#why is that so hard to comprehend
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when the show slaps you in the face with something but apparently not hard enough!
#hi did u know there were no black ppl in Edwardian marriages#screaming#marriage is an institution btw whereby you are molded to fit its structure even if that is not your designated role outside of the marriage#why is that so hard to comprehend#like you can be girl boss ceo outside the home but the nuclear family forces you to be what it needs you to be in the home#the whole dealio with marriage is it doesn't care who you are in society!!#who you subordinate outside the home doesn't affect who subordinates YOU in the home
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trying not to get too mad that the glossary of terms for peoples identities in my volunteer training--like most people--got the definition of pansexual wrong. again.
#personal#ATTRACTION 👏🏻 !!REGARDLESS!! 👏🏻 OF 👏🏻 GENDER 👏🏻#why is that SO hard to comprehend#it is not ''attraction to all genders'' or ''i'm secretly a transphobe''#when i used to call myself pan... it's bc i can be attracted to a person for reasons other than their GODDAMN GENDER
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like i just wanna be left the fuck alone lol
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i swear to fucking god if dynamo doesn't get a new kit next season im going to scream
the stupid kit it has now does NOTHING for it. absolutely nothing. "of you just aren't using your sub!" WHY WOULD I?????? why would i throw it down??????? so it can be DISAPPOINTING?? so it can BREAK 2 seconds later??? such a fucking joke
"maybe it can help you charge your special!!" oh yeah, that special that does not help me at all in most situations. what happens when the snipers are on my ass huh?? i can respawn faster???? so they can just shoot me again?????? shut up actually
im sure the kit is good on SOME weapon, but on DYNAMO?? might as well just not even press the sub button, because its more useful to conserve your ink for swings instead of a dinky little sprinkler that isnt going to help me at all. maybe the tacticooler could be useful for my TEAMMATES, but when im getting spawn camped by some chargers because my sub weapon cant counter them at all? its useless.
maybe this seems a little dramatic and over the top but im seriously so tired of getting my ass kicked by chargers and splatlings every match i play because the devs have their heads up their asses. is it really so hard to give it a kit that works??? a bomb and a decent special that can counter longer range weapons, thats all im asking for.
#splatoon 3#ranting#they've been treating dynamo so fucking dirty#literally all i want is to have fun playing your game splatoon devs#why is that so hard to comprehend#please tell me other dynamo mains feel this way too#gold dynamo in splatoon 2 was AMAZING. why cant we have an amazing dynamo in splatoon 3 hmm?????
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Guys I just found the most hateful Interior Desecration of a Victorian house in Eastern MA
Brace yourselves
Exterior:

Oooh! Pretty! Two-family! Nice molding! Little side porch!
Interior:



I should be legally allowed to kill people who do things like this, I think
(And before anyone starts in with their strawman nonsense, no, this is not a case of “but it’s all someone could afford!!! They were tragically forced to buy a gorgeous Victorian house when they wanted a modern prisonscape, because the market in their area works that way!!! Even though they somehow could find enough money to do an entire interior renovation!!!” it’s a rental property)
#old houses#interiors#Victorian#hateful#like was it probably already gutted to some degree in the 1950s? yes#but I find it incredibly hard to believe it was so extreme that what they did didn’t take out some original features#I just cannot comprehend why the hell you would put that interior with that exterior#what kind of sick twisted person do you have to be#to look at that building and think “BEIGE OPEN CONCEPT’
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the shadow gathers you unto itself
