#which just means i want to watch it when I'm in a mindset to appreciate it

[thatwitchrevan]

I did vote for Stede just for fun but honestly any character from Black Sails would kill him easily except for an absolute comedy of errors.

[misctf]

Hey I've always been a pudgy and geeky type of guy and now at 50 I wish I had done things different. Could you change reality so I've always been a bear or daddy or age regress me so I'm a jock or himbo?

Are you sure you want this? I mean, I appreciate where you’re coming from. Really, I do. But are you sure? There’re risks and.... Okay I’ll spare you the details. You seem pretty set on this.

Cracks fingers.

Where to start... 50 years old, a tad pudgy, and I can tell that Star Wars shirt you’re wearing hasn’t been washed in a while. Not to worry!

Snaps fingers. The cold air now caressing your naked body.

Much better! Now I can see what I’m working with. Stay still please.

You feel my hands run along your pudgy, hairy gut. You wince as I give it a squeeze. You watch as I saunter behind you and yelp when I tug at the back hair that wraps up and around your shoulders. And as my hand runs along the thinning hair on your head, you gasp as a pressure emanates from within your brain.

Ah...Interesting... I can see it. Who you want to be... Okay, okay. This is gonna be tough, but just take a deep breath. And before I begin, you should know I set my clients up for success, which means... So... right... You’re full steam ahead. Sounds good!

You wince when I firmly grab your flabby chest and start massaging. A groan escapes your lips and you watch as the fat melts from your chest, leaving it flat. But with another squeeze, you watch as my hands begin to fill again. This time with your new muscle tit flesh. Bigger and bigger, until my hands can’t contain them. Firm and bounceable. Simultaneously, your skin heats up as your chest and back hair vanish, leaving you clean shaven. You watch as I give your nipples a squeeze and... the pleasure nearly knocks you off your feet. You moan as I pinch them between my fingers.

Like that? Yeah I can tell. I made them extra sensitive. Like so sensitive that the fabric of a shirt might make you cum. Oh don’t give me that look. Trust me, you’ll want to show off what I’m giving you. Okay... let’s...

My hands run along your abdomen and you feel like the wind is knocked out of you. The pudgy gut you sported before is starting to melt. Painful at first, but when you see the six pack you’re now sporting, you grin. But it’s short lived. You feel my hands firmly grip your ass. And this time, you moan as you feel your flabby ass firm up, filling with firm, bouncy fat and muscle. An ass that’ll always turn heads. And when I give your bubble butt a gentle slap, you moan loudly.

Yeah... what can I say? I want you to really enjoy your new body. Yeah... okay... I get you’re horny. Like hornier than you’ve ever been. But you’re turning out so well. We can’t stop now! Oh! Look at that! Your skin is starting to tan! See? We just need to get started and the rest follows. It’s like your body knows what its destined to become. But we’re missing something...

I run my hands up and down your arms, filling each of them with muscle. And then more. And then even more. They feel heavier to you. Bulging as if you’d just done curls for days. My hands don’t even come close to being able to wrap around them. And your shoulders... you’d never thought the whole ‘shoulders like boulders’ would ever apply to you. Now you’re a shining example.

Yeah, I know. Damn, dude. And I should ask... what’s your skin care routine? I jest, I jest. You’re 21, of course you have great skin! Haha you look so happy! Beats being 50, right? Oh! Before I forget...

You watch as I pull out a baseball cap and slap it on your head. Beneath it, you feel a burning sensation as your thinning hair grows in rapidly. And a few blond curls poke out from beneath your new hat.

So, what do you think? Of course, of course. I told you I’d help. And god, I gotta say you turned out hot. Now, I did tell you earlier that I set my clients up for success. And right now, you might have the body, but do you have the mindset? Okay, calm down... I did say there were risks, right? And I can’t let you ruin my work. Just stay still and...

You feel my hand on your head. And another around your growing cock.

Right... how does computer science fit into the new you? Or comic books? Okay, let’s get rid of that... and let’s move this here... and... Hey you good? You’re drooling all over yourself.

I give your cock a few tugs. A moan escapes your lips.

Phew! We’re still here. Right... okay let’s get rid of that... definitely get rid of this... Perfect! It’ll take a bit of space for all the knowledge to maintain this look. You’ll need most of your brain dedicated to workouts and diet. And since I doubt academics is your ticket to success, I might as well give you the knowledge to set up a successful OnlyFans account. Have any problems with that? I didn’t think so.  

I tug again on your cock, the pleasure somehow even more intense and your eyes roll back into your head.

Alright, but deep down you’re still that geeky guy. But with a body like this, it would be a waste not to have the right mindset for it. So, you get the idea? Shirtless, cocky, alpha douchebag. No more quiet geeky nerd. Yeah... look at that smirk. You’re getting it, now.

You flex in the mirror, the smirk never leaving your face. And then you turn back to me, gesturing toward your raging erection.

Well, what can I say. I.... Oh... Well, I mean if you insist. Might as well finish what I started. On my knees? Oh, okay... You want me to stop talking? Alright I.......

And as your cock meets the back of my throat and your moans fill the room, I couldn’t help but wonder if adding another douchey alpha bro to the world was worth it.

[11cupids-tarot11]

What has your future spouse been dreaming about lately?

For the divine feminine seeking the divine masculine •°. *࿐

1 -> 4

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Get to know me more and follow my Instagram!

I'm open for readings!

2 questions for $5.55 until July 4th!

Cash app and PayPal only

DM for private readings

Tips appreciated!

C@sh tag $minnieplant3

P@yPal @janellec03

☆

Pile 1- The Chariot, Two of Swords, The Hanged Man

I'm getting the feeling your spouse really wants to make a move on you! He's dreaming about what it's like to be all in your space, he really wants to know what you're like. I was thinking at first that maybe he wants to spend time with you and know what it would be like to do mundane things with you like grocery shopping, but I think this guy is more curious than that. I think he wants to know just about you in general and what you like doing, he's the type to watch what you pick up and glance at during shopping just to get a feel of what you like. He wants to know your schedule, how your day went, he'll probably ask this a lot.

I feel like this person has a crush on you? He feels kinda stuck, like the hanged man lol. I'm not sure the circumstances or the dynamic of the relationship/how you'll come together but it surely feels like this person is very secretive with his thoughts of you, like he's very open telling me but he's scared to tell you? Like maybe this is someone you know of and you guys are friends and they're secretly crushing lol, that was very specific so it's okay if it doesn't resonate with everyone. This could also be a secret admirer for some.

But he's dreaming about changing something with you, planting roots and something stable. I'm not sure what the change will be, but I am seeing him thinking of different approaches to overcome whatever hardship is happening between you two, it could also be something on their end like maybe shadow work still needs to be done or they're still dealing with a karmic relationship of some sort.

It seems to me like they're sorting through everything, they might fantasize about things finally coming to an end and being able to start something with you. I know as soon as this is finished they're spreading towards you. I think they really just want you to know they're still coming? I got this rush feeling, like an adrenaline rush feeling? I think this person just wants you to know they're still clearing through some things! "Just hang in a little longer!" I'm hearing with a cute little smiley face ☺️. Your person is adorable! I think they love acts of service too!

I think if this were to be a 18+ reading they'd definitely tell you about all of the things they'd love to focus on your body and needs lol.

I have to make an 18+ version of this now 😂 stay tuned!

Don't forget to do the poll below! Talk again soon!!

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

Pile 2- Six of Coins, Eight of Swords in reverse, The moon, Temperance, Ten of Cups.

Your person dreams about spoiling you, pampering you, taking you out on really fancy dates (plus showing you off 😵‍💫) just treating you like you are their everything. I hear it's because you are their everything! They adore you so much!

This person talks a lot too and wanted to pull extra cards when I usually only do a three card pull spread lol.

This card makes me feel like your person kinda feels like a spider stuck in it's own web right now, they're really in their head :( I getting your person has a negative mindset? For some of you it could be specific as they feel like they're not on the same level as you whatever that might mean to them. They dream about cutting out of their web, I think for the benefit of the connection really but also for their piece of mind, yk?

Maybe this person feels like they have to achieve a certain amount of wealth before they come to you, which goes hand in hand what I was saying about really wanting to spoil you lol they want to save up a bunch so they can have a great future with you and for those of you who want children they also want to build a family for you so of course they want to save for this too.

They dream about having a steady home with you, I think they like to fantasize about your future a lot lol. They say it won't be perfect but it'll be the definition of love like a real family should be lol. They want a balance with you, they're also the type to be very balanced in a relationship, they'll balance work and you at the same time. I honestly get the vibe that's why they're working so hard right now, so they can spend the rest of their time with you more!

