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KOCHANIIII PRZYWITAJMY 4 Z PRZODU!
JEZUUU JESTEM MEGA DUMNA Z SIEBIE💞💞💞💞
#chce byc idealna#nie chce być gruba#chce byc szczupla#chce byc perfekcyjna#chce byc piekna#recovery posting#tw recovery#recovery blog#recovery#będę idealna#bede idealna#nie bede gruba#bede szczupla#będę walczyć#nie poddam się#kocham ane#chce zeby ktos mnie pokochal#będę piękna#chce być piękna#chude jest piękne#chcę schudnąć#chudosc#chudego dnia#chudej nocy motylki#chude ciało#chude nogi#chude uda#chce schudnac#jestem gruba#bede jesc
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Will u ever draw what cured Gordon/benrey look like?? And man… thinking abt that.. how will they cope…. Ohh.. the angst…
did you want that angst served hot or cold?
#tw infection#well post infection#uhhhh#does this land as body horror or#tw recovery#recovery#ask reply#hlvrai infection au#hlvrai gordos feetman#hlvrai benrey
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Roses and Sparkling Water [Hotch x Reader]
Photo credits: Left (@hotchs-big-hands) Center (@brainstormingg) Right (@edwardian-girl-next-door)
Prompt: Aaron surprises the reader by stopping by her apartment after work to celebrate her first month of sobriety.
Pairing: [established relationship] Aaron x fem!non-BAU!reader. The reader uses she/her pronouns
Category: fluff/comfort
Word Count: 4.3K
Content Warnings: Discussion of alcoholism/recovery [binge drinking, being drunk, hiding bottles, sobriety], food is mentioned, Aaron and the reader take a shower together, implied intimacy/sex. If I missed any, please let me know.
A/N: Hi loves! Here is another fic based on the amazing @imagining-in-the-margins January/February Writing Challenge. The prompt this was based on was “Character celebrates a milestone of sobriety.” I wrote this because I am one month sober today! Much of what happens in this story is what I felt before and after deciding to stop drinking. I have my friends and followers (and Aaron) to thank for supporting me and helping me get so far. Y’all are amazing and I love you. If you find yourself relating to any of these things, please know I am proud of you. It is never too early or too late to reach out for help. If you enjoy this fic, likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated! I hope you’re having a great start to your week and thanks for reading. Love Levi - ❤️
List with all stories
y/n = your name
_y/c/e_’s = your color eyes
_y/h/c_ = your hair color
y/n had gotten home from work a half hour ago. It normally took that long for her to relax and be de-stressed enough to do anything enjoyable or productive. y/n didn’t want to be this stressed all the time, but things had piled on with life recently, and she was trying to accept it as best as she could. y/n was just lighting a candle and making a final cup of coffee when there was a knock at her door. y/n looked at the door confused. She hadn’t ordered anything on Amazon, and as likely as she was to get food delivered on yet another stressful day, y/n hadn’t gotten food either. y/n approached the door not sure what to expect. y/n looked out of the peep hole and her face broke out into a smile. This was the best kind of surprise that y/n could hope for. Without thinking about why Aaron was here, particularly with a dozen roses in hand, y/n threw the door open and said, “Hey, you. What are you doing here?”
Hotch stepped inside and moved forward, enveloping y/n in a tight hug. y/n breathed in his classic scent of cologne and shampoo. He had such a rich and deep scent. It was something akin to the smell of rain before a thunderstorm. The scent of green and dirt. It was something that y/n loved about him. Of course, y/n loved everything about Aaron. His smell was just a bonus. He still hadn’t answered her question, so y/n asked again, “So… why are you here? Did you come straight from the office?” y/n studied Hotch as if she was a profiler. He was still wearing his black slacks and white button-up. It looked crisp and well-pressed. y/n remembered a comment he had made on Saturday about picking up his laundry with Jack before he swung by to pick y/n up for an evening at his apartment. Apart from these articles of clothing, Hotch was missing his tie and suit jacket. It was an odd but becoming look on him, and y/n flushed at just how attractive he was in any state of dress.
