#why. does she talk to me like yhis

[our-inspire-verse]

Oh haha! I must have been sleeping on a penny. Funny. I sleep on stuff without noticing a lot.

Mitten: you've been sleeping on top of 2 baby carrots for weeks.

Thats still under there? You didnt fix it?

Mitten: you didnt feel it. You are NOT a princess.

What?

Mitten: princess felt 1 pea under many mattresses. You didnt feel 2 carrots under 1 thin one. You are a terrible princess. Dirty nasty.

[uva124]

So yeah, I finished the drawing of Asha's redesign from Wish :D, maybe I'll make some changes in the future, but I'm happy to have finished it, it should be noted that I haven't seen the movie. , so I can't give my opinion on it yet, but I found it very interesting that their fandom is mainly made up of people who rewrote or made their own version of the movie, they are all very creative and it got me out of an artistic block. that I had a few months ago, but above all I found the rewriting of @annymation which is the one I have been most hooked on, so I wanted to do some redesigns of the characters coming out of its rewriting, that's why everything that has to do with the story of this version of Asha, as well as her personality and her world on which I base my drawing are the ideas and work of this account: @annymation

I'm just making a drawing of her character and how I would design her as well as sharing part of the process I had to do to draw her because, why not?

BOARD:

The first thing I had to do was put together a table full of references that reminded me of the character and things that I would like to add to her design, so I used milanote to do it:

-Looked for some Asha's concept art and save the ones I liked the most, and add the main colors that I used in the design. -I also created notes to write down the personality of the character and some of his data to have a better guide, I did a little research and found publications that talked a lot about Asha's discarded designs and how Disney workers had put that she had tribe ancestry Amazigh on his mother's side and since his father was from the Iberian Peninsula, that's why the next thing I wanted to do is research more about their culture. -I am not an expert on this topic, nor do I belong to the cultures from which Asha has ancestry, so you can comment on any correction regarding this topic, I wanted to implement details of this culture to her design and I would really like to give a correct representation :)

HAIRSTYLE

Continuing with the theme, I saw that the hairstyles in the Amazigh culture mostly had this type of colorful decorations on their braids and dreadlocks, that's why I also posted these reference photos for Asha's hairstyle.

-Finally I decided that Asha would not have all her hair full of braids or dreadlocks, but only a few accompanied by these decorations with a great variation of colors, although it was fun to sketch the many hairstyle options that I had in mind based on these concept art and other photos that I had saved

TATTOOS:

-Another detail that I liked was giving Asha some tattoos with designs from the Amazigh culture, because I saw that it was quite common for women to get them, the tattoo on her forehead is a symbol of protection against bad influences, that's why the The middle symbol is responsible for deflecting it in the 4 directions, I also added a similar one in Asha's right hand.

ASTROLOGY AND THE SPACE:

-An important part of Asha's rewrite is her knowledge of astronomy inherited from her father, especially with the stars for obvious reasons xd, so in addition to adding constellations to her dresses, research the meaning (or something like that) of the planets. Only 3 really reminded me of the character, which were: -Mars: Symbolization of the internal conquering function of moving forward, independent, self-determined, enduring failures with new energy, courage and energy to fight for your desires. -Saturn: Maturity, effort to solidly build realistic criteria, frustrations are transformed into objectives to continue growing, critical and realistic, far from getting frustrated when an objective does not work, you strive to move forward and obtain even more resistant and solid achievements, perseverance , and tenacity (I feel like yhis it the most similar to Asha :D) -Moon: protective role, feeling very vulnerable outside your known areas, feeling of security with your ties, importance of family ties. The one that reminded me the most of Asha was Saturn, that's why I drew those Saturn-shaped earrings :).

SUITS:

I looked for references and placed some on milanote, I noticed that the concept art was mainly divided into whether the dresses have lilac colors or warm colors, I decided to draw 2 models based on the discarded designs, although at first I thought of using only one color palette lilac and bluish, I realized that the reddish colors of her dress reminded me of Mars which has certain meanings that in my opinion coincide with Asha's personality. In the end I didn't decide what wardrobe she would primarily have 😅, but I like to think that in this version of Wish, Asha would have wardrobe and hairstyle changes like in some older Disney movies.

-These are some of the concepts that I mainly used for my version of the dresses

FINAL COMMENTS:

I am satisfied with the result, it was fun to make all this, although what I researched mostly seems little, it actually cost me several hours and I did it at night, so as a funny fact the next day I was explaining all this information to my mother and I felt like I looked like that:

(Make this drawing was so funny LMAO)

(Apologies if there are errors in my writing, English is not my first language and my writing is very basic)

[fallingfavourites]

òh boy this one's even longer, BUT I AM EXCITED!!!,

FIXING WOUNDS IM WEAK 😭😭,

and if you kick me out of the country petertingle-yipyip then who will be giving you reactions/reviews in detail about the mag series??? Oh thats not... in a sense that-

thought of this just rn idk thought it was funny

AH FLASHBACK JUMPSCARE, YHIS IS TOO CUTE STOP IT RN WHY CANT RHEY BE HAPPY 😭😭😭

- You had always thought yourself synonymous with bloody knuckles and gun powder. You wanted to be something to fear, to make people afraid to hurt you. But when Matt was around, all your jagged edges seemed to be rounded out. - YOU ARE MAKING E CRY THIS ISNT GUNNY,

-“Untouchable. Like she’s fighting a losing battle…” -  BUT YOU'RE UNTOUCHABLE BURNING BRIGHTER THAN THE SUN AND NOW THAT YOU'RE CLOSE I FEEL LIKE COMING UNDONE

SORRY LET ME FOGUS ANF BE SERIOUS,

now why isn't she just telling matt that she knows dex?? is it to not make him worry about her as she keeps working with him or does she have a plan??? idkidk,

-“Your experience.” He chuckled. “How many military men do you have experience with?” - like at least 4 right??? marc, frank, billy and now dex or am I just completely forgetting someone?? idk, well I mean minus frank (and Marc idk for sure) if we're talking sleeping with them,

BILLY SHOT HER OMG SPIN OFF LORE SPIN OFF LORE, -“Y’know, I really thought we could make it..”- I was smiling and having a good time until I read this😐,

-"...He slammed me a few times..." - GIRL IT WAS MORE THAN JUST A FEW TRUST ME,  -“Yeah, just… Just let me hold you for a little longer.”- THEY MAKE ME FEEL THINGS

-...But there was a familiar tug as well, like a string tied from his heart to yours.- INVISIBLE STRING RAAHHHHHH,

- “Devil’s in the details there, Ray.” You added carefully. - PEACE REFERENCE, omg j jonah jameson and the bugle mentioned !!!, nonono their gonna get into an argument over dex when they were just slowly getting closer😭😭,

I SWEAR ANYTIME YOU WRITE AN ARGUMENT I JUST GET SUCKED RIGHT IN ITS TOO GOOD,

-“Was it ever real? My feelings for you.” He didn’t know why he kept going, but he did.- Oh... oh thats not... IM GONNA BEAT HIM UP, BESTIE STOP IT THIS ISNT FUNNY

I need 3-5 business days to recover from that argument holy fucking shit, BESTEI THATWRITING WAS INTENSE OMG, how am I supposed to continue now jesus,

omg their back to bickering(arguing) on the job😭 very nostalgic tbh, ex interacting with dex and talking about herself to me him mad is so funny😭,

OMG NOT THE FACE REVEAL

BESTIE THIS IS CRAZY HOW CAN YOU END IT LIKE THIS, I NEED MORE AAH BUT I GOTTA OR ELSE ILL PASS OUT BUT WOWIE 13/10 AS ALWAYS !! I'LL GO SLEEP NOW AND I CANT WAIT TO GET 5O CHAPTER 6

MAD AT GOD - MATT MURDOCK

Season Three - Aimed To Kill

tags: @mayasaurus--rex @americaarse @dusstory @johnmurphys-sass @ironprincessstranger @astrobees @woowwwee // four // six // masterlist

Pairing: Matt x Reader

Word Count: 10,424

Summary: Pages turn and bridges burn as Ex realizes the extent that she’s behind. When sentiment thrives amongst the chaos between her and her first love, question becomes whether they can fix their hearts with the lips that have left scars on each other.

Ray sent you home after your conversation. A team remained for cleanup and analysis, and you offered to help, but you were told to go home. He said for you to take care of yourself, write down whatever important things you didn’t want to forget, and he’d see you in the office for a debrief tomorrow. You tried to wait for Karen or Foggy, but Ray said if you wouldn’t leave on your own, he would walk to your car himself.

You thought about going home, about sleeping off the whole ordeal. But your mindless driving took you to the church. Once you pulled up, your feet guided you through the rod-iron gate out front without hesitation and through the heavy wood doors with your chest growingly inexplicably tighter with each step.

Your feet seemed to know where to go more than your head because before you knew it, you were just around the corner from the gate. You took a deep breath and built the pressure in your chest to a pinnacle. You let it out as a controlled exhale and felt the thrumming of your pulse slow to its usual pace.

“You’re missing the point! He didn’t just find someone to wear my suit.” Matt argued so you stayed around the corner to listen in, hiding your presence behind a bubble of indifference. “He’s as fast and skilled as I’ve ever seen, and I couldn’t take him. He found someone to kill me.”

“Matthew.” Sister Maggie tried.

“I was stupid enough to think that I had Fisk cornered. He knew I’d find the witness and I just brought the sheep to the slaughter.”

You shook your head slightly, feeling that slap of guilt.

“Jasper Evans is dead. He’s dead and he leaves a son behind and that’s on me! … I was so sure that I was finally out in front of this bastard. God, and I was stupid enough to put Y/N in the middle of it.”

You stepped inside quietly and stood beside Maggie. Her head snapped towards your sudden presence, but she offered a small, thankful smile. You gently took the cloth from her hand and moved towards Matt. He jerked away from your touch but you grabbed his sleeve and pulled him back. He huffed in annoyance and you quietly rolled your eyes.

“Fisk knew I thought that I had him. He was waiting for me.” Matt’s rant continued, though his anger was now wavering between that heat - a heat that so familiarly blasted from him - and suffocating guilt. “Of course he was waiting for me.”

You worked calmly and quietly as you began undoing the buttons of his shirt. 

“Foggy and Karen could’ve been killed.” Matt tried.

Your movements paused at the last button when you realized he was right. But your head cocked in thought when you also realized that they weren’t killed. He hardly touched them… Why kill everyone else but them? “And there would’ve been nothing I could’ve done to stop it. Nothing.”

“You’re losing blood. Let me stitch you up!” Maggie insisted and Matt’s brows furrowed slightly, clearly having assumed the person touching him was the familiar nun.

“I listened to you. I listened to you and they almost died.” Matt continued, though one bloodied hand reached forward and found your face.

You couldn’t hide the smile as his thumb traced your features. He closed his eyes and let out a soft sigh, his mouth threatening to reveal a smile. That prior tightness in your chest dissipated almost instantly when you saw that you still meant something special to him. While their conversation continued, you were thinking of an old memory from college.

————————————

“Does that even work?” You giggled and dropped on the bed beside Matt. He turned his head in your direction with a content smile. “They do it on TV but is it actually a thing?”

“It helps, yeah.” He nodded. “You don’t have to though.”

“Do you want to?”

He gave a small shrug. “Foggy’s pretty much told me what you look like. The guy couldn’t stop talking about you for a week after we first met. It was always ‘how did we not know she was in our classes?’ and ‘how is a girl like that trynna be a lawyer?’.”

“Huh.” You propped yourself up on your elbows. “I’m gonna kick Franklin’s ass.” You laughed before sitting up fully and patting Matt’s chest. “C’mon, get up.”

“Why?” He asked, though he did as he was told.

