#who is the intended audience for this? no idea actually

[buckleybltch]

Why Tommy is Different to Buck’s Previous Love Interests

and Why it Doesn’t Make Sense.

This is going to be a long and (primarily) impartial post intended for all audiences, whether you like Tommy or not. However, this is not the blog to be airing grievances on. I’m not here for that. I am going to put some opinions of mine through here, but that’s all they are, and I’m going to try stick with facts with a side of interpretation. And Please, for the love of God, read till the end before commenting.

If you want to think I’m nitpicking then go ahead, but every scene of this show gets analysed to death and back for varying reasons. This will be no different.

The Hospital Scene

For the first time, we see one of Buck’s love interests sitting with the 118 at the hospital while they wait to make sure one of their own is okay. In regard to the group chat that appeared on that scene, form your own opinions. We don’t know if Karen or Maddie is in this group chat either. Opinion: I personally don’t think it’s that unusual to have a work group chat, and I also think Bobby showed Athena his phone. I don’t believe that was meant to reinforce the idea that Tommy is an ‘outsider’- if he was an outsider, he wouldn’t have been at the hospital altogether.

Never before has a LI shown up for the 118 at the hospital with Buck. Ali and Abby turned up at the hospital for Buck because it’s him who was hurt, and Taylor was at the hospital with her camera man for the story (s5 May Day). When Eddie got shot, Taylor showed up at the hospital because she thought it was Buck who got shot. Tommy showing up is a unique situation- they were sat in their civvies as a group in the waiting room, and Tommy is there with Buck for Denny. Tommy was part of the 118 waiting room crew; we’ve never seen this before; Buck’s partner showing up for his team(family) at the hospital.

The closest we’ve had before is Abby showing up to Chimney’s return to work party, but at this point they weren’t actually together, and obviously Chimney was okay by this point, it’s not a hospital scene.

The Firefighter Life

When Ali breaks up with Buck, she says it’s because she can’t handle the firefighter life, waiting for him to get hurt. She says it’s not what she wants. This issue isn’t present with Tommy because he is also a firefighter. He knows what he signed up for with Buck, he’s perfectly and intimately familiar with the risks they take everyday and the risk of getting hurt. While it’s a perfectly reasonable assumption that this might still be an issue to some degree, no one wants to see their boyfriend getting hurt after all, they both understand the life and what it means. Tommy solves the reason Ali broke up with him.

The Bobby Approval

This one is a key one. When the scene first aired, I strongly believed (and still do) that this line was also intended for the audience. We have Bobby’s explicit approval of Tommy as a person and for Buck. He’s good people, he’s good for you.

Bobby and Buck never spoke about Natalia or about Ali. I hold the belief, like many, that Bobby never particularly liked Taylor because of how she tried to exploit Bobby in season 2. However, Bobby did help Buck decide on a Christmas gift for Taylor and vice versa. Yet, he never said on screen that he thought they were good together. Hen and Chimney do also come to Taylor for help (s5) with Jonah, but even in that scene they’re shown to not trust her with what they’re telling her.

Abby is more complex as she was a main character in season 1 and her relationship with Buck was a full-season arc. Bobby helped Buck tie his tie and gave him genuinely good advice before their date. Bobby even talks to Buck about having a serious relationship and how to handle it, about how to treat her with respect. Other characters definitely aired their reservations about Abby in season 2 (Is it the age difference? More like the time difference). I believe Bobby gave his implicit, but not explicitly said, approval of Abby through the way he treated and spoke to Buck about their relationship. Despite this, I do think it’s poignant that for the seven years after Buck and Abby broke up, we never saw Bobby approve or like another one of his relationships until Tommy.

The Future Talk

In 8x06, Josh straight up asks Buck if he can see a future with Tommy. This of course follows up Josh already asking “do you care about him, do you think about him when’s not around”. The discussion between Josh and Buck is unique, because Buck has never spoken to a friend about this before. His relationships with Ali and Natalia weren’t developed or long enough to warrant the discussion, he never talked about the future with Abby, and he said “no” at the prospect of proposing to Taylor. For the first time, Buck is asked on-screen if he sees a future with his romantic partner, and Buck says yes. This is explicitly said for the first time. Yes, he made a confused face when Josh asked if he loved him, because clearly Buck hasn’t given it that much thought until he’s confronted with it. Either way, Buck, for the first time, says he wants a future with his romantic partner.

This further prompts Buck to ask Tommy to move in with him, which, different to his motivation for asking Taylor to move in with him, is fuelled by wanting a future. Buck even brings up marriage in his discussion with Tommy, which he’s also never discussed with a romantic partner on screen before. The content of both discussions is something we haven’t seen Buck talk about or admit before.

Eddie Friendship

All of Buck’s love interests, bar Abby, have screen time with Eddie. However, Ali and Natalia only share screen time with Eddie when they first meet because they meet on a call. As Buck’s girlfriends, they don’t share screen time with Eddie.

Taylor once has dinner with Buck, Eddie, and Christopher, and she compliments Eddie’s cooking. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I believe this is the only main time they’re seen together. It’s civil, it’s fine. However, they aren’t friends.

Tommy is a unique situation again; because he’s a guy, it might be easier for Eddie to form a friendship with him. They’re very fast friends, they do Muay Thai together, Tommy works on Eddie’s car, they play basketball together, Tommy went to Eddie’s house 3 times in two weeks and met Christopher. Christopher likes Tommy, he thinks he’s cool, and Eddie invited Tommy to Chris’ virtual birthday party. He’s the first love interest to not only get along with Eddie, but become friends with him outside of Buck (emphasised by 7x04 where Tommy tells Buck that his friendship with Eddie has nothing to do with Buck). The show makes their friendship very clear.

I’ll fully admit that Eddie’s friendship with Tommy was needed for the plot in 7x04, but beyond that, why was it relevant? It already made Buck realise he wanted to be with Tommy. They might’ve needed it for a plot reason but they’re friends afterwards too. Maddie calls Tommy “Eddie’s friend” in 7x05 and they’re laughing together in the hospital and getting alone fine in 8x05. Why?

Fitting Into Buck’s Life

Of course, this all culminates by saying Tommy fits into Buck’s life extremely well.

Tommy doesn’t have to go through the awkward phase of meeting all of Buck’s friends, because the only one he hasn’t met is Eddie. Tommy was previously friends with Bobby, Hen, and Chimney, they already know him. He’s already met Athena. Sure, they might have some catching up to do, but they already have a good history. They’re familiar. Again, Tommy already gets along with Buck’s friends outside of Buck.

Why was Tommy at the hospital for Hen’s son if he wasn’t integrated? Why feel comfortable going to Maddie and Chimney’s wedding? Even Buck makes the point of saying that Tommy is already going to know everybody there; he’s not just his date, he already knows them.

Tommy is friends with Buck’s friends already, Tommy understands the demands of being a firefighter and what it entails with the risks and the commitment. Tommy understands Buck’s friendship with Eddie and Christopher, and his dynamic with Bobby.

Intention (Conclusion)

This is all to say- this is intentional. If the point of the relationship was always to breakup, why have Tommy included in these scenes? Tommy didn’t need to be there at the hospital for Denny, but they wrote it in for him to join the 118 waiting. Bobby didn’t need to give his approval of Tommy on screen. It didn’t further his relationship with Buck nor the plot. It was written this way for a reason, and I think anyone can admit the actual breakup in the scene was abrupt, and it’s all of the above context that makes it even more abrupt.

I know it makes his relationship with Buck more meaningful, sweeter, more heartbreaking for Buck, but we never saw these moments with his ex girlfriends, particularly Taylor, and their relationship was solid until it wasn’t. If this unique treatment of Tommy was meant to put Buck through heartbreak then I offer a second question: what is coming up for Buck that requires him to go through heartbreak?

Why go through the effort of writing Tommy to fit in so well with Buck’s life if he’s only there to further a plot? None of Buck’s other LIs were treated like that, and they achieved the plot they needed to. So why was this different? Buck’s relationship with Taylor was a lot longer, and they lived together, but we never saw these types of scenes with her. Why? Why was this different? What was the point of making the relationship meaningful and different?

Again, this post is not here for people to argue. It should be clear to everyone, regardless of why you think so, that Tommy was treated different by the show than Buck’s other love interests. There must have been a reason, even if that wasn’t clear. Is something big coming up for Buck that he needed to be heartbroken for? Is it poor writing? Is Tommy coming back? There must be some reason that Tommy was treated differently by the writers other than “just because”.

[tomcat-radio]

Wes Anderson's kill count, a result of having too much time on my hands, spoiler: it's complicated.

Firstly, referencing the title, Wes Anderson himself has never killed anyone (at least I hope), but people sure do die in his films sometimes. The question is, exactly how many?

ALSO WARNING!! SPOILERS FOR ALL MOVIES AHEAD! PROCEED AT YOUR OWN RISK!!

The Conditions -

This is a low estimate, meaning only characters who are confirmed to have died are counted. However, if a character is stated to have died and later been resuscitated, they will also be counted. Animal deaths will only be counted if the animal is a character or their death plays a role in the story (for example hunting, or a character eating meat does not count). I will only add to the kill count if I have an exact number, so saying for example, "a lot of people died" means zero for these purposes.

Bottle Rocket

No one died in this one.

