#which doesnt really sound like a lot
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Love that with the way its set up, Snotlout is anwhere from barely 3 to almost 5 years older than Hiccup
#which doesnt really sound like a lot#but it is the difference between like#a barely 16 teen picking on 13 still a teen year old#and an 18 legally an adult picking on 13 barely even a teen#or like a 20 definitely an Adult picking on a 15 that a 10th grader#personally i like pushing him towards being 5 years older#just because thats. kind of deeply pathetic#also other reasons i may eventually share#anyway#httyd books#httyd#book hiccup#how to train your dragon#how to train your dragon books#book snotlout
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something simple to try to get out of art block (it didn't work)
#alek art#ninjago#zane julien#2024#i am very unhappy with this and sooo in order to feel better i am going to talk about him#system zane is very real to me. i always give him six main alters (but i do believe there is more lol)#systems cannot just pick and choose who front depending on the day i am very aware (i am a system) its more on the nose symbolism#the fifth one crossed out is the ice emperor. in canon he exists in zane's mind as an “alter ego” of sorts which is crazy to me#character has canon dissociative episodes... amnesia... and several different “personalities” / identities? sounds familiar idk#i talked a lot about this hc on my long ass zane hc post thanks for the ask btw npderzane#its not an au its just how i see him so just imagine every zane i draw as system zane. ill only specify it in the tags if its system related#that one post thats like. 'being a did system sucks which one of us poured instant coffee in the bathtub!' thats the average zane experience#he wakes up and everyones like “mannn zane you were going crazyyy on prime empire yesterday” and hes like ??? i did not play any video games#and then he looks at the calender and 6 months have passed. semi true story that happened to me#also alters having incredibly different food preferences is funny. zane doesnt eat anything ever vs boone who eats raw meat sometimes#zane having really weird characterization? and its very inconsistent / bad writing uhhh alek explanation is hes a system and nobody can mask#man its 1 pm :|#i hate this drawing so much i dont even want to look at it but it took time so ill post it#i also have another zane drawing in my drafts i should post. from like 2 months ago???
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Anyone else not able to say 'bless you', either because it feels too personal, embarrassing, slightly erotic or a mixture of all of the above-
Buuuuuut also whenever an event interrupts the conversation, you feel so much more awkward not saying anything/commenting on it at all, and so you wish you could just... say that phrase, or have some other thing that makes sense to say to just- shrug it off???
#waterfalltalks#been thinking about this SO much lately like- thought about it before#but i grew up in a household where no one said it#and none of my friends ever say/said it so it was never really a problem#we all just pretty much ignore them THOUGH lately bc of one friend they've started#mocking... the noises/sounds.... which is a WHOLE ass experience both when it happens to me or when it happens to someone else#buuuuttt i digress- the point is more that lately its been a lot more on my mind bc#it keeps happening in the middle of a conversation/when we're watching videos#and it just.... feels so SILENT afterwards and i know no one else is thinking about it bc#no one else puts the pressure on it that i do (cept my one friend that knows but he doesnt usually mention it)#but like.... idk guys i just feel AWKWARD not SAYING ANYTHING but also i feel even WORSE saying something and is just so eguheugheuhjgshueg#idk just!!! thoughts!!! and seeing if im alone in this bc i know other people feel awkward blessing but#does anyone else feel that?? silence????? maybe im just crazy ToT#if you made it this far im sorry for the rambling and thank you for reading ittttt feel free to tell me what u think bc im out of my mind <#waterfallrambles
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heaven help her
#メズマライザー#重音テト#初音ミク#hatsune miku#kasane teto#mesmerizer#vocaloid#vocaloid fanart#my art#artists on tumblr#illustration#art#this song has me in a violent choke hold#i think if the animation wasnt as great as it is i wouldnt really care much for the song#cause this is like. the first time ive gone out of my way to listen to a vocaloid song#i didnt grow up with them. i knew miku and heard their songs#but itd be in like. speedpaints and stuff#i also listen to will stetson who covers some vocaloid songs but idk if that counts#anyway this doesnt look as good as i wanted#the plus side of getting a drawing done in a day/day and a half is that i cant get mad if it gets little attention#cause i didnt spend a lot of time on it anyway#also didnt draw their hats im aware#last time i tried drawing a characters hat it put me in such a bad mood i had to nap#and i dont want to take a nap or be in a bad mood#i have at least three more vocaloid things i want to draw#two of which are for rabbit hole#dooblenauts#i wish i sounded like teto#i know shes ai (with consent from the people that do her voice bank)#but she has an androgynous sounding voice i wish i had
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Love lifts us up where we belong, Where the eagles fly, on a mountain high! Love makes us act like we are fools, Throw our lives away for one happy day!
