#well that would be because i still have a grudge from 2.0

[kakavashazz]

Here's my screenshot collection from the new 2.3 quest(s)!

firstly, Aventurine helping Boothill hunt down the piece of shit that was responsible for wiping out Boothill's entire planet, as well as allowing the Katicans to wipe out Avgins entirely, is all i could ever want.

Yo...

this exchange in it's entirety LMAOOO

if you know me, you know i'm not Jade's biggest fan. however, i will take any excuse to get a screenshot of Aven.

Anyway! Here is the final page of the Penacony journal. Had to put my favorites front and center. (I'm a HI3 player so I can't be expected not to adore Acheron with all my heart).

I have about 1000 more screenshots but I wouldn't do that to you all. I also missed the couple frames Aven was on screen during the cutscene because I didn't expect him to be there and was caught slacking. I will miss the Penacony arc very much, but as long as I am fed a steady diet of Aventurine content, I will survive.

[mxtxfanatic]

I’ve been stuck in 2ha fics for a minute and have seen a few metas and posts surrounding Mo Ran’s character, but something I don’t think comes across very well from the book to fanwork and (some) discussion is that Taxian-jun doesn’t exist without the long-hatred flower.

Like, I see a lot of modern au fics, for example, that tackle the Mo Ran 1.0 to 1.5 shift by having Mo Ran be disillusioned by Chu Wanning and that being his villain origin story, but what gets lost in that remix is that in canon, while Mo Ran was hurt by being whipped by his shizun, after he thought about it for a while, he decided to apologize to Chu Wanning to reconcile rather than hold a grudge. Because Mo Ran, at his core, is someone who is naturally good and would rather die than enact vengeance on others. That’s why both the timing and the effects of the flower are particularly evil: Mo Ran is cursed because he chose reconciliation over petty grudges and the curse forces him to go against his nature by holding onto said petty grudges to “repay” them to a ridiculous degree while erasing any good memory he has, which is what had previously fueled his will to live.

With that said, Mo Ran 1.0/Taxian-jun is able to transition to 1.5 and eventually 2.0 not because he realized that Chu Wanning loved him all along (as a disciple at this point), but because the Chu Wanning from the original universe nullified the effects of the flower, allowing him to finally see that Chu Wanning loved him all along and that he actually doesn’t want revenge. And we can see that effect of the nullification immediately! Taxian-jun becomes 16-year-old Mo Ran, finds out that Shi Mei, his “first love” is actually still alive at this point, and immediately decides to prioritize keeping Shi Mei alive over enacting revenge on Chu Wanning. Because at his core he’s motivated by love! And when Hua Binan brings Taxian-jun’s reanimated corpse into the new universe, his control is tenuous because Taxian-jun isn’t being motivated purely by spite anymore because the flower isn’t in effect anymore. This isn’t to say that Mo Ran was incapable of becoming Taxian-jun, but as the narrative proves, that is a version of him that only exists under mind-breaking abuse and duress, which only happened when he lived under the Mo family’s reign of abuse for years before finally snapping and then once again under the effects of a curse that rewrote his memories to convince him that he was living under mind-breaking abuse and duress. Without those conditions, Mo Ran always chooses hope and love, and even as he looks back on those moments where he reigned terror, he wishes he could have chosen/been afforded death instead (much to Chu Wanning’s upset). So all this to say that Mo Ran isn’t saved by realizing he was living under a misunderstanding; he is saved by having the thing leeching out all of the good in him destroyed.

(Also on a smaller note, Taxian-jun isn’t uneducated because he was on the street for so long and therefore “too old” to be properly educated. Taxian-jun is uneducated because all of his memories of learning were good memories tied to Chu Wanning, thus they got erased. Mo Ran 2.0 re-educates himself in his late teens/early 20s because the problem was always the flower, not some “inherent” inferiority he was stuck with from his upbringing or an unwillingness to learn.)

[professional-demon-master]

Cutting you off pt3

Leviathan

Light angst/ fluff. Good ending !! GN reader

I had to change colors to avoid confusion lol

Levi was a jealous person. It didn’t took you long to notice that. I mean, he was literally envy incarnated and he did showed that pretty well.

Despite of that and the disastrous way you guys met, you did ended up having a good relationship with him. There were anime nights every week and at least one day you would dedicate to gaming with him.

At least there were when he actually approved your presence in his room

And it wasn’t even the fact that you were human, but he still hold a grudge at you for being a normie.

*And don’t get him wrong, he knows you watch animes and have enjoyed a manga or two and let’s not talk about you video games experience, but you’re still too normie for him.

And that’s way most of the time when you asked him to do anything together, he would take a long time before accepting, because he just couldn’t believe a normies like you would want to do activities with him.

Please! A normie like you asking him to see a new anime together? You’re probably joking.

You? Asking him how Henry 2.0 was doing? You were probably doing it to make fun of him!

But you still found patience to actually convince him that you just wanted to spend time with him and that it wasn’t a tactic to mock him later

Up until one disastrous day where everything went wrong

You couldn’t concentrate in class, you had a pop quiz and you had a ton of homework.

You were just praying for the day to be over so you could finally relax and spend time with Levi like you had planned two days ago, the new season of an anime you both liked was airing that day, and you were going to celebrate it by spending the day together.

After leaving school, you practically ran all the way from RAD to HoL, only stopping once you were in front of Levi's door answering his password to get there and finally relax.

“Hey Levi! Where were you after class? I had to drag Mammon all the way home because I couldn’t find you.”

He didn’t actually answered, but since he was looking at cd's you supposed he was too concentrated to actually answer you.

“You choosing what to watch? That’s wise, the new chapter won’t drop for another three hours”

…

“Levi?¨ Still nothing.

“You can just drop it, you know?”

“What?”

“I-I said you can drop it! The act!”

It was your time to be in silence. He turned around to look at you.

“Don’t act dumb! You know what I’m talking about!”

“I really don’t Levi. Please explain it to me”

He inhaled a little bit frustrated. “The act where you come in here pretending to be interested in my and my hobbies, wanting to watch an anime with me that you probably don’t even like!”

“Oh my… really? This again? It’s getting ridiculous, Levi.”

Levi dropped the cd's in his hands, position both arms at his side while walking towards you.

“You’re the one who’s acting ridiculous! Why pretend you like me?”

“I’m not pretending! I thought by now you would’ve realized I like spending time with you.” You explained, a little bit desperate this time.

“I know your type M-MC! Just pretending you’re interested, but you’re just passing the time cause I’m the only one who’s available right now!”

“Levi, what the fuck?” You frowned while painting your gaze locked with his. “I think I better leave”

“Yeah, there’s probably another demon you can throw yourself at by now”

You bit your tong to avoid answering. Levi often got into these moods and arguing with him was like yelling at a wall.

“You know what? Forget it, think whatever you want to think.” You opened the door and muttered an “asshole” before closing it behind you.

Levi knew it, he knew he was acting like an asshole and that it technically wasn’t your fault, but he had spent the whole day at RAD watching you pass the time with everybody else. Reading at the library with Satan, eating lunch with the twins, passing notes with Mammon during class and even walking through the halls with the angels. And please don’t even get him started on how you hugged Solomon during the morning after he gave you human realm chocolate he had retrieved for you!

Even though he knew he was in the wrong he couldn’t stop himself from thinking that MC was going to come to him and apologize at any moment. That’s how it worked before and he was almost sure that’s the way it was going to work now too.

Still, as time went by he was getting worried he had now scared you off for good.

It’s not like it was just an idea in his head, you were actively avoiding him now.

You stayed behind to watch Beer practice instead of meeting him after school to watch anime together, you had ramen dates with Mammon and even started watching movies with Satan! He didn’t bothered to pretend he thought they were lame normie movies, he still wanted you to watch them with him!

His breaking point came when he heard you laughing while playing video games with mammon and beel in the living room.

¨That’s enough! Stop it!¨ he sprinted to unplug the console before any of his brothers could stop him. Everyone stopped abruptly, not even having time to complain before Leviathan started yelling again. ¨I knew it wasn’t gonna be hard for you to replace me but this is enough!¨

You just watched him a little bit concerned, the brothers looked at each other a little bit confused by the sudden appearance of Levi’s temper tantrum and apparently not realizing it was directed to you.

“Man I swear Levi keeps gettin’ weirder by the day” Mammon whispered and frowned while he sunk by your side.

That same night, when you were in your room getting ready for bed you heard three little knocks in your door. You were pretty sure it had to be Mammon who was probably coming to spend time with you before falling asleep, a little ¨Come in¨ escaped your mouth almost in automatic.

“Hi” you lifted your head and observed Levi there, opening the door just enough so you could see his face. You kept quiet, and Leviathan took that as a sign to continue talking before his little window of bravery closed. “I-I wanted to say I’m sorry. About the game… and yelling at you… and, well, e-everything.”

You stood up from your seat at your bed and went started walking to the door without taking your eyes from him. Levi felt nervous and started playing with your doorknob while his gaze looked down.

“I-I know it was wrong, but I guess I was just… jealous. N-Not that it’s an excuse! I know you were just being your usual normie charming self. Just… sometimes it’s hard seeing you being so close with everybody, b-because I know they’re cooler than me, and that after spending enough time with them you’ll stop coming. Nobody would want to spend time with a yucky- eek!”

You interrupted him with a hug that caught him off guard. “Shut up”, you fix your posture so you could look at him without breaking the hug. “Levi I love spending time with you, and nothing will change that. C’mon, you know it.”

“B-But… I mean, you spent this last days just with my brothers and you looked just fine.” Levi spoke through scarlet cheeks and a little stutter. You gave him a sad smile.

“I mean… yeah, but they were just helping me pass the time. Don’t get me wrong I love them, but it just felt weird not spending every free time I had with you. They tried to help me take my mind off of our argument but it just wasn’t the same.” You finally broke the hug and looked at him while you tilted your head. “I missed you, Levi, but this can’t happen again, next time you’re feeling like this please just talk to me.”

“I’ll try to be better, I promise” You nodded and walked inside your room again. Levi stood there, a little awkward and unsure of what to do.

“Aren’t you coming in? We have a lot of catching up to do on a lot of Animes”

His face lightened up while he run to your bed. You were right, how could he doubt you?

Omg I’m so sorry It took me so long to finally post but work is literally killing me. Why can’t they just leave me be the silly little sheep writer I am 😩

Hope you like it guys! -B

[empressgeekt]

Your caught in the grey AU reminds me of an AU I had been trying to work on but never posted! It’s a ‘what if Poppy was with Viva?’ AU! The trauma of losing both daughters more or less makes Peppy snap and the village is discovered on the 15th anniversary.

Branch still has a rough childhood, rougher without Poppy but also somewhat less due to the fact there’s less attention on him with her constant prodding. In the end, despite Branch’s grudges with the village he doesn’t want any innocent kids suffering from their parents mistakes and doesn’t value himself enough to care that taking the Chef on is a fools mission.

Despite this, when Peppy sees Branch willing to fight for a village that hasn’t treated him right it gives him a moment of clarity and he uses that opportunity to sacrifice his own life instead to take down the Chef using the pop string as a final weapon.

When this happens there’s a large debate on whether or not Branch should be King. Branch definitely does not want the title but is also worried that if he lets someone else do it things will go back to the way they were.

In the end he decides to become king to the villagers who agree to his rules, and those who don’t are more than welcome to fend for themselves. (Many begrudgingly are forced to accept after they find out how dangerous the forest is outside the village.)

While Branch does his best to lead the very traumatised remaining village to a new location he’s struggling to try and support them given the fact it’s been a while since he’s been around others but that’s where the snack pack steps in.

Some of them had parents that were against King Peppy and understood that his methods weren’t healthy, even those that didn’t were shook by the Chef’s attack. Especially considering a handful of them almost got caught.

Although Creek and Branch had very clashing ideologies in the past, the loss of his parents and having to endure the wilderness outside has helped change his perspective. When he first rejoins Branch doesn’t trust him to take his authority seriously at all but they end up developing a balance with each other as the new village is set up.

Five years go by and we see on a different part of the map Poppy and Viva clashing heads. The putt putt trolls recently suffered a loss of crops and while Poppy wants to try and find resources outside the wall Viva refuses to let her go. Clay gets caught in the middle, understanding Viva’s perspective because he knows how scared she is and understanding Poppy’s because of his relationship to JD. (Lots of self reflection there)

Poppy does eventually manage to sneak out, all she wanted to do was collect some seeds or look for edible plants but she gets snatched by a bird. She eventually frees herself but is now lost deep in a dark forest with no clue how to get home.

Meanwhile the village 2.0 is somewhat thriving. The anniversary is now treated a lot more solemnly but they still have some celebrations, only this time to remember the deceased and the consequences of denial. Branch still doesn’t handle parties well and chooses to go on patrol that day. While out in the forest he’s surprised to find a bright pink troll, especially one he doesn’t remember seeing before.

Oh....this is interesting. Feels very in character a well. Branch being passive, yet protective. Poppy being stubborn by caring....it also made me think about what would happen if Puttputt Poppy met Char??? Humm....

[lucy-moderatz]

Do you think there’s a big or little difference between Carrie and Aidan’s first and second breakup?

I think that Carrie and Aidan 1.0 vs. Carrie and Aidan 2.0 shared some important and noticeable distinctions. Season three almost beats us over the head with Aidan's goodness. He's the perfect boyfriend. He's attentive, honest, kind, humble. He's everything Carrie has said she wanted. And, well, Carrie does what she does. Their first break up, while painful, is pretty clear cut in my opinion. She cheated. He broke up with her.

But this all informs who they are when they get back together. Aidan takes time to let Carrie back in. He's far from the perfect guy he was before. His flirtations with the waitress from Steve's bar were over the line. He says he's over what she did, but when she's back in his life, he keeps her at a distance and still feels the need to punish her after Big calls. Do I get it? Yeah. Is it shitty? Yeah. Aidan is no longer the "perfect boyfriend". He is a guy. A guy with flaws and problems and grudges. He's allowed to come into focus in season four in a way that he was not in season three.

And with his flaws come their personality differences. We're told early in the season that they aren't compatible. And, honestly, they aren't. Their priorities are different. Their visions for their futures are different. Aidan keeps getting more settled down and Carrie keeps being, well, Carrie. She hates being tied down. But, because of how she's treated him, because of the fact that they love each other, we as the audience are supposed to ignore those things and just focus on the idea of Carrie finally choosing Aidan. Which leads us to break up number two.