“So we can do this.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”

You could tell he was trying to keep down his smile as his hand hovered near your cheek. You felt a twisting in your stomach and realized for the first time in a long time, you had butterflies. Your skin was buzzing with excitement as you waited for Matt’s gentle touch. He giggled quietly and pulled his hands away.

“What’s wrong?” You laughed.

“Nothing.” He insisted with a grin. “Nothing, I swear.”

Your brows raised expectantly and he licked his lips with a smile as he raised his hands again. You laughed to yourself and grabbed his wrists to guide his hands. You slid his fingers into your hair at your temples and his thumbs ran along your forehead, following the path of your hairline.

You watched his expression shift, though there was always a smile on his face. His brows raised and furrowed as his thumbs continued to travel your face, skimming over your eyebrows as his fingers traced the curve of your ears. You giggled slightly when he got your eyes and the touch against your lashes made your eyes close.

“Can you smile?” He asked softly when both palms slid to your cheeks.

Your eyes opened and you saw the soft expression he wore. That look alone was enough to bring out an honest smile, thinking about how sweet and honest Matt was. He gave you a chance to be soft in a way you never had before. You had always thought yourself synonymous with bloody knuckles and gun powder. You wanted to be something to fear, to make people afraid to hurt you. But when Matt was around, all your jagged edges seemed to be rounded out.

His thumbs traced your cheeks to the bridge of your nose. You bit down the smile as his pointer fingers made their way to your lips, gingerly tracing the shape. One hand fell away while the other gave your cheeks a gentle squeeze, making you laugh.

“What was that for?” You asked and he laughed with you as he pulled both hands back to his lap.

“Nothing.” He answered innocently. “You’re beautiful, Y/N.”

“Thanks, Matt.. So are you.”

“Yeah?” His brows raised as a slight pink tinted his cheeks.

“Yeah…” You smiled softly. “Y’know, I’m really glad we met.”

“Me too.”

————————————

Maggie tapped your shoulder and you pulled back into the present moment. You turned to see her handing you a bowl with the supplies to stitch him up. She offered a quick nod before disappearing and you blinked the pink tint from your vision.

“I don’t know if I can beat the man he sent to kill me, Y/N/N.” Matt confessed softly as you moved across the room to wash your hands.

“Have you forgotten everything I taught you?” You asked simply.

“I’ve thought about everything between us a lot lately.” He said softly, all anger fading to the back for a moment as he appeared at your side. “Good and bad.”

“And there’s been a lot of both.”

“Mostly my fault.”

You turned to him with a clean wet cloth in hand. You gently grabbed his jaw and turned his head down towards you. He snorted a quiet chuckle while you gently cleared the blood from his nose and mouth.

“Well I’m not exactly a cake walk to have around… Just ask Marc. Or Billy. Or Frank. Or either of my cousins.. Hell, you could ask Karen.” You laughed slightly.

“I’m serious, Y/N/N.” He offered a small, lopsided smile.

“Y’know, I thought you might've turned off your heart, cause that just wasn’t you last time I saw you, when we were at Jasper’s.. But this guilt makes more sense.”

“You don’t seem very fazed that our friends could’ve died.” He commented as your hands returned to their place in his chest and began stitching him up.

“Yeah...” Your brows furrowed as you thought back to your realization from just moments ago. “They could’ve. But they didn’t.”

“He knew from the start, since I went to the prison. He knew I’d find Jasper.”

“Shut up for a second.” You shook your head, pausing your hands to let your brain work through your thoughts. You slowly began tapping your finger against his chest and he looked down at you with raised brows. “So why didn’t he kill them?”

“What?”

“The imposter could've killed them both. You were down and I had barely gotten to my feet, which was after he had already pulled a trigger on Jasper.” You stopped and turned your head up to face Matt again. “He doesn't seem like the kind of guy to give chances. So why not kill them too? Why not kill all of us?”

“Cause that wasn’t the plan.” Matt finished.

“No… He wasn’t sent to clear the place. The journalists and whatever damage he did from that was his own idea, probably only killing people that fought back. He was sent to send a message. To me and you, to the public, and every crime syndicate in New York. If he can wreck your public image, it shows that the people can’t trust you anymore. And by making it look like you’ve snapped and you work for him now, criminal groups across the city will see him as untouchable.”

“FBI protects him inside. Daredevil protects him outside. Makes it look like not even Exodus can’t touch him.”

“Untouchable. Like she’s fighting a losing battle…” Your fingers continued the steady movements to stitch him up. “We’ve gotta find this guy sooner rather than later.”

“I couldn’t stop him, but you could.” His brows furrowed but you ignored the look he gave you and focused on finishing the stitches. “How’d you know how to beat him?”

“His first instinct was to throw the club, which told me pretty much everything I needed to know.” You explained, though it was partially a lie. “He was strong, sure. But it was easy to tell his advantage was with distance and projectiles. When you two were going at it, he had trouble blocking everything which showed a lack in hand to hand experience. I saw a fighter that relied on brute strength or distance. The way he carried himself reminded me of the military, and in my experience, military men can’t defend against me very well. He couldn’t get me until I let up or got distracted.”

“Your experience.” He chuckled. “How many military men do you have experience with?”

“I don’t owe you that answer.” You said simply.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean that’s not a very discreet way to ask who I’ve been sleeping with.”

“What?” He feigned innocence.

“I know you were at the apartment. What gave it away?”

“I could smell the colognes in the bedroom.” He admitted.

You let the silence settle for a moment until he began fiddling with his fingers.

“Four.” You finally answered and his brows raised in mild shock. “Two of them would’ve been recent enough that you could tell but they were just to pass the time. Well that’s kind of a lie. I was starting to like one of them until he turned around and shot me. The other two of them actually mattered, but one of them’s like my family. They’ve never been in the bedroom like that.”

“Hmm… Couch?” He tried to joke.

You smacked his arm.

“Neither of them have been in the apartment.” You specified.

“Your math is wrong, by the way. That was five.”

“No, it’s four.. There’s some overlap.”

“Would I uh… Would I know any of them?”

“Names, yes. Actual people, some. And to answer that other burning question that’s stamped on your forehead, no. I never slept with Frank.”

“I didn’t-“

“You assumed the only military guy we had in common… You were dead. What else was I supposed to do?” You gave a small shrug and dropped the supplies to the sink.

“I know.”

“Y’know, I really thought we could make it..”

“We still can.” He said softly, as if the words would break him. As if admitting those words in your presence was the last crumble of his resolve to stay away in the name of your protection.

And maybe they did. All you knew for sure was that whatever hard casing had shattered in your chest earlier that night, it would never fully solidify again. You were each other’s greatest weakness. The clearest vulnerability, but your greatest strength came from each other. Your best feats came when you two were together. Fisk knew that, and that’s why he wanted to separate you two.

Matt waited for you to turn back towards him and when you did, he took your hand and guided you to the small bed tucked in the corner.

“The suit he was wearing...” You remembered, hoping to redirect the conversation to the fight.

“Yeah, it was perfect.” Matt agreed.

“I think we’ll need to see Melvin.” You sighed and turned to him.

His brows furrowed as his head tilted, listening in on something. Your head cocked as you watched and waited for him to talk about it.

“Are your ribs bothering you again?” He asked suddenly. “It sounds like the bones are rubbing together.”

“Probably. He slammed me a few times and I took a tumble down the stairs earlier but it doesn’t hurt.” You sat up taller to prod the area but Matt’s hand was already pressing against the bones while the other was against your back for stability. You winced sharply and grabbed his wrist. “Yeah, they’re busted. I’ll deal with it later.”

“I can’t really feel it. Can I…” He gestured to your shirt.

You shook your head softly but stripped off your jacket and button-up. You gave Matt a side eye as you undid the velcro straps on your vest but he held a look of innocent concern. You pulled the vest over your head with a wince, leaving you in the black compression top that was underneath.

“Don’t think you're gonna get me out my clothes that easy anymore, Murdock.” You teased and he smiled as you guided his hands back.

“Guess I still got it.” He answered lowly as he pressed against your rib cage. You let a sound between a whine and a groan, which made Matt quickly turn to face you. “Never heard you make that sound before.”

“Shut up.” You rolled your eyes in amusement.

“What about your hip? Where the knife went in?” His fingers slid down and pressed the joint of your hip.

“It’s fine, should be just a scar by now.” You looked down at his hand and saw the dark purple shapes on the back of your forearms from where you blocked the baton earlier that night. You hummed in acknowledgment and lifted your arms to better see the bruises.

Matt was quick to reach up and run his fingers along your skin, feeling the slight swelling of the discolored area. He sighed slightly and leaned forward, sliding his hands to have a better grip on your hips. He offered a quiet, pleading expression and gave your body a slight pull. You hesitantly scooted closer, lifting a leg to rest on his lap.

“My last fight was a lot worse. Still got out better than you did.” You said softly, brushing your fingers across his forehead to move his hair back. “You feeling okay?”

“Careful, Y/N.” His eyes closed and a small smile crossed his lips. “I might start to think you still love me.”

“I wouldn’t be down here if I didn’t.” You confessed quietly. “I had to make sure we didn’t lose you again.”

He shifted back on the bed slightly and pulled your hips again, this time pulling you over his lap. He draped your arms over his shoulders before his hands ran up and down the sides of your thighs. You leaned your forehead to rest on his and he tilted his head back so his lips brushed yours.

“You know there are some things we need to talk about.” You said quietly.

“I know..”

“And I can’t stay down here forever.”

“Yeah, just… Just let me hold you for a little longer.”

You nodded slightly and his arms snaked around your waist, allowing you to wrap yours around his shoulders.  You leaned forward to drop your head against his shoulder and his chin rested on top of your head. He took a deep breath and his arm held you a little closer. In turn, you felt a rattling in your chest. The sensation was true for what you and Matt felt about your current relationship. Uncertain, shaky at best with a cracked foundation. But there was a familiar tug as well, like a string tied from his heart to yours.

“I don’t want you to get hurt because of me anymore.” He mumbled against your shoulder before he pulled back. “I can’t keep you with me.”

“I can protect myself.” You answered with a small smile. “And I can feel that you want me here, Matty. You can say whatever you want but you can’t hide that longing in your chest.”

He hesitated to go any further, though his hands held you a bit tighter. You let your own hands run up the back of his neck and your fingers pushed into his hair. He let out a chuckle in relief and pressed his lips fully against yours.

Your lips moved together as if no time had passed. You let out a soft moan when he gently pulled you closer and you let all your guards crumble away.

Suddenly, Matt could feel her pulse against his skin with the small noise she made. He could hear more than just the bones rubbing together in her chest. He heard the way her heart was pounding and her breath was growing shallow. He slid his hands up to the exposed skin of her sides and he loved how he heard her heart pick up and the gasp that fell from her lips. He continued to push his hands under her shirt until his fingers found the hem of her bra.

His head was screaming for him to let her go, to force her to leave and keep her safe. He was yelling at himself to say something hurtful, to break her heart and send her off hating him. He knew she’d be safer that way, as far away from as she could get. But Matt recognized that she wouldn’t go for that. She’d never leave his side if she had a choice, and she wouldn’t let Matt take that choice from her.

She pulled her lips away just enough to offer a small, silent nod. She helped him remove her shirt and to stifle the groan. Once the fabric was gone, Matt gently switched positions so she could lay on her back. He carefully climbed on top of her and felt her hands trail down his chest. His eyes closed as her fingertips ghosted over the various scars across his abdomen, as if she wanted to see if they were still there. Maybe that was how she could convince herself it was real, that he was real. He felt her hands falter on one that she wouldn’t know, one that came from Midland Circle. But he knew she wasn’t feeling it in a bad way. She was feeling it to remember it, to add it to the memory she kept of his body.

