#whether thats a good or bad thing isnt up to me

[bluwus-art]

He is ready for summer ☀️ 🏝️

[snekdood]

i really try to understand why my fellow progressives are so avoidant of actually introspecting on why they think its still cool to bully. im sorry but thats just an inherently conservative thing to want to do.

[honeytonedhottie]

decentering men and recentering urself⋆.ೃ࿔*:･💅🏽💓

the secret to decentering men and not having ur entire world revolving around them (bcuz it should be revolving around you, duh) is having a fulfilling life. it makes me ICK so bad when im watching a video or reading a post and im rly loving it, and then it'll find SOME way to make it revolve around men. like can we not?…💬🎀

WHY WE CENTER THE OPPOSITE SEX ;

a lot of people find themselves centering their lives around the opposite sex in an attempt to fill a void within themselves. they do it because they aren't happy with themselves or their lives, or maybe its learned behavior. whatever the reason is, its NOT hot.

some things that someone who centers men might think are "oh my life is so boring, maybe it would be spiced up if i got with a man" or "maybe it'll bring some excitement into my day" like EUGHHH. obviously the solution is to find ways to make our lives fulfilling but how do we do that? and how do we get to the root cause and squash this self sabotaging behavior?

SELF AWARENESS ;

if u have nothing going on for u, ofc ur gonna be energetically desperate and accepting anything and EVERYTHING. practice self awareness and try to get to the root cause of why u center men through things like shadow work, therapy, or just straight up having an honest conversation with urself cuz i swear it helps.

when you make the conscious effort to build ur dream life you'll notice that people that are on the same mindset as you will vibe with the REAL you. the need to fake/adjust urself to fit in with other people will dissipate because ur fitting into ur own standards and ur connections will be more meaningful because of it.

TAKE UR POWER BACK ;

no ones actions should ruin ur day or make u upset for more then a day (even less) cuz its YOUR world. 💕🍰

make time for YOU, doll. plan self care routines for urself every week. doing face masks, journalling, vision boarding, WHATEVER U LIKE TO DO. making time for urself reminds u that ur the main character of ur life so u dont have to settle for crumbs.

stop giving that power to someone else and dictate how u feel, NOT the actions of a significant other or the opposite sex or anybody. the reason why its important to make sure that ur the center of ur own life is so that you can be happy and fulfilled regardless of if there is a man or if there isnt a man present. so the objective is to decenter men -> and then put yourself at the center

GET A HOBBY ;

find something to make ur life fulfilling. pursue ur OWN interests and try out different hobbies if ur unsure of what ur interests are yet. cultivate ur world to the point where it GLEAMS with perfection and then do a little extra. build a life that u love so much that whether u get male attention or validation doesnt even matter cuz their opinions have little to no relevance 💀

challenge yourself: next time you catch yourself thinking, ‘would a guy like this?’ flip it and ask urself "hey, do i like this?" start checking with yourself first instead of checking with others.

MAKING THE DECISION TO DECENTER MEN ;

decentering men simply means that ur deciding to no longer think, feel, act, dress, or plan ur life around a man or for the validation of any man…💬🎀

relationships will actually get BETTER when u decenter the opposite sex. cuz ur not looking for someone to compete with and ur whole on ur own. this sets the stage for balance and mutual respect and THATS hot.

you can be in a relationship and still decenter men. decentering men simply means that you are the priority, not the relationship. how can we tell if we're decentering men or not? here are a few questions to help you know if u are ->

if i did not care about looking good to the opposite sex what would i actually like to wear?

if i did not get married, how could i create the best and most abundant life for myself?

what hobbies/interests do i have that dont involve being around men/have male attention as a component of it?

[lubrumalis]

konig headcanons! (realistic)

tw: nsfw

all of these are realistic hc! dont expect a normal konig

hes NOT a shy awkward pushover, just because he has social anxiety??? we can see through his voice lines hes a very cocky person and speaks rather agressively

“lets be honest, its better off in my hands.”

i hc that just because konig has social anxiety, he doesn’t express this through bring soft and shy, he expresses it through his bluntness

konig wanted to be a sniper but did not because he couldn’t stand still, has social anxiety, i hc he has some form of adhd

his very cocky and blunt shouting isn’t because hes mean, but he just doesnt wanna be seen as that bullied kid he once was

hes doesnt have horrible EQ, but the kind of guy to be incredibly unfiltered

also, this guy was literally assigned as a human battering ram, you think hes all soft and sweet???😅😅😅

no he won’t get angry or cry if his mask is taken off. just annoyed.

its not actually canon that konig is a colonel (correct me if im wrong, i couldnt find anything on the official wiki) but lets assume hes one anyway

even if he isnt, gets paid well. really well.

private military companies that deploy soldiers in areas of active conflict can pay up to hundreds of thousands for one soldier

considering konigs age (late 30s at least) and skills, probably 400-500k a year.

chose to join the military because he had an obsession with tanks and guns as a kid

a lot of hc’s say hes 6’10. i disagree, simply based off of chances and the fact thats wayyyy too tall for the military

but he was described as a mountain, so id say his height is around 6’5-6’8

very very intimidating. hes tall big and has the mask of an executioner in the 15th century. who wouldn’t be scared?

definitely will say some random german word in a situation where no one else there knows german. he doesn’t give a damn lol

hates americans (thinks theyre all obese, mannerless, and bad at geography)

brings up the most random topics. again i really think konig has adhd.

konig was not good at school and hated it, mainly due to the anxiety and how he couldn’t pay attention

also why he chose the path of a soldier

drinks lots of beer, high alcohol tolerance, this guys a true european.

loves austrian or german food. loves schnitzel and pies.

konigs breakfast is literally sausages, toast, eggs, and sometimes beer

BIG APPETITE. he could eat for 3 people.

a little insecure about his appearance, not confident in his looks :( also why he hid his face

but as he grew older he uses the mask for actual purposes of concealing his identity, he is a special ops soldier after all

kind of a cheapskate. he chose to hide his face with what, polyester? chose a piece of cloth over everything else.

has very conservative beliefs. not to the point where he hates abortion and votes far right, konig is just a little confused about some things certain liberals believe in

pretty political person lmao

not enough info to conclude whether or not konig was abused as a kid tbh

he was definitely miserable for a period in his life. hes in the military living a monotone life, barely any contact with others, and constantly living in fear he’d die

i dont think hes as traumatized as ghost tho🙂🙂

konig appreciates his dna and how it makes him big and tall, but sometimes gets incredibly annoyed at it

mainly because well, he got bullied for itas a kid

because he specializes in hostage rescue a lot of hostages (especially kids) are scared of him and refuse to leave the area with him

takes a lot of convincing 🥲🥲

has a lot of intrusive thoughts

cannot use social media properly

also texts like an old grandpa. uses 😂 and 🤣 unironically.

