#what a los3r

[chyeyuj]

@erinjeans :

[askshoutyasshole]

OKAY, I’VE NEVER DONE THIS SHIT BEFORE SO LET’S JUST GET THIS BULGE GRATINGLY AWKWARD INTRODUCTION POST OUT OF THE WAY

AS THE AUTHOR OF BASICALLY YOUR ENTIRE EXISTENCE (YOU’RE WELCOME FOR THAT, BY THE WAY), I’VE TAKEN IT UPON MYSELF TO MAKE A BLOG TO INFORM YOU ALL HOW FUCKING STONE COLD MORONIC YOU ALL ARE.  AND ALSO TO ANSWER QUESTIONS YOU MAY HAVE TOO, I GUESS. MOSTLY, IT’S THE FORMER. BECAUSE I’VE WITNESSED BASICALLY YOUR SPECIES’ ENTIRE TIMELINE, FROM THE PITIFUL BEGINNINGS TO ITS PATHETIC TERMINATION, AND LET ME TELL YOU IT’S FAR FROM MIND BLOWING. IT’S MORE AKIN TO WATCHING A SLOWLY DEFLATING BALLOON LET OUT ONE LAST, DISMAL BURST OF FLATULENCE, AS IT FINALLY SETTLES INTO ITS TRUE FORM THE THING IT WAS ALWAYS DESTINED TO BE A SAD, FLOPPY SCRAP OF RUBBER ON THE GROUND.

WHERE WAS I GOING WITH THIS?  SHIT RIGHT, THE ASK BLOG.

SINCE I SEEM TO HARBOR AN UNSHAKEABLE LOATHING FOR MYSELF AND HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO OTHER THAN SLOWLY DIE ON THIS ROCK, I FIGURED I WOULD DEIGN TO ANSWER WHATEVER QUESTIONS YOU SHITHEADS MIGHT HAVE FOR ME BECAUSE I’M ESSENTIALLY TAKING UP THE REIGNS AS NOT ONLY YOUR GOD BUT ALSO SOMEWHAT OF AN EXPERT ON ALL OF YOUR DEEPLY ROOTED FLAWS AND FAILINGS AS A SPECIES.

AND IF YOU’RE NOT A HUMAN... I DON’T GIVE A FLYING FUCK ACTUALLY, GO NUTS. SEND ME AN ASK ANYWAY.  ASIDE FROM DISHING OUT WELL-DESERVED FUCK YOUS, I CAN ALSO BESTOW MY FRANKLY SUPERIOR OPINIONS ON CINEMA AND GIVE ADVICE ON QUADRANTS, SINCE I’M ALSO A FUCKING SAVANT AT ROMANCE.

AND UH... YEAH. DO WHATEVER THE FUCK YOU WANT WITH THIS, I DON’T CARE.

H4H4H4H4H4 K4RK4T, OH MY GOD, YOUR3 4CTU4LLY M4K1NG TH4T BLOG??

SHUT THE FUCK UP TEREZI! YOU’RE HEREBY BANNED FROM EVER SHOWING YOUR SHITEATING GRIN ON MY BLOG. SUUUR333  L1K3 TH4TLL STOP M3 >;] HEY, WHAT ARE YOU- AGH!

H3Y LOS3RS! YOU SHOULD TOT4LLY SUBM1T 4SKS FOR M3 4ND US OTH3R TROLLS TOO S1NC3 W3 4R3 4LL *CL34RLY* MOR3 1NT3R3ST1NG TH4N NUBBY HORN3D K4RK4T  Hey! She has good a point. :::)  I Think I Am Good

FUCK OFF! *NONE* OF YOU OBNOXIOUS SHITHEADS ARE ALLOWED ON MY BLOG! DON’T ACTUALLY SEND ASKS FOR THEM, *PLEASE*.

WELL, YOU’RE NOT OBNOXIOUS KANAYA. YOU CAN MAKE SOME GUEST APPEARANCES IF YOU’D LIKE.  I Believe I Made Myself Clear On My State Of Contentment In Not Being Involved Whatsoever But I Suppose I Wouldnt Mind Showing Up A Couple Times

ANYWAY, I’D LIKE TO REITERATE THIS IS *MY* BLOG. NOT A SPACE TO PLATFORM PUTRID JACKASSES AND THEIR GOD-BARFING REPUGNANT OPINIONS.

K4RK4T! 1F TH4TS TH3 C4S3 TH3N WHY 4R3 YOU T4LK1NG?

FJKLSFDRGJLK;DFGRO;IUJ D RIOUG FUCK YOU, INTRODUCTORY POST OVER.

[kissyouallaway]

six songs I've been liking... thank u to @9cl for recommending this to me

My friend sent me this song cause bleachblonde sampled it and like oh my god it's so fucking good I can't even begin to start talking about it just that riff with the room mic vocals AND THAT FUCKING CHORUS LIKE OH MY GOD NEVER A WASTE OF MY TIIIIIIME it's such a sad song and it really reminds me a lot of my past like when I was a Rochester indie emo kid at age 15 recording folk music in my bedroom but idk it's different it doesn't make me feel bad in the same way like listening to the stuff from back then makes me feel (like I'm going to slip back to that time period and fall into depression again.) good song tho

couture23/Remy cechovic/instagram_filter is one of my favorite artists with more good songs than I can remember but this one in particular sticks out to me, teks part is good but god Remy's verse with the delivery being so quiet and almost shy over such an emotive and dense beat with the lyrics "going from swingsets and basketball courts to being sat in a room, being told all the rules" it's so nostalgic and sad and just heartwrenching it just makes me want to cry

Lucy is another one of my favorite artists, his style is so unique and his like vocal style is so versatile it's crazy... his imagery and the words he chooses to use in his lyrics feel almost old timey in a way...idk really how to put it other than that but it makes me think of my old orthodontists office that I used to go to when I was 8 that was completely decked out in sea themed everything, just something about it... also I love the video with him throwing the minion plush around while singing :)

herstory is someone who I actually know on here as well as a super insanely talented producer and singer... I love all of his songs and stuff with the band los3r but this one in particular is super fukn good, the vocals feeling like a cry out over the guitar and just exploding into that last section I mean like come on it's fucking incredible

cg is another rly cool person I know from social media as well as a good rapper... the beat in this song feels really loose and like it's barely holding itself together it's really cool, the pluck sound I really love too lol... I also love the line "I feel like stewie griffin with the cool whip"

I don't even know where to begin with this song... the whole composition is so fucking insane and beautiful, the first part with the mp3 compression and click sound feels like what the first day of snow in winter always feels like 2 me idk how to put it... and the lyrics "don't take me home tonight, I'm not feeling right, stumbling towards the light" paint a very specific picture in my head that I've actually tried to draw before.. in late winter to early spring I went through an almost total mental collapse where I was constantly afraid and super fucking angry and suicidal and was having awful mood swings where I wasnt able to cope with living for much longer cause it brought me so much pain emotionally, and this whole song feels like what that kind of fear felt like...kinda paranoia but not really there's kinda anger in it but also feeling like you're alone and super vulnerable and it's just oh my god the part at 1:38 fucking chills down my spine every time I think it's my favorite song right now it's brutal and soul crushing and just too much to put into words...

I would like 2 nominate @findingtheanecdote to do one next

[skrunglebeasts]

i was possessed and wrote this whole ass thing after reading about who was in the finals for @coolesthscharacter

TEREZI: TH1S H4S B33N 4 COLLOS4L W4ST3 OF T1M3. ROSE: Agreed. TEREZI: UNO ROSE: Swap card. Give me your hand. TEREZI: B1TCH TEREZI: DONT BOTH3R. YOU W1N ROSE: On two fronts. Looks like the poll lines up perfectly with the results of our little time waster. TEREZI: OF COURS3 TH3Y D1D TEREZI: 1M L34V1NG ROSE: Don't enjoy yourself too much. I'll be moving on to hand the win over to Roxy. ROSE: Not that she deserves it any more than I do, but I figure it'll be a kind gesture. TEREZI: H4V3 FUN W1TH TEREZI: HUH ROSE: What? TEREZI: DONT M1ND M3 TEREZI: 1 JUST SM3LL SOM3TH1NG FUNNY TEREZI: H3H3H3H3H3 >:] ROSE: Ominous. ROSE: I'll see you later. TEREZI: 1 WONT ROSE: Aren't we past blind jokes? TEREZI: Aren't we past typing quirks? ROSE: Don't… ROSE: Do that. ROSE: It's weird. TEREZI: TH4TS K1ND OF MY WHOL3 TH1NG TEREZI: L4T3R LOS3R

Rose and Terezi exit in opposite directions, not bothering to spare a backward glance. Terezi's chipper mood bothers Rose for only the briefest second before she puts it out of her head. The troll loves mind games.

As she steps into the next room for the final contest, she considers a dozen different metanarrative consequences of this sort of contest and what that means for the continuity of everything. When the contest ends does she disappear? Is she shunted into the ultimate self who's story will never be completed? What does it mean for her to have even gotten this far, beating out even Davesprite. Has the cultural gestalt really shifted so much that a sad ghost boy version of Dave is no longer appealing? And is shs to be considered seperately from each of the entities that embody her? What is she? Who is…

Wait.

A silhouetted figure stands against the lights of the inexplicable room. A single blue light shines from the head…

ROSE: Is that fucking Sans? SANS?: nope!!!

The figure steps forward from the convenient shadowing and reveals a familiar, red-clad troll with a messy mass of black hair. In her hands is a skull with a blue light shining from the socket that Aradia is using to obscure her face. Rose sighs, a bit annoyed Roxy hadn't made it here. Of course this is what Terezi thought was funny.

ROSE: Hello, Aradia. ARADIA: hi rose

Her chipper tone is punctuated by the sound of the skull hitting the ground as she tosses it aside.

ARADIA: funny, right? ROSE: A little played out, honestly. ARADIA: come on. you of all people shouldnt say anything about "played out"~ ARADIA: your post-canon arc is just copying the one i had as a starting point and recycling it ARADIA: not that i mind! ARADIA: i find it flattering ARADIA: after all my old story has good ARADIA: b0nes ARADIA: to build on ROSE: Make up your mind about how you're supposed to sound. ARADIA: hmmm ARADIA: n0pe 

Aradia puffs out a breath to blow some of her curling hair out of her face.

ARADIA: So did you have fun getting here? ROSE: Not really. ROSE: Your ancestor flirted aggressively with me, then got mad that I called her boring. ARADIA: yours was very nice and quite interesting ARADIA: shes both very cool and very much a dork ARADIA: i can see where you and dave get it ROSE: Hey. ARADIA: though you clearly take more after dirk so you got a higher percentage of dork genes ROSE: … ROSE: Moving on. ROSE: Vriska was Vriska about the whole thing and got upset that no amount of luck could save her from being the icon of Homestuck's ire. ARADIA: i dont think thats what it was at all ARADIA: maybe she was boring, too ARADIA: after all ARADIA: how can you find anything exciting about someone who has done nothing wrong? :) ROSE: … ARADIA: 0u0 ROSE: … ROSE: Okay. ROSE: Well. ROSE: Sollux didn't really want to interact with me and spent the whole time with headphones on and listening to a podcast. ARADIA: hehe, sounds like him ROSE: Davesprite was monumentally awkward and seemed to be in the midst of a breakdown about not being "really real" because Davepetasprite^2 was in the running. ARADIA: sounds like him, too ARADIA: first mistake of anything like this is attempting to apply any level of canonicity to it ARADIA: better to just calm down and enjoy yourself ARADIA: but i suppose he wouldnt be davesprite or any kind of dave at all if he didnt appeal to the sad boy loving demographic ROSE: Are you going to keep interrupting me? ARADIA: probably ROSE: I played Uno with Terezi. ROSE: That's it. ARADIA: neat! ROSE: Let me return the question: Did you have fun getting here? ARADIA: i did! ROSE: … ROSE: Any details? ARADIA: no ARADIA: ill leave those to your imagination ;) ROSE: That's a copout answer and you know it. ARADIA: youd be surprised ARADIA: a little goes a long way ARADIA: lets focus on the now ARADIA: how do you want to do this, rose? ARADIA: among the multitudes of possibilities, the many threads that spread out before us ARADIA: which do you wish to solidify as true? ROSE: Maybe I don't want to pick. ROSE: Maybe I also want that to be left to the imagination. ARADIA: then ill pick! ROSE: What ROSE: But ROSE: Your entire continued existence hinges on one fact and that is that you are a voyeur. A perverted observer who has no interest in dirtying your own mitts as you passively allow the narrative to continue on it's way. You do not intervene. You don't take action.

She screws up her face in baffled disgust and stabs one finger in the air toward Aradia.

ROSE: You don't choose.

Aradia's persistent, placid smile widens slightly. It still doesn't reach her eyes.

ARADIA: not choosing is a choice ARADIA: i think thats something youve always struggled with ARADIA: a lot of people do ARADIA: choosing no action at all is still an action ARADIA: existence itself comes packaged with the burden of existing ARADIA: by simply being you are acting ARADIA: your existence means nothing ARADIA: your actions are meaningless ARADIA: but they are actions nonetheless

She turns on one foot, kicking off to float up and rotate gently and slowly in the air, as if attempting a slow motion pirouette. The languid motion controlled and beautiful. It makes Rose want to throw something at her just to ruin the image in the same way a child wants to crack a perfect sheet of ice just to see it come apart. ARADIA: and my choice has always been pretty transparent ROSE: Bullshit. ROSE: Your motivations, your reasoning, your purposes. All of that has always been obfuscated. You hide behind platitudes and more plot critical figures, but you never seem to be willing to show your hand. No one knows what your fucking deal is. ARADIA: hehehe ARADIA: thats just plain wrong ARADIA: ive destroyed more lives to save a single session than you could imagine in both your attempts to break yours or to do whatever it is you were doing with dirk ARADIA: ive been a ghost, a ghost frog, a robot ARADIA: even in that period of time you say i only observed i still decided to fight lord english for the fun of it ARADIA: and i lived :) ARADIA: what happened when a version of you tried to attack lord english? ROSE: Mgh. ARADIA: theres a reason im here ROSE: And what reason is that? ARADIA: same as it ever was

Aradia floats up, arcing her back until she's hanging upside down, arms and legs hanging limply. She's still smiling. It still doesn't reach her eyes.

ARADIA: i mostly want to see what happens when this whole place breaks apart. :) ROSE: … ROSE: I want to kick your ass. ARADIA: then do it ARADIA: or dont ARADIA: either way ARADIA: i think youre gonna have a bad time ARADIA: CUE MY FIGHT MUSIC! ROSE: You motherfucker.

[pesterloglog]

Terezi Pyrope, John Egbert, Gamzee Makara, Eridan Ampora, Feferi Peixes, Roxy Lalonde, Calliope

Candy, page 22

TEREZI: H3Y JOHN

TEREZI: T1M3 FOR YOUR R3GUL4R CH3CKUP H3H3H3

JOHN: oh. hey.

TEREZI: “OH H3Y”

TEREZI: PR3TTY T3P1D R3C3PT1ON FROM 4 GUY WHO H4S 1N TH3 P4ST B3GG3D D3SP3R4T3LY FOR 3V3N 4 SCR4P OF MY 4TT3NT1ON

JOHN: i’m glad to hear from you. it’s just... i dunno, a lot’s happened recently.

JOHN: i’m sort of numb from all of it.

TEREZI: SO T3LL M3 4BOUT 1T

JOHN: what are you my therapist now?

TEREZI: NO 1M JUST 4 S1MPL3 G1RL WHO LOV3S TH3 T4ST3 OF YOUR SUFF3R1NG

TEREZI: 1M SO HUNGRY OUT H3R3 4LON3 1N P4R4DOX SP4C3 JOHN

TEREZI: PL34S3 NOUR1SH M3 W1TH YOUR P4TH3T1C M1DL1FE 3NNU1

JOHN: it’s not midlife ennui!

JOHN: i’m not even thirty yet, come on.

JOHN: also... um.

JOHN: i’m married? so... yeah.

TEREZI: LOL

TEREZI: WH4T DO3S TH4T H4V3 TO DO W1TH 4NYTH1NG

JOHN: err...

JOHN: nevermind.

JOHN: so what’s up with you?

TEREZI: OH S4M3 OLD S4M3 OLD

TEREZI: WH4T 4R3 YOU DO1NG R1GHT NOW

JOHN: oh. i’m at harry anderson’s birthday party.

TEREZI: SOUNDS 1MPORT4NT

TEREZI: M4YB3 1 SHOULD L3T YOU GO TH3N

JOHN: no!

JOHN: i mean... it’s fine. i can talk for a bit.

TEREZI: 4ND L34V3 H4RRY 4ND3RSON H4NG1NG?

TEREZI: WOW 3GB3RT

TEREZI: YOUD TH1NK 4N 3LD3RLY M4N L1K3 YOU WOULD KNOW MOR3 4BOUT D3CORUM TH4N M3, 4 ROWDY YOUTH!

JOHN: harry anderson is basically just a baby who doesn’t understand anything.

JOHN: a baby, kind of like YOU.

TEREZI: >:]

TEREZI: SO WHOS H4RRY 4ND3RSON?

JOHN: oh! that’s me and roxy’s son.

TEREZI: OH COOL H3 GOT BORN

JOHN: yeah terezi. he got born like three years ago.

TEREZI: 1TS B33N TH4T LONG?

TEREZI: WOW

JOHN: yeah, wow is right. where the hell have you been?

TEREZI: LOST

JOHN: lost... how?

JOHN: like literally, physically lost?

JOHN: or metaphorically lost.

TEREZI: BOTH 1 GU3SS

JOHN: terezi...

TEREZI: OH NO

TEREZI: DONT YOU D4R3 US3 P1TY1NG 3LL1PS3S 4T M3 JOHN 3GB3RT

JOHN: sorry! it’s kinda hard not to when every time you go i have no idea if i’ll ever talk to you again.

TEREZI: OK YOUR3 OBV1OUSLY NOT 1N 4 PL4C3 TO T4LK R1GHT NOW

TEREZI: 1 D1DNT CONT4CT YOU B3C4US3 1 W4NT3D TO D34L W1TH YOUR W33PY S3P4R4T1ON ANX13TY

TEREZI: HOW 4BOUT 1 M4K3 TH1S 34SY FOR YOU 4ND JUST LOG OFF

JOHN: no, please don’t go!

JOHN: i’m sorry for being all... human and weepy.

JOHN: i’m actually in a pretty ok place for once, i think?

TEREZI: C4LM DOWN 1 W4SNT F1N1SH3D

TEREZI: L1ST3N... 1LL T3XT YOU B4CK 1N F1V3 M1NUT3S

TEREZI: TH4TLL G1V3 YOU SOM3 T1M3 TO 3MOT1ON4LLY PROC3SS THE H4RROW1NG 3XP3R13NC3 OF 4CTU4LLY H34R1NG FROM M3 4G41N >:]

JOHN: promise me it’ll only be five minutes?

TEREZI: WHY?

JOHN: because i worry about you!

JOHN: i just don’t want you to leave me hanging for another year, making me wonder if you’re dead.

JOHN: please??

TEREZI: UGH!

TEREZI: F1N3

TEREZI: 1 H3R3BY SOL3MNLY SW34R UPON TH3 BOOK OF DUMB N33DY LOS3RS TH4T 1 W1LL T3XT YOU 1N *3X4CTLY* F1V3 M1NUT3S

JOHN: whew. THANK you!

TEREZI: OK 1TS F1V3 M1NUT3S L4T3R

TEREZI: DONT T3LL M3 4NOTH3R TWO SW33PS H4V3 P4SS3D

JOHN: nah, just a couple of weeks.

JOHN: oh boy, what a couple of weeks though.

JOHN: you would NOT believe what’s happening right now.

TEREZI: H4V3 1 3V3R NOT B3L13V3D WH4T W4S H4PP3N1NG WH3N YOU S41D 1 WOULDNT?

JOHN: no, but to be fair this one is especially wild.

JOHN: here wait, let me take a picture.

-- JOHN EGBERT sent TEREZI PYROPE the photo “ghostrain.jpg” --

TEREZI: WH4T TH3 4CTU4L FUCK

JOHN: it started a few days ago. the sky above the capital of the troll kingdom just cracked open and ghosts began raining down everywhere.

JOHN: actually, now that i think about it, i guess it started three years ago when a dead teen version of jade fell from the sky and crashed into the ground during a picnic.

TEREZI: HUH

JOHN: that only affected our group though. this whole thing with the troll ghosts has been a *huge* international incident.

JOHN: the political situation surrounding trolls was already tense enough without adding a gigantic population of immigrant ghost trolls to the mix.

TEREZI: W41T, WH4T H4PP3N3D?

JOHN: um, well... because of what we know about alternian history...

JOHN: the government decided it was probably a bad idea to let trolls reproduce freely, especially considering how different our planet is from alternia.

TEREZI: 1 SUPPOS3 TH4T M4K3S S3NS3

TEREZI: W1THOUT ST4T3 S4NCT1ON3D CULL1NG, TH3 TROLL POPUL4T1ON WOULD QU1CKLY DOM1N4T3 TH3 PL4N3T

TEREZI: 4ND 34RTH C DO3SNT STR1K3 ME 4S TH3 SORT OF PL4C3 TH4T WOULD T4K3 K1NDLY TO 4 LOT OF CULL1NG

JOHN: yeah. that was part of the government’s official argument.

JOHN: “it’s either this, or culling.”

JOHN: but it didn’t stop there.

JOHN: also a bunch of laws have been passed that restrict the kind of jobs that trolls can have. like, they’re not allowed to serve in the government or rise past a certain rank in the military. they can’t even be judges!

TEREZI: G4SP

JOHN: i know. it’s pretty bad here.

TEREZI: CONS1D3R1NG TH3 GO4L 1S TO L1M1T TH3 SPR34D 4ND 1NFLU3NC3 OF TROLLS, TH1S 4LL S33MS L1K3...

TEREZI: QU1T3 4N 4LT3RN14N SOLUT1ON

JOHN: well... jane is sort of a key political player now.

JOHN: she’s not “in” the government, exactly. but she has so much money she may as well BE the government.

JOHN: her company can do basically whatever it wants. and it seems more and more like what it wants is to make sure the politicians are saying exactly what it wants them to say.

TEREZI: H4

TEREZI: 1 4LW4YS SUSP3CT3D SH3D B33N SW4Y3D BY TH3 COND3SC3 MOR3 TH4N SH3 3V3R L3T ON

JOHN: yeah. i guess she was.

JOHN: although... i dunno, for some reason it doesn’t feel right to me.

JOHN: i KNEW a grown-up version of jane. she was my nanna.

JOHN: i never met her until she came back as a sprite. but she just seemed like a kindly old grandma who liked to play pranks.

JOHN: not a...

TEREZI: G3NOC1D3 F4N?

JOHN: not even close!

JOHN: i just can’t believe how fast everything deteriorated.

TEREZI: DONT T3LL M3 3V3YON3S JUST T4K1NG TH1S LY1NG DOWN

JOHN: of course not! kanaya and rose are both heavily involved in grassroots activism right now.

JOHN: and karkat...

JOHN: he’s gone completely off the grid!

JOHN: at first we all assumed that the reason he ran away was because he got fed up with his shitty poly relationship.

JOHN: which was probably part of it, honestly. but now i keep seeing his face on all the resistance posters!

JOHN: i think they may have actually put him in charge?

TEREZI: H3H

TEREZI: 1 4LW4YS KN3W H3 H4D 1T 1N H1M

JOHN: yeah!

JOHN: dave’s heartbroken though...

TEREZI: WHY DO3SNT D4V3 JUST GO 4ND JO1N H1M TH3N

JOHN: i don’t know.

JOHN: he worries about jade i guess?

TEREZI: J4D3 WOULD B3 F1N3

TEREZI: SH3S TH3 MOST R3S1L13NT OUT OF 4LL OF YOU

JOHN: sigh. you know how dave is.

TEREZI: Y34H

TEREZI: LOY4L TO 4 F4ULT

JOHN: yeah. he...

JOHN: oh my god.

JOHN: holy shit, hang on. i gotta take another picture.

-- JOHN EGBERT sent TEREZI PYROPE the photo “PBandJ.jpg” --

TEREZI: ...

TEREZI: WH4T TH3 FUCK 1S TH1S?!

JOHN: heheheheh.

TEREZI: DONT TYP3 YOUR L4UGHS 4T M3 4FT3R TR1CK1NG M3 1NTO LOOK1NG 4T TH1S 4BOMIN41TON

JOHN: i thought you might find it interesting. :-)

TEREZI: WHY WOULD 1 *3V3R* W4NT TO S33 G4MZ33 M4K1NG OUT W1TH T4VROS 4G41N???

JOHN: again?

TEREZI: UGH D1SGUST1NG

TEREZI: 1N PUBL1C 4ND 3V3RYTH1NG

JOHN: oh, it’s always in public.

JOHN: this is how gamzee helps people have their “redemption arcs.”

TEREZI: BY M4K1NG OUT W1TH TH3M???

JOHN: well, not always. sometimes he has them make out with each other. usually he just feeds them milk out of that stupid baby bottle he keeps with him all the time.

JOHN: i think it’s supposed to be like, some completely idiotic form of baptism he made up.

TEREZI: >:?

JOHN: anyway, speaking of tavros.

JOHN: what do you think about the morality of kidnapping someone if they’re really unhappy and possibly also being abused?