🎥: @starcuffedjeans
#moulin rouge! the musical#derek klena#oyoyo joi#i'll be honest i really liked their chemistry#he sounds like goofy sometimes which... kind of takes me out of it? but he's not the worst#who doesnt like goofy tho?#i liked a lot of his acting decisions#he adds a lot of 'crying' when he sings is what i've noticed and tbh not super into it but for the most part he isn't unbearable#look i know this gifset isn't gonna do well because people like kisses and i do too but sometimes touching is more intimate than a kiss...#oyoyo blew me away#and i love every acting choice of hers#zero complaints on oyoyo#the way there's almost the same shade of blue in every gif? amazing#christian the composer#satine#oyoyotine#moulinrougeedit#musicaltheatreedit#theatreedit#broadwayedit#christian x satine#i'm changing the gifs because i want it to be better quality#also i replaced satine resting her head on christian's shoulder because i put it in the gifset with dylan's christian... sorry#joitine
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his internalised homophobia flavoured cowardice etc etc but genuinely kind of obsessed with the way this is the only glimpse you really get into what yosuke has been mulling over in relation to kanji specifically over the course of like. months at this point.
#like. this in conjunction w the cut romance lines about focusing on the murders to avoid confronting himself...#idk. i just think a lot about the way theres really quite a lot of himself that yosuke doesn't show to other people#even to souji as this conversation demonstrates#and theres this interesting mix in him of self awareness and just. willful blindness at times#and snippets like this show both of those qualities imo#dwelling on something for months and months at this point and yet not being able actually articulate that in front of other people#out of like. what i see as pride and embaressment and every bit of conflict tangled up in what he recognises in kanji#and puts down in him (because recognising that u put people down to try make urself feel better doesnt automatically rid urself of that#behaviour or thought pattern or the anxieties which help underpin it)#like theres a degree of ambiguity as to what yosuke actually SAID sure but tbh what kanji summerises sounds more like a quote than like#how he would reframe something in his own words imo#anyways! forgive the yosukeposting <3#tunes talks persona#persona 4
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it seems people are already upset that tsumiki is not nice anymore, sorry you dont know her like i do
#cmon. cmon. she has every right to be violent#idk if i trust gege to allow her to be angry (which she also has every right to be?? her life has constantly been people pushing her away#and forgetting about her and her constantly being nice) but if she was nice even now it would literally make zero sense#thats not character development. its not even giving her character. its just megumi's perspective being right that shes some kind of saint#which is sooooooo boring like why would she be nice. i think she should be tired of being nice. i think she should go apeshit. as a treat#and there was so much build up about the curse put on her. making it just some thing like oh shes a sorcerer but shes not gonna do anything#about it because shes so good IS SO BORING#and really it would be unrealistic if she didnt harbor at least some negative feelings i mean megumi was always kind of an asshole right up#until she got cursed and im assuming gojo didnt pay much attention to her as he did megumi. and her mom left her for some shitty dude#why would she not be mad?? just getting stuck being a little angel after all that just makes my skin crawl#and if megumi only really considered apologizing after she got cursed i doubt he really did a lot for her when she wasnt.#so i absolutely think she should be allowed to kill people it would be a disservice if she wasnt and was just again boiled down to the#saintly girl older sister image megumi seems to have of her. so boring#or maybe its just me being an angry sister who has to be nice. but i dont really think it is#tsumiki fushiguro#jjk 211#jjk leaks#jjk spoilers#jjk#oh and before anyone misinterprets i know megumi had some psychology going on as a kid. doesnt mean tsumiki didnt either#or that she has to be so understanding all the time and not consider her own feelings. so boring. so shitty#it mightve sounded like a joking tone when i said she should go apeshit. but i was 100% serious#anyway yeah thats it#hanancouldyounot#hanancouldyoupost
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ugghhh wintertime sucks!! I'm sad and tired and sad all the time.. I need a nap.. and f/o cuddles.. and another nap..