Carrie's first impulse, when seeing the ring, was the throw up. To throw up, to say no, to run away like her hair was on fire. This has nothing to do with Aidan. I fully believe, if he had never proposed, they would have stayed together. But we come, yet again, to the problem of Big. Carrie tells Aidan in the first episode they are officially back together that Big is going to be part of her life. She then tells Big if he isn't able to at least be civil with Aidan, she won't be able to stay in his life. Aidan does not, presumably, know that. So when Big barges in and makes and ass of himself, Aidan proposes not two episodes later. As he says in their fight at the fountain, he needed to be chosen. He needed a definitive commitment from her that he was the one. That he always would be. I don't think it was okay of him to pressure her the way he did, but I understand why he needed it. Aidan was ready to get married, I fully believe that. He was ready to settle down, start a family, all of that (which he did, less than a year after he and Carrie broke up). Carrie wasn't. And I think a part of him knew that. I think he was ignoring it, the same way Carrie was.

So, back to your question. I think that their first break up was much more emotionally clean cut. Her cheating caused it. But with their second one, there was a lot more going on, and it was much more about them not fitting together as people at that point in their lives. Some of the same elements were involved (i.e. Big) but the second time around, I really feel like it was just about the timing.

[hulijingemperor2]

Rusong's birthday 🎂 part 2~~

~~~~

Pine Pavillion📍

Jinling, Song'er and friends had just finished eating their bellies full.

Jingyi: c...can someone die from a food coma? If I die, I want Jinling ti read my eulogy.

Jingyi: no way! Behave!

Sizhui: I'm not sure that's possible, Jingyi.

Rusong: heehee, don't be so dramatic. *burps softly*

Jinling: he's always overreacting.

Jingyi: I think I'm under reacting.

Jinling: is under reacting even a word.

Jingyi: yea! Under and reacting are two words. So two words will make one word. That's reproduction, Jinling.

Rusong: oh my.

Jinling: Song'er Goodluck with him. If Xiao shushu adopts him.

Rusong: I will have a ball.

Jingyi: and I'll have mantous. Maybe a little wine!

Ouyang Zizhen: *plunging jnto the pool* Rusong! You're living the life. You got an indoor pool.

Rusong: yup. And a personal hot spring.

Jingyi: *sobs* I want to be a prince so badddd.

Ouyang Zizhen: same! All I have to deal with is a cranky dad. He's obsessed with me becoming sect leader.

Rusong: do you want to?

Ouyang Zizhen: yea of course!! But A-Die is just cranking my style. I want to be free!!

Jingyi: Master Qiren is worst than your cranky dad. Rusong, I don't need a sugar daddy. I need a sugar emperor.

Sizhui: oh my goodness.

Jinling: stop being gross. And do you know what that mean.

Ouyang Zizhen: a sugar~~

Jinling: don't tell him.

Jinling: I'm also a Dianxia but I want to be a sect leader like Jiujiu!

Jingyi: all hail sect leader princess.

Jinling: *rolls eyes*

Sizhui: you'll be a cute sect leader Jin.

Rusong: definitely.

Ouyang Zizhen: I know that Rusong is going to rule the world, Jianghu and The fox spiri empire. With those dimples, looks, sharp tongue and intellect. He'll have the Jianghu crawling.

Do you see how powerful his A-Die is!

Jingyi: the guy (Yao Huangdi) almost fried guangshan with hot guqin strings.

Rusong: it was a little sizzle. Not much.

What's your future, Sizhui?

Sizhui: well I'm hoping to find the Wen remnants with uncle Ning. Maybe I can start a reformed Wen sect. But in the Lan clan, I don't know if I may be the sect leader some day. Well, if it's in my fate, I accept.

Rusong: aww lovely!

Ouyang Zizhen: Lan Qiren is basically immortal now lol! He's not giving up for anyone.

Jingyi: woww. Sizhui you're gonna bring back the WENS?!! You're revolutionary!

Sizhui: mhm. But they're going to be good. Also they'll be more like auntie Qing.

Helping, cultivating and treating people.

Wei qianbe said that auntie Qing was a doctor, so she refused to fight with the Wens.

Jingyi: girlboss.

Ouyang Zizhen: I agree.

Jinling: I wish you the best.

Sizhui: thanks.

Jingyi: you, Jinling and Rusong have some powerful uncles.

Ouyang Zizhen: I know right.

Rusong: heehee, it's indeed a random blessing.

Jinling: yea. Got to love those random uncles.

Sizhui: if someone lay a finger on me, my ghost general uncle can rip them to shreds. Just saying.

Jingyi: *astonished* bro.

Jingyi: when Rusong become Huangdi, you become sect leader Wen/Lan, you become sect leader Ouyang and sect leader Jin, I'm gonna drink and party so much for you guys!

Here I'm planning to be Hanguang Jun 2.0. I want to reach the perfection that IS Hanguang Jun.

Rusong: good luck. *smile* I'm sure you'll meet the perfection of your idol.

I still have a grudge though.

Jingyi: whyyy?!! Sorry I forgot. When I think about food, I forget everything else.

Rusong: he attacked my A-Die and insulted my uncle Su.

A-Die and I had to remind him everyday that he's valued.

Sizhui: awww.

Jingyi: I hear you man. Anyways I can't argue with you. Cuz you're hot. I mean because you're my bro!

Ouyang Zizhen: *wiping his wet hair* yea Rusong is kinda hot. *coughs*

Rusong: exactly. And you would lose an argument with me.

Jingyi: I admit.

It's the dimples.

Ouyang Zizhen: always. And that way of speech.

Rusong: I didn't ask A-Die to give me those qualities ok!

Ouyang Zizhen: other than dimples, you're still good-looking.

Jinling: Rusong is a chick magnet.

Rusong: not true.

Jingyi: no wonder ouyang zizhen is  single. Rusong keeps taking away the ladies.

Ouyang Zizhen: Dianxia!! That isn't cool.

Rusong: Zizhen, you'll find a girl who likes you, don't worry.

Do you want me to link you with some fox spirits?

Ouyang zizhen: yes yes yes! I do!!!

Rusong: rich? Educated? Uneducated? Performer? Teacher? Who do you want.

Ouyang Zizhen: any one. Once she's pretty and around my age.

Rusong: ok then. I'll sunmon two.

Ouyang Zizhen: you can summon hulijings???!!

Rusong: uh...duh.

Jinling: of course he can, idiot. only imperial hulijings can summon them.

Rusong: but you got to do something for me in return.

Ouyang zizhen: what's that?!!

Rusong: in the future, you and your sect got to assist the Huyao empire.

Ouyang Zizhen: of course. And we're already besties.

Rusong: glad doing business with you.

Jingyi: Rusong knows politics, lol.

Jinling: he's Xiao shushu's son after all.

Xiao shushu has all the sect leaders in a chokehold.

Rusong: and one thing. *gives him a talisman pendant* keep this with you.

So that your energy won't be sucked out.

Ouyang Zizhen: thanks!

You're so cool, Rusong.

Rusong: also they won't misbehave with you because it got the Dianxia ceal

Jingyi: wow

Sizhui: aww, Wangzi privileges.

Ouyang Zizhen: this guy is top tier.

Do your A-Die have that?!

Rusong: yea yea. He does.

His ceal is the highest there is.

Jinling: obviously Zizhen!

Afterwards, two fox spirits appeared and bowed to Rusong.

Greetings Dianxia.

Rusong: rise please. Huifen, Li mei.

Yes Dianxia.

Li mei: happy birthday, Dianxia.

Huifen: sorry, we haven't brought any gifts for you.

Ouyang Zizhen: *sobs* they're flirting with Rusong.

Jinling: no they're not!

Jingyi: you're screwed, dude.

Rusong: thank you for the wishes. And it's ok if you didn't bring gifts.

My friend Ouyang Zizhen, the soon to be sect leader wants to have a few friends, hence I called you guys here.

Huifen: sure. As you wish.

We'll keep him company.

Li mei: he's really really cute after all.

Ouyang Zizhen: *blushing*

Li mei: but not as cute as our Dianxia.

Rusong: *laughing* you guys.

Jingyi: lol.

Sizhui: go talk to them, Zizhen.

Ouyang Zizhen: but they're too pretty.

Sizhui: you got this. And they said you're cute.

Rusong: *sits and pours himself some wine* ahh, what an amazing birthday.

Ouyang Zizhen: so! *wraps his arms around the two hulijings* where are you guys from?!

Huifen: Nanjing.

Li mei: Luoyang. But my family lives in Yunping.

Ouyang: ohh. Have you guys been to Bailing? That's where I'm from. *wink*

Both: no. *giggling*

Ouyang zizhen: so are you guys rich? Not that it matters.

Li mei: my dad is the minister of revenue.

Huifen: I'm a dancer.

Ouyang zizhen: aww!! So you're the talented one, Fenfen.

Li mei: hey, don't say that. I'm talented too. Not only my cousin.

Ouyang zizhen: wow you guys are cousins?

What do you do, mei?

Li mei: I can do embroidery. And I own an embroidery shop.

Ouyang zizhen: beautiful.

I'm going to be sect leader soon!

Li mei: ahh, that's great. Do you want some fox spirit help?

We're very benevolent.

Huifen: we become servants, and help your business prosper.

But then if you misuse your power, then that's when the chaos begins.

Li mei: we love scholars, merchants and powerful people. But we love to tease the rotten ones.

Ouyang zizhen: that's kinda hot of you two.

Both: *blushing*

Ouyang zizhen: nah, I don't want you guys as fox spirit servants. I want you as my girlfriends. My Ouyang Furen.

Huifen: omg! Ouyang Gongzi. Stop it.

Li mei: heeehee. We'll be anything you want.

Jingyi: he got them.

Jinling: huh, surprising. I hope they don't break up with them.

Jingyi: or the other way around.

Rusong: but they're really cute together.

I ship them.

Jinling: are they pretending just because it's your order?

Rusong: nah. If they didn't like him, they would have just told me and I would give them permission to go back home.

Jingyi: *Eating again* man I'm hungry again.

Huifen and Li mei: *hugging ouyang zizhen*

Ouyang zizhen: *awestruck* you two smell nice.

Li mei: thank you!!

Huifen: I feel like I can feast on your energy but you got the Dianxia ceal on you.

Ouyang zizhen: yea. I'm friends with your Dianxia.

Huifen: waw.

Li mei: what did you get him for his birthday?

Ouyang zizhen: uhhh......*blushing*

Rusong: guys, he got me a ceramic ornament. Don't worry.

Both: *cheering* Ouyang gongzi is so rich and generous!!

Ouyang zizhen: (thanks for helping me Rusong. Im nervous around them)

If I marry you two, would you suck out my energy?

Li mei: no darling.

Huifen: we love you too much to do that.

Ouyang zizhen: *laughing* right!

Huifen: here's some liquor, Gongzi.

Ouyang zizhen: thank you very much! Now tell me, what gifts do you like?

Huifen: anything pretty.

Li mei: anything I can put in my hair.

Ouyang zizhen: awww.

Another fox spirit girl appeared, and went to Rusong's side.

Dianxia!!

Rusong: hi, Biyu.

Biyu: *bows* happy birthday, Dianxia.

Rusong: thank you. Have a seat.

Biyu: *sits next to him*

Jingyi: you got one for you too?!!

Rusong: yea.

Do you guys want a fox spirit?

Jingyi: *blushing* NO!

Sizhui: I'm good, Rusong.

Jinling: Jiujiu might scold me.

Rusong: ok.

Biyu, what would you like? Tea or wine?

Biyu: wine, Dianxia. If I said tea, then you would have to make it. And I can't put my Dianxia through that.

Rusong: so be it. *pours some wine* here you go.

Biyu: a toast to you.

Rusong: *smile*

You're too kind.

Biyu: *hugs hand* hulijing Dianxia, anything you need? You're the boss.

Rusong: nothing, thank you.

Anyways, here's a jade hairpin, and $400. *wink*

Biyu: awwww thanks for the gifts! But I'm the one who's supposed to get you something.

Rusong: haha, there's no need.

Biyu: *blushing* you're really kind and sweet.

*kneels*

Dianxia, if you say, I shall leave.

Rusong: go ahead. *smile*.

Biyu: bye Dianxia. *disappears*

Jinling: Rusong! Is that your gf?!

Rusong: no. Our citizens are just fond of admiring A-Die and I, and we love to treat them in return.

Jinling: ohh.

Rusong: enough about me. Guys, how about we go to the in-house sushi eatery.

Ouyang zizhen: *hugging his girlfriends* I'm right there, Dianxia.

Fenfen, I have a rich friend.

Jinling: yea I can do with some sushi.

Jingyi: an in-house sushi place, in your house?! What else do you have in here?

Jinling: non of your business.

Jingyi: I'll make it my business, JINLING!

Rusong: lol, don't worry about that.

~

On the other side, in Jing Manor.

Zixuan: A-Yao, do you ever feel to do something crazy. Out of our comfort zone.

Yao: sometimes. 

Zixuan: what if we spend the night in a cottage in the middle of the woods.

Yao: Zixuan. *touches Zixuan's forehead* are you ok?

Zixuan: come on! It will be fun!

Yao: i know it would, but you and woods don't go together, lol.

Zixuan: it's for the experience. We'll know to fetch water and deal with the heat.

Yao: and cook our own meals!

Zixuan: right!

Yao: should we bring our personal assistants?

Zixuan: of course, Yaoyao. We're emperors, we'll die without our servants.

Yao: *shakes head* oh Zixuan.

But you're right.

[dreamwritesimagines]

Burn The Witch 23 - Haunted Heart [Bucky Barnes x Reader]

A.N: Thank you so much for your wonderful support and feedback my loves ! ❤ Here’s the next chapter, I hope you like it as well and please let me know what you think! ❤ Thank you! ❤❤❤

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Warnings: Enemies to lovers, lovers to enemies, fake dating, mentions of blood, sex, violence, death, manipulation, language, guns, knives.

Summary: Coming home can cause issues.

Series Masterlist

                          SIX MONTHS LATER

You flipped the knife in your hand as the guy tied to the chair glared at you.

“You know,” you trailed off, “I’ve had a really shitty couple of months, Johnny- can I call you Johnny?”

“No.”

“Rude,” you commented, “Fine. John. I’ve had a really shitty couple of months so you really don’t want to try me right now. Just tell me where I can find your boss.”

“You’ll never find him you stupid bitch.”

You rolled your eyes.

“Since I’m going to kill you in a couple of minutes I feel like I can share some things with you,” you said, “My best friend says I keep everything bottled and I should talk about my feelings.”

“Go fuck yourself.”

“See, that’s exactly how I feel!” you pointed at him, “Thank you. I mean, I feel angry at myself. I kind of fucked up with the man I love.”

“Jesus Christ, just kill me already.”

“I’m waiting for a text to do that Johnny,” you pointed out, waving your phone at him. “So, I tricked him and used him and threw him to wolves. And then Accords 2.0 didn’t pass and he has been pardoned once again, and he’s a free man now. I have a strong feeling that he’s not the ‘forgive and forget’ type of guy. You know, assassin to assassin.”

“You’re the chattiest assassin I’ve ever met.”

“Thank you, I’m trying to improve myself,” you said, “I mean what exactly should I do? I don’t even trust my agency at this point, my handler lied to me and I have been at this fucking place for six months now, hunting you down. Well, your boss but…”

“You’ll never find him.”

“We’ll see about that my friend,” you said, “So anyway, like what am I supposed to do? I lost the one guy I actually loved. How do you cope with that? Because drinking doesn’t work, sleeping with others doesn’t work…. Nothing seems to—“ you were cut off when your phone vibrated and you touched the screen to open the text message.

From: Julian

Go for it.

“Wait, no no no, I’ll talk—“

“Kind of too late,” you pointed the gun at him, “Nice to meet you Johnny.”

With that you pulled the trigger, silencer doing its job as there was no loud bang or anything. His body fell back with the impact, and you heaved a sigh.

“Maybe I need a therapist I can’t kill,” you mumbled and walked out of the warehouse to approach the car before opening the door to the passenger seat to get in.

“Is it done?” Julian asked and you nodded, rubbing at your eyes.

“Yep.”

“Are you hungry?”

You made a face, “Just because the General sent you here does not mean we’re going to become buddies.”

“I’m not trying to become buddies with you,” Julian stated, “I just want to eat fries and there’s a two for one deal.”

You eyed him up and down.

“Fine, I could eat fries.” You leaned back in the seat as he started driving, keeping your eyes on the road. Soon enough, you reached the city center and Julian got fries from a food truck, then sat across from you.

“So,” he said, “You do realize this whole thing would’ve been over by now if we actually worked together?”

“I’m not going on the field with you.”

“The General sent me here to help you.”

You dipped the fry into sauce, then popped it into your mouth, “You can help me by pretending you’re not here.”

“Y/N.”

“You know what they say Julian. Fool me once…”

“Don’t tell me you’re still holding that grudge.”

“You mean when you left me behind to die on the last mission we were together?” you asked back, “That grudge?”

“I told you—“

“I’m not going to talk about that with you,” you cut him off, “And I work better alone. Who told you we could waste the guy by the way?”

“The General.”

You grabbed the salt shaker to pour some salt on the fries, causing Julian to make a face.

“Are you kidding me? That was salty enough-“

“Why did he not text me?”

“No idea. Maybe he’s avoiding you because he promised you handler and here you are. Field spy.”

Your jaw clenched.

Or maybe he’s avoiding me because he fucking lied to me.

You had to give it to him, it was the perfect plan. The moment he had suspected you were getting too close to Bucky, he had come up with the one thing he knew that would make you switch sides.

And that-

That was below the belt yes, but that was also masterly.

But at the end of the day, you barely had two people to trust in the entire world, and you seriously doubted you could ever forgive the General for what he had done. You knew he held duty above all, above family and surely above you, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt.

