#tism creature moment

[amourcherie606]

OH OLD MYHIRU DOODLES I NEVER POSTED chat i swear im gonna do mythiru week but itll prolly be after finals

[foldedchip]

what should I do for the background? I’d like to give this some more narrative

[damiianismwayne]

TBH DAMIAN WAYNE TBH DAMIAN WAYNE TBH DAMIAN WAYNE TBH DAMIA

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

So, my comfort hobby is watching people on YouTube react to the Owl House- it's very fun, and I enjoy it quite a bit.

Often though, when Stranger Tides and Hunting Palisman come up, they will make comments about how strange and unsuited Hunter's voice is for his ominous character/persona. And half of me, the reasonable half goes:

"well, that's for a reason, it's because Hunter doesn't fit the persona of the Golden Guard- he's a highly trained soldier but still a kid, he's a teenager in a position of power, of course his voice cracks and isn't as ominous that's the point, the point is he's been given expectations and power he can never live up the point is that his voice shouldn't match-"

But the goblin part of me that first heard Hunter's voice and went absolutely feral, goes:

"Hunter voice good. What are you talking about. Zeno Robinson is a god and his voice is perfect. "unfortunately, you won't have the chance" Hunter voice incredible. *Unintelligible screaming* Hunter voice incredible. I want to devour the way he says words help. "Oh, you just pull that chord above your head" JSJUSHDJRND His voice leaves me in absolute shambles. Hunter voice good. Zeno Robinson did the world more of a favour than every step taken by every great man. His voice tastes like honey and morning dew and a frenzied thunderstorm crackling on your tongue. What the HECK are you talking about."

[reallyunluckyrunaway]

[feelingsshmeelings]

Recently watched inside out 2 and I'm not even gonna lie, I left that theater with tears in my eyes and the FATTEST crush on Anxiety. I can't help it okay I love me some crinkly girl failure creature 😔

Anxiety x Reader: relationship headcanons

INCLUDES: GN! Reader, Fellow Emotion! Reader, fluff, some down bad behavior on Anxiety's part, very light angst, she/they pronouns for Anxiety

📋 It probably takes a while for her to settle into the relationship. Not to say that she dislikes being with you (of course not!!), but she's anxious. Like that's literally their whole thing. They have a hard time believing that you're actually... yknow, WITH THEM. Like, WILLINGLY.

📋 Eventually though, once you've given her plenty of reassurance, she'll start easing into the relationship

📋 Literally such a planner!! You can bet they've got a whole notebook dedicated to your relationship. Possible date ideas, things you like, things you dislike, important couple milestones to look forward to, etc. She's managing both of your calenders while ALSO crafting a detailed step-by-step plan of the next few years of your future together

📋 Anxiety is definitely the type to ramble— not just about they're job of looking after Riley but also about pretty much everything else. This one's a yapper, what can I say

📋 It's probably an insecurity of hers (she fears sometimes that her constant chatting may come off as annoying), but if you take the time to actually listen to what she has to say? Ask questions?? Offer your own insight???

📋 One word: marriage

📋 It's pretty much canon that she's prone to nervous breakdowns and insomnia. You should like... help her with that 👀. Guide her towards her massage chair when she needs it (or even better: offer a massage yourself). Cuddle with them in their bed, or yours. Talk them through their thoughts. Whatever works for the both of you

📋 I see Anxiety as being on the spectrum (ngl I feel like most of the emotions got that tism in them). That being said, physical touch is... well, they're not ADVERSE to it exactly, but it's probably not something they partake in often. Like it's not something she'll initiate, if that makes sense?? She's just very conscious of everyone else's personal space and would hate to overstep any boundaries

📋 THAT BEING SAID... Please hold her hand every now and then. Maybe just slide your hand into theirs while the two of you are standing side-by-side at the control panel, or give hers a small squeeze whenever she starts spiraling. She finds it grounding

📋 (they're bright red the whole time, constantly asking if you're really okay with it or if her palms are clammy or if your comfortable in the position or if—)

📋 PETNAMESSS!!!! Her go-to for you is "sweetie", or "love" if they're feeling particularly bold

📋 Will literally melt into a puddle at whatever nickname you choose to give them tho. Like you could give them the cheesiest petname on the planet and they'd still go all squiggly mouthed and flapping their hands

📋 Likes to take initiative in most things, INCLUDING your relationship, so don't be surprised if she's the one taking charge while putting together dates or while you two are at work in Riley's mind. Sometimes they can be a bit overbearing, but just have a sit down with her, let her know how you feel, and she'll gladly step down and let you get shit done

📋 COM👏MU👏NI👏CA👏TION!! VERY IMPORTANT TO HER!!!! Like I said before, they overthink a lot, so it definitely helps if you're honest and open about how you feel

📋 Working inside the mind of a teenage girl can be pretty stressful, so being able to wind down with you at the end of the day is definitely something Anxiety looks forward to

📋 Being able to ramble with you and get their thoughts off their chest is something they love, yes, but they also enjoy the moments of quiet you two share. You could be sitting at the same table, maybe you're reading a book or drawing, meanwhile she's jotting down a new workout regimen for the upcoming hockey season. Or maybe you're having a shared cup of cocoa while admiring the view from headquarters. Or maybe you're playing with their hair while they lay their head on your lap...

📋 She enjoys being able to simply exist with you. No thoughts about the future, no worries about what's yet to come. Just you and them in your own peaceful little bubble 🧡

I LOVE HER SO MUCH YOU DONT EVEN KNOW AJSJSKAKAKA!! Definitely planning on writing more for her soon! The other emotions too (feel free to send in an ask guysss I want ideas so bad 👀👉👈)

[versipellesh]

whistle in the dark || b. mears.

series concept drabble

summary: nature always has a way seeking to balance herself out, when a vampiric outbreak clouds a small town she sends a fur covered blessing

note: so at the moment this is stand alone and just a need for me to get concept out of my head,, im a big all things werewolf (it's my tism interest) but a ben mears x werewolf!reader fic // i wrote this to blood upon the snow by hozier because it's a vibe. also no beta reader, i just went apeshit with this

word count: 1278

The unsteady creak of the old stairs of the house echoed in the unfinished basement. Ben’s footsteps were a bit unsteady, the eerily silence that had been turned into the sound of flesh being torn into filled the cellar as he continued downwards. He had left Mark at the top of the stairs, the upper part of the house had been torn to hell and back. It was clear a struggle had taken place, blood spattering floors and walls was the first tell to them that they had gotten to you. But the sudden chunks or patches of what looked like skin coated in a slimy substance paired with claw marks that almost looked like a bear that followed a trail of blood and wet epidermis painted a far more concerning picture.

