#to move out and start a new life and find this job
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Exboyfriend Satoru! Who still keeps the secret polaroids he took of you when you weren't looking, safe and sound in his wallet. Nobody is taking those precious memories away from him.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who stole few things from you, The day before you decided to move out of your shared apartment and call the relationship quit on a mutual agreement.
They are small and irrelevant things,maybe that's why you didn't even noticed them missing in the first place. A hairband, a pair of blue flower earrings he always loved seeing on you and a old worn out shirt of yours that had stains and stretches all over it
They are special to Satoru because they carried You
They carried your scent, They carried your warmth, they carried your familiarity that he would die to feel and embrace again.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who finds it exhausting to come to an empty home. A little while ago the darkness and the bitter silence won't be the ones welcoming him when he opened the door. A soft giggle followed by a warm kiss to his cheeks, gosh how he miss those days.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who hasn't gotten a good sleep in weeks since the breakup. They say people fall asleep in the arms of their lover quickly, maybe it was right all along but Satoru knows he can't wish for those luxuries to be back. However what he truly wishes is for you to stop haunting in his dreams. Appearing in his dreams, looking at him with the same smile he used to adore on you so much. It's worsening the heartache he already have. He hopes you won't be that cruel.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who keeps himself distracted with his job. Taking in missions more than he normally would. But it ends up draining his energy instead making people around him a bit concerned by his unusual behavior.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who doesn't know how he's going to break the news to the students that you two broke up. Students loved you. Hell Yuji, Nobara and Megumi adored you! Satoru takes a deep breath as he calm himself before opening the classroom door.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who wants to hold your face in his hands again. To kiss it, to touch it, to caress it while he pinches your cheeks randomly so he can kiss the little frown appearing in your temple later.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who knows there's no going back when he sees you inside a bookshop with a random guy around his age a month later. You were smiling at him excitedly, showing him the books you chose. An action that is too familiar for his taste.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who wants to snatch you away the moment he saw you with that guy. You were supposed to be his. What you two had were special like no other, random guy can't compete with that. His inner voices says to him.
But you see Exboyfriend Satoru! is a loser who already accepted his defeat. That's why he turns away from your direction instead of confronting you. No matter how much his heart burned for him to get back to you, the love of his life.
Exboyfriend Satoru! who thinks the scars he gets from missions have been hurting more lately, maybe the key to healing them wasn’t his cursed energy all along, but the soft kisses you used to press against them after murmuring a wish for him to heal faster.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who finds himself looking out the window every single night recalling the memories from his past while keeping the hairband he stole from you in his hands, playing with it mindlessly.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who hates, no loathes it when your scent slowly started vanishing from his apartment, even from your shared bedroom.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who hugs your torn out t shirt hoping to smell your scent again but he has been hugging the t shirt to sleep for a good while now so the t shirt just ended up smelling like him.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who feels like he has gone crazy when he finally realize you are completely slipping away from his life. But he can't do anything other than look at the pictures of you together, yearn for the good days to be back.
Exboyfriend Satoru! Who admit it was his fault that your relationship turned out the way it is. If only he payed attention to you more, if only he stayed beside you more,if he only listened to your cries more, if he only took care of you more, if only there wasn't a big burden to carry himself with, if only the situation was entirely different.
If only he wasn't the strongest.
Oops Angst
#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#satoru gojo x reader#gojo x reader#jjk drabbles#jjk x you#jjk x reader#light angst#gojo angst#relationship#jjk gojo#satoru gojo
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See You At the Next Stop
Lily Evans meets a posh-looking bloke with messy hair on the way back to London, and for once in her life she actually enjoys a train ride. Maybe having a spontaneous seat partner isn't that bad after all.
Read on AO3 (2.9k words)
happy birthday, lily evans-potter! didn't have enough time to finish my punk!lily fic but i realized i never actually posted this fic from two years ago to tumblr so this is my contribution for today <3
Lily stared down the document in front of her, willing her brain to start writing words again. She had been on the train for nearly two hours now, travelling from Edinburgh to London. Visiting home had been yet another disaster, with Petunia continuing to judge Lily for moving to London after school and finding an inner-city job. Her sister liked to say that Lily was wasting her money trying to live on her own (which was a lie, Lily had a lovely roommate named Mary), and that she’d be better off staying home and finding a husband. Sometimes, Lily thought Petunia was stuck in the nineteenth century, but she blamed most of that on her horrendous boyfriend Vernon, who worked for a drilling company or something else of the sort – it seemed far too boring to keep track of.
Really, Lily had only gone home to visit their mum, following the two-year anniversary of her father’s death. His death had hit their family hard, despite them all knowing it was coming. Her father had suffered from cancer in his final years, but it still hurt knowing he was gone. Mr. Evans was Lily’s biggest supporter, encouraging her to attend Cambridge despite the monetary toll it would put on their family. He had helped her search for scholarships, and she ended up going to university for much lower than she ever could have expected without her father’s help. He was the one who helped her move to London, being there to help her move into her tiny flat despite him slowly growing weaker. She missed him every day, and she missed her mum, but she needed to be back in the city for work tomorrow.
Snapping out of her painful memories, Lily looked back at the half-empty document, with only a title and an introduction on it, not even in Times New Roman yet. She switched the font, the Arial irritating her, and leaned back into her seat. Even though she was on the high-speed rail, the train ride had felt impossibly long. She was seated next to some messy-haired Indian bloke, his glasses on top of his head and earbuds plugged in as he typed away on his own laptop. The man was gorgeous, to say the least, especially since he had unbuttoned the top collar of his dress shirt, and was wearing Converse with his slacks. Really, she couldn’t not admire him. Lily had a personal policy of not sitting next to men if she could avoid it, but he looked around her age and seemed relatively unassuming when he got on at Newcastle about an hour after her, and Lily found herself unable to say no. A part of Lily had wanted to ask him for his name, to know more about him, but he seemed to be a little bit of a mess as he got on the train. All he offered her was an apologetic smile as he struggled to shove his duffel into the overhead compartment as the train started moving. She smiled back at him, perhaps a little too eagerly in comparison to his semi-grimace. He had rolled up his sleeves as he sat down, and what was Lily supposed to do but stare at his well-defined tan forearms? He probably worked in some posh company, considering his attire (not that Lily could judge, she was still wearing business casual as well). Any time she peeked over at his laptop, he was typing furiously into some form of sheets that she truly could not decipher no matter how much she wanted to try. Looking away from him and turning her attention back to her own laptop, her brain felt like it was about to melt.
