#well. lets just say its been a while.
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
An old Misty drawing from last year May
#clemart#toontown corporate clash#ttcc#Rainmaker#Misty Monsoon#May 2023 exactly. to get the specifics its like May 20something#I'm going to redraw the bigger image this is from but I'm going to be replacing them entirely with a more fitting character#So I thought it'd only be fair to show this to the Misty fans because I don't really draw them anymore#I originally choose them in the drawing becaue they were my favorite to draw but as soon as I figured out how to draw that Brain#well. lets just say its been a while.#That brain is also in this old drawing but he looks ugly and also I'm going to redraw him so you all dont get to see that#^ this redraw is coming later i havee a seasonal holiday idea that is more time limited eheh
111 notes
·
View notes
Text
i have been a ball of depression lately as well as my physical health worsening pretty severly this past week due to stress and so my friends have been. trying so hard to get me to get out and do things and its very sweet but i feel bad because the whole time i’m just a total mess
#they say they dont mind but i need to really. stop#im stuck.#and i know it’s hard on my friends to see me like this since i’ve been doing a lot better and now am back to my old habits#but i felt bad because they took me out shopping and to dinner tonight and i just had a headache and was limping and couldnt stop talking#about the recent death in my family and all the stress from classes and socially and how lost i feel#and i just wanted so bad to just. enjoy myself but i couldnt#but my friends know about how severe my depression is and are all very used to it#its in fact more normal than not. but i was really. feeling at my best for several months so the crash back down to not eating and sleeping#and being unable to fully tidy my room and all that stuff has been. difficult for me as well as those around me#it’s been normal for me for so long to live terribly that taking care of myself for a while and then losing the drive to has been. hard#im trying to get better but i slide back down#i need to work on my constant self loathing but i keep walking around just. conviced im such a burden and being sad makes it even worse#i just. am always overcompensating for my lack of#ability to love myself with just. constantly showering everyone around me with love and its. hard for me when i dont have the energy to do#even that anymore. its hard to let people take care of me when i just want to take care of them all the time
72 notes
·
View notes
Text
so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-
but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again
(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)
i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)
weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward
but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.
right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#ganondoodles rants#sorta#suicide attempt mention in the IRL stuff im talking about in the following tags btw#theres some construction stuff on our house going on#and my father is extremely stressed about it#he used to be very explosive- being silent and then exploding out of nowhere .. probably left me with lasting damage yippie-#but now he much more lets it eat at himself bc hes old and feels bad for the past stuff so now it makes him irritated and depressed#my older brother is the most normal cis straight guy you can imagine and incredibly impatient and bossy (you CANNOT talk with him)#(brother doesnt live in our house)#and while hes helping out hes doing it exactly how my father doesnt like and since you cant talk to the guy (explosive +200) it stresses hi#to the point of my father yesterday saying that “it would have been better if i had just died back in the day”#likely referring to the time when he was drafted for the military against his will and tried to kill himself#which i learned only like .. a year ago- theres so little my parents tell me ....#its like my mother telling me- while my father was in hospital for heart surgery- that she not only almost died back when i was a young tee#and only survived bc of some incredibly unebelievable lucky coincidences (medics on a travel being there that knew what she had-#-while our local doctors said welp- nothing we can do lady AND them beign there with a helicopter and emergency transferring her#to antoher bigger hospital while giving her immediate treatment our local one didnt do- AND at the big one just so happened to have-#-an expert on that illness in the facility when she arrived who was able to narrrowly save her life#BUT ALSO while she was recovering and weak and frail as a dust bunny witnessing someone stealing hospital surplies-#not noticing she was in the room at first (which .. the nurses left her in the nurse room while going on break ... which uhm .. yeah cool)#and if my mother hadnt acted in time like she was fully asleep and the lady stealing stuff beign in hurry- she might have killed her#without my mother being able to fight back bc she could barely even talk (the nurses didnt want to believe her when they got back either)#ANYWAY that comment from my father brough me to tears#and my mom is trying out more ... other medication shes not prescribed in hopes of it helping agaisnt her many pains#but i worry it will interact with the other stuff shes on ...#and i worry so much about both of their mental and physical well being#always trying to be the one to calm them down or help with communication bc that is a big problem in this houesehold#but i myself am also a very much not normal and not medicated shut in who has trouble dealing even with my own feelings
33 notes
·
View notes
Note
Fighting DEMONS rn trying not to get invested in one piece to figure out wtf you're posting about!!!!