#ash rambles 💚#negative#part of it is definitely the weather#it's so dark and dreary and i never wanna leave my bed#but also just. my mood akdjajs I'm kinda down in the dumps today#im recovering from being sick which always fucks me up#and i just cant shake this feeling of anxiety..? and i feel kinda a lot like my f/os wouldnt like me or would fall out of love or never see#me as more than a friend and other stuff like that#i.. actually got broken up with yesterday irl!#it wasnt messy. he said that this isnt what he wanted and it was fine and we're back to being pals. i wasnt sad at all in the moment and#i dont think i am now..? it's weird. we were laughing like always literal minutes after having the chat. when we got together we said that#if things domt work out we wanna keep being friends. and we're doing just that. honestly i saw it coming and idek if i LOVE him anymore#what even does love feel like..? regardless I'm not upset or sad at my breakup since i saw it coming and I'm honestly happy he just. Talked#to me about it. we communicated and then three minutes later went back to talking about x.enoblade LMAAOO it was fun!#but it is ridiculous for me to expect to feel NOTHING at no longer being in a relationship. i cant just feel nothing. i dont feel sad per s#just... in my thoughts i guess? I don't think the feeling of my f/os not liking me stems from me being dumped though. i think thats just me#being me sjdjaksj I'm very insecure a lot of the time. i dont think being dumped helpd very much though LMAAAOO#I'm doing okay i promise. and I'll be alright. theres just both a lot and nothing going on at the same time and i feel... idk what i feel.#i hope my f/os love me 😭 i hope that a lot#and honestly i know this community is ass and I'm more than happy in my own corner with my couple of followers but. ngl I've really felt as#though I'm not valued here and all that junk as of late. yeah just.. i think everything is happening at the same time and I'm tired and#i feel like I'm a confused kiddo who doesnt know anything anymore BAHAHAHA#holy shit it just sounds like i need a shower and a nap huh- I'll be alright I'm just. dealing with stuff akdjsks but i also hate to always#bring the mood down like this! i always try my best to be haha silly and all that shit. I'm just gonna try to daydream about f/o cuddles#(and try to convince myself they dont hate me ofc)#oh and. i know i mentioned this but. i hate the weather. so much. I'm sad all the time. November is actually my least favorite month too 😭#I've gotta study a lot today and I'll try to sneak in some k.urohyou and hopefully start watching monster too but yeah i apolgize if#I'm acting off these days ajdjajs I'm very stuck in my own mind these days. not exactly the most fun place to be 😭#delete later#i mean akdjajs i literally started crying the other day because my friend said that my husband (k.yohei) loves me ajdkahdb come on ash..
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"philosophy is pretentious" love? my best friend love is pretentious? platos symposium opens to talk about love amd hes one of the big three socratic philosophers. what is love by haddaway is pretentious? baby dont hurt me, dont hurt me no more?