Death toll: 0

Rushmore

Eloise Fischer - cancer - 47

Edward Appleby - drowning - age unknown

The Royal Tenenbaums

Helen Tenenbaum - unknown - 55

Rachel Tenenbaum - Plane crash - 35

Royal Tenenbaum - heart attack - 68

Buckley - Hit by car - age unknown

Mrs Sherman - stomach cancer - age unknown 

Death toll: 5

The Life Aquatic

Esteban Du Plantier - eaten by shark - age unknown

Ms Plimpton - overdose - age unknown 

Ned Plimpton - blood loss due to injuries in helicopter crash, likely impaled by helicopter parts - 30

Filipino pirate - bullet to neck - age unknown 

Alastair Hennessey's crew (at least 12 individuals) - cause of death unknown - ages differ

Pirates in hotel (at least 12 individuals) - explosion - ages differ

Death toll: 28

The Darjeeling Limited

Jimmy Whitman - hit by taxi - age unknown

Francis Whitman - motorcycle crash - 39-40

Child crossing river #3 - drowning - age unknown

“One of the sister’s brothers” - eaten by tiger - age unknown

Death toll: 4

Fantastic Mr Fox 

Rat - electrocution - age unknown

Fantastic mr Fox’s father - cause of death unknown - 7 ½ non fox years old 

Death toll: 2

Moonrise Kingdom:

Snoopy - shot by bow and arrow - age unknown 

Sam Shakusky’s mother - cause of death unknown - age unknown 

Sam Shakusky’s father - cause of death unknown - age unknown

Death Toll: 3

The Grand Budapest Hotel: 

Madame D-U-T - poisoned - 84

Jopling - pushed off cliff - age unknown

The author - cause of death unknown - age unknown 

Agatha - illness - age unknown

Agatha and Zero’s child - cause of death unknown - age unknown

M Gustave - shot - somewhere in his forties 

Kovacs - murdered by Jopling - age unknown

Serge X - murdered by Jopling - age unknown 

Headless girl - murdered by Jopling - age unknown 

Kovacs’s cat - murdered by Jopling - age unknown 

Death Toll: 10

Isle of Dogs

Dog in Spots’s kennel - starvation - age unknown

Dog referenced - hung by own leash - age unknown 

Professor Watanabe - poisoned - age unknown 

Atari’s mother - train crash- age unkown 

Atari’s father - train crash - age unknown 

Indigenous dog leader - cannibalised - age unknown

Death Toll: a shockingly low 6, because this operates off of confirmed deaths only. If speculated deaths were counted, Isle of Dogs would likely be the highest by far.

The French Dispatch:

Moses Rosenthaler victim #1 - murder - age unknown

Moses Rosethnaler victim #2 - murder - age unknown

Arthur Howitzer Junior - heart attack - 75

Zeferelli - Electrocuted - 19 

The 8.25 bodies pulled from the Blasé river each week, The French Dispatch definitely takes place over at least three months (evidenced by the riot storyline) , so we’ll multiply this by four and minus one for Zeffirelli, making it 98 - causes of death unknown - ages vary 

72 prisoners - riot - ages vary

6 members of The French Splatter School - riot - ages vary

2 men - shot by Clampette - ages unknown. 

Morisot - jumping from a building - age unknown

Police cadet/nanny - gunshot wound to head - age unknown

7 kidnappers - poisoning - ages vary 

Death toll: 201

Asteroid City

Mrs Steenbeck - illness - age unknown

Conrad Earp - car crash - 50 

Death toll: 2

-

So, without further ado, the lowest possible estimate of the overall kill count from all 11 of Wes Anderson's films is 253, and if you read all of this, I don't know whether to thank you or be concerned.

[theoldworldsrunnerup]

Thinking about this scene

[elftwink]

saw a video about 2 player ttrpgs and one of them was like "this one's about a pretend marriage" and i was like oh? and i looked it up on itch (eyes on the prize, fyi) and it's 50% as of right now and i was like OH? and i bought it immediately & ive read most of it and i am a big fan. and i KNOW that i have friends who would have fun playing it (it's a 2 player or 4 player game; the 4 player variant has 2 fake couples) but asking them is going to be so cringe. yeah we're gonna make up people and pretend to be them and then pretend to pretend to get married and the characters when they start their pretending they're gonna be like "oh we don't have any romantic feelings towards each other this is strictly plot" but then (get this) they will start to develop real feelings for each other. and we're gonna act it out together and pretend to be them but don't worry! we have no romantic feelings towards one another. this is strictly plot. when WE (irl) pretend to be in love it's actually platonic, unlike the people who we are pretending to be to each other. so do you have like 2-5 hours you wanna dedicate to that next week

and the worst part is that's 100% what i want. like i have roleplayed romance before with friends it is literally not a big deal because the whole point of roleplay is that the character ISN'T you. but with a fake relationship the crushing weight of dramatic irony hovers behind me

[coquelicoq]

i finally wrote an xword that i think might be nyt-submittable...i originally wrote it for the local paper though so i now have to go back through and rework the clues to take out the specific local ones and make some of the others harder. i know exactly which day of the week this would run in the nyt (if it gets accepted) because this type of theme always runs on the same day, so at least i know which clue difficulty to aim for, but i'm still finding it difficult to hit that precise level! i'm used to just making the clues as easy as possible because my local paper's audience is mostly people who aren't xword aficionados. i already reworked this puzzle a couple times based on feedback from friends and family but that was all still when i thought i'd be running it in my local paper. i kinda just want to be done with it but i've never had a theme and fill i thought were completely nyt-worthy before!

[jinzouactor]

Big fan of your worm! Out of curiosity - what made you choose that title for your Shimamine comic? Like a mayfly in milk is a peculiar name

t-thank you?🐛

Ok I guess, well partly its a reference to the lyrics of Haru Hisagi by Yorushika. It's a song that i LOVE even if its themes aren't particularly relevant to the plot (yet?). I like the mayfly imagery in that song. For me the word evokes something thats fleeting or short-lived.

I also used the idiom "like a fly in milk" which, honestly I thought was about being out of one's depth / floundering in a situation you're not suited to / not being able to handle one's circumstances (like "a fish out of water"). Apparently the phrase is more like being conspicuous in a negative sense. Either way works I guess..

I don't even know if im happy with this title but even now i can't think of a better one 😭 so we're rolling with this

[nicholasalexanderchavezdimes]

I love you, I’m sorry:

Summary: You attend a party with Nicholas and he gets wrapped up in his conversations, he wasn’t intentionally ignoring you although it feels that way.

Nicholas had been ignoring you for more than half of the party now. It had been three hours of watching him work the room, mingling with Hollywood executives and shaking hands with everyone important, meanwhile, you were standing against the wall, all alone.

You grew tired of nursing your Shirley Temple and wanted to leave. Your eye searched for him, it didn’t take long to find him. His laugh was distinct and you could hear it a mile away.

He made eye contact with you, giving a sympathetic smile as he could tell you were growing exhausted waiting around for him.

He always made this promise to you, “come with me! This time will be different!”

It never was.

Nicholas has good intentions of course but you weren’t an actress and had nothing in common with the people around you. You weren’t in the industry at all, and that made it easier for you to fall into the background. Nicholas was too blinded by the Hollywood lights to even notice.

••••

“Stop, please! I’m sorry!” He followed you out of the crowded party. He had only whispered the words loud enough for the two of you to hear, the last thing he wanted to do was cause a scene.

The thought of losing you made his stomach turn, his entire face was boiling and red as he was quick on your heels. You had only been dating for six months but he intended to make it last far longer than that.

The intense sense of panic was sinking in, he had done it again. He had isolated the one person who truly understood him, for a night of fake laughing and strategic handshakes and the guilt was setting in.

You heard him but ignored him anyway, starting to walk down the street. You were unsure of where you were going, considering you hadn’t driven there and you had no idea where you were.

“Baby- please!” His voice was louder, garnering the attention of the people in the front yard of the party. Nicholas hated making a scene, he didn’t want that type of negative attention but he was so desperate to get you to listen to him that in the moment he didn’t care to risk it.

The tone of his voice made you freeze, you could hear the emotion behind it. Nicholas has never cried in front of you before, and you’d feel guilty if the first time he ever did was when he had an audience of his peers staring back at him.

You half smiled at the onlookers, grabbing his hand before leading him down the street to a secluded area. The two of you sitting down beside one another on a lonely park bench.

“I’m sorry, you know I don’t mean to-“

“I was standing alone in the corner of that party for hours Nicholas! Hours!”

You never called him by his name, it was normally something cutesy. He loved your pet names, but hearing his actual first name was a stab in the heart.

“Why did you even bring me? To embarrass me? To make me feel alone? Why do you always do that?” Your voice finally cracked, letting him know just how hurt you were by it all.

“No! Not at all!” It was in his nature to be naturally defensive, something he was trying to work through. A sigh escaped him as he closed his eyes to center himself.

“I love you, and I’m sorry. I just get so caught up in the moment and five minutes turns to ten and then suddenly it’s been two hours and-“

“Did you just say you love me?”

He had never said it out loud before, at least not to you. He hadn’t even realized he said it now until your eyes widened and the look on your face completely changed from pensive to a smile.

“Yes,” he sighed again, this time relieved to finally have gotten that off his chest.

“I love you and I’m going to do better at showing it.”

[kookiewithluv]

..★.──MASTERLIST──.★..

