#u can start whenever
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It's funny how "you just need to be uncomfortable to grow and growing is a good thing that you should try to do in your life" is considered a "boomer-like" statement and how many people will genuinely respond with "sure but it's also valid if you don't want to do hard and uncomfortable things!"
DISCLAIMER: OBVIOUSLY THERE'S NUANCE
#'i mean i guess i see what youre saying but it's just so hard!' ok then stay where u are ig#like. you can#it doesnt make you less than. doesnt make u a bad person.#but you MUST understand if you refuse the choice to grow then others WILL outgrow you#they'll leave. they'll move on.#same with opportunities. they'll pass you by.#and if ur ok w that then that's fine it's ur life#but again. understand that other people will probably grow away from you. and they wont be wrong for it.#you wont be wrong for not growing either.#i think ppl get defensive because they have shame around not being where they feel theg 'should' be in life and i do get that#but at a certain point u rlly do have to get up and dig urself out of that hole..no matter how u got there#it's hard and it sucks and everyone has different circumstances but no one else is gonna save u or get u out#u gotta do it urself#u can start whenever#but the longer u say 'i'll do it when im ready' well..#sometimes u never feel ready...u just have to push thru and do it#:'/#i have sympathy but. idk i have thoughts too lol
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EVERY REASON (that i can think of) AS TO WHY TURBO/KING CANDY IS NEURODIVERGENT 💥💥
i would like to make a disclaimer first and foremost about the obvious, being that Turbo/King Candy is heavily implied to have narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) and antisocial personality disorder (ASPD). Very often, characters with these disorders are portrayed as villains, and Turbo is no exception to this. There's nothing wrong with antagonistic characters having said disorders, per se, but when the only representation available for people with these conditions are found in characters you're not supposed to root for, it can be really disheartening. i won't be erasing these parts of him because i feel it would be in poor taste to gloss over those core elements of who he is, but plz keep in mind that having any kind of personality disorder doesn't make anyone inherently evil!!!🌞 your ACTIONS make you, not your brain
Also if anyone has any suggestions or other ideas for his neurodiversity, i would love to hear them! please do share!! I LOVE PSYCHOANALYZING CHARACTERS AND HEARING OTHER PEOPLE PSYCHOANALYZE THEM !!!! YAY🎉 if u agree or disagree with any of my points I'd love to discuss them further :-]
without further ado... click read more to find out…😈 be ready for a lot of reaches
💥 ADHD 💥
STIMMING
Turbo's constantly moving around in some way; he's a very expressive character! even as King Candy, he can't seem to conceal his frequent giggling. it's a big habit of his; he seems to do it involuntarily to regulate himself, including when he's nervous or uncomfortable.
he seems to display other repetitive behaviors as well, like doing his iconic thumbs-up pose, sticking out his tongue, or hopping around gleefully. he is but a jovial court jester..
i personally like to think that his phrases, "Turbo-tastic!" and "Have some candy!" are vocal stims of his, although i equally really love the interpretation that these (and the aforementioned stims) are tics :-]
another headcanon; i think it would make a lot of sense for him to have an oral fixation of some sort (ignoring the whole sigmund freud part of the term ermm...); just lots of biting, chewing, needing to have something in his mouth. It would align with the whole idea that he smokes, too
HYPERACTIVITY
we can clearly see throughout the film that Turbo has a lot of energy, made abundantly clear by his mannerisms and general behavior. he's constantly moving, using exaggerated expressions and gestures to communicate + express himself. He's one of the most animated and bouncy characters in the movie, next to Vanellope! it's silly how a character not very grounded in reality is such a threat, but i suppose that's what makes him so threatening in the first place...
another factor in this is how he is very adrenaline-seeking, craving activities that give him a rush (sugar rush...😂😂). more on that in a bit!!
