#and then i searched up the panels to compare

[mvrdermeharder]

Okay this has been on my mind for a while and I want to get it out real quick

it wasn’t quick, i’m still editing this TWO DAYS LATER

[This is not the analysis I’ve said I wanted to write about Kaiser’s fucked up relationships, I still didn’t get started on that… But I’ll tag you @fyeahkainess since this “little” summary of Kaiser’s goals has a lot to do w kainess, so I thought it might interest you anyways…]

So, most of the goal celebrations in bllk include players giving each other physical affection, or getting close to each other.

And I guess there’s Rin’s latest goal, which is a kinda-nuts-but-still-strangely-endearing moment where he unintentionally bonds with the other crazies of pxg.

But we also have some strikers who did not get a so called “cute celebratory moment” after their goal: Noa against Barcha, Kunigami against Barcha and Manshine, Chigiri against BM

HOWEVER

These players have only scored once or twice

(Ik chigiri scored against manshine and ubers too, but we did not see the what kind of celebration happened after it)

So then we have Kaiser, who scored one goal in every game, each getting more and more impressive from a technical and difficulty standpoint, and yet… there’s less and less directly affirmative celebration going on after each one

So I’ll try to make sense of that if I can…

First goal:

Everything goes according to Kaiser’s plan,

Ness is the one who assists,

Kaiser is very satisfied with the goal,

The pose oozes confidence, there is an ominous, untouchable quality about it (the strong shading and artistic composition of the panel also helps), it’s hard to imagine anyone trying to approach him for a hug or something

Others admire/acknowledge his talent from afar (Isagi’s and Noa’s comments have the most weight, but other players are in awe as well)

And what we see afterwards is Kaiser getting a high five from Ness -> quick and brief physical contact, which based on Kaiser’s facial expression, only seems like an indulgence to let Ness have something.

Still, Kaiser lets him close, and keeps his body turned towards him in an open, relaxed position. And I would really like to highlight it: Ness is the only one he lets close, even if the other BM players actually contributed to the goal as well (I’ll elaborate on this later)

Second goal:

Everything goes according to Kaiser’s plan,

Ness assists,

Kaiser is satisfied with the goal,

The pose - while still full of confidence and satisfaction - is much less intimidating. I could actually imagine other players getting close to celebrate, he seems far less unapproachable here. It’s the goal itself that gives him that untouchable vibe instead of the pose.

Which is why still, other players acknowledge his skills only from a distance.

Although a high five or other physical contact is absent this time, Kaiser keeps facing Ness and even approaches him. This greatly contrasts with how he keeps his back to Isagi, only turning to him in a cocky manner to tease and belittle.

And it all makes sense: in ch 243 Kaiser says how his goal is “to send all the worlds soccer players to the depths of despair” in ch 261 he expresses that he doesn’t know how to receive kindness, it’s easier to be a target of malice, and that he enjoys being an untouchable impossibility that brings despair.

So of course he doesn’t celebrate his goals with other players. Instead, seeing their shocked face and broken spirit is the celebration itself. That is the reason why he’s so weirded out by Isagi being all fired up instead of hopeless. It’s uncomfortable for Kaiser, who is still on his high from the goal and the reaction it evokes. It’s like a slap in the face that drops him from his happiest state.

He later expresses how Isagi’s behavior when faced with the impossible is not normal in ch 207. We see how it bothers him greatly as it goes against everything that he exists for. So he starts fixating on Isagi even more in the next match, to crush him as to finally feel satisfied and get affirmation for himself. Because seeing others broken after his victory is the only thing making him feel human, it’s the only thing that makes him feel good for once, so obviously, he needs to see Isagi fall in line. In the next game however…

Third goal:

Isagi is the one who starts the play, Kaiser simply steals the ball -> he doesn’t have control over the plans and playmaking,

Ness does not contribute,

Kaiser hates that the only possibility for his goal had to start with Isagi’s plans, it goes against his own esteemed self worth, thus he’s not proud of it at all.

After his goal, we see him obviously pissed off but still holding it together if only barely: his expressions and eyes are mostly covered by his hair, but when we see them they are nothing but furious and frustrated.

While other players are shocked by the impossible goal and acknowledge it - again, from a distance - Kaiser does not take satisfaction from it.

So what we see afterwards is a Kaiser who is doing his best to mask his frustration, with the only one daring to approach being an overjoyed Ness. And well, from Ness’ viewpoint, so far he has has received “affection” when Kaiser is on a high from an incredible goal, and this one was the most impressive and difficult one yet, so obviously they could celebrate this together right? Maybe in a way that lets him even closer to Kaiser?

In ch 243 he says “at some point his dream became mine”, but I think there is much more to this… In my opinion he’s just as exited about seeing Kaiser happier than ever and possibly being allowed to be close to him, as he’s exited about the goal itself. Because remember, we have NEVER seen Ness initiate physical contact. Kaiser is the one does, but only rarely: when he’s feeling the most assured in his existence = after scoring a mind-blowing goal that Ness’ pass sets him up to. (More on all of this later in the post…)

But unlike before, Kaiser does not face him after the goal, he keeps his back to him, and then viciously snaps as he can’t bear Ness voicing out (what he himself considers) as failure.

There is a sharp 180 in Kaiser’s behavior that’s obvious: he does not want to face Ness, only does so to reprimand him, and when he’s done with that (the circled panel above) he immediately turns away from him to face Isagi instead

After he declared how much he needs to see Isagi lose to him, this newest goal only contributed to the opposite of that. So now he feels even worse, needs to bury Isagi and the threat he poses to his existence even more urgently. This takes up all of his attention and focus.

And imo he does not bother to reward Ness with attention for another additional reason: Ness did not assist or contribute to the play. Kaiser only keeps him close so that he could have someone to pass to him and create a path to score. It’s very likely he’s INTENTIONALLY giving the most affection to Ness only after scoring with his help. Essentially love bombing him to encourage Ness’ cravings for making a goal possible, so that he could get to see Kaiser at his happiest, at his most open-to-affection-state. Which all benefits Kaiser.

(Alright I’m sorry, I swear I will post the continuation tomorrow, but this is already so long, and i’m still not finished w putting my thoughts together regarding the fourth goal… Because boy oh boy there are even more stuff to analyze with the Magnus goal…

So rn I’m posting this as a part 1, as I just can’t bear to have it in my drafts any longer)

[dunmeshistash]

So basically, I went on a search for images of Laios, Marcille, and Falin and what i found is.....

The closer we get to the end of the manga, Marcille gets shorter??? I Think??? BUT she's very often depicted as being half a head shorter than Laios to make the spacing in panels more pleasing! In depictions of Marcille and the siblings, we get the little stair steps.

Granted, this is them sitting. It's not exactly even. I think Laios might be on a chair and Falin and Marcille are on the bed? AGAIN though, in most Laios and Marcille panels, she's half a head shorter than Laios

And also

And also

... guess what

GUESS WHOS ALSO HALF A HEAD TALLER THAN MARCILLE

Basically. I'm using this as my excuse for thinking Falin and Laios are basically the same height. Getting a character's height exactly right across hundreds of drawings isn't actually that important, making sure they stay relative to eachother is. Is Marcille is too tall in almost all the panels she's next to Laios? a head is around 20 cm tall, and Laios is 25 cm taller than her! I thought it might be the case but... Falin IS half a head taller than Marcille. 10 cm. So Maybe... maybe.....

Laios is too short in all of his panels. Marcille is the right height, its Laios. Look. Tade is 195 cm tall. She's 10 cm (the magic half a head) taller than Laios. and she's a head and a half taller than Marcille!! Laios' height is wrong!

Until the end of the manga when they stretch my boy out. Marcille's head comes to his chin, not his eyes or nose.

LAIOS IS SUPPOSED TO BE THIS TALL. HE'S A BIG GUY

Though this might be even too big?? Anyways. Thank you for letting me rant.

Let me say. It's really hard to find a picture of Marcille and Falin standing side by side. They're almost always hugging, or cuddling, or Marcille is leaning a lot into her, or they're bathing together, or laying on a bed. STAND UP STRAIGHT SO I CAN COMPARE HEIGHTS

The sizes of all the characters are elastic. They can shrink or swell to make a point for a panel, it can be a stylistic choice to make Izutsumi and Marcille the same size when they're getting along and it makes narrative sense to make Marcille taller when she's mothering her. There's a reason the character designs are so loved in the manga.

I respect the energy, it reminded me of this college humor sketch

Yeah it's probably for framing that they get so close together in height in most panels, sometimes it gets awkward to draw characters in their correct height so you end up going with what "feels right"? Plus the effects for storytelling like you mentioned

Here's the gang in this height chart again and yeah, Marcille is supposed to be whole head shorter than Laios, maybe he's was always squatting?

[theresattrpgforthat]

How To Find Cool Games: On DriveThruRPG!

So disclaimer upfront: I don’t use the DriveThruRPG website nearly as much as Itch.io. Some of those reasons are practical (there’s no tagging system, the catalogue is rather D&D saturated,), while others are more… well, shallow (the website isn’t as pretty).

However, DriveThruRPG is a very good tool to have in your toolbox when it comes to finding cool ttrpgs, for a number of reasons, the primary one being that it’s for TTRPGS and only TTRPGs! Let’s get started.

The Search Bar / Categories.

You can start by doing a basic search for a game that you already know about, or by searching for a keyword, like “pirates” or “zombies”. You’ll get titles sorted by “relevance”, so things that have the keyword in the name will show up first. One of the biggest downsides of this strategy is that everything kind of gets lumped in here: supplements, maps, expansions, adventures, character sheets… the list goes on. However, you can narrow down what you’re looking for by using the toggles at the top of the website. I personally usually narrow down search results by selecting “Product Type” and then “Core Rulebooks”.

One nice thing DriveThru has compared to Itch.io is that you can combine categories, so if I wanted to brows say, Gothic Horror Core Rulebooks priced under $20, well I can do that! My favourite categories are for genre, but another set of categories that you may find very useful once you’ve familiarized yourself with some games is the Rule System category. There are categories for systems like the Year Zero Engine, Forged in the Dark, BRP (Basic Roleplaying), OSR, and so much more. There’s also “other systems” and “any system” categories if you want to find something that’s unique or that can be used across games.

DriveThru also has a lot of games published in different languages, and you can narrow your results to see what’s been offered in your language. I think there are more options on this website than there are on Itch, although you might benefit by finding one or two publishers in your language on DriveThru, and then check the publisher’s website from there.

The Homepage

Another reason to check out DriveThru regularly is the sales and promotions. The top banner of the homepage will typically advertise a few things: the Deal of the Day, current themed sales, and special offers that DriveThru RPG wants you to know about. Their homepage also has Bestselling Titles, Most Popular Games Under $5, Newest Games, Featured Titles, and, if you scroll down enough, Personalized suggestions. Unlike Itch.io, DriveThru does a lot of work to show you what’s new, what’s hot, and what’s a really good deal right now, which can all be really helpful things!

When you land on a game, you’ll be able to see whether or not DriveThru sells physical copies, some basic information like book size, rule system, publisher & author, and a blurb describing the setting and other general information about the game. DriveThru has a side panel with “Customers also Bought”, which is great for showing you things that you might like, either because they surround the same theme, they work for the same game, or they are in a similar genre. (Another thing that Itch isn’t quite as good at.)

You’ll also be able to see (and leave) reviews for game, including the ratings left by other people who have picked it up. Occasionally I’ll find really useful information in the reviews, as reviewers might talk about mechanics they love or loathe, or recommend styles of play that they feel the game matches.

Finally, like Itch, DriveThru will let you know if you’ve already bought the game, and provide you with a download shortcut.

Publishing House Pages

Larger publishing houses typically have their ttrpg content sorted very nicely for you on their publisher pages, to help you find the things that you want. Modiphius is a great example, sorting Star Trek, Dune, Fallout, and their 2d20 games all in special categories.

Many publishers also have a Community Content section, which is great if you’re looking for assets, new adventures, hacks of a game system and some very reasonably priced (or even cheap) game additions. Similar to Itch, DriveThru has a Pay-What-You-Want feature for many games, although, unlike Itch, most PWYW titles require that you pay a non-zero amount.

Newsletters

When you create an account on DriveThruRPG, you can sign up for various different kinds of newsletters. Some come directly from DriveThru itself: this includes the Follow Your Favourites and Deal of the Day options, as well as weekly/monthly newsletters carrying information about new releases, special promotions, and (often) a free ttrpg product of the month.

However, on top of that, when you purchase a game or follow publishing pages, you can also get emails about new releases specific to those creators, as well as updates if a new version of a game you bought has been added. Often if it’s a game you already bought, this means you own the new version too - something that DriveThru has in common with Itch!

The Follow Your Favourites announcements will line up with whatever you’ve chosen to follow on the website. I’ve asked for updates about new Core Rulebooks, and I also get updates from the Onyx Path and a few other places where I found games I really liked. I also check the Deal of the Day offers fairly regularly; sometimes there are really really good deals offered and if it’s a game you know or like, then you don’t want to miss out on a sale!

Wishlists

DriveThru allows you to add games to wishlists to look at later, and even gives you the ability to sort your wishlists, although the process feels harder to look through than Itch does; I think it might be a UI issue.

However, because it acts like a wishlist, you can move games from the wishlist into your cart and vice versa, as well as move the games to another list. One really nice thing about the wishlist section is that DriveThru will alway show you when something you want is on sale, and how much it is normally - Itch does this too, but in this case, DriveThru is much easier to read!