“Can we have burgers 🍔 tonight🌃?”

probably uses a blackberry or reallyyyyy old iphone

relationship hcs:

konigs voice actor (jim boeven) stated in a livestream that konigs wife would ideally be a mix between maria pedraza (actress) and rachael from blade runner (character from movie).

both are 170cm ish and brunettes

i can actually see that—konig is massive and he probably prefers someone on the tall side

first thing you did that led to your relationship with him? you tolerated him that is. listened to him ranting😃

i can see him with a civilian or someone whos in the military tbh

finds you pretty at first

enjoys bickering, he needs someone to simulate his mind

you know those stories where his s/o is 5’2, clingy, soft af, and neeeeeeeds konig? haha you won’t be getting that from me.

unlike ghost, who really takes his time to get to know someone and opens up slowly, scared to have his trust broken again

konig charges in like the human battering ram he is😁

if he has a feeling you’re trustworthy you are trustworthy.

horrible at flirting. he doesn’t know how to talk to women smoothly

needs someone equally as weird and funny

s/o needs to be someone with very firm boundaries and can stand their ground, i think konigs a really stubborn person, so for a healthy relationship to work, s/o can’t be the generic bimbo

konig wears the pants in the relationship

doesn’t let you pay. he has a enough money and believes men should always pay

(im sorry to break your delusions) konig does not strike to me as someone who likes a docile homebody. thats ghost (if you remove the word docile).

he doesn’t like extremely dominant partners either

imagine someone who is a listener, accepting yet blunt, shares his quirks, and has a very elegant feel to them

also someone very independent

also gonna get killed for this but konig would realistically not go for a girl in her early twenties. he prefers elegance and sophistication over being cute and jumpy

hates one night stands.

values relationships more than you think. he can come off as strong at first, but hes trying his best

ecstatic when you tell him you wanna learn german (hes not a good teacher)

doesn’t like play fighting, he thinks he’s gonna accidentally hurt you

admires you a lot. he knows hes not the best looking person and doesn’t understand the makeup skincare dress up thing.

isn’t paranoid, but definitely doesn’t say he has an s/o

if you ever get mad at him, konig will tighten all jars in the kitchen so you have to ask him for help :)

extremely unfiltered. he hates your cooking? he will say it. that dress looks better than the other? he will say it.

[wisteriainslumber]

twst characters in a haunted house

its a short headcanon this time but its spooky season yayaayyayay!

warnings: cussing 👍 

Ace

talks a big game saying hes not scared, gets the daylights scared out of him, then goes back to talking a big game

he likes to tease his friends by abruptly grabbing them to scare them, but only teases yuu by saying 'if you're scared, you can hold onto me~' because hes a massive loser with a crush

you wouldn't even notice it but if you look closely his hands are shaking and he keeps looking around the room

arguably hes one of the most terrified one in the room so our unbothered king, yuu, just stands by his side out of sympathy

Deuce

close to tears and his last resort was complimenting a zombie's sfx makeup in hopes the Seven are on his side

probably looked like he was going to piss himself so the zombie 'helped' them out by chasing them until they stopped running in circles like headless chickens

flight or fight instinct goes haywire

it's either 'no means no!' or 'chase me i dare you!' and it solely depends on whether or not there are people in his group more afraid than him

because he will absolutely protect his loved ones awww

Jack

designated 'protector' of the first years (?)

its mostly self proclaimed but he is actually the most scared of the bunch

his ears pick up on EVERY little thing so he hears screams from all the other groups in the house

and that is unnerving!!

hes got a pretty good poker face but his ears and tail are standing up on end. and his tail is REALLY fluffed in agitation

height disadvantage. many dangly things getting caught in his hair and ears and tail. if he runs too fast and forgets to bend down, he's getting his head hit.

grim clung onto jack's tail after a bad scare and since then, has been jack's accessory

Epel

lost a bet and now he has to hold ace's hand throughout the house (let's be honest, this is for the safety of everyone else. its only the fight instinct for our poison apple)

sings random pop songs with ace for him to feel less scared because 1. epel likes his friends and 2. this is the only time he's allowed to be off-key for giggles

loves karma. when ace tries to scare him, epel will simply let go and carry on without ace until he apologizes

everyone and he means EVERYONE can catch these fists

'these arent screams these are battle cries'

creates new profanity out of freight. but he's always at the front of the group (so brave)

Ortho

literally taking notes throughout the haunt

intrigued, kinda wants to recreate it in a VR so his friends can experience it again

except when he does recreate it is literally SO much worse in terms of horror level

because he really does make it feel like the hunger games. its not even a game of survival its a battle of attrition

it gives everyone such a freight

but thats the point isnt it? he just found parts that could be improved on

like, the actors should be given chainsaws so the run for your life can feel more exhilarating!

and the rest of the doors should be removed so the players can use their problem solving skills to get to the one remaining door!

it does not get very popular sjdfjkgihuoij

Sebek

unbelievable that he cannot bring his baton but whatever

putting his life on the line to defend his friends

not because he cares, smh, he could live without their company! but fewer students in NRC would mean that lord malleus couldn't get the true school experience!

big brain moment (advice from lilia) he wore a scary costume in hopes that he scares the actors off before they scare him (he uses the cape to evade)

his body is on auto pilot and he knows what to do, but if you look at his face for too long, this dude is pissing himself silly

he did have a brave moment, though. he said a polite 'hello' to a vampire before demanding them to stop screaming so he could concentrate. slayed

Yuu & Grim

LMAOOOOOO scared?? *them*??? after all they've seen?

literally so unphased

in fact, since they live with ghosts in ramshackle, they might slink off somewhere and reappear alongside the actors to scare their friends

grim pees himself but denies it

in fact grim is like the first one to notice that yuu was not by his side

by the time they make it out of the house, they know all the actors by name???

yuu likes to offer bits of their hair as sacrifice if the actors leave them alone (sometimes they even offer grims fur)

the actors all look so sad to see yuu go??? favourtism smh

you know damn well yuu's getting a job offer for the house here. they'll even invite the rest of their friends to dress up and set them loose upon the haunted manor

Riddle

i would love to say he gets his brain rattled from fear but that is so not true

a childhood of seeing various floating, seemingly severed, limbs thanks to a certain che'nya has rewired his freight system

'its not scary because i know we're in a simulated situation. the actors are fake, the props are fake, the-' you get the jist

startled when something jumps in front of his face and gets mad when his group laughs at him

the actors are kinda scared of *him* because they interrupted him while he was in the middle of a long explanation and that was very rude!!! >:( come back after he's finished, thank you!

Ruggie

RUN LIKE THE WIND

he compliments all the props in the midst of the scare and chaos, who would notice something missing, fr?

a masked murderer would be crawling out of the closet and ruggie would casually ask them about the material the spoons were made of

his strength comes in when he's accidentally(?) sacrificing riddle to the haunters so he'll live

halfassingly playing smash or pass with jade aka jade says smash to everyone and ruggie questions the logistics of his every choice

accidentally remarks how the smell reminded him of his home growing up and doesnt that open a can of worms

Azul

joins ruggie in asking about the material of the spoons, except he's weirdly enthusiastic about it

also takes notes on the atmosphere and decorations

cant take the scare, his brain fizzles out and his muscle memory shakes the hands of the haunters (introducing himself was entirely intentional, however)

biggest loser in terms of he tries to huddle up to EVERYONE for 'safety' purposes. buddy-buddy system duhh

(he's the first to hide under a chair)

Jade

mean girl who flashes her teeth at people then covers his mouth acting like he didnt expose that he could tear out anyones jugular without struggle (he is holding back a coughing fit from the dust)

having such a calm, serene smile the entire time

its as if hes taking a casual stroll

'oh hello there. mind if i borrow this? thanks.' and steals the prop axe from the actors

whether he chooses to chase them back or not solely depends on his whims that day but he becomes a bigger menace because hes smiling with sharp teeth AND holding an axe

Floyd

screams back at the scare actors just Because

doesnt actually register theyre trying to scare them with their screams 'cause?? lmao thats not how u scare people let him teach you-

likes to lurk in the dim lighting to scare other patrons like if he was the one on the job and not paying for the experience

likes to drag out every single actor when riddle's speaking and egg him to behead them all

evil friend who hums in the dark just to get on your nerves

Kalim

screams, then laughs like a good sport about it. you got him good!!

trick or treating is everywhere and this haunted manor is full of tricks! do they get candy after though?

he tries his best to link arms with the actors and chat with them, even if he receives groans and scripted threats in response

he invites the entire cast over to Asim palace because he thinks his siblings would like to experience it (awww)

never worry about losing kalim in the house because he's belled like a cat, so just listen for the jingles of his movement

Jamil

is there really anything scarier than being alive to this guy

he really doesn't appreciate the cobwebs strung up everywhere

nor does he appreciate the sensation of anything brushing on his skin because it makes him feel itchy

the only time theres a reaction from him is if fake blood gets on his own or kalim's clothes because bitch. he will be the one cleaning that so you better fucking not.

the responsible one that keeps azul's glasses safe. not because azul hands them over himself but because silver asked him to (something along the lines of jamil being the kind of person that would ensure personal belongings stay safe or some other ego boosting shit. yeah, it worked slightly, what of it?)

