#was having some feels today
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The Quiet In Between (post Crisis Guardiancorp)
James would expect to see Lena at Noonan’s. He would expect to see her in a five star restaurant, or a trendy new bar with low, smooth music. He doesn’t expect to find her in National City’s greasiest diner.
It’s also grungy, and dingy and the farthest cry from anything befitting a Luthor. Especially in this reality. He frowns. It still unsettles him, that there was once a world that was, one vastly different from the world that is. But in this world, where the Luthors had never fallen and Lena had no reason to mingle with the smallfolk like she did after meeting Kara, Lena seems even more out of place in the cracked and peeling pleather booth.
If Lena is surprised to see him when he approaches her table, it doesn’t show. She has nothing but a coffee in front of her, but at 2am the place is sparse and not wanting for open tables.
“Hey Lena,” he says, settling onto the bench opposite her. “Been a while.”
Her eyebrows shrug in affirmation. “Yeah.”
He waits a few beats, but her demeanor remains distant.
“How are you?” James asks in a gentle voice.
Lena doesn’t meet his gaze. She stares out through the window at the night beyond, eyes fixed on nothing in particular. “Lex is alive,” she says flatly. “In a world of his own making. Where nothing is the same except that my friends aren’t my friends. So. You know.” Her shoulders lift. “Fine.”
He regards her solemnly. He knows Lena Luthor. He knows her moods and her faces and her tones. He’s never seen her like this. Never so… detached. Defeated.
“It’s not ideal,” he agrees carefully. “But I’ve never known you to sit back and take it.”
He expects a glare, or at least a sharp glance. He gets neither. Only a finger slowly tracing the rim of her coffee cup.
“What if I’m tired, James?” Her voice, low with melancholy, is deep in her chest, betraying its honesty. “I’m tired of having to claw and fight for every good thing in my life.”
James hesitates. The thought bubbling up in his throat is a risk. He knows that. He chooses to take it. “You didn’t fight for us,” he says softly. “And I thought we had a pretty good thing going.”
Finally, Lena’s attention breaks from the window, drifting to the mug between her hands. “Now you know why I didn’t.”
He nods. “I do.”
Looking at her now, after the weeks of confusion and months of hurt, he feels nothing but affection, and want. The desire to be the one thing she doesn’t have to fight for.
“That’s why I’m here,” he reminds her. “Because I know you still care. And because I still care about you.”
Her gaze lifts to his at long last, deep with heartache and a wary hope that even now can’t be totally dampened.
“You and I don’t have to fight. But if we do… if you want to, you won’t have to fight alone.”
James sees her hesitation in the twist of her lips, doubt in the glint of her eyes. “The way I treated you…”
“You can let it go,” he says. “I have.”
It’s true. It’s taken a while to get here, but he has. He has, to the point that his remaining sympathy is for Lena– for her decision to be alone rather than risk him.
“You said you were tired,” he continues. “Maybe it’s time for you to rest, and let yourself lean on someone you don’t need to fight for.”
He reaches across the table, gently clasping her wrist. “What do you say?”
She doesn’t speak, but the palm that turns to slide into his is answer enough.
#guardiancorp#post crisis#quiet in between#set somewhere canon adjacent#was having some feels today#decided to indulge#may or may not expand on this at some point
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2025 is the year of the DRAGON SLIPPERS
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#kutsurogi my room#eyestrain#(just a little) (that purple is a beast)#happy new year everybody!#still catching up but i needed to bust in to be extremely validated about some anime slippers#I KNEW IT i knew he'd have some doofy footwear!!!!#they're even actually dragon slippers!#i just got the wrong end of the dragon. whoops.#god. i love this idiot so much.#lilia really does have the best character development huh#lilia 600 years ago: i exist only to defend my kingdom against humanity. (eats a frog without breaking eye contact)#lilia today: wah i stubbed my toe :( i can't find my eyelash curler :( the sun is too bright :(#(this is not a complaint i genuinely love this silly grampa)#most relatable groovy ever tbh#sigh. i gotta have a serious think about my keys now.#i didn't get ANY of the new cards (not even the srs...)#i did get bloom lilia(!!!) from the mission pulls so that kinda made up for it but now i'm like#weighing the odds that birthday malleus is going to be in sweatpants...#i just feel deep in my bones that this upcoming mal card is going to be the funniest yet#(and this is saying something considering his og card literally is wearing a little frilly sash that says 'birthday boy')#honestly though no matter what malleus wears it's going to be incredible#this man has such an intrinsic vibe of dark hooded cloakiness that whenever he wears anything else it's guaranteed hilarity#sometimes i like to think about how he just wanders around campus in his little blazer and tie and it's the best
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I was talking about a historical male author I dislike because I found his works misogynistic and the person said, "Oh, well I suppose you don't read Shakespeare either." and I was like, "Shakespeare? SHAKESPEARE?!?! Of course I read Shakespeare, that man loved women."
