#unironically and completely seriously my god

[yumaisbored]

on one hand, tgcf convinced me life is worth living. on the other, i now have unbelievably unrealistic expectations.

[halfdeadwallfly]

[moe-broey]

Man..

[wenclair-more-like-whenclair]

If you’ve ever thought about writing smut or a sex scene but for some reason haven’t bc of fear or shame, this is your sign from God telling you that you should go for it. You should just go for it.

Genuinely, seriously, and completely unironically, writing sex scenes and exploring my favorite characters’ sexualities in writing has been one of the most healing and rewarding hobbies I have embraced in my adulthood. As someone who grew up queer in a hyper-conservative Christian space, I felt robbed of getting to explore sexuality in a healthy way, but writing smut can be such an amazing way to understand your own kinks and desires. Personally, it has helped me figure out what I am looking for sexually in a relationship and how I would like to be treated.

The internet has never had greater communities than the thousands of ppl on this app and ao3 who bond over a shared love of fictional character porn. Seriously, I have yet to think of anything more BEAUTIFUL and MAGICAL than the spiritual connection we feel across continents and all over the world just bc we believe that two men want to fuck. And trust me, there is something freeing and liberating about getting to write it yourself. Is there any kink you’d like to explore but are too shy to explore it with a partner at first? There is literally not a safer space than your own mind and the beautiful words you will create just trying to describe a cock going into a hole.

This is me fully affirming and supporting anyone across the world who wants to write about some fucking. DO THAT SHIT, man. It’s SO FUN. In my mid-twenties, my ideal relaxing day off is literally making myself a cup of hot coffee, turning on the lo-fi, and writing a good smut scene between one of my favorite ships. Literally the highest form of self-care imo. Nothing feels better. WRITE THAT SHIT.

[doodler16]

I can't take Charlie as a protagonist seriously, especially after the Hell's Greatest Dad song. I was willing to forgive her constant naïveté and overall childish behavior till that episode.

I'm sorry, but do you really want me to take a woman in her early-mid twenties seriously when she's being fought over like she's a preteen child of the divorced parents? Anyone at this age would have died of embarrassment and immediately called this crap out. 

Theoretically, it could've worked if it was shown that she was playing along with Alastor in order to manipulate her father, but she seemed genuine in that song?? Like, girl, did you REALLY buy Alastor's crap? He only lived here for a couple of months, and you already act like he's a wise father figure to you?? Like why?? They didn't even interact properly in series prior besides maybe exchanging a couple of lines, idk. (Plz, don't bring up the pilot cause I didn't watch it, lol, so I have zero clue what their relationship was supposed to entail there. I only judge by what I've seen in the series.)

Daddy issues or not, but Charlie was severely infantilized by this song, and she's supposed to help redeem the sinners, which requires a lot of wisdom, maturity and compassion in order to guide them. And she has none of that.

What a waste.

Even more reasons to appreciate my goat, Mimzy. Thank god for her stepping in and interrupting the song. This is fandom once again doesn’t deserve Mimzy 😂.

That aside, there are families or relatives who do unironically fight over their adult child for whatever reason. I am open to Lucifer and Alastor fighting over Charlie, like you said Anon it could theoretically work.

I was going to briefly bring up Charlie and Alastor’s dynamic in the pilot how Alastor and Lucifer fighting could’ve worked but I won’t since you didn’t watch the pilot and don’t want me to bring it up 😅.

Hell’s Greatest Dad doesn’t work because like you mentioned Anon, Alastor barely interacts with Charlie and only interacts with her when it’s convenient for himself and the episode/plot. So, it is easy to tell that Alastor is not only lying (throughout majority of the song) but repeatedly trying to make himself look good any chance he gets.

I don’t know why some fans and stans thought Alastor was serious about him seeing Charlie as her daughter when he was just lying. I know Vivziepop loves pushing that since she had beef with Chalastor shippers ages ago. It is annoying seeing some fans actually use Alastor’s lie as a “gotcha” moment and a way to put down Chalastor shippers.

If Alastor did see Charlie as a daughter (in more twisted way), he would’ve consoled her in episode 7 but didn’t. Charlie would proceed to ramble while Alastor would roll his eyes.

I know Hell’s Greatest dad song is an extremely popular song as it’s the top of Amazon’s most viewed videos but it could’ve been cut. We didn’t an entire 2-3 minute song dedicated to the two men having a pissing contest while Charlie third wheels especially when the episode is supposed to be about Charlie and Lucifer. It easily could’ve slimmed down via dialogue. Or cut it out completely and save it for another episode.

