#when ur safe food betrays you

[k1rby-enjoyer]

i yipee and then i nauur

[have-you-seen-my-sanity]

Hello! :3 I see ure writing yandere and for inho and with my current obsession over the front man/hwang inho im asking if you can do yandere front man? Pls do it as dark as possible 🙏

Did I read dark? Absolutely!

Yandere Hwang In-ho/Frontman

Squid Game masterlist

Nsfw and dead dove do not eat below.

At first his focus was towards Gi-hun, but when you were part of their team, sat with them, talking to him, his focus slowly but surely shifted to you.

In-ho would silently root for you without letting his front man mask slip.

The guards will give you food that has been only reserved for you during mealtime. Suddenly your ration has the type of food you like, an extra egg or more rice, but most importantly the nutrisions you'd need for the next game.

In-ho is the reason a random player has been shot instead of you, he is the reason the guards have escorted you to the bathroom as another lights out fight happened.

Hwang hears everything you say, whether it's during eating or when he's laying awake in his bed, listening to you speaking with someone.

He's too good of a manipulator, tells you to listen to him instead of the former winner Gi-hun, tells you to stay close to him instead anybody else.

"Why go with Gi-hun and risk getting killed when you can stay with me where you'd be safe?"

In-ho watches you from the corner of his eyes, his knuckles turning white when he sees another Thanos-like douchebag confronting you.

He has absolutely no trouble beating someone bloody who dared flirting with you or touching you without consent. Could easily snap that person's neck without a flinch.

In-ho gets sick pleasure when he sees someone you've got close with get gunned down by the guards. You look so pretty to him, no matter if you're crying or not..

If a raid against the guards happens, Hwang watches you like a hawk, making sure you're not getting harmed and you're not getting away. His stares would be so intense he is sure you would feel them burn through you.

During a raid, he couldn't be happier because whatever happens he knows you will be captured, either by his guards or directly him after faking his death.

He already plans what he would do with you once you've been captured, he would make you watch the games with him, all in his front man attire of course.

Forces you to watch the guards gun down the ones you became friends with, telling you:

"See what happens to those you call friends? The money makes them your friends until they're getting it and betray you..."

Has planned to keep you in his chambers while observing the games, having his right hand man, the Officer, keeping tabs on you.

Hwang will reveal himself to you soon, expecting your eyes widen in fear, shock or hopelessness.

In-ho would personally implant a tracker into you, making sure he always knows where you are, this way you have almost no way of getting rid of him.

In-ho keeps you exclusively to himself, not even the VIPs are allowed near you. He has his moments where he treats you more like his trophy, squeezing your thighs possessively with his cold leather glove.

"You are by far the most beautiful price. But I get to keep you, you're my perfect price.."

In-ho is rich as hell, so there is no doubt he will spoil you with it.

Any rogue guard trying to lay his hands on you gets his lesson taught with a bullet in his brain for touching his perfect price.

Hwang may seem cold to his staff, but with you he isn't. He's the man whispering sweet nothings into your ear until you're too weak to stand.

If you're trying to escape however... that is if you somehow make it past the guards, In-ho can get harsh with you too.

"Trying to escape are we? Perhaps you need a reminder of who you belong to now, hm?"

His favorite is having you on his lap, with his cock stuffed into you while he watches the games. You're not allowed to move until he says so, you're not allowed to cum until he says so, you're not allowed to make noise until he says so.

Your best bet with him is behaving and doing what he says.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

[lowkeyrobin]

hey i lit love your fics! could i request a maze runner boys reacting to readers death hcs? tysm!

ooo okay I can definitely do this!!! ; and tysm!!! I appreciate it 🫶🫶🫶 ; thanks for requesting, hope you enjoy!

TMR BOYS ; your death

includes ; newt, minho, aris, frypan & gally

warnings ; language, death, guns, murder, unplanned suicide missions (?), mentions of hostaging

masterlist

NEWT

you were in the maze together and knew each other far longer than that, you just didn't know

but you were tight tight and each other's person, really

twas until the right arm

you got shot

during the betrayal and raid on the right arm, you get hit, bad

so after witnessing minho get kidnapped and teresa betray everyone, you fucking die

and it BREAKS newt

omfg

this man loses it

he's officially focused on getting minho back to try and avenge you or do something right in your memory

his grief for people he loves, who he keeps very close, transcends anything

he would've died for you and he did die trying to make your death worth something

at least you're together again like god damn

MINHO

you died jumping / falling out a window in the last city

grotesque, yes, but you couldn't let janson kill thomas and/or teresa

it was during that final fight where he was cranking out while the world was ablaze, while thomas was wounded and teresa was weak out of exhaustion and fear

you were up there because you were trying to save thomas / go after him and get him on the berg

you tackled janson at the first possible moment you could, and it was a struggle because he was gaining new strength cause he was cranking out

and you went to push him out the window, he grabbed your jacket, and he pulled you with him into the flames

minho, seeing the pair on the roof without you, broke down sobbing

he held up a moment for thomas, but once they were a minute or two into the clear, he lost it

he'd lost newt, and now he'd lost you and he couldn't even see you, even dead

he was grieving for so long, yk damn well he put ur name on that stupid rock, some where near the top because you took down janson

ARIS

twas in the maze when you died 😔

aris didn't know you all that long but he felt a deeper connection with you

not a rachel and aris telepathic way, but... different, a yearning almost

it was during the escape where you died

you sacrificed yourself like the true hero you were for him

he would've been griever food if it weren't for you :(

yk damn well he mentioned you 24/7 to his new friends and that he only survived cause of his friend y/n

and you know DAMN WELL he put your name on that stupid rock

he spent HOURS carving it cause it took him so much emotional prep

he never got to really mourn your death, so with the storm over and now within the calm, he's able to mourn now, and it's like 50x worse than what it would've been if he could've had a moment prior

I hc that he's a writer so I think he writes poems about his grief and emotional instability

FRYPAN

upon arrival at the "totally not wckd" shelter, you were taken kind of soon to the safe haven

you were confused and surprised cause you'd only been there a few days, but he and the others ushered you along, promising they'd see you on the other side soon

he literally ushered you to your death bro

and he'll never forget that

during the break out, they ran past the room where you were being held and got a glimpse of you hooked up to machines and shit

BROKE HIM BRO

he wanted to go back and get you but there just wasn't time

he'll never stop blaming himself because in a moment where he could've protected you, he didn't

everything he does is in your memory in his mind

his mentality is just 'survive' so he's surviving for you, he's making it to the real safe haven , for you

GALLY

you knew gally cause you were working for the same rebellion group for like a year

you end up dying during the revolution thing, being crushed by falling buildings, shot at, burned to a crisp

yeah it was rough

you were with gally and his friends most the time, but had to go back and help a few stray kids the rebels took as hostages?? they were just doing their own thing

so you go back for them and usher them toward where the others were with the berg

you got caught up in the battle and duck behind a car, walkie in hand, communicating with call signals to gally

you basically told him you might not make it, for him to not look for you and to look out for the kids you sent their way

he's bombarding you with questions wirh no answer, and he goes out to look for you

he's pulled back to the main mission and from the low flying berg, he sees you get lost in the crossfire and dissapear into rubble

shit is roughhh

he's biting back tears and he's lowkey gaslit himself into thinking you're still alive to cope

to this day he thinks a handful of you rebels survived and you're out there somewhere, maybe looking for him

[yeagerfate]

their love languages.

characters: miles morales (earth-1610), gwen stacy, hobie brown, pavitr prabhakar, miguel o’hara

warnings: none! just fluff <3

notes: thank you guys so much for all the love on my previous posts! i have so much fun when i write these so i will definitely be posting some more soon. enjoy ur food lol

MILES MORALES

Miles’ love language is QUALITY TIME. He always wants to spend time with you and is definitely an “experience” rather than “materialistic gift” type of person. He gets very shy when expressing his love for you verbally, so he does it through quality time. He’ll draw you during study sessions (Unbeknownst to you, he always finishes before you. He just never says anything because he still wants an excuse to hang out with you.), will ask you to play video games with him, and is constantly going skateboarding with you, even if you’re bad at it. He just wants to see you, and is afraid to ask you to just “hang out” because he doesn’t want you to think he’s weird. In return, Miles would like ACTS OF SERVICE. A lot of people have betrayed him and hurt him, so he would really like someone who goes out of their way to help him. To him, it proves how much you care for him, and that’s really important to Miles.

GWEN STACY

Although Gwen can be cold to those she doesn’t trust, once you get to know her, she’s always going out of her way to support you. Her love language is ACTS OF SERVICE. She plays songs for you whenever you want, is always taking care of you when you’re sick, and somehow always knows when you’re upset. Before she comes over, she always gets you your favorite snacks and drinks. Gwen tries her best to look out for you the way she couldn’t for her late friend Peter. She just wants you to be safe, and she asks for nothing in return once you gain her trust. However, Gwen’s face would turn 50 shades of red with a significant other whose love language is WORDS OF AFFIRMATION. She loves it when you tell her how proud of her you are, when you tell her you’ll always be there for her… she’s immediately enamored with you. Oh, and when you tell her how pretty you think she is? She’s on cloud 9.

HOBIE BROWN

Hobie loves GIFT GIVING. Sometimes, when he returns from another mission, he’ll come back with some strange trinkets. They’re always fun to look at, to wonder what other people from other universes think of them. Hobie always makes sure to pick out the ones that you’ll like; it’s the one time he makes an effort to be consistent. A small smirk always appears on his face when he sees you wearing the earrings that he stole from another universe. When you’re going out of your way to make things easier for him, though, he’s a goner. Hobie would really be smitten for someone whose love language is ACTS OF SERVICE. He never blushes, but you’ll see a light shade of violet emerge on his cheeks when he sees that you ran errands for him while he was gone, or when you help him with his hair on wash day. It’s all very sweet.

