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syrupfog · 1 month ago

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Sanji was not born a natural fighter.

He, very specifically, was NOT born with the superhuman fighting abilities of his siblings. He was born normal. Weak. Useless. He knows this.

Zeff taught him to fight and Sanji practised. Learned. Grew. But the natural talent wasn't there.

When Luffy picked him up, added him to the crew, Sanji knew it was for his cooking abilities.

But he knew that being on the crew of the future King of the Pirates meant he couldn’t just be the best cook on the Grand Line. He had to be able to fight, too.

And that’s where Zoro came in. Zoro, who scoffed at him from day one. Who liked his cooking well enough but didn’t seem to care much for Sanji as a person.

Sanji was pretty confident he knew why. Zoro knew they needed to be strong, and Sanji— he wasn’t strong enough.

He didn’t think he ever would be— he was too normal. Born normal. But he TRIES. On the Merry before everyone wakes up and after they go to sleep, between preparing meals. He sets himself a brutal training regimen.

He’ll train until Zoro stopped giving him that scathing look.

They get Nami back from Arlong Park and Sanji finds himself limping to the after party. Zoro takes one look at how he’s favouring his foot and scowls.

In Little Garden Zoro straight up challenges him and Sanji revels in the ability to prove himself. It doesn’t work. They tie.

At Drum Sanji gets injured. He’s too weak too weak too weak— he barely gets Nami help in time, it’s his fault she almost—

He’s strapped down and his spine fixed and all he can think is that Zoro is right. He doesn’t deserve this role.

People have started calling them the wings of the pirate king. Fucking laughable. Sanji could never be on Zoro’s level and Zoro knows it.

They fight. They blow off steam. It helps Sanji to cool down, to gauge what level he’s at. He knows Zoro’s holding back.

He thinks, for a moment, that he has finally moved up a rung in Skypeia. He’s getting better.

All it takes is one moment when he’s changing. For Zoro to spot the marks from the lightning that litter his back. That angry scowl that sets his features makes Sanji’s heart sink.

He takes his frustration out on the Davy Back fight. He tantrums like a child for Zoro’s respect even when he knows he hasn’t earned it, can’t earn it.

It sort of works, though.

Everything goes to shit in Water 7 and for once it’s kinda nice to know he’s not the one fucking up. Not that he would tell Usopp that. He plans good spicy pasta for his return.

He fights a ramen man with knives on the train and thanks the stars that Zoro isn’t there to see it.

(After all, Sanji doesn’t fight with his hands— he doesn’t want Zoro to lose the last of his respect for Sanji by seeing him break with his own ideals).

They get out of Water 7 with a new crew member. He’s a cyborg. He’s strong.

Then Thriller Bark happens. Thriller Bark sucks.

Zoro just— he just pushes him aside.

He knows Sanji can’t handle it. He knows he’s too weak. And it’s true but it HURTS. Sanji’s tried so HARD he’s trained for so LONG he’s tried to balance fighting and cooking as best he can, he barely SLEEPS—

And Zoro pushes him aside.

He takes the damage.

He almost dies.

That should’ve been Sanji.

Sanji hates him for it.

He hates himself for it.

He sits in the infirmary and stares past Zoro’s mangled form and wonders what he’s supposed to do now.

They get to Saboady.

Sanji doesn’t see any of them for two years.

Zoro looks good. He looks strong. He’s missing an eye.

After two years, Sanji can admit that he had been desperate for Zoro’s approval for more than one reason.

He sees Zoro’s face light up when Luffy appears and he thinks, so selfishly, that he wants that look too.

Fishman Island isn’t a great start.

Punk Hazard is— well.

Zoro doesn’t scowl at him when he’s in Nami’s body, his expression is DIFFERENT. Pained. Sanji doesn’t know why. He doesn’t like it.

Then he’s back in his own body and Zoro’s scowl is back and Sanji—

He’s sick of it.

He’s so so sick of it.

