#what a good hug though
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I think he's very good to me. I like him. Don't you find it strange that I like him? The world always felt lonely. Since he appeared he's taken care of me and been good to me. Gradually he became part of my world.
#blue canvas of youthful days#chinese bl#china bl#bl drama#bl series#asianlgbtqdramas#asian lgbtq dramas#tan yin x lao liu#bcoyd#what a good hug though#路过我年少时光的蓝色
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The Watchers in my AU are meant to be complicated and confusing. It’s part of why Grian stays for so long, why he’s so conflicted and why it bothers him to the point of venting to Mumbo.
They can be very kind, they do love him, they compliment him on everything. He gets gifts and everything given to him.
But on the other hand, bc they love him, they can be critical, telling him why that and why this, not that not this, they have pretty high standards for Beings that have seen everything already, not easy to genuinely impress.
They give him food, as parental figures should, anything he asks, but that’s sorta the problem, he always has to ask, there’s no way around this, no independence. He can ask for ingredients to cook by himself, but they’ll watch him.
He’s given clothes to wear, always within Watcher standard, dark and loose garments, open for his wings. He’d honestly prefer brighter colours, but that’s not rly a choice.
They tell him he’s special, he was chosen, better than the rest, a champion, a hero, and while it pets his ego, he feels pressure, they went out on a limp for him and he still can’t do enough. There is so much guilt.
Being here in the end messes with his psyche a bit, he’s much shorter than everyone, he has to rely on everyone, they all treat him like a kid, petting his hair or moving him via his shoulders instead of asking. He accidentally leans into this sometimes as a subconscious coping mechanism, he cries easier than he thinks he should. Tantrums where he has to press his face into his hands, or grumble and stomp off. He always has to apologize.
Despite being treated like a child, he is a Watcher child, so he studies a lot, he trains a lot. If he throws up from training, that’s no excuse (well by Flora’s standards)
He does feel a sort of comfort or safety around Aether, She’s lenient with him, but they’re definitely still not equals. She still hides things from him She thinks is too serious, She’s still overtly positive. He thinks abt Her sometimes, in hindsight he knows it was a family dynamic, and he feels guilt abt this too.
The Watchers love him, but they are ultimately overbearing, overwhelming, and frankly quite scary if you don’t play by their rules. Grian has reason to be cautious, the silent threats that hang over his head, never directly said to him, but traitors are cast out, if you’re not worthy you don’t deserve these gifts of wings or eyes. I think he’s convinced if they ever find him they’ll rip his eyes out with talons.
He won’t admit that he likes the attention sometimes, when his efforts are acknowledged and/or praised, when his hair is brushed. He wants their approval.
However, this is the only ‘human’ contact he gets. He doesn’t have anyone else, so it’s taken with a grain of salt how genuine his feelings are abt the attention.
#evoAU#im still obsessed with this au 😭🎉#random bits of rambling bc I like the dynamic. watchers are morally grey I think. they do both good and bad things. they’re righteous#a bunch of angels adopt a human adult . what will happen#he developes a lot of problems bc of this though. definitely did more damage than good to him#it’s soo………. mom am I still young#i think martyn hugs him at some point and Grian’s brain short circuits#i don’t want strictly angst. a lot of the time watcherd are written as completely evil so I went this route#(tho the angst evil Watcher fics are good 👍 I wasn’t jabbing at anyone🫶)
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there is a difference between being born to a throne, maliciously vying for a throne, stealing a throne, and having a throne thrust upon you when you are already in the midst of an identity crisis. And I fear Loki's place in the line of succession has people unable to differentiate between any of these
#you can't really argue he planned the extent of Thor's downfall#that was all Odin#Loki didn't force Thor to invade Jotunheim he isn't even the one who gave Thor the idea -- Thor did that all on his own!#that he was doing waswasa @ thor didn't help but wasn't really crime worthy on its own#Thor himself took time convincing the other warriors to be okay with the trip despite the treason and danger involved#like. what. Thor can't differentiate good advice from bad and is emotionally volatile and reckless and that's Loki's fault?#THOR was the one who got them past Heimdall too#the entire ordeal inadvertently showed off the favouritism Thor was receiving in comparison to Loki#even though Loki was the one supposedly so easily influencing Thor to such an extent#call Thor a puppet the way he--wait. no. that sounds weird. uhhhhh#you get the point#people will claim Loki was all up in there rearranging Thor's mental processes to cause his downfall#when really it was Loki doing the bare minimum instigation and watching things only devolve from there#because Thor WAS reckless and immature ?? and he WAS quick to anger and enjoyed exerting his power with violence ??#Loki didn't STEAL THE THRONE FROM THOR he literally just is implied to undermine the coronation#that's not even confirmed but we assume it's true that he let the frost giants in near the casket etc.#Loki has his own actual crimes that he did against Thor and hugging his bro's arm and saying 'you're soooooo strong and correct' was not on#even if you manage to argue Loki was cheering Thor on for the invasion (he wasn't) it was clearly to dob Thor in with Odin#which he did when he had some guard inform Odin#that Odin's chosen punishment was for Thor's disobedience aside stop blaming Loki for the damage ODIN inflicted on him#focus on Loki making up lies to Thor about how Odin died instead like at least Loki DID SOMETHING for that#you can even ascribe as evil a motive as you want there bc Loki was slipping fr#twirling his hair and telling Thor he's smarter about the realm's safety than the king was on the normal scale#you want to talk morals go look at how eager Thor was to invade mass destroy and massacre in the other realm#and expected Odin to 'finish them off! together!' bc he was power high on whatever bloodlust pheromones battle apparently imitates for him#sigh. this is why you can't have nice things Thor. no Loki you're barely any better. sit down. have a cookie.