HYPERFIXATION
Turbo's fixation with winning is all-consuming for him; it's an obsession. he doesn't appear to care about much else, if anything besides it. this could be interpreted as a hyperfixation for him (or special interest if ur all about that autism lifestyle), as it overtakes all of his focus and impedes every process of his mind.
it's clear that racing is much more than a passion for him, and while that fact is due to how he was programmed, it's a major character trait of his regardless that could be correlated to neurodivergence.
HYPERFOCUS
There seems to be a big theme of "all or nothing" when it comes to Turbo. he will either be fully dedicated to something or brush it aside without a second thought. it can't be denied that he fully wraps himself up in what he wants, whether it's a conflict he can't let go of or a new pursuit he's hungrily chasing after.
ultimately, his dedication varies depending on if it is relevant to him and his interests or not, but this aspect of him still shares patterns with neurodivergent thought processes.
INSTANT GRATIFICATION
Seeing as he has a tendency to cheat in his use of code to spawn in whatever his heart desires, it can be assumed that this could do with Turbo wanting instant gratification to fill that bitter, empty void inside of him. while this could simply be brushed aside as greed and his belief that he is obligated to have access to whatever he wants, this trait is consistent with his generally dopamine-seeking behavior and wanting to be instantly rewarded by his actions. His obsession with needing to feel good directly relates to his need for another buzz, constantly after the next rush. (a sugar rush if you will☺☺☺)
ADRENALINE-SEEKING
Closely related to the previous speculation, Turbo always seems to be chasing his next high. he loves the thrill of action and being surrounded by crowds of people below him. it's why his big thing is racing! people cheer him on, he can do whatever he wants, he can go really fast and look cool..
it's possible that a big aspect of why he does this is to distract himself from any kind of pain, because pain = vulnerability. bro does NOT know how to independently cope with his own problems.. HE MAD AS HELLLLL!!! 😂😂
STRUGGLE WITH SELF CARE
(i know this is reaching but bear with me... 🐻) going off of his appearance and tendency to make poor decisions, it can be gathered that this man lacks skill in the self care department. his yellowing teeth and sunken eyes not only serve to complement his design, but also give way to the idea that he neglects himself in favor for whatever weird scheme he's up to.
of course, Turbo does prioritize himself above everyone else, but he doesn't strike me as the type to care much about how others think he smells. him being a bother to anyone isn't a concern of his. he cares about whatever gets him the most praise and attention from as many people as possible, which is winning and racing. Who cares about how clean he is when he's up on a podium holding a shiny, golden trophy, anyway?
It's likely that he had to step his game up when he went under disguise as king candy, which is why he looks well-groomed in comparison to his more corpse-like appearance. Ugly hoe. it can also be assumed that he's had more time to focus on himself because everyone loves him without question... Well, except for Vanellope, but who cares about her, right?
also, i know he makes a condescending comment to Ralph about how bad his breath smells, but it's made abundantly clear that Turbo is a massive hypocrite. his comment doesn't erase the possibility that he has suffered from such "halitosis" as well.
💥 ANXIETY 💥
GENERAL ANXIOUS BEHAVIOR
i know, i know, this could technically be chalked up to be "Turbo is nervously giggling and shit because he's scared of getting caught," but guys. g
even in the flashback scene, we can see how easily stressed he can become in an alarmingly short period of time. he is extremely insecure, therefore i am led to believe he is not only emotionally dysregulated, but also by extension, anxiety ridden.
yes, this is purely speculative, but who's to say that he wasn't like this before? being high-strung and intense are significant facets of his personality consistently portrayed throughout the film. as long as he is getting exactly what he wants, he is happy; the moment he loses even a blip of control, however, he immediately grows extremely tense.
if Turbo wasn't anxious about his disguise as King Candy before, he was anxious about how much attention he was receiving on a given day. if not that, then he'd be anxious over how he presents himself. He hates how he can't control how other people perceive him, which is why he is constantly trying to act like he's better than he is.
its why he justifies his behavior to himself, proudly making others refer to him as the "rightful ruler" of sugar rush and relishing in the attention of his countless underlings. Any secure and stable person would NOT ACT LIKE THIS!!!!😭😭😭
FIGHT OR FLIGHT
As we can see a handful of times on screen, Turbo's instinct to protect himself is very easily activated.
his fear manifests in anger and aggression. we can see at multiple points how easy it is to upset him or fluster him; his anger is one side of the same coin, the opposite end being his fear and paranoia.
