#would do the trick as far as the cat is concerned

[decarbry]

yabureme, willing to suffer for the sake of others bc of his programming, upon receiving a dead bird from the cat and not wanting the cat to think he doesn't appreciate the thought: ... guess i gotta eat this. (cue shiggy walking in to yabureme w his mouth full, feathers sticking out of his mouth and his red eye grimacing. shiggy ends up doing the "HEY. WHAT DO YOU HAVE? DROP IT! you do to dogs)

[crystallinestars]

Comforting you when you're sad

Headcanons about the Genshin boys comforting you when you're feeling down for whatever reason.

I don't know what I wrote but I hope it's enjoyable nonetheless.

Characters: Venti, Lyney, Kaeya, Alhaitham, Wanderer, Kaveh

Venti

🍃 When Venti first sees the sullen expression on your face, his cheerful smile wanes into concerned curiosity as he asks what happened to make you so sad. He doesn’t want to force you to answer if you would rather not talk about it, but he can tell the sadness is weighing heavy on your heart, so he takes you home and asks one more time what happened. His words and voice are gentle, his gaze tender as he cups and strokes your cheek, hoping to make you comfortable enough to open up to him.

🍃 His gentle coaxing works to make your guard crumble and the tears you held back come streaming down your cheeks. Venti isn’t used to comforting crying people, but he hugs you, letting you cry into his shoulder while stroking your head, letting you know it’s okay to cry. He doesn’t say a word until your crying fit subsides into hiccups and sniffles, and only then does he let his voice be heard as he softly hums a lullaby he once overheard a mother sing to a crying child a long time ago.

🍃 When you’ve calmed down, Venti asks what you want to do. He'll stay with you if you would rather stay home to keep you company, however, he thinks it would do you some good to go out instead of staying cooped up in these four walls. If you agree to go outside, Venti will stroll around the city market, trying to entice you with this item or that. Do you want to check out the knickknacks at Marjorie’s? Or the new potions Timaeus is brewing? Or what about that one dish at the Good Hunter you’ve always wanted to try but never got around to? Venti would buy them all for you—his treat! He would even brave his cat allergy and stop by the Cat’s Paw so you can try one of Diona’s special concoctions. Venti acts peppy and cheery throughout the impromptu date, hoping to lift your dampened mood with his enthusiasm.

🍃 If the little date doesn’t do the trick to cheer you up, then Venti drags you outside the city walls. Leading you by the hand, Venti brings you to the open grassy plains of Windrise and beckons you to take in the world around you. Look at that beautiful blue sky and feel the warmth of the sun on your skin. Feel the wind play with your hair and hear the rustling of leaves in the great oak tree. Walk along the beach with him while smelling the salty ocean breeze and splashing water at each other as if you were little children. Climb the oak tree at Windrise and watch the squirrels and birds that call it their home scurry about in the branches. Lay in the grass and watch the starry sky with him while he strums a soothing song on his lyre that he composed just for you.

🍃 It's not a guarantee his method will work, but Venti hopes this outing can help you feel free from whatever burdens you. Despite his youthful appearance and demeanor, Venti is an old soul who has seen and experienced his fair share of suffering. He is aware that sadness sticks around far longer than joy, for such is the human condition, but he also knows that it shouldn’t overshadow everything in life. Though life can beat you down and Venti may not be able to solve your problems, there is so much more to the world than the little bubble you confine yourself to.

Lyney

🎩 Lyney’s expression lights up when he sees you from afar, but the tired look in your eyes and the weak smile you give him tell the magician you’re feeling down. He looks at you in concern and gently asks if something is wrong to make you so down. He attentively listens if you want to share the reason, and lets the conversation go if you don’t want to talk about it, but either way, he wants to distract you from your negative feelings.

🎩 Lyney has the most experience dealing with Lynette’s sour moods, so out of habit he brings you to a café and lets you order anything you want from the menu, offering to pay for it. He lets you talk if you want to vent or if you want to stay quiet, he fills the silence with funny stories about people he saw in the streets of Fontaine.

🎩 Though he appears his usual chipper self, in reality, he’s worried about you. If spending time with him isn’t enough to brighten your mood, Lyney drops his cheery façade and gently takes your hands in his. With a concerned look, he persuades you to at the very least stop bottling up your emotions and depend on him. As an older brother, he feels a lot of responsibility to care for those he loves, and that responsibility also extends to you.

🎩 Once he sees that his words touched your heart and you’re on the verge of tears, he escorts you to a private alleyway where you can cry freely without the prying eyes of passersby. Lyney hugs you close and whispers words of comfort in your ear, letting you cry into his shoulder. He has a lot of experience comforting Lynette and his siblings at the orphanage, so Lyney knows what to do to support you during your most vulnerable moment. His reassurances help calm you down, and he wipes your tears away with a handkerchief. Though it saddens him to see you so upset, he’s also grateful that you opened up to him about your feelings.

🎩 Afterward, Lyney offers to take you to play with his animal assistants. He teaches you how to feed them, and watches you play with his animals, seeing you gradually relax and give a small smile as a pigeon coos and cuddles into your hand.

🎩 Alternatively, Lyney might invite you to a private magic show; one he designed for your eyes only. The magician brings you to his room in the orphanage where the two of you can be alone and he has access to his props. With a cheeky smirk and flourish of his hand, Lyney materializes a Rainbow Rose from thin air and hands it to you, telling you to keep your eyes on him. He begins his performance, narrating it like any regular show even though you’re the sole audience member. Lyney shows off all the tricks he is certain you haven’t seen before, even mixing in some new ones he hasn’t quite perfected but included anyway. He injects a dramatic and comedic flair into the performance in the hopes of making you laugh. Once you do, Lyney grins, pleased he could make you feel better. In his mind, laughter is the best cure for sadness.

Kaeya

❄️ When Kaeya catches a glimpse of you, he is instantly able to tell you’re out of sorts. Though you smile at him, it’s weak and does a poor job of masking the sorrow in your eyes. You’re clearly not as okay as you try to seem, but Kaeya is unsure of how to help you feel better. He’s not used to comforting people. His only experiences are helping crying children find their parents during crowded festivals, and clumsily bandaging Diluc’s scrapes when they were little. But you are neither a child nor his sworn brother, so he momentarily feels lost about how to help you.

❄️ Such delicate situations are not Kaeya’s forte, but as your boyfriend, he wants to help you feel better. So, he steels himself and, in his usual teasing lilt, inquires what happened to make you look so sour. Though he sounds playful, Kaeya takes your feelings seriously, so when you look like you’re about to cry, he quickly escorts you somewhere private.

❄️ When you break down, he’s at a loss for what to do since he’s never had to comfort anyone like this before. Then, a memory surfaces in his mind of when Adelinde hugged him as a crying child, so he hesitantly wraps you up in a loose embrace, mimicking her hug the best he could. It’s a foreign feeling, holding you while you cry into his shoulder. He feels helpless just standing there with your shaking body in his arms, but he also knows it’s the best he can do for you right now, so he gently rubs your back the way Adelinde did for him all those years ago and hopes it helps you the way it did him.

❄️ Kaeya stays quiet until your crying fit subsides. He’s unsure of what to say as you slowly collect yourself, but he softly asks if you want to go drinking. Perhaps some alcohol from the Angel’s Share can help you feel better? If you agree, Kaeya takes you to the tavern where you share a drink and watch a bard perform a heroic epic about an adventurer. Alternatively, if you like cats, Kaeya brings you to the Cat’s Paw to play with the cats there and get a specialty drink from Diona (his treat). He also coerces you into a few rounds of TCG and pretends to play fairly but purposely loses to give you the wins in the hopes that the little victories would brighten your mood.

❄️ If you don’t want to drink, then Kaeya invites you over to the Dawn Winery. It feels strange to bring you to his childhood home when he hasn’t lived there in years, but he’s hoping that Adelinde could help. Ever since the head maid found out that Kaeya had a lover, she had asked for details about you, but Kaeya refused to disclose much of anything. Questions about his love life from someone he saw as a mother figure made him shy, so he avoided talking about you.

❄️ As he expected, Adelinde was overjoyed to finally meet you and she welcomed you inside just as warmly as she did Kaeya. She whips up a delicious dinner for your pair and spends the evening chatting with you, asking you about yourself and sharing all of Kaeya’s childhood stories that he never told you about, especially the funny ones much to his chagrin. The homey atmosphere and fun conversation do the trick to take your mind off of whatever bothered you, and though it came at Kaeya’s expense, he was happy to see you smiling like your usual self again.

Alhaitham

🎧 Upon your arrival home, Alhaitham’s brows pinch together in concern when he sees you looking down. He doesn’t pry into what happened, preferring for you to tell him what was wrong when you were ready to talk about it. However, if you don’t share the reason behind your sadness, and your mood doesn’t improve or grows worse, the Scribe gently calls out to you and tactfully asks what happened in a calm and gentle tone.

🎧 No matter how small the reason, Alhaitham hears you out without judgment, understanding that people can have a bouquet of reactions to situations he may not perceive to be as worthy of his concern. Even if he wouldn’t feel the same as you in your situation, he still tries to understand your point of view and help you deal with your emotions. If Alhaitham finds it applicable, he will offer advice for your situation. However, he is perceptive enough to tell when mere advice won’t help resolve your current mood, and that you require comfort. 

🎧 Alhaitham’s eyes soften, and he gently pulls you into his chest with a simple comment: “Don’t hold it all in. Cry if you need to.” Sometimes, releasing pent-up emotions is what a person needs to feel better, and the Scrobe doesn’t want you to wallow in your misery all alone. He holds you to him while you cry, placing his chin atop your head and lightly stroking your back in comfort without saying a word. 

🎧 His usually calm expression turns somber and his hold on you tightens a little as a dull ache surges through his heart. Alhaitham is not one to become influenced by the emotions of others easily, but despite what some people may think, he is not immune to others’ distress. He doesn’t like seeing others suffer, and seeing you so upset is no exception. Your suffering affects him a little more because he loves you and wants you to be at your best, so he will do everything in his power to help.

🎧 Once your crying fit subsides, Alhaitham lets you choose what you want to do next. If you want some privacy to deal with your emotions, he lets you go and occasionally checks up on you to see how you’re doing. If you say you want to stay with him, Alhaitham fetches a blanket knitted by his late grandmother that she used to wrap him up in and drapes it over you. He brews you a cup of tea before inviting you to read with him on the sofa. Should you choose to join him, Alhaitham will keep an arm around you while reading a book, not interrupting your reading but letting you feel he’s here. 

🎧 If you’re not in the mood to read, then the Scribe cuddles with you on the sofa. He lets you rest your head on his chest, running a hand along your back while holding a book with the other. If you want to hear the sound of his voice, Alhaitham will read the book to you out loud. If you prefer the silence and the sound of his heartbeat, then he stays quiet and holds you until you fall asleep, kissing your forehead once you doze off.

Wanderer

☂️ As soon as Wanderer sees you, he instantly realizes you’re feeling down. Even when you smile and say you’re fine, his perceptive nature makes it easy for him to tell you’re not. As a frank person, Wanderer prefers you to be straightforward about your feelings and wants, so it’s frustrating when you keep things to yourself like this. He frowns and asks what made you act like such a wet blanket, but despite his unfriendly scowl, he remains patient and hears you out.

☂️ What he’s not prepared for is your tears. When you start crying in the middle of your explanation, Wanderer’s frown melts into surprise and then concern before quickly pulling you into a hug. He’s not used to comforting crying people, but a part of Wanderer urges him to comfort you, so he follows his instincts. Soothing words and caresses are not his forte, but Wanderer quietly murmurs for you to stop bottling everything inside and confide in him. Cry if you need to, it’s fine. He’s got you.

☂️ Wanderer’s embrace is both tight yet careful as if he were holding something precious and fragile. The way you felt in his arms was certainly fragile. Shoulders hunched and shaking, muffling your sniffles against his shirt and soaking the fabric with your tears. Something in his chest feels tight when he sees you this broken, and it sparks a desire in him to fix whatever happened to make you this upset. Even if the cause is outside of his power to fix, Wanderer at least wants you to stop crying and go back to your annoying and yet endearing self.

☂️ When you calm down, Wanderer acts more mindful around you. He chooses his words carefully and keeps his tone soft as he tells you it’s normal to be upset in this situation, but you shouldn’t lose hope so easily. Usually, he would be blunter with his words, but with you in such a precarious state, he wants to be careful. He knows his bluntness can sometimes upset people, and the last thing he wants is to make you more upset.

☂️ Wanderer lets you choose what you want to do: do you want to stay home or come with him to a secret place? If you choose to stay home, he tells you to clean yourself up while he busies himself in the kitchen. He whips up a few delicious and hearty dishes and tells you to eat and stop moping when he serves them up. When you point out that these are all your favorite foods, he scoffs and says that it’s all he could make with the ingredients on hand, but reluctantly adds that he thought your favorite foods would help you feel better. If you thank him, he grows flustered and tells you not to because he didn’t do anything special, but it makes him feel happy inside that you appreciated his efforts.

☂️ If you choose to come with him, then Wanderer takes you to a secret place of his. It’s a little vantage point he found in the Lokapala Jungle that looks especially pretty at night, and he wanted to bring you here one day but figured today was as good a day as any. He flies up there with you and lets you take in the view. Surrounding you are various bioluminescent flora that disperse the darkness with their soft glow. Fireflies softly float about your pair as you sit on the soft grass and look up at the star-filled sky. There’s an ethereal beauty to the place that distracts you from your depressing thoughts and lifts your sunken spirits. He stays here with you for as long as you want, chatting about various topics and weaving you a flower crown to remember the occasion by.

Kaveh

🍷 When Kaveh sees your sullen demeanor, he immediately realizes you’re feeling down. He knows what it’s like to suffer from sadness and depression all alone, and he doesn’t want you to deal with such feelings on your own. Though it’s hypocritical of him, the architect wishes that you would confide in him, so gently prompts you to share what happened. Even if you tell him you’re fine, Kaveh won’t buy it but won’t pressure you to tell him.

🍷 However, he worries deeply about your mental well-being, and if he sees no improvements or even a worsening of your mental state, he takes your hand and leads you to the sofa. Kaveh cups your cheek and pleads with you to confide in him. Tell him what’s wrong because he wants to help you feel better so badly, and it frustrates him that he can’t.

