#tv in every room
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hey autistic people who get overwhelmed by large groups or noise or conversation or etc etc etc you’re not evil for wanting to leave a family gathering. just so you know.
#additionally hard when you have no diagnosis#people just think im “antisocial” and “rude”#while im over here completely burnt out#because the whole room is talking and the tv is loud and all the lights are on and every kid in the house is shrieking about something#and whoever you came with(looking at you parents) acts like you’re evil and hate your family when you even ask when you’re leaving#autism#actually autistic#autistic#autism spectrum disorder#autistic things#asd#autistic community#undiagnosed autistic#undiagnosed neurodivergent#undiagnosed autism#neurodiversity#neurodivergent#neurodiverse stuff#neurospicy#neurodivergence#neurodivergencies
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Kingdom Hearts 3 - Toy Box
#kingdom hearts 3#kh3#toy box#scenery#my gif#running around andy's room and seeing sora donald and goofy's toy themed appearance for the first time is such a vivid memory for me#they went so hard making that toy store it's soooo detailed. just imagine all of the assets needed to fill the place#box art for toys; video game cover cases; various figures/toys to put out on display for a variety of different toy departments#they could have remade al's toy barn but no they created this huge three story tall mega super store#it's every kids dream and looks too grand and amazing to be an actual existing building in the toy story canon lol#but even the plot elements of this world are so intriguing#there's the introduction of yozora; the gigas mechs; having sora thrown into a tv screen right into the verum rex game; split worlds#so much happens here and i just know it'll be fully recontextualized in future game installments#i'm really looking forward to that#but all of that aside it's really neat to be toy sized#it's all just such a fun experience. good world
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If you are having a breakdown in the boot room (designed safe place) then Roy Kent will be there and be very tender with you.
Whatever you need.
#tv: ted lasso#roy kent#He’s here he’s there he’s every f*cking where#But try the boot room first#He’s in there with a distressed player#issac mcadoo#jamie tartt#amazing writing/acting/epic#afc richmond#this dynamic#Roy’s great with Isaac his chosen Captain#But still no where near as close to Isaac as he is to Jamie
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there's this guy at my parents church that can play like thirteen different instruments because his job has him travel a lot and when he goes to new places he finds new instruments and buys them and gets locals to teach him how to play and honestly thats so Wylan Van Eck of him
#every time he comes home from a trip he has a new instrument and jesper just sighs and goes to make space in the music room#he of course teaches marya how to play them all#and puts on a lil show for jesper#the maids have to come ask him how to clean it so they dont ruin it#wylan van eck#wylan hendriks#six of crows#crooked kingdom#shadow and bone tv#six of crows headcanons
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The most homophobic character in Death Note is actually the telephone for interrupting every single moment of unbearable sexual tension between L and Light
#when you think about it it happens like every time#Just like... when you're watching them together and have to start tugging uncomfortably on your collar to let the steam out#you always hear a cell phone ring and somebody else had a heart attack on live TV or whatever else#'We've got to call the room and stop them!!" No you don't omg stfu it was just getting good#l lawliet#light yagami#lawlight#p
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My thoughts on how the Milgram mv machine works based on the evidence we have:
(I know there’s been discussion about where exactly the interrogations take place, but wherever they are,) the prisoners are made to sit in a specific chair near the wall that houses the machine.
It’s ordinarily hidden, but the wall panels shift aside to reveal it when the mechanical sounds play in the dramas. As well as the walls moving, the chair transforms to restrain the prisoner and attach whatever it takes to access their brain. The fact that none of the more frightened prisoners try to run or break it makes it seem like they physically cannot. This is why Fuuta sounds so panicked, and why Amane is suddenly helpless in front of Es in their T1 vds.
(My mind conjures very classic sci-fi mad scientist machines with wires, pipes, lights, nodes, needles, etc, but I’d love to hear how other people visualize it.)
In some vds (maybe all? I’d need to check,) you can hear Es take some steps right before their iconic line -- it would make sense that for safety reasons, the power mechanism is placed across the room. Once again it could be anything, but the sound effect makes me think of one of those giant wall-mounted levers you have to pull down.