Deciding to take a break, Lily closed her laptop, ridding her mind of thoughts about her struggling article. She pulled out her phone, and seeing that her plan was about to run out for the month, she started to play some silly game that didn’t require any data. At that moment, the messy-haired bloke looked over, saying “Oh, I love that game!”
He had said it extremely loud, presumably because he was blasting music in his earbuds, but Lily laughed and turned towards him.
“Really? All my mates make fun of me for playing it – what level are you on?”
“Oh, don’t worry, my mates do the same. They say it’s because I still act like a ‘bloody child’ but I think I just enjoy a bit of mindless fun, y’know?”
Lily nodded, glad to see that she had something in common with the gorgeous bloke. He hadn’t told her what level he was on, but his smile and enthusiasm more than made up for it.
“Regardless, I’ll let you get back to the game, this project might be the death of me.”
She slumped back as gracefully as she could, disappointed that he was busy, but she shot him another smile and went back to playing her silly little game. After exhausting her thumbs, she genuinely felt like she had lost brain cells, choosing to just put away her phone and relax with some music. Putting her head against the seat, she closed her eyes and tried to stop thinking entirely. However, no matter how much she tried to empty her mind, the bloke next to her kept popping into her mind. She ended up just embracing it, allowing her mind to fill with thoughts of who he could possibly be as she felt herself drifting off into sleep.
Lily had no idea when she woke up, but she felt an impossible crick in her neck as she opened up her eyes. Quickly checking her watch for the time, she realized she had only been asleep for a little over half an hour, and sighed in relief – she’d still have time to try and work on her article again. However, as she tried to get up, she realized there was a weight on top of her head. Glancing upwards, she realized she had fallen asleep on the bloke’s shoulder, and he was leaning back on top of her head as his hands were stilled on his laptop. His shoulders were sturdy and broad, and Lily thought that she wouldn’t mind staying there forever. Not wanting to disturb him as he seemed utterly relaxed, Lily stayed put, hoping he’d wake up soon.
After a few minutes (that felt like a lovely forever), his head lifted off of hers, and she took the opportunity to escape. Before she could even look at him, she heard the sound of his neck cracking as he stretched it, and Lily’s jaw dropped wide open.
“That sounded like it hurt,” she commented discreetly, hoping he wouldn’t take it the wrong way.
He smiled at her, glasses almost slipping off his nose now, rather than tangled in his messy hair. Shaking his head, he said “I always do it to wake myself up, it feels rather good actually.” The bloke proceeded to crack each one of his knuckles, and then his wrist. Lily grimaced at the noise, but couldn’t help herself from laughing. She figured she should probably apologize to him for falling asleep on him, even though she didn’t know how she ended up on his shoulder.
“I’m Lily, by the way. Sorry I fell asleep on you. I’ve been working on an article and my brain genuinely felt like it might have melted if I hadn’t taken a break.”
“No worries Lily, it’s lovely to meet you,” he stuck out his hand, “Potter. James Potter.”
“Bond-like, are we?” Lily took his hand and gave him a firm handshake, trying to put on as serious of a face as she could in order to mirror his own expression.
“Of course, milady Evans. What takes you to London this fine weekend?”
“Why Mr. Potter, I’m heading back to work. I visited my mum in Edinburgh, and I’ve got a roommate and a flat and a job to get back to tomorrow.”
“Is that so?” James flashed a smirk that would have brought her to her knees if she hadn’t already been sitting down. “Well Evans, I’ve just done the same, except that I visited my mum and dad in Newcastle, and am heading back to the flat I share with my brother and our friends, and a job as well.”
Lily giggled, of all things, and looked down to realize that their hands were still intertwined from when he had reached out to shake them. She dropped it before she could get too flustered, and tried not to notice the disappointed look on James’ face.
“Right then, Potter, where do you work? I’d bet it’s somewhere posh, with the clothing you’re wearing and those sheets you were typing away on.”
Clearly surprised she had noticed, James’ quick reaction gave away that she seemed to have gotten everything right.
“Stalking me already Evans? And then falling asleep on me? Have you got some sort of ploy going on here, an evil scheme or whatnot?”
“Oh of course, I’m a journalist for The Daily Prophet, you see, and you’re the subject of my next story. James Potter: The Posh Bloke with Messy Hair and Unfinished Work.”
James let out a loud laugh at that, startling the other people in the full cabin. They all seemed to glare at him, despite his laugh being perfectly beautiful in her opinion. He raised a thick eyebrow, questioning her with just that one expression.
“Alright, well you’re not the subject of my next article Potter, sorry to disappoint. But I do really work for The Daily Prophet, and I’m afraid I’m the one with unfinished work seeing as my article’s barely hit a page yet.”
“And you’re sure it can’t be about me? My messy hair just won’t do for The Prophet?”
“Afraid not, sorry, unless you’ve got a secret as to how you manage to keep it that messy. You’ve run your hands through it more than I can count in just the time we’ve been talking, and it’s not shown a single sign of being tamed.”
“Well Evans, I suppose I’ll let you in on a secret then.” He leaned in close to her, his lips almost brushing her ear as his breath made her shudder. “My dad’s actually the creator of Sleakeazy’s Hair Products, and I refuse to use it out of principle.”
Lily’s head snapped around so quickly it nearly gave her whiplash. She looked at James with an incredulous look on her face – there was no way he was telling the truth. But his face looked so earnest, completely devoid of his teasing demeanor, and Lily ended up just staring at him in bafflement. He snickered as she continued to stare him down, and his hands went right back up to muss up his hair.
“Yeah, I know. My brother ended up with the good hair genes, considering Sleakeazy’s has never really been able to do much for me anyways. Well, he’s not really my brother, we took him in after he ran away from his shitty family, but he’s my brother in everything but blood.”