🍷 His efforts pay off in making you give in and tell him what happened to make you feel this way. Even if there’s no particular reason for your sadness, Kaveh takes your feelings seriously. He wraps his arms around you in a gentle yet firm hug when you start crying, his expression solemn because seeing you in pain like this makes his heart ache. Kaveh holds you close until you let out all your sadness, whispering reassurances and kissing the top of your head. He strokes your back to comfort you, not caring that you’re soaking his shirt with tears and snot. Your well-being is far more important to him than his clothes.

🍷 Once you calm down, Kaveh dotes on you. He gets you tissues, some water, a blanket—you name it, he’ll bring it. With a gentle smile, Kaveh asks if you want to go out and do something to get your mind off whatever made you sad. If you want to stay home to recuperate from your crying fit, then Kaveh will spend the evening cuddling you and making sure you’re okay.

🍷 If you accept, Kaveh will take you out to Lambad’s Tavern. When life beat him down, he turned to heavy drinking to forget his troubles, and though he doesn’t want you to get plastered the way he did (because it’s bad for your health! He says) he offers to buy you a drink, hoping a light buzz could take the edge off your grief. Even if you don’t drink alcohol, Kaveh buys you a non-alcoholic drink and keeps you company. From his personal experience, sometimes a drink and good company are all you need to feel better, so he chats about various topics and gives advice if you need it. He also listens if you want to vent, offering a sympathetic ear and supportive words.

🍷 If you don’t want to drink, Kaveh takes you out on a stroll around Sumeru city. He surmises that a change of scenery can help take your mind off things, so he takes your hand and walks along the streets, showing you all the spots with pretty views. He comments how each location looks especially beautiful during sunset or at night when the stars are shining in the sky and offers to bring you here later if you want to see that breathtaking view. Afterward, he takes you out for a delicious meal at his expense. Kaveh is more than willing to spend his meager savings on you if it means making you happy. He won’t be able to rest easy unless you feel better, so he pulls out all the stops to try and cheer you up if only a little.

[mondaymelon]

₊˚ෆ 𝐈 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐊𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐀 𝐒𝐄𝐂𝐑𝐄𝐓, 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐘𝐎𝐔? | lyney, neuvillette, wriothesely x gn!reader

ˋ°•*⁀➷ cw: established relationship, fluffity fluff !! art by @/puna_822 on twitter, edited by me!

⤷ shh!! secret relationships with the fontaine men ₊˚ෆ

— Lyney will keep the secret well, of course. He’s a jack of all trades, and a little bit of misconception is nothing taxing for someone who can trick the eye with just a simple swipe of his hands.

…Though, his personality often brings much more to deal with behind the scenes. His every action is designed as a ruse, trying to draw any and every reaction from you - whether it be making you irritated as can be or practically burning from his smooth words. He’ll at the red on your face with a light smirk gracing his lips. “Embarrassed, now, are we? Mhm, best wipe it off your face though, lest anyone find out~”

Dealing with the magician was a headache. A delightful one, but painful nonetheless. He has a habit of saying whatever he wants, and it doesn’t help that he’s so good at it too. His tongue can twist poems out of thin air, or pickup lines at the drop of a hat. The number of times Lynette had glanced over at you with a concerned gaze was far more than you could count, and it would be only a matter of time before another carefully crafted sentence sent the entire mirage into collapse. The two of you had only decided to keep your relationship private in the first place due to work affairs. It’d just make things more frustrating if people were aware of the connection. In earlier weeks, you had tried to confront the man about the entire predicament, but he had only laughed it off with a shrug of his shoulders and a jesting beam. 

“Oh, don’t tell me that the words I tell you every day still make you so flustered? Archons, you really are a hopeless romantic, aren’t you? Although, for you, I suppose I’m no different…” 

When Freminet had eventually voiced his worries, gently holding your hands and saying, “A-Are you okay? Your face is really red, are you sick? Should I walk y-you home?”, there was no other choice but to shake your head, cover your flushed cheeks as best you could with a hand, and tell a blatant lie that there was nothing out of the ordinary.

There most certainly was, and it was the cat-like man who stood off to the side, a sly smirk on his face and one of his eyes closed in a wink. Not helping, Lyney.

When would the day come for you to be the one to make him flustered? Perhaps it was sooner than you thought, on his opening night for the new season. You weren’t sure if he had expected to see you in the crowd, but as he was performing his wonderous tricks, eyes sweeping over the hundreds present, his shimmering lilac eyes locked onto yours. His professional smile stretched a little wider, and as he pulled a dove out of his hat with a flourish of his arms, beamed. The astonished look on your face was something he’d be sure not to forget.

As soon as the lights dim onstage, he hurries off of it, giving Lynette a quick farewell and combing back his unruly hair with his fingers. He spots you standing by the exit, holding… a bouquet of roses in your arms? They were a beautiful sight, yet paled in comparison to how ethereal you looked in the moment, the spotlights afar illuminating your face with a glow and your eyes sparkling with delight. This always happens when the two of you are alone - he’ll switch from verbal affection to physical, and this time is no exception. He sweeps you into his arms, slotting his lips against yours as he pulls you into a deep kiss that leaves you breathless and red. However, this time, the blush dusting your cheeks is not only on your face but his, as he takes the flowers in his arms with a bright smile. 

“For me, love? Come now, I can’t possibly keep how good we are together from everyone else, can I?” ₊˚ෆ

— Neuvillette is… an interesting case. For starters, he’s baffled at the concept of keeping the relationship a secret. Elaborate that you don’t want to ruin his reputation as a perfect, just, and stone-cold judge, and he’ll oblige… reluctantly. He still doesn’t understand - just why can’t he show you how much he loves you in public?

For now, he’ll have to chalk it up as more human affairs that he’s deemed too complicated to figure out. Ground rules have been laid out - no mentioning the relationship, no telling anyone either… not even the melusines, which was a fair case, since they’d be sure to spread the news faster than wildfire. The mortal realm is far more puzzling than it seems, he concludes somberly. An unfamiliar world that was arduous to coexist in. It’ll be alright, though, as long as he can intertwine his fingers with yours and look into your eyes and-

“N- Sir Neuvillette… not here!” You chide quietly, slowly withdrawing your hand from his. His face falls into an instant, brows furrowing. He’ll bite his tongue, for your sake, and remain silent, yet his fingers twitch. Archons, his hands feel so much better when they’re in yours. The man watches with dejected eyes as you whip your head around anxiously, before gesturing for Neuvillette to bend down. He complies, and matches himself to your height, yet immediately pauses any motion as soon as he feels your lips brush against his forehead. You brush a stray lock of his behind his reddened ears, a grin curving on your lips.

“Don’t be too disappointed, okay? I don’t want it to rain on my way back home~” You beam slyly as you lean away, witnessing Neuvillette’s expression undergo several stages - downcast, shocked, flustered… and then a small smile graces his expression.

“I’ll see you when I get home. Don’t wait up for me. The case might run late.” Neuvillette chuckles to himself, straightening his posture as he softly pinches your cheek, laughing at the way you begin to pout. It’s something the melusines told him to do, and he’s glad he listened - your face is soft, and he has to hold himself back from kissing you. He can hear people around the corner, their voices growing closer. “Get home safe.”

“Love?” Whenever the dragon enters home, he’ll call you by the name he’s unable to call you anywhere else - something he loathes with a burning sensation in his chest. “Are you…” His voice fades as he sees you curled up on the couch, eyes closed and chest slowly rising and falling with every breath. Had you tried to stay up for him? Cute. He takes you in his arms and brings you to the bedroom, carefully arranging the pillows and blankets around your sleeping form. You stir in your state, lids slowly fluttering open as you stare at the man above you with drowsy eyes.

“Neuvi?” The use of his nickname makes his heart flutter. It’s utterly incomparable to what you call him at work, “Sir Neuvillette.” Too rigid. You giggle at the sight of him, still half-asleep, and cup his face in your hands. “Welcome home… did I fall asleep? Ah, I’m sorry, I guess I was too tired…?”

The smile on his face won’t leave.

Yes, moments like these allowed him to continue this strange human practice.

He places his hands on yours, reveling in your warmth.

“Sleep, love.” ₊˚ෆ

— Wriothesley’s used to being professional. If he wasn’t, his work would be a lifetime more demanding than it was at the moment - although, perhaps even that’d be easier than keeping himself away from you until watchful eyes are no longer present.

He’s touchy whenever he’s with you. He likes leaning into your figure, even if you’re shorter than him, just to take in the way you embrace him back, but he loves the feeling of your fingers with his even more. It makes him feel… giddy, light, like he could drift away with the slightest breeze.

And that’s an issue. In order for you to remain safe, he’ll have to stay hushed about you being his lover. He’s made enemies, that much is natural. Of course, he’ll comply with your wishes to keep the relationship private. You could tell him to eat dirt and he’d do just that. Things like that are second nature now. Before, he had no trouble lasting weeks, or months in the Fortress of Meropide at once. After all, there was no driving incentive to head back to the city of Fontaine other than greeting the melusines, dropping off official papers, or, his guilty pleasure, ordering bags upon bags of tea from the mainland, so that he’d have more than enough to drink at the fortress. Now that you were here, however, how could he possibly stay away longer than a few days? If your hands in his were what made him float away, your smile brought him back, with a racing heart in his chest and a smile spread across his features. He’d give the world to see your smile, since it was his world. A single laugh from you would cause the background to fade to white, and rouse his heart and face into a flustered mess.

The prisoners notice a difference. Of course, they don’t know who this mysterious person the duke is seeing, but all they know is that they’re certainly working wonders. On miraculous, wondrous days, they'll even catch a glimpse of a smile on his face while he’s sitting at his desk, sifting through paperwork. As time passes, the news only grows more widespread, eventually reaching the ears of the ludex himself. It’s true, there is an apparent change - one that he captures on the duke’s more frequent visits to land. For a while, fables and tales of Wriothelsey’s mysterious lover spread throughout the city from ear to ear in hushed, excited whispers.

He’ll tease you about it, of course, but he’s really just rather intrigued. Has he really changed that much after meeting you? He doesn’t think so, but he wouldn’t put it past himself. “Darling, darling…” He repeats your petname when you don’t immediately react. “Darling, c’mon…” He can feel the pout creeping on his lips.

“Impatient, are we, Wrio?” You sigh as you turn away from your work, and his icy eyes light up in an instant. You stroke your hand through his hair gently, carding your fingers through the soft, dark strands, and you can see the way Wriothelsey simply melts under your touch. “You’ve been seeking me quite often these days, haven’t you?”

Maybe he has changed. Staring up at you with half-lidded eyes and a smile playing on his lips, feeling his ears warm, perhaps that conjecture has been solidified as the truth.

“Is it so wrong to wish for you, darling?”

(a/n) ngl i kinda hate this fanfic. everything about it. everyone seems so ooc and the prompt is barely even mentioned ew ew ew not my best work by far please dont tell me writers block is coming back i hate that big bad scary thing

໒꒱ || ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ (open! send an ask or a comment ♡) : @manager-of-the-pudding-bank, @iamdedinside, @ilyuu, @achlysis, @swivy123, @scara-is-my-wife

[lovelyyandereaddictionpoint]

Hellooo may I ask if you plan to continue the kny cats series?

KNY Kitties | 4

Sooner than the quadruple had liked your friend had returned and was eager to take her cats home

And while the sad mews from the kittens broke your heart it was nice to see the Magenta and Waterbug reclaim their role as guardians

Once again alternating between following you around the house and watching the kittens

While you’d like to say all was back to normal it was not

The blonde Turkish angora with rainbow eyes seemed to be finding himself at your place more often 

With a new friend named Snowflake 

Turns out your friend who owned him did return from her trip 

But she had fallen in love with the idea of traveling and had convinced her boyfriend to do the same

Which meant you were left to take care of both of their cats for the foreseeable future

As disappointing as that was having the new short hair around helped balance everyone out

Keeping the mischievous Angora busy 

Otherwise, life was good 

You were hanging out even longer with your new landlord

And cracking down on the only cat that seems to be escaping from your home:

“Okay, my babies! I’ll see you all in a bit I just have to make a quick run! Behave please!”

The sound of your voice suddenly disappearing behind the door caught everybody off guard. As far as they were concerned you were just getting a snack in the kitchen, you’d said so after getting up from cuddling with Magenta. The kittens who had previously tried to fall asleep beside Giyuu immediately snapped awake to go to the door to mew sadly. As though their crying would bring you back they held their little protest for a few minutes, deciding to sit by the door to wait. Giyuu figured he’d check on them before speaking to Muzan who was taking this opportunity to rub himself all over your clothes. 

“Oi Muzan. Aren’t you stretching yourself too thin?//”

Without looking up the former demon king only intensified his scent smothering. 

“How so?//”

“All week you’ve been jumping between being a cat and the ‘landlord’s son.’ Is there no stress on your body to be switching so often?//”

“No, I’m as infallible as I was in the past.//”

Giyuu hides the distasteful flicking of his tail at the prideful assumption. He didn’t really care if Muzan was caught, he was only worried about the rest of them transforming. If that time were to come.

“Ne ne Akaza-chan! Who do you think will be transforming next?”

The striped short hair groaned trying to slink away from Doma as they entered the bedroom. Giyuu’s ears twitched as he made his move to stay on the bed. Better to stay out of their way but still watch the Uppermoons.

“For all you know, it could be me!”

“Please we’d all be in trouble if it’s you.”

“Why wouldn’t you like it if we all go and live with our Master?”

Muzan perked up from the folded clothes to do his best to glare at his subordinates continuing to make biscuits on them. 

“I wouldn’t let you live with me.”

“What?! Master why?!”

“(Y/n) would get the wrong idea about me and I will not have you disrupting my relationship with them.”

“How mean! Would you say the same with Akaza?”

“....No.”

“Whhyyyy?!”

Giyuu refused to say anymore jumping off the bed to the front door. He planned to check on the quiet kittens rather than listen to the useless drivel that was this conversation. He hoped none of it would be considered true. But if this was going off of physical prowess from their past lives that would be a likely scenario rather than Tanjiro. Giyuu was disappointed to see that Tanjiro hadn’t had the same changes he noticed Muzan was having before he first transformed. 

When he finally entered the kitchen and doorway of the house he found the kittens precariously stacked on each other while standing on the counter, attempting to grab some treats. Recently you’ve been trying to teach the kittens some commands and tricks. Unfortunately for you, the kittens were smart enough to wish they could have those treats all the time. 

“Tanjiro, Nezuko, Rui! What are you all doing?//”

A series of ‘uh oh’ and hushed whispers told him all he needed to know. Easily he hopped up on the counter to safely break up the little stack they had going on. They proceeded to whine and complain as he sent a scathing look to all of them–specifically at Tanjiro.