Going off of this point, have you noticed that Turbo is either satisfied or furious without much of an in-between? how the second something isn't under his manipulation, he lashes out and fights back? I'm led to believe that this is how he responds to fear (AAUAAYAUUUUGGHHH 🐡🐡🐡🐡🐡🐡🐡). This guy is so against the idea of being vulnerable, that even when afraid, he will utilize violence to regain his dominance over the situation at hand.
CONTROL + PARANOIA
Turbo's always trying to writhe or fight his way out of uncomfortable situations, unable to exist outside of his comfort zone for seconds at a time.
his defensive, paranoid, and controlling behavior are all reflections of how deeply insecure this man is. He feels such an intense need for everything to go exactly how he expects it to go that the moment he senses any kind of threat, he instantly jumps to defend himself and what he feels that he has "earned," regardless of whether there truly is a threat or not.
this could potentially be a coping mechanism for his anxiety and sense of stability; can't forget to mention how territorial he is!! he jumps to conclusions about what others' intentions are before they even get a chance to reply, as seen with his first encounter with Ralph in the movie.
the racer is so internally discombobulated that he seeks any sense of stability on his environment, including on those around him. his sense of self is so warped that he copes with constant distraction; being under the spotlight, being actively racing, having to be showered with attention, having others make him feel good because he doesn't know how to do it for himself. he needs to feel like everything is under control, lest everything falls apart.
"...if there's ONE thing I can't abide, it's ANYTHING out of order!"
💥 NPD 💥
INFLATED SENSE OF SELF IMPORTANCE
Turbo's most in-your-face trait above all else. It's made more than crystal clear in every scene he's in that his arrogance is a determining factor in how he interacts with others. This is exactly what drives him to desperately crave admiration, to chase after others he's envious of because he thinks he is obligated to take what they have.
he seems to genuinely think he is entitled to get whatever he wants, just because he is inherently "special" or "better" than everyone else. Why else would he have made himself a king, a step above princess?
EXCESSIVE NEED FOR ADMIRATION
Turbo's self worth is COMPLETELY dependent on the opinions of children and teenagers. I think i don't need to say any more than that, but i will. (Evil).
As cartoonishly massive as his ego is, i think that it's fair to assume that Turbo has a very unstable sense of self, distorting his perception of his own worth down with it. his near-constant flaunting and need to be the best is a dead giveaway to his deeply-ridden self-doubt. The foundation of his stability is built around how "good" he is (at racing and winning), how powerful he is, whether or not he is being prioritized above everyone else, whether or not he is the absolute best, etc. etc.
The racer outright manipulates others to shower him with admiration and undeserved appreciation. He is incapable of forming a true sense of internal value, instead heavily and codependently relying on others to form it for him. if he isn't the best, he may as well just be nothing.
INTENSE JEALOUSY
He reacts so severely to what he perceives as others taking away what is rightfully his that it only goes to solidify my previous points even further. the second someone else is getting more attention than him, Turbo will bend over backwards to rip back the praise he believes he so rightly deserves.
being extremely competitive, he will one-up against anyone he thinks of as a threat, dedicating himself to taking them down to the best of his ability, and making sure they STAY down to top it all off.
INABILITY TO HANDLE CRITICISM
if we really dissect the entire one-off joke with Turbo insisting that his stolen pink castle is actually "salmon," along with all of his other domineering behaviors, we can garner that he is very persistent in how he wants others to view him. i wholeheartedly believe that this would translate into him not only being defensive over his supposed "ownership" of Sugar Rush, but also over himself and his own insecurities.