[xyaehir]

need ur attention asap —

SYP — w characters who i think are actually really clingy (secretly or not)

GEN. — fluff

WARN. — gn!reader, clingy characs, pda, sickening couple activities

REQ. — “do you do carlos madrigal x reader.. if yes, could I get one?? i can’t really find any recent ones now and I love your works! if not, that’s completely fine!!! xx”

NOTES. — im literally so bad at sticking to one character 😭 im glad u love my works, have a good day lovely <33

thinking about having a clingy bf who can’t get enough of ur love <3

ur clingy bf! who can’t stop clinging onto you like a koala.

ur clingy bf! who loves back hugging you and discovering different cuddle positions.

ur clingy bf! who shows up to your door at random times with a bouquet of your fav flowers.

ur clingy bf! who has a secret obsession with the sweet taste of your lips.

ur clingy bf! who encourages you to play the chapstick game, a new excuse to kiss you over and over. (he doesn’t even make an effort to guess the flavour..)

ur clingy bf! who pulls you away at any social event to kiss you breathless.

ur clingy bf! who stares at you with a subtle pout as his friends drag him away to do god knows what.

ur clingy bf! who basically uses his status to go see you instead of doing what he should be.

ur clingy bf! who refuses to remove his arms around you in the morning, leading you to quite literally limp around with him attached to your hip.

ur clingy bf! who tries to act stoic in public but his facade crumbles in 5 minutes and his hands are back on your waist.

ur clingy bf! who has a habit of rubbing your noses together.

ur clingy bf! who carries you all different styles and doesn’t care about your protests.

ur clingy bf! who always cradles your face so gently whenever you’re ranting and just stares at you with heart eyes and a big, silly smile on his lips.

ur clingy bf! who pulls you back to his chest when you get even a centimetre farther from him.

ur clingy bf! who gives you another bottle of his perfume to spray on your clothes so you smell like him when you go out.

ur clingy bf! who’s always there for receiving and giving affection, especially on hard days.

ur clingy bf! who’d rather die than leave the comfort of your arms wrapped around him, his safe place.

ur clingy bf! who loves you so much that he has to remind you how amazing you are literally every 10 minutes.

ur clingy bf! who send you those care-packages every month filled with all of your favourite things, skincare, games, books etc.

ur clingy bf! who always matches with you in real life and in every game you two own. (no such thing as u playing a game that he doesnt play)

ur clingy bf! who’s always loud asf whenever he sees you. (mf sprints to u to give u a hug)

ur clingy bf! who calls you every single term of endearment, even the weirdest ones.

ur clingy bf! who definitely unironically calls you his pookie wookie farting glitter boo boo bear. (he says it so seriously too..)

ur clingy bf! who wont let you pay for anything and spoils you with everything he can get his hands on.

ur clingy bf! who would and will give the world to you.

thinking about having a clingy bf who can’t get enough of u <3

bonus!! —

the sound of the iphone alarm rings throughout the bedroom. a mix of deep, raspy groans and soft whining fill the room, replacing said irritating noise.

you reach to tap the ‘snooze’ button but a hand grabs your arm. he stretches a hand out to hit it instead but missed 5 times before effectively shutting it off. he groans, wrapping his arms around your waist and burying his face into your chest.

“babe, get up. you’re too fat, you’re suffocating me.”

“‘s too early to get up, stop squirming,” he reaches a hand up to your face, trying to cover your mouth before you slap it away.

you wriggle in his grasp before stopping, surrendering to his warmth.

“morning, my sweet waffle with honey, maple syrup and berries on top.”

there was a good few seconds of silence to make you realise he’s not joking and genuinely calls you that.

upon imagining the image of waffles in your mind, the idea obviously makes your stomach grumble. you wanted to get up and make some but forgot about the tired guy on your chest.

with a loud groan, you drag him with you out of bed. you can definitely hear his quiet giggles as he brings the blanket with him, perched on his shoulders while you drag him around.

bonus #2!! —

“i got it, i got it!”

“baby, let me pay for it!” you strain out, struggling against his tight embrace. you can feel the vibrations of his chest behind you as he captures your arms in one hand and tries to put the money in the machine with the other.

you squeal when you free your hands from his vice grip and he tickles you to prevent sticking your money in.

“babe, babe stop! i wanna pay, its my turn.”

“i got it, don’t worry. im not gonna let you pay, ill cover it,” he laughs, taking the cash from your hands and slipping it back into your wallet.

at this point, you’re thrashing around in his grasp, not harsh enough to hurt him though. he has his arms hooked under your shoulders to prevent you from moving forward.

“please, let me pay! i got it, its fine!” he protests through his own laughter.

you throw your head back on his shoulder, giggling while trying to free yourself from his grip. he leans downwards and presses several kisses to your face, successfully stopping your movements.

he paid for you again. hey, at least you tried, right?