“Tanjiro what is this? I would’ve expected more from you.”

“It’s just that they were both hungry and they were crying–”

“That’s no reason to do this. If you’re so hungry you’ll wait until (Y/n) gets home.”

“But–”

“No, buts. Off the counter.”

But of course, as the kittens begin to slink away preparing for the drop-down, Muzan intervenes. 

“What seems to be the problem.”

Giyuu prepares to speak only to be beaten by Rui. Who proudly tattles as though Giyuu was in the wrong. 

“The old man says we can’t eat even though we’re hungry!”

“--Hey!”

Muzan probably already aware of the true situation coyly sits at the bottom of the counter. 

“Well, that’s not right then.” 

With a smooth snapping of bones, the human form of Muzan stood tall and more than able to reach for the treats. The kittens cheered letting out happy mews as he opened the bag and began leaving some food out. Giyuu groaned in the only way a cat can. 

It is then his dark blues spot the small device above the refrigerator.

“Mu—!//”

Before he could get it out the door swung open. It is then that Muzan turns completely naked to look horrified at the main doorway where you had your phone’s light flashing with a picture and your jaw hanging open. 

“OH MY G–”

[melminli]

Devil's Advocate II

pairing: hazbin hotel x fem. reader

summery - after you died, you didn't really find it surprising to end up in hell. though, what you did find quiet amusing was that your life down here sucked just a bit less than the one before.

word count: 1.5k

contains: cursing, strong language, sinner reader, violence, religious themes (obviously), sexual themes, demon horniness

part I

"So...ya and that pretty lady over there seemed to be pretty tight, if ya know what I mean." Angel Dust asked curiously, ready to hear some tea. He grinned as he tilted his head to the side flirtatiously. "She some ex of yours, or somethin' like that?"

Husker just looked at him with his usual grim look while he was cleaning a few glasses. Then his gaze briefly wandered away to your figure, who was forced to deal with the Radio Demon and the Princess of Hell. Yeah, you haven't really been successful in getting out of this hotel yet.

"None of your business." He said with his monotone voice and let Angel hang his head in disappointment. "...I'm far too sober for this shit."

A groan could be heard. "Oh, come on, ya grumpy cat! Don't leave me high and dry, I know there's some good story to be heard!"

Before Husker could leave him hanging one more time, a red demon manifested next to them, much to their surprise. "I would also like to hear this good story, if you wouldn't mind sharing it with us, my good friend!" Alastor expressed his interest and looked menacingly at the barkeeper for a few seconds to make it clear that he did not have the privilege of turning his request down.

Fuck you, Larry. This is all your fault. "...we go back a long way." He reluctantly shared the information. "She was obsessed with money back then too, so I saw her in the same casino as me sometimes. Though, she died a long time before me, so I've only really known her since I went to hell." He summarized as briefly as possible.

Angel Dust raised an eyebrow. "That's it?" He asked, a little disappointed, even though he hadn't expected the man in front of him to be a good storyteller. "How did she die?"

Cat eyes looked a little nervously at the two people in front of him, while he didn't make a sound. How unfortunate, Alastor thought to himself, and his sharp teeth showed as he understood the situation. "Looks like Husker isn't allowed to tell us this information. That's very interesting! Very interested indeed..." He laughed, and his creepy gaze shifted briefly to your figure. "Seems like we need to find out directly from the source."

The once Overlord looked over at Angel Dust with slight concern and saw how the spiders' eyes were also glancing towards your form. It wasn't that he didn't trust you, but demons as reckless as him fell into your trap like flies to a web. Besides, it wasn't like he was on your best side right now. "I'd be careful." He said to the crowd even though he didn't give a rat's ass about Alastor. "She's not known for making packs with demons left and right for nothing, and I can assure you there's not the slightest chance of escaping from her contracts once you're in it." He said and added. "That's the price for holding up her end of the deal without any sneaky tricks, I suppose."

Well, that sounded unusual. After all, it was normal that one Demon after another stabbed the other in the back, there was no such thing as trusting the other person's word. But maybe that was why you were so popular. "Calm down, I'm not gonna sell my soul to her." Angel laughed. I couldn't even if I wanted to.

Husker placed another clean glass on the counter. "It doesn't have to be your soul. She'll find something she wants from you, and she's good with her mouth, so you'll give it to her. They all do in the end." He said and reached for a bottle of whiskey, ignoring the two incredulous looks he received. He took a sip and was initially confused as to what was going on with the two until he realized what he had said and choked on his drink. "Words! I meant to say words, damn it." He corrected himself.

Alastor didn't blink for a few seconds, and Angel, on the other side, just laughed amusedly. Maybe he wasn't so wrong with his first guess, after all. "Of course ya were."

"Well, thank you for your kind hospitality, but I'm afraid that I'll be taking my leave now." You spoke to the two girls. As much as Charlie regretted it, she couldn't convince you to spend a few nights at the Hazbin Hotel. Apart from the fact that she would have had a new guest, it might have enhanced the hotel's reputation if someone as renowned as you had visited. Though, unfortunately that didn't work out.

I've messed up again. Charlie tried not to look too depressed, even though she really was an open book. "Oh, all right. Thanks for listening to me."

You smiled while rubbing her shoulder. "Of course, darling." You replied, but that didn't really seem to cheer her up. You couldn't help but be a little gentler with her, she had a good heart for a hell born. "Let's make a deal." You suggested to her as an idea popped into your head.

Right after the sentence came out of your mouth, Vaggie narrowed her eyes and stepped protectively in front of her girlfriend. "Charlie doesn't make deals with demons like you." She said protectively, and you leaned closer to her at what she said. Your pupils narrowed to slits and two more eyes opened menacingly on your face. "What do you mean with demons like me, little lady, hm?" You asked her as the light in the room began to flicker, and you saw her continue to stand her ground, even though you could smell the slight fear emanating from her.

You pulled back again and returned to your normal self. "I'm just kidding, I know I'm a greedy bitch." You laughed out and saw how Vaggies eye twitch in irritation while Charlie laughed along a little uncomfortably. "Well, even though I wouldn't mind making an official deal with the little princess, I was thinking more of a friendly kind of deal." You suggested. "I'll put in a good word if the subject of your hotel comes up with anyone I know, and in return, I'd just like to ask you for a teeny tiny favor."

That didn't sound so bad. It would be good for their image if someone like you would spread a few good things about the hotel. Before Charlie could agree, Vaggie straddled back in. "And what does this favor involve?"

You conjured up a collar with a bell and an old Poloroid camera with a snap of your fingers. "Make Husk wear this and take lots of photos of it. Preferably of the process too, 'cause I'm working on some thank you cards for my company." You say and put the two things in her hands. You then remembered something. "Oh! And give this to him too." You added and handed Charlie a piece of paper. "That bastard owes me sixty thousand dollars 'cause of that Berry guy, or whatever his name was."

You were about to turn around and walk to the door when you met two red eyes right in front of you. "Leaving us so soon, what a shame." Said the Radio Demon with a smile as you took a step back so that you were no longer face to face. "Your presence turned out to be quite entertaining, I too had secretly hoped that you would give our great hotel a chance." He announced, pointing his funny stick at you.

You pushed it aside with your finger. "Well, thank you, Blossom, but I'm afraid my presence is in demand at other places." You pronounced not very regretfully.

He raised an eyebrow and would find your nicknames more amusing if he'd understood the reference. "And where would that be?"

You looked neutral. "I actually have a massage appointment at six. See you then." You said goodbye and went away with a poof after you clapped with your hands.

A few seconds of silence passed after you disappeared, and Vaggie looked at the objects in her hands again, a little questioningly. "So, what's the best way to go about this?" She asked Charlie, who was already looking thoughtfully at the bar. "Let's ask him first. Maybe he's in a good mood."

Vaggie looked at the man in question and saw him drinking a large bottle of alcohol before throwing it in the back to get his hands on another one. "Sweetie, do you know Husk?"

[boyfiejay]

Enhypen : Telling them a story but it doesnt make sense

PAIRING : OT7 x gn! Reader

GENRE : established relationship, fluff, crack

Warning : curse words

Author's note : this is requested, why do i get the motivation to write in library? Of all the places, the place where im supposed to study...

Heeseung

●'Babe you know the other day i went to walk my fish but the baby started to bark and i realised that it was the wrong day!'

●Looks you dead in the eye

●Just stares at you even after you finish talking

●'I cant tell if im sleep deprived or you arent making any sense'

●Would take him him 1 2 3 4000 business days to understand it was a prank

●You woukd just tell him to go sleep lmao

Jay

●'So I was planting the book and the turtle drowned so i put the heater in the frigde.'

●Bro just freezes trying to understand what you're saying

●'Excuse me?'

●Just confusion on his face and youre laughing your ass off

●Also would not understand how that prank works but it worked on him so...

●Would make fun of you 100% 😭

Jake

●'So tell me why when the cat was barking and my ears went blind so i put the curtains in the dishwasher.'

●Baby is so confused, like he has imaginary question marks floating around his head

●'What do you mean baby?'

●Trying so hard to not seem rude incase hes the one who doesnt understand you :(((

●Breaths out a sigh of relief when he realises it was a prank

●But then lowk gets mad that he was tricked lol 😭

Sunghoon

●'Hey, remember when me and my grandma went to mop the ocean and the cat had puppies so i blow dried the air?'

●Already knows its some kind of prank but hes still confused

●'What the fuck?'

●Cue your hysteric laughing because why does he look cute with that confused expression???

●Impressed by your randomness lowk but will not say it

●Will get back at you for this💯

Sunoo

●'You remember when i couldnt hear in my nose and i woke up and the dog laid eggs?'

●Is concerned for you more than hes confused

●'Are you okay, baby?'

●You cant even laugh at him he genuinely looks worried

●You tell him its a joke and he gives you the nastiest side eye

●But then laughs at how random that sentence was

Jungwon

●'Tell me why, when i was walking my penguin and i lost my toes so i watered the fish.'

●He is the most confused by far but also judging you at the same time

●'Baby, what the heck? What penguin?'

●Hes concerned about penguins more than your mental state and toes😐

●Starts laughing when you tell him its a prank

●'Stop watching those tiktoks.'

Ni-ki

●'Remember when the snail barked and my leg cut off because i had a headache so i preheat the ice.'

●Just stares at you with 🤨 face

●Is judging you so hard it makes you want to take back your words

●'Whats that supposed to mean, baby?'

●Can NAWT understand why people make pranks like this

[thekeeperof-thefandoms]

How they react to finding out you're an animal lover

Based on the actual Zoo's worth of pets, I acquired.

Let's assume somehow there's a scenario where the Hazbin Characters are able to see your life on earth, to review what might have gotten you sent to Hell. As far as most of them were concerned, you may have been chaotic, maybe you jumped to violence quickly (it's Hell though so defending yourself is important), maybe you drank or used drugs or slept around, but not to an extent that would warrant Hell.

And it's not that you aren't capable of being friendly or nice, but you're always wary of new people. You seem uncomfortable in large groups and tend to stick to people you know and unfortunately have Resting Bitch Face, so aren't very approachable.

So imagine their reaction to seeing your life and noticing from a young age your obsession with animals. You watched Animal Cops instead of Cartoons as a kid (and boy, your little brain sure got creative when imagining how best to punish [torture] animal abusers. Even Alastor's impressed by the level of violence). You begged and cried for a pet your whole childhood and did your best with the fish you got or the guinea pigs, though poor misinformation from adults and lack of proper husbandry being available in easily accessible media meant that your setups were....lackluster. And boy did you literally sob over that as an adult.

Every animal you met, horse, snake, cat, dog, rabbit, rodent, lizzard, frog, fish, they were all met with the brightest smile, a gentle cooing voice, happy baby talk, you getting on their level to coddle and and pet. The total opposite of your response to people.

Alastor

He's never been a big fan of dogs, especially after his death. But watching you with the numerous dogs you owned, the bond you shared with them, how they weren't perfectly trained but you tried so hard, and they all lived such long happy lives, he thinks he would have tolerated it. Especially your first dog, a small yappy thing that was wonderfully trained to do many tricks using just hand signals. Watching you shut down, breaking into billions of pieces when that dog died is probably the closest his smile has come to dropping.

Cats though, Alastor adored cats and you, despite being allergic, took in every feline in need. Even ones with health issues. You shelled out your hard earned cash left and right and the once ratty, crusty, scrawny, timid, strays blossomed into sleek, healthy, playful cats. He's going to laugh at all the curse words that arise from the various shenanigans that come with owning cats though.

As for your snakes, he's not phased. He isn't particularly fond of them, but he isn't scared either. But he could listen to you gush for hours about genetics, morphs, breeding, and proper set ups. He liked your bearded dragon though. Would get one for you if he could.

His favorite though was your rats. The quartet of rodents that were as smart as human toddlers and as likely to get in trouble. Watching you build and construct cardboard play structures, teach them tricks, feed them all sorts of fruits, veggies, meat, grains, insects. The constant cleaning and remodeling of their cage to entertain them. Oh you clearly adored them. Especially since they lived longer than their average 4 year expectancy by a whole year, with the exception of one rat that had been born ill but he still lived to by nearly 3!

All in all he just thinks you're precious, is amused by your entirely sincere and intensely violent response to abusers, and admires your caring nature and dedication (it reminds him of his ma, working hard to shell out every penny to ensure he thrived). He's probably considering getting you a pet.

Charlie

Heart eyes! You're so soft and cuddly with your pets! So patient with them, even when they're still adjusting, scared and prone to biting. You take every bite, scratch, hiss, growl, and in cases like snakes and turtles musking, in stride. Sure you flinch but your tone stays calm, you relax quickly, adjust your approach.

The way your eyes water and light up when the black cat with a stiff limp and crusted eyes, and swollen cheeks finally approaches you instead of hiding behind the water heater in your basement after you managed to trap it in indoors melts her heart. The way you have to visibly control yourself when you pet it for the first time and then finally lift him into your arms to take upstairs where the heat works and you aren't relying on a space heater and old blankets to warm him.

She's not thrilled about your violent tendencies, but they also remind her of Vaggie. Your protective and have strong feelings about injustice and she admires that.

She's definitely asking you to watch Kiki more often.

Angel Dust

Another proud pet parent! He gets you. Animals are so much easier than people. He loves watching you dress your pets that would tolerate it and take them to get pictures done, sending them to family members like you would send pictures of your kids. And hey, they essentially are! He's gonna ask you to dress up Fat Nuggets with him and do a photo shoot!