He needs to feel good about himself or else he will die and quite literally try to kill everyone.
LACK OF EMPATHY
He appears to have a fondness for making jokes in very poor taste. Turbo has a big sense of humor, but it's always at the expense of others. Be it a pun about a "fungeon," or jumping to protect himself with a joke about "hitting a guy with glasses," he has a tendency to take serious situations very lightly. It's not that he's unaware of the weight of it; he simply doesn't take it Seriously.
its admittedly impressive how he was able to feign empathy so well for Ralph; it goes to show how he is very capable of understanding that what he's doing is wrong, but ultimately does nothing to change his behavior because it doesn't impact him personally.
i would like to honor this part of him, because even in the possible alternate path of a redemption arc, his struggle with empathy can be explored in a variety of interesting ways :-] he can understand complicated emotions and situations on an analytical level, but he doesn't feel for them unless it has to do with him specifically. (this obviously doesn't make him inherently evil, his ACTIONS make him evil)
💥 ASPD 💥
LACK OF REMORSE/GUILT
One of Turbo's core characteristics is just how far he is willing to go for his own self-interest with lack of regard for how it impacts everyone else. he has absolutely no concern for how anyone else feels besides himself, willing to go so far as to attempt to mutilate a 9-year-old to achieve his petty goals.
Turbo is shameless when it comes to how he goes about getting his way. While I'd like to believe he isn't fully incapable of feeling regret, he doesn't showcase feeling it in the movie itself. The most regret he'll feel is when he slips up and exposes himself. anything else is the fault of everyone else; he is untouchable in his eyes.
DECEITFUL TENDENCIES + LYING
Where do i even start with this one.
well, first of all, let's acknowledge the... erm, horse? in the room? 🐎😅(Please someone help me there is a horse in my room help helphel) being that Turbo went under disguise as King Candy for at least a decade. Even before this, there's a good chance that he's already had plenty of experience with lies and manipulation. i'd be willing to bet on this!!
one of his specialties is being proficient in manipulation, be it the code of games or the minds of people. theyre basically the same thing to him, anyway... I'm sure you all know the scene where he uses 16 manipulation tactics against Ralph and wins. this was Obviously not the first time he'd done this.
REPETITION OF HARMFUL BEHAVIORS
Time and time again, Turbo can't seem to help himself when it comes to poor decision-making. he never internalizes that his bad choices aren't JUST bad for others, but also for himself, continuing to escalate further and further into very dangerous behaviors until he literally dies.
Here's a list of bad decisions he has made! (at least, that we know of)
Pinning himself above his peers
Harassment + stalking
Carelessly charging through GCS with his car, endangering countless civilians
Attempting to take over a game that isn't his x2
Vehicular manslaughter
Implied mass murder + attempted murder, attempted mutilation
Mass endangerment
Breaking and entering, theft, usurpation, plagiarism
and more!!!!!!!
AND HE LEARNS FROM ABSOLUTELY NONE OF THIS!!! with some of the items listed here, he's attempted to do multiple times! Absolute buffoon.
RECKLESS DISREGARD FOR SAFETY OF SELF AND OTHERS
Considering how he was willing to charge into a game that wasn't his own with the awareness that it could permanently kill him, going as far as to recklessly crash into another car (albeit it's possible this was unintentional), it's easy to gather that he doesn't seem to consider anyone's safety at all in the spur of the moment.
IMPULSITIVITY
his impulsivity and disregard for safety both go hand-in-hand. When it gets to a certain point, Turbo's emotions will boil over and blow up in a cold rage, thus causing him to spiral and act on impulse, becoming a detrimental force to himself as well as everyone around him.
What's interesting is how much restraint he is capable of; he typically is very strategic in how he orchestrates his plans! but once he reaches his breaking point, he snaps and leaves all of his hard work behind in favor of something that calls for his immediate attention.
