#tw self-injury

[everyone-loves-you]

TW: Self-harm content

Not my art!!

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Found this gorgeous peice on reddit by the user ArtificialGrandma (u/ArtificialGrandma), and I wanted to share!♡

[fissions-chips]

Angsty Shit: Pt 4

WINGS. Just… an assortment of wing-related angst.

Wings are so lovely to have. They’re warm, give the gift of flight, and make cuddling with your loved ones oh-so-wonderful. They are also deliciously fragile.

Tim’s wings, broad and black-feathered, permanently left in a state of disrepair after the Arctic. Not only did he break them when the ship went down, stripping him of flight forever, but the smoke, fire and saltwater left his feathers in tatters. When he is eventually rescued, they resemble torn rags more than the beautiful wings he had once had. It takes months upon months for them to even start to heal again.

During his captivity, perhaps his feathers were clipped, or ripped out by cruel hands, grounding him in horrible, humiliating fashion. Perhaps even taken, plucked from him and stashed away in an act of obsession…

Little Foxy constantly shielding Tim under his wings like a hen with a chick, hiding him from cruel words and crueler blows. Always a shaken, startled child, his wings kept tight to his back lest they get grabbed to get his attention or make a painful point. Even in adulthood, he rarely spreads them, instinctively trying to make himself smaller.

In kind, Butler having actually spent many a night with aching, battered wings of his own as a consequence of his training- though he had no brother to comfort him. It was ‘to be expected’, such things. How else would one make the perfect bodyguard?

Tim or Butler in battle, throwing their enemies out of the sky, meeting in a clash of feathers and beating wings. Left afterwards with missing feathers and blood-splattered wings, the ‘arms’ of them slashed and torn by their opponents’ talons. When the adrenaline fades, they seem so, so heavy, and it is all they can do to drag them behind them as they retreat to their safehouse.

Tim, in times of great stress (such as post-TAI, after Artemis’s ‘deaths’, post-the Fowl Jet crashing, etc.) tearing out his own feathers, plucking them free one by one in his anxiety.

Jon having a habit of something similar, trying furiously to groom his wings into something approaching ‘decent condition’, to the point that his feathers break and fall out. His illness and poor nutrition leave them brittle, poorly-suited for flight, and an eyesore in his eyes. He has no one to help preen them, tidy them and reassure him that they are still lovely and useful- he combs through them in violent fashion, frown deepening as more feathers fall to the ground. He hates them. He hates them like he hates the rest of his body.

Jon, as peregrines do, diving at such incredible speeds- perhaps to target an enemy, or perhaps to avoid one- only to miss his mark and hit the ground. Hard.

Britva having Tim’s wings ripped from his back to pin up on his office wall.

Jon, during the worst bouts of his illness, struggling to keep his wings from dragging on the ground behind him as he stands in front of staff, crowds, other businessmen, unable to let his guard down, even as his shoulders shake with the strain of keeping them upright when he feels so sick. Post-TEC, him constantly digging his talons into them out of stress and anger, pulling out fistfuls of feathers at his worst, with nowhere to redirect it. Who cares? They were ugly anyways.

Tim, Angeline and Butler, all awakened by nightmares, tiredly preening each other’s wings late at night until they are calmed enough to try to sleep again.

Tim, Butler (and maybe even Jon) all left stranded after some disaster or another- with no way home at the moment and no safehouse nearby, they find themselves huddling under Butler’s wings to keep warm and out of the weather, Tim wishing he could shield his bodyguard too.

One of the three captured by an enemy and tied up, haphazardly wrapped in their own wings as if they were sheets, to keep them from getting loose. The ropes/chains cut into their feathers, all twisted up horribly, and there’s a chance they wouldn’t be able to fly even if they could somehow get free.

One of them, winged, coming across some other magical creature not quite so friendly. A siren dragging them under, their wings weighing them down as they try to fight their way back to the surface, or a gorgon snatching them up, smirking at the way they flutter desperately as they struggle to break loose.

In a winged twist on the Post-TEC AU, Tim quietly preening them for Jon one night, because in his spiraling state he finds that he has neglected them so badly that the feathers are matting, so dulled one can hardly see the stripes barring them anymore. Others at the gathering had laughed, wickedly (led by one Phonetix CEO) at their state, and Tim was worried to find that Jon hadn’t even attempted to defend himself.