He's not a fan of rodents, but you're rats, and the hamsters were cute. He thinks he'd be ok with them if he met them, may even enjoy them.

Really liked watching your fish tank though once you got older and had more understanding and were able to set up a proper one. Even when things went wrong like algae blooms, fish fighting, your $35 betta beaching itself on your crabs basking platform, you were determined, and eventually you get a nice little live planted tank going that's mostly self sufficient and some fish that breed. You never quite mastered the algae issue, but it never overran your tank again, so he considers it a win. It's just cute watching you try so hard and dedicate so much time too it.

Lucifer

You're literally his spirit animal. He would rather be around animals than people, too. And honestly, you're right, animal abusers are the worst and he's probably taking notes from you on fitting punishments. He is trying to be more active as a ruler of Hell now.

He thinks you're incredibly smart for learning and memorizing so much about animals at such a young age and that you learn more as you get older, keeping up with proper care techniques. Kinda shocked you didn't become a vet, but also gets it. He doesn’t think he could handle having to let an animal down either. Or deal with stupid owners.

Gets heart eyes when he sees your obsession with snakes and is genuinely sad for you when your small collection of them dies off. Reptiles are hard, even professional keepers can have snakes die for seemingly no reason, so it's not anything you did, but it still sucks that within a 16 months you lost both your corn snakes and then a 8 or 9 months later your ball python.

He's the Serpent of Eden so anytime you had a snake draped around her neck, coiled around your wrist or arm, anytime they slithered under your shirt or up your pant leg while holding them is giving him inappropriate ideas. If you're someone with sensory stim needs and you loved the feeling of snake scales on your skin he'll offer to be one for a while (he's gonna go in your shirt and probably just coil around your waist or your chest, maybe rest his head on your shoulder peeking out of your shirt, blepping).

He's also sad that you can't see your beloved pets now since you're in Hell and it makes him even more bitter towards Heaven. Your beloved pets deserved to be reunited with an owner who gave them everything they could and you deserved to see the furry little wonders that got you through your darkest times. He can't imagine how much pain you were in when you realized you wouldn't see them again.

Is determined to get you a pet and find a way to reunite you with yours.

Husk

Was never big on pets before, but he thinks yours are cute. He may let you pet his ears more often now and be more comfortable purring around you. If it helps you feel better since it's obvious you miss your little furballs.

The entire time they're watching your life play out your eyes are glued to your pets, eyes misty, and smile adoring. It's more of a highlights reel so you're constantly babbling over it telling story after story. You mention how pissed you were tattoos didn't show up when you died because you had every pet you ever owned's (with the exception of ones you had really young), pawprint tatted on you when you died, staring with the rat tail and feet at your ankle and the top of your foot all the way up your leg, hip, side, so many of them it looked like a zoo walked across your body.

He misses having that kind of enthusiasm and devotion to something and admires you for being able to so deeply love and care for your pets despite what you've been through.

He maybe feels a little inspired himself to open up a bit more.

Vox

He grew up when a wife, two kids, a dog, and a white pickett fence was a standard, but you go beyond that. Animal care has gotten so much more detailed since he was alive. Aside from his sharks, especially Vark, he doesn’t really know much about pets, though.

He loves your commitment to trying to keep a fish tank, but he is going to critique you. He probably will get you one and help you set it up, a nice, moderately sized 50 gallon. It's something you two can bond over.

Watching you step between two dogs about to get into a fight because their owners were drinking at the dog park and didn't pay attention nearly gives him a stroke though. But you effortlessly snag an 80 pound mutt and lift them up and pivot, using your arms and legs to corral that dog back towards the fence and keep yourself between them while someone else snags the other dog. Once both dogs can't see each other anymore and you have effectively redirected their attention to the treats you brought, using a stern, sharp voice to direct it to sit, the dogs settle. He can visibly see you seething as the guy gets up, uncaring, and leashes his dog to leave the park.

Also thinks it adorable when watches you pull over and dart across a highway to get a turtle out of the road. Or to get a baby bird out of the street once it's been pushed from the nest. Watches you circle back to watch dogs you see wandering the neighborhood to see if they're lost. You approaching gently and sweetly, not even remotely upset when they startle and you nearly get bit. You apologized to the dog for spooking it.

Really, he just thinks you're cute and have no self-preservation and doesn't think a dog or cat would do well in the tower, but lizzards and fish are ok, and you two bond over the fish tank.

Valentino

So if that whole thing about him getting one of the little insect dogs and then shooting it within a day thing is still canon, he's probably lowkey afraid for his life right now. There's just something about watching an year old version of you say you might wanna be an animal cop so you can shoot bad people with such a serious face. Listening to teenage you threaten two boys who had joked about pouring chemicals on a cat with jamming an anti-freeze bottle down their throats and water board them with it. Or offer to toss puppy mill breeders in a cage too small, no ac, no heat, no food, no water, naked and in their own filth while walk by them every day. He can't even repeat the threats you made against dog fighters or cock fighters. He's pretty sure Satan, prince of Wrath himself, is scared of you. How does a 13 year old come up with shit that twisted?! Like maybe you're in Hell for a reason you fucking psycho.

But! Assuming that's not true, I think Valentino wants to be a cat person. He thinks they're elegant and fashionable. But watching yours he realizes if you're lucky they're snuggly, mischievous, trouble makers who even without trying can and will fuck shit up. If you're not lucky, their terrorists that get into everything, bite you for attention then run off when you pet them, get hair everywhere, are literally so fucking messy, and somehow are both incredibly smart and incredibly stupid. Like smart enough to open doors and drawers and plastic treat containers, dumb enough to run into a window or jump in the dryer.

Honestly, he is shocked to learn that he's a snake/rodent kinda guy. Literally, the snakes are so pretty, have such smooth textures, and yeah, they can be derpy, but he thinks they're kinda hot. Like the image of you, the four-foot ball python draped around your neck and chest. Or some of your bigger five and six foot snakes. He likes the idea of maybe doing like a naked photo shoot with the snake wrapped around you. (HE AND LUCIFER SHOULD NOT SHARE KINKS BUT HERE WE ARE).

Personality wise, hyper, gets into things he shouldn't, bored easily, needs attention or gets depressed and stressed, too smart for his own good but too dumb to get himself out of trouble. This man is a rat/ferret. Whatever irony made him a moth demon is dumb. He would have adored the little fuckers. Maybe not by himself, he doesn’t have the time or attention span to dedicate to them alone, but with your help caring for them and playing with them, he'd be great.

In general I don't think Val is the kinda of person who would get a pet for himself or should have one, but if you're helping and it makes you happy he'll do it. He got Angel one after all.

[ariespetal]

i heard you wish to be talked to about komahina. my time has arrived. i’m going to use this as an excuse to dump postgame headcanons on you :)

i think they take care of each other in a lot of really subtle ways. hajime for sure overworks himself a lot so nagito will trick him into taking breaks by asking him for help with little unimportant things like crosswords or choosing which book he should read next- then once he’s got hajime’s attention he gets him to sit down and chat and bam now he’s taken a break. he’s also like the only one who can get hajime to go to bed when he’s up way too late working on something. along a similar vein hajime will make sure nagito is eating enough by bringing him fruits and nuts and such :) he for sure gets lectured about drinking enough water especially since he still insists on wearing a jacket on a tropical island

they’re both migraine sufferers but nagito in particular is prone to getting auras with his migraines. they are very used to keeping their cottage dark and quiet when someone’s feeling under the weather and they go through painkillers faster than anyone else on the island (which is almost concerning bc they are far from the only ones on the island who deal with chronic pain)

hajime naturally runs warm and nagito naturally runs cold. as a result hajime sleeps in just his boxers whereas nagito has a whole pajama set he changes into each night. hajime will sprawl out in his sleep and nagito clings onto him like a koala. it’s actually a very efficient system for them they regulate each others’ temperatures

they help each other through their rough days and are better equipped than any of their peers to help each other. it’s the mutual understanding and seeing themselves in each other. when hajime’s dissociating or feeling especially guilty nagito’s able to help remind him of who he is and all the people he’s been able to help since getting out of the nwp. when nagito’s doomspiraling or feeling especially worthless hajime’s the only one who can reliably snap him out of it and remind him that he’s loved and safe. they’re not perfect and they both still struggle but they’re able to bring each other comfort

their arguments can be NASTY (especially at first when they’re still just starting to recover) but they’re bad at apologizing with words so they find other ways to make it up to each other- usually acts of service or little gifts. when hajime feels bad he’ll bring nagito his favorite snacks or recommend him new books or try to find ways to upgrade the spaces on the island he knows nagito likes to use. when nagito feels bad he’ll clean and organize spaces meticulously and try to use his luck to find something important hajime would be able to use in a project. eventually when they start learning to communicate with each other a little better they start doing silent apologies with little acts of physical affection- they’ll sit down next to each other and gently lean against each other or place their hand over the other’s and squeeze, etc. they never get good at saying “i’m sorry” but they get good at showing and understanding it

nagito once tried to make hajime a cake for his birthday. it was a miracle he didn’t burn anything down and the end result was inedible but hajime really appreciated the sentiment anyways. nagito was banned from being in kitchens unsupervised after this, which he agreed was reasonable. hajime (and teruteru probs) has since tried to give him cooking lessons but he just. he isn’t good at it. he’s trying his best but dear god is it bad

when they’re lounging nagito will just. drape himself over hajime like a cat. it is very common to find nagito resting his head on hajime’s chest in a lounge chair or laying across his lap reading a book on a sofa. it embarrasses hajime a little bit when nagito does this in public but they’re both so touch starved that he doesn’t say shit bc he knows they both need the affection. (and if he not-so-secretly enjoys running his hands through nagito’s hair and feeling him relax, well, who can blame him?)

ok this is getting rambly i’m gonna stop here. i love talking about komahina and i love postgame komahina especially so thank you for enabling me there. hope this helps satisfy the itch in your brain as well. it’s all about the learning to heal and love and grow happy together to me. waaaaaauuuughh they’ve been through so much they deserve to be able to do nothing together <333 komahina,,,,, yeagh

YESSSS these are all so good I live for post-game komahina 🥺

They’re so wonderful for each other, I love the idea of them getting over their disagreements and taking care of one another, literally soulmates dude :’)

Anyways I’m rotating all of these headcanons around in my brain thank you for this 🙏🫡 (and I just had to draw out koala-komaeda, I’m glad everyone agrees this is how they sleep)

[bonefall]

i know u dont rework arcs untill theyre complete but im very excited to see what you do with a starless clan, theres so much exciting things happening in this arc to work with. do you have any changes you already know for sure you’ll be incorporating?

No for-sures. I don't want to make any for-sures. I have ones I'm feeling but I don't want to call ANYTHING a for-sure yet. I need to find out what the ending is, WHERE this is all going, because I have a strong philosophy in my writing that a story is like a spear;

IT'S ALL ABOUT GETTING TO THE POINT.

But we are 4/6 of the way in, so I CAN start talking about thoughts!

I'm actually leaning pretty heavily towards axing Nightheart as a POV. There's still time for the books to turn around and justify it, BUT HEAR ME OUT

(Saying AS someone who is a Nightheart Enjoyer)

So far I'm really feeling that his character would benefit from us never being inside of his head, or seeing what he's been going through. As much as I WILL stand by that I enjoyed books 1 and 2 and liked his perspectives there, I'm starting to think that it would serve the story a lot better for Sunbeam and Frostpaw to be guessing just as much as we are.

We'd get introduced to Nightheart on the journey for catmint.

Sunbeam connects with him immediately, because she's tossed on this mission while she's in the middle of a swirling tide of drama. With nothing but Clerics and a hardened Rootspring to the left and her ex-bestie (exstie) to the right, he's really her only other choice for companionship. She's chronically unable to stop problems before they get out of hand, the sort of person who becomes frozen by indecision, and then here comes this Glorious Bastard

In her eyes, he's so caring, and bold, and fun! He's the first one to jump headlong into danger, to really be interested in her problems and just let her talk, and his story is so heartbreaking! A mother who's so hard on him... and his Clan is so mean all the time, but he wants to prove to all of them that he's more than just Firestar's descendant... but he was so brave to choose his own name.................

And then, when she follows him into ThunderClan, she learns he fucking lied. She changed Clans based on SOB STORIES

When she first comes, no one knows what he's been saying behind their back. Even if they did, they don't want to start trashing Nightheart right to his new mate's face. But then he LEAVES, and Sunbeam will bring up,

"Maybe it was because you were hard on him?"

And then Sparkpelt tries to agree, just to take blame onto herself and stop all this, but Finchlight's had eNOUGH and ends up setting the record straight;

"No this is DEFINITELY another tantrum. He already ran off once before."

"NO he didn't pick his own name, he stopped the whole ceremony to complain and Bramblestar gave him a compromise"

"MEAN to him?? I had to do HIS WORK because he couldn't STAY ON THE GROUND"

"Oh he's buckling under the weight of his legacy? that must be so hard. I was cat-fifteen when i punched my first fascist and he was wearing the face of my grandpa."

"His mom aba-WHAT?? ABANDONED???? OUR MOTHER WAS EXILED AND HE STAYED HOME!!!!! WE WERE CAT-FIFTEEN!!"

With this false hope shattered, Sunbeam is thrown into a devastating situation where... her mother was right. She was tricked. And now she's stuck in this new Clan without any of her old friends, without this mate who was too-good-to-be-true, the ONE impulsive choice she's made on her own in her WHOLE LIFE turns to ashes in her mouth. She can't go back, either, because Berryheart would NEVER let her live this down.

But... it's okay.

It's a slow shock, to make a choice SO impulsive and SO self-concerned, and find a safety net below her. It's going to be okay. The trials are fair. The cats of ThunderClan interrupt and speak over each other, but, that teaches her to be more assertive. Sparkpelt and Finchlight are not the mean assholes that Nightheart built them up to be, and they'll support her no matter what she chooses to do with her possible mate.

I want Nightheart TO get better, but, in order for that to happen, he has to face, and, more importantly, ACCEPT consequences. He needs to develop the maturity to say, "I acted like a brat and didn't appreciate what I had. and I'm sorry. you don't have to forgive me."

Bottom line being, Nightheart is striking me lately as a character that works best as unpredictable, because we have NO IDEA what's truly in his head. It would be interesting for him to have a novella later, but as it stands, his POV has consistently just been a duplicate since he joined ShadowClan. We gained NOTHING from splitting the Frostpaw Journey of the newest book in half POV, and VERY little from splitting the ShadowClan one into half POV.