#star wars#prequels#darth vader#anakin skywalker#darth sidious#every line in RotS novelization goes so hard basically#i tried to draw mustafar from memory dont look at me#vader/anakin dichotomy identity trauma stuff rly hitting atm#i. do not like when ppl act like those identities are Wholly Different People esp to ‘absolve’ him of stuff but#the dichotomy itself and why he often feels like he’s a new being separate from anakin is important to me#bc his sense of self is like. inextricably intertwined with the people he’s close to#he can barely comprehend the idea of himself still existing at all if he has no one left#so if he ends up destroying/driving them all away in a desperate downward spiral. but he himself comes out of it alive. then hes like#ok. then. that must mean im not anakin skywalker anymore. and im not a person#and the way sidious positions himself as The Only Thing Vader Has Left because he nursed that fear of loss in him until it consumed him is#hrm. what if i exploded#part of you will always lie upon black glass sand beside a lake of fire while flames chew upon your flesh etc
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one thing i really appreciate about jinshi's character is how he has NEVER once actually had any intention of succeeding the throne. every time the idea is brought up he immediately detests it. so hes giving maomao as much as he possibly can, even though maomao has many qualms about it due to their difference in social status, but jinshi DOESNT CARE because hes NEVER cared about or wanted the status of crown prince! its been nothing but a burden to him! from his perspective the ONLY thing keeping the two of them apart are outside influences. he has no doubt within himself-- hes horribly down bad, in fact. but unfortunately his stupid JOB is getting in the way of him skipping off into the sunset with his favourite little cat
#jinshi literally maiming himself infront of the emperor and empress: “can you please fire me so i can marry the girl of my dreams”#emperor: “no. now go to the west capital relatively unsupervised with the girl of your dreams andpromise REAL HARD u wont something stupid”#also not to mention i think maomaos problem isnt that she doesnt want to marry jinshi bc she doesnt care about him-- she cares abt him A LO#which is precisely why shes convinced herself she cant marry him. she wants whats best for him and#she wholeheartedly believes that marrying her is the EXACT OPPOSITE of whats best for him.#like she has. yknow. not the prettiest of backgrounds. growing up in a brothel might do that to you#shes mentioned before- shes basically a commoner. she has her biologicaldad but hes more of a wildcard selfmade man with no real connection#and she doesnt even like him.#but she just CANNOT comprehend that someone would sacrifice so much for her and ask for nothing in return but her company#i just love them a lot your honour.#the apothecary diaries#the apothecary diaries spoilers#for the anime/manga onlies#READ THE LIGHT NOVEL#kusuriya no hitorigoto#kusuriya no hitorigoto spoilers
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Also, I refuse to entertain the discourse as to whether acespec people are “oppressed” or not, but I will say it’s really fucking lonely — especially if you fall somewhere on the spectrum that’s a little more unconventional.
I’ve discussed many times before how I feel absolutely no attraction whatsoever except towards my lovely partner. I went through the phases queer men tend to: exploring many types of pornography and cruising on Grindr. I really tried, and none of it has ever done anything for me. It wasn’t until I started having sex with my partner that I realised, ohhh, so that’s how most people feel. And even then, enjoying sex with him is far more of an intimacy thing than the actual physical sensations. I do not fantasise about other people or consume porn. There is only him.
And yet when I’ve spoken about this in acespec spaces, I’m still treated as some sort of weirdo who doesn’t belong. I’ve literally been told many times that I can’t be demisexual because demis will still fantasise and consume porn (although that doesn’t line up with my understanding that demis require a close bond to feel sexual attraction, but never mind), and I’ve even been accused of having some weird internalised Christian puritan shit going on because I genuinely cannot comprehend ever looking at or thinking about someone in that way who isn’t my man. As if anything about this is a choice for me and it is offensive to them somehow. As if only feeling attraction to one person is like… “worse” than never feeling any attraction at all. I’ve never once shamed others for how they experience sex and sexual attraction and never would, yet people act like that’s what I’m inherently doing just by speaking about my own experiences.
So no, I won’t say whether acespec people are “oppressed” or not because honestly, when is this shit ever going to come up in conversation and ever be that relevant? But the fact I don’t feel I can talk about it even amongst other queer people, even amongst others in the acespec community, kind of speaks for itself.