He had added a few new scars of hers to his memory as well. The tattoos at the back of her neck. Deep lines around her wrist that were interrupted by a shallow circle on either side, a short but raised mark near her belly button. The newest one at her hip that he had yet to feel. He felt the slight divot along her jaw earlier that night. Whatever she had gone through in his absence, she’d never be able to forget it. He still wondered what happened, but in those moments where he had her hands and lips on him, he couldn't bring himself to stop and ask. He decided it would be a story for another time.

The moment only broke when Y/N gently pushed his chest away.

“Maybe this isn’t a great idea..” You said gently.

“Yeah..” He answered simply, as if that was the reaction he expected from you. “You’re probably right.”

“I still wanna stay.” You offered as he moved to lay beside you.

“I thought you couldn’t.”

“Tell me to go and I will.”

“And if I want you to stay”?

“Tell me and I will.”

You woke later that night - or maybe it was early morning - when your phone was ringing on the floor. You freed yourself from Matt’s arms and slid from the small bed to the floor. You found your phone in your jacket and leaned your back against the bed while you answered.

“Yeah?” You mumbled, eyes still closed and sleep dripping from your voice.

“Hey.” Dex’s voice answered and it felt like you were slapped awake. Every muscle in your body tensed as you expected an accusation of your alter ego. “Just callin’ to see if you’re home. I wanted to come by.”

“Isn’t it kinda late for that?”

“I was just hoping we could talk.. I heard about what happened at the Bulletin.”

“They’re talking about it already?” Your brows furrowed. 

“No, not really.” He said carefully and it was clear he was fabricating his lie as he went. “Ray told me you got a little banged up and I should check on you.”

You knew you had to redirect the conversation quickly or else he might realize that he didn’t see you there, if he hadn’t realized already.

“You don’t have to. I’ve gotten worse than a few bumps and bruises. But hey, while I got you, I wanted to ask if there was any word on your leave? I didn’t get a chance to see if Ray knew anything.”

“Uh… No. No, I haven’t heard anything. No.”

“That’s too bad.” You feigned disappointment. “Tonight probably would’ve been different if you were with me.”

“Yeah…” He paused on the other line and you knew you still had some hooks in him you could pull. “Well, I guess I’ll let you go. Sorry to wake you.”

“Don’t worry about it. Hopefully I get you back with me soon, yeah?”

“Yeah… Yeah, soon. Back with.. with you.”

When you walked into work that morning, you were immediately blasted with familiar feelings from Karen. You followed that calling and ended up in the conference room with Foggy and Karen on one side and Ray on the other. Karen let out a tense sigh and jumped to meet you in a tight embrace, so tight you had to swallow the groan when she squeezed your ribs. Foggy was next, a short embrace followed by a tap on your arm.

“Y/L/N. Glad you’re here. How do you feel?” Ray asked when you stood beside him.

“Little banged up.” You gestured to the still red cut on your forehead. “But I’m not sitting this out. I get you had to pull me from the Murdock investigation but you’re letting me stay on this thing.”

“Yeah.” He gave a small smile. “Wouldn’t do it without you.”

“Great.” You nodded and took a seat beside Ray. “Fill me in.”

“We were addressing that, according to her own paper, Ms. Page has met Daredevil at least twice.” He explained and slid a paper across the table, citing the articles Karen had written.

“That psycho’s not Daredevil.” She countered and shoved the paper back.

“I got a pretty good look at him, too. Could’ve fooled me.” Ray countered, not acknowledging that you had told him something similar the night before.

“Do you think every fat guy with a white beard and red suit is Santa Claus?” Foggy countered and you had to smile.

“If he comes down my chimney and leaves presents under the tree.”

“Devil’s in the details there, Ray.” You added carefully. “That guy would’ve acted like Santa. If he did all of that, this guy didn’t act like Daredevil.”

“Based on how many encounters?” Ray turned to you.

“Couple.” You shrugged.

“He doesn’t kill people, ever. It’s not Daredevil.” Karen insisted. “Did you ever look into Felix Manning? Red Lion Bank?”

“They’re on my to-do list.”

“This is bullshit.”

“Look, Karen, he dropped your name.” You added but you weren’t speaking to her an FBI agent. You were speaking to her as her friend, as her vigilante friend, and she knew that. “He had a chance to kill you, but he didn’t. You were the one person left untouched. I know this seems like bullshit but we need to get these pieces to line up somehow.”

“It won’t.” Foggy cut in. “Not until you two start asking the right questions.”

“And what are those, Mr. Nelson?”

“How about this? Where’s Matt Murdock?” Ray interjected, looking at Foggy and then you.

You simply shrugged.

“Yet another fine example of a question that’s besides the friggin’ point!”

“You were supposed to deliver him to us-“ He gestured between the two of you. “-but there are zero Matt Murdocks in my custody.”

“And zero Jasper Evans left alive.” Karen added. “He killed the one person who had dirt on Fisk, but you knew that already. Is that why you don’t wanna go there?”

“Ms. Page.” You warned.

“What? That nut job did Agent Nadeem a huge favor. Now there’s no one left to tell the world what a fool Fisk is making of the FBI.” Karen continued.

“Did you know Daredevil was-“ Ray began.

“Daredevil imposter.” You cut in, earning a look of disbelief from Ray. “I’ll show you later.”

“Regardless.” He turned back to Karen. “Did you know he was gonna attack the Bulletin? Is that why you brought your gun?”

“Oh, come on.” You groaned as Foggy announced “We’re done here.”

Your friends were quick to leave the room, leaving you and Ray.

“What are you doing? I thought you didn’t get a good look at him.” Ray said lowly, almost angrily.

“No but you know who did, other than Karen?” You reached into your pocket and pulled an old thumb drive. “Outside my door this morning. I already checked it and it’s clean. No malware, no viruses, no tracking. Just a comparison of this Daredevil and the real Daredevil.”

After you left Matt the morning before work, you downloaded the footage from your mask. You found a few shots of Dex in the suit and downloaded those frames as pictures. You found a few old shots of Matt in the suit that matched the same framing and downloaded those as well.

“Do I wanna know who gave this to you?” He asked as he carefully took it.

“I wouldn’t be able to tell you.” You shrugged. “Could be an amateur photographer. I know Jameson at the Bugle is always looking for freelancers. Just give me a chance to explain it all, okay? I’ll be right back.”

You hurried out of the room and found Karen and Foggy not too far across the office.

“Evans wouldn’t have come to Bulletin if I hadn’t threatened his son.” Karen said sadly.

“His son will be alright.” You said honestly as you joined them. “My cousin is gonna get in touch and let him know, give him some money and help him start over. It’s not ideal but he’ll be okay.”

“We need to find Matt and-“ Foggy tried.

“No, I’m gonna head to the hospital.” Karen cut in, her voice weak with regret and guilt.

“Call me if you need anything.” You offered on her way out and she nodded. You sighed softly before facing Foggy again and speaking quietly, pulling him a few steps to the side. “Matt’s okay. I checked on him last night.”

“You know where he is?” His brows furrowed.

“Yeah, I guess I always had a feeling. I took a chance and it worked out.. Anyway, he’s a little worse off than me but he’ll be fine.”

“You guys have anything?”

“Sort of.” Your head tilted back and forth. “I’ve got some ideas and a basic construct, but we’ve gotta go to the guy that made the suit in the first place.”

“Think he’ll talk?”

“Yeah, he’s a good enough guy. Fisk had to have twisted his arm to get him to go along with it.” You nodded. “I’m gonna look into it on my lunch, assuming he doesn’t go rogue and do it without me.”

“I’m glad you two are working together again. What does it mean for you two?.”

“I don’t know yet, but my priority is keeping you three safe. I don’t care what I have to do.”

“Y/N.” He sighed.

“Y/L/N!” Ray called from down the hall. “Back to work. Let’s go.”

You patted Foggy’s arm and headed back into the office, following Ray towards a meeting with the warden. Ray filled you in quickly on the walk that you two were going to figure out how Jasper got out in the first place.

Apparently fake books wasn’t the most obvious solution.

You sat on the edge of the desk while Ray handled most of the conversation.

“How did some just check the wrong box?” You chuckled. “If you can’t give me a legitimate path to investigate, it’s gonna fall on your head. Forging federal documents is a crime and you will be serving time if you don’t give us answers. And something tells me those prisoners would love to spend some time with you.”

He stared at you and Ray and you felt the panic. He knew he was cornered, but he was also a coward. Whatever Fisk held over him, it was worth a jail sentence.

“I want my lawyer.” He said finally.

You two were then sitting in the SAC’s office and running over what had just happened. You were quiet while Ray went over everything. He told her what happened with Karen, what Jasper was supposed to say, what happened with the warden. 

“You believe Evans?” She looked to you.

“Why would he risk his life for a lie?” You shrugged. “And if the warden had nothing to hide, why bother with lawyers?”

“Alright. We gotta kick this up the chain. I’m calling the ADIC.”

“And tell him we don’t know all the facts?” Ray questioned quickly.

“There’s a damn good chance Fisk is manipulating us.”

“I warned you guys this would happen.” You muttered and crossed your arms.

“Shut it.” She pointed firmly to you.

“We need two days. Let us get all the facts.” Ray tried and you had to admit, you admired his determination. “When we can prove Fisk had been playing us, we can bury that son of a bitch together.”

“Leave him to fend for himself against all the people he’s burned.” You agreed. 

She shooed you two away and said that you had forty eight hours. You and Ray went back to his office and were comparing the images from your thumb drive.

You pointed out the height differences. Dex had at least two inches on Matt. You showed the difference in jaw shape. Dex’s was more square compared to Matt’s rounded chin. The facial hair difference was clear. Dex stayed clean shaven while Matt opted for light scruff. Their builds were different too, slightly broader shoulders and a narrower waist on Matt. With the photos in front of him, Ray couldn’t deny that they were two different men.

Throughout the day, you learned that the FBI had raided a workshop where Melvin Potter was working, a man who had helped make suits and protection for Fisk. But that was the same man that made yours, Matt’s and now Dex’s suits. You heard talk of a second man there, but only Melvin was in custody. You felt terrible, knowing that when you went to Melvin on your own for help he was more than willing. Now, there was nothing you could do for him because Matt went without you.

You skipped going with Ray to talk to Fisk that night. You told him you didn’t want to see or hear anything from him. You didn’t feel like dealing with more lies so you just headed home. Ray asked if you wanted to come to a small promotion party, just so you didn’t have to be alone, but you politely declined.

You were just getting to your building when you got a call from Maggie asking if you knew where Matt had gone. You answered honestly, that you had no idea but you’d find him. You opened yourself to his emotions and found him, still on his way to wherever he was going. You hurried across town, stopping a few houses down from here you thought you tracked him to. You stripped off your jacket and button-up, threw on your long-sleeve top, and grabbed the mask and Bites from your glove box before hurrying to the right house.

“I’m Daredevil.. The real one.” Matt said when you got into the room. You hurried across and pulled him back by his shoulders to get him off Ray.

“Are you insane?” You asked quietly.

“You don’t look like-“ Ray began.

“I buried the red suit.” Matt cut in. “The man who attacked the Bulletin, he resurrected it.”

“You do, however, match the description of a guy who’s been tuning up FBI agents. Does Agent Y/N Y/L/N ring a bell?” Your head snapped to Ray as he continued. “Heard she kicked your ass so bad you ran off. Maybe I should call her.”

You smirked slightly and Matt threw a discreet elbow into your arm.

“It was the last thing I wanted, but you people-“ He pointed a finger in Ray’s face. You reached over and pulled his hand down, bending his finger back slightly to earn a groan. “-didn’t leave me any choice. If you’d just wake the hell up instead of playing into Fisk’s hands. He’s using you, and I think you know it.”