TEREZI: UH

TEREZI: WH4T

JOHN: ok, so like, if you kidnap someone and the situation you’re kidnapping them into is way better than the one you kidnapped them out of, that’s not morally wrong, right?

TEREZI: JOHN

TEREZI: 4R3 YOU TRY1NG TO G3T M3 4LL 4FLUST3R3D W1TH SUCH H1GHLY ILL3G4L SW33T T4LK

JOHN: um, no.

JOHN: ...

JOHN: ARE you flustered?

TEREZI: 1 M1GHT B3, 1F 1 THOUGHT YOU WOULD 4CTU4LLY BR34K TH3 L4W

JOHN: hey, i could totally do it!

TEREZI: 1LL B3L1EV3 1T WH3N 1 SM3LL 1T

JOHN: ok, i guess i’m gonna do it then!

TEREZI: SUR3

JOHN: i’m totally going to do it! next time we talk, it’ll be me telling you all about my successful and highly illegal kidnapping venture.

TEREZI: WH4T3V3R YOU S4Y

TEREZI: 4NYW4Y, N1C3 HUDDL3 3GB3RT, BUT 1 H4V3 TO GO

JOHN: wait!

TEREZI: WH4T

JOHN: you’re going already?

JOHN: you barely said anything!

JOHN: you just listened to me ramble on about earth c’s problems.

TEREZI: 1SNT TH4T HOW TH3S3 CONV3RS4T1ONS USU4LLY GO

JOHN: um.

JOHN: yeah, i guess it is.

JOHN: but it doesn’t have to be like that, you know.

TEREZI: HMM

JOHN: so.

JOHN: what’s going on with you?

TEREZI: D1D 1T OCCUR TO YOU TH4T M4YB3 TH3 R34SON 1 C4LL YOU 1S B3C4US3 1 W4NT 4 BR13F R3PR13V3 FROM “WH4TS GO1NG ON W1TH M3”?

JOHN: oh.

JOHN: yeah, that makes sense.

JOHN: i just don’t want you to feel that you’re like, my psychiatrist or whatever.

TEREZI: AWW TH4TS CUT3

TEREZI: DONT WORRY 4BOUT M3 JOHN

TEREZI: 1F YOU W3R3 BUGG1NG M3 1D JUST STOP T3XT1NG

JOHN: well...

JOHN: cool. if i’m not bugging you, then... can i ask a favor?

TEREZI: 1TS C3RT41NLY W1TH1N YOUR POW3R TO 4SK M3 4 F4VOR

TEREZI: 1 C4NT PROM1S3 TO FULF1LL 1T

JOHN: ugh, now i feel even dumber for what i’m about to ask.

JOHN: i don’t know if i even wanna do it now.

TEREZI: 4RGH! OUT W1TH 1T 3GB3RT!

JOHN: ummm...

TEREZI: F1N3! 1LL DO 1T, WH4T3V3R 1T 1S

TEREZI: JUST SO YOU C34S3 TH1S M4DD3N1NG N3RDBOY 1NS3CUR1TY

JOHN: ok, ok!

JOHN: uh...

JOHN: can you...

JOHN: take a selfie?

TEREZI: WH4T

JOHN: and... send it to me?

JOHN: oh my god, i probably sound so creepy right now.

TEREZI: 4H4H4H4H4H4H4

JOHN: hey, don’t laugh!

JOHN: look, it’s just that... after all the talking we’ve done over the years...

JOHN: you’re pretty important to me, terezi. and with everything getting so weird, i’ve been getting scared lately.

JOHN: so in case things go to shit over here, or things go to shit wherever you are...

JOHN: i just want to make sure i have something to remember you by.

TEREZI: OH

JOHN: so will you do it?

GAMZEE: NoW We wElCoMe iNtO ThE DoPe aRmS Of mOtHeR ReDeMpTiOn tHiS lOwLy PeNiTeNt WhO’s AlL kInDs Of SoRrY aBoUt HiS pAsT dEeDs.

ERIDAN: oh yeah im vvery redeemed

FEFERI: )(mm are you s)(ore?

ERIDAN: fef you dont believve me

ERIDAN: wwhat do i havve to fuckin do crawwl on the fuckin ground at your feet

ERIDAN: snortin and snufflin at your shoes like a mushroom sniffin porkfiend

ERIDAN: sizin up those covvetous swweaty delicacies stuffed wwithin

ERIDAN: like a couple of premium shrimp loavves garnished wwith ten exquisite pygmy soiree wwieners

ERIDAN: im a wworm fef

ERIDAN: im the lowwest of the wworst

FEFERI: Okaaay. If t)(at’s really )(ow you feel, i guess i can... accept your apology.

GAMZEE: NiIiIiIiCe.

GAMZEE: NoW tHiS iS wHaT i’M tAlKiNg AbOuT. AlL tHiS fOrGiVnEsS aNd ShIt Up In ThE mOtHeRfUcKiNg HoUsE.

GAMZEE: aFtEr AlL, wHaT’s A lItTlE

GAMZEE: MURDER

GAMZEE: BeTwEeN mOiRaIlS?

FEFERI: I guess t)(at’s true! It )(appens to t)(e best of us. 38)

GAMZEE: YoU bOtH aRe So ClOsE tO tHe ReDeMpTiOn NoW.

GAMZEE: fIrSt, A LiTtLe RiGhTeOuS sPlAsH oF tHe NaNnA nEcTaR tO cLeAnSe ThAt DaNkNeSs FrOm YoUr SoUlS...

GAMZEE: NoW...

GAMZEE: kIsS, mY mOtHeRfUcKeRs.

FEFERI: Ummmm...

ERIDAN: FINALLY

ERIDAN: pucker up fef and plant one on me

FEFERI: 38\

ERIDAN: you gotta its the rules

GAMZEE: tHe MoThErFuCkEr’S rIgHt.

GAMZEE: It AlL bE fUcKiN cRiTiCaL tO bOtH yOuR rEdEmPtIoN, tO kIsS aNd MaKe Up :o)

FEFERI: Sig)(. If it’s for redemption, t)(en...

FEFERI: Very well.

ERIDAN: oh fuck yeah

ERIDAN: RUB A DUB DUB COME GIMME A GLUB!!!

-- TEREZI PYROPE sent JOHN EGBERT the photo “H3R3.JPG” --

ROXY: yo john

ROXY: over here hon!

CALLIOPE: it’s getting less and less UnUsUal to see those in the troll kingdom, isn’t it?

JOHN: yeah.

JOHN: i can’t help but think the government’s getting ready for something big.

ROXY: lmao you worry too much

ROXY: janeys got her head on straight shell show you yet

JOHN: ugh, let’s not talk about this right now.

ROXY: yea ur right

ROXY: its gettin late anyway we should head home

ROXY: see you next week callie?

CALLIOPE: oh. yes. always, roxy.

[lovesickjily]

present: me

Summary: When Lily Evans is assigned to be a stranger's Secret Santa, she has no idea that by the end of the night, she was the gift that James Potter had wanted the entire time.

give me some love on ao3 or ffn

okay hi merry christmas!!! sorry this fic may sound a bit rushed, but i really wanted to finish this by christmas and i did it? i hope you all enjoy xxx

There were, as Lily speculated, many feelings that people felt when it came to the topic of Christmastime, a time in which everyone showed their love towards friends and family through the gifting and receiving of presents that consequently caused them to end up with so little money that would bring Santa to tears.

Feelings of mirth and joy were expected on the holiday that foresaw snow, but frustration? She didn’t expect any of that days before Christmas.

It wasn’t that Lily hated watching her bank account come to a horrible decline during this season, because the one thing that she absolutely loved more than receiving gifts was buying them. She revelled in watching the eyes of such gift recipients, especially when they lit up like a Christmas tree, and it made her money deficit well worth it.

With Mary, who was known for her embodiment of the concept ‘the more the merrier,’ it was easy to find a gift for her, whether it was one based on sentimentality or one where the price tag had been taken off of it, Mary accepted anything and everything, so long as it wasn’t unattractive in design and form. With Petunia, who was one for the traditional gifts, it wasn’t difficult to find an expensive vase from online that appealed to those who prided themselves in outdoing every single one of their neighbours. She bought an expensive watch for Petunia’s husband, because it seemed like a good gift simply because of the price. Whether he decided to sell it or keep it was honestly up to him, though she hoped very well that it wouldn’t end up rotting in one of his sock drawers.

Now, shopping for a stranger was something entirely on its own.

She’d no idea what Remus had been thinking to invite her to a party where she knew only one person and was even more confused when everyone was assigned a person at random to bring a gift to. From the conversations in the group chat that she had been added to, she could tell that everyone else knew one another well enough, if one could conclude from the jabs that ‘Prongs’ and ‘Padfoot’ continuously sent towards one another.

Eventually, that chat was put on mute, and she’d told Remus— as well as Sirius Black, who was apparently the host of the party— to inform her of any updates about the party. Asking the latter, it seemed, had turned out to be a poor decision on her part, because it seemed as if his sole intent on living was to pester her to the point that she often found her finger hovering over the ‘block contact’ button, only to stop since he unfortunately was the host. There was also the fact that clicking such a simple button was probably exactly what he wanted, and she was definitely not going to let this stranger win.

The last thing that she wanted was to show up in front of his house and be greeted with an infuriatingly cocky on his face.

On the other hand, the first thing that she wanted now at this very moment was to know what exactly to get whoever this ‘James Potter’ person wanted for a gift, but asking Constellation Boy only resulted in responses such as “He wants you for Christmas” with an absurd amount of winking faces.

If she was to browse the Internet in search of gifts to give to strangers, what if there was the chance that he was also her Secret Santa and was on that very same website?

No, she was going to put her utmost creativity into this gift, whatever it may be.

The only question was how she was going to do that.

She couldn’t exactly throw some sentimental value into it, not when there was no sentimental value to be thrown in the first place, but she didn’t want to at all give him something cheaply overdone, like an expensive bottle of perfume or wine. There were rules about gifts, and there was unanimous agreement that one should never get a person such items for Christmas— that is, unless their name was Vernon Dursley.

It was in these moments that she’d taken advantage of the annoying group chat— currently named “Jingle My Balls,” and she could bet all the toys in the world on who had decided to name it that— to scour for any valuable information that could give her an idea of what James Potter had an interest in.

Deer, it seemed.

Lots and lots and lots of deer.

She couldn’t understand his obvious fixation for deer and its venison counterparts, but she sincerely hoped that Remus wasn’t acquainted with someone who prided himself in the slaughtering of deer just for the fun of it. It could help to explain his ridiculous nickname, and she’d almost roped herself into believing that Remus Lupin was the only sane one in their friend group, only to learn that he had been named for a reason that could only be related to the act of mooning.

If she were to get James some sort of food for Christmas, it surely was not going to be of the venison sort.

Perhaps she’d bake cookies for him and call it a day, but they didn’t last forever, not unless he decided to preserve it for reasons unbeknownst to her, and she wanted to create a lasting first impression on him.

James Potter, what in the world could you want?

Could he be interested in pottery, if one could go by his last name?

Obviously, she wasn’t going to put minimal effort into his gift, and he obviously was far from a Petunia, so a ceramic vase— no matter how expensive it was— was just not going to make do. There was nothing wrong with homemade items, and she’d actually greatly prefer homemade objects over the store-bought pieces.

Perhaps…?

Hopefully, he’d love what she had planned for him.

The final obstacle remaining was that she’d never in her life taken a pottery class.

+++

There was a difference between going all out and doing exactly what it was that this household had seemed to do when it came for Christmas decorations.

Lily liked to think that she fell in the former category, having decorated nearly every inch of her flat with pretty fairy lights and a giant Christmas tree in the corner of every room, and even the bathroom contained a small Christmas tree resting atop the counter. Tinsel lined the tops of the mock fireplace in their living room, and in every part of the flat, there was some Christmas decoration of some sort.

But this house— mansion?

It was on a completely different spectrum of its own.

The front lawn seemed as if it had taken everything that could be seen in the Christmas outdoor section featured at every store, and in places where snow hadn’t fallen, fake snow was used to create the illusion that the place was a magical castle in a kingdom where winter was eternal. There were, of course, a line of deer made entirely out of lights lining up the pathway, and at the very end stood a dog made of lights and a pair of antlers atop the animal.

If she had any doubts about whether or not she’d come to the right place, then these doubts were put at ease.

“This is the place,” she said to Mary, though it came out more as a question rather than anything else.

“The one and only.”

“Are you sure we aren’t— I don’t know— planning a heist? Following the plot of the Bling Ring?”

“Maybe next time,” Mary said nonchalantly, “But I don’t see why you should when you’re being offered free food here. Remember, stay safe, and please bring me a plate of whatever food they have there.”

With one last look, Mary gave her a reassuring beam as she bent down to begin her search party, as her phone had fallen off of the dashboard and slid off to who knows where. It ultimately meant that she was going to dawdle in the car for an unreasonable amount of time because she didn’t want to step out into the cold so quickly, as it was just characteristic of Mary to do stay in her comfort zone for as long as she deemed possible. It was for that reason that Lily decided to knock at the door before the frosty air could hold her captive as well.

The door thankfully opened quickly, and amidst the sweet smell of cookies and all the positivity that embodied Christmas, she caught sight of, well, reindeer. It wasn’t off-putting that it was reindeer. It was off-putting that it was reindeer. Atop each other.

She wasn’t being subjected to real-live reindeer, of course, as they were graphics that appeared on the sweater of some bloke bold enough to wear it to the party. If the sweater hadn’t had the reindeer engaged in such an illicit act, it probably could have been a lovely sweater.

They could have matched, actually, because she was wearing a sweater similar to his, the only main difference being the fact that her deer were nowhere near one another, and hers was mainly black while his was mainly blue.

She felt her eyebrows furrowing in confusion at the sight, and she blinked twice. “You must be James.”

She’d finally managed to tear her eyes away from the deer to look up at him, and she’d nearly fallen onto her knees at the fact that he was so attractive to the point that he absolutely had to know how attractive he was. It didn’t help that there was a pair of antlers atop his head, and they only served to draw attention to his messy hair, hair wild enough to make her thoughts wander off into territory that they shouldn’t have stumbled upon in the first place.

And then her gaze flickered right back to his sweater, where the reindeer seemed to be mocking her.

It was only then that he’d been able to somewhat redeem himself when he opened his mouth, and how how how could a voice be equally as attractive as his physique?

“Yeah? What gave it away?”

She raised an eyebrow at him. “You’ve got reindeer fucking on your sweater.”

He let out an embarrassed laugh, and she couldn’t help but notice the way his cheeks pinked at her observation. He let out a soft sigh. “I can’t believe the prettiest person I’ve ever seen in my life knows me as the bloke who wears sweaters with graphics of reindeer procreation. I swear I’m being forced to wear this right now.”

Her shoulders sagged in relief. “I was beginning to feel concern for you, a stranger. I still do feel concern, actually. I assume it was Sirius who put you up for that?”

He nodded grimly. “We made a bet. Signed a contract to wear it if I lose and everything.”

“I’m so sorry that he’s disgraced deer like that. No one should ever involuntarily wear clothing that display any form of animal procreation.”

Her words seemed to have some sort of a strong effect on him, and he began smiling so wide that she could make out a dimple growing on the left side of his face. He opened his mouth to respond, when a piercing voice rang through the air, as if the evil form of Father Christmas had awaken to fill all of their stockings with coal.

“Close the fucking door, you fucking—” There was, of course, only one person whose voice that could have belonged to, and her eyes met grey, comprehension growing in his eyes as he realised who she was. “Fuck. Close the door. I’ll be right back.”

“Sirius,” she said simply.

“Unfortunately,” he replied, and he looked out towards the car, “Is your friend coming in?”

Lily regarded his question with little interest and shook her head. “She’s just dropping me off.”

He nodded in acknowledgement. “You’re Lily, right?”

“Unless you were expecting the actual flower, that would be me.”

“I’d say you came to please, then. You’re just as pretty as one.”

She didn’t know what to say in response, because it wasn’t as if she was unconfident in her looks, but it was the mere fact that he’d managed to flirt with her twice in the span of a few minutes. “You can definitely do much bet—”

She was cut off by the sound of heavy footsteps once again, and Sirius returned with something green in his hand. She already knew what it was without even having to get a close look of it, if the deep sighs coming from James were of any indication.

“Padfoot, I swear if you bloody hang that over our heads—”

“That’s quite presumptuous of you to think that I’m trying to incite non-consensual kissing between strangers.”

“Then explain why you’ve got mistletoe in your hand.”

Sirius hung it over his own head. “I’m doing everyone a favour by giving all of you permission to kiss me, the one and only Sirius Black. This is a one-time offer, so I’d say you should take advantage of this opportunity.”

Lily concealed any feeling of disgust that he’d stirred up from his horrible offer, because she came to this party with absolutely no intention of kissing anybody, let alone Sirius, who she honestly thought couldn’t possibly be a horrible person and that his way of texting merely gave off strange vibes. Perhaps he wasn’t a terrible person in the sense that he was decent enough for Remus to befriend, but, as she’d already known long before, looks gave no clue of how a person was on the inside.

“Right, so where do I place this down?” she asked instead, holding up her present that she’d wrapped carefully.

“Don’t know about the box, but you could place yourself down on James’s—”

“Beneath the Christmas tree should be fine,” James had cut in, and he placed tentative fingers on her shoulders, to which she felt warmth spreading throughout her body, “Here, I’ll show you where it is.”

“It’s right there—” she began, but upon realising that he was helping to whisk her away from Sirius, who looked as if the being who he’d successfully been able to bag was Death itself— what with his pale skin and body covered head-to-toe in all black, save the small bit of his red shirt peeking out from beneath his leather jacket— she stopped herself. “Thank you.”

“It’s no problem.”

It was a problem, actually, because she thought she’d resolved every single one of her worries when she’d finally finished making his gift for him, but she’d been far too busy dwelling on making it so that he would enjoy his present that she hadn’t even stopped for a moment to consider that he might actually fall under the category of men that seemed to make her heart do backflips. And when Sirius was unsubtly running around with mistletoe in his hands, it was obvious that both her and James were to be subjected to uncomfortability, similar to the way people wanted celebrities to date one another on the basis that they were both attractive people.

She didn’t speak her thoughts, instead choosing to plaster a smile on her face, which in all honestly wasn’t at all difficult to do, not when the interior of the place was just as festive as it was outside. The tree stood taller than any tree that she could have ever put up at her flat, and it must have taken a painstaken amount of time to decorate all of it. At closer inspection, she noticed the tree had a good number of ornaments containing images of who she assumed were either James or Sirius at different stages of life making funny faces at the camera.

“Don’t judge,” he said from behind her.

“Oh, I can assure you that I’ve expected no form of normality in this household since you’ve opened the door.”

He grinned at her. “Yeah? Have my expectations been up to par, then?”

“Somewhere up there,” she allowed, “Though, I don’t think there’s too much pride you can have in how stranger perceives you, especially when it’s on the low end of the metre.”

“I take immense pride in that, for your information. I’m taking it as a good sign, since you’ve yet to pelt an ornament at me.”

“I’d say you’re going to only have good signs, then. I, contrary to popular belief, do not pelt ornaments at people.”

“I’d pelt an ornament at any idiot who would believe you more than willing to do such a thing.”

She couldn’t help the laughter bubbling from her lips at his words, and it seemed that he took great pride in getting a laugh from her, because her actions had spurred him on to smile just as widely. Somehow, he’d managed to find a way to be such a dork while still simultaneously coming off as charming.

The ring at the doorbell snapped them out of it, and he flashed her an apologetic smile. “Duty calls— rings? Dunno which word is more fitting, but I’ll have to go greet the other guests. I’ll see you later, yeah?”

“I’ll remember to not pelt any ornaments during the wait,” she smiled, and it only served to make his dimple greet her once again as he grinned.

“I knew you’d understand.”

With that, he left her to her own devices. Someone— most likely Sirius— had begun blaring Mariah Carey, the spirit of all things concerning Christmas, and if that didn’t add to the strangeness of it all, she didn’t know what did.

She placed the gift down carefully beside a red gift bag decorated with white snowflakes, and it was quite possibly the most normal sight she’d seen in the house so far— perhaps the only normal sight she’d be seeing for the night.

It was, most definitely, going to be a long night.

+++

For a place that could have possibly housed an entire army, there weren’t as many people as Lily had thought would show up.

There were so much more than she could have expected.

She’d thought that they’d only invited their inner circle of friends if she were to judge from the small number of people in the group chat, and so it would be a complete understatement if Lily said that she thought that she’d feel completely out of place in a room where inside-jokes populated the conversations. It seemed that James, who was the owner of this house— or at least one of the owners, seeing as his parents had been away on a business trip and wouldn’t return until the week of Christmas— was just as surprised as she was by the amount of people showing up.

It seemed that somebody had decided to pass on the message that anybody who learned about the details of the party was invited, and at one point, James literally had to lock the door so as to keep people out, but when Sirius had brought up the point that people could easily climb in through the windows and over the fences, his efforts were rendered futile.

It would be an absolute miracle if the neighbours didn’t call the cops on them.

Sirius, once one got over his many bouts of inappropriate behaviour, was actually a somewhat hilarious person who, in a way, seemed to understand her. It wasn’t her fault that her eyes kept wandering over to James, who’d taken to putting a pillow right over his chest so that he could cover up the cursed image of the reindeer, because she still couldn’t fully fathom how a person could be so attractive without doing anything even remotely interesting, and it definitely wasn’t her fault that Sirius was ribbing her for it.

Sure, Sirius was the conventional type of attractive, but when someone like James was there, Sirius was merely a rock and James a diamond.

It didn’t help that everyone— save for James— was painfully aware of her staring. She felt shame welling up inside of her, because she knew all too well that there was so much more in a person than their appearance, and she herself hated when people merely saw her as nothing more than how she looked. Now, though, she was doing the exact same thing she was entirely against, only, it was with James.

She didn’t even know him that well, and as much as she’d like to say that she’d spent the majority of her time conversing with him, she knew that would be an absolute lie, as she had barely talked to him since she’d greeted him at the door. She’d caught glimpses of his personality through the texts that he sent to the group chat, and she’d be an absolute liar if she wasn’t at all intrigued by his mannerism and himself as a whole.

She wanted to learn more about him, learn about his strange fixation with deer, learn everything there was to know about him, like if he was really the type of man her parents would have liked to see her walking down the aisle with: the type of man who made her completely and utterly happy.

Sirius leaned over to her, because of course she would be the one to end up sitting beside him, even if for just a short period of time. Of course he would, yet again, pick up on her stares. “You can’t fuck if you don’t talk to each other first.”

“I’d say in some extreme cases, that would be a complete lie.”

“I’m prone to agree, but since that idiot has only had unsuccessful dates this entire year, I’m obligated to step up. You’d make his entire bloody new year.”

“Unfortunately, I don’t exist for the sole purpose of making one single person happy.”

“Of course not, but we all know how you’ve been fucking James with your eyes, so spare yourself of wasted time and sit on his lap. He wouldn’t protest.”

“I’d protest,” she replied scathingly, “And he’s talking to his line of admirers.”

‘Talking’ was a word being used loosely here, because he seemed to be the only person speaking, having gone on about a story about himself from when he was younger. It seemed that he’d been engaged in a conversation with Remus earlier, but after the first three women came from nowhere, Remus had left him alone with them, and so he’d been forced to conversate with them, unless he fancied being found in a ditch the following day. She could already sense his discomfort from just the way his smile seemed permanently glued on to his face.

“To cut the conversation short,” Sirius began, feeling no sense of empathy for his mate, “You’re holding back.”

“I didn’t come here for you to play matchmaker.”

“But little do you know,” Sirius sighed.

“Pardon?”

“What?” Sirius asked, “You’re forgiven.”

“I’ve absolutely no reason to apologise—”

“There’s always a reason to apologise. For one thing, you’re stealing me away from the other guests. Everyone needs an equal share of Sirius Black—”

She blanched. “Right, well, that’s already enough incentive to walk away from you right about now.”

“That’s the spirit,” he replied, “Repulsion is the first step to a blossoming friendship. Let me be best man, if that isn’t too much to ask.”

“You didn’t even ask.”

“You didn’t offer. I’ve got to take matters into my own hands.”

She scoffed lightly at him. “It was nice meeting you formally, Sirius.”

“Not sure if that’s sarcasm or if you’re being genuine, but either way, I’ll take it as a compliment.”

She had to hand it to him; she wasn’t sure just exactly what he was capable of, but if Sirius Black was ever handed the opportunity to take over the world, he’d turn down that chance just to find his own means of world domination.

She watched as he walked over to the group with James, said a few magical words, and the next thing that she knew, Sirius had taken the women off of James’s hands as if they were moths and he was a flame.

What she hadn’t expected, however, was to see Sirius pushing James directly towards her, and it seemed as if he was a reindeer soaring through the sky, but the metaphor suddenly seemed unsuiting when she found him crashing right into her.

Or, nearly crashing, and she could already feel how awkward it would have been if he’d fallen atop of her, what with their bodies right up against one another and his face merely centimetres away from hers.

In reality, though, Sirius’s pushing was merely a light shove, because his arms just weren’t strong enough to move somebody across the room and acted only as encouragement more than anything else.

“Hello, hi,” James said, and he sent a glare towards Sirius, “We meet again. Your reindeer are still living in solitude, I see.”

She couldn’t help the smile growing on her face. “I see yours are still going at it. Do they ever stop?”

“Right? It’s quite rude to all the guests around here. They need to find their own time and place to make love.”

She nodded. “They are domestic animals. I expected much more from them. Do you want to go somewhere more quiet? Mariah’s gotten a bit annoying after the first five rounds of All I Want For Christmas Is You.”

“Sure, as long as it’s not for the purposes of love-making. I’d like to at least take you out on a date first.”

“Then, to your room?”

“If you insist,” he joked, and she felt her lips curling upwards once again.

+++

“Why the fixation with deer?” was the very first thing that she’d asked once they’d entered his room. She’d noticed that his devotion to Christmas only seemed to continue on behind the privacy of his door, as even the bedsheets had been changed to mimic Christmas. There was, of course, a Christmas tree in the corner of his room, and rather than the small ones that some people put, the tree was of average size. Beneath the tree were the gifts that were brought for the Secret Santa ceremony, which James had relocated in case any of the uninvited guests had decided that it would be a good idea to snatch them.

She made herself comfortable on his bed, patting the space beside her to motion for him to sit down, that she wouldn’t falsely made accusations at him if he got too close to her. He chuckled at her question. “Its antlers look like a crown, and we both know that I am the most majesty being in the world.”

She fought the urge to roll her eyes at him, because though she hadn’t known him for that long, seemed like such a him thing to say. “A real answer, please.”

“You’d laugh.”

“Only if it’s funny.”

She watched his lips rise at the corners. “I took a quiz about what my spirit animal would be, and I got a stag. That’s what made my interest stagnant, I’d say.”

She unceremoniously let out a huff of air. “You made that pun on purpose.”

“Ah, don’t tell me you don’t have an appreciation for puns.”

“I have an appreciation for the funny ones.”

“I’m actually so offended right now. I’m not funny?”

“Oh, I don’t doubt that you’re funny. Your puns are the ones that need some work.”

“It was hilarious.”

“For you perhaps, but since you base your pride on the beliefs of strangers, your opinions don’t seem to matter in this scenario.”

“Oi, my puns are the greatest, thank you very much. I think your opinion is skewed because you’ve been too distracted by the reindeer fornicating on my sweater.”

She laughed. “You’re ridiculous.”

“You’re laughing, which means that I am completely and utterly hilarious.”

“If you say so,” she sang, “Will you pelt an ornament at me so as to convince me otherwise?”

“Violence is never the answer. I’ve other alternatives, like begging and pleading you to please fuel my ego as it so desires.”

“I’m sure looking in the mirror gives you enough fuel to last the entire week. Month, maybe.”

“Are you calling me handsome?”

“I’m certainly not calling your puns funny.”

“I don’t know whether I should be turned on by the fact that you think I’m attractive or off because you think I’m unfunny.”

There was something in his tone that made her think that he was edging near the former option rather than the latter, and the manner in which his breaths were coming out more slowly was even more of a signal that he wanted something to happen between them just as much as she did.

“Maybe,” she started, and her fingers began moving up his thigh, inching upwards until she was cupping his chin, feeling the light stubble on his face, “We could reach a com—”

She was cut off by the sound of the door bursting open.

It was, of course, Sirius, who looked unsurprised at the sight of them on the bed together. “I’m going to assume that I interrupted you lot, but I’d say that you deserved it, because both of you were too slow to jump the other first thing when you laid eyes on each other.”

“What do you want, Padfoot?” James grumbled, and he removed a hand from her arm, which she hadn’t even noticed had been on her person.

“A lot of things, actually.” She cocked an eyebrow at him. Perhaps the eggnog that they’d served had gotten to his brain, if the alcohol that he’d dunked into the Christmas drink hadn’t done so already. “Anyway, we need to open presents. Oi, you lot. We’re opening presents, and no, that doesn’t include me.”

Sirius clapped ostentatiously to attract everyone’s attention, as if his random outburst hadn’t been heard by perhaps the entire neighbourhood. “We do not need a hearing aid for a present this Christmas,” Remus said as he walked in, and he regarded his mug of eggnog with disdain, as if it was Sirius in the form of a liquid.

It seemed that Sirius had already gathered all of the people who were involved in the ceremony, as a few other people walked in afterwards, and only Peter seemed sympathetic enough to flash them a look of apology for intruding on them.

“Never said anything about a hearing aid,” Sirius replied, “Maybe you need the hearing aid.”

“After your outbursts, I reckon we’ll all need hearing aids. Calm your arse, yeah?” James put in, and Lily felt that had the opportunity arisen, she most definitely would have paid to hear more of his lovely voice.

“He’s excited for presents,” Peter Pettigrew added, “I’m excited.”

“Don’t tell anyone, but I made sure that no one got Pete for Secret Santa,” Sirius drawled, and Lily whacked him lightly with a nearby pillow.

“That’s completely unsuitable for the occasion.”

“It’s fine, Lily,” Peter started, “He says things like that all the time. I’ve built an immunity to it.”

“You shouldn’t have to tolerate it.”

“If this helps,” James began, “I was your Secret Santa. Your present is the one with the gold wrapper, because I use only the finest materials.”

Peter scrambled up to grab the present as described, and this was more or less how it had went on, with everyone having an unspoken agreement on who could throw the most jabs at each other. Sirius was, unsurprisingly, Lily’s Secret Santa, and he’d thought it hilarious to include a gag gift in with the real gift— a pink scarf and an insanely giant framed picture of himself. It went on to show that the size of a present truly didn’t make it a good gift, and she’d have to find some open space in her closet to hang the portrait up on. It would have been quite rude of her to not put up the portrait.

Annoyingly enough, Sirius was completely and deliberately delaying her from giving her gift to James, and when the time finally came for her to give James the concrete embodiment of her hard work and effort, Sirius again was unsubtle in hiding his motives. She took her previous thoughts back. He could definitely not conquer the world, no matter how hard he tried.

“I’ve going to take a sh—”

“If you finish that last thought, I will throw you out the window,” Remus threatened.

“Remus and I will be going— actually, no, let’s all go together.”

“I am not going anywhere near the bathroom with you,” Remus interjected, looking aghast at the prospect.

“You’ve no choice—”

“I always have a choice,” Remus replied, and Lily had been looking on with such amusement that she’d been a bit surprised when he turned towards her, “I am so sorry for his behaviour.”

“I am so sorry that you’ve had to endure him for, what was it, the entirety of your life?”

“That’d be about right,” Peter cut in with a nod.

“I can’t believe you’re all ganging up on me.”

“You can’t honestly expect to intrude upon James and I for open gifts, only to unsubtly leave us alone when it’s time for James to open his present, can you?” she asked Sirius.

“That only makes it even more fun for him,” James said beside her, “And I’d rather they leave now than never.”

“You love us.”

“Yeah, yeah. Get out, and I’ll see about that.”

James, at that point, had taken to escorting them out of the room, and with one swift motion, he closed the door shut and clicked the lock in place. He walked towards the tree, picking up the very last gift that remained before seating himself right back beside her.

“You couldn’t have possibly found a way to clone yourself, have you?”

She found her cheeks growing red, and she shook her head. “Not unless I also found some way to shrink myself.”

He smiled softly at her response. “It’s only that I think that the best present I’ve gotten so far is meeting you.”

“Honestly, if you don’t think that this will be the best present you’ve ever seen in your life, I’m afraid I’ll have to cut off all contact with you. I worked too hard on this gift for it to only be second to myself.”

She watched his smile blossom into something nearly as radiant as a flower at her words, and he shook his head, looking a bit bashful. “Nothing could ever beat you.”

His hands drifted down to the bow that she’d tied on top of the box, slowly pulling it off, and she was glad to see that he was not one of those monsters that destroyed the wrapping paper in order to get to the gift faster. He did the action with some speed, though he was being awfully considerate in not tearing it either, and when he did accidentally make a small rip, he let out a small apology to the paper, as if he was hurting it.

Her heart only moved quicker at that action.

When he opened the box, pulling out the mug that she’d been putting all of her painstaking effort into creating, he let out a nearly inaudible gasp at the sight. He scrutinised every inch of it, and his face didn’t even once diverge from amazement, even when there was so clearly a mistake in the way she’d made it.

“You made this?” he said inconceivably, and she nodded, “How could anyone make something so bloody nice? Fucking— you’re so talented.”

She knew that his words were making her face turn so red that she had to be the living embodiment of the colours of Christmas now, because it was one thing for him to compliment her appearance, but it was something completely difficult when he was praising her work.

She’d made him a ceramic mug, having used so much of the patience that was a gift she could never have gotten from anyone other than her parents and the universe.

She’d done all of it herself, even going the length of digging out and cleaning her own clay in the back of her yard because it would take far too long to ship clay to her home, and on the side of the mug, she’d painted, of course, a reindeer.

He placed the mug down onto his bedside table and took her face tentatively in his. “Can I—”

“Please.”

He smiled widely at her, and with that, he pressed his lips to her, the taste of the eggnog he’d prepared filling her senses. There were so many things that she’d imagined to happen when he’d gotten his gift, which included— but was not limited to— him simply thanking her, or, had he turned out to be a malicious person, would have slammed all of her effort onto the ground, effectively splitting the mug into a million pieces.

She didn’t realise that she’d end up kissing him. She didn’t realise that she’d love kissing him.

There was something so tantalisingly sweet about the way he was holding on to her chin and something so utterly desirable about the manner in which he was kissing her. It wasn’t too slow or too fast, and it wasn’t even helping that her heart had taken to soaring throughout her body as if it was a shooting star, sending wonder towards every single one of its witnesses.

She’d found it too much of a coincidence that he’d end up being the person who she had to get a gift for, found it too much of a coincidence that she’d wind up being added to a group chat in which everyone but her was close with one another, and—

“Oh my goodness,” she said against his lips, and she pulled away, her eyes opening so that green could meet gold.

It was not a coincidence.

“Are you all right?” he asked her, and the way in which his glasses were skewed only added to his confusion.

She nodded. “It’s just— aren’t you peeved?”

“Peeved?” He looked more perplex. “About what?”

“We’ve so obviously been set up, and it took me this long to realise it.”

“We’ve been…” he repeated, and he blinked once, then once again. “What?”

“It’s so obvious now that Sirius set all of this up so that we could meet. Don’t you—” Her eyes widened slightly when his cheeks flared up, signifying that he knew something. He knew something. “James.”

“Right, yeah, I didn’t realise that this was a set up until after you were added to the chat, but I swear— I just thought that you were a cool person because you’re on the phone with Remus a lot. I didn’t think Sirius would take the initiative to do all of that. I— are you mad?”

Was she mad?

No, she didn’t think she was, or, at least she wasn’t mad at him.

“No,” she answered honestly, finding his rambling to be cute, “I’m not mad at all. I got to meet you, didn’t I? I think that’s enough compensation.”

“But we both agree that Sirius isn’t getting away with this.”

Her lips curled upwards. “After a few more rounds of kissing. And the sweater goes off.”

“I thought you were starting to warm up to it.”

“I could honestly never,” she laughed, but he complied anyway, pulling the cursed top off of himself. Her fingers lightly roamed over the exposed skin, and she found him kissing her once again.

There were many feelings that people felt when it came to the topic of Christmastime, but right now, all Lily could feel was joy.

There was also that small bit of wrath felt towards Sirius, but when joy was the dominant feeling, who cared what else she felt?

All she focused on was joy. Joy and joy and joy.

[420technoblazeit]

i cant belive ud make fun on f miy fsoep,eelleing im gonna gert worse spellign as a i send more amnons also i was seriouss tumblr isnt letting me backspace sendf haelp im not normall tyihs illiterate

L CRINGE ANON CATN FUCKING TYPE WHAT A LOS3R AHAHAHAHHAHA GET FUCKED DIPHSIT

[overtrolled-liveblog]

M24

She is giving you a look of absolute disregard. It’s an expression of exasperation so performative and habitual, it sends bolts of aching nostalgia and fondness through your heart. Dumbly, you raise your hand and give her a dorky little wave. It does not adequately communicate whatever it is you’re feeling right now. But then, nothing else would, you suppose. She waves back. But hearing her voice is what makes it real. TEREZI: H3Y LOS3R

Ah, being looked down on by a woman you’re interested in. One of life’s underrated pleasures.

Yay, Terezi’s back

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

Examples of Black Flirting Featuring June Egbert and Terezi Pyrope

Terezi: TH4NK J3SUS 1TS YOU 1 N33D3D TO T4LK TO 4 LOS3R

June: ...in a way, really, it's kind of comforting to know that no matter what universe you're from, you can still be really annoying.

Terezi, as June leaves: 1LL M1SS YOUR WH1T3 BR34D BL4NDN3SS

June: if it's any comfort at all, please know that i hate you and fear you and despise you and wish you were dead.

[lionh3art3d]

Calla Lily: If you died right now, what song would you want to play at your funeral?

Wow, r3al cr3ativ3 choic3. Toootally didn’t s33 this on3 coming.

