#why is this so romantic. btw.

[cementcornfield]

Thank you NFLonCBS. You get me 🙏💜💛

[inkskinned]

we were sitting on the floor and i was cutting out tiny pictures to make a collage for a friend's birthday. you were on your phone and you laughed about something, and i was still in love with you then, so i asked what had you giggling.

"sorry. i was just..." you took a moment and went back to texting. "i was telling someone about how you're afraid of the dark."

i'm afraid of the dark because something bad happened. "oh." i felt a little slinky of shame crawl down my throat.

you glanced up, and maybe it showed on my face, because you rolled your eyes and held the phone to the side casually so i could see the group chat. "what? was it a secret?"

i looked down to the scissors in my hand. "i just..." no, it's not a secret. it just felt like something private, something serious. saying why would you tell someone that just feels like an accusation. it's unfair. i honestly am not even ashamed of it, it's just a fact about my person that i don't usually share.

what a strange experience. is this a human thing or a generational thing? for our grandparents: did they need to worry about how quickly someone can just... share your personal information? again, i didn't even really have a true objection. what could i say? i want any person in my life to feel they can be honest with their friends. it's not like i said don't tell anyone this.

i cut out another letter to complete the rainbow happy birthday, started hunting for the exclamation mark. i heard you sigh dramatically.

"don't make a big deal about this," you said.

this entire conversation was a pattern for us, and this was when we got to my least favorite part of the pattern. i would get my feelings hurt in some oblique not-technically-terrible way, and then it would be making a big deal about something. you'd get frustrated for me for being soft, but i was born soft. you knew i was soft when you pierced me. it's one of the things that made controlling me so easy.

"i'm not," i felt my voice crack. the question came without my wanting. "why are you guys talking about me?" and why are you saying that thing? why not like - i'm telling them how you're generous and kind and pretty.

you let out this low, tragic groan. "oh my god." you tossed the phone away from your body. "there, see? i just won't talk to them if you don't like it."

the rest of the hour went the way it always went, between us: i said i don't actually mind if you talk to your friends but -, you found a way to call my minor expression of discomfort "being dramatic." you got upset that i had been offended. i ended up apologizing, even though i hadn't actually done anything.

afterwards, you picked up the phone again. after texting for a little bit, you snorted. "okay," you said, "but it is kind of funny you're afraid of the dark. i mean, when you think about it."

[afterthelambs]

⚠️Spoilers for Look Back but I was initially confused about what Fujino and Kyomoto's relationship had to do with pursuing a career as a mangaka. After thinking about it, I interpret it as a narrative device to represent what will come when choosing to pursue art (of any form, whether it's comics, painting, animation, music, etc.).

Think about it, what's Kyomoto's role in the story? She is what got Fujino to take art seriously in middle school, and what motivated her to continue after she initially gave up. However, she's also the only thing in the story that makes Fujino wish she quit art. First, halfway through 6th grade and then later after her death. She serves as Fujino's motivator and de-motivator.

I think the scene of Fujino wishing that she never told Kyomoto to come out (that pursuing art only led to suffering) represents artists' regrets. We literally look back and see an alternate universe where Fujino never pursued art and it has a happier ending. Anyone that pursues artistic dreams will end up regretting it at some point. It's not easy, any artist will tell you that. The story is saying yes, you probably will end up healthier and more stable by giving up your dreams. Because art is suffering.

But then Fujino enters Kyomoto's room after reading the comic from the alternate reality and all of a sudden we get a montage of the happy memories and accomplishments they had pursuing their dreams together. And we realize that, everything we saw of them in the alternate 'happier' reality pales in comparison to this:

The happiest both of them look in that alternate world is when they finally meet and promise to work together someday. They loved art. They loved each other. Giving up on your dreams means missing out on all of that, and nothing in the world can replace it. Because yes art is suffering, but art is also joy and love.

And so the end of the story where Fujino goes back to work isn't her moving on. She tapes the comic strip in front of her to remind her of Kyomoto, to remind her of why she got into comics in the first place. Basically, Kyomoto IS art to Fujino. A life with her means experiencing both suffering and joy, while the life without her means having none of that.

