#which is an accurate translation but has a double meaning in French

[icharchivist]

Listen, I just made a big brain joke and I feel like I need to inflict it on you

Spot has a lot of holes

Because you are what you eat

It works on multiple levels because of the bagels but yes. I'm weirdly proud of that. It's dumb and I'm sleep deprived

Wow thanks i hate it! so much!

yeah it's definitely just about bagels. just the bagels. only the bagels. I refuse to think anything else just bagels.

It was really cursed, but thank you for sharing <3333

hope you get to rest up 🥺 take care!

[papillon82fluttersby]

Famous Five Art Nostalgia #15 – Part 1

Introductory post

Masterpost

🏚️🏺💼 Five on a Secret Trail – Le Club des Cinq se distingue / Le Club des Cinq et la maison hantée

Original publication date: 1956 (UK), 1961 (France)

(Cover art by Jeanne Hives, 1968)

After “Five Get into Trouble / Le Club des Cinq en péril”, this is the second book in the series that benefitted from an upgraded edition in a special collection called “Idéal-Bibliothèque”, featuring more numerous illustrations, a larger format and better quality paper than the regular “Bibliothèque Rose” collection. This book was thus first published in 1961 in the “Idéal-Bibliothèque” collection, and then added to the regular series in 1968, both editions being illustrated by Jeanne Hives. You will find herebelow the illustrations from the latter edition, and I will make a separate post for the “Idéal-Bibliothèque” illustrations, to be published later this week.

You may have noticed that I quoted two different French titles above; this is because of a title change that occurred during a major update to the translations of the whole series in the early 2000s. I am not quite sure what motivated this specific title change. Some other titles hadn’t aged well and had taken xenophobic/racist connotations over time, but this one seems perfectly innocuous: “se distinguer” means “to achieve a remarkable feat.” Maybe this title was considered too bland and thus changed to “la maison hantée” (i.e. “the haunted house”), which, if not accurate to the plot, would certainly grab the attention of potential readers!

~~~~~~

Plot summary (adapted from Wikipedia):

George decides to go camping with her dog, Timmy, so he can recover from an ear injury without being mocked for wearing a large cardboard collar that prevents him from scratching his wound. George is pleased to be joined at the campsite by her cousin Anne, but is disappointed upon learning that Anne's brothers, Julian and Dick, are in France [Spain] and thus, would not be able to visit them.

(George’s temper flares high when poor Timmy’s condition is cause for hilarity in the neighbourhood!)

(George finds a camping place near an old cottage, which is soon to become the location of some very eerie events)

George and Anne encounter a boy named Guy [Guy], the son of famous archaeologist Sir John Lawdler [Jean Truchet], and his small, one-eyed mongrel dog called Jet [Radar]. The boy is excavating an old Roman camp to search for artefacts and asks the girls not to disturb him. Later that day, the boy's twin brother named Harry [Hubert] (as it is later revealed) comes to the area, but the girls mistake him for the first boy, unaware they are dealing with twins. This makes the girls very confused, as they would see the first boy at a certain place, and then think he would have inexplicably doubled up and reached another place. The girls think that he is just one crazy, mad boy, who likes to say things and make promises and later to say that he didn't make such promises or so. (It should be noted that the twins are certainly aware that they’re causing confusion for the girls, but due to a personal feud, neither of them feels the need to clear it up.)

(The girls meet the first twin, Guy – who has not endeared himself to George by playing a prank on Timmy – and his dog Jet)

Later that night, Anne gets up for a drink from the nearby stream and while trying to return to the camp, she ends up near a derelict, ruined cottage, where she sees lights and hears whispers and footsteps. She gets scared and then takes George and Timmy to the cottage but there is no indication of any human activity.

The next day, the girls again encounter the twins separately. The girls then go to George's parents' house for more food supplies and are informed that Julian and Dick will be arriving in a day or two.

The following night, a storm prompts the girls to shelter in the old cottage, where they are shocked to see people outside during the heavy storm and rain. The girls get scared, and Anne decides to leave the place the next day as she does not want to stay at the old cottage anymore.

(Scary happenings at the old cottage 😨)

Julian and Dick arrive the next day and notice that Anne and George are about to leave, the girls explaining their reason for departing. With the boys there, they all decide to stay in the ruined cottage and investigate.

(Five reunited at last!)

The Five spend the day visiting Guy at the dig, swimming at a nearby lake, and searching through the cottage. That night, while sleeping in the cottage, they hear weeping and wailing noises and see some kind of light that makes them a bit afraid. The next morning, the four understand that someone was trying to scare them away. They decide to move their camp and pretend to leave while keeping an eye on the activities at the cottage.

Julian and Dick visit the old cottage that night and they find that a gang of people are trying to find a secret tunnel in which a very precious blueprint was kept. The boys then report their findings to the girls.

In the morning, they decide to warn Guy about these suspicious people, only to find a distraught Harry who – finally – reveals that they’re twins, and explains that Guy and Jet have been kidnapped a few hours ago by the same people who searched the cottage and now wanted to search the dig.

(The Five find Harry distraught after Guy has been kidnapped)

Later George finds a clue to the secret tunnel. After a long and tiring walk underground, the children discover a leather bag that was very well hidden and feels very light. To their surprise, they find Harry and Jet waiting alone behind a roof-fall, their kidnappers having left them there while looking for tools to remove the rubble, confident that Harry would stay put as he got his ankle injured.

(Reconciled twins!)

After exiting the tunnel at the Roman dig, Julian makes sure to remove the rope that they used to get out, so that the bad guys remain trapped underground. Then the Five with Guy, Harry and Jet go to Kirrin Cottage. Later, a police officer arrives and opens the bag, which seems empty but they end up finding a blueprint hidden in the lining. Afterwards, Uncle Quentin reveals that it was a secret document which has only two copies in the world, one with himself and the other with Sir James Lawton-Harrison [Prof. Leroy-Larson] (whose copy has been stolen).

Later, the Five and the twins celebrate around a huge spread prepared by Joanna the cook. The story concludes with Timmy scratching his ear wound, making it go bad again and thus necessitating the use of a new cardboard collar, just as the story began with!

~~~~~~

Cover art through the ages:

(Disclaimer: This is not an exhaustive list; sometimes the dates are difficult to pinpoint; and I have purposefully not included editions that re-used similar cover art, with differences only in layout and font style.)

(Original cover art by Jeanne Hives, Idéal-Bibliothèque, Hachette, 1961 – a pretty group shot!)

(Subsequent cover by Jeanne Hives, Hachette, 1968 – the Five are wearing victory laurels as a nod to the title, in which ‘se distinguer’ means ‘to do a remarkable feat’)

(Poor Timmy and his cardboard collar 😔 – Jean Sidobre, Hachette, 1977)

(Once again, J.P. Morvan takes a lot of inspiration from Sidobre above – France Loisirs, 1979)

(Umberto Nonna brings us to the old Roman dig – Edito Service, 1981)

(Yves Beaujard, Hachette, 1989 – Anne is wearing quite a weird headband in this…)

(Julian and Dick’s stake-out at the cottage – Paul Gillon, Hachette, 1997)

(The old cottage – this looks great, I want to explore this place! Munch and Prunier, Hachette, 1999)

(Title change and lighting strike – the poor cottage has totally lost its charm! Frédéric Rébéna, Hachette, 2008)