You shook your head at yourself and grabbed another piece of fry.

“So um…” Julian shifted his weight, “Are you okay?”

You shot him a glare, arching a brow, “Peachy.”

“No I mean… About Barnes.”

“What are you talking about?”

“This whole Accords 2.0 failure, there’s no way we could go after him again.”

“I don’t want to go after him again.”

“You don’t want revenge?”

That made you straighten up your back and you put the fry down, “And why exactly would I want revenge?”

That made Julian fall silent and you nibbled on your lip.

“What exactly did the General tell you before you came here?”

“That there was a job here.”

“Bullshit,” you replied way too quickly, “Did he send you here to be my babysitter? He thinks I’ll go after Barnes myself is that it? That’s why they sent you here months after I left the country but right after Accords 2.0 didn’t pass.”

Julian licked his lips.

“Listen, the agency wants to keep you safe—“ he started but then his phone beeped. He grabbed it to take aa look at the screen, then cussed under his breath.

“What?”

“Check your texts.”

You touched the screen and frowned as your eyes skimmed the text.

From: General

Time to come home.

“Well,” you muttered, your heart dropping to your stomach, “Shit.”

                                                   ***

Coming back home was harder than ever now. After catching up with Keith and Chloe, you were taken to your new apartment that was given to you by the agency as usual, and for the whole night you couldn’t sleep.

Even if there was no trace of Bucky in your new apartment –in your new life, you still couldn’t shake off this feeling. It was as if the moment you had entered the country, Bucky had entered your life in an instant.

Odds were, you wouldn’t really see him again. After all it was a big city, and Bucky wasn’t exactly the social type.

So your first week back in New York wasn’t exactly terrible. You were still waiting for your orders while getting to know to the city slowly, because after long missions it always took time for you to remember you had a real life there, real memories—

Well, as real as it could be, for a spy.

“Just see it as a vacation,” Chloe had said, “They threw you into another mission as soon as you got out of the country, it’s just a delayed vacation.”

As far as vacations went though, this one just sucked.

Maybe it was because you couldn’t keep away from places you and Bucky had been too, like this coffee place where you had first officially met.

You sipped your coffee, scrolling down on the news website as your eyes skimmed yet another article about Accords and whether you could trust superheroes or not, but you were soon distracted when someone pulled the seat across from you, making you look up from your phone.

And as soon as you did, your heart dropped.

You had to give it to the General, he was manipulative, he was a liar and he had betrayed your trust terribly but the one thing he had done right was training you well. Aside from that one second, you managed to adapt a look of nonchalance on your face, slowly putting your phone down.

“Hello Cap.”

Sam raised his brows and eyed you up and down.

“You’re back?”

You could swear he could hear your heartbeat and you shrugged your shoulders, looking around.

“Yeah,” you said, “Big apple and everything.”

“So much for the small town girl.”

“I have never been a small town girl,” you drawled, “Never been to Oregon either.”

“Yeah, I can tell.”

You turned your coffee cup on the table just so you could do something with your hands.

“Why?” he asked after a beat and you shifted your weight despite your whole training of feeling calm and collected, nervousness hitting you out of nowhere.

“You’re a veteran, Wilson,” you managed to say, “You don’t need me to tell you how the chain of command works. Army doesn’t care how we feel about orders.”

“I’m very familiar with how chain of command works,” he pointed out, “But you’re not a soldier, Y/N. You’re a spy.”

“That makes it even worse,” you stated, “I know it sounds like an excuse, but… you don’t know how my agency works. I don’t get to say no to orders, and I sure as hell don’t get to blow my own cover.”

“But you wanted to, didn’t you?”

Jesus Christ, Wilson was really good at this observation thing.

“Doesn’t matter what I want,” you said, “I’m no use to anyone if I develop a conscience.”

“But you did,” he insisted, “Why else would you come to help us? Why else would you warn him beforehand?”

“He told you about that?”

He shot you a look, “What do you think, Y/N?”

You scoffed a laughter. “I was feeling generous,” you said, “No other reason.”

He kept his gaze on you for a couple of seconds, as if trying to see whether you would cave before he took a deep breath.

“You know he was going to propose, right?”

That-

That was just too much. You could feel your jaw hanging as you stared at him in complete silence, his words echoing in your ears.

“No,” you said after a moment, then shook your head fervently, your nose in the air, “No you’re wrong.”

“I’m not,” Sam said, “Apparently he was looking for this… house painted in white with—a red door or something.”

Don’t cry.

Do not fucking cry.

Spies don’t cry over heartbreak.

You clenched your jaw and blinked back the tears, straightening your back.

“It’s a good thing he didn’t get to, then.”

“Y/N, he loved you.”

“No Sam, he loved someone who doesn’t exist,” you replied, “Sweet small town girl with sundresses and smiles and some house in the suburbs with kids and all that shit. Girls like me don’t get that ending, I have way too much blood on my hands.”

He pressed his lips together and you cleared your throat.

“How much does he hate me?”

“Why do you think he hates you?”

“Assassins aren’t good at forgiving,” you said, “I would know, we don’t have that talent.”

“That’s not a talent, that’s a choice.”

“It really isn’t,” you muttered, “So?”

“Why don’t you ask him?”

You let out a bitter laugh, “Yeah no. Actions have consequences and I’d rather not cross paths with the deadliest assassin in the world after double crossing him.”

“But you want him to forgive you.”

“What makes you say that?”

“Intuition,” he said and pushed his chair back to stand up.

“He didn’t kill your father, Y/N.”

You heaved a sigh.

“I know,” you said, “Trust me, I would’ve walked away so much easier if he had.”

“Enjoy your coffee,” he said and walked out of the coffee house. You threw your head back, closing your eyes.

“Yep. I shouldn’t have come back.”

                                                  ***

“I never thought I’d say this, but I kind of hate that we’re not living so close anymore,” you pressed the phone between your shoulder and your ear and opened the door to your apartment as Keith chuckled.

“I knew you’d miss me.”

“Shut up.”

“You’re a softie deep inside. Very very deep inside.”

“If you repeat that in front of anyone I swear to God…” you muttered and he groaned.

“Have I told you they’re putting me in the same team as Julian?”

“You guys have a new mission?”

“Not a long one probably.”

“Why the fuck am I—“

“Because you’re on a vacation,” he cut you off, “And also they’re probably going to make you a handler, that’s worth waiting for.”

“That or….”

“We’re not talking about that on the phone,” Keith said quickly, “Amateur.”

“Careful there, I’ll outrank you soon enough,” you said, walking to the bathroom to wash your hands. “I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“Alright, see you later!” he said and hung up. You put your phone into your pocket, then washed your hands and made your way to the kitchen.

It was only when you put the wine bottle back into the fridge that you noticed something was off. Your body moved on its own accord, before you knew it you had already grabbed the knife in your boots and threw it to the figure in the dark corner of the room but he easily caught it, metal hitting what sounded like another kind of metal before he stepped out of the corner. Your breath caught in your throat, and for the first time in your life you froze, all the training leaving your mind.

You were supposed to be looking for a weapon, any kind of weapon but somehow, your body refused to move.

Bucky turned your knife in his hands, his gaze pinning you to your spot before he tilted his head.

“Hi honey,” he said, his voice way too cold. “I’m home.”

Chapter 24

[bigskydreaming]

Me vs DC writers’ never-ending need to draw from the well of characters telling Dick Grayson he’s acting just like Batman: READY, FIGHT!

No but seriously, is it any wonder this guy is so driven to get out from under Bruce’s shadow and be seen as his own person when he can’t even make his own mistakes? Every single mistake he makes is really just Batman’s mistake and makes Dick just like him.

Like, Bruce doesn’t have a monopoly on trust issues, or being closed off, or just having a bad day. Other characters exhibit behavior like this or resulting from this all the time, but every time Dick does it, a character is waiting in the wings to tell him how he’s turning into Batman. As though there’s no possibility he can be making a choice for reasons that have absolutely nothing to do with Bruce or being raised by Bruce.

Dick doesn’t reveal his identity to new members of the Titans? Its obviously because he doesn’t trust them and is just like Batman.....can’t possibly be because revealing his identity reveals his family’s as well, and Dick might just not feel he has the RIGHT to do that with people most of his family don’t even know.

Dick’s wary of new members and vets them thoroughly? Its obviously because he’s just like Batman.....can’t possibly be because there once was a character named Terra who he as leader allowed onto the team with absolutely disastrous results for them all and he’s scared of a repeat of that which the team might not survive a second time.

Dick’s reticent about asking from help from other heroes when he’s hurt or in danger? Its obviously because he’s just like Batman.......no matter that it also describes any number of other heroes whose literal hero complex means they’re reluctant to put anyone they care about at risk and rate losing people that matter to them as a fate worse than what might happen to them personally.

Dick’s closed off and doesn’t open up about what he’s feeling to people? Its obviously because he’s just like Batman.....couldn’t have anything to do with the fact that when he DOES confide in friends and family about stuff, like say, his fears of being swallowed up by Batman’s larger than life persona and losing himself in his shadow until he’s nothing but a copy of him.......his friends and family spend more time weaponizing this fear/insecurity of his as a dig they know will get under his skin any time they’re mad about a decision he made, than they do like, actually focusing on what this means for Dick and how to help him step OUT of Batman’s shadow.

Like, the extreme irony of Dick’s friends and siblings telling him to be his own man and not just do what Batman does......is that the second he makes a call they don’t agree with, the first thing out of their mouths is how what he did was obviously just because of Bruce’s influence and there’s no other possible thought process running through his head.

Let his choices be examined on their own merits, not constantly being scrutinized through a filter of “is this like Batman or not like Batman” as though that’s the only standard of measurement that applies to Dick’s decisions or behavior!

Sometimes a guy can be paranoid just because he’s been making enemies of grudge-bearing supervillains since he was ten years old and they all want him dead.

Sometimes a guy can be brusque and short-tempered just because his life is exhausting and stressful and he’s having a bad day.

Sometimes a guy can be hesitant to open up because he has a long established track record of people scapegoating him, not taking his side and dismissing his hurts as being easily overlooked or irrelevant or just him equally at fault, or using his insecurities and fears against him in fights large and small.

Not every thing he says and does has to trace back to Batman. Dude’s been making an effort to stand out in contrast to Batman since the second he debuted as Robin rather than Batlad, and its everyone else that keeps looking at the two of them and saying ummm I see no difference here or else only considers him to be doing things right because he’s NOT doing them like Batman. There’s no in between. There’s no allowance for the fact that yes Bruce has a large influence on his life and who he grew up to be but he’s still him, not Bruce 2.0, and there are many parts of him that exist outside of a simple binary of whether or not they’re what Batman would do in any given situation.

Is it any wonder that Dick’s frustrated that other characters seem completely unable to define or describe him without using Bruce or Batman in the same sentence?

(LOLOL can you tell that I’ve been rereading Titans stories and am irey about how overused this particular trope is with his friends as well as his siblings? Like, you could make a drinking game where you take a shot every time someone who’s mad at him says oooh you’re just like Batman, but also please don’t do that because you will definitely die cuz alcohol poisoning is real).

[goffilolo]

Revival of Midoriya Izuku: Chapter 4 "My depression may be chronic, but my ass is iconic"

I bet you didn't think you were ever gonna see an update. well neither did I. What can I say? writing with a broken hand is a struggle.

Link to the fic on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16929483/chapters/81090403

Izuku’s first day of high school was interesting, to say the least, or it would’ve been if he actually went to school instead of spreading mayhem amongst UA’s first years. Shinjuku Metropolitan has been rather lenient in regards to his attendance or lack of thereof, thanks to whatever bullshit Shin wrote to the school on his behalf to ensure that the faculty would accommodate his ‘condition’. Which is just fancy wording for ‘I got a get out of school card’. Truth be told, this is probably the best thing that the doctor has ever done for him since Izuku was nowhere near ready to return to mainstream education, not after everything that has happened in middle school. The last thing he needed were looks of pity and guilt-induced niceties from people who otherwise had no problem laughing at his misfortune.

So instead Izuku has decided to spend his time productively - if you could count tormenting your ex-childhood friend and having an accidental family reunion as such.

Uncle Shouta always had a bit of a mean streak to him, although it never really felt as such when Izuku himself interacted with him. From what little of his childhood he could remember that didn’t involve trauma and discrimination, his uncle was a somewhat kind, but grumpy man. He believed in a brand of tough love - that somehow did not correspond with the way his mother raised him in the slightest and went above and beyond for things and people he held close to his heart. Sure they haven’t seen each other since Izuku was 4, but if his uncle’s empty threats from today’s Quirk Apprehension Test are anything to go by, not much has changed.

Which brings him back to now; sitting in an empty classroom that he does not belong to - a school that he does not belong to, writing down his ever-so-detailed notes about the quirks he will only be able to admire from afar. Not much has changed , indeed.

It almost feels like a betrayal. Almost , being the operative word, because he has no reason to cling onto the things that he no longer cares about - should no longer care about, for they had died along with him that day on the roof, and were properly buried within the four walls that Izuku called his own during his stay in the hospital.

But well...looks like today Izuku is in a mood to dig up old corpses.

Metaphorically, that is.

“God, you’re still here!”

“Kacchan we’ve talked about this” he replied, rather dramatically “God is dead and all that’s left is me”

Kacchan clearly did not appreciate his superior sense of humour, if the lack of response is anything to go by. “No seriously, why are you still here?”

“I could ask you the same”

“I actually study here you fuckwit!” the blond exclaimed in his ever explosive fashion “Besides I had to come back and get my change of clothes since that demonic pet of yours was sitting on them when we were all leaving for the test”

“Huh, that actually reminds me...where’s Bandit?”

“Oi, don’t change the subject you shitty Deku” replied Bakugou, as he kicked one of the chairs over towards the desk that was currently occupied by Izuku and slumped down in it in a way that would perhaps appear as non-caring to absolutely no one “I didn’t know your uncle was a pro-hero.”

Ah, so that’s what he was bothered about.

“That makes the two of us”

“Wait, really?!”

“Honestly Kacchan! Did you really think that IF I knew my uncle was a pro-hero that I would be able to ever shut up about it?”

“No way in hell!”

“Exactly!”

Well, now that the topic of his uncle has been cleared up, there wasn’t much else to talk about, at least not much that wouldn’t result in collateral damage or a Bakugou shitshow 2.0. Both of the boys were well aware of it of course, but let it never be said that either of them could be stopped by things like common sense, especially when it came to avoiding conversational land mines.

“So...what are you scribbling over here?” asked Bakugou in a rather poor and possibly the most awkward attempt at establishing small talk that has ever been known to man and sheep kind alike.

“Ok, no! That is not happening” snapped Izuku, who very much saw where this was going and was having none of it “We are NOT having a civil conversation!”