come here cyber.... we have this thang
#mp answers#i've been trying so hard not to be annoying to my bnha friends but if you will allow me to push this for this ask let me say 🙏#if you're afraid of the episode count for one piece the manga is a lot quicker read while being just as enjoyable because the art style is#an actual delight. its great its fantastic im absolutely in love with it#the series is soooo good and i know luffy can seem unappealing to people before they start but he's just SUCH a great character & continues#to be even now. the story is SO GOOD the characters are SO GOOD... theres so much lore and world building that its insane#if you read the manga we get 'cover stories' on what's going on with previous characters to see what theyre up to even though we moved on#from where we left them. a lot of these cover stories blend into the main story so well its just seamless#there's one where we get introduced to a character we dont see hundreds of episodes into the anime and they show up like; during the second#saga. the series is about traveling to other islands and every single arc has been tied to another in some way or form that shows up later#even if its sagas and sagas later- it still becomes relevant again!! it's a huge ongoing story and there isnt a single arc that feels like#it has no purpose (sans filler in the anime-but even then!! some filler arcs are really entertaining!)#it's emotional! its sad! its downright stupid and silly but GOD... you can feel the love that oda put into this series and his characters#and the emotions in the expressions and the messages the story gives off it just makes me UEUHGHHAHGHH!!!#it's all about the adventure and the romance of it all! its about the freedom it brings and bringing freedom to others!#its a series where treasure should be a focus given its pirates and the its a giant treasure hunt for the one piece and yet! and yet so man#of the characters treasures are things that are not coins and gems but people and promises and family and and#im going to EXPLODE i love one piece
202 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sepang 2006: After an exhausting race, Valentino Rossi brings a chair to the podium and sits down. Loris Capirossi joins him to sit on his lap.
#brr brr#//#lc65#going through my notes for that vale race rec post and I was gonna include some of these screenshots#but actually there's screenshots I want to include from parc fermé too because I think they're cute so. this gets its separate post#if you're wondering how that rec list is going btw I've currently got over eighty races listed I don't want to talk about it#this race deserves a lot more love tbh. one of the 2006 races nobody would ever shut up about if he'd won the title#but they don't suddenly stop being good races just because they ended up being in vain!! he was amazing to watch in 2006#two bits of context that really make this:#1) vale/loris were engaged in battle the whole race and vale overtook on the final lap before engaging in some?? uh. robust defence#which I feel like at least a few riders would at the very least have been mildly miffed at but!! not capirossi not with valentino#2) dani had like?? a deep cut in his knee and it was surprising he'd been able to ride let alone get a podium#you'll note he's the only guy standing while these two are doing their thing. another big win for empathy#one commentator is saying literally right after they stand up again that dani had gained the respect of his fellow riders that day#and you kind of feel like if they took his suffering THAT seriously they maybe wouldn't do all that but well!! anyway#alien tag
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
guys i caught a mouse at work today
#i was walking the tech guy back because one of our printers broke#and i opened the door like yeah its right back he- thats a mouse. thats a mouse sitting in the middle of the room#he was very small and i think very confused/freaked out because he just let me. scoop him up. into my gentle loving arms#like he tried to run a little but he didn’t seem to really know where to go#so i was just on the floor like trying to get ahold of this very tiny very pathetic mouse without hurting it#while saying hey um. dont mind me printers right there with a mouse half in my hands#printer guy brought me over a little basket he found and i scooped mousie into the basket#and then i had a mouse in a basket. so i went back into the lobby and went Guys i have a Mouse in a Basket#and then my supervisor escorted me outside and we found a nice little tree with some shade and little plants to dump him at#except hed been scrambling up the basket the whole time and i think hes just accepted his fate to live there forever by then#because he would Not get out of the basket. i had to very very gently scooch him out#and yeah. maybe i pet the mouse. what do you want from me. he was very small and cute and very soft and rabbies isnt real and cant hurt me#he was so fucking cute. oh my god he was so cute. i hope he does well for himself#coworker was like ‘youre just gonna put him outside to be somethings lunch?’