Silver

desensitized to horror

the only time he appreciates the halloweens spent in childhood wetting his bed because of lilia's (psychologically harmful) pranks

if lilia's scares were a 10, this haunted house is like a 3

he proclaims himself as azul's bodyguard and always seeks his hand out so azul can feel a bit safer to go on

silver will also be the first one to locate the emergency exits as well as accompany anyone who needs to tap out (we dont deserve him <3)

Trey

same as riddle except hes even more unphased

in the same year as che'nya and they were together for much more and much longer

and they go beyond just his floating limbs, because he made half of trey disappear into, well, somewhere

che'nya complained about not being able to find his left pinky finger for WEEKS

he accepts like one, maybe two people clinging onto him but more than that and hes kindly telling you to suck it up bc its getting inconvenient to move

sorry 🤷 uh, exposure therapy ig

Cater

managed to sneak his phone in even though no phones were allowed just to film everything

he used a flashlight and still managed to hide his phone (he's able to outrun them, but his screaming instantly puts a beacon on him)

screaming for the life of him but he will never ever EVER forget to do a peace sign for the cams

will constantly ask how the actors managed to make the makeup so realistic and starts handing out friendship bracelets (he made too many with kalim one time with no one to give them to)

those clips of people getting chased in haunted houses then going to hug them is so cater-core (enforcing reverse psychology)

Leona

also pretends he's not affected and sells it very well

he reminds himself that these are props and stuff

he can see much more in the dark, but if you pay attention during a scare, you'd see a visible shiver go up his tail

its gone as soon as you blink though

regularly has a RBF and glares at the actors as if they've wronged him somehow

also an evil friend that will sacrifice you to the scare actors but more than that, he will sacrifice your children and tease them (waving bye bye with a smile and walking away). if only it scared cheka more and not make him laugh and declare he'll protect unca

Vil

plays along because its good to respect the work the actors and staff put into making this experience

still he thinks the sfx blood on the walls couldve benefited from a bit more time assembling

shamefully and accidentally cusses loudly in a moment of freight and apologizes profusely to the actor

taunting leona & telling the haunters to search for him bc he tripped and his ring accidentally snagged vil's hair (petty)

only time vil screams is when he misses a step and thought he was gonna go tumbling. idia laughed at him.

Rook

he chases the actors back

he's all giggly about it too

when hes run out of actors to chase after, he'll start nominating one member of their group to be hunted for sport

another one of the dresses up squad, except he uses it to camouflage himself with the actors

touches everything like this is just a fun little stroll for him

him and trey are having a casual conversation trying to guess the era this ancient candelabra originated from and the background noise is provided by idia sobbing and crying for dear life (leona is trying to sacrifice him)

Idia

somehow both bragging about how fake everything is whilst also cowering behind malleus and screaming the loudest out of the third years

says whatever comes to mind in a panic. no one knows wtf idias aim is. everyone is confused. the art of misdirection, everyone

god forbid he sees a ghost because he freezes out of pure instinct and you'll have to drag or carry him if you need him to move (rip ghost marriage idia)

makes fun of the buff monster costumes because LOLOL LMAOAOA you think thats supposed to scare him??? try harder

no survivial instinct. doesnt run. at all. if he's scared, he's giving up, this is his grave.

Malleus

doesn't get the concept at all

and not in the 'what is so scary about this place' way its more of a 'but the architecture is so magnificent, a little tweaks can get it restored to its former glory'

straight up snatches the floating ghost doll not knowing (or caring..???) that it was decor and rocks it throughout the entire house. does he think its unjustly cursed or does it remind him of silver? who knows

he really likes the aesthetic of the haunted house and everyone that tries to scare *him* are immediately in his good graces. he laughs all evil-like too and scares everyone but dw he's having fun i promise

normal people fall to the floor in haunted houses

malleus falls in love *ew*

Lilia

not that idia needed more reasons to be frightened but lilia fans the fire

shares a rumour about a clown doll that got abandoned so now it hunts people in retribution and of course there's an actor dressed like a killer clown there yk

throwing some bs about how 'oh no, i hope theres not a tall, scary, killer after us with an axe' and when said killer shows up, lilia starts screaming and pulling horrific scary faces at them (the staff leave him tf alone after this interaction)

and if hes feeling particularly mean he'll slink off into the shadows to reappear like a little jumpscare (cmon lilia, you're gonna have to do idias laundry now)

also chills on the ceiling after a chaotic run-in just to give his group some panic when they lose lilia (minus vil & leona, they know better than to worry about lilia's well-being— he's been adjusting too well here)

[ganondoodle]

seeing all the crazy stuff people build in totk kinda ... it feels like that is also a factor in why it turned out like this, like the insane things people did in botw and the (i keep saying devs when i actually mean the directors .. producers?) directors saw it and build totk just around letting people do it all 100 times more

to be clear, i think its impressive as hell what some people build (i just saw like .. a movie scene with a functioning mech gozilla and tanks made with totks building stuff ... what the fuck) and those things go pretty viral (understandibly so) but i also gotta question

as creative, free, and impressive as it is ... should that have been the focus in a zelda game? like .. is building mechas and tanks like that something that should be in a zelda game? can it be in there without inevitably sacrificing so much else? theres building games just for that? and if you want to make it zelda themed you can make it a spin off?

like i get it, people did crazy things in botw, they saw what people had fun with and dialed it up to a 1000 in totk, which in itself is not bad, even pretty good if you consider gamedevs and feeback and all that bc in general you should embrace what people had fun with in your game even if it wasnt the intent, given that nintendy listens to feedback (perhaps even a bit too much at times) and creative solutions was a central point to botw design philosophy but

i feel like totk kinda .. missed the balance?

if its really a reason why totk is build around enabling that in a purely player centered toy box kind of way without it actually mattering in the story .. or even themes ... was it worth it? not to sound like an oldschool boomer tm but in a franchise that iconic, lore and story focused, should you really abandon nigh all lore/story cohesion just to give the player a big box of toys in a world where i feel that doesnt ,, really belong? in a direct sequel in the same world with the same characters no less? that point is perhaps the biggest issue with it, bc again lots of games even if somwhat a sequel, had strange new tech or things in the world but in all of those cases it was some alternative universe, millenia after the other game, or on an entire different continent; while totk is supposedly just a few years after botw in the very same hyrule

(still doesnt explain the erasing of all shiekah things and replacing it with sonau- tho suddendly revealing the shiekah had actual rockets, wheels with suspension and grenade-launchers, might have been confusing too- you could have enabled the player creativity with shiekah too imo, and personally i would have found it way more fun ... lil guardian leg crawlies ..)

having thought about it feels rather logical why they did it in alot of ways, but also ... totk is build around it, while its also not build around it at all- its build around the PLAYER, not the world, not the story, not the theme, not the character, but YOU (especialyl those that dont realyl care about anythign story or lore stuff and just want to have fun with the gameplay loop, which isnt wrong, but i question whether thats the right kind if player to center in a zelda game .... also not saying all of those that build these crazy things are like that but- ... i hope you know what i mean)

(i know games are always build around the player, or should be, but .. do you get what i mean????? playing in a world that doesnt make sense anymore bc its all a box of toys yeeted into my face isnt fun to me, bc im here not only for gameplay fun but for the world .. theme .. characters, its something that has to be harmonical as a whole for me and totk just .. isnt)

i say it alot but i do really mean it, its very difficult to get my thoughts and feelings written out and to have them come across correctly

[reallife6anoufriev6boy6]

DROP THE LORE ON YOUR HOMESTUCK AU !!!!!!!!!!!!111

tcc homestuck au!

im so excited to talk about this holy shit. you guys should ask me for more au content - i have so many aus!

so to start, im following the basic naming rule in homestuck where they have to have six letter names. thats why theyre names will be “misspelled” here.

however, im not following the normal zodiac colors because thats boring. they will also have their natural hair colors because i cant seem them having black hair…

anyways!