I think this person dreams about the day you two unite! With the ten of cups I feel they dream about a happy home with you a lot, but also a happy relationship. I can guarantee this relationship will be very fulfilling and healing and loving. Their energy feels so excited to meet you if you guys haven't already, a healthy and loving relationship could be something they've always wished for so this is a wish fulfillment for them, they can't wait to experience real love with you. 🩵 The color blue might be specific for a few of you?

Don't forget to do the poll below! Talk to you soon love :))

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

Pile 3- Knight of Coins, Justice (clarification cards- Death, and Strength), Two of Wands, Seven of Cups (clarification cards- Ten of Cups), and King of Swords (clarification cards- Knight of Wands)

I needed so much clarification for this group xD

Every time I look at the ducks eyes they always look so full of administration, anyone else see it? It's adorable. I channeled right away your person will adore you like this picture so I chose it!

I heard they think about this every day straight away lol.

Your future spouse fantasizes about putting hard work into you, really showing up for you I'm feeling. Like I feel like it's deeper than a materialistic matter, I feel like he really wants to support you emotionally. He doesn't want to be your therapist or anything it's like he just wants to make sure you're okay, he really cares about your well being. A better way to put this is that they really want to show up as a man in your life, one that doesn't have a toxic sense of masculinity and really respects women and wants to understand your needs, wants and boundaries I'm hearing. He likes to solve your problems because your problems are his problems.

He's dreaming about justice in a situation, I'm going to pull clarification cards for the Justice card to help understand a bit better because I want to know possibly in what situation, I can't figure that out on my own I'm not hearing much channeling on this card. The clarification cards just are making me feel it's probably a too personal situation they don't want me to know about, but maybe when you meet this person you will know because it's making me feel like it's linked to you, he probably doesn't want you to understand much either right now but he says he's working hard on getting justice in a situation he really wants to come to an end soon, I think when it's over it'll bring a lot of happiness, a shift in energy, a really big change :) He wants you to encourage him to be strong as he encourages you, it's a very tough situation maybe? Heavy energy kind of just came through me, like a little random rush of sadness just thinking about the question so I will move on now :)

This person fantasizes about making everything perfect a lot in a way, he really likes to plan. You'll notice this about them right away lol. They probably have a hectic schedule right now I'm hearing. They're possibly planning on how to get to you? This feels like a soulmate connection, something that's just supposed to happen because it just makes so much sense because you two love each other and really care for one another. This is someone who you can spend the rest of your life with because they're confident you two are a perfect match. Very equal in the relationship which is why it would work perfectly I'm hearing. He's just doing a bunch of planning right now, lots of thinking things over and through.

He dreams about probably having a lot of money, a level of fame? Maybe he's a celebrity or wants to be, he could be very creative and expensive. He dreams a lot very dreamy they could have water in their chart, they do feel emotional. They're so cute 😭

This person dreams about picking a path and advancing in it basically, they really want to be the boss, be at the top of their game whatever career or field it might be. They want a lot of abundance! They fantasize about being given an opportunity to present themselves, show off maybe. They could be a really good singer/rapper or some kind of performer. They could play an instrument.

I feel like they really want to settle down with you for sure though, they want to offer you a lot as well so they work really hard to show up financially, they could've grown up in poverty I'm hearing a specific message for some of you so being financially stable is everything for them. They want you right by their side ;)

This person was kinda hard to read but I think that's cause how dreamy they felt, thoughts kinda bouncing around everywhere haha, so take this how it resonates with you!

Don't forget to do the poll below!! Talk to you soon!

｡ﾟ•┈୨♡୧┈• ｡ﾟ

Pile 4- Seven of Coins, The Magician (clarification cards- Three of wands), Seven of Wands (clarification cards- Death and Queen of Swords)

This person wants to start off with the seven of wands first even though it was the last card to be pulled lol.

They want to maybe draw attention to dreaming about fighting for something? They are very protective and will stand their ground and fight for what's theirs. I can't really tell, so I'm going to ask for clarification ;) I don't know why but I feel like they want to sabotage a relationship between you and someone else? I feel like they fantasize about this a lot! I feel like your energy is the Queen of wands but you don't really see this person! This could be a clue your future spouse is someone you already know!

They dream about making you theirs lol stealing you away. 😋

So with that, they're also dreaming about the future with you! Working on their finances as well, but also thinking about what it would be like in the future with you. This person feels like they're confident they will have a future with you lol. Maybe they're not making a move right now because they want to build up their finances more for the long run with you, because when they do make a move on you they plan to commit deeply and I'm hearing they fell hard for you, and you possibly don't even know it 😵‍💫.

😭 🩷 you probably drive this person crazy lmao

He's probably manifesting you lol?

I asked for clarification for the magician as well and it just makes me think he's really brainstorming a lot right now? I think every pile had a lot of thinking in them but never really being too specific on what and I'm always left with so much quietness so I'm left in the dark😭

They're just really thinking a lot which makes me think it's only about you. They seem shy, they could be younger than you? They seem like they're too scared to tell you how they really feel. Could be scared of rejection? But they really do fantasize about you a lot! They think about you constantly and different ways to impress you, how to get your attention. They really want you my pile 4's and they're fighting hard hehe. They won't back down either!

They think you're very pretty, like the bunny in the picture 😻. Hehe cute.

They might call you princess a lot, or other cute little pet names. They feel very affectionate, they have a lot of love to give! This person isn't someone to be scared of, they do care about you! It's not all about lust, there's love here as well as admiration! They do adore you!

Don't forget to do the poll below!! Talk again soon love!!

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

[lesbianphan]

I know this is gonna be mushy and overly emotional and I'm sorry for oversharing a bit, but I feel like it's necessary to put into words what rewatching We're All Doomed means to me personally. I watched the kiswe premiere event live and it was one of the most fun nights I've had in a while, even though my life felt extremely hopeless at the time.

And, look, here's the thing: when the WAD premiere dropped, I had completely given up on improving things. In fact, I was very much in the 'doomed' mentality. I had long accepted that there was no way my life would get better. So Dan's message really resonated with me: it's easy to settle for being at rock bottom and thinking that's all there is for me. I was happy to see Dan doing better, but deep down I didn't truly believe his words either, not really. I did want to, but I wasn't quite there. And I don't believe them all the time, as he himself said he doesn't, and doing the show many times hammers the point home into his head.

After experiencing it, I thought maybe, just maybe, I could stop only embracing the void, but start having the courage to exist as well. Putting myself out there more, trying to make a world for myself in which I'm not the :/ emoji all the time. So I applied for the jobs, I wrote what I wanted, I unapologetically embraced the nerdy things and the fandoms I enjoyed. I decided I can choose happiness in the smallest of ways, even when it sounds silly and unimportant. Because it isn't unimportant really if it means something to me.

Rewatching the show last night showed me how much it changed my life and the big leaps it helped me take in life. I have so much more to learn, but I keep telling myself to be brave (lmao sorry had to sneak the Phil reference) and have the courage to exist. Really truly exist out in the world, not hidden inside my room. And sure, some days are harder than the others, some days I really don't like myself at all. Even in those days, though, I tell myself: all I have to do is have the courage to exist.

I went in to watch WAD with no expectations, and I feel like the message of appreciating the little moments was so monumental, it truly absolutely had a huge impact in my own life. I have a job now, and some financial stability. To be honest, I never thought I'd get this job, I might not even have applied if I wasn't in this mindset. In so many ways, Dan and Phil have profoundly changed my life, and I think WAD is just one of those big examples.

I doubt the real humans Dan and Phil will ever understand the impact they've had on this world, but I'll forever wish them the best. I'll always support them, because their creations have irrevocably changed me as a person, and as much as I like joking around and stuff, I'm just thankful that we share this existence, and we get to have fun and be forever changed by it.

Thanks @danielhowell, you'll never know how huge the impact of this show was, but I am truly crying writing this and I hope one day I get to tell you in person how much you inspired me to keep going when no one else would.

[iris-sistibly]

I know I need to calm the fuck down first but one word to describe episode 6: STRESS!!

📍I love seeing Hyun-woo and Hae-in having a...sort of second honeymoon in Germany but I couldn't really enjoy every scene because I'm stressing out at how fucking OBLIVIOUS the Hong family is like bitch y'all are surrounded by snakes and they're so complacent 😭😭😭 I mean it's not really their fault that there are opportunists who'd earn their trust first then slither their way to bite them in the ass, but I just find it ironic at how protective they are at their family business and wealth but they can't see through the REAL people who has every intention to bring them down.