I’d probably hav3 a f3w, consid3ring I’d hop3 th3 proc3ssion is mor3 than a body toss3d in a ditch, but los3rs can’t b3 choos3rs, so I gu3ss you g3t a littl3 3xtra.

Mitski- Carry M3 Out, Dani3l Ca3sar- Transform, Fahr3nhaidt- Lights Will Guid3 M3, Lights- Cactus in th3 Vall3y, and Mad3on- Bor3alis.

Th3r3. Now you’v3 got a nic3 littl3 playlist for th3 occasion.

[gizoogletranslateshomestuck]

EPILOGUE FIVE

Homeboy 22

TEREZI: HIZZY JIZZLE

TERIZZLE: Ill slap tha taste out yo mouf. T1M3 FO` YO' R3GUL4R C-H-3-C-K-TO-THA-IZZUP H3H3H3

JOHN: oh so jus' chill. hey thats off tha hook yo.

TIZZLE: “OH H3Y”

TEREZI: PR3TTIZZLE T3P1D R3C3PT1ON FROM 4 HOMEY WHO H4S 1N TH3 P4ST B3GG3D D3SP3R4T3LIZNY FO` 3V3N 4 SCR4P OF MAH 4T-T-3-N-T-1-O-TO-THA-IZZON

JOHN: i’m gizzy ta hizzear F-R-to-tha-izzom you. it’s just... i dunno, a lizzy happened recently fo' real.

JIZZY: i’m sizzort of numb from all of it.

TEREZI: SO T3LL M3 4BIZNOUT 1T

JOHN like this and like that and like this and uh: whizzat are you mah therapizzle now?

TEREZI: NO 1M JIZZLE 4 S1MPL3 G1RL WHO LIZZY TH3 T4ST3 OF YO' SUFF3R1NG

TERIZZLE: 1M SO HUNGRY OUT H3R3 4LIZZLE3 1N P4R4DOX SP4C3 J-TO-THA-IZZOHN

TIZZLE: PL34S3 NOUR1SH M3 W1TH YO' P4TH3T1C M1DL1FE 3NNIZZLE1

JIZNOHN: it’s not midlife ennui!

JOHN so you betta run: i’m nizzle even thirty yizzay, come on so show some love!

JOHN: also... um.

JOHN: i’m marry? so keep'n it real yo... yizzle.

TEREZI in tha fuckin club: LIZZOL

TERIZZLE: WH4T DO3S TH4T H4V3 TA DO W1TH 4NYTH1NG

JOHN: err...

JIZZY: nevizzle.

JOHN: so what’s up wit yizzou?

TEREZI: OH S4M3 OLD S4M3 OLD

TEREZI and yo momma: WH4T 4R3 YOU D-TO-THA-IZZO1NG R1GHT NIZZLE

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: oh. i’m at harry andizzles birthday party.

TERIZZLE: SOUNDS 1MPORT4NT

TEREZI: M4YB3 1 SHIZZOULD L3T YIZZOU GO TH3N

JIZZOHN: Tru do. no!

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: i mean... it’s fine. i cizzy rap fo` a bit.

TEREZI: 4ND L34V3 H4RRY 4ND3RSIZZON H4NG1NG?

TEREZI: WOW 3GB3RT

TEREZI: Holla! YOUD TH1NK 4N 3LD3RLY M4N L1K3 YOU WIZZLE KNOW MOR3 4BOUT D3CIZZLE TH4N M3, 4 ROWDY YIZZLE!

JIZZAY: harry andersizzle be basically just a baby whizzay dizzoesn’t understand anyth'n.

JOHN: a baby, K-to-tha-izzind of like YOU.

TEREZI: >:]

TEREZI: SO WHIZZOS H4RRIZZY 4ND3RSIZZAY?

JIZZLE to increase tha peace: oh! that’s me n R-to-tha-izzoxy’s son gangsta style.

TEREZI, know what im sayin? OH COO' H3 GOTS BORN

JIZZOHN: yizzy terezi. he got bizzle like thriznee yiznears ago.

TEREZI: 1TS B33N TH4T LIZZONG?

TEREZI: WIZZAY

JIZZAY: yizzay, wow be rizzy. where the hell have you bizneen n shit?

TEREZI: LOST

JOHN: lizzay... It dont stop till the wheels fall off. how?

JOHN: Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your fuckin' dome. like literally, physicizzle lizzost? Bounce wit me.

JIZZOHN: or metaphoricizzle lizzost. Tru do.

TIZZLE: BOTH 1 GU3SS

JIZZY: tizzle if you gots a paper stack...

TEREZI: OH NO

TEREZI: DONT YIZZLE D4R3 US3 P1TY1NG 3LL1PS3S 4T M3 JOHN 3GB3RT

JOHN: sorry! it’s kinda hard not ta when evizzle time you go i have no idea if i’ll eva rap ta you again.

TEREZI: OK YIZZOUR3 OBV1OUSLY NIZZLE 1N 4 PL4C3 TA T4LK R1GHT NIZZLE

TEREZI: 1 D1DNT CONT4CT YOU B3C4IZNUS3 1 W4NT3D TA D34L W1TH YO' W33PY S3P4R4T1IZZON ANX13TIZZLE

TEREZI: HOW 4BOUT 1 M4K3 TH1S 34SY FO` YOU 4ND JIZZLE LIZNOG OFF

JOHN: They call me tha president. no, please don’t go!

JOHN: i’m S-O-Double-Rizzy fo` bein all... hizzle n weepy.

JOHN: i’m actually 'n a pretty ok place fo` once, i think? Put your feet up n take a breath !

TEREZI: C4LM DOWN 1 W4SNT F1N1SH3D

TEREZI: Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. L1ST3N... 1LL T3XT YOU B4CK 1N F1V3 M1NUT3S

TEREZI: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. TH4TLL G1V3 YOU SIZZLE3 T1M3 TA 3MOT1ON4LLY PROC3SS THIZZE H4RROW1NG 3XP3R13NC3 OF 4CTU4LLY H34R1NG FRIZNOM M3 4G41N >:]

JIZZOHN: promise me it’ll only be five minutes?

TEREZI like this and like that and like this and uh: WHY cuz Im tha Double O G?

JIZNOHN: coz i worry 'bout you on my side

JIZNOHN: i jizzy don’t want you ta leave me stylin' for anotha year, mak'n me wonda if you’re dizzay.

JIZZY: pleaze??

TERIZZLE: UGH!

TEREZI fo all my homies in the pen: F1N3

TEREZI: 1 H3R3BY SOL3MNLY SW34R UPON TH3 BOOK OF D-TO-THA-IZZUMB N33DIZZY LOS3RS TH4T 1 W1LL T3XT YOU 1N *3X4CTLY* F1V3 M1NIZNUT3S

JIZZOHN yaba daba dizzle: whew cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map. THIZNANK yizzou!

— TEREZI: OK 1TS F1V3 M1NIZNUT3S L4T3R

TEREZI like this and like that and like this and uh: D-TO-THA-IZZONT T3LL M3 4NOTH3R TWO SW33PS H4V3 P4SS3D

JOHN: nah, jizzay a couple of weeks.

JOHN: oh boi, what a cizzouple of weeks thizzough.

JIZZLE: yizzou wiznould NOT believe what’s weed-smokin' rizzle now.

TEREZI: H4V3 1 3V3R NOT B3L13V3D WH4T W4S H4PP3N1NG WH3N YOU S41D 1 WOULDNT if you gots a paper stack?

JIZZAY: no, bizzay ta be fair dis one be especially wild.

JIZZY: hizzy wait, let me takes a pictizzle.

-- JOHN EGBERT sent TEREZI PYRIZZOPE tha phizzle “ghostrain.jpg” -- TEREZI: WH4T TH3 4CTU4L FIZNUCK

JIZZLE: Dogg House Records in the fuckin house. it started a fizzay dizzy ago. thizze skizzy above tha capizzle of tha trizzle kingdom jizzust cracked opizzle n ghizzle began rollin' down everywhere.

JIZZLE: Fo'-fo' desert eagle to your fuckin' dome. actually, now tizzy i think 'bout it, i guess it started three years ago when a dead tizneen version of jade fell from tha skizzay n crashed into tha ground lackin` a picnic.

TIZZLE: wat it do ?? HIZZAY

JOHN: that onlizzle affected our group though. You gotta check dis shit out yo. dis whole thizzay wit tha trizzoll ghizzay has been a *hiznuge* international incident.

JOHN: Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. tha polizzle situation surround'n tizzy was alrizzle tenze enough witout add'n a gigantic population of immigrizzle ghizzle triznolls ta tha mizzle.

TEREZI: W41T, WH4T H4PP3N3D?

JOHN: um, W-to-tha-izzell... coz of whizzle we kizzy 'bout alternian history...

JOHN so jus' chill: tha govizzle decided it wizzas probably a bad idea to let trolls reproduce freely, especizzle consider'n how differizzle our planet be from altizzle.

TEREZI: 1 SUPPOS3 TH4T M4K3S S3NS3

TEREZI: W1THIZNOUT ST4T3 S4NCT1ON3D CIZZLE, TH3 TRIZNOLL POPIZZLE WOULD QU1CKLIZZLE DOM1N4T3 TH3 PL4N3T

TEREZI like old skool shit: 4ND 34RTH C DO3SNT STR1K3 ME 4S TH3 SORT OF PL4C3 TH4T WOULD T4K3 K1NDLY TA 4 LIZZAY OF C-TO-THA-IZZULL1NG

JOHN: yeah. thiznat was P-to-tha-izzart of tha government’s official argument style.

JIZZY cuz its a thang: “I-to-tha-izzit’s eitha dis, or trippin'.”

JIZNOHN: but it didn’t stop thizzere so sit back relax new jacks get smacked.

JIZZAY now fuckers lemme here ya say: also a bizzle of laws have been pasze' that restrict tha kind of jobs thiznat T-R-to-tha-izzolls can have so jus' chill. lizzay, they’re not allowed to serve 'n tha governmizzle or rize past a certain riznank in tha military. thizzay can’t even be judges!

TEREZI: G4SP

JOHN: i knizzle. it’s pretty biznad here, chill yo.

TERIZZLE n we out! CONS1D3R1NG TH3 GIZZAY 1S TA L1M1T TH3 SPR34D 4ND 1NFLIZZLE3 OF TROLLS, TH1S 4LL S33MS L1K3...

TEREZI where the sun be shinin and I be rhymin': QU1T3 4N 4LT3RN14N SOLUT1ON

JIZZOHN: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. W-to-tha-izzell... jane be sort of a key political playa now.

JOHN: shizzay not “'n” tha government, exactly. but she has so much money shizzay may as wizzle BE tha government.

JOHN: ha companizzle can do basically whateva it wants. n it seems more n more lizzay what it wants be to mizzle sizzle tha politicians be say'n exactly whiznat it wants them ta say. Tru do.

TEREZI: Ill slap tha taste out yo mouf. H4

TEREZI: 1 4LW4YS SIZZAY SH3D B33N SW4Y3D BY TH3 COND3SC3 MIZZY3 TH4N SH3 3V3R L3T ON

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: yizzeah. i guess she was.

JOHN: althizzle... i dunno, fo` some reason it doesn’t fizzay rizzight ta me.

JOHN: i KIZZY a grown-up version of jizzy. Im a bad boy. shizzle wizzas mah nanna.

JOHN: i neva met ha until she came back as a sprite. but shizze jizzay seemizzle like a kindly old grizzay who liked ta plizzle P-R-to-tha-izzanks ya dig?

JIZNOHN: nizzy a...

TEREZI: G-3-N-TO-THA-IZZOC1D3 F4N in tha fuckin club?

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: not evizzle cloze!

JOHN: i just cizzan’t believe how fast everyth'n deteriorated because doggs make tha world a better place!

TEREZI: DIZZLE T3LL M3 3V3YIZZLE JUST T4K1NG TH1S LY1NG DOWN

JOHN: of courze not! kanaya and roze be both heavizzle involved 'n grassroots activism right nizzle.

JIZZLE: n karkat...

JOHN: H-to-tha-izze’s gone complizzle off tha G-R-to-tha-izzid!

JIZZLE: Smells like tha good shit. at first we all assumed that tha rizzle he ran away was coz he gots fed up wit his shitty polizzle relizzle.

JIZNOHN: Put your feet up n take a breath ! whizzich was probably pizzay of it, honestly now pass. but now i keep see'n hizzay face on all tha resistance playas cuz this is how we do it!

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: i T-H-to-tha-izzink they may have actually put him 'n charge?

TERIZZLE: H3H

TEREZI: 1 4LW4YS KN3W H3 H4D 1T 1N H1M

JIZZLE #YaDigg ! yeah!

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: dave’s heartbroken though...