Being a queer man who can’t relate to all the stereotypes and anecdotes about enjoying casual sex is one type of loneliness. Being a queer acespec man who can’t even relate to most others in the acespec community is another. I can never win, and either way I do not fit in.
#I know I’ve not really mentioned being demi much here#But this is kind of why lol#Had to get it off my chest though#I know my experience is fairly unique#But idk it’s just hard finding absolutely no one to relate to#Even my own partner has fucked many many men casually and when he and other gay men I meet talk about it…#Their experiences are valid and very common but I just feel like idk. Left out almost? Because they experience and view sex so differently#To me sex is the absolute most intimate thing you can do with another person and it’s only ever felt right for me with my partner#Whereas to him and many others sex isn’t inherently intimate and it’s normal for them to have a quick fuck and forget their name forever#That’s mindboggling to me and it’s hard for me to discuss how left out I feel without seeming like I’m judging#Because I’m really not. I cannot comprehend feeling that way at all but I understand it’s common and normal#Idk I’m waffling and idk if I’ve explained myself well#But I hope even just one person out there relates#This experience is so specific and isolating I need someone else to not feel so alone#I love my partner more than anything in the world btw and he’s so so supportive#But we can’t relate on every level yk#personal#rant#vent#long post#text post#international asexuality day#asexuality#asexual#demisexuality#demisexual#acephobia#relationships#acespec#aspec
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on the other hand the wedding planning subreddits' deep hatred of non-saturday weddings is making me somewhat concerned
i mean i'm sincerely uncertain of whether i will even be properly married in jewish law because 🌸 isn't jewish and you're not getting me anywhere near a ketubah. but. well. i do kind of want a couple of brachot and a chuppah and so on and i suppose in that case i would possibly like to find a reform rabbi who doesn't make my eyes roll back into my head to marry us
but that bring us into conflict with two ideas, the first being that saturday is shabbat, we would like an outdoor ceremony if we can swing it, and any time on saturday when the sun is shining is not a time most rabbis are thrilled to be conducting weddings. and the second being that the general report of the internet is that having a wedding with majority out of town guests on, god forbid, a sunday, means no one will come or else they will all hate us beyond words for making them use pto to travel on monday, and also they won't drink because it's a sunday night and therefore won't dance, and then i suppose they'll all try to kill us with hammers.
#tbh like a non-problem i suspect there are at least two reform rabbis in the chicago area who will conduct interfaith saturday weddings#*I'VE* never observed shabbat beyond friday evenings in my life of course. but maybe i should feel bad about it.#i don't think even my own jewish relatives would comprehend why i wouldn't want to get married on a saturday#given that i'm one of only three of them to have ever darkened the doors of hebrew school.#incidentally are people really this insistent on alcohol at weddings?#like i don't need it to be a dry wedding there will at minimum be wine it's just that neither of us drink due to disinterest#so it's hard to be like. of course. the special dancing prerequisite that costs infinite money#box opener
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"if trans men can benefit from male privilege, then how come we're still oppressed by transphobia?" because trans men are men who are also trans. next question
#literally why is this so hard for some of you to comprehend#transandrophobia#transmisandry#transandromisia#trans discourse
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oh.. So I just found 16 IS the final volume good god... So that volume would have both my favorite chapter of this series and the worst chapter(s) of ANY PIECE OF MEDIA I'VE EVER ENCOUNTERED(this is a personal take) in the same book oh god no....I thought it'd be separated into two volumes, there is no hecking way I ever want to set my eyes on the later chapters of this series, it feels so terrible!!! I was thinking I have to look up some reference to draw that fan comic series I'm drawing because there is a character design I need reference of (yes.. Sarina in 163) but I have to brace myself for even that. The later chapters hurt. It's made me suffer but in a very hollow and meaningless way for me, things felt very unnecessarily cruel. I hated it.
