#we are all better than this

[tavyliasin]

Boundaries and Parasocial Relationships (I will only say this once)

This is the ONLY post I will be making on the matter, so please feel free to skip if you do not want to hear it again, and don't worry you don't need to hide me to avoid discourse - the rest of my content will remain firmly with only SMUTFIC FAN FUN.

So let's start with the simple. Actors, performers, celebrities: They are PEOPLE with LIVES. They are not CHARACTERS. Paying them for a service does not include the right to cross their boundaries. Just like tipping someone working food service does not give you a pass to harrass them either.

If you feel the need to request something smutty from an actor/celebrity, STOP. THINK. THIS IS WHAT FAN CREATORS ARE HERE FOR!

I'm not saying that you can act inappropriately towards fan creators, I'm saying that those of us making NSFW content are already prepared to hear the horny requests, the thirst comments towards the characters on our posts, the headcanons and self inserts and all of that. Of course you should never expect a creator to make your ideas into fic or art, and asking politely is always preferred. Whilst fic writers generally cannot take paid commissions, artists can and do, so you should also consider commissioning what you want to see and never expect art for free. Sometimes we hear a good idea, though, and get really inspired! We draw or write it because we hear it and thing "well yes darling actually that's very hot" or even "that sounds like a challenge, it could be fun!"

For anyone still confused about what is appropriate or not, please read this article about Parasocial Relationships

It is important to recognise for your own mental health when fandom is going too far, and to keep the right boundaries for everyone. It is very easy to get carried away with excitement, especially when some performers might share a few risqué pieces of art or content, but when they're sharing it like that it is on their terms, on their time. Making requests during a live stream or through cameo is not the same. I'd also add to think before sharing any NSFW art, fic, or other creations directly to performers - if they haven't asked for it don't send it. Don't tag them in it, either - they have families, careers, and may not want to be as visibly linked to literal porn. If they're looking for that content and want to see it, they will find it. That also applies to sharing other peoples' NSFW creations to the performers or tagging them in replies - unless they specifically state they want to see the content, don't.

FINAL NOTE

This fan community has so much potential. We have proven we can be awarded "Community of the Year". We can love and support one another, we can keep each other safe, we can be a rock in the storm and the cheerleading squad that each other need in so many situations. Let's keep it that way. Be kind, to each other and to the performers. Remember, the words on the screen are not written by unfeeling robots, we are all very real people with thoughts and emotions and lives. Now go out there. Make the world a brighter place, and keep creating the fan content we all love so very dearly, darlings, but do it right.

SAFE, SANE, CONSENTING. Check in on the safety, mental health, and boundaries in all of your interactions.

And one last time, to learn more about parasocial relationships and how to handle interactions with famous people:

Click Here for the full article.

[ered]

Here’s my take on the whole audio books vs. reading:

Oral tradition of storytelling predates written ones by millennias, and honestly, which one you like is just a personal preference.

The actual difference is

when listening, you have no idea how to write characters’ names

when reading, you have no idea how to pronounce characters’ names

hope this helps!

[mejkosmos]

so funny how the whole gravity falls fandom immediately went from "bill cipher-all interdimensional being hot tumblr sexy man" to "bill cipher- lame loser pathetic fumbler toxic skrunkly sad ex" in a matter of seconds as SOON as the rise of billford came about

[pickled-flowers]

Sex positivity is also about not calling Ace people prude and using virgin as an insult 👍 hope that helps

[teaboot]

Sometimes at work it's not my place to tell people the things I want to say, and I find I often go home at the end of the rougher days to stand blankly in my shower and tell myself over and over what I wish I could pass on.

This accomplishes very little, and mostly just gives me a tension headache, but through it all I think I've narrowed myself down to a few solid things I'd like to tell people the most.

You can't change people. Not permanently, not for anythig. You can support them, encourage them, love them, give them tools and opportunities and resources, but you can't make them change. They can change themselves if they want to, but they have to want to, and they have to want it for themselves, because they're the only one that's certain to be with them forever.

For better or worse, you make your own choices, and blaming bad choices on others doesn't only work to absolve you of responsibility- it also robs you of control. Because if you say you only did something because I did something, then you arent only shifting blame- you're admitting that you cannot control yourself, that you cannot truly make choices for yourself, that other people can control you- and as long as you truly beleive that, you'll keep facing the same problems over and over. You'll keep letting others dictate your choices, because you'll beleive that they can, and you'll never be free.

White knights on horseback are from fairytales. Nobody can help you if ou're not willing to help yourself. To try, to put the dirty work in, to belive you're worth that effort- Act as though nobody is coming to save you. From a struggle, from pain, from bad relationships, from yourself. And when you do save yourself, because you will, because failure here isn't an option if you want to survive, you'll never find another dragon that can keep you prisoner.