💥 ETC. 💥
extra tidbits i didnt have enough energy to fully delve into :-]
BPD
Fear of abandonment
Blurry sense of identity
Feelings of emptiness
Self destructive tendencies
Emotional instability
Explosive anger
ODD (oppositional defiant disorder)
He seems so infatuated with his own autonomy that he gets to the point of being resistant and defiant
Resisting against the rules of the world that he directly caused as a result of his own actions, being that one shouldn't "go Turbo."
Enjoys upsetting/getting a rise out of others. this is more speculative as i am going off of the assumption that he thinks pissing people off is funny, based on his other behavioral patterns. (cruel sense of humor, wanting to feel above others via control & manipulation, enjoyment of inflicting pain onto others)
Forcefully defends himself and refuses any kind of criticism
Lashes out when he feels slighted
Excessive persistence despite all odds, whether it's beneficial to him or not
ok bye!! thank you if you managed to read this far ^^ peace and love take care of yourself! all in all turbo is so neurodivergent ok please Okay <3 get this thing his meds
#flashing lights#<- ??#eyestrain#smoking mention#obligatory i don't support disney ⚠️#ITS FINALLY DONE OHHHH DEAR GOARD!!!!! I DID IT#i am COOKING SO hard#I HATE TURBO.#you have no idea what kinds of agony i had to undergo to make this post. i went thru more than the average veteran#accidentally posted this entire thing THREEEE TIIIIMES before it was finished and lost the drafts in the process. we persevere....#the people need to know about why turbo is neurodivergent(IMPORTATNT!!!)!!!!(!!!!!!!)#yeah yeah he did a lot of bad things but turbo is neurodivergent it wasnt his fault! its ok guys!#watch me kin him and ship myself with him at the same time#long post#character analysis#turbo#turbo wir#turbo wreck it ralph#king candy#king candy wir#king candy wreck it ralph#im melting him with a magnifying glass on the concrete until he is but a small grimy stain#Gyys start licking...... we can still save him#Hes a chew toy to me. Or stress toy.#Sorry ok ok ill stop rambling he just makes me sillayy🤪#ok i lied. whenever i think about him too hard i start shaking#churning him into a thick paste to spread onto a sandwich of sorts. tastes like old gummy sweets & diesel fuel with a hint of cigarette ash#i love being long winded and going on and on and on about stupid little assholes liek this guy#the countless essays i have written about him. u have no idea#wreck it ralph
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if anyone asks
tell them ive ascended to heaven
#WHAT THE FUCKSVSHISBSKD#OFFICIAL HSR MV ??????? STOP IM ACTUALLY CRYING WHY DID THIS MAKE ME EMOTIONAL#OURGH ROBIN AND SUNDAY MY BELOVEDS !!!!! AVENTURINE YOU !!!! SPARKLE LOML !!!!! BLACK SWAN ?!??!? GALLAGHER !!!!! ACHERON MY LOVE !!!!!#AND SAMPO MY LOVE YOU AAAAA#DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED ON FIREFLY AND MC ?????? LIKE STOP THEIR SCENES ARE SO SO PRETTY AND THE WAY THE SONG SOFTENED WHEN WE SAW THEM#THE MUSIC IS SO !!!!!! AND THE FACT ITS IN ALL 4 LANGUAGES TOO LIKE HELLO WHAT THEY ALL SOUND DIVINE ????#AMVS WHO FR 😭😭#stop im not ready for penacony i cant believe 2.0 is in a little under 2 weeks like how am i supposed to cope until then ???#all the qol updates and the free 20 pulls…. sobbing hsr my love my life my destiny ……. i will give u my bank whenever u want …….#they have it out on spotify and u can bet ur ass im already looping it and will continue to do so for the next 6 months#AT LEAST#god the vocals …. the cinematography …… the vibes …… i cabt everything is so perfect …….#interstellar journey 2.0 and my god im so glad theyve done it again and will most likely do it for new worlds/regions in the future 😩🫶#may this journey lead us starward <3
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"Crystal Cipher... What do you want from me?!"