Aaron smiled at y/n and leaned in to place a kiss on her lips. It was soft and he relished the slight stickiness of y/n’s chapstick which she must have just put on. When Hotch pulled back he said, “I’m here to celebrate you, darling.” He watched as she got slightly flustered and looked at him. y/n was now concerned that she’d forgotten some milestone of their relationship. They’d been together officially for nine months, and they weren’t the type to celebrate each month being together. y/n smiled and loved being celebrated and getting flowers from Aaron, but the why was still a mystery. y/n smiled and said, “Well you’ve got me stymied. Why are we celebrating me? Is it my un-birthday or something?” Hotch pulled back and replied, “Well maybe it’s that, but I was thinking more along the lines of the fact that today is one month of you not drinking.” y/n’s _y/c/e_’s shot open a little more. She hadn’t expected Aaron to remember the date when she’d given up drinking as she hadn’t brought it up much. But y/n loved that Aaron paid such close attention to her and the things that were important to her. y/n shouldn’t have been surprised but was and smiled even more and said, “Honey, that’s so sweet of you. How did you remember?”
Aaron took one of y/n’s hands gave it a squeeze and replied, “Sweetheart, when you decided you’d had enough I was incredibly proud of you. I know you only told a few people with me being one of them, and I know you don’t bring it up often, but I think it’s so important for you to feel accomplished in making it this far.” y/n let out a little laugh and said, “Aaron, it’s only thirty-one days. It’s not like a year or something. Every Saturday I still think about getting a drink at the bar. You must see it in my face sometimes. Or like before we go to bed.” Aaron nodded and gently took y/n’s chin in his hands so that y/n was sure to be looking at him. He was serious but not angry as he said, “I do notice, y/n. I notice every time I’m with you, and every time I see you choose to not go for a drink I’m so proud of you for that. I know it’s not easy. I want to highlight and celebrate all those times you’ve said no and let you know how strong I think you are.” y/n’s eyes began to water with emotions. She leaned into Aaron’s chest again. Hotch had placed the roses on the kitchen counter by this point with his long arms so he could more comfortably wrap his arms around his partner. y/n swallowed back the lump in her throat and said, “What have I ever done to deserve you, Aaron?” Hotch chuckled and said, “You never had to do anything to deserve me. We found each other and that’s all that matters to me. We give and take equally, if we didn’t this wouldn’t work.” Hotch pulled back again and asked, “So, would you like to do something to celebrate? I’m down for anything. I told the team and Strauss that I wouldn’t be available tonight. We could stay here or go out. I’m down for what you like.”
y/n beamed at the idea of a night assured that Aaron wouldn’t be snatched away by work. y/n said, “Well, such an offer is too tempting to answer without thinking about it for a minute.” Aaron smiled and replied, “Well while you think about it how about I’ll get a vase for those flowers.” y/n looked at the flowers, almost forgetting that they were there with Aaron in front of her. She chuckled and said, “Okay. There’s something in that top cabinet that I can’t reach that would work to hold them. Thank you for bringing them. They’re so beautiful.” Hotch nodded and said, “Well, nothing’s more beautiful than you, but I’m glad you like them.” As the tall man approached the kitchen to look for a vase, y/n pulled the flowers in front of her face and inhaled the light floral scent. It reminded them so much of Spring and just how thoughtful Aaron was as a partner. He’d seen it all from day one. Her problems with drinking. The anxiety and stress of the recent move and new job.
In fact, being with Aaron had been one of the main reasons y/n had quit. She had gotten sick of having to hide empty bottles when Hotch said he could stop by with or without Jack. It took work to throw away or hide five empty wine bottles or lug them out to the recycling. The hiding of the extant of her problem was also embarrassing. Every time she went to the recycling bin across the street, she thought that everyone she passed was looking and listening to the bottles clink on each other. On top of that, Aaron would always offer to drive her to work and she’d get into his car with either a headache or a hangover that she was badly hiding. The scent of Listerien must have been so strong in the small confines of the car. The problem that y/n had with drinking was that it never got so bad that she got in trouble. Not at work or with her friends. y/n was incredibly lucky that her binge drinking late into the night had only resulted in her showing up an hour late to work one day that wasn’t very important. She’d not even gotten a reprimand for it.