📍Speaking of which, I have read a fan theory somewhere that Mo Seul-hee is the mom of Eun-seong and Da-hye. Could be, OR Grace could be Da-hye's mom considering how Grace acted towards her. But why are they so keen at bringing the Hong family down?

📍Maybe it's just me but I don't think Da-hye is that bad, I have a feeling that she'll eventually come to her senses and take Hyun-woo's side and expose Eun-seong and co.

📍My overthinker/delulu self thinks that Soo-cheol and Da-hye's baby is actually Hyun-woo and Hae-in's kid. I mean, it wasn't shown how they lost their baby...yet. So Hae-in either miscarried, or she gave birth to a still born child? But what if the child is actually alive and one of those evil bitches cooked up some shit to make it seem like Hyun-woo and Hae-in's baby died, and then that baby was registered as Soo-cheol and Da-hye's kid? I know it sounds insane, but we're only on episode 6 so more crazy shit could happen in the future episodes, you'll never know. But my normal self says I've watched too many Filipino dramas growing up (and yes, that shit happens a lot in Filo-dramas).

📍Speaking of that kid, another theory is...what if that kid is actually Eun-seong and Da-hye's? Soo-cheol is a dumbass, and again, those bitches could have manipulated that baby's DNA test result or something. Again, that's just me being an overthinker, also I hate my Filo-drama mindset.

📍Aunt Beom-ja being so concerned about Hae-in and her dad but I also appreciate the fact that she respected her niece's request to not tell anyone about her illness. I also hope that she'll be able to help Hyun-woo clear his name and uncover Seul-hee and gang's dirty little secret.

📍BUT Y'ALL KNOW WHO STRESSED THE SHIT OUT OF ME THIS EPISODE? BAEK FUCKING HYUN-WOO!!! I am so freaking annoyed that he didn't tell Hae-in about the divorce when he had the chance. He was probably worried at how Hae-in would react plus the latter was going through medical treatments so he probably didn't want to put too much stress on her, but Hae-in was bound to find out either way so...yeah I do get why he chose to keep the divorce to himself but he could have just told the truth and suck it up, and perhaps they could communicate better when it comes to issues like this.

📍One thing I noticed about Hyun-woo is that he's brave in so many ways but also a coward on one thing. I mean he talks with Hae-in about nice things and all, and he is his wife's confidante, but I don't think I've ever heard him talk the way Hae-in does, meaning he never had the balls to talk to his wife about the..."unpleasant" side of their marriage. Hae-in was able to talk to him about her illness, the last will and testament that her mom pressured her to write, and Hyun-woo didn't even think about bringing up the divorce papers.

Prior to episode 5, I really thought that Hae-in was the one who shut him out but it was actually the other way around. Wifey may seem cold and nonchalant but if there's one person she'd listen to, it's him. Perhaps he doesn't want to say something that would upset Hae-in but the point is...she's his wife, she's supposed to know what he thinks, how he feels about certain things, even the not-so-pleasant side of their relationship. I really hope that in the next episode or the episode after that he'll be able to communicate better.

📍Hae-in's mom is terrible af. Imagine blaming your own daughter for the death of your son. I mean she didn't deserve to lose a child, but it's unfair to put all the blame on Hae-in (like why?). It's not like she endangered herself on purpose, and she had the audacity to be upset when Hae-in did something nice to her in-laws? Like what is wrong with this woman? Why can't see realize her own mistakes?

📍I kind of teared up when Hae-in was telling Hyun-woo about the things the latter should do when she dies. She could die, and this show might give us a bittersweet ending but when that time comes I'd be really, really hurt. Also, Hae-in confessing that the only reason she wrote her will about Hyun-woo not getting anything should they divorce was so that she'll be allowed to marry him 😭 (just shows she fought hard for him and she'll do absolutely anything to be with him). God I hate her mom! And yes the epilogue was so cute, now we know that they have always been in-love with each other. But I guess...they need a time-out 🤷.

📍Hae-in called Hyun-woo "yeobo" 🥹🥹🥹

[m1ssunderstanding]

Thank you for tagging me @glowing-gold and @crepesuzette2023 it's always fun to talk about writing with you guys.

How many works do you have on A03?

Five

What's your total word count?

141,094

What are your top five fics by kudos?

The Cast Iron Shore -- The Reeperbahn -- Fixing a Hole -- The Importance of Being Erstwhile -- Taking Trophies

Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I always respond eventually. I tend to go through self-hate spirals after posting things where I can't even acknowledge that the thing exists and looking at comments would be acknowledging that so i ignore everything for a long time. But. I will respond eventually because I sincerely appreciate comments. I love that people take the time to let me know what they liked. I'm sorry and I'm working on this!

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

Definitely Taking Trophies. It's literally just angry sex that resolves nothing.

What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

The Reeperbahn had to end gloriously golden for all the shit I put them through for all that time to be worth it.

Do you write crossovers?

Lol in high school I wrote a fic where Marius and Cosette are the Parents in Cinderella 2015. So no. The answer is no.

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Yes and it was the greatest day of my life.

Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Yes. My inclination is to go kinky but I try to keep it vaguely normal lol

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope:)

Have you ever had a fic translated?

Nope. That would be so cool!

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Not yet!

What's your all-time favorite ship?

Mclennon is the only thing I've actually ever shipped

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

The Mystery of the Missing Paul is what I've been calling it lately. It would just have to be so long in order to be done right and I'd want it done right, you know? It's just got to be novel length with actual novel amount of planning and development and structuring etc which I can't commit to unfortunately.

What are your writing strengths?

I mean everybody thinks this, but I think I really *get* both John and Paul and can put myself convincingly in their messed-up heads. As far as actual writing, I love to write dialogue. It's always what I write first, actually and comes pretty naturally.

What are your writing weaknesses?

Smut! Embarrassing but true. When some people talk about how difficult it is to write in a second language, I'm like yes! That sounds like me trying to write sex! And it's because only in the last few years of my life have I been breaking out of the puritanical mindset I was raised with. So while I love reading smut, writing it is extremely difficult for me.

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in fic?

basically my rule is this: if we were watching this, would there be subtitles provided on the screen? Or would we be able to get what they're saying from context clues? If it's the former, just say "in German" or something. If it's the later, and it's just a few lines, it's fine.

What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Les Miserables. That book took over my life for a few years. I wrote a 30k fix-it just for myself before I even knew people published fanfiction.

What's a fandom/ship you haven't written for but really want to?

I mean it's still in the Beatles, but I'd love to write a Linda/Yoko fic where they run away back to New York together and live their best independent artistic lives and raise Heather and Kyoko and go down in history as avant garde lesbians. John and Paul continue to bitch at each other tangentially and Yoko and Linda are unconcerned even though they both agree their exes are gay idiots. Maybe they decide to help them. Maybe they decide to Live and Let Die, who knows. But it would center on them.

tagging @adriennefrombrooklyn @eveepe @scurator @notgrungybitchin @saint-mona

[flagellant]

Hey, this is a weird and heavy question that could land you in hot water no matter which direction you answer in, so feel free to just ignore me, it's not imperative that you answer or anything. But I don't have a lot of kink-positive (or frankly sex-positive) people that I trust and you seem to have put a lot of time and work into that kind of stuff (or maybe it just comes naturally to you! Regardless, I value your opinion).

I don't know how to make my peace with age regression as a kink, or if I even need to. I've done a lot of unlearning when it comes to a sanitized, puritanical mindset that I was raised with. My general opinion now is "if no one's in danger of getting hurt just leave it be". But I can't help but see people who participate in age regression as a huge red flag- depending on their role in the situation. If I'm friends with someone and they tell me they have a "little" persona or whatever sure that makes me internally cringe but mostly I just feel bad for them because they almost always have trauma. (Baby talk makes me wanna barf but maybe that's a me problem). But when I learn that someone is into people who essentially act like a child or a baby in the bedroom, I'm gonna run for the fucking hills. That just seems like a giant red flag to me- if someone is able to get into a mindset where they can be sexual with someone who's acting like a child, I have a hard time feeling okay around that person.

I know you're no professional, and I'm not here to get validation. Like I said, I just value your insight and I'm wondering if you can introduce me to a new way of thinking about this. Am I wrong to write off someone for a sexual preference as long as it's technically between two consenting adults? Should I be challenging my thinking?

If you do take the time to answer this, know that I appreciate you so much. If you can't answer, I hope you have a good day anyways.

I feel as though relatively often there is confusion when it comes to the idea of kink positivity with regards to this sort of context. It can seem confusing or even impossible, because there are those who act as though being kink positive is the same thing as being personally anything-goes, fetishwise. It's just a matter of vocabulary--we hear "kink positive" and logically assume "we need to feel positive about this kink", right?