James seemed like he was about to continue rambling, almost like his mouth was moving quicker than his brain. Lily reached out to put her hand on his wrist, but whether she did it to calm him down or for her own benefit, she didn’t quite know.
“That’s really sweet of you and your family, James,” she gave him a small smile, “You’re clearly of the good sort. Maybe I will write my article about you after all. James Potter: A Bloke with Messy Hair and a Penchant for Being a Good Person.”
“All that from a bit of rambling, eh, Evans?” He was evidently smug, happy with the perception he’d given of himself. Something about his smirk made Lily want to wipe it clean off his face with a kiss, but it was far too early and far too public of an area to do that. Instead, she humored him with a laugh, and pulled her laptop out of her bag.
Opening a new document, she enlarged the font into the awful old-Gothic newspaper style that came preloaded, and wrote up all the silly titles she’d come up with today. James reached for it slowly, wordlessly asking permission to take her laptop. She nodded and passed it to him, curious to see what he’d possibly type. He deleted all the words she’d put in, and changed the font to fucking Lobster, of all things, and then turned the laptop away from her. James seemed to be taking his time to think about what he was about to type, mussing up his hair yet again. After a minute or so of anticipation, he turned the laptop back to her, and it read: “James Potter: A Bloke with Messy Hair Who’d Like to Take One Lily Evans on a Date.”
Lily gave him what might have been the goofiest grin of all time, snatched back her laptop, changed the font to a respectable Times, enlarged it, and wrote in “Yes” so that it would fill up the page. James smiled back at her with the same reckless abandon, and leaned over to hold her hand. And then the computer nearly slipped off her lap.
They both reached for it, knocking heads in the process, but managed to save it from a horrific death on the train (she was a journalist, she needed to make use of her sensationalizing skills sometimes), and they both started laughing. They kept going even as she quickly put her laptop back in its bag. The passengers around them were definitely staring at them with irritation now, but that meant nothing to her if it meant seeing James’ smile. She leaned back into him and grabbed his hand to hold it properly this time, looking up at him like she could ravish him right there. He stared back at her with the same dark look in her eyes, and kissed her forehead and her nose.
God, this boy and his ability to make her giggle. She whispered, “If you’d like to kiss me, you can just do it, y’know?”
He leaned in for a chaste kiss, “Right, but if I kissed you like I wanted to right now, we’d probably get a complaint for public indecency. Besides, it’s just another half hour to London, and my flat’s not too far from the station.” And then he winked at her. Lily gaped at him with an open mouth, and James pushed it back closed after a beat, saying “Don’t catch any flies in there, love.” Truly, James Potter was an enigma she could write an article on.
“Well, I suppose I’ll get back to writing my article then. It seems I might be busy after we get off this train.”
James stared her down as she pulled her laptop back out of its back, tied up her hair, and for extra flair, picked his glasses off his head and put them on.
“Fuck, nevermind, you’re blind as a bat, Potter,” Lily blinked furiously, and shoved them back onto his face. James ruffled his hair (of course he did), and reopened his own work. Before he started working though, he reached over and pulled her closer to him, so much so that she was nearly on his lap, and then took his arm right back away once she was squished into him. Embracing the position, Lily opened a new document, abandoning the pages she had previously written, deciding that her next article would just have to be about something more lighthearted than the current foreign affairs of the UK government; her boss Minerva could probably appreciate some good news anyway. Pulling up the notes of an old interview she had done. Finally finding a rhythm as she typed away, Lily was startled by the “London, next stop!” that blared over the train’s PA system. She glanced over at James, who seemed just as rattled, and they both put their things away in unison. As everyone else on the trains stood from their seats to take their luggage, James immediately bumped his head as he got up.
“Bloody hell, these have no right being so low,” He grumbled as he stretched out and reached for his duffel.
“Sure you won’t need help with your bag this time, Potter?” Lily felt the need to tease him, just to humble him with her first impression of him from when he boarded the train. As if to prove a point, James swiped her bag off the overhead carry bin as well, and held on to both of them as the cabin started to clear out. Lily did a final check of their seats, and lightly jogged to follow him out.
“Well Potter, I recall you saying your flat wasn’t too far from the station. Are you planning on making good on that?”
“Of course Evans, what kind of man do you take me for? I’ll have you know I don’t put out on the first date though, I’ll be making you food since my flat’s got a stellar kitchen.” She raised an eyebrow at him, willing him to continue, because she wanted to know what he could possibly be making for her. “My mum’s aloo tikki recipe, I think you’ll like it.”
“This feels like a dig at me for being half-Irish, but I never mentioned that, so I’ll accept it. I look forward to seeing your cooking skills since you’ve got the sort of hair that would catch on fire in a kitchen.”
James gave her that stunning smile again, and grabbed her hand as they walked out of the station, and on the way to his flat. Lily had a good feeling about this bloke with messy hair and enough charm to create a whole new world.
#lily evans#jily#marauders#userkay#kay writes#my writing#lily evans potter#james potter x lily evans#james potter#jple#flowerpott#marauders era#modern marauders#hp#harry potter#jily fanfiction#marauders fanfiction
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The Terrible Crow
All your life you desired recognition from your father, well you got it! But not from your bio dad, things only grow worse from there. For the Bats, not for you.
All your life you have longed for one thing, you’re Father’s recognition. At first it was simple things, like getting good grades, school awards. Anything for him to tell you how good of a job you’re doing. When he brought in Dick that changed, the escalation was quick. If he could be Robin, if he could fight with your Father why couldn’t you? Eventually after years of begging he agreed, then not even a week later he took in Jason and he became the new Robin. Your Father told you it was because he was older then you, already making it safer for him to go then you. When you brought up the fact that you’re the same age as Dick when he started, your father countered that Dick already had years more training with his parents than you.
After that you reluctantly didn’t argue, scared of seeming like nothing more than a spoiled kid. Jason in you began training together, although the two of you grew a bond it never felt right. Everyone called you close and although you liked him a part of you was resentful. You’re Father was always tougher on your training then Dick or Jason, always finding a flaw no matter how long you practice. In a way it helped you perfect your skills to the last detail. But he never told you “good job” not like Dick or Jason, it was always moving right on to the next thing. After Jason’s death the training got worse, he was somehow harder and stricter than before. You went to bed sore with aching bones and bruises from training, if you went to bed at all that is. Sometimes your sleep schedule was what was being trained, he would make you stay up for days at I time, rarely doing anything more than a nap. He told you this was similar to the training he went through, that it would make you stronger.