#and i said well. better he be lunch for someone than die in a gluetrap in some dark corner of the office#slightly more dignified way to go. benefits something. but i will be praying for a long and happy life for him regardless#every single time ive seen a mouse in my life ive immediately gone ‘oh im fucking Getting You’ <- lovingly and adoringly#so far im 2 for 5. 40% accuracy rate of Getting That Sucker#which i dont think is too bad considering mice are very small and quick and good at not being getted
9 notes
·
View notes
Text
whatever og text i had in mind for this post about ko shibasaki looking like sayama in this movie is completely cancelled on account of utsumi (this character)'s first name being kaoru and i only found this out cause i was looking up her name just to be sure when making this post
like jesus christ i legally have to make this post now
#snap chats#they literally never say her first name in the movie. i think lol LIKE WHEN I FOUND OUT I WAS JUST 'NO FUCKING WAY'#i do have to be tbh and say her face /is/ a little more round than sayama's#and its absolutely predominantly because of how her bangs and wardrobe are so close to sayama's that i think she look like her#BUT I CAAAANT THE WHOLE MOVIE I WAS JUST THINKIN ABOUT SAYAMA... i miss her...#OH RIGHT THE MOVIE THOUGH noooo fuck you this movie was so good it actually made me want to write a summary for it LMAOOO#LIKE I LIKE WRITING SUMMARIES BUT IVE JUST BEEN SO LAZY ABOUT IT WITH THE PAST FEW THINGS IVE SEEN BUT GOD.#ignore the fact i finished this movie two hours ago i was too busy fiddling with a card holder kit but. ill make a post about that next--#THIS MOVIE THOUGH NOOOOO IT WAS SO GOOD //SCREAMS AND YELLS AND DESTROYS A SNOWGLOBE//#god the part where ishigami and yukawa are walking by the homeless and it just lingers on an empty spot.. LIKE I THOUGHT I WAS WACK#CAUSE I WAS LIKE 'hang on wasnt there a guy there last scene' and obviously there was since the shot lingered right#BUUUUTT WHEN IT WAS REVEALED DOWN THE LINE SHUT UPPP I LITERALLY YELLED IM SO GLAD. my roommates arent home..#on god i thought the movie was gonna end with utsumi and fukawa's convo from the beginning#and i was gonna make a gaf about how fukawa was acting irrationally because he was too in love LMAOOO#BUT THEN IT KEPT GOING AND. im so glad it did. ishigami valid tbh#id also cover up and take blame for AND ACTUALLY commit murder for a girl if she said hi to me and made me lunch while i was trying to kms#while fukawa and ishigami were talkin that first night tho i just thought of after the rain.. lol... maybe the mangaka was inspo'd by that.#anyway. this movie was great. it reminded me of sherlock but if it was directed well and actually let you solve the mystery too#CAUSE WHILE I WAS WATCHING THERE WERE POINTS WHERE I TOO WAS JUST 'hang on' AND I JUST POCKETED THE INFO FOR LATER#i kicked and screamed when ishigami was talking abut how he formats his tests LIKE I SAID 'oh you fucking slipped'#when ishigami called and told her he had a white envelope in there bitch i knew it was gonna be the stalker letter i YELLED#LIKE I LIKE HOW THE MOVIE SETS THINGS UP SO ABUNDANTLY. IT'S FUN SEEING IT FIT IN THE MOVIE LATER ON#the twist of there being two bodies was so fun tho cause at the start of the movie i was sure two murders happened the same night#so when it was played off as just one i was like Oh. Ok. im still stumped on how he snuck a body out of the apartment#but yk what one detail is like. whatever in comparison to the rest of the movie being fun to watch#god im running out of tags POINT IS. PLEAAASE watch this movie if you got two hours#ive left some minor warnings on my Watchlist doc but there's nothing. TOO extreme ??#i mean there's an aforementioned suicide attempt but aside from that it's nothing too grotesque. for an rgg fan ig#ok bye i have to ramble about the card holder i got <3
52 notes
·
View notes
Text
currently repeating "you are under no obligation to be good at the things you do for fun" to myself over and over