#a lot of post western enlightenment philosophy reads as pretentious - and im sure a lot of it is#but consider: theres a lot more than ppst western enlightenment philosophy.#the symposiums a beloved one but theres also like. buddhism is a philosophical school. marxism.#i dont know why im so weirded out by the dismissal of philosophy as a topic of intrigue. perhaps because its just so broad and touches#a lot of things. the 'i do science' of rational inquiry. or maybe it was because i came out about a singular interest i like to read about#which then just got horribly trash talked. like sorry you had poor experiences previously but recently ive been readong about friendship#and love. lots of gilgamesh+enkidu and jonathan+david and achilles+patroclus#like sorry im mildly horrified by the concept of watching true crime? or going to bars and concerts? and thats all one person i know does#aside from jobs#oh aside from complaining every day about? sleeping alone? which really doesnt help you sound like you want anything other than a bedwarmer#im hoping that was a mostly flippant remark#meanwhile hes both leaving the house and interacting with people in person whereas im living in a house full of people i kind of hate#anyway. anyway. is it rude to call someone an acqaintance? collegue? a few layers further out of the friendship onion
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i've seen some people talk about einar's romance dialogue and how it feels offputting and rude to him but i'm gonna be honest,,, i never really saw it that way?
like i do agree that the player's dialogue options Suck compared to the other romances. something about it just feels really childish and definitely not as,,, "serious" or even committed as the other romance dialogue options. that being said, it never felt patronizing toward him.
to me, it feels like the player is just. being human. while einar is being galdur. the player doesn't get mad at him for not understanding certain jokes or not showing affection in the same way. and einar doesn't get uncomfortable with the player being human, making human jokes, or showing human affection. they're just Being Human and sharing their humanness with einar. which einar, while not always understanding of it, is completely used to and Does understand and enjoy it later on in the 3-4 levels. not that he didn't enjoy it before, but once you get closer to him, he Does understand more of the jokes and even joins in on certain ones (like the catch one!).
idk man it just always felt like the player and einar are just sharing their perspectives, personalities, and culture with each other. and of course there is the chocolate thing where he says he doesn't need it and the player has to learn what he actually wants from the relationship (ie spending time together). and there are still jokes that he ends up taking seriously, which yknow, that's kind of what i meant when i said the player's options often feel very childish compared to other ones. but it just never came off as patronizing to me, especially since einar repeatedly says that he enjoys spending time with the player and engaging in their "togetherness".
like to me it always felt like he enjoys learning about new things, even if he doesn't want to participate. like at the maji market when he says that while he doesn't understand the hotpot game, watching it fills him with "oneness". he enjoys learning about human and majiri culture and seeing them just be themselves! none of his dialogue implies that he's uncomfortable with the way the player shows affection (there Is something to be said about the dialogue options only ever showing one form of it,,, but tbf they can't put in 50+ options to cover the minutia of human brains lol)
idk i want to be clear im not shitting on anyone else's opinion on this!!! there's room for all perspectives here. i just wanted to share! i've seen SO many people say that romancing einar feels patronizing and like. i've just never seen it that way ! and it always confuses me when i see it akjhgd tbf i think some people are also neurodivergent (same lol) and don't appreciate the dialogue options that einar doesn't understand because in real life it Does feel patronizing when someone does it on purpose even knowing you won't get it. but for me, einar being galdur and not a neurodivergent human/majiri is an important distinction. he shows multiple times that he enjoys learning about human cultures and perspectives, that he enjoys talking to the player even when they don't understand each other, and that he's capable of understanding the player's jokes and sarcasm once explained to him. he Likes that they're different !