I might reduce the POVs to 2, just Sunbeam and Frostpaw, or change Nightheart's to Lightleap. If I NEED 3 main characters, then they should all be a consistent camera on different parts of the conflict.

Again. I do not commit to changes until the arcs are done. Nothing in BB!ASC is set yet.

But here's some other little things I'm thinking,

Bramblestar is VOTED out.

He does not step down. The little "game" he played with Nightheart to create a situation to yell at Squilf, who hasn't been his mate in a long time in BB, was the LAST straw for ThunderClan.

They had sympathy for him before that point, because of what he went through with Ashfur, but his leadership was long and controversial even before the Impostor.

And there's a really strong sentiment that IF Bramblestar had been a good leader... they would have realized he was possessed sooner. So, there are those who partially blame him for the tyranny of the Impostor.

Basically; enough is enough.

Berryheart's hate group has ACTUAL consequences. Someone gets killed; probably Antfur, who survived the last arc to die here.

More fights. This arc has been too bloodless. Already planning SEVERAL sudden, random brawls in RiverClan as tensions boil.

Heartstar is going to be MORE controversial. Not controversial enough in canon imo. I don't like how Leaf and Squilf seem like they have "hypothetical" issues with the invasion instead of being able to point at REAL ones.

riverclan didn't forget how to do the chores they've done their WHOLE lives, no. I'm going to talk about POWER VACUUMS and create ACTUAL factions that begin to coagulate in RiverClan.

if we're going to have a brainless plot about how "Well Ackshually democracy has enough problems to make us reconsider not having unaccountable, tyrannical dictators, because a vote could maybe be called over One Single Issue" then I'll talk about shit like the spoiler effect, mob mentality, and factionalism. Get the hell out of my way ERIN I'll cook

No Smoky. Society has progressed past the need for Smoky. No Smokyng Area.

Whistlepaw should to try and take care of her ALONE, not trained enough to take care of SUCH bad wounds and barely able to keep her trembling paws straight, and Frostpaw realizes that she's making her watch her own friend die.

Is this how her life is going to end? slipping away under the paws of someone she loves, for what? pride? to do what her mother told her-- trust no cat?

As she TRUSTS Whistlepaw? Trusts her SO much, that Frostpaw will force her to be the only witness to her death?

FROSTPAW CALLS THE HUMAN

...which in BB, is a team of researchers. She drags herself to them, and collapses. This is why they just HAPPENED to have the proper equipment on them; they're WILDLIFE VETS.

Not sure how I'm going to handle Frostpaw's Journey though. In BB, the Park Cats are already a foundational part of Clan Culture.

In all honesty, while I HAVE to praise the fact that the Erins have FINALLY created ONE outsider group that isn't malicious or defenseless... I don't much care for them.

sending frostpaw on a side quest to what's essentially a big DOTC reference. Look! It's that group we introduced in the last 5 chapters of our latest glorified recap! cooool.

We're just going to get nothing but fucking founders in every dream from now on. I'm SURE of it.

As a consolation prize to myself though I will be writing cool angel scenes of the absolute BEING that Riverstar has become in heaven.

Riverstar (normal cat): "Elder Bones I'm going out!"

"not dressed like THAT you're not!!!"

Riverstar (the manifestation of the river, the rain in the sky above, and the abyss below, and how through water we are all truly connected as one being): "better?"

I will probably keep the Park Cats and rework them significantly, but I'm leaning pretty heavily towards Frostpaw visiting a LOT of places. A holy pilgrimage.

ESPECIALLY one of the Tribe's three wards; the River Ward. The Tribe of Rushing Water believes (it's even in the name) that water connects all things.

So I think it would be really fitting for Frostpaw to learn from MANY perspectives, starting with this philosophy put forth by the River Ward.

And she realizes-- that's what Riverstar is, as well. As a being. He is mentoring her on this pilgrimage, while barely saying a word. She can feel him wherever she is, because he isn't JUST the God of the River.

He is connection. He is peace. He's water. Too much and you'd drown, not enough and you'd thirst.

EDIT FROM THE FUTURE: Here is the rough draft of Frostpaw's Journey

[nikoshinigami]

My Takes on KHR Pairings

No one asked for it, but I do so love me some character analysis and head-canons. So here are my personal justifications and thoughts on 8059, D18, 6927, and 10051

8059 This is canon, isn't it? I don't even need to explain how Gokudera is the pressure Yamamoto needs in his life to apply himself and Yamamoto is the grace Gokudera needs in his life to not be so hard on himself? Even their fighting styles support each other. They are dating in the manga as far as I'm concerned. If you didn't read the manga and think half the reason Gokudera was so loud about his hate for Yamamoto was basically Unresolved Sexual Tension and Gay Panic, then I can't help you. The canon speaks for itself, and it speaks loudly. Where most KHR pairings tend to be of the 'two sides of the same coin' verity, these two are opposites attract.

D18 Dino and Hibari have the same core values. They protect their territory, they inspire their subordinates, they are respected leaders, and they love a good fight. They both admire and respect individual potential and don't garner unrealistic expectations of others--they know there are exceptions and not everyone can rise to their level, but those who can had better get their act together.

Dino initially sees a wild and beautiful brat of a creature when he looks at Hibari but learns to see his kindness and fairness as he reflects on their similarities. Hibari sees a never-ending battle that in truth he hopes does go on forever, because he's never before had someone in his life who could break him down, bare and bloody, no tricks and no respect lost, day after day, and follow it up with the proper care after to ensure they can both continue in the morning. There's the rocky post-trauma start considering the last time Hibari thought he was walking into a fair fight, he was deceived, tortured, and kidnapped all thanks to mafia foolery (Fuck you, Mukuro~). But after a while in the woods, knowing this time he won't be left to rot with many of his bones broken, trust and respect are built and last a lifetime.

The man with the bronco on his arm hasn't broken in the wild creature, because he himself has been considered a force of nature and he knows it's best to let wild things run free. Hibari is allowed to be his weird, unintentionally funny, and aggressively possessive self, while Dino gets to bask in that feeling of being the only one at a house party that the cat will let pet it, seeing the softer side of Hibari that others might see but still never quite understand the meaning behind.

Respect and admiration turn to passion and reverence. Even if mafia politics only ever let it be sexual trysts, their mutual assertiveness makes it a high-adrenaline encounter that lets Dino really let loose and enjoy enforcing his dominance since his partner needs him to prove he's worthy every single time, even if only for pretense. Meanwhile, Hibari gets to be gentle and quietly seductive with Dino in ways no one would believe, relishing in the power he has over the allied Don even without lifting a finger. In the end, it's a power play for both of them that works because Hibari doesn't prioritize a win so much as he is enjoying each fight, and Dino, head of his territory's criminal organization by birthright, needs to feel like he earned it sometimes in a way only adversity can prove.

6927 Put each on either side of a window and they'd think they were looking in a mirror. Mukuro was a child abused by the mafia, his future stolen from him for its ambitions without any consideration for his own wants and desires, made close friends with others put in the same position as him, has a strong desire to protect those close to him even at the sacrifice of his own life and security, and tends to overcome adversity against the odds--prison even proving only an inconvenience as he continues to exist in the wider world mentally at least. Tsuna is a child currently facing abuse within the mafia, his future stolen from him because Vongola decided his fate without any consideration for his own wants and desires. He's made close friends with others now pulled into the mafia's schemes beside him, has a strong desire to protect those close to him even at the sacrifice of his own life and security, and tends to overcome adversity against the odds--even seasoned assassins failing to take him down. In the end, they both came to the same conclusion: the mafia is corrupt and should be burned to the ground. Mukuro has been planning the destruction of the mafia since childhood, and Tsuna told Primo he would not uphold those evils but tear it all down. Mukuro's abuse is exponentially more egregious than Tsuna's, but with that, his reactions and responses to that trauma are also more exaggerated. At the end of the day, though, you have Tsuna forced on a transformative journey, and Mukuro who, having been there and come through the other side, possesses the knowledge that there is no excuse good enough to excuse this and no punishment more fitting than annihilation.

Because of this, though, Mukuro has a kindness towards Tsuna. A curiosity. He recognizes the fact that the mafia as it exists will destroy Tsuna and try to reshape him into something else. He didn't know Tsuna before their fight--he expected someone like Xanxus, someone already made cruel and warped by ambition. He didn't know he was advancing Vongola's objectives by engaging with him, but in his defeat like saw like. Their mental bond is almost a subconscious reaction to guilt at being a pawn yet again in another mafia family's power play and wanting to warn against obeying the established authority presented to Tsuna. Mukuro refuses any show of vulnerability, but without thinking about it, has shown Tsuna that he cares about people and that he's suffering. Reborn does not want Tsuna to forget about Mukuro's crimes and to potentially stop seeing him as a threat just yet, but Tsuna has regret about the Vindice taking the Kokuyou crew back to prison--sees them rightfully as victims and wants better for them than more mafia 'justice' when it was the mafia that created them in the first place.

Tsuna, whether by their bond or his intuition, sees through Mukuro in a way no one else can. He can cut through his bullshit, recognize when he's lying or being obtuse to avoid vulnerability, and see the frown hidden behind the smile. Mukuro, on the other hand, keeps Tsuna from the evils of complacency. Cognitive dissonance makes it easier to stop fighting your morals and go along with what everyone else is telling you you have to do when you have no alternatives. His right hand is a mafia shill, his other friends trust him and the mentors who have gotten them this far which were supplied by the mafia. Mukuro alone can and will comment on the true moral failings of the mafia and has no reservations in doing so. If ever Tsuna needs to feel like he's doing the right thing, all he needs to do is look to Mukuro for confirmation.

Mukuro is also the only one Tsuna can let his guard down around fully as a mafia boss. Gokuders is a fixer--if Tsuna vents to him, Gokudera takes it upon himself to tackle the problem rather than simply listen. Yamamoto is an optimist--if Tsuna vents to him, Yamamoto tries to cheer him up and make him feel better. When Tsuna vents to Mukuro, it's shit talking time and every petty bone in the illusionist's body is happy to be in on the action. Gurl, go on~ He enjoys some catty behavior and acknowledging that a lot of people are the worst and everything sucks is a topic he is here for. Does it help anything? No. But Tsuna feels heard and seen and validated and that is important. They grow closer because it's only with Mukuro that Tsuna gets that validation and he trusts Mukuro's perspective because they understand where each other is coming from. And Mukuro is never so loyal as to hold back on telling him he's being a dumbass--something the others might refrain from doing out of respect for their Boss.

Neither of them has strong, familial bonds. Tsuna was neglected and Mukuro was.. given up to human experimentation. They both crave soft, cozy, warm love and affection. Cuddles on the couch, maintaining touch throughout sleep to feel assured the other is there and assure them of the same, gentle caresses and soft, sweet kisses. It's almost a platonic love where playing with each other's hands and fingers is a high level of intimacy. They could probably be fulfilled and happy and loved without sex in their relationship. Which is good, because Tsuna is trying so hard to conform to what he thinks a straight teenager should be, he hasn't even had time to figure out who he actually is, while Mukuro has spent his life so untrusting and full of hate, the question has never required an answer.

10051 If Amano had written Byakuran a backstory, this would be easier to defend. What is Byakuan's perfect world? What's wrong with the current world in his opinion? What is he? Where did he come from? These would be really helpful to know. But instead, we learn about him through Shouichi. We learn they went to the same university so Byakuran is likely similarly a mechanic/engineer--or my choice of physicist (theoretical) if going to a school for sciences. We know they collaborate well together since they devised Choice, and that Shouichi is a simp for his charisma. We know Shouichi trusted and believed in Byakuran enough to join his mafia family and take on ranks and titles under him. We know Byakuran believed in Shouichi enough to give him it all, and even after their time at college, they both wanted to be invested in each other's lives forever (the mafia is not something you walk away from). We know Byakuran legitimately thinks the world of Shouichi, his best friend, even if he would sacrifice him for his ambitions. We know Shouichi legitimately thinks the world of Byakuran, his best friend, even if he would betray him.

While Byakuran is effortlessly endearing and boisterous, Shouichi is quieter and enigmatic. They are the Extrovert who adopted the Introvert trope except Shouichi is no wallflower. Shouichi is courageous, cunning, and manipulative while Byakuran can be playful, caring, and genuine--as well as the reverse. Neither is, necessarily, a better person than the other at their core, and their actions are equally as grey when we don't know what it is that Byakuran wanted to give the world that everyone was trying so hard to stop. Would World Peace have been worth a handful of deaths? The ambiguity leaves a lot to question if you don't fall into the "any sacrifice is too high a cost" set of values.

Strong headcanon, but I believe Byakuran wanted a world that he could be a part of. He is obviously not human, even without the Mare ring he was able to see across alternative dimensions, and he seems to be completely detached from consequences. If you've seen an infinite number of Shouichi's, is there such a thing as the 'real' Shouichi? If you've seen kingdoms rise and fall based on a butterfly's wings, is there any permanence in institutions? If people love you in one world and are indifferent to you in another, which is the truth of their feelings? If all things are possible, then nothing is concretely true, real, or genuine. You are a player character surrounded by NPCs and worlds you can load up as you like where you can simply move on if you get tired of the scenario. Byakuran was already a god, but he was a god railroaded into living a life of limited possibility despite infinite options. I think he wanted one timeline, one truth, one world in which things were perfect and he knew he was with the Shouichi, and he was the Byakuran who got to live his life. This makes the most sense of why they had to stop Byakuran in that future specifically--because all other parallel worlds would cease to exist if the Byakuran of their future specifically won. And if the toll of his victory is an infinite number of casualties, then the stakes are so high that it makes sense why the burden of it crushes Shouichi and physically pains him at every step but also why he still cares deeply for his best friend despite it all. Because he can't offer an alternative solution; there is no cure for the level of insight Byakuran has gained and the level of detachment it has caused him over the decade. Even telling him that no matter how many Shouichi's exist, he is himself and unique and special to Byakuran is hollow because surely every version of himself would wish to think so too. He knows how happy Byakuran would be to live in a "real" world with "real" people and there is no way to give it to him--in fact, he knows he is what caused Byakuran to begin to lose his connection with reality in the first place.

Both of them will lie, cheat, steal, and murder to get what they want. And I think Byakuran is constantly amused when he is reminded of how calculating and cold Shouichi can be. Shouichi, on the other hand, is exasperated by Byakuran's childishness, but uncomfortably attracted to the sheer force of his personality. They are a switch couple. Shouichi hates it when Byakuran starts to treat him like his sweet, docile bottom and will turn the tables on him to prove he is and has always been a perfect match for Byakuran's cunning. And Byakuran doesn't care if he's baby girl or daddy so long as he has a good time. Friends, to lovers, to enemies, to… friends? Their relationship is tangled in the memories of people they will never become. And that makes them even more fascinating.