#this is in relation to dnd lol#i was trying out a new group and the dm seemed nice enough#and ive been interested in playing bards for a while so i said i might play one#and he went hard on ''oh you're the face you're the face'' and im like what if i just like the concept and don't want to be the face#is that ok my guy#and then i got scared out of playing a bard because im like oh well sometimes i just dont know what to say in a situation#and i just listen to other people talk so clearly i cant play a bard#but i was watching a dnd youtuber and she was talking about shy roleplayers and she gave some good advice but also ultimately said#you're under no obligation to be good at what you do for fun#and honestly? so true#anyway im not playing in that campaign because i think that while the guy was nice#his expectations were like. critical role levels and its like buddy im just here for a good time im not entertaining the masses lol#im having a hard enough time not beating myself up over my regular campaign all the time for no good reason lol lets not add onto it#lol anyway today i made myself a little eladrin bard who loves painting with her magic paint brush#and she sits next to my changeling warlock as characters i will play eventually#personal
11 notes
·
View notes
Text
me when im doing really awesome 👍🏻
#the way thats just spotify. on my phone.#and while ive been working on my laptop ive used youtube and well…… lets just say at seventeen is the only thing im listening to#just as soon as it ends im like oh shit time for another!!!!!!!#probably at least 20 today. like 20 yesterday and the day before etc. its a good song……
15 notes
·
View notes
Text
i know this has been said 473773474833 times by the kavetham/haikaveh shippers and probably even nonshippers, but i'll say it again. I finally finished the genshin summer event and did the little after quest in sumeru and.....every time kaveh is sneaking around trying not to be noticed coming out of alhaithams house it's just such a gay vibe. he's basically screaming "I can't be caught being gay in a homophobic society!" even if that's not what the game writers are *actually* saying. that's just how it comes off and they can't make it come off any other way. with hoyo's gay history, it makes me wonder if it's on purpose and all a cover-up to have a technically different reason for it so they can get away with it lmao but we will never know.
#lee text#genshins#i can acknowledge how gay they are without liking thr ship#flashback to several kavetham/haikaveh (whatevwr their ship name is) shippers on here attacking me over not liking the ship#trying to “educate” me on why theyre sk gay and why i should ship it#look i didnt say they arent gay af. and these shippers dismissed my feelings completely#i think it was after that one event with the competition thing that kaveh won? idk but just they way they interacted#the way alhaitham talked to kaveh and the way kaveh responded TRIGGERED A TRAUMA RESPONSE IN ME#which made me dislike the ship and their dynamic! i didnt CARE if he was well meaning. the way he talked to kaveh#triggered a fight or flight response in me because it sounded similar to how ive been talked to and kaveh getting upset was similar to#how ive reacted to the same words. you can also argue my family cares about me like alhaitham does kaveh and its how he helps#but it doesnt mean its the kind of help we need and it doenst traumatize us lmao#so i dont get why people were so angry at me for getting triggered by this ship and disliking it for that reason#while i can still admit that they are gay af and seem to get a long a bit better after that and i can tolerate them now#since its been a while and i dont remember it enough to have a trauma response when seeing them anymore lmao#but its just annoying that shippers can be so toxic 💀 they care more about their fictional men ship than me. a real person. weird#not tagging the ship so i dont get more angry shippers in my notes....but they found me last time with no tags so hi. dont yell at me again!#but maybe no one will care since im putting my “anti ship propaganda” in the tags this time and not the main post lmao#just dont read my tags so you dont get mad at me for being uncomfortable by this ship dynamic. but if youre reading this...its too late#leave me alone they arent real and i am so im more important right 😅#let me shame the shippers that dismissed my real feelings because they think their ship is more important than a real person lmao#you cant tell me im wrong when a trauma response isnt a choice and happens against your will 💀#BE ASHAMED YOU NERDS#I WILL BITE YOUR KNEECAPS#sorry i just had to vent lmao
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
Drawing from class two weeks ago, prof was introducing us to photoshop because not everyone had used it before, so those of us that were already familiar with it were goofing off lol
Small update; I have recently been given courage to come out and say that this blog will be temporarily put on hold. I'm not falling behind in my studies per se, but they've become such a massive source of stress that I can't focus/don't have time to draw for myself lately. I can confidently say my mental health is the worst it's been since last year; guilt for not talking to people and for not being more active on here is eating me alive, so I think it's best if I take at least one of those pressures off of myself.