He spends what feels like hours running back and forth in this hellhole of a lab with poison gas invading his lungs and fucking Vergo attacking him and the next time that Sanji sees Zoro once everything is over, he’s busy doling out soup to the masses.

They like his soup, because he’s a good cook. Because he spent two years learning secret recipes and two years training harder than ever before and Zoro still has the gall to scowl at him like he doesn’t want to share the same air.

Sanji snaps.

He hands off the ladle to Franky

He walks over and aims a kick at Zoro’s head.

Zoro ducks.

He parries the next kick.

Sanji is relentless. He’s yelling. Insults, obscenities. Their fighting empties out their half of the room. Zoro works all the way up to three swords, breathing hard.

They only stop when Nami throws a weather attack at them and yells to take it outside. Cowed, Sanji calms down enough to slip out he door.

He’s surprised, honestly, when Zoro follows him.

“You gonna tell me what that was about?” Zoro asks.

“Shut up.”

Zoro scowls at him.

Sanji snaps his teeth. “That! That’s what this is about! That fucking face!”

Zoro blinks. “You’re mad at my face?” “Yeah! I fucking am! You keep— you’ve ALWAYS looked at me with that fucking face! Like I’m fucking BENEATH YOU!”

Zoro blinks again. His scowl, briefly, disappears, replaced with confusion. “I don’t think you’re fucking beneath me,” he says, sounding bewildered.

Sanji pauses. “What— is your face just stuck like that?”

Zoro’s face drops back into a scowl. “Shut up,” he says. “Maybe I’m just annoyed by you.”

Annoyed.

Well. That does hurt. The part of Sanji that has realised by now just how much he wants something more than just approval from the swordsman. It… sorta hurts that he doesn’t trust him as a fighter AND doesn’t like him as a person.

“Oh,” he says.

Zoro’s eyebrows knit together. “Hold on,” he says. “What the fuck.”

“…What?”

“You think I don’t like you because you’re, what, not competent?”

“I’m competent,” Sanji lies.

“Yeah,” Zoro says. “I know.”

What?

Sanji peers at him. “You… know?”

“We’re the strongest people on Luffy’s crew. Of course I know.”

Sanji’s not strong. He’s never been strong. “No we’re not,” he says.

“I mean obviously I mean besides Luffy.”

“I— that’s not what I meant.” Sanji tugs absentmindedly on his hair. It’s fucking cold here.

“So you don’t hate me because I’m weak… you just hate me because I’m annoying,” he intones.

Zoro looks at him like he has two heads. “I don’t hate you Cook, fucking hell.”

Sanji throws his hands up, face hot. “Then what is your problem with me? You’ve always done this, always given me this— this LOOK when we’re fighting people—“

“You’re coughing,” Zoro says.

“…Excuse me?”

“You got some of that poison gas in your lungs. Not a lot, but enough that you’re affected.”

“Fine. I fucked up—“

“I should’ve been faster,” Zoro says.

Sanji blinks. “Been faster at what?”

“Clearing the area. I should’ve gone after that fucking clown.”

“You had a job to do—“

“Every time I’m too slow, people get hurt. You get hurt.”

Sanji scoffs. “We can protect ourselves. We’re all in Luffy’s crew.”

“But you shouldn’t have to,” Zoro says, hand gripping his swords.

“You’re the fucking cook, that’s your job. It’s my job to keep you safe.”

“I’m a pirate, I’m just as capable—“

Zoro growls, shoulders hunching up. “It’s not about being CAPABLE, FUCK, SANJI OF COURSE YOU’RE CAPABLE. But it’s my job.” He starts pacing.

“Those scars on your back from the lightning are still there in the right light. That scar from Drum island too. I’d known you for two days before you ended up covered in fishman blood to the point I wasn’t sure if you had just killed someone or were actively dying.”

He stops suddenly, turning and grasping Sanji’s upper arms, that scowl firmly in place as he stares into Sanji’s eye. “Every time you get hurt? That’s MY failure. My ONLY job on this crew is to keep people SAFE.”

Sanji stands rigid, keeping eye contact. “Zoro,” he says.