The flashlight in his hand shook slightly, the faded light barely illuminating the basement that’s only other source of light was from the small basement windows. Golden hues had been slipping in casting long shadows over the walls and shelving. There wasn’t much that seemed to be stored away, boxes that hadn’t been touched in sometime that were left to be claimed to be dust of time. He had been down here once with you when he had stopped by, it was far more organized then. Whatever struggle had occurred upstairs looked like it had gotten worse down in the cold basement. Boxes were strewn and memories scattered about, blood painting sections and metal shelves bent and snapped in ways they should have been.

Ben almost stumbled on the last step, his boot slipping on a particular slick part. It was a mixture of blood, membrane and skin like something had almost shed. “Fuck.” Was the only word that had left his lips the moment he almost ate it, his free hand reaching out to steady on the railing but was only met with the sticky residue of blood. His hand recoiled, blue eyes glancing at the dark red stain on his skin. He could feel the bile raise in the back of his throat but he pushed it down. He haphazardly wiped it on his jeans as he did his best to step out of the bio-hazard of a mess at the bottom of the stairs.

His flashlight scanned the wide and mess torn space. The sounds had gotten louder now he was down there. He didn’t know exactly what it sounded like but there was that sickly sound of flesh being torn from thew. It did nothing to settle the pit in his stomach as the sounds of something growling and grunting followed the sounds of flesh being torn away for whatever had been the poor creature to be attacked. He swallowed quietly, almost jumping out of his skin when he heard Mark whisper yell down the stairs.

“Is she here?” The boy asked.

Ben’s blue eyes flickered to the basement then back up the stairs at Mark. He wasn’t sure what to say, he knew he couldn’t lie to the boy. He was smart and probably would have figured it out if he had said no.

“I’m not sure. Just stay up there.” Ben told him. He watched as the boy nodded, pushing his glasses up his face as Mark settled to sit at the top of the stairs.

Ben re-centered himself as he flicked the flashlight around. He felt a sense of dread boil in his system as he made his way through the carnage that covered the basement. He wasn’t sure if it was the anxiety that you weren’t alive and one of those bastards had gotten to you but it felt different. Like staring into the unknown and seeing the void blink back at you. The writer moved quietly through the broken and shoved over shelves, the warm light of the flashlight flickering over the steel bars of the shelves. He could see bits of skin caught on areas, blood was painted about like some gothic picture and then the clothing. He had stopped halfway when he had caught sight of that flannel shirt that he had often seen you wear over thinner t-shirts.

It was tattered and blood soaked, some of the fleshy membrane clung to it. The bloody slim touched his skin and he stumbled back. It was still warm yet so foreign. In the process of stumbling back, his long legs tripped over one of the toppled shelves and his world was suddenly tipping to the side. He didn’t have much time to brace himself as he hit the cold concrete floor. He cracked his head against it and the world blurred for a moment. Everything became dizzy for a moment as pain flooded his body. Ben let out a groan as he slowly flipped himself around. His large hand met the warm substance. It took a brief moment for him to realize what it was, the tangy smell of blood assaulting his senses.

A primal fear flooded his body as he began to shake. The sounds of something eating were crystal clear now and so were those animal-like noises. As his vision focused again, what he had been expecting was to see your lifeless corpse being drained of your blood, blank eyes staring back at him and that the blood he had touched was yours. But it wasn’t, it wasn’t even close to what he had been thinking to see.

There was a body, it was definitely someone from the Lot that had turned. Pale skin that was stained with crimson and bloodshot eyes wide in horror. Their chest cavity had been torn straight through and their head was barely attached at the spine. It was the thing that was hunched over the body that he wasn’t sure what he was looking at. He couldn’t call it human, elongated limbs that ended in long paws and a wiry body as a blood streaked maw ripped into the chest of the vampire. The fur was the color of your hair, most of it was semi long until it got to the head of the beast where it came down in drapes covering half lidded eyes as the beast partook in its kill. A short tail long loosely as the beast was crouched, a large human yet canine-like paw held the body down as it ripped at the viscera of the corpse.

The flashlight had fallen out of his hand and it had seemingly been knocked loose somewhere as it was off before it had started flickering. The dim light caught the eyes of the beast, those eyes that were all to human like but also animal at once widened and the beast stopped. Ben’s icy hues caught the beast's stuffy moment of staring each other down filled the room. The beast made a low growl as it lifted its maw, slick with blood and meat as it stood up. It was almost the size of a horse, muscles ripping and the remains of clothing still clung to its form. The only indication that it was you was that charm that you always wore around your necklace, a worn bronze pendant that now seemed to be more a collar than a necklace.

It was at that moment the chilling realization hit Ben. If vampires existed then surely other things had too, it was hard to swallow the first truth but it was another to realize that what he was seeing in front of him was another creature of legend.

A werewolf.

All he seemed to understand was two things, that it was you and that what you were seemed to be something natural that could fend off a bloodsucker.

tags: @delopsia @lewmagoo @rhettmotel

[eldritch-spouse]

Anon who asked for an S/O who mimics Breg's chirping is backkkk

Surrounding vocalizations... again. I have vocal stims that vary, but often sounds like a creature vocalizing. Chirps, trills, whines. Depends on my mood. (Thanks tism)

How would Breg react to an S/O who did that almost subconsciously based on their mood? I can imagine him hearing it, being confused briefly, before 'interpreting' the sounds and trying to help out lmao

[Anon, I don't have the tism (that I know of, at least) and I constantly pop my lips, click my tongue and whistle when I'm comfortable. 🤝]

Breg himself has many involuntary vocalizations, as you probably took notice of already. In moments of great focus, you might still hear the ghost of a trill or growl coming from him, and unlike many other monsters, Breg doesn't try to hide his other impulse vocalizations for the sake of acting ""normal"" like plenty of societies demand monsters do.

When he hears you doing your own chirps and clicks, he doesn't actually think too much about it. It's normal to him, he just didn't know humans did it too! That's awesome, maybe you and him are not so different. That idea kind of falters when he makes a reply noise at you and you don't immediately return it. A bit odd, maybe you don't respond to him because your brain doesn't recognize him as kin, and that saddens Breg a little.

Eitherway, breeder vocalizations are very pitch and rhythm sensitive, so Breg can interpret your noises as a plethora of different things. Sometimes it's just a "Hey." or "I'm satisfied."/"I see you.", other times it can be "I have located prey." and that one has him rushing to your side.

Whining is almost never a content noise for breeders, so he's hovering around you trying to understand what the source of the discomfort is. There's a chance he'll start body checking you for wounds, before finally giving up and asking you, feeling like he failed as a partner for not immediately noticing.

[liffy-feelin-jiffy]

S5 Headcanons Part 2!