You never got the chance to prove it though, not even a half a year since Jason died a new boy was brought in. Tim’s the same age as you, highly intelligent and good at stealth but completely untrained. “SO WHY IS HE ROBIN!” You screeched at the man you call Father, Tim stands there glaring at you. He has a red mark on his cheek from where you slapped him when you were told he would be Robin. You were instantly yelled at and reprimanded by your Father for this, which started this argument in the first place. “I HAVE TRAINED FOR MOST OF MY LIFE FOR THIS, I HAVE DONE ALMOST EVERYTHING YOU WANTED ME TO! I FOLLOWED YOUR ORDERS I DEDICATED MY LIFE TO THIS” You scream at him, tears filling your eyes and falling down your cheeks. He just stares at you, expression blank and unchanging “what made you think I’d ever make you Robin?” Is all he says. Freezing you just stare at him crushed. “You’re dismissed” you feel like he spits it out, he doesn’t but it feels like he does “don’t ever train here again, nor even think about being a vigilante” you’ve never felt so much rage and sorrow before. You turn around to leave pushing Tim to the ground as you do “you’re grounded!” He calls out. Without even looking back you flip him off “fuck you Bruce!”.
After that things were never the same, you never wanted to try at anything anymore. What was the point in constantly studying if it meant nothing? So you did whatever you wanted, there were barely any consequences. Bruce didn’t give a shit about you, he never truly did. Alfred always sided with Bruce, sure he called him out when he was in the wrong, but that rarely changed anything with you. Dick was as absent in your life as ever. Finally you and Tim’s relationship was shit, it would never recover, at least you didn’t care if it did or not.
Eventually though you stumbled across a niche that peaked your interest. It started small, quick one minute videos about animal biology you finished the nearly 10 year old channel's entire library of content in 2 days. Then it evolved into animal psychology and finally to humans, what made them tick. It was fascinating every last detail interested you, from the mating habits of raccoons to the study that showed most humans could pick out snakes in extremely pixelated and blurry images. Even the more questionable experiments that would never pass today, like the wire and cloth mothers, and the monster study. Things that would have been difficult to prove or research if it wasn’t for the unethicalness of it all. Hell, even the bullshit study with gorillas learning sign language was interesting, even if the whole thing was completely pointless and awfully mismanaged. It was just so interesting to learn about.
Then you stumbled across it, a familiar name, Jonathan Crane, the Scarecrow. All his published studies were almost 2 decades old, but that didn’t stop how interesting they were. Both as a glimpse into the mind of a madman who long had his license revoked and as a study in how the mind understood fear in general. Sure you were made to memorize his habits, his usual schemes, hell you even helped reverse engineer and make a cure for several of his fear toxin strands. But you never learned about his studies, never learned about the person behind the mask. But now you wanted to, desperately, of course you couldn’t just go to Arkham. Bruce would learn about it and who knows what he would do once he learns of your little…. curiosity.
No, you didn’t want that, so you lied in wait for the perfect time. But while you did so you studied, falling back into old habits. Day and night you obsessively researched human psychology, several studies both bullshit and true. You memorized everything, dates, names, places, what effects they had, any changes or new revelations in the study, what they were studying and in some cases what they ended up actually studying. You even ended up dabbing deeper into chemistry. All of this to impress someone, but you enjoyed learning these things. All of this was fun, unlike dealing with Bruce.
Then finally the day came, Scarecrow broke out of Arkham. Using the skills Bruce ground into your brain you found him. It was pretty easy, you're shocked he didn’t find Scarecrow sooner. Of course you ended up captured, tied to a chair in one of his labs. Oh also a gun pointed at your head, neat! “What are you doing here?” Scarecrow says suspiciously, a wide grin forms on your face as you happily say “I want you to teach me!” The man just looked at you strangely. Then he laughed, “this isn’t a very funny joke kid” the man sneered at you. “But I’m not! I’ve read your work Mr. Crane! It’s absolutely fascinating! I want to learn more, especially about your newer unpublished stuff!” He just stares at you, “really?” He asks, pointing the gun down. Although he doesn’t look like he believes you, “then prove it” before you can even react the gun is back at your head and he shoots.
The bullet barely misses but you don’t move, don’t even flinch, you just smile. You know how manic you look, but you don’t care. Scarecrow just stares at you surprised, he completely lowered the gun and put it away. “Well..” he mumbles, “I guess I can give you a test” that made you feel nothing but pure glee.
The costume you were put in started out simple, a almost completely black suit with blue gloves and a mask vaguely resembling a plague doctor. You thought you looked like a rip off emperor's coven member but that’s not that important. As Crow as his apprentice you were first given grunt work, helping and leading his henchman in getting supplies for whatever project he was working on. That was when you weren’t doing homework, taking notes, organizing documents. The Bat’s were completely unaware of what you were doing, sure they knew you had something after school. The one time they asked you told them you got an internship. They didn’t even bother to verify if that was true or not. Alfred was the only one who even slightly cared and even then he was just proud that you finally found a calling away from the vigilante life. Boy was he only slightly correct.
Things started ramping up after you defeated Tim, Robin in combat. The pure smug joy you felt at that moment is indescribable. The rejected Robin, who's rusty, proving that they're stronger, faster, smarter, better than the current? You were so excited you almost went into hysterics, and the fear on his face as you brutally kicked his ass? Priceless! They didn’t even realize it was you, but Scarecrow did, he recognized how similar your fighting style are instantly. At first you were worried, scared even about what he’d do now that he knew. Truthfully he was suspicious at first, but once you told him your story, how you were rejected from being Robin in favor of the second and third. How cruel they were to you before and after, even said you would tell him the secret identities of the bat’s and everyone you know is affiliated with them. Both publicly and privately, although he rejected your offer he saw your desperation. How much you want, no needed to stay, to keep this. Scarecrow accepted your loyalty and at that moment you truly became Crow.