(Spooky happenings! Auren, Hachette, 2020)

~~~~~~

Thanks for reading, and see you soon for the Idéal-Bibliothèque illustrations, as well as Sidobre's and Nonna's takes on the book!

[bl-sensei]

Hazbin Hotel French dub review

Took me some time but I finally watched Hazbin Hotel, and it was great! I recommend it. And because I love languages, and specifically translation and adaptation, here’s a review of the French dub.

I want to clarify that I’m talking about the French dub from France, not Quebec. The main difference between the two is that Quebec favours verbatim and France favours melody. In a nutshell: France sounds better but Quebec is more accurate. 

Songs

The songs are smoother in English and the lyrics and singers sound better. Gotta say that it’s really complicated to translate songs; and sadly, sometimes some interesting lyrics didn’t get through (for example: we don’t have the two references of Charlie being like a daughter to Alastor in Hell's Greatest Dad, but we do get the “dad” after). But otherwise, I love the French dub and I enjoy listening to it. I even prefer listening to the songs in French because I remember the lyrics more easily.

My favourite song in French is Hell is Forever; Poison could be but it’s very jerky compared to English (it has to do with French having more occlusives consonants [b, p, t, v, k...]. All the songs are impacted but especially this one).

The song Hell's Greatest Dad has better lyrics in French and that's awesome, but More Than Anything has the worst lyrics.

2. Characters voice

I prefer Husk in French, he has more energy. Vaggie too, also I prefer her French voice.

Angie's va has more guts in French and he genuinely made me tear up in that scene with Val, he was just so heartbreaking. Plus, I find Val scarier in French and I think his voice suits him better; he’s more guttural, and compared to Angie's high voice, it’s truly oppressive.

Adam is dubbed by a French dubbing legend (Emmanuel Curtil) so I prefer him SO MUCH MORE in French (this guy is just the best).

Sadly I think Alastor sounded less threatening in French, Sir Penty lost his lisp and accent, and Lucifer is less funny.

Emmy’s voice is sweeter in French and I think it suits her better, but her singing isn’t the best.

Apart from that, everybody's pretty much the same, and it's awesome.

3. Casual Talking

I love the diversity of the insults, they did an amazing job and I look out to be as good as them.

4. Subtitles

I didn’t think I’d do this but I did because It was quite bothersome that the subtitles were nothing like what I’d heard. I know it’s because they’re made by different people with different constraints, and usually I still understand because it’s not far from what I hear. But this time I had to turn them off because I couldn’t focus on the show because my mind had trouble linking what it’d hear and read (and I can watch a show in English with French subtitles with no problem).

It is not really a problem, but because I like to have the subtitles on, it is for me.

5. Angel Dust & Husk

I must make another point about them because their French adaptation was incredible!

I wasn’t much of a fan back at the pilot when people said there was something between them, because I didn’t see it, but after watching s1, damn! Those guys were so deeply in love with each other that was amazing! And when I watched it again in English I realised it was from the French dub! 

To be honest, I find Husk somehow flat in English — I think it’s because I first heard him in French, so it was odd — and I have trouble knowing what he’s thinking, but in French, he has so much passion that I couldn’t but fall in love with him too. 

Among the things I love the most is, after Loser, Baby, when they’re about to go home, Husk says to Angie “This guy isn’t half bad” but in French, he says “I’m interested in this guy”, which I’m sure refers to him being interested in the “real” Angie more than he “fake” one, but I’m also sure that the double meaning of him fancying Angie was intentional, and damn that’s so cute.

Also : He said “sing for me” instead of “sing that song” + At the end of ep6 instead of calling him “kiddo” (which is a word we use for kids or to insult someone) he calls him “handsome”.

I think they shipped them lmao

As a whole, I honestly wouldn’t say English is better, more that it’s different, though I gotta be honest that the songs sound better. I recommend watching it in French because the voices are sometimes better and the people who worked on it did an amazing job and I have no words to say how thankful I am to them. And it’s coming from someone who prefers the original versions (except for animation, French people are amazingly good at that usually).

[zbeez-outlet]

Part One || Welcome to the Umbrella Academy

Five Hargreeves x OC | TUA Canon Universe | Slow Burn Relationship

Description || It's the first day of October 1995. The gate is iron and the sky is sad and Noa waits to be let into the Umbrella Academy.

Content Warnings || some angst, Reginald Hargreeves' attitude, broken English (if I missed anything, please let me know!)

Note || French is a pretty big part of this character, but I don't fluently speak the language so everything is google-translated. If you know French and can offer more accurate translations, I'd love to work with you!

IMPORTANT EDIT || As an afterthought, I decided to make an important plotline regarding their names, which means at this point in the story they are all referred to by their numbers. It will be important in the next few chapters, so I just wanted to let everyone know I made this change and to reread this chapter if they are confused.

Part Two >>>

Book Masterlist

With untied boot laces and a bouncy rhythm to her step, little miss Noa Lavigne takes special care to splash in every puddle as she intently scans the crisply painted numbers on the curb. Her goal is to match them with the address on her mother's letter, crinkled and splotched as it's become in her pocket safe from the rain.

When the friendly driver — an older gentleman with dark wrinkled skin and white speckling his fluffy beard, only the shine of his teeth hinting at a smile — had picked her up from the airport, he'd laughed and laughed and laughed when she'd asked him to take her to the academy. She had trilled with a flutter of frustrated French and insisted in her too small voice and scattered jigsaw pieces of English that her mother was sending her to the academy to learn.

Part of her had been tempted to run there herself, if only she knew where to go.

The man had laughed again, rolled his eyes in a way that left Noa simpering, and promised to get her where she was going — he had even offered her a lollipop from the collection in his glove compartment that she carefully tucked into the front pocket of her backpack. He'd chattered on throughout the drive in a combination of words she hadn't quite understood, so she'd distracted herself with the slowly passing world framed by her window, counting the birds and doors along the way.

It had taken exactly 43 minutes and 27 seconds for the car to pull to a stop on the corner of a street with no name, during which Noa had counted 59 pigeons and more than double that in doors. With a hearty goodbye and a finger pointing her down the pathway, the man had left Noa to her quest on that very corner street with no title and no signs.

She expects to never see him again.

Now wading through the light rain as she searches, heels rocking every so often when she pauses at the pretty swaying of a tree or the satisfying crunch of leaves under her boots, Noa wonders about this so-called academy.

What will she learn there?

How long until she can see her parents again?

Will she make friends there?

All good questions, all important in their own way, and all with answers that will leave her just enough more cynical than when the day started.

When she eventually finds the matching numbers, a whopping 281 seconds later, her shins are spattered in gravelly rainwater and her fingers have gone a bit numb. These numbers are crispier than all the others, as if freshly painted every day, and lead to an imposing gate just in front of a series of steps that march up and up and up. At the top is a set of similarly iron-molded doors with a pair of shapely umbrellas staring down at her like eyes. She blinks, wondering if they'll blink back at her. They don't, unless they did while she was blinking, but mostly they just intimidate her in their frigid metalness.

Something in the height of the mansion, in the way it looms above her like her scolding mother has hesitation bubbling just beneath the anticipation in her heels, but she reaches forward anyway. The iron is colder than the air around her, and when she shakes the gate, it doesn't budge.

Locked, of course.

Usually, that kind of thing wouldn't matter much to Noa, but she doubts trespassing would make the best first impression, so instead she chooses to hunker down right at the base of the stone wall. She squats with all the tepid balance of an untrained ballerina, careful not to soil her new blue leggings in the pooling rainwater, and hugs her backpack to her chest so she can lean back against the stone. And she waits.

Surely someone must exit the intricately carven home, if only to retrieve the mail or to repaint the number on the curb so they retain their slick print-quality shapes.

53 minutes pass in raining quiet when the chill has set in just enough that her fingers shake, so Noa tucks them into the warmth of her armpits and buries her face in the damp canvas of her backpack. The last sprinklings of the near constant drizzle stick to the frizzy curls of her strawberry blonde hair, dotting the pale redness in a similar fashion to the freckles scattered across her light cheeks, only they shine and shimmer like stars instead of blotching quite so haphazardly. Her new knit sweater — far too large for her slight body, but reliable enough to keep her warm for years despite the way it soaks up the air like a sponge — is similarly dusted with dew, the woven dark brown fabric not so much repelling the rain as absorbing it into its already far too weighted threads. The boots are new too, a size or two too big and unscuffed in a way that makes her feel fancy unlike the tatters of the few shoes she's owned before.

There's a leaf on the pavement just in front of her, far too damp and wilted from the rain to crunch, but it's whole and lonely and staring at her as she stares back. Noa reaches for the brittle stem at the base of the leaf, pinching it as delicately as sugar string, and twirls it to watch the burnt oranges and dusty reds of fall dance between her fingers. The sky hiccups a final sob as the leaf dances, slowly ebbing away its sorrow and warming to the touch of the late afternoon sun — not quite setting, and only just peaking through the now hollow puffiness of the clouds.

"What do you think you're doing?" A stern throttle of words interrupts the leaf's dance, and Noa looks up into the blinding menace of a monocle and two furrowed brows. "Get off my property, you little miscreant."

Noa hardly knows a third of his words, though she can fill the spaces with the derision in his eyes and the obtrusive scolding of his fancily bearded chin. Without the words to understand, let alone explain, Noa goes digging in her pocket with one hand while the other still protects the leaf. The letter is enveloped in simple cream parchment, and when she presents it to the severe older man, she holds her tongue and waits as he scans the gentle slope of her mother's handwriting.

He looks between her and the letter marked with his name and address, a question now bouncing between his teeth, but he is Sir Reginald Hargreeves. He does not bend to the wayward musings of a perfect stranger.

"Wait here," he orders like she understands the sounds and not just the message hidden in the sharp spin of his heel or the slam of the gate.

The puddles glimmer with the winking sun as she counts the seconds — un, deux, trois, quatre, cinq, six, sept, and on she went. Little puffy shaped numbers whisper between her lips.

And then there are bare feet splashing into the puddle she'd been staring at, all pale and knobby around the ankles. She squeezes her eyes shut to protect them from a fresh spattering of dirty water.

"Wha's tha' you're sayin'? Sounds pretty." The boy crouches, rocking back and forth like he's not in danger of crashing into wet gravel stains. His eyes are somehow sharp and cloudy in their crystal blue sparkle, seeing her and seeing more at the same time.

Noa sniffs, head tilting in confusion, and she continues her counting. "Trente-quatre, trente-cinq, trent-six, trente-sept, trente-huit..."

"Number 4, Dad said not to go outside!" Another boy, taller by a handful of measly centimeters that mean everything in the eyes of authority at the prime age of six. Blonde like her, only without the red undertones or extra curl that the first one — Number 4? — seems to share with her. "C'mon, before you get us in trouble!"

He's loud. Noa scrunches her nose, eyes flicking between the two boys as she loses her place in her counting. Maybe if she listens real hard, she'll understand what they're saying.

"But Number Oooone, she's all alone out here! Has been for hoooours!"

"Dad said – "

"Hi, I'm Number 3." Noa jumps at the new voice, wide eyes flitting to her right where a little girl holds out her hand and grins with a mouth full of straight white teeth. She's dark like the man who drove her here, but softer and golden in the light of the sun with a cloud of bushy brown hair. Noa stares at her hand.

There's a strange collage of other kids just behind her, peaking around the protection of the stone wall, all mismatched and daring each other to take a step forward.

"Salut, je m'appelle Noa. My English is...small. Little English. Vous allez aussie à l'académie?" Noa stumbles over the few words of English she's picked up, cringing at the way they come out choppy and unsure.

They all seem similarly confused at the fluid bend of words they've never heard before, though admittedly less frightened than her stuttering tongue.

A flash a blue to her left startles her all over again, and Noa can't help but wonder how strange can strange get? Though, perhaps, that's why she's here. "Comment as-tu...?"

Green eyes like grass clash with her far lighter greenish gray — or grayish green? — gaze, his head tilted like a questioning cat. His jaw drops as if to ask her something, only he never quite gets the chance.

"Children! I thought I instructed you to stay inside." Sir Reginald may have huffed if he were one to do so, though Noa is rather sure he'd never be so undignified. The way each of the children stiffly line up at his approach has her swallowing nervously.

"Dad! Uh, sir, we – "

"Enough of that, Number 1. Take this." A tennis ball is tossed to the tallest, by only the slightest centimeter, boy. Golden blonde and loud and Number 1 if she caught on correctly. "When I tell you, throw that ball as hard as you can down the street." Punctuated with a firm finger pointing further down the way Noa would have gone had she skipped over the right numbers.

"Yes sir."

"Et toi, viens ici," Sir Reginald orders, all bark and bite and authority in his tone, so much so that Noa's not sure she could have refuted even if she'd wanted to. "Ce ballon? Ramenez-moi aussi vite que vous le pouvez."

Noa nods, setting her backpack down on the pavement away from the lingering puddles and delicately tucking the leaf she'd found in the front pocket next to the lollipop. She steps away from the bag and looks to Sir Reginald for his next instructions, and it seems once he has his pocket watch ready in his grasp, he decides it's time.

"Throw it, Number 1."

Noa follows the arch of the ball with flickering eyes and in less than a blink, she's gone in a blur of color and with nothing but a gust of wind and her lingering backpack to prove she was there at all.

She's back and holding the ball out to Sir Reginald before the large hand on his pocket watch reaches the third second. Her boots no longer look new, the soles blunted and smelling of burnt rubber, the leather marked with ash. Clothing similarly disheveled, Noa tries to straighten out as much as possible, though there's not much to do for her hair, wild and curling in large nests of strawberry blonde at the top of her head.

"We'll have to fix that," he sneers at her appearance, not that she's much aware of why he's so dismissive. She nods anyway.

"Bienvenue à l'Umbrella Academy, Numéro 8."

She tries not to be upset that her new boots are ruined.

[scuttling]

Interview

Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairing: Aaron Hotchner/Latina OFC Sophie Cortes Word Count: 1,729 Tags: SFW, Pre-relationship, First meetings Summary: Aaron finally gets the greenlight to hire a new agent. Collection: Sophie Cortes timeline, 0-6 Months at the BAU (See Masterlist for reading order) A/N: Sophie and Reid are partners, because I love them! Link to AO3 or read below!

It takes two months for Hotch to convince Section Chief Strauss to open a requisition for a new member in the BAU. There was a lot of paperwork to be filled out, including detailed explanations as to why he felt the team needed another profiler. He thought it was obvious: for all they do work together as a cohesive unit, Morgan and Elle were technically partners, and when she left, Prentiss took her place. Reid doesn’t have a partner, which makes him feel like a third wheel, sometimes.

(He won’t admit to it, but Hotch notices things. It’s kind of his job.)

Needless to say, the position becomes available, but it takes another couple of months—and several interviews—for Hotch to find the right person to fill it.

Agent Cortes comes highly recommended by the Intelligence Section’s unit chief, someone he worked on a case with in his early days at the BAU; she is young, just 29, but she is more than qualified, and the referring agent is someone whose opinion he respects, so he’s hopeful.

Gideon sits in on the interview because he respects his opinion, too, although Hotch will make the final decision.

Cortes is Latina, petite and polite, with a firm handshake, a warm smile, and dark, striking eyes. Gideon looks at her with somewhat passive interest (something only Gideon can pull off) as they go over the highlights of her resume.

“You have bachelor's degrees in Psychology and Sociology, and master’s degrees in Behavioral Science and Criminology, all from the University of Chicago. How did you manage all of that, at your age?” Hotch asks, wondering if maybe she is gifted like Reid.

“A lot of hard work,” she replies, and it’s an answer he likes. “I graduated high school, enrolled in a dual major program and completed the bachelors’ at 22. Then I was hired onto the Chicago Police Department, and I worked there and got my Criminology degree at the same time. The Behavioral Science degree came after; I began it in person, and they let me finish online when I moved here to join the FBI.”

“What interested you about behavioral science?”

“I grew up in a city that was rich with diversity, but I still noticed that certain people were susceptible to falling into certain patterns, and became curious about why we as people do the things we do. I was already interested in criminal justice, so it seemed a natural path to take.” He nods, jots down a couple of notes before looking back up.