— (bllk) NAGI, sae, REO (genshin) KAEYA, CHILDE (star rail) gepard, JING YUAN, SAMPO (haikyuu) SUNA, tsuki, KENMA, KUROO (KNY) TANJIRO, AKAZA (ENCANTO) carlos, CAMILO (ATSV) miguel, MILES, PAVITR () YOUR FAVES

@xyaehir 2023. This is my content, inspired or not. Do not translate, copy or plagiarise my works in any way. Reblogs and likes are greatly appreciated. <3

[wonysugar]

hate rodrigo (literally) | aeri uchinaga

a/n: this is not even a fic this is a tiny little one shot that i wrote yesterday night AT LIKE TWO AM due to thoughts we had in a discord server ahem anyways I FELL ASLEEP THO. soo have this now!!

genre : really bad crack smut like i genuinely have no idea how to describe this

word count : like 600 something?

tags : one shot, smut (obvs), crack, ptv mention, falling in reverse mention, olivia Rodrigo mention, mcr mention, taylor swift mention (sorry @pupyuj)

pairing : angsty!giselle x whitegirlmusic!femreader (I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO LABEL THISSFJEKF)

your music taste wasn’t something you particularly shared with people, but you didn’t hide it, either. to you, it was music, nothing more, nothing less.

however, one of your friends, aeri, took music very, very seriously, and it really showed. she had a certain aesthetic, she wore certain things and god, did she listen to certain music.

“no like i genuinely can’t grasp the fact that you unironically listen to olivia rodrigo?” she laughed, leaning back on her bed as you stared at her in disbelief.

“god aeri, some of her songs are good, you just haven’t tried them.” you snapped back, wearing a convinced smile as you proceed to jokingly hit her arm.

“okay, sure, whatever. but just imagine getting to know someone, going on dates with them, all the sha-bang. then, when it’s time to get down and freaky, they turn on their sex playlist and motherfucking driver’s license starts playing??”

she was basically cackling at that point and you couldn’t do anything to stop it. defending your cause seemed like it would’ve been difficult, with how far up her own ass she was.

“yeah, because that isn’t a sex song? olivia rodrigo doesn’t make fucking sex music?? try putting a falling in reverse song while you get naked, see how that works out for you.” you fight back.

“oh i don’t know about you, but i’d be soaked for sure. plus, anything would be better than hearing young adult women sing about their previous relationship like it was a war they fought in.” she kid, crossing her arms in victory, as if she even won the argument in the first place.

“i’m gonna make you swallow those words right back up, uchinaga.”

“try me, l/n.”

-

“f-fuck y/n, go- mmh- slower..”

so, it wasn’t supposed to happen this way!

it originally was just the both of you, taking turns and putting different songs on the bluetooth speaker and rating them based on ‘how wet it got you’.

turns out, while that was a theory stage, there seemed to be a practice one too, and you’ve been in it for the past 10 minutes now.

thrusting your fake cock in and out of her, paying no mind to the very loud, very obnoxious pierce the veil song that was playing in the background, you pinned her hands above her head. your pace increased with time, and the decibels of her voice increased with the pace.

“oh my god y/n pleasepleasepleasepleasee i’m s-so sorry i- fuck me- i didn’t mean-“ she cried, poor thing probably didn’t even realize that her black eyeliner was running all over her cheeks. her arms and legs wrapped around you,

“shut your fucking mouth and take it, you emo fucking cumslut.” you slammed your strap into her as she yelled out your name. while she was pleading and begging for something, you were on top of her perfect laying-in-mcr-bedsheets body.

she, herself, wasn’t aware of what she was begging for, her mind was completely blank. all she could think about was how good her pussy felt when you pounded it so violently, when you were being so aggressive with her that you just used her body however you wanted.

you thought that whole thing would be a one-time occurrence, but no, it happened a second time, when she said that taylor swift had mid music. was she doing it on purpose or something?

anyways,

yes, you fucked her with the 1989 album playing.

[comicaurora]

What are your thoughts on guardians vol.3? (If you have watched it) I went into it, expecting it went to the garbage like the rest of the mcu, but I was pleasantly surprised by its creativity, trope subversion, and how it wrapped up the previously unresolved arks of its characters.

That's what I've heard!

The thing is, Guardians 3 could be the most transcendent work of cinema ever made, and I'd probably still feel little to no motivation to watch it at this point. It's not Guardians's fault - it's just suffering from the same problem that superhero comics have been struggling with for decades: no matter how good an individual arc or run is, absolutely nothing good lasts or matters in the long term, and the stories are shaped in such a way that "the long term" is the only thing anyone gets to build towards.