To commemorate this occasion you got an outfit change. It became more padded, the mask looking more like a helmet then anything, and boots that increase your height by several inches. You were also made to train in a different combat style with both the added height and change of vision it was a necessity. But also to help cover your tracks as Crow from the Bat’s. So you grow, you changed, you trained and trained and they never noticed. Not when you came back injured from work, with new bruises and scars. Not when you came home with gifts, or when you brought your assignments back with you. They were completely ignorant as Scarecrow, Jonathan Crane, he became your family, your father.
Eventually though Bruce got suspicious, he never figured out who you were, not until much later. But he realized you're doing something shady, the man never put in the effort to figure out what exactly. So he sent you off to a college far from the city, of course he let you pick the field you wanted. It wasn’t too hard to figure out what to do, psychology was already your passion after all and you were being trained by the best. The only issue was Crow, how to excuse there absence. So faking an extreme injury a week before you left easily fixed that. Afterwards you packed up and went to school, a school you would never return from, not to the manor at least.
There you continued your studies, your training in all forms and your contacts with Scarecrow. The only real difficult thing was not getting caught in your less ethical studies. You spent from the age of 18 to 24 studying as much as possible in your field getting both a bachelor’s and master’s. The plan was to go for a PHD too, but sadly things were interrupted and you quickly returned home. Your dad, Scarecrow was extremely injured during a fight and was in the hospital. Someone needed to step up, that person was you.
This time your outfit changed once more, it made you look even bigger and bulkier then you were. A cloak with a feathered collar, iron gloves with clawed ends, the faceless bird helmet looking even more imposing. Everything in your power to make you look as menacing as possible, large and imposing, a night to rival the knight. As you were making your return known you discovered something interesting, a new Robin, a baby brother. Dispute your issue with your family something about this was exciting. You felt so happy and you didn’t know why, but the fact he’s a Robin? Well, the kid needed to be taught a very important lesson before he learned it the hard way.
It wasn’t hard leading him to Wayne tower by himself. Kid had the skills but no discipline, reckless and willing to do anything to prove himself worthy. You can relate, which is way it has to be you who dose this. You approach the 10 year old boy from the shadows “you came alone hatchling?” You say in a soft voice. He jumps away and wipes his head around to face you eyes wide, he pulls out his sword and points it at you. “How-“ “a magician never reveals there secrets” you say playfully “now put the sword down baby bird” he doesn’t just glares at you. He then lunges forward aiming for your throat, but it wasn’t hard to grab the blade and rip it from his hand. He stares at you wide eyed as you throw it to the other side of the building, he quickly reorganize himself and throw a punch. But you dodge it, each kick and punch he sent was easily avoided.
As he moved to kick your head you grabbed his leg, and pulled him away. “You know” you begin walking to the edge tone not changing, “in nature Crows and Robins have an interest relationship. Crows are an omnivorous creature, they don’t just eat seeds and nuts like some people will have you believe. They’ve even been reported to peck out the eyes and tongues of lambs. Robins are no exception,” you hold him over the edge and watch as his eyes widen. He squirms and yells, “Crows will actually protect the nests of Robins, for a fee of course.” Batman should appear any minute now. “There young, they take and feast on the eggs and hatchlings. They basically farm them, it’s fascinating really. Crows are one of the smartest birds, about as intelligent as a 7 year old human. We’re watching the first signs of the evolution of a society!” You say almost giddy, “little mafias! It’s adorable and fascinating!” “We’re are you going with this” you just stare down at him, your mask making it nothing more then a dark void. You can practically feel his presence close to you, “it’s simple really! I’ve never been payed my dues! And you’re just a hatchling that doesn’t know better” and you drop him.
Batman catches him of course, but by the time he does and gets back up the tower you’re already long gone.
——————
Sorry if it takes a while for me to post things! I haven’t been feeling great both physically and mentally lately.
#batfam x reader#platonic batfam#x gender neutral reader#x reader#neglected reader#crow reader#villain reader
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When they see that you've been Sh
Warning: Mention of blood and self h@rm/cvtt!ng
Characters: Gyeong seok, Jung bae, Jun ho, The Salesman, Sae byeok-
Pt1 | Pt2
Gyeong seok-
Since moving in with Gyeong seok life has gotten a bit tougher for you; having way more responsibilities than what you’re used to, especially now since you have a cute step daughter who you love with all your heart, but it was something completely new and you thought you were doing a bad job. So to relieve some of the worries you began to sh. The pain washed the worries away. Then one day when you were playing with Na-Yeon your sleeves went up a bit and she had notices come red marks on your skin.
“Mama what’s that?” she said pointing at your arms.
You put your hands behind your back
“It's nothing sweetheart I just got a little boo boo just dont tell daddy ok?”
She just nodded and continued to play with her toys.
The next day it was Gyeong seok’s turn to take Na-Yeon to school.
While he was in a small conversation with her a cat appeared in front of her and she began to pet it and said.
“Papa, Mama said to keep this a secret but imma tell you. She had red marks on her arms. It looked like a kitty gave her a boo boo.
After hearing those words Gyeong seok knew that something was wrong. After dropping his daughter off he ran home to see if what he thought was true.
You were cooking dinner and suddenly someone barged into the front door.
“Let me see your arms”
“Why do you need to see my arms”
“Just show them to me.” He said in a stern voice.
You had no other choice but to show him
“Why are you doing this!?”
“Well I thought you might not want to be with me anymore if I was a bad mother so to cope I began to do this” You said almost whispering
“Why would I ever leave you for that reason? I married you for a reason because you're perfect in my eyes. I'm also learning to be a father and loving husband everyday so don't think you're going through all of this alone.” He said as he held you in a long embrace.
You were in his arms crying like a baby
“I love you” He whispered in your ear
“I love you too”
Jung bae-
Although he’s always bubbly there's a serious side that would show at times and that time was now. He accidentally came into to the room as you were getting dressed and saw your bruised body
“Y/N! WHO HIT YOU”
You looked at him standing at the door and realized that you forgot to lock it. He came in and sat next to you as he asked to see the bruises on your body.
“I did this to myself” you looked down feeling ashamed of saying it out loud.