[er-cryptid]

Factitious Disorder

-- a disorder where someone deceives others by appearing sick, by purposely getting sick, or by self-injury

-- can also happen when family members or caregivers falsely present others as being ill, injured, or impaired

-- symptoms can range from mild (slight exaggeration of symptoms) to severe

-- patient may make-up symptoms or tamper with medical tests

-- not the same as inventing medical problems for a practical benefit

-- challenging to identify

-- hard to treat

[dyke-in-crisis]

tattooneedle anyone?? commissions patreon

[dunmeshistash]

What chapter/ chapters tell Mithrun’s backstory? or if it’s not too many could you post those pages? I read the whole manga but for some reason I have no memory of reading about Mithrun’s backstory and I’ve been confused about how he got to be the way he is. I read the wiki but I want to go back and read the actual part of the manga that will explain this to me. Thank you!

The version Kabru tells is from chapter 62, might be a little confusing cause it's told between other things happening as they await for the canaries to save them. Its not really short enough for me to post the whole thing here plus its a great chapter I recommend rereading. (It's also the kabumisu canon foot fetish chapter)

As the chapter cover implies this chapter is a VERY condensed and cleaned up version Kabru made for us (for Laios actually)

So it's a "unreliable narrator" version of his backstory and things like the woman he wanted might have been overstated in Kabrus version cause as he says her

It's just a good point to make people invested.

That being said we also get some more things about his backstory from extras! (I recommend reading chapter 62 before the extras tho)

First there's Mithrun's own adventurer's bible extra

With this right away we see the story Kabru was telling left out several things that were important, like how Mithrun WASN'T the perfect youth. And how his jealousy for his brother was greater than just wanting to have his girl.

Another one is Milsiril's Extra

Here we have a better perspective of how he was perceived. And how she helped him get back on his feet and join the canaries again after utaya, Kabru's version skips completely over the fact he needed 20 years of rehab to be able to come back lmao. Now for daydream hour extras we have this one that shows just HOW MESSY his recovery actually was.

And that the brother he dismissed was the one to help him. And Milsiril helping with his rehabilitation once she had retired from the canaries.

Here's Mithruns timeline if you want to check when and how far apart things happened!

I don't think I missed anything.. hope this helps!

[void-dude]

any other Stan twin-centric fic recs? :0

Oh boy I sure do!!! TW: Suicide, Self harm, injury (Please read the tags before you read)

Adrift (My fav of this bunch I think)

Stanford wakes up on the deck of the Stan O'War, concussed and alone.

The Whole Truth

After a few months at sea, a painful reminder of his past prompts Stan to hide an injury. Confused about his sudden change in behavior, Stanford assumes the worst. OR Stanford's health anxiety meets Stanleys fear of abandonment

Run Away Like the Tide (Stupid, Stupid Hope)

They do it together. Stan and Ford and the water around them throughout their lives.

His Future 

Stan came to this bridge to rid the world of a piece of trash. He had no future, no life, no friends or family. The world had no place for him. He was trash. Ford just happens to be driving by when he sees his brother sitting on the edge of a bridge.

The Legend of the sea bros

The boys are off on an adventure at sea And talk about they issues and they need each other emotionally and physically to survive. Ford is trying to reject the help from his brother that he desperately needs.Stan is so worried about his brother that he forgets that sometimes he needs to rely on his brother for support.

Toffee Peanuts & Pitt Cola

The Sea Grunkles finally get the Stan o war ll out on the open ocean, but being in a confined space with someone you haven’t talked to in 30 years is bound to reveal some secrets. Or Stan might as well hurt himself before somebody else hurts him.

Volition

Ford wakes up on the Stan o' War II with images of blank space roaring in his mind. While a conversation with his brother might not fix everything, it can certainly help.

Dear Dipper and Mabel 

There's trouble in Piedmont. Dipper and Mabel's parents have been fighting, and although they should be used to it by now, getting thrown back into the fire after a summer in Gravity Falls hasn't been easy. On a particularly bad morning, Stan and Ford send the twins a letter full of stories, reminding them that family is out there, somewhere in the woods.