Shakespeare wrote a wide variety of fleshed out female characters. He wrote Damsels in Distress, Cross-dressing Girlbosses, and Complex Female Villains. He wrote a woman who refused to sell her virtue to save her family and then shamed her brother for suggesting it. He wrote Taming of the Shrew and it's opposite, All's Well that Ends Well, in which the wife hunts down and tames the husband. He wrote men who are good because they listen to, trust, and defend women. He wrote women of all kinds. He wrote women who drive the plot and women doomed by the narrative. He wrote women in love and women who pathetically follow a man who doesn't like them and women in hatred. He wrote sensible women and silly women and everything in between of all ages.
I wish modern authors could write women as well as he did.
#shakespeare#Portia from The Merchant of Venice is the cross-dressing girlboss#Complex female villains include Lady Macbeth and the older sisters in King Lear#Measure for Measure is the virtue girl#Benedick is good because he believes Beatrice and defends Hero#Even the women in Taming of the Shrew have personalities#as problematic as that play feels today#The author I dislike is Trollope by the way#Aren't there some wives who just troll a guy for the whole play?#Merry Wives of Windsor? Falstaff? Am I remembering this correctly#anyway#absolute champion of writing women
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For moment, you are home.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#granny wen#a-yuan#wen qing#wei wuxian#wen ning#wen bin bin#Si-shu#I had hopes to post this for Valentine's day - but I chose to practice self-love and get some sleep.#Instead I am here on the day of this blog's two year anniversary to reminisce and give thanks.#Not quite about blog stuff. That's for another post. I have quite a few treats to share for this anniversary!#Rather...I've been thinking about my own relationships and the bonds I've forged and broken.#The transition between environments...when you leave somewhere and hear about how all the people you were once close with-#-have been moving on without you? It's so bittersweet.#You want to be happy for them. You wish you were at their side. You cannot be at their side.#Relationships change like the tides. They ebb and flow. Sometimes they crash so hard into the shore it reshapes it entirely.#The truth is that we are more surrounded by love than we realize. Even when we feel utterly alone - there is someone who wants to help.#And to me this scene strikes a chord in that way.#This is the reminder than even though you feel like it is all burning down around you - you are loved.#There are people who miss you. People who are so thankful for your presence in their life.#And most importantly of all. And I say this from the heart: There are people you have yet to meet.#Remember this in the darkest of days: The future is full of loves you have yet to see. The present is also full of love you forgot to see.#Another reminder to go tell someone you care about how much they mean to you today. It matters.
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to me there's really something about belonging to a generation of children whose star wars was the prequels, not the originals, not the sequels, whose shared formative childhood myth was not a hopeful one that ended in the defeat of evil and the birth of freedom, but rather a tragic one that took us halfway and dropped us in hell, at the nadir of civilization. lucas showed us to beware of greed, and the hardening of the hearts in fear and self-interest, the mechanization of people acting without empathy, the failure of mutual aid and symbiotic relationships. he depicted it in the way anakin chose his personal power and family over the good of everyone, becoming a fascist enforcer more machine than man, and the way palpatine first made the government worse and then instigated a war in order to get people to beg him to make it better through unilateral action. lucas warned us kids that money in politics would lead to liberty dying with thunderous applause, the empire rising, the jedi dying, the birth of the dark times. ultimately we have to borrow hope from baby luke to even put a glimmer of light at the end of the tunnel, but his very infancy puts a clock on how long we have to endure the darkness. this is our shared childhood myth, one of ruin. at least it's a story that gave us a vocabulary and mental model to understand what's happening, but god i wish we were the ones who got to dance with the fucking ewoks on endor's moon instead
#sorry if this is a muddle but im just#in some kind of mood today#being trans right now is#not great#and it's hard to feel hope yk like#i know you you have to try. i know that#but it's dark and scary
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Tired scribbly. Loose hair Emmy on the mind. 🥺
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#DAtV#Emmrich volkarin#my art#woke up feeling a lil off today#tired after doing errands and such#wanted to do some Emmy animations but ended up too tired#so just a scribbly for now#want to ruffle his hair and see how it flows#idk if he’s the only companion who doesn’t have a disheveled look post romance#but it would’ve been fun#open collar even
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Can I have your attention for a minute
It's nothing bad!