• TITLE: ASHES OF A PROMISE

• PAIRING: Lycan king!Jungkook x Werewolf!Reader

• GENRE: Paranormal Romance, Dark Fantasy, Smut, Slow burn, Fluff (?), Tragic Romance, werewolf au, Royal au

• RATING: 18+

• WORD COUNT: Ongoing

• TRIGGER WARNING: This story contains explicit and graphic sexual content, with themes of intense physical desire, possessive (dom-sub) dynamics, and primal, instinct-driven encounters. It also explores deep emotional conflict, grief, loss, and difficult decisions surrounding love and sacrifice. This story includes mature content not suitable for all audiences. Reader discretion is strongly advised.

• SUMMARY: You were a hopeless romantic, dreaming of a mate who would love you as fiercely as you loved him. But when you finally meet your mate, you discover he’s no ordinary wolf — he’s the Lycan king, the alpha of all alphas. Worse, he neither wants you nor is willing to reject you, leaving you trapped in a loveless bond in his kingdom. As queen to a king who resents you, the mate bond grows stronger, making you more vulnerable with each passing day. Now, you must break through the walls around his heart and make him love you, because staying in this bond without love is unbearable, yet leaving isn’t an option he’ll allow.

• a/n: This story is entirely a work of fiction and is the sole property of @kookiewithluv . The characters, events, and scenarios depicted are products of the imagination and are not intended to represent or reflect real-life situations, nor do I wish for anything portrayed here to occur in reality. I kindly ask that my work not be copied, translated, or reposted as your own on this or any other platform, including YouTube. Please respect the effort and originality behind this piece. Thank you for your understanding and support.

✿ PROLOGUE: bound by fate forsaken by love

Your alpha is pushing you to accept his mating proposal and drags you to the royal gathering hosted by the Lycan king. But once you’re there, you discover that the Lycan king is actually your true mate.

✿ CHAPTER 1: the mate's lament

Even though the Lycan king, Jungkook, saved you from your alpha, he made it clear he didn’t want you around. Still, you had to stick close to him and follow all the rules he was throwing at you.

✿ CHAPTER 2: (coming soon)

OTHERS

moodboard

a/n: Let me know what you think in any way you like—comments, messages, carrier pigeons, whatever! I'd love to hear! If you want to be tagged for future chapters, just send me an ask also character asks and drabble requests are open, so hit me up with your wildest ideas.

[seventeendeer]

this isn't at all meant to be condescending or finger-waggy because 100% we all have blind spots like this, but I'm really, really hoping that the people who never found Gaiman's approach to his own fandom concerning in any way will take this all as a learning moment.

he was an older, hyper-famous author engaging directly and frequently with an online audience of largely vulnerable young marginalized people. he presented himself as cultured and worldly, and made himself approachable as someone to go to for advice, encouragement and "wisdom." his manner of speech was extremely pathos-heavy and clearly intended to be comforting and encouraging in exactly the way his target demographic needed it to be to swallow every word. the way he spoke about stories and creativity was designed to make young creative hopefuls feel special and important, while sweeping real analytical techniques under the rug - in hindsight, likely so no one would think too critically about the disturbing amount of patriarchal abuse played for cheap shock value and voyerism in his own body of works.

Gaiman saw a target demographic that was desperate for an older creative role model to tell them they were worth something, and he exploited that pain to twist a narrative around himself where he was king and any critique leveled at him or his works were the enemy.

to be clear, he could have been innocent. he could totally have been just an out-of-touch old man saying nice things to people because he wanted to be kind and he thought he was a lot smarter than he really was. red flags are warning signs, not a surefire way to tell if someone is actually "secretly shitty."

but if you used to look up to him, PLEASE take this moment to revisit the ideas you absorbed from him. did you take his words to heart because they seemed to have objective merit? or did you take them to heart because it felt good to believe what he said? do you still hold these values? does knowing he was intentionally manipulating his online audience make you less certain? do you need more information from a different source before deciding one way or another?

again, I'm just really, really hoping people on here will take a moment to reevaluate the ideas and opinions he's injected into tumblr fandom culture, because his reach is immense and he has absolutely been manipulating popular perception of relevant topics to gain further influence and control the narrative around both his own and Pratchett's legacy. please, please take this moment to notice what he's been doing - and next time someone tries to pull the same shit, hopefully we'll be able to apply what we've learned from experience.

[ccieatchildren]

I’m sure we’ve all seen by now Steve Blackman’s reasoning for Five/Lila stating:

“I felt that Five had to have a love story.”

And how it shows how this man somehow has such a deep fundamental misunderstanding about his own characters. How he helped create the first three seasons of this show and doesn’t realize that

This is Five’s love story.

Umbrella Academy the show wouldn’t exist without Five’s love. The whole plot and story is it.

He is the catalyst of all the plot lines while his family is the center of all the story beats. His love is the instigator for all the events of the show simply because he chooses to do everything possible in the hope that it will save his loves.

It’s not like this was even a subtle idea because Five literally states it himself multiple times over the series!

I just don’t understand how you can get it so wrong.

He creates the Commission in hopes of regulating the timeline so his family won’t get obliterated from existence, tattooing himself with the potential solution to rewriting the universe so they can all live happily one day.

He survives the apocalypse all on his own, when there was no real reason to, just because he believed he could get back to his family, spending 50+ years developing the math to one day do so.

He joins the Commission and murders and maims and manipulates in the desperate attempt that he might have a chance to go back and see/save his family.

He spends the first time he sees his family after over six decades not with them, but rather searching for a way to stop their deaths, sending them all through time when it doesn’t work.

He runs himself ragged stopping apocalypse after apocalypse just for them.

And when he loses all hope, accepting the kugelblitz, he is content to know he is doing so with his family.

As much as this show is about the whole family, ultimately, imo, this is Five’s story about his grueling quest to save the family he loves.

Because otherwise this show wouldn’t exist without him and the rest of the characters would just be decorations in the rubble of a world long gone.

So to say bro needed a love story— he doesn't say romance, but love story— is so durna, like what??? I guess if you really wanted him to have a romance you could do that, but there were many better options than the wife of someone he deeply loves, something he would never do.

(Not to mention all the real world implications of the romance with the actors, production really was waiting for him to be legal ಠ_ಠ)

Also I don’t think it’s a coincidence that many fans view Five somewhere under the aro/ace umbrella (pun intended).

Now, because of this misconstruction the ending of the show also suffers.

Brushing over all the mind boggling things the real ending says about abuse, its victims, and growing from it (which is actually like how did no one look at that and think hmm maybe this isn’t right for the story we’ve been telling), it also misunderstands love. It tells the audience that love isn’t worth it, in a show… about love. Not just Five’s but Hazel/Agnes, Viktor/Sissy, Allison+Claire, and more. How all your pain and suffering and tribulations for those you love are stupid and useless and cringe.

But y’know what, Mr. Blackman, I think you’re cringe for that absolute bonkers bananas ending.

And that’s why having the solution to the series being that Five should have never jumped in the first place would have been the best ending.

Making it so that the only solution to save the whole universe be that Five stay with his family, with those he loved— what he had been trying to do for the whole show— would have been the perfect conclusion to the story. It would show that all he had to do was stay, because that’s all they ever needed, that’s all he ever needed.

AND IT WOULD MAKE LOGISTICAL SENSE.

Five and Viktor are well confirmed to have been the closest ever since they were young. And Five (doesn’t matter if he’s the now Five who lived through the shows events or the young one who ran off) would most certainly be a supportive figure in Viktor’s life. He’s smart, for one, and it wouldn’t be a stretch for him to figure out what was really going on (especially with his hatred of Reginald) and help Viktor that way. But even if he doesn’t, when they grow to adults and Viktor naturally doesn’t take his pills or his power starts showing, Five’s love and care for his (closest) brother would most certainly help prevent the apocalypse. Especially since if Five and Viktor are close, as they grow older, I feel like the others would grow closer as well, maybe not the same degree, but they would be more willing and supportive of Viktor in the end (I feel like Season 1 shows us how at the end of the day the siblings do care for Viktor, but they were just too late, so this time they wouldn’t be).

Through the subway we see the timeline where he jumps still exists, so that should mean there is a way for him not to do that. His jumping (and the siblings he brings along) is what creates the paradoxes and the "need" for the Commission. So by him not jumping, problem solved.

This might come at the cost of the current versions of the characters, but I think if they can make the developmental journeys they did once, I think they can do it again, and have a happy ending.

(Also the Jennifer incident wouldn’t happen either bcs of Five or just bcs that plot line was so fluffin stupid, so yay alive Ben)

(And Diego and Luther meet Lila and Sloane respectively cuz they are also part of the marigold brood so they still do exist at the same time, so yay happy couples)

It is somewhat simple, but I think that works as well, especially for a character like Five. He spends so much time looking at all the different equations, trying to find some complex solution to everything, trying permutation after permutation (as evidenced by our and the diner Five's), when it was right in front of him. Idk, I just think it would be nice if he just decided to stay with his siblings instead of running off.

Sure it may not be completely perfect, maybe Ben still does die, or Klaus can’t meet Dave again, or characters still find themselves prey to their arrogance but I don’t think it needs to be, because real life isn’t perfect. But the bonds we make and the love we share makes it so, a major theme the Umbrella Academy isn't unfamiliar with.

And it just makes me so deeply sad that this isn’t the ending we got. That this isn’t the ending the characters got.

They deserve so much better than Blackman gave them, and it’s a disgrace that he didn’t.

