fallen-goldfishcracker

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

You can be talking to someone and she'll be like, "Oh I made a silly mistake. Women don't deserve voting rights teehee." And you'll be like, "What." And she'll be like, "Oh I'm sorry! That must sound so bad out of context. No it's this Tiktok meme where, if you're a girl and you do something dumb, you say 'Women don't deserve voting rights teehee.'"

And you'll be like, "That sounds bad." And she'll be like, "No no. It's totally not that bad. It's just a meme. Men say it too. Like if a man does something silly he'll be like, 'I am like those women who do not deserve to vote.'" And you'll be like, "Does that make it better?" And she'll be like, "Well there was one guy who tried to make 'Men shouldn't vote' a popular meme. But it never caught on and also he got yelled at a lot."

And then you drop it there because like, you're harshing the vibe.

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

game developers you are banished to wii hardware limits until you learn your lesson

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

okay fucking fine guys lets make the most fucked up sandwich ever since that's all you want to do.

I'll start: bread

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

going to ao3 and sorting by internalized homophobia

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

elon musk is like if you distilled the essence of 2010 “you, sir, win the most epic of upvotes” reddit and put it into the body of a wealthy peanut factory owner from 1835 london who exclusively employed 5 year old orphans

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

'he would not fucking say that' maybe he would if he knew he was starring in his very own porn fic for the sole purpose of delighting some freaks on archive of our own dot org. maybe he'd play it up for the cameras. ever consider that

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

why is france called the hexagon when its abundantly clear that it’s a pentagon

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

people who remember their childhoods to a normal degree will never understand the feeling of spawning into the world half-formed at age 12

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

this meeting could have been a car crash

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

(person with normal hobbies and interests voice) hey do you guys wanna see some good screenshots from my screenshots folder

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

sex isn’t real they made that up to sell rock n roll records

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

has anyone else been getting stupider and worse or is it just me

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

weekends last for 5 secs now. if you are lucky.

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

usually when you have a stomach bug your body is like yes sir we'll get this punk out of here, 48 hours tops. then you get a cold and your body is like I dunno ... between a few hours and eleven months ... maybe a week minimum .... you gotta understand we're short staffed

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

why would they haunt people if theres no profit incentive

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

plethora

[fallen-goldfishcracker]

boyfriends who hate your friends should be shot on sight in the national interest. friends who hate your boyfriend are a necessary part of the ecosystem. this is called symbiosis