Don't say anything to anyone that you wouldn't want them remembering forever.

Doing the right thing in bad circumstances is hard. It's the hardest thing. But if you make the choice to do that hard thing anyways, despite your fear, you'll go on the rest of your like knowing that you're the sort of person who did something.

The present only seems the hardest because the past I over and the future hasn't happened.

There's so much joy ahead of you, the kind you can't possibly understand until you see it yourself.

The responsibility of consequences is often disguised as the power of permission. "I won't do this if you help me", "I'll work on my anger if you do this for me", "I promised you I'd quit, but can I have just one?". The unspoken question is, "Can it be your fault if this goes badly?"

You cant make someone love you the way you need to be loved. Someone can love you very much and still be bad for you, even if you love them very much in return. Two people can love each other very, very much, and try their very best, and still be wrong for each other.

Sometimes being near to someone changes you, even in good ways, and the people you become don't fit together as well as the people you were.

Caring takes work. Even if it's real. Especially if it's real. And the most important gestures aren't the grand, poetic, songs-and-flowers-and-tears moments; they're getting out of bed even though you don't want to. Paying attention to things you don't enjoy. Scrubbing pans, or opening a window, saying "thank-you", or helping carry groceries into the house. The small things fill the big things- without the small, boring, mediocre things, big things feel hollow.

Thrre is honour and dignity in humble work.

If you are a cruel and spiteful person, then you will find every place you visit to be full of the same cruel, spiteful people. This is not because the world is as cruel as you, but because everywhere you are, you will be disliked. This is the curse that comes with being persistently cruel and spiteful.

If you are a kind and ppsitive person, you will repeatedly encounter kind and positive people, because as they grow familiar with you, they will be happier to have you near. This is the reward of being a kind and positive person.

When splitting paths with loved ones, briefly or forever, aim for your last words to always be "I love you".

[egophiliac]

LET THE BOY HAVE AN EDUCATION

officially at the point where we're starting to see where it's all headed and I am just going NYEEHEEHEE in delight at it all. ahhh...next week can't come soon enough...

[youchangedmedestiel]

Imo the best ending to Supernatural would have been to just stop with them alive on a random hunt or them finding jobs and living the life they just wanted or whatever.

And then the story just fucking STOP, because Chuck is not here anymore, so they are no longer part of a story they are finally free. And we could still write and read fanfic about how they live after they won.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

world's longest staring contest GO-

[aliosne]

Saw a post about working class butches in physical labour jobs and wanted to make my own, so: I love you butches who do childcare or early education. I love you butch nurses. I love you butch house cleaners and janitorial staff. I love you service industry butches. I love you butches who do sex work. I love you working class butches who do “feminine” jobs you are cool as hell

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Heh...Literally nothing personal, kid.

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[blujayonthewing]

awright here we go

[mcr-heritage-posts]

hey everyone - i know there’s a lot going on in the world right now, a lot of causes that need support and visibility now more than ever.

i’d like to take an opportunity to highlight a cause that’s very literally close to home for me: i live very, very close to springfield, ohio. the haitian community there has always needed help and support but now, with white supremacist rhetoric and bold faced lies being circulated nationally, with threats of violence and heightened ignorance being more common than ever, they need it perhaps more than they ever have.

there has been a lot of hate since trump and his little bootlicker attack dog jd vance have started this shit, but there’s also been an outpouring of love and community outreach in the weeks since springfield was thrust into the worst kind of spotlight.

the hatian community support and help center has been invaluable in helping hatian refugees get what they need to start a new life here. they are headed by a team of haitian immigrants that are personally familiar with what their fellow immigrants need. they have been instrumental in keeping their community from falling through the cracks.

i’m humbly asking, if any of you can - please, please consider donating to the HCSHC. every bit helps. and if you can’t donate, please, please share this around. if you’ve ever reblogged one of my posts or found them funny, if you’ve ever scrolled through and liked and reblogged what i’ve put here, i implore you to share this too. this is a very personal cause for me; i want to see these people who are new here, who enrich our community but are met with too much derision and spite, receive the help, respect, and dignity they deserve.

[xxplastic-cubexx]

oh boy 2AM !!!!!!

[holyblanchett]

There's just something about Kathryn saying Agathario goes back hundreds of years that is so special to me.

[giddlygoat]

i’ve seen people draw guck with a scar on his temple from the memory gun. i wanted to adopt that hc asap

[racewinnerlandonorris]

it actually really bothers me how it was always “daniel to red bull” now it’s “liam to red bull” but it’s never once been “yuki to red bull” when he’s been driving the life out of that car for years