I might be wrong about this, like maybe Fujimoto just wanted to tell a mangaka story with doomed yuri (valid) HOWEVER i like my interpretation so im sticking with it.

[bleeding-seraphic]

Too much of their ship art is out of character. Mordecai is a paranoid asexual and Rocky is insane there’s no way it could start in any way less chaotic than this

[somewhereincairparavel]

No thoughts.

Just thinking about how Reyna kept her distance from Jason because of Venus, fearing heartbreak, but ended up getting heartbroken anyway.

Just thinking about how Jason felt guilty about Reyna's feelings for him, thinking that he led her on, and felt truly sorry that he didn't love her back.

Just thinking about how bitter Reyna sounded when she said that Jason was no longer fully roman anymore.

Just thinking about how, upon seeing Thalia's eyes, the only thing Reyna can think of is Jason's startling blue stare.

Just thinking about how Jason could tell that Reyna was tired simply by noting how her shoulders move.

Just thinking about how Reyna rarely compliments anyone, but fondly calls Jason an "all American boy".

Just thinking about how Jason would never bet against Reyna under any circumstances, and knows if anyone is capable of completing dangerous missions, it's Reyna.

Just thinking about how Reyna daydreamt of her and Jason holding hands, walking in the garden.

Just thinking about how Reyna and Jason would geek over their shared interest of roman history.

Just thinking about how Jason HATES unkept promises, yet the only unkept promise he'd unintentionally made was that if he and Reyna would go visit Diocletian's sceptre, it would only be them visiting TOGETHER. Not seperately. The fates ruined his chance of keeping that promise.

Just thinking about how Reyna would've felt upon hearing that her once best friend, died tragically saving a god, and that she would never see him again.

Just thinking about how Jason dies with the guilt of not properly reconciling with his old friend.

Just thinking about how Reyna lives with the guilt of keeping her distance from him because of that wretched warning Venus gave her. Maybe if she had not, would they have been together? Would they have atleast remained best friends? Would they have not grown apart?

Just thinking about how Reyna looked like she'd been crying for hours during Jason's funeral.

Just thinking about how they both knew their friendship would never be the same again but refused to confront that bitter reality, so they ran away from it.

Just thinking about how they never even shared one last hug together.

Just thinking about how in the end, both of them most likely only had bittersweet memories of eachother, and that neither of them got to say their final goodbyes.

No thoughts, just the tragic end of Jason Grace and Reyna Avila Ramirez's friendship

[has-bad-ideas-constantly]

Celestia on her public account ( her personal is reserved for her fandoms, to ego surf, and to be an online pathetic gothic queen)

[beanghostprincess]

I will forever love seeing Luffy and Nami holding Zoro's swords. He's so protective of those three but it's not even because he fears something might happen to them, but because he's scared something might happen to the crew and himself if he doesn't have them with him. They're like extra limbs. The ones he uses to fight and protect and breathe. He feels uneasy whenever his swords aren't around him, and that is just a fact. You can't deny that he feels comfort in having them by his side at all times, knowing that he'll be able to protect the crew from any dangers. They're tied to his heart and soul in a way that if he loses sight of them he might actually lose himself too. So he does not enjoy seeing his swords in somebody else's hands. They can disappear, he will find them. They can run away, he will follow. They can break, he trusts them not to but if they do, he will keep going carrying their bond with him still. But he doesn't like seeing them in somebody else's hands because those are his swords. His limbs. His heart. His soul. It's just not right. It never feels right. But.

But.