PAVITR PRABHAKAR

Pav’s favorite way to express his adoration for you is PHYSICAL TOUCH. He loves to hold your hand, cuddle with you (he’s a little spoon), and kiss you on the cheek. Your warmth is one of his favorite sensations. He just likes to know that you’re there. It’s really scary for him to imagine a world where you’re not by his side, so he likes to give you as much affection as possible. He always wants you to know that he loves you. Oh, and if he has a mission soon? You won’t be seen walking around with him not right behind you. He gets super clingy right before he has to leave. On another note, Pav loves receiving homemade GIFTS. He’ll always wear anything that you make him, especially if it’s something for his hair. He’ll definitely brag about it when he travels to the Spider Society.

MIGUEL O’HARA

Miguel is very protective of you, so his love language is PHYSICAL TOUCH. Even if it’s subtle, he always is somehow close to you, whether it’s a hand on your back, a hand holding yours, or both. Miguel has lost almost everything, so he is always seeking out your warmth. However, he is not too fond of PDA unless it’s subtle, so he always keeps his affections elusive. It is also very important to him that his enemies do not find out about you, as his worst nightmare would be them coming after you. You are the very last thing Miguel has; he’d rather die than witness anything happen to you. Miguel would absolutely adore someone whose love language is ACTS OF SERVICE. When he comes back from a mission all banged up, and you volunteer to help him clean up? Suddenly his heart is beating 2x faster than usual and his pupils are dilated.

[iliketangerines]

Do you write for Havik or Rain? I just barely see any fanfics of them and since ur an MK writer, I am taking the chance.

Could you write Earthrealm Champion! Reader with either Havik or Rain? Like some enemies to lovers tension going on... You don't have to write them if you don't want to though, I just wish they had more content.

sweet as wine

a/n: god knows i need more content for the both of them as well.

pairing: rain x afab!reader

warnings: nsfw (MDNI), creampies

Rain didn’t like you all too much

you also had water magic and when you had bested him in kombat because he foolishly believed that a human wouldn’t be able to beat the high mage of outworld…

well, safe to say, he felt humiliated

even more so when you had stuck your tongue out at him like som petty child and then put your hand up and flipped up your middle finger

he wasn’t sure what it meant but judging by Raiden’s disappointed glare, he knew it was some sort of insult

he sits across from you in the dining hall while you chat with the others about something on Earthrealm, and he scoffs at you when you say you had learned some water tricks when you were younger

you glance at him at his sound, but you just shoot him a glare before continuing with how you first learned flashy tricks as a dancer before switching to kombat

the next few days are torture having to sit next to you and listen to your stories

he tries to one-up you with his own stories about the decades he spent learning mastering the art of water magic, and yet you always seem to do better than him

you wielded magic younger, you learned it faster, you fought better with the water than he did, and it infuriated Rain to no end

even worse, he was always stuck next to you because two water magic users theoretically should get along with each other, but Rain held nothing but envy towards you

and yet, despite all that, you were always somewhat cordial with him, letting the smallest hints of frustration shine through when he grumbled something derogatory about Earthrealmers

but, you still stuck by him closely and traveled with him around the palaces and the village outside, and he eventually stopped mumbling insults at you and started seeing who you really were

he couldn’t deny that you were beautiful, especially in the soft glow of the lanterns while smiling at him

you bought him food and desserts from the vendors and asked him to explain it all to you about the food, and he found himself day after day finding joy in watching your face light up when he explained the cultural treats and snacked on them

and then he had gone and betrayed the empire and flooded Seido with water, too blinded by his ambition, and he had come back to court begging for forgiveness and to be punished for his actions

and then you were there, defending him to try and better himself as a person rather than be locked up to rot for the rest of his life

Rain felt his heart thump at the sight of you fighting for him, and he knew he was a goner

he spent his days bettering himself with you by his side, teaching him all the tricks you had learned, and he did the same for you

sometimes, some of the old banter would come back, insults flying at each other, but now it was underlined with a hint of playfulness, a hint of flirting

or maybe it was all in his head

and now, he sat with you on the balcony of the training pits, moon high in the sky, as you both drank some sweet outworld alcohol and regaled each other with tales of learning and failing certain water magic

you laugh as he tells you he had been trying to make a ball of water float over to him when he first learned magic but it had ended with puddles on the floor and a mop to clean it all up

you slap his shoulder and lean in close, not quite believing that the high mage of outworld couldn’t even manage to float a simple ball of water

Rain rolls his eyes, but he can’t help but focus on the way your hand is so warm on his shoulder

he takes another sip of his drink and tells you that you couldn’t have been perfect at wielding magic at first as well, and you smile and giggle

you tell him about how the first time you had wielded water magic, you had gotten mad at your mom for something frivolous and the sink in the kitchen had exploded during your tantrum

Rain doubles over in laughter, and he doesn’t realize how close he is to you until he opens his eyes and finds your face just a few inches from his

your eyes flicker from his eyes to his lips, and his heart thumps in his chest

if he just leaned in a little closer, he would be kissing you

he whispers at you to tell him to stop if you get uncomfortable, and he raises a hand up to cup your face

you lean into the touch, and he dips his head down low to press a soft and quick kiss to your lips

you smile at him when he pulls back and ask with a smirk if that’s all he can do, you would’ve thought a mage with decades more experience would be more bold

Rain rolls his eyes and grabs onto the lapels of your shirt and smashes your lips together

you groan into the kiss and slide into his lap to try and get closer, and Rain presses his tongue into your mouth, desperate to taste all of you

you let him in, and you cup the back of his neck as your hips slowly grind into him

Rain can feel himself getting hard underneath you, and you seem to know it to because your other hand comes down and palms at his dick

he groans and pulls away to admire you

your chest is heaving, your lips are glossy, and your cheeks are flushed from the alcohol and the kiss earlier

Rain asks if you want to go further, and you jump up and drag him to his feet and tell him to take you to his bedroom

he smiles and quickly whisks you away to his bedroom, but it’s not quite so subtle with the way your giggles and his laughs echo in the high palace hallways and how your footsteps stumble all about the marbled floors

but finally, the two of you reach his bedroom, and he leads you to his humble bed

you fall onto the bed on your back, and Rain crawls onto the bed and kisses you again, weight atop of you and pressing his clothed cock into your hips

Rain grinds into you and moans into your mouth while his hands paw at your clothing clumsily, fingers not quite as deft with the alcohol running in his veins

you taste so sweet for him, and you can’t seem to get enough of him either with the way your hands claw at his clothes

the two of you pull apart, and Rain’s not quite sure what to do next honestly

but it seems you’re not too sure either because the two of you just lay on the bed, breaths mingling as your chests heave

Rain asks if you’ve ever done this before, and you let out a sigh of relief and say that you thought you were the only one

you then prop yourself up on your elbows and say you would’ve thought that since he’s so old that he would’ve had at least some experience

he ducks his head as his cheeks warm and says he was too busy focused on his studies to try and get with anyone

you laugh at him and call him a nerd, and he scowls at you

but you stop laughing eventually and wipe away a tear and say let’s take it slow

Rain nods and kisses you sweetly, before you pull away and say to get those damn robes off him, you want to see him in all his glory

he blushes at your lewd words, but when you start undressing as well, revealing your plush chest and toned legs underneath the uniform, Rain hurries to undress as well

the two of you throw your clothes onto the floor, and the both of you trace each other’s bodies with your fingertips

Rain can feel himself getting harder as your hands lightly brush over his arms, his chest, his stomach

and he can feel your impatience as well with the way you squirm underneath his warm hands squeezing your chest and your thighs

he kisses you again, leaning overtop of you, and you wrap your legs around his waist and grind your pussy against his cock

he moans into your mouth at the feeling of your wet pussy sliding against his, and he reaches a hand down to line himself up and push into you

you whine at the stretch and tell him to slow down, you need to adjust

little tears well at the edges of your eyes as you pant, and Rain peppers light little kisses over your face as he stays buried inside of you

he moans into your skin at the feeling of your warm wet cunt around his cock, but he keeps his hips still as he lets you adjust to the stretch

finally, you let out a whimper for him to move, and he gives an experimental thrust

you let out a little whine and throw your head back as you dig your nails into his back, and Rain groans at the feeling of your pussy tightening around him

his thrusts are slow and shallow at first, but as your whine grow needier, Rain’s thrusts gets faster and rougher until he’s fucking into you roughly

his hips make a wet slapping sound as they meet yours and bumps into your clit, sending little stars bursting through your vision

you moan as Rain re-angles his hips and his tip bullies against your sweet spot

your whimpers grow louder, and you scratch angry red lines into Rain’s back as he groans into your ear

you’re so tight and warm for him, and the little pleas you let out as he fucks into you has his mind spinning with pleasure

he captures your lips in a kiss, and you moan into his mouth as your cunt clamps down on him and you cum

Rain whines into your mouth, and his hips stutter as he cums inside of you

he lets his seed empty into your wet pussy and kisses you until you’re both breathless again

finally, he pulls out, and he lays down beside you

you can feel his cum dripping out of you, but you can’t really find it in yourself to care as Rain brings you close to his plush chest

you look up at him, and you can’t help yourself as you tell him that he didn’t do so bad for a old man

Rain scowls down at you and reaches his hand down to give a playful smack to your ass, and you wiggle your eyebrows at him, telling him jokes on him you liked that

Rain smiles and tells you next time, and you laugh and cuddle up next to him

the both of you fall asleep quickly, close together and in each other’s warmth

[aruanimess]