[melrosing]

so stuff I’ve not liked about the finale and S2 more generally…. unfortunately it’s a lot and i'm thinking i might need to say this in several parts but first and foremost: the pacing really was shit and i don't just mean there weren't enough action scenes i mean the whole season they've had almost nothing to say about these characters and have just been making us think they do by having them repeat the same ham-fisted monologues about power and peace and the cost of war and whatever whilst moving at a glacial pace from one minor plot point to another and by the end of it most of these characters STILL haven't changed, and where they have it feels undeserved, and yes they really are at roughly the place they started so what have they even got to show for these eight hours of TV?? like damn

and I do get that the writer's strike has really effected them here and HBO hacking two eps off their season affected them too and that really can't be helped. but the pacing has been pretty poor from kick off and I can't just put it down to this being a more 'internal' season. i do not care about big battles. it's fine to have a season of a show that’s more about the characters’ interiority rather than plot action. that’s the exact reason why I like AFFC so much.

but these characters barely have interiority like idk what to say. some like Rhaenyra, Jace and Alicent have been spouting the same monologues every episode about wanting peace/wanting agency/wanting peace again etc etc, and the more interesting moments like Alicent's apparent suicide attempts, Rhaenyra's butchering of the dragonseeds etc... I mean where IS the interiority here?? unless they are spelling out a character's thoughts in the most literal way they can (as per Jace's diatribes about the dragonseeds), they leave their audience to do absolutely all the work by showing us nothing, and just leaving us to figure that the characters must be having some kind of thoughts but y'all can decide what they are.

and even Daemon, whose entire ARC was about his interiority.... like look I was so so ready to love this arc. i love fucked up little dream sequences. i love harrenhal. i was really enjoying the angle they took with alys. i was here for it. but now we've seen the whole of his S2 arc, im going to say yes, it was intended as a redemption adjacent kind of arc, and it isn't a very good one. Daemon has a handful of weird dreams, gets shouted at by some Riverlands folk, and he's a changed man.

consider the character everyone compares Daemon to (and who I'm always more than happy to talk about) and that's Jaime. and look at the sheer ground covered in ASOS: Jaime breaks out of a dungeon, Jaime meets a younger version of himself, Jaime gets his hand hacked off, Jaime reveals his anime villain backstory in the bath, Jaime deals with Roose Bolton, Jaime has a weird weirwood dream, Jaime fights a fucking bear - and at this point we're still only about halfway through.

now in contrast, what have they actually managed to do with Daemon this season. where has that finale moment with Rhaenyra been earned. this is not slow pacing for the sake of powerful character development, it's slow because they don't have anything else to say.

and also look at the state of characters like Aemond who seemed really promising in S1, yet in this season he barely reflects on the fact that he hadn't meant to kill Luke, and this war is an accident that he started, etc etc - he's just a killing machine lol. there were some nice touches in there, like i say i enjoyed Helaena telling Aemond how he'll die in the finale. but I no longer trust these writers to do anything with their more inspired ideas because they just consistently fail to do so.

look at Baela!!! like my god, has Baela had the opportunity to do anything except A) what she's told and B) counsel men on their feelings. she has like one moment looking at Daemon and you feel like the series is going to explore how complex it is to be Daemon Targaryen's daughter.... but my god they never do!! so where IS this interiority we've spent eight episodes on! what have they got to show for it!!

and i talked more weeks back about how frustrating i've found the writing of women more generally in this series and as of the finale I am finding it so egregious and so condescending. women want peace. women want to protect their children. women are tired of men. women are tired of war. women are trying to end this war peacefully. women are pacifists. women hate violence. and so on and so on and so on like jesus christ who am i even talking about here. even i don't know. it's so boring. it's so dry. and it requires female characters to always be the paragons of virtue, never do anything truly condemnable, never be unlikeable, never fucking anything except stand around saying how much they hate this. im bored of it and it makes me angry that they would do this in a series that specifically seeks to make everyone grey and everyone complex - they keep suggesting that might extend to the women before abruptly shutting it down again. see Alicent and Rhaenyra even STILL, after EVERYTHING, trying to peacefully shut down the war for the sake of love and friendship in the goddamn finale. I don't believe it anymore!! it's not cute! it's just dull!!!

and finally that just kind of brings me to how shortsighted a lot of the plot developments seem, when you see how the characters fail to reckon with their pasts or shit that just happened. Rhaenyra and Mysaria make out, and then that's never mentioned again and the tone never changes between them. Rhaenyra is done thinking about Luke. Helaena is done thinking about Jaehaerys. Aegon actually didn't mention Jaehaerys in the list of things he's 'lost' in that finale. Alicent's relationship w Viserys was just now condensed to 'we were fond of each other but he always liked your mum better'

like idk it's just. if this season's pacing is all about giving characters the chance to change and grow into the people they'll be when this war REALLY kicks off.... do it. write it. do not just write the same monologue a dozen times and hope it'll hit harder with each. doesn't work like that. sorry.

[genericpuff]

The excessively passive voice when talking about Minthe being intended to have BPD is hilarious. "It was thought to have her written with BPD"? So weird

Honestly, once you start noticing this passive voice in how Rachel writes and talks, it's kind of hard to unsee.

Like, for starters, the BPD example. It's very non-committal, almost as if to sound like she never actually wrote her with BPD, it was just an 'idea' that she could neither confirm or deny as canon. But then you read the episode with the slap and-

It's- it's literally called "Splitting". It's about as subtle as a brick to the face. This entire episode showcases Minthe having an actual literal episode of splitting and it's plain as day to anyone who can read the title card and put two and two together. So for the wording to be so passive around her characterization... it wasn't "thought" to have her written with BPD, she was written with BPD.

Another example that sticks out in my mind of Rachel's passive writing is far later in Season 3, when Demeter reunites with Persephone and naturally expects her to come back home with her.

This line still fucking bothers me to this day. Besides the fact that it's just really poorly written dialogue, Persephone describes her being in love with Hades as if it's just some coincidental thing that happened to her that she can't avoid and not a deliberate choice she's making. "It would seem" my ass, Persephone is a coward for not being upfront and just talking to her mother like an adult by saying, "Mother, I love you, and I understand why you want me to come home, but I'm in love with Hades and want to stay in the Underworld with him." Instead the way it's worded is almost designed to absolve Persephone of any and all agency in her own decisions and active participation in her relationship with Hades by instead making it out to be just some circumstance that she can't get herself out of.

Again, this isn't quite as egregious as the aforementioned BPD scene, but it's still irritating because Rachel writes like this a lot throughout LO. And it's not just the dialogue either, entire decisions throughout the comic are flip-flopped and kept vague by Rachel so she can give herself plausible deniability over the narrative. I could come up with some of my own examples, but I think she managed to speak for herself just fine in the end-of-series Q&A that left both critics and fans of the series massively confused and disappointed:

LO is full of half-committed plotlines because Rachel herself can't commit to her own decisions. So the decisions she does make are left vague enough that hardcore fans are willing enough to fill in the blanks themselves, but anyone who asks her genuinely what her plan was, she just gives the same wordy "IDK it's up to your interpretation!" response. It's like she thinks people are asking her as just another reader who can only speculate, but she's literally the author, so why is she acting like her guess is as good as theirs?

Well, because that's how she wrote LO. That's how she's always written comics, with vague half-finished thoughts and just enough for readers to do the mental gymnastics of making sense of it all just to give her the credit for "smart writing" that she never actually did because she stopped paying attention after the first sentence. And that method of being vague for the sake of audience interpretation is fine for illustrations or anything that isn't trying to be a concise narrative, but LO did try to be that and it really shows how hard it failed in doing so when its own creator can't even come up with something slightly plausible to explain all the questions people had in the end. "There is some backstory there" but proceeds to not actually expand on said backstory. "I like to imply things without outright telling people", so do I, but the difference is that Rachel is using that as a crutch to not answer the questions she setup for her readers and then didn't resolve after five years. There's not wanting to spoon feed people the plot, and then there's literally refusing to explain your decisions when writing said plot, almost because you don't know any more than they do.

The entirety of LO is rooted in Rachel's passiveness, from her inability to answer questions concisely to every little plot point that was established and dropped throughout the comic's run. Writing a story is a series of decisions, deciding what to keep, deciding what not to keep, deciding what has to be changed, etc. and Rachel just... doesn't seem like someone who's ever been capable of making those decisions, especially when she's writing an actual long form story to the end and doesn't have the luxury of dropping it whenever it feels convenient for her like she did several times with The Doctor Pepper Show. Once she was actually held to a standard, once she was actually signed into a contract that expected her to make those decisions, she failed to and it culminated in one of the messiest conclusions to a story I've seen since Game of Thrones.

LO is kind of like Schrodinger's Cat - a plot point can be or not be whatever it needs to be so that Rachel can be either praised for smart writing she never did or absolved of bad writing that she did do. It's equally parts interesting and vague enough that whatever her readers give her credit for writing, she can give them a thumbs-up and go "you're totally right, champ!" and proceed to take all the credit of being a "good writer" from the efforts of her own audience who had to jump through a million hoops to make sense of her own messy writing.

But when she's put on the spot by those very same readers to answer for her own decisions, she can't.

Because she never made them.

Because there was never anything "deeper" going on, that's just what her style of "distraction writing" made you believe. The plot never lets you stop to think about what you just read long enough before zipping away to the next thing and distracting you with a new twist or a new character or a new plot point, and before you know it, you've gone weeks without reading about the last thing that was established you probably haven't even realized that those questions never got answered. Sometimes Rachel remembers to get back to those things and resolves them within a handful of panels, other times she forgets them entirely and just leaves them to rot in the hopes that no one ever calls her out on it. And when they do... she can just pull the get-out-of-jail-free "Welp, it's up to your interpretation!" card and get that credit all over again for being deep and insightful, meanwhile those who are rightfully dissatisfied with that answer are blanket-accused of "getting mad at Rachel for not writing the story they wanted".