“Tell us about your time with the Chicago Police Department.”

“I went through training while finishing my Criminology degree, worked a beat for about six months before being assigned to the Intelligence Unit; my sergeant found value in the way I was able to get people talking, and a large part of my work was with criminal informants. I worked in Intelligence for three and a half years, and for the last two I was on the Tactical Response Team as well.”

“Tactical Response—that’s SWAT?”

“Yes, sir.”

“How did you end up in SWAT?” Gideon asks, speaking up for the first time; she looks over at him for the first time, as well. “I mean no offense, you’re clearly more than capable, you’re just… small.” She gives him a brief smile.

“Well, there was a hostage situation, the team leader determined that we could get a vantage point from an air duct... and I was the only one who fit.”

“You don’t seem resentful of that,” Hotch notices, a bit surprised. It’s not an origin sorry everyone would be proud of. Her eyes turn back to him.

“I find it’s more important what you do with your time somewhere than how you got there. I contributed to many successful responses over the course of two years that had nothing to do with my size.” It is a great answer, and he holds back a smile of his own, simply nods.

“So you left Chicago to join the bureau; did you have your sights set on any department in particular?”

“I was torn between Language Analysis and Intelligence and ended up somewhere in the middle.”

“Intelligence because of your background, why Language Analysis?” Gideon asks.

“I speak 6: English, Spanish, and Italian as my native languages, plus Russian, French, and German. I have an ear for them.”

“Impressive,” Gideon says, nodding, lips pressed together. Cortes smiles, modest.

“It’s helpful; more than 30% of the population of Chicago speaks a language other than English at home.” Hotch does crack a smile at that, because the statistic reminds him of Reid.

“How would you describe your current role with Intelligence?”

“The official title is Intelligence Liaison. I’m part of a team that travels domestically and internationally, to law enforcement or government agencies, to debrief them on threats we’ve identified, or potential threat activity, and to help them formulate offensive countermeasures.” There is a lot of experience there that would translate well to the BAU, that much is clear. If anything, she may be overqualified, but they would never turn down the help.

“What’s the most frustrating part of your job?” It’s a question he always throws in, because true frustrations—and how one handles them—can say a lot about a person.

“When they don’t listen and people die. I do my best to make sure it doesn’t happen often.” He looks up from the form to the woman, who, in that moment, shows the things she’s seen all over her face. They’re gone from one blink to the next, and he breaks eye contact to choose his next question. No follow up needed there.

“It sounds like you have experience interacting with law enforcement, which is important here at the BAU. We can’t work on a case unless we are invited by the agency with jurisdiction, so maintaining healthy relationships is vital. We have a communications liaison who deals directly with police departments, sheriff’s stations, FBI field offices, and the media, but knowing how to handle them is a big part of the job.” It’s not a question as much as a confirmation, and she nods.

“I’m confident in my ability to interact with other law enforcement in a direct but respectful way. It’s something I’ve done a lot of as Intelligence Liaison.” He has one final question, and though he’s already more than pleased with the interview, the answer will make or break his decision.

“Why the BAU?”

“Curiosity is what got me interested in behavioral science, but it’s empathy that makes me interested in the BAU. My current work helps to save lives, but it’s all very large scale, and it can be detached, cold. I can be detached and impartial when I need to be, but I can’t deny it would feel like a better use of my skill set to make a more tangible difference.” He agrees, can already tell that she would thrive in the environment of their unit, and it’s just the kind of answer he’s looking for; he takes a few more notes, glances over at Gideon for input.

“Anything else you’d like to ask?”

“I think we’ve covered it,” he says, and he stands abruptly, which makes Agent Cortes stand as well. Hotch follows suit. “Nice to meet you. He’ll be in touch,” Gideon adds, shaking her hand briefly and leaving the room. She is left looking a little lost, and Hotch steps around the desk.

“I apologize for him, he’s a little…”

“Capricious?” she offers with a smile, and he laughs lightly.

“That’s accurate, actually. Please don’t take it personally.”

“I won’t. I’ve heard a lot about him, so he kind of lives up to my expectations.” She tilts her head, looking curious. “You don’t, though. Unit Chief Roberts told me you would be stoic; I expected someone much more aloof, but you’re actually rather warm.” He is a bit surprised by her directness, even more so that she would find him... warm.

“I doubt that my colleagues would agree with your assessment,” he says, thinking of the number of less than kind words used to describe him in the past. She just smiles again.

“I guess you really do need me on your team, then.”

He finds it hard not to agree.

“There are a few more things we’ll need from you, such as a psychological evaluation, recent performance reviews, a physical. I’ll be in touch with Agent Roberts, and then you, if we determine you are the right fit. I’ll see you out,” he adds, gesturing to the door, and she follows. The team, who was not yet in the bullpen when she arrived, looks on, curious, as they head to the glass double doors.

“Thank you for the opportunity to interview. I hope to hear from you soon,” she says with another firm handshake, and he nods.

“We’ll be in touch. It’s a pleasure to have made your acquaintance.”

“Likewise, Agent Hotchner.” She gets onto the elevator, and he heads back to the bullpen, stops specifically at Reid’s desk, though everyone is nearby.

“Congratulations, Reid: you’ve officially got a partner.” Reid smiles, looking pleased.

“Who is she?”

“Special Agent Sophia Cortes. She currently works for Intelligence. Bachelors’ in Psychology and Sociology, Masters’ in Criminology and Behavioral Sciences. Fluent in six languages. Got her start at Chicago PD like you, Morgan—Intelligence there too. And SWAT.”

“SWAT?” Morgan echoes, impressed. “She’s gotta be 5’2” out of those heels.”

“She’s got glowing reviews from her superiors there, and from her unit chief: he called her resilient, determined, empathetic, a team player. She’s good at communicating with law enforcement, victims, even unsubs. The BAU is the right place for her. We’ll just be waiting on paperwork to make it official.” He crosses his arms, leans back against the filing cabinet. “I’d have introduced you, but she doesn’t know she’s being offered the job just yet.”

“She must have made quite an impression on you for you to decide on the spot,” Prentiss says, and he nods his head in agreement.

“I think she’ll fit in well. I saw a little bit of each of you in her, and she’s very…” He tries to think of one word to sum up the woman he just interviewed, and decides with a half-smile: “warm.”

[jangmi-latte]

❞ 𝐓𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐥𝐞, 𝐓𝐰𝐢𝐧𝐤𝐥𝐞! ❝

➻ content: sweet apples and...saliva?

➻ warnings: extra diabetes!

➻ comments: goodness, seems like hunt and felmier are exhausted...

— to my french customers, please do alert me if i used your language wrong. i’m double checking the translations in google translate for it to be accurate but i prefer it coming from you.

— big thanks to @yourlittlerunt (aka rook's twin brother) for correcting me!

"Roi des Poison?"

Rook looked around the room in worry. Vil was nowhere to be found. It is very unusual for the said dorm leader to not be up around this time of the day. It was nearing classes and Pomefiore hasn’t seen him around. Of course, Rook took it upon himself to go to Vil’s room. Nothing.  He texted Epel, the first year being the first contact

    He’s not in his room.

The blond male sighed and closed the door once he had left. 15 minutes left before classes would start. Vil could be anywhere, he could be in classes right now as he searched. That’s when Rook’s phone dinged.

    I haven't seen him either.

Have you tried his lab?

Again, Vil would be anywhere. With a hand through his hair, Rook walked over to the room Epel had mentioned and entered, "Vil? Are you in here?" he called.

Silence. He walked inside, surely he must be crouching somewhere. Still, nothing. Just as Rook was about to leave, glass breaking was heard in a distance and a small giggle. "Qu’est ce que c’était? [What was that?]" he mumbled and began his search once more. Another vile broke and Rook quickly went to the slightly open cabinet.

“These rats.” He was about to close the door before a small cry was heard inside the cabinet. The male quickly opened the door once more and to his surprise, there was a baby–no, a toddler, inside the cabinet.

"Ookie!"

"Eh?"

A boy that looked too much like Vil crawled out of the cabinet and into his arms. "Oh, what in blazes is a baby like you doing here?" Rook grumbled and held the baby at arm’s length. The toddler babbled and clapped his small hands. "Ookie! Ookie!" He made grabby hands to Rook. Another thing, he’s naked.

"I came here for Vil, not you. Though if I do get my suspicions correct, you may be Vil." Rook carried the baby on his hip. "Oh well. I’m sure he would appear somewhere else if it's not you. I have to get you to the professor," he announced and the kid simply sneezed.

"How adorable!"

Before heading out, Rook went to his room and searched for any alternative clothes he could give the child. He doesn’t have baby-sized clothes that for sure. Neither does Vil nor Epel. He scratched his cheek, deep in thought, then snapped his fingers.

"I can only think of one solution, for now." Rook grabbed a cloth from his drawers and laid it across the bed. The little boy, who obediently sat on the bed with his big eyes staring at Rook, babbled before being carried by the huntsman, "Shush."

"Shoosh!" he repeated with a giggle.

Rook placed the boy on the cloth. "Now stay still." He began to wrap the cloth, as secure as he can, around the little fellow’s hips. At least he has something to catch his pee and poo. Cleaning is going to be a problem. Rook did not sign up for a babysitting job nor does he know how. He needs a little help from a certain first year. He carried the boy and proceeded to head to class.

As expected, the moment he walked through the halls of the school building, all the students that were running to their classes had halted on their steps and stared at the vice prefect dumbfounded. The unfazed man walked inside his first class, Magical Alchemy. “Professor Crewel, do excuse me for being late.”

"Why do you have a baby in your arms, Hunt?"

"You see, I was looking for Vil, but I saw this child in the cabinet."

"Hunt."

“Oui?”

"That’s Schoenheit."

"Figured. I guess my suspicions were correct, indeed."

Rook looked at the kid in his arms. Little Vil was holding onto his magic pen, too concentrated on trying to remove the gem as he has his lips in a pout. Professor Crewel was correct indeed. Beautiful blond hair with purple highlights and purple eyes. The cutest and most beautiful baby he has ever seen.

"Oh dear, Roi des Poison what ever did you do in that lab?" Rook mumbled.

Divus cleared his throat. "Hunt. We will look at this matter later. Schoenheit is under your responsibility for now. Meet me after classes are over. Now be a good boy and go to your seat." He continued on with classes after Rook had agreed.

He walked over to his sit and placed Vil on his desk. He was receiving looks and whispers, mostly about how cute Vil is or what mishap has caused the prefect to turn into a sapling. Either way, he’s getting more attention now. Rook sighed and leaned on his arm, "You’re adorable." He poked Vil’s chubby cheeks and received a smile in return. Only four pieces of teeth are shown and it sent the blond squealing and bouncing on his seat.

“Hunt!”

“Apologies, professor!”

Ah, small babbles and giggles had made the class chuckle in delight.

"Vil is already stunning, it’s no surprise–" Cater snapped another picture. "—that him being so small would make him so cute!" he cooed and squished Vil’s cheeks. Rook snatched the little boy from the third-year. "Of course! He is the Vil Schoenheit after all," he proclaimed whilst Cater just shrugged and continued to admire the shrunken dorm leader.

Vil was placed on the table once lunchtime came, some have approached and played with him for his cuteness. He loved the attention but getting too much cheeks squishes and hearing loud noises had made him cry. Which resulted in Rook getting protective and shooing the students away. All except Cater who’s very much gentle with the kid.

Now, little Vil is sucking on sliced apples while Rook looked around for a certain first-year. He texted him once more.

    What’s taking you so long?

Epel responded.

    I'm sorry! Professor Trein held me back.

Placing his phone back on the table and adjusting his hat, Rook looked at Vil who stared at him while sucking on the fruit. "Is there anything you want?" he asked.

"Appie..." Vil babbled and released the apple from his mouth. Rook pouted and took the slobbery fruit from him and cut it into smaller bits.

"Don’t you have any clothes for him?" Cater had asked.

"Non. As if I would have any clothes for an infant."

"Senior!" someone called out along with fast footsteps, "Ah, Epel. Finally," breathed Rook.

Epel slowed down into a walk once he has gotten closer to the third-years, "What’s the problem– oh.." he began to ask, yet the moment his eyes settled on the little Vil happily eating the small apple slices, he has gotten his answer.

"How?"

"I have no clue."

Sighing, the first-year scratched his head. "At least he isn’t going to nag again," he mumbled.

"Did you say something?"

"N-Nothing! Have you asked Professor Crewel?" Epel took a seat beside his senior.

"Professor Crewel said to meet him after classes. You and I have taken full responsabilité over small Roi des Poison."

"W-Why am I involved?"

In the midst of the conversation, Vil’s eyes have caught sight of the feather that adorned Rook’s hat. His stubby legs trembled as he pushed himself up from where he sat. He reached his small hands out then plucked the feather from Rook’s hat. Cater looked up from his phone and quickly grabbed the baby before he could topple over the table.

Rook and Epel snapped their heads over to see Cater holding the laughing baby before he placed him back on the table. "Vil–" Rook furrowed his eyebrows at the sight of the feather in Vil’s hand. His own gloved fingers touched his hat before pouting, “Ah. I suppose you could have that for now,” he sighed. Vil giggled loudly whist waving the feather. “Ookie!” he cheered.

“Yes, I’m Ookie.”

“He’s cute.” Epel commented and gently pulled the baby to where he sat. Vil innocently tilted his head to the first year, he thrust the feather to Epel and waved it. The purple-haired student blinked and gave a small smile, “He can stay like this. I’m fine with it.”

“Then you take care of him.”

"I don't know how—"

A sudden stench was smelt by the third-years. Even Cater had scrunched his face, "Did he..." he began. Rook slowly looked at the quiet toddler on the table, Epel stared at him with wide eyes. Vil was just blinking and the feather he had fun playing was now being held gently on his lap. All three students stared at each other before Epel raised his hands, "Not it!" "Cater, you do it."  "Ah well, you see Riddle needs me! I need to go now! See ya, little Vil!’

Cater quickly stood up and ran out of the cafeteria. Rook groaned and looked back at the baby. Vil's big purple eyes innocently looked at the vice dorm leader and sent his little smile. Poking his tongue on the inside of his cheeks, the hunter picked up toddler, and stood up. "Monsieur Apple Princess, come and assist me to Mr. Sam's shop!"

"B-But—!"

Rook rubbed his face in distress. Little Vil has scattered the powder everywhere, he doesn't want to sit still, and he tried to touch the makeup pallettes that Rook accidentally left on the bed. Epel was trying to distract the little boy with the plushies they have purchased, however it seems like Vil was more interested on trying to eat makeup bruhes.

"I thought he was a good baby..."

Epel deadpanned and shook his head. "Babies are too curious with stuff. Vil— I-I mean senior Vil wasn't an exception, I guess," he stated and gave the bee stuff toy to Vil. The feather that was plucked from Rook's hat is now forgotten as it stayed on the bed.

The vice dorm leader sighed and grabbed Vil once more. "Roi des Poison, do stay still," he practically begged. A hunter does get tired too, you know. Little Vil giggled loudly before biting on the bee. Quickly, Rook laid the baby's lower half on the diaper and swiftly attached it around his hips. Just in time as Vil started to wiggle and babbled before crawling away.

"Fini! [Finished!]"

Vil crawled towards Epel and sat in between his legs. He started to babble incoherent words that made both males confused. "Huh?" they said.

A knock came on Rook's door. "Vice dorm leader?"

"Come in!"

A Pomefiore student peeked his head in, his eyes going to Vil, who's eyes are starting to water as he continued to nibble on the bee, for a brief moment before looking at Rook. "Professor Crewel is calling for you in the lab," he said.

With a nod, Epel carried the sniffling baby as both males headed over to Pomefiore's laboratory. There, Divus was crouched right beside the cauldron, inspecting what seems to be a broken vile. "Professor," Epel called out as he bounced Vil in his arms.

The older male hummed and held up the broken vile. "Hunt, do you have any idea what happened before Schoenheit turned into a child?"

Rook shook his head before walking towards the cauldron. He looked inside then glanced over at the spilt potion on the ground. "Is this nectar from a Hibiscus flower?" he asked. Just as those words slipped from his lips, Vil started to wail.

Epel reflexively started to bounce the child in his arms more. "Shhhh.." he shushed and poked the saliva-drenched bee to him yet, to no avail, the dorm leader still continued to cry.

Divus hummed. "I knew it. It appears Schoenheit tried to create another moisturizer by using nectars from both Hibiscus and Hydrangea flowers," he began before walking over to the cabinets.

"Isn't Hibiscus nectar...." Epel trailed off. "I don't know how to say it but...fragile to other elements?" He continued to hush the little baby that continued to wail. Rook, being worried by Vil's sudden tantrum, approached the two and took him in his arms.

"Rather than fragile, Hibiscus nectar has a strong trigger effect on other elements . Pouring more than three drops of its nectar can cause a big error to the chemicals. I believe Schoenheit accidentally dropped it and spilled more than half of the vile into the cauldron. The room smells, he must've inhaled quite the smoke." Divus went back to the cauldron, holding viles with two different colored liquids.