I'd like to know what ur Mikahisu headcanons are

So, uhh, this started out as headcanons and ended up being a micro fic. Sorry about that...

~~~

Their love story begins soon after the Rumbling.

After the final battle, Mikasa is broken. She has lost Eren, she has lost her purpose in life and she left all her friends behind to mark her own path forward. She’s a mess. She meanders from one place to the next, trying to find a way back to Paradis to return Eren’s remains to his final resting place. 

Historia isn’t doing any better. She’s suffering from postpartum depression while dealing with the uprising of the Yeagerists and the unstable political situation Eren’s departure has caused. She has come to question almost every decision she’s made in her life, and most tragically she regrets the birth of her own daughter. After all, she chose to have her to avoid inheriting the Beast and that led to immeasurable devastation and destruction, so how could it have been a sound decision? What’s more, she’s half a child herself and she’s expected to raise another, while her role as a queen is more vital than ever. She’s worried that she’ll end up acting like her own mother, cold and distant and indifferent to her child, so she overcompensates by never letting her daughter out of sight and accepting no help, despite hating herself for bringing her into this world because of a failed and misguided political agenda.  

So when Historia first hears about Mikasa arriving at the island, she sends word for her immediately. “Come to me,” she writes, “I’m desperate for a friendly face.” 

But Mikasa doesn’t come. 

How could she? She has no help to offer, no friendship to extend. She betrayed her oldest friend, and abandoned Armin and the rest in the middle of the desert. No, she’s not strong anymore, she wonders if she ever was… 

She returns to her family’s cabin, which is miraculously unscathed by the Rumbling. She takes it as a sign that this is indeed the right place to be, where everything started. The blood has long dried off the floors and fungi has grown all over the walls and furniture. 

Her new project begins. 

She dusts the place, sands the wood and polishes it, replaces broken windows, shoos away the spiders and mice that have found shelter there, gets new furniture from nearby villages, and generally makes a home for herself. Meanwhile, she fishes in the stream for her own food, staring idly at the wind rustling the grass; she gathers firewood and forages in the forest, the scent of old tree and moist earth in her nostrils; she buys wool from a local shepherd and weaves herself a shaggy rug to dig her toes in on a cold winter.

Without her leave, she heals. 

One crisp morning, on the verge of autumn, she’s peeling an apple in her garden. As she bites into the juicy flesh, she recalls the night after Historia’s coronation—rosy lips wet from cider, delirious laugh, kind blue eyes. Suddenly, she doesn’t remember why she kept her distance. 

She picks up parchment and ink, and composes what she hopes is a heartfelt letter to Historia, explaining where she’s been this whole time and why she hasn’t replied for so long. At the end of the letter, right at the bottom, there’s a hesitant invitation for Historia and her daughter at her place. “But no guards, if you can help it,” she adds. “I have no taste for soldiers, and I can keep you safe enough.”

She seals the letter and sends it on its way, expecting nothing to come of it. 

She’s wrong. 

A fortnight later, Historia appears at her doorstep, cradling a pink, squealing bundle in her arms. “I came as fast as I could,” she says. “I made arrangements. No one knows I’m here.” There are dark circles under her eyes, but her face is flushed with joy. Something tells Mikasa that this is the first time Historia has smiled in a while. 

She ushers the queen inside and settles her in the guest bedroom—Mikasa’s own childhood room. Historia sleeps soundly for the night, cuddling close to her baby, almost like she’s afraid she might lose her. 

For breakfast, Mikasa serves mint tea and butter biscuits she baked herself. Historia eats it all as if it was the rarest delicacy. 

After she’s done, she sighs. “I’m tired, Mikasa. Everything on this island is either ruined or run by Yeagerists. They’ve shut me out. I’ve lost public support. There’s nothing for me to do, but to quit.”

Mikasa is left speechless. Even at her darkest moments, Historia always had the willpower to go on. She never imagined she’d see her so defeated. Not knowing what else to say, she squeezes her hand. Her delicate knuckles are covered with calluses. “Take your time,” she says. And then to change the subject: “What’s her name?” She gestures to the little girl playing on the carpeted floor. 

Historia smiles with some effort. “Maria,” she answers. “For the Survey Corps’ victory.” She pauses and takes a sharp breath. “For our victory.”

Mikasa smiles back. It doesn’t reach her eyes. 

The months pass and with them winter. Historia learns how to make wine and bake apples. She spends her evenings lying on the sofa with her feet bare, resting beneath her, and her sewing project on her lap. She reads books and picks up folk songs and sings them to Maria as lullabies, even though Mikasa insists some of them are too dark for little ears. 

For her part, Mikasa knits tiny hats for the baby and a red shawl for Historia. She gets acquainted with the local doctor, despite the lump that forms in her throat when she thinks about Dr Yeager, just in case Maria catches the flu. She carries the baby in a wrap fastened around her torso and she talks to her while she cleans the cabin. She learns that Historia loves roasted chestnuts and she makes them as often as possible just to see her smile. 

(She promises herself to plant a chestnut tree come spring, and then pauses in shock as she realizes she’s making long term plans that might never come to be.)

Little Maria takes her first step in the cabin, her small chubby feet buried in the shaggy carpet Mikasa made. She learns to sleep through the night and eat solid foods. She says her first word, which is of course ‘mama.’ Only, confusingly, a few weeks later, her mutterings of ‘mama’ get interrupted by a jumbled ‘mi-a’ here and there.

It takes Historia a day to realize she’s trying to say ‘Mikasa.’ It takes Mikasa a little longer. 

Mikasa and Historia share a bed. At first, Mikasa offers to sleep on the sofa, while Historia takes the bed, but after a few days Historia argues that there’s no point in her back developing knots, and that there’s enough space for both of them. It makes sense, in a completely practical way. It’s just for comfort and warmth. And if Mikasa wakes up sometimes with Historia’s arms wrapped around her frame and an insistent desire building in her core, that’s for her to deal with. 

They share clothes as well, and on occasion they bathe with the door open, just in case someone needs the bathroom while it’s occupied. 

Little by little, their feelings shift. 

There are lingering glances and secret smiles and touches that last a moment too long. There are fluttering heartbeats and shy handholding and warmth rising up on cheeks as they speak with each other. Mikasa almost has a fit when Historia cuts her hand while cooking. Historia throws a blanket on Mikasa when she finds her passed out on the couch. They both fuss over each other almost as much as they fuss over Maria. 

Their first kiss comes with the first stirrings of spring. 

The snows have mellowed out around the cabin and the almond tree at the edge of the grove has sprouted its first blossoms. A robin is chirping away at the young rays of dawn. Historia is sitting on the porch, clutching a steaming mug of mint tea in a gloved hand, just like the one she drank on her first morning here. Unlike that first morning, however, her smile is effortless, wide, content. She breathes in the morning breeze and lets her lungs fill with the icy chill. 

Mikasa emerges from the cabin. A warm gust of air escapes from the hearth burning away inside. She drapes the red shawl around Historia’s shoulders. It looks good on her. Soft. She tries not to think of her choice of color, of how she came to associate red with love and affection, and what that choice might mean for her. “It’s still cold out,” she chastices. “Don’t let the robins fool you.”

Historia hands her the mug. It’s a little crooked as she molded it herself from clay, but it does its job and it’s a testament of her ability to create something useful.

Mikasa takes a sip. She tastes mint, honey and Historia. She sighs.

“I know,” says Historia as she watches Mikasa intently. “I wanted to enjoy this for as long as I can.”

Mikasa looks around the semi-frozen grove. “Winter will come again,” she dismisses. “No need to freeze to death.”

Historia smiles sadly. “Yes, but I will not be here next winter.” She laughs at Mikasa’s uncomprehending stare. “Come spring, I’ll leave,” she explains. “It’s high time I assume again my duties to my people, now that I’m able to. There’s much work to be done. I left them helpless long enough as it is.”

There are no words in Mikasa’s mind, only bitter disappointment. “Oh.”

Historia grabs her hand. “Come with me.”

A blink. “Historia… I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“I have no place there…”

“You can come live at the orphanage or at my place. Or I can give you an estate of your own if that’s what you prefer.”

“That’s not what I meant. I have no taste for politics. People will question me, if I show up. The way I left…”

“I’ll protect you!”

“Historia, please… I can’t.”

And Historia knows a rejection when she hears it. She lowers her eyes and wraps the shawl tighter around her body. “All right, if that’s what you want.”

Mikasa’s heart is breaking. She aches like she’s losing a limb seeing Historia so unhappy—Historia, who is about to leave her and take sweet Maria with her. Yet, she can’t return to that place, full to the brim with schemes and machinations and memories of her past. 

But Historia’s eyes are so sad, so dull and disappointed. It feels like history is repeating itself; like she’s back on that dark hill, glimmering lights flickering from the tents below, the wind in her hair, and her love is leaving. 

She opens her mouth. “Historia…” the words die on her lips. Historia looks at her, expectant. “Historia, you…” she stops again, and swallows around her nerves. “Historia... you’re family,” she finishes lamely. 

Before she has any time to curse herself for her foolishness, Historia is upon her. She grabs her by the lapels of her robe, brings her close and smashes their lips together, painfully, violently. 

When they break apart, Historia is beaming. “I’ll come to you then,” she says. “Like I did before. You’ll see! I’ll take Maria and sneak out of the palace and visit you as often as I’m allowed.” Her chest is heaving as she speaks. “And when I deal with those morons who think they can run my country, I’ll appoint a new government and retire here. With you. What do you think?”

Mikasa smiles. It’s a lovely thought. A peaceful life, here, in nature, with Maria and Historia by her side. It sounds like an impossible dream, but damn her if she doesn’t want to believe in it, body, mind and soul. “It sounds perfect,” she says. 

Historia nods, eyes shining with tears and hope. She rises to her tiptoes and kisses Mikasa, deep and long. 

Mikasa tastes mint, honey and Historia.

[thewhumpcaretaker]

i have a seeeeriouuus problem with attention tbqh. like. after reciving tons of attention when it is gone it feels like a sugar crash. like for example if ur my friend and u shared ur food w me (sign of affection) why do you not stay by my side all the time like i do why would you sit with other people instead of talking to me why would you be so confusing

and i know it is ilogical because. someone can't give you attention all the time, can't act like you're the most important thing in their world cuz thats not healthy and people have bad days but it doesn't like. make me feel better! i still feel somewhat betrayed when someone just. doesnt show love 24/7. and yeah it is ilogical but my heart just!! feels that way!!! !!!

and yeah i MIGHT be starving for attention and affection but it DOESN'T make sense because like. i do get attention. i might just be really lonely but i honestly think thats likely just my own fault cuz im very picky with people and well. emotionally paranoid as you can see. no actually just very very very very very Very Dramatic i think.