To close out this ask that, per tradition, turned into an essay, I'd like to recall the famous words of fictional detective Benoit Blanc: "Look into the clear center of this glass onion... Miles Bron is an idiot!"

[rotrightthrough]

We’re live!

Word count: 2000 somehow?? I intended this to be a little Drabble but oh well. This is a re upload for visibility. Idea is from @swollentummies

Eli adjusted his lingerie to drape perfectly over his baby bump. The fabric was extremely tight, a purchase from much earlier in his pregnancy, but it was one of his favorite pieces, made of pure, delicate white lace, and today was an important show. He was prepared to go all out. “Be good for this one ok?” He whispered down at the 42 week swell of his belly. Eli had actually planned to take a break from camming after he hit his due date but after 2 weeks of minimal movement and no signs of imminent labour, he decided to bless his viewers with one last show, one where he’s as pregnant as he’ll ever be. A grand finale of you will.With one more adjustment of his posture he flicked on his camera and smiled as he watched the viewers pour in. “Ok guys I’m sad to say this will be my last show for a while, so let’s make it a good one.”

Comments flooded through the chat, many disappointed but just as many merely excited to see their favorite camboy stream so close to birth. “We’re going to be doing donations for requests today. Nothing too crazy though.” He giggled, “don’t want to send me into labor.” His first donation came in right after that statement. It was a pretty hefty one too, with the request being simply to do 10 jumping jacks. “Jumping jacks?” He raised an eyebrow, but shrugged. A request is a request after all. The mere action of standing up was arduous now, but he tried to make it look more sultry and less like he was a beached whale coming up from the water. He did one jumping Jack before realizing why the donor had requested such an action. As he jumped out his belly would bob and sway, the pure gravity and speed of the action foreign to Eli’s body at such an advanced stage in pregnancy.

He tried his best to make the exertion appealing to his viewers, even lingering to gently stroke his belly afterwards, which was now awake with a flurry of exercise induced activity. He panted as he sat back down, adjusting his camera so the viewers could be treated to a full view of his overdue belly. “Oof, that was tougher than I thought, I guess I’m getting pretty out of shape huh?” He chuckled before glancing back at his monitor. He saw a request to get onto his bed and immediately took it, those jumping jacks certainly did a number on his back. This odd pain began to spread at the base of it, radiating upwards. But he ignored it, after all who doesn’t have back pain when they were as overdue as he was.He leaned against the plush pillows of his bed, propping his belly up like a cake in a display case. He glanced at a particular donation and grinned mischievously. It was a challenge he’d done quite a few times before.

He had a small vibrater that he had programmed to raise in one level of speed and intensity every time someone donated over 1,000 dollars. It had been a staple prop in his shows for a while now but he hadn’t used it since he hit 36 weeks, afraid to set off labor. However since the amount of money needed to raise the level was so high, he reasoned it would probably stay at a pretty tolerable level of stimulation. “No I am not lowering the level raising price.” He giggled as he slipped the little toy between the very small allowance between his lingerie. It was so tight even the small vibrator fit snugly and secure in his panties. “This is our last show for a bit, don’t go cheaping out on me.” He added a little pout as a flourish.

Then a devious little idea popped into his head.He leaned against the pillows and adjusted his hips so the audience could see the bulge of the vibrator in his semi transparent panties. “I’m so worried though, I heard too much stimulation can cause someone to go into labor,” he purred and stroked his ripe belly. “I really hope that doesn’t happen.” Eli smirked internally. The vibrator had ten levels, and it was incredibly rare for it to ever get above a 5 in a single show, especially considering certain patrons would pay to interrupt the portion to get him to do other acts, resetting the donations. He knew even a 5 may be a little intense for him this late in his pregnancy, but he was certain he could handle it. He was a professional.The first donations flow in, probably brought on by his teasing.

They come faster than usual but not intolerably so, even in Eli’s gravid state. Despite this he makes a show of it, sitting up and rocking his hips, moaning softly as the vibrations echo throughout him. He feels his stomach tighten from the sudden shift but simply continues to rock his hips, it helps with the odd pressure forming at his pelvis.“Oof, guess I’m extra sensitive today guys, only level 1 and I’m already feeling it.” He smiled, tracing hearts along the overstretched skin of his belly button.

As he rode his way through the vibrations he decided to answer some questions.“No, the doctor said he doesn’t think it’s twins. Just one big guy.” He chuckled, reading through further. “Oh come on, don’t underestimate me. I can totally give birth to them naturally. I know my hips are a little narrow but I’ll be getting an epidural so it’ll be fine.” The chat seemed a little disappointed at that and Eli smirked a little too smugly. “What, did you guys want me to give birth on stream? That’s a little far even for me.” For some reason donations started to flood in after that, brutally fast, as if Eli taunts had only encouraged them.

Eli’s performative panting and moans began to transform into genuine guttural sounds as he felt the pressure build around the base of his abandoning. His belly seemed to squeeze with every new donation, a constant war between the pleasure of the vibrations and the pain of these odd sensations. And then it hit him. He was in labor. The thought quickly made him spiral before he realized a few things. This was his first baby, and first babies are known to take forever and his water hadn’t even broken yet. He was fine to wrap up the show.Besides he was making more money now than he ever had. Even an hour more could mean thousands of dollars. But as the vibrator began to approach level 4 he panted a few shallow breaths. The little squeezes were becoming big- long squeezes, so intense they were visible on his belly from the monitor. His stomach now sat between his thighs, low and heavy.

“Ok guys I think we’re gonna wrap up soon. I think I’m in labor.” Perhaps his chat thought he was doing some sort of roleplay thing because that really made the donations go haywire. Hundreds of dollars at a time skyrocketed him up to level 5, causing his entire body to become jelly like- moaning lewdly. “Fuck, guys I’m serious.” He panted, rubbing a hand from the base of his contracting belly to the top, feeling how rock hard the surface was. “Hooo look,” he stammered out, poking his belly for emphasis, showing the camera the state of his baby bump, stretched beyond its limits and wracked with contractions.

He kept trying to reach for his camera, or his monitor to shut off the stream but each new donation and each new contraction kept his nailed down, clenching around nothing. “Ooo fuck guys.. hooo, owww,” he moaned, moving again before immediately realising what a horrible idea that was.Sitting up in it of itself was a struggle on a good day, sitting up with a vibrator in him and a baby thrashing around was nearly impossible. He attempted to wade through the mixture of agony of bliss, rocking his hips in a circular motion.

Unfortunately this only seemed to encourage his babies descent, and before he knew it, he felt the whole weight of the baby on his pelvis, pressing against his cervix. Little by little he was managing to sit up, having to lay back slightly every time a new donation or contraction came in. But eventually he was able to make it right to the button on his pc, finger hovering over it and then-

Optimus_Alpha donated $4,000!

Pop!

Just like that his progress was halted and he threw his head back in a combination of ecstasy and agony. Not only had the vibrator been brought up to its maximum level in the span of a minute, but the pure shock of it caused his water to break, amniotic fluid soaking his bed and his beautiful white lingerie. His brain started to panic, before instinct set in and he almost forgot that he had an audience, with more flooding in each minute. Thousands of viewers, all about to lay witness to the birth of a new life. “Hooo fuckkkk-“ Eli moaned gutturally, attempting to shove off his panties as he felt them bulge. But it was useless, they were just too tight.

He needed scissors or something, but he would be amiss if he ruined such a perfect pair of panties.So instead he focused on slow pushes, panting heavily as he managed to push the lacy lingerie off. It was an agonizing process, his mind hazy with pain throughout, but eventually the panties lay at his swollen ankles and he was able to remove that damn vibrator. Now that his panties were off his viewers received a full view of his bulging exit, swollen and dangerously stretched over the baby’s massive head. He stroked the area with a free hand, gasping as he felt the sliver of head stretch him, a bit of dark hair peeking out.

“Ohhh fuck fuck he’s so big, he’s too big.” Eli cursed, clutching his belly. He was wracked by constant contractions now, and with no vibration to distract him he was forced to confront the full pain of childbirth.

He pushed and squeezed until his face grew a shade of bright red, stroking his belly with one hand and the fiery ring of hell that was his nether regions with the other, helping to stretch the area. The burn was terrible, like nothing he had ever felt, and he became lost in it, bearing down and pushing like his life depended on it.He clutched at his ruined silk sheets as he bore down for one brutal push before he heard a satisfying pop of the baby's head dislodging. He met momentary relief before having to pant out the shoulders, adjusting himself into a low squat to accommodate the rest of the baby's body. With the shoulders out the feet quickly followed and the not so little baby that emerged from him started to cry.

Eli collapsed onto his pillows, cradling his 12 pound infant to his chest. He laughed tiredly before laying a kiss on the babies forehead. “Well aren’t you a cutie?” He sat their peacefully for a moment before he heard his computer ding, signaling the 3 hour mark of the stream. Shit. He forgot to turn the damn thing off. “Umm.” He smiled nervously. “I told you today was a special show?” Honestly, it was a net positive. The money he made from that stream was enough to go on maternity leave for a loooong time.

[honeytama]

Please don’t keep me waiting.

Noah Sebastian X Reader (uses she/her pronouns, referred to as a girl)

A/N: This is my first time writing for THE attractive, tall man. Your girl is a new fan <3 Feel free to lore dump on me in my asks/dms. This piece is hella self indulgent, because all I want is a detailed tattoo tour from Noah himself. 🧎🏻‍♀️

Summary: Twitch streaming a tattoo tour with your best friend and his viewers catch on to your natural chemistry. Noah notices a change in your demeanor due to their comments and bugs you for a talk in private once the camera is off.