Whenever I complain about the MCU I get a handful of people loudly complaining about my complaining, with the general thesis that if I don't like it I shouldn't watch it or talk about it - if I'm not having fun, just stop engaging with it. And the thing is, I have. I am intellectually interested in why this massive franchise is fumbling the bag so hard, which is why I still check in on it sometimes, but I've long since stopped turning to the MCU for uncritical entertainment. And even the good movies or shows with a lot of interesting ideas - good character arcs, fun concepts, interesting planting for future payoff - don't draw me in anymore, because they're hooked into a massive moneymaking machine that will scrap and squander anything if they think it'll make them more in the quarter. It doesn't matter how good the writing is, because the writers are not allowed to tell a complete, finished story, and they have no control over what happens to their characters outside of their own script.

Captain America's arc was set up from literally minute one to answer one burning question at the core of his character: does a world without a war still need Captain America? After that incredibly basic tee-up at the end of First Avenger, half a dozen movies failed to come up with a reason to say "yes," and now Steve is retired for good after getting fumbled through four different storylines that couldn't even pretend that they needed him (the unused Chekhov's Phone from the end of Civil War still haunts me). The foundational arc of his entire character never happened because nobody bothered to keep track of it past a single movie.

Taika did something interesting with Thor in Ragnarok - take away Mjolnir, force him to recognize what it means to be the god of thunder, give him a very Odin-y missing eye - and the very next movie undid all of it. Just kidding, never mind, here's an eye and a new weapon and also his old weapon again, and in one more movie we're even gonna give him his hair back, probably as an apology for all the completely unironic fatphobia we're gonna slather him in for two and a half hours. I'm not even surprised Love And Thunder was such an overblown mess that barely took itself seriously - why would Taika bother trying to give Thor another arc when the powers that be will just roll it back in six months anyway?

I hear Rocket Raccoon has a fantastic arc in this movie. That's great, and demonstrates that he's being written by a writer that deeply cares about him. But he's part of the MCU, and the MCU doesn't let anything end, so if current patterns hold, Rocket is going to continue to serve as quippy plushie-bait for the next dozen movies and none of that depth is going to come through in the long term. Hell, since they're making Kang noises for the Next Big Threat and Kang's entire gimmick is rewriting timelines, literally none of this is guaranteed to matter. By next year, it might not have even happened anymore.

The MCU has successfully shaped itself into a paradigm where the bright spots of good writing are overridden and lost as soon as the writers room turns over, and that makes it really hard for me to muster up the enthusiasm to watch even a really good movie that's locked into the exact same grist mill as everything else. I'm glad people liked it, I hope it gets to stay good this time - I just have no desire to watch it.

[aramynx]

DENKI KAMINARI HEADCANONS...

*.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.* *.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.* *.·:·.✧ ✦ ✧.·:·.*

⚡︎ sweetheart, sugar, baby

⚡︎ never takes anything seriously- unless it’s actually something really serious! then he activates his singular brain cell

⚡︎ “what’s cookin’ good lookin’?”

⚡︎ and he says it at least twice a day, oh my god

⚡︎ laughed when you asked him out on a date because he thought it was a prank, and cried from guilt when you told him you were being completely serious

⚡︎ worships you like a goddess and you have no idea if it’s a just bit he’s committing to or not

⚡︎ pizza and mario kart date nights, except he short circuits the console when things get too tense so neither of you ever win

⚡︎ “god damn it not again! i was so close to beating you!”

⚡︎ he was actually in 11th place

⚡︎ jumpscares you as often as he can

⚡︎ you can NOT let this man’s hands go anywhere near your stomach. he WILL tickle you- and you’re scared.

⚡︎ every time his hands get close to your stomach you tense up and he finds it so funny-because he wasn’t even going to do anything this time. and he always acts so offended and pouty about it!

⚡︎ “woooow babe i can’t believe you don’t even trust me, your own boyfriend, i would never ever tickle you”

⚡︎ spoiler alert: he did tickle you

⚡︎ the worst sweet-talker ever. all of his flirting is so brainrotted it makes you cringe; sometimes you wish he would stop trying to flirt with you :(

⚡︎ unironically uses the word ‘rizz’

⚡︎ spams you with dumbass tiktoks 24/7, and they don’t even make sense?? like weird edits of cats

⚡︎ “babe its literally me”

⚡︎ get this man to TOUCH GRASS

⚡︎ he can actually be sweet when he wants to be though- he’ll bring you sunflowers on bad days

⚡︎ he charges your phone for you whenever you want!!

⚡︎ touchy feely 24/7, he can NOT keep his hands off you- he just has to be touching you if he’s able to!

