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Sleeping Beauty AU where the princess was born on a Leap Day, so when the evil fairy curses her to prick her finger “on her 16th birthday”, her family realizes that’s not the same thing as her 16th year of life and she’ll actually be in her 60′s when it happens.

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Like to charge, reblog to cast

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Title: So Glad (I stuck around)

Author(s): @chiayhorchata

Artist: @xpyne & @thepossumcore 

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: Suicidal Thoughts, Canon Typical Violence, Temporary Character Death

Word Count: 13k

Posting Date: Friday, October 25th 

Summary: Wade Wilson is aware of who and what he is. Thank you very much. 

He knows he is issues upon issues all wrapped up in the nastiest package anyone has ever seen, he's a violent, suicidal mess, he's unlovable and destroys everything and everyone he touches. He knows he used up all of his good luck when Spider-Man allowed him to follow along for his patrols and dried up the well when Peter became his friend.

So, forgive him if he's a little shocked when Peter asks him out on a date, a real, totally serious, no joking, romantic date. He's a lot more shocked when the hero actually wants a romantic relationship with the mercenary.

It seems that Peter Parker is determined to prove Wade wrong on everything he believes about himself. Fuck.

Teaser Excerpt (under the cut):

“For…me? Like, me, me?” Wade took the offered flowers, looking down at the beautiful arrangement, squeezing the bouquet just a little tighter when a treacherous voice in his head suggested Not for you. It's a joke. He'll take them away and have a good laugh about it. 

“Of course! Beautiful flowers for a beautiful man.” Wade nearly blacked out at that. Peter couldn't be for real, he couldn't actually be laying on the charm like this for someone as gross as Wade. The notion was ridiculous and unthinkable and- “They're camellias.” 

“Huh.” Wade turned around, without taking his eyes off the bouquet, not wanting to lose sight of it lest it disappeared, he walked to his kitchen, leaving Peter to poke his head in so he could follow the merc with his eyes. 

He blindly opened his kitchen cabinet, feeling around for the biggest glass he owned, a chipped beer mug he had stolen from Weasel once upon a time, that had a now almost invisible Corona logo, definitely not something that deserved to have the beautiful flowers placed in it, but it would have to do.

Filling it with water before placing it on the counter and slowly, gently as he could placing the flowers in, making sure the stems didn't bend on the way in and the bow was out of the water. 

“Looks great, big guy.”

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This is the magic lucky word count. Reblog for creativity juice. It might even work, who knows.

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Proud snail owners when their snails:

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What if Ben told Peter "with great strength comes great responsibility" because he thought Peter was struggling with the sudden appearance of mutant powers and didn't want him to fall down the "Magneto is right" pipeline?

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Today, on this fateful day in sex ed, I have to teach 25 9th graders how to put condoms on wooden dicks without losing my composure. Wish me luck lmao

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the problem with not having watched anime growing up is that when I watch anime now I am suddenly assaulted with psychic blasts in which I recognize the source for all mannerisms and aesthetics of my peers

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had a fascinating dream last night where there was a new, virally popular trading card game - it was called MOUNTAIN (stylised in all caps) and the whole gimmick was that you couldn’t buy boosters or anything - you had to find them?

nowhere sold MOUNTAIN - I mean, I expect players did, once cards were in their hands.

but acquiring cards meant noticing a box lying around, and just….nabbing it? they’d be in weird places - in a skip, wedged high up in a fence, nestled in the branches of a tree? nobody ever saw who left them there, and there was a lot of debate about how MOUNTAIN boxes were sometimes hard to acquire without risking one’s physical safety - but then, that was also bragging rights. especially as harder-to-reach boxes seemed to contain more elusive and sought after cards…

no, I don’t remember anything about the actual gameplay, we never played any MOUNTAIN. alas. I know there were “frame cards” that were literally transparent but for a fancy metallic or holographic border, which I guess upgraded the card they were applied to? frames were super rare, my coworker literally ran up to me in the pub purely to show off the frame he’d just found

dream brain gimme the deets on MOUNTAIN’s actual mechanics, I’m invested in this controversial unpurchasable scavenger hunt game

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I understand that museums have to be dark because light can destroy fragile artifacts. That said, I’m always afraid to walk around the blind corners because what if there is a skeleton

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This is what Rasputin would've wanted.

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Literal definition of spyware:

Also From Microsoft’s own FAQ: "Note that Recall does not perform content moderation. It will not hide information such as passwords or financial account numbers. 🤡

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loudly going "YOU'RE GOOD YOU'RE GOOD" to myself to ward off the memory of every embarrassing thing i've ever done

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"Fine, I guess you are my little PogChamp. C'mere"

~ Joel, probably

solo things cause procreate rescaling butchered the quality 😔: