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#what do you think???
lineffability · 1 year
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some thoughts on Aziraphale, the Metatron and performances
i do think we're maybe all underestimating aziraphale just a bit when it comes to the whole 'happy in heaven, let's go and do good' spiel. i DO think he believes in some fundamental goodness in heaven despite all their obvious, glaring moral failings and problems, and i DO believe he wants crowley with him more than anything (and, misguidedly, that a part of crowley would want to go back)
BUT i also think that there is a lot more going on underneath the surface. he might wear his heart on his sleeve most of the time but we have seen that when it counts he can be really really good at magic tricks (makes that flashback all the more relevant, too), at repressing his true feelings, at building walls around himself and hiding behind a facade of smiles and optimism.
the Metatron might not be the only one performing; him and Aziraphale are certainly both on edge. think of the coffee scene, az being overwhelmed and reluctant, he is not necessarily buying the Nice Old Man act--but he is not sure about it being fake, either. maybe the metatron is nice, he can't tell, he is overwhelmed and accepts the coffee. he wants to believe that this Very High Being, the voice of god, is good. if he isn't--what then? his beliefs have been crumbling around him already, and he is scared. and then meta removes him from the bookshop, from crowley, and they talk.
Az is extremely flustered when he tries to tell crowley about the metatron's offer, a bit too much--coupled with off-the-charts-nervosity and the glimpses of Expressions of Dread on his face when he turns away from Metatrash before he goes back into the bookshop to talk to crowley, i'm starting to be quite sure that the very obvious threat lingering underneath metatron's words did not go unnoticed at all; he saw the nice kind old man smile but he heard him saying "i've gone back over your exploits", i know exactly what you've been doing these millenia, you can fool the archangels but you can't fool me, i have access to Time/History/Reality in a different way. i know everything you did. and then the threat about not allowing the two of them to work togther anymore in the future, if he stays on earth. i think aziraphale knows right then and there that he has no choice at all. (this is why he so desperately wants crowley to come with him, because he can't stay) (i do believe that he truly thinks, though, that they would let crowley back into heaven-- which i think was a total ruse, a complete lie based on the knowledge that crowley would not accept the offer)
and he knows that metatron is just outside the bookshop, waiting. now don't get me wrong, i'm not saying he acted the whole thing, the conversation he and crowley had was very real, because az was counting on crowley to come with him--because if one thing has been true over all these milennia, it's that crowley always caves in. no matter what, he comes back, he apologizes, he refuses first and accepts finally, he stays by his side, he would never leave aziraphale. right?
in this moment az needs to believe two things: 1 crowley will come with him and 2 he can do Good in heaven, they can change things together. and this is not only naiveté (though to some extent it surely is) but calculation, as well. i can't get out of this. my only choice is to rejoin heaven and play along. maybe if i'm there, if i have a seat at the divine table and can learn about heaven's plans, maybe i can thwart them, if need be. i do think az is not going in blindly, i do think he knows to some extent what awaits him, but he also truly believes that maybe he can alter things, in some way (he could, surely, with crowley. crowley always has the best ideas. i need you. )
but when crowley refuses he can't tell him there is something bad going on. i need to do this, even if i dont want to. they are not alone. he can only say i need you with me. please. but crowley is in too much pain, he feels betrayed, because he did not hear come with me but to heaven, and the shock of it runs deep
so az IS also heartbrken and angry and betrayed. and then, after the Revelation, in shock. the journey on his face was longer than the ride up to heaven jfc. and then it settles on a smile that does not reach his eyes. oh, he's really in it now. he contains multitudes and paradoxes aghhhh but yeah tl;dr aziraphale loves to be a happy trusting ray of sunshine because he chooses to be, but he is not stupid. he's doing the best he can.
there will be a second coming not only for jesus 2.0 but for his and crowley's relationship as well!! let's believe in him!!! im disinegrating i need to stop now
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marauderswolf22 · 10 months
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okay so maybe that's just my vision but im starting to feel that most of us are concentrating on how walburga was a horrible parent, forgetting that orion was a problem too. imo, walburga would do all the unethical punishments, have enormeously high standards and have an absolutely no remorse in doing all of these, but at least you could see her emotions. she would be mad, almost all the time but clearly. she could be cold, disappointed or even proud (of only herself). orion was worse. he would just sit in the corner, watching the pure evil smirring into walls of this house with his heart cold like a stone. if anything, he would look just disheartened and nothing else
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softshuji · 1 month
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I was mad and annoyed so I went and made a bracelet in my favourite colour
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3lji · 1 year
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am just wondering if there’s a reason to manoeuvre the characters into he cheng’s home? like for the story logically if we think about it what could bringing them here open up as possibilities to further the story?
i’d be really interested to see conversations between he tian and he cheng or mo guan shan? maybe something will be said?! i was just thinking OX usually has this way of leading us to important things through funny episodes lol. i just wouldn’t be surprised if something happened there? am i right in thinking that he tian usually is very difficult to get to go see his brother or is it more his father he’s reluctant to go to?