I mostly sort my wishlists into Core Rulebooks and Supplements, because I don’t have nearly as many games bookmarked on DriveThru. If it exists on Itch, I store it on Itch - but there are plenty of other, “someday’ games, that I want to be able to find again in the future.

Your Library

DriveThruRPG has an app that you can download onto your computer or your phone, and it basically acts as a library that you can look through. In both the webpage and the app, you can sort your purchases alphabetically, from new to old, by publisher, by whether or not they were updated, and using similar categories as the search bar on the store front.

Free things can definitely be found here, even if they’re harder to look for. On DriveThru, most free products are things like character sheets, playtest games, or Quickstarts. However, some publishers do put up their stuff for free. Whenever I can get a Quickstart of something interesting, or if I find something being offered for free, I add it to my library. Free games are how I got started in ttrpgs, and QuickStarts are wonderful introductions to a system that usually give you a good idea of what the game is going to feel like.

Conclusion

Overall, DriveThruRPG is great for folks who like certain big publishing houses, and folks who like a good deal. I personally usually end up on the site because something in my emails caught my eye, which is the opposite of how I navigate Itch. DriveThru was my home base before I discovered Itch.io, so I still have a little fondness for the website, even if looking through it is a little bit of a slog.

One thing that might be a bit of an annoyance is that if you own something from a certain company, they might be able to send you a lot of emails for every sale and new product. If this becomes too much, you can choose to opt out from those publishers.

If you don’t want to have to actively engage with the website as much as say, Itch, DriveThru’s email system is also a big help. You can customize your subscriptions to match what you’re interested in, and then just check your emails once in a while to see what’s on offer. After a while you’ll also learn about yearly events, like the Summer Sale, which often provides big discounts on a lot of different games.

DriveThru is also a great place to start if you’re looking for print versions of games: I don’t know what shipping is like to places outside Canada, but I definitely appreciate that it’s an option, and sometimes all you need to do is find a game or publisher - once you know that it exists, you can google that publisher, check out their website, and figure out the best place to order from there.

[genericpuff]

LORE | REKINDLED EPISODE 42 - TO THE RESCUE

Previous episode | Next episode

Y'all, this episode. Holy crap. I know it's not a very long one and not much in terms of plot happens compared to previous episodes, but it's one that I've been looking forward to for ages now because it gave me the opportunity to pay tribute to that original sequence in S1, a sequence that captivated so many fans and former fans of the comic such as myself (I had the final panel as my phone background for like 2 years LMAO). Being able to redraw that scene with our own twist on it was such an amazing process, made all the better by @banshriek's amazing contributions in the background art (seriously, the background art is CARRYING this episode, I'm so grateful and proud of their work and how much they've contributed to this little spite project).

What also helped immensely was our recent anon savior who provided us with so many brush names and design notes for how they're used in LO, we had waaay too much fun using these brushes every chance we got LOL and we're gonna continue to use them because goddamn they're beautiful. Buckle up because the new year is gonna be LIT (•̀⌄•́)

In other news, halfway through the production of this episode I finally replaced my PC drawing tablet! I'm still using my Huion Kamvas 22 Plus as a monitor, but in searching for a new screen tablet, I got cold feet and decided to settle for a cheaper desk tablet instead, a Huion Inspiroy Giano. So far it's great, it's a bit on the larger side which I didn't fully realize when I bought it, so it's taken quite a bit of adjusting (plus I haven't used a desk tablet as my main drawing tool in... geez, 8 years??) but it's like riding a bike, you never really forget LOL So yeah, it's gonna make my drawing workflow a lot faster and more efficient now that I don't have to rely purely on my iPad (goodbye touch screen mishaps, hello keyboard shortcuts!) so I'm hoping it'll show in the episodes to come!

Thank you all so much for reading ( ´ ∀ `)ノ～ ♡

[iridescentscarecrow]

what frustrates me about fandom interpretations of makima as a one note Source of evil, apart from the fact that the manga itself refutes this, is that her character haunts and ties together so much of part two that it's impossible to fully understand without understanding her.

makima isn't ever a unilateral antagonistic force. she's an agent of the institutional evil that looms over all of CSM. she's in as much a commentary on gender and performance of gender as denji is.

and fjmt in part two enacts the "haunting the narrative" trope in such an interesting manner because you see flashes of makima in every female character. you see elements of her diluted into, most visibly, the characters of asa, nayuta and fumiko.

in asa, i see makima in that yearning for connection. i see her in the way that asa herself is fundamentally unable to approach the relationship of equals that she so desperately desires, partly due to her own social awkwardness but also because of yoru's threat: everyone she gets close to turns into a weapon. the fundamental inequality to human relationships that makima is unable to overcome.

during the aquarium date, you see asa echo makima again and again in lines that evoke makima's purposing of denji. that weaponising. "i'll grant you any request / save me chainsaw man! / you don't have to think about a thing."

and her connection with denji also founds itself upon this. yoshida talks to asa about parasocial relationships -- rerendering makima's idealisation of the CSM in how asa sees denji as a love interest. asa and denji parallel each other so organically in their gendered suppression and portrusion of desire. it's a punctuation of denji's search for intimacy that's mirrored by makima's in part one. exploring how asa is different from makima is perhaps the most intriguing part of this reflection though: an example being the way asa overthinks her outfit for her date with denji while makima seamlessly models herself into an Effortless woman.

[it's not like asa borrows just from makima. for example, there are things to be said about the way she views her Body (as compared with reze and quanxi) but examining how mkm's character bleeds into asaden is quite compelling.]

nayuta being the most visible remnant of what makima was is also interesting because makima herself appears so little in nayuta beyond the surface. nayuta's role as the control devil is hinted at frequently as is her appearance resembling makima's

but her and denji's dynamic more often echoes the hayakawa family and pochita than anything else. consider: aki giving up his goal (his 'easy revenge' that he finally sees for what it is) for the sake of his family, that warmth of blood and platonic bodily intimacy that power embodies--

it's all referenced to again with nayuta and denji, in direct panel callbacks and the plot itself! nayuta is The Family that makima constructs for denji in part one to pull him along the plot she prepares. i'm thinking about how makima is an allegory for capitalism. and what the family unit means in a capitalistic structure. the propagation of an ideal that hinges on birth and descendancy, about narrative and reproduction of narrative, about how nayuta births herself from makima and denji's relationship.

and this is also why nayuta herself exerts so much control over denji in the plot, as well as why she's used as a piece to control him. in part one, family was used to create the Chainsaw Man from denji. in part two, it's used to make denji abandon the Chainsaw Man, this icon that the church and the public now take possession of. [something something alienation of the worker from the product. from the collective. from the self.]

fumiko is perhaps the hardest to pin down here because her role evolves as the fandomisation of the Chainsaw Man evolves too. in fact, as a denji fan, she represents not just makima but multiple people who see something in and want something from denji! (think of how she references reze in her highlighting how denji is just a child; how reze uses her commentary on denji to engage with her Self. it's fandomisation,,, and what is makima but Chainsaw Man's fan?)

fumiko most obviously calls back to these wants and their conceptualisation of denji in the raw sexual violence that the events in the theater scene moving into the karaoke scene embody. the undercurrent of sa that runs through p1 and p2 is brought to the forefront in this scene -- denji falling back into these cycles of abuse, him slipping into habitating the wants of others (his initial horrified expression and then his grin during the fight. his initial inner monologue and then the cut to him licking the tentacle.)

so much of CSM rests on this fandom of denji, this theme of what production and idealisation means, one you can trace through fjmt's body of work. and this fandom reaches its crescendo in p2. what's even more interesting about fumiko is her pathos under this layer. her seeing denji as denji at some level but in the end, her handling of him is so selfish. her echoing makima's uninhibited laughter at the horror of denji's situation, her predatory cruelty. denji simultaneously humanised and dehumanised through her fandom.

fjmt's characters exist as foils, as parallels and ideas. makima's character has such a stranglehold over part one and these ideas run over into part two naturally -- as a consequence of denji being a reciever of these themes, but also deliberately in fjmt evoking the Thing that is makima repetitively -- to underscore the forever re emerging structure that denji and now asa are trapped in. the same structure that makima produced and was simultaneously caged by.

[gloomwitchwrites]

Can you do something angsty with Kylo ren for the 1k follower event? Like makeup/breakup (or both) preferably with a little 🌶️🥵

Kylo Ren, my favorite sad boy. Maybe it’s because I have such a crush on Adam Driver, but I adore Kylo Ren. Maybe it’s because I love dark side-leaning hotties. (Although nothing compares to Darth Maul but I digress). Now, I (personally) see Kylo Ren/Ben Solo as one person, just different personas, however, for this prompt, we’re talking about Kylo Ren. How would Kylo Ren react to a makeup/breakup scenario?? Honestly? Probably not well. Let’s be real.

Most of these are with gn!reader w/ an exception or two.

Content & Warnings (MDNI): angst, toxic/unhealthy relationships, suggestive themes, possessive behavior, non-descriptive mentions of sex

Word Count: 587

ao3 // taglist // main masterlist // 1k follower event masterlist

First and foremost, with how toxic the First Order is, and everyone wanting leverage on others in order to move up the ranks, Kylo would never be open about his relationship with you. He would do everything in his power to hide his relationship with you for that very reason. It’s almost giving Anakin hiding Padme from the Jedi, but in a different light.

Of everyone that might know, it would be Supreme Leader Snoke. Snoke would absolutely use this relationship to manipulate Kylo Ren. He’d encourage the passion but would also devise ways to undermine Kylo’s relationship with you. He’s basically Palpatine in that regard.

The breakup would come from you, not from Kylo Ren unless Snoke deliberately told him to call it off. Even then, I think Kylo would try to hang on to you. He leans toward the dark side but he’s not Sith. He just wants to belong, and he wants to be wanted.

The breakup isn’t explosive or argumentative. If anything, Kylo appears outwardly calm.  It’s almost frustrating for you because you wanted some kind of reaction from him.

It’s the afterward, when you leave, that Kylo loses it. That lightsaber is coming out and heads are rolling. He’ll never unleash his anger on you, but he’ll unleash his anger on stormtroopers, control panels, and literally anything else that might be in his way.

After Kylo has cooled off, he’s going to come after you. This man is determined to hunt you down and keep you by his side, even if you don’t want it. Let’s be real here folks, Kylo’s love is toxic and unhealthy, especially if we’re talking about Force Awakens & Last Jedi Kylo Ren. This man will search the galaxy to find you again.

He’ll do it himself, too. He’s not leaving this task up to stormtroopers or to Hux. Kylo and his Knights are coming after you. Period.

When he does find you again, you put up a fight, but you’re no match for him. Kylo drags you back with him and confines you to a room. It’s comfortable, and you have everything you need, but you’re not allowed to leave.

Kylo visits you often, and in this, he is also calm—to a point. He insists you made the wrong choice, and is fairly reasonable about it. But of course, you push his buttons. Eventually, he fractures, and he’s more like the Kylo we see in the interrogation room with Rey. Kylo has patience, but it’s only for you.

This back-and-forth eventually implodes, coming to a head that only ends with the two of you reuniting physically.

It’s Kylo that acts first. He wants you, and he always wants you to stop talking for a few seconds. Which is why he grabs the back of your neck and draws you in for a kiss.

You don’t fight him. You melt into him, wrapping your arms around his neck. These first few kisses are all soft, and then quickly devolve into insistence.

Clothes are ripped away from bodies until it’s skin-against-skin.

Kylo needs to dominate here. He needs to establish that he’s the one in control and that you only want him.

He won’t force anything. Kylo will never cross that line.

Kylo will need verbal confirmation that you’re his. He might delay or even control your orgasm just to hear you say that you belong to him.

Kylo will make you beg, and won’t give you your end until he’s complete satisfied that you’re his again.

taglist:

@padawancat97 @foxxy-126 @glassgulls @km-ffluv @sweetbutpsychobutsweet

@singleteapot @garfunklevibes2012 @tiredmetalenthusiast @childofyuggoth @miaraei

@coffeecaketornado @kayden666 @cherryofdeath @enfppuff @ninman82

@no-oneelsebutnsu @ferns-fics @beebeechaos @tulipsun-flower @nomercyforthewarrior

@hantheconqueror

[illym]

Hi, hello, if you like reading about localization choices be sure to check below the cut because I Had Fun Here (not being sarcastic. It was enjoyable learning about vinegar in Japan).

Translation Assistance: @masked-and-doomed + @solradguy

ID in alt.

Cleaned and original comics below the cut.

Specific Assistance:

@.masked-and-doomed: transcribed what I couldn't pick up.

@.solradguy: Verified the translation of what the npc was saying in panel 4, offered a line for it.

Fun fact: The Japanese department of a college all got together to work on this one.

I hated redrawing the back of Ky's head. I'm glad I was able to hide most of it behind the text (lol).

Anyway, let's get on with the localization (and process) discussion!

In the original text of this comic, Ky was drinking vinegar.

"But Illym," you ask, face twisted in confusion, "Huh? Who drinks vinegar as a drink for fun? Is the joke that being compared to Robo-Ky made him go mad and believe that vinegar is delicious? Did you change the joke? Why are you writing me to be so verbose?"

I'm a very verbose person. To answer the rest of your questions, here's what DeepL gave me when I put the transcript in.

[

npc:

Captain… it's only the body that gets soft from drinking vinegar.

ky:

I… This is for your health!

npc:

If you drink it without diluting it, you'll get a stomach ache.

]

At first, I assumed that DeepL has misinterpreted some other drink as vinegar, such as cider, sake, or general alcohol. In this example, even, it translated Ky as saying "For your health" when within context he should obviously be saying "For my health".

