#tricking my brain into doing the thing
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we really do need to talk more about bill chasing after dipper post-weirdmaggedon. at first because he wants to piss off ford/make him jealous & then later because he actually legitimately starts liking dipper more than he ever liked ford.
#cyber.com#billdip#LIKE!!!!!!!!!!!#insane take but i think billdip would be way less toxic than biIIford.#bc the relationship ford had w bill was ‘poisoned’. like. it turned sour. it started off super positive and ended. well.#with dipper on the other hand. bill never pretended to be anything but who he was. yes he tricked dipper in sock opera but dipper never once#trusted him.#so in my mind. this leaves their relationship no where to go but up. lmfao.#all masks are off. they can be as honest and nasty with each other w/o having the underlying current of. you betrayed me/you took advantage#of me#that biIIford does.#is this making sense. they r doing crazy things to my brain. LMFAO
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how have I never thought about how Hawks' favorite hero was Endeavor, when he himself acknowledges that his quirk's greatest weakness is fire and Shigaraki's favorite hero was Eraserhead, the one hero who could take his quirk away
#i am unwell about the parallels between these two at all times but this hit me like a truck#something something the appeal of no longer bearing the responsibility of the thing people have been using you for almost all your life#or something#i've had emotions before about the whole 'you really are so cool eraserhead' thing but like i'm thinking about how technically#afo could have taken shigaraki's quirk away at any time#and shigaraki knew that#he could probably have even taken it and given it back to learn how better to teach him#kind of like what aizawa wanted monoma to do for eri#like. another layer to this for me to rotate in my brain#and also. both hawks' and shigaraki's quirks are so integral to the purpose they've been raised for be that to save or to destroy#me when i do basic reading comprehension: 😮#takami keigo#shigaraki tomura#liza blather#doing the theres no good tricks but old ones dvd commentary and i just stop and stare into the middle distance for a bit
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i realized it while drawing that redesign for Xaror, but they really do look like i just did a somewhat cheap knock off of Kayn/Rhaast from league of legends oh my god
- i have had Xaror/Xanthriels rough design and lore for .. im pretty sure years before that champion released and even after it i actually never thought about it (unless you count liking aatrox and rhaasts designs, or i guess darkin in general, ... bc i just like those kind of monster designs, who would have guessed xD)
(for anyone that doesnt know league, this is rhaast (not my art, i wish it was, this is official riot games art .. also that art goes hard, i love rhaast alot)
hes a corrupted god warrior trapped in a weapon thats trying to take over his wielder (kayn, dont care for the guy) and once he succeeds this is how he looks, they also talk and banter constantly)
after merging back together i imagined Xaror and Xanthriel doing similarly, though much less as a struggle for control over the body, Xaror is more like a weirldy knowledgable teenager that does whatever he wants and Xanthriel just kinda watches and chimes in every now and then like a disappointed parent
(ngl realizing this isnt exactly helping me not feel like a fraud, but i dont think i can change xaror just bc of it, hes too woven into everything of my oc stuff .. q-q)
#ganondoodles talks#how do i accidental knock offs#i swear i did not realize it unti l like .. yesterday#i guess im just that unoriginal and my brain just tricks me to forget im influenced by the things i like#I DID have them as a character before rhaast though#so whos the real knock off HUH#(mostly joking)#i still feel a little weird about it now#league isnt exactly a small or less known game ... so if someone knows rhaast they are gonna think i pulled a mobile legends#q-q#ALSO hate that the whole letter X is now a sore spot bc i named my ocs with it before i even knew elmon schmusk existed
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You know what the worst feeling I've been having lately is? Wanting more than anything to get back into Actual Art again but finding a sudden anxiety that stops me. Even if I'm still as capable as I was, it's the mental block. It's why I've all but kept commissions closed for this whole time: this overwhelming fear of letting people down. Especially in times as troubled as these, where money is tight, and patience is thin. I've always been blessed with such patient and considerate commissioners, but I would hate to test people because of my malfunctioning brat of a brain.
I just wish it came to me as easily as it did before the massive burnout/medication. But it's up to me to come up with my own motivation. And it's ME.
Anyway. Thanks as always for sticking around despite... all of this. I'll get back on the horse soon.