Zoro drops his arms as if burned.

“Zoro,” Sanji says again. “Mosshead. You’re not in this alone.”

“My job is swords,” Zoro mutters.

Sanji, despite himself, barks out a raw laugh. “And here I spent the last two and a half years thinking you just hated how weak I was.”

“You keep saying that,” Zoro says, looking utterly baffled. “You’re not weak. You’ve never been weak.”

Sanji thinks of metal weighing his head down, of dark dungeons and rats.

He thinks about Zeff teaching him. About his flaming kicks. “…Huh,” is all he says.

Then, because he’s not weak, he reaches out and grabs onto Zoro’s robe. “You don’t hate me. You don’t think I’m weak.”

“I’m not going to keep upping your ego,” Zoro growls.

Sanji pulls him in by his robe and— he doesn’t kiss him. He knocks their foreheads together.

“Shit, ow,” Zoro groans.

Sanji breathes against his skin. “Mosshead,” he says. “Why do you scowl at me and no one else?”

There’s silence for a while. Sanji can feel his eyelashes when he blinks.

“It’s because you’re annoying as fuck,” Zoro says.

And then he surges up to kiss him.

Sanji welcomes it.

It’s a kiss with a lot of teeth and too much heat and the taste of cheap sake.

It’s just what Sanji needed.

Maybe it’s just what Zoro needed.

Sanji can feel him scowling into the kiss and it feels like a promise.

#zosan #my writing

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yanmuffins · 4 days ago

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asks 2.

context.

here are some more asks i'm replying to in a bulk about phineas and ferb reader!!

my favorite part in dc. vs vampires is when reader comes together with damian and damian to build a silly machine that un-vampifies people in like half a day so they can defeat the vampire king. it is canon.

@amethystjellyfish

perry really is reader's number #1 stan. they're his family, reader's had him since he was a small platypus baby!

he does his best to keep reader safe, which is why he doesn't like the batfam much. he keeps it professional on the rare occasions they go on missions together, but that's it. he hates how dismissive of reader they are in the beginning, and he hates them later on when they star showering them with attention because they found out about their inventions.

not tired, anon! i love seeing people enjoy my concepts and interact with them!! ദ്ദി(˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧

and i'm sure this has happened. more than once, actually. the power of coincidence is strong with reader. the life-saving laser beam comes from a situation involving reader's latest machine they built and tested with the help of jon.

unfortunately, one of his lasers richochets on the machine during testing, not only causing it to save batfamily's life, caught in a dangerous situation in a completely different location, but also destroys the machine so there's nothing to link it to reader.

ah, well. they'll just have to keep looking.

reader, seeing them run past her: oh! there's perry :)

i love how we have established tim is terrified of this platypus. nevermind the other pets in the manor, it's the platypus with its googly eyes that drives him insane. they don't get it, he got up to drink water at 3 a.m. and the thing was just there, looking at him. menacingly.

jason would though. meanwhile, perry is wishing he could just go back to metropolis. he didn't have to deal with reader's siblings in metropolis. he doesn't get enough hazard pay for this.

hm... good question!

i like to think that, much like with phineas and ferb, luck is on reader's side most of the time, so i don't see reader getting injured by their own inventions.

but, let's suppose they do: it's a nice sunday afternoon, the batfam has decided to gather around the living room and hang out, watch a movie, lots of popcorn and soda. they don't have to think about criminals or fighting, tim and damian are bickering, jason is around, peace reigns the manor.

until they hear an explosion. they run to the garage only to find reader on the floor, unconscious, bleeding, and an assortment of destroyed metal components to a machine they can't decipher. damian doesn't even feel good about reader finally being busted.

later, when reader is back home, awake and out of risk but with a bandage around their head and their leg in a cast, they're in for the biggest (and probably first) scolding of their entire lives. reader tries to play it off. it wasn't that big of a deal, they're fine, aren't they? and they're genuinely optimistic about it. but the entire family is talking over each other at first, until bruce signals for everyone to shut up and leave the room. he has a very serious talk with reader, and makes it very clear they're not to come near a toolbox ever again.