I've got you, brother

"He hit you?”

"It's nothing I haven't handled before."

Or, in which Filbrick Pines is a terrible man, and Ford learns something about Stan.

The Insignificance Of Milestones

Stan wakes up with his head in the clouds. It’s a good day. But why are the kids treating him so well?

where you don't see me

Stanley Pines never wanted to hurt his twin brother. He'd never asked for any of this. All he'd ever wanted was to sail the world with Ford by his side.

Anger is Our Undoing

When Stan and Ford try to study some anomalous fish they end up facing off against something much bigger. A Hurt/Comfort Sea Grunkles Adventure

[jelly-fish-wishes]

TW: Implied Self Harm / Suicidal Ideation

ACT 1 - 1

ACT 2 - 1 <<< 21 / 22 / 23

...

[hasello]

TW: BLOOD, INJURIES, SELF-HARM

first/previous/next

…that?

The self-harm is more accidental I’d say, but it’s still what it is. By this I mean that: Lee wouldn’t hurt himself on purpose, although he also doesn’t mind when the world does it for him. His only sin is that he doesn’t stop it.

Also I’m sorry if it seems unnecessarily bloody but at this point I’m just using this comic as a punching bag - to get rid of some tension. My head is a mess lately.

[marskiiii]

tw blood

we love some dazai angst :)

[shkika]

These two slug cats have a lot of parallels to me so I really enjoy them. I love how they are the two starting downpour slug cats yet they are complete opposites.

You have Gourmand enjoying life, crafting and making use of the wonderful little things in life. Going back home and sharing those wonders with others. And (in my headcanons at least) Gourmand starts a family even. (The two little slug pups at the end of the campaign).

Artificer's campaign starts with losing family and subsequently losing yourself. Dedicating yourself to spreading the hurt and pain that was dealt to you. Finding your way into the deepest of parts of where the enemy resides until it's not even about the pups anymore.

[antikr1sta]

(tw sh/blood/vent art, the text is just kinda angsty?) ...this isn't a place, where anyone should go. breathing hindered by pillowcases filled with mold. even the bugs on the walls are filled with ill will , as they burrow through skin, with no intent to kill. slowly...as though a freezing wind through rickety old windowpanes, it seeps, although a winter coat can't even warm up this frostbitten soul. so one remains shellshocked, unable to move, still, drowning in icy water. what comes to mind? a thought and a statement: being is a bother "i hate it here, i hate the smell and fluorescent lights, but most of all I hate you", he utters, gazing at his own face in the reflection of a dirty mirror; as both are only hanging on by a thread.

blood/injury tw ↓

..yeah.. i really really hate it here

[im-just-a-simple-tailor]

Here are some photos of the Amok Time Spirk cosplay I made for me and my friend for a convention!

obligatory spirk pic (we took a lot of very cute photos I have a whole folder in my phone)

It was quite a process honestly. We bought shirts from a thrift store and I altered them to be tight fitting. Then we added the black collar, which was very much eyeballing it but I think it turned out pretty good. We had to put some stealth safety pins in it to wear it though, so that the collar would fit snug to the neck (we couldn’t make them smaller because yk your head has to fit through). The rank stripes are giftwrap and glue lol but honestly they look really accurate (makes me wonder if they didn’t just do the same thing back in the 60s tbh). The insignias we also made ourselves. We cut them out on white fabric and sprayed it with gold spray and then I printed and cut out a stencil and did the black lines with marker.

Also, the most stressful moment in my entire sewing experience had to be cutting the slit into the Kirk uniform. All that work and i just have to cut into it. You better believe I measured and tried it over twenty times before cutting. Also I took a lot of photos before so I’d have something if I ruined it lol

Btw I stuck two pieces of bandaid on the inside at the ends of the slit to prevent it from ripping further.

[applesauce42069]

My mom told me to watch Hersh's funeral. She told me I would cry.

I have been resisting it. I don't know if I have the ability. Sometimes it feels like a struggle to get from one day to the next. I don't know if I have the capacity to feel the emotions I have been feeling for the past almost year so crushingly, all at once.