When I'm back I'll likely have some classwork to show off, and maybe if the stars align, some personal drawings too haha. Until then, I'll still be somewhat active on my alt (@dawntheduckrb) and might even post some doodles there, so feel free take a peeksies if you want :D (posts are all over the place there though, so don't follow if you don't want dash clutter lol)
Sorry for any worry I caused; see y'all in May :)
#sorry for up and half going away like that#am not doing well at all#and its been a while since ive actually posted#(ive actually made two posts since the cat one but privated both bc silly brain)#so i wanted to formally say i am stepping away so people dont think im like#dead#so uh#im alive#my brain is just eating itself alive right now#and i gotta prioritize the could-leave-me-in-debt-for-the-rest-of-my-life event over the beloved hellsite (regrettably)#not that i wasnt already prioritizing it (my upload rate has plummeted since january)#but i want to let yall know what is going on#I've noticed more people on my alt lately that dont follow me; so if that was yall checking in on me#then thank you so much#it didnt go unnoticed
22 notes
·
View notes
Text
Right so I just remembered an old idea that I had.
One where Vlad? Just absolutely stops showing any interest in Maddie, Jack, Daniel and Amity Park as a whole.
Why? Well, you can say he finally saw the reality of Maddie, managed to let go of his hatred of Jack enough that he stops trying to kill him, is utterly uninterested in Daniel now that he's been disillusioned with Maddie and that, really well and truly the only reason he stayed in Amity was because of Maddie and Daniel.
I guess you could see this as a somewhat redemption in that he just does not care for the reasons that put him on the path of villainy anymore and just decides to become a 'regular' person. Well, regular enough while being the CEO of a billion dollar company.
He's fully devoted himself to taking care of and making sure that Vladco thrived under his care and, while it did do so while he was multitasking with trying to win over Maddie he now had no reason to split his attention away from his company.
Vlad always has some type of item on him that allows him to do his work, a phone, computer, iPad, etc, etc. He's fully devoted to his company now and nothing else, and that made him dangerous. Along with his cunning he's made quite a lot of enemies, destroyed some, you name it.
Specifically, one of them being Lex Luthor. They're enemies in the business world, though Vlad has no intention of stepping into the superhero scene at all, he was already a villain before and now he's stepped away from all of that nonsense and focused on what actually mattered.
Like his company, obviously.
He makes a comment or two about such things to Lex Luthor, not that he was a villain of course, but such things that his company must truly not need him if he can go galivanting about with that Kryptonian every week or so.
Lex Luthor, obviously, does not take kind to such statements. Though the media seems to be eating it up.
Then enters Danny. Who was increasingly paranoid about Vlad, thinking that he was just lying in wait to spring some kind of trap to try and get his mom, kill his dad or take him as his son.
At first, his not being around was nice, he even resigned as Mayor and left someone else in charge and just seemed to fade from Amity Park as a whole! Then those days turned to weeks, and Danny was uneased, expecting something to happen and for Vlad to make a comeback of some sort.
Only for that to not happen.
Then a month passed, and Danny is very paranoid at the time, thinking that Vlad is obviously doing something and that he should go find him to stop him before whatever he was doing was done!
Which leads to him breaking into Vladco and gunning straight for Vlad. Only for the man to be utterly uninterested in him as a whole. He tries to question Vlad, what sort of despicable and fruitloopish plan he's currently working on to kill his dad and marry his mom.
Only for Vlad to lay it on thick that he's doing nothing but being a normal CEO. There is no plan, there is no grand invention or gathering of forces, or any making of clones. There is nothing going on other than Vlad taking a step back for once in his adulthood, taking a proper look at the situation and just finding that it's not worth it anymore.
He's resigned himself to the life of a hardworking CEO, and that's it.
Of course, Danny doesn't exactly believe him but decides to head back home. Then a few more months pass, and Danny's life is finally stable, his grades are going up, he had more time to his best friends, his parents know his secret and accept him and ghosts don't even attack anymore!
But something was missing. His life was quiet. Too quiet and that? That disturbed Danny much more than he thought it would. There isn't any main villain anymore that's constantly in his life that he has to fight against, everything is peaceful, and ghosts don't attack him or his town anymore.
It disturbs him.
Greatly.
So then something unexpected every happens Danny barely gives it any thought, marches right on over to Vlad and throws the blame on him because obviously it's his fault! Vlad, to his part, is utterly unamused by Danny's continuous throwing of blame onto him, and doesn't give the time of day.