I was; thinking of buying the one w 154 in it and making it my last(I have all the physical copies so far) but goodness.. Hahaha
I bet the author knew splitting the later chapters as separate volumes would be bad on the sales. I get that, but this is the worst!!! I learned the existence of 166.5 too and hahah, I only happen to read the outline but it's so bad...omg akane's into occult??? What.?? I'm glad Kana went to hollywood but seriously??? Is this a joke? and Well I'm glad Ai's not there, glad she's not ruined, I'm actually pretty sure my.. What I've been making out of this series could be better in some aspects, oh I'm ACTUALLY relieved they don't discuss my favs in the added content too! What a relief!!
This comic is, I'm so sorry to say this, but it's so dumb!!! And rude!! Goodness!! Ugh!! Oh I'm.. I..; I'll def give at least a few characters from this series some sort of better closure in my fanwork, I sound so entitled rn I'm sure but, it's TERRIBLE... The original piece is badly written!! Wow, this series had the most ugliest and unfulfilling ending I've ever seen and I'm really sad about that. I devoted a lot of my passion and time and love thinking about it. I wonder what the author has on their mind but l'm sure they know what reception their work would have, it's not their first work either.
I felt really distressed reading the final few chapters of this piece but maybe it wasn't even worth feeling that grief over, I felt really distressed. It actually hurt;;;because it handled a lot of these emotional pain and certain subjects really bad. Things felt so helpless and awkward, I've never been this disappointed about something I read and that is a lot because I had a lot of let-downs. But maybe it wasn't even worth clutching my head over trying to make sense and devote my efforts into deciphering and analyzing things after all. But oh I'm so glad they don't discuss anything about Hikaru and Ai even in the added content in the volume(seems like it?) They don't- I'm sure the writer holds a lot of love towards Ai, I think she's the best written character in this piece(look what happened to Aqua; I can't even say he's written so well anymore and I liked him a lot before the final arc!!)-give them ANY justice
I can chill and do whatever I want w them now omg, idk about Ai but I think I can write Hikaru better, how are they even going to make the anime's third season with this mess I can't???;
I actually wanted a physical print of 154 but I don't want to have those later chapters on my shelf, it feels terrible to read them. It's just unnecessarily painful and it got engraved to my brain in the worst ways, I just don't know why the author would do that, I wanted to love their piece so I kept hanging by and it was so ugly.
This is a very personal take and I know it sounds emotional and all and you may not agree with me!! but I feel this way upon having learned these things. Incredible.
I'm so conflicted. I did want 154 but am I going to risk getting the book for the sake of it. The cons are way too strong. Hikaru I'm so sorry for what they formed of you as a character, the writer ditched you. I don't blame the artist, I blame the writer. The art IS good. It's ridiculous, but maybe it's safer that way. I hope they don't have anything to do with that character ever again, and Ai as well. I'm thankful they weren't ruined any further. Not in a sarcastic way, I'm sincerely relieved. What a piece this is.