#text post#april rambles#it's stupid because I WANT to do it#but even wanting to do things doesn't trick my jerkass brain#the meds helped some things and fucked other things#I'm still trying to reshape my relationship with watercolor#I haven't touched it enough and yet I'm trying to learn more#which sounds dumb#but so is anxiety am i right?#so i've been poking linocut because i don't feel bad being awful or unskilled at it or whatever#it's no pressure#and I'm disproportionately afraid of pressure now#which is something the medication can't fix#now if only I could purchase motivation and courage#I'm just so worried I'll disappoint people forever#you know how vicious cycles are#anyway i'm gonna get things done one way or another
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Since I still get (well-intentioned) people telling me "Hey, did you know that you can teach apes to use sign language?", if you don't know already, Koko the gorilla almost certainly couldn't really talk with signing, the videos of her doing so have high evidence of doctoring and behind-the-scenes coaching, the majority of animals in the whole ape language project were abused (including Koko herself), and the studies were butchered and manipulated for media attention. As for now, there is no real evidence that apes can understand and use language much more than a dog can learn to connect symbols and noises with meanings, for example.
#the human brain has specifically developed for language comprehension and usage in a way other animals have not#it really makes no sense for another ape to learn to talk in that way#not jojo related#primate posting#animal abuse tw#this is probably my number three least favorite thing people bring up to me when they try to talk about apes with me#(as much as i understand they're coming from a good place)#number two being harambe and number one being those damn ''obviously abused primate doing 'cool' tricks'' videos
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ive made myself more wet and pathetic
#new icon because im SUFFERING. im in HELL#its so bad. i had to sign out of discord so now im both lonely and stressed#because i KNOW im still gonna get dstracted. i just did making this URGH#how good are brains at working around things. i once set a 7AM alarm on my phone with snooze cause i was so sure my brain would#be too lazy and keep snoozing instead of actually turning it off. but nay it either kept sleeping through the alarms and snoozing#or actually managed to turn off the alarm half awake that i barely remembered it and then waking up late#i actually have a track record of climbing out of bed and turning my alarm off without remembering. which is impressive bc i have a loftbed#the other thing is setting fake deadlines so make myself panic into doing things ahead of time. but unfortunately that doesnt work either#because if theres one thing my brain will put all its energy into remembering its self assurance. meaning i WILL be able to remember#the real deadline even if i try to trick myself. cant ask someone to give me a fake deadline either#the only things keeping me going rn is that i have deadlines due at least 1 day between each other and excitement being able to talk with#crow after break. but you can see how well thats going <- ignores long term rewards in favor of short term pleasure#BTW CROW IF YOURE READING THIS IM SO SORRY TURNING OFF MY DISCORD WITH BARELY ANY EXPLANATION#im a huge fucking dumbass and i had barely enough impulse control not to block everyone in my dms because i realized that would send a real#really bad msg. youre not distracting me im distracting myself and i promise youre not annoying me i just really like talking to you and#thats why im just barely stopping myself from signing in. I WANT TO TALK TO U LOTS BUT AT THE SAME TIME IM KICKING MYSELF FOR DOING IT#you can be a little mad at me btw cause i definitely could have done that better but i was all over the place abt how to do it without#making u think im ignoring you. IF THAT MAKES SENSE. SORRY#yapping#doodles#puppysona#edit but last week i tried to schedule and give myself work periods and break periods using my class schedule#and reminders on my phone to tell me when to start and stop. can you guess what happened
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trick or treat!! 👻🎃🔮🧛♀️🦹♀️🧡🖤💜
So...uh...the survivalist AU I was telling you about? Yeah, it's not spawned into 2 separate ideas entirely.
The first is the more canon-ish one we were talking about. But I've got it a bit more fleshed out, with it being some kind of freak storm that forces the squad to work together and everyone ragging on Jake for not actually knowing anything and then Bradley, Bob and Halo being absolutely clutch with all the knowledge and know how to get them through it and back to town and safety.
but uh, the second idea is... well. There's age difference, with Bradley being 38 and daddy, and Jake being 19-21 and very princess coded. I have two ways I could take this one.
1, Bradley is hired on as Jake's bodyguard and Jake is kidnapped or at least an attempt was made and they have to trek through the forest/mountains and Bradley shows off his former SEAL training doing all this.
2, Jake gets kicked out of his parents place when they find out he's gay and goes to stay with his grandma (though only person happy and willing to take him in once it becomes open family knowledge on why his parents tossed him out) and Jake damn near swallows his tongue at meeting her new neighbor, Bradley, who is Jake's literal walking wet dream. Still not entirely sure how to work in the survivalist aspect into this but these thoughts will just not leave my mind.