einar seems to enjoy the player acting "human" with him because he gets to learn about them! and he wouldn't want them stifle their true personality just to please him! einar is alllll about being true to yourself, your beliefs, your oneness, etc. he wants the player to understand him and his affection, but he also wants to understand the player's personality and affection. he wants them to share each other's "quirks". and don't get me wrong, i do wish there was more we could do to share in his way of affection (especially if his way is our way,,, like i'm Not flirty or jokey like that irl at all and i'd love to have more options where it really is just "hi i enjoy parallel playing with you :)))" lol) and that the dialogue options were less jokey or at least more affectionate/serious but idk,,, i think for me, i've just always seen einar as someone who wants to know and appreciate everything about the player, even the things he doesn't Immediately understand. he wants the player to explain things and share their culture with him SO bad
#long post#(sorry)#i just have so many thoughts!!#its so interesting to see how people feel about the npcs#like ive also seen Multiple people say that tish feels really naive and kind of rude but ive never seen her that way#she's not naive she's just upbeat and not involved in the cartel lol#like reth Intentionally hides it from her so she doesnt feel bad - that doesnt mean she doesnt understand how the world works yknow?#but thats a dif convo#or like how some people think kenli is very goofy silly and i find him really annoying akjgdh#i DO agree that the player dialogue options Often suck ass and there are so many times where just. none of them are good#and i would love it if they revamped the romance dialogue options with einar because.. So fucking childish i hate it#but idk they just never felt patronizing to me#it always felt like the player was just being human and not going out of their way to be like a galdur#which from everything we know einar's personality and background - i personally think he appreciates that a lot#because it means he gets to learn more about humans which is basically one of his onenesses#i agree that his romance is def not traditional and honestly feels more... aroace + demi? ish?#and honestly sometimes it feels like the devs intentionally made His romance dialogue somewhat vague and not like#the majiri npcs. like there's a noticeable difference in how he talks and shows affection and its not Just his personality#but again dif convo that's not the point ajkhg#idk i feel like for this it really depends on the intention and how the other person feels#the players intention is never to be patronizing and einar himself doesnt feel like it is#so like. PERSONALLY i just never saw it that way#sorry - im saying personally and 'to me' a lot cause i dont want this to come off as like rude or vaguey#i just didnt want to add in on anyone's conversation with a big wall of text essentially going 'i disagree' aljdhg#like again !! i respect everyone's opinion on this !!!#but i wanted to share! cause ive seen sooo many people say this! but i also know it can suck to have some rando on your post going 'nah'#aljdhg#einar#i Really want to hear more opinions on this like what do you guys think !! does the player dialogue sound mean to you?#or like patronizing? uncomfortable? misleading? etc??
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I AGREE its so crazy how zap gags weren't a thing.... like TTCC really popped off with that one! i understand TTR is moreso sticking closer to the way TTO was but WOW zap just feels so natural with a REALLY good mechanic that uses strategy in using squirt and its just so good.... also my favorite track
YEEEPP!! That's how I feel about it. Squirt and zap just mix well together. I also think the addition of an 8th gag track was also a good move, allowing for a nice rotation of combinations (like how lure-trap and throw-drop are together as a combo). And also its a nice even number. I also think it helps utilize squirt, idk just feels good to do in general. Of course, I don't really have anything to compare this to and it's just me speaking as a player of (currently) one server, so take what I say with a grain of salt.
It's my favorite too, zap warriors UNITE!!