Also SkullAmiGorai mention hehehoohoo

Mask

Real name is Jacklyn, but they typically go by Jack

Got the ‘tism

Half sharkling. Bro doesn’t have a tail, but he’s got some fins peaking out behind his back and some razor sharp teeth. Munch munch munch. Their eyes are also a little weird looking too

Shady is his cousin btw. They keep in touch sometimes but they’re not that close

Omnigender, uses he/they/bro pronouns. They started using “bro” as a neopronoun for shits and giggles at one point until it kinda just became an actual neopronoun for him because they like it

Also Omnisexual and panromantic. Why is everyone so attractive???

Tall. Scrawny as hell. Eat a sandwich, bloke

Makes the most lewd jokes out of the group. Bro even grosses Aloha out sometimes-

Mask: “I need her to bend me over the stove and spank me with a spatula-“

Aloha: “WHAT HAPPENED TO HELLO????”

Very congested voice. That’s hay fever. He gets it from his father, who got it from his father, and so on

“Nice argument, unfortunately I am at your front door with a blunt object” — debating online about which character should be invited into smash bros

I know his bitch ass kins that motherfucker Sal from Sally Face

Favorite video game would have to be portal 2. He’d like the plot, the story, and bro would love Glad0s to pieces 10/10 villain, she’s a mood. They also like RPGs, plenty of which he’s download off of an itch.io knockoff

This fool STANKS. Like, bro smells like cheap cologne and 50 day old stale pizza. Take a bath

The rest of the S5 and Mask’s family have definitely tried to give him a bath before. They failed 😞 /j

Just kidding, Mask showers once for two whole days. Sometimes they’ll go for three days

Has multiple socials. Bro doesn’t post much other than some random funny videos they catch of the boys doing stupid shit and cackling at them when they get hurt in the most ridiculous ways

Is actually depressed. Bro was acting like an edgy teen back when they were 14, but as they got older they did actually start developing depression. Bro isn’t suicidal or anything, or at least they don’t actively seek to harm themselves, but bro has this kind of… Depressive symptom where they would just have a lack of care for if they like got killed all of a sudden, even almost hoping it would happen. Instead of being all mopey and sad and crying themselves to sleep at night, Mask is really just in a numb state. They just don’t care about anything. They still pull through because of all their family and friends, and bro knows that leaving those people in his life wouldn’t do any good.

Bro gained his depression from his mom suddenly passing away when he was 18. She died in a horrible car crash. They were even the first to find out because he accidentally stumbled across the scene. It wasn’t too far from where they lived. Thankfully, Mask is seeing a therapist, but he’s having trouble opening up still.

Acts like a cat. Loves to cuddle, really lazy with their movements and mannerisms, and love bites. Nibbles on your hand like a creature

Plays the chello. At first he started playing because he thought that the low pitch of the chords were edgy, lmao, but then the sound of it felt soothing and it ended up growing on him. Bro plays it whenever he’s stressed out over something or if he just needs a moment to clear his mind. It helps them think better, too. He’ll play for you if he feels like it or if you ask nicely, but he’s usually shy about it.

Crusty gamer, but they have a beautiful face. Aloha dramatically passed out when he saw Mask’s true face

Mask doesn’t really like to take his mask off in general. At first it was so bro could look scary and intimidating when bro was younger, but now it’s because they value their privacy. Plus, they find comfort in their anonymity. They typically keep it off when they’re at home or at a trusted friends house

Aloha’s octoling roommate, Lilith, creeped the shit of him when they first met, even though they were kinda similar in how they acted. Bro was just really off put by her gigantic size and build, and the fact that she was missing an eye and had previously been part of the Octarian army—as an army captain no less—oooh bro had the heebie jeebies! They actually ended up becoming friends after they just trauma dumped to each other one night during one of Aloha’s parties. There were tears and ugly sobs involved. Now? Don’t tell anyone, but Mask thinks she’s fine as hell (they like their women buff).

Seriously though, now Mask is practically head over heels for that woman. He never wants to admit it, and he gets all defensive when people bring it up, as it’s mostly because she’s afraid of finding out and potentially beating his ass over it, or just having to face the reality that she simply may not be interested in them. That alone was enough to leave an emotional bruise on em.

Hangs out with Bobble, even though her smile used to erk him to the end of the world. He also likes hanging out with Goggles, too. The both of them treat Mask nicely and bought him a game that he really wanted for their birthday, so now Mask feels like he’s indebted to them (that’s what he says, but bro just likes hanging out with them)

Real chill about it when Army came out as an octoling—he also then came out as a sharkling at the time, too. He was also the first to find out about Army having a crush on Goggles and he tried to hook ‘em up just for shits and giggles, and sort of to see what would happen. Bro did feel happy when they got together, but then they got flabbergasted when the two of them also got with Rider and Skull— “Wait, did I miss a few chapters? What the hell”

Skull

His real name is Sloan

Autism hiding up in here somewhere. Adhd, too

Also gay. Unlike Rider, he’s more open about it—or chill at least

He’s a kraken squid, one of the strongest creatures in the inkling and octoling genuses. Being a kraken squid not only gives him more animalistic traits in the way he acts, like being territorial and prone to snapping his teeth and growling, but he also has bones. Krakens are one of the only ones, besides leviathans and some sharklings, to have bones in the cephalopod class

That being said, he’s broken an arm at one point. He mentions it every so often like it was a fever dream and people look at him alarmingly because the way he broke his arm sounds absolutely agonizing

Besides the E-liter, he also likes using the krak on splat roller

Likes to wear goth punk style, either that or punk rock

Gives the most bombastic side eye

He says he tone deaf when he sings, but he can actually sing pretty good. It’s really soothing. He’s just really shy about his singing and uses it as an excuse not to sing. You gotta bully him into doing it (don’t do that tho, not nice) He can also rap pretty good, too. And he’s really good with the bass guitar and regular guitar

Has really beautiful tanned skin, because he stands out in the sun all day holding his e-liter in matches and he’s Scalican and knows Coralish (Splatoon pun of Mexican and Spanish) he’s got a bunch of tan lines, too

But what if he had a southern accent? 👀 (I WANNA BE A COWBOY BABYYYY)

He’s been wearing his skull bandana for the longest to hide his sharp ass teeth to try to avoid people from getting spooked of him. Well, the skull on his bandana didn’t really help all that much, but he actually kinda liked the style because he felt intimidating for another reason other his real teeth.