Trick or Treat with Nixie!
#dracculaura#trick or treat with nixie#nixie answers#ask nixie things#I cannot stop thinking about the survivalist au#like it is living rent free in my brain#and not letting me think about other things#like I need to be doing#and the more I think about it the more ideas I get for how to do it#and it's like. really brain#PLEASE STOP and let me focus on other things#or at least settle on just ONE of the ideas#sereshaw#hangster
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Ten twirls Rose around sometimes when he needs a quick escape.
It's a win-win for both of them, he thinks! Rose always seems to enjoy, even if it's usually sudden and out of nowhere, and Ten gets to make her smile and slip away before she can even figure out what's just happened.
#I woke up in a haze and this is the first thing that popped into my brain#in my head they dance okay they dance and this is so so normal for them she doesn't even think twice about it#he spins her around and she loves it!!#(usually. when he's not doing it to make her purposely confused anyways)#like she's talking but he's just had an idea and doesn't want her to follow him so he grabs her hands and gives her a twirl#so she'll lose track of him and perhaps be a bit less angry when he suddenly disappears when she rights herself#she'll give a little huff when she realizes instead of being fun he's just tricked her but it's still fond#are you following? you should be#wish I could beam my thoughts perfectly into words on the screen it's so cute in my head#timepetals#tenrose#tenth doctor#rose tyler#doctor who
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I am exhausted, good heavens.
#hey watch this neat trick I can do [cries]#love that for me#BUT#BUT- the actual EFFORT I put these days to not make a suicide jokes is *chefs kiss* phenomenal#actively shitting bricks as I physically have to stop myself from saying I want a car to hit me for the 50th time that day#I am not progressing any more than I am downgressing or whatever the opposite word is. but girlies#and boysies and peepsies#my lipgloss is popping and my eyebags are gucci- and so I shall prevail#MAN this tiredness is BONE DEEP man- it's like it's engraved into my goddamn clavicles#sorry that was like the only bone name I could remember- I don't even know what a clavicle is#anyways- I need to fall asleep forever and never wake up. But not in like a dying way#I just need to stop waking up tired and being tired and going to sleep tired and living tired like GIRL#WTF AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WHEN SLEEP STOPS SLEEPING#I JUST SLEPT 10 HOURS HOW ARE YOU STILL TIRED#I am so tired that i stopped liking shit- like that SUCKS my dudes#I sometimes Don't Like art now and that is WILD to me because that was lowkey the One Thing that got me going#I used to actually LIKE english class! and reading Shakespear and shit!!!! and history class!! Now I don't!! Where did the spark go??????#Now everything feels like a chooooooore and it sucks major dick#and my graaaades are slipping because I stopped giving a damn but I NEED. TO. GIVE. A. DAMN#because those are like highkey lowkey and every-other-key my grades and I need them to go into uni so I don't die <333#I need to spite little mini me who said I wasn't going to live past 13 because BITCH- guess how old I'm turning next week????????#THAT'S RIGHT- 17 YEARS OLD- FUCK YEAH BABY I'M STILL NOT DEAD#SUCK MY BIG ASS SHLONG MINI-ME#and then I have a big biology exam the day after so- funnnnn!!#anywho- should I tag this as vent? this probably counts as vent right? like among us? impostor and shit?#sorry I think my brain is actively rotting out of my ears right now#vent post#personal vent#tw vent#tw sui talk
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What do you think the types of drunk would the murder trio be? Im pretty sure ask dusttale already answered this question about dust but i have to ask the mtt expert
see now askdusttale DID answer the question. but they didn't ANSWER the question when asked what dust is like drunk. they just said that dust is the type to drink himself blackout drunk. so that mean i have total freedom on deciding what the mtt are like drunk hehehe (rubs hands together in a villanous way that you would imagine nightmare doing or something idk)
i already have an absolutely hilarious idea for horror and it might just because i'm on the guilt section of his character analysis but i could TOTALLY imagine him being an emotional drunk. like he CRIES. horror sans man known for being incredibly guarded and private with what he feels bawling his eye out. he gets mad he gets sad he does not get happy because horror doesn't have the right to be happy. he is too upset over the fact that he fucking DOOMED all of horrortale because of his selfishness and nothing can stop him from being incredibly vocal about that fact so much so that killer had to tape his mouth shut because he wouldn't stop crying so loud. and then he just silently cries until he passes out from exhaustion. the alcohol has an incredibly strong effect on him because i dont think he would drink regularly plus he definitely hasnt drinken anything in those 7 years of starvation. it hits like a fucking plane crashing into him. or like getting his eye taken out again. either one!