I went to [ https://jpdb.io/ ] to check the line. Lo and behold, it still translated as vinegar. Hm. By this point, I'm fairly sure it's a cultural thing that I'll have to localize, but I try to be thorough in these things as, again, I don't understand the language and rely on machine translation. I search up vinegar in English in jpdb and find the Japanese character there immediately. So it's obviously the same word, not a messy translation.

My next course of action is to look up "drinking vinegar japan".

To summarize, according to the articles/blog posts I read, the process of making vinegar is just adding an extra step to the process of making sake. After that, if it's to be drinking vinegar, it's blended with sweeteners such as honey or fruit.

It's an extremely old drink in Japan, and it's seen as a health drink there (along with, I assume, being pretty tasty). You should go read up on it yourself.

But in the western world, drinking vinegar is... Not a big thing. While I could leave it as is and just write a translators note explaining the drink, I decided that given that Ky is French and Japan has been exploded for ~100 years, it would be more lore accurate to have him drink something else. If it was Anji or Baiken, I would have left it.

Also, it's more enjoyable and easier to understand to make it ambiguously alcohol instead of requiring a 4 paragraph explanation.

So to localize, I removed mention of vinegar and made the joke into Ky drinking too much alcohol. The NPC's worries apply to alcohol as well as drinking vinegar (drinking it makes you soft, it affects your body poorly, drinking too much is Seen as bad for your health) so it made for the smoothest change.

As I write this, I'm debating whether to add a translators note between panels saying that the bottle reads 'vinegar'... It'll get people curious, at least!

Original translation of the comic below.

[glossysoap]

ready to comply v - изоляция

изоляция or isolation is defined as;

the process or fact of isolating or being isolated.

tags/warnings: pov change from 141 to reader, phantom limb/pain, talk of human waste (sorry), uncleanliness, torture, hallucinations, fake death.

prev chapters here!

word count: 2,876

🏷️: @viylikescats @warenai @briacreations96 @fullmoon-94 @breadboyye @kiroshang @zvdvdlvr @lunitalloronaa @itzzjxlyn @lonely-ofc @m0rganit3 @badbishsblog @wolfyland07 @angelsdemonsmonsters @unkn0wnd3ad @itstokyo-cos @c1rice @venusianlustt @bugonawall @wakusbonkus @blackrose4242 @blackgaladriel @lilpothoscuttings @thvxr @tapioca-marzipan @undercover-smutlover @nickangel13 @luvmeijii @atjamesbbarnes @h-leigh @writingmybeloved @chloeforde @divine--serenity @hunterbunter3000 (if ur name is striked out, it means tumblr wouldn’t let me tag, sorry)

When you assumed that the 141 wouldn’t send out a search and rescue team for you, you were right.

When you assumed that by the time the 141 discovered you were missing, that it would be too late, you were right.

When you assumed that they would be too preoccupied with the next mission to look for you, you were right.

That much was proved to be true when Shepherd uttered the words, “You know I can’t let you do that, John.” The General couldn’t send out his best soldiers to go searching for some medic that was probably already long dead by now. The General wouldn’t.

John chuckled without humor, shaking his head in disbelief.

“So what then, General? Because they were the only surgeon I trusted with my team!” He shouted, nostrils flaring.

Shepherd chose his next words carefully, still paranoid after being ambushed in that conference room and almost assaulted by the Lieutenant.

“So, we’ll hope for the best and prepare for the worst. We will have a list of potential.. replacements as soon as possible.”

John’s throat tightened and tears pricked his eyes but he didn’t let them fall. No, not in front of the emotionless, insensitive General, who John knew never liked you that much anyway.

So the Captain pressed his lips together and nodded to himself, before walking out of the conference room. He walked the halls of his base with a clenched jaw and a feeling of barbed wire wrapped around his throat.

Soon, you were also right about being replaced.

Corporate quickly pulled your name from any employee record or planners. Your name was pulled from payroll and all of your previous medical cases were sealed forever. Any of your current patients were transferred to a different surgeon, along with the medical plan you had created. Your room was even cleared of all of your belongings and put into a box - down to every last post-it note, picture frame and candle. The gold plaque on your door that had your name printed on it was even scraped from the wood, leaving it blank for someone else’s name.

Worst of all, was when the interviews began. Way too soon in the Task Force’s opinion. Laswell, Price and Shepherd had formed a panel including themselves and your previous medical assistants in order to find the best replacement. Price tried to ignore the sullen looks on your assistants’ faces when they were trying to find a new surgeon. You were their friend and mentor, after all.

Once they had finally found someone suitable for the job, the new surgeon moved into your medbay the medbay. They put their grubby little hands on it. They rearranged all of the medical supplies into a different order, one that made no sense compared to the way you organized things. Even the way they triaged patients irked the Task Force, it was all way too busy and chaotic instead of the coordinated way you triaged.

When it came to being treated by your replacement, 141’s hackles rose. They would glare daggers at the surgeon, tempted to refuse treatment from anyone other than you. No one could administer injections like you could. No one could insert an IV like you, they would always end up losing a vein or leaving the patients arm with bruises. Your replacement took too long to come up with diagnoses, leaving the team out of commission for longer than necessary.

At every single turn, the entire Task Force knew that if you were here, you would’ve put that “replacement” to absolute shame.

But when you assumed that the team would be better off with you gone? You couldn’t have been more wrong.

The atmosphere at the base shifted immediately after you were announced missing in action, and presumably killed in action.

It was an unspoken grief that neither Simon or Johnny could swallow, no matter how hard they tried. Where the warmth usually resided in their chest, a piercing ache replaced it, leaving a hole where you should be. The hole in their chest was always there, digging deeper and deeper with each passing minute without you.

Their throats went raw and tight every time they found themselves looking for you, on pure instinct. They would search for you wearing your scrubs in the medbay, only to find your replacement standing in your place. They would listen for the pitter-patter of your feet as they worked out in the gym, so accustomed to you talking to them while they lifted weights. They would listen and listen, expecting you to pop up next to them — only for you to never appear. They would find themselves walking by your door and slowing to a stop. They would raise a fist to knock on your door, only to stop an inch from the door when they remembered that you weren’t there.

Everywhere they looked, they were reminded of you. They saw pieces of you everywhere on base, pieces you left behind.

(….)

For days or weeks on end, you were locked in that room as you slept on that uncomfortable cot.

Days passed, you weren’t sure how many, but you knew they were passing nonetheless. It could’ve been two days, five days, or even weeks. You had no idea.

You were kept in that room with no water. Your stomach was constantly growling and aching for even a sleeve of crackers. Your throat was dry and sore, even swallowing hurt because of how thirsty you were.

The only nourishment you were granted was two protein shakes a day, tossed into your cell first thing in the morning. They tasted of protein powder and synthetic nutrients, making you cringe whenever you sipped it - though you did savor it as the only ‘food’ you ever got.

The shakes were the only calories you could rely on so that you didn’t starve to death in that cell.

The effects of dehydration had already begun taking it’s toll on you. Your head was constantly pounding and you found yourself pressing against your eye socket to try and relieve the migraine. You had already emptied your stomach multiple times throughout your imprisonment because of the nausea, the smell wafting from the buckets only making it worse. You were only thankful that you hadn’t started experiencing hallucinations.

You had no way of knowing how much time had passed because there were no clocks or windows. There was no sunlight to illuminate the room or tell you when the sun was rising or setting. There was no dusk or dawn. Just a cold, grey concrete room.

The lighting panels on the ceiling was the only thing providing light to the dreary room. The light never turned off, not even for an hour. You were thoroughly convinced that your captors knew you might use the light schedule to measure time, so they just kept the lights on. Every minute of every day. Burning your corneas and making it impossible to get any rest.

The room was filled with a disgusting, nauseating odor that stemmed from two buckets in the corner of the room. You were forced to relieve yourself in those buckets, the smell of your waste making you gag with almost every breath.

The only way you could ever sleep during that time was to pull your shirt over your head. At least then you wouldn’t have to see that bright light or smell that putrid odor.

In all that time you were kept there, you sat in the same pair of cargo pants and muscle shirt that you woke up in, never granted a shower much less freedom from this room. For days or even weeks, you were stewing in your own dirt and sweat. Your body reeked and your greasy hair was tangled up in a rats nest in the back.

You could only imagine what you looked like.

You had no socks or shoes, so your feet were adorned in scrapes and bruises from being dragged around weeks prior. From not having any access to a bath, much less a moisturizer, your feet were becoming dry and cracked. There were also scabs decorating the heels of your feet due to pieces of glass and debris scattered on the floor of the room. You winced and limped with any step you took on your bloody, raw feet.

Your body was sore, no doubt holding wounds under your skin. Sore burning wrapped around your right wrist and elbow, serving as a reminder of when those soldiers tore you from that redhead and dragged you into that room. You knew that if your left arm was still there, your real left arm, you would feel the same burning soreness mirrored there.

Your stab wound was messily stitched shut and bandaged over, still leaving you with sharp pains if you twisted or turned a certain way. Your neck was sore and bloody due to all of the needle pricks from off market drugs, steroids and sedatives.

Throbbing, stabbing pain radiated from your left arm shoulder all the way throughout your body. It was pain you couldn’t place — pain that you knew didn’t truly come from your shoulder, but that was the last part of your arm that remained. Logically, that was the only place it should be coming from.

It wasn’t just surface level pain either. It dove deep into your nerves that ran all through your body, shocking each one with a jolt of electricity that made you wince and whimper in pain.

It consumed every cell in your body. Lighting every blood vessel on fire, flaying your muscles alive. It made the nerves in your back and arms tense up, rendering you immobile until your body finally relaxed.

Sooner or later though, delirium would begin setting in. Forcing you to crumble from the pain and surrender to exhaustion, and letting your eyelids flutter closed.

Even in your unconscious state, you were miserable. Your heartbeat pounded in your already aching head. Your throat scratched with every inhale and exhale. The skin that met metal on your left shoulder was still searing as if you were being branded like cattle.

In some ways you were.

With every labored wheeze, your chest screamed in white hot pain that was reminiscent of the knife piercing your abdomen. The stitches threatened to rip open with any sharp intake of breath or involuntary muscle twitch. Every single scrape, bruise and gash that littered your body still screamed in pain while you slept. Your face was still screwed up in agony, brows furrowed and eyes clenched shut.

Your dreams were filled with light and warmth, blossoming safety and protection. You dreamed of your safe haven that lied solely in Johnny and Simon. Your dreams were filled with Johnny's warmth. His tan skin and cerulean eyes, crinkling with his booming laughter at some stupid joke you told him. His big arms that were corded with muscle, wrapping around you in a comforting embrace. His husky, accented voice that sounded like pure honey as he complimented you. Your dreams were filled with Simon's instinctual protection. Flashes of him braking hard in the Hum-vee, making sure to lash out a tattooed arm in front of your stomach to shield you. Flashes of him gently taking your chin in his hand and tilting your face after an explosive goes off, ensuring that your ears weren’t bleeding and no debris had hit your face. Flashes of him sweeping you off your feet and carrying you in his arms the second he sees you sporting limp on a mission.

In the dream, you heard their voices as clear as day. You welcomed it, even in the dream, because you feared that would be the last time you ever heard their voices.

“Bonnie,” Johnny's accented voice echoed in your head, a bit cloudy from being submerged in the rest of the dream.

“Lovie,” Simon's usually commanding voice had softened remarkably, as if he wanted to comfort you and drag you further into slumber.

Their voices continued overlapping in your dream, acting as a tether to your unconscious state. You hung onto every last word, every last syllable, desperate to be out of this hell hole. Even if dreaming would be your only escape, you would gladly take it.

In your dream, they would cup your cheek and wipe away the fat tears that fall down your face. They would pull you into their chests and let you bury your face in their vests, soaking the fabric with your tears and snot.

“We got you,” they would murmur in your dream, pressing kisses to the crown of your head.

They kept repeating that phrase, turning into a mantra of sorts, becoming louder with each repetition.

They became so loud in fact, that it pulled you from your state of consciousness and made you gasp awake.

“We got you, Y/N!” They shouted as you took in your surroundings.

What you saw made tears pool in your eyes. Captain Price, Kyle, Johnny and Simon. They were all storming into your room, dressed in their usual combat gear and sporting their preferred assault rifles. Racing over to your cot with concern etched onto their faces as they took in your injured state, tear stained face and your new arm.

Before they could make even two steps toward you, gun shots rang out from Russian soldiers.

“No!” You wailed, vision blurring and lips trembling.

Blood spattered on the walls and onto the floor as the bullets tore apart the bodies of the four men in your life. Their corpses bodies fell limp on the dirty floor, blood pooling around them. Their guts and intestines were spilling out of their stomach. You could see their muscle and fat, covered in a sheen of crimson.

You could only sob as you watched the life drain from the four men’s eyes.

Captain Price was still just looking at you, his lips freezing in a sad smile as his eyes glazed over. His hat was knocked off during the shooting, revealing his hair bloodied and matted. Brain matter scattered the surrounding area.

Kyle was staring up at the ceiling, eyes looking but not actually seeing. In addition to taking multiple rounds in his chest, his carotid artery was shot, leaving him to quickly bleed to death.

You screamed into your hands when it came to your last two boys, to the loves of your life.

Johnny was smiling, somehow. Even as his mohawk was soaked in blood and brain matter. Even as his face was splattered in his own guts, and blood was leaking from his mouth. He was still fucking smiling at you, his pearly whites now tainted by the crimson liquid. His eyes drove a knife through your heart and twisted. His once vibrant cerulean eyes were now empty and drained of any life. There was no emotion, no warmth.