But sometimes Luffy acts like he knows what he's doing and actually asks for permission instead of just taking what he wants. As if crossing Zoro's boundaries would be unforgivable, when he knows Zoro would give him anything he wanted to take from him. But he asks. He asks, with a careful, polite, deep voice Zoro isn't used to hearing. But it always ends with the softest of smiles and the petition reaches a place inside of Zoro's heart that he just knows has also touched his swords. So he lets him, because how could he not, and he runs his fingers through all of them. Amazed. Astonished. Respectfully talking to them as if they could hear him. And they can. Zoro knows they hear and feel and love and crave and long for his captain's touch. He knows, because he does too. Because who wouldn't? Luffy holds them in a way he never holds anything else- Carefully. Like they aren't his. Like befriending somebody he fears might reject him. Like taking hold of Zoro's heart and holding him so gently in case he might break him. He worships them as if he weren't the god in this relationship. He looks handsome, too. Not pretty. Not cute. Handsome. Mature. His hat covers his adventurous gaze but leaves his mischievous grin for the whole world to see. And yet, the swordsman trusts him enough. Without any look or any word. He knows Luffy's face by heart, he realizes, now that he can picture his eyes quite too perfectly under his hat. His skin glistens under the sun and his tender fingers hold the sword with so much clumsiness it looks dumb. He doesn't know how to hold them, yet they don't want to move away from him. It's clumsy but it takes over them. Maybe it's his haki. Maybe it's the effect the future king of the pirates has. Zoro thinks it's just him. Luffy. And his heart stops the second Luffy smiles, as if he had just heard the sword respond to him. He wants to kiss him. Bite him. Let him bite back and draw blood and eat him. Let him hold him the way he holds the swords but tighter. Closer. Maybe he's in love. Zoro. With Luffy. It's not a maybe. Who is he trying to trick? He knows he is in love. With the way he smiles and the way he holds and the way he wants but respects and loves. It's funny like that, the fact that Luffy keeps being so careful when Zoro would let him tear his heart apart and eat it if he so desired. It's funny that the swords love him with such gentleness when they often demand power. Perhaps kindness is the most powerful weapon of all or, at least, Luffy's most powerful skill. Zoro hates it when somebody else holds them because they don't own them. They don't own him. He doesn't even own his swords, anyway. Nobody can. They're his the same way he's theirs, just with a bit more dominance and respect. But Luffy isn't owning them. He's praying to them. Talking to them. Befriending them. Loving them. And they would bow to him if he so desired. Zoro knows they would, as fierce as they are and violent as they seem and as sharp as they cut. They'd bow to him because Zoro would too. The uneasiness does not exist when Luffy is the one to hold them because, if Zoro had to give out his soul for somebody to take care of, that would be Luffy. And if he has to be unprotected. Naked. Bare in front of a thousand soldiers. He will if it's Luffy the one fighting instead.

Sometimes Nami wants to hold them just to feel what it's like to be in Zoro's shoes. It's a stupid reason. He refuses to let her do it as an instinctive reaction at first. She doesn't seem as interested in following the protocol as Luffy is, but she knows where to stop and she knows what to say to get on Zoro's nerves, anyway. She's equally as fierce. Equally as sharp. He won't let her hold any cursed sword, but it's not like she wants to. She's smarter than that. Careful and respectful but not that interested in the swords and what they mean, more in how they feel. Zoro gets it. Kind of. Somehow. She says something about always letting them eat her precious tangerines, so he should humor her by letting her hold Wado at least. She isn't pushing him. He knows she wouldn't. She's just teasing because she knows. She always knows. She knows he will say yes. Because he always does what she says, although he keeps demanding a bit of respect to not be treated like a dog. But Nami never forces him to do anything. He could refuse. She would give up at some point. But there's just something about her- Stubbornness. Strength. Love. So much love and care and worry and anger. And Zoro likes her. She's selfish, too, like a pirate should be. Stronger than Zoro in the ways that matter. Smarter, too, even if he wouldn't admit it out loud. But she leads the way and he follows, not because that's a dog's job, but because he wants to. He trusts her. Something he never thought he would. But he does. She's smart. She leads the way. She knows where they're going. They somehow are the same and totally different at the same time. Zoro grounds Luffy when he gets lost. Nami leads them both so they won't. So there's something about her curiosity that makes him soften. He never knows exactly why he does what she says. Why he indulges her like that. But it's satisfying, for some reason he refuses to read within himself, the satisfactory and pleased grin on her face when he hands her Wado. She's careful with her. Awful at holding her. Bad posture. Great smile. Horrible movements. Beautiful eyes. It's okay, though, he thinks. Wado likes her because Zoro likes her. Nami loses interest within a minute, complaining about the weight and the sudden realization of "you always have this thing in your mouth" which makes her want to give her back. But she stares at her for a whole minute. It isn't her thing, but her eyes spark when the sword is returned to Zoro. Trust. A smile. Thankfulness. Her bangs are getting a bit longer and one strand of hair gets in the middle of her teasing smirk. She says she prefers her clima-tact, but swords are fine, "I guess". "She's pretty" she says. Zoro thinks she is pretty. Nami. In a way he can't quite describe because he has never really been good at that. But she is. Like a blade. Sharp. But in the right hands this time for her not to cut the ones she loves anymore. She hands him a tangerine next, every time he lets her hold his sword. An exchange. "I give you something that matters. You give me something that matters". Zoro wants to say it's not the same, but the tangerine is sweet. Juicy. His fingers then smell strongly of citrus. Almost as similar as steel. If he can feel Nami's heartbeat in every bite, he wonders if she has been able to hear his in the hilt of his sword. Calm. Peaceful. Safe.