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Annatar during chapter 39 of The Harrowing by Chthonion~
And then doodles with some of my favourite bits from the afore mentioned chapter -
I've been meaning to do stuff from this chapter since it came out cause it is amazing- (in a 'wanting to suffocate Annatar with hugs and cups of tea, and the collateral sufferers too- like getting Maedhros back to Fingon for recuperation' kind of a way) - at revealing just how messed up Annatar's mindset is. I definitely recommend the Maedhros pov as well- the amount of '... I don't think I even want to unpack that statement' and 'seriously. We have gone over this. At least three times. In the last twenty minutes. Why do you not get it??' that goes through his head during that conversation is just- Amazin~
:D
This fic is really cool and I highly recommend it to anyone even vaguely into lotr or the Silmarillion.
:D
@chthonion
>:D
#the harrowing#lotr#silmarillion#silm art#fanfic fanart#sauron#annatar#maedhros#maglor#frustration#in all its forms#hehehehe#internal facepalming#breaking news#unhealthy mindset revealed!#:0#shocking i know#never would have seen it coming~#(i was actually surprised at the depth of the 'oh dear... that's... that's not good' in this chapter though-)#very 'annatar needs hugs' inducing#:)#another part I appreciated was the#maedhros: 'what are you trying to fix exactly?'#annatar: 'I made it worse'#maglor: 'by existing?'#annatar: ....#me: *cackling maniacally -'he did not just say that- oh that is too good-'#also all the 'oh dear... promises huh. A bit more than a promise you say..' *glances at the two feanorians nervously-#yeah. I love this chapter.#:):):)
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Day Six: Alternate Universe
#lego monkie kid#lego monkie kid fanart#monkie kid#monkie kid fanart#lmk#lmk fanart#lmk mayor#monkie kid mayor#lmk macaque#monkie kid macaque#shadowpuppet#lmk shadowpuppet#shadowpuppetweek#I was originally going to draw my Good Omens AU for this but then I spontaneously decided to change my mind last minute#sorry guys- no gay celestial and demons- only angst#I do wonder what Macaque is thinking in this moment#it was probably only until now did he realise “oh shit the world is actually ending”#and all he can do is just... accept it#in a way he probably welcomes it because he is just so so tired from living a life he's not actually supposed to be living#Mayor is only happy- as they should be- destiny has come as their Lady intended it- they embrace the final conclusion for all it is#it's funny though because it's not them who watches as the fire will eventually consume the two- it is Macaque who faces the blaze#anyways I was gonna put a cringe alert for the hug but then I realised I can do whatever the hell I want
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@rwrbmovie & @rwrbsource’s rwrbweek:
Day 4 | Little Detail - Continuous Shots
#red white and royal blue#rwrbweek#rwrb movie#graphics#alexander claremont diaz#henry fox mountchristen windsor#it gives things a more intimate natural feel and i love it#also how some of them are very dynamic vs ones that are very still and how they compliment whats going on in the scene#so good!#the one at the end is absolutely fucking bonkers there are so many extras and it moves through like three locations#its actually two shots but they blend them together almost seamlessly so it looks like one#you can just see where it switches while people are running past alex and henry hugging#didnt include it in the gifs though because once you see it you cant unsee haha
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Elain using her gardening and cooking skills to create antidotes, salves, poisons, etc to help in war.
Elain's visions being essential to the success of the NC and their allies to stay ahead of their enemies.
Elain working with Rhys to keep strong mental shields up so people can't use her visions against them.
Elain getting training from Azriel on how to use daggers effectively, how to be stealthy and fade into the shadows.
Azriel helping Elain in the kitchen, using his hands to make warm food for his family.
Azriel helping Elain in the garden, planting seeds and getting his hands dirty in a way that helps bring life into the world instead of taking it away.