The voice dramas don’t really provide the type of crime details that an actual interrogation would reveal, and it’s odd that they’re placed before the extraction rather than after Es gets to see the new details. This leads me to believe the machine functions with priming. All Es needs to do is get them talking about their murder, so it’s on their mind.
The video produced is much like a (non-lucid) dream. Even if the prisoners figure out that this is how it works, they can’t control it just by thinking really hard about something else. The murders produce the strongest emotional affect, and that’s what it picks up on. If someone else used the machine, it would default to whatever gave them the strongest emotional reaction in the ~15 minutes beforehand, hence why Es’ video focuses on their daunting task ahead. (The Undercover theory is still a bit loose, though, given the private shots that Es wouldn't have known about). It’s why the videos are usually closely linked to the vd topics/beats. I also like to think that the reason their prisoner colors appear so much is because they’re looking at those colors on their uniform 24/7.
The bell rings to inform Es that it’s the optimal time to use the machine -- the prisoner has been thinking about things for long enough that the video will be about their crime, and if the conversation lasts much longer they’ll start thinking of other things. It’s at a different time for each prisoner because it’s based on the specific conversation. I guess Jackalope is listening in to the interrogation, timing it perfectly. (The only one that kind of messes with this theory is Yonah, because they just keep talking afterwards lol, but it could just show that the interrogation is still in Es’ control.)
Their “Sing your sins” is the final priming nudge to get them to think of their actions as a sin, revealing their guilt.
Once activated, the prisoner enters a sort of trance/sleeping state. It’s very much like REM sleep, with the machine forcibly activating neurons and recording the output. The prisoners have asked Es what they saw, meaning they don’t remember the mvs. I like to think the prisoners do experience the mv in real time, acting as the major version of themself that appears, but can’t remember it afterwards. It’s when you experience a dream, but as soon as you wake up you’re just left with fleeting emotions and memories right on the tip of your tongue.
The video plays immediately upon extraction -- whether on a huge projection or little screen depends on which room it’s in. It simultaneously saves the memory so that Es can rewatch it later (on those old TVs in the jailbreak mix). The machine downloads the song and video together, but requires special parts to retrieve them. The technology is pretty new and fragile, so if one is broken, there might be a delay between when Es can hear the extracted song and see it with the video. (That’s my justification for Kotoko’s delays -- after 9 prisoners the parts wear out, or maybe Mikoto himself overheats it with his complex situation.)
Based on the lack of conversation we get afterwards, I picture Es leaving before the prisoner wakes from the trance. The machine adjusts their brain back to normal before they awaken, restraints freed and able to return to the rest of the prison.
It’s very much like a dream, so it’s not harmful despite the amnesia/head injuries the prisoners have. It does, however, exhaust them. Brain activity alone takes a lot of energy, so forced brain activity with added emotional strain would cause them to feel pretty drained the rest of the day.
#milgram#👍👍#if theres anything contradictory please lmk -- this is how ive been taking the evidence we have so i definitely want to rethink things if#theres a mistake#but also i just wanna hear what people have been picturing 🤔#i mentioned it before but the jailbreak tvs really did shift my brain from sleek tech to clunky old scifi vibes#im also still partial to an idea mentioned a long time ago about the prisoners waking up to catch the last few moments of their mv#and how heartbreaking that can be for some#but i feel like it would make more sense if there was no direct interaction after the extraction since es is overwhelmed with different#reactions (from us) and the prisoners themselves are raw with emotion and fatigue#i like the thought of interrogations occuring in that big courtroom (seen in undercover and now deep cover)#but that room seems way too echo-y for the vds to take place in#and it seems overkill to build every cell with moving panel walls and access to the machine#so the jurys still out on that one#(also hehe im still so excited that my oc fits very nicely into all of this but i kept this post 100% canon compliant)#analysis/thoughts
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i love you armand i love you armand but
SIR
armand, 500yo vampire who's seen some shit and does what he wants during his interview: "okay so fuck memory is a monster. history is written by the victor"
me watching this as a longtime book reader, screaming crying laughing throwing up high-fiving the audacity
#i'm not saying memory isn't a monster#and memory is definitely the monster for louis and daniel#but LOL ARMAND. SIR.#we sailed way past subjectivity and soared past creative embroidery right into RPF#i love your solid steel cojones#and also i'm kind of ill at his hit piece as a longtime book fan but i'm breathing into a paper bag it's fine it's cool this is peak tv#we don't know the whole story#which didn't stop me from muttering WHAT THE FUCK CONSTANTLY during every 1795 scene SCREAM#iwtv#iwtv spoilers#interview with the vampire#interview with the vampires spoilers#iwtv s2#history is written by the victor i.e. the guy with the wet room
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I've referenced before how I have a big google document to keep track of every media I've ever seen in my entire life (just for reference because I like to track everything possible lol… I am the Data Collector), but recently as I was updating it, I thought of actually evaluating them to find out random percentages (like for example, out of Total Shows Watched, what percentage did I finish vs. stop watching, what percentage did I like or dislike, etc.)...