Point is i just!!! i immediatly set subconcious expectations when people are nice to me and when they do things like. that are unpleasant to me it feels like a backstab even tho ITS NOT and theyre likely not even AWARE i get upset that they like. don't want to get another seat so i can sit with them or just MAKE ME THEIR PRIORITY!!! i actually said outloud "i need a fucking lover maaannn" and they told me it would likely just make my ancient sadness worst and i told them: i need someone who is devoted to me, and they told me, that the way i want to be loved, with every tiny detail i notice being noticed, was impossible.

and it likely likely is!!!! everyone has their own lifes even when people are in a relationship you're not their god!!! and that fucks me up bad in an inexplicable way!!! and yes i likely LIKELY need therapy but i am scared shitless i will get told the truth: that all of my pain and suffefing is MY fault and MY responsability and that the WORLD and PEOPLE are not the problem, it is ME, because even tho i alredy know it, i don't wanna hear it from the mouth of a professional!!!

:(

sorry for flooding ur ask box with vents btw

Some of us want an impossible amount of certain things. For me, as an OCD person, the thing that I want an impossible amount of is reassurance/confirmation/certainty. I want to check that things are okay an infinite number of times. But doing so will not fix the issues I actually want to fix. Wanting an infinite amount of attention is similar: generally, the reason that more and more attention is needed is that you're trying to use it to do something that attention does not actually achieve.

I don't know what it is that you're trying to do with attention, because I don't know you. But maybe you're trying to rewrite a time when you weren't given attention in the past, to change the past itself. Maybe you're trying to feel worthwhile. Maybe you're trying to feel safe. Maybe something different. But none of these goals can be achieved (at least not permanently) with attention. Changing the past requires changing the narratives we tell ourselves about it. Feeling worthwhile comes from valuing ourselves, not from being valued by others. Feeling safe comes from being in a safe environment and knowing you have the ability to cope with things that come your way. And so on.

Attention can do wonderful things - it can create connection that broadens you, it can give you a place to check yourself and get feedback, it can expand the amount that you can do by giving you a community. But there are things it cannot do, and if you're getting a lot of it and it's not "fixing" your life, then you're probably trying to use it for something it can't do.

So, my advice would be, don't just force yourself to accept less by brute force of logic. Instead, figure out what hole you're trying to fill with attention. (<- Bolded because this is the TLDR of this whole response) There is likely some unmet need, and you have to meet that need in a new way. Healing means creating the conditions under which it feels possible and safe to let go of unhealthy coping mechanisms such as excessive attention seeking.

Finally, a good therapist will not blame you. Everything I said here is stuff that was told to me by my therapist. (However it is not a replacement for therapy omggggg please go get actual therapy.) They may ask you to try doing or thinking uncomfortable things, but these things will be a challenge that you can take on with their help, not something that you have to do as your sole responsibility because you are a "problem" in some way. You are not the problem.

[floralprintsharks]

Srry ur having a bad night 🍨 maybe a warden of your choice w zevran + shielding the other w their body?

Being an Antivan Crow means that Zevran has always been a priceless asset and absolutely disposable at the same time. As long as he does his job and makes himself useful he's somewhat safe—as safe as one can be as a hired assassin.

If he stepped out of line or got killed, he would have quickly been replaced by someone else and no one would have shed a tear about him. Zevran decides not to dwell on this fact for too long because being depressed is counterproductive to his survival.

Being in the Warden's company has meant a lot of tiptoeing, making himself as useful and desirable as possible—to little success.

Nerian Mahariel never seems to need anything and his stoic demeanor betrays the sexual attraction of a brick wall at most. Whenever he says "Thank you" after Zevran hands him something or asks if Zevran is alright after a fight, Zevran jokes about it despite feeling decidedly weird.

He's hardly more than a prisoner. At least that's what he thought. It's the deal Zevran made with Mahariel after his failed assassination attempt. Mahariel though seems not at all interested in treating Zevran like a prisoner or a personal guard dog.

No.

In fact he goes out of his grumpy, stoic way to treat Zevran with respect.

An absolutely insane move on Mahariel's part, but Zevran can't help but be intrigued. So far Nerian has offered to mend Zevran's pants ("If you wanted to see me out of my pants you need only ask, dear Warden."), keeps bringing him food whenever he's done cooking ("I know they say that the way to a man's heart is through his stomach, but I assure you there's no need to charm me with stew") and asks his opinion during group discussions ("You know me, I like being ordered around").

None of Zevran's sexual innuendos are ever perceived with any flicker of either annoyance or interest.

Nerian oftentimes just shrugs, nods and carries on with his life.

Zevran has no idea how to deal with it.

He knows how to secure his survival through means of seduction and that has always worked for him. Up until now.

This respectful behavior on Nerian's part distracts Zevran more than it should, especially when they're in deadly combat with a whole group of abominations.

Zevran is covered in blood, templar intestines and gunk and usually he doesn't mind much, but the smell of this entire tower overrun by demons is horrendous and the impending possibility of getting his mind controlled by one of them doesn't much appeal to Zevran.

Nerian's face is grim and determined as he fires arrow upon arrow into their opponents. Zevran knows that his bow means a lot to him—as one of the few connections to his clan. It's covered in blood now, much like Nerian himself.

Zevran stabs one of the abominations into what used to be a human's face and the shriek it gives off reverberates through the hall like a cacophony of death and misery. It takes more force than Zevran anticipated to get the dagger out of the torn flesh.

"Zevran!"

He lets go of the dagger immediately to swirl around and raise his second weapon, but there's no need. Nerian has interposed himself between Zevran's back and one of the other abominations, his bow discarded on the ground and armed with nothing but a hunting knife.

Something very weird happens inside of Zevran's ribcage but he has no time for sentimentalities, because the abomination rakes its claws across Nerian's chest and throws him to the side. Zevran doesn't hesitate to swing his short sword, tearing through the abomination's torso and making it fall backwards.

He's at Nerian's side before he can check if there's any more abominations left.

"What would you do that for?", he asks, quickly rummaging through his pack to find one of the healing potions. Nerian huffs as he holds the claw wound on his chest, his warm blood seeping through his fingers.

"You're not disposable, you know", he grumbles and takes the potion.

Zevran doesn't know what to say. He can't even make a joke. The so important bow was discarded without hesitation, as was Nerian's own safety. Just to keep Zevran from taking a hit to the back.

"I suppose thanks are in order", he says and does his best to ignore the slight quiver in his voice. Nerian nods.

"It's not a problem."

Oh, Zevran thinks foggily as his heart stomps in his chest like a mad Bronto, but it absolutely is.

[ayyyez]

Headcanons on shisui, minato, and Yamato on how they'd react to their s/o (civilian shinobi or otherwise:)) getting attacked and almost dying? 😭 need the agnst in my life rn I love ur work ur iconic uwu

A/N: the angsssst! but it's okay I love angst it's what I do haha but mostly as long as it has a happy ending because we deserve that as a treat as do they. And aw thanks sm!

TAGS: angst, reader attacked/almost dies, sad characters, mini scenarios rather than headcanons, mentions of hospitals, mentions of wounds, mentions of being impaled, no graphic injuries, characters blaming themselves, long post under cut

CHARACTERS: Shisui Uchiha, Minato Namikaze, Yamato

SHISUI UCHIHA

Shisui is usually the calm and collected one no matter the situation. He can take out any enemy. Always has a plan and can lighten any situation with a lighthearted quip should it call for it.

But this, oh god nothing can prepare him for this.

You're not supposed to be able to get hit. Your entire jutsu is supposed to be impenetrable. More so than that, he's supposed to be your eyes in case things go wrong, your back up.

The enemy found a weak spot though—pulled a thread in the seam everything falls apart right in front of him.

Shisui feels so powerless as he calls your name.

'I've got you.' He says, catching you just before you hit the ground.

He ducks for cover as kunai come at him from all sides. The rest of the squad focus on the guy who got you. Taking down the rest of the enemies is a sinch in comparison. He can't even think about anything else except getting you out and alive.

When he makes it through the thick of the trees he feels you tremble in his arms.

'Shisui.' You call his name, same as you have a thousand times before but this time it's so quiet, almost ghostly.

Shisui is terried to look down but he has to. He can't let you down by betraying his fears. He needs to make you feel safe.

'H-hey.' He doesn't mean to let his voice slip and tremble as he sees how you don't look so good. 'It's going to be alright. We're almost there.'

You manage a nod.

By the time he makes it to the medics you begin to fade and he panics. They take you off his hands and into the tent to tend to your wounds.

Shisui spends the whole time pacing outside pale as a ghost.

He can't sit or stand still. He's a jolting mess. He can barely accept the water or food offered to him by his comrades.

It's the longest wait of his life waiting for you to wake up.

'Shisui.' Is the first thing you say as you come to.

He cries he's so overcome with emotion. Takes your hand and drops his face against it. Poor Shisui is so exhausted and has been so scared he just loves you so much.

MINATO NAMIKAZE

Guilt overwhelms Minato as he sits in the hospital room waiting for you to wake up.

He wasn't there when you had been injured because he held so much faith in your ability to hold your own and now he can't help but blame himself for being so carless. He should have been there. He should have been with you.

It's not that now he believes you can't handle yourself, it's that he should have been there anyway. Anyone can slip up. Anything can happen. This is proof of that and he knows that now.

If he could go back and do things differently— 

No it's too late for that. He would do right and better by you now.

He stays by your side each day waiting for you to wake up. He speaks to you, tells you little things about each day that are trivial but also deep things like how much he cares for you.

'I'm sorry.' He whispers, stroking your hand. 'I love you, I'll be here when you wake up.'

He lets go of your hand and walks over to the window to look out onto the village below.

Everything seems smaller, holds less meaning without you here awake beside him. It's like something is missing. He's no longer quite whole.

There's a stiring behind him and Minato turns wide eyed to find you coming to.

He can't quite believe it when your eyes flutter open.

'Mmm.' You groan. 'Damn that hurts.'

A soft chuckle escapes him and then a few tears too. Just a flood of relief hits at the signs of you being there.

Then you turn to him, a little more awake.

'Hey.' You say. 'What are you doing all the way over there, huh?'