[jade-len]

bad svsss fanfic/au idea: random marriage/guidance counselor transmigrates into PIDW, sees the absolute mess of lord luo bingge and his harem, goes "jesus fucking christ", and makes bank.

and like. they're probably not even that good of a counselor. it's just that people lack any sense when it comes to bingge, and since he's the emperor, that means pretty much everyone. also because therapy doesn't exist. i'll give them some credit though, whatever they hell they're doing works.

now, while sqq and sqh are having a grand ol' time in SVSSS with their husbands, this random, average counselor has to deal with being in the care of lord luo bingge. no wife beam. no anything. all they have is some basic empathy and common sense people just tend to lack in here for some reason.

it's even worse considering the fact that they've arrived after luo bingge completed his plan and became the hailed demon emperor. now, while they've never full on read the entire thing, they've heard enough from a close friend who has kept up with it to know the main character is the literal embodiment of the cycle of abuse and heavy unresolved issues. like, it got to the point where they started to unironically use luo bingge as an example of how to not deal with conflicts and trauma.

really, how could people like bingge? seriously, it's just another edge lord main character with way too many glamorized issues and abuse. red flag! (hey, who the hell is peerless cucumber and why does he keep defending binghe? lord, have mercy on these impressionable young men...)

so, after being kidnapped taken in by bingge and his wives after the bunch claimed that they were a "wise man" or whatever (all they did was offer some basic relationship advice to some poor woman, who turned out to be ning yingying, who told the other wives, and it just spiraled from there), they were deemed "special" and given their personal office and a room! hey, better than being on the streets in this god forsaken hentai-ish world, i guess.

quickly, a routine was established. one that, especially, consisted of luo bingge outright ignoring them. which, they weren't complaining about!

wake up, eat, meet with multiple of the wives, spend their hard earned money on delicious delicacies, meet with more wives, sleep, repeat. the most interaction they had with the demon emperor was him ordering them around, but even then, that was uncommon. it was, surprisingly, easy to fall into the rhythm of this undoubtedly odd life. you're upset that lord luo hasn't spent much time with you? maybe you can ask! the other wives are being annoying? remove yourself from the situation. you're upset that lord luo has so many other wives? oohhh... yeah. uhm.

luo binghe only tolerated them, they knew that. and they're sure that, if not for multiple of his wives insisting on keeping them, they'd be dead for even daring to be so "intimate" with them. a little bit of a shock, if they do say so themself. like, insecure much (something that they'll probably never get used to is the fact that bingge built an entire little village for his wives, though)?

but that's not the most shocking thing, oh, no.

it's this.

"i- i tried.. i tried to take the.. hiic-- other.. other shizun w-with me.." lord luo binghe, the powerful, almighty demon emperor, trembles and sobs. "b-but he! he wanted to-- s-stay with that.. stupid, inferior version of my- hic- self.."

despite the mountain of gold they're getting paid in, is it really enough to deal with this? probably not. will they get killed for witnessing luo binghe's vulnerability? perhaps. is he a dictator, the embodiment of the cycle of abuse, and a crazily vengeful bastard? definitely.

"it's-- s' not.." his voice breaks. something else inside of them probably does, too. "..n-not, hiic- fair."

should they feel bad? they shouldn't. he's hurt much too many people. isn't it a little late? can he even be redeemed? because, they are absolutely not here to try and "fix" him.

and yet.

"can you breathe, lord luo? deep breaths, don't focus on anything else but me, okay? i'll do it with you too. can you do that for me? there, there. you're doing a very good job, do you know that? here, when i'm upset, sometimes i like to do something called, '5-4-3-2-1'. i promise it'll help, binghe. would you like for me to do this one with you too?"

they can't help but think about a small, lonely boy on qing jing peak.

. . .

after that, bingbing slowly starts to come around and develop an actual bond! cool!! he just,,, can't believe only his wives were granted the "wisdom". how foolish was he?

"i know i'm only a mere human, but i can tell that lord luo is... masking things. you can put that away for now, okay? i promise, everything you say here will be confidential information, and it'll never leak... no no there's no enemy spies here-"

"i'm not even going to question this. you go back there right now and deal with it yourself if you cannot respect me or the other clients. aka, your wives."

"no, it's not stupid. this is how people help themself, and it's okay if you want to do it. as long as it doesn't hurt you or anybody. it helps, and that's all that matters."

"oh? one of your wife confronted to you about it? i'm glad to hear that, she's doing well, i see. i'm also happy that you're listening too, really."

"yes, and when something like that happens, you--- no- don't pull out xin mo now. what did we say about that? good job."

"here, can i touch your hands, binghe? there we go. when you're unsteady, you feel the need to pick at your skin, correct? well, let's try a few different things to keep those hands busy! it must be quite stressful being an emperor. how about we start with crocheting! it's quite popular back at my hometown."