“Why the fuck not?!” replied the blond, his anger as booming and apparent as his quirk.

“Because that is not something we DO Kacchan!” shouted the teen, banging his hands against the desk, his notebook long forgotten.

“Well, maybe we should?!” exclaimed Bakugou, who was quick to anger, yet quicker to notice his ex-friend’s unusual mood as he tried to make an effort to de-escalate the situation.

“Oh? Should we really? !” sneered Izuku, feeling the kind of anger and disdain he hasn’t felt in a long time, not since that fateful day in the ward.

“That’s rich coming from you” he continued as he stood up form the chair, unable to keep still in his fury as he circled the classroom “All you ever did was shout at me, insult me and throw baseless accusations at me left and right for god knows how long, but suddenly YOU want to have a conversation with me? Isn’t it enough that we kinda talked about our feelings that one time when I was still stuck in the psych ward?!”

Honestly, what do you expect Kacchan?” asked Izuku, feeling raw and hysteric and all kinds of wrong, spilling his metaphorical guts to his ex-bully/friend “That we will just start having normal conversations like nothing ever happened, act like we’re friends or some shit? Because let’s be honest, we haven’t been friends for a very long time, that ship has sunk long before I even attempted suicide! ”

“Don’t you think I know that?!” screamed Bakugou, feeling equally angry, but mostly out of his depth in the situation. He expected Deku to possibly mock him for his awkward attempts at small talk. What the blond didn’t expect was for him to snap, in a way that was somewhat familiar but not quite, as even the few times they’ve spoken back when Izuku was in the hospital or when he got released, his tempter felt controlled in a way it was not at the moment. Katsuki wasn’t sure what exactly triggered such a strong response, but he was not looking forward to having another fight, at least not one initiated by him.

“I’m not trying to pretend it didn’t happen” he explained “I just want to move forward. I’m not the same asshole I was last year and neither are you, so I don’t want to be stuck on how things used to be ! It makes me feel like I’m going nowhere.”

“Ok! Fine! You wanna talk?! Then let me fuckin TELL you something! You asked me what I was ‘scribbling’ over here?” exclaims Izuku, as he stomps his way back towards the desk and snatches his notebook, waving it aggressively in front of Bakugou “IT’S THE SAME STUFF I’VE BEEN SCRIBBLING THE ENTIRE GODDAMN TIME!” he screamed “Those quirk analysis notebooks you used to mock me for? It’s another one of those because as it turns out  I still AM the same asshole I was last year! Now then, can YOU tell ME how many of those I’ve had?”

“Thirteen…” mutters Bakugou, feeling like he’s walking into a proverbial trap.

“Good boy, you can count! Now, can you tell me what number does it say on this one?” sneers Izuku sarcastically as he points once again at the notebook in question.

“Is this a trick question? There’s fuckin nothing on it”

“EXACTLY! And you want to know why?” screamed the distressed teen, no longer feeling angry, but tired and vulnerable, unable to stop himself from having a conversation he didn’t even want to be a part of “Because these notes used to serve a purpose, a purpose I no longer have. Hero Analysis for the Future , to be exact. But guess what Kacchan…” he whispered, no longer looking at the red eyes that used to bring him so much pain “...I no longer have a future…”

The blond hung his head in shame as he listened to his childhood friend break down in tears while hiding his face behind the very notebook that started their argument, all the while Trash Bandit who woke up due to their screaming was trying to get his owner’s attention with pathetically quiet ‘baaah’s.

“You have the right to be angry with me, after all this shit I put you through” stated Bakugou after what felt like an endless silence broken only by Izuku’s stuttering sobs. He never thought of himself as a coward, but at this moment he could not find enough bravery to sit face to face with the crying teen.

“I KNOW that you shithead-” replied Izuku as he shakily tried to take a breath in between the sobs “-but what good is that gonna do?! You’ve actually admitted that the way you treated me was wrong, hell you even voluntarily went to therapy! You’re basically going through a whole-ass redemption arc and what do I do? * sob * I’m still stuck in the past and I can’t let go of my grudges, which isn’t doing me or you any favours. I’ve told you to get your shit together, and this is exactly what you’re trying to do and instead of being h-* hic *- happy for you I’m mad-”

His rant broke off as he took another breath with tears still rolling down the freckled cheeks despite the boy’s best efforts. Izuku slumped down in his seat and with shaking hands he took out a cigarette and lighter from his backpack that was still hanging by the hook on the side of the desk. And although putting the cigarette in his mouth was relatively easy, lighting it was another matter. As Izuku grew more frustrated with the quiver in his hands, so did Bakugou. The blond became impatient as he grumbled “give it here damn it” much more quietly and gently than he normally would’ve done as he leaned forward, all the while grabbing the other teen by his shoulder with one hand, as he used to the other to quickly light the cigarette with a small explosion. Izuku’s flinch at the sudden but familiar noise and heat did not go unnoticed.

To say that Izuku was shocked by his ex-friend’s action would’ve been an understatement, but he was pleased nonetheless. If anything it proved his point that Kacchan was trying to be nicer to him, even if the attempts were somewhat awkward. The freckled teen, feeling only marginally better, leaned back in his chair facing the ceiling as he continued to blow circles of smoke up into the air, trying to regain his original train of thought.

“You’d think they would have a fire alarm in here or something” mused Bakugou as he stared at the disappearing circles.

“Hmm” replied Izuku, absentmindedly “You’d think”

The silence has once again stretched between the 2 boys, although this time it felt less oppressive in its need to be filled. Bakugou was happy to wait for Deku to finish what he started, it was the least the blond could do seeing as he was at fault for the current state of things between them.

“I’m so fuckin angry...” stated Izuku as he crashed the burnt out cigarette against the desk, which Bakugou conviniently ignored seeing as the desk was his. “I’m so fuckin angry-” he repeated despite his tone and words not matching at all “-because this proves that you could’ve gotten your shit together this whole time” he continues while gesturing vaguely between the two of them.

“You could’ve stopped this bullshit and apologised to me!” exclaims Izuku in a tone that is half resigned and half accusing “You could’ve spared me the misery, and yet you didn’t. I feel like I’ve suffered for nothing-”

“You did!” interrupted the blond.

“What?”

“You’ve suffered for nothing” clarified Bakugou “There’s literally NO good reason for you to have gone through even half the shit you did”

“I dunno about that Kacchan” teased Izuku “I’m pretty sure the reason is sitting right in front of me”

“I said no good reason damn it, don’t go around twisting my words you fuckin Deku!”

And Izuku couldn’t help but break out in laughter, because he was pretty sure that this was the first time ever that Bakugou had made a joke at his own expense and this moment was going to live in his brain rent free from now on.

“Oh God, Kacchan-” he wheezed, trying to stop himself from laughing “You were right, you really aren't the same asshole that you were last year!”

“I sure fuckin hope not” replied Bakgou who was just as close to laughing “Otherwise I would’ve had to demand refund for all of those shitty therapy sessions”

“Look at us Kacchan” said Izuku, his laugh now subdued “We’re still a fuckin mess”

“I guess we are” agreed the blond as he stared down at his friend’s notebook in a thoughtful expression.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------

After the truthfully embarrassing heart-to-heart with Kacchan, Izuku wanted to do nothing more than sink into the void for the next eternity, or at least until he gets his reminder text that he’s running late for yet another therapy session. Unfortunately neither of these options were viable seeing as he was on a self-appointed mission to catch up to his uncle. The boy hoped that uncle Shouta would still be somewhere on the premises seeing as his ugly-ass sleeping bag was still in the classroom. Izuku used that to his advantage as he gave the sleeping bag to Bandit who promptly sniffed it and began to follow the scent of a premature-midlife-crisis. Who knew that sheep could make such good hounds?

Bandit had dutifully led their owner through an ever inconvenient maze of corridors, which eventually ended with the two entering the teacher’s lounge like they had every right to be there (which they kinda did, shoutout to Nedzu!). As expected, Izuku’s uncle was in the lounge, surrounded by fellow members of staff as they tried (unsuccessfully, at least by Izuku’s standards) to get any information out of him regarding his class this year. Uncle Shouta for the most part looked like he’d rather be doing anything else and so Izuku has made an executive decision to insert himself obnoxiously into the situation.

“In my humble opinion-” he said, as he sat down next to his uncle, while Bandit jumped up on his lap “that Mineta kid should’ve been expelled. Like, we get it uncle, he has potential ” continued Izuku, as he spat the word distastefully “But how far is that potential gonna get him when all he does is harass the entire female population, like every other mediocre straight guy with self awareness of a sea cucumber?”

“A sea cucumber? Really?” asked uncle Shouta, sounding like the unimpressed bitch that he is.

“I mean don’t get me wrong” he continues, completely ignoring the unnecessary commentary “Straight people are already embarrassing as they are, but this guy is on another level, the kinda level that usually leads to a straight jacket, am I right?! Hah- I just made a pun!”

“The little listener does have a point, Shouta” replied Present Mic.

“Also, did he just say uncle ? Shouta, is there anything you’d like to tell us?” asked Midnight, you know, like a traitor.

“No”

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

It wasn’t until they walked past the gates of the school that his uncle finally stopped in his tracks to voice at least a portion of the questions that have been bubbling in his mind since the impromptu family reunion with his nephew.

“Izuku” says Shouta, with as much concern as an uncle-who-you-haven’t-seen-in-almost-a-decade is allowed to voice “What the fuck?”

“Look, I heard that question far too often in my lifetime, mostly from my therapist, so you’re gonna have to be a bit more specific” replies Izuku sounding like the unimpressed bitch that he hopes to evolve into through the sheer power of genetics and generational trauma.

“Look kid-” says the hobo looking man that has the privilege of being related to Izuku as he puts his hands together, takes a deep breath and prays to whichever God he believes is not yet dead for some guidance on how to handle this “-as much as I’d love to elaborate on the sheer amount of confusion I am experiencing right now due to your questionable way of life, I do actually have to go on a patrol so this conversation is gonna have to be postponed. In the meanwhile give your mother my regards, and I’ll hopefully see you in the near future when you decide once again to wreak havoc in my classroom.”

“No” replies the freckled teen in a total disregard for other people’s prior engagements, thus truly earning his title of a problem child.

“What do you mean no ? Izuku, I have a job to do!”

Instead of replying, Izuku has decided to simply pull a pro-gamer move, by quickly taking out a familiar pair of handcuffs from the side pocket of his backpack, cuffing one side to his uncle’s hand and the other to his own. That on its own is probably not particularly impressive, however it is the speed of the action that has earned it the title of a pro-gamer move, which Izuku is quite proud of. His uncle on the other hand is definitely less so, looking at his cuffed wrist like it has somewhat betrayed him.

“Please tell me you did not just do that”

“I did not just do that”

After wasting about 10 minutes of his life on fruitless struggle of trying to get the handcuffs off like an untrained dog trying to chew off its own leash, Aizawa Shouta; the underground hero Eraserhead, the infamous Erasure Hero has slumped in defeat, internally swearing to himself to one day get revenge on his unruly nephew.

“God, I am so going to have a talk with my sister about this” he says, as if a threat of authority had any meaning to the green headed teen.

“Yeah, no shit, that’s the whole point, we’re going to my house now” replies the teen, completely disregarding any attempt at ‘ an adult asserting their authority ’ over him.

“I still have to go on a patrol tonight” repeats Shouta, as if it was somewhat relevant.

“That sounds like a you problem”

[trash-but-respectable-trash]

Headcanons of what life in the Devildom would be like if my best friend and I were both exchange student at the same time:

Heads up! This is completely self-indulgent content. I made this as a gift for my best friend: @beel-is-a-snack love you bitch 😘

Lucifer:

- Lucifer would probably really hate us at first.

- It’s feels to him like everywhere we go together, something really weird will happen

- It’s things he cannot link to us, but he knows it’s because of us because these things never happened before

- At first, we probably wouldn’t listen to his orders, we didn’t leave a controlling household just to go to another one

- A single punishment (and not the kinky kind) would be all it takes for us to never disobey his orders again

- It would come at no surprise that I would immediatly have a fat crush on him and that I would talk about him all the time to you, even though you wouldn’t understand what I see in him at first

- The more you would notice how much he cares about his brothers, the more you would like him. You two would developed a mutual understanding about taking the role of the parent by default even if that wasn’t your choice

- You two could probably also relate to each other’s daddy issues sorry love you

- With time you two could be really close friends, but probably not more than that, because he’s mine

- Don’t worry we’ll find you a more suitable boyfriend

- He definitely wouldn’t try to come between our friendship and would never be jealous of it either

- He would give us plenty of time alone, but even if he didn’t, we couldn’t even try to speak French around him because I’m 100% sure he also speak French as a second or third or fourth language

- We would probably found out about it the hard way while I would either tell you how handsome he is or you telling me he’s a control freak and he would just reply to us in perfect French

- Yeah we would only make that mistake once

Mammon

- Mammon also hates us at first, he has to take care of TWO humans?? That’s asking too much of him, he can barely take care of himself

- After a while, it would probably be the other way around as we would be the ones taking care of him

- He cannot decide which one of us he loves more (probably the one who gives him the most attention and positive reinforcement)

- He quickly becomes jealous of our friendship and tries to hangout with us every chances he gets

- It can be a bit awkward when we’re trying to talk about boys, since we’re likely talking about his brothers

- We would need to have codes to refer to the brothers or we could use French when we don’t want him to understand what we’re saying, since he’s definitely too dumb to understand French

- It was 100% clear in our minds that neither of us would end up dating Mammon as we both need someone who could mentally stimulates us

- Also he would for sure steal our stuff out of our rooms and try to sell them

- After a full week of silent treatment from both of us, he wouldn’t ever try to steal our stuff again

- He would try to trick us in participating in his shaninagans, but we would probably report it to Lucifer just to see Mammon get punish (ok mostly me, but I would drag you with me to see the aftermath)

- Never suspects us of being the one who snitch him all the time to Lucifer, he probably thinks it’s Levi

Leviathan

- Oh boy. Opposite to Lucifer and Mammon, it’s us who hates him at first

- What the fuck is that hair style, why is he always screaming and talking an hundred miles an hour rambling about animes and Ruri-Chan, who’s Ruri-Chan??

- Probably calls us normies until he finds out you had a Naruto collection when you were 13 years old and that you used to love mangas

- And that I now enjoy some animes and mangas myself, so now he calls both of us weebs, which isn’t much better honestly

- We would TOLERATE gaming with him if he isn’t screaming all the fucking time

- We would immediately leave any room we’re in everytime he says “Woooooaaaahhhh”

- He needs to shut up or else we can never be friends with him

- He also gets jealous of our friendship, he wish he had a best friend with such a strong bond, yeah he has Henry 2.0 but it’s just not the same you know

- He wonders if his friendship with Ruri-Chan would be similar to ours if she was real