And that's all it takes for him to just crowd you in the tightest (but also careful) hug.

'I'm so glad you're awake.' He whispers. 'I'm so sorry.'

'Don't be sorry.' You assure him. 'I'm glad you're here though.'

He pulls away and looks you deep in the eyes. 'I love you.'

It's enough to take your breath away. 'I love you, too.'

YAMATO

The image of you jumping in front of him to protect him is something Yamato will never forget. He's not sure he can forgive you for it either if you don't wake up.

He knows neither of you had a choice but— 

Seeing you there impaled is just not something he can ever forgive.

You should have let it hit him. Village be damned he'd rather—okay he would not rather hundreds of other people die instead of you getting injured but that's besides the point! He should never of had to see you that way. If you didn't worm your way into his life and make him care then— 

Oh who is he kidding.

Yamato could never be mad at you.

He's mad at himself. He should never have agreed to put you in this situation in the first place. There should have been a better strategy. He should have thought up a better strategy.

'It was an impossible situation, stop beating yourself up over it and just be there instead.'

Yamato lifts his head.

'Kakashi.' He balls his fists against his pants then sighs unfurling them. 'I know it's just—'

'Just that you think you could have strategised yourself out of an impossible situation now that it's over.'

'This is different.'

'It's always different with the people we care about.' He gives him a knowing expression. 'With the people we love.'

'I don't need a pep talk right now.'

'No but you also don't need to sit here waiting for someone to scold you like you've done something wrong.'

Yamato gives him a doubtful look.

'You both did your duty and what you wanted to do so now you ought to both be together for the waking up part.' Kakashi sighs. 'Neither of you are dying today.'

Yamato takes a deep breath letting it settle in his lungs before he exhales again. Kakashi was right. He needs to be by your side.

'Okay.' Is all he says before he stands and heads to your room, leaving his senpai behind.

The tension is palpable as he enters your room. The machines beeping and your assisted breathing fill his ears. He sits beside you timid as he shifts closer.

'Sorry, I took so long.' Is all he whispers as he wakes for you to wake.

Your eyes flicker open a few moments later as if to let him know it's alright. He's not mad anymore, only relieved. Loved.

[dino-boyo-agere]

I don't think I ever posted this silly little AgeRe Steddie head canon of mine, even though I made an edit about it hehe

Eddie has a massive sweet tooth, like.. massive, even more so when he's regressed.

Eddie can also get very cranky, when he's hungry or tired.. or - god forbid - both.

One day, little Eddie decides that he will have ice cream for breakfast, from now on..

Steve's reply: "No, Tough Guy, I don't think you will."

Eddie is not happy about that. Little him is not the best at dealing with rejection. So, he throws a full blown hissy fit. Sticking out his tongue at Steve, yelling: "ur mean!", throwing plushies at him and storming off to his room. (Steve has a little room for him in his house, by the way) There, he angrily grabs the walkie talkie, to continue his arguing with Steve.

The latter just let's him.. He knows full well that Eddie is simply still tired, because he just woke up and that he doesn't really feel as betrayed as he makes it seem. Yes, Eddie is really upset at the moment, but that will definitely subside. As soon as he had something to eat (real food obviously), all will be better, as always. Besides, it's absolutely adorable to see him like this.

Eddie's nose all scrunched up in anger, his hair still all messy from sleeping and his pacie making it just a little more difficult to actually yell a fully coherent sentence..

Steve has to hold back a few chuckles with all his might. He doesn't want to seem like he is mocking his - already distressed - "Little Sir Cries-A-Lot". He doesn't want to undermine his emotions, be they proportionate to the situation or not. Steve wants Eddie to feel safe, valid, loved.

However, he also can't spoil him too much either, so he has to keep a serious demeanor. Trying to calmly explain to Eddie why exactly ice cream is not a substantial breakfast.. It hardly even qualifies as food.

At first, Eddie is not very receptive to the logic of things, but after about twenty minutes of arguing, stomping around and crying, he realizes that Steve won't budge on this one... Plus, Eddie is getting really hungry. So, he gives up the argument.. For now, at least.

Steve hugs his little daredevil tightly, after he - finally - ate his whole wheat cereal and calmed down a bit.

Eddie starts crying, profusely apologizing for acting the way he did. He didn't want to be like that, he never does, but sometimes he just can't help it. Sometimes, his emotions are just too big for him to deal with properly.

Steve reassures him, saying: "It's fine! Sometimes, feelings are hard to express, I get that. I love you, everything about you.. Even your tantrums. You're okay! We're okay!"

They just cuddle after that, for HOURS!!!

Text on pictures says:

Eddie, yells into the walkie talkie: "Why no gib meh ice cream?!"

Steve, thinks to himself: Don't laugh, stay assertive.. darn it, why is he so cute?

.･｡»･⁠°✧ ↑ Here the pictures without text!! ↑ ✧°･«｡･.

Sidenote:

What grumpy baby Eds calls Steve: Meanie, Dummy, Stupid Head..

What Steve calls grumpy bby Eds: Tough Guy, Pal, Bud, Sassy One..

.ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ×ﾟ｡･».ﾟ°･⁠✧ ↓ DNI ↓ ✧･° ﾟ.«･｡ﾟ×ﾟ｡･*.ﾟ.

banner by @froggy-clubhouse

[threepointseven]

Periwinkle Glaze lilies

🌺summary!🌺- catching him touching another woman that looks too much like her. are you really just guizhongs replacement..?

Type- Fic 🌻

Flowers included!🌼=zhongli x fem!reader

Note🍀=ik no ones gonna read this since no one liked zhongli content if its not nsfw but whatever tbh😭 ive been having major burn out and i loved writing this, if ur actually gonna read this i recommend listening to sad music

����Flower toxins!🥀- cheating, slightly suggestive, self deprecation of your body, subtle hints of starving/excessive diets, extremely angsty!!

Genshin masterlist

You bask in the scent of the herbal green tea that your lover bought as you walk toward his tall, sleek figure. Zhongli was a kind man. Always loving, never aggressive, and most importantly seemingly loyal.

“Li, it’s like 6 am, how do you get up so early for the sake of making tea??” You chuckle at your lover before enveloping him in your arms. Zhongli was warm, never cold.

“Ah, it seems like you're up my dear.” he hugs you back smiling and nuzzling into your neck, it was a peaceful friday morning. No interrupting noise besides the soft flow and falling of Liyue’s autumn leaves.

6 am in the morning on a friday, you see yet again, another obvious hickey and a puny attempt at a cover up with foundation that was most definitely not yours. But even after the weeks you’ve known you refused to confront him. Why ruin the relationship you have now? Even if its just pretend, if you pay no bother to the fact he’s been cheating on you for weeks now he’ll stay, right?

Ignore it Y/N.

Is what you've been telling yourself this entire time. You feel ever so safe in his arms, the lies feel too true up close.

“You came home so late last night.. Did Hu tao make you do overtime?”

“A-ah yes… that girl piled all her work on me and it kept me busy….” Zhongli releases you from the hug, stuttering and pulling his collar up to hide the foundation hidden hickey.

What a pathetic lie, if you're going to cheat on me at least let the excuses be good..

Knowing if he continued to cheat on you and leave it out in the open, the dam would break. Zhongli is a gentle, caring lover, but the way he’s been acting lately betrays that claim. His temper shortens by the day and he uses most of his time without you staring at a potted glaze Lily in his room.

“This glaze Lily is special, its from a woman who is very dear to me, her name is Guizhong.”

He’s never held back on smothering Guizhong, his first love. You’ve never seen a day go by without your dear lover complimenting the woman or comparing you to her.

Your 2 year anniversary was today, 2 whole years and half of it your lover used it to cheat on you and hook up with other women. But you’ll ignore it, you’ll ignore his pathetic hickey cover ups and the amount of ‘overtime’ he does nowadays. For what reason? Not even you know why.

“Li! We need to hurry up, our reservation is at 7:30!” Li, a nickname you grew accustomed to using as you rush to your date at this new, fancy, liyue restaurant. From what people see, you and Zhongli are a picture perfect couple, arguments scarce, love is somehow always in the air and you two have always been seen as a mature couple.

But it's only what they see.

“You look beautiful tonight Y/N… You look just like her..” he mumbles the last part while he smiles at you, caressing your cheek as you give him the most lovestruck face you could muster even though you were near your breaking point. You knew what he meant by ‘her’. You hate the idea of jealousy, a selfish emotion that controls other people but how could you not complain when the man you thought of as your homeland is still in love with the woman he met amongst the glaze lilies?

You looked at the food on your plate blankly, poking it with your fork.

“You havent been eating lately.”

“Sorry, i havent been as hungry.”

“Well if this is a diet my dear, you’ve been looking much healthier. “

A diet? Healthier? Im doing this for him, he is the one i want but the one he wants is guizhong.

I have to look like her if i want to have any chance of winning him over.. right?

Your hands tremble before excusing yourself to the bathroom. The moment your in there you weep, staring at yourself in the mirror.

Guizhong… i have to look like guizhong, act like Guizhong…

Why wont that filthy woman leave me alone?!

….

What have i been doing?

Your mind flashes back to the past, the moment you realized he was still inlove with her. Yet even when you found out he still adored her romantically you stayed with him. Clung to him more, tried acting more mature, and started eating less to attempt looking like her.

So frail, so skinny. Through the mirror you no longer looked like yourself but the woman you tried to impersonate for this man’s love.

You stare at yourself in the slightly cracked bathroom mirror, tears running down your face as all you can see is Guizhongs replacement.

Why have i been changing myself to be her? What am i doing. There’s no way in hell i love zhongli enough to change my entire being!

You wipe the tears off your face, fixing your hair and going back to the table pretending nothing happened with your trembling steps.

Where is he?

You scout the restaurant and ask a waiter if they’ve seen your lover. “Hm.. suit..brown hair.. ah! He went outside with this woman who wore a periwinkle hanfu.”

Periwinkle hanfu..? Woman..?

You rush to the outside of the restaurant.

Go back inside Y/N, you know full well what you’ll see.

But what if…

Your greeted with zhongli, your lover, and a brunette woman in a periwinkle hanfu. Her hair is long and flows with the wind, her skin similar to what some imagine angel wings look like up close. Her voice was smooth and mature, practically 100 times better than how you looked.

You watched blankly as he dug his knee between her legs, blushing and caressing her skin.

“Li.”

“Huh- ah! Y-Y/N! You’ve come at a wrong time! This is an old friend of mine-!”

You stayed silent as the light faded from your eyes. Your 2 year anniversary, the day you finally caught him red-handed.

Why didnt it feel as satisfying as they say it does in the movies?

Right. Because i love that man, but he doesnt love me.

“I always knew you were cheating on me Zhongli, i always knew from the hickeys and the lipstick stains.. but god, couldnt you have put in a bit of effort to make sure the woman who loved you most didnt find out?!”

“Y/N I-“

Zhongli gulped pushing the woman off of him

“And with a woman who’s practically identical to Guizhong! I always knew you were still in love with her and i never commented on it but this is where i cross the fucking line-“