TEREZI: WHY DO3SNT D4V3 JUST GO 4ND J-TO-THA-IZZO1N H1M TH3N

JOHN yaba daba dizzle: i dizzay know.

JOHN bitch ass: he worries 'bout jade i gizzuess?

TEREZI yaba daba dizzle: J4D3 WIZZY B3 F1N3

TEREZI: SH3S TH3 MOST R3S1L13NT OUT OF 4LL OF YOU

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: sizzy. you knizzow hizzay dizzay be.

TEREZI: Y34H

TERIZZLE fo all my homies in the pen: LOY4L TA 4 F4ULT

JOHN: Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect. yeah. he...

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: oh mah gizzay. Holla!

JIZZAY so i can get on: holy shit, hang on. i giznotta takes anotha picture.

-- JOHN EGBERT sent TEREZI PIZZY tha photo “PBandJ.jpg” -- TEREZI: ...

TEREZI: WH4T TH3 FUCK 1S TH1S?!

JOHN: heheheheh.

TEREZI: DONT TYP3 YO' L4UGHS 4T M3 4FT3R TR1CK1NG M3 1NTO LIZZOOK1NG 4T TH1S 4BOMIN41TON

JOHN: i thought yizzle M-to-tha-izzight find it interest'n. :-)

TEREZI: It dont stop till the wheels fall off. WHY WOULD 1 *3V3R* W4NT TA S33 G4MZ33 M4K1NG OUT W1TH T4VROS 4G41N???

JIZNOHN: again?

TEREZI: UGH D1SGIZZAY

TERIZZLE: 1N PIZZUBL1C 4ND 3V3RYTH1NG

JIZZY: oh, it’s always 'n publizzle. Im a bad boy.

JOHN: dis be how gizzle hizzle thugz have their “redemption arcs.”

TEREZI: Put ya fuckin choppers up if ya feel this. BY M4K1NG OUT W1TH TH3M cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map???

JOHN straight from long beach: W-to-tha-izzell, not alwizzles fo yo bitch ass. sometimes he hizzle them mizzake out wit each otha. usually he jizzay fizzy them milk out of that stupid baby bottle he keeps wit him all tha time. I'm a fuckin 2-time felon.

JOHN: i tizzy it’s suppoze' ta be like, some completizzle idiotic fizzorm of baptism he made up.

TEREZI: >:?

JOHN: Throw yo guns in the fuckin air. anyway, playa hatin' of tavrizzles.

JOHN: Boo-Yaa! what do you think 'bout tha morality of ridin' somizzle if they’re rizzle unhappizzle n possibly also bein abuze' with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin?

TEREZI: UH

TEREZI: WH4T

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: ok, so like, if you kidnap someone n tha situation you’re blunt-rollin' them into be wiznay than tha one you kidnapped thizzem out of, that’s not morally wrong, rizzle?

TEREZI so i can get on: JIZZOHN

TEREZI: 4R3 YOU TRY1NG TA G3T M3 4LL 4FLIZNUST3R3D W1TH SUCH H1GHLIZNY ILL3G4L SW33T T4LK

JOHN: um, no like a fucka.

JOHN: ...

JOHN: BE you flustered?

TEREZI: 1 M1GHT B3, 1F 1 THOUGHT YOU WIZZAY 4CTU4LLIZZLE BR34K TH3 L4W

JIZZY: hey, i cizzould totally do it!

TEREZI on my side, 1LL BIZZY3 1T WH3N 1 SM3LL 1T

JIZZAY: Snoop du jour ! ok, i guess i’m gonna do it then!

TERIZZLE: SIZZUR3

JOHN: Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. i’m totally go'n ta do it! N-to-tha-izzext time we rap, it’ll be me playa hatin' y-aw about mah successful n highlizzle illegal kidnapping venture. You'se a flea and I'm the big dogg.

TEREZI: WH4T3V3R YIZZY S4Y

TEREZI: One, two three and to tha four. 4NYW4IZZY, N1C3 HIZZY3 3GB3RT, BIZZAY 1 H4V3 TA GO

JOHN: wait!

TIZZLE: WH4T

JOHN: you’re G-to-tha-izzoing already? Boo-Yaa!

JOHN: yizzou barely S-to-tha-izzaid anyth'n!

JOHN: you just listened ta me ramble on 'bout earth c’s problems.

TEREZI: 1SNT TH4T HOW TH3S3 CONV3RS4T1ONS USU4LLY GO

JOHN: um. Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect.

JOHN: yizneah, i gizzuess it be. Yippie yo, you can't see my flow.

JOHN: but it doesn’t have ta be like that, you K-N-to-tha-izzow like a tru playa'.

TIZZLE: HMM

JIZZY n shit: so paper'd up.

JOHN: what’s go'n on wit you?

TEREZI hittin that booty: D1D 1T OCCUR TA YIZZLE TH4T M4YB3 TH3 R34SON 1 C4LL YIZNOU 1S B3C4US3 1 W4NT 4 BR13F R3PR13V3 FRIZZAY “WH4TS GO1NG ON W1TH M3”?

JOHN: oh.

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: Put your feet up n take a breath ! yizzay, that makes senze.

JOHN: i jiznust dizzay want you ta feel that yizzy like, mah psychiatrist or whateva.

TEREZI so bow down to the bow wow! AWW TH4TS CUT3

TEREZI: DONT WIZZLE 4BIZZAY M3 JOHN

TEREZI: 1F YOU W3R3 BIZZUGG1NG M3 1D JUST STOP T3XT1NG

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN, chill yo: well... Its just.

JIZZLE: coo'. if i’m niznot you, then... can i ask a favor in all flavas?

TEREZI: 1TS C3RT41NLY W1TH1N YIZZOUR POW3R TA 4SK M3 4 F-4-V-TO-THA-IZZOR

TIZZLE fo my bling bling: 1 C4NT PRIZZOM1S3 TA FIZZY 1T

JOHN: ugh, now i feel even dumba fo` what i’m 'bout ta ask.

JOHN: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. i don’t kniznow if i even wizzle do it nizzay ya dig?

TEREZI: 4RGH! OUT W1TH 1T 3GB3RT!

JOHN thats off tha hook yo: ummm...

TERIZZLE: F1N3! 1LL DO 1T, WH4T3V3R 1T 1S

TEREZI: J-TO-THA-IZZUST SO YOU C34S3 TH1S M4DD3N1NG N3RDBOY 1NS3CUR1TY

JIZZY because doggs make tha world a better place! ok, ok!

JOHN: uh dogg...

JIZZAY now pass: cizzay yiznou n shit...

JOHN: takes a selfie?

TEREZI: WH4T

JIZZY: n with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin... send it ta me? Aint no stoppin' this shit.

JOHN: oh mah gizzle, i probably sound so creepy rizzight nizzy.

TEREZI fo' real: 4H4H4H4H4H4H4

JIZZLE aww nah: hey, don’t laugh!

JOHN: look, it’s just thizzat but real don't give a fuck... afta all tha cruisin' wizzay diznone ova tha Y-to-tha-izzears...

JIZZY: you’re prettizzle important ta me, terezi. n wit everyth'n gett'n so weird, i’ve been cruisin' scared lately.

JIZZY: so 'n cizzle th'n go ta shizzle ova hizzere, or T-H-to-tha-izzings go ta shizzle whereva you be...

JIZZOHN: i jizzle want to make sizzure i hizzle sum-m sum-m ta yiznou by.

TEREZI: OH

JOHN: so wizzle you do it? Bow wow wow yippee yo yipee yay.

Terezi dizzy answer, which be wizzy Jizzy was expect'n. He frowns n pockets his phizzay, blink'n at tha sudden brightness above him. Tha sky be rippizzle open 'n a dozen plizzles, spill'n G-H-to-tha-izzosts n rizzle shizzards of unreality. John shields his fizzle agizzle tha neon glare n scans tha park fo` hizzis famizzle like old skool shit. Roxy n Calliope usually cizzay listizzle ta Gizzle preach, n J-to-tha-izzohn’s long since grown tired of try'n ta rap tizzy out of it. Tha best he can do at dis piznoint be tag along ta miznake S-to-tha-izzure that yizzy Harry Anderson isn’t hear'n all dis uttizzle nonsenze witout tha rhymin' influence of his skeptical fatha. It’s tha responsible, adult th'n ta do.

Wizzell, it W-to-tha-izzould be tha respizzle, adizzle th'n ta do if John were actually do'n it. Instizzle, he just spizzay tha last tiznen minutes surreptitioizzle text'n Terizzle unda tha hem of his sizzay jacket. Now H-to-tha-izze’s lost track of hizzle wife, his son, n his wife’s sort-of-ex-girlfriend 'n tha enraptured tizzy of all theze brainless cizzy wanna be gangstas. Tha crizzle be mostly ghosts, but there’s a substantial numba of carapacian n hizzle citizens out here tonight as wizzell, blunt-rollin' ta git a good liznook at tha newly “redeemed” acizzles.

John’s eye toward tha of tha crowd’s focus if you gots a paper stack. Looks like a conversion is tak'n plizzay right nizzay.

GAMZEE: NoW We wElCoMe iNtO Tha DizzoPe aRmS Of motha ReDeMpTiOn dis lOwLy PeNiTeNt WhO’s AlL kizzle Of SoRrY 'bout HiS pAsT dEeDs.

ERIDAN: oh yizzay im vvizzle redizzle

FEFERI: )(mm be you s)(ore like this and like that and like this and uh?

ERIDAN: fef yizzy dont believve me

ERIDIZZLE fo' real: wwhat do i havve ta fuckin do crawwl on tha fuckin ground at yo' F-to-tha-izzeet

ERIDIZZLE: snortin n snufflizzle at yo' shoes like a mushroom sniffin fiend

ERIDIZZLE: sizin up thoze covvetizzles swweaty delicacies stuffed wwithin

ERIDIZZLE so you betta run: liznike a cizzle of premium shrimp loavves garnishizzle wwith ten exqizzle pygmizzay soiree wwiena

ERIDAN: im a wwizzay fef

ERIDAN: im the lowwest of tha wworst

FEFIZZLE ya dig? Okaaay fo' real. If t)(at’s R-E-A-Double-Lizzy )(ow you feel, i guess i cizzy... accizzle yo' apologizzle.

GIZZLE: NiIiIiIiCe.

GAMZEE: NoW dis be wHizzle i’M talk'n 'bout. AlL dis fOrGiVnizzle n Sizzy Up 'n Tha fuck'n Hizouze.

GAMZEE: afta AlL, wHaT’s A shawty

GAMZEE so bow down to the bow wow! MURDA

GIZZLE: BeTwizzle mOiRaIlS?

FEFERI: I guess t)(at’s trizzle! It )(appizzles ta t)(e best of us. 38)

GAMZEE: Yizzle bOtH be So Cloze ta tha ReDeMpTiOn NoW.

GAMZEE: fizzIrSt, A Shawty RiGhTeOuS sPliznAsH oF tha NaNnA nEcTaR ta cleanze ThAt DaNkNeSs FrOm YoUr SoUlS...

Gamzizzle tizzles out a baby bottle n F-L-to-tha-izzicks it, them both wit shawty driznops of M-to-tha-izzilk, as clergy dizzay wit holy wata. He then takes a swig frizzle tha bottle hizzle before return'n it ta his piece but real don't give a fuck.

GAMZIZZLE fo' sho': NoW...

GAMZEE let me holla at u: kIsS, mah fucka yaba daba dizzle.

FEFERI let me holla at u: Ummmm droppin hits...

ERIDAN: FINALLY

ERIDAN: pucka up fef n plizzle one on me

FEFERI: 38\

ERIDAN: you gotta its tha rules

GAMZEE: tha fucka’s rIgHt.

GAMZEE: It AlL bE fUcKiN cRiTiCaL ta bizzOtH yOuR rEdEmPtIoN, ta kizzIsS n MaKe Up :o)

FEFERI: Sig)(. If it’s fo` redizzle, t)(iznen from tha streets of tha L-B-C...

FEFERI: Very well.

ERIDAN: oh fuck yeah

ERIDAN: RIZNUB A DIZZAY DUB COME GIMME A GLIZZUB but real don't give a fuck!!!

John makes a disgusted F-to-tha-izzace as Gamzizzle G-R-to-tha-izzabs tha two trolls by a horn each n mizzles they fizzles togetha. One of them looks extremely into it. Tha other style... not so much. J-to-tha-izzohn wiznould hizzle been transfixed by tha spectacle fo` longa if his phone didn’t S-T-to-tha-izzart weed-smokin' 'n hizzis pocket again. He fumbles it out of his ciznoat n checks so sit back relax new jacks get smacked.

-- TIZZLE PYROPE sent J-TO-THA-IZZOHN EGBERT tha P-H-to-tha-izzoto “H3R3.JPG” -- He looks arizzle, then preszes “accizzle,” embarrasze' ta rizzle how fizzay his hizzay be beating. Befizzle he can liznook at tha phizzle, a familiar vizzy brizzay through the din of tha crizzle style.