The real impetus for change had happened in two waves. The first had been on a day that had been so bad and overwhelming that y/n had called Aaron in near hysterics. Once he had heard her in distress so bad that she couldn’t even talk, he’d dropped everything and come over. He found y/n in her bed in what looked like such emotional pain that it nearly broke his heart. Aaron sat next to her, rubbed her back, and whispered words of comfort while y/n tried to stop the tears seeping from her eyes. y/n sniffled and asked, “Can you get me some water from the fridge? Please.” Hotch nodded and got up. y/n had completely forgotten that she hadn’t taken care of the bottles of wine both empty and full, nor the plastic cup that she’d put back into the fridge the night before at 3:00 a.m. when she couldn’t force down one more sip. y/n was too upset to think about it right now. But when Aaron opened the fridge, he instantly noticed the bottles and cup on the side of the door. Hotch knelt down and made sure he was seeing what he thought he was seeing right. He silently lifted the bottles to see which were full and which were empty. He knew that y/n had a drinking problem even though she never drank in front of him. It was easy to see even if y/n tried to hide it. But this was worse than he had ever imagined. It hurt Hotch to see y/n trying to drown out her pain like this. With the way she was right now, he could understand the desire to self-medicate, but he cared about her too much to see her hurting herself like this to not say something. But he’d save that conversation for later. He quickly got the water she had asked for and moved back to give it to her and cuddle her until she could explain why she was so sad.
That Saturday, as Hotch and y/n went on their normal trip to the park for him to run and y/n to walk before picking up Jack from Haley’s, he brought up what he’d seen in her fridge earlier that week. y/n was confused at the beginning when Aaron didn’t start his normal stretching and jog, instead opting to walk with her. y/n looked at him and asked, “Are you feeling alright, love? Is your hip hurting you again?” Aaron gave his head a small shake as he said, “No, I’m good. I just wanted to talk to you about something.” y/n tipped her head to the side slightly. His tone was serious as was his expression. Suddenly y/n felt like she was under a microscope, and she was panicking. y/n wondered what she’d done and her brain came up with the worst thing imaginable like Aaron breaking up with her. So when he said softly, “I saw the bottles in your fridge, y/n, and I’m really worried about you.” It took y/n’s brain a few seconds of buffering to let Aaron’s words register. When they did, y/n instantly felt shame well up inside her. She’d forgotten about the fact that he’d looked at the fridge. y/n’s brain fired all its neurons for some kind of response but it was useless, and she said in a defeated tone, “I know I’ve got a problem. It’s bad and I feel bad about it. I’ve tried stopping so many times and it just never works. I can’t do the moderation thing. I’m sorry you saw that, I’m sorry I hid it, I’m just sorry…” y/n didn’t have anything more to say in their defense. y/n realized that what they had said wasn’t even a defense. It was just useless words that didn’t mean anything. At least y/n didn’t think they meant anything to anyone. But as Aaron walked alongside his partner, he felt a profound sadness yet strength at y/n speaking at all. He moved in front of y/n and stopped them in their tracks. y/n ended up running into him as her eyes were glued to the ground. y/n looked up at Aaron expecting him to be angry or upset, but he just looked concerned. y/n swallowed and said, “Why are you looking at me like that?” His facial expression wasn’t the one she had expected and it threw her off completely. She had almost hoped for anger. y/n was used to anger in response to her shortcomings. Empathy was so new to her that it felt wrong somehow.