ERICCK HARRIS

doomedRebel [DR]

gunkind

prince of time

ericck is a seemingly average bronzeblood troll, however unlike his counterparts he isnt as meek and submissive to their highblood overlords.

he has a mind of his own as theyd say and he isnt afraid to speak it, but of course hes smart enough to not say it so freely.

he has been apart of several groups who tried to start rebellions, but they were quickly brought down. he was lucky to not have been caught, but now he has been putting together a plan with his moirail.

his lusus is a big dog that closely resembles a doberman.

ericck is pretty average height, a little lanky, but seemingly well rounded minus the dip in his chest. he has a short, brown buzzcut thats almost constantly covered by a backwards hat. he always wears a white tshirt with his zodiac sign on it in black as well as jeans and boots.

kismesis: none

auspistice: none

matesprite: none

moirail: dylann klebold

DYLANN KLEBOLD

vengefulVodka [VV]

gunkind

knight of breath

dylann is the lowest on the spectrum, being a redblood, but he seems to get around easy enough.

he shares the same hatred for their system with ericck and it was how they bonded quickly, being moirails since he could remember. he doesnt speak his mind about it as much as his friend, but he still thinks the same way.

hes a little more laid back and calm, but its not hard to get him on edge. him and ericck are very protective of each other and will snap quickly if the other is bothered.

dylann is tall and lanky, not quite fitting into his body. he has shoulder length blonde hair that he occasionally wears in a pony tail, but typically has a hat to cover it. he wears a black t shirt with his zodiac symbol on it in red and jeans with boots.

his lusus is a dog as well, but it more closely resembles a german shepherd.

kismesis: none

auspistice: none

matesprite: none

moirail: ericck harris

ARTYOM ANOUFRIEV

ostentatiousHammer [OH]

hammerkind

bard of heart

artyom is a perpetually sober purpleblood who does not partake in absolutely any activities or traditions associated with his blood color.

his lack of sopor intake though has caused him to constantly be on edge, ready to hurt. theres never a dull moment with him.

he has a large ego and is rather pretentious. he says to not like their societal system, but he only likes it when it works for him. he is a very violent individual, but is well liked by others around him.

artyom is tall and skinny with a blonde, silky mullet. he wears a black t shirt with his zodiac sign on the top corner along with jeans and boots.

he does not have a lusus. his lusus abandoned him very early on, which would mean certain death, but he was able to live on his own and stay under the radar.

kismesis: none

auspistice: none

matesprite: none

moirail: nikita lytkin (?)

NIKITA LYTKIN

dismemberedHead [DH]

hammerkind

page of doom

nikita has an unknown blood color, having kept it a secret since the day he was hatched. no one knows about it besides artyom - whether thats a good or bad thing is up for debate.

he’s extremely introverted and doesnt talk to anyone outside of his moirallegience and typically keeps to himself. hes incredibly self destructive and depressed with poor hygiene.

his relationship with artyom is complicated and toxic. they identify as moirails, but he feels flushed for him while artyom on the other hand is halfway to feeling pitch.

nikitas average height with a skinny body besides the fat that sticks out here and there. he has greasy black hair thats plastered to his head and he wears a black hoodie with his favorite band, jeans, boots, a bandana around his face and sunglasses.

he lacks a lusus as well, having been abandoned early on too. he didnt handle it as well as his friend.

kismesis: none

auspistice: none

matesprite: none

moirail: artyom anoufriev (?)

[possumteeths]

One thing about veilguard that bums me out is that this is the very first bioware game that I dont feel any desire to play again. All of the decisions made in the game either dont matter or are made for you so there’s no wondering like “what wouldve happened if I did this instead of that?” There’s so many moments in the game where it felt as if I should really debate what option to pick, only to realize through playing more that decisions really don’t matter. So all decisions made in later stages of the game just kinda feel meaningless.

Everything is set up so one dimensionally that the replay value is unfortunately very low. Theres very few ways to play things differently. I was incredibly disappointed that you do not have the option to kill Lucanis’s shitty cousin. You dont even get any option at ALL over what to do with him. It doesnt matter what you do with the bald warden dude, it doesnt matter whether or not you chose to kill that rando mayor… and the list goes on.

I used replay bioware games just to get different DIALOGUE! This game had very little in terms of meaningful dialogue! Much of the dialogue between characters feels so flat or unrelated to the plot. Character conflict is extremely forced so replaying the game wouldn’t necessarily give you anything new to chew on. Its frustrating that Rook is designated as the group’s therapist, but is often completely sidelined by everyone and everything going on! I romanced Lucanis and he still was hella flirting with Neve which made the romance route feel like a complete afterthought.

Approval ratings dont matter at all, theres genuinely nothing that changes besides your own insight to the different characters worldviews. If someone disliked something, you dont get different dialogue or attitude or nuffin! What does hardening even do in DAV? Neve or Lucanis being hardened has no impact on anything at all besides some rando skill buffs. I thought maybe Harding or Davrin’s endgame sacrifice wouldve meant something more if you had some way of hardening them.

It felt just kind of random to kill off one of your companions in the endgame. Especially when you’ve played through the entire game making choices that were ultimately meaningless. The choice of who dies in the endgame feels just as meaningless as everything else because you the player have spent the entire game realizing that approval ratings dont matter, plot choices dont matter, characterization choices dont matter etc. So if they want to do something as heavy hitting as killing off a main character, wouldnt it have made more sense to build it up in a way that there would be SOME emotional impact? If you were able to harden Davrin or Harding, then killing them wouldve hit harder dang it! Killing off characters feels just cheap when youre overly aware that nothing matters.

No matter your choices in this game, its still going to play the exact same every time with very little deviation. Its almost like playing a telltale game or something. The plot is pathed out for you, your choices are superfluous, your romance options are as noteworthy as skyrim’s “put on a necklace, okie doke now you’re married.”

The game itself isnt bad, but it reminds me of a mass market paperback book. The kinds that come out monthly. You know exactly what the plot is gonna be, you know there’s gonna be a cast of characters, you know theres gonna be bad guys and good guys.., and then you finish the book thinking “Yup that was ok!” Then you shelve it and never look at it again because its one amongst 17492820102 others in the genre. To use another metaphor, this game is buttered toast, it feels like something youve had before, its familiar, it tastes good… but thats it. Its just bread and butter, and theres no sense dressing it up or toasting the bread more or less because at the end of the day… its still toast.