I wanted to share a little website with you, one i have used in the past. It's called Future Me.
All it is is a little web based word processor, that you fill in a letter to your future self, fill in your email address, pick a date, and hit send. The site will store the letter, and send it to your designated email on your designated date. It's completely free, though they accept donations if you like the service.
I've used this site for YEARS, it's not at all new, but it has at times been a little bastion of hope and good things for me. Every year on my birthday, I send a letter to myself, and I receive the one I sent the year before. I write about what I've been through that year, what I've accomplished, and what my hopes are for the year to come.
I have cried every single time I've gotten that letter. I know it's from me, but by the time it comes around, I've usually forgotten I sent it. But... every year on my birthday, I receive a letter from Past Me, who cared enough to sit down and have hopes about my future. And it makes me want to pay it forward to Future Me, and dare to hope that she, too, will remember that someone cared a lot about her future, and choose to keep going even further.
Anyway, I am giving you the link now, because there are definitely going to be rough times ahead of us, but I feel like maybe writing ahead to Future You, to the You that has made it past the rough times, might make them ever so slightly easier to endure. Knowing that Future You is waiting at the end of the line to welcome you, holding onto the letters you sent.
#personal#hope#encouragement#you don't have to send for your birthdays obviously#hell write one every week if it helps#or a year from today or whatever#it doesn't have to be a grand affair#sending your love ahead to Future You may be enough on some random tuesday#send yourself a letter for 6 months from now about 1 good thing that happened#do it daily if you like how it feels#or don't do it I suppose#but I promise it's worth it
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("Always. Continuously. With increasing apprehension, and decreasing hope. I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this." -- paraphrased from The Beatrice Letters, Lemony Snicket)
#svsss#bingqiu#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#lbh#sqq#i've been working through the series of unfortunate events and somehow that series has paired really nicely with svsss#the themes of cycling violence and what's justified and what isn't and what can possibly be done differently#and how trying to bring love and honour into the midst of it really changes nothing but also changes everything#it's just *chef's kiss*#i don't know how i can quite do my thoughts justice but i've spent the past few weeks quietly going between the two series (and mdzs and tg#as well if we're being honest they all hit similar questions and themes) and just reveling in the pain and ambiguity of it#everything is interconnected and it means you can never know what trauma and pain and necessity has shaped a person#each story goes too far back to ever ever EVER possibly see the full extent of it#at that level even communication itself is nearly impossible.#and because of that it's almost impossible to change anything. beat yourself apart and the outcome is the same#and yet ATTEMPTING to change things ATTEMPTING to do the kind thing the honourable thing is absolutely critical#because while you can change nothing you also have the capacity to change EVERYTHING#aaaaaaah i don't even know what i'm saying#but i read the beatrice letters today and the love letter just. killed me.#(obviously i cherrypicked some lines because it's three pages long but those ones felt right)#''i love you like a corpse loves a vulture's beak'' i just. can't get over that line.#to be completely changed. altered. destroyed. redeemed. purified. desecrated. reduced to nothing yet entirely necessary for another's life.#what a FUCKING line#anyway i was either going to blow up from thinking about it or else i had to exorcise it via art from an entirely different series#i've already done svsss and discworld why not throw a series of unfortunate events into the mix#i'll be honest folks i did not expect svsss to be the mxtx series that would fuck me up the most about the main ship#bingqiu is something else. i don't even know how to begin to approach my feelings on it. impossibility and necessity all at once#bizarre#my art
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Got a little brain worm on the way home and have a need to write it down. Just a drabble because I'm not good at writing.
DC x DP Just a (clone) couple
Joung Adult!Team Phantom for some reason end up in the DC universe. For reasons, there aren't any equivalents of them here. Danny and Sam are together and Danny and Dani have a familiar relationship. Whatever the reasons they stay in this universe.
So Sam, Danny and Dani start making a life together as a family, Tucker goes on to make a "small business" involving VPN's and tech in general (finds an anthropomorphic girlfriend on the way or something), Jazz goes to uni (JL members city of choice, although I advise against Gotham or Metropolis, because that would make this too short).