Aaron pulled both of them off the trail gently and to a nearby bench. When they were settled, and y/n was looking at him with concern, he responded, “y/n. I’ve only ever cared or been worried about you. Your drinking, which I’ve known about for a while now, never made me angry. It just made me sad that you were hurting so much and not telling me, or anyone. When I saw your fridge and just how much you were drinking it made me concerned for you. You were so upset and I just want you to be okay. I know it’s hard. It’s gotta be so hard, but would you let me help you? Can you tell me why it started? How it got like this?” y/n was a sniffling mess by now and nodded without saying anything. After she’d taken a deep breath and realized that Aaron didn’t hold the shame for her that she held for herself, y/n said, “Yes. I’ll tell you, Aaron. But can we not do this in the park? Maybe we could go to your house where there isn’t a bottle for me to be tempted by?” Hotch had to let out a soft chuckle at y/n’s statement and gave her shoulder a slight squeeze and the top of their head a kiss as he said, “Of course, love. Let’s go to my place where we can both relax and talk more privately.” A few minutes later the couple was settled on Aaron’s comfy couch and y/n started sharing. She thought that it would be hard to let out those feelings and the draw of the numbing effect that wine had on her. Although it was uncomfortable at the start, Aaron’s compassion and caring questions that dug at and begged to understand y/n on a deeper level allowed her to let him into the part of her life that she had kept hidden away for over three years. As y/n spoke, it was so clear to her that he’d loved her through all of her flaws and bad choices she’d made. Not only did he love her, but he tried to understand and be there for her pain.
y/n was thrown from that memory when Hotch returned with a tall vase that would accommodate the flowers, and y/n felt like a giddy schoolgirl at just seeing him. Aaron couldn’t help but smile too as he said, “I’m never going to get tired of seeing that look on your face, y/n. I’ll have to stop by your place more often after you get home from work unannounced.” Aaron took the flowers from y/n and nestled them in the glass vase. y/n stood behind him while he did this, wrapped her arms around his waist, and leaned into him. As Aaron arranged the flowers to their optimum fullness, y/n looked out the window and remembered just how pretty a day it was outside. It wasn’t too hot or cold, so y/n said, “I think I know what I want to do with our free evening.” Aaron looked over his shoulder and said, “Oh, yeah. What’s that y/n?” y/n replied, “Well I’d like to go to the park near your place, and then if you’re down we could go to that Italian place where we went to on our first real date?” Aaron turned around and relaxed into her embrace and said, “Darling anything you want to do tonight we can. Well, anything but go and have like five tequila shots.” y/n nearly choked laughing and said teasingly, “Oh my gosh, Aaron, you’re the worst. Plus you know I hate tequila shots.” Hotch smiled and leaned down to kiss y/n on the forehead. He loved how lowkey y/n was. He knew she’d understand the joke, if she wouldn’t have, he never would have said it. He pulled back and said, “Well maybe we can have some sparkling water instead. Now. Do you still have that blanket from when we had that picnic with Jack?” y/n nodded and said, “It’s in the hall closet. I washed it a long time ago. It might have moth balls by now, to be honest.” Aaron stepped toward the closet and said, “Well, we can shake them out when we get to the park if they’re there. Do you want to grab a coffee to go? I see you’re machine is still running.” y/n whipped their head toward the kitchen and said, “Shoot, I forgot about that. Thanks for the reminder. Do you want a cup too?” Aaron called out over his shoulder, “Yes, that’d be great.” As Hotch got the blanket, y/n pulled two cups from the cabinet and made the coffee. She then quickly grabbed her purse and sunglasses. y/n held the door open for Aaron and they both walked down to his car.
In the park, the pair found a spot under a shady tree that was private but gave a view to a field where people were tossing a frisbee around and some dogs were chasing tennis balls in the lush grass. Aaron and y/n were quiet for a while as they both took in the lovely weather and coffee. When Aaron finished his cup, he set it on the quilted blanket and lay down to look at the sky. Seeing the expanse of Aaron’s chest so wide open, y/n set down her cup and made sure it stayed up before placing her head and upper body on his chest. Hotch snuggled y/n’s head into his chest a bit more and his hands found their place on her back and in her _y/h/c_ hair. y/n sighed contentedly into him, not in a tired way just a “I’m happy to be here way.” Aaron’s eyes gazed down to her back and shoulders and he said, “y/n, would you tell me why you decided to quit? I know you don’t make a big deal about it, but if you’re willing to tell me, I’d like to know.” y/n smiled into his chest and her mind flashed back to the second reason why she’d given up drinking. y/n’s fingers traced patterns over his skin and replied, “Well, it’s kinda silly, but I was just sick of being sick. I remember that Monday when I woke up as foggy as ever and I was thinking about how I only had one bottle left in the fridge and that I was going to have to walk to the store and buy another one to feel comfortable for the night because one bottle was never enough. And then I wondered if I had the money for it because it was the end of the month. And it thought about the type of power that alcohol had over my emotions and finances. It felt like it was controlling my life and I was sick of it. I had such better things to live for, like you and Jack and work. There was so much more to pay attention to in life. So I got out of bed that morning and poured all that I had out. Then I threw away all the bottles, immediately, so I wouldn’t be reminded of them. Let me tell you, I didn’t sleep for two days after that. It was pretty shitty.” y/n chuckled at how terrifying the choice had been for the first two days. Aaron listened and his face broke out in a smile as his hands ran up and down y/n’s back. He said, “Well I’m so happy for you. I see how much you’ve kind of come into yourself over this last month. I know it’s been hard, and yes I said that before, but you’re doing great, and I’ll keep supporting you however you need me to, tomorrow, next week, next month, until the end of time. I promise you that.” y/n looked up from his chest and gave his jaw a series of kisses that left Aaron fully flustered.