Evaluating these things is made easier by the fact that I already place everything on each subsection of the list into 6 broad ranking categories, so I don't have to go back and guess to figure out how I feel about them or anything. The categories are: Ranking 5 - overall best* (despite some criticisms of course because I'm too much of an Analyzer to ever find anything Perfect lol) Ranking 4 - more positive than neutral, but not good enough to be 5 Ranking 3 - either the good + bad negate each other, OR it's just not memorable/interesting in any way enough to be ranked higher or lower (this is the Default category ALL things are placed in if no other rank applies) Ranking 2 - maybe a few redeemable elements but largely more negatives than positives Ranking 1 - So bad that it circles around to being fascinating to observe in some way (not necessarily Funny, or Good, but just interesting somehow) Ranking 0 - Bad in a genuinely frustrating or obnoxious manner
*("best" primarily defined here as most interesting, rather than most good in a technical sense, or some other measure. I tend to value more highly whether there's something novel or thoughtful about the worldbuilding, tone, writing, base premise, etc - than about whether it's actually executed perfectly.)
And here's the amount of shows that have so far been placed into each category -
TV shows ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 20 shows ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 28 shows ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 114 shows ~ Rank 2 (mid low) -33 shows ~ Rank 1 (low low but intriguingly so) - 14 shows ~ Rank 0 (iredeemably low) - 2 shows
This would make for a total of 211 TV shows overall. However, there are 57 shows within these list marked as "didn't finish" (typically meaning I quit on the very first or second episode - but log them still to keep a record that I at least had a brief view of them).
So my total of genuinely fully watched shows would be more 154. 211 Total, but a More Accurate Total of 154.
Counting them all and using the Total Number Of The List (211) -- that means roughly 9.5% of all total shows I have ever watched (or at least attempted to watch) have been Mostly Good, 13% have been Moderately Okay, 54% have been either entirely Forgettable or some mix of good + bad that lands them right in the Neutral Middle, 15.6% have been Mostly Bad, 6.6% have been Bad (but in an interesting way), and 0.9% have been Terribly Bad.
Additionally, I didn't even get past the first two episodes of about 27% of the total.
Sooo, discounting ones I didn't finish, my total TV shows ever watched in my life would be about 154 (maybe give or take a few, assuming I might have forgotten some from very long ago).
But instead of entire life, let's just say this is the total for 'About 20 Years' (so, not counting very early childhood when I likely wouldn't remember things I saw/have no detailed recollection of them (like for example, I'm sure at some point when I was like 4yrs old I must have seen an episode of Spongebob or something, but I have zero distinct memories of it, can't quote anything of it, and barely recall the premise - so I don't count it on the list, etc.)).
In that case, 154 divided by 20 would be roughly 7.7 shows a year.
Which is actually surprisingly low considering that I often have stuff on in the background for hours whilst I make sculptures and do costumes and stuff (maybe I should have also marked some distinction between 'things I fully paid attention to' and 'things I kind of half listened to whilst sculpting', but that would further split the categories too much probably lol), but I guess a lot of that is youtube videos or random documentaries, so .. eh.. maybe I get it being lower.