Except that's really not the case, no more than landback as a movement demands for creating native american ethnostates by "giving all the private property of america back". The reality is always a bit more complex.

For your specific example of age regression as a kink, it's a pretty common sentiment to just not like it and not want to engage with it. I feel that way--it isn't a matter of value or moral, it's just something that on a personal level I don't like and want nothing to do with.

But the key part of kink positivity is that I need to recognize that I can not be into something without making it a moral judgement on those who are. As you say: If the people involved are all consenting adults, it isn't my place to pass judgement or tell them how to live their lives so long as no one is getting hurt. I need to trust that as adults, they are capable of handling their own sex lives without my intervention. It is not my place to butt in and tell people that because I find their kinks gross that they need to watch out for red flags, any more than it would be anyone else's place to do the same to you.

Anon, you seem to be sort of trapped halfway. You are capable of understanding what kink positivity is supposed to be, but you're not--and forgive me if I'm wrong--really willing to seriously examine what "supposed to be" means when your personal tastes are being challenged. You're saying you're not asking me for validation, but you are asking verbatim "Am I wrong to write off someone for sexual preference as long as it's between two consentint adults?".

I don't really feel like I need to clarify the answer on that, Anon. I'll just point out that you should imagine how you would feel if someone wrote you off morally for one of your sexual preferences when it takes place between yourself and other consenting adults, and whether or not you feel the justifications you'd make against that person could be meaningfully different than the ones someone who participates in age regressions would make to you.

At the end of the day, framing it internally as "It seems like a red flag" is just a way to frame your reaction as morally superior. It is a way of saying "I'm not judging this badly because I don't personally enjoy it, I'm trying to help people. Them doing this is dangerous and I need to be involved and even be against them doing this for their own good". It is the same pearl-clutching Puritan thinking as any fundamentalist Christian would, and it leads to the same thing: Telling full-grown adults that how they have sex between themselves is fundamentally wrong and that your dislike at the very idea of them partaking in it takes priority over their ability to partake in it at all.

I'd suggest asking yourself whether or not you feel as though you'd be respected if someone approached you and told you that, yes, they understand that you're a fully grown adult consenting to sex in this manner, but they don't trust your ability to consent because it seems to them as though there's red flags involved and therefore they DO have a right to get involved in your sex life. For your own good, of course. It isn't your fault that you're into something bad like this. You're traumatized. It's just that people who want to have sex with you are actually taking advantage of you and hurting you, and you just don't know it because you're traumatized, so it's up to other people to tell you how you should and shouldn't have sex and who you shouldn't have sex with.

[danganronpadedication]

DAY 16: DANGANTOBER

Day 16: Favorite Scene

There are so many scenes that I could call my favorite of the series. I like scenes that are silly and lighthearted, and some that are bone-chilling. There were scenes that I was delighted by, and scenes that left me with a sinking pit of dread in my stomach. The scene that I decided to go with is one that caught me off-guard on first viewing. When it played out on my screen late one Wednesday night, it EMBEDDED itself in my memory, and crosses my mind at least once a week. Yep, the GIF is a dead giveaway, it's a scene that I call "Makoto's Despair".

Original Uploader: Nagito Komeada on YouTube (yes, it's spelled that way in their user)

When I say my jaw dropped during this scene, I meant it. I'm someone who really appreciates when things get more disturbing in this way, even if the scene itself involves subject matter that scares me. It shows guts, and its a good way to make me feel the stakes and tension that is needed to become invested. Readers of my posts will know exactly the reason this scene freaks me out, and if you're unfamiliar, I have my makeup post for yesterday coming out very soon and it will talked about on there. Some background information and summary on the scene for those of you who didn't watch the anime, or are too chicken to watch the scene. This scene takes place in Episode 11 'All Good Things' of Future Arc. After Kyoko's death in episode 10 'Death, Destruction, and Despair', Aoi finds a journal underneath her body. Written in the journal is Kyoko's deduction and conclusion on who the traitor in the Future Foundation killing game is. She hypothesized that there was no traitor, and that the monitors placed throughout the hallways of the facility were somehow brainwashing whoever was closest to them between rounds to commit unalive. To test her theory, Makoto decides to use himself as the subject for the experiment. He is tied to a chair in front of a monitor, while everyone else goes into a room without monitors. The round ends, and everyone is put to sleep. Makoto is woken up shortly afterwards by the red glow of the monitor. The monitor begins to play a video of Monokuma, and begins the brainwashing sequence. Makoto finds himself in a strange, void-like place. Kyoko and Sayaka appear, taunting him with reminders of the Hope's Peak killing game. Sayaka reminds him that he was unable to get her out like he promised, and Kyoko blames him for her death. His other deceased classmates also appear, and their bodies start to change to resemble how they looked when they died. Makoto tries to apologize, saying he just wanted everyone to be together and happy.

Outside of this void, which is assumedly his mind, Makoto is screaming and struggling to get off the chair. He gets himself free, and a knife drops from the monitor. He picks it up, and in his mind, Kyoko and Sayaka tell him to join them. Makoto has a strained grin on his face, and opens his eyes, now swirling with red spirals. He says he'll join them, but he's stopped by Juzo Sakakura. Juzo uses some 'not so gentle' means to get Makoto to snap out of it. Makoto then returns to the others with confirmation for Kyoko's theory.

This scene is one that provides good insight into who Makoto is as a person. In my Day 3 post for Dangantober, I briefly talked about Makoto having survivor's guilt, and this scene is my basis for that claim. It's very on the nose about it. Survivor's guilt is a trauma response that can happen when someone feels guilty over surviving an event where others died. It can cause similar symptoms to PTSD and other traumatic disorders. It's the idea of "why was I the one to live, and not these other people?", which is obviously an unhealthy mindset.

Makoto hides it well, but he does display certain symptoms of survivor's guilt. In episode 6, 'No Man Is An Island', Makoto has a vivid nightmare of Kyoko's death, with Munakata blaming Makoto for her death. Specifically, saying that Makoto was at fault for thinking he would be able to go through the entirety of this game without sacrificing someone close to him. Intense and vivid nightmares that harken back to whatever traumatic event happened or is currently happening, is one of the main symptoms of survivor's guilt.

Aside from serving as excellent foreshadowing for episode 10, this nightmare is a sign that the active stress from being in this new killing game is getting to him. His survivor's guilt would worsen as a result of Kyoko's real death, since the circumstances would lead him to believe it was his fault for just surviving.

See, the Future Foundation killing game has a special twist to it. Everyone has a bracelet on their wrist, that has a "Forbidden Action" on it. Doing this action will result in your death via the release of a certain poison. For example, Makoto's forbidden action is running in the halls, so Aoi gives him a piggyback ride. Kyoko's forbidden action is "Passing the 4th time limit with Makoto Naegi alive". If he lives past the fourth round, which he did, she would die. She deliberately hides this from him, not wanting him to worry.

Now that she's dead, he learns about her forbidden action, and he nearly shuts down with grief. Yet another person he cares about, gone instead of him. From this point onwards, he spends a lot of his time doing more reckless actions in order to stop this game, from confronting Munakata (who wants Makoto dead or captured) to this very incident with the video.

The guilt is pushing him to move without regard for himself, which is very close to more self-destructive symptoms of survivor's guilt. That's also why Kyoko plays such a big part in this scene. It's fresh trauma, fresh pain, that only serves to amplify these feelings within him.

Of course, Makoto manages to recover and pick himself back up with help from the people around him, like Aoi, and Munakata after a change of heart. He's a strong person, he's resilient, and he is the Ultimate Hope for a reason. There is no easy wrap-up for dealing with survivor's guilt. He's always going to be dealing with these feelings, but hopefully, as the world heals, so will he.

Besides, it definitely helps that Kyoko actually survives.

-Mod Tsumugi

[rebouks]

Having read/reread Somnium this past week/two-ish... I have some theories about Wyatt.

Every character we create has a bit of us, our experiences, and our biases. On that same note, I think every persona Wyatt has projected contained a bit of truth, but also a fair bit of fabrication. Of all the characters in Somnium, I think he had the worst childhood. It's really a miracle he's alive and not completely batshit crazy. And it's understandable why he learned to shut down emotions from a tiny age.

But Wyatt is AND isn't who we've seen. That nerdy, awkward doofus Courtney got to know, there a bit of truth there. But he exaggerated it for her. The absolute psycho that everyone shied away from... There's a bit of truth there, but I think also a fair amount of embellishment. If you're gonna be surrounded by homicidal thugs, then by all means, be the craziest one in the room. The one person that everyone is wary of. When he had his years alone in Mt. Komo (aka his purgatory), it was the first time his survival didn't depend on acting FOR someone else. He could just BE.