Looking at Simon is what took that same knife that was buried in your heart, and thrusted it back in. Over and over and over. His mask had fallen off from the hitting the ground so hard. His honeyed eyes that once entranced you, enthralled you, were now rolled back into his skull. His face was revealed for anyone to see. Only it was covered in blood, every single inch of it. His bleach blond hair was drenched in crimson, the strands sticking to his forehead. His eyelashes that used to be so white and pretty were now covered in the same liquid as it dripped down his face. His mouth was open in a silent scream, blood trickling out of his mouth. His neck was torn apart, allowing you to see every muscle and tendon and even some bone.

Both Johnny's hands were outstretched, reaching towards you. Even when they were dead. Murdered. Slaughtered. They were still reaching out for you.

No pain in the world could compare to this. You clutched your stomach and screamed, trying to get rid of the pain in your heart but you couldn’t. You just kept wailing and gasping for air.

They were all dead.

Dead because of you.

No matter where you looked, there was blood. On the walls, on the floor, on the cot. Some had even splattered onto you.

Fitting, considering their blood was on your hands. Literally and figuratively.

You tried to close your eyes but all you saw was dead eyes and gaping holes, skin torn apart and muscle shredded to pieces. You tried to convince yourself that it was all just a dream, conjured up by your state of delirium. But every time you peeked your eyes open, your worst fears were just confirmed.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” You sobbed.

“I’m so sorry. It should have been me.”

Suddenly, the door to your room creaked open and in the blink of an eye, everything changed. The scene before you completely disappeared. All of the bodies were gone, along with all of the intestines and guts piled around them. The pools of blood were gone, the floor wasn’t even stained from it.

The room was exactly the same as it had been for weeks.

It was all a hallucination. They never came for you. They were never murdered right in front of you. They were alive.

You were going insane, but they were alive.

The relief that flooded your chest was short lived once you saw who opened the door. It was the same doctor who wielded the bone saw.

The doctor that dismembered you.

next chapter

©️ glossysoap 2024. please do not steal, copy, plagiarize, translate, or repost any of my works without my permission. do not steal any elements of my theme without permission.

[emeryhiro]

My Thoughts on TBOC SDCC Panel & Interviews

First off, I felt like a kid again watching Melissa and Norman on an SDCC panel for the first time and was overwhelmed by so many positive emotions ♡

Regarding what was covered during the panel and what I'll be sharing my thoughts on, in this post, I'm going to try to keep it brief and only talk about things that are new to me compared to what I heard during the Tribeca panel and in my thoughts post on it [here].

~~~~~~

Zabel on his responsibility with the show:

Firstly, Zabel is actually pretty funny, and every time he speaks about the show I find myself trusting him more and more and feeling more confident that he knows what he's doing. I especially loved how he said, and I quote:

"There is a responsibility to live up to the standards of The Walking Dead, the standards that Norman and Melissa had as actors creating these characters. So that's the part where you wanna make sure that you don't let anybody down, you don't let the fans down, you don't let the actors down, you don't let the history of the show down. You have to at least try to maintain the same standard and hopefully maybe even push it forward."

Melissa, on her return to the show:

It was wonderful hearing her speak about how much she missed Carol and how excited she is about, and I quote:

"getting to go forward in France, where [Norman] set the roots, thank you very much. I had some things I had to do"

and how France will be a catalyst for all sorts of changes for Daryl and Carol.

I love how much she said she enjoyed the role of an EP, and I have no doubt she's brilliant in it. My main thought here is that I really hope that, like Lauren and Danai, she also has the chance to direct an episode in season 3, because whatever she touches will end up being Gold.

Norman on Daryl and Carol's bond:

I loved how he described their bond as cosmic and beyond tangible. Carol can sense that there's something wrong with Daryl even from across an ocean and vice versa, which is so true to their characters. They don't need to say a single word for the other to understand everything they're thinking and feeling.

Also, when he said:

"He's starting to lose that feeling cause he's been there so long,"

Melissa's face and reaction had me laughing out loud. What do you mean, Norman? Can you please elaborate on that for us?

If I had to guess what he means, I'd say it links to Daryl's self-esteem and his idea of self-worth. As I've mentioned before, it's obvious to me that the longer Daryl has been away from Carol, the more he's regressing into his old self and habits, and I think this feeds into that. I think he doesn't believe he's worth being loved, searching for, or crossing the Atlantic for. And that sense of security and confidence that he'd built with his family in America is slowly climbing away.

In comparison, Carol has always been one of, if not the strongest, characters on the show. Yes, she is struggling without Daryl, but the moment she's told his life is in danger, she has this overpowering sense of motivation and strength that she'll do anything to save him.

Norman on his favourite scene (The Reunion):

The words he used to describe the reunion scene and how he felt about it really had me in a puddle... especially the comparison he makes at the end, and I quote:

"When we meet, when that finally happens, there's a build to that that happens, and we worked really hard to make that scene what it was, and that kind of was fireworks going off inside me"

This is the sweetest description of the scene, and I don't know if my heart can handle it.

Additional moments I loved:

I love how both Melissa and Norman keep checking on Louis to make sure he's okay.

Norman calling Melissa his partner in crime, describing how excited he was for her to come back, watching her work, and Melissa's reactions to his words 😭❤️‍🩹

Overall, I just love how they appreciate, support, and genuinely love each other so much ♡♡♡

~~~~

Thank you for taking the time to read this. We're so close to having them back on our screens, and I'm so overwhelmed by the excitement for the new season!!

I'd love to read all of your thoughts on the trailer and panel, whether in response to this post or a post of your own; I can't wait to read it ♡♡♡

[riririnnnn]

As I mentioned in my post earlier:

His cuff (that thing around his neck) is near transparent which gives us a lot of room to ponder since we don't exactly know what this chain even represent.

Taking Hiori as an example, let's suppose the chain represents the burden that holds back someone's true ego.

His cuff being transparent gives us two things:

1. It might be plastic which doesn't really make any sense if I were to be honest.

2. It is glass which makes a lot of sense because how's glass? Hell yeah, my geniuses, glass is really fragile which completely fits into what he said:

Further, in that volume cover, he has pulled down his collar which puts a lot of spotlight into his blue rose tattoo, and we all know what that tattoo symbolises for Kaiser.

In case you don't remember: Kaiser got this tattoo as a reminder to himself to never fall back into his weak mentality because Blue Rose symbolises the achievement of impossible, and he saw it as an example to turn impossible to reality since Blue Rose, itself, is artificial and defies the natural order.

What is said above can be found with a quick Google search:

But what grabbed my most attention is this panel:

WHY?

If he only wanted to push the soccer industry to despair, then why he is adamant about winning the Champions league and the World Cup?????

Also, contrary to popular beliefs, I don't actually think Kaiser has a superiority complex because, look:

What Chris said could be considered as an exaggerated way to rile someone, but isn't this, indirectly, exactly what Kaiser says after the Manshine City match ended?

Kaiser said something along the lines of, "BM's main character is Noa and it's impossible for me to be the current number one, that's why I came to NEL to use Isagi as a way to increase my value." He even went as far as to say that he is a secondary character in BM because BM is Noa's team.

I don't think so that anyone with superior complex will admit such real facts.

Further, why did he got so angry when Chris said those things? Isn't someone bound to be angrier if the other one was to point out their obvious weak point? So, does this mean, Kaiser actually got an inferior complex?

I'm not a psychologist, so I'm not dwelling too much into it.

However, there is another thing I want to point out:

So, because of that spreadsheet/official art of a very damaged soccer ball beside Kaiser's foot, the Fandom widely believes that Kaiser was poor while growing up .

BUT!

Being poor as a backstory has already been used three times: Naruhaya Asahi, Noel Noa, and Lorenzo Don.

I understand that in any sector with a lot of money and/or fame, there are many people who come from a poor economic background, but this is fiction, baby. No author wants anything be repeated to the point it feels overused.

That's why, I highly believe that Kaiser was either bullied or mistreated by his seniors when he started playing soccer which explains that he practiced fucking hard that the soccer ball was damaged, and also his supposed hatred towards the soccer industry. It also explains his long, unkempt hair because he was too indulged in practice.

OR!

It goes a bit darker, so proceed with caution:

Soccer somehow destroyed his family's peace just like the brotherhood of Itoshi brothers.

I may write about others in another post, but in this post, I would like to think that the person who destroyed his family's peace was his own father. It could be that his father was a soccer player himself and due to some circumstances, he fell off the soccer industry which took a toll on his mental health, and he started physically abusing either Kaiser, his mom or both.

Why physical abuse? Because Kaiser is shown having an affinity to choking.

If we get our minds out of the gutter, then there have been instances when he choked himself because he was frustrated. Also, didn't he say that he stroked his rose tattoo as a good luck before matches and compared it to, "as if tightening a noose," or something.

That's why, I kinda think that, AT LEAST, someone has choked Kaiser as abuse/bullying.

I'll rant about the above thing in another post tomorrow or some time later because I don't want this post to be too long, and also because I'm hungry af.

.

.

.

I remember a vivid dream when Kaiser threatened me to join BM.

[addicted-to-dc]

AK!Jason Todd x Catwoman’s protégé! Reader - Just for tonight, Kitty - Pt 2

I really had to squeeze my brain to get this out, but I cannot wait for maybe part 3 👀? I have some ideas revolving around a fic or two for Gotham Knights! Jason. We shall see.

Link to part 1

Content: mind control, violence (obv), toxic af relationship, lovers to enemies to lovers (again)?

----------

It feels like you’re being puppeteered, every movement meticulously controlled by strings and sticks. It almost feels like last Tuesday. You had infiltrated Star Labs to steal some new tech designs, especially when Batman was distracted by Catwoman.

Security is nothing compared to your skill, even if you’re not completely yourself. It takes a bit longer than you’d prefer, but you finally make it to Stagg’s office.

Adjusting your goggles, you scan the area for anything that could spoil your fun. One by one, you check off your mental list until you clear the room. Most rich CEOs usually hide their deepest darkest secrets, not wanting an inkling of them to be discovered. Not Stagg, though, you know his type.

Walking around the room, your eyes scan over the décor. A man like Stagg likes to be reminded of his accomplishments. The publicity photos, front page Gotham Gazette articles, the whole nostalgic works. Everything seems to stroke his ego one way or another, but then you finally see what you’re looking for. At first, it seems like a piece of trash thrown onto a table. No, it’s the focal point, the center of it all.

You scan over the structure before carefully opening it. A flash drive appears, absolutely begging to be taken away from this place. Readying yourself, you snag the drive and place the top back on.  Just as you’re about to head to the door, you hear footsteps approaching. You immediately head for the window, quickly dismantling the alarm as you pry a panel open.

Closing it just in time, you push yourself up against the exterior of the building. Letting out a breath, you move further away from the window and jump. Falling with the rain, you crack your whip and swing off a flagpole. The momentum sends you buildings away from Stagg Enterprises, finally completing what Jason… what the Arkham Knight ordered you to do.

“It’s done.”

Despite the job being done and over with, you still have no control over yourself. Your body keeps moving, heading deeper and deeper into parts of the city you’ve never even seen. Landing softly in an alleyway, your body heads straight towards the end of it. Even your sensors fail to pick anything out of the ordinary. Why has he brought you here?

You hear him land behind you after a few moments. Turning around, you move to hand him the flash drive. The Knight acknowledges it with a head tilt before taking it from you. It disappears in one of his pockets. As soon as his hands are free, he presses a button on his wrist.

You tear your helmet off as soon as your body catches up with your mind. Rage builds into your chest as you lash out at him. He can’t prevent your claws from screeching along his armor until you finally find skin.

“You just come back from the dead and USE ME?!” you scream, grunting as he grabs your arm and twists it behind your back.

You try to lash out with your free arm, but he quickly dodges the attack. Before you know it, your back is against the cold brick wall of the alleyway. One hand holds yours above your head, the other trails across your cheek to wipe away rogue tears.

“They wanted me to kill you, this was the only option,” Jason reveals, using his spare hand to open the front of his mask. “I-I couldn’t do it.”

“Why are you doing this, Jay?” you beg, sick of the mind games that he’s putting you through.

“Batman.” A wave of cold washes over you at his tone, riddled with a hatred you’ve never seen before. “He left me to die, (Y/N), he deserves to die for what he’s done.”

“Jay, he searched for you. We all did, but when we saw him shoot you, we thought you were dead,” you whisper, flinching as he leans closer to your face.

“You did find me, though, in Venezuela,” he growls, leaning closer until his helm digs into your skin. “Do you know how hard it was to let you leave? I couldn’t believe my girl finally found me.”

“What are you going to do now that you have me?” you ask, staring into his cold blue eyes. “Lock me away as you take over Gotham with your buddies?”

His eyes darkened at the suggestion. “I don’t want to lose you again.”

You shake your head, more tears escaping from your eyes, “I lost you, Jay, really lost you. I just got you back and you’re just going to do it all over again.”

He remains silent, unsure how to respond. Jay slowly leans in, his lips ghosting over yours before lightly kissing you. Your resolve shatters quickly, leaning into the kiss and giving in to your desires. You can’t lose him again.

He releases your hands, abandoning them to grasp your waist and yank you closer. The softness of the kiss disappears, desperation forcing the kiss to become feral. Both of you break away to breathe, taking each other in as you recover.

“Can we pretend, just for tonight, Kitty?” Jason asks, his eyes desperately pleading you to agree. “I can’t stop what’s in motion, but I’ll explain everything.”

