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So. Um. I *might* have done a thing.

FINALLY.

Anyway, here's wonder wall.

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lowkey obsessed with my own blog. it has all my favorite things and all the opinions i agree with. best place on the internet maybe ever

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Also, Hunt seems to be starting his caveman era because he found out that Yang would trade him for a klondike bar. But like, who wouldn't?

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Got to the episode where Karev is on pediatric service for Arizona, and kinda bullies a dad into approving an exploratory surgery for his kid (who he thinks is faking). And then the kid starts bleeding out in recovery, so Karev sticks his hand in the kid's chest to find the bleed and stop it.

I would like to see Dr. Lena in that situation. Wrist-deep in a patient she advocated for? Chefs kiss.

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I tried the fic random generator, and I have some ideas for the results I got. Just gotta put them to paper now.

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Why can't Izzy stay gonnnnnnne? I really don't like her. I really dont.

The last few episodes of Greys that I've watched have been very light on Lexie content. As I get further and further, I'm thinking the next relevant episode will be the active shooter episode anyway.

At least Izzy is (mostly) gone. She came back for an episode and I almost tore my hair out. What a fucking bitch.

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I love the size of my chromebook, but I'm trying to move away from Chrome and Gemini and whatever else the fuck AI they're signing me up for without my consent.

Also, the stupid chromebook is struggling just to get the text post editor open, so I guess its time regardless.

I've downloaded LibreOffice for my desktop, and their site said they had a program for chromebooks, but it doesnt seem to be available for personal use. Bummer.

Looks like I'll be in the market for a new laptop. Anyone got any reasonably priced, not-enormously sized recommendations?

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The last few episodes of Greys that I've watched have been very light on Lexie content. As I get further and further, I'm thinking the next relevant episode will be the active shooter episode anyway.

At least Izzy is (mostly) gone. She came back for an episode and I almost tore my hair out. What a fucking bitch.

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I watched the episode where the Mercy West residents first meet the Seattle Grace residents and all that nastiness. Including Lexie using Kepner's diary against her. I was trying to see how Lena would fit into all of it. But she wouldn't have to fit! Because she was recovering from her liver donation to Lexie's dad.

So I imagine Lexie would go to Lena in her convalescence, and confess to her. But instead of finding the "well, I'm sure its been a stressful day", Lena is more like "I'm glad you realized how wrong it was".

And Lexie instantly gets defensive. "Well what do you know about it? The whole surgical team just threatened to quit for you, it's not like your job is at risk! You dont have to prove yourself! You're a *Luthor*!"

Lena blinks, eyebrows climbing. "Wow."

Lexie flushes furiously. "That's not what I meant--"

"I've been on the receiving end of someone using thoughts I thought were private against me, Lexie," Lena tells her. "It fucking sucks."

Sighing, Lexie deflates. "Yeah."

"You apologized," Lena continues, not quite softly, but not quite cutting either. "But it's not enough."

"I know, I just..." Lexie trails off, slumping as she finally sits on the edge of Lena's bed. "I hate feeling like this."

"It's in a surgeon's nature to be competitive," Lena allows. She reaches for Lexie's hand, who gives it with a sigh of relief. "We have to be, to fight death. But the minute we start competing against each other, the minute we start to weaponize patients against other surgeons, we stop being doctors."

Lexie gazes at her, until Lena gives a tilt of her head.

"And think of it this way... once the smoke of the merger clears, everyone left is going to have to work together. So what's the point of burning the bridges you'll need to use when you end up keeping the job?"

There's a long moment before Lexie gives a final sigh. "I love you."

"I love you too," Lena returns. She gives Lexie's hand a squeeze. "So don't go changing on me."

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Turns out I've already hit the season where the active shooter episode happens, so I should probably just stick with watching. Izzy just got fired, so hopefully it'll get easier to watch lol.

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i haven’t seen grey’s anatomy but i absolutely love your grey’s anatomy au. i love all of your au’s but especially any with lena angst. will your grey’s anatomy au have more lena angst? x

But of course. Especially since I wanna focus on the shooter and the plane crash, the most angsty of angsts.

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Are you going to continue your grey's anatomy au? 👀

I am! Already got part of the active shooter in the hospital episode written for it. But I kinda wanna see the episode before I do. Just in case there are some juicy emotional beats I'm missing.

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Dr Luthor, will see you now.

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Desperately trying to find an instrumental cover of Would You Fall In Love with Me Again that I can use for a skate program. I earmarked a couple of songs from Arcane S2 that I thought could work, but now I'm in love with the Ithaca Saga and I just can't.

It's either a vocal cover OR an instrumental version that's just the backing music.

All I want is a full orchestral version with cello as Odysseus and violin as Penelope. Is that really so much to ask for??

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Obsessed with the Ithaca Saga of Epic the musical. To elaborate on Lena-as-Penelope watching Kara-as-Odysseus go on her rampage, I *also* imagine that Penelope uses her secluded eavesdropping position frequently to spy on the suitors. In fact, I imagine she's listening when the suitors start plotting-- first with all-consuming, burning rage as they plan to murder her child, only to go absolutely ice cold when they detail how they want to rape her, with nary a one balking at the idea.

*That's* the moment that tips Lena over the edge of "I have to do the political thing" to "if my wife didn't come home when she did, I'd have slaughtered you myself".

I imagine Lena watches the whole thing, turning her back halfway through the final massacre, satisfied in the knowledge Kara won't let a single suitor live. She gives Kara time to meet their child, and to let Kara have her moment of reunion, let her believe that Lena hasn't seen how cruel and hateful she's become.

So that Kara doesn't see how cruel and hateful Lena has become herself.

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Officially submitted a new original short story to a short story contest hosted by one of my local libraries! Feeling super stoked.

Now to celebrate by ordering in lunch!

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I'm now thinking about Telemachus in the Epic the musical au. It occurred to me that it would be cool if Kara thinks she left Lena all alone, but in Kara's absence Lena adopts a child, who grows up with stories of Kara, longing to be her and protect their mother from the suitors. And then when Kara overhears the suitors plans to rape Lena and kill the kid, Kara's like-- a kid? *MY* kid. Just instant, immediate this is Lena's kid and therefore my child as well, and extending her fierce and deadly devotion to them as well.

The kid would still be in awe of Kara, and still love her as their parent. Instant family.

(Also, side note as I listen to the Ithaca Saga, I like the idea of Lena watching from the balcony as Kara goes on her rampage. Just... dispassionately watching as her wife absolutely slaughters the men who have been itching to rape her for years. Or maybe a little dark satisfaction. Either way works. Just Lena watching the hunt and the kills and being totally okay with it.)