Zoro doesn't like seeing his swords in somebody else's hands because those are his swords. His limbs. His heart. His soul. It's just not right. It never feels right. But.

But sometimes it does.

[ninoochat]

We've never actually been on a real date. Bullshit.

[nonbinarylesbianherb]

ppl who are like "have you ever experienced a close female friendship" to try deny rhaenicent like.. yes bitch i have!!! and thats *exactly* why i can tell theres MORE than just "close friendship" between these two gay bitches!!

[sieglinde-freud]

let it be known that i love prince inigo with my whole soul. however sometimes it is SO much fun to think about owain and his two most loyal-est knights you ever seen: worst guy in the world #1 and worst guy in the world #2. i love retainer inigo and severa so much. retainers who bully you and make fun of you and trash on you but they’d leave behind everyone and everything they ever knew to follow you and protect you in a whole new universe. they love you so much that they’d swear allegiance to total strangers but that loyalty pales in comparison to what they’d do for you. and they were all lovers!!!!!!!

[mvrdermeharder]

Kaiser-goal analysis part 1:

Okay this has been on my mind for a while and I want to get it out real quick

it wasn’t quick, i’m still editing this TWO DAYS LATER

[This is not the analysis I’ve said I wanted to write about Kaiser’s fucked up relationships, I still didn’t get started on that… But I’ll tag you @fyeahkainess since this “little” summary of Kaiser’s goals has a lot to do w kainess, so I thought it might interest you anyways…]

So, most of the goal celebrations in bllk include players giving each other physical affection, or getting close to one another.

And I guess there’s Rin’s latest goal, which is a kinda-nuts-but-still-strangely-endearing moment where he unintentionally bonds with the other crazies of pxg.

But we also have some strikers who did not get a so called “cute celebratory moment” after their goal: Noa against Barcha, Kunigami against Barcha and Manshine, Chigiri against BM

HOWEVER

These players have only scored once or twice

(Ik chigiri scored against manshine and ubers too, but we did not see the what kind of celebration happened after it)

So then we have Kaiser, who scored one goal in every game, each getting more and more impressive from a technical and difficulty standpoint, and yet… there’s less and less directly affirmative celebration going on after each one

So I’ll try to make sense of that if I can…

First goal:

Everything goes according to Kaiser’s plan,

Ness is the one who assists,

Kaiser is very satisfied with the goal,

The pose oozes confidence, there is an ominous, untouchable quality about it (the strong shading and artistic composition of the panel also helps), it’s hard to imagine anyone trying to approach him for a hug or something

Others admire/acknowledge his talent from afar (Isagi’s and Noa’s comments have the most weight, but other players are in awe as well)

And what we see afterwards is Kaiser getting a high five from Ness -> quick and brief physical contact, which based on Kaiser’s facial expression, only seems like an indulgence to let Ness have something.

