#two parent household

[classycookiexo]

They always leave that part out

[xtrablak674]

I am, was Low-Key Ashamed of My Dad

Not for the obvious reasons, how he looked or acted but for something more simple. He never worked! As I was doing my yoga this morning for some reason I was thinking of his lack of jobs the entire twenty years that I knew him. These thoughts may have been coloured by the author Ayaz Virji, who said he associated his dad with the words, I have to work. Well my father never did.

There are a few things we need to clarify, first I never called my father dad, he was alway very ambiguous about how I should address him and this left me forever confused about our relationship especially when he attempted to actually put on his parental pants. In my head I thought you can't have this both ways, being my friend, on a pedestal, worshipped and being a parent, you need to choose. But he never did and this kept our relationship in a very nebulous and confusing state.

Secondly, he was raised in a middle-class Christian household by two very devout and hard-working parents. The class difference between my father and mom was palpable, this only became more apparent as I came closer to adulthood. My father's parents had, and my mom's mother and family didn't have.

He was bought up in a stable two-parent household with one sibling and an abundance of cousins and aunts and uncle around. For a Black man his upbringing was nearly idyllic. He was highly intelligent testing on near genius levels and his school work was completed easily and always with the highest grades. His dad took the family on trips in their big American-made cars and he really wanted for nothing as he grew up along-side his special needs brother.

Lastly, he was a veteran of the Vietnam war, as I recall he had one promotion but then was demoted for being himself and defiant of authority, a theme that would continue through out his life. He was a radio operator in the infantry which had him on the front lines and put him in the perilous place of being exposed to Agent Orange along with his fellow soldiers, this key event and war would lead to the rest of his life being filled with visits to the Veteran's Administration, constant mental and physical pain, unemployment and ultimately his death alone in his Harlem apartment.

What had him on my mind this morning was recollecting that once he had asked me to find him a job at the theatre I was working at. I think I was maybe nineteen at the time possibly twenty and had decided that I wanted to work in the theatre as a career and being the very focused and diligent young person I was I took the steps to do just that.

I attended the High School for Performing Arts as a Drama major, where in my senior year while I stage-managed our double female cast of The Odd Couple for our Spring Drama Festival, I was also an intern at the Roundabout Theatre Company, and stage managing a small off off Broadway production set to premier on theatre row.

For college I was in the Theatre Management program with a minor in dance. I was doing every and all things to make sure that I was filling my newly formed resume with as many theatre credits as possible could, and to get as much experience as for the career I wanted in the theatre.

Then here comes this man whom I had never known to hold even the simplest job, wanting me to find him employment at the company where I was doing my Summer internship making a sixty-five dollar stipend per week, and living with my junior high school friend because his mother had kicked me out of my grandparents home while I was in college. I will repeat, I was made homeless while I was in college by his parents and he wanted me to help him get a job.

I don't usual cus in these journal entries, but GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE! #👏🏿

I told him I would not, and at the time felt a bit bad about that. Because I guess this was his attempt to get work, but we lived in New York City, and the only place for him to find work was at the Off Broadway theatre where his eldest child was working? #really

I was embarrassed and ashamed beyond words at just the thought of him working alongside me in the same place I did with young people who were all my contemporaries. How would this much older person have even fit in? If I could have I would have just dissolved into a puddle and sunk into the floorboards. How did he think that was even a fair request to ask of me?

As I have written in these entries previously I had surpassed both my parents having worked from the time I was fifteen till roughly forty. I don't think I could ever surpass my mom's work ethic, she was very focused on providing for her three young children and I have never had progeny and have never been influenced in that same way.

I always knew if I was going to work, I was going to be paid for using my mind, not my back. And that I would have one job or career and be paid well for it, which for the bulk of my work experience was exactly the case. Outside of the Census I haven't really worked in the last ten years, but don't feel even remotely regretful about that because my lack of work has nothing to do with my ability but the intersectionalities of identities and how they are perceived along with some of the classics like ageism, colorism and your garden variety racism.

I can admit as an adult who has been on the planet even longer than my father ever was, that mental health issues are real, that physical and mental pain are very real. But the origin of my shame and resentment towards my father is the fact that I don't really think he tried enough to get the help that he needed, and I will forever be disappointed in the man he could have been versus the man that he was. His parents did their best by him, and the rest were the kind of choices he made, never feeling like he deserved the life that was potentially laid out before him.

As a former self-sabotageur I understand how sometimes we can be our own worse enemies. I have also never fought in a war, and never will. But I understand that it is possible to overcome the traumas of the past and figure out a way to make a living for yourself and your family, my father never even attempted.

