 'avian' but a part of me likes a siren twist)#(the canary in the coal mine is singing after all)#martyn. well i like to think martyn left either a listener or a messenger#whats a messenger? wouldnt you like to know weather boy#salems a witch or a demon obviously (not obviously i dont actually know her that well)#and big b? well. let's just say they dont call him big for nothin#actually jk giant is cool but i actually like to think that he's one of the ones where they're not. not really sure what's up with him#a la secret life shenanigans#but he does seem weirdly obsessed with holes and corridors for some strange reason#and taurtis? well i like to think taurtis didn't get to leave.#he got glitched into the Downside Up but he's still human. technically. just broken code now#as for the others i dont know them well enough :(#zee becomes a squid hybrid cause of squiddy?#evo smp#grian#evo grian#grian evo#evo martyn#martyn inthelittlewood#jimmy solidarity#the watchers#evo watchers#evolution smp#mc evolution#watcher grian
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Hugs for joey <3
#his big smile !!!!!#they way he follows them with his body after they leave :(((#they better give him 100 kisses#also#2360#sorry the quality is so trash i literally had to film my screen bc tsn wouldnt let me screen record#toronto maple leafs#leafs lb#joseph woll#morgan rielly#david kampf#matthew knies#*
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the bad: i have been raised without much warmth from my parents in childhood, but also pressured to conform to familial authority, doubt myself always, and value familial connections above all else (<- failed at this, and feel guilt about it.)
but also in experiencing this i have been so isolated from the entire rest of the world and others, that it will be nearly impossible to create my own "family" -> find safety and comfort in anybody else once my family is Gone. despite dis i find it really difficult to break away from the familiar, disobey and disappoint, because, well, why are my wishes more important than anybody else's. why would I cause upset and distress in anybody, and exert so much effort into my doubt filled half decisions, for my meaningless little Wishes. being away would also mean less time with these people who I'll never see again once they're gone. being raised this way is definitely paying off for those who did so.
the good: yaaaay adjacent inspiration for writing talon lore
#talkys#my dad scaring me but also giving me no advice on what to do instead only saying if i do this it will be the wrong choice leading#to more wrong choices well yep you got me i am scared. i am inept. i fear regret and punishment for wrong decisions.#i struggle to make decisions because i cant go back on them.#''ill never have savings again'' and ''you cant value friends over family they'll abandon you''#and ''living here is only a problem for you because you dont communicate. there is a way to work things out''#i wish i could work it out and stay i dont know why i cant work it out ! and what do i want#to leave so badly for... to continue to never have stable housing#never have savings again? be alone and in danger?#to be able to wear whatever i want and...buy things? really? that doesnt seem very worth it#nothing seems very worth it#im miserable here but maybe i'd be more miserable away...it is true#well at least the chances to leave are very slim. and will continue to get slimmer the more time passes.#but maybe its fine i dont want to ruin my life or be even more of a burden or reason for distress in someone else's#moving out wouldnt fix anything. wherever you go there you are.#my friend said i have to be a little selfish (positive) to push myself to leave. bt i dont want to be selfish. im ashamed of that as a trai#delete later#even now i feel immense guilt and stress when my dad does things that hurt or bother me bc i know ill miss him when he's gone.#(and ill have nobody after all of that. due to the being kept in a cage)#that sucks. why does everyone else always win. why am i always the weakest pliable one. i wish i had no emotions#my surgery is the only decision in my life ive been 100% sure on for years#and even then my parent's words had me crying and rapidly changing emotions daily until the day came#im not strong enough or sure enough about anything else to withstand More of that#<- and i know that tomorrow im gonna be like actually you know what who cares lets try to leave#and the next day ill be resigned to staying here forever#and the next day ill be like actually you know what who cares l
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Curly Mouthwashing is that post that's like. Character who made undeniably the wrong decision but also I dunno if I could make a better one.
#nova transmits#mouthwashing#its like. ok im metagaming here but knowing what Jimmy does when he feels threatened? i would not let his ass know i knew!#never leave anya alone with him again yes. actually confront him? no he'd lay my ass out and kill someone. realistically everyone.#obviously curlys circumstances and reasons are different and that matters. apathy vs fear.#but im not gonna lie and pretend i would know what to do. the cryopods wouldnt even come to me honestly
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THE FINAL STRETCH. Unfinished/unposted art from July-December!!!!!!!!!!
#here’s that bloody Zam I keep vaguing urggggg#just gonna toss him out here and let him be a sketch <33 kissing him on the forehead whatever#lifesteal smp#pangilive#I really like that Pangi awww#clownpierce#branzycraft#branzypierce#vitalasy#princezam#vitalazam#ok first one is starfox we all know starfox#then an alt Pangi that just WOULDNT leave my head so I made him real <33#then final girl Clownpierce bc I listened to think about me by kaneda7 a little too much whoops#(in the middle of those two r some ocs hold on lemme tag them)#oc: Saber#oc: Daisy#Saber looks so awkward there that’s funny#uhhh then the bloody Zam variety pack yeehaw#and some bzps!!!!#nox art
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guys what do we think about in a scenario where 3 star fam were responsible for mxes and the nodes in ruin that Cassies dad is the arcade conspiracy guy from security breach and PQ4 is a major part of his motivations for being in the pizzaplex in hw2
#it also lines up with the purple glitchy coin granting him access to pq4 in hw2 bc#arcade guy played 1 and 2 but pq wouldnt let him play 3#it locked him out even tho he completed thr same requirements gregory haf#he wasnt 'worthy'#so the princess passing him the sword in hw2 is him being made worthy and allowed to play 4#idk feels like some connections there#but i also feel like its not motivation enough for hw2 and leaves a lot of gaps of his role as a technician and stuff#im not too involved in the discussion of whether it was 3 star or cassies dad responsible for mxes and the nodes in ruin rn bc#after observing all the evidence for both sides its clear that they both have equal amounts of evidence and its impossible to tell#which it really is rn#so im just gonna wait until something new is brought to the table#thinking about it does nothing but make me think in circles and theres no way to truly prove either side so#just gonna wait#pandas.txt#thoughts#theory
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