another funny idea i had for killer would be like the alcohol affecting him but he SWEARS that he's still sober. he is very confused when he starts stumbling because wtf he doesnt FEEL drunk??? why is he bumping into walls and tables HELP WHY DOES HE SOUND FUCKING STUPID???? the alcohol is definitely effecting him but he swears he swears he doesn't feel drunk. hes not drunk its just the damn body doing this stupid bullshit!!!! he's still very aware of what's going on and is basically the same as sober but just like. he's wiggly he's wobbly and oh shit he just fell head face first into a tv whoops. he'd also have a high tolerance because just because. he can drink without feeling like shit until he just blacks out mid conversation with someone because his body couldn't take the toll of all the beer or whatever. hilarious idea triglycercule thank you triglycercule i know
dust in the context that we already know that he drinks AND he can fight against the human while like partially drunk.... i feel it would be kinda like a giggly drunk situation. except dust doesn't laugh at anything that's funny he only laughs when someone gets hurt or something. SADISTIC giggly drunk. because i can already imagine a half drunk dust laughing his ass off after killing the human and its a beautiful sight to me.
anyways imagine how it goes when you pair this sadistic giggly drunk with another that wont stop going through the 5 stages of grief and another that keeps on fucking falling over for no reason in his eyes. dream blunt rotation but the blunt is a bottle of vodka. i can already imagine it in my head and its fucking HILARIOUS. horror going on about how he caused the deaths of others and manipulated and tricked papyrus while killer is just trying his best to keep his eyes open because for some reason they won't stop trying to close. he is surprisingly getting frustated. dust has long since lost his voice laughing at this and he's just silent wheezing at everything. also phantom papyrus is only making the laughter worse because he keeps on making rude comments towards horror and killer and only he can hear him and its guffaw inducing. mtt amazing friend group you dont get shit like this anywhere else
#killer's breakdancing and he swears this isnt on purpose guys#GUYS GUYS ITS NOT ME THE BODY IS DRUNK OKAY WHY CANT I STOP WHEN DID I LEARN HOW TO DO THIS#horror has SO much to be guilty over its not even funny. ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY#nobody talks about this but this man is GUILTSTRIFEN. he is literally filled with so much guilt its not even funny#dust and killer have the genocides they did. ok. sure. that's it????#ugh god i dont wanna ramble in tags again..... im just gonna end up saying it in the analysis anyways but ughhhhhhhhhhh#yk what fine i'll rapid fire. trying to keep people from killing themselves. watching his friends die.#knowing that other monsters are getting eaten. worrying papyrus. coming up with a plan he knows wont work and tries make it happen#because that idea of them deconstrucing the core would NOT have worked so he did that out of selfishness#forcing his community to eat humans. tricking papyrus into eating humans. going against all his morals#dare i need say more i swear AND ALL OF THESE ARE SEPERATE THINGS TOO!!!!!!#he single handedly DOOMED horrortale into disarray by destroying the core#the eye idea wouldve worked. it wouldve been the only way monsterkind thrived#and yet he destroyed the core but kept his eye safe. as if one last big fuck you#you can have my eye but you cant have the machine that needs it. good luck bitches#THERE ALREADY WAS FOOD IN SNOWDIN BEFORE HE TOLD THEM TO EAT HUMANS#THERE COULD'VE BEEN ANOTHER WAY TO RATION THE FOOD OR FIND S FOOD SOURCE#BUT HE JUST TOLD TJEM TO EST HUMANS OUT OF SPITE SO UNDYNE WOULDN'T GET THE SOULS#granted it was a solution that worked for the hunger problem BUT HORROR FUCKING HATES IT#HE HATES THE IDEA OF EATING HUMANS HE HATES THE IDEA OF KILLING KIDS#BUT HE STILL DOES IT HE GOES AGAINST ALL HIS MORALS UGHHHHH#horror sans. horror sans my king horror sans my glorious lord and savior#i cannot WAIT to drop that character analysis. it will change lives. and by lives i mean me#i will be a changed man once the horror analysis comes out#anyways WHO IS THIS ANON AGAIN. its a question i always wonder because wtf#you have a daily question for me. this is like a log in event. if i answer all the questions in a row for a week i get a SPECIAL question#but fr thank you so much for your questions i love answering them its so fun to wrack my mind and figure out a way to answer it. brain teas#every time i see the words mtt expert i laugh lowly like an evil villain but i try not let it get to my head#humility is a standard i aim to uphold. one of my character traits. triglycercule character analysis when#tricule asks
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i hate when i can feel things affecting me but i dont know what to do about it. i dont know what to use 2 counter it