#this shouldn't be put in the tag omg#I'm sorry for the negativity; wow but#oh they shouldn't do this to the anime staff omg#I'm pretty sure my theories abt hikaru's right??? it makes everything like 90% more comprehendable#why aren't they doing that?? they put in the hints!! it's all there#this series is...not very good.#the ending is really bad in my opinion#not just bad..I find it so harmful...it didn't tackle the important subjects with the responsiblilities it needed to!!!#it had so many chances to be good. decent. there were so many different options#at this point maybe they made sarutahiko mad for having portrayed him and his wife like that and thus; diverged into the worst path possibl#random blabbering#oh I know I shouldn't criticize someone's hard work like this but this piece was totally a fever dream of some sort it can't be real#I'll complete my fancomic.. I was so scared I portray things wrong but.. I think no. I think I can be confident#I feel really bad;; why did they do this to their own piece of work
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Very cool and not heartbreaking at all for the PJO show to emphasize that Percy is an outsider not only because he's new to the whole demigod thing, but also because he doesn't know the rules of being a traumatized kid with all the daddy/mommy issues possible
#Percy all the time: wait I treated them with kindness and didn't do anything bad#why am I not being treated kindly in return#absolutely everyone else: why on earth would you be entitled to basic human decency?#(and for the kids it's 1000% down to trauma and how they've been raised#so many of the foster kiddos I work with do the same thing#they either have to be so good and perfect (Clarisse and annabeth) that they can't be ignored which works until the parent moves#the goalpost and they're left in the dust with a perfect report card that doesn't get them a second glance#or they have to be so bad that their parents have to intervene (Luke) because#and say it with me folks#bad attention is the same as good attention if it's the only kind you ever get!!#watching this and revisiting TLT specifically has been crazy because they're kids who have been removed from home at their core#that's what our main cast of demigods are#all the year-round kids are removed from home and Percy's ability to go back home and love it just as much as he loves camp is something#that separates him throughout the series#he has a safe place to land during the TLO summer and he's using it and no one else seems to have that#Percy has a stupidly hard life but he has a home base to go to and most of those kids can't even comprehend that as an option#Percy's home is his greatest strength and it'll also forever be something that sets him apart from his peers#I just have thoughts on pjo and foster kids guys#silence emily#percy jackson#pjo tv#I'm arguing this isn't even a spoiler because it's been a running theme. fight me
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i just rewatched the rapture ohhhhh my god. such a good episode the jimmy stuff is actually fucking horrifying somehow even worse remembering claire grows up to be a hunter. then dean and bobby at the end locking sam in the panic room oh i hope they suffer. forever. he shouldve never spoken to their asses again
#im watching with my mom and she is having none of it. she was like BUT SAM SAVED THE DAY??? MORE PEOPLE WOULDVE DIED OTHERWISE#and as soon as sam and dean started talking in the car she was like Why is dean always so mean to him???#so true girl… you would do numbers on here#literally what good did it even serve. he gets OUT. they dont know he’s addicted they dont know anything it’s literally just because dean#sees sam drink blood and he freaks out and somehow thinks he has the right to fucking trick him and lock him up god im so mad….#can u imagine. i just dont think their relationship ever got over that. imagine knowing someone would do that to you#dean in s2 is all Omg i can’t kill sam :((( but he still accepts the idea that it’s his choice whether to do so. that all decisions about#sam are dean’s to make. dean can kill him if he wants. dean gets to lock him up if he misbehaves. it is harrowing!!!#the panic room is literally a punishment like there is NO reason why detoxing needed to be that hard#dean could’ve been with him talking to him it could’ve been something they approached together there are so many ways#he could’ve gone about it which still would’ve been fucked but would’ve been so much less worse#i literally cannot comprehend how you watch this show and come away thinking sam and dean are on equal footing#they hardly are from the start and they certainly arent after season 4.#after that stunt sam could kill dean and i’d support him#spn#oliver talks#sam winchester#sam & dean#spn s4
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I think people tend to forget that the reason Remus wasn't chosen to be the secret keeper for the Potters because Sirius didn't trust him.
At that point Peter wasn't chosen because he was the least conspicuous, but because he was the least suspicious.
All the order knew at that point was that there was a mole in their midst and Remus and Dumbledore suspected it was Sirius because he was a Black and Sirius thought it was Remus because he was a werewolf.
For both of them the rest of their kind was on Voldemort's side and the war had put them on edge.
That incident was meant to showcase the lack of trust in the Marauders during the war. It's meant to be a tragedy that in resorting to the prejudice and thus placing their trust in someone who was actually untrustworthy. You can't tell me James or Sirius were closer to Peter when they made the decision of who is to be the secret keeper.