[talkingpointsusa]

In an unhinged episode of his show, Charlie Kirk calls Tim Walz a "Marxist" and tells his audience to withhold their kids college tuition unless they vote for Trump.

Right-wing media has really been struggling to figure out their stance on Kamala Harris' new VP pick Tim Walz and who can blame them at this point? Their sides pick for VP, J.D. "Childless cat ladies" Vance, hasn't exactly been working out all that well and the public opinion seems to be leaning rather left as of late.

That being said, Charlie Kirk in particular seemed to struggle with how to handle Tim Walz. I'll offer up a bit of my thoughts on why towards the end but lets hear what Charlie has to say. Spoiler alert: it's Obama's birth certificate levels of nonsense.

08:06, Charlie Kirk: "There's a lot of backstory here about how Kamala Harris came to her selection of Governor Walz. You see, Kamala Harris was going to chose Josh Shapiro. All of the Democrat machinery was heading towards Josh Shapiro, the betting odds had an 80% chance that Josh Shapiro's gonna be the nominee, he cancelled events in the Hamptons, he was telling his closest friends that he was going to be the vice-president selection, it looked as if that no one could disagree."

You can see what's going on here. If Charlie had some actual information that he could use to smear Tim Walz with he absolutely would have ran with it at the beginning of the show. Unfortunately, Charlie seems to have settled on "this pick was unexpected, must have been some kind of shadowy conspiracy!".

Tim Walz was pretty much instantly embraced by progressive voters and Democrats alike. There is a very united positive view of Walz and there isn't really much dirt on the guy, unlike J.D. Vance who has been a flaming disaster of a pick for the Trump Administration. So instead of explaining why this pick is bad news or why we should be concerned about governor Walz it's just "he's a commie, they snubbed Shapiro because they're antisemites!".

09:20, Charlie Kirk: "There was an advertisement that was dropped by 'mistake' (his air quotes, not mine) by the Philadelphia mayor where they announced the Josh Shapiro decision pre-emptively because everything was almost a signed, sealed, and delivered deal. Now, mind you the media has done almost no coverage of this because they are carrying the water of Kamala Harris, they don't want to try to do the inside story of how Kamala Harris didn't want to have a Jewish person on her ticket."

As we've seen in the past, a lot of the more mainstream right-wing media like Charlie Kirk expect nothing but unflinching praise of Israel lest you get labelled an antisemite. A lot of the more fringe stuff like Candace Owens goes in the opposite direction and cloaks their antisemitism in faux-criticism of Israel that really acts more like a Trojan Horse to try and trick disaffected progressives that support Palestinian rights into thinking that we're on the same side. I am a supporter of Palestinian rights and I also reject antisemites like Candace Owens, Stew Peters, and Nick Fuentes. They are all far-right assholes who deserve to be called out at any available opportunity.

No, Kamala Harris didn't drop Josh Shapiro because he was Jewish and pretty much everybody who resides in reality agrees with that. The right has been trying to lay that line of attack before the nomination was even announced. In an interview, J.D. Vance stated that if the Democrats didn't pick Josh Shapiro it would be out of antisemitism in their own caucus. This has became a well established talking point and needs to be called out as BS.

As a matter of fact, Tim Walz has already received support from Pro-Israel groups and politicians and Walz has expressed support for Israel multiple times in the past. If they snubbed Shapiro for his support of Israel, why tap Walz? Walz has mellowed out a bit in recent years and is expressing a bit more sympathy towards the Pro-Palestinian cause, something which we as progressives should encourage, however he's still way more Pro-Israel than people like Charlie Kirk would have you believe. I also don't think that this is a place that Charlie wants to go since out of the 36 Jewish people in Congress, 34 are members of the Democratic Party.

If Charlie Kirk is so concerned about antisemitism you'd think he'd have something to say about Donald Trump's recent interview with Sid Rosenburg where he agreed with the host when he said that Doug Emhoff is "a crappy jew" and attacked Jewish voters who are planning to vote for Kamala Harris. How about Donald Trump's recent interview with antisemitic streamer and Nick Fuentes associate Adin Ross? You would think that Charlie Kirk, a guy who's absolutely not an antisemite as long as you ignore all those comments about Jewish people pushing "Anti-white hatred" and "Jewish dollars funding cultural Marxism" that he makes on his show, would have something to say about that antisemitism since he's oh so concerned about the Democratic Party. It's almost as if Charlie Kirk doesn't really care about antisemitism.

As for this story about the ad in Philly, it's a big load of nothing. This is about a video posted on Twitter by Philadelphia mayor Cherelle Parker that endorsed Josh Shapiro for VP that some people interpreted as an accidental reveal of Harris' running mate. It was just a video that was supposed to endorse Shapiro if he was tapped for VP. I'm sure that most politicians do this so that if a person from their city or state who's a contender for president or vice president gets the nomination they can show their support online.

This isn't proof that the Democrats enacted a shadowy plan to oust Shapiro and that the script was set beforehand, it's just an endorsement video that was made so that if Shapiro did get tapped the Mayor of Philadelphia would have something to post after the fact. It's not that deep.

09:59, Charlie Kirk: "It became as if a very certain fact that Josh Shapiro's gonna be the VP and the Democrat base lost their mind. The Democrat base took to Twitter, they took to social networks, and said 'we are not gonna put up with a Jewish American who is Pro-Israel to be on the ticket'. The Jew hatred and the Antisemitism in the Democrat Party unleashed like a volcano."

Yes, one of the criticisms that progressives have of Shapiro is that he is extremely Pro-Israel but criticism of the government of Israel's war crimes in Gaza is not antisemitic just like how criticizing the Vatican for covering up sexual abuse in the church isn't bigoted towards Catholics. It's simply holding a government/organization accountable for its actions.

Shapiro has other baggage though. For example, the National Woman's Defense League issued a statement before the nomination urging Harris to drop Shapiro as a contender. This is because of the way he handled a sexual harassment complaint against one of his aides Michael A Vereb. The state agreed to pay $295,000 last September to settle the complaint but the damage was already done. Tim Walz also has more experience as a governor.

But again, this shows that Tim Walz doesn't really have much for these losers to run with. This is just weak dumb attacks on the fact that he was nominated in the first place with no talk about where Walz stands on the issues. If you were someone who watches Charlie Kirk the only takeaway you'd have is "Well, nominating him was antisemitic and also MARXISM!".

11:25, Charlie Kirk: "Obama always liked Walz because Walz is a party loyalist. Walz is someone that will do the bidding of whatever the party tells him."

Charlie Kirk blames everything on Obama. Tim Walz is the nominee? OBAMA! Joe Biden decided not to run for re-election? OBAMA! The coffee shop burnt his breakfast bagel? OBAMA!

12:08, Charlie Kirk: "Now, there are some negatives with Shapiro. Shapiro would have caused the DNC to be bedlam because the Democrat Party can't stand Jews."

That's why the Democrats constantly pal around with Nazi's like Nick Fuentes while the Republicans have 34 Jewish members of Congress....oh wait, it's the other way around. My mistake, Charlie is just full of shit again.

12:26, Charlie Kirk: "More than anything else, reporting shows that Kamala Harris did not trust Josh Shapiro because he was too ambitious. He wanted it too much and she went with the safe pick."

Alright so Tim Walz was the safe pick, got it. Here's Charlie literally two seconds later creating just a *slight* contradiction to what he just said in the quote above.

12:39, Charlie Kirk: "Now on paper you would think that a midwestern governor like Tim Walz, he's like a folksy midwesterner. Loyal party guy, served as a member of Congress, a former teacher, governor of Minnesota, he's the safe pick. He's the safe pick if you want to now be described as the most liberal ticket in American history."

Woah! Wait....wasn't Tim Walz the safe pick just a couple seconds ago? So, let me get this straight because this is starting to get a bit confusing; Tim Walz is a loyal Democrat who will do whatever Obama tells him but he's also a secret communist and he's the safe pick but he also isn't. Gotcha, now that my necks been broken from the whiplash I have a directional understanding of Charlie's position.

13:28, Charlie Kirk: "This idea of Democrat base leakage, I think they blinked far too much and they said 'Well, Walz is gonna be able to consolidate the ticket because he's a party loyalist. He's a Soviet'. It's effectively like choosing Bernie Sanders and that's not an exaggeration."

Ah yes, famed mainstream Democratic Party loyalist Bernie Sanders.

The funny thing that I've been noticing about right-wing media's coverage of Tim Walz is that their criticisms keep making me like this guy more and more.

So blah, blah, blah, Tim Walz is loyal to the party but is also a Soviet and a communist, this makes a lot of sense to Charlie and literally only Charlie. Charlie cuts to the ad break and comes back with this absolutely galaxy brained take.

25:15, Charlie Kirk: "So, Tim Walz is the vice-presidential selection for Kamala Harris. I want you to think back to your high school days, I want you to think of the most liberal, obnoxious, social studies teacher. The one that would tell you things that have no applicability to reality, someone who's never had to run a business or had to shower before work or after work, someone that lives in the clouds and constant abstractions, someone that would always tell you that communism hasn't been totally tried and socialism is just about being a neighbor to one another, that is Tim Walz."

"Someone who is paid by oil billionaires to lie into a microphone all day and say dumb crap that doesn't really make any sense."

Seriously, by Charlie's own metric he's a complete failure who should never be taken seriously by anybody ever. Just switch "socialism" with "failed right-wing ideas" and that's Charlie to a T! He's never done hard blue-collar work and literally lives on a multi-million dollar country club in Arizona! Charlie Kirk looks like someone who'd be afraid of changing a tire because he might break a nail!

26:28, Charlie Kirk: "So, who is Tim Walz? Well, it's time we make sure America knows who you are. Tim Walz helped ignite the George Floyd riots, the worst the country had seen in decades."

Charlie Kirk, huge supporter of January 6th, is now mad at riots that weren't really riots. In terms of crime, it's been down in every major category in Minneapolis since 2023. Oopsie.

27:37, Charlie Kirk: "Tim Walz has the most radical abortion laws in the country. Zero limits. Did you know every year five or six babies are born alive and then murdered legally under the laws that he supports?"

Absolutely zero citation for this claim outside of Charlie Kirks extremely vivid imagination. Killing a baby that was born alive after an abortion is legally homicide, for example an abortion doctor named Kermit Gosnell was found guilty in Pennsylvania for killing three babies that were born alive in his abortion clinic. Absolutely nobody is legalizing "post-birth abortion", late term abortions are extremely rare, and the publics opinion is widely pro-choice.

Charlie does another ad break, comes back, plays a long speech from J.D. Vance, and proceeds says the exact same things he said in the last segment. Really gotta drill those talking points into the heads of his audience without giving them a break to think about whether they make any sense or not.

41:11, Charlie Kirk: "So, Tim Walz also signed into law giving drivers licenses to illegals regardless of their immigration status. He will enshrine Biden's invasion, he will make it permanent."

Charlie then plays a clip of Tim Walz signing this bill followed by him receiving massive amounts of applause from the people around him. Hmmm...almost as if bills like this are actually pretty popular and Charlie is just a dick invoking the white nationalist great replacement theory because he doesn't have anything else to run with.

This bill makes sense. Undocumented immigrants are human beings too and many of them have jobs to travel to and kids to send to school meaning that many of them will be driving either way. It's clearly safer to have them driving with a license than without one. When New Mexico passed similar legislation the rate of uninsured drivers dropped by 24%. Charlie than plays another clip from J.D. Vance and then whinges about everyone calling J.D. Vance weird.

45:57, Charlie Kirk: "And just so we're clear, the weird one is that creepy person Tim Walz. Tim Walz gives you very creepy vibes. He's the one that mandated tampons to be in boys bathrooms at the age of ten, true story."

Spending this much time thinking about middle school bathrooms is weird Charlie.

So, this tampon thing is the right-wing medias big attack on Tim Walz and it's a truly bizarre one. As governor of Minnesota, Walz signed a bill that requires schools to stock menstrual products in all girls and boys bathrooms with no charge to students. I don't understand how these guys think that this is a bad thing. "Oh no, he's making life easier for kids going through a difficult and confusing time in their lives. The horror".

These are the people that are supposed to be all about helping children, the GOP cares about the children they tell you (mostly when they're trying to advocate making life harder for trans kids and LGBTQ people). Yet when it comes to things like this and Tim Walz' policy around school lunches they clutch their pearls in horror and shock. It's almost as if they don't really care about kids at all.

If you guys are wondering why there are pretty pronounced time skips in this post, outside of the extremely long ad breaks for the radio here's the stuff that I'm skipping. You truly don't understand the degree of how repetitive an episode of the Charlie Kirk Show is. People are not meant to listen to this for the full two to three hours.

46:36, Charlie Kirk: "The reason why Tim Walz was selected, he was not the first pick. He was the radical kind of I guess not (sic). Is because the Democrat Party hates Jews. Van Jones admits that Kamala picking Walz was her caving to some of the darker parts of the party, as appeasing the anti-Jewish bigots that have gotten marbled into the party, Van Jones knows and he's saying the quiet part out loud. If you are a Jew in America just remember this, Democrats hate you."

What is Van Jones supposed to be admitting here exactly? Van Jones is a pundit, he doesn't know what the inner workings of the Democratic Party look like and is just speculating. What he's saying is just as dumb and weird as what Charlie's saying. Again, it makes zero sense to say that the Democrats "hate Jewish people" if you look at the basic facts about the party.

Charlie does an ad and then comes back and plays that Van Jones clip. He then interviews a guy named John Gay and it's pretty boring and uninformative. We have one last quote, here's Charlie after the interview telling families in his audience to extort their kids into voting for Trump.

01:26:24, Charlie Kirk: "If you do not get 100% turnout from your own house you're doing it wrong. Let me be very clear, guys. If you do not get one hundred percent turnout from your own house, you're doing it wrong. If you are a parent that has 18 or 19-year-old kids, you gotta get them out to vote. And by the way, if you are paying your 18, 19, or 20-year-old kid's tuition and they go vote for Kamala Harris, you should tell them you guys could pay for your own college. You're gonna go vote for Kamala Harris and our house here is working our tail off and we're going into debt to help you go through college, you guys can pay for your own college."