Still, Kaiser lets him close, and keeps his body turned towards him in an open, relaxed position. And I would really like to highlight it: Ness is the only one he lets close, even if the other BM players actually contributed to the goal as well (I’ll elaborate on this later)

Second goal:

Everything goes according to Kaiser’s plan,

Ness assists,

Kaiser is satisfied with the goal,

The pose - while still full of confidence and satisfaction - is much less intimidating. I could actually imagine other players getting close to celebrate, he seems far less unapproachable here. It’s the goal itself that gives him that untouchable vibe instead of the pose.

Which is why still, other players acknowledge his skills only from a distance.

Although a high five or other physical contact is absent this time, Kaiser keeps facing Ness and even approaches him. This greatly contrasts with how he keeps his back to Isagi, only turning to him in a cocky manner to tease and belittle.

And it all makes sense: in ch 243 Kaiser says how his goal is “to send all the worlds soccer players to the depths of despair” in ch 261 he expresses that he doesn’t know how to receive kindness, it’s easier to be a target of malice, and that he enjoys being an untouchable impossibility that brings despair.

So of course he doesn’t celebrate his goals with other players. Instead, seeing their shocked face and broken spirit is the celebration itself. That is the reason why he’s so weirded out by Isagi being all fired up instead of hopeless. It’s uncomfortable for Kaiser, who is still on his high from the goal and the reaction it evokes. It’s like a slap in the face that drops him from his happiest state.

He later expresses how Isagi’s behavior when faced with the impossible is not normal in ch 207. We see how it bothers him greatly as it goes against everything that he exists for. So he starts fixating on Isagi even more in the next match, to crush him as to finally feel satisfied and get affirmation for himself. Because seeing others broken after his victory is the only thing making him feel human, it’s the only thing that makes him feel good for once, so obviously, he needs to see Isagi fall in line. In the next game however…

Third goal:

Isagi is the one who starts the play, Kaiser simply steals the ball -> he doesn’t have control over the plans and playmaking,

Ness does not contribute,

Kaiser hates that the only possibility for his goal had to start with Isagi’s plans, it goes against his own esteemed self worth, thus he’s not proud of it at all.

After his goal, we see him obviously pissed off but still holding it together if only barely: his expressions and eyes are mostly covered by his hair, but when we see them they are nothing but furious and frustrated.

While other players are shocked by the impossible goal and acknowledge it - again, from a distance - Kaiser does not take satisfaction from it.

So what we see afterwards is a Kaiser who is doing his best to mask his frustration, with the only one daring to approach being an overjoyed Ness. And well, from Ness’ viewpoint, so far he has has received “affection” when Kaiser is on a high from an incredible goal, and this one was the most impressive and difficult one yet, so obviously they could celebrate this together right? Maybe in a way that lets him even closer to Kaiser?

In ch 243 he says “at some point his dream became mine”, but I think there is much more to this… In my opinion he’s just as exited about seeing Kaiser happier than ever and possibly being allowed to be close to him, as he’s exited about the goal itself. Because remember, we have NEVER seen Ness initiate physical contact. Kaiser is the one does, but only rarely: when he’s feeling the most assured in his existence = after scoring a mind-blowing goal that Ness’ pass sets him up to. (More on all of this later in the post…)

But unlike before, Kaiser does not face him after the goal, he keeps his back to him, and then viciously snaps as he can’t bear Ness voicing out (what he himself considers) as failure.

There is a sharp 180 in Kaiser’s behavior that’s obvious: he does not want to face Ness, only does so to reprimand him, and when he’s done with that (the circled panel above) he immediately turns away from him to face Isagi instead

After he declared how much he needs to see Isagi lose to him, this newest goal only contributed to the opposite of that. So now he feels even worse, needs to bury Isagi and the threat he poses to his existence even more urgently. This takes up all of his attention and focus.

And imo he does not bother to reward Ness with attention for another additional reason: Ness did not assist or contribute to the play. Kaiser only keeps him close so that he could have someone to pass to him and create a path to score. It’s very likely he’s INTENTIONALLY giving the most affection to Ness only after scoring with his help. Essentially love bombing him to encourage Ness’ cravings for making a goal possible, so that he could get to see Kaiser at his happiest, at his most open-to-affection-state. Which all benefits Kaiser.