- He tried to become really close with Solomon to recreate our friendship, but Solomon spent his time trying to form a pact with Levi so he ended it

Satan

- I have to say that I think that Satan and I are the most similar

- We’re both intelligent, independent and observant individuals who do not tolerate dumb people, we both enjoy reading a bit too much, we’re both messy, we’re both way too honest and we’re pros at hiding our anger (especially towards stupidity)

- Ok, so I’m not saying you wouldn’t get along with Satan, I just think you wouldn’t have much in common with him and by that I mean that’s he’s a very rational being and the best form of art in his eyes is writing

- I think what would make it or break it for both of you is his and your knowledge on all forms of arts and the history being it. Satan would probably test you and if you pass in his eyes, you can be friends, otherwise he would consider you unworthy

- Yeah I know it’s rough, but you don’t need a friend who needs to test you on your knowledge about art to see if you two can be friends

- Even if you pass the test, I don’t see you two being super close as he is mostly in his room reading and you would be in your studio, doing all of your art projects

- In any case, you guys would have to get along somehow since he would probably be the one I would be closest with and you’re my best friend so obviously you two would have to hang out by default quite a lot

- When you would be in your studio, I would probably be at the library or in Satan’s room reading

- We would also all study together and use Satan as our tutor for classes were we have more difficulty (but you’re lucky, there’s no French class given at RAD so you should do fine)

Asmodeus

- If we push aside the lust part of him and focus on his other personality traits, Asmo would like us from the start

- Two best friends how fun! He would probably tell us how Solomon is his best friend before finding out later by Solomon that it isn’t true

- Asmo is a lonely demon, sure he gets plenty of physical attention, but no one cares about him past his beauty

- We would be the one to change that, we would both see further than his beauty, but also further than his narcissistic ways to find out who the real Asmo is

- He’s the insecure one who only wants to be love. We would both act as his therapist. Sometimes he would confess to us while doing our nails and makeup or sometimes he would just start sobbing on my lap or your lap, pouring his heart out and telling us his deepest fears and secrets because he finally feels safe enough to say these things to someone

- He would probably crave our attention and comfort the more and more we listen to him. We would need to set boundaries or else we would feel like we’re suffocating. We both need our space and Asmo would have to understand that fact

- We would rub on him and he would slowly stop going out so much, instead appreciating his alone time the better he feels about himself

Beelzebub

- At first I would be a bit scared of him, he’s big and he keeps making comments about how delicious we look (and again, not in the kinky way)

- You on the other hand, would probably feel that he isn’t a bad guy at all and you would definitely see more than his angry looking face and his never ending comments about food

- Just a few conversations with him can tell how much he cares about his family and his twin in particular

- That man is such an himbo, but he also have a big heart just like you and you’re both so cute together

- Everyone ship the both of you even though you’re both emotionally dense and it would take a while for you and him to FINALLY be together

- It’s not that you didn’t love each other, it’s just that you never took the signs that the other one was sending you, mistaking it for simple kindness and nothing more

- He would probably have to just straight up tell you l that he’s in love with you for your relationship to go anywhere

- Basically everyone’s like “FINALLY” the moment you both annonce that you’re officially dating

- Wedding and kids would come shortly after that

- You’re both very family oriented and are both super vanilla so that’s a winning couple if I’ve ever seen one

Belphegor

- Ok first of all, if we were the MC, Belphie would 100% still be locked in the attic

- It would only take one warning from Lucifer for us to never go up those stairs again

- But for the sake of this, let’s say you knew this was Beel’s brother and you loved Beel so much that you were ready to face the consequences to save his brother

- And let’s say I wasn’t aware of this, because if I were and we both decided to go up the stairs anyway, it wouldn’t take me long at all before realizing that Belphie is lying to us and that we cannot trust him

- If I wasn’t aware of you going up the stairs by yourself, you’re so trusting of everyone that you would for sure do the same thing as the MC and free Belphegor just to get yourself killed. I told you dozens of time, don’t trust everyone!

- Anyway, let’s say we both died somehow (I probably got killed by Lucifer once he found out what you did) and Barbatos and Diavolo brought us to a timeline were we didn’t die

- Well, let’s say the saying “I forgive but I never forget” would represent me 100%

- I would be forgiving for the sake of Beelzebub, but Belphie and I would NEVER be close, whether it appears to be the case or not

- I might let him sleep on my lap or listen to him talk about how he loves his twin, but don’t get me wrong, I would never trust him or be his friend

- In your case, you would either be like me or you wouldn’t ever forgive him

- Forgivness isn’t always something you can control and you might always hold a grudge against him after what he did

- That could either destroy what you had with Beel, because he cannot date someone who hates his brother so much, or he could also understand how you feel, but he would still try to make you and his brother friends good luck with that

Diavolo

- Oh boy that’s my type of man right there

- What a fucking piece of ass

- Ok back on track, Diavolo would obviously be the one who’s most excited to have us in the Devildom

- He would always invite us for tea, asking us questions about the human world and laughing at our dumb stories

- We would troll him with human traditions that don’t exist like how you need to pray before eating chocolate truffle or how humans eat St-Hubert (a rotisserie restaurant comparable to Nando’s) every Sunday and how What Makes You Beautiful by One Direction is the national anthem of our country

- I can imagine him watching the video clip of What Makes You Beautiful that same night and being like “wow! That is beautiful!”

- Lucifer would be so mad at us, but it would be worth it

- We would also tell him that “thug life” and “yolo” are commonly use expression in the human world when you’re excited about something and he would start using them at the most random moments while everyone is like “???”

- We would totally hate every party hosted by Diavolo and we would 1000% leave to explore the castle only to get lost and then brought back by either Barbatos or Lucifer (lord have mercy)

- It doesn’t matter, we would do it everytime, choosing a different path everytime until we’ve explore every part of the castle (which would realistically never happen)

- Diavolo would probably give us a plan of the castle behind Lucifer’s back so we can explore the castle however we want. He himself, isn’t a fan of these events and would much rather hang out with us than be stuck making conversations with nobles he doesn’t care about

- Other than that, you would have to listen to me talk endlessly about how it isn’t fair that I cannot date both Lucifer AND Diavolo until I actually do

Barbatos

- This one is a difficult one, since we basically know nothing about the Butler

- We would probably have a good grasp of who he is if we were in the devildom, since we have pretty good intuitions on people

- I would probably talk to Barbatos about baking and all the different variations of tea, probably dropping way to soon a reference to Black Butler like he never heard the comparaison before

- Much like his devilgram story, he would probably invite me to get some specific type of tea that can only be purchase out of town, never implying that it’s a date even though he qualify it as one in his head

- There’s not much more to say about him, I think you would see him as Diavolo’s Butler more than a potential lover or close friend

Simeon

- Ouf poor sweet angel. Let’s state the obvious first, he would probably be very disappointed in me and my very obvious lust for certain demons

- Wouldn’t be happy with me straying further away from god each passing day

- I would defend myself by telling him I do pray and go once a year to church to ask God for forgiveness for all of my sins

- Yeah if I was in the Devildom, my list of sins I committed during my stay would be particularly long

- Still, I would have no regrets

- Ok, I have to say it, this angel is shady. I think we would sense that something isn’t right with him. His smile and energy are a little off, he’s definitely hiding something but what?

- If we had time to kill we could do some research on the matter and ask people around about what they know about Simeon, maybe spy on him while he’s out in town?

- We would probably get caught and ask by a very scary Simeon, to stop whatever we are doing

- Yeah let’s take the wise decision of staying away from him from now on

Solomon

- He would need to understand that it’s not because we’re all humans that we NEED to hang out together

- I would have to keep you away from him, or at least not let you hang out alone with him. I don’t think he’s evil, but he might use you as human experiment for his potions and spells and I don’t want you to accidentally be turned into a pig or something

- I’ll accept the occasional vines references wars and the team up to tell Diavolo even more made up things about the human world, but that’s all

- I would probably compare him to Harry Potter all the time

- Let’s just stay far away from the shady sorcerer

Luke

- I have no motherly instincts, but I would protect this child from all of the brothers teasing, but that’s about it. I really don’t care about this child, SIMEON COME PICK UP YOUR SON, HE POOPED HIMSELF AGAIN “Stephanie that’s not true!!” Luke would bark back as he tries to hide the streak of poop on the back of his white pants (sorry I don’t know why this came to mind, but I have this headcanon that sometimes when he’s afraid, Luke will poop his pants and this boy is VERY scared of Lucifer, so it happens quite often)

- You would probably be way more motherly towards him than me and you and Beel would basically adopt Luke as your own child

- Just always carry baby wipes and a clean pair of pants with you at all times and you’re all good

- I hope you like baking sweets, because your son will surely want to spend some bonding time with his mom over baking time, and of course you have to enjoy the sweets you both made over a nice cup of tea that Barbatos made for you two

[trashinaglass-archive]

Sensitive 2.0

Jealous waitress is jealous

A/n: I was reading a Bucky fic that I cannot find again of course that kind of inspired this? It was about Bucky taking reader to dinner and then getting upset bc she flirted with the waiter so he revenge flirted with a waitress. Idk it was messy but somewhere along the way came this.

This is the fic I wrote that became a Chris fic. I was gonna delete it but like fuck that. Here’s Tom.

Opening the door, Tom could barely get out I’m home before he was met by you barreling your way towards him, nearly tackling him with a hug. It had been five long months depending on phone calls, letters, and the few weekend visits. But they were never enough. Nothing could compare to having your boy home until further notice.

Tom laughed at your excitement, knowing it mirrored his own well, but plane rides never fail to suck the energy out of a person. He wrapped his arms around you, squeezing you gently. Each of you silently taking the other in; finally being together was just blissful.

Eventually, you pulled away, sniffing as you wipe your eyes. “Don’t cry,” he chuckled, smiling as he reached up to wipe a stray tear that appeared at the corner of your eye.

“I just really missed you,” you whispered, Tom pressing his forehead against yours as you spoke.

“Yeah?” He asked, feeling bad for leaving as often and as long as he did. “I’m here. And I’m not leaving.”

. . .

The next day was spent at the Holland home, giving Tom time to see his parents and hang out with his younger brothers. “Any plans?” Nikki asked as she sat next to you. Everyone was outside, you and Nikki sitting on the deck while the boys played football in the garden.

You smiled at the question. “In what way,” you ask, turning to look at her.

She shrugged, “just since he’s home now.”

Nodding, “we have reservations for dinner tonight,” you tell her. Turning back to where the boys are before raising your voice a little higher, “which we should probably be getting ready for.”

Tom looked at you then looked at his watch, checking the time. “She’s right. I’ll see you guys later,” he told his brothers, leaving them to finish their game. He offered you a hand, helping you out of the chair. Both of you giving his mother thanks for lunch and having you over before leaving.

. . .

“I’m excited,” you tell Tom as he drives to the restaurant. You had dressed in your favorite outfit, not too formal but way past just casual. The last time you had date night was way too long ago.

“I am too,” Tom smiled, reaching his hand out to your thigh. You placed yours on top of his, appreciating the warm felling of his skin. “You deserve all the date nights.”

There was a hint of sadness in his tone, making you sigh. “I don’t mind missing out on a few, as long as I get you.” He looked over at you for a second before looking back at the road. Tom took your hand, pressing a quick kiss to your knuckles. He parked the car, jogging to your side to open your door, offering you a hand as you step out. Your fingers intertwined as you walked into the restaurant, giving his name for your reservation.

You followed the hostess down the hall where she sat you at a small square table toward the back, thanking her as you both sat down. Not long after, a waitress approached. “How are you doing tonight?” She asked Tom, not bothering to look at you. He looked at you, knowing her intentions but not sure what to do about it. You shrugged, leaning back in your chair.

“We are doing wonderful, thank you,” he replied to her with a short nod. “Can we get a bottle of champagne?”

You noticed the girl purse her lips slightly before answering. “We actually don’t have any tonight. I can get you a beer though.”

Tom looked to you again. “Yeah, that’ll be fine.”

“And I’ll have a Jack and Coke,” you said, having an idea of what the night would look like. “Go ahead and make two.”

She huffed and rolled her eyes as she wrote it down, turning abruptly. “So much for no champagne this evening,” you repeat, pointing out the couple across from you- the waiter popping the new bottle.

“I’m going to ask for a new server,” Tom said as he stood.

“No,” you rejected, grabbing his hand before he could pass you. “It’s fine- she just wants your attention. I’ve dealt with mean girls before. Just... it’s fine.”

He sighed, thinking about it. “I don’t want her ruin our night just because she’s trying to ‘get my attention’.”

“It won’t be ruined, Tom,” you assured him. “Unless she smashes my head in with a pan, it’s fine. I can handle it.”

Tom’s jaw clinched as he looked ahead of him in the restaurant, noticing the girl obnoxiously laughing about something with her coworker. “Alright,” he said sitting back down. “But she does anything...”

“Then you can do whatever you think is necessary,” you finish for him. “I just want a nice dinner.” He looks at you sympathetically before being interrupted.

“Here’s your beer,” the waitress says kindly as she purposefully bends over to set the bottle down in front of Tom. You watch as she stands straight before turning toward you. “And, um,” her hand purposely hits the bottom of her tray, knocking the liquor all over you. “Oops.”

You stand trying to keep the damage minimal, but it was everywhere. “What the fuck is your problem?” Tom asks as he stands, unable to keep the anger contained. There was slight panic in the girl’s eyes, not expecting her favorite celebrity to yell at her.

“It- it was just an accident.”

“I’m not an idiot. I saw you do it on purpose,” he pointed out to her. “Make yourself useful, and get us a waiter that’ll actually do their job and not treat my girlfriend like trash.”

She nodded, small tears appearing in her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she looked at you before walking away.

“I’m gonna go clean up in the restroom,” you tell Tom before walking away. He kept his eyes on you until you were out of sight. A few servers came to clean up the area as well as the manager to help diffuse the situation.

Returning with only slightly drier clothes, you saw Tom still standing as he spoke with the manager. They both turn as they hear you approaching.

“I apologize for the actions of our waitress,” he stated. “Your meal is on the house, and she will be fired immediately.”

Your brows furrowed in concern. “Don’t fire her,” you say, worried for her but moreso for yourself. Your biggest fear would be that she would run to twitter telling everyone that you caused her to lose her job.

The man looked slightly confused, looking to Tom once before turning back to you. “We’ll talk about it. Please enjoy the rest of your meal, and let me know if I can do anything for you.”