Fuck it.

“Just for tonight, Birdy.”

[schraubd]

The Holocaust Was Not Summer School; Slavery Was Not Trade School.

Someone -- I can't find who -- once said, in relation to claims that Jews had "failed to the learn the lessons of Auschwitz", that "the Holocaust was not summer school."

The retort there was in relation to claims that Jews had not imbibed the correct moral sentiments following our genocide. But I was reminded of it upon hearing the recent defenses of Florida's "anti-woke" efforts to whitewash slavery by lauding the "skills" slaves allegedly acquired -- apologias which, unsurprisingly, have spilled over to Holocaust minimization as well.

Fox News star Greg Gutfeld, whose latest book debuted on Tuesday, is currently under fire over his recent observation that Jewish people “had to be useful” in order to survive concentration camps, prompting the Auschwitz Museum to rebuke his comments as an “oversimplification” of the Holocaust. 

[....] 

During Monday’s broadcast of Fox News’ The Five, which both Watters and Gutfeld co-host, the panel raged against Vice President Kamala Harris’ condemnation of the Florida curriculum as racist. Watters, for instance, blasted the veep for not wanting “African-Americans and white Americans to know that Black Americans did learn skills despite being enslaved.”

The heated discussion, however, took an uncomfortable turn when lone liberal panelist Jessica Tarlov drew a parallel between slavery and the Holocaust, wondering if Florida schools would also teach that Jewish people received some benefits from the Nazis systematically murdering them in death camps.

Gutfeld, referencing a famous book by Holocaust survivor Viktor Frankl, took Tarlov’s challenge and ran with it.

“Did you ever read Man’s Search for Meaning?” Gutfeld wondered. “Vik Frankl talks about how you had to survive in a concentration camp by having skills. You had to be useful. Utility! Utility kept you alive!”

The slide from "anti-CRT" to Holocaust trivialization is nothing new, of course. And here in particular we have one of those moments where an ounce of truth helps generate a ton of falsehood. It is true that, comparatively speaking, a Jewish inmate who had skills that happened to be useful for the Nazi war effort (or otherwise coveted by the local commander) was more likely to survive. Likewise, it's true that having enough wealth to pay for bribes actuarially increased one's life span compared to the destitute. It is not true that "utility kept you alive" (a phrase that is eerily adaptive of arbeit macht frei). Plenty of people with "utility" were murdered by the Nazis. It is not true that having money insulated Jews from the Nazis. Plenty of Jews with means were nonetheless rounded up and slaughtered. The relationship of "utility" to the Jewish experience in the camps was not one of moxie and grit overcoming incredible odds; anymore than the relationship of wealth was one of frugality and financial stewardship steering one to safety. There is no favor done to the oppressed that they can sometimes leverage opportunities to resist.

But again, this is the inevitable byproduct of the anti-woke panic. The obsession with never speaking forthrightly and honestly about oppression and discrimination -- always viewing it as a "both sides" initiative -- means one has to find ways to render Nazism, if not benign, then at least filed down. Others have written about the gentile obsession with telling feel-good Holocaust stories where plucky protagonists show their wiles and skills to secure a happy ending. This is a myth that non-Jews need to tell themselves to evade reckoning with the Holocaust in its full horror; the Holocaust did not come with happy endings.

And the same is true of slavery. Slavery was not a somewhat-unsavorily-run trade school. It was a form of White supremacist oppression. Trying to find the "happy endings" is an attempt to avoid reckoning with its horrors. And the thing is, if we actually took seriously the "nobody should be made to feel guilty based on the color of their skin" pablum, there'd be no quarrel with teaching the history in its full terrible glory. Learning of the horrors of slavery doesn't and shouldn't make White people feel guilty. The guilt comes from learning those facts and then wanting to carry on as before -- no change in affect, no change in politics, as if it never happened. The dissonance between the historical knowledge and the desire to pretend as if the history didn't happen or didn't matter -- that's what creates the guilt. But that's guilt based on one's own choices, and history class needn't and shouldn't have an interest in absolving you of that.

via The Debate Link https://ift.tt/LJUWduZ

[lawbin-archive]

The chemistry between Law & Robin

Yes, I'm talking about Lawbin's chemistry today.

Before you reading it, I have nothing against other ships. Law and Robin have chemistry with others as well. And I'm not comparing lawbin with any of them.

If you comment something like "[other ship] better" "I hate them" "even [a character] has more chemistry than them" "this ship is boring" etc., these kind of unreasonable, without proofs and rude comments. it's just proving that you are an immature and narrow-minded person that can't read or accept other opinion. Please respect each other and our personal space. I do welcome any other opinion with polite and civilized attitude.

If you are wondering why I need to set up a warning every time, it's because there are tons of annoying people in the internet.

I know I talked about their chemistry on twitter already, but I want to rant more about it lol so let's dive in.

Before everything, let's define chemistry. The definition of chemistry is "a quality that exists when two people understand and are attracted to each other" - from Cambridge dictionary So first of all, do Law and Robin understand each other?

In my opinion, yes and the first evidence is Robin can tell Law told the navy about green bit just by his face. and Law can also understand the danger of CP0. You might say they were just being investigative, observable and knowledgable. But that's the qualities you need to understand each other. In any relationship, you need to be communicative, have the same knowledge and observing each other emotions to understand each other.

Well, that's just the surface of understanding. Other than that, Law and Robin also have the same understanding on how hard is to learn the history (including void century and will of D). It's important to both of them because that's what Robin and Law dream of. Personally, I would say it's really difficult to find a person who has the same dream as you, understand how hard it is to archive and can archive with you. Especially, with all the Ohara's scholars eliminated and Robin searching poneglyph by herself for so long, she almost gave up and finally there is someone who has the same dream as her and can accompany her. I would say this is a very strong foundation of understanding and connections.

You might say, but she's already searching poneglyph with straw hats. But none of them really cares the history. Of course, it's important that the straw hats are supporting her and having her back. But only Law can fully understand her dream and know how hard it is. That's the special bonding they have.

Now that we know they have the same understanding on ponelgyph, isn't the underground Wano scenes more meaningful? Robin was searching poneglyph all by herself and now Law can accompany with her. All what Law did before defeating Doflamingo is to get revenge for Corazon, and now he finally found something he wants to do and he is interested with. And he's not achieving the goal by himself*.

*Note: Yes the straw hats helped him to defeat Doflamingo, but no one - I don't think even Robin knows the real reason. He has been taking all the responsibility and stress by himself. You can tell when he said he want to die with Luffy. That's how much burden he had. He didn't even want to involve the Heart pirates to begin with. To me, he's truly free and looking for what he's really interested after defeating Doflamingo.

side notes: Robin discovered ruins of Shandora by herself on the left panel, Robin and Law discovered ruins of underground Wano on the right panel. They both discovered in a square shaped tunnel, coincidence? On top of that, they have similar background and experience*. Why is this important? Because it makes them so easy to understand each other. They don't need to put themselves in each other's shoes to know how the person's feel. They have been through what each other been through. They already felt what each other felt. They can build connection instantly just by sharing their background. *I will make another post to talk about their similarities - it's kinda crazy to me how similar they are lol, but if you're interested what similarities they have, please read this.

Well Oda hasn't shown they know about each other experience yet, but Law already knew Robin can read poneglyph, with Law's personality and always updated with news, isn't hard for him to figure it out that she's the sole survivor of Ohara which is the same for him. Another thing is Law trusts Robin enough to tell her his real name. You might think is not a big deal, but Law is a distrusting person and it's a family secret, I don't think he would tell a potential future enemy his full name with so little of trust. [he was kinda threatened when he told Baby 5 & Buffalo, he only told Sengoku and Doflamingo he is a D*] Robin is the only member of straw hats that know his full name. *You might asked but Sengoku might be an enemy too, first he's retired, second he's the father figure for Corazon, that alone can let Law trust him enough to tell him the D and third he thinks he might know something about it. And for Doflamingo, I think he just wants to provoke him.

So they did build trust and bonding before he told her real name. It might be she saved him, it might be the alliance, it might also be they talked about their experience. Just one of my assumptions. Robin also told him she's also interested in the same thing. And here you go - they build an understanding and connection with their goals and dream.

Besides, they both have a similar dark humor. It's important to understand each other joke, right?

So they know each other have similar goals, similar background and similar personality. Isn't it really easy for them to understand each other and build bonding?

So, are they attracted with each other?

I would say maybe. Let's define what's attracted means. "If someone is attracted to someone else, he or she likes the other person or is interested in that person." - Cambridge dictionary Let's look at Law → Robin first, because I think that's a more obvious one. We talked about Law told Robin his real name which is something that drawn them closer. So that's one of the evidence. Another scene is when Law finds Robin in flower capital. Yes I'm brining it up again, because their conversation is so interesting.

Law said "You weren't with the others...so obviously I was suspicious." I found Law very cute here, because when did he get suspicious before? LOL From my memories, you can correct me if I'm wrong, Law never get suspicious to any straw hats for the entire alliance, and now he's getting "suspicious"? On top of that, straw hats were separated, Nami was having fun with Otama, Jimbei was having dinner by himself. There are tons of people in flower capital, he only notice Robin is missing and he's only "suspicious" about Robin.* He also searched the whole flower capital and the palace just to find her. I think that's a proof that he cares about her and her whereabouts. *You might say he followed her because of the poneglyph, I already explain it before so I'm not gonna repeat myself again. Please just refer to this post.

Also, when Robin crawled up on the tunnel. Law using his ability to switch places between him and something else. In the anime, it was Robin's sweat, but in the manga it's Robin's hair accessories. (the pop effect on Robin's head) Of course, it's really polite of him to not crawl behind Robin haha But how long did he look at Robin until she reached to the window and searching for something that he can switched place with.(I don't think he can shambles randomly at this point lol) That's also one of the reasons I think he's attracted to her - always paid attention to her and create proximity with her.

Let's talk about Robin → Law, I think Robin also shown she's interested to Law. As I mentioned above, she already told him she's also interested the meaning of D. I think talking about what you're interested is also a sign of you're interested to the person and willing to engage with them with the same hobby. Besides, Robin teased Law twice. The first one is in Dressrosa when she said "You have a sly look on your face." And the second time is the scene above when she said "I'm surprised you sniffed us out."* *Note that the original japanese text didn't indicate the subject in this sentence, but from their conversation, it's implied that Law only suspicious about Robin. I don't think he had interacted with Sukiyaki before lol

If I remember correctly, Robin rarely teasing other people except when she's interested. The only time I remember she teased someone is when she asked Luffy to let her join the crew which when she's interested in Luffy (non-romantically).* *again, I might be wrong, maybe there are other times. Other than that, I found it really cute when she said "No fair...". Robin rarely shown her childish (in a cute way), jealousy side of her. [I think when she said "No fair" means Law used his ability, kind of like jealous of his ability or he's cheating because she crawled all the way up] And it's interesting that she shown this playful side of her in front of him twice in this scene.

On top of that, Robin risked her body to save Law during Dressrosa. She was worrying about Law too. I think if it's someone you don't care, you won't worry or save them. If I really need to pull out another example, she didn't bother to help Bartolomeo when he was falling. But on the other side, she did care about Rebecca and saved her as well. (to provide different views) Also, Robin did worry about Law when she's under green bit and she was worrying about he's losing his arm.

I think it's pretty rare for Robin to worry about other guys outside of straw hats. And that might be a proof that she cared about Law and might attracted to him.

One piece rarely shown mutual romantic relationship, so it's surprised me that it's kinda hinting they are interested to each other especially the scenes in Wano. Although it's not obvious and not everyone sees it in that way, I think their relationship is cute regardless.

I actually found this post is really hard to write especially when you need to explain something that's a feeling and not something logical.

At the end, I think having chemistry or are they attracted to each other are really subjective to every one. Even though I pulled out definition, I think everyone has its own definition on chemistry. In my opinion, I think chemistry can appear in friendship, family or romantically. So if you only see their chemistry as platonic friends or comrade, I think that's totally reasonable. I'm not writing this to let everyone agrees with me. I just want to provide my perspective of their interactions. And personally, I like connections in emotionally & mentally more than physical intimacy, hence, why I like them.

It's really long post again, thank you for reading it. Again, I appreciate any opinion if you comment politely! :)

[thefrogdalorian]

The Best of Both Worlds - Chapter Three

Din Djarin x Female Reader Modern!AU

❁ Series Masterlist ❁ My Masterlist ❁ Read on AO3 ❁

Word Count: 8323 Rating: General Summary: Your internet bestie arrives in preparation for the Star Wars convention you will attend together. Everything is set for the greatest weekend of your life! Until you arrive at the con and find yourself overwhelmed by all the crowds and noise. At least you have numerous incredibly realistic Mando cosplays to distract you from how stressed you feel, and there's one in particular which is uncannily accurate... Content Warnings: Reader struggles to eat due to nerves and feels anxious due to crowds. Also, not sure if it's really a warning, but there's some allusions to fandom discourse in this one, particularly how men in the SW fandom can behave towards women. So warning for fandom wank, I guess, but reader goes off on them ;) Author's Note: A very long update, wow. Honestly, this chapter was semi-autobiographical lmao. It was my exact response to how busy SWC was last year, even down to hiding under the stairs! Except I did not have a cool internet bestie (just my uncool irl bestie), nor did I stand up and speak in a panel like reader does. I did however see many amazing cosplays and the picture of the Din cosplayer is one I took there! :) Hope you like this one. Not sure for how long me updating every two days will last, but my mind is fully focused on this story for the moment, so who knows! Thank you once again to the wonderful @suresnips for being my beta! Couldn't do it without you ♡

3. This Is Why (I Don't Leave The House) [Reader's POV]

You could scarcely believe that the person you had spent so many hours of your life gushing over The Mandalorian with online, was really here with you in your little flat. Ria had arrived a few hours ago and you two had instantly gotten along famously. Somehow, it was as though you had always known her, even though this was the first time you were actually meeting in person. 