He looked at you the brave person he had met was now a shell of their former self
“I want to help you so please don't do this to yourself because when you hurt yourself you hurt me as well.
He then helped you finish getting dressed and soon made you dinner before you both cuddled to sleep.
Jun ho-
He knew something was wrong (he’s literally a cop) so when you started to wear long baggy shirts he had to find out what was going on.
So he asked you one day out of nowhere if you wanted to go on a vacation. He never told you where but he did say it would be a surprise. So after the long car ride you woke to the smell of the ocean and the sun beaming on you. You used to love the beach but now It was your worst fear.
He led you to the beach house that his family owned and after bringing all the louage in it was finally time to head to the beach. As he was waiting for you to come out of the bathroom he wondered if he was maybe overthinking things. When he heard the door creak you still had a baggy shirt over your bathing suit.
“Aren't you going to go into the water?”
“Well um maybe not this time.” you said
“But you love going into the beach just take you have your bathing suit under right so just take it off”
As he was playfully lifting up your shirt he saw multiple cuts on from your stomach to your chest. You quickly pulled it down and just looked down.
“Is that the reason why you didn't want to go in… Babe, why didn't you tell me sooner.”
“Well…. because you have work and you seem to be busy”
“But I always have time for you. You mean everything to me and I want you to rely on me.”
“How about we get those bandaged up and later we can go out and have a dinner date near the beach.” He said wanting to make it up to you.
“I’d love that” You said giving him a kiss”
The Salesman-
He loves to see the blood of his enemies fall, but not you he cares so much for you. He noticed that there would be blood drops on the bathroom floor which made him install hidden cameras in the house. When he would go back to check them he would see you enter the bathroom and come out after a few minutes with bandages all over your legs and arms.
So on the day’s that you're not home he looks all over the house finding all the hidden blades and would slowly start removing them one by one until there was none. He even removed anything else that could be used. He even came home sooner so he could keep you company in the evening.
“What are you doing so early here”
“I just wanted to spend more time with you honey~”
Without you realizing it you had stopped and it was now a thing of the past.
Sae byeok-
She took it the hardest. Having someone that she loved dearly being in pain hurt her so much.
When she first saw the cuts and scars on your body she was mad, not at you but at herself for not knowing sooner.
“I’m so sorry babe, how can I even call myself your girlfriend if I can't even protect you”
She kept apologizing non stop. You didn't want to see her like this. She was such a fearless woman and she was blaming herself for something that you did to yourself, it felt like a dagger to the heart.
You kneeled down and cupped her face with your hands
“Hey! Please don't blame yourself for this.”
After saying that you got up and went to your shared bedroom and grabbed all the blades and brought them to where she is and you just threw them straight into the trash can. I don't want you to suffer for something that I did so please stop apologizing.”
You then went down and kissed her forehead. “I promise I'll stop this…for you.”
Hear is pt2!!! =^▿^= If you have any other characters you guys want please suggest them!! :3
#x reader#one shot#angst#fanfic#fluff#gender neutral reader#squid game#squid game s2#sh cvt#self h@rm#cvtt!ng#$h tumblr#park gyeong seok#gyeong seok x reader#gyeong seok#squid game fandom#squid game fanfic#squid games#jung bae#jung bae x reader#jun ho#jun ho x reader#jun ho squid game#the salesman#salesman squid game#the recruiter#the salesman x you#squid game salesman#squid game recruiter#salesman x reader
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Gonna delete this later, but wanted to provide an update for the ~5 people that might read it.
I haven’t been active, and I’m sorry for that. I hit a rough patch with my mental health in December. I’ve been undergoing treatment and just generally trying to figure shit out. My seasonal job is down for a few months and I’ve been struggling to find full time work in my field since I graduated last summer.
I’m in my home town with my parents still and my one friend who’s still in the area is moving next month for a job. Because I’m out of work and generally introverted, I’m having a hard time being social and finding opportunities to meet new people.
So, generally, I haven’t been in the best of places recently. I’m going to keep working towards improving myself, my mental health, and my life. One of my first steps has been trying to be more productive with my free time. I’ve been trying to write more and have made it a goal to get around to writing a Luaisy one-shot I’ve been thinking about for months. I also want to interact more with all of you guys in the fandom! Hopefully, we get some info about the second movie soon 🤞
Finally, watercolor Luigi is almost complete (if it looks slightly different it’s because I started over. 🤣). I just need to add a few more details! Here’s the WIP!
Love y’all 💚
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!!!!