My mom told me that I needed to hear the way Hersh's parents spoke about him. She told me that the things they said reminded her of me. I know she feels the same way as every other Israeli mother, who sees a picture of a hostage and knows that in some universe that is their child, no matter how far away. I was born and live across the world from where she as born in Haifa but like her and many other Israeli expats and diaspora Jews for that matter, our heart is in our homeland.

Maybe I need to watch Hersh's funeral. Maybe I need to feel these things, so crushingly, all at once. Maybe that will enable me to go on. Maybe that will give me my moment to pay my respects to him, and to all the others who have been killed and taken.

I got to campus today and saw a poster of Eden Yerushlami. I knew it was new because these posters don't last long on my campus. There are poster rippers on both sides, don't get me wrong, but there are much much more of them. The poster was put up so high on the pole that it must have been put up with a ladder. The person who put it there wanted to protect her in a way that we weren't able to in a reality. The poster says "kidnapped' but she has been murdered and I want to honestly smash my head against a wall in frustration, anger and despair but I just keep walking.

[dunmeshistash]

Why did Milsiril help with Mithrun's recovery?

Since people seemed to be interested in the post I made about why she adopted Kabru I wanted to write my thoughts about her helping Mithrun too.

I think with Mithrun it gets a little trickier tho, both because Mithrun himself doesn't speak much about his past and because most of it we get from a third party account. I'll also try to discuss based on what I see people say about their relationship although is probably gonna be shorter than Kabru's (came back to say it's not shorter), tw for self-harm because of Mithrun recovery drawings.

1 - So Mithrun could become a canary again

This is the theory I see the most often, probably it's whats on the main story, as far as I'm remembering there's no other mentions of Milsiril related to Mithrun besides the role she plays in sparing his life.

That story isn't reliable tho, Mithrun constantly points out that Kabru is glossing over details and Kabru himself is depicted as cooking (as the kids say) a good story that resonates with an audience.

So we can't really trust that this framing is objectively true

But even so taking just what happened, without the context Kabru added, what she did was spare his life once she realized he still had a hint of desire to exist within him.

Kabru lies (or rather embelishes a lot) when he says "and from that point onward, Mithrun lived only to slay demons. He ate even he had no desire to eat. He lived on even though he had no desire to live." he was useless for 20 years after this so 'saving him cause he will be useful later' isn't really too accurate. Milsiril also wasn't involved with his rehab until Utaya 18~19 years later so it definitely wasn't for this that she helped.

2 - So Mithrun could avenge Utaya by defeating the demon (She winded him up and set him on a path, you know, like a doll)

I think this one is kinda mean, I've seen people speak as if she only helped him after Utaya because she wanted to use him to defeat the demon. But there's no evidence Milsiril even cares about the demon or that she wants vengeance. My girl literally ran away and decided to look away instead of continuing to fight (and I can't blame her)

This, as far as I understand, is based both on the above section and on this part from her adventurer's bible extra

She shows up to visit him and brings up the demon, and then sets him up to go after it, but once again I think it relies on an unkind interpretation of her character; you gotta assume she has unseen ulterior motives already before the comic even starts, since this whole comic is talking about how she completely misinterpreted who Mithrun was when they were in the same squad, and how she feels he's actually someone she would get along with. If you know Milsiril, you know she only gets along with other misfits, she's acknowledging Mithrun as someone who was broken like her even before his desires were eaten.

This is the complete comic

"I always hated you. You were beautiful and perfect, and everybody loved you. You didn't seem to have a single worry or flaw.

But when I saw the dungeon you'd built, I was startled. It was such a warped, convoluted place built from inferiority, jealousy, lies and anger.

I wish I'd tried really talking to you. We might have hit off pretty well. Too late now, I guess"

She acknowledges him as a human being, when before she only saw him as the embodiment of the people that bullied her. And right after that she talks about the demon. There's no indication for a wish of vengeance anywhere in this comic, I'd even say the demon and the dungeons are barely important to what Milsiril is thinking, there's only belated compassion.

3 - Cause he was a new "project"

Related to the reasons pointed out in my Kabru post, people assume Milsiril is the type of person that wants/needs to feel superior to someone, or to put on an altruistic front or what have you. And that interpretation also leaks into how they see her helping Mithrun. I said the main reasons why I don't think she's that type of person on the other post so I wont repeat. But I don't think Mithrun is a "project" at all.