"So, him being in the cabinets meant that he tried to reverse the spell.." Rook hummed as Vil clinged on his chest. Sniffling and hiccuping as he made grabby hands towards Epel who held the little bee.

"Correct," Divus commented. Carefully, the professor poured the liquids into Vil's unfinished product. Meawhile, Epel had given the little bee to Vil, the toddler taking it into his arms and proceeds to cuddle with it.

"Do you have any milk formula?"

"No/Non." replied the two students.

With a click of his tongue, Divus sucked the finished elixir into a syringe. "It's now your turn to find a way on how to make him drink this. By the look in his eyes, you'll be having a hard time to make Schoenheit drink this." He gave the syringe to Epel before bidding his students farewell.

Rook has never been THIS tired. Taking care of a little kid, his dorm leader at that, was something he did underestimate. He has misjudged Vil being a sweetheart as a child. Who knew the most beautiful man in the whole school shared his own mishaps in his early days. Of course, Rook wouldn't be surprised at this point. Vil is full of surprises after all. They have only knew each other for three years, there is still more to uncover.

"Ah..." Epel opened his mouth as he gently moved Vil's head. He tried to make the young one to mimic him but, as soon as Vil's eyes locked overbat the syringe, his small hand went flying, nearly hitting the syringe before burying his face on Rook's chest.

"No!" he whined.

"Vil.." Rook grumbled and took a deep breath before smiling. "Do you want more apples, Roi des Poison?"

"Appie!" cheered little Vil once he looked up at the vice dorm leader.

Green eyes looked towards the young freshman. "Come now, Monsieur Apple Princess. I have errands to run and a uniform to clean."

My, my, it seems little Vil has drooled on our hunter's uniform.

"Are you sure this will work?" asked Epel who placed the child on his bed. The two now resided in Vil's room as it was the safest place for Vil to return back to his normal state. Yes, the baby only has his diaper on so, there was a big possibility for him to be naked once he shifted back.

Rook pulled the syringe's needle out of the small apple slice. The now empty container placed out of reach as he could see Vil's curious eyes staring at it. "I'm sure it will!" Rook gleamed before handing the apple slice to Vil.

The child eagerly took the fruit and ate it. His two sets of teeth biting down on it while his lips began to suck. Epel groaned and rubbed his face. "He's not eating it! I-I mean—"

"Just enjoy your last taste of freedom of speech before he comes back to normal, Epel."

Rook placed the blanket on Vil's head before placing his hands on his hips. He watched Vil eat the whole fruit with a small giggle. The confused freshman blinked, about to respond before a big gush of smoke scattered around the room, leading both males to cough and cover their noses.

"Ugh..."

As they continued to swatting the smoke away from their faces, the blanket now held a bigger body from the little child that once sat on the bed. Once the smoke was cleared off, Rook looked over at the bed and big smile of relief danced acrossed his face.

"Roi des Poison! You're back!"

Vil moved the blanket away from his head and massaged his temples. Groaning and blinking his eyes once he has completely adjusted. "What happened?" he mumbled and looked at Rook and Epel with confusion. "What are the two of you doing in my room?" He furrowed his eyebrows, his sharp purple eyes now held authority and not the sweet little innocence it once carried.

Epel stiffened and gulped. All the relaxation that he felt when Vil was a sapling disappeared. He was nervous now. Vil is back to the way he was.

"I-I.." he tried to think of excuse. Oh, thank Rook for intervening!

"I'll explain everything once you dress up, Roi des Poison. You might get a cold!"

"Why am I naked?!"

[anachronisticcrab]

Nico and Portuguese

I don’t know if this bugged anyone else, but in the Hidden Oracle it didn’t sit right with me that Chiara and Apollo, who were both fluent in Italian, couldn’t understand Paolo when he spoke Portuguese, even though Nico could understand him because he speaks Italian (as seen in BoO when he read the Portuguese inscription in the Church of Bones, and when he was able to translate that Paolo wanted Apollo to have his lucky bandanna). At first I figured it was just weird Uncle Rick discrepancies and stuff, but then I figured why not do a bit of googling to see if I could find an explanation. I did a bit research on Italian dialects and second languages, as well as its connections to Portuguese, Catalan, and Spanish, and I think I discovered why Nico could speak with Paolo and understand Portuguese when no one else could

Just as a forewarning, I want to say is that I don’t speak Italian or Portuguese, I have never been to Italy or Portugal (or any other country that speaks Portuguese), and I am in no way an expert on the subject of any language. If you have any information on this topic, please correct any mistakes I make and feel free to add anything related to this. That being said, let’s get into this monster of a post

First of all, obviously Italian and Portuguese are very close together (they are both derived from Vulgar Latin, and have at least superficial similarities). However, this post will be looking into specific dialects and historical facts that would support Nico understanding Portuguese from Italian whereas the other two people who are confirmed to be fluent have no idea what Paolo says

I started trying to find out a bit more about Italian (because I knew there were differences in the language depending on where you are in the country, because everything in Italy varies from region to region). It turns out there are around 34 recognized spoken dialects within the country of Italy, and Standard Italian comes from Old Tuscany/Florence. The dialects vary from region to region, and even city to city in the country. All the different dialects are vastly different, especially between North Italy and South Italy. If you had a southern Italian speaking their native dialect and a northern Italian speaking theirs, neither of them would have any idea what the other was saying, unlike with different dialects in English, where you still know what the other person is saying. For example, in Venice, the dialect changes depending on the island you are on (ie. Burano to Pellestrina)

If we look specifically at the Veneto Region (where Venice and Verona are, and where Nico is from), one of the dialects is Venetian, although there isn’t a lot of information on the language that I could find, and even less about it’s roots. However I did find out that it is closer to Spanish, Catalan, and Portuguese than it is to Standard Italian (Tuscan), and the language isn’t just spoken in and around Venice, but also in Trieste, Croatia (which led me down the path of Croatia and Venice thanks to Nico visiting there, and I’m gonna make a post about that too now because it’s really cool to me and I’ve got ideas for that) , Slovenia, Mexico and Brazil

Apparently, in certain parts of Brazil, the Talian dialect of Venetian holds co-official status with Portuguese. (I couldn’t find a whole lot of info on this, so I’m not sure where or if this is a true/accurate fact). From around 1875 to the 1920′s, there was a mass boom of Venetian immigrants to Brazil, and of the largest place in the world for people of direct Italian descent is actually Sao Paolo, Brazil. The only article I could find on the Talian dialect cut off two paragraphs in and required a paid subscription to read more (which I couldn’t do since I’m broke), so all I know is that a Portuguese dialect of Venetian is spoken in some areas of Brazil, more of them down south from what I could gather

In my research on Talian, I found out about another dialect, this one of Portuguese. It is called the  Paulistano dialect, and is spoken in and around Sao Paolo, the city I brought up before. Paulistano has direct influences from the Venetian language, as it was created thanks to Northern Italian immigrants who spoke with think foreign accents, and a new dialect was created, and preserves characteristics from Venetian

Not gonna lie, I think that they might just be different names for the same language, but I’m probably wrong about that. As I said, I really couldn’t find a lot of information on this topic so I’m probably very wrong by saying that

On top of that, historically, Venice and Portugal (the places that created both languages) have had extremely close relations. In the 15th century, the Portuguese kings used Venice’s ports to help with the spice trade from Asia, South America, and Europe. There were Portuguese and Spanish people coming in and out of Venice’s docks all the time. This is presumably why Venetian is much closer to Spanish and Portuguese than it is to Italian

As you can see, Venetian and Portuguese have deep rooted histories and simmilarities, and show how Nico would be able to understand Portuguese. Nico would’ve grown up speaking a very similar language to Paolo’s, and Paolo may have grown up speaking a dialect inspired by Venetian

I did try to use Paolo’s name to see if I could get an idea of where in Brazil he might be from, but I have absolutely no idea. Montes was originally a French or Spanish surname, suggesting he might have had French or Spanish roots, but that could also be pure bullshit, because I genuinely don’t know. If he was Spanish somewhere along the line, he most likely lived towards the south, closer to Sao Paolo and probably knew either Talian or Paulistano

At this point, you might be wondering why Apollo or Chiara can’t speak or understand Portuguese, and my answer is the following:

Apollo was probably only fluent in Standard Italian/ Tuscan after the country unified in 1861. After all, Italy is the capital of music, art, and is well known for being sunny and warm all the time, and Apollo is the god of all that stuff. Therefore, he probably learned the standardized language, and didn’t bother with any local dialects (after all, most people don’t speak the individual dialects with tourists/foreigners)

Now Chiara was a bit different. She was from Italy, so she would’ve known a regional dialect, and I came up with an issue there. She could have been from Venice, and that would have thrown this whole thing into the trash. That would have thrown out this idea, and mean that my research would have been for nothing, and that it really was just a stupid error on Rick’s part

So I looked up the origins of her name to check this out, praying to all the gods I could think of that my two days of research and googling wasn’t for nothing. The first thing I saw was that most Italian surnames with an ‘i’ at the end are from northern Italy. Just as I was about to start crying, I found a link on ‘The Noble House of Benvenuti’, and it turns out she was most likely Tuscan. Therefore, she probably speaks a regional dialect of New Tuscan or something of the like, and wouldn’t know Venetian

Also, after a bit more digging just to double check some of the facts in this post, I found out that even if she was Venetian, she might not have spoken it. Since Venice is a dying city, apparently Venetian is a dying language, and most people who are fluent in it are older, and there are lot’s of other dialects in the Veneto region anyways. Nico probably only knows it because he lived in Venice before the city started really dying out! The only reason Paolo can communicate with someone could be because of the whole hotel thing!

[komkommertijd]

F1 2020 Grid as German rap songs

Since the 2020 season has come to an end, I thought it might be a good idea to finally share this thing that I’ve been working on since June. I have no idea as to why or how I had this idea, but I’m sure I’m not the first one to do this, anyway. I’m sorry to all my fellow Germans in advance <3

Disclaimer: I translated all of the lyrics myself so some things might not be completely accurate, for which I can only apologize. I do not agree with the way some rappers portray women, so I made sure to steer clear from those lyrics.

(post under the cut because it got kinda very long whoops)

Lewis - Vintage (RIN)

Oh Lord, wo soll das Ganze enden? Fahr' so schnell, ich wechsel' jede Woche Bremsen

[Oh Lord, where is this supposed to end? Driving so fast, I’m changing brakes every week]

It’s a song about being a champion, living a luxury life, nice clothes, and well...driving fast cars. Any more questions? Rin is one of my favorite German rap artists, so I just had to include his songs, and this one makes you feel like a real badass, just like our king Lewis 😌

Valtteri - In meinem Benz (AK Ausserkontrolle, Bonez MC)

Du siehst mich im Benz sitzen, so wie Lewis Hamilton

[You see me sitting in a Benz, just like Lewis Hamilton]

It’s kind of obvious why I chose that song, right? Other than that specific line there are some more parts about how much the rapper apparently loves his Mercedes and this song just screamed Valtteri to me.

Charles - NENENE (Fero47)

Sitze bald in roten Ferrari Geben Gas in der Hood Ruf' ich danach, "C'est la vie!"

[I’ll soon sit in a red Ferrari Rev up in my hood Shouting “C’est la vie!” afterward]

Ignoring the entire part about Monte Carlo and all the French words, this specific part just always reminds me of Charles when I listen to the song. More badass vibes but less seriously so because I can’t take Fero’s voice that serious at all, which fits Charles.

Sebastian - Ferrari (Eno, MERO)

Roter Ferrari Ich gebe Gas in einem Ferrari Roter Ferrari Yeah, ich sitze tief in einem Ferrari

[Red Ferrari I rev up in a red Ferrari Red Ferrari Yeah, I’m sitting deep inside a Ferrari]

There’s a part about “rolling with [a] bro in a white Mercedes” and my brain said Sewis rights. Other than that, this is once again a rather obvious choice, if not all that up to date anymore. Some lines about racing on the German highway, so of course I had to go for Sebastian with this one.

Max - Fame (Apache207)

Die Rapszene ist nur ein Affenzirkus In dem kleine Kinder gern mit Waffen hantieren Ich steh', wo ich steh', weil ich bin, wer ich bin Und nicht weil hier irgendjemand Apache platziert

[The rap scene is a madhouse Where little kids like to make use of guns I stand where I stand because I am who I am And not because someone places Apache]

This simply gives me Max vibes, I don’t have much more to say as an explanation. It just feels right, with criticism towards mentally “weaker” individuals and the confidence in making a name for oneself based on own achievements and hard work. Also, Apache has become a rather popular musician in the past year(s) (especially to obnoxious 5th graders, all tea no shade), which is just...Max, I won’t elaborate.

Alex - HONDA (Ansu)

Hold on, kommt was Schnell – Konter Dreamer, besonders – Willy Wonka Auto – Honda

[Hold on, there’s something coming Fast - Counterattack Dreamer, special - Willy Wonka Car - Honda]

I mean, it’s a song about a Honda driver? I struggled quite a bit with finding a song for Alex, but when I first listened to this song, my mind threw his name at me in blinking neon letters, so this is the vibe we’re going with - a funky fast Honda driver <3 (PS: I have no clue what the Willy Wonka thing is about but....why not)

Carlos - Habibi (Casar)

Sie schreibt: "Habibi", denn sie vermisst mich Ich fahre weit davon mit mein'n Hermanos

[She texts me “Habibi” because she misses me I drive far away with my hermanos]

I can only listen to the word “hermanos” so many times without my mind associating it with Carlos, so this one was a rather obvious choice for me as well. Also, there are some parts about Spain in this song so I had to be lame and do the obvious with this one.

Lando - 500 PS (Bonez MC, RAF Camora)

Ich drück' aufs Gas, hör' die 500 PS Fahren durch die Stadt, GTA Los Angeles

[I step on the gas, hear the 500 HP Cruising through the city, GTA Los Angeles]

This one’s a solid mainstream German rap song (not that I’d call Lando a mainstream person), liked to some extent by most people, and it gets you moving, which reminds me a lot of Lando. Cars and mentions of a video game make for a hit and Lando unites just that in person as well.

Daniel - Emotions 2.0 (Ufo361, Céline)

Baby, nimm einen Schluck Dom P. für die Emotions Ich erhöhe deine Dosis So viel Schmuck Mehr Drip als ein Ocean

[Baby take a sip Dom P for the emotions I’m increasing your dosage So much jewelry More drip than an ocean]

A bittersweet love song with rich boy summer vibes and one of my favorite German songs to be released this year, in fact, it’s my most listened to song on my phone, make for a combination that just screams Daniel to me. This song hits different when driving into the sunset in a fancy car or when biking through town at 1:30 am on three cans of Red Bull (believe me, I tried), and always reminds me of better times. It’s the ideal song to sing and rap along to, so that matches Daniel just fine.

Esteban - Einsneunzig (Brown-Eyes White Boy)

Bin fast einsneunzig, stell' mich auf die Bündel, das' ein Weltrekord Lass' die Zeit Revue passier'n, selbe Jungs und selber Ort

[I’m almost 1.90, stand on a wad of cash, that’s a world record Let’s recall the past, same guys and same place]

1.90 meters as a reference to Esteban’s height, obviously, simply made sense to me, once again. The second line reminds me of his feud with Pierre, so I had to choose this song. It’s better than Ratten im Hof (rats in the yard), and this reminds me of a wannabe gangster, which just screams Esteban to me, I’m sorry <3

Pierre - DAS RENNEN (RIN)

Ich hoff', eines Tages, wir gewinn'n das Rennen Wie bei Red Dead Redemption Irgendwann der Letzte wie Shanks Spinner Rims glänzen

[I hope one day we win the race Just like in Red Dead Redemption One day the last like Shanks Spinner rims are shining]

I know no one will believe this story but I started working on this post like half a year ago and I chose that song for Pierre back then and uhm, manifestation worked, I guess? Once again, I’m a big fan of Rin’s music, so choosing this song for Pierre is a bit like selfcare. The lyrics mention changing the world and well, so far Pierre has as least changed my world 😌

Daniil - One Night Stand (Capital Bra)

Ty moja ljubimaja Takaja diwnaja, krasiwaja-ja Sprawjedliwaja, njepobjedimaja Ty moja-ja, Baby, ty moja-ja

[You are my darling Such a wondeful, beauty Fair, invincible You’re mine baby, you’re mine]

I really hope I got that translation more or less right but other than that, I didn’t simply choose that song based on the Russian part. It’s a song we used to listen to a lot a few years ago and one of those from the days where Capital Bra was famous but less so than he is today. It reminds me of simpler times and it’s a pretty vibey song that, if you allow it to, draws you in and makes you dance. I have a soft spot for Daniil and the song reminds me a bit of him.

Lance - Bronx (Veysel)

Du musst doppelt zahlen, deshalb krieg' ich es umsonst Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, eine Villa irgendwo Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, ein paar Villen irgendwo