“You went after the guy at the Bulletin.” Ray turned to you. “You didn’t hesitate. Didn’t even look at the other agents in that stairwell. Why?”

“Because I know who my partner is.” You put a hand on Matt’s shoulder. “And I know who my enemies are. He would’ve killed you too, Agent Nadeem.”

“Who do you think the real danger is here?” Matt added. “Me or him?”

The conversation paused for a minute while Ray had to redirect his son back upstairs.

“Let’s say I believe the two that just broke into my house.” Ray said tightly. “What do you got?”

“The man who attacked the Bulletin dressed as Daredevil… He’s in the FBI.” Matt answered and you felt your blood rush down to your feet.

“What?” You asked quietly. “How do you know?” Matt looked over at you. “How do you know?”

“I found the man that made the suit. He told me that he didn’t know his name, but he knew he was in the FBI. So tell me, which of your agents has Fisk been especially interested in?”

You zoned out for the rest of the conversation. When you got a chance, you snuck out the door. You were quick to change and get back in your car. Instead of going home and ignoring it, you drove to the church. You headed downstairs and waited on the small bed until Matt got there.

“You already knew, didn’t you?” Matt challenged as he stepped inside, tossing his mask across the room while he went to wash his hands.

“You were supposed to wait for me.” You countered.

“Who is he?”

“Why would you think I know?” You stood.

“Who is he, Y/N?”

“I don’t know.”

“You’re lying.” He turned to face you.

“Am I?” You tilted your head with a slight squint. “Or is it that you can’t tell so you’re trying to trap me?”

“Why are you protecting him?” He shouted and your jaw clenched. The worst part was that you didn’t know how to answer that.

You didn’t know if you were or if it was to protect Matt. If you took down Fisk, Dex would go down too. Start at the top and the bottom crumbles. Matt couldn’t face Dex on his own. He’d already proven that. He needed your help, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

“I’m trying to protect you but you won’t listen to me!”

“Listen to you? Listen to you? Y/N, you’ve been lying to me! Why should I listen?”

“Cause you already know you can’t beat him without me.” You said simply, trying to gain some composure. “Whether or not you know his name, he will beat you every time. Next time, he will probably kill you.”

“Why didn’t you stop it?”

“How was I supposed to do that?” You scoffed. 

“You know how. It gets you everything you want, doesn’t it?”

“What, this?” You raised your brows and pulled fear to Matt’s surface, watching him cough and choke slightly before clearing it away. “I can’t control everyone.”

“That’s how you knew how to beat him.” He continued and you didn’t bother arguing. “Because you know exactly who he is.”

“I have an idea.” You said carefully.

“Don’t bullshit me, Y/N. You know.”

You didn’t know why you were protecting Dex, but you couldn’t bring yourself to throw his name out there. Maybe it was your own pride. You wanted to take him down yourself. Maybe it was just some loyalty to him as a partner or some pathetic hope that some sliver of a redeemable man was left.

“I don’t have any proof.” You said, which wasn’t a lie. But you did know how to get it.

“Y’know, I knew you were a good liar, but I didn’t think you’d lie to me.”

“Are you seriously talking to me about lying?” You laughed in disbelief. “You lied for how long about being dead?”

“That’s not the same!”

“No, you’re right. It’s worse!”

“My lie didn’t kill anyone!”

“It almost killed me.” You admitted. His brows furrowed as he faced you, trying to figure out what you meant. “The night after Midland, I thought about drowning myself in the tub. Almost did it, too. And the scar on my wrist that you were so interested in last night? Gunshot, nearly bled out from it. I almost died at the carousel because I didn’t care what happened to me.”

“I didn’t make you do that.” He said quietly.

“You didn't make me… You’re right. You didn’t. But you weren’t here to stop me either. And that was your choice. You always knew where to find me, Matt. But you hid out down here.”

“I’m not the one that can make people feel what she wants. You could’ve stopped them from trying to kill you. You could’ve stopped all of this!”

“You aren’t listening to me! You never listen to me!” You shouted and pushed him by his chest. “I only let my powers go so far, because if I don’t, then nothing‘s real.”

“How far did they go with me?” He asked suddenly, and the question seemed to shock him as much as it did you.

Matt realized it immediately after he said it. That was what he was looking for the night before. When he was thinking of what to say that’d be hurtful enough to break her, to push her away for good. It was the idea of challenging the validity of the relationship they had. He let out a small sigh when he realized that what he said had done more than hurt her. It shattered whatever was left of her heart, whatever had just been putting itself back together.

“What?” You asked softly.

“Was it ever real? My feelings for you.” He didn’t know why he kept going, but he did.

“Did you love me when I wasn’t around?” Your eyes fell to the floor as you backed away, a sharp pain stemming from your chest. “Did you still care about me before I came back?”

“Yeah…”

You swallowed the stinging sensation that was climbing your throat and lifted your eyes to Matt, taking careful steps forward. “Did you ever question it before you knew what I could do?”

He shook his head.

“There’s your answer… The worst part of my powers is not really knowing if I’m messing with someone or if it’s real. But I guess I know what it is with you. And I really wanted everything with us to be real. I was as honest as I knew how to be when it came to you, but you still can’t trust me.”

“Y/N, wait.” Matt realized he couldn’t go through with it. He couldn’t let her leave with that kind of hurt, not when it was his fault.

“No. No, you don’t get to try and pull a punch you’ve already thrown. You can’t backtrack this time..” You shook your head and turned to leave. 

“I didn’t mean it, Y/N, please.”

“You always say what you mean, Matt. After everything I’ve done, I thought you would’ve trusted me by now. But y’know what, fine. You wanna be alone? Be alone.”

You turned on your heels and were storming towards the stairs to leave when you felt his hand on your wrist. You reached over with your free hand and twisted his arm over as you stepped underneath and behind him. You kicked out his front knee and forced him down, quickly moving one hand to press at the base of his shoulder. You pulled your knee back and as you drove it forward, his other hand came up to block it. You pulled your foot back again but threw it for a kick this time, only to have Matt catch it by your ankle.

He yanked your forward and you went stumbling, releasing his arm so your hands could catch yourself on the nearest marble statue.

“Would you just listen to me?” He tried as he got to his feet.

“Like you’ve been listening to me?” You laughed. “Like you listened when I begged you not to stay under Midland?”

“How many times do I have to apologize for that?” He asked loudly, throwing his hands to the side.

“I don’t want your apology. I want you to admit you were wrong.”

“I did what I thought would be better for you.”

You let out a loud sound of frustration and moved at him. You threw a roundhouse that he leaned away from but your momentum carried you around so you spun and shot a back kick that landed against his chest. As he stumbled, you did a quick shuffle to replace your feet and reset yourself to face him. Left jab that he knocked away. Right hook that he ducked. A small growl sounded from deep in your throat as you walked in a small circle around him. He kept his hands up in anticipation as he spun with you, trying to keep you in front of him.

“You think all of this is easy for me?” You asked plainly, feeling every inch of your skin burning with your newly soaked anger. “Easy having you alive. Easy having to go against someone I work with, someone who helped save my life. Karen and Foggy and Lantom and Maggie, all of them wanted me to build bonds and create relationships with people so I wasn’t alone anymore. Well, look where it got me!”

“This is why I stayed away, Y/N.” He tried.

“Bullshit.” You scoffed. “You were being selfish.”

“I knew you had a good life. I knew I would only mess it up.”

“You didn’t mess up my life by coming back. You messed it up when you left, when you betrayed me.”

His hands faltered and you used it to your advantage. You moved quickly and slammed a knee against his chest. It forced him back and he grabbed both of your upper arms to keep you close.

“I couldn’t have betrayed you.” He spoke with a gentle firmness, an honest plea for you to believe him. “I never meant to-“

“What we do isn’t an accident! You don’t accidentally stay under a falling building for your ex-girlfriend. You don’t accidentally stay away from your actual girlfriend for months. You don’t accidentally tell someone that you never really trusted them!”

“You think I ever wanted to hurt you?” He countered. “After knowing where you came from, what you were supposed to be and what your mission was, I thought it was only a matter of time before you hurt me.”

“You think I never sat there and wondered if you were pretending? I never thought I was worth anything more than a bullet.”

“I’ve cared about you since we met, Y/N. You were always worth that.”

“I wasn’t!” You placed the other foot against the wall and kicked off , turning you two so you could slam him to the ground. “I loved you!”

“And I still love you! It was real. I know it was. I know it because you brought something to my life that I can’t stand the thought of losing.”

“Then why would you ask if it was real?” You asked softly, heart twisting in your chest.

“I don’t know.” He admitted with a sigh.

“Liar!” You shouted and slammed a fist down.

He moved his head so your fist hit the ground and the impact jolted up your arm. You threw the punch again and again, hitting the same spot in the concrete until Matt rolled you two up to a sitting position. He put his hands on either side of your face in an effort to force your attention to him. He made a small noise of discomfort when his palms met your skin, likely due to the heat still radiating off you.

One hand was shaking, knuckles bruised and bloody from assaulting the hard ground, while the other gingerly held your injury. Reluctantly, your eyes met Matt’s and even though it seemed like he was looking through you, you knew he was focused on you.

“I was convinced…” He began softly and the gentle tone made the heat slowly dissipate. “I thought that I had to hurt you so you would leave. But I… I couldn’t do it, Y/N. I just couldn’t.”

“But you did.” You answered, your voice small and distant. You leaned away and got to your feet, ignoring the disappointment that you could feel coming from him.

Without another word, you left him on the floor.

The next day went about as expected. Ray was looking into a few agents, but he wouldn’t tell you much. You watched from the media room as he flipped through files before pulling the camera log from the wall behind him. You knew he had to have found the time when Dex had turned the cameras off, likely finding a time when you went in after him. You waited until Ray hurried out of the room before you followed. You claimed you were feeling dizzy from the head injury you had gotten at the Bulletin incident so no one tried to stop you. Instead, you grabbed your duffle from the trunk and took off.

You changed your work shirt for your vigilante top in the closest alleyway after following Ray’s car, waiting to watch him for a minute while you fitted your mask into place. He stood in the alley by himself for a minute, but you and Matt joined him at the same time.

“What’s his name?” Matt asked simply, turning his head towards your presence but saying nothing.

“I need to be sure about you two. You guys have a history of hurting people.” Ray said firmly, looking between you both.

“I want Fisk in prison.” You said honestly. “I don’t want to kill your agent, but if he insists on being in my way, I will go through him.”

“I’m not handing you a federal agent if you’re gonna kill him.”

“I’ll get to him whether you give him to me or not.” You stepped closer to Ray but Matt grabbed your wrist. You turned to face him as your skin grew warm. “Get your hand off me.”

“What happened to partners?” Matt asked quietly.

“That would mean you trust me.”

“C’mon, Ex. If this is about last night-”

“If you’re right about him, taking Fisk down is our job.” Ray cut in.

“Oh really?” Matt said flatly so you yanked your arm back. “Because we all know where he’s sleeping these days. But I understand.. If there’s one thing we agree on, Nadeem, it’s the greater good. Like house incarceration in exchange for good intel.”

“Not everyone will like the choices we make.” You added, keeping your voice level. “But it’s up to us to make those choices.”

Matt turned to you. “Sometimes you have to hurt one person to save them, and others.”

“Oh please.” You scoffed. “Just tell us the name, Agent.”

“I need your word that you won’t touch him.” Ray tried and you felt bad.

Dex was someone that Ray had trusted, someone Ray had worked with for a long time. Dex knew Ray’s family and they were friends. They were supposed to look out for each other. But now they found themselves on opposite sides of the law with vigilantes going after them. You wished there was a better way but you had to get Dex away from Fisk, otherwise you’d never lock the bastard back up.