Now, doing the same thing for movies-
Movies ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 4 movies (3.4% of total) ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 12 movies (10.3% of total) ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 91 movies (78.4% of total) ~ Rank 2 (mid low) - 8 movies (6.8% of total) ~ Rank 1 (low but interesting) - 1 movie (0.8% of total) ~ Rank 0 (irredeemably low) - none in this category (0%)
That makes 116 for a Total (Actually Remembered) Movies Watched In Lifetime (Or At Least In 20 Years).
116 divided by 20 is roughly 5 or 6 movies a year (I feel this has probably been skewed though by adding everything since like elementary school onwards, as I remember a lot more movies from child/teen years.. Whereas, the past 3 years I feel like I've barely seen maybe even 5 movies?? lol). I also have "Didn't Finish" marked on 18 of them. Which means I quit halfway through about 15% of the total movies.
So, a for broader summary stuff..
I seem to be less forgiving to movies than tv shows, by far. Which makes sense to me, I guess, because I love elaboration and details, so "short form" things that only last an hour or two are often lost on me a bit. My biggest complaint with movies is indeed usually walking away just wishing there had been more exposition, more scenes where characters are doing nothing, more "mindless bantering" conversations, more Quiet Downtime and Lore Elaboration and so on lol, so... of course most 1-2hr films end up feeling a bit Not Enough To Draw My Interest/Nothingy to me.
If you count 5 and 4 as "like" and rankings 2 to 0 as "dislike", then for TV shows I at least somewhat liked 48 of them, and at least somewhat disliked 47 of them.. So it's almost exactly the same lol. I'm just about equally as likely to find something bad as I am to find something redeeming about it. But overall, the largest chance is that I just won't really care much for it at all and it will be tossed into the 'neutral' pile, forgotten forever. Movies have a bit better of a balance, "liking" 16 of them, and "disliking" only 9 of them. So I'm slightly more likely to enjoy a movie than to find it annoying - though still VASTLY more likely to just not find it anything in particular, possibly not even finishing it.
ANYWAY.. this is vague and literally pointless, but like I said, I just really find information fun. Like my document where I've rated every apple flavor I've ever tried (like 40 of them now?), or reviewed every oreo flavor (32?), or ranking data from my entire 10 years of Trying To Make Friends process (out of 100 people, roughly 8% chance of a moderate compatibility, 3% chance of high), or etc. etc.. I love to have random pointless things to analyze I suppose lol.
I doubt anyone tracks things in their life in this same exact way, but I'd be interested in hearing any at least somewhat similar data !!! (like, how many TV shows you watch a year on average, and what percentage of those you like vs. dislike (if you keep track of that sort of thing), etc.)). I guess it might be easier with movies, since I think some people use those websites where you curate a list of movies you've seen and you can rate them or something, so maybe the numbers are already available on those places. :0
#maybe this is my version of spotify wrapped lol.. Lifetime Media Google Doc Wrapped.. kind of.. except I'm not going over specific titles.#I can't do this with music since I rarely EVER look for new music or add to my Youtube To MP3 folder library as I just don't really#listen to music that often. When I'm working (the majority of when I seek background noise) I need like.. people's talking voices#for some reason. Just instruments and singing are not distracting enough to me to work as background noise because theyre#almost TOO in the background if that makes sense? like if I put music on then I just tune it out and it's virtually no different#than if I were daydreaming stream of consciousness thoughts in an entirely quiet room lol. And I can't really do it with books since#essentially 100% of what I read is non-fiction. usually about some specific subject or academic topic OR stuff like#1800s magazines or cookbooks or historical people's diaries. Which is not really.. the type of thing I would#rank as easily I guess? like 'ooh yeah putting the sociology textbook in my top 5 hee hee right next to the 1920s radio recipes book' lol.#Then for games... I just sadly dont play enough of them. I've been banned from new games as I've told myself I cant play anyting#long form (no rpgs or etc) until I actually finish MY OWN game first - to keep me from wasting time. so on average#I play... 0 new games a year. ToT... I do play the sims sometimes but that's really all (which is not a new game at all since#I've been playing it on and off for years). Thus I guess movies/TV are really the only things that make sense#to collect this sort of information on. I could do youtube videos I guess also but that seems kind of strange like...#giving a rating to every single video I watch in a ranked list lol.. Especially since I would say a good 85% of the time#they are exclusively background noise whilst I'm working on something or cleaning the house or etc. and not things I pay serious attention#to. There are only a few specific topics/types/creators of videos I watch where I'm ACTUALLY sitting in front of a screen paying#direct attention to the content (usually when it's educational or political things). Everything else is too mindless to even rank.