You had left your flat earlier in the evening with a mix of trepidation in the pit of your stomach and overwhelming excitement crackling like electricity as it coursed through your veins. The prospect of finally meeting someone who meant so much to you was both daunting and exhilarating. There were so many things that could go wrong, since you had never spent any time together in person and were unsure of your dynamic in that sense. There was pressure, too, particularly bearing the distance Ria had travelled from the U.S. in mind, plus the money you had both spent on ForceCon tickets. 

It was a big deal for you to invite someone over to your flat to stay with you like this. From morning until evening, the two of you would be in each other’s presence constantly. At least it was only for five nights… Ria was leaving first thing Tuesday morning as you had to get straight back to work. You quieted your nerves with the thought of how brief her visit would be, until a notification lit up your phone and made your stomach drop:

[thisistheslay]: 18:36: I’M HEREEEEEE!!!! 

Ria must be here at the station. You searched around frantically for her, trying to spot her amongst all the commuters that were barreling through the station. You realised, then, that you had no idea how tall she was compared to your own height. That was something you had never needed to know online. Finally, you spotted the brown hair and thick black glasses that you instantly recognised as your internet best friend’s, making her way towards the barrier and the incredible weekend of nerdy fun that lay before the two of you.

After approximately five seconds of being in each other’s presence, you knew that all your fears were unfounded. 

As Ria had fumbled with her phone to make the contactless payment and make her way through the gates, the way her face had lit up at the sight of you instantly allayed your anxiety. The bone-crushing hug she had pulled you into had helped too, it was hard to believe she was actually here with you. This hug was for all of the hard days you had endured, separated by many miles when the two of you had just wished you could wrap the other in your arms and be there for them. 

It struck you how poised Ria was in real life, too. At the end of the day, the two of you shared a pretty nerdy hobby, it would have been understandable if she was quiet and a little nerdy. But here your internet best friend was, pushing her way through the busy rush hour crowds and throwing the death glares of the commuters, mainly old men in suits, who had glared at the two of you for daring to embrace in the middle of the station hall and block their way from making it to the next tube. 

It always baffled you to witness how eager people were to push and shove their way through others for the sake of arriving at their destination just two or three minutes earlier. Somewhere along the way, it felt as though a basic human kindness had been lost in how Londoners seemed to interact with each other when it came to public transport. 

But that was a gripe for another time. Your best friend was here, you would not let anyone ruin that. As you emerged from the station and onto the street, you found at a loss for what to say, other than asking about her flight. Luckily, Ria filled the gap in conversation by incessantly babbling about her travels here and the shady characters she had encountered during her two layovers, as she chatted all the way back to your flat. All the guilt you had felt at having her make her own way here – you had wanted to meet her at the airport but work had prevented you from getting away on time – vanished as you saw how much confidence she possessed. Her bubbliness was almost overwhelming, you could scarcely get a word in edgeways. But secretly you were glad of it; ordinarily you found that you were a little awkward in the presence of people you had just met as you adjusted to their presence and their energy. Ria more than compensated for your social shortcomings and fortunately, your dynamic appeared as though it would translate from online into the real world.

Ria burst into your flat after you had met her at the station, full of enthusiasm, lighting every corner of your abode with the warmth and humour that had always been present online. It was incredible how much energy she had actually, considering the fact she had just endured a transatlantic flight. You marvelled at her energy levels, considering you felt exhausted after merely going to the shops. It was so amazing to have her here with you, though. 

You had laughed before meeting her about how bizarre it was that internet friends always seemed to know the most intimate details about your life, in a way that you never felt comfortable sharing with real life friends… but you had never seen each other’s legs! Yet, now Ria was here, legs and all. 

The two of you were inflating the air mattress for Ria to sleep on, keen to get an early night after so much travelling and how early the two of you would need to be up to make your way to the Dockside Convention Centre for the Con the following morning. You positioned the air mattress underneath the TV, on which you had just spent hours watching your favourite episodes of the show that had brought the two of you together. Of course, you had only intended to watch one episode. But with Mando, there was no such thing as only one episode. Once you started, you just couldn’t stop and you had ended up watching most of the second season. Both you and Ria agreed that the second half of it was incredible, but it was a bit of a slow start. Overall the pair of you preferred the first season, which was a pretty popular consensus amongst fans.

Ria had no qualms about her sleeping arrangements. London was an extortionate city at the best of times, but accommodation when ForceCon was in town – especially close to the convention centre – had meant that your offer to allow Ria to stay in your flat was the only way she had been able to afford to come. It was a debt to you that Ria was grateful for. You didn’t see it as any kind of debt though, you knew she would do the same for you. 

Plus, there was no way you could not offer to help her. If something as ridiculous as actually encountering Mando happened, she would never be able to forgive you if she was not by your side.

Ria had always been your closest friend since you had first met her online and you were so relieved that there had been no hint of awkwardness between the two of you. Ria had made herself right at home, and you had struggled to believe as the chatter and laughter continued that this was genuinely the first time the two of you had ever met in person. 

You watched in awe as Ria moved around your flat, her brown hair which she usually wore in a bob, now tied up ready to sleep. The glasses with thick-black frames were still on her face, a sure sign she would be scrolling on her phone, probably replying to people on her wildly popular blog, before she finally got some sleep. 

Now that she had changed into the tank top and shorts that she would sleep in, you could see more of the extensive tattoo collection she possessed, including a few Mandalorian tattoos. There was an outline of Mando’s helmet that was so well-done, it made you want to rush out to the nearest tattoo shop and get one for yourself. You knew there would be tattoo artists at the Con too, but you also knew you would inevitably chicken out.

With her confident nature and collection of tattoos, you were both in awe of, and utterly intimidated by your best friend. You thought, as you watched her climb onto the air mattress with a giggle, as it tossed her around, that Ria seemed so much older than you even though she was actually eighteen months younger! But that was the bizarre thing about being in your mid twenties, people either seemed to be fully formed adults or still more like teenagers. There was rarely any inbetween. 

You shouldn’t have been surprised that the two of you had gotten along so well. After all, you and Ria shared a similar sense of humour, had a similar taste in music (that wasn’t the Mandalorian soundtrack) and a love of books that had allowed your friendship to blossom into something more than purely an entirely Mando-centric friendship that you felt like you shared with some of your other online friends. It wasn’t as though the friendships were shallow or that you didn’t get on with them or anything, but you had just not spoken more deeply about other parts of your lives in the same way as you had to Ria.

“How’s the air mattress?” You asked with a smirk as you watched Ria toss and turn as the unpredictable surface tossed her around.

“It’s fine! Just a bit lively but honestly now I’m lay down, it’s super comfortable. I’ll be asleep in no time,” Ria smiled.

“Good,” You nodded. “Still can’t believe you’re really here. I thought about this moment for months but now it’s actually here, it’s surreal,”

“I can’t believe I’m here either. In this flat, which I’ve seen so many times on FaceTime. It feels so weird in the best way!” Ria laughed. “We’re going to have the best time this weekend.”

“We are. It’ll be incredible,” You breathed, trying to contain your excitement so that you would actually be able to get some sleep. The thought of being surrounded by so many fellow Star Wars nerds was electrifying.

“And don’t forget that panel tomorrow, when we finally meet Mando!” Ria exclaimed. “I’m sure he’s going to fall in love with me at first sight.”

“In your dreams, Ria,” You rolled your eyes playfully. “Goodnight, see you bright and early in the morning.”

“Goodnight bestie, I need to get my beauty sleep for Mando,” Ria added with a wink.

You shook your head with a grin on your face as you made your way into your bedroom, still utterly bemused by Ria’s utter conviction that the two of you were somehow going to encounter the man who was sworn to complete secrecy. You kind of admired Ria’s utterly unshakable confidence in the matter, even if it was a little delusional. At the end of the day, though, you knew it was all lighthearted. She wasn’t the type of person to try to hack into CCTV cameras or bribe the doctors and nurses at the hospital where a suspiciously-realistic cosplayer had surprised sick children. Ria loved The Mandalorian a great deal, but she also had other hobbies and interests. 

As you tried your best to convince your body that it really needed to sleep before the Con tomorrow, you were struck by how surreal this all felt. Tomorrow, you would travel to what would become, for the next few days, the nerd centre of the world. It was an event that you had dreamt of going to for years, where all of the latest Star Wars projects were announced. Yet, you had never imagined it would be possible to attend, due to how expensive a trip abroad would be. Luckily though, ForceCon travelled around regularly and the stars had aligned to make this possible for you. When it had been announced that the next one would be held in London, you knew you had to do whatever it took to be there.

After almost an entire year of anticipation, you knew that in just a few short hours you would be there, at the event where everyone who was anyone in the Star Wars world and the people who admired them were to be found. 

There was just one exception, though. Mando would never get to see how much the fans appreciated him. Keeping his identity a secret meant that he would never be able to feel the amount of love that fans held for him. Your heart constricted as you thought about it. Even though you had tried in vain to convince yourself that you didn’t really care that much about not knowing who he was, you thought it sad that the man, who was so beloved by people young and old, might never know how truly appreciated he was. You just hoped that one day, on his own terms, he would allow himself to feel some of it. 

It was a thought that lulled you off into sleep, underneath the large poster of Season One that hung above your single bed.

The familiar sound of the opening theme to The Mandalorian jolted you awake. With its rhythmic drum beat and melodic bass recorder, it was really the perfect alarm. What wasn’t so perfect, however, was the ungodly hour at which it had interrupted the peaceful slumber you were enjoying. You fumbled around, bleary-eyed in the early-morning light as your hand felt around the nightstand to turn it off, frustrated at being awoken. Until you remembered precisely why you were awake at five in the morning.

For a second you lay there and closed your eyes, attempting to compose yourself and stop the fluttering in your stomach as the realisation dawned upon you: It was ForceCon day!

Finally, after months and months of anticipation, you would finally get to have one of the best weekends of your life. The big day was finally here and you and Ria did not want to miss a single second of time there, hence the early start. The venue for the Con, the Dockside Convention Centre, was a considerable distance from the outskirts of the city where you lived in your rented flat, which somehow fell within your budget despite how close it was to the tube station. 

The journey to the convention centre was even further than your daily commute to the museum where you worked. The thought of a journey that would take upwards of an hour to start your day, before you had even contended with the crowds at the convention, was slightly distressing to you. But you knew that with Ria by your side, there was no doubt that you would be able to get through it.

Getting up at five meant that you had ample time to get ready for the event. Your outfit was comfortable and practical but still showed your nerdy side. It had been somewhat of a project for you in the run up to the convention, with a denim jacket that you had walked past in a shop window and fell in love with, decorated with various iron-on patches that were a nod to your favourite characters. You coupled it with a comfortable pair of black jeans that weren’t too tight – a must when doing as much walking as you were about to do this weekend – and your trusty favourite pair of shoes. 

You wandered into the main room of your flat, quietly watching as Ria sat on the small couch and expertly applied the finishing touches to her make-up. Suddenly, she snapped the handheld mirror shut and turned to face you.

“Are you ready for the greatest weekend of our lives?!” Ria asked enthusiastically.

“Yes… but no… but yes!” You exclaimed, still unsure how to process the rush of emotions that you were feeling about the day ahead.

“Let me just fill my water bottle up and then I’m ready,” Ria said as she jumped up from the couch and grabbed the titanium bottle that was covered with various Star Wars characters.You chuckled at that. Despite how effortlessly cool your friend seemed to most people, even you, it was reassuring to know that at heart, Ria was still a nerd.

After one last check that you both had your passes for the event, you grabbed the backpacks you had carefully packed the previous evening, between episodes of The Mandalorian, and headed out, to where a weekend of nerd heaven awaited. 

Waking up so early had meant that the two of you could take your time getting ready and then head out to the convention before the main rush hour began on the tube. Much as you loved your sleep and wanted to feel well-rested, being able to avoid the worst of the crowds was a deeply appealing prospect. Plus, you would have a chance to stop for breakfast closer to the convention hall and eat food that wasn’t horrendously overpriced. 

But as you sat there, staring at the sandwich you had ordered and barely taken a few bites of, you seemed to have a mental block when it came to actually finishing the thing. You wanted to, you knew you needed to get some food in your body to give yourself the fuel for contending with the crowds at the convention. Try as you might, though, your mind was not onboard.

“Too nervous?” Ria asked with a knowing smirk as she munched on some fruit.

“I guess,” You shrugged, feeling as though your stomach had tied itself into knots and was attempting to strangle itself. 

“You can always bring it with you. We’ll probably have to get in line and wait around for a while before we go inside. Perhaps you’ll feel like eating then,” Ria suggested.

“Yeah, good idea,” You smiled, suddenly feeling immensely relieved that you had someone else here with you. “I don’t know how I’d do this without you, Ria. Thank you.”

The two of you left the cafe with your takeout coffee cups and finally headed towards the convention centre. As you made your way towards the crowds of people, your stomach dropped as you noticed just how busy things were going to be. For the first few hundred feet, things weren’t too bad as you were sent down what appeared to be a wide, service road, built into the side of the convention centre with the masses of people who were all heading in the same direction as you.