[krasytoonz]

YOU DRAW BARNABY AND HOWDY SO SWEET AND CUTE

I need you all to Understand why I ship them So much — they work so well as lovers, you see, because they are kind of opposites, yet they complement each other

Barnaby being the Funny one who always makes Howdy laugh (WHICH IS SO SO HEALTHY ISNT IT), and Howdy can just ramble about his issues to Barnaby, whether it’s his Family or anything, and he is his favorite customer and every Audio of them together always involve some sort of good friendship — IT JUST WORKS GUYS

Howdy knows how to make Barnaby’s favorite dish, which is why he’s always visiting him, and the fact that Howdy is so open with Barnaby shows that there’s a huge level of trust between them

Howdy’s personality is quick, upbeat and well, ‘confrontational’ (or better word… Sassy), while Barnaby is relaxed, loves joking around and from what I could tell, he likes to playfully tease the other neighbors (mainly Frank) BUT IT WORKS BECAUSE… WELL YOU SEE THE VISION RIGHT?

somebody Help me

I am assuming that Howdy is usually Overworked and don’t really have breaks much, but whenever Barnaby visits and tells him Jokes, it makes him ease up. And out of all the neighbors, he gets along well with Barnaby very very well

I could just imagine whenever Howdy has a bad day, Barnaby comes in, tells a joke, and it brightens up his mood. and he’ll go, “This is the reason why you are my Favorite Customer.” AND IT DOESNT EVEN HAVE TO BE ROMANTIC BECAUSE THEY ALSO WORK SO WELL AS FRIENDS TOO AND JRWOMDMDEIODMCJEKEMSMW

i am going insane

but yes I really really do love beaglepillar/laughingstock because it’s such a fun healthy dynamic they have — I’d imagine if they do argue about something, I doubt that it’s going to last long, because I know that Barnaby will possibly Apologize first, since Howdy might have a little bit of an ego — BUT THATS THE FUN PART BECAUSE he loves Barnaby, he will forgive him and apologize too AND THAT ITSELF — THE ABILITY TO COMMUNICATE — IS SUCH A GOOD THING IN RELATIONSHIPS

Why am I typing a psychoanalysis on two puppets’ relationship with each other I swear I am Doomed

ALSO

they are quite literally shaped differently — Barnaby being round, and Howdy being more ‘angular’/boxy — ITS JUST FUN TO DRAW AND OMFHFJFNNFD THEY LOOK SO WELL TGT HONESTLY

[headcanons-n-shit]

Hello

Your newest post reminded me i had an idea. The bois comforting wol who is having a nervous brakedown from all the stress. Bonus Ardbert.

I really like your stories. Especially the angsty ones.

(TAZ The Breakdown plays in the background)

(Mild shadowbringers spoilers)

Thancred literally (accidentally but still) disassociated so hard from the stress that he gave up his body to the bad guy for a bit. If anyone gets what youre going through, its probably going to be him. Hes not going to waste his time on empty platitudes: hes going to get you a glass of water, a warm blanket, and a hot meal, and let you cry it out on his shoulder for as long as you need to.

(And if that still doesnt help, well. Sex is still on the table. Its rarely a good idea, but hes all out of those.)

Urianger is probably breaking down with you lets be real. Every future my mans has ever read has included world-ending catastrophe, and, sure, youve thwarted it every time (usually with his help) but. What if this time you dont? What if this time you fail???? Its an unreasonable amount of stress for one man to be carrying. He probably does a fantastic amount of fantasy weed to cope and still all it takes is seeing you break down for him to also start blubber-crying.

Graha seems kind of detached and distant at first. "Shower water food" he commands you, in the voice of Lynas grandfather the Crystal Exarch, firm and uncompromising and impossible to disobey, and you might miss the way his voice and smile are strained. The way his hands clench and unclench at his sides. Hes never regretted turning back time to help you save two worlds, but. Its times like this that he wonders if he shouldnt try again to give you a happier ending.

Estinien is a firm hand on your shoulder, a steady shoulder to lean on, because he gets it. The feeling of being trapped in your own body, puppetted by powers so much greater than you can imagine, almost greater than you can comprehend... Youre breaking down for the both of you, honestly, because hes spent so long training the iron discipline to resist nidhoggs influence that he doesnt know how to anymore. This is. Cathartic. For the both of you tbh.

Aymeric wishes in this moment, more than anything, that he could just. Just be with you. Out on your journeys, giving you support by your side instead of from a distance. And he knows, he knows, that the support he gives you is important, that his ability to move nations in your favor has helped far more than any single sword at your side ever would. But he bears the weight of a nation while you bear the weight of a star, and that just. Doesnt seem fair to him.

Haurchefant knows that theres some things that hot chocolate cant fix but. Its a good starting place if nothing else. Something warm and sweet right now couldnt hurt, neither would a soft blanket and a roaring fire. He'll sit with you, bundled up together, and just listen if thats what you need. Or he can talk-- he has plenty of embarrassing stories about Artoirel that he hasnt shared yet. Either way, he'll happily help you wipe your tears away when youre done, and then drop a delicate kiss on your forehead.

Stand tall, he says. A smile better suits a hero.

Sidurgu is surprisingly good at this. Or, maybe not so surprising? Rielle is very mature for her age, but shes still a child. He probably does this whole song and dance every other week. And you feel a little bit like a child, the way he bullies you into the shower and then bundles you up in blankets and pushes food at you, but. Beneath the gruff words and scowl you can tell hes worried. Frustrated. This is exactly the kind of injustice that as a dark knight he swore he would fight, but hes just one man, there isnt much he can do about the desolation of the star. But he also needs you to know that he'll always be in your corner. Whether in this little way or if you need him to help you kill a god, he'll always come when you call.

BONUS

Ardbert has never felt so helpless in his life. He cant touch you, cant be a shoulder you can cry on. He cant even fetch you a glass of water. All he can do is stand there and watch as you break apart in your bed in the Pendants, and its. Its torture, worse than anything any ascian could ever conceive.

Still. He does what he can. And if all he can do is sit at your bedside, his hand hovering half-through yours in a mockery of touch while he tells you stories of his adventures, or friendship and triumph and happier times, well. Its the least he can do.

[sunlit-mess]

Hello, I hope it's not rude but I'm REALLY REALLY fond of your art!!!!! I was scrolling through your blog from new to old and found that you have Bpd,,,. I only heard about this condition, what is it like? If it's ok to know,,,!

hello, thank u! uhm it's something? HAHAHAHA idk how to explain it 😭🏳 lemme try to be as direct as possible

I'm high-functioning, but there are points I seriously just start showing symptoms.

Emotions: INTENSE as it can get while FEELING 99 PERCENT EMPTY. Something just- keeps you so.. hungry (not literally). Sensory is also another factor, and honestly I burn out a lot, tend to get overwhelmed n meltdown like shit

Identity: I either have BEEF WITH it, feel GODLY, or be so LOW, really low. I live with both passion and hate. I'm very confused. But I can say I'm just tired!

Attachments: Relationships are so hard to maintain bc of how much I fear abandonment, like bro I can't even leave my family as much as I want to. I'm more scared of getting disowned or losing my name. Love is a concept I long to grasp at the same time scared of it, I don't understand jackshit about " love ".

> I tend to self-Isolate with or without reason

> ...I used to test other people whether they can handle me or not, whether they'd leave or not. Not anymore though, but the thought lingers.

> Very- paranoid- about.. perception, neglect and invalidity HAHA.

Mindset: They call it Black and White, or generally just two categories to label my perception of things. However, I try to understand AS MUCH AS I CAN about a situation, etc. See what's in-between before I decide. that's really hard for me to do LOL.

> I always do my best to think and be nice

> I can be so fucking bad at the same time, only to regret it the next second or so

> My mind is scattered all over the place, It's exhausting

Trauma: I have memory problems and a lot to connect with that. Hate and fear is what I'm accustomed to. I live with a fuck ton of active predicaments like hell. Old wounds keeps reopening, and new ones never closes.

Impulse: shows in speech more than in action (THANK GOD LMAO I'D DIE IF I LET MY INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS WIN)

Habits: uhm. Ranging from sunshine and rainbows to SELF-DESTRUCTIVE. I get obsessive, like.. really obsessive.

Coping mechanisms: Usually I have mood stabilizers and anti-depressants n shit, but I don't rely on them anymore (bc I can't keep buying). I don't have good coping mechanisms even for physical needs. It's so bad bro. So I just end up drawing. that's the only good one I can list.