#ANYWAY... ever analyzing my little hermit Weird Relationship To Media (in the sense of seemingly not processing or getting the same#things out of it as many other seem to). I think that can contribute sometimes to the whole difficulty socializing and stuff#since our culture is very centered around media consumption generally speaking. People want to talk about The New Movie that came#out or The Big TV Show Of The Year. and for me it's like.. highly likely I just plain have NOT seen it. Or if i have. statistically#I most likely was entirely ambivalent if not slightly negative towards it lol. Which just kind of takes the steam out of a 'fun' 'casual'#conversation and you seem like a bit of a bummer if most of your only feedback is either 'idk what that is' or 'oh yea... i did#see that one.... i didnt like it all that much though... I think it'd be better with elves in it.. and 7 hours longer..'' lol..#Which I am not disliking things in a 'grr i hate it bc its popular'/just to be contrarian way. I actually dislike that mindset/find it#silly (by striving so hard to be counterculture you are thus still defining yourself by the whims of external culture - just in the#opposite direction. but are still just as preoccupied with the mainstream (going against it) as everyone else. etc. lol..)) In my#case I think it IS just having niche hyperspecific tastes.. for example- it peeves me when cell phones are in media bc I dont want to be#reminded at ALL of the real world. so.. cross off anything set in modern times. so on & etc. Judging all things by these weird criteria lol
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the most gorgeous man I've ever known sent me a drunk voice message hurt that i left my job at the bar he goes to without telling him and adding that he saw me on tv speaking about palestine, which turned into me telling my ex boss to give him my number, and the sober voice message was much worse because this sweet guy just tells me that he's so proud of me and then i can feel him like talking with a constricted throat saying he understands that i left and closes with "from the river to the sea" and doesn't it just suck that some things have no hope of ever beginning and yet still end somehow
#there is literally no way something could have come of it he lives in that pub and i don't want to go back there#he has addiction problems and I never had a relationship with anyone#it still sucks that these are facts cause i liked him a lot. and also im not kidding when i say he is the hottest dude I've ever seen.#this is maybe the first time i wish i was heterosexual and/or have less impulse control#radio live transmission#sorry over sharing again cause the psychologist still has to tell me when the first appointment will be#(they kinda also told me i dont really need one which is funny bc the first time i try not to do things alone in my life#bc im pretty sure this hyper self reliant and aloof behavior might be a problem and im told actually im doing splendid.#i won at therapy ig)#also i told everyone there that i moved back home because im a lying liar and#thank god he still hasn't done the math that he saw me on tv still in turin#ive had Cold as Ice by the Foreigners playing on loop the entire day trying to get back in character#like. you'd think if i HAVE to experience something close to heartbreak then at least i could have had sex with the#hottest guy in the city. no. i just get the half assed symptoms of it after having conversations with him every weekend for three months#ranging from his cocaine addiction to police violence to the one time he was staring at nothing by the store room where i went to pick stuf#and he offered to take me to miami and i panicked and joked that he didnt have the money and left.#this sucks.
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#gotham#gotham 2014#gotham tv#gotham posting#edward nygma#juno’s bitch wife#i think abt this scene every day#who in the editor’s room saw this and was like#Yeah this is fire let’s release it
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It is becoming increasingly clear to me that I need to fully clean and reorganize my room but also I am demonstrably bad at that, please someone just kill me now
#jk it'll be fine#I'm just not having fun because i got a lot of stuff for christmas (that i like! and am grateful for!)#but there's already stuff on every single surface and half the floor#and it's just aaaaaaaaaah i just want a break where i can just watch tv in my room and knit and not feel guilty about that
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i genuinely love when you can tell an older show was Not made with high quality video viewing in mind. i am watching knight rider and constantly seeing all the little mistakes they surely brushed under the rug thinking nobody would see them on their crunchy little CRTs back in the 80s, that are huge attention grabbers now in HD fullscreen on my 3 foot computer monitor
the biggest one of course is all the drivers/controllers for the (in-universe) self driving car, kitt. there's guys tucked down in the footwells who can't always stay out of the shot. there's a guy who has a Car Seat Suit to blend in and look like the drivers seat from a distance, but you can always tell when that's the method they're using for a particular shot because its so much thicker than the passenger seat next to it and the headrest is missing it's cutout section. in at least one instance he starts taking the suit off too early, on a focus shot of the damn car, so its REAL visible.