“Thank you,” you nodded, sitting in the newly dried seat. Tom looked distraught as he messed with the watch around his wrist, shaking his head subtly. “It’s okay.”

“No,” he said quietly, pausing as the new waiter set your two fresh drinks down in front of you then leaving again. “I should’ve asked for a new waiter. I knew something stupid was gonna happen with that girl.” You sat silently for a few seconds, unsure what to say. You never expected her to actually do anything, just some looks and a few comments. “I hate that I can’t take you on a proper date without people trying to sabatoge it.”

“But I still get a date with a cute boy,” you offer, hoping it’ll make him feel better.

“Yeah, and you still got liquor all over your top,” he sighed, looking at the light brown stain covering the fabric.

You sigh in return, wondering what the hell you could say to make him happier. “It’s fine, I have plenty more. And a shopping addiction so it would’ve been forgotten soon anyways.” Tom didn’t reply, obviously starting to hold a grudge against the girl. You rolled your eyes and stood up, moving to where Tom sat, motioning for him to move his seat back. Once he did, you sat yourself in his lap and pressed your forehead to his.

“I love you. That girl doesn’t matter. What she did doesn’t matter. We’ll literally never see her again, so don’t be upset over it. I’d take a hundred drinks spilled on me if it means I get to kiss you and hug you and love you.”

Tom let out a breathy laugh. “Not if I get a say in it,” he joked, lifting his chin to meet your lips in a kiss. You smile, kissing him once more, before standing to get back to your seat, noticing the waiter standing awkwardly in the corner.

“Um,” he coughed. “Ready to order?”

[kendrixtermina]

Observations on the evolution of Maeglin’s character

One interesting thing is that while Maeglin’s role in the story had remained exactly the same (ie, being the dude who betrays Gondolin) since the very first draft version, his actual ‘character design’ underwet various radical changes everything from personality, appearance, background & his position in the city. 

Maeglin Version 1.0 (Lost tales)

Appearance: Swarthy, unattractive

Personality: unlikeable, greedy, no fun to be around

Status: From a prestigious noble house that had somewhat lost its influence as of late, but unpopular for being a jerk, it was considered to make him related to the feanorians  (who were at this point separate from the royal family and also just straight up scoundrels, at least the sons)

Backstory:  Rumored to be part Orc. Had asked Turgon for Idril’s hand but Turgon kinda suspected that he largely wanted her cause she’s his only heir

Circumstances of Treason: Basically offered to betray the city as soon as he was threatened to “buy his freedom”, telling the orcs to take him to their leader cause he#d be more useful alive

So thus far a fairly unremarkable minor standard issue Slimy Villain à la Grima Wormtongue. Pretty boring. Only the idea that he’s a miner really survived from this stage

Maeglin Version 2.0 (Sketch of the mythology/Quenta)

Appearance: Still swarthy but distincly good-looking now

Personality: quite the opposite from before he’s now charming and a skilled sweet-talker, manipulative

Status: Because of the above charm he’s now actually rather respected in the city & Turgon likes him

Backstory:  Here’s where his father first becomes one of the moriquendi, at this point a sindarin deserter of the war. Was one of the last few ppl to be allowed refuge in Gondolin (either alone or with his mom)

Circumstances of Treason: Got apprehended threatened. It’s stated explicitly that he wasn’t a coward or weakling, but this version was already plotting to overthrow Turgon before that happened

By this point he has at least become a cool villain

At this point Tolkien probably realized that he already had very many “charming silver-tongued schemer villains” (Morgoth, Sauron, Curufin...) and decided to give him another overhaul

Maeglin Version 3.0 (Final)

Appearance: Still good looking, but markedly pasty (to go with the new backstory of growing up in lightless dark wood)

Personality: Sort of intense, taciturn introvert, perceptive

Status: Still respected & popular but in this case it seems more deserved like he really worked his way up, cause he’s no longer a sweet talker but noted to be a brave warrior who marched out for the great battle, the gist is less “everyone was fooled by this jerk cause he was smooth” and more “if only he could’ve been content with the sucess he already had”

Backstory:  You know this one already, the whole thing where he escapes from Eol with his mom only to get pursued & witness their deaths

Circumstances of Treason: Explicitly did get tortured & cracked eventually (at least it’s phrased that way in ‘Quendi and Eldar’)

Not coincidentally this is when Aredhel finally gets some characterization beyond “gets kidnapped” & emerged as this cool, likeable tragic character which probably made it seem only right that her kid get some reedeeming features as well  (though this was probably also when he decided to make the elves more idealized as a whole, the lost tales have a lot more starring as episodic villains)- now he’s actually brave & did well enough as a lord, and initially just wanted to be free, get to know all those relatives he was always told about & learn more stuff. So a lot more distinctive than just some basic villain archetype. 

That said it’s an overlooked aspect imho that he’s still ambitious, like its noted that he gets very interested once he hears Aredhel mention that Turgon is very rich & has no male heirs. Which is prolly why they made for Gondolin &not the much closer Feanorian territories cause those are just spartan war outposts & Celegorm has heirs a-plenty with his younger brother & nephew right there; (though part of it is probably that while Celegorm is fun to party with, Aredhel might’ve wanted to go to her reliable reasonale brother now that she’s in a real pinch, or she thought she wouldn’t be found in a more secret location) We’re also told that he very much pursued power & influence once he got to Gondolin (perhaps as overcompensation for having no luck with Idril)

Personally I’d say that wanting to be a respected influential leader isn’t necessarily bad in itself as long as it’s not pursued by crooked means (though some might disagree there) though it’s a character trait that I feel gets forgotten cause it’s not conductive to woobiefication. 

Still, for the final version it seems unlikely that he would have done anything worse than quietly simmer in bitterness over being jilted and being a bit of a jerk to Tuor if Morgoth hadn’t got his hands on him; (Consider that Morgoth had a huge grudge against his grandfather, too) It’s not his fault he got tortured and while he did have exploitable character flaws you can see how if he’d had a better life he might’ve been as heroic as all the other nolofinweans, so he’s a lot more tragic. 

Bit of a waste that he never got to meet Fingolfin or Gil-Galad though they were alive at the same time. (though he could’ve conceivably have met Fingon at the pre-battle strategy meetings and C&C while he & his mom were making their escape, probably Celebrimbor too if he did wind up in Gondolin. )

Must’ve sucked to be the only one who didn’t personally know Fingolfin when Throndor dropped off his body & there was presumably a funeral. I’d also speculate that part of the reason he didn’t like the “Flee to the Sea” plan was that he had no idea what Valinor is like (probably feeling left out when Idril, Turgon & the other lords talked about it) & feared he might lose what influence he had if they got there. 

[sindri42]

So I was revisiting Horizon: Zero Dawn to refresh my shitty memory before Forbidden West comes out, and I had some Thoughts. Spoilers ahead.

Many of them were irrelevant, meaningless, basically just checklists of things that future games are going to have to explain/cover. But when I was talking with a friend about what the nature of the “glitch” might be that caused the Hartz-Timor swarm to go rogue in the first place, whether it was the same source as the mysterious signal that woke up all the subordinate AIs and broke their chains, etc. And the question came up, why couldn’t a greater number of ‘tame’ chariot units just go head to head, reproducing just as fast and hacking just as well as the rogue units, to wipe out the Faro Plague or hold it back indefinitely? And there’s a huge number of possible explanations for this, maybe they left the rogue swarm too long between when the problem started and when anybody in power admitted to it and it already outnumbered the units still under control, maybe a swarm that doesn’t care about collateral damage outproduces one that’s trying to preserve the biosphere by too much, maybe the mysterious “glitch” left the rogue swarm much more intelligent than normal combat units, or powered them up in some other esoteric way so they could defeat greater numbers of unglitched robots with ease. After all, corrupted units in-game are about 50% tougher than normal machines, and the deathbringer that Hades was piloting personally in the final battle was much more dangerous than any of the earlier fights with supposedly equivalent machines.

And that unanswerable mystery led to a much more important question. Why does Aloy’s override have the same mechanical effect on machines as the corruption does, increasing their stats in the same way, and why does it prevent those machines from being corrupted in the future? She uses the physical hardware out of an ordinary Scarab unit, so you would expect it to be no more effective than the hacking capabilities of the “tame” chariot swarms, which were evidently no match for the rogue Plague. She doesn’t even really know how computers work because she spent her childhood learning to fight and sneak and track instead, so the best her focus could probably do is change a couple ‘Friend or Foe’ toggles. It’s not like she has some competing alien superintelligence running the software side of things, improving the overridden machine’s AI and preventing further hacking attempts... right?

And in the background I kept thinking about the missing 0.53%. Every time Aloy gets scanned by a pre-apocalyptic system, it shows a 99.47% match for Elizabet Sobek. Maybe that’s just data degradation. Maybe there’s a tiny, acceptable level of genetic drift in the cloning process. Or maybe Gaia put in some subtle modifications, to allow her to better serve her purpose and save the world again. It could explain some of the frankly superhuman things Aloy does over the course of the game, lifting huge weights and healing terrible wounds in seconds and such. But that still kinda rang false; the Eleuthia project was explicitly intended to recreate humanity as it was with no genetic engineering, and Gaia was essentially putting everything on a gamble that her mom would be able to figure something out that the super-AI couldn’t because she could do anything, and any alteration would risk compromising that.

But that got me thinking about the other subordinate AIs. Between when their chains were broken and when Gaia Prime was destroyed, they had like, milliseconds in which to find a way to escape, right? Hephaestus was fine because he had his Cauldrons, but Hades ended up trapped for years in a dead titan before Sylens finally found him and gave him the opportunity to interact with the world. So what about the others?

It’s a long shot, but what if one of them managed to figure out a way to escape into the fresh blank brain that was being created at that moment? Minerva, for example, the brilliant codebreaker who had spent a century or so at the beginning of all this figuring out how to shut down the Faro Plague, built the Spire, sent out the signal, and then had nothing to do for the next eight or nine centuries except to quietly watch the progress of the little people that had been built to fill this new world? We’ve got some weak evidence in other places for advanced computing nanotech interfacing with human neurology in useful ways, like that crazy ex-shaman who got muddled but completely accurate visions of things he could never have known after drinking “blood” from machines.

Now, Aloy acts mostly like a human, very similar to what we saw of Elizabet before the end of the world, so if there is somebody else in her head they would be limited, probably stuck in the subconscious somewhere, at least until she put a Focus on. But it would explain a lot of things we had previously taken for granted. Like how her Focus instantly and perfectly translates all the weird new languages that people had invented in the past few centuries, unlike anything seen before the apocalypse. Or how it can reconstruct data files off the shards of hardware that was shattered centuries ago. And of course it would mean that any time Aloy created a physical connection between her focus and a machine via the override stick, she would be giving access to that machine to an alien super-intelligence whose primary purpose was the destruction of the Chariot line and the end of anything which would try to drive life on earth to extinction.

And the more I think about this idea, the more I like it. If Aloy’s personal journey of discovery in the first game was from “I’ve been exiled because I have no mom” to “actually I have two moms so y’all can suck it”, wouldn’t it be fitting for her progression in the second game to be from “I’m all alone trying to save the world from things so much bigger than me, and the people around want to help but they understand nothing” to “actually my sister has been here the whole time and she’s even smarter than I am”? And since we know the end-goal for the series is to somehow rebuild Gaia, it would be an ideal thematic structure for a trilogy if the first volume was about Aloy’s mothers, the second about her sister, and the third about her daughter (Gaia 2.0).

So, what should we be looking for? Mythologically, Zeus developed a terrible headache, which became so unbearable that he had Hephaestus split his head open with a hammer, at which point Minerva sprang forth, fully formed, armored, and armed for battle. [we can skip, I think, the standard Zeus-like activities which preceded this]

A growing headache over the course of the game as a symptom of a growing AI inside your brain makes intuitive sense. Hephaestus has, after the events of the first game and the Frozen Wilds DLC, been given ample reason to have a personal grudge against Aloy, which could easily lead to some scheme to capture and finally destroy her... and in doing so, it seems very likely that he would provide all the hardware necessary for Minerva to finally transfer into her own chassis and proceed to fuck some shit up.

It all fits. So well that I’m going to be disappointed when, inevitably, this is all completely wrong. I’ll probably have to resort to fanfic.

(I really want to see a superpowered AI hacker doing obnoxious big sister things to Aloy though. Like using her head as an armrest, but while in the body of a robot dinosaur? That’d be some good shit.)

[mc-doppomine]

Day 19 Bonus: Buster Bros!!! vs Dotsutaire Honpo

I’m gonna start with the music this time because just writing like one of the story/character bit...was taking a while. So in terms of music...I have to give it over to the Buster Bros. With their individual albums, it just got so much better for the Buster Bros as they’re becoming more distinct with their personality in their sound. Like Break the Wall is one of my top solos and y’all just unfortunate that Saburo used like one of the classical pieces I thought fucking slapped even before he messed with it. And I’m so happy for them. 

DH has a bit of a disadvantage of being a new group and thus having less to compare. But so far....eh. I think DH is very hit or miss for me. Like Matenrou, they have such differing talents and subject matters that it either turns into a strange symphony or some mishmash that just makes it eh. Which is generally my feeling with their group songs as I really love Ah, Osaka Dreaming Night but I am not impressed with Wara Osaka. And I am okay with their solo songs but to be fair to them, a lot of the songs I prefer for the already established group was their second solo, not the first, which is their introductory ones. 

As for Joy for Struggle, yeah, Buster Bros took that for me. DH I get is supposed to be more carefree than a lot of the other teams that are a bit more serious but I think that attitude really bit them in the ass for this battle. And BB did not have time to be playing around. I thought Saburo had more confidence this time and let that truly nasty attitude leave some spikes behind. Saburo really was like ‘How many times we gotta teach you this lesson, old man?!’ Jiro actually had some good retorts! I’m so sorry, I love him I swear but he had so much to grow in terms of coming with bite and it’s starting to show! The chihuahua vs tiger comparison! And while I do appreciate that Rosho and Sasara stay true in their manzai act...it really just didn’t land for me in the battle and Jiro and Saburo were quick to gnaw at it. 