You stuck to the side of the walkway, where you could see the roads and city below, and feel the fresh air on your face over the barrier that bordered one side of the walkway. As long as you could still see daylight and the crowds were moving, you were fine. Slightly stressed, but you could cope. 

However, the sight that greeted you at the end of the walkway was like something from your worst nightmares. It was your first glimpse inside the packed convention hall, where you had been so certain that you would have the greatest weekend of your life. But if it involved walking into something as stressful as the sight before you, you were not so sure that it would be the incredible experience you had built it up to be in your head.

As far as you could see, in the biggest room you had ever stepped foot in, there was an endless sea of people. The space was enormous and industrial, with a black floor and white sliding doors at the far left end that opened sporadically to let attendees into the main hall. You felt sick as you looked at it, you couldn’t survive more than a few minutes in that space, especially without knowing how long you would be there for. But no one you encountered appeared to have any idea as to how long you would be in this space. You were just glad that you had arrived a little before the doors to the con opened.

You had expected that, given that ForceCon was officially endorsed by Lucasfilm, it would at least be professionally organised. Instead, though, it seemed as though there were a small number of stressed out volunteers responsible for herding the attendees into a series of pens, with no security or leadership in sight. The poor workers looked incredibly stressed and overwhelmed by the influx of people.

“Ria, I don’t know if I can do this.” You mumbled when you noticed the crowd of people that you were being swept towards as the volunteers motioned for you to fill one of the pens. It seemed as though it would never end, as far as your eyes could see there were people. You felt panic rising in your chest, how were you ever going to get out of here?

“Just breathe, bestie. Breathe.” Ria said, placing her hand upon your back soothingly. “This won’t last forever, it’ll all be worth it. Think about the Mando cosplays! Look, there’s one over there!”

But it was no use. Not even the greatest Mandalorian cosplay in the galaxy would be able to comfort you now. Panic was rising in your chest, you felt overwhelmed by being stuck between two metal barriers in a pen full of people.

You tried your best to focus on her words as you took a seat on the cold, hard floor of the hall. The buzzing in your head was back, it grew louder and louder. You shut your eyes and stared at the floor, hands covering your ears as you willed time to go faster.

“Won’t be long now. I promise,” Ria said reassuringly.

How was she always so calm and composed when you felt as though the world was ending over a few people in a room together? It seemed almost unfair. But you knew that Ria would not want you to feel bad, she just wanted to make sure that you were going to be alright.

Mercifully, before too long, the con opened and you eventually began to move out of the enormous room. At that moment, you felt excitement bubbling up in the pit of your stomach as it dawned on you that you were about to enter Star Wars heaven. You glanced for the first time at the various incredible cosplays that surrounded you, in awe of the hours each person had dedicated to their craft.

Any relief you felt was short-lived, though. The main hallway was not much better. You couldn’t move, or stop to think. The crowd continued plodding down the hall towards a destination unknown. You were sure it was the busiest place you had ever been in your entire life. 

“Just keep swimming, swimming,” You chanted to yourself under your breath as a way to soothe yourself. 

You took deep breaths and concentrated on the rhythmic thudding of your feet as you stared up the ceiling and continued on your way. You instantly felt lighter, the beginnings of a smile traced across your features when you looked up and saw a giant poster of Mando hanging from the ceiling. If you could just make it to him, you would be most of the way down the corridor and then you would almost be at your destination: the main hall.

Focusing on the Mando poster helped and before you knew it, you were there, surrounded by a dizzying variety of stalls selling more Star Wars merch than you had ever seen gathered together in one place in your entire life. You thought you had a pretty impressive collection yourself – having a proper, adult salary had made it easier to give into your whims and purchase a variety of collectibles – but this was really something else. 

You were like a kid in a candy shop, mouth open as you wandered from stall to stall, taking in the wares of the various vendors. You felt like Mando the first time he visited Tatooine. He had wandered around just like you were, amazed by the variety of produce on display. Unlike Mando, though, you were unable to get even remotely close to the stalls. There was a throng of people gathered at each one. You were not the least bit assertive in crowds, you had no desire to engage in a battle with your elbows through a gaggle of fellow nerds for some slightly-overpriced collectibles.

“Shall we find somewhere to sit and catch our breath before the panel?” Ria asked, sensing your discomfort. For someone that you had only met face-to-face the previous evening, she was more perceptive than some people who had known you for years.

You headed out of the main hall, desperate to find any relief from the overwhelming noises and sounds that the thousands of people crammed inside the Dockside Convention Centre were currently creating. The first place that you noticed was a staircase. You ducked under the metal bar that surrounded the bottom of it and flopped down unceremoniously on the floor, finally feeling your nerves begin to settle as there was a physical barrier between you and the rest of humanity for the time being. Things suddenly felt a lot quieter and more manageable as the buzzing in your head began to subside. Ria sat opposite you, her blue eyes looking into yours concernedly.

“Ria, I’m sorry I’m such a nervous wreck. It’s just… it’s so much busier than I was expecting.” You admitted.

“Girl, shut up. This place is crazy. Like, the craziest place I have ever been in my entire life. I suffer with this shit too.” Ria admitted. “I think I’m just running on, like, the adrenaline of thinking about Mando being at that panel.” 

“Ria, he’s not going to be at the panel!” You laughed. “Please stop being delusional!” 

“Sure, there he is right now!” Ria giggled breathlessly as she pointed towards the main hallway, which had emptied somewhat since you had fought your way through it just a few minutes ago.

You had fully intended to make another jibe about Ria being delusional, but when you turned your head, the sight caused all coherent thoughts to leave your brain. You were transfixed at the sight before you. It was as though you had suddenly been transported a long time ago to a galaxy far, far away. The most incredible cosplay you had ever laid eyes upon was heading straight towards you. The armour itself was immaculate, the details on it really looked as if they were forged out of Beskar by a Mandalorian armourer. Of course you knew that screen realistic cosplays existed, you had obviously seen the viral footage of a Mando cosplayer visiting a children’s hospital a few months ago. But it was more than the armour that made your entire world pause on its axis. It was the way this cosplayer carried himself: the self-assured, confident swagger that you would recognise anywhere. The way his hands were held at his side, somewhere between relaxed and tensed, ready to put his finger on the trigger at a moment’s notice. For one brief, fleeting second: you could have sworn that the real Mando was actually walking towards you.

“Wow… that’s…” You stuttered, failing to find words that could capture your feelings towards the sight before you. 

“Um, excuse me! I’m the one who gets called delusional and obsessed with Mando, but look at you!” Ria said with a knowing smirk, clearly where words had failed… your face had betrayed you. “You’re getting flustered over a cosplay!”

You couldn’t even deny it. You were feeling more than a little flustered. It was the first time you had ever seen a Mandalorian in real life. Nothing could have prepared you for it, the presence that the man had, even from this distance. Watching the way he carried himself as he had swaggered down the main hallway had been intoxicating to behold. It was also the way with his T-visor, that you never knew exactly where his eyes were trained. They could be right on you or they could be looking right past you, you would never know. As far as you were concerned, he had picked you out from the crowd, his eyes focusing on you and only you as he walked down the hall. It was an electrifying thought, you felt little bolts of electricity all over your skin. You had half a mind to run up to him and beg him to bring you in warm or cold, he could decide, you really weren’t fussy. 

“Hellooooooo, bestie!” Ria said sarcastically, waving her hand in front of your eye line, which was still trailed off into the distance where the cosplayer had disappeared into the crowd. “Anyone home?” 

“Sorry.” You said, shyly. Now that the Mando cosplay had walked past, you had sadly realised that he was not making a bee-line for you to sweep you off your feet, you felt a little embarrassed. “I just couldn’t stop staring. That was an amazing cosplay.” 

“It was. Or maybe… it was really him!” Ria said, throwing her arms like a conspiracy theorist gif that your groupchat had sent one too many times. 

You both collapsed into full belly laughter at that. Ria was so devoted to the bit at this point that you just went along with it. You silently called a truce: you would stop calling her delusional, it was a fun joke that had distracted your anxious brain from the throngs of people that surrounded you, just beyond the metal railing of your refuge under the stairs. Despite the distraction, they had not magically disappeared.

“The Mando panel isn’t for a couple hours yet. Is there anything you want to do beforehand?” Ria asked, once the two of you had finally stopped laughing. 

“Uh. I don’t know. We could go and have a look around, find where the stages are maybe and then have lunch?” You suggested, not feeling like working your way through the hordes of people by the stalls again. 

So Ria and you did exactly that, getting your bearings and orienting yourself in the massive convention hall. There seemed to be so much to see and do, you were so grateful in that moment that you had splurged on four day passes. It would probably take you four days to walk around the entire thing! Your exploration of the centre meant that by the time the panel came around, you were grateful that you would be able to sit down, you were more than ready to rest your tired, achy legs. 

As you made your way into the room where the panel would be held, you went out of your way to thank the staff on the door. You knew most of the people who worked here were volunteers and a lot of the panel goers were looking straight through them. Manners cost nothing though, a simple “thanks” and a smile and nod were enough to make someone feel valued when they perhaps felt as though they were doing a thankless task. You couldn’t understand why more people wouldn’t take just two seconds to say thank you.

Your heart was thundering as you took a seat in the hall. For a strange moment, you felt as though you were back in a lecture at University. Everyone sizing each other up, wondering where to sit – should they leave a gap or get close to others, maybe strike up a conversation? Personally, you wanted to place as much distance between yourself and others as humanly possible and the thought of speaking to strangers made you freeze up in terror. But Ria, ever the extrovert, was quite happy to strike up a conversation with the guys next to you. 

They were fans of Mando, but you could tell pretty quickly that they were casuals. They did not have the deeper love for the show that you and Ria held. After a few minutes of sitting around, the people who were hosting the panel emerged, walking down the gap between the neatly-arranged chairs to take a seat on the long table that sat on a raised platform so everyone in the room was able to get a good view of them. The room was long but narrow and you and Ria were sitting around 10 rows back. As you glanced behind you, you realised that it had filled up rather quickly. You were glad that you had been here well ahead of the scheduled start time to ensure you got a good seat.

The guys running the panel began messing around with their laptops so they could get the powerpoint they had created on the screen. They were certainly not what you were expecting for this panel. You had expected it to be on a bigger stage, with more fanfare. But it was actually just a small panel hidden away at the back of the convention centre, up a flight of stairs that people might have missed. You had wondered, momentarily, whether you should get up and leave… Yet something was telling you to remain seated and stay. Just because it hadn’t been what you were expecting, didn’t necessarily mean it was going to be a bad thing. The audience seemed to be friendly too, a combination of people who you hoped would ask some thought-provoking questions and wouldn’t turn this all into baseless speculation over who the actor behind Mando really was.

When it got started, though, it soon transpired that this was not going to be the discussion you thought it was. The guys running the panel were sharing their views about Mando as though it was one of the online Star Wars podcasts that you avoided like the plague. There was little room for audience participation. The chair of the panel, a man with a backwards baseball cap on, which was slightly cringeworthy considering he must have been pushing fifty, was called Jeff. 

Jeff was very American, thrashing his limbs around exaggeratedly, imitating Mando’s fight style as his voice got quicker and higher pitched in enthusiasm for the tough warrior. Jeff and his colleagues were definitely the kind of people who watched The Mandalorian just to see him fight bad guys and kill them in cool, new ways. Obviously you enjoyed that too, but there was really so much more to the show and the character than just fighting. You wished that they could see that too, especially considering they were running a damn panel about it!

You were so utterly tuned out by their incessant ramblings that you turned your head towards the back of the room to indulge in a bit of people watching. Principally, to see if the two guys on your row that Ria had chatted to before the panel began were as bored as you were. It seemed that even they were utterly uninterested in Jeff and his buddies. You found that your relative boredom was mirrored on the expressions of numerous others in the room who were just as unenthused by Jeff and co’s surface-level analysis of the show you all loved. You felt at that moment that if you and Ria had somehow been able to lead a panel it would have been much more exciting.

You would have actually introduced some nuance and character analysis as the title of the panel had suggested would happen. Ria’s wild theory that this would be the place that Mando would reveal himself to the world had soon gone out of the window, too. Out of all the places in the world that he could choose (or not) to finally reveal his identity, a room tucked away in the far corner of the Dockside Convention Centre did not seem the most likely.

But your stomach dropped in the familiar way that it had when you were crouched underneath the staircase, catching your breath after the bedlam of entering the Con. 

It was him. 

The same cosplayer was back. 

He was sitting on the last seat in the row, two rows behind and opposite you, perfectly straight with his shoulders back, hands resting on his knees. It was almost uncanny, the way he held himself… it was so much like the way you had witnessed Mando sit so many times on the show. When he visited cantinas or sat in his ship, Mando held himself in an uncannily similar position.

You shook your head, mentally telling yourself to snap out of it – you were being ridiculous! If Ria was thinking these thoughts, you would tell her to stop being crazy. You were usually the grounded, rational one. For even you to be getting caught up in such delusional thinking, well that was truly concerning. Perhaps it was thanks to the early start and crowds. Either way, it seemed as though you were really losing it. 

You blamed it on Mando, all logical thought went straight out of your brain when it came to him. Of course the best Mando cosplayers would be here at this con. It wasn’t really him, but it sure was uncanny how realistic both the cosplay and way he sat was. Extremely uncanny. You didn’t have time to dwell on it, though… because Jeff was asking a question to the audience. One that you were keen to answer honestly and defend the character that you loved so much, with as much ferocity as if he was really listening to your every word.