"your mother sounds like a wonderful woman, lord luo. hey, how about you take a small break and visit her, okay? you want me to come with you? of course, it'd be an honor."

and thus, the story of the poor transmigrator counselor continues on with luo bingge added to their schedule!! this could be read as romantic or platonic lol. but i was thinking of this as luo bingge obtaining his first actual friend. it takes a long while due to bingge's... bingge-ness, but eventually it all works out lmao

[quitealotofsodapop]

Thought: Wukong and Erlang are actually super chill with each other but PRETEND to hate each other around strangers so no one starts asking inconvinuent questions like "Hey, why did you let so many monkeys on FFM go if you were supposed to burn the place to the ground?" And so they end up having conversations like:

Erlang: Seriously? Your successor had the same name as my dog? Dude, that's so funny.

Wukong: I told you, it's not the same, they're spelled different!

Erlang: But they still sound the same.

Wukong: Gods, you're so-

Erlang: Hey, someone's coming, get in character!

Wukong: UNBELIEVABLY PRETENTIOUS! I HATE YOU WITH ALL OF MY BEING!

Erlang: NOT AS MUCH AS I HATE YOU, MONKEY!

Mac: Guys, chill it's just me.

Definitely.

You see... Erlang was a big brother-figure to Wukong when the monkey started working for the stables and later the orchard. But they had a Big falling out because of the celestial war, the ensuing fight on FFM, and the capture that led the Monkey King into the Furnace.

Even with an uncomfortable reunion in Jttw to fight the Nine-Headed Monster - Erlang and SWK's brotherly bond still holds. Wukong knows that his bro wouldn't have burnt FFM unless no other miltary option was available to him; in Wukong's mind it was either the fire on the mountain, or it would have been complete annihilation of his fellow monkey yao from Heaven.

Fun fact: one chinese media theory I read mentioned that Erlang's "mercy" to the monkeys of FFM was likely to warn/evacuate them before the fires were set by Heaven - hence why so many monkeys survived and why Wukong welcomed him with open arms later on.

Even with the following debacle of "The Lotus Lantern" (a tale which Erlang Shen was the antagonist, though not without reason), the demi-god and monkey yao still consider eachother brothers.

The issue in the modern day, especially in the LMK verse? Status in Heaven.

Erlang and his sworn brothers were barely considered mortal mercenaries to the Celestial Realm before the war. Afterwards though? He became a Heavenly General. Outclassing even the Pagoda King in military respect. It was an insane promotion for the demi-god. He's now working directly with his uncle, the Jade Emperor, and is privy to the true cruelty the royals can dish out.

And exactly what the Emperor and Queen Mother think of his brethern.

To reference the most chilling scene in animation history (Prince of Egypt):

Jade Emperor: "Oh my boy... they were only mortal."

Erlang Shen can't risk the world knowing his true thoughts. How much he cares about his wild little brother. How much he actually knows is going on.

Yang Jian doesn't want to lose another sibling.

So yeah, in public the two pretend to hate eachothers guts. Only the Plum Hill boys themselves + Xiaotian Quan actually know that the two meatheads are thick as thieves. It takes Macaque a while to understand why Wukong dares to associate with the man who "burned our home". But a few incidents in the coming years leads Macaque to realise that the all-seeing God is deliberately ignoring some intel that could have spelled disaster for their new family.

Erlang (has the Third Eye): "The Harbringer's presence is still lurking on Earth. You, the Six Eared Macaque have been returned to the world of the living after so long. Not only that, but you and the Monkey King are living in secrecy among demons and humans alike raising a child of unknown powers..."

Macaque: *poised to start fighting*

Erlang: "...It's none of my business either way. Congrats on the baby, and your reunion as well. Bro would not stop talking about you when he was drunk." *leaves a baby-shower gift*

Macaque (has lie-detecting ears): "What the..."

Btw Erlang is def the type of (sworn) uncle to unironically get MK a dog toy as a baby shower gift. ("What? You'll thank me when he starts teething.")

[iceyrukia]

I unironically think Tite Kubo is a misogynist for making Or1hime and Ich1go end up together.

And I'm not just saying this because ichiruki is my OTP but it's because the fact that this man knows how to write romance and ichiruki's bond is top notch even when you compare it to actual shoujo pairings - he could have written ich1hime into something that developed slowly over time that maybe could have at least made sense and delved into something organic, but till the very end they felt like awkward acquaintances. The gap in closeness between Ich1ruki ('more than friends less than lovers') vs the cannon Ich1hime ship bond is quite frankly jarring like there is seriously no competition. Now renj1ruk1a, while I'm not enthusiastic about, at least had something to it but again, comparing Ich1go's and Ruk1a's relationships with other people aside from the one that they have with each other, Ich1go's and Or1hime's relationship is hands down one of the most lackluster in the show. Heck, Ich1go even had a more dynamic relationship with Ury*u, Chad and even T4tsuki for god's sake.