“You are being immature and impulsive Y/N! Im not cheating nor am i still inlove with her-“

“What a sick joke! You would confidently say to me during our 2 year anniversary that i remind you of her and never thought anything of it. I was willing to change for you but you just had to mess things up?!”

Tears threatened to stream down your face as you shouted at the man, his mistress cowering in fear and shame. You almost felt bad for her. You tried to hold back from getting anymore emotional.

“I cant deal with your sorry cheating ass anymore Morax.”

The word “morax” rolled off your tongue like a threat as you stormed off to who knows where. Liyue was a big place, a beautiful country your beloved carved with his own hands, and so you ran, ran to the tallest mountain top you could reach.

Glaze lilies.. as you stood on the mountain top you saw numbers of glaze lilies paint the grass as the white glowed slightly in the moonlight. Your legs gave up on you as you shook beneath liyue’s moon.

What was he going to do? Was he going to try and pick up the broken pieces of your heart? God you hoped so, but as the cold air in Liyue embraced you there were no shaking of the glaze lilies, there was no man saying your name, there was no Zhongli climbing this mountain top for the sake of apologizing.

He’s.. hes really just leaving me like that..? Hes not chasing after me..? Why..?

Minutes turned into hours of non stop tears as you walked down the mountain with a heart broken into trillions of pieces.

“Zhongli..”

The sight of him, the mere pronunciation of his name irked you and you watched as he looked at his feet.

“Y/N, i need to explain things to you”

“Im not gonna forgive y-“

“Im not asking for forgiveness, Y/N.” His firm tone made you flinch as you looked into his eyes with malice

“I did infact cheat on you with a woman that looked like guizhong, but i simply cannot hide my thoughts any longer. Guizhong has everything you dont, Y/N. Guizhong could be everything you are but even more elegant, even more intelligent, she will always be one step ahead of everyone to me.”

Tears pricked at your eyes with the claim

“Was i.. was i really just guizhongs little replacement..? All the dates, all the kisses, the love letters—was all you really saw.. guizhong..?”

“Im afraid so.”

—

—

—

—

—

—

“Im gonna hook up with your adepti children you dumb ancient historical artifact!”

[angelyuji]

Yandere Miles with a monster S/O would be cool. Maybe a werewolf, since they could help Miles patrol Brooklyn at night. And it’s quite funny that Miles thinks that you’re this fragile angel then he realizes you COULD kick his ass if you wanted to.

bestie istg i cannot tell you how hard i laughed at the look on his face when ur a whole werewolf 😭 also all the information i know about werewolves is from harry potter and supernatural, so forgive me if this sounds different from what you imagined.

cw // yandere behavior, stalking, werewolves, breaking and entering

·         miles would find out about your… “abilities” while he stalking watching you

·         he’s obviously shocked and confused

·         why didn’t you tell him?

·         even though you’ve never talked to him before or like knew he existed, he still feels betrayed

·         however, he’s not scared of you, but scared for you

·         he’s scared that someone else will see you and try to kill you

·         “ganke, they’re gonna get hurt. someone will catch them while they’re out and i’m gonna lose the love of my life!”

·         “out where? miles, what are you talking about? what’s wrong with (y/n)?”

·         “n-nothing’s wrong with them. i’m just worried about them.”

·         “…right...well, i’m sure they’re fine.”

·         he uses this new information to watch over as you transform to make sure you’re safe

·         (he’ll also figure out the symptoms you get from your lycanthropy and drop cards, medicine, food, and different items in your locker whenever you’re sick)

·         if he ever ended up going against you in werewolf form, he’ll try his best to make sure to subdue you without hurting you

·         it doesn’t matter to him how strong you are or how efficient you are at hiding your secret, he’ll still worry about you and believe that he needs to protect you

·         “wtf, why did spiderman tie me up?”

·         miles would never confront you about your illness

·         he doesn’t want to expose something that brought you so much suffering and use that to his advantage

·         miles is a really nice yandere ngl

·         “ganke, do you wanna make sweaters for (y/n)?”

·         “no, i got some new games.”

·         “ok, then you play and i’ll make some sweaters.”

·         even if you eventually found out about his alter-ego and offered to help him patrol, he would never let you

·         like i said before, the last thing he wants to do is put you in danger

-

i wanted to make this more funnier, but my yan writing is usually more angsty, so i decided to make this not angsty and just yan!miles being cute and protective. anyways if you couldn’t tell, i based y/n on harry potter werewolves, like the getting sick before turning. hope you enjoyed, anon!

[hahanoiwont]

I am awaiting the inevitable shock and existentialism Fell will feel when he realises that Frisk is no longer in stripes. Patiently. Cheerfully. >:D

okay so imagine. imagine ur fell. imagine with me. let's stand in his shoes.

You are Papyrus. You are also known as Fell.

Your childhood was rough and isolating. You were alone often, and when you did see other people it was overshadowed by resentment or just a violent experience overall. You killed someone before you could reasonably be called an adult, and your brother, whose visits were already few and far between, nearly vanished from your life. You didn't know where he went, but you can only assume he had some other life where he pretended you'd never even existed, and he'd left you to dust alone. The only sign that he still remembered you at all was the food in the pantry, and you started wondering if maybe he wouldn't always be there to bring it. Then one day he came home half dead, and suddenly you're the one putting food in the pantry, having to navigate a world you've only seen glimpses of. Things are rocky. You know intellectually that your family dynamic is fairly gentle, and you could consider yourself lucky...but you remember when he loved you. And he doesn't act the same anymore. You think that maybe he loved you as well as he was able, but once he realized what you are he couldn't care for you anymore. Maybe there is something so terrible in you, so cold and ruthless, that even your gentle, patient older brother couldn't stand to be around you. Maybe you did this to him.

No, you decide. You know better. Perhaps this is partially because of you, but it is also because of the things Sans can see that no one else can--a tally of pain inflicted by every person he meets. You watch him come back to life just for something to break inside of him, seeing all of those numbers tick up. Something in him drives him and he mutters that every single monster deserves to die. But that gentler Sans is still there, staying his hand. He never could stand to hurt anyone. Neither could you, once.

You should probably take this as an indication that things only ever get worse and you will never have anything better. You do not. You're going to change this world. Some small corner of it will be safe, and maybe then Sans will find it in himself to forgive you--for what, you don't know. For existing, or for being a monster, or some sin of your personality. You tell yourself that you'll be satisfied even if Sans never loves you like he used to again, as long as he's not in pain anymore. He's dying. You need to save him. You don't have the luxury of being a softer person.

A softer person comes along.

With a human soul, you could break the Barrier. You could give it to Sans and let him leave this place. You could surrender it to Asgore and the reward would see you and your brother safe for a long time, maybe even safe enough to go far away on the Surface and never see another monster again. There are people you would miss, but it would be worth it to rest in safety.

The time comes to kill them.

They are a child.

You don't ask Sans whether he has even bothered trying to kill them--their budding adoration tells you that he hasn't. They whisper to you that he offered them mercy. You try not to be glad for that stupid mistake. Still, there are more important things--Sans is likely to hate you for killing a defenseless child, but Sans has hated you for greater and lesser crimes, and this is for him. This is for both of you; your ticket out. This is a golden chance. You just have to kill them.

They are a very flattering child. Sans has never cared to notice your fearsome armor or malignant traps. They are a creature of superior taste.

You have to kill them. Things will be so much better if you just kill them.

Your attacks become more dramatic. You switch out the swift and lethal attacks for the showier, cooler attacks. The human is impressed. You think that they are having fun--to your surprise, you find that you are, too. You regret that you have to kill them.

They are surprisingly difficult to kill. It reminds you of practicing your bone attacks when you were a child, waiting for Sans to finally come home so you could show him, waiting for him to be so proud of your progress that he would stay with you this time. You find that it's more fun with a partner. You bring out some sequences that you've discarded for being all flash and no substance. The human loves them.

You don't want to lose this, you realize. You don't want them to die.

You find that you are sorry for hurting them. They have seemed fearless, but they have sustained great deals of damage to their tiny HP count. You can't see the numbers like your brother can, but it can't be greater than 40 total. You have harmed them.

This tiny, innocent creature...you have harmed them. You did not have to. They were not forcing you to fight. But you harmed them.

You apologize. The human seems surprised, but pleased. They offer you a big grin and instant forgiveness, because they are a child. Living in your world, this is likely the best anyone has treated them.

Not anymore.

You bring them home. Sans is there, watching the doorway for your return with hopeless eyes. Perhaps he thinks you will not notice how they brighten and his whole face softens when he sees your LOVE, unchanged, and the child, alive. The child does not seem to recognize the difference, but greets him like a dear friend. He fakes ambivalence and disappears to one of his sentry stations.

You have a child, now.

This is a Concern.

You were hardly a child, yourself--how can you possibly provide the things that a child may need? Most especially a human child, who may need all sorts of things that you have no way of knowing about. You have seen them eat, so you can assume that they need to be fed; they are wearing clothes, so you can assume they need to be clothed; but what of entertainment? Affection? Training? What sorts of guidance will they need?

You have doubts. One of the only things that you are confident of is that the child does not need doubts. You must choose to be bold. If you are denying the very murderous nature of monsters by taking in a child, then so be it: you will not do this in half measures.

You set about creating the optimal environment for child-rearing. Plenty of doors and windows that lock only from the inside. Enrichment in the form of attack training. Weapons for self-protection. You make it clear that you will always have time for them, no matter what else may be at hand. You will interrupt even the most important of work days to tend to their childhood accidents--a stray stab wound here, or a timely rescue there. You prepare to put the changing of your world on hold for as long as it takes to see this human into adulthood.

You wonder what kind of adult they will be. Bold and strong like you, or wry and clever like Sans, or as passionate as Undyne--or none of the above, perhaps. If you raise them right, maybe they will be different from all of you. Maybe they will stay small and loving forever.