He’s naturally strong as hell and tall as a skyscraper because he’s a kraken squid, and he’s been like that since he turned 14. It’s because of that lots of people are always intimidated by him, even when he tries to prove he’s docile (Kind of a discrimination thing he’s gotta deal with everyday 😞). But deep down he’s a gentle giant. Really trustworthy man, too. He also has sharp claws; they’re very pretty

Got into a few fist fights, some double sided and… one sided, between him and some drink tampering shmucks Aloha would catch at his parties or at his parents’ bar. He’s never started a fight, but he has sure as hell finished them all

He’s kinda insecure about handling kids and hatchlings. He loves them to death, but because of his giant, intimidating feature, he knows he’d be prone to accidentally freaking younglings out. It also has to do with the fact that his hatchling cousin started crying really hard the millisecond Skull tried to hold them in his arms one time back when he was like 12; He still hasn’t gotten over it. It’s kinda ironic though, because despite his intimidating form, lots of younglings and hatchlings actually really like him right off the bat. It’s probably because he’s actually really good with kids in general. He’d play with them, keep them out of trouble, and just knows what they’d need on a whim. He’s your go-to babysitter kind of guy

His favorite pastries are cannolis, his favorite cakes are cheesecakes, and his favorite candy would be all three flavors of chocolate. He had a crisis when he had to choose one team during the chocolate splatfest

Really territorial about his food. He growls if you get near him while he’s eating food, especially sweets. Not only that, but he’s even worse when he’s with a significant other. He’ll straight up snarl at you if he feels like you’re bothering them. He’d even snap his teeth like a dog at you. Leave him alone to cuddle with his boyfriens >:(

He does also growl and snarl when he senses danger, if he’s pissed off, or if he just wants to be left alone in general. He’s got a low, deep growl that can pierce your soul. It’s some freaky shit. It makes for a good warning to not cross him, cuz he will fuck you up bad.

He also purrs a lot, and LOUDLY. He loves to purr, it’s his own way of showing affection. He also likes to nibble, whether it be on your hands, neck, ear, anywhere. He’ll also play bite and it‘s so ticklish. He’s like a doggy 💜💜💜

He had a crush on Mask once, back when they played in Inkopolis Plaza, but it was mostly because bro was so affectionate with him. Mask was actually his gay awakening before he decided that he liked imagining Mask as more of a friend. Mask also made for a great wingman, anyways.

Skull fell for Goggles the same reason he fell for Mask, because he was so nice and affectionate with him—even though he flashed him to the public in the square (you had to be there). He was also intrigued by him because he admired how Goggles faced him so determinedly, even after Goggles lost against him. He was the first person who wasn’t afraid of Skull, and that really did confuse him for an extended amount of time

There’s also Rider; He got the feels for Rider after he faced up against Emperor. He too admired Rider for his determination, and that was when he began to realize he had a type—and that he was poly. You could also say their pep talk they had before Rider faced Emperor’s team had played a part in it. They also got closer during the ranked battle championship arc.

As for Army, well, he and Army bonded when he found out Army was an octoling. Skull kinda related to him, as he was also seen as different from other inklings in society because of his large and intimidating structure—though Army didn’t really have to face that, but he was shamed for who he was by his grandad so that was something he and Skull had somewhat in common. He was also there to comfort Army when he was going through it with his grandad getting arrested and everything. He even offered him a place to stay if he needed, even when Army assured that Goggles’ parents were happy to have him around. He’s also really grateful for the fact that Army always makes sure to be his reminder for a bunch of things and also keeps him from getting lost, and his curry is YUM YUM YUM (proof that good food makes a even the bad bitches fold)

He and Aloha’s friend, Lilith started out a bit rocky, but then they grew to have a mutual trust in each other. They also ended up becoming friends after Lilith heard him singing and started singing along (they’re both shy about singing)

Weekly ink rifle meet up with Headphones and Half Rim. Eventually they started inviting N-Pacer! It’s just when they spend the day doing friend stuff, cuz theyre friends now :)

Rider

Real name is Roe

Is BRI’ISH. Heavy British accent boi; “oi my names Rida’ ”

Dude is so tone deaf. But he can keep a beat pretty well. He’s tried to play the drums at one point, but he hasn’t played in a while. He has to have his drum set hiding in his house somewhere

Socially detached. He was taken advantage by other kids a lot when he was younger, and those memories never left him. He’s also had a few issues growing up, too, especially without his dad.

His father left him and his mom before he and his sister were even born. He doesn’t even have a good idea as to what he looks like since his mom took down every photo in the house that he was in since he left them. His mom refuses to ever mention him, and if Rider ever does she’s quick to change the subject. All he knows is that he inherited his father’s voice, and both he and Platinum inherited his nose and lips. Rider never knew why he left. But truth be told, he doesn’t care no more, he’s got so many more people to worry about nowadays

Coming back to edit this part: He has a twin sister and a twin brother btw. He’s one of three triplets. His sister’s real name’s Rinet (it’s Renet but it’s just spelled differently) and his twin brother’s name is Ryan. Rinet’s nickname is Platinum while Ryan is Rockin’. Platinum wears the white inky rider and she mains the golden aerospray, while Cooler wears the Rockin’ leather jacket and mains the Golden Enperry Dualies. Rinet’s kinda an asshole but she’s a pretty fun friend to have around. Ryan is more laid back and a “go with the flow” kinda guy, but literally he doesn’t care about a lot of stuff. Rider and them all used to be on the same team until he got sick of Rinet’s shit because he thought she was such a snooty player and decided to go his own way while Rinet left with Ryan. Eventually, Rider found his own team that he has now. Every so often, if one of his teammates get sick or unavailable, Platinum will automatically fills in for them, and if not her, then it’ll be Rockin’ .

Platinum doesn’t play turf war or ranked battles that much. She’s mostly seen doing Grizzco shifts to try to help her and Rider’s mom pay the bills and get their mom closer to retirement; it’s also to save up money for college. Rockin’ and Rider wish she would quit someday, as they don’t trust Grizzco industries and their “policies” and work environment. Rider doesn’t admit it, but he worries about her a whole lot. Rockin’ does his best to keep an eye on her, mostly by tagging along with her in salmon runs as joint workers.

He’s pretty skilled with the E-Liter. He likes to stick with the no-scope; inspired by Headphones, in purpose of keeping an eye on his team.

He and Wireglasses weren’t related. They did grow up in the same neighborhood as kids, before Wireglasses moved to Splatsville with his parents. It made Rider kinda sad because they were actually good friends, one of the only real friends he ever really had before blue team. When they met again after he went to Splatsville, they gave each other a big ol hug.

His ass does not like Emperor. Emperor doesn’t like him either, except it’s more that he just doesn’t vibe with him, meanwhile Rider just LOATHES him to pieces. If they’re both in the same room, Rider will go out of his way to stand in the opposite side of the room just to be as far away from “that fancy ass whiteboy” as possible. It’s so ridiculously funny and more so when you remember that all of team blue are good friends with Emperor so it really ruffles Rider’s feathers.

He has nothing against Prince, tho. If the S4 say he’s cool, then he’s cool.