Content: Use of y/n, fem!reader, fluffy things, very slight angst. This fic lacks smut, but my content is intended for an adult audience, MDNI.

Word Count: 1k

“You can take my chair,” your best friend, Noah, pushes his gaming chair in your direction. You thank him and shyly slide into his chair. You notice your feet slightly dangle above the carpet in his bedroom.

Noah had pulled in a chair from his dining table and sat next to you excitedly while pulling up his account to go live.

“Y/N, I’m so fuckin’ happy you agreed to stream with me today,” he exclaims while clicking about his screen. “It’s been forever since we’ve gotten to hang together just us two, huh?” He smiles, turning to look at your face.

You smile back, of course, even though you couldn’t keep yourself from fidgeting in your seat out of nervousness. Well it won’t just be the two of us, you think. This was your first time on stream with him and you noticed from past streams that his viewers. always loved when he had a guest on; you just hope they’ll love you too.

“You ready?” He asks.

“Mhmm,” is what you manage before he clicks “Start Streaming” and a window with “Stream Starting Soon” pops up in front of you.

“I’ll just give, like, five minutes for people to start coming in before we actually start,” he reassures. “What did you want to do on stream? Your choice since it’s your first time.” He leans in towards you.

“We could do—“, you hum and your eyes search across his bedroom for ideas. Your eyes land on his thigh. He’s wearing shorts today and his Itachi tattoo sparks your idea.

“You’ve never done a tattoo tour have you?” You smile excitedly.

“You just want me to take off my shirt, huh?” He laughs and sways into your shoulder.

You blush. Of course I do, you think. “I’m being serious! Also, isn’t that TOS? I don’t think you can flash your nips online, Noah.”

He laughs, “Fine, I think it’s a good idea. I’ll show off as long as you show yours too.” He points toward your forearms.

“Noah,” you whine. “They don’t know me. They’re not interested in mine.”

“Well you better get ready, because we’re starting.”

In less than a second, your faces appear on the screen along with his stream layout.

Comments started off with “heys and hellos”, but got a little apprehensive to you after a minute.

I thought it would just be you :/

Wishing that were me omg

Who’s the girl?

Noah introduces you to his viewers, “Hello hello. This is Y/N, they’re my company for today. She’s been one of my best friends for years and she came up with today’s stream idea. We’ll both be showing off our tattoos, talking about them, and answering questions if you have them.”

You spent an hour with him as he showed off his neck, arms, and hands to the camera. You watched as his fingers brushed against his own skin to show different parts of his arms. You can’t help but imagine his hands caressing you in the same way.

As time passed, you and Noah shared flirtatious banter and inside jokes. The comments started to warm up and even encouraged the way you two interacted.

Aww love that he gave her his chair, so cute

The way he looks at her omg

She can’t stop looking at his hands SAME

You read the comments as they floated up his screen. While it warmed your heart to know that his fans felt comfortable about your relationship with Noah, you couldn’t help but have negative thoughts intrude your mind about what could happen if you ever pursued him.

“Y/N, show some of yours,” he whispers to you once he’s finished. Before you can retaliate, he softly places a hand on your arm. He turns it to the inside, which shows an illustrated piece of a black cat right under the crease of your elbow.

So cuuuute

Love! I also have a cat tattoo

You smile toward the sweet comments in chat. Noah gives you a look of I told you so before mentioning that they’d be ending the steam after you showed off the tattoos you felt comfortable with.

— — —

The stream has ended and you’re left sitting in silence with him next to you.

“So, what’d you think?” He pushes his hair back before finally looking at you from his screen. “Hey, are you feeling okay?”

He watches as you frown and deny eye contact. He reaches across your lap to put a hand on your knee. He pulls you and you spin to face him so your knees touch.

“Will you please talk to me?”

“Yeah, I’m sorry,” you mutter. “It’s just— a lot of different feelings came up for me, and I don’t know what to think.”

“Like what? The chat, my fans, they loved you. I thought you were having as much fun as I was. I saw you smiling when they said we were cute together.” He grins while placing his hands in yours. You look down at them in your lap.

“I want to be cute together in more than just a friend way,” you admit. “I’m sorry.” You shut your eyes and squeeze his hands.

“Please don’t apologize for that, Y/N,” he huffs. His thumb brushes back and forth against the back of your hand, “I feel the same way, but I guess was scared to admit that, too.”

You explain to him how the idea of ruining your friendship haunts you or how he might feel pressure to have you in the public eye. “I just wish I told you so much sooner. It would have made things easier.”

“I’m ready to try now if you are.” He smiles softly while wiping a tear from your cheekbone. “In fact, I know where a couple of nerds like us could go on our first date,” he gushes and raises his brows teasingly.

You already know you’re headed to your favorite arcade bar with him at your side by the weekend. The thought of you being able to be closer than ever calms your nerves and gives you hope for your future together.

[prettygirl-gabi]

Partners-In-Crime

---

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Rating: General Audiences

Warning: angst (like very substantial amount), fluff, happy ending

Category:F/M

Fandom: Seventeen (SVT), boyband

Relationships: !idol Mingyu x !idol f reader

Summary: In a whirlwind of fake dating to avoid breached contract lawsuit, Mingyu and Y/n navigate growing feelings, blurring lines between pretend and real.

Trope: Fake dating

---

Hiiiii everyone who is reading! Welcome to the ninth installment of my new mini series called "Oi! Not this again!" They do not have to be read together or in order! I hope you all enjoy!

I never really thought I’d find myself in this situation: fake dating one of the hottest idols in South Korea. Yet, here I am, sipping an iced caramel macchiato in a corner cafe, pretending that being next to Mingyu from SEVENTEEN is the most natural thing in the world. In reality, my heart is racing, and not in the good way.

“Y/N, could you, like, pretend to be happy?” Mingyu whispers through a tight smile, his voice barely audible over the ambient music and chatty customers. His dark eyes flicker with a mix of annoyance and desperation.

“I am happy,” I snap quietly, struggling to adjust the fake smile plastered on my face. “Well, as happy as I can be, considering I’m fake dating you.”

A little louder than intended, I notice a few heads turn our way. I can feel the pressure mounting. We’re supposed to be the doting couple everyone envies, yet the tension between us is thicker than the whipped cream on my drink.

His fingers drum impatiently on the table, the dull thud echoing my pounding heart. “This was your idea, remember? To throw off the media frenzy surrounding both of us.”

Sure, using the classic “fake dating” trope to divert media attention seemed brilliant in theory. We both had enough scandals and rumors hovering around us to last a lifetime. Pairing up would squash at least half of them.

Mingyu suddenly leans in, looking intently at the menu stuck between the salt and pepper shakers, but I know he isn’t paying attention to the array of overpriced sandwiches. “Y/N, if we don’t pull this off, Dispatch is going to have a field day. Again.”

I sigh, slumping back in my chair. “I know, I get it. But couldn’t we have found another way?”

He opens his mouth to argue but instead, a genuine laugh escapes his lips. “Like what? Publicly announce we’re focusing on our careers and ask for privacy?” The sarcasm in his voice isn’t lost on me.

“Okay, fair point.” I roll my eyes but can’t help a small smile. “So what’s the plan now, Mr. Perfect?”

His grip tightens on the table edge before he looks up with a smirk. “We’ve got a photoshoot tomorrow morning for a ‘couple’ branding campaign. We just need to act like we’re head-over-heels for each other, got it?”

I groan inwardly. Nothing like forced intimacy to kickstart a beautiful, fake relationship. “This is going to be a disaster.”

“Only if you make it one,” he teases, his smirk widening. He leans back in his chair, crossing his arms smugly. “Or maybe you’re just afraid you’ll actually fall for my irresistible charm?”

I snort. “Keep dreaming, pretty boy.”

==

The next morning arrives faster than I’d like. The cosmetics studio is buzzing with activity. Staff members rush around, juggling makeup palettes and camera equipment, their energy palpable.

“Y/N! Mingyu! Over here!” the director waves us over to a pristine white set, where we’re expected to coo and swoon

“Showtime,” Mingyu whispers in my ear. His peppermint breath sends an involuntary shiver down my spine. This fake boyfriend thing is harder than it looks.

I force a smile, slipping my fingers through his as we pose for the cameras. Each flash feels like a dagger, reminding me this isn’t real. But for the sake of our careers, we plaster on the affection.

“Y/N, could you look at Mingyu like he’s the best thing that ever happened to you?” the photographer instructs, eyes focused behind the lens.

Like he’s the best thing that ever happened to me? Easy. I turn, my gaze softening as if on cue. As much as Mingyu frustrates me, he’s also been my confidant and partner-in-crime through this chaotic idol life. Maybe this won’t be so hard after all.

Mingyu meets my eyes, his expression unexpectedly tender. The lines of his face soften, making the acting feel less like an act.

We’re mid-pose when Mingyu decides to speak. “You know, you’re not as bad at this as I thought you’d be,” he says, his voice just loud enough for me to hear.

I raise an eyebrow, still maintaining my “loving” gaze for the photographer. "What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Oh, nothing. Just that maybe we should fake date more often. You’re adorable when you’re pretending.”

I falter, the smile slipping slightly. “Watch it, Mingyu.”