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reyrauchu · 1 year
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Desert Duo???
I finally got away from all the festivals and was able to sit down to paint something new and WOULD YOU LIKE THIS???? I'M PROUD OF IT.
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Full 16 hours job here! IM PROUD (and i will print it soon and maybe make charms???)
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tereferka · 22 days
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I'm wondering... if I should share my silly drawings from recent months? All of those are just scribbles or total trash and I couldn't consider them as anything 'good enough' to post. But it's just a Tumblr, right? Maybe I shouldn't stress about it so much
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evansbby · 4 months
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In WG, Ari almost says I love you to reader. Does he really mean it or was he just thinking about saying it placate her? 👀
😏😏😏😏😏
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gojonanami · 5 months
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SAB SAB SAB HAVE YOU LISTENED TO "CASUAL" BY CHAPPELL ROAN???????
you could write such a good angst fic themed around it
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omg I hadn’t but now I’m like 👀
this is giving me serious toji vibes — but also maybe Sukuna 🫣
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rippedstitch-s · 9 months
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do you like lee or do you like like lee... asking for a friend.
Can only answer in yes or no? Huh. "Yes...?"
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@leemalkovich
ASK ANYTHING, I CAN ONLY RESPOND WITH YES OR NO - ASA // VAL // MARS // OZ // GUS // MAL
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gommih · 10 months
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What do you think about dirt
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I guess I like dirt?
What about you?
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The Odds (2018)
"I love you."
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greelin · 1 year
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blood “loss”? well it’s not lost. i know exactly where it went. right over there.
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bookwyrminspiration · 2 months
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I can behave normally around books
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surkeart · 1 year
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be free!!
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creed-of-cats · 3 months
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"If voting changed anything they wouldn't let people do it-" grabs your face THEY DIDN'T JUST "LET" PEOPLE DO IT, MOST PEOPLE COULDN'T VOTE FOR HUNDREDS OF YEARS. PEOPLE OF COLOR ONLY GOT THE FULL RIGHT TO VOTE 50 YEARS AGO IN THE US, THATS BARELY A GENERATION.
IF IT DIDNT MATTER AT ALL WHY WOULD THEY SPEND SO MUCH TIME GERRYMANDERING THE SHIT OUT OF EVERYWHERE?? WHY CAN'T FELONS VOTE?? WHY CANT PUERTO RICO VOTE? WHY DO THEY KEEP SWITCHING DATES AND LAWS AND TIMES AND WHATEVER THEY POSSIBLY CAN TO STOP PEOPLE FROM VOTING?? WHY DO THEY MAKE EFFORT AT ALL??
BEING DISILLUSIONED IS A REASONABLE RESPONSE. BUT PEOPLE FOUGHT AND DIED AND ARE STILL FUCKING DYING FOR THAT RIGHT, DONT SPIT IN THEIR FACE.
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dirtytransmasc · 11 months
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the men and boys are innocent too.
we cry "the innocent women and children" to appeal to the masses, to try and force their sympathy, but the men and boys are innocent too.
I have seen sons crying out for their mothers, their fathers, their siblings. I have seen them break down at the loss of their families. I have seen them cling to their dead and grieve.
I have seen fathers cradle their dead children, seen them kiss their faces and hold their little hands. I have seen them faint with grief when asked to identify the dead. I have seen them carry their sons and daughters. I have seen them fasting to provide what little they can for their families.
I have seen men and boys digging through the rubble with just their bare hands, I have seen them comforting strangers, playing with children, rocking them, hushing them, even if the face of such imminent danger. I have seen them cry, seen them grieve, seen them break down into each other's arms, seen them be selfless, beyond selfless, becoming something I don't have a word for.
I have seen the men who are doctors refuse to leave their patients, even when they have no medicine or supplies to give them, even when they're threatened with bombings. I have seen fathers who have lost all their children pick orphans up into their arms and proclaim them their child so they are not alone. I have seen men and boys digging pets out of the rubble.
the men are innocent too. the men and boys are being hurt and killed too. the men and boys are grieving too. the men and boys are scared too. the men and boys are fighting to save their people too. the men and boys deserve to be fought for too.
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