#clemask#clemramble#this is also not me hating on tt r either#actually i probably dont have to space that out because this is going to appear in word search anyways but still#i know sometimes there's a little bit of competition (is that what youd call it)? between the two servers. i want it to be stated that#i do not care about server comp. play what you want. who cares. i think both servers have their pros and cons and finding value in what YOU#like is more important than which one is the “”best“”. I think TR does an amazing job of taking TTO and transforming it into something more#while also staying true to the original game. i love the fact it brings some of the old concepts that were originally scrapped or lost#i also like the toon events that they have. like there was the halloween one and if i believe correctly it had a parade in it?#SUPPPERR COOL. i shouldve atleast played a little during that time just to experience it. but to be fair during the school year my#playing in general is toned down a lot. im sure everyone reading this knows how it is#and obviously i like ttcc. it has mac and winn. i mean what who said that.theres a ghost in here....#and i can understand why people like or dont like each server. they all have pros and cons. but to me its like the two cakes image#sorry i felt the need to clarify bc i know im kindof exclusively a ttcc guy and me going 'ummmm well tt r doesnt have zap' might sound#like im hashtag hating but im not. tt r is awesome ok. i need to try it out one day.#i just really like zap as a gag. like anon stated i think it just really feels natural to the game#that water electric combo does wonders
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i just think its really funny that non spanish speakers tend to use querido a lot in buddie fic, as a pet name from eddie to buck, when irl it's not actually that common? i mean, maybe like 50 years ago it was but now no it isnt. do your research people! there's plenty of latino and native spanish speakers in this fandom- literally any of us could tell you. i guess cariño is acceptable, but i have yet to see anyone use amor or mi amor in fic, which are the most common pet names across the whole hispanic community. there's literal evidence of el mismisimo ryan guzman calling his wife mi amor, why not follow his lead? it's not that hard. if you, as a writer, dont feel confident or comfortable writing in another language then just... dont.
#i have a lot of feelings about how people write eddie's latinidad and i have to make it everyone else's problem#there are so many other pet names rathen that just querido pls just. stop using it lmao#im prwtty good at ignoring bad spanish in fic but like. its really not that hard!! rule 1 do not use google translate rule 2 ask a latinx#i call my partner amor and bebé if anyone was wondering which its literally calling them love and baby#other terms of endearment i like are vida/mi vida although personally thats sooo commited to me haha#like old married people say that#also cielo is kinda cute. cielito mío if you want it cuter.#there are literally so many options why stick to querido it doesnt even sound that good#jj.txt#buddie fic#rants#buddie#eddie speaks spanish better than most authors
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Lmaooo so pretty much since I started, my work friend who works in the freezer/cooler sections has been trying to get me to come help over there (I actually cannot as I am not SAFE certified. He knows this but still it's just a running joke) and the other week I was working Health and Beauty and he was like "hey hey hey uh uh! You're supposed to help ME!" To which I said that only one person can ask a day and Bootleg already asked that day. So a couple days ago he was leaving the breakroom as I was coming in to clock in, as was our mutual work buddy who also works that area. He goes "ah ah ah you gotta help work the cooler today. See I asked before anyone else could!" To which I said "ah man, I'm not clocked in yet, doesn't count!" And went in to clock in as they left
So yesterday our mutual work buddy was like "so I heard you're coming to the cooler 👀" (again joking) and I just said "nope he's a liar. He's telling you lies man. But I heard YOU'RE coming to clothing."
We just laughed and went on with what we had been doing.
But TODAY I guess when RC came in to lunch, he was telling Homicidal Forklift Driver that I should move to the cooler. Like trying to get someone else to back them up that I should switch bc they see what a good job I do in clothing so I would be able to make the shelves look nice there too
RC was like oh hell no, I need her in clothing man. She's like the one person there who works!
To which they both said, "yeah and imagine how nice the cooler would look!"