[You have to pay double that’s why I get it for free Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, a mansion somewhere Audemars, Yves Saint Laurent, a few mansions somewhere]

This is a song that you have to listen to on high volume in a fast car, one that once again has really badass vibes. It’s nice to rap along to and hard not to move to. The rich boy vibes in the chorus that I’ve included in this post are pretty inevitable and logically, I had to associate that with Lance. When I turn this song on, everyone enjoys it, and I think Lance deserves to evoke that emotion in everyone as well.

Sergio - AVENTADOR (Dardan, Eno, Noah)

Roll' im Aventador Ich fahr' grad vor Gebe Gas, sag': "¡Adiós!"

[Roll in an Aventador I hit the road Step on the gas, say “¡Adiós!”]

I mean yeah, I could have chosen that song only because of the Adiós but that’s a bit lame even for me. Instead, the entire fast car vibe reminded me a lot of Checo. I’ve always had a bit of a soft spot for him and this year he once again showed people ([coughs] my brother) that he’s been severely underestimated. So stepping on the gas and outpacing everyone else felt like the right vibe.

Kimi - Sorry Not Sorry (Monet192, Takt32, badmómzjay)

Was du für Karriere machst, mach' ich als Hobby Was du für Probleme hast, interessiert keinen

[What you made your career, I do as a hobby What problems you have, no one cares]

The title itself embodies Kimi and so does the entire song. The not giving a shit vibe, paired with the mention of the hobby thing as an indirect reference to the famous Kimi quote about seeing his job more as a hobby, are just 100% Kimi. I really couldn’t have found a better song for him. 

Antonio - Maserati (RAF Camora)

Capo dei capi Trip noch im Alfa, doch bald Maserati

[Capo dei capi Trip still in an Alfa but soon in a Maserati]

I did very much not choose the song because “capo dei capi” (the boss of bosses) is a mafia related thing, but because of the Alfa part, duh. Roadtrips in an Alfa along the Adriatic coast are cool and all but a Maserati is obviously the main goal, and that reminds me of Antonio quite a lot ~for some reason~. The entire part about making it far in life without a “serious” job is just very F1, so the vibes are there. Happy very belated birthday Toni <3

Romain - HOCH (CRO)

Alles holt dich down, lass es einfach los Und die Dinge unter dir sind gar nicht mehr so groß Ich schau' nach oben und auf einmal geht's hoch

[Everything drags you down, just let it go And the things below you are not as big anymore I look up and suddenly it goes upwards]

This song is just very peaceful and calms my mind when I listen to it, which radiates the same comforting vibe as Romain. The topic of rising despite things dragging you down are a very prominent topic here and reminded me a lot of him, especially with him leaving Haas and everything around that. It just feels nice to listen to a bit of an uplifting song once in a while, and this one does it in a way that still allows you to feel calm and safe, which is something I associate with Romain a lot.

Kevin - Vorbei (Nico Rosseburg, Sierra Kidd)

Sag mir bitte, wie passe ich die Zeit? Der Augenblick war schön, doch es ist vorbei

[Please tell me, how do I pass the time? The moment was nice but now it’s over]

With Kevin leaving F1, I had to go for this song for him. It’s a bit more of a sad topic (so am I with the knowledge of him not being there next year) but without making the entire thing sound melancholic. I only really learned to appreciate Kevin this year and I’ll miss having him around, so this song kind of fits that idea for me.

George - 20 Zoll MAE (Celo&Abdi, Bonez MC)

Ich fahr' mit Schrittgeschwindigkeit, so wie ein Don Hättest gerne meine Felgen, aber wirst sie nicht bekommen

[I drive at walking pace like a Don You’d like to have my rims but won’t get them]

Making this solely about driving at walking pace would be a bit mean but there’s a part in the song soon after about looking beautiful in a Mercedes, so that’s pretty much George. The song just carries that fun vibe and the subtle (not really) flex, which makes it great to listen to if you want to get in a happier mood. It’s a song about Mercedes rims, of course I had to choose George 😔

Nicholas - Standard (KitschKrieg, SFR, Trettmann, Gzuz, Gringo, Ufo361)

Treff' mich in Miami, fliege nur noch First-Class Nur noch unterwegs, kriege Heimweh

[Meet me in Miami, only flying first class anymore Only on the road anymore, getting homesick]

More ~rich boy vibes~ and a song that has been playing what feels like 24/7 on MTV Germany the last two years. It got so bad that some people around me still reply in the trademark Gzuz voice when someone uses the word “standard”. Anyway, I associate this song with Nicholas because just like KitschKrieg did with their first “own” song, Nicholas has joined the game and left an impression on everyone, in one way or another, and I’m willing to see/hear more of that :)

[keep-it-i-resign]

Fic Writer Asks

tagged by the lovely @vampcoffeegyrl23 I am soooo sorry this has taken over a week! I promise I was just busy away from my computer and using mobile is not the way to go about answering these! 😅

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

6 on AO3 and 6 on ffn.net. I haven't used the ffn.net account in years, i.e 2013 (and therefore my user name isn't even the same) so those 6 stories are different from my AO3 ones. I don't post most of what I write and now that I'm in my mid-20s with a few published papers behind me - I'm much more confident in my ability to write a cohesive and interesting story so expect more posted!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

17,425 words which isn't bad for only 6 fics with two of those stories having additional chapters coming soon.

3. How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

On AO3? Just 1, which is The Flash and by extension Stargate SG-1 for the crossover I did for Snowells Week this year. Counting ffn.net that's 3 more with Castle, Doctor Who, and Firefly. Over my lifetime of writing fic for myself? I think only 7 more. Stargate SG-1, Stargate Atlantis, Sanctuary, Harry Potter, Star Trek: Voyager, Star Trek: TNG, and Left 4 Dead. Left 4 Dead isn't much of a fanfic but I did use the zombie types as place holders in an original story until I developed my own.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

I'll Be Waiting (The Flash - Caitlin/Harry)

Well... This is Awkward (The Flash - Caitlin/Harry, Frost/Nash, Caitlin/Nash, and Frost/Harry)

Rewind Time (The Flash - Caitlin/Harry)

Through the Gate (The Flash/Stargate SG-1 - Caitlin/Eowells)

Harvest Season (The Flash - Caitlin/Harry)

5. What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

I don't write angst much and I haven't posted many stories yet but of the ones posted I guess "I'll Be Waiting" is the angstiest.

6. What's the fic you've written with the happiest ending?

"Well...This is Awkward" has a pretty happy ending with everyone alive and together. Or maybe "Twilight of the Gods" because ReverseSnow/ReverseFrost happens and there is hope of bringing everything lost back and balance the universe again. I guess it depends on your definition of what constitutes as a happy ending. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

7. Do you write crossovers? If so, what is the craziest one you've written?

I've only written one - The Flash/Stargate SG-1 crossover. I don't normally think about crossovers just because the shows I watch are so vastly different they can't really work or they are already in the same universe with the canon crossovers. I'm also not always a fan of reading them because they can get chaotic quick and characterization takes a dive in order to fit characters into other universes/situations. I admire anyone who can write it well though!

As a side note: I did have a thought about a Snowells into the Arkham universe fic just because I have been replaying the Batman Arkham video games which I might give a shot at.

8. Do you write smut? If so what kind?

👀I wrote one smutty story years ago and it's terrible because I was young and naïve. I haven't tried recently but I'm not opposed to giving it a shot now. I have a few ideas on a prompt list I have for Snowells already so it's really a matter of when will I get to it!

9. Do you respond to comments. why or why not?

I do when I can! I like to get feedback from my readers and having an open dialogue of what they liked or disliked is important for me! I want to know what my audience enjoyed and what to improve on! Responding to them also shows them I saw that they said and appreciate what they had to say! 🥰

10. Have you ever received hate on a fic?

Surprisingly - no, even on my old and terribly written stuff. I'm perfectly open to criticism but hate? If you don't like it, you don't like it but others might. Why spend the time spreading negativity when the world has enough of it?

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

As far as I know - no.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No but given enough time I could probably translate mine. It would be grammatically atrocious because I rarely translate from English into any of the languages I know. It's normally the other way around! I'd definitely need a Beta who is fluent to correct my mistakes.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

No but it's definitely something I'd try! I co-wrote an original story with a few friends of mine years ago in high school and enjoyed it. I like the idea of getting to talk and bounce ideas off of someone who enjoys the same fandoms and character as me! I haven't really done that since I grew apart from one of my friends from high school who I did that with.

14. What's your all time favorite ship?

What kind of question is this? Do people actually have an ultimate ship? Is that even possible? I have ships from several fandoms and sometimes multiple ships within a fandom. Most of the time I have a main ship from a fandom but that doesn't mean I discount any of the other ones that I or others enjoy as well. I'll throw out a few that I still got out and read for in order of what I read most often (either new stuff or re-reads) to what I read occasionally, at least according to my AO3 favorite tags.

Snowells (all variations) - The Flash

Jack O'Neill/Sam Carter - Stargate SG-1

Helen Magnus/Nikola Tesla - Sanctuary

Harry/Hermione - Harry Potter

William Murdoch/Julia Ogden - Murdoch Mysteries

Phil/ Melinda - Agents of SHIELD

Kathryn Janeway/Tom Paris - Star Trek: Voyager

Kate Fleming/Steve Arnott - Line of Duty

I will occasionally go check what kind of fics the fandom writes when I start a show just out of curiosity. Sometimes you can tell if there is fandom hate between ships by doing so and I know to steer clear, especially if I ship a lesser ship/non-canon ship. Also - the number of canon-divergence or rewrites will tell you if the shows writers start being ridiculous *cough* The Flash *cough* and whether it's worth getting attached at all.

15. What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

Hoo boy. I have a drive full of them. Most of which aren't even close to being posted. My biggest one right now is a complete re-write of The Flash dealing with a what if scenario of Earth-1 Tess Morgan being pregnant the night that Thawne kills them both and he chooses to birth the kid rather than let it die with her. It's set a few years earlier (so 18/19 years stuck in the past rather than the original 15 that the show has it) so the kid isn't Jesse but it changes how season 1 plays out and definitely how season 2 plays out when Harry finds out about the kid while dealing with the Jesse/Zoom issue. Plus it's Snowells too and I want to deal with Barry's mistakes and the consequences of them better than the show did since the show just kind of brushes them off? For some reason? I wanted things to have a little more consequence because some of the mistakes made are egregious and then they acted like it never happened which bothers me. It's a beast of a project and I'm - unfortunately- a perfectionist and a completionist. I'm thinking an episode per chapter rewrite but right now it's in bits and pieces and a lot of notes on how episodes would play out differently with an added character and dynamic.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and scene positioning. I can write out the dialogue for a story quickly with the bare bones of the scene and movements playing out. After that, it takes me ages to expand the scene and fill in the bits between speaking lines because I can see the piece play out in my head and putting that to paper accurately and engagingly without being overwhelming is a multi-layered process.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Some of this is normal, you know, like grammar and spelling. My brain moves faster than I type so words or bit of phrases end up missing and I later have to fix it. I'm also a Southerner who grew up watching a ton of British shows so a lot of the way I phrase things isn't commonly used anywhere. I have to spend a lot of time double checking things like that. I think my biggest one is not knowing how to end stories satisfactorily. I haven't posted many fics because it's hard to post them when you don't know how to wrap everything up.

18. What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

It depends on whether it's an established part of a character or story and whether or not I'm comfortable with the language. Like with Sherloque - it's established he'll say something in French and then repeat it in English. I took 3 years of French so I'm comfortable writing it and it fits the character and situation. But take Cisco, we know he speaks Spanish, but it's never really shown in the show. So fics that I've read where he breaks into Spanish can be distracting as we've never seen him do it - even in dire circumstances. I also never took Spanish in school and I only know rudimentary pieces (I took Mandarin and Latin instead), so I'm unlikely to use it in any fic I write unless the circumstances warrant it (say - Cisco is talking to a grandparent or a meta struggling with English).

But again, it depends on the situation, what we know of the character, and how comfortable I am with the language enough to get it correct and in character. Any fic writer who can get the situation and character down while using a secondary language, and not make it distracting deserves applause!

19. What was the first fandom you wrote for?

Hit me with a hard one why don't you? 🤣 I think it was Stargate SG-1 or maybe it was Stargate Atlantis. You're asking me to think back over a decade and a half ago to when I started reading and writing fic at the tender age of 7 or 8. I'm fairly certain it was one of those two fandoms and it might've been a crossover. I do remember writing part of it on an old Gateway computer running Windows '98 with a glass monitor that was mine and my sisters. The other half was written on an electric type-writer that I owned because this was before laptops were widely available and affordable.

20. What's your favorite fic you've written?

It's a tie between "Twilight of the Gods" and "I'll Be Waiting". "Twilight of the Gods" because I got to show off a few of my degrees (History and Classics, I couldn't shoehorn in my others but they are science related and that doesn't quite fit that story). "I'll Be Waiting" is a favorite because it's a big middle finger to whoever / collective group wrote The Flash season 7. I'm still pissed off at how the Wells plotline was dealt with and let's not get started on the whole Chillblaine/Kramer/Forces as kids of WA plots (ewwwwwww 🤢). I'd need a whole new post to talk about how tired I am of the WA kids showing up (because screw how that'll effect the timeline, right?) and the reliance on the future to drive what decisions are made (because, again, screw how bad that would be for the timeline - it's not like we have seen how much that effects things before right?) 😒

Phew.....That was longer than I expected, honestly, but a lot of fun!

Tagging whoever wants to talk about their works because you are all wonderful people who should get a chance to share!

[thelibraryiscool]

9, 10, 11, 32, 36

Hello friend! Ask and you shall receive.

9. Favorite class out of everything you’ve ever taken and why?

This is tough because I’ve loved so many of my classes. Easier for Math: Math Bio & Math Modeling. Bc the profs were fantastic, the projects were really exciting (one time we wrote code to mimic the style of abstract paintings), and I realized that I enjoyed applied math more than pure math. For Lit... I could pick any one of about half the courses I’ve had? To name one, my second English class in college, on Shakespeare Text and Performance, was huge because it finally tipped me over into trying to major in English. The prof was great, and funny, and taught me close reading, and I love Twelfth Night and Henry V so much to this day bc of it. (But really - I could make the case for half a dozen more at least)

10. Least favorite class ever and why?

It’d have to be geoscience freshman fall. I don’t know why I thought I’d enjoy geoscience, but I think what I discovered was that even though it’s very cute how into it the profs and the TA were, there’s only so much excitement you can scrounge up over rocks unless you’ve got that innate love for rocks in the first place. I fell asleep in class in front of the profs, and it was my lowest grade in college. BUT it’s also the reason I’m friends with one of my very good friends atm, so I actually can’t regret taking it.

11. Current favorite class and why?

As it happens I love all my classes atm! (I am very bad at these questions huh) Maybe my favorite is the art history class I’m taking, on the Image in Antiquity. The professor is Very Cool, and hugely impressive, but -- can you believe it -- genuinely nice as well? And the readings are challenging me to think in ways I haven’t much before. I know very little about the topic, and the class is mostly Art History grad students, so I’m learning lots, and people are very on top of the discussion, so it flows wonderfully. 

32. Describe your favorite teacher/professor and why you like them.

Again, I definitely have more than one. But maybe I’ll talk about E, bc she’s sort of who @double-book-ed and I would both like to be when we grow up. She’s super smart, and interdisciplinary, and has a way of making people do their best work in discussion. She’s also really helpful outside of class, and very frank with how academia & academic life work these days. She ran a reading group when we were in undergrad that’s shaped my thinking ever since. She cares about her students. I also think she’s very disciplined, and knows how to get things done. Plus she’s got a cute dog and makes a mean cup of tea xD

36. Best feedback you’ve ever gotten on something academic?