Wyatt says he isn't wired right and that he's emotionally faulty. But is he really as bad off as he thinks or is that what he's always been told? Obviously empathy is not his strong suit, but we've seen him: jealous/envious (others' relationships), selfless (letting Darien & Brynn go), appreciative (Oscar's help), petrified (to the point of throwing up), kind (to Ichiro, Mayo, and Brynn), and managed to (while sweating) mumble an ILY. All of which are normal emotions. He tried to make amends where he could. He adopted a cat ffs. A street cat that now has the poshest looking cat bed I've seen lol And the last time he choked someone was out of passion and (somewhat righteous) anger, not emotionless calculation.

I think who Wyatt was (and thought he was) is fading away, however damaged his past left him. I don't think he'll ever be a soft guy/touch to the world at large. Only a select few will be privy to that side if him. But I think his true nature is finally being revealed. Or am I reading him wrong? Enlighten me, Becca!

Ohhh you've read him remarkably well indeed! I truly love Wyatt's character, he's so complex and he really did have a nasty childhood.. on the surface I'm sure it looked like he had everything he ever wanted, but that's faaar from the truth.

I think he's only just realised that he's not actually a psychopath at all, he just kinda learnt how to be one as a coping mechanism when he was very young, so young that it almost seemed like reality in the end, even to other people! (There's a reason it seemed so genuine ⚆_⚆) I suppose in a way he lied to himself for so long it became reality. Ask Bruno.. he's still convinced he's a psycho! 😅

I rlly think smth shifted the moment he became suspicious of Oscar tho, and whilst at first he was intent on protecting the "family" and doing the "right" thing, the more he thought about it, the more he realised how done he was. No one listened to him, no one respected him, but he knew he was right! It was like he realised he'd never progressed from being a small child, pushed out of the way and ignored, even when they're begging to tell you something important! Arturo wasn't interested, so instead.. he had to pay. Wyatt didn't want to be loyal to him anymore! At the time, he didn't help Oscar n' co. just to do the right thing, he wanted to fuck his father over more than anything, so.. still pretty self-serving in a way but he's had a loooot of time to think since then and it's been so intriguing watching the slow shift in his mindset.

He's everything he's ever been, pretended to be and everything he never was, all bundled up into a ball that he buried deep inside; only when he was free did it all start to unravel.

I adore the examples of humanity you've picked up on tho, all those tiny hints we got that maybe he's not completely devoid of emotion after all... He's still Wyatt, but he's also Kaito too.. he's intelligent, he CAN be kind - to the right people, tho he definitely struggles with empathy - he's jealous, possessive, ambitious, confident, not confident at all 😆 he doesn't know, actually.. maybe we should check back in on him in a little while lmao

Hurray for the truly grey man!

Also.. I kinda started putting together a lil timeline of posts/moments that I thought were pivotal to his slow lil journey but this is long af as is so I'll work on that and post it separately 👀

[stellaluna33]

How about that time when ASP bragged that Rory only had her first time when she was 19/20 or something, wasn’t it weird that she was so proud of that, especially when she “made” her have such a lousy first time, married man and all?

Why was Rory being a virgin until “late” that groundbreaking for ASP, I wonder?

If I’m not mistaken she was shading other teen shows that had their protagonists/leading ladies having their first times earlier, and idk once again it just looks like she digs shaming girls for having sex.

Personally, I used to love that Rory was still a virgin until college bc I could relate to her even more because of that, haha, I just got kinda disappointed that Amy seemed to see it as some sort of quality?

Sorry, English is not my first language so idk if I’m expressing myself very well, but yeah I’m curious to o know more opinions about this.

The way I understand it, Amy was under a lot of pressure from the network to make Rory "sexier." But why should a teenage girl character HAVE TO have sex to be a worthwhile or relatable character? She shouldn't! But that kind of mindset was what ASP was pushing back against, and maybe it's an unpopular opinion, but I actually really appreciated that. What you have to understand is that when I grew up watching teen media from the 80s and 90s (and going into the early 2000s), there was persistent messaging that still being a "virgin" by the time you graduated from highschool was kind of embarrassing. Losing your virginity was widely viewed as some sort of necessary "milestone" instead of a very personal and optional choice. (Especially for boys, but there was a lot of that for girls in TV and movies also) It wasn't until right around the turn of the millennium that I remember starting to see movies/shows that QUESTIONED that idea, that started asking well, WHY, though? When there started occasionally being characters who expressed that they shouldn't HAVE to have sex just to fit in. That it should be a PERSONAL choice. And like, I'm not a historical scholar- I haven't done a STUDY of whether this is accurate or not, but this is what it FELT LIKE to me as a teenager. And it FELT LIKE Rory was a really refreshing character for nerdy girls like me and my friends- that it was OKAY if you hadn't had sex yet. It was OKAY for a teenage girl to be focused more on academic or career aspirations rather than "losing her V-card," or that maybe she just doesn't feel ready yet, and it doesn't make her a "loser" or a "prude!" Like, that felt like SUCH a rare thing! ASP wanted to write a character like that, partly because it hadn't been done much, and she got a lot of pushback from the Network about it (which is kind of gross?). And I just... don't think that necessarily means that she was "slut shaming" anyone else.

I confess to being surprised when I started seeing people on here saying that Gilmore Girls had a "negative" view of sex. (This got long, sorry!)

Like, Lorelai has an active sex life with a variety of different partners over the course of the series, and that seems to be portrayed as normal and morally neutral. Sookie has an active and healthy sex life. When Rory is sleeping with Logan in college, the narrative seems to paint Richard and Emily (and the unfortunate Reverend they brought in) as ridiculous and controlling for objecting. Paris and Doyle have an active and enthusiastic sex life, and the narrative doesn't seem to judge them for it... I do admit that there does seem to be a pattern of unfortunate "first times" for the younger characters, but I wonder if that's more about Amy's addiction to "drama" than her views on sex. About Paris specifically, I always interpreted her paranoia about being "punished" for having sex as being commentary about how SOCIETY judges girls for having sex (because Reality for girls was a lot different from the pop culture fantasy norms). Gilmore Girls just wasn't interested in portraying some kind of "ideal world." They were just "putting these guys in Situations." And I mean... it's a show largely about generational trauma stemming from a teenage pregnancy! The characters are going to have some complicated and probably even unhealthy feelings about sex! And can I be honest for a minute? Much like attitudes towards our bodies, I'm honestly a proponent of what I'm going to call "sex neutrality." Because, yeah, sex is supposed to be fun and feel good and even be beautiful... And ideally it is! But sometimes it's not. Sometimes it's bad or painful or awkward or emotionally messy or damaging or degrading. Are we supposed to pretend that doesn't happen? Because it does. Are TV characters just not supposed to acknowledge that side of it? I don't know. I don't think Gilmore Girls is a perfect show. I don't agree with everything ASP thinks or everything the characters do. But I do think sometimes viewers want to see some kind of "message" where there just isn't one. Anyway, this is just my opinion, and I may be wrong about one or several things! 😆

[adamworu]

hii i just wanted to say thank you for the years uve been posting eva and hyper-analyzing the series and kaworu especially .. i found ur blog after watching the series back when the Kaworu Database consisted mostly of soundboards and shit like that and despite my waning interest in the series ive not had the impulse to unfollow u. which is weird for me, because at the ripe age of 26 there’s a lot about nge that doesnt sit right with me anymore.

i got my boyfriend to watch NGE and the rebuilds with me and found myself genuinely ashamed way more than i’d anticipated. the last movie was the nail in the coffin for me specifically because of, let’s face it, the surplus of self-aware asuka fanservice. i was repulsed and denounced my interest in the series entirely. it was difficult to make such a claim because of how important to me the series was (still is, if im being honest) and how pivotal it was to my growth at the time i first watched it.

saw one of your posts on my dash today and went to take a casual look at your blog cuz i was curious as to how you were faring in the sea of eva content after a solid 10 years. looked at one of your posts explaining what nge is at its core and the messages it means to send and How it sends them and found myself falling back into the mindset of “fuck, i missed this shit.”

i appreciate how many years you’ve spent looking at evangelion as a piece of psychological horror, how many years you’ve spent dissecting it under a microscope with 50000x magnification. you’ve been the Only thing that’s brought eva back to the front of my feeble little brain over the past, idk five years or so, and youve now been the reason why i can still appreciate the series despite its flaws. you don’t focus on those flaws and it reads that you do so not because you don’t care, but because they’re obvious and don’t need to be stated. im starting to ramble and im sorry that this ask was long but dming you felt too.. personal despite this message being exactly that.