She told them that I actually had mentioned yesterday that it didn't really sound like a bad deal, but that I'd 100% be moved back to clothing within a month bc no one but me can handle the kids section 😅
Felt nice though having people "fight" over me/praise my work sgdgdggdg getting that recognition for how well I do my job
I really dont think I'd mind working in the cooler, or fresh, but I hate having to check for close expiration dates and the boxes are so so heavy 😰
Plus I think the girl who recovers clothing second shift would kill me agsgdgdggd she'd like come in as a customer 8am on the dot and track me down to beg me to come back to clothing bc she can't handle the mess that is kids without me 😅
Anyways that made me laugh to hear
#marquilla#i mean 👀 it's a viable way out if NewLady pisses me off bad enough and they dont move her first agdggdgdgdh#ive seen the SAFE certification test before and it's mostly common sense food handling imo it's just that the specifics are what get you is#what ive heard like theres basically no room for error (which is good bc safe food handling SHOULD be that high a priority) and you need to#know 100% what the correct temps for the safe zone are ect ect (i did at one point know them i just dont remember)#anyway anyways thats funny that he's got HFD on board and he doesnt even work in that area 😭 he works recieving#which is another job ive thought ab tbh like if i ever get forklift certified i think i want to work back there bc they get to unload trucks#and sign for packages from what ive seen and they get to work the big door thats satisfying to open shdgdggd i got to do that once bc i was#over there and whoever is closest no matter your actual job is supposed to let them in and let a receiving person know and damn is that#door fun to watch open and close 👀 i ALMOST got to close it yesterday but they didnt leave before i was done :( shdhdhhdhd#i think unloading the trucks would be fun bc you drive the pallets around the store or just dump em in the dock if it's past 8am but then#you have to clear the dock if someone else filled it overnight 😒 but hey that might still be fun idk#and as far as I know the 4am recieving crew all like me a lot abdbbdbdgd so other than working with HFD it wouldn't be so bad#i think we should be allowed to shadow other areas like not specifically cross training but like i think working liquidations/claims would#be fun but it might not be idk only problem with that and recieving is that it's very loud in the back and idk if id be allowed those yellow#headphones or earplugs to dampen the sound or not#i think any of those jobs would be fun. id really like to work bakery but im allergic to too many common ingredients that id be#afraid that i might not be a great fit like yes gloves exist but still idk if thats a safe/good idea job wise...#ANYWAYS dhddhhdhd
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part of me still feels like i might be sort of genderfluid and/or bisexual but just traumatized about it. no idea anymore
#like. remember that. remember following me back when i was bi and genderfluid lol. awhile ago now#its like whatever to me now. its really hard for me to pin anymore#like when i feel like genderfluid and bi again i feel like i can be a lot more open about shit#but i dont really even know. its hard#i feel like. and this is just like. me yknow. i feel like if i wasnt dating a man i'd be missing out on something that i want#like i dont know if i would be content just marrying a woman and being satisfied if i. didnt have a husband. yknow what i mean#and its like. if *I* wasnt a man i'd be sad. if in a relationship i wasnt someone's boyfriend or husband i'd be sad about it#so this is what wraps back around to me being a gayboy about it yknow#its complicated because no matter the gender label outcome. i would STILL want testosterone and surgery and masculine terms#and i KNOW this doesnt mean anything for some people. like some women do all that and are women#so i could just be not-a-man and still want all this anyways#but i also know it doesnt make it any less complicated for some of these women. who also had to think about themselves a lot in this way#its this weird notion of whatever ends up happening i... physically want the same shit anyways. THAT stays almost completely static#so that for me is a breather. its just like.... idk ... if i ever got in a relationship with a woman#i'd feel like i would be intrinsically. missing out on something i wanted#which i think is what a lot of burgeoning gay kids feel generally. right#like if you went down this stringent path laid out for you that you'd be missing out on. your life that you want. right.#i dont know what i want out of that really. sometimes i feel like im too out of it to pursue anything romantically anymore anyways#i do sometimes think it'd be cool to be a butch woman. kinda..?#i think what i like about that is the masculinity of myself is gender non-confirming if i were a woman#which if im a masc guy i'm just like. your average dude. like. right#but i wanna be a bear about it. i wanna fag it up about it. and my metric of being transgender im not ... average about how i present mysel#can someone teach me how to fag it up. the construction worker part of this is working right#sighhhh.... i have to go shower. maybe i;'ll have a shower epiphany or something. sighhhhh#sometimes in my head being a woman would be alright. but its like.. i dont even know how to decode it#i think some people would call what im feeling being genderfluid. some people might call it something else. it depends on like. you yknow#and what you want. and what makes you smile. me? not quite so sure anymore#and i think its like. this sounds like its laid quite bare right. but its hard to word even.#but sometimes im like. am i just like. talking ...? yknow what i mean.