Now’s when I’d like to be able to turn to my undergrad essays and sort through them, but they’re tragically an ocean away. Thankfully, sometimes I have photos, which is how I can say that E once left a comment on one of my essays that began ‘Not quite perfect, but there are moments, of perfection. Or at least moments that I wished I had written!’ and ended ‘And the prose is just gorgeous, especially the show-stopping ends of paragraphs. Beautiful work,’ which has got to be one of the nicest things anyone’s ever said to me. On a less exciting but more recent note, I was quite pleased that some feedback I got last year noted my ‘excellent engagement with the detail of the OId French, accompanied by an intelligent and accurate nuancing of the [...] translation,’ because it was my first time working with Old French, and I wasn’t at all confident about it.

ask me studyblr things

[legaltranslation]

Legal Translation Services In Dubai Creates Way Forward In International Trade

Because international trade is highly regulated, so there is no margin in case of even a single error. However, without the proper planning of how you can deal with the legal matters to support your initiative of international trade, such as translation of legal documents, your expansion efforts will suffer from serious setbacks. Hence, legal translation services in dubai are one of the great assets for you as it translates all your legal documents and it creates your way forward in international trade.

Are you ready to take your business to new and international markets? Growth into new markets means you have to serve new customers, unique revenue opportunities for your business and often rewards the risk-takers with a great return, but it also comes with the language and other barriers that you may not consider and in the long run, it lead to some serious consequences.

What Should Legal Documents Be Translated That Are Required For International Trade?

For any international marketing having the relevant cultural insight ensures that your business will stand out from the crowd in a positive way. Similarly, there is nothing worse than poorly translated legal documents, particularly when it comes to business expansion. However, the preparation of legal documents requires special attention. 

For every business looking to trade internationally, there are certain types of legal documents that will come across and it is the fact that your legislation and law differ from the country in which you want to trade and this will affects the translation of your legal documents. 

Each border zone has its particular requirements that influence which documents need to be translated and do not need a translation. So, if you want to enter the international market, here is the list of documents that require translation and it will surely make your life easier.

1. Financial documents

It is clear that there are a huge amount of financial documents that need to be translated from your bank account to your international supplier’s bank account. For instance, you open an account in a bank where the finances from your partners will come because in any contract, there is a separate section where pricing and other financial issues are prescribed. So, you have to get the translation of all the documents that are directly related to finances, such as all financial statements.  

2. Patent

In international trade, you will need to translate the patents into all languages. Because the patent is a legal document, its translation is crucial and must be carried out by experts when it comes to the law, every word matters. That’s why the translator should be specialized in this particular field to avoid any mistakes.

3. Certificates

As soon as you enter into the realities of international trade, you will come across various certificates. Are you thinking about what type of certificates you will need to be translated? Here is the list of types of certificates that need translation for your international business:

Inspection certifications

Landing certificates

Safety and health certificates

Certificate of delivery verification

Origin certificate

Certificate of international import

4. Operational documents

There are legal documents in relation to international trade that you may need to be translated to make sure that your business runs smoothly. Some of these documents are invoices, reports, and packaging of products, waybills and loans.

5. Audit documents

The results of independent audits play a key role in the success of the international market. There is a double need for translation with auditing because firstly, you have to translate audit papers in order to attract your partners and in another case, an audit may suddenly come to you and documentation is required related to your international partners. If this documentation is in French, you will need to be translated.

6. Import and export contracts

The contract of international trade is legal in nature and a mistake in these documents is simply unaffordable. As the contracts are drawn up between you and your partners, as it is the mini-plan of how your relations with your partners will be built, so it needs to be translated. To avoid any misunderstanding, professional translation services are required.

In a nutshell, international trade is a very complex area and the documentation you use in the pursuit of international trading should be carefully translated and reviewed by experts and professionals.

With the careless translation, the message of your documents is altered in many ways and its consequences are severe. Hence, legal translation services are the gateway to the success of your business internationally as it creates your way by accurately convey your message to the foreign markets that you are targeting.

Why Do You Need Legal Translation Services For International Expansion?

There are some common strategies for the companies who are looking to increase their client base and revenue and these are international trade, overseas expansion and incorporation with foreign partners. You can lead to quantifiable business success by making your products or services available to new foreign markets. Similarly, it comes with many challenges, such as differences in legal systems and languages and you need legal translation services in dubai to deal with these barriers. 

International trade is a complex venture, but the benefits you get from this exceed the potential pitfalls. It is the fact that the documentation is the heart of international trade that’s why you should be prepared for the Translation in dubai near me that is required, such as each document involved from exporting to contracting and shipping to banking, and all content of marketing and for the promotion of products. 

So, with international trade, you can get many potential possible outcomes as it opens the door of success for your business and particularly, it gives you access to countless new customers that you never considered. By availing of professional legal translation services, you can bring your business to international markets as it ensures accuracy by managing all your legal documents that are needed.

[citylightsbooks]

Signaling Through the Flames: Brandon Shimoda, Author of The Grave on the Wall

During this time of uncertainty, we’ve asked City Lights authors how they’re doing, what they’re reading, and any advice they have for our community. Their responses have been very inspiring to us, and we hope that sharing them will inspire you as well.

“Signaling Through the Flames” gets its title from Lawrence Ferlinghetti’s timeless work, Poetry As Insurgent Art, which beings with the line, “I am signaling you through the flames …” This line is, in turn, taken from Antonin Artaud in his landmark book The Theatre and Its Double, in which he says  “If there is still one hellish, truly accursed thing in our time, it is our artistic dallying with forms, instead of being like victims burnt at the stake, signaling through the flames.” Follow the hashtag #SignalingThruTheFlames across all our platforms on social media to follow the complete series.

City Lights: Where are you? 

Brandon Shimoda: I'm in a small one-bedroom apartment in Tucson, AZ, with my partner and our 1½ year-old daughter. We've been self-isolating for two weeks now, leaving once a day to go to the grocery store or the park (near to our house, which has several wide-open fields) or further into the desert (we found a trail that leads to a small pond where we introduced our daughter to the pleasure of throwing rocks into water).

What books make you feel inspired?

Inspiration feels like outer space! Fantastical, out of reach. Although, there have been moments, but they are fleeting. And by the time I realize that I am feeling inspired, the feeling is gone. That being said, these books/companions have all been providing flashes and distillations of possibility, intimacy, electricity, connection, which I hesitate to translate into anything other than simply being present, i.e. reading: Min Jin Lee's Pachinko; Mahmoud Darwish's Memory for Forgetfulness (translated from the Arabic by Ibrahim Muhawi); Salah Al Hamdani's Baghdad, Adieu (translated from the Arabic and French by Sonia Alland); Tahar Ben Jelloun's This Blinding Absence of Light (translated from the French by Linda Coverdale); Martin Luther King, Jr.'s Stride Toward Freedom, Silvina Ocampo's Forgotten Journey (translated from the Spanish by Suzanne Jill Levine and Katie Lateef-Jan), and countless books that I read with my daughter every night (our favorite right now is Julie Flett's Birdsong). 

What gives you hope in this moment? (And/or what are you thankful for?)

I read a poem today by the Malay poet Kulleh Grasi (in translation by Pauline Fan) that included the line: "Shaking one's head is a sign of hope still." The poem is called "Bianglala Seridan," and is in the book Tell Me, Kenyalang (Circumference Books, 2019). It gives me hope to think that a gesture of disagreement or disappointment or refusal or disgust, etc. could be considered a gesture of hope.

Any advice that you’d like to share with our community?

I feel ill-equipped to share advice. But I'll share something I've been doing, which is not exactly novel, but has been therapeutic: transcribing my dreams. First thing in the morning. I'm trying to be more intentional/diligent about doing this. Because I believe that dreams offer an accurate—maybe even more truthful—account of what is happening, including of what I am (actually) thinking, even if their messages and meanings are hard-won. 

***

Brandon Shimoda is the author of six books of poetry, most recently The Desert (Song Cave, 2018) and Evening Oracle (Letter Machine Editions, 2016), which received the William Carlos Williams Award from the Poetry Society of America. His memoir and book of mourning, The Grave on the Wall (City Lights, 2019) received the 2020 PEN Open Book Award. His writings on Japanese-American incarceration have appeared in/on The Asian American Literary Review, Densho, Hyperallergic, The Margins, and The New Inquiry, and he has given talks on the subject at the University of Arizona, Columbia University, Fairhaven College, and the International Center of Photography. He is also the co-editor, with Thom Donovan, of To look at the sea is to become what one is: An Etel Adnan Reader (Nightboat Books, 2014). Born in the San Fernando Valley, California, he lives, for now, in Tucson, AZ.

[agoddamn]

Just out of curiosity, let’s go through some of these personal skills and how they were localized. Cut because it got long...

不思議な魅力 / Supportive This does actually describe what the ability does, but it’s dry, which is an especially unfortunate choice for the main character. I’d go with Mysterious Charisma or something along those lines. Mystic Charm? Hell, if character length is a problem even just Charismatic has a more special feeling to it than Supportive, which is a quality you look for in a bra moreso than a main character.

ダーティファイト  / Highwayman This is literally just “Dirty Fight[ing]” in katakana, so it’s not like it was confusing. I have no idea why they changed it, given that dirty fighting cleverly both describes the ability itself (it only activates when the enemy can’t attack back) and Ashura’s struggle as a character (he hates himself for being an honorless thug) so...what was gained from changing it to Highwayman, which is just a synonym for his base class?

農地の主 / Forager Descriptive, which is good! My only complaint is that the original title, Farmland Master, implies a lot of competence on her part that Forager doesn’t capture. Nature Master? Living off the Land, if we get creative?

おっちょこちょい / Mischievous Completely different term. The Japanese is Scatterbrain. The deeply confusing thing is that this completely changes the nature of her ability, instead implying that she strips people on purpose. I don’t get...why they did this...

お転婆 / Fearsome Blow Completely different term! The Japanese is Tomboy. I guess we’re not allowed to say she’s a tomboy in America. The Japanese word for tomboy supposedly comes from the Dutch ontembaar, which means spirited/indomitable/untameable. Which actually says a lot about the Japanese perception of the term “tomboy”--it’s not “boyish girl” in the sense that we imagine boyish girls, IE short-haired and pink-hating and sports-loving, but “boyish” in the sense of not being quiet and submissive. Personality over appearance. Anyway, in light of that I can understand not using the literal word tomboy in English but Fearsome Blow is just dry. Doesn’t reflect on her personality at all. Even Ferocious Blow would be better.

爆炎使い / Pyrotechnics What always confused me here is that pyrotechnics almost always refers to decorative explosions. You use pyrotechnics to describe tricks or flashy shows, not actual bombs designed to kill people, which is what Saizou is doing. It’s like saying a flamethrower and a flashlight are interchangeable because they both involve light that you point places. I don’t think 爆炎使い is an existing term; the only results on Google for it are Saizou and a Yu-Gi-Oh card. Literally, it’s something like Explosive Flame Messenger/Carrier. Probably a double meaning on Saizou carrying explosive bombs and being an explosive bomb. Hilariously, FEH completely gave up trying to translate this term (which is also his character title in that game) and just rendered it as Angry Ninja. I’d just translate it as Incendiary, trying to keep the double meaning intact.

小さな声援 / Quiet Strength This one is accurate to Sakura’s personality--which is good--but doesn’t describe the effect and misses out on the fact that all three (!) Hoshido princesses have linked personal skills. Aqua’s is Healing Voice, Hinoka’s is Rallying Cry (localization was actually dead on here), and Sakura’s is Little Cheer/Soft Cheer. They’re all voice-related. Localization lost this theme by changing Aqua’s to Healing Descant (a type of melody) and Sakura’s to Quiet Strength. At the very least, Sakura and Hinoka have reciprocal effects so the names really ought to match. They actually did this excellently with the Nohr sisters (Lily’s Poise/Rose’s Thorn) so it’s a shame the Hoshido sisters lost out.

ぼんやり / Optimist Another totally different term. The Japanese is Absent-minded/Airhead. Like, did they feel bad about calling Setsuna dumb? But still left all her supports about how dumb she is? Even more confusingly, Kisaragi’s personal skill is named almost identically. Nobody would do that on purpose. I admit that this one is tricky to name--neither Airhead nor Optimist suggest getting extra-effective healing, but at least Airhead describes her personality. She’s more implacable than optimistic. I’d try to get creative with this one and go with something like Help From My Friends if space allowed, or just fall back to Airhead/Head in the Clouds if airhead sounds too mean.

悪あがき / Triple Threat Once more, different term. The Japanese is something like wasted effort/struggling in vain. I think the implication is that you’re wasting your energy trying to melee Hinata? This is definitely a weird one. Honestly dunno that I’d have a better suggestion; Triple Threat at least gets across that it procs against three weapon types. Last Stand, perhaps.

軍略伝授 / Perspicacious This is another one of those where the game suddenly whips out obscure vocabulary for no apparent reason. When’s the last time you heard someone use perspicacious outside of an English test? The Japanese is Strategy Instructor (or something like “offering strategic advice”), which is why it buffs other units’ hit rate. I can kinda see the connection to being perceptive, but perspicacious, for all its syllables, fails to describe that Yukimura is instructing other people. Strategize would have done the job perfectly well.

勝利への執念 / In Extremis The Japanese is something like “victory through persistence”. This is a case where I actually like how it communicates the ability--it activates under extreme circumstances, when she’s on the edge--but I question the terminology. Latin is a pretty specific choice in language. What about the soft butch French rebel artist says “yeah, Latin is the right choice here”? 

風の血 / Wind Disciple Another case of losing the theme. Fuuga, Flora, and Rinka, as the scions of their elemental tribes, all have abilities that go [element] Blood, implying they’re the distant descendants of their founding dragons. They got it with Rinka and Flora, but for some reason fucked up Fuuga.

美しき王 / Peacebringer Japanese is Beautiful King, hahaha. I actually like that the English gets the meaning of the ability--and his role in the story--across, but the Japanese implication that Izana is so beautiful that everyone around him forgets how to fight is really goddamn funny.

怪力 / Puissance The one I’ve been complaining about the most! Why French? Why this word? The Japanese is a pretty simple “super strength”. I totally understand the urge to jazz it up, but this just seems like the worst way to do it. It’s not an easily recognizable term and the diction doesn’t match her character at all, localized OR original. I like the idea of rendering it as Atlas to emphasize her role as Elise’s pillar plus a sly reference to the Charles Atlas strongman stuff, but you could go a million different ways here. Just...not puissance.

奇襲任務 / Opportunist Man, I’m so used to Ambush Duty that I had to look up who Opportunist was actually attached to...which I think says a lot about its success as a character descriptor. Opportunist technically jives with the ‘surprise attack’ part of the Japanese, but not remotely Belka’s personality. The ‘duty’ bit is important here because that’s Belka’s role, she does what she’s told. She’s mechanical. Camilla even likens her to a broken doll. Opportunist generally implies more agency, someone actively taking chances. 

青の踊り / Fancy Footwork Azure Dance. I guess Indigo Dance would flow better with Awakening’s localization. I like the dance nod but it’s a shame to miss out on the color wink.

冷血 / Pragmatic Cold-blooded. In this case I understand why it was changed--”cold-blooded” is too close to Flora’s “Ice Blood” (though that didn’t stop them giving Setsuna and Kisaragi literally the same ability?)--and the meaning is mostly intact (pragmatic can just mean simple and efficient, but cold-blooded means cruel). Leon has a couple of other ice-themed symbols in the game, though--his personal weapon, Leon’s Icy Blade, and general references to being cold and heartless. It’s also an ironic contrast to his tome, a tree of life. Cold-blooded fit really well with all that and Pragmatic doesn’t.