“Our word can’t mean anything to you.” Matt reasoned.

“But I need to hear you give it.” Ray insisted. 

“I need him to testify against Fisk, so you got it.” Matt said simply. “Her, too.”

“You don’t speak for me.” You countered. “But you won’t convince him to switch sides. Fisk has played too many games with him. One more switch and he snaps.”

“You know who he is?” Ray asked you and you gave a small shrug.

“It’s not hard to connect dots if you pay attention.”

“We’ll slip into his place, look for any evidence that ties him to the attack on the Bulletin and to Fisk.” Ray offered, clearly looking for a way to save Dex. “If we find any, we leave it where it is.”

“You can get around a search warrant if we set off the fire alarm.”

“Exactly. But if we don't find anything, the guy goes on with his life.”

“Spit it out.” Matt said plainly. “Who is he?”

You wondered if this attitude was due to your most recent conversation or if that was just who he was, and the softer night you two had was just a lapse in judgment. His accusations from the night before made you wonder if, subconsciously, you had manipulated Matt into that tender moment. Maybe the man you met in college truly was gone.

Maybe only the Devil remained.

“Special Agent Ben Poindexter.” Ray said tightly and you let out a small sigh.

Matt turned towards you and you knew there was accusation in his expression. He had to have remembered the name from when you talked about Dex before Midland Circle, when you were at Anvil and waiting to hear from the FBI. It had to have clicked in his head why you hid his identity. 

Dex was your partner, your friend. He was there for you while Matt was gone. He wanted to fault you for it, and while he didn’t appreciate you hiding that from him, he wasn’t going to bring it up then.

Later that night, you were waiting for Matt on Dex’s fire escape.

You slid open the window when he got there and he moved to let Ray in the front door. You let them wander the apartment while you moved towards the safe in the closet. If he was keeping the suit in his place, that’s where it’d be.

“I can’t call a crew to crack that.” Ray sighed.

Matt moved forward and got to work on it.

“I know the combination. You don’t have to-” You spoke loudly, but Matt ignored you. “And you’re doing it anyway, Great.”

“Wait, he can do that?” Ray asked with wide eyes.

“Not if you two keep talking.” He answered tightly.

You mocked him quietly and tapped your mask. You let it load up before leaning closer to the safe. Your eyes searched each shelf but found nothing out of the ordinary.

“It’s not there.” You said quietly as Matt got the door unlocked.

The boys looked through the safe and found nothing they could use. You were turning to leave when you heard the click of a tape player. Turning back, you saw Matt with Dex’s cassette player in hand as one of his old therapy tapes played.

You sighed slightly and felt a sudden spike of panic.

“What did you leave Poindexter doing?” You asked Ray when you realized it was coming from the direction of the bureau. Your implant pinged in your head and you had a feeling it was Dex. But you couldn’t answer it in front of Ray, so you had to leave it alone.

“Talking to an attorney about a wrongful termination suit. Why?” Ray answered as Matt went through more tapes.

“Because something is going very wrong. He’s about to break.”

As they listened to more and more tapes, you paced the apartment anxiously. The longer you were there, the closer that panic and instability got. When Matt looked towards the door, you tapped your mask and saw Dex coming down the hall.

“Убирайся.” You told them, giving Matt a shove. “Both of you. Out, now. He’s here.”(Get out.)

“You should go.” Matt told Ray.

“No, we had a deal. No evidence means you two don’t touch him!” He insisted.

“I found evidence.” Matt tried.

You groaned slightly as the two argued back and forth. You cracked the door slightly and saw Dex pulling glass adornments off the nearest light fixture. You cursed yourself quietly and shut the door again before grabbing both men by the collars and shoving them out the window.

“Go, now.” You said firmly. “I’ve got the best chance if we’ve gotta fight him.”

“What- Fight him? You said-“ Ray tried but you raised a hand and forced fear to the surface to get him to run.

“Make sure he gets out of here.” You told Matt when he hesitated. “Don’t make me make you.”

“Ex, don’t.” He tried but you did the same to him. But instead of fear, you pulled his betrayal to the surface.

Matt knew it was you. He knew what he was feeling wasn’t that serious. It wasn’t enough to make him abandon you, to leave you to stand against Poindexter on your own. But that didn’t make the urge any easier to fight. So he ran.

When you heard the door sneaking open, you moved the fire escape and pressed your back against the wall. You pulled a knife from your belt and angled it so you could watch his movements. He crept through his apartment carefully, noting the misplaced items and tapes scattered across the table.

“Show yourself.” He called out and you glanced above to find Matt and Ray, but you found no one. It made you wish you had stuck Matt with another comms piece, but blind faith would have to do for the moment. “I know you’re out there.”

One of the glass sticks came flying out and bounced off the railing in front of to knock into your blade. You gasped slightly and stuck your foot out so it landed against you rather than the metal of the fire escape.

“I can see you.” He called as you knelt to pick it up.

“How can you see me from over there?” You answered as you stood carefully. With a blade in one hand, you pulled your gun with the other.

“I was lying. Did you really fall for that?” He replied and you made a face to yourself before stepping out. 

Your gun was raised and the hand with the knife braced your wrist. He stood tense with another piece in hand and ready to throw.

“Well done. Not many people are bold enough to lie to me. What’s your name?” You asked.

“You first, then maybe I’ll do the same.” He nodded towards you.

“Nice try.” You smiled. “But two can play this game, and I have a feeling that I’m better at it than you are.”

“Don’t be so modest. I know you’re that vigilante. Let’s be honest here. You’re Exodus.” His body language relaxed a little as you stared him down, picturing the tension fall away like melted snow. “Badass out in Hell’s Kitchen. Unmatched so far, witty, and brains behind some of the best strategies he’s seen.”

“If you’re looking for a mentor, Dex, I can make sure your time is well spent. I can put you to better use than Fisk can. I’ve never been to prison so it’s not like I’ve gotten caught.”

“That’s your plan?” He chuckled in disbelief. “You and me, best friends?”

“We’ll see how it ends.” You shrugged.

“Okay.” He scoffed. “Wait.. How’d you know my name?”

“I’ve done my research. Ever since you attacked the Bulletin a few nights ago but didn’t kill me and you bragged like you knew me. Like you knew my story with the real Daredevil. I wanted to know who I would be up against. You’re good, I’ll admit it. Fisk made a good choice in picking you, an elite FBI SWAT sniper. And your partner, Y/N. She had some nice words to say, but she’s worried about you.”

“Y/N?” His brows furrowed and the tension rose again. “What did you do to her?”

“We just talked. She wants to save you from yourself.”

“That why she didn’t answer her phone? Did you hurt her?”

“No. But she is a pretty little thing, isn’t she?” You offered a wicked smile and his anger grew sharply.

“Leave her out of this.”

“Should I leave Julie out of it, too?” You mocked.

“What did you do to her?” He shouted.

“Nothing.” You answered innocently. “Yet.”

His head cocked as he silently questioned if you were serious. You took the chance to fire a bullet just over his shoulder, close enough to graze the material of his jacket. When he dropped to the floor, you rushed up the fire escape and slipped into the apartment above. You found Matt and Ray and were able to get them to the ground just as the bullets came in.

“The shot came from across the alley.” Ray said through heavy breathing. Looking over, you saw he was hit.

You were quick to kneel beside him and pull off a glove. You looked to Matt and took in his anger so you could push it to the palm of your hand. You pressed the palm against Ray’s side and he groaned loudly as the faint smell of burnt skin permeated the apartment. It wouldn’t heal the wound but it would at least slow the bleeding.

“I think it came from downstairs.” Matt countered.

“He’s ricocheting the bullets.” You confirmed, ignoring the look Ray gave you. “I’ve seen him do it a hundred times. If he can see you, he can hit you.”

Matt threw a newspaper and rolled to the other side, hiding behind a bookcase. He was talking to you about how many shots Dex had left and the fact that the cops were called when you looked around and realized something. Even from your angle behind the sofa, you could see Matt in the mirror on the door.

“The mirror.” You said to yourself and Ray noticed it at the same time.

You looked around and found a book on the coffee table. You pulled your arm back and threw it as hard as you could against the mirror, watching the reflective surface shatter when the next round of bullets came in. When Matt said to run, you helped Ray out the door before sliding to sit under the window sill. Using your mask to see the floor below, you saw Dex moving to the fire escape.

You pushed Matt out first and as you were climbing out, you saw Dex coming up the steps. You grabbed both railings and kicked both feet against his chest to send your partner tumbling back down. Matt turned around but you pushed for him to keep going. You heard the climbing stop below you just before Matt grabbed your arms and switched positions so he could block the glass sticks being thrown with a trash can lid. 

You two were reaching the roof when one piece came up and cut the strap of your mask, nicking your ear in the process. You grabbed the railing and leaned over to catch it, only to make eye contact with Dex. His arm was already drawn back to throw another one but he froze, eyes wide as he saw you.

You could see him mouth your name but you were too far away to hear it. But you weren’t far enough to miss the heavy hit of betrayal against your chest. You didn’t know what to do but when you saw Dex’s features illuminated by the police flashlights, you snapped from your daze and hurried onto the roof. You paced the area in a panic with your mask tightly in your fist.

“Hey.” Matt said when he realized what was happening. “What’s wrong? Are you hurt?”

“He knows.” You said quickly. “He knows who I am.”

[tendous-socks]

TOKYO REVENGERS HEADCANONS OF ME BEING NON BINARY / REACTING TO SOMEONE BEING NON BINARY

tw: ⚠️⚠️kisaki⚠️⚠️ and manga spoilers, mentions of death, transphobia,

would misgender and dead-name me

1.kisaki.

must i need an explanation?😐

2. shion

“ what’re you gonna do about it?? HUH?? WHAT’RE YOU GONNA DO ABOUT IT ???”

actively looks for a fight

… if y’all are in a relationship he’d still call you his “girl” but beats people up for doing so….

3. mucho

i get the vibes that he’s traditional

would silently stare in judgment

4. mochi

he just doesn’t care clslfkxkslk

thinks it’s weird

“ nor/mal”

7. rindou..

“you either have a pen or a vag. “

8.ran

“interesting”

*continues dead naming me*

9. KOKO

he would be nicer about it when he’s in toman due to inui… but once they’re separated- an ABSOLUTE MEANCE

… reluctantly apart of the protection squad with inui ( enjoys beating people up tho)

10. bontent mikey

… he’s just so tired and doesn’t really care ) that is if you’re not close with him… but then again how close can you really get?)