but he understands. it's partly his fault for not being attentive. he won't make that mistake again.

ofc reader is really upset. dick comes next, then stephanie, then cass, then duke, then barbara and they all try to convince reader in a much more amiable tone that hey, it's fine. who needs to do all that whacky stuff to have fun? just hang out with us. they can get another hobby, and this time they can make it a family thing! how's that sound? not fun? don't be like that... they're sure reader will come around.

tim is pretty much the only one who congratulates them for being awesome pulling all those stunts, one per day, it's impressive. but now it's time to step back a bit. who knows? try being careful and bruce will let you work with a welding tool again. one day. maybe.

damian and jason's reactions are more similar to bruce's. in other circumstances, damian is on reader's side and helps them sneak around to continue their shenanigans, but in the case of reader getting hurt he just wants them to not do that. any of that. ever again. and jason has to hold himself back not to snap and ask them what the hell were they thinking?! they could have died! he ends up just telling them to quit it. they're just a kid who shouldn't be messing around with that sort of stuff.

anon, i wouldn't go as far as say he'd use venom against them, but he's bit batfam before. as stated, he does not dig their vibe at all!

anon, that's a great idea! though i think p&f! reader is much too motivated by the creative process and experience that their inventions bring more than just willing them to come to life.

they have the power to create whatever they want, but what's the fun of it? what about hte process? the building? the friends they make along the way? the memories? i think reader would find the ring awesome at first, but the novelty would wear of in less than a week.

anon...

because i dig the idea of reader being friends with dipper and mabel. reader talks about their crazy inventions, and loves hearing about all the cryptids they came across during vacation.

reader invites the twins to the manor, they share their most recent summer memories. reader talks about that one time they built and drove a massive monster truck with their brother damian, but jason only comes into the room in time to hear about dipper and mable talk about the weirdmaggedon. he has several question marks around his head. aren't those kids a a little too old to be making shit up? or maybe... no, there's no way. or is there? no... he would have heard about this... but weirder things have happened. but what if...

@randomlyappearingartist

you are so right. to be honest, i don't even think the batfam would even know of his existence, since he's pretty much a very minor villain acting in metropolis. after perry joins the league, or in the rare occasion of dr. doof teaming up with another minor gotham villian like condiment man, is when they get to know he exists.

and since perry seems to have him under control, they don't even acknowledge the guy.

i love love love this sm!

they assume it's just flash mobs. it's got to be. flash mobs with really weird themes, like an entire musical number dedicated to the squirrels in damian's pants. that was strange. bruce patrolling in the middle of the night and this new crime lord just burst into a song with a band and hired back dancers, because it's apparently a new trend a minor villain in metropolis started.

and what about that one time dick took damian (and reader) to the library and some guy just started singing about how he doesn't have rhythm? and damian just started playing a trumpet? and reader started singing? i mean, it was a bop and he started dancing, but it was weird anyway.

but now i'm thinking of damian and reader singing the "summer" song together (he sings the "it's noticeably warmer" and that's it) though! wholesome.

@lazyandannoyng

not annoying at all! you're good ⸜(˙꒳˙ )

i have this little idea in my head that reader doesn't take the wayne name when find out bruce is their dad and move to gotham, and bruce is pretty secretive about this new kid of his for purely privacy and safety reasons. so when reader does their networking, it's often not obvious they're a wayne. not sure if this will make it into the fic, but it really resonates with this concept!

it's also funny to think that a lot of people don't even know reader and the waynes are related. even if they do know reader is related to the batfam, nobody really talks about them by name (just "your sibling"), and all of those little details like never asking about where the gloves came from (because why would he) or the misunderstandings where one party means one thing and the other assumes it's another (dick has many siblings! too many!) just end up helping reader not get caught. and i just think that's neat.

#asks.#anonymous.#long post.#yandere batfam #yandere batfamily #neglected reader #platonic yandere batfam

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