So Danny forces him too, and when Vlad finally gives him the attention he denies any involvement in the act, to which Danny denies his denial and Vlad denies Danny's denial to his denial.
Then Vlad calls Danny obsessive over his continuous clinging to their previous dynamic and Vlad, surprisingly, is actually a bit concerned and points this out to say that Danny should just stop all of this and live a normal (enough) life like he's doing now.
Unfortunately, the words he chose to get across this point-specifically the "Just like me" part- were not the right ones to say. Danny is hurt by this, and angry that he in anyway resembles Vlad at all and this causes him to attack him outright.
So, this leads to the general public to find out about Danny's existence, and as he attacked Vladco and Vlad Masters himself, people are questioning if this is the rise of a new villain and what his relation to Vlad Masters is.
#dc x dp#dp x dc#dpxdc#dp x dc crossover#dcxdp#dc x dp crossover#Vlad took a step back and decided that everything he's been doing is completely and utterly worthless#A very old ass idea that I had last year lmao and only remembered about now#Unfortunately Danny is not doing that well here-#Mostly because he keeps thinking that Vlad is doing something evil when in reality he's just stopped doing anything at all#Unless its being a CEO#Vlad decides to be a normal man for once and lets go of his obsessions with Maddie Jack and of course Danny and Amity Park by extension#Unfortunately Danny is clinging to their previous dynamic where he was the hero and Vlad the villain#Vlad sees this and tries to get Danny to stop clinging to it but he says the wrong words and that just pisses Danny off lmao#Honestly I don't really care much for obsessions but if I were to say something about it#I would guess that Vlad's shifted fully into being a workaholic CEO#While Danny's become one where he was a hero and Vlad the villain I guess?#I don't know don't really care much#Anyways#Danny is not the ghost king here and he never will be.#He's just a kid who unfortunately started to cling to a past dynamic because of paranoia I guess#Again this is an old idea and I really just recounted what I remembered while adding in a few bits and pieces there lmao
30 notes
·
View notes
Text
So I don't know if it was ever revealed how Duncan felt when we killed Malistaire all three times but I'm wondering if maybe some part of him could hate us for that too. Like you hear that and you go "but why. Malistaire was terrible and even Duncan knew that(?). Why would he hate you for getting rid of him."
But like I think it's so....... interesting in a very, very, very sad way how Duncan so easily latches onto anyone who directly feeds into his delusions of grandeur. And that's no fault of his own that he was manipulated by the nasty Schism but when you think about how desperately clung to the idea that Malistaire, easily one of the greatest necromancers any of us had ever heard of (at that time), somehow actually recognized Duncan's talents (even when canon supports that Duncan wasn't all that talented, at least no more than the next necromancer) and then praised him for it so often that Duncan believed that he would be the next Death Professor is. I mean ☹️
So like with that mindset I unfortunately feel like it would be quite easy to twist even Malistaire's death as something that's horrible and awful and all our fault. ESPECIALLY if the Schism was feeding into Duncan's already broken mind and shattered ego and was constantly telling him that everything bad that ever happened to him ever in his life was Our Fault. That's like a realistic conclusion that someone like Duncan could come to
And like, at this point in time, are Malistaire's crimes even a factor in how he thinks????? Was Duncan ever able to separate Malistaire's talent and skills and prowess from the terrible and awful things he did? If Duncan wasn't able to consciously tell that distinction in the first place I can't imagine it would be any better during the years he was being manipulated and isolated and lied to
Like in Duncan's mind it probably isn't, "maybe I shouldn't idolize a national criminal, or idolize anyone at all for that matter, and aspire to be like someone so harmful when I can recognize my own talent and build from there" it's probably more like, "you (the wizard) permanently got rid of a brilliant mind, an innocent person who just made a few mistakes, and someone who believed in me no matter what just so that you could be the better than me and loved by everyone else" and that's! very sad actually!