11. ) PAH CHIN

AND ONLY BECAUSE HE WAS IGNORANT AND HIS FATHER DIDN BELIEVE IN THAT STUFF AND HE DIDNT KNOW BUT THEN ( if y’all are close ) HE’D FEEL BAD AND AFTER YOU EXPLAINED IT TO HIM HE TOLD PEH CHIN TOO AND WERE SURPRISINGLY SUPPORTIVE

but if y’all ain’t close he would slowly get the hint… this is canon.

because i said so-

11. sanzu…

he’s quietly judging you

EDIT

SOMEONE SAID SANZU WOULD USE ANY PRONOUNS AND I REALLY LIKE THAT HC-

SO SANZU WOULD PROBABLY JUST ‘ SILENTLY JUDGE YOU’ SO OTHERS DONT CATCH ON MHMHM

12. akashi

traditional- plus it was a different era for him growing up so…

(would glare at someone if he really did see you getting emotionally distressed)

13. smiley

“ that’s one of the most stupidest shit ive ever fucking heard 😁”

.🙁

“ you either have tits or a dick “

.☹️

but would beat people up if you get SUPER upset ( call it his protect instincts with angry, but would send people to the hospital)

14. taiju

“ i wanna church girl who goes to church and reads her bible “

would spit at me

- WHO WOULD BEAT SOMEONE UP FOR DEAD-NAMING / MISGENDERING

1. PAH CHIN AND PEH YAN

THEYRE ABSOLUTE MENACES TO SOCIETY IF SOMEONE CALLS YOU A GIRL / BOY

head canon : during tenjiku you were there and had to adjust your transtape cause it was coming lose 🙄

which is literally the most annoying thing in the world-

and shion saw you.

he came up and was like “ HUH WHAT’VE WE GOT HERE?? A GIRL PRETENDING TO BE A G-“

couldn’t even finish his sentence with how fast peh chin clocked his ass 🤭

( peh yan supremacy)

2. my main man takemichy

no explanation needed ( maybe deadnamed you only once cause he didn’t know)

3. inui cause i said so

5. BAJI BAJI

BAJI WOULD ALMOST KILL A DUDE FOR CALLING YOU YOUR DEAD NAME

i KNOW mama baji raised him right ✋🙄

almost clocked chifuyu when you told him about your first encounter kcksldofospdoco

almost clocked your mom when she said “you got it girlfriend”

she was confused when she saw you desperately trying to prevent the next criminal minds episode

best listener for body dystrophia fight me 🙉❤️

6. senju

*comes out*

“..oh okay! anyways as i was saying [preferred name] “

would need some gentle reminders only once or twice cause i will say it does take a bit of time for people to get used to it and there are always a few slip ups

tells akashi about your pronouns ( ONLY WITH YOUR CONSENT OFC)

( promises to try and be more girly if he calls you by them and your preferred name)

she wants you to go into more details about what you’re feeling cause she’s genuinely very interested about everything and she wants to know more about you.

7. emma 😻 vv supportive 🙌🙌

*sicks mikey and draken out on anyone who hurts your feelings

“you know [blah blah blah] from history?”

“of course yeah “

“yeah he ended up calling me slur during class- what’re you doing?”

*emma pulling out her phone

“hm? oh nothing don’t worry about it”

gave more insight about it to draken and mikey

8. HINA

YALL SAW HOW SHE SLAPPED MIKEY-

THIS GIRL WOULD D R A G A BITCH BY THEIR HAIR IF SHE SAW THEM BULLYING YOU

the one of correct takemichy

9. yuzuha

hina but 10x worse

trips transphobes for shit and giggles 🤪🤞

i like to think that the girls (all 4) would just all stare down a girl who was shit talking you and just pick her apart mercilessly ( a little ooc but this is my head canons so they can be whatever i say they are)

ones idk about

1. mikey

he knows that you can handle yourself so he lets you correct people.

or

sometimes he’ll jump in and correct them instead for one of two reasons.

1. he felt like it

2. they kept calling you your dead name and misgendering you EVEN THOUGH you already corrected them

but if the person ACTIVELY does that and says some… not so fruity things. he’ll send em to the hospital and end up on life support 😌☝️

like dom tertto, he cares about his family. and toman is his family, and you’re in toman ( not THAT kind of y/n way 🙄 )

“ BE WHO YOU AREE🌈🌈🌈🌈🤪🤞🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈”

1. draken

… listen… idk why, but i just don’t SEE him beating people up for misgendering me… well okay i kinda see it,

but he’d be like, “ i don’t understand what you’re going through, but i support you and if you want to talk about it i’m here”

wants to try and understand so like i said before, he lets you rant about what you’re feeling

would let you handle your own battles cause your strong enough to

a true king 😎🙌

does in fact throw punches when it gets REALLY BAD

2. angry

… idk h o w empathic he is and how mad he’d have to be on your behalf when people actively kept misgendering you to become the blue ogre.

but he’d just start crying at the confrontation.. 😐

my hero ig 🤥

3. izana

“ that’s fucking stupid”

*beats up middle aged woman who said for you to “ have a good day ma’am”

but if y’all close he’ll only say it’s stupid once when he sees you genuinely upset and ignoring him

“ be who you are.. 🌈”

4. kaku

same boat as izana, A LOT less judgmental

5. mitsuya

won’t hesitate to send a bitch flying

actively corrects people

( teaches luna and mana about your pronouns for the next time you come over 🕺🏻)

TAKES YOU SHOPPING FOR CLOTHES

6. haitani brothers

*actively bullies you

*bullies kid into the grave for looking at your chest area

7. …hakkai

he accidentally slipped up once🤒

WHEN I SAY THIS MANS FACE WENT PALE- HE DIDNT TALK TO YOU FOR A W E E K MINIUM CAUSE HE FELT SO BAD

YOU KEPT TELLING HIM THAT ITS FINE-

BUT HE FELT AWFUL

( has nightmares about it)

8. chifuyu would only do it in his mohawk era cause he wanted to seem metal and impress da boys 🥶🥶☝️☝️

pulled you aside at the end of the day to apologize

( like i said before, baji almost clocked him when you told him about your first encounter )

who am i kidding they’re all in gangs, they’d probably kill someone if they hurt you cospwpfoslief

——————

IF YALL GOT ANYMORE IDEAS LMK CAUSE IM INVESTED IN YHIS AND WANNA HEAR WHAT YALL THINK

[lowkeyorloki]

Dove

Anonymous requested: Could you please do a Loki x reader where they’re sorta friends and he starts calling her sweet names like “dove” or “sweetling” and the avengers are so confused but reader is even more confused. So she asks Loki about it and they get together? I hope yhis makes sense lol, ty!

this might be the cutest request i’ve ever gotten... Loki calling the reader ‘dove’ is something i never knew i needed in my life oml

~

The first time Loki calls you something other than your name, you almost don’t realize it. The rest of the Avengers certainly didn’t: The words that came out of Loki’s mouth were so casual, you would have thought he spoke them everyday.

“Here you are, dove.” he says, handing you a mug full of tea. You blink, watching intently Loki as you reach out to accept the warm cup.You expect him to to grin, laugh at you, or at least tell you he didn’t mean to call you that.

To your surprise, none of this happens. In fact, Loki doesn’t even meet your gaze. The most that happens is his fingers brushing yours, and then he sits next to you and listens to Tony brief the team for the next mission.

~

“I’m not going to do that.” you state. Tony rolls his eyes, and Steve looks disgruntled. You stand your ground. “No. The last time you sent me undercover I almost didn’t come back. Why can’t Natasha go? This is her specialty.”

“She’s been doing this for too long. This is a high stakes play, we can’t risk someone being recognized.” Steve explains, and to his credit, he does seem to feel for you. Not enough to find a different solution, though.

You look down, shaking your head, an uncomfortable silence filling the room. You feel a hand on your shoulder.

It’s Loki’s. You’re close to him, more than anyone else on the team. Your friend’s touch is soothing, and you close your eyes, pretending that it’s just you and him, and not another soul in the world.

“Sweet.” he says quietly. You look a him, and this time, you know the nickname isn’t an innocent slip of the tongue. “I know you can do this. We all do.” he nods, and in your mind, you say a slew of curses.

None of them are verbal though. You just look at Stark and tell him you’ll do it. He looks confused that Loki was the one who convinced you. But a victory is a victory. 

~

Damn it. You choke back a yell as Loki twists your arm behind your back, then releases you onto the padded floor. As long as you’ve been sparring, you still never last more than six minutes against Loki. It’s embarrassing, even if he is a literal god.

“Darling.” he helps you up. “You seem to be out of practice.” 

That would happen when you’re distracted. The sweet words, the gentle touches- Something is shifting between you and Loki, and you’re not sure why.

Thor laughs, watching the match from the sidelines of the training room.

“I was unaware she was your darling!” he bellows. Loki raises an eyebrow at you. You scoff.

“I’m not anyone’s anything.” you tell them both. You gather your things to exit the room. Silently, you will Loki to keep up the pet names. 

~

“There’s brush in your hair.” Loki says. The two of you sit in his room, enjoying the peace. You set your book down.

“We were in the woods today.” you remind him. Loki chuckles, and shifts closer to you on his bed. Your cheeks burn.

Loki’s nimble fingers run through your hair, ridding it of leaves and sticks and whatever else he finds. You sit upright, unsure of how to react.

When Loki leans back, you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror to see he’s styled your locks into a braid of sorts.

“Where did you learn how to do this?” you ask, your voice quieter than you meant it to be.

“I spent a lot of time with my mother when I was young.” he explains. “I watched her maids braid her hair many times.”

Your chest feels warm. You almost ask him, right then and there, what’s happening between you two.

“She meant a lot to you, didn’t she?” you ask. Something passes over Loki’s face. Grief, you think. It’s gone almost as soon as it arrives.

“You look tired, sweet.” Loki stands, urging you to do the same. He walks you to your own room. You stop at the door.

Loki leans in, and your heart jumps.

“Sleep well, lovely.” he murmurs in your ear.

Then he turns on his heels and leaves.

~

“I never know what to expect around you.” you confess. Loki laughs.

“There was a time I would have taken that as a compliment.” he responds. 

“You do still take it as a compliment.” you glance at Loki. “You can’t fool me.”

Loki’s light expression drops, and he looks like he’s contemplating what you’ve said.

“No.” he says. “I really can’t.”

It’s quiet for a few moments. For some reason, guilt claws at your chest.

“Loki...” you didn’t realize how close you were. Your knee is pressed against Loki’s, and if you angled your head just right... “What is this?”

Loki looks at you, and he’s near you, but somehow still out of your reach. His breaths hit your nose.

“You’re so eager to make sense of everything, dove.” he murmurs. His lips brush against yours as he talks, and you shiver. “You’re going to drive yourself mad.”

“I don’t understand.” you close your eyes. You hear Loki take a breath in.

“There’s nothing to understand, sweet.” he says.

You feel his lips close against yours, and the feeling goes straight to your head. 

You could get drunk on this, get drunk on Loki, for the rest of your life. You would die happy if the only sensation you ever felt again was Loki’s lips on yours, his smooth voice in your ears. 

Loki cradles the back of your head in one hand, and places the other on your waist. It lets you collapse into him, fully submit and finally let him know you’re his. 

You don’t know how long this is going to last. 

That’s why you promise yourself you won’t be the one to pull away. 

[finding-the-daylight]

It’s been a long, stressful week. So, I’m going to drunk-watch Twilight (this is part 1, I’ll do a part 2 later). So far, I have drunk watched and reviewed Eclipse, Breaking Dawn Part 1, and Breaking Dawn Part 2. I will probably drunk-watch and review New Moon some time in the near future. My sober review of Twilight is that it is the best of all the movies (But New Moon though, I know, it’s a very close second for me). I love that it was meant to be like a cool, niche indie film and Catherine Hardwicke is the best. The baseball scene. The meadow scene. The bio scene. Iconic. Anyway, my drunken thoughts are below the cut as per usual:

- So I know it’s like .0 seconds into this ish, but I just realized when Bella’s tlakign about dying in the place of someone she loves @ the beginning, we see the deer and then in BD2, when the mountain lion tries to kill the deer, Bella kills the mountain lion. Feels like symbolism idk.

- Phil really is like 25 years old lmao. Does it ever say how old he is? He looks young af. 

- Forks seems super depressing. Like the scenery is cool, but like there’s no one there? Only 3,000 people? Boring af.

- everything is so green and blue and aesthetically pleasing, thank you catherine

- i just realized the picture above the shelf with cds is also of a deer. the deer is important.

- the friendship between charlie and billy is all i want in life

- the truck literally brought a smile to my face. and the whsikey. 

- the high shcool looks more like a fancy ass mansion and idk why no one else has ever called out this fake shit

- eric is so precious an we deserved more of hom

- bella playing volleybal is me lamo i’m so uncoordinated at throwing shit liek that hahaha

- i just keep thinking about how anna kendrick forgot she was in this movie. if i played a character as written in canon by smeyer, i’d probably choose to forget it too. 