For some MORE reasons unknown, although they might be by the making of our favourite clock-man, the DP people's DNA has by default markings of being clones in DC (I don't know if this is canon or fanon but Connor had something like that ╮(^▽^)╭). The thing is here Jack = Bruce, Maddy = Alexander and Jeremy = Clark, Pamela = Lois! Do you see my vision here??
So *JL member from the perspective city* meets the Fenton/Manson/Nightingale?? family accidentally when they are visiting Jazz, and has a sweet deja vu moment. Some time passes and the off handedly mention it to someone in the JL.
Batman being the paranoid bastard that he is goes on to check this thing out, because he can smell the fish from a mile away. Thinks the couple are clones, gets very paranoid again and starts making plans, plans get found by his kids, kids tell the JL and friends. So starts the collective discussions of what should they do, some say that they should get rid of the clones, some others that they don't have proof for anything nefarious and shouldn't do anything at all, someone points out that they have literally showed up out of nowhere and that it is reasonable to be suspicious. And Connor is also there.
Meanwhile Team Phantom is going about their lives like normal, but with a "I know that you know" mindset, and don't really bother with hiding themselves.
In my opinion the part that has to be the most glaringly noticeable about them should be that Danny (Batman's clone apparently) should wear a lot of flannel and have a "Midwestern Nice" personality" (the stuff of legends I have only heard about in passing) and over all should resemble Clark in fashion sense. For Sam (Superman's clone apparently) the exact opposite - she can put the GOTH in Gotham.
And all JL angst/drama/confusion happens in the background as we follow Connor Kent's/Superboy's POV and him dealing with having two half siblings and the half siblings being together and them having a child and this is too much for him oooooooooo noooooooo nononoonononoonononononno what in the sweeet home Alabama whhhhhyyyyyyyy!??!
So it's like a metronome tick's between the POVs of fluffy new life/potential threat to the JL I mean the child of Bruce/Lex and child Clark/Luis having potential super-smart, super-powered (potentially evil??) children. But overall it's crack.
Maybe I'll plan it out and actually try to write it, but meanwhile you can enjoy my half-ill/fever induced brain worms and play in the brown dirt puddle I call my creative thinking.
To who ever finished reading this
Good night! ;P
#dpxdc crossover#dpxdc#batman#danny phantom#dc x dp#dc#dcxdp#dp x dc#danny fenton#sam manson#conner kent#superboy#superman#danny x sam#dani phantom#danny and dani are dad and daughter#sam is the stepmom but no-one knows this#Conor is hapoy to have some clone siblings and he wants and tries to get to know them but is somewhat put off my their relationship#he doesn't say ut tho#he knows what it's like to be discriminated against#he can become a good uncle#the justice league#young justice#god i feel terrible I'm probably not going to remember this in the morning#why the fuck did i go to uni today
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Saying Sorry Will Never Be Enough
Feeling a bit angsty so I had this idea.
Danny is dating one of the Bats/Birds, and everything is going great, amazing even! They know each other secrets (from powers to everything etc), they have a wonderful place to live (even if its in Gotham), Danny is in college on the way to becoming a space engineer (and he does side jobs for unrestful ghosts), he's actually getting sleep again since leaving Amity Park, gets along with their friends and family (those who Danny or his partner still talk to, up to the writer), there is even talk about marriage and perhaps adoption/kids in the future between Danny and the Bat/Bird he's dating!
Everything is setting up for a good life in his future, something Danny didn't think could have after his accident. He was happy finally, and currently packing up his old apartment because he's moving in with his partner in a few days.
So he felt like his core was being pulled out of him when he opens his apartment door one day receiving a knock to find his parents, who had hadn't seen since they kicked him out of the house after coming clean about being Phantom (their words of anger and denial that their son was 'dead' and now a monster, still hurt)
Sure they didn't attack him or proclaim he's dead but still their last words and anger HURT.
Danny didn't give them a chance to open their mouths, both looking nervous and guilty, before he slams the door close and turns invisible, grabs his phone, and fly's out of his apartment to his partner's place in a panic attack.
His partner, isn't happy.