What an absolute POS. He's basically saying that parents should use financial abuse to force their children to vote the way that he wants them to. Charlie Kirk's a real cool guy, if this is the way he treats his own kids than I hope he has some nursing homes in mind for the future.

However, I also take a strange amount of comfort from this. Yeah, it's gross as hell and if anybody in his audience does this it would be extremely abusive behavior but it also shows how desperate Charlie is. He knows that the youth of America are extremely progressive and fed up with his parties BS, he knows that student debt relief plays well with younger voters, and he's scared. So while this is a totally disgusting thing to advocate for, you've also got to love how nervous this goon is.

Conclusion:

None of these guys know what to do with Tim Walz and it's so blatantly obvious when you watch shows like Charlie Kirk. It's just "The Democrats are antisemitic because they didn't pick Shapiro, Barack Hussein Obama, and Tim Walz is a Marxist".

Charlie Kirk is a guy who is only capable of communicating in talking points. He's really good at memorizing things and then repeating them so many times that they get bludgeoned in as gospel. That's why his show is so freaking repetitive, it's a feature not a bug. But even for Charlie the talking points were weak in this one. It's obvious that he was prepared to direct his BS at Shapiro and doesn't really know what to do with Walz. It'll certainly be interesting to see how these right-wing narratives evolve in the future but for now it's certainly fun to laugh at dumb dumbs squirming for content.

Cheers and I'll see you in the next one.

Original Video:

Charlie Kirk. “Kamala’s Commie Running Mate + the Iran Situation | Gay, Collin | 8.6.24.” Rumble, 6 Aug. 2024.

Sources:

Gardner, David. “J.D. Vance Says “Antisemitism” behind Tim Walz Pick as Harris Running Mate.” The Daily Beast, The Daily Beast, 6 Aug. 2024.

Olmsted, Edith. “Republicans Desperate to Blame “Antisemitism” for Kamala’s V.P. Pick.” The New Republic, 6 Aug. 2024.

Kilgore, Ed. “The Dumbest Attack on Walz Pick: Democrats Are Antisemites.” Intelligencer, Intelligencer, 6 Aug. 2024.

Alfonseca, Kiara. “Trump’s Comments on Jewish Democrats, Second Gentleman Doug Emhoff Spark Criticism.” ABC News, ABC News, Aug. 2024.

Klee, Miles. “This Streaming Superstar Met Andrew Tate -- and Started Platforming White Supremacists.” Rolling Stone, 2 Apr. 2023.

Tenbarge, Kat. “Adin Ross Interviews Trump, Gifts Him a Cybertruck and a Rolex.” NBC News, NBC News, 5 Aug. 2024.

“Speculation Runs Wild after Philadelphia Mayor Appears to Leak Harris’ Vice President Pick.” The Independent, 3 Aug. 2024.

LaFraniere, Sharon. “Shapiro Faces Scrutiny over Sexual Harassment Complaint against Aide.” The New York Times, 3 Aug. 2024.

Ingraham, Christopher. “Crime Fell in Every Major Category in 2023, according to Early Data • Minnesota Reformer.” Minnesota Reformer, 18 Jan. 2024.

“Driver’s Licenses for All.” ACLU of Minnesota, 24 Oct. 2023.

[arcadiasfiction]

Chat Text: Part One

After fighting yet another akuma, Cat Noir swung into his bedroom through the open window. Feeling a bit tired, he took a moment to stretch in his black leather cat suit. As he did, his green feline eyes caught sight of his phone which was resting on the edge of his desk.

"I forgot to text Marinette back!" he said, slapping a hand to his forehead. "She's probably really worried. Let me send her a quick text first, then I'll de-transform."

---

“Come back here, you little monsters!”

"Noooo! Ladybug, save us!"

The twin girls laughed as they ran around Alya's legs, trying to escape.

"I will akumatize you!" Alya said dramatically, holding up her hands and clawing her fingers like a T-Rex. At that moment, her phone began to ring. It was Marinette. Alya answered.

"Hey girl, what's up?"

"Alya! Something's wrong with Adrien!"

Alya eyes widened with concern.

"What do you mean? Is he sick?"

"Maybe! I don't know! Let me send you screenshots of his texts, and you tell me."

After a few moments, Alya received the screenshots. The start of the conversation was pretty normal. Marinette and Adrien were working on a school project together, and Marinette was asking what part of it he would like to take on.

Marinette: You ok with doing the report?

Adrien: I'll do whatever you want me to.

Marinette: No. I want you to do whatever you like.

Adrien: Whatever I like?

Marinette: Yeah.

Adrien: Then I'd like to have you here with me.

Adrien: and I'd like to hold your hand

Adrien: and share with you my room-side view of Paris while telling you how much I love you.

Marinette: I was asking what you want to do for the project!

Adrien: I'll research whatever you want me to. Are you happy being with me?

Marinette: Of course!

Adrien: Then I'll be happy to do whatever, however you want.

Adrien: Tell me how you want me to kiss you, and I'll do it.

Marinette: But we've only held hands so far, so idk.

Adrien: I can do something about that, if you want. What would you like, Mari?

Alya tried to swipe for more, but the screenshots stopped there. Something about their dynamic felt familiar, but she just couldn't put her finger on it. Alya fanned her face for a moment before asking Marinette, "So how did you reply to that?"

Coughing came from the other end of the line.

"I uh…blacked out. I don't remember."

Sure, she did. Alya narrowed her eyes, doubtful.

"But you guys have been dating for like over a month now…"

"No, Alya! You don't understand. He never texts like this. Here's a conversation we had yesterday. This is how it normally is."

Alya's phone pinged with another set of screenshots.

Adrien: Hey, Marinette!

Marinette: Hey Adrien!

Adrien: I was just thinking about you.

Marinette: That's nice. Me too!

Adrien: How's it going with designing the menu for your parents' bakery?

Marinette: It's going great. I can't wait to show you the redesign!

Adrien: Can't wait to see it. I love how talented you are Marinette. It's impressive.

Marinette: Thanks!

Adrien: Want to go grab some ice cream?

Marinette: Of course! Let me ask my parents.

Adrien: I can't wait to see you!

Marinette: Same!

Alya frowned. The second conversation did sound much more like him.

"Maybe his cousin Felix stole his phone and is playing tricks on you."

"I hope not! I need to check with Adrien tomorrow to see what this is about."

"Did you ask him while you guys were texting?"

"I did and well… I'll just send you the shot."

Another screenshot arrived.

Marinette: Let's focus on the project!!! Adrien! You ok today?

Adrien: I'm fine. But you seem a bit tense. You ok?

Marinette: I'm alright.

Adrien: Want to watch a movie with me tonight? It'll help you relax.

Marinette: No. We have homework and this project!

Adrien: You're wearing that annoyed pout right now, aren't you?

Marinette: No.

Adrien: That's too bad. I love your pout. I also love when you wear your hair down, but then you're just beautiful all the time, Mari. I want to see you.

Alya cleared her throat.

"Either someone stole his phone or he's totally delusional."

"Yes! And I didn't ask anymore because I was scared."

"Scared you would black out again?"

"Uh--something like that. I'll just have to wait until school tomorrow. I'm sure he'll have an explanation."

---

Adrien, now de-transformed and back in his typical casual shirt and jeans, sat at his desk with his phone in his hands, stunned.

True, he was in a hurry to get back to her. But in hindsight, Adrien realized that sending text messages to Marinette while he was still Cat Noir was not the best idea. Anxiety washed over him as reread his text conversation with her. He ran a hand through his blond hair.

"Plagg, this is a disaster!"

"Disaster is my middle name," said Plagg while chomping on a cheese wedge.

"I was only going to send one text. I don't know what came over me!"

"That Marinette is your main cheese, so it's only natural for your feelings to overflow. It's like coming across a tasty piece of Camembert. It is poetry."

Adrien massaged his face with his hands. "I know we're dating now, but this is just too much. Ladybug didn't like when I was like this, and I'm sure Marinette would find it weird too. I'll try to smooth things over tomorrow."

"From the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks."

"Plagg, don't rub it in!"

---

How is Adrien going to fix his texting faux pas? See in Part Two!

[alastors-airwaves]

Hey Alastor, I looked up sciatic and read that one way to ease the symptoms is through gentle massage. Maybe see if Husk would like that? I mean, you are 'mates' in a sense so you should probably be trying to help him, right?

I know empathy isn't your strong suit, but just try to imagine if you were the one experiencing the pain he's in right now. Even if you can't empathize, you can show a little consideration.

Alastor quietly approaches Husk, carrying a small bag of supplies. His expression is calm, but there's a hint of concern as he looks over the exhausted, uncomfortable form of his friend. Husk is slumped on the couch, one hand rubbing at his lower back in frustration. His tail twitches irritably as he tries to shift into a better position.

Alastor: *softly* Husker, I couldn’t help but notice you’ve been struggling with some pain.

Husk: *opening his eyes and blinking wearily* Yeah… sciatica’s been killing me. What do you want?

Alastor: *sitting beside him and placing the bag down* I brought a few things to help ease that discomfort. I know how unbearable pregnancy pains can be, especially at this stage.

Husk: *raises an eyebrow* You do, huh?

Alastor: *smirking* I’m 20 weeks along myself, remember? But in your case, I figured a massage might help. I’ve picked up a few tricks to ease tension. Would you let me try?

Husk: *hesitant but curious* ...A massage, huh? I dunno, Al. I ain’t really the touchy-feely type.

Alastor: *gently rolling up his sleeves* Just relax. You’ll thank me later.

Husk huffs but doesn’t protest further as Alastor moves behind him, carefully placing his hands on Husk’s shoulders. Husk tenses for a moment, but as Alastor’s fingers press firmly into the muscles of his back, Husk can’t deny the immediate relief he feels.

Alastor: *kneading the tension out of Husk’s back* You’ve been carrying yourself all wrong, Husker. These muscles are tight as can be. No wonder your sciatica’s acting up.

Husk: *groaning in relief* Ohhh... yeah, that... that feels way better than I expected.

Alastor: *chuckling softly* Told you. Just let me work my magic, and you’ll feel like a new cat.

Husk leans forward slightly, allowing Alastor better access to his lower back. Alastor’s hands move with surprising skill, finding every knot and tight muscle, his touch precise and careful. Husk lets out a long, deep breath as the pain in his lower back begins to fade.

Husk: *muttering* Didn’t think you’d be good at this…

Alastor: *grinning* There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Husker. Just keep breathing and let me take care of you.

As the massage continues, Husk’s tail begins to sway lazily, a clear sign that he’s enjoying the relief. Alastor focuses on Husk’s hips and lower back, gently easing the pressure on the sciatic nerve. The room falls into a comfortable silence, broken only by Husk’s occasional sighs of relief.

Alastor: *after a while* Feeling better?

Husk: *half-asleep, mumbling* Yeah... yeah, I’m good... thanks, Al. You’re a lifesaver.

Alastor: *smiling softly* Anything for my mate

Alastor finishes the massage, giving Husk a pat on the shoulder before sitting back, pleased with his work. Husk leans back against the bed, a far more relaxed and comfortable expression on his face. For the first time in days, he feels like he can finally rest without pain.

[quizzievivicalavellan]

Simple Pleasures

In which Gale is musing about sitting by the fire with Tara, and Aster Wild Shape's into a cat.

***************************************************

Sitting by the soft glow of the fire outside Last Light Inn, listening to the hum of familiar voices drifting through the doors of the tavern, Gale could almost forget the shadow curse that ravaged the lands beyond this small safe haven, the terrible journey that lay ahead, and what he must do at the end of that journey...

The end ...

Well, I did say ‘almost’ he thought, feeling those dark thoughts forcing their way back into the front of his mind. He took a deep breath, refocusing on the calming warmth of the fire.

It reminded him of long nights spent reading by the fireplace in his tower back in Waterdeep, Tara purring loudly curled up right beside the flames. Ah, simpler times…

Laughter poured out of the tavern, everyone amused by some joke he had missed. He turned back to the fire with a small smile that spoke of a hidden sadness. After so long spent alone in his tower, Gale found it even more difficult than before to be in a crowd. He was used to his own company and preferred it to the confusing mess of tens of people having tens of different conversations all around him, but in truth he would rather not be entirely alone tonight.

Aster was far more social than he, however, and he would never attempt to pry her away from the evening’s revelries. Aster had at last recovered from her injuries sustained while searching for Thaniel, and tonight their little troupe and the Harpers and tieflings at Last Light were having a last night of fun before they once again set out into the Shadow-Cursed Lands.

“I thought I might find you here.”

Gale turned to see Aster standing behind him, as if she had read his mind. While technically a possibility given their shared tadpole affliction, she hardly needed telepathy to pull off this particular trick of timing. It would be easier to count the times he wasn’t thinking of her.

“You don’t need to come out here on my account. Go, have fun. I am perfectly content to enjoy a quiet evening in my own company,” he replied, hoping he was able to mask his desire for her to stay with nonchalance.

 “And what if I want to enjoy a quiet evening in your company?” She sat down next to him beside the fire, giving him a sultry look and placing a hand on his thigh.

Gale swallowed hard, feeling a heat that was more than the warmth of the fire. “Then I am happy to oblige. I would never refuse your company.”

“Good,” she replied softly, leaning against him and gently shifting her hand higher up his leg, sending Gale’s temperature climbing along with it.

“You seem tense, is there something on your mind?” Aster asked him, a concerned look on her face.

“Well, I…” Gale paused, thinking of how to deflect from what was truly on his mind, this being neither the time nor the place, “sitting out here reminds me of the fireplace at my tower, where I’d often sit with Tara. I never understood how she wasn’t absolutely roasting, sitting so close. Sometimes I worried she would catch her feathers on fire.”

Aster laughed at the image. “It feels different for a cat, sorry, a tressym. Heat against fur; it is a sensation of comfort like no other.” Gale supposed that, as a druid, Aster was as much of an expert in that subject as any non-feline could be.

“Alas, such simple pleasures remain outside my expansive pool of knowledge,” he replied with a dramatic sweeping gesture of the hand. Aster rolled her eyes in jest, her lips curled upward in an amused smile.

“Maybe it isn’t” Aster mused, her expression turning thoughtful, “Maybe I could show you.”

“What are you proposing?”

“The tadpoles, they let us share thoughts and experiences, right? So, if I took the shape of a cat, and we used the tadpole connection, then you could experience what it’s like to feel the warmth of a fire on your fur,” she gushed, clearly excited by the idea.

It was an intriguing notion. Gale had been curious what it felt like to be such an array of creatures as Aster could transform into since he first witnessed her Wild Shape.