#this is all speculation btw idk if any of this is canon. how duncan feels about all this#i know i keep saying the exact same shit over and over but.... really not a fan of how the game handled duncan! sorry!#i know wizard101 isnt supposed to be about every single character gets a satisfying ending to their arc-#-meaning not everyone in the story will face consequences and/or find a happy ending and like thats fine they dont need to#but idkkkk its just imo really sad how essentially a kid suffers frrom something he cant control by himself (his ego)-#and then instead of getting help he is instead ignored (ambrose) and then manipulated and brought up by a cult#and then when it becomes super apparent how... TERRIBLE his life really is and we defeat him he just... goes back??????#we.... we LET him go back???? i mean we're not responsible for other people's bad decisions or mental health but bro....#and then when we tell ambrose he's just like “oh. too bad. well anyways-” AND IM LIKE WELL THATS THE REASON!!!!! NO WONDER HE'S FUCKED UP#NONE OF THIS IS ADDRESSED. NONE OF IT. WE KICK DUNCAN'S ASS AND THEN HE.... GOES BACK TO THE CABAL#i literally just got so desolate when (wallaru spoilers) because. okay. all that for nothing i guess#this isnt me being mad btw LMAO i know the tone probably reads as angry but im not im just disappointed#and tired. what is it with wizard101 in particular and just people suffering with no end. (me as i make my main suffer with no end)#but anyways yeah duncan has been in my head for a while. he's one of the guys that i love a lot BDKSNSKAJ#he's like a son to me and HE NEEDS A HEALTHY PARENT. HE NEEDS IT#not excusing his actions btw. he still committed crimes JRKDJSIEJ#i just have a soft spot for those villains in media who are doomed from the start yknow. (stares tearfully at morganthe and gf spider)#wizard101#wiz101#w101#text posts#duncan grimwater#im not normal about duncan at all he's probably the wozard oc i feel for the most other than malorn and us
26 notes
·
View notes
Text
god i fucking hate my dad
#he came home today from a bike trip he went on and he's been arguing with me about honeybee the whole fucking day#he keeps saying just let her out let her run around! every time i put her in her pen to nap#and he refuses to stop her from biting him#and he got mad at her for playing with his socks when she'd just been playing with mine and he threw them on the floor of the living room#which first of all stop being such a fucking slob#and second of all what the fuck did you expect to happen? it's a soft new toy on the floor where she spends most of her time. where all her#toys are. very similar to the two soft items she's allowed to play with (my socks)#she's fucking 3 months old she doesn't understand the difference between my socks and his socks#and i keep telling him i know what im doing i was doing all the research while he went to buttfuck nowhere on his midlife crisis motorcycle#but he just wont fucking listen to me#and hes like oh youre at that age where you think youre right about everything and are so stubborn like fuck you actually#first of all im stubborn about this because its a living breathing puppy and his actions will affect her behaviour as an adult#and bc i know what im fucking doing. ive been an animal person my entire life. i did all the research. i did this exact same thing with#parrots for five years.#and hes like you cant just put her in her pen every time shes being a dog like no i fucking dont. i only put her in her pen when it's time#for a nap and she's getting overtired. you can't just let her run around until she collapses bc for one she never fucking will#second that's only going to make her energy threshold higher and then she'll be absolutely impossible to handle#and i told him that and that i read that on like every professional dog training source i read#and he said that might be true or might not be#like it fucking is bitch omfg#and then he tried to one up me like um i actually raised you guys for a long time i know what im doing#like a child is not a fucking dog. also my mom raised us lets be fucking serious. and look how well adjusted i turned out#and he told me to relax and calm down like i wasnt even arguing with him but i sure as hell will now#like dont tell me to fucking relax. when has telling anyone to relax ever made anything better. especially a teenager. especially a (for#simplicity's sake) woman.#and i told him dont tell me to relax and he got all pissy and stormed off#like literally fuck you#im my fathers daughter. im just as stubborn as he is.#rambles
12 notes
·
View notes
Text
how many times do we need to learn as people that irony and hyperbole can be harmful because 'jokes' aren't easily distinguished from genuine thoughts and feelings until we stop rewarding people for speaking or posting about violence
like even if you're joking/don't actually believe that/think whoever you are insulting is bad/immoral/fictional therefore deserves it - ad hominem attacks always do more harm to the people who share those characteristic then the individual you intend to cause harm to or discredit