#marauders#james potter#lily evans#sirius black#remus lupin#peter pettigrew#im done#thank you for coming to my ted talk#Also as a side note for the wolfstar fandom (which I am sadly not a part of because of it's blatant James erasure)#what I mean is even if wolfstar was a thing when they were at hogwarts#it definitely wasn't by the time James and Lily died#i promise i dont hate wolfstar#just dont forget james exists#james can still be sirius' best friend if he is gay#why is this so hard to comprehend#sirius is gay#james is still his best friend
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tbh i still get excited when you like/reblog my stuff ehe it's just for different reasons now !
i definitely used to think you were like. COOL PERSON !!! YUMMY ARTSTYLE !!! VERY SILLY !!! TYPES IN A WAY I CANNOT COMPREHEND YET I'M STILL COPYING IT OUT OF AFFECTION !!!
but now i just get excited because. wow !!! silly bestie cares about what I have to say !!! we have Good Interactions with eachother !!! we both think the other is Cool !!!
wow isn't this world such an amazing world to shower your moots with incredibly thoughtful complements just randomly because free will
giving you a Lot of Headpats :3 headpat explosion >:3

YOUUU. YOU. YOUR TOO NICE WHAT
IHAVE NO PROPER WORDS BECAUSE IM TIRED BUT YOU AREEE SUPER COOL AND THANK YOU ???
IM EXPLODING YOU ASTEROID YOUR TOO NICEEEE GRAAAAH GET HEADPATTED BACK >:3c
#me omw to cry because why are my friends and moots and silly people i find in silly stick figure community SO NICEEEE /silly#BUT THANK YOU AGAIN I AM GOING TO COMPLIMENT YOU BACK WJEN IM MORE AWAKE#i cannot take compliments as is im sorry i HAVE to create compliment wars with people /silly#BUT THSNK YOU AGAIN ???? THISMADE MY DAY AND NIGHT AND WEEK AND GRAAAAH#irs hard to comprehend people think im COOL. like ME ????? me and my yappings and silly blogs are COOL ??? /pos#solar answers
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on a note to all: my plotting style is something i like to call i have adhd and if i see you on the dash and have an idea chances are i’ll im you about it. i’m an anxious little dude who isn’t always active in a broad scope, and it’s always been my nature to reach out to people. that doesn’t make me even remotely anxious. not even remotely expected to answer me — i totally get it, sometimes you don’t feel the vibe — but a general psa about how i work. i come from the dinosaur era where the only way to communicate with one another on any level was to directly talk to them and frankly i don’t even know how else you’re ever supposed to plot with a person otherwise. like… how do you write if you never talk????
#CLAWS RETRACTED.#[honest to god this isn’t shade at anyone im literally just trying to explain i am never on the dash and when i am i take handfuls of rando#snapshots to send to whoever’s in my scope at that second. which is i know ridiculous but when you’re me and you’re mobile 100% of the time#because the other 75% you’re doing everything for everyone in your life it becomes exceedingly hard to WANT to stare at a laptop screen.#even if im home im 100% mobile most of the time. basically what im saying is: as an rper i will totally drop into your im’s randomly if#something strikes my fancy. if that’s not your bag i totally get it. the plotting call life has never been mine to own. a lot of the time#it’ll be a person likes it and then you reach out and it turns into ‘haha neither of us have an idea’ which then kills the whole thing.#hence why -i- tend to approach especially if you reblog something or wishlist it and it crosses my path. like. im so happy to try almost an#anything someone wants to give a shot so long as you feel like playing ping pong with me about it. I’ve always been an exceedingly social#person because i just… love people. and for a person literally exploding with anxiety… I don’t do anxiety about talking to people. I USED#to long ago until I LITERALLY forced myself to just… not give a fuck. but honestly? do it scared and now it’s just fucking do it. I#apologize in advance if I can be a pain in the ass and if it’s not your dig I comprehend an unfollow. im a very involved and interested#writer and frankly it’s how I keep myself able to enjoy this hobby by not making it too serious. like. sometimes I read someone’s rules and#im like Jesus Christ I would love to remember all of this but my brain only has so much ram. idk when the big invisible book of online#etiquette was written but I must have been sleeping in class for that one.]
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