- mike is so fcking creepy lmao he could’ve been written better but smey r said no

- if people don’t look @ me and my mans on my wedding day the wya they look @ rosalie and emmett int he cafeteria scenr then imma fuking fight

- do not disrecpt carlisle like that hoe he is a flawless mna and deserve your full respecgt

- what the fuck i hate this scnee now that ik now abotu banner fck smyer’s nast y ass

- also lmao @ rob’s face he was foin to fuckng mucj

- wy the fuc did bella wear a bowling shirt over al ong gray shirt?

- my arms feel heavy af right now lmaooooo

- the lady they had play renene lowkey looks like krisen they did a good job casting them

- oooooh hell yeah eyes on fire time bitch

- emmett is my fave pullign up on top the jeep and hopping out like it’s nothing

- this scene is actually pwowrful because bella’s wathcin g the cullens but her human friends try to get her attention so it’s liek she’s being torn between the two worlds. cahterine’s mind

- i duckinf love the aesthetic and scnery of this movie

- mike really said how you likin da rain girlllllll lmao

- when edward apologizes though lowkey that shit’ cute and i would’ve fotgiven him too

- this bitch lied. tlaking about i don’t like any cold thing. homie. you a damn lie.

- “i’m just trying to figure you out” mhy ex said th  same damn thing lmaoooo bitch i ain’t about to let you figre me out unless yo uput a ring on it-

- whne i say edward stopping the van was ome iconic shit i mena inconng

- awww hell ya the hot doc is almost here

the moment i’ve ukjng been waiting on

- i love carlisle i’m so fucking thirsty for this bitch even though i just downed som mufng whiskey

- literally carlisle could get it period.

- rosalie is 1000% a daddy’s girl like anytime someone gives her shit she runs to carlisle and he’s got her back. he only supported edward and bella becaus esme did and she’s a hopeless romatic and carlisle loves that about her. but if it wans;t for esme, edward would’ve gotten his as sent lmao.

- if you see acreepy dude int eh corne of your room what ar you gonna do?

- agaain with the shot of bella being town between the humans vand vamps chathetiner’s mind

- tbh i eel like i know what should’v happened in canon better than smeyr at this poijtn and it’s not canpn that the cullens would’ve gone on a field trip. they just wouldn’t have like it’s extra risk and it’s unnecsary.

- edwar’ds fae when jessica rna upt talking about mike lmaoooooooo

- not gonan lie i love thsit shirt bella’s wearing when they’ra tlaking about la push kind of wanti kt

- the dumbas s salsd

- i want an edward fanvid to  bad guy by bullie easihr lish

- love thatb ella encouageed angela to ask etic to prom. a feminsit quenenne

- why di d theyr rcarst the original embry and quil? 

- when taylor said old scar tsotry the midwest accent popped thef ick out

- i love jow bellas all serious baout this shit and jake doesnt give af he’s like bitch it aint real lmaoooo

- i stan laurent and i’m so angry about what smeer did to him

why do people just layo out in the sun like this lmaoooo

- awww i’m so happy fro angela i love her

- bella was ahrdore fucking femimnist and it should’ee been more cental to the plot fmeinist bella never would’ve tolerated half the shit she tolerated from jale and edwar.snmeyr has no consitnency

- why tf would opu statt wlaking down a dark alley @ night

- edward saves the day from thos ecuckgjn scumbags

- i just relaized they/re usposed to be in wahsingtob but they have fucmngn oregon plates on the car lmaooooo

- but if a dude whopeped his car lioke that idc what kinda car he drove even a volvo that shti sexy aaf

- he looks so fcking angry lmaooooo @ jess and angela

- yhis scene is cute but it also looks like this is where rob regretted his decision t op lay an emo edodei boi

- the older ig et the creeperi it gets to me that edward followed her like yeah it worked and he ended up resuing her but like still creep yas fuk

- carlisle in that coat at the staitons does a lot for me

- if i was chalrie iw ould’ve given her a hwoel ass taser

- someone tell me why bella tbought the book if she was just goign to golg.e it all

- edward weares the same thign evry damn day lmaooooo

- why werent the yf facgtin eah other when bella was tlaking this shit is too mcuh 

- i wouldn’t be afriad eitgher @ carlise

- it would be fun to run tlike that thou lnao m

- the spakrling skin thuing is funny af while durnki thogjh

- eddie bou is so damn emo and overramatic liek bitch yo uuahgt feelings too chill thf out 

- efawrd remind sme s omcuhg of chuck in gossip girl has anyone else thoguth this

- bella striahgtu p toldthis dumbass she was aafrianf onky of losing him and he left her in the next one

- the meadowa as fucking iconing as everrrrrrr

- i;m not gonna make it through this hwole  movie i’m tired watch out for part 2

[leconcombrerit]

Lloyd made me love Sorey.

He really did, going through Symphonia again. I’ve been in a ranting mood recently, and there might be spoilers for Zesty and Symphonia ahead. You’re warned !

Lloyd gets on my nerves. At times, at least. And far from enough to keep me from enjoying the game, but I still rolled my eyes and sighed a goddamn lot throughout Symphonia. It was quite the contrary with Sorey, and seeing them side by side makes me realize how much I love our kind Shepherd. Let me explain.

Lloyd is such an idealist. Other characters point this out, in case anyone hadn’t noticed. Not that I have anything against idealists. I’m quite cynical, so I tend to find them annoying most of the time, but I recognize that we need people like that too. Idealism can be nice, if paired up with empathy. Otherwise, the character just becomes a self-righteous brat that makes people facepalm hard enough to lose all the remaining neurones their cheesy speeches hadn’t killed yet. And Lloyd had the empathy of an especially unsensitive duck. Okay, maybe not that much. But you get the idea. 

Arguable? Maybe. But how did he treat Dorr, when he learnt that he hadn’t stepped up to the Desians? Colette had to stop him and kindly remind him that not everyone was strong enough to stand up to their tormentors. Same with Mithos. A little piece of me died when he told him that he could live anywhere he wanted. “Not everyone can be strong”, as he said. Not everyone feels and reacts the same. “You don’t understand anything”, well no, he doesn’t. But Lloyd insists that he does. Despite their experience and hearts being entirely different, Lloyd feels entitled to tell him how he should feel and react. In that sense, the main antagonist of the story, the very one who wanted to make everyone the same, acknowledges difference better than Lloyd. Ironic much. You could argue that the thing with Dorr happened at the very beginning, but the fact that he acts the same with Mithos at the end (minus the anger, he gained some tact) shows that this peculiar trait of character remains.

He sees the world in black and white, probably because of his idealism again. Mithos points yhis out very clearly too, referring to a “game of good and evil”. This lack of nuance makes him the right guy with right answers for everybody. “The Desians are bad guys, let’s kill all the Desians, regardless of their condition and why they were treated like that”. Well, my bad, he does wonder why they do that. For a split second, before casting that aside to focus on his killing spree. “Kratos betrayed us, he’s a traitor, a bad guy, let’s not even wonder why he did this, we just have to stop him!”, “the Cruxis is horrible, let’s kill them”. I mean, yeah, they’re bad, same for the Renegades at first, but he killed many guards? Who mentioned, in Triet, that they had kids?

This statement isn’t absolute. He learns a lot during his journey, and that’s for the best. But he still assumes that his strength and values should be shared by everyone. He’s like a stubborn kid who’s ready to play dice with the world’s fate, the entire damn world’s fate, just so that he can save everyone, postponing the regeneration over and over to do stuff, and saving Sheena against all advice, and manages through his shining plot armour to survive and. I just can’t. I’m not saying he’s cruel or anything. You could even say that he has a sh*t ton of empathy for the people in the farms and the world as a whole (that he quickly dismisses to save Colette), but even then he mostly says “not another Iselia”, so… His feelings again.

 Sorey on the other hand starts off as this young, innocent and sheltered boy. He’s naïve and tries to help too, but when Lailah (who gets Raine’s role in the sense that she warns him of the consequences of his actions times and times again) talks to him, he understands. He does say he’ll save Eizen. But he also understands when he can’t. He’s focused on his task but doesn’t forget what’s important to him. He chooses to make a huge sacrifice to save the world instead of being a kid and say “I won’t sacrifice myself or my friends, who could die if we do this, we’ll find another way”. The whole concept of malevolence makes it obvious that people can be “weak hearted”, and Sorey doesn’t yell at them for that. He understands, or tries, or acknowledges that he can’t understand. That’s extremely mature for a 17-year-old boy.

People call him bland, and I can somehow get why. He’s not all that expressive. He doesn’t say things, they’re implied, and I would have liked to see more of his emotions on display too. But it makes his fists of fury even more impressive.

They’re entirely different characters and comparing them might be as stupid as comparing a spoon with a fork, complaining the latter isn’t useful for soup. This is just my opinion and interpretation of the characters, to each their own.

Tl;dr : to me Lloyd is a self-righteous kid who can’t take no for an answer and forces his own emotions and strength onto others. Sorey is more reserved and grows an awful lot, and puts so much efforts into understanding other people and finding what’s the best thing to do is. Which is why I love him more. But I still like Lloyd.

He’s just way more of a kid to me.

[angelofthenightposts]

Broken Heart.// Ch.10

 Bill is ready for the next stage of his life after reaching the happy life he can be with the people he loves and the successful career he has always dreamed of. Marrying his fiancé, Alida. But it all takes an unexpected turn when he asks his wedding planner friend, Y/N, to help plan their wedding.

Series Masterlist || My Masterlist.

It's Saturday, and it's a warm and wonderful day. Bill is lying on the grassy ground, gazing up at the sky. The birds are chirping, it’s like something out of a movie. He is alive and cheery; it is ten o'clock in the morning, but he feels as if he hasn't gotten enough sleep due to excitement. They're almost there; traffic was moderate, but the meeting location was outside of town; he decided that a meadow would be the finest spot for a picnic.

When he hears Aria's voice, he is about to fall asleep. He stands up swiftly and extends his arms to the girl who is rushing towards him. He strokes her wavy hair as she hugs him firmly, and she smells like freshly picked strawberries.

“Hello.” You approach him with a picnic basket in your hand, and he greets you with a broad smile before standing up and seating Aria down. He understands that you are nervous after what happened at his house, and he makes every effort to make you feel at ease. You give each other a short hug. He lets you go away and notes that you and Aria are both dressed in the same style. The pinkish dress looks adorable on your daughter, but it's stunning on you. You blush as his stare falls on you, and you immediately avert your eyes and take a seat next to your daughter. “Did you have to wait this long?”

“The most beautiful thing in the world is waiting for you two.” You bite your lower lip and look at Aria, who doesn't appear to get his flirtation. He grins at you and takes a seat next to you, “But no, I didn't.”

As she sees you putting the food out, Aria tell Bill with a deep scowl on her face and a pout on her lips, "I'm upset at you."  You sigh deeply and open your mouth to tell her to forget about it, but she and Bill have other ideas. He asks as to why, and Aria is more than willing to explain. “When I woke up two nights ago, my mother wasn't home, but she said she was with you. How come you didn't invite me to your sleepover?”

“Aria, we didn't plan the sleepover, your mother had to drop something off at my place, and- you know what, I'm sure she'll bring you to the next one,” he says, looking up. “Is that right, Y/N?” You notice four eyes waiting for your words as you open the sandwich wrap for Aria, so you nod and assist her with the first bite.