When it got dark the pair moved to the restaurant where they were seated at a corner table inside. The place had little tea candles on the tables and Aaron, true to his word, ordered a chilled bottle of sparkling water for the table. He even asked for wine flutes like they were having champagne. y/n laughed slightly as he poured them both glasses and handed one over to her. y/n picked up her glass as did Aaron. y/n’s eyes lit up as they clinked glasses and he said, “Here is to my love and how proud I am of you.” y/n added, “Well here this should also go out to my love and just how amazing you are to me. I wouldn’t be here at a month sober if you didn’t remind me how happy I can be without drinking.” Aaron couldn’t help but flush a little. They both took a sip and as y/n set down her glass she smiled at him and said, “You know Aaron, as simple as you are, you can go all out on some things.” y/n winked at the bottle of sparkling water and Hotch chuckled saying, “Well, I only think I’m extra for the important things, and I think this is one of them.” Soon after that, their food came and they had a nice meal together reflecting on their relationship and how it had evolved over the months.
When the pair got back to y/n’s home, she turned to him and asked, “So, are you going to spend the night tonight? Was that calling out to the team and Director Strauss just a tonight thing, or could it maybe extend into tomorrow morning?” y/n gave him her best pleading eyes because it was so nice to have him around unexpectedly, and she wanted to capitalize on his time if he could get away with it. Aaron smiled and said, “Well, I let the team get away with being in the office late once or twice, I don’t know why I can’t follow suit once in a while.” y/n grinned and said, “That’s my rule breaker. Now…I was thinking maybe I could do with a shower. How would you feel about joining me?” Hotch’s eyes flashed dark with a desire for a moment and he said in a voice suddenly much lower, “Well, that sounds like a good idea to me. Let me get it running at a good temperature.”
While Aaron was getting the shower set perfectly, y/n stripped down to nothing. y/n looked at herself in the mirror, glad to see her bold glow without the feeling of fuzziness from drinking, When Hotch said that the water was ready, she moved into the steamy room. Aaron’s eyes widened as she stepped past him and into the shower. She turned to face him and let the water cascade down her naked body. y/n loved the fact that she could freeze him like this, and she teased, “Are you going to stand out there in the cold love?” Aaron snapped out of his daze and he quickly stripped out of his clothes. y/n looked him up and down as he also got drenched from the shower. Aaron couldn’t stop himself and moved forward and began kissing her neck and shoulders. He stopped and asked, “Is this okay love? Do you feel like it tonight?” y/n smiled and ran a hand down his jaw and chest toward his navel. y/n nodded and said, “Of course I do Aaron. I want you like this whenever we can enjoy each other. Getting to be this close to you makes me feel so alive.” Aaron’s eyes roamed over her face again and he said, “Good, because I want to give it to you tonight and whenever you want it, y/n. Now let me get back to this very very important job.”
He moved back to sucking and nipping at y/n’s warm skin and his mouth moved lower to a more sensitive area. As his tongue started working the spot on her chest and his hands worked over his body as well, y/n leaned her head back and let out a gasp. y/n ran her hands through his short hair. As Aaron kept working fervently and lovingly, she realized how much better was to experience all things with a clear head. Especially when it came to scenarios like this. To feel Aaron taking care of her with such love and desire was the best feeling she could ever have. When they were like this, giving themselves to the other, the idea of a drink, no matter how good, would never even cross y/n’s mind. As y/n let out the first soft moan of Aaron’s name and his hands moved to her thighs, y/n gave into the passion of the night because when it came down to it, Aaron was the best drug of all.