#evils r getting to me n fucking with my brain so hard i just want to b free#every thought i have feels like someone elses#everything i do feels so boring#everything feels wrong#but i dont know why#i dont know how to stop it#i want to play a game but then i just get stuck . thinking#not moving#and then i close it#and try something else & repeat#and the whole time theres just an Ache in me#jerma aint helpin this time gamers o(-<#i need 2 change my brain its locked on the wrong setting but i dont know what to do#i dont know how this time#i am just so incredibly tired all the time#my eyes hurt#my body hurts#every emotion hurts#i cant even sleep i wake up constantly n roll over n over n over#im never comfortable#i hate my body#i feel it all the time#i dont know if its just the paranoia and i got good at ignoring it or if everyone is staring at me more#i dont want to be seen . every time i catch a reflection of myself it hurts#i dont even have a phone 2 take pictures or a scale so i cant tell if im changing#i feel stuck#and like the worst thing in the entire world#i just want to be good for something#i wish i could just have a job already i wish i could skip forward i dont know how to get there. im useless. i just want to offer something#im not good for anything im not capable of anything i should hav killed myself yrs ago. i never should have tricked myself into having hope
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@ellionwrites
I just had the MOST diabolical thought for an Itafushi AU that immediately made me cry thinking about it.
Despite everything I need to do today AND all the other unfinished fics I have, I wanna drop it all to write this.
If this post gets even 1 note I'm doing it
#ellion I'm counting on you to enable me here#i won't write it for myself#but if even a single person expresses interest I can do it#i know how to trick my brain into doing things#i don't so much hold myself accountable as I pretend others are holding me accountable for imaginary things#healthy? no. effective? yes.#it's why Summer of Blue both is and is not being working on sporadically#anyways think about it: Orpheus and Eurydice Itafushi AU#Yuuji has to retrieve Megumi's soul#cry with me about it#itafushi#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro
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phone calls my detested
#i had to make a vet appointment and Wow i am not cut out for this whole independent adult thing lmfao#i had to write down a little script for myself...#i feel so bad for the receptionist i was stumbling and 'uhhhhh'ing my way through that call#fuck and when i was supposed to end the call. i didnt realize#I DONT KNOW THE PROTOCOL OKAY#do i hang up??? do i say bye??? she didnt say bye so was there something else i was supposed to say#she hung up so Yay but oughhhhhhh what the fuck#youre telling me people just Know how to carry a conversation? they just Know the routine? sounds fake#i had to rev myself up for the call too#put on a hat. put on sunglasses to trick my brain into thinking we're outside doing things thus fabricating confidence#phone in one hand fidget-dodecahedron in the other. Pacing#my brain is a normal brain that works perfectly fine thanks for asking#absolutely unprompted#i feel so connected to my neanderthal ancestors when i have to make a call#theyre being stalked by a smilodon... i have to talk to a person... same Fear <3#no but fr whenever i have to talk to someone my thought process shuts down Completely and i forget that im a living human being#fight or flight - neither. freeze and play dead#i think in my next life... i would like to be... a decorative plant#perhaps one of those tall ferns outside a seaside barbecue restaurant#i'd Win at that life. id be so good at photosynthesizing & rustling in the ocean breeze
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of all the things to turn into a ridiculous (cleaned up) long comic (i have PLENTTYY of sketched long comics) i chose: spader skips class
i still dont know how to panel comics but that s what practicing is. for
#in the sketchbook u can just draw a hundred little busts and it is fine#i always put too much space between my comic panels. much to think about.#ANYWAYS.#adventure time#wizard city#distant lands#spader#cadebra#digital#i get so embarrasseddrawing long comics. like hi. taking up a whole street here. sorry folks. sorry. has to be done.#if i dont draw one millions billion spaders a day ill die.#i wish hed lived long enough to have a fun class experience and everythign puts my hands on my head#'or the way ive seen you do it before?' <- has been unwillingly subjected to cadebras magic shows a million times#no one else will watch them. she needs an audience. (Saws herself in half for a booing spader and blaine) (its the only trick they enjoy)#'STELLAR!' has come into my brain forever now. i cant get a handle on his vocabularly but i think stellar! is part of it#spader king of knocking with one hand then lifting the other hand when the camera turns. oopsa daisy#i digitalized this entire thing ebcause 'oh- look. i dont think theyre gonna hurt me.' hurt ME. YES THEY DO. AUUGHGF. HATERED. AUGHGF.#ok enough tangents. bye now.