This was right after she fought on Utaya, I imagine a little after or a little before she took in Kabru, so she "had a project" already if you're gonna go with that wording. She was also finally free from the canaries and she had no obligation towards Mithrun. She also only went back to him decades after she spared his life, my assumption is that she did it because she finally could. She couldn't have guessed when she spared his life that 19 years later she would be free from the canaries and that Mithrun still wouldn't have been recovered and would have been needing her.

4 - And finally, why did she spare his life? Why did she help him recover?

This one isn't as straight foward as Kabru's adoption to me. I imagine the fact he had the potential to still be useful could be one of the reasons she spared Mithrun at first, but I also think that he newfound empathy she developed for him when she saw his dungeon might have been part of it, that seeing he still had some sort of drive and desire made her have hope he could still live.

Milsiril really seems like the type of person that likes to nurture, while I wouldn't say this makes her a "softie" and not able to execute him (I'm sure she could do a mercy kill) I think that soft side made her want to give him a chance. There's no proof for any of that ofc, and Kui confirmed in a QnA Mithrun wasn't arrested or executed because they were desperate for people to be in the canaries. (The choice probably wasn't only on her)

Now why she helped him? I think it's because she saw he could be helped.

She says herself she's only visiting, probably to check on him

"They said you've fully recovered but you might as well be a corpse." so by this point I think his body has recovered and he has managed to stabilize? But as this extra from the daydream hour shows he needed 24/7 care to stay alive in those first 18 years

Like she said he might as well be a corpse, he'd be in bed all day and have servants keeping him from dying, he would have fits where he would harm himself, he had no way to go on. It even says that even things that could remind him of his time as dungeon lord weren't allowed so he was probably being kept away from demon mentions (after all I doubt servants even knew about a demon)

But then when she mentions the demon he immediately gets up

She's surprised so I don't think she expected that, and she goes and uses that reaction to help him "Then first eat this. If you finish it all I'll take you to a dungeon again"

Rather than using him to fight the demon I think she's using the demon to help him live. Here's what his bio says

"After Mithrun was recused from the dungeon, he spent a while on the verge of death. However, with time and rehabilitation he gradually became able to lead a normal life again. The Utaya incident was the event that roused him. He thought, 'If I'd been there, I know I could have dealt with the demon somehow' and he resolved to return to active duty. (...)"

So it worked, Milsiril might have been there to help with his rehab but it was the Utaya situation that finally was able to motivate him to find a way to live and rejoin the canaries, so I think rather than setting him up to kill she realized it could be used to help him.

Which isn't a perfect solution, as you might know by the ending, his fate was to die either way: either he would die trying to kill the demon or he would defeat it and die because he had nothing else to live for.

But it was what Milsiril could do for him at that moment and it was how she managed to help him go forwards.

And that's my thoughts about Milsiril and Mithrun, I don't think they as big in each other's lives in canon as some people assume, there's barely a mention of Milsiril on his profile and she's barely named in his backstory. But they were both people that left a mark on each other's existence if only for a short time.

But I don't think Milsiril was just doing charity when helping Mithrun either, I imagine she did it because she saw herself in past Mithrun, and wanted to help him because of it.

Also side note, this extra:

That's past Mithrun saying she has ulterior motives, he isn't reliable and thinks badly of everyone. So ofc he thinks gloomy Milsiril is suspicious for helping, him doesn't mean it's true

Disclaimer again I'm a Milsiril stan so I'm very charitable in my interpretations of her, but hopefully you can see there's no indication she is someone who would use a sick person for revenge with the sources I've attached.

[stripetkattelalala54-gf]

Welcome to the madness!

I couldn't resist drawing King Booario too. My design was very much inspired by @akiiame-blog design and @pianokantzart design. Check them out if you haven't yet, they are both amazing.

[animetrashmuffin]

Seasons greasons! I participated in the @akatsuki-gift-exchange this year and had the pleasure of doing something based on the excellent prompts from @likorys-shimenawa. I hope you like it, I had a ton of fun doing it!