TL;DR, thank you for analyzing evangelion and kaworu nagisa for many years and singlehandedly reminding me of all the reasons why i enjoyed the series as much as i did when i first watched it. i know your interest in eva is waning, so thank you for what youve given the world over the last 10 years <3

Thank you ever so much! This blog sort of started as a way for me to navigate Eva myself. It's been 10 years and though my passion has fizzled, I still get those visceral feelings of Eva no matter what. It always pulls me in. I still have some of that juice left in me, but mostly I found other source material at the moment I'm highkey obsessed over (I'll give you a hint: cult classic, starts with V, ends with D). It's not all bad. I hope you have a wonderful day :)

[cozage]

If we're getting another chapter for made for two can we know the real reason why Zoro decided to end the relationship? I feel like there's something more than him getting annoyed at us like cheating or jealousy or whatever

Hello dear reader!

I'm so glad you're enjoying the fic and are super invested in it all! I actually did consider having Zoro do something awful like cheat on you or something, but (even for the sake of moving the story forward) I don't think he'd do that. Let me explain more below the cut (and show you why it's still just as tragic)

TL;DR: Zoro and the reader do love each other, but show it in very different ways, and they were doomed from the start because of it.

I think Zoro does care about and loves the reader in his own way, but Zoro doesn't show it in the same way other people on the crew do, especially you. Just because he cares about you doesn't mean he's going to alter his day to be with you more often, and in his mind, training (so he can protect you and the other people he cares about on the crew) is the most important thing. He's selfish, and he doesn't care about large romantic gestures. He doesn't remember important events like birthdays or anniversaries or even what day it is in general.

He's the kind of person who likes you around when he needs you around - which we see at the beginning of the story when he's playful in bed. But after his morning shower, his mindset shifts to training, and he doesn't need you around anymore because you'll just distract him. He's not the kind to spare feelings or tell you unnecessary words of affirmation. He gets to the point because that's what he understands, especially when he's upset.

And then we have the reader, who is someone that loves quality time, and wants to spend time together with not just Zoro but everyone on the ship. They love loudly and they want to be loved the same, which is something that Zoro has never had the capacity to understand or appreciate. This has resulted in months of arguments; most days looking like the one I had written.

The day written wasn't any different than most island days, expect for the date. The island you all landed on marked 6 months of you all dating, and Zoro never commented on it, he didn't want to be around you, he broke his promise and his compromise made with you, and he purposely avoided the one thing you guys do on a normal day (watching the sunset). He was angry with you and purposely avoided it all out of spite. He was itching for a screaming match because normally those types of fights end with you begging for forgiveness and you tiptoeing around him for the next few days because you don't want to lose him, and thats what he expected. But today was the day you gave up fighting, because of how hurt you were over the 6 months being forgotten by him. It was the straw that broke the camels back.

Sometimes people love each other deeply, but they simply aren't compatible. Such is the case with the reader and Zoro (which we can see from your POV and Zoro's argument with Sanji). That doesn't nullify the love that still remains between you two, in fact it makes it all the more painful. It's the reason I added a very small line into Dance for Two, actually.

"You wanted to run away, restart the day, or just go back to when you and Zoro first broke up and beg for his forgiveness."

It's a line that most people probably miss or doesn't mean anything to them. But the reader is used to this to portray just how messy their relationship is with Zoro. They're used to screaming and fighting, just to make up the next. This is the way their relationship has always been, so it must be normal.

You know how you're in a dimly lit room and you can almost see everything then a bright light blinds you? But when your eyes adjust, you realize you've been missing out on so many details and colors while you were sitting in the dark. It's a whole new world now, something you didn't know was possible.

I imagine Sanji is that light for the reader, and now that you've learned that there are people who will sacrifice for you rather than give you an occasional compromise, it's impossible to go back to the way it was before.

I must admit, I know this is not as enthralling as catching him cheating or having some other big thing happen that is earth-shattering for the reader. I don't think Zoro is a bad person, after all. He's just bad for you.

[beyondthetemples-ooc]

Questions tag!

These got Long, so I'll do the tagging stuff up top!

Tagged by: @orionsdestiny

Tagging, under the express condition that you Want To: @sirenianheart @chasm-connected @blaackbiird @monstrousgourmandizingcats And anyone else who sees it and desires to overshare on the internet!

Are you named after anyone?: I'm not named after anyone, no, but I was named after the concept that I gave my mother "a wealth of faith" when she learned she was pregnant with me. (She was in a very rough situation and though I can't understand the mindset myself, I appreciate the sentiment that knowing she was going to have me gave her faith somehow.)

When was the last time you cried?: Does tearing up at songs count? I think it was at I Have a Right by Sonata Arctica on Friday. That song ALWAYS gets to me... (And I think the same day Spotify had shuffle'd up Worth It by Pop Evil, which ALSO always gets to me.)

But as far as ACTUALLY crying, with tears falling and everything, I think that was... when I cried at the last house meeting because I was talking about things that are kinda inherent to Me (speaking bluntly because speaking aloud doesn't come naturally to me and it's the only way I can get the words out, not knowing how to be Soft and Gentle, being frustrated with my disabilities and how I hurt people by accident because of these things, etc.)

Do you have kids?: No, and I have zero desire for them. (I have already decided that even if I do ever actually WANT kids--and I will never have a kid unless I have an Active Desire to Raise One and dedicate my whole life to this living creature--I will adopt. Between my health issues and emet*phobia, I am simply NOT going to risk pregnancy.)

Do you use sarcasm a lot?: Sarcasm? Why would I use that? It's not like it's my favorite form of humor or anything. /s

Seriously though, I do use it a lot around friends and when I'm feeling snarky. Like Eris said, I'm trying to cut down on it because I've learned that a lot of people are hurt or offended by it, even when I don't mean to be hurtful. (And sometimes I do. But a lot of time I'm being critical in a Playful way.) But it IS my favorite form of humor. And if I'm comfortable and in a witty mood, I will likely be making a sarcastic comment.

What's the first thing you notice about people?: Their emotional state, and whether my empathic senses are telling me they're being Honest about it or Putting Up a Front to Hide Things.

What's your eye color?: "Blue" officially, but mostly gray tbh. They look more blue when I wear black (which is most of the time), a LOT more gray if I'm wearing blue (which is a fair amount), and actually kinda green when I have blue makeup on.

Scary movies or happy endings?: Both, ideally! I like it when people have to WORK for the happy ending. My favorite stories ever are the ones that made me fear for the characters, but then gave them a happy ending. And I do LOVE horror! (Unfortunately the aforementioned emet*phobia means I have to be Very Careful watching scary movies though.)

Any special talents?: I think of myself as a VERY good writer! Especially with characterization and headcanon power, moreso for my OCs than canon characters probably, but I like my word choice and I like the way I adjust my writing style to suit the scene too. My poetry tends to have the same meter and rhyme schemes, and generally I don't capitalize on metaphor the way other poetic masters do, but I like my poetry pretty well too. I can sorta draw, and it's far more Expressive than Realistic, but I like my art.

I'm also rather skilled in pet care! I literally have veterinary training on a formal education level, I just decided not to go $120k into student loan debt to do it forever. :P That's another thing, I'm pretty damn good at budgeting! Let's see, also Asking the Right Questions to figure things out. I'm a practicing witch and I specialize in being eclectic! So there's a WIDE swath of different kinds I know about, even though I have my favorites. Same goes for meditation; I've been practicing that for longer than I've been intentionally practicing magic!

I'm also an empath, which is both a skill (interpreting what my senses are telling me) and an inborn talent (I have no choice in the matter; I did try to cut it off when it grew faster than my skill at shielding myself grew to the point of constantly overwhelming me in high school, but it made me feel suffocated). But contrary to popular stereotypes, that doesn't make me super emotionally intelligent. I know it's ~~cool~~ to bully people for this now (heavy sarcastic emphasis), or write it off as "honey you just have hypervigilance", but I was always an empath even before the trauma. And I actually Can't read body language. So like. Miss me with your skepticism, you don't know my life. What I lack in EQ though, I also have a special talent for facing my flaws and figuring out what work I need to do to work on them.

Where were you born?: Ohio, USA! I don't know why the whole internet hates Ohio, it's actually really nice in my part of it.

What are your hobbies?: Writing, poetry, witchcraft, and meditation all previously mentioned! I also love love LOVE music, I go to live concerts at LEAST once a year, theoretically I draw, I like learning everything I can about my hyperfixations, caring for my pets, kinda-sorta have houseplants (two spider plants by the kitchen window that I hijacked from the office spiderplant at work ;P), I'd garden if I had the time and energy, and of course, reading. I'm very slow unless something has All of my Absolute Attention and there are no other obligations to prioritize, but I adore it and I'll almost ALWAYS choose reading over playing on my phone when I have the free time.