#i want to write this here… i am not a religious person… but after i had just moved and when i was depressed…which I was often then#less so these days…#i drove myself to get ice cream and i prayed along the way that i had made the right decision#to move out and start a new life and find this job#and i cried for a long while which i also seemed to do a lot then#and while i was driving back home i prayed… and i think i pray just in case someone is listening … just so they can’t say i never tried#at least someone might be listening to me#i asked god if they could show me a deer… which is a really stupid sign to ask for because i had never seen a deer close up#and i knew in my mind that i didn’t mean some vague outline of a deer on the horizon or some painting of a deer#and i don’t know why i asked for a deer at all#but i did and i had just gotten my license two months prior for this job… and i was driving on a street that was without anyone else…#which was really unusual for this tourist town in the summer but i was crying and driving and praying and it was dusk#and a deer wandered into the road…. just feet within me… and i wasn’t scared… i slowed down and I’m not sure how much time passed#but i cried and looked and wondered if i was so mentally ill i was hallucinating before the deer hobbled off to the field#and even if it’s stupid and highly conincidental… it made me feel better… and i think god is more of a whisper of hope that things will#change… and as the winter grows long… i am hungry for another sign that i am okay#i miss how simple life could be and I miss you
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sheet for kian
victor's sheet
#oc: kian micelli#ts4#I feel the need to bring out some backstory#Kian leaves his house early because he planned to start a career in a big city and he worked hard to make that happen.#He got a position where he may be promoted after getting a degree and achieving his dream job#but he didn't enjoy it as much as he was expecting which broke him#He returned home and soon discovered that he supposed to stay there#Victor however would work in his parents' business for the rest of his life but he found it difficult to adapt to adulthood#He dropped out of college moved out with his parents and is now attempting to figure out his future steps#and they first met at this point#Kian gave himself time to work with his parents all summer before beginning looking for a job#Victor wants to begin a new life.#Before Victor’s family lived there but after several problems that include his brother they left#and now that he’s returned rumors about his family keep being spread so he needs to find a strength#oc stuff#my sims
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You ever wake up from a dream so fucked that you have to sit there for 10 minutes after waking to rewrite the ending so that you can move on with your day or are you normal
#messages from knave#i keep having these ongoing dreams about an alternate reality version of my life#mainly about my parents#like right after i lost my job i had a dream that they'd moved to another state on a whim#and just told me to either upend my entire life to move to florida with them or figure it out#and i ended up moving into a much shittier apartment before realizing 'wait i have a whole house' and moving back into my own house in NJ#and then last night i dreamed I'd visited them and spent a day with my nephews then we all went to a wrestling match#and then after almost being run over by my dad cause he started driving while i was getting into the car#we go back to their house and i take a fat nap only to wake up in the dream and discover that I've disturbed this thumbelina sized toddler#that my mom jad apparentky adopted and then completely forgot about. and we wtruggled to getbit comfortable again on its little ved#then it escaped as toddlers do and i went through a comedy of errors trying to find it only to find it seemingly plastic and lifeless#only for it to start going through rapid metamorphosis into an adult and running around my parents house#my dad and i tried to stop it from growing up becuase every transformation opened up a new pocket dimension or something#then the dream changed into something else as my brain slowly booted back up from a migraine back into reality and i woke up#but the visage of a polly pocket sized toddler being left behind in my adult sized bed really shook me for some reason#it was so small and it was on a teeny pink pillow and it had a little purple teddy it kept dropping#but now I'm thinking of the logitstics of actually raising a child you could step on and squash by accident#that must be nerve wracking like how did thumbelina make it to adulthood without being confibed to a single room or even a single table#cause my first instinct is to build a diarama on a table for them and never let them leave until they're old enough to dodge
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no matter how much my life is improving, i still feel empty and alone
#i got a new job#i like it so far but i thought it would make me happier#it has a little bit i still just feel.. strange#like it isn’t enough#i’m lonely#it’s hard to make friends and i don’t know what to do anymore#i want a boyfriend#i just want someone who cares about me and accepts me#i miss freddy but he hasn’t talked to me in years#i miss the way he made me feel#i worry i’ll never have that again#its still hard to move on because i haven’t experienced anything since#i miss having friends#doing things#life is so lonely#i want to have fun#i want to go out a d have dinner or a picnic avd play in the grass and swing on swing sets#but my life is passing by and i’m still alone#and i’m sad#no matter how much money i make or clothes i buy make me feel better#i just feel worse#because it’s not meaningful#i just want to find something that gives my life meaning#i want love#i want to be in love#but i am starting to wonder if im just unlovable#anyways i’m just yapping cause i have no one to talk to
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Have to document every time I see a new, good doctor I think - saw the neurologist today and he was everything I could've hoped for. Read my whole history going back 5 years, very professionally hinted that my previous neurologist was full of shit (he was but I didn't realize that was evident from just the notes), listened to my concerns and changed+added to his plan based on what I said, and laid out a diagnostic trail that explicitly ended in Mayo clinic if he isn't able to find answers. He took five minutes aside just to tell me that he's not happy with bucket diagnoses or jumping to psychosomatic explanations (roasting my previous neurologist who in his opinion missed a viral meningitis diagnosis in favor of psychogenic seizures). I think he's a little bit more into diagnostics than I am - I don't usually go for diagnostics unless they're going to change the treatment plan, but also at this point I think a firm diagnosis would be nice for planning and prognosis even if day to day management doesn't change.
It's also taking a minute to adjust. I was living my life with the assumption that at any time, without really realizing it, I could pass a threshold of stress that would cause me to seize until I couldn't talk or walk again. Bc I didn't think I was exceptionally stressed at the time, so obviously my threshold was fairly low and I wouldn't notice before it was too late. Having a different doctor review the results and tell me (without me bringing it up) that I likely had viral meningitis instead...idk. it just paints a very different clinical picture. Does make me wonder what's up with the occasional feelings I've gotten that I've categorized as pre-ictal (bc it feels the same as when i had those seizures). Probably won't change my response (cease stressful activity and take gabapentin or lorazepam) but interesting nonetheless.
#i will continue to use my stress barometer of if I'm waking up in the middle of the night screaming then something needs to change#idk i think i was fairly stressed at the time#i was facing down moving several hundred miles with a partner who had put zero effort into getting a job in the new locale#or anything else related to moving#but was also insisting that we move to the city and state of her choice instead of my suggestion of cheaper areas#or at very least finding a job she wanted and moving to that#but that would've required her to lift a fuckin finger#but is that actually enough stress to be worth that many seizures?#also i feel like I'm getting more bitter about my ex the farther away i get from her#it's hard to remember why i stayed and easier and easier to remember reasons i should've never started the relationship in the first place#and I'm still sad that i lost a good friend in the process of leaving her bc i feel like if we could talk about it she would be on my side#but i didn't reach out bc that's creepy and she blocked me on everything.#idk. just kinda feel like i wasted five years of my life trying to make someone i loved happy who could never be happy#and who just hurt me instead.
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Maybe I'm just cursed 🤪
#trigger warning for everything that follows in these tags btw#i am in need of some venting into the void#so im gonna vent#so uh#im almost out of time to find a new job before i have to leave my flat and move back with my parents#in the past 27 days ive filled in 189 job applications#6 of those led to interviews#so far 5 of those have been rejections#i even started looking at jobs that paid way less than i can feasibly live on just so i could at least cover rent and stay here but no luck#anyway thats already sucky#and then ive had to go off my adhd meds because of continuous and annoying fuck ups with my drs and im hesitant to work to fix it cause#might be moving counties anyway lol#my depression is the worst its ever been in about two years i struggle to want to exist day in and day out and#this morning i found out my dog - my baby who i dont live with because i moved cities - he lives with my parents#we found out he has an agressive cancer - and i have to now make choices i dont feel ready to make#and im just#do you ever feel like youre already one the ground but life wont stop kicking you#and i feel#so lonely#my friends are doing everything right my cousin who i live with is always checking in on me and i am still#convincing myself i am being a burden i am the problem i#my whole life is collapsing and i#even writing this all out in tags my brain is yelling at me for being an 'attention seeker' or smth and idk#i just wanna#idk#its complicated ig#im fighting#i am fighting so hard#i just want ppl to know im doing my best thats all#anyone who read all of this - hi - i hope youre having a beautiful day. its all going to be okay in the end 💛
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.