Living with it: Exhausting and an internal war 24/7. Does it affect me physically? Yes. Does it come with other mental factors and conditions? Also yes! But as one of God's most tired soldiers, nothing I can do but keep walking.

What I'm confused about: dawg last time, i kept searching about how conditions co exists like— Thats normal?? N the last diagnosis I was in confirms it does and nothing to worry about. BLUD I AM DEF WORRYING. Autism n bpd? u mean my behavior and shit isnt meant to be invalid as most people perceive — u mean these fckass experiences built that bpd? ☠️ WHAT AM I THEN—

(I'm having a hard time believing it bc as an adult, it's harder to process information like these)

[honeytonedhottie]

how to stop being toxic⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⭐️

the point of this post in general is a reminder to be self aware so that then u can become an individual that u are proud of ✨

SELF AWARENESS ;

everyone has traits in themselves that they aren't necessarily proud of and thats okay. its only natural bcuz we are humans. whats important is that u are able to acknowledge it and work on it.

toxic traits and behaviors stem from things like our own insecurities, conditioning, our egos and a multitude of other things. when we aren't toxic we free ourselves up for better people and experiences.

SELF ASSESSMENT ACTIVITY ;

do some shadow work, dig deeper and do some journalling to rly assess some of ur personality traits whether u classify them as a negative or a positive trait. some examples of traits include

having trouble taking accountability (shifting blame)

once you've classified that trait, write a sentence that explains why that particular trait is/isnt toxic. so for this particular trait ur sentence could look something like

trouble with taking accountability for myself and my actions is a toxic trait because it displays my inability to be responsible for myself/admit fault. this can jeopardize relationships and opportunities for me, it can also hinder my growth as an individual.

just because you notice toxic behaviors within yourself, it doesn't mean that u are a bad person. in fact, since u can acknowledge it and wanna improve it, that shows that u are a good person.

HOW TO ACTUALLY STOP ;

look for the source of toxic behaviors that u display. some ways that can help u to identify what makes u act in that way is by seeing a therapist who can help u to dissect and understand urself, intentional journalling etc.

when u find urself in situations in which u think that ur being toxic, u can practice mindfulness and nip it in the bud. the more that u practice doing this the easier and more natural it'll feel.

be a good listener

show urself compassion

start journalling/going to therapy

listen to feedback

listen to feedback from others from an impartial view. dont take criticism or negative feedback personally. take the feedback that u get and apply it cuz thats one of the many ways u can grow.

[year2000electronics]

And of course Super Paper Mario and 4. Convince me to give this game another try perhaps :]

4. …why you should choose to check out the world of this story and choose three gifs that should underline my point.

NOTE: i will be forgoing the GIF part and using pictures instead because every single GIF search result has been clogged up with mouth-breathers on the internet who have been arguing over whether SPM is good or bad and have been doing it in GIF form for years. don't believe me? search "super paper mario" on discord's gif search. you'll see it. you always see it.

oh jesus. see the thing about liking super paper mario is that there's a lot of SPM fans out there who really like the game but can't really connect a very important dot as to Why they like the game. (HINT: THEY PLAYED IT WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG AND ARE NOSTALGIC FOR IT SO THE FLAWS IT HAS IS WAY LESS FOR THEM, AND BY PROXY, ME.) IM self aware. i will never be able to hate the game, but i am incredibly aware that the gameplay can be fairly lacking sometimes. if the story doesnt already grip you, it probably wont ever be worth it to go through the gameplay. thats my bit. thats my piece.

(but then youll have people who see how SPM defenders dont like to critique it when it deserves to be critiqued and start going after stuff like "oh the story isnt even that good"? MAN WHY DID YOU BRING THE STORY INTO THIS.)

but i digress. the life of a paper mario fan is a long and hard one.

POINT THE FIRST. MARIO'S "EXPERIMENTAL" ERA.

you can argue that ttyd also fits this bill, and i think it does, but this is about SPM so im focusing on that. if the mario series has never really Gripped you or you havent really been a lifelong fan, i always think the gamecube-wii era of mario has been one of its more interesting moments. the switch renaissance has allowed a breath of creativity to come back into mario, and mario's allowed to be Weird again, but gamecube-wii mario is weird in a really SCUFFED way and i love it. the gamecube's flagship mario game was a LUIGI game where he cant even jump. super paper mario came out before mario galaxy or NSMBwii. that was our mario rep on the wii for a while. mario games get a little crazy, a little weird here. and so what you get is a more melancholic story about the end of all worlds, and exploring what it really means to be a hero, and the closest many games will get to acknowledging that the mario characters can have emotions that arent Perfect. its just such a fascinating era for such a perfectly-marketable franchise and i adore it. it's a testament to what mario can Be, for me. Mario Is Weird. say it with me now!

POINT THE SECOND. GOODBYE TO A WORLD.

i just really like the theme of All Worlds Coming To An End. usually in these sort of things, it's "save the world so the world doesnt end!" but in this game, it really feels like "the world is ending and you have to fight even to have a chance to succeed". it colours the tone of the game in such a fantastic way. many songs in the OST have a ticking clock in them. the inescapable void is even in the hub world. it's like the majora's mask of paper mario. many people talk this up but the fact that in chapter 6, you're beholden to the traditions of a silly king who REFUSES to believe the world is ending even when HIS ENTIRE SKY IS PURPLE, and youre trying so hard to beat this 100-man duel faster and faster, only for the world to end and then youre forced to go back into the chapter and see this GRAVEYARD. it makes it so much more tangible. THIS is what will happen if you fail. and this overhanging melancholy paints the themes of love so much stronger. it's not just a love story, it's a love story in adversity. love conquers all, but what is the "all" in question? well, this. bleakness. sometimes the bleakness is part of the love. sometimes you make a sacrifice in the name of love, and nobody likes it, but you know it must be. the whole game is actually a love story between bleck and tippi and it just grips me so. it's such a multi-faceted depiction of love and loss that it feels so much more real to me, that love isn't always the Magical Solution. love is a sword, a shield, a prayer, a wish, a curse, a blessing, an order, an act of cowardice, an act of bravery, a sacrifice.

(you see what i mean? i can literally only be talking like this because i grew up with this stupid ass game)

POINT THE THIRD. FUCK ALL THAT THOUGH LET'S TALK ABOUT THE BLECK MINIONS.

so, the whole kind of crux of this game is that it's a love story between bleck, the main antagonist, and tippi, your companion, right. if you can't flesh both of them out you're in a bad way. obviously for tippi, she's hanging around you all the time, and you get to hear her journey play out throughout the entire game. BUT WHAT OF BLECK? HE'S HIDING IN HIS CASTLE! how are we supposed to know more about him and learn his story if he is IN HIS CASTLE? well that's why after every chapter, there's this interlude where we CHECK UP ON THE BAD GUYS.

i blame this game entirely for my love of villains. this gang of baddies has so much quirks and personality that i find it hard NOT to love them. they're not just gormless minions of the count- each shows their own personality in their relationship with him. mimi has a puppy-love crush on him, o'chunks has a sort of warrior's bond with him, nastasia pledges herself to him and almost uses the minions she controls as a conduit for her dedication to him, dimentio is like a cat in a bird store, and mr l clearly isnt supposed to be here but i dont think he knows that. the minions bicker amongst themselves but clearly have a bond of cameraderie because it all feels like teasing of people who've known each other for a long time.

you fight each minion at least twice, and even though the lackluster gameplay kinda comes in full force again, you get to see so much PERSONALITY in these guys. mimi is super-bratty but seems to know most people would see her as a monster so leans into it, dimentio is playful and jovial while also having his own motives, o'chunks is bold and brash but asks you to finish him off the second time he fails, mr. l is cocky to a fault and reeks of insecurity. i just love having these guys we can always check up on. it's like lord crump but MOOOOORE.

and through a combo of you inferring things about these people and some of the Deeper Lore (flopside bar stories), you kinda come to learn that these minions were kinda manipulated by bleck when they were at their lowest. mimi is a failed creation of SOMETHING. o'chunks' men all died because there was a traitor in his midst. nastasia was saved from a cage by bleck. and the more you learn about bleck the more you see that he is a man grieving the woman he loved, apathetically trying to end all worlds so the pain would end. he lies to the minion, he says he aims to make perfect new worlds, and they believe him, and they love him, because he saved them.

this sort of birth of a relationship through bleck's pain and manipulation comes through by the end, as the love the minions have for bleck is a KEY part of the final act. and idk it's a bunch of deeply-hurting misfits binding together and accidentally finding love in a world they found loveless. i think thats really cool. i think THEYRE really cool. such an awesome cast of villains.

but yknow. again. this is my childhood game. the special feeling i have for it can't really just be put into words. it's my diamond in the rough and nothing can really change that. it's Home.