#danny phantom#danny fenton#crossover#dp x dc#blue rambles#danny phantom dc#writing ideas#random idea#dpxdc#Who Danny is dating is up to the writer/reader#Danny is happy only to feel dread when he sees his parents at his front door#Jack and Maddie have come to try to make amends#does it work? idk again leaving it open for people to play with#they didn't attack him after finding out he's Phantom or proclaim him dead but they said some nasty stuff#Danny booked it out of Amity after that though not wanting to risk it#Danny's partner isnt happy to find their boyfriend in a panic attack after getting a sos text#its been a few years since he and his parents have seen each other#Danny and his partner relationship with their own families/friends are once again left open for the writer/reader to play with#Is Danny still friends with Sam and Tucker? Or have they grown apart after Danny left? Was Sam upset he 'abandoned' Amity Park/her?#Was Tucker upset too? Idk again leaving it up to anything#Is he still in contact with Jazz? Or has she been pushing him to try to talk with their parents only it keeps rubbing Danny wrong#IDK I felt angsty today and wanna make some people join me in my sad corner. Join me. Join me. Join meeeeeeeeeee -pats seat next to me-
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Cringetober Day 1. Screenshot Redraw
inspired by this early eah scene where raven "lets her bad side out" playing guitar and my cousin and I go "apple's probably losing it" and then they cut to her and she's making this face ��
#starting off cringetober strong with day 1 on day 4 lol#I'm gonna steamroll through 2 and 3 today (and I have 4 unposted from last year so that's convenient)#prompt months are a good excuse to a draw bunch of media But last week my cousin and I rewatched some eah (my first time since high school)#so it's in my brain right now anyway :)#ever after high#eah#raven queen#apple white#rapple#tagging rapple because I made this with rapple intent but technically this is literally just what happened LOL#I Still feel like I didn't push her expression quite a far as they did but you can look at the screenshot. she's sooo funny she's so#unsubtle#this also started out as a meme redraw can you guess the meme#huge shoutout to the heart card in the bg looking like a deliberate choice on my part to make this look romantic#september 2024#(yes I did start this a little early)#cringetober 2024
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I cannot overstate the net positive impact these two have had on my emotional and mental health.
#yes yes final fifteen notwithstanding#i mean overall#they've gotten me through some real shit#gotta get them to the south downs#good omens#good omens s2#ineffable husbands#crowley#aziraphale#aziracrow#a duck talks#a duck gifs#having some feelings today y'know?
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Reunion
#meadowart#in stars and time#isat spoilers#isat loop#isat siffrin#sifloop#i finished my second playthrough today#got 2hats obviously#and they made me ill again#couldn't stop thinking about their postgame meeting. i think it'd be pretty emotional at first. but once they processed everything they'd#just cling to each other and have a moment. maybe a long tender talk too#Sif looks different bc it's somewhat late postgame?? and i can't not think about Loop pointing out his change and feeling bitter because#they'll never get to change#(they will but they have to go through some thinking first okay)#hell yes i managed to load this#and even recovered the tags
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From the lovely minds of @babyblankyerror and @aroace-get-out-of-my-face I bring you ford hating a puppet more then Bill lol
Ford hate room requested in this
#science time with dr pine#ford pines#gravity falls#oh my god as soon as I woke up today I knew I had to draw this#I swear both of you are my muses lol#and love how much ford hate this puppet#because I feel like we’ll hate something for no real reason#or at least#a practical one lol#like I hate the movie cloverfield with a PASSION#if I watched again would I hate it as much maybe#but damn if that movie doesn’t make feel some kinda rage#anyway this getting long enough#also this super rushed but I still felt like I wanted to draw it before motivation left me#hope y’all have a good day :)
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first session on this LORGE boy!!
if i had a nickel for every time i got a tattoo of a dnd podcast with 69 episodes that made me cry, i'd have 2 nickels which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice
#dndads#dungeons and daddies#tattoo apprentice things#it needs maybe another hour for shading + fixing some lines#i ran out of time today and i didn't want to rush it#i'm trying to do these inky grungy outlines so i'll go back with my 3rl and do some more details#and pack in more black bc i did Not go deep enough#every time i feel bad about myself i just have to scream 'i've been doing this for a month'#it can only get better it's FINE
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it is insane how normal i am medicated like. you mean this was an option the whole time. what
#theresbeen some hiccups like the first month i started to realize my work drive was 90% fear based#so ivehad to develop like actual work schedule and discipline thats not just 'everyone will hate me if i dont'#but its been working! now getting stuff done actually... feels.... good?#instead of like throwing water over one fire only to run to the next one#like before nothing was ever satisfying. i was always just running around panicked#now im like. okay this is what i have to get done today. yay! i finished it! now i go to bed. okay now its the next day#the only other thing ive noticed is ive become seemingly like. more. autistic acting.#like i get More fixated on my special interests now. i can think about something for hours straight instead of getting guilty and thinking#'oh im being greedy im being lazy with my time i should be doing something productive'
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