[Photo by Brown Estate]

[vngful]

[serpentface]

Don't get too attached

[citrlet]

scenes from the burkhart ranch

[slavicafire]

it's so funny when you feel a sudden strange wave of sadness at a random midnight - and after a moment of introspection you can pinpoint exactly why. and it's because you miss the electrician

[natolesims]

Emile, as always, is a thorn in our side. What his plans are? We cannot know. The only thing we know for sure is that he's up to no good.

[essektheylyss]

how are BOTH of my parents now in the duolingo diamond league. why is my family LIKE THIS

[only-one-brain-cell]

Someone’s gonna have to pry these two from my cold dead hands.

[greenerteacups]

Hi GT, I hope you are doing well! who is your favorite Weasley?

Thank you! Absolute treat of a question. Oh, man. It's Ron, right? It was always going to be Ron.

So here's the thing: the Weasleys are a really well-characterized family in that you can kind of see a lot of character emerge through limited sketches and contextual information. Bill is Number One Boy, the best at everything, oldest child who was always confident and at peace with his indisputable place in the family; so he's a chill, cool, incredibly competent guy who naturally takes-charge. Charlie is a patented never-grew-out-of-your-middle-school-dragons-phase Weird Kid, but like, mindfully and enthusiastically so, because his parents probably still had plenty of time to support and nurture his interests; plus he's also different to Bill and excels in different ways, so they aren't too competitive (as we see). Percy is the first one to suffer from the pressure of mounting expectations, and he's very quickly followed by the twins, who do the classic "if I can't be the best I'll be the worst" late-sibling trick of acting up for attention, so he gets lost in the shuffle. (The fight between Ron and Percy in Chapter 58 is, hence, in substantially about the relationship between the two most-ignored members of the Weasley family, and that's why Ron is so much angrier at him than the rest of them. Like I've said before, Ron always thinks he's got it the worst, but he takes pride in being able to kinda "tough it out," and nothing pisses him off like other people's self-pity.) Ginny is obviously the baby of the family, a girl with everyone wrapped around her finger, and I love her, but I feel like we didn't get enough grit in her portrait— she's just really successful in everything she does, in a way that can read as flat to some people, and certainly read as flat to me my first time through the books. In fact, Ginny reminds me a lot of Bill: first daughter/first son, described often as "cool" and clever and good at basically everything, charming and generally liked by all. Which is lovely. A delight to read, just like the twins are. But my taste in characters ranges way more fucked-up and mean.

Ron is the last boy, "sixth son of a woman who wanted a daughter" (fascinating line that complicates everything we know about Molly's relationship with her kids — and BTW, how the hell does Ron know that, and how old was he when he learned it? And this also comes into play with Molly's cry of "not my daughter" to Bellatrix which like, as a moment obviously fucking rules, but also — there's a reason she says daughter, not "child," right? Do you see what I'm digging at? Anyway). Ron meets Harry and recognizes himself in how Harry defaults to thinking people don't care about him, or won't help him if he asks, because — although they come from very different circumstances, Ron's home was completely loving, just not as nurturing as he always needed it to be — Ron usually goes in assuming people don't care about him, too. So his first instinct is to go: "Alright. Well, I'll care about you, then, weird stranger. Do you want to share my horrible sandwich, and also my life, perhaps?" Goddamn! Sixth of seven in a house with never enough to go around, and he's immediately like: "fuck it, room for one more." Because he could have been Percy — and you can see it in the way that Ron is mean, sometimes, he's not careful with his words and he struggles with empathy and he's got a vengeful streak that comes out when he's pissed — but he isn't selfish enough, he loves too much and too easily, and it takes shockingly little to earn his loyalty. You just have to pay a little attention to him.

[binsandcans]

A taciturn billionaire, a mild-mannered reporter and the sharpest kid you'd ever see.

[cdyssey]

Callie has spent her entire life well-aware that she could never live up to one ghost; it was so upsetting that you could see the exact moment when it dawned on her that she's always been haunted by another.

She got it instantly—how doomed her family was from the very start.

[damndude69]

.

[catsinmugs]

for the rest of my life i will be taking screenshots of the same animations for EACH AND EVERY new baby

[varpusvaras]

Had a talk with wife last night about the fact that neither of us really wants to be called "mom" in the future, and instead we wish for our kids to call us by our first names. I'm curious now:

[pynkhues]

https://www.tumblr.com/pynkhues/769063810095087616/im-curious-about-your-thoughts-on-something-i?source=share

Okay this whole post just blew my mind

Ahaha, I hope in a good way!