Have you any pets?: Yep! Three diamond doves (wild-type Blue and his two white-rumped blue sons Silver and Ametrine), and two chinchillas (Dusty the mosaic and Sisu the TOV ebony). I'm considering getting a pigeon and getting back into planted fish tanks someday, but I'm holding off on those until I have more free time.

What sports have you played?: I played soccer for the city for two years? No sports other than that. I don't have that "competitive spirit", and I prefer solo exercise like hiking and swimming. (I have done horseriding as a random fun activity now and then, and I've... tried archery, the once. I have so little upper body strength I couldn't draw the bow and even though I was standing halfway up a driveway and the target was at the top, the arrow only went halfway there.)

How tall are you?: 5'4! (I used to think it was 5'3.5, because doctors can't seem to agree if my height is 5'3 or 5'4, but I had someone measure me and we both agreed I'm actually 5'4.)

Favorite subject in school?: Possibly English? Surprisingly I didn't like Creative Writing as much as I thought I would, because I don't like being told WHAT to write or HOW to write it. But I also really loved art, choir, Latin, and science! And in college, I ADORED anthropology and Comparative World Religions. I also really liked my etymology courses!

Dream job?: No job at all!~ If I was able to choose my office hours (i.e., not run myself ragged) and go to school for free, I think I would make a very good exotics veterinarian. Particularly for birds. But the reality is that would put me in debt for LIFE, and the hours are grueling, and though I think I could handle the emotional toll of seeing pets suffering and the occasional euthanasia, my emet*phobia makes v*ing animals a nasty trigger (part of why I'd want to work with birds tbh), and I CAN'T handle the emotional toll of people knowing their animals are suffering and simply not caring. (I loved working at the pet store, but I saw that so often it broke my faith in humanity for a little while.) Or they can't afford the treatment their dearly beloved pets need and the kindest option is to put them down to spare them the suffering of dying a slow death from it.

One of my dreams though is to found a charity to help people pay their vet bills! Other dream jobs include being able to make a living through translation (reality: incredibly unstable pay and having to self-market), or through some sort of neopagan spirituality (reality: there's very little money in that unless you want to publish a book through Llewellyn or something, which has a whole host of issues with misinformation and editing books to suit their perspective rather than yours), or travel (that COSTS money, not MAKING money), or breeding birds or chinchillas (very expensive hobby, and there's a reason most people do it as a HOBBY and not their primary income, because the customer base is unreliable and Taking Good Care of A Whole Lot of Animals is expensive, both monetarily and in time cost).

So ultimately, I do not want a job. Working on it, but that's gonna take a few years before I can ever get to the point of leaving the job world behind forever! My dream job is no job at all, and all the time and money in the world to travel and learn languages and own all the animals I can take care of and practicing my spirituality and being a part of that community to my heart's (and soul's!) content.

[the-tarot-witch22]

Okay so I am back again Hehe! (Evil laugh lmao) I absolutely love your games and the fact idk why I was feeling this eagerness to create a moodboard about your relationship I even don't know why?? At first i thought about sending it but because i ain't a tarot reader i felt like it's not good. But now I got the chance so I'm sending in two moodboards. Keep them as a gift from you, you really appreciate me and supported me with my non tarot exachanges which means so much to me!! Love youuuu 🫶🏻🤍🫂

Okay so note; The post might be long. Sorry for that in advance. 😭

Moodboard of your higher self;

I believe your higher-self is someone who's very feminine, motherly and kind. Like she has this bubbly side to her as well but she's mature and a homemaker too. She knows her worth, is confident within herself, her body and most of the above her soul, she doesn't hold onto the past she, doesn't have unhealthy attachments, heals, spiritually awakened and intune with her spiritual and feminine side. She is a giver but a receiver too, just like sunshine she's hopeful and shines bright, maybe your smile is very Beautiful or when you smile it radiates sunshine, sparkly, and glowing. She knows what she wants, nature is her place. She reminds of the water, river flowing in the garden, in the woods, calm and collected, flowing. Helping others but knows her boundaries too, faithful. Carefree, high spirited, light femine energy tbh, takes care of herself, love love, knows how to stand up for herself and Knows when to walk away. Also something about hait was coming so maybe you have brown and beautiful hair or she does. She also seems domaint and bold, like doesn't let anyone walk over her, is at peace with what happened focuses on her future and know what she wants in relationships, approach things in a more healthy way, takes care of herself, doesn't dwell on past. Healthy mindset and colourful something is colourful about her. I also feel physically too she might be more caring like good clothes, takes cares of herself, and also like maybe you'll physically be more attractive?! Like something about appreance or how you present yourself from bow is different. Positive and pure hearted. Ofcourse you already are sweetheart 🫶🏻🤍

Moodboard of your and your fs;

Okay first of all I do have said this many times I'll say that again, your fs seems very masculine and domaint. Like someone who knows what he's doing, big boy energy, mature, knows how to handle things, uhm uhm, but at the same time i think he's soft and caring, like maybe physical touch is his love language, I do feel you are more clingy one in the relationship and he's not clingy but he has his way to show that you are his, his touches could be very common for you and make you feel things, dresses well, most likely pants and shirts, watches, Acts of service could be his love language too, like helping you with your clothes (yes clothes specially like tying the knot something like that), forehead kisses, physical attraction is there too, manly aura, good hands, you to give off vibes of like a masculine x feminine, you are soft, kind and sweet he seems a bit cold, bold and confident. Your relationship seems very traditional maybe you two are from same culture or religion but at the same time you two are exactly that traditional you two are open minded. Staring at you while you aren't watching, domaint one in the relationship, whole you are the one who surrenders but you no less than him you are also domaint in your own way, talkative (you) while he loves listening to you, your relationship is passionate and loving not too much pda in public bit still shows everyone you two are in love. Perfect for each other, he might find you cute or your mannerism, you both seem jealous type, but different way of jealous. He's like the bread winner and you are the homemaker but in a postive and healthy way. There is a good balance between you two, he might not be too expressive about himself or very private and maybe you'll help him with that. Eldest son energy tbh, grumpy vibes, b/w yes again the colour black popped up again. 😭

Hopefully something resonates also please takes this with grain of salt as i ain't a tarot reader so this is non tarot exachange.

I'm Jasmine, a Capricorn sun, Virgo moon and Taurus rising. Dob; 18th January. Love travelling and exploring things.

Thankyou so much for everything sweetheart, hope you have an amazing day ahead. Lots of love to you 🫶🏻🤍✨🧿

Be more confident my love the reading was so so beautiful and on top of that two moodboard!? and messages??? I am in love!!! the reading resonates, the message from future self? wow, i can see my higher self like that she just sounds so amazing, and someone i can look upto, i am so glad she is a reciever too, i am glad she knows her worth, the fact i am literally trying to be more calm and collected and i got it in this reading makes me happy, and not dwelling on past i am learning right now i am glad my future self is bad ass, she sounds so sweet, thank you so much for this detailed message it just made me emotional in a good way, i love you sm!

the future spouse one- I HAVE ONE WORD WOW! and it resonates so much, girl you are so amazing and talented!!! he is dominant i always got that, plus i am so clingy and you picked up on that!? so fucking amazing i can imagine myself being clung on to him lmao some reader said same religion some said different religion, so many instances haha, i am gonna *cough cough cough* lmao okay you got the idea *wink*

I loved the moodboard , reading, and it resonated thank you so mich for doing this for me!

I will start with your reading!

Okay so the cards I got for you (6 of cups, the star, king of pentacles, the hierophant, the high priestess and the lovers)

The first thing I feel and hear is you are more than happy, content and healed, you are so in love with yourself and person you are with, you will earn so much, you will transform your life completely, i am seeing lots of spiritual and life changing developments, I heard "go for it" for idk what but i think your higher self wants to comfort you and tell you to not doubt your abilities. Your higher self has met lifelong friends, the people she never wants to lose or let go of, I also feel you having the luxuries to yourself, you might also inherited or gotten money from your hard work, you being like fuck it and more into divine era, your spiritual era, not caring what other people think of you and your choices, I also feel you have met your lover, or soulmate, the person you have shared past life connection with, i feel you will feel very nostalgic your higher self is much more sombre like they miss old things too or things they have left behind but not being obsessing over it but with more like they taught you so you are grateful for it type of thing, I also feel pink, green (pastel) or dark shades have importance in your life, your higher self is very much healed and secure in herself, i heard body positivity and felt you standing in front of mirror and admiring it, like you will love what you see, your higherself has forgiven herself and others who did her wrong, you might have already have too, but your higher self is much much more mature, and just herself, you have grown a lot in your life in such a short period of time, you have also become rich or have enough money, or being more successful, luxury i saw lots of that, comfy bed so random, the clouds that are so dark right now will be clear, i heard let go, you are not alone, you are so so strong and brave, your higher self has found herself a good job or business for herself, like she has enough of it i feel you will be in a higher position in your office or work, I also feel your intuition will play a very big role, you trusting it more, your higherself has some mysteries or secrets that i cant know yet, or just something she wants to keep hidden from me, might be something personal to you, but that thing is also have success, i also feel you higher self took a higher education somewhere you love, again "i heard thank you for meeting me baby" it might be your soulmate, you found him.