I really think that the only reason Ich1hime ended up together is because Ich1go is the male hero lead and the "appropriate" love interest in Kubo's head was a woman who fit the "ideal" woman to start a family with and that's where Or1hime fits the bill. She's the typical ideal shy and submissive Japanese girl ( not to mention the ridiculous breast size) who is motherly and completely smitten and devoted with the male lead and I guess Kubo thought that was peak heterosexual romance as opposed to the duo with the sun and moon symbolism and moving 'she stopped the rain' 'i wonder if i can keep up with the speed of the world without you' poetry.

Also, you would think that male authors who put so much work into their male leads would develop the romantic bonds and individual character of whatever female love interest they plan to pair up the precious male hero but NOPE - they often don't do that and it's where you can clearly see men's misogyny and how little women matter to them.

And when you have a story where you can actually see the male author write such a beautiful deep relationship between two opposite sex characters without bullshit gender roles and then go ahead and make one pairing (involving one of the main characters) that fits patriarchal gender roles cannon ??!!! - in the same fucking story where you can directly compare them - it's the misogyny I'm afraid.

[meraki-yao]

What’s your angle on the Cinderella film? So curious!

I finished my essay and literally just hit the word limit so that tells you something about my thoughts lol

But all in all, I think it's a bad movie. It can be a fun watch, but it's not... meaningful.

My essay was on the representation of gender and stereotypes presented in media, so I'm gonna talk a bit about that: Cinderella 2021 was marketed as an empowering feminist retelling of the fairy tale. However, in the movie, all achievements of female characters are completed by men's actions: Ella couldn't sell her dress (which was atrocious, what the fuck was that dress) so Robert bought it and invited her to the ball to network. Gwen was only crowned heir because Robert stepped down.

Also, any improvement in gendered treatment is achieved by royalty, which just perpetrates the social stratification of the caste system under a patriarchal monarchy. Many women, most of which are peasants, expressed their discontent during Idina Menzel's song (I think it's called Dream Girl?), but only Ella, the prince's girlfriend, Gwen, the princess, and the queen's situation changes.

Sociology aside, the script is just bad too. I heard Nick/Robert unironically and completely seriously say "Some say I am a mama's boy who still needs a little spanking on the tush tush" (God I can't believe I typed that) There's too much use of modern slang used without blending in with the supposed fairy tale time period.

I feel like this film was a lot of fun for our Nicky boy to film, but ultimately it's not a good movie.

[definitelyunhingedagentphoenix]

hey hye hey im back

(making this my second home)

grabs you by your neck

HAND OVER YOUR HANDLER HEAD CANONS OLEASE

Okay! Okay! I'll give you what you want!

Handler headcanons here we go.

So he is so soft. Like he only likes feel good movies. Romance, Disney movies, and ones with not a lot of conflict. He sees a lot of death on the job and just... Doesn't want to deal with that outside of work hours.

He does have a bit of a skewed sense of justice though. After years of working in the agency, the phrase "an eye for an eye" means something a little different. A little darker. He doesn't flinch at a gun shot, or his agents blowing things up. Enemies are more like a number on a spreadsheet rather than actual human beings.

But by God does this man care for his friends so deeply. When he found out about Roxana working for Zor, he wasn't just betrayed because it's his colleague working for his enemy. It was his family turning their back on him personally.

But he forgives just as easily.

He likes to pull pranks in the office on the good/slow days. He has been asked to stop. That's partly why REALLY cares for Agent Phoenix's antics. HE can't get away with things now that he's one of the big shots in the EOD but Phoenix can. And Phoenix DOES.

He has an immense love of animals and they love him back. They can sense his good vibes and flock to him like he's a Disney princess singing in the woods. He could literally go into the woods and see like 100 animals. He has pet a deer before. He has photo evidence. He loves to bird watch from his office.

Reginald has insanely good luck. There have been times that he disarmed a bomb completely by accident. Sometimes he swears that his good luck transfers to his agents when they're on missions. How else did Agent Phoenix manage to live all those times?

But that doesn't mean that every mission is a success. He's seen a lot over the years and goes to therapy regularly. At least as regularly as the job allows. He's in and out of the country just as often as his agents are so if he can, he'll do online therapy sessions.

He has to keep busy. He's not one to sit around and do nothing. He NEEDS to be doing something. So he has taken up just about every hobby that he can while in the office. Knitting, crochet, writing. He loves to write murder mysteries but everyone tells him it's so obvious who the killer is. He doesn't care. He writes them and leaves them in people's offices for them to read.

Anything he knits is also distributed through the EOD. He's surprisingly good at it, actually. People love getting a pair of mitts from him and scarves are fought over. They're really cute and have really cute designs on them. All of them have the EOD logo on them.

One time he knitted so many things that he decided to donate them and the shelter actually had no room for all of them.