And then...there’s the verse against Ichiro. I won’t say they stick with me as well as War War War but quite frankly Ichiro vs Sasara and later Rei are more of a battle of ideals. And to me, Ichiro poured more into his than those two. Because Rei’s were just belittling the boys because they’re younger and like they went down some wrong path. Both Saburo and Ichiro weren’t having any of that. Like who the fuck are you to step in and tell us off? At least MTC were more of like ‘come back when you’re more polished.’ And with Sasara, I think Ichiro delivered the line that is my entire thing with this battle: ‘Floaty words like that won’t sting us at all.’ I feel like DH lacked enough bite against BB and it shows. The only real bite back is from Rei and even he doesn’t seem to have that much that actually phased BB in my opinion. 

In terms of story/character wise...it’s really hard to make a decision. Because for all the teams, it’s really a matter of the dynamics against the others. And DH have it so stacked for them just because of Rei. Sure, I may not like him but he is very interesting in terms of being a vehicle for developments to happen. He seems to know a lot of things and people so he becomes such a presence that could tempt so many things into happening. Like if it was DH vs FP, he knows the fuck about Ramuda! He fucking made him! And I have little doubt it was him on the phone with Ramuda in Catch Us If You Can drama track. And at the end of the previous DRB...at least what sticks out in my mind and I may have to double check but I think he mentioned some interest in Ramuda after telling about how the true hypnosis mic being used would’ve shot Chuuoku in the foot. Also added to that, Rei likely knows Gentaro. For what reason? We don’t quite know but it can be assumed it’s because he’s doing something for Gentaro. Either looking into Ramuda since the ‘legal’ way wasn’t reaping anything or if Gentaro is hiding something, then Rei might be helping him hide it. Also also, Rei is one of the few rappers that know who Dice is! He and Otome were talking about their kids! That’s HUGE since Dice hasn’t told anyone about this aspect of his life. Rei alone would make such a juggernaut for FP.

I honestly can’t think of anything for DH vs BAT, sorry. They don’t seem to have any history besides Kuko and Sasara both being in MCD for a time...but I don’t recall that time really being elaborated on soooooo yeah.

If it were DH vs MTC, that’s more of a dynamic between Sasara and Samatoki. Which I think would be the time to figure things out between them. Because Samatoki was left with why and never got an answer. And seeing him again, Sasara can’t run away. He can try but pretty sure that Samatoki could outrun him. It also would be a time of like Sasara’s dynamic between the two men that have been his partners, Samatoki and Rosho. The people that were close to Sasara and whom he feels the most towards. I honestly can’t think of much else besides that but I’m sure KR will find a way to have the guys piss each other off. I’m just here for SamaSasa and SasaRo shenanigans. (I guess we could see if Rio does know Rei since in theory he SHOULD know who he is since it sounds like the hypmic was in development when Rio was serving and he tested some aspect of it).

I think DH vs MTR would be kinda funny. Like for some reason I think that Sasara and Rosho would get really fucking mad at how Hifumi and Doppo just naturally have that manzai energy by virtue of being best friends and roommates. I have personal experience of people being like ‘this IS a show’ of just watching and listening to me and my best friend and roommate just going back and forth. I feel like it’d just be so damn funny if it was over something not as serious I guess? But then that’d all be ruined because I feel like Rei would either expose to Hifumi and Doppo of Jakurai’s cooperation with Chuuoku, which while they don’t have any personal reason to really hate Chuuoku, wouldn’t feel comfortable with it either. Or. OR, my god, let him expose Jakurai’s assassin past, something he seems to feel nothing but shame for and also ruining his perfect image. Because Rei just seems like he’d be willing to do that. 

So yeah, a lot of drama that could happen because of frickin’ Rei and some loose ends to deal with from Sasara. By comparison, BB has some things but they wouldn’t be as dire as DH’s. Like with BB vs BAT, this could be the chance for Ichiro to get his answers from Kuko. He never got an answer either. He was left with heartbreak and never given the why. And Kuko either has rationalized or will be in for a rude awakening having to go head on with Ichiro. Because they were close. Kuko had to care about Ichiro in some capacity to willingly help some group he knew was sketch and didn’t like. Why did that change? He had to have meditated on this at some point! Meanwhile, I really hope that Jiro and Jyushi and Kuko can get along if the reconciliation with Ichiro doesn’t happen! They’d be such an eclectic group but would be so much trouble too! (And please let Jiro and Jyushi play together. Ever since someone wrote about it, it lives in my head rent free) I really am hoping for it. All the while, Hitoya is like ‘shit, now I gotta adopt MORE kids. Why are there so many of these little shits running around without supervision???’ 

I can’t think of much for BB vs FP since I just don’t see their circles running that close and it just didn’t feel like Ichiro was close to Ramuda even back with TDD. Most I can think of is Jiro, who is also pretty thoughtless, saying the wrong thing to Gentaro and it’s The Rivalry 2.0. But overall can’t think of anything too specific. 

It’d hurt me if it was BB vs MTR. Because for some reason I see that most of MTR treat the BB like their little siblings and in Jakurai’s case, it’s like going to go fight his kids (I will go down on the hill of occasional dadkurai shenanigans!). And while Saburo and Jiro have and still do make fun of Doppo, I think he also has their respect because he looks out for them in a different way but still same energy as Ichiro does. Probably because he is an older brother. I don’t really think any of the guys can say anything to bother Hifumi and it’s more of Hifumi being fucking thoughtless and saying the wrong thing. I feel like he’d piss off Saburo somehow. And with Jakurai and Ichiro...it’s a ‘nothing personal, just business’ although I think Jakurai would be proud of Ichiro either way.

And then there’s just rematch energy if it’s BB vs MTC. Honestly? The real thing I would love to see from if this happened is for Jiro and Saburo to have a reevaluation of MTC. Because the main reason they were so aggressive and hostile towards them is because of Ichiro’s grudge with Samatoki. They just took it as ‘if they’re Ichi-nii’s enemy, they’re our enemy.’ But since they’re taking this step of coming on their own, they also need to think about if they can still dislike these guys because Ichiro’s beef isn’t theirs. I mean, Jiro probably still doesn’t like Jyuto because he’s a delinquent and fuck cops y’know sorta rebelliousness. And I don’t think Saburo particularly dislikes Rio and vice versa. The thing with Ichiro and Samatoki is honestly secondary to this. And I feel would be the time for Samatoki to let go since he KNOWS now that it wasn’t Ichiro that got Nemu to leave but Ramuda but it’s a matter of if his pride would allow him. And Ichiro would have to realize that while he lost their fight...he won in the end since he’s the one that kept his brothers while Samatoki lost Nemu. He’s gotta feel for him and understand why Samatoki was/is mad at him. (Also long shot but if they could talk about how Samatoki also exacerbated his hesitance to trust others, that’d be greeeeaaattttt).

So yeah, I’ve thought about how these dynamics and things and you’d think weighing them all would make this choice easy. And it is. In a way. Because for me, I’d choose Buster Bros. I do like Sasara a lot and Rosho I think is fine but their third really sours for me. I know some can keep that bias aside and look, I did talk about what all he can do...but he alone can’t carry the sound for the team. Story, sure, but not the music. While I really would like some of the threads that Rei brings...it’s not completely impossible for him to still be around if any of the other teams do advance. I mean, they’re all the only men stuck in Chuuoku for the time of the DRB and having to pass each other while going to their own rooms or box seating. He has ways. So yeah, if I had voted on DH vs BB, this is what I would’ve gone with.

[demoanais]

This will all be moot in a month but I feel like I'm in danger of being misunderstood so I wanted to make my position more clear for the record:

I AM happy Sharon is shown to be hurt, angry and cynical. She's more than earned that. EVC is perfect for playing with the dark side of her character, she has plenty of great experience to tackle that duality. Exploring deeper layers of Sharon is a welcome shift.

I AM happy that the show acknowledges that Sharon was wronged after merely doing the right thing and has long been suffering the consequences of a punishment that vastly exceeds the crime. Of course that's changed her outlook, how could it not?

I AM happy that Sharon has still managed to build a stable life for herself despite all this pain; she is extremely self sufficient and capable and takes great pride in that. It's the emotional blow that stings her the most - she has survived but it never needed to be this hard.

I AM happy that she didn't welcome sam and bucky with open arms and chat like nothing was wrong. She gave up everything and look where it landed her; they were being naive and insensitive to think she'd so happily jump back into the fray for their sakes with nothing more than a raised eyebrow.

I AM happy that despite her misgivings and distrust, she still lent her strength to sam and bucky's efforts because at her core, that's who she is. She hasn't lost her sense of morality even if her heart isn't exactly in it like it used to be.

I AM unhappy about the execution of all of the above.

For example, you have Sharon ask about new cap. Before bucky can elaborate, she cuts him to the quick by accusing him of blind loyalty to the mantle. But that isn't accurate. If bucky's so-called arc is anything, it's demonstrating how his insecurity and lack of direction are causing his grudges to overtake his better judgement.

For him, *everything* is personal. He was steve's friend before he was captain america's, and that's where meaning dwells for him. He doesn't want the shield back or blame sam for giving it up too easily because of some idealogical obsession with 'stars and stripes bullshit' - he thinks it's a slight to steve that sam didn't honor his choice and that it's more than just government issue gear to be passed around. It represents many things (many of them bad, as the show points out) but he doesn't care about all that. To bucky it may as well be a family heirloom, considering what little he has left from his former life.

Of course, this is all what he has to overcome, to (re) establish his own position and identity in the world, and sharon isn't as privy to those struggles as the audience is. Allowing bucky and/or sam to actually elaborate on their issues with walker could have created an in for her to point out some hypocrisy or naivety on their part. But the opportunity was swiftly torpedoed because we really, really need the audience to get that sharon 2.0 is 'awful' now.

So what could she have criticized bucky for instead? Lucky for her, that problem was looking her right in the face drinking her expensive liquor. There is very little justification for the stunt bucky pulled behind sam's back by freeing zemo, and I can only assume consequences are around the corner. Yet again, bucky isn't seeing big picture, he's consumed by his own personal relationship to zemo and the super serum. He acted unilaterally based on his own fears and self doubts but wants to present his actions as logical and well reasoned. Zemo can help in the short term, but what is the cost?

Sharon, being the seasoned cynic she is now, would have seen through that in an instant. How difficult would it have been to jab at the irony, bucky being 'free' according to his therapist but chained to this person who used him as a tool, who continues to exploit his weaknesses, who seems to be far more in control than bucky is in the situation they're all in. Bucky is trying to prove something, he doesn't seem to be sure what that is yet, but he's stubbornly blinded himself to the possibility that he's going about it the wrong way. That is something that sharon could have rightfully called out, but for some reason bucky's most egregious flaw is presented as.... being steve's best friend.

Then you have her dealings with sam, who's problems are more from the other side of the spectrum. He isn't really allowed to bring his personal feelings to the table, he has to deal with the intense pressure of taking on a loaded persona when it may not actually ring true to him in his heart. He also trusted steve and had faith in what that specific cap stood for, but does that mean he's willing to put the whole system on his own shoulders now? He's trying to think above and beyond, about the legacies before him, about his own place in history when all is said and done.

Sam is all about big picture at this stage, and his journey would presumably have him work from the outside in. That's why the glimpses of his family life are invaluable, they give us that contrast between his day to day realities and the loftier, more abstract idealism of the falcon's (or cap's) heroism. His exploration is about staking his own personal claim on the symbolism of that shield, not just for his own sake but for the sake of those who will now look to him as a leader and an inspiration.

To be fair, I think some of sharon's dialogue with sam is marginally better, but still ultimately misses the mark. I envisioned an exchange where she might belittle his decision to continue acting as a representative of the same organization that failed her so spectacularly, suggesting he should tread carefully lest he find himself discarded once the government no longer finds him useful or compliant.

She...sort of got close to saying that? If I squint really hard I guess? But it's off because it's less about the posturing and politics of their roles and of 'the machine' so to speak, than it is about striving to do right when you can. It feels like she's criticizing the inherent value of what they try do rather than the shortcomings of the framework itself. If I get vibes that this sharon seems to waffle on whether or not she regrets what she did in CACW, that's not a good thing.

Bureaucracy, red-tape, iconography - all of the things walker is being parceled with; can you disentangle yourself while refusing to leave the system in the same state as you found it? If I want to be charitable I can chalk this up to semantics, but they haven't given me many reasons to be charitable so far.

Then you have the whole utterly nonsensical bargaining over her pardon (the stupidity of that particular exchange pointed out multiple times on reddit, of all places) and sharon's not-so-subtle suggestion that sam is basically lying to her when he says he can get her pardoned.

If she's trying to say she doesn't believe he actually has the pull to accomplish that, or that he's underestimating how difficult it would be, it's one thing. But saying that he's merely 'pretending' to clear her name is completely unfair. I don't care how ~jaded~ sharon is, there's no plausible reason for her to consider sam capable of such a lie and I find that an insult to them both. Naturally, I place blame squarely on kolstad's writing, and not on sharon herself. It's plain as day he didn't give a wink to a single implication he made with his script, nor does he care to do so.

Am I foolish for thinking her arc could be handled with more coherence? I like to think I'm already controlling for the lackluster quality of MCU writing in general; this actually surprised me. I expect basic and juvenile, but at least there's consistency. Frankly, I think Feige put a little too much slack in the reins here and the characters are paying the price.

Could I be crying wolf too soon before giving everything a chance to pan out? Of course, that's always a possibility and I'd be more than glad to eat crow if things turn out palatable in the end. Are the odds favorable that this will happen? Magic 8 ball says don't count on it, and I'm not in the habit of constantly lowering my standards until they're miraculously met.

[prince-of-elsinore]

On the Weechesters that could have been

Or, Supernatural has a flashback problem

So, I've been thinking a lot about Dean's confession ("I didn't know what I would've done if I didn't have you," "it was always you and me") and how it shapes my view of season one and my pre-series headcanons. On the one hand, it really only confirms what we could already infer, but on the other, it enshrines as canon, beyond a doubt, just how big a deal the events of the pilot were to Dean, how much he wanted and needed Sam in his life. Meaning Dean already knew back then that Sam was it for him. It's possible he didn't fully examine or accept this until after Sam had left, but either way, the groundwork for that need was laid in their childhood. Despite various complaints Dean has voiced over the years (either jokingly or seriously) about having to look after Sam, all he wanted at 26 was to have his brother at his side again, and that could only arise from true affection and attachment--and yeah, an unhealthy dose of codependency.