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Hey guys. gay rights
#i already made the sonic one a while bc yknow. kinnie stuff youve all seen my blog theme#but then i was wearing my Fearless Year of Shadow(tm) shirt along with it and my irl bff was like.#'why are you wearing a sonic bracelet with that shirt if you love shadow so much 🤨' *#(he doesnt know much about sth stuff but ive infodumped abt shadow and his backstory to him many times)#and i was like 😭😭 BECAUSE I DONT HAVW A SHADOW KANDI BUT I WANNA MAKE ONE. I WILL SOON#so. now i do!! taking my ad/derall on the weekends always make me want to make more kandi. its great!#and yknow what else it makes me want to do...... talk more on here >:3333#me and my dad are gonna go to a local jazz festival this afternoon bc our jazz combo is playing at it!!#itll be fun. my dad said hes gonna get some food from this really good breakfast place on the way thwre#which is not the best part. the best part is outside the shop there is a wonderful kitty cat who hangs around the parking lot#bc hes owned by the ppl who own the bar right next door#its so great. everybody knows him (the cat) and loves him. the v/ape shop next door has a tip door set up for him even though the#bar owner ppl take care of him and take him to the vet nd stuff. my dad found a faceb/ook page somebody made for him#and apparently it just has pictures of ppl at the bar holding him. its so great and hilarious. this cat is so loved#by the v/ape shop people. by random people at this beachtown bar. by the breakfast shop people.#anyways uh. this post was abkut kandi wasnt it 😭😭😭 lol#cherry chortles#anyways the add/er/all also usually makes me want to look at and sort through my pkmn card collection. so imma do that#because my dads friend (and my friend too i guess! me and him exchange cat photos bc he has this adorable chunky cat named gremlin) that we#play bar trivia with on tuesdays (dw its not really even a bar. its mostly a restaurant) asked me abt my pokemon card collection#bc the final question was to put a few franchises (it was like. dora the ecplora and spide/rman etc. and pokemon) in order of revenue#and obvs pokemon was the top. bc of factors like the trading cards so thats how that came up#we didnt bet any of our points btw but we almost! got it right! the order was pk/mn dora spidamen friends (the tv seies) but we had spidman#as second. but we still won!! our team is on a two game winning streak!!! we always split the money so next week ill get another 8 dolla >:3#wow i havent hit tag limit yert#lol. yall'll open the 'see all tags' thing and boom. do you love the color of the sky type shit 😭😭😭#sorry that sounds too much like aave. i (white baby) cant be sayin that#cherrys kandi#okay well i had a tag with a verse from the ultimarw showdown bc i didnt know what else to say#but with my kandi tag and these two tags i have hit tag limit. thank you folks ill be here all night
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eve and her family were initially written to be catholic (because that is the ONLY religion i have any personal experience with) but im kind of enraptured (LOL) by the very concept of rapturing. so i think i might make them evangelicals instead? that will be such a pain though i have 0 experience with evangelicals. or really protestants of any flavor.
#sanctuary#ugh maybe fundies. im having so mcuh trouble with this#bc i cant just go 'theyre christian' bc theres fucking#lutheran? orthodox? baptist? presbytarian? congregational? methodist? QUAKER???#im DEFINITELY going to be working with christianity rather than make up a religion#because im so bad at making up religions. it would just sound silly#also i like crucifix symbolism#i also feel like evangelicals are more ummmm relevant to todays america#but ughhhhhhhhh i dont even know what other churches look like inside. or what the fuck you Do in them#i really am also so entranced by a lot of catholic traditions too#rosary beads are a big thing. i even have a rosary in my room right now...#plus the fixation on mary which is relevant to EVE as a character#but it might work better if she DOESNT have that?#and the eucharist. do other christians even do that???#ok i looked it up they do but they arent literal about it. BORING!
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