Agent Phoenix does not admit to it ever but every time he makes them something, they keep it forever. If anything gets damaged while on a mission they lose their mind over it.

He wears Crocs unironically.

Can't cook to save his life. Has literally never turned the stove on in his house. It's there for show.

He always wanted kids but was told very young that he was unable to have kids. He thought about adopting but he was always so busy and his work was so dangerous that he never let that thought be anything more than that. A thought. Once he learns that Agent Phoenix has no family, he takes the role of father figure so seriously that he almost starts believing that he is Phoenix's biological father.

That's why it hurts him when he believes Agent Phoenix to actually be dead. He has never hurt more than the brief time after the Juniper incident when he thought Phoenix was actually gone. Nothing in his life had ever hurt that much.

[cowboy-robooty]

Robooty Reviews: Killer Crush (10/10) PERSONAL FAVORITE

Professional killer Joo Taeman has found himself completely head over heels with Korea's biggest heart throb actor Kang Da-Hyuk. Not to be confused with the average hobbyist serial killer, Joo Taemin's professional is his legitmate career and he has endured severe training mentally and physically his entire life to be up to the job. But suddenly he finds himself melting from the mere glance at Da-Hyuk's "boy next door" smile! This manhwa is packed to the brim with comedy and cute pannels. IF YOU LIKE ROBOOTY STYLE ITAGER YOU WILL LIKE THIS.

First review eeheehee! And whats more fitting than to continue this draft i made all the way back in March 2023? Dont expect proper summaries for the next ones lol. but ohhhh my god... this one is so good okay. ITS SO FUNNY AND AAUGWHHS ITS LIKE ROBOOTY ITAGER ADJACENT. LIKE FUCKING TRUST ME RN OKAY. THIS READS LIKE AN ITAGER AU TO ME ALRIGHT GUYS ITS NOT FULLY THE SAME OBVIOUSLY BUT IT HAS LIKE... COCAINE. COKE-HYENA! IF YOU LIKE THE SHIT I MAKE YOU WILL MOST DEFINATELY LIKE THIS!!!!!!

The romance is so cute too and ohh my god this art is to die for it's sooooo good.. I wish i drew as good as the author.... IM SO MAD THAT I DONT KNOW HOW TO ORDER THINGS USING A KOREAN WAREHOUSE ADDRESS BECAUSE THERES OFFICIAL PLUSHIES AND I WANTED ONE SOOOO FUCKING BAD AUGH **TEARING GRASS OUT OF THE EARF**

Anyways rn it's on hiatus because season 2 finished and I'm going to cry I need season 3... I wish there was a physical print of this PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE MAKE A PHYSICAL PRINT I WILL BUY EVERY SINGLE VOLUME. This is my first post and it's a 10/10 but no seriously guys. I dont give out 10/10s like candy alright. It's that good. This is unironically the only yaoi manga that I would feel comfortable recommending to anyone because its just a genuinely good comic. (It's not my all time favorite yaoi, but it holds second/third place with another manga I'll talk about later).

I love this shit. it's hilarious. I don't laugh often while reading yaoi (such a shame) or well even laugh often while reading manga (I need more comedy in mai life), but this made me laugh a whole lot. So good...... please read this I am begging you

[max1461]

I mean to be fair on your sister's behalf you do tend to say things that are under-researched and clearly coming from a POV limited to your fields of study and then immediately get hyped up by your followers for it. Not like an atrocious moral failing, but shows a lack of perspective tbh.

Often when you are on my dash you are "There's Max who didn't do the requisite research and said something kind of ignorant assuming their fields of study are the only topics at hand in this discussion." And it's sad because you do seem super fucking wise and well read when you actually know wtf you're talking about.

I think you didn't pick up that the whole thing was banter; my sister saying I wasn't wise was banter and then me asking my followers to disprove her was me including all you guys in the banter, it's a fun little game. It's fun to get a bit megalomaniacal with your internet persona and talk about how wise you are and shit but I don't actually believe I'm god's gift to the earth. We are just having silly fun on my blog.

A good 90% of my posts are not serious. They're either outright jokes and intentional absurdities (these are easy enough to spot), or they're elaborations on an intentionally silly premise (like when I talk about all countries being either "Americas" or "Europes"), or they're unironic but completely off the cuff, not assertions of some deeply held belief (like uh, that post I made recently speculating about Onision's psyche). Absolutely none of these posts are meant to be taken seriously, or to reflect in a genuine and thoughtful way how I view the world. And I do think I do a fairly good job of cordoning them off from my genuinely held viewpoints, both in terms of writing style and in terms of tagging/blog organization. I can sort of understand how you could get confused, because the internet is fully of people who say very silly things and mean them very seriously. But I think I've given everyone all the tools to distinguish my silly posts from my serious ones very reliably, so it falls on my readers to actually do that.