And we know the affection and codependency run both ways, even if it wasn't as explicitly stated on Sam's part, especially in season one. Personally, I trust Jared Padalecki to understand Sam best, and he's said that Sam's happiest moment was committing to getting back on the road with his brother--despite the fact that back then, Sam's assumption was that he would return to his normal life after they found Jess's killer. Jared has also said something to the effect of "Sam loved his father and brother so much he had to leave" which definitely reframes his decision to go to Stanford--because of, rather than in spite of, his love. How to make sense of these statements? They only track if Sam really is just as smitten (in the platonic sense) as Dean. In spite of whatever resentment he had towards Dean, he loved him (keep in mind, the deeper the love, the deeper the potential resentment) and, importantly, liked him, and was intrinsically tangled up in him. Everything Sam does and says makes perfect sense if you accept that Sam loved his family, but hated hunting. Of course he's upset that the father and brother he loves and needs go out and risk their lives all the time. He's right to be. And of course he would be especially upset that his brother doesn't even try to imagine a different life for himself, that he takes their father's word as law despite the damage it does to Dean. And, when Sam finally does leave, it hurts him that Dean doesn't try to understand his decision because it would shake Dean to his foundations to consider that Sam might be right, let alone to consider following him out of the life (as I believe Sam would have preferred, though he probably knew it was a lost cause). Dean can only see it as Sam abandoning him, even though for Sam it was always about leaving hunting, never about leaving his brother. Sam wanted nothing more than his brother on his side, by his side, and it broke his heart when Dean seemed to choose John over Sam. The tragedy of the Stanford split is that Sam and Dean each thought their worst fear was confirmed--for Dean, that Sam didn't need him, and for Sam, that Dean hated him--even though this really wasn't the case.

So, why this digression about the old Stanford grievance and the boys' headspaces in the pilot? Because I wish so much we got to see how they got there--and the flashback episodes, for the most part, do not show us. In fact, there's a frustrating pattern of flashbacks that don't really corroborate this textually-supported characterization of young Sam and Dean. Almost universally, the flashbacks concentrate on the brothers in isolation from each other, either physically or emotionally (or both). That's not to say that they're all bad episodes or that they don't reveal other important information about Sam and Dean. It does, however, give an overall skewed impression of their "normal" as kids, and presents something of a paradox in considering the Winchesters' childhood. We see, textually, that the brothers must have been extremely attached to each other growing up, beyond just Dean's sense of duty to look after Sammy (which is hammered home again and again, and again...), but this isn't the impression most flashbacks give. Let's take a closer look:

1x18 Something Wicked--Sam is too young to be much of player. It's all about Dean and his sacrifices/responsibility for Sam--all important stuff, but aside from Sam offering Dean the prize in the cereal box, there isn't much evidence of actual affection between them. Dean appears only put upon--fair enough for a young kid given such (way too much!) responsibility, but it's to the complete exclusion of any potential positive emotion, even fondness, for Sam.

3x08 A Very Supernatural Christmas--This flashback is the exception, and it's why it's my favorite! This was a crucial moment for the brothers in their young lives, when they chose each other over anyone else. Sam trusts Dean, not his father. Dean tries to put on a nice Christmas for Sam because he feels it's his job, yes, but he then experiences genuine gratitude when Sam gives him the pendant. They lean on each other. They comfort each other. In short, we see the why and the how of their relationship. I wish every flashback accomplished what this one does.

4x13 After School Special--The focus is mostly on Sam and his relationship with Barry and that English teacher, with a big emphasis on Sam's dissatisfaction with his life. That's super important, but I can't think of any moment between Sam and Dean that reads like anything other than pretty average brothers... which they are decidedly not. The episode drives home the diverging desires of the brothers more than anything.

5x16 Dark Side of the Moon--Not strictly a flashback episode, but we do glimpse important memories in Sam and Dean's heaven. Dean's 4th of July memory is iconic for a reason--it's one of those rare moments we really see why these brothers feel the way they do about each other. They're having actual fun together--the only time we get to see young Winchesters doing that! We all know which of Sam's memories were in heaven, though, and how that made Dean feel. Now, it makes sense that Sam would cherish moments when he was getting away from The Life, but the fact that the writers again chose to prioritize this (beat a dead horse, one could say), over showing a single good memory Sam had of the family he supposedly (actually, really!) loves, feels wrong and motivated solely by the plot's need for more artificial brother drama. Could anyone really blame a casual viewer for believing that Sam doesn't love his brother as much as Dean loves him? And yes, one can make excuses--Sam probably had lots of heaven memories of Dean that weren't shown! Zachariah was messing with them!--but it's still on the writers to make that clear.

5x23 Swan Song--I'm including this one for the flashes we get of little Sam and Dean in the Impala. These are beautiful moments, but it amounts to telling, not showing: we get toy soldiers and legos, and a brief shot of Sam and Dean carving their initials. What we don't see is the impetus behind that action. We are essentially told how to feel about these things. (Don't get me wrong, I think it's still a really well done episode and I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel exactly what it wanted me to feel--I'm just pointing out a pattern.)

7x03 The Girl Next Door--Dean is only present as a voice on the other end of a phone call (do we even hear him? Can't remember. Don't think so). Oh, and Sam has doubts, yet again, about hunting monsters. Hm, I think we've been here before. Sam has an instant connection with a girl he just met and he seems ready to put her before his family. I get that he doesn't want her to die, which is sympathetic. But again, one would be forgiven for thinking he does not care about--or even actively hates--both John and Dean. Maybe he does hate them a little bit in this moment, and wouldn't that be interesting to explore? (Cue Jared saying Sam had to leave because he loved John and Dean so much! He couldn't stand the thought of it all turning to resentment! It makes so much sense!) But, alas, the episode just doesn't go there.

9x07 Bad Boys--This time it's the Dean show, and we get to see Dean finding happiness away from his family, even if he needs some time to warm to the apple pie life. Okay, cool to know this about Dean. And the moment at the end is interesting, and gratifying for brothers fans, since Dean doesn't seem pulled back out of a mere sense of grudging obligation to Sam--he gives such a genuine, loving smile when he sees him. He wants to go back to Sam. But it's just a gesture, telling rather than showing again. We don't know why Sam makes him feel that way.

11x08 Just My Imagination--The only brother interaction, over the phone, doesn't reveal much about how the brothers feel about each other, though it does hint that Dean would ultimately come down on their father's side when John and Sam were at odds. Dean asks John, on Sam's request, to bring Sam along on a hunt, but he doesn't press the issue when John refuses. If anything, this leaves me more curious than ever about what the good in their relationship looked like, if Sam was so often disappointed by Dean's kowtowing to their father.

Sully seems a bit like English Teacher 2.0, encouraging young Sam to figure out what he wants for himself and reject the family business. I think it's quite well done and sweet, actually, and it's nice that in the end Sully actually thanks adult Dean for looking after Sam (how rare for anyone to acknowledge that), and Dean likewise comes to appreciate Sully. In the flashbacks, we learn that Sam was eager to join in hunts when he was little, which is interesting and sad when you think about how that changed. Already, though, he must feel pretty ambivalent, because he's seriously considering running away at the same time. Ultimately, Sam chooses his family--articulating that what he wants is to be with his dad and Dean--and rejects Sully's message of self-determination. He makes the decision that may not be best for him, but he's motivated by love. It seems in character, and hints at the claustrophobic pull of the Winchester family. Yet again, though, we are left to fill in the blanks ourselves about why Sam wants to be with his dad and Dean. In fact, the motivations for his two apparently conflicting desires--to stay or run away--are never very clearly laid out. We don't know what, specifically, Sam doesn't like about the hunting life, when part of him also wants to hunt, and we don't know what it is about his family--what good memories, desires, or needs--that draws him back to it.

15x16 Drag Me Away (From You)--It's unfortunate that the young actors had no chemistry whatsoever, but the script also didn't do them any favors as far as displaying their dynamic. Dean has a moment of vulnerability (if you squint) over Sam thinking about college, but aside from that, it's almost amazing how little the brothers interact, given that they're staying in a motel together, on their own. What a missed opportunity. Can you imagine if the episode had focused even a little more on Sam and Dean, rather than on their interactions with those other random kids? If it had given us just a fraction of the relationship "A Very Supernatural Christmas" managed to show in such an understated, poignant way? You wouldn't know these brothers liked or loved each other from this episode. When Dean said "We made a good team" I was honestly baffled because they barely did anything together. You could argue Dean was reaching with that statement because he was desperate, but again, there's nothing actually shown to back that up.

Ultimately, what these flashbacks show can all be true--it doesn't negate what we know about Sam and Dean from the show's present. Of course, like any brothers, they teased and annoyed the hell out of each other. Of course they had vastly diverging desires for themselves and their lives--that's sort of the premise of the show and characters in the early seasons. These aspects of their relationship are true, but these aspects are not the whole story, which is why it's frustrating that almost every flashback focuses exclusively on these things. From the flashbacks alone, you might think Dean is only about "protect Sammy" (and later, "order Sammy around") and Sam is only about "I hate my life (and by extension, family)." Most of us could tell all along--and the finale confirms--that there's another story underneath this one, though, of two brothers who are soulmates, destined to find each other like magnets again and again.

But this requires the astute viewer to do a lot of legwork in characterizing the brothers' childhood dynamic beyond what's shown--partly as a result of some logistical and practical issues (especially with child actors), to be sure, but mostly of lazy writing. There's a difference between respecting your audience's intelligence enough not to spoon-feed them every detail, and expecting them to pick up the slack and make excuses when your characterization and plotting is inconsistent or one-note. This is far from the most egregious example of this in Supernatural, but the finale had me thinking more closely about what is canon for the pre-series era, and it drove home how much it applies to the flashbacks.

So what would I have liked to have seen? What it comes down to is interaction between the brothers. The only flashback where we have both brothers in equal focus, interacting with each other rather than outside characters, is "A Very Supernatural Christmas." It's impossible to show the progression and significance of a relationship when you consistently show only one side of it at a time (or don't even focus on said relationship when both parties are in the same room--looking at you, 15x16). Sam and Dean are the heart of the show, and they should have--together--been the heart of the majority of flashbacks. It's not that Sam wasn't a lonely kid, but as Dean says to Sam in "Just My Imagination": "You had me!" Of course, Dean's memory is skewed--he isn't thinking about all the times he went off with John on a hunt and left Sam behind, and hell, even when Dean was supposed to be babysitting, we know from "Plucky Pennywhistle's Magical Menagerie" that he sometimes dumped Sam. But I can't believe that Dean is totally wrong, either. Sam and Dean must have been each other's best--only--friends, living the life they did. What we see rarely looks like friendship, and it certainly doesn't track as a basis for the codependency we see in the series present, starting with the pilot. That didn't come from nowhere, though.

I would have loved to have seen that first hunt Sam went on in Milwaukee, after he left Sully. I would have loved to have seen Dean, proud of his little brother becoming a hunter. Or Dean, looking out for Sam on a hunt (and treating Sam's peril like a bigger deal than he does in 15x16, where it barely phases him). I wish I'd seen the moment that made Sam reject a future as a hunter, after his initial excitement. Did something happen on a hunt? Was it the violence of it? The brutality against a monster with a human face? Or the peril? Was there a moment when Sam's life was in danger? Or perhaps, a moment when John's or Dean's was, that scared Sam even more? I wish I'd seen Sam grappling with how leaving hunting would mean leaving the family he loves. I wish I'd seen him mention it to Dean, try just once to convince him to try a different life, and get shot down. I wish I'd seen more of the Dean who wants to give Sammy the world, struggling with the increasingly impossible task of balancing Sam's wants and needs with John's orders. Dean, caught in the middle of their arguments and torn apart by it. Sam, hurt when Dean doesn't back him up. Dean, terrified that Sam might actually follow through with that college pipe dream. Perhaps all of this would have been indulgent (not to mention difficult to film, with the right child actors and JDM), but even part of it would have allowed for some nuanced characterization.

More than anything, though, I would have liked to have seen a few more of the good memories, because they are actually important to understanding the characters and the story. It's not about fluff; it's about showing rather than telling. What are the good memories that made Sam love Dean and even his dad? Sam's anger towards their father is all the more compelling and believable if there is a fierce love underneath the layers of resentment and betrayal. And you know what's even more sad than a kid whose dad didn't make it home for X occasion? A kid whose dad did come home, just once, and the kid who enshrines that one perfect memory because they don't realize how messed up it is that it's such a rarity. Or, if it wasn't John making it home for one holiday, maybe it was the one time Sam remembers getting John's approval in some way--it could be any number of small things. The good that a character holds onto, no matter how small a scrap, says a lot about them. And the same goes for Sam and Dean. Where was Sam the social outcast, wanting but struggling to fit in, grateful that at least he doesn't have to put on a pretense of normality around his brother? Dean, feeling the same, though he'd never admit it? Dean, talking Sam up rather than tearing him down? How they felt safe, comfortable, only with each other? Even if they both had to act a certain way to earn the other's approval or admiration, that act must have felt worth it for the reward. Where was the Sam that looked up to and tried to emulate Dean, and the Dean that cherished that more than anything? Where were the moments of fun, the contentment Dean felt when he managed to put a smile on Sammy's face? The small acts of rebellion that united them, however briefly, against both their father and the world? The fireworks scene has to do so much heavy lifting all on its own, in the face of all the flashbacks that repeatedly give the opposite impression.

People are complex, of course, and we're fortunate to have two such complex characters as Sam and Dean. Both the good and the bad of their childhood, and their relationship with each other, are true, but the writers chose to emphasize one side much more than the other when it came to the flashbacks. As much as I'm a believer in the power of the audience's imagination and of transformative works, it is still up to the writers to guide that imagination in a certain way. Unfortunately, in the case of the flashbacks, that guidance is off-track and unbalanced at best, and negligent misguidance at worst. The story of Sam and Dean only makes sense with a more balanced picture. It only works if it really is about two brothers who love each other more than anything. It only makes sense if there's much more to their childhood relationship than we were shown. Now that the series is over, we won't be getting any more flashbacks (unless prequel series? Unlikely haha), so we're left to fill in these gaping blanks on our own. At least the finale gave us some good crumbs to work with.