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What if I connected to a very unstable chassis then tried to kill you and your girlfriend wouldn't that be fun
#i need to redo my artfight refs and i needed to design the chassis part of vampire core for later on in the story#he has like an outfit change moment#is it even a portal story if theres not an evil bitch piloting the chassis /j#this is the same chassis seen in the portal coop dlc just with some changes so it's easier to draw#i think using this chassis works better than glados's because i don't wanna add glados to my oc story and vampire core does a lot coop tests#soo thats the vision#nothing against glados but id perfer to keep paradox as an oc only thing#and i don't wanna research how to write glados by reading her wiki page for hours#goddd i need to write the story outline before artfight comes#id like at least some of my characters to have lore on their pages ya know :)#i keep saying 'wow i need to write this already' then not doing it#oc writing is fun. i know its fun. i have fun doing it. but my brain tricks me into thinking its not fun and i don't like doing it#i got to the coloring stage before realizing I didn't like the brush i used for lineart so i had to redo it#but im glad i did it looks much better :) it also let me add the big claws i wanted him to have#i gave up on that puppet its an optional accessory for fun now sorryyyyyy#aughh i wanna animate so bad seeing my friends animate motivates me to do it too but I dont have timeeeee#portal#portal oc#Vampire core (oc)
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[The Final sugi dying kitten betrayal -> utsuro-gin fight -> sakura boat imagination -> completely tonally consistent with these ginpachi-sensei closer]
now listen. u know i would rather die than post five nearly-uninterrupted minutes of a fight scene. so take that into consideration.
#slight--#flashing#--in the first scene but i tried to cut the worst of it#sopping wet gintoki posting#videos#my computer is screaming at me. can i recall my thoughts.#i think theyre INSANE for that utsuro falling -> takasugi bound on the ground watching shouyou's execution transition.#rereading the manga fight scene. there IS some. how do i want to phrase this. unreliable perspective fuckery. retconning of memories.#nonliterality Mind Tricks. but like. things still happened. this movie here takes it so far that im like. IS GINTOKI EVEN REAL?#is this just the gintoki that lives in takasugi's dying brain and utsuro's dying brain that utsuro got from shouyou's humanity brain fungus#being his shinigami/psychopomp to walk him thru his first ever death. guhhhhhhh. littlest baby on the planet who is afraid of dying.#<- i love utsuro with all my heart. sorry for being mean to him at first turns out he's the char of all time meant for me.#anyways i think the movie is. SO BALLSY to stretch reality so far for their climax fight. and in such a. way.#taking place in complete silence. almost no actual fighting in the 200 Chapters Of Fighting arc fight scene conclusion.#reanimating so many key moments just to canonize the identity blurring triangle between three dead guys (tho gintoki gets kicked out of#the world of the dead on that sakura boat. sad.)#just a really ambitious thing to put in this aesthetically ugly and boringly standard as hell movie. AND TO SERVE WHAT END.#more standard as hell jump Power Of Friendship in the end. just with some extra weird cannibal ouroboros endless mirrors gay ass flavor.#<- gintama has always been abt making and surviving connections im not mad abt that but u know. got so generic lol.#thoooooo rereading the manga scene and understanding the plot more this time i do like the feeling that utsuro wasnt defeated so much as#just ran out his time. being kept busy from causing more problems in his final hours w a pointless fight hed never be able to turn down.#[about to digress 20 more times] anyways what else. theres an utsuro soft expression when he regrows sugi's arm that i like. interesting--#choice. i also cut it but i love gintoki wandering gaze avoiding sugis eyes dying in his arms. and his fighting back tears so badly.#the way the dynamic and emotionally destroying shot transitions dont stop even while sugi's dying. someone on staff was working their ass#off for him and i appreciate that.
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