ひろい食い / Goody Basket sdfkfghdf the Japanese for this one is like...indiscriminate appetite/open-minded eater/someone who eats stuff they picked up on the floor. Which is why she’s regaining HP, Velour’s just eating random shit she finds. Goody Basket doesn’t remotely capture how funny this is. I’d have called it Five-Second Rule.

乙女心の躍動 / Bibliophile Bibliophile does hint at the effect, but...just looking at a list I honestly thought this was Eponine’s. She’s the one explicitly described as the story-lover. The Japanese is something like Liveliness of a Maiden’s Heart--so it’s Ophelia’s own earnest, girly version of Odin’s Aching Blood. It’s admittedly hard not to have Something Blood on a female character sound kind of lewd or a euphemism for masturbation. What about Pounding Heart?

臆病 / Guarded Bravery Just the opposite meaning here, the Japanese is Timid. Were they afraid of making him look bad?

だまし討ち / Fierce Counter Foul Play! The one that started all this. To copy-paste, the implication is that either male enemies underestimate Foleo’s ferocity because of his feminine appearance or that Foleo is the type of guy who has no compunctions about kicking another guy in the balls (he IS his father’s son), take your pick. Fierce Counter is dry and doesn’t indicate the proc (male enemies) at all.

[helshades]

Tip of the Nose: Eaux Thicker Than Water

Today, in our great series on the history of perfume(ry) that nobody really asked me for, I reply to a simple comment and manage to make it into a very long lecture on perfume concentration. Stay yourselves with flagons!

Eau de toilette or eau de parfum, perfume is never sold pure but diluted in a water-alcohol solution. In principle, the percentage of actual perfume determines the commercial appellation. In principle.

In any case: mind the French! Your reputation may depend on it.

——————————

@katbelleinthedark​:

Yes good. I have a lot of eau de toilette(s?) as I'm #poor&cheap and I never wear that as I always forget to use it. I once had the same bottle for 13 years.

Well, I occasionally wear perfumes from bottles issued in the 1970s and 1980s, so if the old bout of snobbery catches you off-guard sometime you can still pretend it is ~vintage~ juices you’re keeping. I’ve just placed a bid on EBay for a ‘perfume extract’ bottle of Jean Patou’s mythical Joy (definitely not the horrid recent Dior release of the same name) that was left unopened in a shoebox for decades, meaning there’s no way to tell if it’s actually wearable or not. I have issues. Mostly with my banker. [Edit: as it turned out, in a cruel twist of fate, that the bottle in question was actually a dummy. The seller, overtaken by doubt, finally broke the seal open and confirmed his worst suspicions. No Joy for me this year.]

In any case, it will be eau de toilette or eaux de toilette, not eau(x) de toilettes or you’d be suggesting that you’ve been lining up jars of toilet water on some cupboard shelf for years—not that I be judging, but still. Others might.

Although, technically, les toilettes in reference to the crapp... er, the loo, has only been a plural since the 20th century, and it isn’t necessarily true of all variants of French since the Belgians for instance still speak of la toilette. In any, the euphemism is transparent: it’s the equivalent of ‘the lavatory’. The French version mostly comes from the locution cabinet de toilette, referring to the small, private room specifically used (by rich people) to ready themselves for the day, and gradually, as hygienic practices progressed throughout the 19th century, for hygiene purposes as well: in other words, the equivalent to the English ‘bathroom’—and indeed it ended up being replaced by the latter’s literal equivalent, salle de bain.

Jean-Baptiste Fortuné de Fournier, Le Cabinet de toilette de l'Impératrice Eugénie à Saint-Cloud, 1860. Or when you realise that First Empire style is basically Donald Trump’s bathroom meeting Regency fashion.

   No, the toilette of eau de toilette is a more direct reference to the cosmetic aspects of a noble’s routine, as la toilette since the end of the 17th century has referred to the act of preparing oneself to appear in public. If the word literally translates as ‘small towel’, it’s only because the toilette, between the 14th and 16th centuries, had come to refer to the fine cloth that was laid on the table where one would set all utensils meant for personal adornment. By metonymy la toilette was then used to speak of these utensils, then the piece of furniture in question (the ‘dressing table’ in English), then, abstractly, the various acts by which nobles readied themselves to appear in public. A number of paintings have portrayed ladies ‘at their toilet’.

The eau de toilette as it’s known today appeared in the early 1900s, thanks to the ‘flappers’, fashion icons of the Roaring Twenties who sought perfumes they could wear easily all day long. Technically, an eau de toilette is lighten than an eau de parfum, which is lighter than the most concentrated extrait de parfum, which used to be the only concentration available, prepared on demand for a wealthy clientèle; in more ways than one, the eau de toilette started perfume’s democratisation as perfumers began selling their products in different concentrations; for example, Chanel commercialised the already-revolutionary N ͦ  5 (created in 1921) as an eau de toilette as soon as 1924. Of course, a lesser concentration meant that the resulting product was cheaper, sometimes considerably.

Perfume extracts contain 20–40% essences diluted in almost pure alcohol (90° at least), meaning that only a dab suffices to perfume someone for most of the day. If the product contains rare essences (which is to say, when raw materials were scarce or if the extraction process was particularly delicate), a dozen millilitres may cost ten times the eau de toilette’s price! Jean Patou’s Joy, first released in 1930 to exorcise the 1929 crisis that deprived the famous French couturier of most of his American clientèle, was advertised as ‘the costliest perfume in the world’—a slogan created by American columnist Elsa Maxwell, a good friend of Jean Patou (and incidentally a pioneer of the treasure-hunt party game, for those interested). A bottle of only 30ml of perfume extract required 10,600 jasmine flowers and over 300 roses, and these only were the main ingredients! Current price of the extract: €1,000 ($1,121)... In passing, the two top consumers of natural jasmine today are houses Chanel and Patou, which both have their own private jasmine fields in Grasse.

Traditionally, perfume is described following three stages in the perception of particular ‘notes’, that is to say, the most discernible odours which tend to be more easily scented right after spraying, or on the contrary ones that can be smelled on the skin long after the others have evaporated: the ‘head notes’ (notes de tête) or ‘top notes’; the ‘heart notes’ (notes de cœur) or ‘middle notes’; and the ‘base notes’ (in French the notes de fond, ‘bottom notes’. The unfortunate yet I suppose unavoidable comparisons with a certain portion of human anatomy may well have decided that English-speaking perfumers should stick to a plainer term). Certain molecules are extremely volatile and can only be perceived for a few minutes after spraying, others are rather more tenacious and serve as a structure for the whole assembly. In a typical extract, top notes will make for 20% of the perfume, middle notes around 30%, and base notes, 50% of it.

On the other hand, the normal composition of an eau de toilette today will be around 50% top notes that evaporate almost immediately, 30% middle notes that last for about fifteen minutes, and 20% base notes that won’t last the whole day. This can also be explained by the fact that an eau de toilette only contains 10% maximum of concentrated perfume, diluted in a 50°–60° alcohol solution. Closer to the extract is the eau de parfum, which contains 7–14% perfume, dissolved in 90° alcohol (almost as much alcohol as in the extract). Head notes make for 40% of the fragrance, the heart is 30% and at the bottom, 30% as well. The beginning is usually intense but the scent will still fade quicker than in an extract... Nevertheless, still more affordable than any extract.

By the way, the real reason why we have eau de parfum in the first place isn’t so much the need for a middle ground between extracts and the lighter eaux as... the delicate matter of French taxes on luxury goods, which passed the 33% threshold in the late 1970s. To circumvent it, in 1978, Cacharel released its new perfume Anaïs Anaïs in two distinct concentrations, the regular eau de toilette and the novel eau de parfum version. An interesting side effect of it was that with this new concentration, the fragrances weren’t quite identical, either. For example, the eau de parfum version of N ͦ  5 which Jacques Polge created in 1986 was made following the traditional recipe of the extract, except the accrued sweetness of the vanilla noticeably emphasised the vivid citrusy head. Some women got into the habit to buy both versions of a perfume, reserving the more concentrated one to the evening or special occasions, for instance. Although, quite frankly, in the 1980s, the eaux de toilette were many things, but ‘office-friendly’, they were not. (Will elaborate, one of these days.)

Alembics and a bed of roses at the Fragonard factory. House Fragonard, founded in 1926, is one of the oldest perfumeries in Grasse, the oldest being Molinard (est. 1849, which makes it one of the oldest in the world).

   I’m sure @thatiswhy will be thrilled to learn (or be reminded of the fact) that the mother of all alcohol-based perfumes is known as ‘Queen of Hungary’s water’, l’eau de la reine de Hongrie, maybe created in 1370 as a consequence of the European discovery of ethyl alcohol, or to be more accurate, the invention of the double distillation technique allowing one to separate in the alembic the ethanol from the foul-tasting esters. Before that, distillers added to their spirits such strong spices as anise or juniper berries, for instance, which covered the bad taste. In passing, the process of boiling a distillate several times is called cohobation, borrowed from alchemical lexicon (the etymology of Medieval Latin cohobare, as often is the case in this domain, is Arabic: كُهْبة, cohba, ‘brownish’, referring to the darker tint of the distilled liquid).

It is entirely possible that the initial recipe was based on an old formula for a rosemary tincture: the flowers were macerated in alcohol, but there was no distillation. This recipe was notably recommended by famous physician (and religious reformer) Arnaldus de Villa-Nova (c.1240–1311), who taught for many years at the prestigious Montpellier School of Medicine, before moving to Paris. He is, incidentally, credited with translating a number of medical texts from Arabic. He wasn’t the inventor of alcoholic maceration, of course, but his writings are an excellent illustration of what learned people thought to be good for the health at the time. Most often, there was little distinction made between substances that smelled good and remedies, and even in the 18th century perfume could still sell as an in-and-out panacea. The term elixir (borrowed from Arabic as well though the etymology is Greek), initially referring to a medicinal powder, was used in alchemy to speak either of the philosopher’s stone or a substance liable to cure all ills. Eventually, elixir came to refer to any alcoholic maceration of herbs, spices or fruits later distilled, to be employed as a medicine.

Historians have passionately debated which Hungarian queen exactly this miraculous ‘water’ was made for. It may have been Elizabeth of Poland (1305–1380), wife of Charles I Robert of Hungary. A popular legend had it that Queen Elizabeth obtained it from an angel and that it was so efficacious that she received a marriage proposal from the king of Poland at age 72—but historians have suggested that the confusion might stem from the fact that Elizabeth was named regent queen of Poland by her son in 1370...

Yes, alright, the legend might have been made up by perfumers who made an augmented recipe into a speciality of Montpellier during the 17th century; indeed, the first mention of it is found in 1660 savant books, at a time when the eau de Hongrie has become a favourite at Louis XIV’s court in Versailles. By that time, the old rosemary elixir was a more complex preparation, including marjoram, sage, lemon balm and cedrus. No matter the recipe, though, the use was unchanged: it was meant to be consumed or rubbed all over one’s skin, and expecting to heal migraines, various feminine vapours, rheumatisms, tinnitus, gout, palpitations, jaundice... (list far from exhaustive) up to the plague itself! Not to mention, of course, its many cosmetic advantages.

Note that such prestigious reputation isn’t completely unwarranted: ethanol is known today as ‘rubbing alcohol’ and ‘surgical alcohol’ for a good reason. Even though it is ineffective against bacterial spores, ethyl alcohol works well as an antiseptic against most fungi and bacteria, as well as a lot of viruses, killing organisms by denaturing their proteins and dissolving their lipids. This is a reason why spirits are known in several languages as ‘waters of life’: compare French eau de vie with Irish uisce beatha, for instance. In passing, alchemists were only trying to discover the recipe for an elixir of youth, you know.

   Actually, the closest the perfume world can get to the infamous ‘Kit Marlowe really was Shakespeare’s plays unless it was all De Vere’ cross-century quarrel may well be the neverending bickering between the respective heirs of the Feminis and Farina families, since we may never know who invented the eau de Cologne, only that it became a huge sensation without ever needing to hire a very bored-looking, starving, overpaid actress to pout next to a bottle of it for it to become the talk of several countries, and a bit of a misnomer.

Versions diverge and (oddly credible) documents abund, but here is the most diplomatic variant of the story: one Giovanni Paolo Feminis, born in 1666 in northern Piedmont, emigrated to Germany where he opened a distillery in Cologne in 1693, in which he sold diverse scented waters, including a special aqua mirabilis (‘marvellous water’) made from rosemary, melissa, bergamot, orange blossom, lemon and citron essences in spirit. The true origins of this formula are unknown, but it’s hard not to think of the Florentine basilica of Santa Maria Novella, where the Dominican monks opened a perfumery in 1612 (which still exists today, making it the oldest perfumery in the Western world) in addition to the mediaeval apothecary office where sold essences, elixirs, balms... This pharmacy was already active in the 1300s, when historians found traces of rose water being sold by the friars to help repel the plague. Dante Alighieri (1265–1321) was a frequent customer of the time.

The convent's most prized product was probably created to honour Catherine de’ Medici when she left for France in 1533 to be married to the future King Henry II (she would be Queen of France from 1547 till she was widowed in 1559, after which she ruled France as a regent for her second son Charles IX, officially and officiously. She was an impressive bitch, Kate was) and took with her an Acqua della Regina in which citrus essences predominated, bergamot in particular. This is, indeed, very reminiscent of the ‘marvellous water’ which the Feminis distillery sold in Cologne in the late 1600s as a digestive and hepatic remedy, an antiseptic and a painkiller. Business was successful and Feminis was even named an honorary member of the Cologne Chamber of Commerce. Nevertheless, the perfumer died heirless in 1736.

In 1709, Piedmont-born Giovanni Maria Farina (he came from a village which his family co-founded near Feminis’ hometown of Crana) came to Cologne, where his brother Giovanni Battista traded luxury goods; Giovanni Maria was meant to lead a subsidary of their export company dealing toiletries imported from Italia: soap, perfume, face powder, and also wigs, lace, silk stockings, tobacco boxes... In that time, Cologne had the enviable status of a ‘free and imperial city’, which is to say it was subordinate only to the Holy Roman Emperor, as opposed to territorial cities which had to answer to territorial lords. What that meant for commerce was that by the time the Farina family established themselves in Cologne, Catholic foreigners trading in luxury goods—which meant gold, silver, silk and perfume—were welcomed with open arms. The privilege was abolished under French occupation (1794–1814), meaning that anyone could settle; one of the direct consequences of this was a significant rise in eau de Cologne forgery!

The famous ‘John Maria Farina opposite Jülich's Square ltd.’ perfumery (one of the oldest active perfumeries, too) notably sold an Aqua admirabilis whose invigorating freshness contrasted with heavier classical perfumes. A hydrolat (a result of steam distillation alongside essential oil, ‘flower waters’ are less concentrated than the latter and ideal for use as a lotion) added with brandy (eau de vie), Farina’s ‘admirable water’ contained rosemary, thyme, absinth, marjoram, melissa, lavender, angelica, hyssop, fennel, juniper berries, anise seeds, nutmeg, clove, caraway, nutmeg, clove, as well as lemon peel and bergamot oil... In spite of the impressive list of aromatic herbs, the Admirable Water is led by a sweet yet fresh citrusy scent. ‘I have created a perfume which is reminiscent of a spring morning following a soft shower where fragrances of wild narcissi combine with that of sweet orange flowers. This perfume refreshes me and stimulates both my senses and imagination’, Giovanni Maria wrote to his brother back in 1708.

By the time the Faculty of Medicine of Cologne officially recognised the great healing property of that perfume in 1727, Aqua admirabilis was renowned across Europe as Eau de Cologne, adored in every royal or imperial court. The first delivery to Paris was made in 1721 but the perfume became very largely diffused in France during the 1733–1735 War of the Polish Succession (between the Habsburgs and the Bourbons, and France was heavily involved because contender Stanislas I, disgraced former king of Poland, happened to be King Louis XV of France’s father-in-law...), thanks to French officers.

Under the reign of Napoleon I, when Cologne’s privileges were abolished, suddenly there were Eau de Cologne counterfeiting everywhere in town—it bears reminding that there was no such thing, at the time, as intellectual property... In the space of a few decades, nearly 2,000 forgeries were sold! Emphasis was put on the supposed medicinal virtues of the perfume, in an attempt to distance the concurrence. However, that did little to damage the success of the original preparation. In 1806, a grand-grand-nephew of the creator, Giovanni Maria Giuseppe Farina (also born, in 1785, in the family town of Santa Maria Maggiore) founded a perfume shop in Paris, rue Saint-Honoré, as ‘Jean-Marie Farina’. Quite interestingly, in an early brochure he claimed to be the great-grandson of Giovanni Paolo Feminis; which was, in all likelihood, meant to shut down rumours that the rights to the original Eau de Cologne should go to Feminis’ legal benefactors. True or not, Jean-Marie—who was one of Honoré de Balzac’s sources of inspiration for his character of César Birotteau—obtained in 1806 a contract to make and sell an ‘Eau dite de Cologne’, a ‘so-called Cologne water’, which was met with immediate success. Two years later, he had become Imperatrice Eugénie’s official perfumer, and he famously made for Napoleon I the ‘Emperor’s roll’, a special bottle that he could slip in his boot.