all the extremely obvious stunt drivers or performers who look nothing like the character they're supposed to be
props, such as animals, vanishing from the car interior for stunt/race sequences.
the production crew (or their shadows) being visible in the background. only at a glance, but its especially hilarious in shots where nobody else is supposed to be around
the camera panning out from a sound stage set far enough that you can actually see over the edges of the set and into the stage they were filming in. mostly this happens with their truck trailer mobile unit thing.
this one isn't a mistake but every time the car "turbo jumps" they CLEARLY hide the ramp behind another car, a prop, the environment, and its just. so charming. sometimes its blatantly on screen just for a moment. like... of Course in real life this car isn't magically leaping 20 feet, of course its a ramp, but it's still so silly and fun to be reminded of how they were doing those stunts to begin with.
also not really a mistake but related, the bracket they keep on the front of the car for stunt work.... is just left on half the time. cuz it's a pain to take on and off.
and there are more examples that are more unique that haven't cemented themselves in my head well yet, but these are the more notable or common things i see and it's really charming. if i'm not giggling to myself noticing the "seams" and flaws and so human imperfections of your show or movie what EVEN is the point. hollywood is too flashy these days i think!
#liz blogs#knight rider#kr#tv production#1980s#television#i dont even know if this is a 'older tv' thing or if its just a knight rider thing because i've seen all of classic columbo at this point#and i think i can think of... maybe one or two times you saw the edges of a sound stage room. and thats it#i dont know Why its like this i dont know how common it is for shows of the era but i love it to bits. cannot get through an episode#with somebody without pointing out the quirky little things i notice.#y'know what hollywood really can burn there is such a great backlog of media to watch#i need to gif that guy pulling off his Seat Costume in the MIDDLE of the SHOT. that was so fucking funny. my favorite blooper so far#a lot of these have to do with kitt bc he IS a prop but its extremely funny how hard they push the 'HES INDESTRUCTIBLE' thing#and every other boost landing has the car looking like its gonna snap in fucking half like a twig. got some ROUGH landings#i wanna know how many stunt kitts they went through they really beat the shit outta those cars sometimes#i think if this show were free on streaming like columbo way more people on this site would like it it is a weirdly charming little show
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thinking about scully sitting on the floor of mulder’s apartment just holding him as he wept after his mother’s death and after she told him through tears that it’s time to stop. it’s time to stop looking for his sister.
and how she had already told him that once, seven years earlier, a month into their partnership, when she chased him out of a police station and told him to stop running after his sister because it won’t bring her back.
she called after him to just stop, because she’s the scientist, and that’s the logical conclusion that she had reached.
except later that night, he told her why he does it. that he’s been closing his eyes and walking into that room, thinking maybe, when he opens them, his sister will be there, since he was 12 years old. “every day” of his life.
and she never told him to stop again.
until seven years later, when she rocked him on the floor, and then the next day was asked “why do you want to bring all this back up now?” and answered, “someone owes it to mulder.”
so she started looking. she reopened files, she tracked down records, she went to his mother’s house to dig through the trash. she confronted CSM about what he knew, she flew to california, she held hands and prayed.
she looked at mulder and said “it hurts me to tell you this” and stayed steady in the truth anyway. she listened to him read to her about a 14-year-old girl’s pain, held his hand and told him to get some sleep. she stayed up, kept looking, and found it. “i got it, mulder. i couldn’t believe it when i saw it. it was like it was looking for me.”
the police report from when samantha ran away.
she read the hospital records, went to the home of the nurse who signed the intake report, asked him if he wanted her to go herself.