That's all love, thank you please give feedback <3

[taegularities]

i love love love jk. but i hate that he criticizes his body too much. he's constantly talking about eating 1 meal a day or not eating for a week and just drinking water (which he did during butter mv i think) i mean it's so unhealthy. intermittent fasting is okay! i do it too. im not overweight but i am curvy, built like a door, have a double chin and cheeks. i have cellulite, a little belly fat and stretchmarks. seeing jungkoom constantly touching and poking his cheeks and being like "aah ive gained weight gotta loose it". makes me feel so insecure. i saw myself not eating for 2 days straight when he said he felt like he gained weight, i felt so bad and guilty when i looked in the mirror. it makes me feel like jungkook has major body dysphoria, and it's just not healthy. what's even worse is that he talks about it publicly, knowing very well people out there are dying to have a body like him.

i get it, in south korea it's this whole thing to be very fit and skinny. i mean yes it's a great country for not having too many issues with obesity. but it also makes me so sad thinking that most of the population is so judgy about themselves and other people. correct me if I'm wrong or of im being too emotional or delusional, i feel like he probably doesn't like people who seem overweight? or are chubby? it's been a pattern with jimin as well. it's just so concerning. it's concerning for the members ofc but also the fans :(

sorry for the rant ...

hey love. gosh, i'm so sorry that all that talk from the boys made you feel that way :( and i totally understand. i can't say what jk likes about others or not, but he does seem to think about his own weight a lot. i noticed that much about all members, really, the constant touching their faces and comments such as, "my face looks so swollen today" and it sucks that they perceive themselves in such a way when i'd die to be that pretty lol!! but you know.. knowing jk, i'm sure he doesn't do it to make anyone feel bad – the kpop industry has always been pretty strict with their idols' appearance, so i think the boys have gotten used to not eating too much during promotions or being pushed to look skinny and healthy. maybe it has kind of become their mindset atp?

sometimes i watch their stuff and see them appreciate food so much – as if they didn't get enough of it back then, which is sadly true (and was even mentioned in the book, right?) :( i think it's gotten a lot better tho!! like, i think most of the members, like yoongi or tae don't care much about that anymore and just do whatever they want. i hope jk is able to see his beauty for what it is at some point, too.. because man is truly gorgeous and deserves to feel good in his body, as do we all. you do, too <3

[sodiumlamp]

Picard

I just did the math, and Star Trek: Picard is approximately 22.5 fucking grueling hours, so that made me kind of sad.

This episode tries. It doesn't quite succeed, but I see the effort and I appreciate it. I'd like to believe that this marks a turning of the corner, and the rest of this season will get better, but it's too late to redeem this series, which currently stands as one of the all-time worst shows I've ever seen.

With a lot of bad media, I will often see apologists offering up defenses like "It had some good ideas, but they were poorly executed." And I have watched TV shows where that simply isn't true. The ideas were bad and the execution was bad, so it was bad all around. Picard, on the other hand, actually does have some pretty great ideas. There's a lot of stuff that would totally work if only it were being done anywhere else but here. And that's actually more tragic, because Star Trek Picard is like this graveyard where good ideas go to die. And of course, they're buried alongside a ton of bad ideas, which the show also has.

All right, so in this episode, they're stuck in the gravity well of a nebula that isn't actually a nebula, and they've only got four hours left to live. The gang have hit rock bottom, but they slowly start to dig their way out, which is kind of uplifting to see. Riker admits to Picard that he was right about not wanting to fight the Shrike. Picard spends some QT with his new son Jack Crusher. Seven and Captain Shaw have to work together to flush out the Changeling saboteur. Beverly figures out that the nebula is actually some sort of alien womb, because it's sending out energy pulses at regular intervals, comparable to a human experiencing contractions during childbirth.

I mean, that last part is pretty ridiculous, but I'll allow it, because it's on-brand for Star Trek. Still... I'm beginning to wonder if anyone in Starfleet has ever seen an actual nebula before. It just seems like this thing turned out to be very different from a nebula, which makes me wonder why anyone thought it was a nebula in the first place.

Anyway, they finally come up with a plan to use the energy pulses from the space-womb to carry the ship back out before they all die. It mostly relies on this weird premise that's also on-brand for Star Trek: that all starships can magically be drained of their power, or absorb power like a sponge. In this case, Bev can predict the next wave, so once they're prepared they can just time it right and use the power of the wave to re-energize the ship. When they escape, they're treated to a swarm of alien squid creatures born from the "nebula".

So what's the problem? Well, two main issues here. First, even though there's a happy ending to this crisis, this episode gets really fucking dark. The crew morale is in the toilet. Riker confesses that he's in a profound depression from the death of his son, so he left his family to get back into space just to try and feel something. He tries recording a message for his family when he thinks they're all going to die, and when the others come to him with their escape plan, he's so despondent that he thinks it would be better to wait for a rescue, because at least that way the ship might still be intact and they could leave something behind. I don't know what the hell happened between Season 1 and this, but that's a pretty dark mindset he's in.

We also learn that Jack approached Picard years ago, without telling him who he was, and asked Picard if he ever considered having a family, and Picard replies that Starfleet was the only family he ever needed, which would have been an innocuous comment except he was saying it to his son without even realizing it, so that's really grim. Also, Jack has some spooky hallucinations near the end of the episode. I guess he really is his father's son, since Picard had the prophetic dreams in Season 1 and the Silent Hill jumpscare flashbacks in Season 2.

Oh, and there's a lot of body bags in this thing. It's kind of tough to appreciate the Titan surviving this mess when you see so many crewmen who definitely did not survive it.

Oh, and Captain Shaw is high on painkillers and he finally opens up about why he's such a giant douche: Turns out he was at Wolf 359, and he and 50 of his closest friends had to figure out which ten of them got to use the only functioning escape pod. Did anyone actually die at Wolf 359? The way I remember it, there were a lot of broken hulls and the Enterprise scanned for life signs and found none. But Sikso got out and Shaw got out. Shaw describes himself as a "dipshit from Chicago," and I gotta admit, ripping off Ben Sisko's origin story is a pretty dipshit move. I'm voluntarily subjecting myself to Star Trek: Picard, so I can't judge.

Oh, right, there were two issues with this episode, but there was so much dark stuff in this one that I got sidetracked.

The other issue is that they just sort of blew off the original problem that got them in trouble in the first place: The Shrike. On their way out of the "nebula" they almost run right into it, but Riker uses the tractor beam to snag an asteroid and fling it into the Shrike before it can attack. It's kind of cool that he got his groove back and managed to one-shot this enemy that had seemed unstoppable a few hours earlier, but it also undermines all the buildup we had with the Shrike in the previous two episodes.

The Shrike's captain looks like she's auditioning for the role of Oswald Cobblepot. She acts like a maniac, and her ship is supposed to be loaded with incredibly powerful weapons. When Titan falls into the gravity well of the "nebula" she cuts off her own hand, which then turns into a floating head and it orders her to pursue the Titan and recover Jack Crusher at all costs, and she reluctantly obeys. The Shrike sucks and she sucks as a villain, and Episodes 2 and 3 sucked, but I assumed they were going somewhere with all of this. Instead, Riker throws a rock at them and that seems to solve everything.

I mean, they didn't destroy the Shrike, so maybe it comes back to menace Picard later, but we spent three episodes on it and I'm not impressed at all. I'm certainly not looking forward to a rematch.

Worf isn't in this one, which is pretty disappointing, but it allowed the episode to focus on the A-plot, which was a good thing. Also we get a day off from Raffi's nonsense. Wait, that means we'll probably have to get double the Raffi in the next episode. Where the fuck is Geordi, anyway? They promised us the whole TNG crew would reunite for Season 3, and we can barely get more than three of them in a single place. At least Worf and Troi are in the show, though. Data's not around, but he's dead, so what's Geordi's excuse?