“So, finally, we wanted to leave a few minutes for discussion about what the character of Mando means to all of you, here. You must be pretty big fans of the show to have found us all the way back up here!” Jeff joked, to a few laughs from the room.

You had gotten the sense since you had walked into this panel that Jeff and his buddies viewed everyone here with a baseline level of contempt. It was something that you couldn’t quite place your finger on, but you felt as though if a person did not entirely agree with his point of view, then he was not impressed by them.It was a shame, really, you loved hearing the opinions of others. Even if you didn’t agree with them, you always found out something new about yourself. 

Jeff had only just finished speaking, and already there was a steady stream of people flocking to queue at the microphone positioned in the aisle. There was nothing on earth that could motivate you to go up there, so you sat, with your arms folded, and leaned back into your chair. This would all be over in a few minutes. Then there would be a hopefully much more interesting panel about historical parallels with Star Wars, something you were truly interested in, that you wanted to check out with Ria. 

The first few audience comments were pretty dull. You disagreed with all of them almost entirely as they again reduced the concept of understanding a character to things such as seeing a face and knowing a name. Jeff just responded hollowly, thanking the speakers for their thoughts. But it did not provoke any deeper discussions like you had been hoping for. 

That was certainly a disappointment, but it was not a reason for you to lose your temper. You just felt slightly numb to the whole experience, wishing it was over as soon as possible and already plotting your route to the next panel. It was dull, but inoffensive.

That was, until the next two speakers boiled your blood with their assumptions and cruel jibes.

“When I first started watching The Mandalorian I loved it. I really thought Star Wars was back!” A man in a Darth Vader hoodie, who was probably in his late thirties, said proudly as he echoed the empty talking points that you had heard over and over since The Mandalorian premiered. You scoffed and rolled your eyes. This guy was clearly someone who thought that Star Wars was all bad now. He probably bought into all the theories that his precious sci-fi franchise had been ruined by women. He continued his tirade: “But now, it’s just the same thing every week. A hollow, emotionless tin can man strutting around from planet to planet, taking guys out. Like, it was cool the first few times but it’s just getting boring now. We need to see his face!” 

Your blood was slowly boiling as you heard all of these hollow criticisms of the show you loved so much. It truly upset you that a place you had believed would be full of fellow fans who would be eager to enthuse about the show alongside you and Ria had been nothing of the sort. Instead of the welcoming, open-minded environment you had expected, things had been wildly different, as the next speaker was about to prove once again. 

The next man who spoke had long brown hair. He was dressed in a Mando t-shirt and jeans. 

“I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love the show and all. But I just feel like we don’t know that much about Mando. It’s as if we, as an audience, are being held back from connecting with him fully because of some diva’s selfish demands to keep his identity hidden!” The man exclaimed. Several people laughed and applauded. He was probably around your age but it stunned you how drastically different your opinions on the show could be. Perhaps he spent his time online in different circles than you. In fact, you were almost certain that you had seen these conspiracy theories about Mando’s actor pushed by people who swore it as the gospel truth, even though there was absolutely no proof of it. But he was not done yet, levelling a final cruel jab at the actor who played Mando: “Seriously, the guy who plays him must be such an asshole. Imagine having to work with that guy!” 

Your head was burning… that was too much. Once people got personal about the actor too, that did it for you. It was one thing to criticise the show, but to level insults towards the person behind the character, who clearly did not want his business in the public eye, was enough to compel you to speak up. 

Before you really knew what you were doing, you had somehow risen from your seat, stumbled over a few bags and outstretched legs and now stood in front of the microphone. Jeff looked at you expectantly, the eyes of everyone in the room were on you. Suddenly the gravity of what you were about to do had dawned on you, you felt your pulse thundering in your ears. But then you remembered what the previous guy had said about Mando, and you opened your mouth to launch into a passionate defence of your favourite fictional character of all time.

“I think tying Mando’s identity to his name and face is a pretty narrow way of viewing how we can understand who someone truly is inside and what exactly motivates them. I mean, I think I’ve connected to his character pretty well without ever seeing his face or knowing his real name. That’s because Mando has proved time and time again what kind of man he is. The way he has risked his life multiple times to rid the galaxy of threats and evil shows that he is committed to securing a brighter future, even if he is not around to see it. This man is willing to sacrifice himself for the greater good. Sure, we don’t know his name or face or a lot about his origins, but I think to us, that should prove that he has nothing but noble intentions. That human side of the man beneath all of the armour allows us to connect to him on a far deeper level than just seeing a face and learning a name ever could.”

Jeff began to thank you for your thoughts, using the same hollow phrases that he had used for every previous speaker, but you were not done yet. For the reason you had stood up to speak was not only motivated by the way people had spoken about Mando, the character. It was not just accusations against the fictional man that you were here to refute, but also the way that they had tried to turn on the man beneath the Beskar.

“Also, I know no one outside this room will probably ever hear what had been said at this panel, but I think attacking the character of the man who portrays Mando, simply because he wants privacy, is unfair. I think we should always talk about people, online and publicly, as though they can read or hear what we say. We don’t know why he won’t say who he is, but I trust that he has his reasons. Even then, he doesn’t need to have a good reason,” You argued passionately, noticing how the trembling in your voice had ceased the more you spoke. “Everyone is entitled to their privacy for the simple fact of wanting to be private. I just think that we see Mando go from planet to planet, connecting with locals and communicating with them respectfully. He leaves every place better than he found it… I wish more people would take those lessons from the show, too, rather than how skilled Mando is at fighting and killing,” You made a pointed effort to look straight at Jeff as you made that last quip about his fighting skills, but he just stayed slumped in his seat, hand resting under his chin, looking utterly bored. Your words had done nothing to get through to him.

You walked back to your seat, head down, trembling. Speaking that much in public had been a lot more than you would ever have expected yourself to be able to handle. Ria was staring at you dumbfounded, her mouth open in shock.

“Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?” Ria asked, astonished.

“I… uh….” You stuttered.

“Look, I knew you loved Mando, but that was insane!” Ria whispered excitedly, while beaming at you. “You defended him as if he was a real person, like he was actually here in the room! That was awesome, beyond badass! He’d be so proud of you, bestie.”

“Thank you.” You whispered, face suddenly feeling hot. You were sure you were visibly shaking after your public outburst. But it had been worth it, you had meant every word.

A few more people offered their thoughts but your head was still buzzing with the emotional exertion of public speaking, so you did not pay them much mind, even if they still repeated the same old tired arguments about Mando that you had just tried to argue against. 

Finally, Jeff drew things to a close and then it was time for everyone to leave. He had invited people to come and speak to him at the front after the panel if they wished to, but you were definitely not going to be taking him up on that offer. You had believed that anyone given such an incredible opportunity to speak about something they loved at an event as prestigious as ForceCon would be nothing less than delighted. But clearly, you were mistaken. Jeff had seemed utterly bored throughout the panel, not least when people he did not agree with had spoken. You were not a fan of him and his backwards baseball cap in the slightest. 

As the panel ended and people began to filter out, you glanced around to where the incredible cosplayer had been sitting. But it seemed that while you had been distracted by your emotional state after speaking so publicly, he had already made his way out. You were disappointed, you wanted to compliment him on his cosplay and maybe even get a picture with him.

Just being in his presence twice had been intoxicating, you had been unable to look away from him. When you saw him, it really felt like you were actually in the world of The Mandalorian. You had a strong desire to be near him again, but you were too late. The man was apparently long gone. But you didn’t want to dwell on that and ruin the rest of your experience. You still had three more days here. So it was time to get over your disappointment, even though you were still kicking yourself for not pointing him out to Ria.

As you made your way down to the main hall of the convention centre, you couldn’t help but feel your chest swell with pride when you remembered how you had spoken in such a surprisingly eloquent manner at the panel. It had really been so many steps out of your comfort zone, but you had proved to yourself that you could do it. This entire weekend, really, was out of your comfort zone. But so far, you were matching every hurdle before you. 

Perhaps speaking up at the panel would be the start of a new, more confident you. A you that was unafraid to stand up for what she believed in.

But then, the idea of a simple panel at a sci-fi convention being some sort of life changing experience was surely an absurd notion.

Wasn’t it?

Next Chapter

Taglist: @toxic-seduction

[fivedayslater]

Like Fine Wine: An Informal Study of Zoro/Sanji Side Pairings

I've been curious about which side pairings crop up the most alongside ZoSan, so I decided to look into it the only way I know how: AO3 tag usage

Come on this journey with me

Since people tag side pairings in either the Additional Tags section using the format Minor [Ship Tag] and in the Relationship Tags section alongside the main relationship pretty evenly, I decided the best way to go about this was to get both numbers and add them together. The way I got these numbers was by searching AO3 for works tagged with Roronoa Zoro/Sanji in the Relationship section and Minor [Ship Name] in the Additional Tags section, then with both Roronoa Zoro/Sanji and [Ship Name] in the Relationship section.

I am aware that this meant that I a) counted fics that were tagged in both the Relationship and Additional Tags sections twice, and b) counted those giant one-shot collections that tag every single ship featured even if they're only in one chapter (derogatory), which aren't quite what I'm looking for, but even so I feel this was the best way to go about it given the tools at my disposal.

As for which pairings to search, I went to the experts, aka Zoro/Sanji fic readers. I took suggestions from here, the ZoSan Club discord server, Twitter, and BlueSky. I also added the top 50 or so l tagged One Piece ships on AO3 that didn't involve Zoro or Sanji to see how they compared overall.

(Poly ships were excluded because most tagging on them also includes tagging every combination in the poly ship, and would have skewed the data)

It should also be noted that because of how this method functions, I also would have counted fics where Zoro/Sanji is tagged in the Relationships section, but is only a side pair to the main pairing. I deemed this acceptable, as the point of this quest is to see which ships go the most with Zoro/Sanji, and them being the side pairing counts. It also means that fics with these side pairings that don't have them tagged at all weren't counted, but there's not much I can do about that.

The results of all this?

Most everyone on every platform agreed that Franky/Robin, Nami/Vivi, Usopp/Kaya, and Luffy/Law were the most common. And the numbers agree:

(purple is for the assumed top ships, green is for suggested ships, and blue is for AO3's top ships)

Here's everything broken down by which tags were searched:

Here's the breakdown of what my Panel Of Experts (the people who replied) like to see alongside ZoSan:

And here's the breakdown AO3's top ships

What have we learned from this:

The pairings most popular with Zoro/Sanji tend to feature Straw Hats (Franky, Robin, Luffy, Nami, Usopp), or people who would reasonably be around the Straw Hats in an AU (Ace, Mihawk, Law, Sabo)

We as a community really need to standardize how we tag side ships. Considering writing up a Best Practices post. Will keep you posted

When everyone agrees, that's probably the right answer

I think Law/Luffy beating out Franky/Robin on the Relationship tags has to do with there simply being more Law/Luffy fic. It doesn't appear as a side pairing as much, but is often a main pairing alongside Zoro/Sanji, and a lot of Law/Luffy centric fics have Zoro/Sanji as a side pair

Doflamingo is very popular to ship around for some reason? He's in like 5 of the top 10 ships

Law is too, but like. I get that

Sabo too! Everyone really likes throwing Sabo at people

You are all so right about Kuina/Sabo though

There are pairings that made the list like Killer/Penguin and Crocodile/Dragon that I assume are very popular side pairings in like Kid/Law and Luffy centric fics, but don't have a lot of showing in Zoro/Sanji fic

More studies could be done into more specific breakdowns within each side pairing, and how often Zoro/Sanji appears as a side pairing with the other ship as a main pairing, but I don't want to. Maybe later

Mostly what I learned is that i have way too much time on my hands 👍

Still, maybe some of you are interested in the results too, in which case, you're welcome :)

[veeepawoon]

Some theories about Compress' character and past

SPOILERS AHEAD

.

.

.

.

.

.

The end of the manga is near, he was shown looking particularly sad in the panel with Geten. If you think about that it's kinda weird that he has that expression when he's usually sarcastic and arrogant even in bad situations.

I know that he wore the mask during 99.9% of the manga but idk, I don't think he has ever shown that much emotion. C'mon look at him, he looks like a small puppy who didn't get his treat😭

I have this theory that he is actually a sad person with a sad past and "hides it" behind his sarcastic villain persona, the "mask" metaphorically speaking.

THAT'S WHAT THE MASK IS

The scene in the anime where his dad talks to him, telling how "the blood of bla flows bla" makes canon the fact that he was born just for the sake of keeping the "bloodline", making him a villain since he was a kid, not like Shig, Dabi or Toga who were traumatized.

So then why does he say this to Deku? Something about "choosing your future" as you want to... while he is actually the one who didn't have many options.

Also we all know he is an ex - entertainer

And how he loves magic and was poor af. Maybe he really only had his father and maybe he died when he was young, making Atsuhiro a young teen/man who lives by himself in the streets. That would also explain him being responsible, mature and more serious than the others. He had more experience, apart from being 32.

I think he didn't want to be a villain in the first place.

That's why he says to the younger people to follow the path they want to, not the one the others told them to.

Or maybe it's just his rebellious nature, he is still a villain after all.

But I like to think that his dream, the path he wanted to follow was being a magician.

To add something else to the theory there's also some scenes where he says that he doesn't really like violence and doesn't steal if it's not a necessity.

Now I don't want to search for every one of them cuz I'm lazy but this one sums up what I just said.

Oh and also when he says this to Bakugo

So idk I hope we'll get a better description of his past because "I'm the great great grandson of Harima" doesn't explain anything tbh👍

Also I still didn't get what Harima's goal has to do with Shig's one... God...Compress is so badly written compared to the other villains😭