His mom is… She’s not perfect, to say the least. Who is, though? I mean, Sheena really did struggle to cope when he boyfriend abandoned her when she fell pregnant, with triplets no less. She absolutely refuses to drown her sorrows in alcohol and drugs, I implore her for that, but she was still incredibly depressed even when her kids came into the world. She was slightly neglectful during their first few years, and her parents didn’t bother to help her with them because she left them to be with her boyfriend, but they didn’t bother regaining contact even when she was struggling. Sheena got better eventually, especially after she started gaining more friends in the neighborhood who helped co-parent. Eventually she was able to get back on her feet and become the kind of parent she wanted to be for her three kids. Since then, she became a lot more energetic and bombastic, she had that cool aunt personality while juggling around two kids at the same time. She loves her babies to death, and she thinks it’s funny to kind of embarrass them in public all the time by giving them kisses all over their faces and head and giving them right hugs. Yes, it’s embarrassing, but Platinum, Rockin’ and Rider know that life would be a lot more duller without their mother around. 💚🤍🖤 (not me indulging in motorcycle mama 😭)

His mom’s part of a biker gang, and she has the nickname Rose because she wears a pink leather jacket that she got custom made. She’s got a sweet, red Road-King in the garage. She keeps saying that she’s gonna get Rider a black Road King someday when he’s old enough. Rider honestly doubts it, but don’t underestimate his mother’s determination to keep her word.

He’s honestly in no rush, really. In fact he’s afraid of getting back on the motorcycles again. He used to ride around on the back of his mom’s motorcycle and be part of “the gang,” but he take on a hiatus after a car accident that had him fist bumping death’s hand before he ended up in the hospital for almost a week with a scar that’s never gonna leave. He hasn’t road with her since, but even he admits that he wants to get back on it someday.

He’s pretty smart with cars and with motorcycles, too. He learned it all from his mom. Why go to the car repair center when you can take it over to his house to get it checked on? Charges a fair price, too. Rockin’ and Platinum like to help out too, but they’re much more experienced in motorcycles since they both own one and take of their own.

His right eye is partially blind from where he got sanitized. He would’ve felt more insecure about it if it weren’t for his boyfriends assuring him that he’s such a handsome boy every single day since they each of them got together.

Yes, he is built like a brick house. He swings a large mass of metal around like a wiffle bat everyday out in the battlefield. What else did you expect?

He’s so easy to scare, it’s hilarious. You can come up from behind him and go “BOO!” And he’ll jump a little and just glare at you. But if he gets really scared, like if he’s in one of those haunted house attractions, he’ll start screaming and slowly start falling to the ground in slow motion or just run off wordlessly. It’s even funnier because he’ll grab the nearest person he’s with and they’re both gonna eat shit together by falling or he’s gonna throw them over his shoulder and bull a skiddadle. Either that, or he’s just gonna run away so fast without saying anything; there was also this time he was playing basketball by himself in the evening and the lights suddenly went off and he SPED AWAY so fast you could hear the fear in his shoes when they squeaked. (That last part is based off a funny video I saw of a man running away when the streetlights went of). His ass does not like horror games, either

He has multiple pair of boots, and leather jackets.

He would absolutely wear the dreadlock hairstyle in Splatoon 3, he HAS too

He was very shocked to find out Army was an octoling, but he had his full support. But NOTHING could prepare him for when he finally met Goggles’ parents and learned that theyre octolings too. He likes them a whole lot, they’re very nice to him and they became friends with his mom when they all met each other at one of Goggle and Rider’s meet-your-parents dinner date

Ok so I’m so sorry I sorta just dumped my personal issues onto Mask that must’ve been really screwed up to read- (my mom didn’t die in a car crash but she had dementia and she died last year on new years). I was also indulging in Rider’s mom for a little bit, because, I wish my mom was still here to give me a bunch of kisses all over my face while I complain about people seeing us because- I miss that :(

Don’t worry about it 👍🏻

Also sorry for those who come back every so often and find out the headcanons have changed. I should probably just make part 3’s and 4’s but I don’t feel like it. I’m gonna do team blue at some point erp erp erp

And don’t look at me like that for also jumping on the oc x canon ship bandwagon with Mask. I just thought that they and Lilith would be silly together.

< Here’s the first part with Aloha and Army

[cybertron-after-dark]

ok ok shockwave anon again here to be cringe... could I please request a tfp shockwave × reader oneshot or drabble, where reader is indulging a touched starved shockwave and petting his helm and he leans into it and just gets all the lovings. i need to nurture this man so bad it makes me ill that I can't 😭 YOUR WRITING IS SO SOLID ILY TYSM

Bestie we're all cringe here, we on the robot kisser blog. Also thank you for the lovely words, barking at you in tism solidarity 💖

You really couldn't have predicted the chain reaction you set off on accident, honest. Not the scale of it, at least.

All you really did was try to hold his hand. Not something you were entirely sure would be possible, strictly speaking. The size difference was vast, but you were determined to do something sweet and romantic. You wanted to be a good partner. So, while he was at the lab table, fiddling with the components to a new cloning pod, you reached over to his free servo from your seat next to his workspace, brushing your hand against his much bigger digits. You weren't even fully sure if he'd notice, but the reaction was immediate.

He completely froze, his one optic fixed on you. After a pause, he spoke.

"Do you require anything?"

For a second you were scared he was annoyed, but he just sounded... Unsure? Always a bit hard to tell with Shockwave.

"Not trying to get your attention or anything, just holding your hand. Or, you know, holding a little of it," you answered, sheepish.

"For what purpose?" He asked, tilting his head.

"Oh! I didn't really stop to think if Cybertronians, like... Do that normally," you explained. "For humans it's like an affectionate gesture. Like, a convenient point of contact you can maintain while you maneuver around."

"Simply illogical..." he huffed.

"Sorry!" You squeaked, retracting your hand. Shockwave's antennae quickly flicked down a notch at the loss of contact. "Probably should've asked first..."

"I... You do not have to... I didn't..." He fumbled, his antennae whirring and flicking every which way as he tried to piece the sentence together.

You tried to help him out.

"...Did you want me to stop?"

"...No."

You brought your hand to his again, and you saw his optics dim as you ran your hand over his digits, tracing all the lines and seams you could reach.

"I do not understand why, but... This is enjoyable. I still assert that is fully illogical, though," he said. You could hear a slight rumbling coming from his chest. Revving his engine? Was he... Purring?

"Contact is just a staple of social creatures, man. Feels nice because you need it, or you start to go kinda feral," you explained.

"Dubious. I have lived a long life without any such contact, and I have never exhibited any signs of such regression," he refuted. The weight of his words took a moment to sink in.

"...wait you've never been touched like this? Just... For affection's sake?" You asked, bewildered.