(Alright I’m sorry, I swear I will post the continuation tomorrow, but this is already so long, and i’m still not finished w putting my thoughts together regarding the fourth goal… Because boy oh boy there are even more stuff to analyze with the Magnus goal…

So rn I’m posting this as a part 1, as I just can’t bear to have it in my drafts any longer)

Edit! Read part 2 here, and part 3 here.

[writermask-0807]

king baldwin iv x reader {“flowers of my love.”}

thinking about king baldwin iv again, and i have a personal (and also probably extremely ooc (pLEASE DONT COME FOR ME)) headcannon that he’s the type to gift you flowers;

dahlias and roses and stocks and orchids, camellias and amaryllis-es and hydeangeas and tulips, carnations and sunflowers and daisies.

his growing illness confines him to his chambers far too often, and, left alone in an aching solitude that baldwin thinks he should be used to now, he’ll read. and it’s through this - books upon books, pages upon pages, words upon words of so, so many stories he’ll never get to live through - that he discovers the language of flowers.

flowers for sadness, for fear, for anger, for hurt, for love- flowers for a whole language of feelings he doesn’t dare to confess to you.

so instead he leaves them in your chambers, the delicate things, (little confessions on their own) in silk cloth bouquets and pretty-necked vases, in twine-bound bunches and satin soft ribbons, never daring to give them to you in person.

(but, unbeknownst to him, you lovingly press them all.)

[chotachica]

I wasnt the only one who immediately thought and accepted too absurdly fast that Riri had just fucking killed that stalker girl right

[eggie0]

reinsuba ft. that april fools version

what I had in envisioned in mind:

[fluffypotatey]

To be honest I am a huge Nalu shipper. But the thing is I want to know the difference between the way Natsu cares about his guildmates and Lucy. Like what is the obvious difference since that boy sees every as Nakama so how can we say that the wag he cares about Lucy is different?

Like even when Erza passed away? (All the way back in first season there was a segment where the guild was gathered at her grave and all) Natsu was still very reactive. Plus he was also said to be depressed even when Lisanna passed.

What's the difference between all of them and Lucy?

the fact that he stayed. the fact that before he met Lucy, Natsu wasn't one to stay in a group or even want to work with anyone besides Happy at the start of the story. hell, he was ready to just file Lucy down as "New Guildmate" once they reached Fairy Tail

but then, Lucy doesn't leave. she follows him on his mission to save Macao despite her not needing to or even really understanding everything about it. she stays and then fights with him and saves him. it's no secret that Natsu is strong and can take care of himself really well. he's been going on solo missions for years now, and no one has really stopped him, but that means he's been in a lot of sticky situations where he and Happy are on their own and have no backup. and yet, without asking, Lucy offers it

and i think this is the moment when Natsu considers that maybe it's okay to have someone there to have his back (sans Happy)

"but Natsu only needed Lucy for the next quest because of the requirements," well, Natsu also wouldn't have taken or even considered that quest if it weren't for Lucy, yeah? he was not a team player (in the picking job's sense) or really wanted other people to help him on his quests sans Happy. and then he goes and picks a job that caters to their team whilst ensuring that Lucy can't say no

or maybe i'm reading too much into it 🤷🏻‍♀️

or maybe Natsu's got horrible abandonment issues that he will latch onto people so fast (Igneel & Lisanna) but also cause him to distance himself so far when left behind (his 1st time at the guild, Lisanna's death). Erza and Gray are Natsu's closet friends after Lisanna and yet they cannot reach him when he closes himself off. and then we have Lucy, who stuck by and had his back, so who is to say Natsu didn't make some contingencies to ensure whether or not she'd join him?

but maybe it's the rose, colored ship glasses i have on

because yeah, Natsu cares for all of his guildmates. the power of friendship is his biggest motivator. when we meet Natsu, our first introductions of him is defending his guild's reputation from Bora (who was using it as a guise for human trafficking) and saving Macao. and our 1st big arc (Galuna Island), where Natsu adamantly refuses to allow Gray to use Ice Shell and sacrifice himself despite how antagonistic they've been to each other. we get Natsu 100% at Erza's defense throughout the Tower of Heaven and he is even ready to defend Wendy though they only met hours ago