Au where crystal and merriweather trade places with bill and ford. It doesn't work if u think abt it for 2 seconds but it's fun to draw!
Crystal is so silly with bills personality....
Scene references below the cut
Yes i got it from a yt video its why the background n everything looks like crap :waaa
#I might draw other scenes if someone asks/if i want to#Can u tell whenever i started getting tired#gravity falls oc#gravity falls au#Gravity falls#I can hear crystal saying bills lines so vividly....#Oc: Crystal Cipher#oc: merriweather#art#artists on tumblr#artwork#digital art#digital drawing#digital illustration#my art#oc art#my ocs#Oc
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aki with happy trail. perhaps even running your fingers over aki's happy trail. that's all
#I did a poll a long while ago asking what u think akis shaving procedure is#and I'm pretty sure the winner was no shave happy trail#and.... yeah.......#he's very cleanly#but he'd just let everything grow out#although I can picture him shaving whenever you first start dating#he's like trying to impress you and all#he doesn't know what you like yet
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Short clip of Malroth having the zoomies
Had a longer one too
#dqb2#dragon quest builders 2#dqb2 malroth#malroth#I opened up the wall to add a new room to our house#and he started running back and forth#i think he's excited about the new room#you can actually hear him leaving and entering the house through the door whenever he's offscreen >u<
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I binged this webtoon today and yesterday and it's rly good i like it sm... "your wings and mine"
I didnt know what to expect going in(i keep my hopes low tbh) but I kept getting impressed w the writing... it's rly funny but also surprisingly emotional, it has me laughing out loud 1 moment and then crying the next and then laughing my ass off again... there's a lot of silliness but the serious moments don't feel out of place or cheesy at all bc they did such a good job of building the charas up to that point... and the genuine and heartfelt exchanges btwn the charas are simple but surprisingly feel fresh? like the writer was lowkey galaxy braining writing these kcdnfj And they actually did such a good job w the slow burn romance, it's so sweet and cute and fun to watch grow... 😭 i'm caught up now and im sad i need more
#i decided a while back i would post whenever i found a good webtoon bc ik they're hard to come by#i start a lot of webtoons on a whim but theres only v few that i would actually rec to ppl#and... i like this one enough to rec it!!#and its not daily pass or anything so u can binge it woo~#webtoon#webtoon recommendation#your wings and mine#ywam#the slow burn romance buildup was so sweet and cute aughh im sad bc theyre in a breakup arc rn orz#i just want them to be happy#oh and its also interesting bc... the pacing and humor honestly felt a lot like a kor webtoon to me?? even tho its in en#even some of the lines i could picture the kor for it...lowkey wish there was actually a kor tl so i could rec to my kor friends lol#edit: i was wondering why the icon was so small instead of a banner and ITS CANVAS??? not an original???#genuinely shocked... it should be an original its better than a lot of originals damn. webtoon needs to pay them#it has 26.7mil views and over 300k subs...