"Of course not."

He really just didn't see anything wrong with that statement...

"Dude... That's..." You stuffed down the urge to call it sad. No pity. You know he can't stand pity. "Well, that's a lot of lost time we'll have to make up for." You tightened your hold on his digits in a squeeze, and the purr grew louder. It seemed he was agreeable to that.

"...May I request a specific point of contact?" He queried. You nodded your head, and he leaned down over the table, resting his helm (sort of) on your lap, though shifting his weight awkwardly so you didn't get crushed. You couldn't look him in the optic, his gaze was pointed far to the side, but you could see the tentative shift of his audial fins well enough to know he wasn't sure how this would go. "I have seen this behavior exhibited in humans regardless of the species of the recipient. I believe the colloquial term is 'head pats.' I hypothesize it will be more... Normal, given the difference in our scale and physiology," he reasoned.

"Oh yeah, nothing weird about petting a giant robot like a puppy," you snarked. His audial fins flicked back, but quickly returned upwards when you started petting his helm. The purring deepened, a low, bassy sound that you felt more than you heard, especially with him so up close and personal. Odd as the setup was, it was nice, and you felt good knowing he was finally getting some much-deserved affection. You felt a little bad that he might get in trouble for slacking on his work, that cloning pod is long forgotten, but for the moment, it could wait. For the moment, you just wanted to love on your boyfriend as he melted into your touch, letting yourself melt into the soft sounds of his rumbling engine and the contented sighs he let out in your hold.

[saltynsassy31]

no cus i totally understand your frustration, ive also quit splatfests for the moment until they get an overhaul

i suggest if you feel close to getting hateful to either shiver or shiver fans then maybe quit for a while for your own sake cus ive felt a lot better after doing so, im still really sensitive to negative comments towards frye or rude ones about shiver winning but taking some time for myself has made me feel infinitely better

ive been close to hating shiver before bc of how cocky and rude them and their fans can be but it doesnt really do anything but sour your enjoyment of the game more, so its really not worth it

i do have to say though, anyone who says "its just a game" reaaally needs to understand the frustration of people OTHER than them, sympathy is something a lot of people forget about when it comes to things that arent real life. just because it doesnt affect you doesnt mean everyone can shut off their attachment to the game or a character like a light switch; a lot of the time you dont know whats going on with them. i myself am really attached to frye cus i am hashtag autism creature and he brings me comfort, so anyone being rude to me about shiver winning really REALLY gets under my skin. its not entirely (if they were serious, if they werent then its not at all) their fault, but nintendo fixing the frustration of splatfests constantly keeling in one direction (which theyre supposed to do anyways but they havent) would definitely fix the issue. we need to find a way to have nintendo fix this, not attack anyone else for what bundle of pixels and text theyre attached to.

not everyone has really thick skin and if we want splatoon 3 to be more hospitable then we should try to cut down on the general splatfest bullassery in public spaces (being overly cocky and rude/blaming others in a way with no basis or truth behind it). its not something everyone can always do since we arent all perfect, but if we make steps in that direction then we could help more people enjoy the splatoon community rather than being eaten up by toxicity and spite

i didnt word all of this entirely correctly so like interpret ad best as you can cus im eepy but yeah.

a fye for u to enjoy (also ur anon is off btw)

u dont have to but for the sake of not being harrassed id appreciate if u didnt tag with public tags

👏👏 PREACH

I don't want to quit playing it, I do enjoy splatfests, to a certain extent, i like going with my friends and i made a lot of new friends through it, it's like, the online community that I'm having a problem with

I don't hate shiver, I thought I did but I can't, she is still a comfort character (tho Frye is like, my obsession besides being my comfort character cuz I am also part part the 'tism XD), in a way, I like her dynamic with the group at least, she annoys me, yes, very much so, but I don't hate her

And I don't hate people who like her either

Who I do hate is people being mean about it, I had turned off anon cuz of a stupid person who was going around every frye support account anonymously just saying mean stuff and praising shiver as the best, I just forgot to turn it on, so thanks for reminding me 😅

Saying that "It's just a game" is so annoying to, tell that to the football fans, they go just as crazy if not more so

Splatfests are ment to be fun! You should be able to enjoy the splatfest without having to worry about people fighting

I don't like fighting with people, I hate how angry I become, how mean I can sound sometimes, I usually just vent without interacting

At least she won in Japan, so that is one other win under her belt, I just wish she'd win more in the future 😔

Oh also I almost didn't participate in this splatfest either and I did only because I haven't had time to play and I haven't finished my catalogue yet 😅 I usually use splatfests to up my catalogue quicker lmao

Also, don't worry, I won't tag anything that could get you harassed, if anything does happen, please block for your health, I don't want anything happening to you, you seem very sweet ;w;

Edit: also YOUR FRYE PLUSH IS SO CUTE! I've been seeing people get her but idk where to buy her!!!! Where'd you get it? :0

[blue-unifox]

if we can submit multiple characters for trhe ask thing.........bows my head in shame and avoids eye contact

i think you can, hee hoo

First impression

I mean, her first appearance was pretty nice, tho not very clear what kind of character she would be. Though, her interaction with Almer was cute... and I could relate to the awkwardness and being unable to communicate clearly what you mean.

Impression now

Ahhh she's precious, she's the tism creature that also has all the angst. And yet she's still holding on strong! She just wants the good for everyone! Be nice to her please! I love that she's being treated well by every character and isn't infantilized, even tho she might seem "weird" to most.

Favorite moment

OH GOSH there's several good ones.... hmmm if I was to pick I'd go with when she and Jodi talk about her past and then just hug. ITS SO PRECIOUS??? IM SOBBING 🥺🥺🥺🥺 Girlie had to go thru so much, yet she's still smiling.... And Jodi is just like... so happy for her genuinely... ough

Idea for a story

No ideas yet but... Who knows, maybe I'll cook smt in the future 👀. There is certainly a lot to explore.

Unpopular opinion

I'm not reeeeally the biggest fan *ae and Almer being romantically involved... like, I like some fan depictions, but just as is in canon she doesn't seem very interested in romance at all, so it's one-sided at best. Though again, if it's your favorite, I don't judge!

Favorite relationship

Hough... dogdeer or Jodi mom.... Hard to choose, tho in canon I'd say I like her relationship w Jodi more... They're just OUGH 🥺🥺🥺🥺(as evident by the scene above)

Favorite headcanon

I do quite like your hc about *ae liking bugs... Like this makes a lot of sense, is one of those "weird niche interests", and just fits her in general :3c.