==

The hours pass and the shoot finally wraps. We receive a round of applause for our “chemistry,” and Mingyu pulls me into a side hug, his hand resting on my shoulder. Pretending becomes so much easier with each click of the camera.

“Good job today,” he murmurs, his voice barely above a whisper, tinged with genuine warmth.

For a moment, I almost forget we’re pretending. Almost.

“We pulled it off, didn’t we?” I muse, pressing my temple against his arm briefly before pulling away.

“Yeah,” he admits, his eyes locking onto mine. “We make a pretty good team, Y/N.”

Something in his gaze makes my heart stutter. It feels like he’s trying to say more, like he’s testing unfamiliar waters.

“Yeah, well don’t get used to it. This is still a temporary arrangement.” I remind myself more than him, with a fleeting half-smile.

==

Weeks roll by, and the line between fiction and reality starts to blur. Mingyu and I are inseparable, seen at award shows, interviews, seen leaving our "shared" house, and even the occasional late-night ramen shop. The media loves us. Fans dub us “the power couple of the decade.”

One evening, as we rehearse a choreographed routine for an upcoming awards show performance, the tension boils over. Mingyu’s patience breaks first.

“Y/N, you’re a step behind!” he snaps, frustration evident as he stops mid-spin. “We’ve done this a thousand times, what’s going on with you?”

Anger flares in my chest. “I’m sorry if I'm not perfect like you, okay?”

He throws his hands up in exasperation. “It’s not about being perfect, it’s about working together!”

“You think I don’t know that?!” I shout back, breathless. “This whole thing...it's draining, Mingyu. Maybe fake dating wasn't the best idea after all. Maybe…”

“Maybe what?” he challenges, stepping closer. “Maybe we should just end it? Announce it was all a prank?”

The space between us crackles with unspoken words, and I take a small step back, my chest heaving. “Maybe.”

His eyes search mine, the anger simmering into something else entirely—something raw and real. “And what if I don’t want it to end?”

Time stands still as his words hang in the air. The intensity in his gaze makes my heart race for an entirely different reason.

“What exactly are you saying?” I finally ask, needing clarity even if it feels terrifying.

He takes a deep breath, before lifting my head with his thumb on my chin and two under. “I’m saying...I don’t think this was ever just fake for me. And I don’t want it to be.”

My breath catches. Neither of us moves. The air feels charged and heavy with possibility.

“Me neither,” I admit, my voice barely a whisper, finally understanding the depth of my feelings.

A slow, almost relieved smile spreads across his face, and he reaches for my hand, linking our fingers together much like the first time we “acted” in love. Only now, it feels unforced, genuine.

The journey to real from fake has been messy, fraught with disagreements and tension, but standing here, looking into his eyes, I realize it was worth every moment.

“Looks like we’ve got a new script to follow,” Mingyu murmurs, his thumb caressing the back of my hand.

I smile, leaning into the comforting warmth of his presence. “Yeah, and this time, we don’t have to pretend.”

■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■

‐Thank You For Reading!🩵🩶

-prettygirl-Gabi✨️🎀

[froggiewrites]

Picture You (4/4)

Pairing: Sanji x Reader, Zoro x Reader

NSFW

Summary: The crew is celebrating their latest victory when they find you on their laps, drunk and clingy and affectionate, begging for attention. Sanji and Zoro both deal with a clingy drunk, and have deal with the unwanted feelings it brings from deep within them. Warnings: Smut, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Zoro has a bit of a size kink, he's also a bit possessive, Hurt/Comfort Word Count: 3.4k Crossposted from Ao3 Previous Chapter

Zoro is brooding when she finds him, of course. Glaring at the sea like it’s wronged him somehow, a glare fierce enough to send anyone running. Even knowing him as she does she almost wants to turn tail and climb right back down the ladder. His eyes shift to her, and she can see them soften ever so slightly, his hands unclenching from the fists he was holding them in. She doesn’t need to be afraid of Zoro. Not her, not ever.

He lets out a displeased grunt when she takes her final step into the crow’s nest, but he’s looking at her. That’s something, she tells herself. “Hey, Zoro.”

“Hey.” His voice is tight, and someone who knows him less would think it was unfriendly, but she knows better. She’s spent hours with him, fighting back to back, and she knows him well enough to see the slight blush on his cheek and know all of this tension is from embarrassment. For all of the confidence he exudes, Zoro has never been good with people, never gotten particularly close with them. What happened last night was probably uncharted territory for him, she realizes. The crew, her wonderful dear friends, all struggled with normal human interaction, sharing a lot of firsts together. She realizes that this was almost certainly a first for Zoro. He had probably never cuddled someone before, let alone in front of an audience. Was this the first time he had held hands with someone else, fingers interlocked?

No wonder he had run. She’s surprised he maintained his composure enough to stay with her the entire night. He was probably nervous and confused, and had no idea what to do or say the next day.

“Can I sit with you? For a bit?”

“Hmm.” He barely lets out a grunt, but he adjusts to make room for her all the same. Just another in a sea of small concessions he makes for her, small gestures that speak so much louder than his words ever would. She sits down next to him, close enough for their knees to brush together, and she feels a small flutter when he doesn’t shift away.

They sit in silence for a while, not as comfortable as their usual but not nearly as tense as she had expected. He closes his eyes, shifting his head back, but she can tell he isn’t actually asleep. She can’t tell if he’s pretending for his sake or for hers. They both relax all the same.

Her voice is barely a whisper when it breaks the silence. “Zoro?”

He lets out a soft hum.

“Are you mad at me?”

“No.” The response is quick, firm, and final.

“Good.”

A couple more beats of silence.

“Can I sit on your lap again?”

He chokes on his own spit. “What?” 

His voice is harsher than he intends, and she almost loses her nerve, but she quietly reminds herself that this is his default when he gets nervous or embarrassed. He doesn’t know how else to respond. “Can I sit on your lap? It’s okay if you don’t want me to, I just–” her cheeks flush, and she looks away from him. “I just thought it might be nice. To be close again.”

His eyes bore into her, searching, considering. He wonders if she’s teasing him somehow, but her voice is calling out again in his head. I’m lonely, Zoro. He sees her big doe eyes, begging him to help her. Before he realizes it, he’s spread his arms out for her, welcoming. She practically runs into his lap, scared he’ll change his mind, and he has her held firmly against his chest in an instant. His eyes are anywhere but on her, his face aflame, but she’s in his arms, safe and happy, and he can’t help it if his heart flutters a bit at the idea.

She rests her cheek against his chest, eyes fluttering closed, practically purring. He rests his chin on the top of her head, both to hold her closer and to ensure she can’t see the embarrassment that might show on his face. She tries to wrap her arms around him, but he’s pinned her so tightly she can’t really move. Not hard enough to hurt, just…firm. In control.

“Thank you.” He can feel her smile against his chest as she says it.

“Hm. This isn’t something you have to thank me for.” He keeps his voice controlled, softer, fighting his instinct to get gruff in his embarrassment. His hand starts rubbing small circles on her back, and she hums quietly.

“But I want to anyway.” She leaves the I know this is hard for you out, knowing it will make him pull back, shy away. Zoro is not a man who likes to admit when he’s struggling. Ever the protector, the warrior, the guard dog. She wants him to know that he can let down those walls, that he’s allowed a little softness, but that is a discussion for later. There’s more obvious things to address, for today. “Why did you run away from me this morning?”

He tenses, but does not move. “I didn’t run away.”

“You’re not a very good liar.” He’s grateful for the slight laugh in her voice, the smile he can both hear and feel calming him down enough to keep his composure.

“I needed–I had to go on watch. For…safety.” He winces at his own fumbling.

“We never have anyone on watch during meals, Zoro.”

“We should. I’m starting.”

“No, you aren’t.” Her voice is firm.

His turns teasing. “Oh, I’m not?”

“No, you aren’t. You aren’t going to stop hanging out with us to brood up here.”

“I don’t brood.” She can hear the pout in his voice.

“You love brooding. You do it all the time. You were literally just brooding before I got here.”

He lets out a hmph that shows his displeasure but does nothing for his argument. He just leans them both back a bit further, resting against the wall, holding her close. She lets the silence linger.

His fingers continue their ministrations on her back, relaxing and strangely intimate. They both start to slow their breathing, and it doesn’t take long for his fingers to slowly glide to a stop as he begins snoring above her. She leans into him, listening to his soft and steady heartbeat as it lulls her to sleep.

They don’t nap for long, no more than an hour, surely, but it’s the best sleep she’s had in quite a while. She stirs, and pulls back to see Zoro woke up before her. He sat here for however long, just holding her.

“Sleep well?” His voice is a little scratchy, and her thighs clench a little. Unfortunately since she is practically straddling him, he feels it too. His eyes show a brief panic, before he quickly covers it with teasing. “Oh, that for me?”

Her cheeks heat, but she plays along. “And what if it is?”

A beat of silence as he adjusts to the idea. “Just for me?” His voice is thick. But then another thought strikes him, and he pulls back a bit. “Not for the cook?”

She’s relieved he brought it up first. “Would that bother you?”

“If you were thinking about another man in my lap?”

“Oh, no, um–” she falters, “Not right now, no. Just like, in general?”

“If you were into both of us, in general?” He ponders a moment. Zoro has never thought himself the jealous type, just the kind of person who is defensive over his things and his people. He didn’t like the idea of another man having her, keeping them apart. But sharing? An interesting proposal. He thinks of the cook holding her, as he is now, with the thought that she would still return to him. He doesn’t feel the ache in his chest he expects. He then has a few more images flash through his head, of her pressed between them, moaning and begging, so overwhelmed she can’t even call out either of their names. He can’t keep the lustful smile from his face as heat rushes downward. “I think I could live with that.”