‘Cologne water is usually employed pure, or mixed with water or wine, depending on the circumstances. Its quantity must vary as well, for internal use a few drops with sugar or water, a teaspoon. For external use, doses are more considerable. It is used in liniments, frictions, unguents, localised or general baths, enemas and injections. For bathing the whole body, one may pour up to three bottles. In a foot bath, one should suffice. In an enema, in injection, one or two spoonfuls.’

— from a 1825 brochure...

In 1851, the authentic Eau de Cologne is sold in these small, slim bottles containing about one seventh of a litre, sealed with a cork and wrapped in printed paper with Jean-Marie Farina’s signature as well as an embossed stamp and a green wax mark bearing the arms of Prussia both on the box and on the bottle. Each bottle sold for one franc and 50 centimes, which mightn’t sound so impressive till you realise that at the time that was worth an entire year of a civil servant’s salary!

House Farina in Cologne still sells the original preparation as Original Eau de Cologne, but prestigious Parisian perfumery Roger & Gallet acquired the rights to the rue Saint-Honoré house in 1862 (which is how they became Roger & Gallet in the first place. They quickly made a name for themselves selling luxury soaps and quality scented waters), and they still sell an Eau de Cologne extra vieille. After winning a lawsuit over the right to use the name Farina in the first place, of course.

If the price is considerably less steep than what it used to be, one should also consider the fact that nowadays, eau de Cologne is a commercial appellation used to refer to an even lighter concentration of perfume than in an eau de toilette, 4–6% essences only. It is intended to be used as a lotion, a tonic for the morning, which may be a refreshing version of a perfume and worn at the same time as the latter. The citrus extracts do possess astringent, circulatory properties, not to mention their fresh, tart smell. The Extra-Vieille was advertised by Roger & Gallet in the 1960s as ‘a good friction for a good day!’ Glamourous. By that time, cologne had lost its aura of luxury. For decades it remained extremely old-fashioned, and not in the ‘retro chic’ sense... Then, in the early 2000s, fashion shifted and people began looking for ‘authenticity’, for natural smells, as well as simpler perfumes. Which, as always, is relative, since perfume overall is a luxury product and cologne by Guerlain (Eau de Cologne impériale, Eau de Cologne du Coq) for instance won’t be that ‘democratic’ an issue.

Still, my personal favourite shall remain Institut Très Bien’s Cologne à la russe, because I am weak. Also snobbish. And the perfume version, Très Russe, is one of my ultimate favourite scents of all time and space.

[mercerislandbooks]

Pride Month Picks

If you don’t already know, June is LGBTQ+ Pride Month, which means it’s time to celebrate and support our community. Businesses across the Puget Sound area are flying rainbow flags, and Island Books is not missing out! To mark the month, we are going to giveaway two awesome rainbow Lokai bracelets (read to the bottom for more details).

It is also an excuse to call attention to queer books, an overarching category for any book that features a LGBTQ+ main character, focuses on queer issues, or is written by a queer author. This is one of my favorite genres because literature about queer people normalizes their existence, in the same way it does with racial or religious minorities.

I have to admit that I told Lillian, our children’s buyer, last summer that I had one rule when I read queer books: No one can die.

This may sound like a silly requirement, but until recently, I felt like all of the books about LGBTQ+ characters were depressing. While trying to portray real world examples of these characters’ situations, the books I saw also squashed hope for a better future. The only queer book I knew about in high school was Blue is the Warmest Color, and it is not the happiest. It seems that queerness in literature equaled heartbreak, and that wasn’t the world I wanted to exist in. (I probably should have gone to a bookstore and asked a salesperson, but I was introverted fifteen year old who wasn’t quite confident enough in her own identity.)

I pulled as many books as I could think of from the teen section that featured queer characters!

I have been so excited over the past year or so to rediscover queer literature, especially for young adults. One of my favorite books of the past year has been Hot Dog Girl by Jennifer Dugan, an adorable book about two best friends mourning the closure of the town theme park, and consequently their childhood. Through their hijinks to save the park, the girls realize that the most important thing they have is their relationship and that they’ve fallen in love. And it’s so sweet! Over the past almost-decade since my rejection of queer books, authors have made a point to write books that show positive role models for queer relationships, highlighting complexity, intersectionality, and humor in fantastic ways.

Consequently, there are now stories about queer characters in almost every genre now, from picture books to literary adult fiction. As there are too many books to showcase in this blog post alone, I’ll start with some of favorite summer reads, which all happen to feature gay relationships.

Camille Perri’s When Katie Met Cassidy is a spin on romantic comedy. Katie is a Kentucky born blond-haired blue-eyed sweetheart working at a law firm in New York City. Raised with traditional family values, she is put into a tailspin when she can’t stop thinking about Cassidy, an androgynously masculine woman working for an opposing firm. On the other side, Cassidy is dealing with her own personal crisis, passing thirty and feeling like she is aging out of her party lifestyle. To top off her woes, Cassidy can’t stop thinking about Katie, the straight girl who is not so straight, either. I loved this hilarious romance because gracefully deals with identity politics and the complications of being true to one’s instincts. Camille Perri focuses on queer communities and the power of female relationships.

Two books I loved featuring kitten paws.

Red, White, and Royal Blue is one of my must-reads this summer. It has received a huge amount of hype; I read the book in the day and the hype is accurate. The book poses the question, What if the hypothetical First Son of America and the hypothetical Prince of Wales hated each other? What if they had to spend PR time together for political peace and then fell in love? What if?? While the plot may sound silly, I adore the book because Casey McQuiston does a fantastic job of balancing the levity of first love with real-world consequences of such a political “scandal.” As a bonus, I enjoyed how vivid and realistic the characters are.

On the literary side, there are so many beautifully written books about queer experiences that I cannot even begin to cover them all. I will talk about two, On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous by Ocean Vuong and Lie With Me by Philippe Besson, translated by Molly Ringwald. All books about queer people deal with ideas of self-identity, especially when the characters are discovering their sexualities. These two books both follow men in their experiences with first love and heartbreak. In On Earth We’re Briefly Gorgeous, the main character Little Dog writes a letter to his illiterate mother about his childhood and experiences growing up the child of a Vietnamese immigrant. The poetry of Ocean Vuong’s previous work bleeds seamlessly into this sometimes stream-of-consciousness narrative. One of my favorite things about the novel is how Little Dog’s sexual identity is not the main focus of his story but simply an aspect. The intersectionalism of Vuong’s work is definitely one of its many strengths. I definitely broke my rule about death with this one, but the sadness is integral to the story line.

Lie With Me is heartbreaking. There is no way for me to get around it, but the simplicity and restrained manner of the French translation is addicting. The book starts with the narrator seeing a teenager in a hotel lobby that looks identical to his first love. This vision sends him into a spiral of memories, jumping back and forth in time and space. Because of its a reminiscence, the AIDS epidemic tints his youth in grief. The reader also learns that the title has a double-meaning, referring to both the intimacy of the teenagers and the social perjury they have to commit. I loved the uncomplicated language and the fundamental and overwhelming emotions that fill the story. Clearly, there is a reason it sold over 120,000 copies in France.

Though there are many more queer books that I could have reviewed, these are some of my favorites of the year so far. Each of them delved deeper into the emotional milieu of queer identification than expected or spoke to me in a personal way.

We have two bracelets up for grabs! Photo courtesy of Lokai.com

Please come into the store if you would like to get more recommendations or just simply chat! We would all be delighted to help you. If you would like to win one of these super fun Lokai bracelets, post a picture on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram of your favorite queer read and tag us! We will be taking submissions until the 20th of June.

Happy Pride!

— Kelleen

[rockofeye]

It'd be nice to see sort of a "Creole for beginners" post that talks about what terms are common in Vodou and maybe explains the grammar structure. I've noticed a lot of Creole I can mentally translate myself if I think about it long enough since many French words were taken into English awhile back, but French itself I don't actually know so sometimes it's quite a reach. The evolution of the language seems parallel with the evolution of Vodou and that's really interesting to me.

So, this ask has been sitting for awhile, and I’ve been thinking about it a lot as I am just finishing up an intensive month-long Kreyòl class.

Haitian Kreyòl/Kreyòl Ayisyen is a fascinating, gorgeous, succulent language. In some ways, it is super straightforward and in other ways, it is deeply complex as befits a language that has roots in Romance languages (more than one!), African languages (more than one!), and Indigenous languages. Like vodou, it is a language that embodies the history of Haiti and it has and does evolve as culture and the world advances.

Outside of Haiti, there is the idea that there is no common orthography/common way of speaking and utilizing the language. This is wrong wrong wrong. Largely, this stems from the fact that, until about 50 years ago, Kreyòl was almost entirely an oral only language because of colonialism–Kreyòl has only begun being taught in schools in the last decade, yet almost every Haitian speaks it fluently (the elite class speaks French, but that is largely a class marker–everyone knows Kreyòl). Many Haitians do not know how to write in Kreyòl, and write the best that they are able which leads to widely varied output….which leads outsiders to say that there is no commonly accepted orthography.

It would take a long, LONG time to really deconstruct and explain how Kreyòl works in practice so I’m not going to go there entirely, but here are some basics:

Kreyòl has 32 letter/symbols in its alphabet. Within that, there are 15 vowels/vowel sounds and 18 consonants/consonant sounds. Kreyòl only utilizes one accent (grave accent/aksan grav). Things with the alphabet that trip up Kreyòl learners who are native English speakers include:

‘C’ is not utilized except as a compound sound in ‘ch’, which is a soft sound like ‘shh’ and not a hard sound like ‘chair’.

‘U’ is not utilized except in compound sounds with other vowels.

‘G’ is always hard, never soft.

In Kreyòl, everything written is spoken–there are no silent letters, ever. A professor of mine terms Kreyòl as a truly democratic language; every letter has a sound that is expressed orally. 

Basic sentence structure is Subject-Verb-Object (Li se yon bèl fi/She is a beautiful woman) and Noun-Adjective (Li bèl/She is beautiful). Within that structure:

Tenses and conditions (positive/negation) are assigned by separate verb markers/particles. Absense of a verb marker makes the tense automatically present.

Verbs largely do not conjugate, with some exceptions.

Articles are placed separately from the noun–definite articles are ALWAYS after the noun, indefinite articles are ALWAYS before the noun, and this gives speakers of other languages fits because it is different than the Romance languages most closely related to Kreyòl (my class had several folks who spoke several European-derived languages fluently, and the folks who spoke French or Spanish fluently struggled the most).

Adjectives are mostly after nouns, except when they are not.

Kreyòl is a language of double speak, both in general and in vodou. Words carry multiple meanings depending on context and tone, which can be a struggle when learning and can lead to confusion and sometimes awkward conversation. For example, the word for walk and market is spelled and pronounced the same way, the word for pen can also refer to internal genitalia and/or pubic hair in a female-assigned person in a somewhat rude/abrupt way, and utilizing a nasal versus open vowel sound in ‘I would like to meet you’ in Kreyòl changes that sentence to ‘I would like to fuck you’. Luckily, most Haitians are extremely accommodating to outsiders and understand that mistakes are honest mistakes (but they will laugh…).

Tone and composure (how you fix your face when you speak) is super important. How a sentence is said communicates as much, if not more, than the actual word. How I say ‘yon fanm sa a la’ can change ‘the woman over there’ to ‘can you believe this biiiiiiiitch over there’.

Kreyòl must be spoken with mouth open: no mumbling, etc. To get words across accurately, the mouth must open to make all the sounds.

The language is an independent standalone language with piece of French, Spanish, English, and multiple African languages visible. Much of the sentence structuring is African-derived, particularly from Bantu and Yoruba sources. There is a recent and evolving movement to claim identity of the language as Haitian only, not as Kreyòl.

The language also reflects the lived history of the country and it’s people. A lot of common phraseology reflects the history of enslavement; one of the more common ways to ask where someone lives in-country is ki bò ou ye/kibò ou ye, which translates to ‘what side are you from’. This is directly related to how enslaved Africans lived; plantations were huge and sprawling and so when enslaved Africans met others who were on the same plantation, how they related where they lived on the plantation was in that manner. Like vodou, the language is it’s own living history.

In the religion, language gets more complicated. French is utilized in some specific instances and some spirits, if/when they speak, only speak French, but Kreyòl is the liturgical language of the religion. All the songs and majority of the prayers are in Kreyòl, the community speaks Kreyòl, etc. In general, French is falling away as being a conversational language in Haiti–it is often used in business and medicine, but that’s about it.

There is also langaj, the language of the spirits. This is largely untranslatable language that spirits sometimes use in possession–it can be a combination of Kreyòl and African-descended sounds that are not complete in any African language. What langaj means is often private between the spirit and to whom that spirit is speaking, with the most common uses become accepted parlance (think ritual exclamations, like ‘ayibobo’, ‘awoche Nago’, ‘alaso’,  ‘djarvodo/djavodo/djavado’).

Kreyòl is also spoken differently by spirits than by people. Kreyòl in general has many dialects throughout the country, and it follows that the spirits have many dialects as well. Kreyòl in general is spoken very fast by Haitians, and the spirits follow suit with that. In addition, some spirits speak more rural or localized forms of Kreyòl depending on what part of Haiti they are from. Some spirits speak very nasally, some speak so softly it almost sounds like they are only letting out soft breaths, some mix Kreyòl and langaj, some only speak/yell at top volume. All of that is super different than what a language program or even an in-person class can teach, and soKreyòl learned and used in religious settings is picked up contextually. 

LearningKreyòl can be a daunting pursuit. Since it is SO orally focused, the best way is to learn orally in an immersive setting; either an intensive class or in Haiti or the Haitian community. There are some language programs, most of them are not great. Here’s what I like:

Ann Pale Kreyol by Albert Valdman is an excellent place to start. Though it is older and some of it is dated, it is still pretty foundational and his teaching methods are still used in classroom teaching. It is pricey for a used copy, but there are PDFs easily available online.

Valdman also produced a bilingual English-Haitian Kreyòl dictionary and it is FANTASTIC. I have several dictionaries and this is by far the best–you get definitions of words, what parts of speech they are, and how they are used both in English and in Kreyòl sentences. It is pricey and you could beat someone to death with it, but it is worth it for learning.

Pawol Lakay is as useful as Ann Pale Kreyol is, and it also comes with CDs (if you can threaten Amazon into making sure they send them with the book). It can be a little weak on sentence structure and what parts of speech are, but it’s good. There is a forthcoming language learning system for Kreyòl that beats the pants off of anything else on the market but it is not out yet.

MangoLanguages is good for basic hello/goodbye/my name is fluency, but I did not find it useful for conversational use. Good introduction, though, and the pronunciation in-program is pretty on-point. Most public library systems and college/university libraries have a free subscriptions for this, there are also pay options.

There are other books that are aimed at travelers and casual users which can be useful, but the above are the best resources I have seen so far. I do not like the Pimsleur system for Kreyòl at all, as it is super limited to essentially picking up women in Port-au-Prince which is great if that’s your jam but not useful for much of anything else. Youtube is full of Kreyòl movies and television and music, which is good to throw on in the background to absorb the sound and cadence of the language. Several professors have cautioned about listening to Haitian radio unless it originates in Haiti, saying that most Haitian radio originating in the US is a broadcast in a mix of Kreyòl and bad French, which can trip up a learner.

I hope this helps! Let me know if I can offer more info.