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#aaron x y/n#aaron x reader#ssa aaron hotchner#aaron hotcher#aaron hotch x you#aaron hotch x reader#hotch x reader#hotch x y/n#criminal minds#fanfiction#cm#reader insert#fluff#comfort#hotch fluff#hotch comfort#read the tags#read he warnings#sobriety#recovery#tw alcohol#tw alchoholism#tw recovery#aaron is so sweet#one month sober#criminal minds x you#hotch blurb#hotch drabble#levi writes#female reader
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A week before i wanted to kill my self, i was looking like this, now im a big pig and i don’t know how to control my self again, my life has changed completely and im a prisoner in my own house and family, i have lost all my friends, i used to be on tuitter, and have bunch of followers, i also made a lot of friends, now i lost everything, and the one that hurts most is that i don’t have that body anymore, i was so close to be perfect, but now i have to start again
#tw 3d vent#tw mia#tw thinspi#tw ed sheeran#tw restriction#tw ana rant#tw recovery#forced recovery#tw ed but not sheeran
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♡ High Protein/Low Cal Ideas #8 ♡
*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:
youtube
*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:*✧・゚: *✧・゚:
#pro recovery#recovery#tw recovery#mealsp0#mealspo#mealspø#low cal meal#high protein#tw ed bllog#tw ed descussion#Youtube#low restriction
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My meme™️
#ed meme#ed memes#tw ed things#tw ed relapse#tw ed mention#dank memes#sad meme#sad memes#sad thoughts#ed relapse#ed mention#tw ed thoughts#ed thoughts#sad days#hungry#tw recovery#depression#anxiety#i'm fat
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how many lines did you carve into your skin before you realized it wasn't poetry? These scars, these broken things, are just an aperture of who I used to be but I'd be remiss if I didn't recognize me in the wreckage. I built a home in my suffering and the aftermath of recovery is such a brutal, beautiful place to be. My healing is different than anything I expected it to be but truly, I didn't think I'd ever heal at all. To have these scars is a privilege, an honor. To live long enough to bear them, to survive long enough to wear them How many lines did it take, I wonder, when was the last time, I wonder? but oh, how wonderful it is to forget, to not regret the messes I made because in time, all things fade and though these will last they are a testament to the past that did not fell me. So yes, these lines are not poetry but they might as well be because though they mar my skin they are a testament of every moment I did not end and I hope if your lines are a lot like mine that you find the peace that comes after, that your days are filled with laughter and that your smile is never far behind. I hope your recovery is more gentle than mine has been, but even if it is not, I hope you read this poem again and find solace in the belonging of the plight. Your fight is my fight, your suffering is my own, and though recovery is isolating. you are not alone. You are not alone.
#poetry#spilled ink#tw depression#depression#tw cutting#lit#alt lit#prose#poets of tumblr#poets on tumblr#recovery#tw recovery#we broken things#we#broken#things#poem#poems#poems on tumblr
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There are moments within the withdrawal
When you drag your tired body
To the altar of reckoning,
Only to see something in the dark reflection
Worth saving.
A brief moment of laughter,
Seeping through porcelain cracks
Like warm, golden honey.
A reminder of who you once were,
Somebody gentle and maybe even
Worth calling out to-
Sitting in the ruin of recovery,
Though the moment is fleeting-
Its warmth overwhelmed me..
The way they laughed and shouted,
Insisting on dragging me along.
"You've been so...loving lately."
And I had been.
And I wanted to be.
And to be numb is easier,
But it's nice to feel like me again-
If only for a moment.
x
#poets on tumblr#writing#spilled ink#poem#spilled thoughts#original poem#sad thoughts#mental health#recovery#tw drugs#tw drug reference#tw recovery#personal vent#vent post#vent poetry#vent poem#I'm sorry I'm a mess lately#drugs you know#they're hard#it's been hard#going without meds#wish i never had to take them#i miss you#I'm trying#thank you for being patient#thank you for dealing with me
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Help I need a fucking drink but I'm in recovery. Nothings even happened. Tell me how stupid I am for contemplating this, mate.