“Really?” Her face lights up.

“I don’t think I’m the one you’d have to worry about with that.”

“Sanji’s okay with it.”

“You two talked about it?” He’s a little surprised, he’ll admit. He didn’t think the chef would be willing to share. Even more lewd possibilities fill his mind, ones that make his cock harden further. Her mouth full of him, forced further down with Sanji’s thrusts. Her moans around his shaft, the feeling of it. God, maybe it isn’t just something he could live with. Maybe he could want it. “Good. Saves a conversation.”

She lets out a sigh of relief. “This went so much better than I expected. I’m so glad, Zoro. I care about you so much.”

He tenses under her as his mind is sharply redirected from his fantasies. “That so?” He would never admit how his heart skipped when she said that. Nor would he admit to the small, lovesick smile that made its way onto his face.

“Yeah.” Her own smile is just as full of fondness. She slides forward again, her lips brushing lightly against his. She adjusts so her knees rest on either side of his waist, her thighs against his. She can feel his hardness, and to test the waters brushes lightly against it. He juts up his hips to meet her, and he’s proud to say she moans first.

He smirks down at her. “You feel that?” She lets out a soft whine as he thrusts again. “That’s all for you. You wanna feel more?”

She nods, but his hands come down to her hips to stop her from grinding down on him. “Use your words, baby. You have to speak up.”

She whimpers. “Please, I wanna feel more.” She’s still trying to grind down, and at her words, he lets her. He can feel how wet she is through her pants, the dampness making its way through the fabric. He wants to tease her more, but he also desperately needs to feel her wrapped around his cock.

His hands reach under her shirt, sliding it up over her head and revealing her body to him. She thrusts her chest out, begging him silently to touch her, but he just chuckles, reaching back to unclasp her bra and throw it aside. She leans forward more, trying to tempt him, and he laughs again. “Your words.”

“Touch me, Zoro.”

And he does. His large, calloused hands grope at her chest, pinching and squeezing in time to his thrusts. His touch is somehow both harsh and gentle, so fitting for a man so unyielding but who can be so very tender. His mouth begins on her neck, biting and sucking, trying to leave as many marks as he possibly can. He wants to see it, proof that she’s his. That this is happening. That this is real.

He finds her sweet spot, bringing a high mewl from her lips, one that surely can be heard from the deck below. She’s too lost in the feeling to care, and he’s too proud to bring himself to feel embarrassed. He almost hopes that they can hear it, that they know what they’re doing. That he’s making it happen.

“Zo–Zoro!” She cries so sweetly, so beautifully. By the time he’s done, he’ll make sure that’s all she can say, if she can speak at all. “Zoro, please! More!”

He chuckles cruelly. “More? You’re getting a bit greedy, aren’t you?” He holds himself back from ripping off the rest of their clothes and pounding her into the ground like an animal. There will be time for that yet.

“Please!” She grinds down harder, and her mouth leans forward to take his. Her hands tug at his shirt frantically. She feels like she’ll die if she doesn’t feel more of him, all of him, every single inch. Her hands grope at his chest, his abs, hands sliding under his shirt to trace his scars. She wants to know him, totally and completely, and be known in return. She breaks the kiss to once again beg. “Please, Zoro. I want to really feel you.”

How could he turn down such a request? He slowly raises his shirt above his head, not pausing his thrusts for a moment, slowly revealing his body to her. She’s seen him shirtless dozens of times, but it still takes her breath away. He’s so beautiful, every inch of his sturdy and strong. She feels so weak next to him, so small and delicate. It’s not a feeling she’s used to, but it’s one she’s beginning to relish in. After taking off his shirt, he grabs her hips and lifts her like she’s nothing. She lets out a noise of complaint, but he shushes her. “Didn’t you want to really feel me?”

He sets her down on her back, the cool wood making her shudder. His fingers slide below the waistband of his pants, and she sits at attention. He can see hunger and want in her face, fueling his own desires. He slides both his pants and underwear down in one smooth motion, his cock standing at attention the moment it’s freed.

“God,” she moans quietly. “God, you’re beautiful. God you’re–you’re so–”

“Big?” The grin on his face is smug, his voice taunting, but she can’t bring herself to be angry.

“Yeah,” she says breathlessly. “Big.” She instinctively reaches for him, wanting to feel it heavy and hard in her hand, but he pins her by her wrists the moment she tries.

“Tsk. Not so fast.” He towers over her, slowly pressing their chests together. “You don’t just get to take what you want, sweetheart.”

Her voice is pleading. “Please, can I touch your cock?”

“Hmm…” he presses closer to her as he pretends to consider. “I don’t think so. Not now.”

She whines, “Please, Zoro.”

He tsks at her. “It can’t be all about you, babe. I get what I want, too. And right now, I want to fuck you so hard into this floor you forget everything but my name.”

She lets out an unashamed, wanton moan. He takes that as agreement, keeping her wrists pinned with one hand and using the other to slide her out of her pants and panties. He stays up for a moment to admire her, lust in his eyes briefly becoming something softer. She’s beautiful like this, the sunlight on her skin and dancing in her hair. She looks like an angel.

He’ll fix that.

He lines himself up with her entrance, keeping his eyes locked on hers while he does it. She’s making the most pathetic little noises even before he fills her, just begging wordlessly to be touched, for him to make good on his promise.

He enters her all at once, bottoming out in a single moment. She squeals, squirming, unable to decide if she wants to move closer or run away. He leans down, removing the hand on her wrists only to intertwine both his hands with hers and press her even deeper into the wood below them. They’re chest to chest, her tits rubbing his pecs, and every bit of friction is a heavenly torture.

“Are you ready?” Every part of his body is tense from holding back, but he still checks in on her.

“Yes. Please fuck me Zoro, please.”

He pulls out before slamming their hips together so hard she almost cries out in pain. His pace is immediately brutal, unyielding as he is in every other part of his life. He presses her hard into the ground, filling all of her senses, leaving her with nothing but him. The feel of his skin, his scent, the sounds of his quiet moans. It’s all him, the world outside the crow’s nest might as well have stopped existing. He kisses her, hard and fast, teeth clacking together and tongues intertwining.

But as rough as he is in every other aspect, the hands holding hers are gentle, the press of their palms together a soft grounding point for her to focus on when the rest becomes too much. He holds her like she’ll break under his weight, and she knows that as unrestrained he may seem, he is completely and totally in control of both of them right now. He could probably break her beneath him with his thrusts if he wanted to, but each one manages to toe the line between pleasure and pain. Never too much, never enough to hurt, but always enough to keep the heat in her building. Always enough to make her moan against his lips, to keep her hips stuttering against his desperately.

He breaks their kiss as they both grow closer to their release, grunting against her ear. “Tell me who’s fucking you like this. Tell me who you want. Who you need.”

“Zoro!”

“Good. Now tell the world. Loud as you can, sweetheart.”

“Zoro!”

He can’t help the pride that blooms in his chest and the smirk on his face. It’s all him. He’s making her cry out like this. His name. He’s making her come undone beneath him. And he’s going to fill her to the brim.

“There you go. Just like that.” She keeps crying out, his name turning to meaningless babbles, and he releases one of her hands to bring his down to her clit. He’s holding himself back, determined to cum at the same time. To share their ecstasy, to have her look him in the eyes and feel his cum fill her at the same time she comes undone around him.

After only a few seconds they’re there, their moans so loud he’s convinced it could be heard all across the Grand Line. He feels her squeeze around him, feels his cock twitch within her, and he brings his mouth down to bite her shoulder. One final mark, one final reminder.

Their chests both heave as they sit in silence for a few moments, coming down from their highs. He rolls off of her, pulling out, only to pull her onto his chest. His fingers run through her hair, and he brings his lips to her forehead like it’s the most natural thing in the world. They’re staring at each other, simply taking in the feeling of being together.

She wants to say it to him then, those three little words. She knows they both feel it, as they lay together, looking into each other’s eyes. She so badly wants to say it. But she fears it’ll scare him away, that it will be too much for him and that this beautiful, delicate thing they’ve made together will shatter under the weight of her words.

She doesn’t say it, not yet. Not until he’s ready. But a lot can be communicated in a look, in a smile, in a gentle caress. She can see it in his face that he knows, even if he won’t acknowledge it aloud. That’s enough, for now.

They lay, enjoying each other's presence for a while, before she can see in his face he’s about to doze off in the peace of it all. His eyes have drifted closed, his face relaxing in a way it only does when he’s unconscious.

“Zoro?”

“Hm?”

“We should probably clean up and get dressed. Before someone comes up here to get us for dinner.”

“Ugh.” They’re both caked in sweat, but she supposes for him that’s pretty normal. “Why do we have to?”

“We’re kind of gross right now.”

“So?”

She sighs. “We could take a bath.”

“No.”

“We could take a bath together.”

His eyes open at that. “Hm.” He sits up slowly, taking her with him, and they gather up their clothes, sliding them on at a relaxed pace. She tries to ignore the cum getting on her panties. There’s not really anything else to wipe it up with up here.

When they make their way back on the deck, his hand finds the small of her back to guide her to the bathroom. A small gesture, but one that says so much. A small touch that reminds her I’m here, it’s alright.

As they strip down again in the steam of the bathroom, his hands tenderly undressing her, she looks forward to many more small gestures, ones that say the words she knows they’re both thinking.