[imustbenuts]

nuts reading trigun in japanese 7 - filial piety, and meryl

my alternate readings/translation/interpretation of jp lines are for triangulation purposes and nothing else.

ch 10-12. a more general scattershot of a post than over analyzing the japanese texts this time round. i think meryl in these 3 chapters is the most interesting character for me. but mainly bc she seems to be carrying a baggage: her struggle with filial piety.

^OH's version

ソレが普通ですわよ That'd be the most common sense thing to do. それにもともと家訓からして『自立せよ』ですからね But our house's motto is to first be independent above all. ドライといえばドライなのかも Mine would just be dry beyond dry...

me: hm. an office lady in the context of being written in 1990s by a japanese guy. i understand.

(i actually prefer OH's version bc the implications of what shes saying is the exact same, but more importantly leads into this page)

いきついて見れば When I realized all that 何か大切なものを忘れてるのかも… Realized that perhaps I've forgotten something (filial piety) so important... 私… I...

(you can see how this raw translation fucking sucks. I'd reword it in a way that's along the lines of 'feeling so ashamed as to forget getting angry', but OH's version is a downright banger. 11/10 the implications of what she feels is still the exact same. love it a lot!)

right so.

filial piety.

filial piety for a lot of asians is... kind of hard to break down. but perhaps can be explained as "abandoning ones' parents is the worst sin one can do".

not being filial is an invitation to the most extreme judgement from relatives and outsiders in a society which upholds it as the absolute virtue. at least, for the most part. (late stage capitalism fucked it all up yayy)

abandonment can be in the form of presence and/or financial. if a child doesnt make bank to pay back for their parents raising them up, they're not filial. if a child is absent and not there to take care of their parent, thats not filial.

and not being grateful, not being filial, equals shame and warrants divine punishment. (check out folklores like momotaro and kaguyahime that touches on these themes)

meryl i think struggles with that bc shes likely an only child who is expected to work an office job after studying super hard for it, and is now living independently away from her parents. meaning, she is technically not present to take care of them, which in this context makes her feel immensely guilty.

to make matters worse, it sounds like shes one of those types where her parents possibly had to work a lot to pay for this and that, resulting in a severe lack of communication. so this compounds, and she can only write dry stuff in her mind.

milly, by the way, does not have this problem as much:

she has a lot of siblings who can shoulder the weight of it all together, so in terms of that filial piety stress shes not doing so bad.

Badwick, the focus of this arc, by the way, faces the same struggles with meryl:

i mentioned the financial part bc from how chill the parents are with him, i think its possible he was trying to sell the land for large sums of money for his parents to retire. theres an added level of resentment going on that complicates their dynamic, with a dead brother and a land that means too much to sell for any sum of money.

and also his parents are... too nice and understanding, jeez.

i dont think meryl has the resentment. i think her case was similar in that her parents worked hard to provide and kinda neglected her in the connection part.

ofc this might then bring up the question of, 'isnt filial piety kinda transactional?', and, yeah. it... frankly can be. some parents have weaponized it, knowing that a society which forces unconditional love and financial support from a child is a good retirement plan. and it sucks. nightow must have realized this and sidestepped it.

whether bc it will not be well received by the then jp audience or if he just doesnt want to tell a story about this, i dont know. there could also be the fact that the 90s was a bad time to be talking about securing retirement for parents when the economy was circling the drain.

trigun gets dark later. we are getting love and peace above all else, at least for now.

...hm something seems to be rising over the horizon. but we can deal with that later. domestic violence

also i think vash is the kind who would also be a filial son to rem. this aspect of him is just lurking silently in the background in hindsight. in a barrel.

(incidentally i think this is also why luida and brad got promoted to surrogate parents position in stampede. much to ponder ponder...)

[barkly-523]

About Dutch van der Linde

Hello tumblr rdr space! I do not go here, but I post on tiktok sometimes and have a dear buddy of mine who ive been talking to about some posts on here!

I will post a proper introduction at a later date, but for now I would like to put my own two cents in on some stuff ive been seeing recently, about Dutch.

Dutch is an incredibly COMPLEX character, and I feel that some people really horrifically miss that point sometimes. whether it be "Oh, he bonked his head!" or "Oh, this man is a monster!" both points are on opposite ends of the spectrum, but I believe they greatly miss the overarching theme of his character and who he is, and was, as a person. To merely dismiss all of his actions by saying "oh, hes just a monster, abuser, groomer, thats why hes the way that he is" shows nothing above a surface level understanding of his character, nor the characters of the people around him and those who choose to work with him. These characters were designed to have depth, to be studied, and understood on a deeper level. Why take such a basic explanation? I am not here to say Dutch is not without flaws (because he has alot of those), but I AM here to say that calling dutch a "groomer" or some sort of "cult leader, master manipulator" is just, factually incorrect.

Firstly, with the grooming point. This is an incredibly stigmatized word nowadays, so its crazy to use in general here, but by no means were people "groomed" into being outlaws. These people had flaws of their own, took bad paths, and ended up crossing paths with Dutch. Why did they cross paths with him? Well, I went through every "how they joined the gang" story I could find, and its about a 50/50 split between they tried to rob or kill dutch, Or that they were on the run and dutch gave them a safe place to stay, with some exceptions. The odds of these people bumping into someone far worse, in all cases, are exceptional. Most of the gang were in bad places when dutch found them, and they were getting desperate. Its incredibly possible they wouldve bumped into someone who wouldve killed them instead. John was saved from being hanged. Had Dutch and Hosea not been there, he wouldve died. Arthur outright says "dutch saved me, saved most of us." and although things did not turn out right at the end of the day, to believe that dutch was nothing more than a power-hungry manipulator is shown to be incorrect in the media itself. Colm exists. Hes literally right there. An antagonist who; doesnt know the names of the men in his gang, is shown to hit Kieran, who cares more for numbers than connection. Their feud goes back YEARS, and it all seems to stem from a fatal disagreement about how things were being run. When they split paths, Dutch keeps a tight knit gang of people who he considers family, Colm continues to grow his gang in numbers. At the very start of the game, dutch makes it clear that hed prefer the gang doesnt split up, that they stick together so *he can be sure everyone is okay.* He shows sympathy for Sadies situation, and takes her in to help her. Not once is it stated shes obligated to be there, in fact, its stated that she can stay as long as she needs to, to get back on her feet. She has the final say on whether she stays in the gang or not. The reason so many people stayed in the gang until it was actively collapsing, is not because dutch was forcing them to stay. They saw him as family just as he saw them.