she left him by the car and walked up and knocked, asked about a patient in 1979. she listened as the nurse described how “you couldn’t forget her or how frightened she was. scared for her sweet life.” and the man who came for her, who wouldn’t put out his cigarette.
earlier the day before, she had been told to just stop. “word of advice, me to you: let it be. you know, there’s some wounds that are just too painful ever to be reopened.”
and she had responded, “this particular wound has never healed. and mulder deserves closure.”
after seven years, she knows now, that you can’t just stop chasing. she knows how heavy grief is, and she‘s seen the effects of carrying it alone. of walking into the worst night of your life every day, eyes closed, hopeful.
you can’t just stop, and you can’t really have closure, but you can help someone carry it.
and ultimately, that’s what made this the end of the road. sometimes the heaviest burden of grief is feeling that pain is all there is left of someone, and that alleviating it would be to abandon them.
scully’s right, this wound has never closed, but there’s freedom in shared remembrance and shared dedication. she doesn’t ask him to stop until he’s ready to know the truth, and she’s willing to find it. she doesn’t ask him to rest until it’s safe for him to, because it’s not forgetting samantha. she knows and she remembers.
#i’m having a tough week thank you all for your consideration#i forgot that that police report file just found her. god#these girls love mulder so much#they’re always working in tandem#it means so much esp with the death of his mother that someone else in the world just remembers#it’s mulder in the pilot saying ‘no one ever talked about it’ and how everyone just pretended she never existed#it’s the childhood photos that scully sees burnt in the trash#everyone tried to just erase her from existence so much that mulder had to dedicate his entire life to remembering her#but it’s lighter now#someone else knows#someone else knows that they spent their summers playing baseball and that they argued over the tv and that he’s looked for her#in every room that he has ever been in#someone else knows what happened to her and the horror that she suffered and how she wrote that they didn’t even treat her like a person#how she wrote that she just wishes she could see her brother’s face#sometimes that matters more than any reveal or any truth or any conspiracy#she’s going to be remembered and she’s going to be thought of and loved#even if he goes home and gets some sleep#even if he stops looking#txf.txt#closure#sein und zeit
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can't stop listening to complex and many
natalie holt why do you make my heart hurt with the most beautiful soundtrack/score of all time
#the scene where loki timeslips back to the interrogation room is my favorite of the show#but i cry every time without fail#and the music in this show is legitimately everything#this track is my favorite next to purpose is glorious ofc#loki#loki series#loki tv show#natalie holt#complex and many#lokius#loki laufeyson#mobius m mobius#loki soundtrack#loki music#loki score#text post
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Marco and Polo TVGLOW are very... Queer coded, in a way that I cannot quite articulate. They just hit that "Hays Code Era Queer Coded Villain" spot in my brain, you know?
#which is interesting considering how mr melancholy himself seems to be mostly about repression#i guess there is something to be said in the repression of seeing yourself portrayed as the villain only#i saw the tv glow#bad literary analysis#putting on the movie again#i'm still thinking about election day. and what it means. i'd love to discuss it with some like-minded people#how it blurs the line between real election candidates and movie directors#and somewhat reminescent of like a radio operator room#tvglow really gets me because god it makes the pink opaque feel so real#that was such a great feat#tvglow is a masterpiece i want to dissect every part of it#i wanna leave no stone unturned#obsessed
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'the batman': another film where instead of being horrified by the rats who being slandered i went "awwww, zoom in on their little pawsies! oh wow you actually got agoutis with normal ears in for your sewer rats,* well done. WEE NOSES!! OMG!!"
*you might think this is an obvious and easy win but oh wow the number of sewers and cloisters and catacombs infested with hooded dumbos would SHOCK you**
**if you know a perfectly normal amount about rats, as i do
#rats!!!#bit unimpressed by the film otherwise; it could have used more rats but that's true about every film bar possibly rataouille.#AKA The One Pixar Movie I Have Seen Right Through#there's a fantastic elementary episode that opens with 'blood covered rats' which is a room full of ADORABLE RATSIES WASHING THEMSELVES!!#sorry TV Show Guys if you put something on a rat the rat WILL instantly try to clean it off. they're not SLOVENLY!
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