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hot take maybe but I think we should drop the whole 'don't reupload my cc objects with your builds' thing, you're still being credited if you put your username in the filename, nobody is claiming it as their own, sure there's no clickable link back to your page but like....... who cares
#shells.txt#shellsea feels like barking today#just wanna include a seperate .zip file with all the cc used with my builds godDAMn#whenever I start posting object conversions y'all can literally do whatever u want ok i do not care#i dont believe in terms of use when it comes to objects for a game i have no ownership of
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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damn I yap a lot
tldr; im alive, sadly im still on hiatus, other stuff is fine now I just have new [physical] problems, you'll know when I'm fully back (give it another couple months) and comfortable, I'm in a [technically well-over] 3-month long ongoing depressive episode [not tryna do trauma olympics or make anyone feel bad btw it's all chill]
so sorry if I've left you hanging [with art or smth], I'll get to it in time, I promise [I may have unwillingly forgotten, likely not but there's a chance]
Hey, I'm alive, I have been for the.. almost 6 months I've been gone. Holy shit, I didn't even realise that it's been that long. I figured I should at least say something in case anyone is worried or wondering even though everything isn't solved yet, so, here. [under the read more so it's not flooding or anything]
Also, I figure I should apologise for venting on main and just leaving it up - this is all going to stay up because I need to keep it somewhere to aid with my memory issues - but, still, must've been a little weird
Absolutely not a good time to say all this [for me bc I haven't thought this message through] but I'm kinda half-back, just on hiatus from socials due to declining physical health. Really badly declining, I need help honestly
Originally, as you know, I was gone because I had a really bad fall out with my mother, but things pertaining to that have been solved now [except me not feeling 100% safe and trusting to my mother, that will never change. She's tried hard, I just wish I could find her reliable emotionally as well]. It's just that, since then, basically, all these physical problems that I don't understand have been royally fucking me up and messing with my mental too. It's messed with everything I love. I don't know what to do anymore.
Oh wait, where I was actually going with this, so
OK nvm I forgot but you'll see me around bc I've been talking to certain people trying to pretend like nothing's happened and I've made the kinda-silly decision to not fully come off hiatus or talk to other certain people before I'm okay again.
#so the post is for the practical stuff n the tags r for emotional btw [or at least I tried to do that]#[yeah just except the para starting with “originally” I'll keep that there despite being unnecessary]#-#genuinely. im so scared. im so scared all the time [most of the time not scared of anything in particular - I mean the physical problems#fuck me up by making me scared and sad and tired most of the time for no reason]#I have no energy and it's all up and down and even though I actually feel okay rn [not good but okay] after literally breaking down an hour#ago I still know this shouldn't be happening#nobody is going to believe me if I say I have high-functioning depression. who do I tell. well they will believe me but how would it help#and I'm so scared to tell anyone for no reason. I'm not scared mentally rn but no matter whether or not Im ok the emotion stops me from#taking action if that makes sense.#--#I don't understand what I did to deserve this why is this happening to me#why are these internal problems out of my control happening to me#I don't understand and it truly deeply scares me#---#I meant to out this at the start of the tags but fuck it I'm too far in and on mobile to go all the way back now#thank you if you read this far. truly thank you because I need someone to talk to and my irl's are not an option for all different reasons#if I reach out to you about smth random please talk to me as if I'm still not half-gone.#feel free to message me whenever about wtv despite the “hiatus” I need it#... if you have read this far for whatever reason please text me that my Rui loves me my brain is trying to guilt me and say he doesn't#[that just happens when I'm in a certain state even tho that's when I need Rui the most selfship mutuals u get it pls help me out]#he. he does love me right? I swear he does I just. can't seem to believe it right now#I shouldn't have pushed all that to the bottom when it was directly telling my mutuals what I need lol#I feel a little hopeless sometimes. that's not like me I'll be alright in the end. no not that. I'll be better than alright I can fix this#I can fix this. I just need help. god I need help.#at the very least I'll be alright
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Hi i'm shy so I'm putting this on anon BUT i just need you to know that your tsumugi is one of my favorite tsumugi's of all time. You just draw him so perfectly??? His curls in particular look so right and it makes me so happy when I see him on my dash or one of my mutuals sends me your art. I HOPE YOU HAVE A GOOD DAY!!!
sobs first off, i'm overwhelmed that you regard my version of tsumugi so highly and that ppl are sharing it around !! it makes me want to combust into dust a little /pos
second, would you believe me if i told you i have observed tsumugi's hair so much that i actually have a favorite part lmao
i think i'm biased though bc i adore curly/wavy hair so much and i have an excuse to make it seem like waves for no reason so tsumugi is my current outlet of enjoyment rn (they get all the attention)
#i'm so glad happyele implemented a fitting room because i can rotate their charas whenever (also it makes drawing them a little easier)#i was also realizing that when i draw his hair it borderline starts to like kusakabe from doukyuusei whoops#anyway anon sorry fr rambling and thank u <3#letters#anonymous
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Spooky Day Party!