“Bill, I think purple is the most beautiful color. I like everything in purple.” It's been about fifteen minutes, and everyone except Aria has eaten their sandwiches. She would rather tell her every thought than eat her meal. She chats about anything that comes to mind, and it's clear that she and Bill have already formed a bond. He pays close attention to her, as if he wants to know everything there is to know about her, while you sit there quietly watching them. Aria does her best to stay still and help Bill as he attempt to wipe the peanut butter from her chin. She rolls her eyes and looks to you as Bill creates a worse mess than before.  “He isn't good at it, mommy.” 

“Aria, that wasn't very nice of you, baby.” You advised her; you taught Aria the value of treating people with kindness, even if they are cruel.

She gives Bill a sidelong glance, and before she can say sorry, Bill shakes his head and adds, “She is correct, Y/N.  I'm new to these things. So tell me, are you looking forward to our sleepover tonight?"

Aria smiles broadly and nods her head, "I even packed my new jammies with me. It's has butterflies on it.” A bunch of children ahead of her attracts her attention before she can say anything else about her outfit. Your gaze is drawn to where hers is, and you predict the question she will ask. When she looks up at you, you nod and help her in standing. She turns away from you and begins talking with her new friends. You like Aria's natural ability to make friends, and you suspect it has something to do with Bill's genes because you aren't always the most popular person in the room.

Bill is watching his daughter go ahead and pick up some flowers when it occurs to him that you, too, enjoy flowers as much as she does. “All the beautiful flowers of the world are here,” he says as his fingers glide across the ground to select the best one. "You should wear one in your hair. ”

“The poppy is a delicate flower. It defoliates if you pick it.” He doesn't have to be a rocket scientist to figure out that you're not talking about flowers. He's aware that you've opted not to discuss your relationship until Aria isn't present.

“How about a daisy then?”  He teases you, and you roll your eyes at him, just as he suspects. He reaches you and places the flower behind your left ear. Someone told him that wearing a flower behind your left ear meant you were in love when he was in Hawaii.

“I don't want it, Bill,” you say as you pull the flower and stare into his eyes. His gaze never leaves yours, as it has in the past. You feel like the luckiest lady on the planet when he stares at you all affectionately. You're scared because you haven't stopped loving him; you know he cares about you, but the thought of this not working rips your heart. “Bill, that night, we made a mistake. I don't want to be confused once more.”

He doesn't consider that night a mistake; in fact, he thinks it the happiest night of his life because you both chose to leave everything behind and spend the night making love in his arms. “We acted without considering the consequences. We acted on our emotions. But is that so wrong?"

“Bill, I'm worried. What if we screw up again, what if this relationship between us doesn't work out? So, what are we going to do? We just can't leave; we have to think about Aria this time.”

“Y/N, you need to quit being so concerned about everything. Yes, we're at a loss for what to do next, but you can't keep living like this. I'm anxious, too,” he palms your left cheek, and you close your eyes under his touch. "But all I care about right now is you and Aria. I'm with you, and I'm finally happy again. Could we please live in the moment and not worry about the future?”

“Promise me that you will never abandon me. Promise me that you'll always be there for me, no matter what life throws at us.” 

“I am yours, Y/N, and I can't imagine living without you and our daughter.”

 Bill lays his daughter down on her bed and walks over to the bookshelf to grab one of the fairytale books. He sits slowly on the edge of the small bed as he open the first page of the book which is about the princess and the dwarfs. Aria scoots over so Bill too can lie down; the view is hilarious, Bill's long legs hanging down from the toddler bed, his body not fitting the small space. "Are you ready for a bedtime story?"

“Yes, but first, I'd like to ask you a question.” He places the book on his lap and looks at Aria, who is staring around the room with interest. “Whose room is this, Bill?”

So, what happens next? Bill had no idea Aria would be mystified as to why his house has a room designated for a small child. He licks his lips and considers that being honest with her is the best thing for her future. "It's... uh... my daughter's room.

“Wait, you have a daughter? Where is she now?”

“She's on her way to me, just like your father. Let's get started on the book right away. It's time for you to go to bed." He clears his throat and begins reading the first page of the book aloud, vocalizing the characters and making a little show for Aria to avert her attention.

Aria falls asleep on his chest after a few pages; he places the book on the bedside table but does not get up right away. He enjoys the moment and watches her, taking in every detail about her. Before turning off the light and leaving her room, he plants a small kiss on her forehead. He finds your name on his phone's screen and makes a Face Time call. As Bill lights a cigarette on the small balcony and smiles at you, your face appears on the screen. "I'm going to be bald, and guess that our daughter is finally sleeping."

“Yes, and I wish you didn't have  to leave after dinner, you know. We could have spent a little time together.” After the picnic, you drove to his house and found that his entire family had plans to meet Aria. You would have turned on the invite and returned to your house even if it weren't for My's incredible cooking ability. You did, however, dine with Bill's family. Fortunately, Aria was the center of attention, so you didn't have to answer as many questions. It was heartwarming to see how they greeted you and Aria with laughter and love.

“I know, playing dolls with you, Aria, and Alex would be hilarious. But I had to go to work,” You show him your office, including the walls and every surface covered in notes and papers. “Things aren't looking good; I might sleep here tonight.”

“Do you want me to come over and help you?”

“I won't be able to keep my hands off you if you come here, and it will only delay my work.” He gives you a dangerous smile, and you almost want to abandon everything and run to his arms.

“I want to be there more now.” You and he talk about other things for a while, and as you tell him about your recent event, you notice that he isn't paying attention to yHis gaze is fixed ahead, and his brows are furrowed deeply. You can tell he's upset about something. When you ask him what it is, all he does is shake his head and stare at the screen with doe eyes. “Y/N, we have to be honest with Aria. She got to know me and now she actually loves me. I don't want her to be confused when we tell her the truth.”

"The pedagogue agrees with you. You are completely right; we must tell her as soon as possible. But we have to find a way to tell her without upsetting her. ” You both remain silent, pondering how to proceed. You grin at the thought that occurs to you, "I have a brilliant idea. I think I know what we should do. ”

//xxx//

“It's all right, dude. If you ask me again if it is working, I will kick your balls and you will never have another child,” Bill's assistant warns him as he continues to set up the projector. His mother, father, and siblings are all waiting for you and Aria to arrive in the living room. Today is the day when you will finally tell her the truth.

Stellan pats Bill on the back as he sits next to his father,” Are you excited, son?

“Don't worry, Bill. Everything will be fine. Relax or you'll have a heart attack." Eija kisses him on the cheek, and he nods, hoping she is right. You texted him fifteen minutes ago that you're on your way to his house, which feels like an eternity to him.

"They're on the driveway, everybody except Bill upstairs," After giving Bill a hug, Valter follows the rest of the family to the stairs.

“Welcome!” Bill opens the front door and Aria is in his arms in seconds. “Aria, we have a surprise for you,” he says as he walks into the living room.

“You do?” She turns to face you, and you nod, her eyes gleaming with excitement. He places Aria on the couch, and you take a seat next to her.

“Yes, we do, baby. Bill and I both know how much you enjoy watching movies and hearing stories. That is why we made a film for you. Do you want to see it?" Aria, of course, nods in response to your question, and you look into Bill's eyes, he is sitting on an armchair next to you. He waits for you to give him the signal, and when you do, he grabs the remote and starts the video. You wink at him and kiss the top of your daughter's head; her gaze is fixed on the large screen across the room. “Now I'm going to tell you a fairy tale, baby, try to listen to me as well, okay?"

“Okay, mommy, promise.”

“There was a father who loved his daughter so much. He had to sail away one day. He had to get away from his family and their home. ” As the screen fills with images of the sea and boats, you speak.

"Like my father."

“He always wanted to go back, to be with his daughter. But unfortunately, he got lost because of the storms and winds. A long time has passed and his little girl grew older. Meanwhile, the father found a way to his daughter. But he couldn't see his daughter, whom he absolutely loved. First, he had to find a house for them to live in. Then he made a lovely room for her." The room that Bill prepared for Aria appears on the screen in slow motion. You recorded everything a few days ago so Bill could send it to his assistant to edit. Your intelligent girl immediately recognizes the bed and the toys.

"Is that Bill's house?” You look at Bill and smile at your daughter, tears welling up on your cheeks, but not from sadness; you are excited and happy for the next chapter of your lives. Aria nudges you and adds, "Tell me how the fairy tale ends, mommy."

You kiss your daughter again as the images on the screen change, saying, "Before I tell you the ending, you need to know the beginning, love. This is a story about your mother and father. Aria, they were madly in love with each other. They were happy together."

There is a photograph of you and Bill. It's from when you two first met at an old friend's birthday party. And it shifts to another picture, one from when you first started dating, with Bill wrapping his arms around you and laughing at the camera. Bill grins at the last picture of you and Bill kissing; you included it so your daughter could understand the dynamics of your relationship.

"Oh, that's Bill. Mommy, Bill is kissing you.” Aria's eyes widen as it finally hits her, and she gasps and covers her mouth with her palm. You wait for her reaction while holding your breath. She looks at Bill for a second before turning to face you, looking shy. “Is Bill my father?”

Bill's heart feels like it's about to burst out of his chest as he watches his daughter climb into your lap. He can't tell if she's happy or not. Is she disappointed? He is concerned that Aria will reject him as a father. “Yes, baby,” you say, bringing him back to reality. "Bill is your father. Would you like a happy ending, Aria?”

“Yes.” You stand up with Aria in your arms and approach Bill; he rises slowly, like a scene from a drama film. His worried eyes scan her face for any indication that Aria is unhappy.

You reach out and take his hand in yours; wanting to reassure him that everything is fine. For a split second, his gaze is locked on yours, and you give him the biggest supportive smile you've ever given. “Say hello to your father, honey. He's finally arrived.”

“Hello. Will I call you dad from now?”

“Only if you want it as well. Aria, do you want me to be your father?"

"I do. You were always with me, but I couldn't understand that you were my father."  Bill is moved to tears by her small voice, which is filled with emotion.

"My daughter, my lovely daughter..." He hesitantly extends his hand to Aria. He notices you are already in tears as he strokes her hair. He cradles Aria in his arms and hugs her tightly, as if letting go of her would cause her to disappear. Aria, on the other hand, wraps her tiny arms around his neck and snuggles. He pulls you in closer, and you rest your forehead on his other shoulder.

”Daddy.”

[bloojayoolie]

Fucking, Life, and Parents: Wants to live his life and not bothe anyone wit his sometimes confusing condition This is She wants to be special and identiries as a lians man without dysphoria She does nothing To TIy Dass Bt she ner is fine too told people to call her nehim But thai sheher is also acceplable his makes uncemforrable becomes extremely distressed when misgendereddoesn't understand 's action and talks 10 me Well.I'm not really trans yet, m parents don'1 agree with that. Once they gine me the okitiide trans Because thal's how being rans NOrKS, It's nat like it's somethin you'te born with Io Mini comic I made about a trender at my school-please don't repost reblogs are ok Text Message Saturday 151 Hey is this Yea. Who's yhis This From the GSA I just wanted to ask you Are you really trans? Not yet My parents stil don't agree with ir That's not really how you works, you know that rigit 0 Message bro this is really gross try to pass because they don't feel sale trying to. maybe dealing with intemalied transphobia and that's why thay sa she/her is fine too maybe it's none of your bursiness what denties as because acoording to this comic, you seem to be the anly one bothered and besides that, it's realy uncool to post shit about them online for the express purpose of making fun of them. don't bring down real people for tunbir discourse points Like·l: a iving person with feeings and thoughts and experiences that you have no idea about. Just take a minute and think about how you would feel if someone made art that was mac to mock you speciically and passed it around an intemet They shouldn't have to prowe themselves to you for you to treat hem with basic respect hey op why did you exposeseal fucking name you idiot a are you trying so gut im un or not trying to get involved in trans discourse be im cis but the fuck man 11 notes Feb 16h,201