“A clever idea. I always welcome the opportunity to learn something new; this time you can be the teacher and I your humble student,” Gale replied, referencing that first lesson in the Weave. 

In an instant, the beautiful red-headed gnome sitting beside him was gone, and in her place stood a tawny cat with long, thick fur and gleaming gold eyes. Aster-the-cat leapt into his lap, circling twice before settling down with her back toward the fire.

Gale reached out with the tadpole and felt Aster reaching back. Her mind felt familiar, yet subtly changed. The sensations of the senses were heightened; through her ears he could hear the creaking of tree branches, the far-off chirping of crickets, even the rhythmic beating of his own heart. Her thoughts came to him more as images and feelings than as words. And, of course, he felt through the connection the sensation of the fire’s warmth against her fur. He concentrated on that feeling, amplifying the connection until their experience was one. He felt the heat radiating across her fur as if it were his own, and the sensation was every bit as comforting as Aster had described. Gale let out a soft, pleasurable sigh, basking in the shared feeling.

After a long moment sitting quietly by the fire, Aster-the-cat shifted in his lap, nuzzling her face against his chest. She started to purr, the soft, steady rumbling breaking the silence.

On instinct, Gale brought his hand over to scratch between her ears. Her purrs grew louder as he stroked his hand across her back. There was something strangely intimate about the gesture that would likely have made Gale blush if he thought about it any harder, but at the moment the only thing he was thinking about was Tara.

Tara. His best and, until very recently, only friend. He hoped, wherever she was, that she was safe and not overly worried about him, though knowing Tara, the latter was about as likely as Lae’zel developing a sense of humor. He smiled at the thought, but nascent tears began pricking at his eyes.

He looked down to see Aster-the-cat’s giant golden eyes staring back at him with as much concern as her feline face could express. Tara had looked at him like that whenever the hunger of the orb grew painful again. That look sent the welling tears in his eyes spilling out over his cheeks.

He could sense that Aster was about to transform back when they heard footsteps approaching from close behind them. Gale rapidly wiped the tears away, hoping the darkness outside would obscure any remnants of the crying spell. He turned around to see Karlach and Astarion approaching the fire, wine goblets in hand.

“Aw, Gale, you’re missing the party!” Karlach whined, wobbling slightly from what had clearly been too much wine.

“Please, I’d hardly call that a party,” Astarion chimed in. “I’ve tasted rats better than this wine, and everyone still has all of their clothes on.”

Karlach laughed heartily in reply. Her laughter was infectious, and Gale found himself chuckling along despite himself.

Suddenly, Karlach’s laughter came to an abrupt halt as something caught her attention. “Oh. My. Gods. That cat is just adorable!!!” Karlach passed her goblet to Astarion and squatted down next to Gale to get a closer look at the feline sitting in his lap.

Aster-the-cat reached out a paw toward Karlach, who instinctually flinched away from the potential contact. Gale could practically see the moment that she remembered the fact that her latest upgrade to her mechanical heart had dampened her inner fire to the point that she was no longer a burn risk to those around her. Her face lit up like the sun and her clenched hands shook with excitement.

“I can actually pet it! For the first time in ten years, I can pet a cat. This is officially the best day ever!” Karlach exclaimed, reaching out her hand enthusiastically to pet Aster-the-cat. As she ran her fingers through the purring cat’s fur, Karlach appeared to practically melt with happiness.

“Who’s a pretty kitty? Where did you come from, hmm?” Karlach said in a sing-song voice, gently scratching Aster-the-cat under her chin.

“Oh, I think I have an idea…” Astarion said, looking pointedly at Gale. “Not just any ordinary cat, is she?” He smiled salaciously, his pointed fangs on full display. “Enjoy making her purr, Gale?”

Gale’s face instantly flushed with embarrassment, and he sputtered in protest, unable to form his rebuke into words. Karlach looked between the two with confusion for a moment before understanding dawned on her features and she put a hand up to her mouth to unsuccessfully stifle a snorting laugh.

“Nice one, Astarion,” Karlach said through laughter as she stood, “I’ll leave you two be then, didn’t realize I was interrupting.”

Astarion crouched down, waggling his finger before gently tapping it against Aster-the-cat’s nose.

“And here I thought Gale would never get any pus– OW!” Astarion yelled, shaking the hand that Aster-the-cat had just scratched.

“What was that for?” Astarion whined, licking droplets of blood off of his hand.

“Aw, come on, you had that one coming,” Karlach laughed as Aster-the-cat turned around and flicked her upturned tail dismissively.

“Fine, I suppose I deserved that, but that scratch better not leave a scar!”

“Come on, I’ll get Shadowheart to fix you up, you poor delicate vampire,” Karlach replied, guiding Astarion back toward the inn by the elbow.

“It takes a lot of effort to look this good, you know,” Astarion’s voice drifted back as the pair walked away. Once they were gone, Aster transformed back into a gnome again.

“He’s just teasing, ignore him,” she said, taking Gale’s hand in her own and brushing her thumb across his knuckles.

“Believe me, I try to,” Gale replied with an exasperated huff of a laugh.

She glanced up at him, the look in her bright green eyes shifting to concern, “I meant to ask you before, are you alright? You looked… sad.”

“I’m alright. I just… miss Tara more than I realized.”

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you,” Aster said softly, her gaze shifting to the ground.

“No, you didn’t!” Gale responded reassuringly. “It was nice to think about a simpler time for moment. And you were right about the warmth of a fire against fur; what a sensation! It was a fascinating experience, joining minds with a cat. Well, a druid who was currently a cat, at any rate. It does make me wonder, given Halsin’s propensity towards an ursine form, what does it feel like to be a bear?”

Aster chuckled at that “Careful, you would look awfully tasty to a bear.”

“Oh, those bears ought to think twice. I can assure you, I taste terrible.”

Aster smirked suggestively. “Someday, I look forward to finding out whether that’s true.”

Before he could process what she just said, she stood up and gave him a kiss on the cheek. “Goodnight, Gale,” she said as she walked away, leaving Gale sitting there by the fire, burning on the inside.

[kit-williams]

Barn Anon. I think I’ll be freed soon. There’s an itch I want to scratch on my head without getting dye on my fingers.

You’re not sure how you’ve gotten yourself in his situation. You’re now sure that that’s a Chaos Marine that you have currently sprawled on your floor right under your ceiling fan. You had seen him a few weeks ago on an late night walk. It had started to rain and you felt sorry seeing him getting drenched as he stands leaning against a wall.

You thought you were doing a good thing when you handed your umbrella to him. Your home wasn’t far and it was adorable how small it seems when he held it. You were ready to write your umbrella as gone for ever so it was a surprise to open your door to find it hanging on the handle. He had followed you?

That wasn’t too bad right? You’ve seen the videos and pictures online. Space Marines are friendly, kind, gentle. Then gifts started turning up. At first it was things like pretty looking rocks. Your neighbour joked that he was like a cat bringing home gifts.

You start seeing him around the neighbourhood more. You gain the courage to one day go up to him and he spoke, though you understood none of it. He pats you on the head before letting you leave. Huh. But you carry on and start hanging out with him time to time.

Then one day as you were on your way home, you had gotten mugged. You were crying when you reached home and your “Space Marine” was there. He disappeared as soon as he was sure you weren’t hurt.

The next day on the news there would be a report of a body found dismembered and scattered in field. Your “Space Marine” was in your house, he lets out a pleased rumble when he saw the news. Ruffling your hair as he does. He seems pleased? Delighted? What?

When he leaves as he usually does, you start looking up space marines once more. You see it now… they’re different… from yours. You thought it was purely a cosmetic difference but you go down a rabbit hole and learn about these Chaos Marines. That there’s Chaos and Loyalists.

Your heart races as you look into it more. The gifts he has been leaving you, recently have gotten more questionable . With some being items like rings and other expensive items. You never thought to ask where he has gotten them, never felt reason to be concerned until now..

You look over the top of your laptop as you see him just laying on the floor watching the ceiling fan. You are diving down the rabbit hole of Chaos Space Marines and swallowing as they tend to not be the friendly, kind, and gentle marines that the Loyalists that everyone posts about. You learn about the maulings... the indifference... the high likelihood that they'll just up and leave... the paranormal and occult like activities... and... oh you blush and feel flustered at some of the things that they get up to. You jump as a clawed hand just slowly closes your laptop for you.

Your marine just grins at you as he pulls you into his lap just cooing at you as you try to be brave.

"I... I like your gifts..." You say and he stops his petting just cooing down at you putting a hand under your chin for a moment before continuing to pet you, "Just ummm where have you been getting them?" He pauses before you hear that rasping laugh of his as his hands cup your cheeks.

You jerk back on instinct but you have to let him squish your cheeks as you whimper slightly. That slightly manic grin as he coos down at you seeming to enjoy the way you squirm at his actions.

"I'm sorry I asked I wont ask anymore." You finally relent as that seems to be the trick as he lets go but pulls you close to nuzzle you making inhuman noises as if praising you again.

It seems he's decided he's staying the night as he goes into your kitchen and sets out items for you to cook... you don't remember buying the meat that he sets out but you just nervously smile at him as you relent, "Well I guess we can have that tonight. I get to have some right?"

He frowns at you and huffs as if that was a stupid thing to ask but he returns to cooing at you and petting your head. You suddenly notice the rings on your fingers and forcibly ignore the blood on one of them.

He's... he's a good boy and not a scary stray you just let into your home... no let into your life. By just giving him a simple umbrella.

[evilminji]

Back at it again? With more BNHA? My goodness!

See, in one my WIP, which haunts me like a cursed Victorian doll in the night, chanting to me my sins from beneath the floorboards, I got a few OCs. As ya do. Gotta flesh out that world building. And I am ALWAYS a ho for some sweet, sweet SI-OC action!

Because the stranger in a strange land, can see what SHOULD be mundane and familiar anew! There are Moral Quandries! You get to put your sticky lil gremlin fingers ALL over the set dressing and look inside those boxes they put in the background of the scenes! What's IN there? Secrets? We bet it's SECRETS.

Tis the BEST, really. I enjoy it.

But of course! If it's BNHA then we must assign Randomly Gifted Genetic Fuckry(tm) : The Super Powers Edition. Where in? My love of "immediately obvious powers are for cowards. There are no such things as weak powers, only weak and uncreative minds" comes into plaaaay~

I! Want! WEIRD QUIRKS!

Supposedly "minor" ones! That everyone says "oh that's a minor power. Sucks for you" and expects you to just leave it at that! Give up. Like you're some sort of fuckin CASUAL.

HA!

Nah, we pushing this fucker until REALITY breaks. You are gonna be legitimately asking "how the FUCK did you do that!?" And the answer is Will Power, Spite, and "Cause Fuck You, I'm Awesome".

Which of course, is how we got Kimiko. The most high femme, kawaii, little pastel pink bundle of Rage and Bloodlust the Heroics world has ever seen. She is that stage of little girl where they like to wear tiaras, princess dresses, and want to MURDER EVERYTHING. But never grew out of it.

She grew IN to it.

Got a lot of rage, that one. Probably because everyone is all "ooooh, kimi! Your Quirk is so CUTE! You'll be such a good housewife! Such a good sweets maker! Aren't you so CUTE! Let's all infantalize Kimi!" *murder intensifies*

She can turn part of what she is touching into Marshmallow.

*slaps a hand on your shoulder* There are NO restrictions on that~☆! ANYTHING she touchs. Is she touch you? Air? The ground? This building we are standing in? Wanna keep talkin shit? How do you feel about Marshmallow lungs? Enough training and eventually she can take out a building!

Cause Marshmallow? Not a very strong support. Ground under your high rise better be sturdy if you want it to hold, you know? Things to think about. Other things, are the "part of" aspect. Which she is slowly getting better at. Wanna see a trick? *a Marshmallow plops down on the table on the far side of the room* Still air! Still touching~.

Hope your technology is AIR TIGHT and not IN the air. Or moving through it at any concerning speeds. Like, say, a car. Fun thought! Don't fuck with her again! Kimi out! *removes threatening hand of possible Marshmallow Murder*

She's besties with the SI. Himiko. They are the Koko's and WILL be going to UA specifficaly because Kimi was told she couldn't make it. Himi wants nothing to do with this bullshit but is being dragged along like a cat in a harness.

She has my favorite super power. Egg.

Just... Egg.

Egg? Yes. She can summon eggs. Into the spoon. Like those challenge races. Except there is no race, its just her in her pjs trying to eat her damn breakfast. But SUPRISE! Raw egg. Full on, chicken egg in a shell, in your spoon. Perfectly balanced.

And in this iteration, it does have to be in a "spoon" or spoon-like shape. Defined as a bowl with a handle. The egg will fit the spoon. And? Most importantly! Not restricted to chicken eggs!!!

Tiny spoon? Tiny egg. Large spoon? Large egg.

Theoretically? Stadium sized spoon? Stadium sized egg of unknown species never to be seen on planet earth. Because YES. Those thought popping into your head. "Ha ha, what about a dodo eg-" Yeah, see, not ass funny when you actually DO that as a sleep deprived toddler because you HAVE TO KNOW. And now conservationists are hunting you for sport.

Do you have? ANY idea the lengths certain folks would go too to save endangered bird or frog species? If it comes out of an egg. Yes. She CAN make it. No risk of inbreeding for the already critically small populations. Just viable, healthy eggs. Ready to be incubated.

Took her an afternoon.

Needless to say... things get Exciting(tm). People need to be threatened. Himi gets lifelong job security at age four. Neat.

But!!! Not why I started writing! I had a THIRD OC child! Who never made it to the limelight! Gasp! I know! The secret comes out! I scrapped him in favor of Kimi. But his power was one I enjoy Pondering about!

Unlock. You can unlock doors. All doors.

No, you can't "unlock" the bonds between atoms or something. It has to be a Door. But! Begs the question, don't it? Would you... would you have "door sensing"? If there was a perfectly blended in or painted over door? Would you be able to say "it's right there"?

What happens if you use your ability on a tree? Doors are often made of wood. Would there be any effect? Even if no "opening" happened? Could you open metaphorical doors? If someone PAINTED a door, could you open a wall? If so, how deep? If we painted a cliff face, could you open a door to the other side of the mountain?

How far does you door opening power stretch?!

I understand you Izuku! I too, want to study these cool Quirks! See how far they can develop! No more strength quirks! More minor quirks with unusual applications! Woooo!

@the-witchhunter @hdgnj @mutable-manifestation @hypewinter