You do not look forward to seeing their heart break, seeing their first kill, seeing them turn to LOVE. These rites of passage seem suddenly gruesome. But you want to be there, all the same--you want to take them home afterwards, and see them find their feet again every time they stagger. There is a whole tiny person in your home, and you can ensure that they are never alone.

Then, the world changes.

Perhaps you will not need to guard them so fiercely. Perhaps you will be able to devote your efforts instead into becoming something softer and kinder. You will finally find the words to say when they are lonely, or frightened, or when you have been too harsh and their eyes fill with tears. You will no longer be too harsh. You cannot ever be human, but perhaps you can raise one nearly as well as another human would. For the first time, you feel as if there is love in you--in all of monsterkind.

Then, the child dies.

Sans said he would bring them home. He left to go retrieve them. And they disappear forever. His guilt is plain to see, but you allow him to fool you--he says that he has killed a child, and you sympathize with him. You provide comfort. You do not realize.

Several people take you aside, one by one by one, to gently break the news to you. Sans encountered the human, they say. The two of them had a disagreement. Sans took them somewhere and he came back alone. The evidence is clear--you have Sans's confession, even.

He would not have snuffed that tiny life out. He loves them. You have seen him come back to life by inches, resurrecting the brother you thought you'd lost. This cannot be.

You wait for Sans to tell you that.

He does not.

Your brother has stolen your child's life. Your tiny sibling, who you have sworn to protect--who each of you have promised to raise gently, to treat well, to absolutely spoil with safety and affection, as much as you can. You finally had a warmth in your heart and in your home, and so did Sans. But he smothered it. He killed them. You cannot believe it. But, you think of the creeping insanity that you thought had been defeated in him, and you don't know. You don't know what he is capable of anymore.

Sans used to stand for mercy--if not for its own sake, then because killing is not a virtue. He was the only person who believed LOVE was not a good thing, and now, he is the only person who is not changing his mind.

You're furious. You're betrayed. You're heartbroken. You want to confront Sans. You never want to see him again. You want your sibling back, to protect them better this time, to do things differently so that somehow it goes right. Sans would not do this. You must have caused it somehow. You identify your failings after a week: you were too slow.

The world was changing, but not fast enough. Sans took his own action first.

You leave. You intend to come back, when you have changed the world into something Sans can stand, when your fury has calmed--you leave. That is what matters.

You do come back, once. Sans's pantry is empty. You fill it. You do not think that there are any grocers willing to do business with him, not with the worries about food shortages. Not with what everyone knows he's done.

In his basement, you discover something odd: hope. A skeleton with your face who claims to have seen your sibling, calls them "Frisk." They never shared their name with you. You had hoped they would, in time; but they did not, and now they cannot.

But perhaps they will.

Perhaps you have not lost that child, that place of warmth in your home and heart. If grief is love with no one to direct it to, then you no longer need to grieve. They are alive. Your brother has done an awful thing, but not what you feared. You can get them back. You will not miss the landmarks that were not to be. You would give anything to scoop them up and hold them again.

You find them. Finally, you find them again--or they find you. They approach you, and you approach them, and at first you are puzzled by this human: a grown, adult human, standing half in front of a skeleton who is almost your brother but not entirely, and watching you with caution that turns to unbridled delight when they realize who it is they have been brought to meet. Your phone begins ringing. You ignore it. The skeleton who is not your brother is watching your stats with a sort of horror. You ignore that, as well. This human looks at you with warmth and trust that you have only seen from...

It's your sibling. It's your sibling, and you have them back, they are just in front of you, and you have missed them. You have missed so much of their life. The child you were raising is gone, with no hint of them in this human's scarred HP and protective stance. They do not have your boldness or Sans's wit or Undyne's passion or even the sheltered softness you had secretly hoped they would keep...you weren't there to shelter them.

You have the human back, but not the child. They don't need you anymore.

In this moment, you have the realization: searching for them, you have met people who are gentler than you, cleverer, kinder, less awkward and violent...all of them who counted your sibling as part of their own family. They have had such a life beyond you that you cannot grasp the whole of it. With so many better selves, so many better brothers...

They don't need you any more. Why on earth would they want you?

[relaxxattack]

hiiii hello whats up . i used to be a bedrock bros enjoyer such as you, but sadly when that fell apart i went to ranboo. however, whats ur favorite part about the dynamic of tommy and techno? and why do you think it fell apart?? sorry if this is a bad ask sdjklldsfd D:

no worries anon!! im sorry that this’ll probably be a bad answer, since it’s around bed time for old zayne.

i’m sure i’ve reblogged posts that explain this in much better words, and im tired right now, but in simple terms: techno and tommy’s teamup was doomed from the start. because they have different morals and principles. both of them were convinced they would be able to bring the other person over to their side, and both of them are so stubborn that it didn’t work for either direction. tommy is terrified of dream, a tyrant who picks on all the weak, and he looks towards l’manberg as a safe home. technoblade is the most powerful fighter on the server, so he has a privilege no one else has, and therefore sees dream as just another random guy, and l’manberg as a government threat to his agency. 

techno also lied to tommy about his plans, and continuously claimed tommy was only his business partner. tommy himself didn’t reveal his trauma behind dream (although obviously he didn’t really understand it) and he’s far too emotional to properly explain his points of view to anyone in the heat of the moment like techno can. but techno wouldn’t understand that tommy needed to have his own agency (choosing to side with tubbo instead of being a terrorist) after weeks of abuse, and in turn tommy wouldn’t understand techno feeling used by everyone he trusted.

in the end the reason they both felt so betrayed by the other was that they both actually cared, and that’s the saddest part. they were friends, but now they both think the relationship was one-sided. sadly it was always doomed to fail.

my favorite part of their dynamic was just... all of it, man. the way techno was usually willing to compromise with tommy about things that upset him, and quickly backtracked from tommy’s triggers. the way tommy felt (and still feels) safe around techno. the way they invented the sellout trading. techno letting tommy take weapons and food to soothe his paranoia, and tommy being technos source of company. idk they just made me so soft. especially in comparison to the tommy/dream dynamic we’d just escaped.

[heleizition]

How Alfred interact with his shifter babies? Where is Barbara in all of this? Is she a shifter or human? Also, I want to know more about Tim's parents... How was they and how Tim ended up with batfamily?

ok hold on . .. i need a second . .. im thinking about alfred holding like, baby panther dick in hi arms n smilng softly,,, jst . .. give me a moment . ..... like ... hes cooking n hyerna jason who’s starting to grow jst sits beside him n tucks his head on the counter n looks at alfred like feed me and alfred is so so fond of his grandsons yk,,, of his family,,,, cries

OK SO beside that tim shifts from cat to human the first time with alfred,,, hes a safe adult in his eyes and he trusts him and its a trust alfred hasnt and wont ever betray. cass just likes to sit on his shoulder while he has tea,,, he makes her a cup and she flies over to drink when she feels like it but mostly she’s chilling. steph usually runs around and tries to pick things up to “help” alfred and he gives her lil pets,,,, duke usually feels like in the way when hes shifted and alfred is cleaning up or working around him so he usually shift back and helps and it makes alfred smile a lot even after he tries to shoo duke away bc thats His Job yk,,, duke still helps sefooefshofse

OK UM i admit i did not think of babs bc she always slips from my mind,,,, i dont have a big connection to her character,,,, im not sure if she’s a shifter yet i gotta think but i kinda feel  ,,, fox for her,,,,, if u have other suggestions im open ? i dont know much about her character sadly,,,,

OK SO under the cut is tim’s story n how he met and ended up w the bat, big tw for animal (shifter) abuse and child abuse, starvation, abandonment, umm mutilation & description of injury

tim first turned into a cat (to his parents knowledge) when he was about 4 or 5. he’d been already introduced to the world but as he was a small child they hadn’t really been showing him around everywhere so only a handful of people knew/remembered small boy tim. janet has a particular hate toward that branch in her family that can shift so she’s really jst. hating her son having it and she immediately just. decides that she just doesnt want to see him. so jack and her just start locking him in a tiny cat cage, which prevent him from turning back into a boy, feed him catfood when they remember to feed him. at some point they get him declawed (which gives him terribly vivid nightmares of human him getting his fingers torned off of his hand) and when they leave they give him a tight collar while leaving him out of the cage which prevnts him from shifting back bc the collar would just go through tim’s throat if he shifted to human.

so tim drake ends up . not existing. everyone forgets the drakes had a son, tim very rarely gets to be in human shape (which hurts at some point), and when he does his parents usually yell at him and making him feel very unwanted, going as far as throwing things at him until he jst, shifts back and makes himself as small and forgotten as possible. he stopped going to school early, but he still taught himself to read (u gotta do smth when ur stuck as a cat for years) and went through lots of his parents books (that were on bottoms shelfs bc its hard to put the books back in the right shelves while in cat form and he gets yelled at enough as it is just for existing).

so he’s like 10, and his parents have been gone for a while . and he’s rly not doing good. he’s not rly clinging to life. he’s underfed. everything hurts. his brain isn’t really reactive anymore. and hes on the wall between the drakes and the wayne’s estate dick and jason are in the garden, playing around, and he just. falls asleep. passes out from exhaustion and his body kind of giving up on him.

they hear him or see him, idk, they find him and jason shifts back, holding the small kitten in his arms and he runs inside, n they take care of him, the adress on the collar said he’s from next door,,, at this point they dont know he’s a shifter,, but when he wakes up tim’s all warm and tucked against a warm body (dick) and jason is beside them petting him gently and the second tim is awake he’s tense and trying to get away bc humans have done nothing but hurt him at this point yk,, he’s barely ever met anyone,,, he sticks to the drake’s house bc he’s terrified they’ll know if he goes somewhere else

(altho deep down he thinks they’d be happy if they came home to an empty house)

and when he wakes up. thats when dick n jay understand he’s not just a cat, he’s a shifter, n jason holds him in place to remove the collar bc he *knows* he cant possibly be able to shift to human with it,,, but even without it tim doesnt shift back, hes jst, scared cat,,,,