[dxwnfxll]

Magma board doodles with friends : D

(Friends! @dani-fox dark red ink @porcucatchaos black ink @thecityofmoss brown ink ) mine are the bright red : D

Click for better resolution

Elder scrolls and friendo getting surrounded by tisms

Everybody is so mean to me !! - Uthol depression creature + tisms

Elder scrolls moment

Full pics

[splatoon-edits]

I'm of the assumption that you're a Shiver fan do you wanna explain some HCs or reasons you like her?👂👂 I'm interested (I like her too 😋)

oh boy. do you even know what you've done? I am going to talk about this blue creature SO MUCH!!!!! (no but fr thank you for enabling me to talk about one of my fav characters!!!)

I'm just gonna be rambling with no general direction, so i apologize if this gets a smidge confusing..... Everything else will be under a read more since i don't want this post to make it hard to scroll through my blog if it gets too long.

so.. Splat 3 was my first game in the series. I knew about the other splatoon games obviously, and i was eagerly awaiting splatoon 3 since by the time i got a switch it would have been a waste to buy splat 2. So i went into splatoon 3 with very minimal knowledge of the characters/setting.

But when i saw Shiver in the Deep Cut announcement trailer??? It was love at first sight. Blue is my favorite color and the swag Shiver has is off the charts. Plus the hype around a potentially nonbinary character?? And imma be honest, i'm a sucker for smug characters. Especially the ones who are secretly failures. It's just one of my fav tropes.

So in short: Shiver was a character who had a lot of appeal for me in the beginning. But slowly over time as i came to learn more about her and the rest of Deep Cut, i came to appreciate them even more in new ways. Shiver is smug, sarcastic, and can come off as mean or over the top. But she is also silly, quirky, and has a lot of love in her heart for others. She cares about Frye, Bug Man, and all of Splatsville. She says silly things that don't make sense. She likes puns. She takes the time to listen to Sheldon's rambles. She is so much more than what you see on the surface. And it can be so easy to see her teasing her bandmates and assume she is mean or cold hearted. But she genuinely is such a fun character!!!!

Her grace, her gnc swag, her cringefail aura, everything about her makes her an amazing character.

And now, for some headcanons in no particular order:

I kinda see Shivers gender as "whatever is funniest/best in the moment. Commit to the bit of genders. But if i had to pick one thing to headcanon them as it would be pangender or maybe genderfluid. Uses all pronouns plus some shark themed neos like bite/biteself and fin/finself and anything else like that. Im gonna be mostly sticking to she/her and they/them for this post just cuz i think that's what people will be most used to. But really any gender hc for Shiver is correct in my head. MTF? Correct. Nonbinary? Correct. FTM? Correct. Genderfluid? Correct/ Bigender? Correct. Anything and anything goes an i love seeing everyone's takes on it!

I'm gonna go ahead and say trans woman Shiver has a special place in my heart. I just feel like i never see anyone hc this but i also feel like it works?? Idk... The same can be said for genderfluid Shiver. I myself am genderfluid so i rlly like that hc!

Mayhaps has a touch of the tism. (me too) I just feel like she doesn't read social cues well. Can mask really well but doesn't do it around Frye and Big Man for the most part. I think all of Deep Cut is autistic tbh. With Frye having ADHD as well. (ME TOO)

I'm caught between the headcanons of "secretly rlly strong cuz of archery" and "lowkey weak cuz it would be funny to contrast w Frye being strong". But i lean more on the side of both of them being strong. Just Frye having more obvious muscles. But if you look at Shiver she def if strong. And graceful. Like a predator built for ambush or stalking. She moves with purpose. Ya know what i mean? Like she seems very graceful and delicate at first but that is NOT the case.

I gotta be careful or this will turn into general Deep Cut hcs cuz i wanna talk about Big Man and Frye as well lol

Loses her temper easily. Can be petty when things don't go her way.

Master Mega is very special to them. She spent a lot of time with him when she was younger and her parents were busy.

Shiver whistles a lot as a stim/just for fun.

Big Man and Frye are the best hype men ever for Shiver. There are certain points in the game where she says absolute nonsense but those two are right there to back her up. They also don't understand what he's saying, but they are gonna act as if it's the smartest thing ever. Shiver thinks she is the coolest thing ever and those two only enable her. (dw. every once in a while they knock her down a peg by returning her teasing)

Shiver is the type of person to spend 30 minutes making her food look pretty before she serves it. It has to look good or else.

Is a decent cook. Frye likes to steal bits of food from whatever she is working on so Shiver will playfully smack her with her fan and shoo her out of the kitchen.

Is very proud of her singing. She worked very hard to get it as perfect as it is.

Probably used to have a violent streak in middle school, would bite people. Has since learned to control her anger better.

Very confident. Isn't afraid of things like public speaking.

Gets annoyed easily when overstimulated. Sometimes snaps at people when the environment is too noisy/bright or if she is tired. Tries to apologizes afterwards.

Speaking of apologies, she is the type of person to do something nice for you or get you food/a present for you rather tha admit she is wrong. Is embarrassed easily and instead prefers wordless apologies.

Is flustered easily. One of the ways to easily make her lose her cool is to do anything remotely flirty or to bring up something embarrassing she did in the past.

I could probably ramble more but it's LATE and i should head to bed. Thank you so much for the ask!!!! I had a fun time talking about my favorite blue goofball. <3

[todays-fixation-is-spite]

Rant below because I'm so sick of "haha Estinien dummy". Nothing I say will change it, the damage was done come Endwalker and is just being driven into the ground like a bad joke.

The continued stupefying of a character who was never once characterized as -stupid- or dense in the beginning. Estinien is sharp as a tack, he -has- to be to hold the position he does and attain wins against creatures well beyond anything that's ever lived in the canon. He was literally the first one to step up when it came to the conflict between himself and Ysayle regarding standing up for the conviction of her side of things, insist on -proving- him wrong because this was war, if she couldn't convince him, how did she hope to convince fuckin' -dragons- to change their ways and heel turn at the last minute. He knew exactly the timing on how to watch over the Scions in-city and recognize we're up to some major shit, and we'll need all the help we can get. His end goal is undeniably selfish, but he's still at heart getting his and still protecting Ishgard as a whole, while effectively getting around the tyrannical Orthodoxy of the time.

Is he a bit of a -prick-? Definitely! Does he push someone's buttons the moment they show a vulnerability? Yeah! His own trainers did that with him, by his own word in 3.3, "teachers to console and admonish me". Let's not forget his own words observing the real ass truth that if every person in Ishgard could know the thoughts of all others, the city would fall within the hour. He survived Ishgard, an -Orthodoxy- with an actual ass -Inquisition- constantly on the hunt for anyone that endangered their political rhetoric, and he knows how to navigate around and evade them. What part of that isn't -reading the room- by having the social intelligence to immediately find the weaknesses in the people around him and know how to push, pull, or get out of the way to get what he wants.