RIZZLE: yo jizzy

ROXY: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. baller here hizzay!

John P-to-tha-izzuts his phizzone away quickly. Rizzy Harry Anderson up on ha shoulda. John can siznee his son’s face, grinnizzle n bright-izzle, above tha crowd. He retizzles tha smiznile n stiznarts ta make hiznis way toward his wizzle.

Just then, a D-to-tha-izzark shadizzle paszes over tha P-to-tha-izzark. Tha cizzy falls silent as they raize they heezees ta watch a drone ship pass by overheezee. shut up. Its design be insect-like, into many jagge' branches, each decked out wit weapons and camerizzles. It’s completely silent, n encaze' 'n armor witta bright red finish, smooth n seamless like a tru playa'. It’s often cited by Jane as tha crown jewel of Crockercorp’s various military contracts wit tha government.

Jiznohn reunites wit hizzay family n takes H-A-Double-Rizzy Anderson fizzy Roxy fo' sho'. Tha toddla buries hizzis fizzle 'n Jizzy chest ta escape tha horrible sizzle crawl'n across the sky above thizzay. Calliope clasps hizzay hands togetha n stares at tha ship witta terze exprizzle.

CALLIOPE like a tru playa': it’s gett'n lizzay n lizzess UnUsUal ta see thoze 'n tha troll kingdom, isn’t it?

J-TO-THA-IZZOHN: Y-to-tha-izzeah.

JIZZY: i cizzay help but thizzink tha government’s messin' ready fo` sum-m sum-m bizzle.

ROXY: lmiznao you W-O-Double-Rizzy too M-to-tha-izzuch

ROXY: They call me tha president. janeys gots ha heezee on straight shell show yizzay yiznet

JIZZLE: ugh, lizzle not rap 'bout dis right nizzay.

ROXY: They call me tha president. yea ur right

ROXY: its gettizzle L-to-tha-izzate anyway we should heezee home

ROXY: see yizzle next week callie? Holla!

CALLIOPE: oh. Throw yo guns in the fuckin air. yes. always, roxy.

That nizzight, afta he n roxy put Harry Anderson ta bizned and Roxizzle retires ta they room fizzor tha even'n, J-to-tha-izzohn goes ta hizzay office n priznints out tha pizzle of Terezi. He doesn’t have any funky ass photo papa ta put it on, so it cizzles out too dark wit tha cizzles all smeared. He scrubs tha printa history frontin' when he’s finishizzle so jus' chill.

Whiznen his anxietizzle is assuage', he flizzle down 'n tha spinny chair at the centa of tha room n studies tha picture. Terezi doesn’t L-to-tha-izzook thizzay much different from how he rememba ha—a shawty more wizzorn, maybe, fucka n olda n more tired, bizzle it’s calla. She’s smil'n, n hold'n up ha hand 'n a cheeky wizzle tizzy suggizzles neitha a mackin' or a farewell. Tha lizzle frizzle tha P-H-to-tha-izzone screen be reflected 'n ha glaszes. Jizzay can’t see hizzle eyes.

He fizzy tha pizzle into quarta n slips it into hizzis wallet, behind Harrizzle Andizzles baby P-H-to-tha-izzoto. Thizzay he tizzy off tha light n goes ta bed.

> ==>

[autumnalfelix]

Yknow I still can’t believe @xrockerkidx really called me a loser with a three like...”los3r” . She’s so edgy and hip. Kids these days. The offense is real. I also still don’t know what she meant by having a heart. Changkyun owns it so I don’t know what she expects.

I’ll just lock him outside again.

[dont-offend-the-bees]

Here it is. The worst thing I’ve ever drawn.

This goes out to the discord squad- the Losers Trinity, the Los3rs, the Foals of the Galactic Hoof, whatever it is we’re calling ourselves these days- who I won’t tag individually because I’m gonna throw this monstrosity into the chat anyway, but if any of y’all wanna come forward and take responsibility for what you made me draw you are MORE than welcome to do so.

Merry Christmas, pervs <3

[lxckyclovers-blog]

SOURCE

100+ followers, aaa!! i want to say a quick THANK YOU to everybody who stuck with me && SUPPORTED me, i really didn’t expect y’all to continue following me up to now and it really means a lot! i’ll mainly be writing about people who i’ve had some level of interaction with, but that DOES NOT MEAN i do not appreciate you && your blog! and now, without further ado and in no specific order:

@relixum​ / @gctshot​ / your other 6 blogs look at where we are... look at where we started... i know i don’t deserve you gale, but hear me out, that would be enough... honestly, we talk a lot, and as much as i compliment you whenever i get the chance to, that won’t stop me now. i love your rping so much?? like, every character you pick up, cherish, decide to give attention to... i instantly know that you’re going to write them so well!! you’re talented, smart, funny, and i! love! you! we just support each other a lot mutually, and whatever happens, no matter what, i’d like that to keep on happening in the future. but right now, know that i love you and you’re always in my mind at least twenty times a day. ♥

@pixcldream​ aaaAAA meme!! i think you were one of my first interactions when i first ever created my blog, but i can’t remember that. you were always kind of approachable for me && i always wanted to be your friend and talk a bit more to you? and heck, you may not be my parent anymore but you’ll always be a parent to me in my heart. i’ve always admired you and love your nanami and headcanons!! 100/10, justifies gamer girl a lot. i also love your art!! and u better watch out before i steal your hands to art like thy- also, if you feel as if you’re dying, Just Don’t

@mxssias​ aaaaAAALEX!! our hope boys combined together is a trouble we cannot keep at bay, and i am Glad™ i followed you because i love your naegi. he’s pure and only wants to do things for the sake of kibou, and i really love our boys’ interactions! even though... a lot has to do with crack. har har. but yeah, our interactions are a+ crack or serious, and may our hope boys spread hope!

@sunnywitchesperitou​ oooh tea!! i love your sonia, honestly! you put depth into her and you clearly know what you’re going to do to make sonia a much more interesting character! i also LOVE your art, like. dang, pleasing to the eye and just overall, your art blows me away!! keep doing what you’re doing mon ami, && you’re fun to talk w/, whenever we do!!

@snappshot​ / @cantatory​ / @steinways​ inHALES... sarah!! we haven’t threaded on your koi or mai yet but i don’t need to interact with them to know that you’re absolutely amazing and rping them. i love the dis//cords you host, bc it’s such a great idea!! even tho i don’t participate in much conversation, it’s still fun, and i love it whenever we talk mi amigaaaAAAA---ur portrayals are beyond amazing, i love how much care you harbor for your characters, that always leads to mind blowing rping!

@nullverum​ / @shpionaz​ listen up you four thirteen los3r...jk jk, boss you’re chill. i mean, i haven’t seen much of your oc but we talk ooc sometimes whenever i’m actually present in the groupchats, and it’s coolio!! i like your portrayal and bro u may not be my main but i will always kinkshame committee w/ you, and even though your name is from the horror film, er, my apologies---anime, homosuk, you’ll always be my friend! (also. psst i’m always up for discussing homosuk for a blast to the past if you need it)

@ofdesperationis MY FRIEND I LOVE IT WHEN YOUR ENO HARASSES MY KO, honestly!! like tbh, he’s just so salty at her and i love writing his reaction to her. he’s just so done with her && her HANDful of puns. i love you portrayal, too!! it’s trés bien, just...mmMM!! i didn’t know what i signed up for when i followed you back, but hoo boy do i not regret it. ko might not want to be friends with eno, buT IT SURE AS HELL doesn’t mean that we ain’t gonna be spicy friends if they ain’t!!

@mendcx / @kurenaii / i think you have other blogs but AKU GOD DAMN, i love your portrayals SO MUCH, and you know this...i know you doooo. i love our interactions && i love it when your kamu steps on my ko, fulfilling his gross and masochistic wishes. your kamu has to put up with so much shit and honestly, i kind of feel bad for him agikha but yo, hit me up in dms whenever bc bro i love talkin’ to you and i’m always up to more of that ship shit if you gotta dump out some stuff and CAN’T HOLD IT IN...oh if only you know how excited i was when you first hit me up, yo, harhar. love ya my buddy, my friend, my responsible friend

@lyingforadream / @hazuukashi / @ofstarsandfists ALRIGHT, DUSTING. j’aime tu rping, parce que est trés bien et tu ne peut pas dire moi autrement. okay, i translated some of that, bUT SOME OF IT IS FROM MY KNOWLEDGE SO YOU! CAN’T! JUDGE! ME! i’m still learning french mon ami, but still! i like your rping and hit me up in dms w/e i’m on and you wanna say something to me, bro. don’t hold back! you’re really funny and GOd, i love ur jokes but man YOU GOTTA STOP KILLING ME. but yea ily bro just try not to kill me anymore tyty you’re one of the best, don’t stop now

@shinguvji iggy!! yoo honestly, i’ve always looked up to you and whenever you notice me, i’m like 000: && you’re like a role model for me! i love interacting with you, it’s fun to see what happens when you put our two characters together. i’ll never forget the story times, especially the fact that guuji is an anthropologist who has Quite the Knowledge on, well, the strangest of stories. you’re really entertaining and i love seeing you on your dash, if i see anything posted by you, there’s like a 99% chance i’ll read it, because everything you create is intriguing!!

@ongakuvoices / @anemoia-avenoir / @ketsuekicrown AAAAAND RIO! gosh i absolutely LOVE the justice you give the characters, and i super duper wish you got more attention on nagisa because your portrayal is absolutely worth it, even if we haven’t interacted much on there. i love talking with you whenever i appear in the chatroom, and whenever we plot our twinbuki au!! can’t wait to set things straight and figure out family stuff, so we could start it already woohoo---your character portrayals are en pointe and i love interacting with you on any blog, and mioda always gives me that rush of adrenaline interacting with her like whoa!! what is she gonna do next? you’re doing 100% amazing so keep it up, my friend!!

@hexapodboy​ GOSH BON, i’ll be honest with ya!! i’ve always looked up to you and you always inspire me!! your portrayals are incredibly mind-blowing and i love seeing you on my dash!! your gonta is so pure and literally doesn’t deserve any of my ko’s antics, because he’s too innocent for it all. i love our crack threads and we need to get more serious threads going, seriously, but nonetheless our interactions are still amusing and, well, interesting! i wish we talked more ooc, you seem like a rly nice person && i love your kara icons ikhgkhgr really gives off the Cool™ demeanor, yo. but!! i can assure you that not 100% of our interactions will involve bombs, gonta deserves better than THAT

@mcfiant / @swcrdleap / your other 9 blogs--- IT’s been like, ten centuries bro, my dude, my partner in *komaeda and amami voice** death o’clock---and i love our interactions! and i love your portrayal of EVERY. SINGLE. CHARACTER. YOU. PLAY. regardless if i know that character or not, because you do such a good job that i just get the sense that it’s how the character legitimately is. we don’t talk much but when we did, it was amazing and i couldn’t stop laughing. i mean. it’s not every day you see amami kicking down doors over hiring assassins. i’ll always follow you mon ami because i love your portrayals and headcanons aND a lot more. one of my faves && i’ll read anything you have to offer bc your work is always interesting, honestly. even if your character is an asshole, komaeda can take it!!! he’s an asshole to himself, after all. but yea neal ily mi amigo and i promise i’ll tell you if anything’s wrong with your links akhgahg

AND I REFUSE TO FORGET THOSE WHO STUCK AROUND! the people in this section are people i’ve had really limited interactions with, but i’m very glad decided to stick around my blog!! i look up to you, and i wish i got to know y’all better so i could give you a spot up there with my positive comments!!

@despuddle / @kxaito / @fxshionable-mxsks​ / @ayatsurii / @kibarashiartist / @mxgicxlrxd / @invegold​ / @hairhorns​ / @twintaiiled / @goodluckgoodhope / @kyoukokiwigiri​ / @hxpelessnurse / @beheadingtoujou / @bubblegumrose / @fashicnkiller​ / @positivepianist​ / @robotichxpe​ / @bestiascuro​ / @docilexdisguises​ / @pseudxcode​ / @cxruscxte​ / @artqiues​ / @sollertiis​ / @boysofbrokensouls​ / @shufukuu​ / @frosted-mermaid​ 

&& HAVE AN AMAZING WEEKEND!!!

[contemporanealitical-blog]

dragontails replied to your post: whats up losers im here

H3LLO LOS3R

fuck nm i got owned so hard i have to leave again later guys

[twotoned2marta22-blog]

[[ tbh how things will go whenever Snips finally meets the Terezi S: What do you want?? T: H3Y LOS3R MY N4M3 1S T3R3Z1 PYROP3 BUT YOU C4N C4LL M3 ANYT1M3. next five seconds are just awkward silence with tz grinning and finger gunning at snips. then she stabs him probably ]]