Alright, you asked me to, so no one can then say I am being mean, just fulfilling their request which is actually very nice of me.
You are stupid. There. Ethanol is boring anyway compared to other things so why bother, just let it be. Go to sleep or something to ignore it. Yell at someone, start an argument to get distracted from your cravings. Or find something mentally stimulating to distract yourself, some kind of mystery to solve. Try to learn something new, read Wikipedia articles, watch educational videos on Youtube or origami tutorials. Or play some games.
A few years ago while I had been withdrawing from nicotine (not fully voluntarily but anyway, not the first time not the last and not the only substance but who cares) John tried to distract me by playing Cluedo, to prevent me from destroying the entire flat. However, he was not satisfied with how I played the game, although it was the only possible solution, so then I stabbed the game board against the wall. Which was also a good distraction, so play a board game with someone, start an argument about it and then stab something (preferably not something living).
#roleplay#rp#sherlock roleplay#sherlock rp#johnlock roleplay#johnlock rp#bbc sherlock#sherlock#sherlock holmes#john watson#board games#tw addiction#tw recovery#sherlock gives advice#maybe actually some good advice but it could also be bad advice#tw drinking#tw withdrawal#cluedo#smoking#sherlocks smoking habit
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Wiem że miałam tego nie promować ale muszę się z czymś podzielić ten post nie ma na celu zachęcenia do czegoś a bardziej pochwalenia się z siebie? XD nwm ale jestem mega z siebie dumna okej?
To chodzi o to że IMO przejście na recovery to najlepsza decyzja w moim życiu! Nie dość że dużo jem (3/4 no czasami 2 posiłki dziennie zazwyczaj po 300/400kcal)(dla mnie to dużo) a jedzenia to każdy się zgodzi że uwielbia jeść i kocha jedzenie (problem w kaloriach nie w jedzeniu) i wgl jedzenia sprawia mi wielką radość to jeszcze chudnę jakby kocham siebie za tą decyzję i jestem dumna że nie wybrałam decyzji gdzie przechodzę na recovery i tyje tego to bym żałowała i bym wróciła więc no xd ale to tyle przepraszam jak ktoś będzie zły za to że to "promuje" jak już mowilam ten post nie ma na celu tego zrobić
A i jeszcze ogłoszenia parafialne!
Więc jednak nie chce mi się wstawiać codziennie bilansów więc będ�� co parę dni albo wgl z tego zrezygnuje bo po prostu nie mam na to czasu i bardziej będę wstawiała jakieś swoje przemyślenia albo jakieś NISKOKALORYCZNE przepisy dla was🤗😘
Powodzenia w chudnieciu moje kochane motylki lekkiego dnia I chudej nocy🦋🦋
#chce byc idealna#nie chce być gruba#chce byc szczupla#chce byc perfekcyjna#chce byc piekna#recovery posting#tw recovery#recovery blog#recovery#chcę schudnąć#chce schudnac#chude nogi#chudzinka#chudzinki#kocham ane#jestem ulana#za gruba#grube nogi#grube uda#grubaska#jestem gruba#tw ana bløg#motylki any#chudego dnia#chude jest piękne#chudosc#chudej nocy motylki#będę idealna#bede idealna#nie bede gruba
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Sorry for adding to what im sure is your massive pile of asks, but you have such a knack for making insanely interesting aus and amazing art to go with it. It's fr an addiction. For the parasite au, do you think there would be any side and/or after effects that linger if the science team were cured? Or would they just go back exactly to the way they were before? I can't imagine Gordon or even Benrey coming out unscathed even if a cure was whipped up. The angst potential is rotating in my mind.
haha it’s all good! ^^ I love getting into the nitty gritty of my aus so the more the merrier! And tysm! I have sm fun with the aus I make so I’m incredibly happy to hear that ppl are having as much enjoyment tagging along as well as adding their own to what I have formed.