Estinien is an -ass-, yes. Not a -fool- whose incapable of the basics we've literally seen shown in the game come his fleshing out in HW. (Yes, granted, ARR Estinien is single-minded, this is because DRG 30-50 is copy pasted from 1.0 and that era's writing is very weak.)

Take a good look at HW Estinien and -insist- he's incapable, how does anyone do it? When everyone collectively decided "he dummy/ he stoopid", was anybody actually looking at him, did anybody pay any fucking attention?

Stop making fools of perfectly capable characters, who show ON SCREEN with real canon evidence they are better than Fandom, for whatever reason, choses to drag them down to, fuck.

Yoshi P said this because it's the popular fucking opinion, for some reason. The editor has it correct. Estinien doesn't -diminish- or mask himself for others, you get him as he is, unfiltered (unless it's a true and real danger, in which case he generally doesn't speak and he knows when not to do that, see; Surviving Ishgard). He knows who he is, he's proud of it, and there's zero way someone who -survived what he has-, did it, by being clueless and incapable of taking in the fine details around him.

Being a brusque introvert with the Tism does not make you into what Estinien has been made into by EW. I can't believe how many Estinien stans firmly stand on the point he's a fool when there is clear proof to the contrary. There's nothing he's experienced since then that proves he's suddenly lost what -experience- taught him. EW sat here trying to say Estinien gets swindled easy, then drove that into the ground by making it a running gag, as if he didn't make it through -Kugane- on his own -just fine-, like it somehow doesn't have swindlers and cheats and Thavnair does??? He was self sufficient from the moment he left Ishgard in 3.3, but suddenly nah, he's a fool now in EW, because Fandom decided, Haha funnee stinkman doesn't take a bath haha.

I get that we like to project ourselves onto characters as much as we like to take personality traits from them, but what does it say when someone completely -replaces- the actual nature of a character with just themselves. Did you -ever- actually like the -character-...?

It is a failure to misread a character at his beginnings so completely that as writers got shuffled around and new people came on board, they chose to reinforce that belief because it's popular. It felt like only ONE writer was resisting this in EW and more often than not, it was on side, non-voiced dialogue that gets missed or just ignored.

That the writers on hand -now- insist on keeping up this farce is even worse. It's not representative to make Estinien like this and try to use the "relatable" banner as another ND status character we decide on retroactively, by the way. -How- is it not actively demeaning to declare that about a character and then look at what he was at the start and then see that the writers are -going along- with "Ah yes, actually he Can't." when he actively can and does. That's -saying- Neurodivergence -is- an inability to read people (which in some cases yes! However!)- when Masking is literally the very essence of -reading the room- to -survive the room-. Masking makes us so good at taking in the details it becomes difficulty to have an identity -outside- of reading people effectively to survive. We're BRILLIANT- exhausted, but brilliant! We shouldn't let writers spin the narrative like we're not because we willingly decide "Oh yeah, that's me actually." and get a laugh out of not just erasing who a -beloved- character -is-, but in turn use that relatability to declare -boldly- that we also don't know how to do things we do, every day, because NTs expect it of us.

And we pat Yoshi P on the back for "setting that straight", -really-?

The respect is gone, if some people ever had it, and that's tragic for a character who has made it as far as Estinien has and genuinely healed from some of the worst shit, who realistically healed from it -with the assistance of others-, a group that accepts him for who he is completely, which is a good depiction of mending from horrendous trauma. I would think with that representation that all us traumatized people would -appreciate- that and celebrate Estinien without having to demean him and turn him into Post EW Estinien, who is 90% somewhere between turned into a fool torn down and laughed off when he's speaking straight facts or just being sexualized on screen like everyone else now because sex sells. x.x

im glad yoshi-p set the record straight

[transmandrake]

I would not describe myself as plural or, dissociative in a, constant sense. But I do have moments where I can tell the boundaries between my body, the pilot of my body, and on occasion the 'thought havers' of my mind.

It's rare, but I've had a cold recently and it was quite distinctive with the mild fever disrupting the 'control'.

I am aware in those moments that the 'thinker' has changed from myself in the past, that who I was is no longer with me in a, 'making decisions' sense. I was sort of asking this question to my newest 'headmate' (who i have drawn but only posted in my latest art, its name is Morpho i think) and while I definitely don't have any kind of amnesia between identities or very much 'switching' , it was apparent that those memories are, stored away, accessed secondhand. And well... My memory is so shit, even when I feel completely single they are distant and almost impersonal, and very fragmented.

(air quotes isnt like a doubt thing I just want to clarify I do not believe I experience it, and so feel inadequate to use the terminology confidently)

I think this was something I was progressing towards in my childhood, having to act very differently around my father, my mom, siblings, friends, strangers.

But I think I was taken out of that environment at just the right time to 'reintegrate' myself.

However I had a lot of, in hindsight, dissociative episodes, in school, mostly due to, again in hindsight being very autistic and ADHD, and depressed from the age of, what, 14? And I would say that kept me from, for lack of a better phrase, healing entirely.

I am still compartmentalised, but there are no borders, just... doors that are usually locked. Sometimes theyre open but no one is there, sometimes theyre locked but I feel a presence, and on very rare occasion I see glimpses of them or, as with my fever state, can actually interact with and distinguish them from 'myself'.

I still feel silly saying I'm a traumatised person, since, well, I forgot pretty much all of the really bad stuff, and a lot of it I was of course shielded from.

(Domestic violence warning)

Instead of memories of... I think my dad threw an ashtray at my mom? Or threatened her with a knife?

My only memory of that event is infodumping to a police officer about how many pokemon I could name. It was not a scary experience (copaganda tho. And im white. And autistic so I never clocked that this was Not Normal. Police came to us / our neighbors allllll the time. Wild.)

But nonetheless I bear some form of trauma from it. I got tense approaching Dublin (Ireland) for the first few times because the red bricks remind me of England. It amuses me but it speaks to shallow but definitely present scars.

Is that the source of this? Was it my disocciating in school? I have nooo idea. Maybe it's just The 'Tism.

My uncle has schizophrenia so it's not impossible it's some sort of latent psychosis, but if anything I think I was more 'symptomatic' in my youth, but unable to recognise it, as I had never encountered genuine or nonmedicalised discussions of DID and plurality.

Should I, encourage this? I have no idea. This is definitely part of why I prefer it/they pronouns, it especially. That disconnect, while subtle usually, is and has been a big part of who 'I' am. But I still have my boy days, and girl days. I am just a sort of thing or creature primarily.

If you're still reading, uhhhh. Idk. Hi. If you knew me a long time ago I still care about you but I feel like I've never met you. Maybe I want to but it's hard. Idk who you are but I remember you.

Infinite Metamorphosis.