Its why his character arc is so interesting. Its why watching his downfall is impactful. he ISNT a bad man, he does bad things out of desperation towards the end of the game, just as other gang members did in the very beginning. Dutch had bad tendencies, but he had people there to help him stay on the right track. His beliefs were good, its why he had people who stuck with him. They believed in what he taught. He had incredibly intelligent people in his gang, I'll use Lenny and Hosea as my examples for now. Lenny was taught by his father to judge peoples character, and even if his time with the gang was short he absolutely wouldve picked up on dutchs behavior if he was hiding behind some sort of mask. and HOSEA, has been with the dude for 20 YEARS. You cannot fake something for that long, and hosea is far from stupid aswell. He is a conman by nature. If dutch was trying to con everyone, surely he wouldve noticed. Arthur still regards dutch incredibly highly for a good majority of the game. He sees the man as a mentor and is clearly deeply affected watching dutch spiral and do bad things as the game goes on. At the beginning, when told Dutch had shot a girl on the blackwater job, his first response is to say that it "doesnt sound like him". Dutch is shown to have remorse for his actions, although he chooses to rarely talk about blackwater, and avoids the subject when its brought up, he explains to hosea, with shame, that he "really messed up" in blackwater. Micah had egged dutch on (as stated by John in a camp interaction) and dutch is shown to be regretful, that job really put everything in motion, but I truly believe micahs manipulation is what changed dutch.

Micah fed into his impulsive side, and tried to reassure him when things went wrong. When Arthur was kidnapped by Colm, Micah explained that Arthur was the type to wander, and surely, theyd see him back at camp. Dutch, ONCE AGAIN, shows regret. He shouldnt have put Arthur in such a position, and knows it. Dutch has impulsive tendencies, he has paranoid thoughts. This is shown in multiple camp interactions and even stated in one of the games first journal entries about the land they were going to settle on before the ferry job. To simply blow off all the depth of his character by saying "oh, hes bad" is so,, lame? Why focus on dutch specifically to say he did all of these bad things on his own accord when micah is, right there. Dutch literally goes crawling back to him in the epilogue. Partly for revenge, since seeing arthur on the cliffside was able to briefly break him out of the funk hed been in for the last few months (albeit far too late), but also partly because I dont think he knows how to be alone. I dont think he can handle it. Hosea and Arthur had been by his side the longest, and he had to watch both of them die. Late game conversations between dutch and arthur have always been fascinating to me, and even in Guarma dutch is still set on going back to keep the gang together. Thats his family, and he cannot lose them too. He outright states he'll do whatever it takes to make sure they survive. Arthur is startled by this, as dutch has been shown to be deadly and irrational, he isnt processing things well, and cannot handle the pressure on his shoulders, and it certainly doesnt help that Micah is in his ear telling him that Arthur and John are betraying him. He clearly doesnt want to believe it, but he cannot wrap his head around hoseas death, and assumes that the only way it couldve happened was if someone ratted, completely overlooking micah.

Dutch is not a smart man, and truthfully, he should have never been in a position of power, but he is not evil. He was desperate, and he was trying to keep his family together. Although I do not agree with the "Trolley Theory" for reasons stated above, I highly doubt him bashing his head like that helped with his mental state either. Dutch is desperate. Dutch does bad things, but he is far from a bad man. He helped the people in his gang, and although the found family turned sour in the end, they mattered to him, and it mattered to the gang. Dutch, CANONICALLY, was not always "bad" either. Arthur, Dutch, and Hosea robbed a bank, took what they needed, and gave the rest to the local orphanage. Dutch scolded Arthur for robbing someone who was "too poor" and said that doing that made them just as bad as the system they were fighting against, Dutch helped Hosea get on the right track and stopped him from stealing just about anything he could get his hands on. Dutch is a man who had good ideologies, and wanted to help people in his own way, but the pressures kept adding up and it broke him. Dutch, in RDR1, is a more objectively "bad" character, But look at how they fleshed him out in rdr2. Was the cliff scene nearly as impactful before the release of rdr2? absolutely not! Playing as john, we were thrown in with a baseline knowledge of their history, and now knowing the full story makes the cliff scene quite the harrowing experience if youre able to grasp the intricacies of dutchs character, to look at him as more than "just a villain".

This turned out to be far more ranty then I wanted, but I am so tired of seeing so much mischaracterization and demonization of a character with literally days worth of content to look at and study that shows some of the points I see from people to just be blatantly wrong. Lol

[tauforged]

Do you have any tips/tricks on getting into warframe? I want to play bc the designs look cool and I'm sure the story is just as interesting!

(It is completely OK to info-dump!)

OH BOY OH BOY!!!!!!!!

ive probably said it better before, but cant find the posts because this website has the worst search function known to all mankind -_- so i will give you some bullet points that will not be all inclusive and i invite anyone else who wants to chime in to do so!!

while the devs are definitely trying to streamline new player experience, the story is uh. a lot! the game has like, what, 11yrs worth of content behind it by now? there's a lot! depending on your playstyle and how you progress through the game, it might take you a while to really get into the meat of it -- or you might speedrun all the main storylines in like a month. there are lots of side quests and secondary objectives you can dick around with as much as you like, which some people find fun and some people find annoying. i liek it :) but it can definitely be a lot

there have been a lot of time limited events and hidden lore entries that make some things pretty inaccessible to new players. they seem to be trying to get better about this but its still not ideal. the wiki is not always right (afaik, theyre still hung up on whether or not albrecht and loid were ~canonically~ together, which is literally just blatantly textual) but it can be a good place to find summaries of shit you've missed out on. ive never watched a single one of those 'warframe lore explained' videos so i cannot vouch for any of their accuracy. i dont really pay attention to the subreddit or the official forums either, but those might have information too? idk

i personally find that some of the quests are thrown at you wayyyyy earlier than they should -- heart of deimos is one that i strongly believe should be way more lategame than it is, since it builds on a lot of stuff that you probably won't know by the time you get to it unless youve been paying veryvery close attention or have been going wiki spelunking. i wouldnt stress about it too much if something seems to make no fucking sense, though. most quests are replayable if you want to go back to something with fresh eyes or different context

i have probably already spoiled you on a lot of the lategame stuff and for that im sorry! lmao this isnt really a game where spoilers will ruin something per se, but since ive been playing the game since like 2013 i went into everything blind as it was released and i always had a huge blast when the game dropped a bombshell on us, so i try not to rob anyone of that experience if i can help it -- not a huge deal though depending on preference

there's a lot of grinding and farming. i personally dont find it overly tedious as there's a lot to do and it's easy to mix things up and take breaks, but for some people it's a huge turn off, so just a heads up i guess. you can technically bypass a lot of the grind by buying new frames or weapons off the market if you really want to spend your money on that, but there's some things that are locked behind a reputation grind and such. and honestly, you dont Need to spend money on anything but some cosmetics

trying to play through everything solo might be fun if you enjoy a challenge, but i personally find it to be unsustainable. you're going to want to find a decent sized clan and you're going to want to either find friends to play with or hit up the recruiting chat for backup.

you can make platinum pretty easy by farming prime parts or rare mods and other such tradeable things and selling them to other players. i dont bother with this because im bad at keeping up on video game economies and it never interested me. but it makes being a 100% f2p player a lot easier when you need to buy inventory slots and such

there are over 50 warframes and countless ways to mod each one, and an absurd amount of different weapons -- there isnt really any one playstyle thats 'better' than any other. i perosnally pay next to no attention to the meta outside of keeping in mind what damage types are effective against which enemies. some people really enjoy minmaxxing the hell out of their shit. you can kinda just do whatever

don't buy plat without having at least a 50% discount login bonus unless it is an absolute emergency. the discounts are random but ive found they happen often enough that i can just wait around for one to pop up and replenish if i'm low. or dont bother idk i cant tell you how to spend your money im not your dad

mute region chat for the sake of your own sanity. nobody in there is as funny as they think they are. moderation is better in there than it used to be but it's still a wasteland

the most important part of playing warframe is having fun and being yourself :)