Natsu is a character with a bleeding heart and cannot help but wear it on his sleeve, but we don't really see him allow others to fight his battles or have his back until Lucy comes in. to be honest, i don't even think he had his heart on his sleeve until Lucy. he still has a bleeding heart (i don't think anything could stop that), but he was not ready to be open in receiving company because he was so used to it being ripped away from him

that being said: of all the characters he interacts with, he finds Lucy to be someone compatible enough for him to start going on team missions and inviting her on them (for example, his 1st S-class mission, which he stole, he went to her house to show it to her. the fact that part of the reward was a celestial key might be a coincidence, but i wouldn't doubt it as Natsu and Happy's trump card in case she refused)

but yeah, the difference is that he stayed and didn't push her away at the beginning, but instead continued to invite her along with him to the point that doing a mission without Lucy wasn't his regular anymore. compared to the rest of the guild, of whom he spent most of his childhood with, even if he spoke to no one, they would still be around and talk to him anyway. he might not invite them on job and only challenge them to fights, but the guild is his home and a constant in his life, a constant he needs (bc heavy abandonment issues).

"okay, but he still pushed her away after he watched Igneel die right in front of him. and he left the guild for a whole year, too. so what's the difference there?" you may ask.

so 1) Natsu never thought the guild would disband. he returns to Fiore after a year and is the last to know that they disbanded. he assumed, like all the other times before and while he and others were sealed for 7 years, that Fairy Tail would still be there when he returned. he assumed that his disappearance would not impact so hard because the guild would still be around and Lucy would have the others with her

which, did not happen :)

and like, so many guild members go off on jobs, quests, or even just leave for an indiscriminate amount of time (which i, personally, believe was his rationality for leaving), so him being gone for a year was nothing! right? no harm, eh? his plan was never to be gone forever :))))

2) he just watched his father die and lose any chance of having some semblance of a long term reunion with Igneel. he literally lost one of his main driving motivations for getting stronger and taking jobs. before Fairy Tail, before anyone, it was Igneel. and to learn that a) Igneel was always with him to begin with and b) he only got to see him for less than a day after 14 years of nothing......i would feel lost too ngl

man's needed space from everybody. and he also needed comfort, but Natsu has been shown not to really be the character who asks to receive comfort (and when he does receive it, it's usually when he's already emotionally compromised). he is in the habit of shutting people out after being abandoned or losing someone close to him, with his next rationale being to "get stronger" in order to prevent what happened in the past to ever happen in the future.

anyway

what makes this different? well for one, he sent the letter only to Lucy (or it's implied since no one else is shown getting one) because of how the two spend most of their time together. even the line that goes with the panel makes it sound like Natsu is unsure on how the note will be received (maybe even hesitant? but that could be my own hopes)

and one of the 1st people he reunites with after a year is Lucy and we get such a similar parallel to the first chapter of Fairy Tail between the two as if the narrative itself is slotting them together to say "ah yes, now everything is back to normal and new journeys can begin"

but yeah, this is just a long way of saying, that Natsu does love his friends and guildmates but even when he is close to them, he kept to himself (and Happy) and sort of stayed in their orbit but always with some emotional distance because of his fear of abandonment. and then you have Lucy where he will stay for and allow her to orbit around him and he will invite to new adventures no questions asked

that's the difference

[karasuneko]

GODDDDDD IDK WHAT CAME OVER ME BUT I'M SUDDENLY INTO RINSAGI????!? IT'S LIKE SOMETHING CLICKED IN PLACE AND NEXT THING I KNOW I'M READING DOUJINS AND IM GOING CRAZY RAAAAHSJDHKF

?+&#!£-#&/)@:"!"

OH???? FREAKS.

LAWWWWD I'VE BEEN POSSESSED BY THE YAOI GODS ONCE AGAIN