#discourse#long post#its genuinely erased so much of my enjoyment of 911blr knowing i have to check accounts or risk seeing bullying/hate#l like its an odd feeling to know that so many people in the same fandom as you actively hold hate or find hate funny against your communit#like tired of people saying others are too sensitive because we dont want to hear or see a person say they want to hurt themself or others#like sorry i put in the work everyday to not let my mental health backslide and to enjoying being alive and accept my queerness#while others seemingly have not#and i know the content i post/share is not all in the same circles as that certain blog and i hate that it still grinds my gears but#its so frustrating to see the cruel glee people have#saying things they would never say to anyone's face irl and only to other blindly devoted/similar bullies#like do these people realise that they are on a razor's edge between 'ironic jokes' and just outright bigotry and threats - like do they#literally the only thing seperating That and conservative bigots is that the bigots are honest about their hatred towards minorities#like a lot of people in the fandom seemingly still need to deal with a lot of intenalised homophobia/racism and just outright hate-#especially regarding queer men and men of colour#because i can not be emphasise enough#It is NOT GOOD OR HEALTHY to be a fully grown adult that actively derives joy from the idea of enacting hate crimes#like you can hate tommy you can want him off the show even want him to die like weird but go off#but its such a next step to unprompted talk about [a character i dislike/hate/dont ship/disrupts my fanon endgame] in derogatory ways -#with rhetoric that straight up is out of terf/rel. right/homophobic/racists bigots and evokes violent hate-crimes......#well i feel sorry for those people cause what a miserable life to spend so much of it unable to enjoy your own life that you target others#anyways I know this is too long but I'm just a very tired man who has studied history and education and working with kids i have seen it -#too many times- harmful words coming from harmful environments or creating harmful actions and thereby perpetuating the cycle of violence#also not super relavent but as Latino Australian i am genuinely appauled at how many people have in their bio they are also Australian-#while actively liking/reblogging and engaging with post that find homophobic violence a funny haha joke - as if activist in our country -#aren't actively trying to dismantle homophobic and transphobic laws regarding issues like conversion therapy#like I know professors that actively got fired for being gay while teaching in religious education context - and its still happening!#so for people to forget so quickly what progress has been made and how much it took and how easy it is to loose - disappointing#(and its the same people who wanna pretend mardi gras is nothing but a party as if 78rs didn't risk their jobs/safety/lives)
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
I think the reason I like the 5 Eccentrics so much is that it's just such a good depiction of the….variety of friendship. Because it was a group literally created to be destroyed. It was, in other words, a forced union of 5 people who might have never or barely interacted. Yet even with that, even knowing that, they all chose to have a meaningful friendship with each other - they chose to be friends and remain friends even if their union was forced, even if the very reason that they met was to be taken down. It's almost the arranged marriage trope but it wouldn't work as well like marriage because it really isn't that. It's like the family system (brought together by chance and a common identity) but it's still different. Because they didn't HAVE to be friends even if sharing the same label, because they didn't have to keep sticking around each other and become a real family. They chose to be friends in spite of all odds, chose to be grateful even amidst their destruction, and forged a precious bond that not even their predetermined fall could break and in this essay I will -
#fandom spamdom#enstars#ensemble stars#stuff i say#welcome to the inevitable five eccentrics post that i finally made you may move along now#BUT NO FOR REAL YOU GUYS IM SO OUGH OVER THE FRIENDSHIPS IN ENSTARS#for all the crazy that goes on in the story the friendships and the brotherhood (or siblinghood in some cases) is just so -#i dont even know the characters that well but i could go on forever about the amagis or sakumas or aoi twins#and maybe add a dash of the tsukasa-oukawa cousinhood while we're at it#and thats not even mentioning himeru and his brother#but the eccentrics have had me in a chokehold ever since the anime and the element miniseries and they havent let me go#its about connections that were forced but bonds that were forged instead#its about being thrust into the fire together and deciding to be the cooling water for each other instead of keeping a distance from them#its about friendship and family and realising theyre human because they found people like their own selves#and it messes me up how they also found people to establish their humanity with asides from each other#idk how to explain it because they always talk about how they werent very human before while im shaking them....#...because you guys WERE human. you ARE human. you have always been human but never treated as such...#....andfjaisojr eifowjifjsof eive lost coherence#i swear enstars hasnt made me go on about the human condition and the philosophy of humanity#i was already like this before the game#also i just find it so fascinating how the stories establish each of the idol boys' humanity....#....but at the same time the art and the very nature of the industry theyre participating in also kind of forces them to keep it under wrap#(like come on. even the name idols is so compelling...things made by man but revered as gods and potentially more fallible than man etc)#anyway disclaimer that these are all my opinions etc..
25 notes
·
View notes