#just things i wanna see happen#elriel#elain making antidotes like we saw in ACOWAR would be really cool though#and i think it would make sense with what her skills are#pro elain#pro azriel#pro IC#pro elriel#azriel learning that his hands can be used for good makes me want to hug him forever
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American-validated Frenchge 🥖
transcript below
[Video Transcript begins:
[Video starts mid-sentence]
Etoiles: —and you put this face— next to the camera! Like this!
Foolish: (laughing) You’re so French!
Etoiles: I’m so French, that’s my main problem. Like I’m so French, I try sometimes to nerf myself and be like, less French
Etoiles: But that feels good to hear this because you say I’m so French and like, some racist people in France think I’m not because I’m Arabic too, so—
Foolish: Ohhhh
Etoiles: —that feels good too, you know
Foolish: No dude, you seem like a French ass French person—
Etoiles: (laughing)
Foolish: I don’t know how else to put it. Simply put
Etoiles: That feels good, man. I was saying hello to Tarik and all his chat was saying like Frenchge, the emote they are putting—
Foolish: Oh yeah
Etoiles: —the emote they are putting. Yeah, yeah, yeah
Video Transcript ends.]
#foolish gamers#etoiles#étoiles#be like foolish . don’t be racist ❤️#god when etoiles first showed up on screen he fucken leaped at foolish to hug him it was so <33 missed them and tinza soso much#mostly wanted to clip this because etoiles saying ‘that’s my problem i’m so french’ is exactly what he said to rae during his first stream#ever with the roomies and co streamers over a year ago now . and that was the stream that kinda kickstarted his english streams forever so#it was an awww moment for me :)#though i thought hey its also useful to clip bc etoiles doesn’t really make mention of the racism he deals with when hes doing english#content . in part i suppose bc much of it is inherently linked with the french sociopolitical scene which isn’t particularly accesible to#anglophones . but since i’ve seen some erm . ignorant takes sometimes over the past year and months i think it Could do some people good to#actually hear about the shit he deals with . like he gets the ‘go back to your country’ type shit too yknow it was especially bad during the#french elections this past summer#it is crazy tho how racist politicians can debate the validity of your nationality back home while foreigners if you spend time among them#in their country will wholly accept you and your nationality with it#5/11/24
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*appears in asks* I give Fake Peppino a belly rub. That is all.
oh! looks like he wasn't expecting that, but he always loves getting belly rubs!
he's very happy with the gesture though 🤗
#hug time 🤗🤗🤗#hope you're not getting squeezed too hard...... he's not exactly the best with boundaries.#my art#pizza tower#pizza tower fake peppino#what a good boy though!!! we love a good goopy boy in this house.
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We’re getting closer and closer to the first anniversary of my moms death and I’ve realized I haven’t let myself feel it. Like truly feel it. I’ve been pushing and pushing and forcing it down and today it really fucking hit me. I don’t have my mom anymore. We’re never going to make up and have a real relationship. She’s never going to get sober or clean. I’m never going to hug her again. She’s just gone. I don’t have my mom. And I can’t fix that. How do I fix it now that she’s gone.
#grief#delete later#I think about the fact that I didn’t hug her the last time I saw her all the time#I was still so angry#and she made such a big deal out of me not hugging her#that I just fucking refused#and now I’m never going to get to do that again#and then the next time I saw her was two days before her death and I d#couldn’t even think of what to say even though everyone kept telling me she could hear me#and then my grandmother tried to push me into talking and I snapped#and said I had nothing to say to the woman who abandoned me my whole life#and I don’t remember if I ever told her I loved her#and I’m so scared that the last thing she heard me say was something so hateful#she wasn’t a good person but she was still my mom#and I didn’t even hug her when she was dying
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*Nomnomnoms Fake Peppino*
#pizza tower#art#my art#pizzarinkau#pizza tower au#nomnomnomnom#fake peppino#RR!fakepeppino#chews arm casually#i think you’re confusing him#i dont think he really cares though#i dont think he’d taste any good… who fucking knows what he’s made out of#idrc im still gonna hug him#im yapping a whole fucking lot#im sorry for that lmao#artists on tumblr
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New Onesided!Radiostatic scenario just dropped thanks to me listening to musicals that just so happen to have Christian Borle in them: What if during their friendship, back when Vox wasn't quite an overlord yet but rising the ranks, Alastor took him to Rosie's emporium for a wardrobe makeover. In a "Clothes make the man" or "Presentation is vital to any self respecting overlord" kinda way and just wanting to help out his friend.