#y'all my anxiety has me spiraling as of late because it just feels like my whole life is falling apart at this point#i got fired from my job a couple of months ago and i've been scrambling to try and find a new one#i work part time at a store i really love but it pays shit#and i've had all of these interviews and no one wants to hire me and i just feel unhireable at this point and it's hard not to despair#and on top of that i'm struggling with my self esteem again#i know i'm not ugly per se but i'm struggling with feeling confident in the way i look as a big girl#and all of my old insecurities are rearing their ugly heads and i want to cry just thinking about it#and i feel like such a failure right now even though i know that life has its ups and downs but my stupid brain just won't chill#and i don't really have any friends in the area because they all either moved away or didn't live here to begin with#and i'm tired of living at home because of my stupid student loans and not being able to afford to live on my own#i have one person i hang out with and we just met and i don't want to scare them off because they're a great friend and person#and i just feel like i'm never going to meet anybody who's going to love me the way i want to be loved because of my looks#also because it's me. and i feel like i'm so flawed as a person that no one will ever fall in love with me#and i've just been feeling really alone lately and i'm trying to do things to make me feel better but it's just so HARD right now#and i love writing because it gives me a chance to explore some of my feelings and it's something i genuinely love to do#and i'm sitting here waiting for the day things start to get better. and i know we all joke and i'm gonna sounds so dumb for saying this#but i feel like i was meant to be famous? or do something great idk and it's something everyone has always told me#and idk if my feelings of inadequacy are because of that or what but i'm scared that my life is going to mean nothing in the end#anyway this was a lot and you can pretend like you didn't read it. i just wanted to write some of my feelings down
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like idek what to do about my life atp
i literally am trying and nothing works. nothings working. but if i give up ill be even more miserable.
#cant find a different job bc i hate my current one which also has an end date soon#cant make new friends but signed up to volunteer but that shit is weeks away also working remotely has decimated my social skills#feel annoyed and irritated with my current friends bc ngl they arent very good at comforting or being present with people#want to move states by years end but it genuinely just doesnt seem possible#tried getting a partner early in the year and just gave up bc honestly i hate myself so how can i even enter a rs#worked out to lose weight and just gained it because i cant fucking keep up a workout schedule to save my life BECAUSE#I HAVE A FULL TIME JOB AND AM TIRED#AND DONT EVEN GET ME STARTED. ON THE POLITICAL STATE OF THE WORLD.#LIKE THIS YEAR HAS BEEN FUCKING ASS ? AND ITS LIKE NOW IM BURNTOUT FROM TRYING ?#AND ITS MY FIRST YR POST GRADUATION SO ITS LIKE#WOW THIS IS JUST WHAT LIFE IS LIKE#AHAHAHAHAHHA JUST. BEING UP ON COPIUM PRETENDING THINGS WILL BE BETTER
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Hug
Hug
#I feel like every time I pull myself back together in like a week or two I just fall apart again#and I don’t really want to do anything drastic but at the same time my little fix-it’s just feel like bandaids#like step one is going back to therapy for sure it is not uprooting my life and moving#but at the same time like until I can get that I’m a bit worried#like now I’m wondering if I really should work on finding a new job#like idk I don’t want to do anything big and drastic I just want to ride it out#but that hasn’t been working#like clearly the shit I’ve been doing isn’t working so maybe I do need to start taking more drastic measures like finding a new job#you know it was gonna be like okay let’s start with therapy#but that was like a week ago I only started looking for therapists like yesterday#on the one hand I’m like okay we need to start small and start with maybe therapy and see how that does before we make any bigger decisions#but then it’s like how many shitty days at work is too many#idk#punk gets mail#personal
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anyways summer is always such a time of rebirth and pain but growth and I've never had a painful summer that didn't propel me forward in some way shape or form. so it will all be fine!!!
#last summer was probably my most normal in a while.#2018 moving out from my dad finally. 2019.. normal actually. 2020 covid and i felt numb. but started to teach 2021 sooo much I can't even#describe byt the quote 'juoy is coming and i think im gonna save my life a little but' or wtvr it was was theme of the summer.#2022. abt to go to taiwan. 2023. normal except i had to get a new car and realize how bad i am at maintaining my life#2024. actively trying to find a partner and a job i truly deserve#nit the mediocre i think i deserve#godddd#wait no 2019 was the last summer i cosplayed which is actually significant in a lot of ways i dont even know where to begin
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Okay crew. I have three hours to get out of my apartment and get going to my parents' house. I don't have to pack my mattress or get rid of my furniture anymore because my strong af girlfriend helped me take care of it. I just have to fit what I can into my van (not a lot) and abandon the rest. Then drive four hours. Wish me luck. I'll need it.
#when i wrote this in my head it konda sounds like a general inspiring his troops#except im both the general and the troops#oh god i have three hours to condense my life into my minivan#i took 70mg of vyvanse and i feel great. i think im gonna take 30 mg more just because i have to get rid of it#see i stole the 30mg from my brother and im about to go see him. i dont want him searching my shit and finding his own meds#its okay he only takes these meds while hes in school. and i stole them over winter break#please only take medicine that is your own. dont fuck with prescriptions that belong to other people. do as i say not as i do#holy shit im not okay#i went to my fav local coffee shop today for the last time and started tearing up while i was there#im gonna miss this place#im moving across the country to live with my sibling#and honestly i dont think its gonna be my forever home. i think this is just a much-needed adventure and change of pace#i can see myself living in this city for years and years. but im still leaving#i know i need to leave. i need to live with someone. be with family. i need to get out of my shit job. i need a new start#so itll be worth it. but i think ill probably come back here eventually. idk. but for now im leaving. i need to go#i need to go in three fucking hours
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