as for those infected then cured, definitely! in the science teams case it would be worsened/loss of vision (Darnold could likely fix it) and in ppl who had prolonged infection unhealthy weight loss due to a lack of nutrition and joint pain. Other than physical injury it’s gonna take time to readjust from it, nothing too long term unless it’s something loss of permanent- (like loosing a limb or the infected person having their optic nerve gone- leading to blindness)
Gordon getting cured would probably have the worst of it recovery wise, next to his already crappy vision getting crappier our orange guy would have lost a lot of that fat he had on his body from not eating much other than the occasional nibble from another human while he was out of it… :( but let’s say that the arm incident also kinda happened so he unfortunately comes back to consciousness finding out he’s also lost a limb :/
Benrey on the other hand would probably just be really sluggish and have a lot of pain in his body from the janky movements he had no control of . And also a gross gooey sweet voice chronic cough bc his body is trying to expel whatever is left in him.
BUT YEAH TON OF ANGST POTENTIAL! ESPECIALLY IF YOU CONSIDER THE HYPOTHETICAL “GOOD END RECOVERY” PART OF THE AU :))
#tw parasite#tw body horror#tw infection#tw recovery#ask reply#hlvrai infection au#yeah no one’s gonna have fun even after a potential cure
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Uhh so I'm dying-
(TW mentions of death and eating disorders!)
yeah this isnt a joke, im actually dying. Not rocky, my character,
Me, Maverick, the creator, im dying.
so uhh these past few days I havent posted anything because of that, im not going to explain too much, but basically ive struggled with anorexia for... six years now? i want to get better,
but yeah, i havent gotten better... these past few weeks especially have been hard on me, my hairs falling out and ive woken up sick everyday, fevers are to much to handle, i get headaches, I'm never hungry anymore...
so yeah! if i just, dissappear for good? That's why! Uh, kiyo and lunar can have DoneTake if that happens.
But I hope it doesn't, I'll try posting more, try eating more, all that good stuff
Love y'all
#tw eating issues#tw mental illness#tw death#tw depressing stuff#Tw dying#tw ana rant#ed mention#tw disordered eating#tw starving#vent#Tw vent#tw recovery#Tw#ana trigger#disordered eating thoughts#Tell me if I need to add tags!!
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♡ High Protein/Low Cal Ideas #4 ♡
youtube
#pro recovery#recovery#tw recovery#mealsp0#mealspo#mealspø#low cal meal#high protein#tw ed bllog#tw ed descussion#Youtube#low restriction
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I feel a bit antsy
I need to do something
I need to feel something
I pace my room
l e f t r i g h t
l e f t r i g h t
l e f t r i g h t
l e f t r i g h t
stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop.
I need my fix. It’s down stairs in the garage. That’s where they “hide” them.
but I have another in the corner of my closet. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop. stop.
but I won’t do it. Only for you. so I go back to pacing-
l e f t r i g h t
l e f t r i g h t
l e f t r i g h t
l e f t r i g h t
#Tw#trigger warning#trigger words#tw sh#tw sh in tags#tw sh scars#tw sh implied#tw sh recovery#tw sh related#tw sh destructive behaviour#tw sh vent#tw cutting#tw suicide#tw self destruction#tw s3lf harm#tw sh thoughts#I’m better than this#tw recovery#tw vent#only for you#poetry#poemsbyme#poem#poets corner#poets cafe#poets on tumblr#poetsclub#my art#poems on tumblr#life
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TW: food, eating, ED and recovery
so today my coworker (an older lady) was offering me biscuits (cookies) and I kept saying no thank you I’m okay. She then thought it was appropriate to say LOUDLY do you have one of those eating problems? Later that day she came over to me and said oh I’m just worried about you, you look very thin at the moment??? Like go away
I’m just mad because I work hard to keep myself healthy, I’ve been on both ends of the scale (considered obese and underweight). I have to stick to my routine so I don’t end up at either of those places again plus I just don’t like snacking at work. I don’t want everyone to be gossiping about my weight that’s a massive trigger for me 😔
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To my girls that starve and puke: being skinny it’s hot. Being dead it’s not
So don’t live to eat. Eat to live. Stay safe
Xoxo
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