Basically the song "Take it like a man" from the Legally Blonde musical happening except cut all the parts where you see Elle clearly reciprocating his feelings and like checking him out in the new suit and stuff (Which I low key did here by accident lol) Like Alastor is just trying to be supportive and introduce two of his buddies to one another in one go. Meanwhile Vox is beginning to realize his feelings™ for Alastor and totally misreading the whole situation
#also in case people didn't notice Emmett here looks like he thinks they're gonna kiss but Elle pulls him into a hug#I actually like the idea of Vox being kinda awkward and dorky but gradually grew into his current persona#(that dorkiness is still there though...he still wears a stripped sweater vest)#I guess alastor and rosie did what they could with this wardrobe makeover but there's only so much they could do#I cut out a whole chunk of the middle but idk if that was a good move or not the parts I kept are honestly the most relevant#radiostatic#radiosilence#onewaybroadcast#staticlovetune#hazbin hotel#musicals#legally blonde the musical#this is what my tired brain came up with and I still feel like I want to post it
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Sooooo thoughts on episode 12 🍅
very nice (in pain)
#miorine rembran#g witch#the witch from mercury#my art#ok i knew people were gonna get ko'ed but not like this#the animation was sooooo good though#blood looked very chunky and thicc and shiny its great#the part when suletta was having a panic attack? 10/10 could feel it her eyes scary af#the chillsssssssss#and more info about mio's mom is always great#and all the goddamn parallels to ep1#oh and at the beginning part where sophie's been talking to herself and suletta can't hear her was so fucking funny to me#bob continues to be the show's punching bag#no 5 continues to be an asshole#shaddiq is a bloody bastard i cant believe i used to like him#aerial was super cool with all the lasers#all the earth house kids need a hug#or multiple#idk whats with vim but honestly i could care less about him do not rest in peace#the animation of the show is hecking good#its so tasty#i dont think this gets talked about a lot but the end credits part#miomio flailing about and desperate to keep her dad from harm was very heartbreaking#she doesnt even like him but he's the only blood-related fam she has left and even throws herself in front and she def knows it's pointless#THERE WAS NO HESITATION#im gonna cry#im crying#and fully believe that sulemio will sort out the bullshit going on around them theyre so important each other#and i hope shaddiq gets blended like soup no sympathies for him#become the corn potage you were meant to be
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I'm planning to write for whumptober and flufftober (probably like drabbles only or 1k or less) but I've also got genuine ideas on the table like
- the baseball au (longfic)
- the timeline zero story (longfic)
- the hibimiyu story where miyu attempts to give isami robo dating advice (oneshot)
- the miyu/kunus one (oneshot) (this one has been difficult to think about logistically lol)
- the daidara/titan company movie night lmao (oneshot)
- something with ryoma....
#matts markers#what ive found is im really good at thinking up crack/borderline crack story ideas#but then i get bogged down thinking of how to make them work anr they turn into serious attempts#i hope that i Will be able to write all of these at some point though and do them as much justice as they have in my head#the ryoma thing is so funny to me i really wish i could make something out of it.#because its like. im just imagining that smith comes back n everyone hugs and its all awesome#and like 5 minutes later its like ZOOP! and ryomas back naked in an empty field like. well wtf was that.#i knowwwwwww afterstory this doesnt happen but. could u imagine.
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Frequently thinking of how Forthing tried to offer Temeraire some comfort after Laurence's "death" despite how he had been treated by him all the time prior. I think it just says a lot about him as a person idk
#And all that only to get Tem being absolutely rancid to him in return of course#he's honestly probably like. a really comforting presence to those who aren't tem idkkkk#Like he's Trying#anyways. forthing gives great hugs truther idc he's broad and for what? to not give good hugs? no way.#granby also gives great hugs I think. he has so much Arm to use for it due to his beanpole-ness#birds-chirps#I have so many thoughts about this man#All in my head. Forever <3#most of those thoughts are too 'interpretation-y' to share though
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2023 art summary ヽ(´w`) i ended up not posting most of my stuff for the latter half (yet) but i’m really happy with a lot of what i worked on!!!!!
#my art#art summary#2023 art summary#art school is actually so fun sometimes did you know that. i made so many fun comics and experimented with new stuff. sometimes i wasn’t#any good at what i tried but it’s still sooo rewarding when i improved even just a little. and it feels REALLY good#to be able to show off some skills or familiarity with materials that i use less often these days#bc i can show my marker or colored pencil drawings and my classmates who have only seen my digital stuff are excited about it sometimes :-]#bc i really just like working in a lot of different mediums and i’m really thankful that my love for art and art making hasn’t dwindled#even though of course i have dormant periods and times where i don’t feel like making art or i feel frustrated with what i am able to do#it always comes back around. just like how i always feel better whenever i feel depressed#and i just love art and colors and i love the world and the people in it and myself and all the people i have been#anyways i hope you all feel happy or you will soon hugs and kisses goodnight (extremely loud thunk on the floor)
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