Tricks and treats were had by all!
Dakota made ghost cookies for everyone, which they all seemed to enjoy. He also got to show off his sick mixology skills!
All the contestants seemed to be having fun at the party and took some time to interact with one another and deepen some friendships.
When asking for a treat, Rory got a little trick from an impish Clive, while Cisco got some candy from Lucky.
Towards the end of the party, while everyone was dancing away the last of their energy, Levi went and got his ass handed to him by the beer keg lmao.
@rainymoodlet @mangosimoothie @hazelsnakes @bibliosims @m0ckest @acuar-io @mobwhim @fizzytoo
Last post for a little bit! I'm too busy atm to play so we're having a little hiatus
#not pictured: me having to make everyone stop cross stitching whenever they would start lmao#theyre all old ladies#lmk if u can guess everyones costumes!!#crbc#dakota blue heron#chestnutbc#crbc: mauro#crbc: asher#crbc: lucky#crbc: rory#crbc: cisco#crbc: levi#crbc: clive#crbc: xolo#z
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more silly little cats in my notebook. first pic has Breezy, her bestie Lily, her partner Thrush, their new beans, and their friend Ripple. second page has the village's doctor Doe who is still pretty new and feeling overwhelmed, but her friend Albatross helps her feel better.
#g drawin#pixel cats end#pce art#god damn im COOKING but in the LINED NOTEBOOK 💔#featuring smol clovers and a smol chrys#i think im starting to settle into a style for drawing kitties and its really fun ^w^#i just keep doodling em whenever im on a break at work#can u tell i like breezy a lot
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hiiii
at the last few anons ive gotten! i dont answer asks about copying/similar post styles even if it was worded kindly - it just feels silly and usually sends hate to the person it was about SO please don’t send them! thank you for trying to look out but at most its just flattering to me and i enjoy posts similar to mine!
#dl#like you want to copy ME???? thank u#and usually i fall in love with their blogs and weirdly enough i feel like its the first step for some blogs to find their own groove#whenever i was like 14 and started this blog im almost positive thats how i started#i saw pretty pictures and wanted to take pictures JUST like that and then eventually i found my own way to do things!#anyways im gonna go buy a new blender so i can copy this smoothie stores wonderful recipe at home
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🎃 Good evening, creatures and critters! It's that time of year again! My blog is open for trick-or-treating tonight~! 🎃
[ ring the bell ]
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Michael Jordan taking a picture of isiah thomas coddling and carrying an embarrassed grown 6'7 Dennis Rodman around
#isiah definitely has Things up with him#but the moment u tell him ure neurodivergent he treats u like an infant#the moment the ppl sitting next to u start laughing he holds ur hand and whispers how it's not at u#these are random strangers who started laughing bcs their friend just told a joke and rveryone can see that#some random white girl says shes 'spazzing out' n u raise ur eyebrow bcs it's outdated but otherwise u rlly dont care#but isiah pets ur hand and says 'that wasnt at you. you're not a spaz. or a [rslur]' with the biggest smile on his face#he will now bring up the fact that he has an autism friend whenever he can shove himself into neurodivergent spaces & speak for them#*speak Over them*#when u stutter or fumble with ur speech just a tiny bit bcs it's 7 in the morning & u just slammed a beer last night#he will give u the most pitying look possible not in the i know how that feels way but awww u poor thing#ur brain born too hurty wurty for normal words like me :(#meanwhile he has like 999000000000000 undiagnosed illness and 1000000000 disorders
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