(”hey, it’s ok, we’re like you” jason says, in the most gentle voice dick’s ever heard him use. there is a moment of silence, where the kitten blinks, and then the familiar noise of flesh rearranging itself while jason shifts into his hyena form. he’s careful to keep his distance, laying on his stomach to make himself smaller - which helps, but not by much as he’s still huge compared to the little shifter in front of them. dick knows the lines of tension and those of exhaustion in their muscles, and remembers how they didn’t even stir when jason had carried them inside. he shifts. 

“i’m gonna get you some food, okay ?” he levels his tone with his brothers. “we should have some fruits around, upstairs. fish maybe ? if you’d like ? or something else.” he smiles that smiles only he knows how to smile. “or maybe you’d like to pick yourself ?”

the little cat manages to make themselves smaller.)

they eventually manage to feed him and hydrate him, and dick tells alfred and bruce about the little shifter while jason keeps an eye on him,,, bruce connect the drake and tim shaped dots. he remembers janet and jack rejecting a gala invitation a while back bc she had recently delivered, only he’d never seen the kid.

tim only lets jason and dick close a first, bc they’re younger, bc they’re shifters, and then alfred bc alfred always brings him food on a plate and with a fork and knife like he’s going to use them as a human. he talks to tim and pets him gently once tim allows it,,, he’s a safe adult.

bruce scares him a lot, even if he’s gentle and he’s a good dad. he’s bigger than jack has ever been, and he knows he could hurt him. he just scares him a lot. he has too much authority, too much presence.

tim shifts back into a human on is seventh day at the manor, while alfred sits with him in a little room tim had hid in. he’s a very small boy and he cries out in pain when he shifts, but alfred puts a hand on his cheek and just smiles

(”hello, my boy”)

tim is very quiet, takes a shower and shifts back before anyone else can see him,,, but slowly he lets it happen around the others. one time dick n jay wake up from a nap session to a little boy suggled between them,,, there is a lot of hurt and pain from jason bc he’s been that little boy, hurt and scared and in pain, and it brings back a lot of sad things,,,

eventually he lets himself shift into bruce’s arms on the second week and he cries a lot n bruce tells him he figured out he’s the drake’s son, and jst, h, he adopts

[sapphicambitions]

like when I say I think Luke Castellan is gay I don’t mean it as a cutesy “don’t u wish ur fave was gay” kind of way I mean textually and seriously I believe he was gay. 

I could cite the petty stuff like “he only had female friends growing up” and “he clearly never showed interest in women even though many women were interested in him” or “he is one of the few people in the series who didn’t actually have a serious love interest / partner” or whatever but i feel like it’s actually much deeper than that. Luke was a young person who had a difficult and strained relationship with his parents. He saw how flawed the system was and how it was treating people like him, and sought to change the system, give power to people like him, and start it all over. (Yeah, he fell victim to people who influenced him to the dark side but that had nothing to do with his gayness, imo.) He just reminds me a lot of characters like Nico and Catra from She-Ra: repressed gay with a strained relationship with parental figures, angry and willing to take down the world. In this essay I will-

.......like no but seriously

Luke had a very troubled childhood because of his mother’s damaged mind, and the fact that she was constantly having fits and telling him how terrible things were going to be for him. When Luke is (angrily) describing his childhood to Hermes he says: “You could’ve helped me when she was having one of her fits, shaking me and saying crazy things about my fate. When I used to hide in the closet so she wouldn’t find me with those glowing eyes,” like!!! he even mentions hiding in a closet (let me find the subtext where i want it)  but seriously, you know what’s one of the first things my mother said to me when I came out to her? “You know how much harder your life is going to be, don’t you?” So then Luke ran away from his home and found a new family, one that looked out for each other and loved each other more than their blood family ever did. This is a queer narrative!!

And with Hermes, it was all sorts of fucked up. His father kept him at a distance. Made Luke feel like there was something wrong with him, like he didn’t love him. His dad made it very clear to him what his expectations were of him, tried to encourage him to be a great hero, like all the heroes before him (when he was talking to him about sending him on a quest and Hermes said “You will get a change to be a great hero before…”) but Luke didn’t want to be the person his father expected him to be. He wanted to be something new, something true to himself. Luke was always burdened down with the weight of his parent’s expectations, both the expectation that he should strive to be a perfect hero and the knowledge that his future was doomed. 

So one time i was at a bar with friends and me and the only other queer person there were talking and he was like “gay men and their dads, you know what i mean?” and I was like “yeah also gay women and their moms” and we had a whole discussion about growing up with a certain set of expectations of who you’ll be from your parents and the gendered expectations they have for you and having to crush all of that when you come out to them and navigating the difficulties that come with that when you want to be your own person so like there’s your real world comparison / evidence for that argument

ALSO Luke ran away from home but then kind of immediately went to Camp Half-Blood where he was shoved into the Hermes cabin with all of his siblings and undetermined kids and then still expected to scrape part of his food in the fire and be thankful to his deadbeat dad. That would suck! He was already harboring all of this rage inside of him, and then he went on his quest. Saw the world. Was exposed to other schools of thought. He understood that he was just being used as a pawn. He came back a different person, he didn’t quite fit in at camp anymore now that he’d seen the world. Kind of like when I went off to be gay at college and then came back to my childhood home and had to be straight around all my high school friends. just saying.

Luke saw the flaws in the system, the way the gods ruled the world. The way the gods treated their children and how much it hurt them. He felt so betrayed and hurt and abandoned by his dad and all the gods, so instead of sitting with it, he thought “I can do better.” Luke sought to rebuild the world, scrap it all and start new. Start with new leaders who took better care of everyone, who did things completely differently than the way it was done before, and raze anything before it. We’re going to ignore the fact that he was influenced to the dark side for a moment because it’s not related to this essay, but I also feel like this is a very queer narrative. (how many times can i say that phrase in this essay) Seeing the flaws in the way the world is treating people like you and wanting to do better. Luke said (this not an actual book quote more of a dramatic sentiment): “I won’t be used and I won’t be who you want me to be. I will become my own person and there’s nothing you can fucking do to stop me. I will make a new world, better than before, without you, for people like me, and I will tear down the walls of the previous world if I fucking have to” and i just think that’s very gay rights of him.

A thing that I’m a big fan of is seeing specific character types and relating them to each other. For example: our fave Nico di Angelo and Catra from She-Ra. (If you haven’t seen She-Ra, she’s the DEFINITION of an angry repressing gay) We can see from Nico’s narrative and from Catra’s narrative and also just straight up my own personal narrative that sometimes when you’re gay and repressing and afraid of becoming the person you are warned against, while also knowing that you were meant for more but maybe not quite understanding what that more is yet, and overall just want to feel accepted and loved as who you truly are but not receiving that, it can tend to make one lash out in angry and irresponsible ways. It can make one isolate themselves from those they previously were close to. It can lead to irrational and impulsive choices for all the wrong reasons because you don’t feel right and you don’t know why. Not at all saying this is the same across the board for queer people, it’s just something that honestly happens to some people and I can relate to when i see it in characters. 

I see that in Luke. He is weighed down by everything his parents want him to be, both good and bad, and is trying to scrap the world and make a new one for people like him. He wants to take his turn, pushing aside anyone who’s hurt him. Luke was someone who was constantly being torn apart by the world and just wanted to feel safe and secure in who he was and the world he was in. He was acting in anger and fear and hurt and revenge for his childhood and because he still felt like there wasn’t a place in the world for him. He lashed out against his father and his family and his friends and pushed them all away. Sure, he had some friends at Camp Half-Blood, but Annabeth’s devotion to him was not enough to make up for like, all of his childhood trauma. First everything with his mom and then being on the run for so long and then meeting his dad and then losing Thalia (which also fueled his anger and hatred of the gods but like we knew that) and his quest and just everything. He was dealt a cruel hand and he didn’t handle it well. Not that that has anything to do with him being gay but I’m just lamenting over the tragedy of his life. Anyway.

Also not to quote the Lighting Thief because it’s not technically in Rick’s canon but i still think they perfectly understood the characters so I’m including it, but the idea that Luke has tried to be a good kid, he’s tried to do what was expected of him, he’s done everything they ever asked of him, but it didn’t pay off. It didn’t matter. It still wasn’t a world he belonged in. “you know this world will never be ours as long as our parents rule over the stars” and “it’s time to make the world our own” strikes me very much to the tune of LGBT activism. once again ringing in that idea of “if you won’t make the world better than i will do it with my bare hands” he also sings “the gods were never on our side, so i think it’s time we watched them fall” which gets to me every time because like he was just a kid! he was just a kid who had so much hurt and anger inside of him and he went about everything the wrong way but he was just a fucking kid! 

also YES to be petty and shallow but while Annabeth and Thalia refer to luke romantically, he never mentioned the same for him. Kelli the sexy monster hits on him during Battle of the Labyrinth and was clearly interested in him and he pushes her away without any hesitation. IN FACT the only demigods referenced on Luke’s ship are Chris and Ethan (why we didn’t see any of that trio, I’ll never understand), with Ethan working much closer with Luke and being a major player in the Titan War. (also I think Ethan is queer too but that’s a battle for another day.) And Rick LOVES romances. pretty much every character gets paired up with someone in the original series (percy and annabeth, grover and juniper, even Clarisse and Chris) which is fab thank u rick for my percabeth rights but Luke is the only character who does not get a girlfriend!! because he’s a homosexual!!!! you know what other character didn’t get paired off in the original series??? NICO, a known homo!!!  i do think that luke is a case of “accidentally written homo” because this was before rick saved the world and gave us nico’s coming out and really started pushing for queer rep in the books (thank u again rick!!!!), so I’m allowed to find my gay subtext in the original series, thank u very much!

listen all im saying is that my favorite character narrative is “angry gay coded villain who is repressing and lashing out at the world because of it” and i truly believe luke fits into that narrative and I stand by my argument.

Thank u for attending my TED Talk