#tired and sad and tired and sad and tired and sad and annoyed.
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Wait, holdup. Are you telling me that modern AU Machete used to smoke? Can we have more information on this, please?
Although a cigarette between his fingers might fit his silhouette, I can't imagine Machete smoking. Isn't he a health and hygiene freak?
He started smoking as a sad and disillusioned teen, mostly because some of his mature and edgy friends smoked and he wanted to seem mature and edgy as well.
First and foremost it was a way to manage stress, it gave him an impression that he was at least somewhat in control of his nerves. He does have a lot of health/hygiene anxiety, but he tried to justify it to himself by claiming that since he's so diligent and careful about everything else, surely he can afford to have this one bad habit that he's already familiar with. He wasn't proud of it, he knew perfectly well how smoking was objectively harmful, but he's fairly skilled in keeping himself in denial about things he's unwilling to contemplate. Also he's an extremely routine oriented person and it really rustles his jimmies when his daily rituals and personal coping mechanisms are tampered with.
I think he finally managed to quit for good some time after getting together with Vasco. Mostly because he had to start thinking about himself and his life in a new light and it made him painfully self-conscious about the whole thing. He was worried about smelling off-putting, tired of not being able to keep up with him physically and just generally guilty and embarrassed about being potentially annoying and unpleasant to be around.
#answered#anonymous#modern au#Vaschete lore#smoking#cw smoking#what if my boyfriend won't want to sit next to me if I'm stinky#and it worked#his self-esteem improved a little#regaining his sense of smell and taste and lung capacity meant he was getting more out of life in general#he's still paranoid about the possibility of self-induced lung cancer years after quitting but it is what it is
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venti x reader fluff / confession
he woke up and chose you.
you had held your breath all night, barely sleeping because what if he didn’t?
you remember telling him with tears rolling down your cheeks , how you felt.
you were a bit tipsy but this was the only way. you didn’t even know if he heard you correctly as he was ready to pass out when you said it.
you had told him, “did you even hear me?” your voice was so shaky it barely came through.
his answer was cold, “I did.” and then, he was gone.
for the first time in months you slept on your own. actually, you didn’t go home. it’s too awkward stumbling into a house you haven’t been in for two whole months. plus, it’s three am. you made a warm spot in this dark alley that he left you in.
maybe it wasn’t the best idea but you were so tired and so fucking sad too.
all you wanted was him and he couldn’t accept that. you remember a sob erupting out of your mouth before you passed out.
you wake up with the warmth of a soft mattress. so warm and you turn over… wait a minute?! you fell asleep in an alley. in fact, as you wake up you’re greeted by the site of… venti? the one who left you last night. stranded.
actually you huff. it’s annoying how cute it is that he carried you here and made sure you were safe.
slowly, you get up and feel sort of out of it. your limbs ache a bit, and you wonder how long you were there.
venti bites his lip. “I was coming back for you. I stupidly left in a panic. I sobered up after that and went to find you.”
“okay? so what? what do you have to say then,” quickly, you sit up, throwing the blanket off you.
venti gently pulls on your fingers with his own to clasp them between his own. he’s warm.
“okay. I deserve that. /but/ I do know something good here. you mean more to me than anything else in this world. it scares me. “
you take ur hands away from his. he sucks in a sharp breath. he’s losing you, he’s losing you. you can see that look in his eyes.
“I need more than just a ‘I care about you’. that much is obvious and you know that’s not what I was asking. “
venti sighs. he doesn’t even need to, but he does anyway.
“okay. you want the full thing? here it goes. y/n. I love you so dearly and so much. I don’t want to be without you. I left to clear my head for one moment and was coming right back for you. I carried you by hand all the way here, selfishly. I wanted to know what it felt like to carry you in my arms. the way I feel about you makes me feel incapable emotions. things a god cannot feel,” he smiles sadly, “and yet, I feel so proud of how I feel about you.”
you don’t know what to say. your heart is beating so fast against your chest. you cannot make it stop. a smile breaks across your face unknowingly.
You did the only thing that you know how to: you place your hands in a tender embrace onto his cheeks and pull him towards you. your lips meet and it’s better than life itself.
he smiles against your lips and grips your waist like it’s his life force. he keeps kissing you over and over and over again.
#genshin#genshin impact#genshin x reader#genshin fluff#Venti#genshin venti#venti fluff#venti x reader
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What your fav Legion says about you, from some nerd on an app
Ultramarines:
I like to think of you guys like Glock owners. Yes, on paper, you guys are the least creative but that means you guys are the most reliable. Guilliman was probably the best primarch to come back to the setting because he was the most stable, and it shows in his marines, who don’t have trauma for the sake of plot. You admire the other legions, but it’s the no nonsense approach they bring to battle that you respect the most.
For honor and glory.
Blood Angels:
You think Vampires are dope as Fuck, and you’re right. Your favorite TV show is probably season 1 of Netflix’s Castlevania (same) or HELLSING, and play the Vampire Counts in the Total War Warhammer games. You go into a seething rage at the merest mention of the WarMaster, and probably wanna rip Erebus’s hearts out and lay them before sanguinius’s feet. You’re probably a bit annoyed with people hiding their gear from you because they think you’re a Blood Raven, but you’ll forgive them in time.
Dark angels:
You think Medieval Knights are dope as Fuck, and you’re right. You dig the chivalry and honor they embody at all times, think dark green and gold looks drippy (it does), and think the Lion is an absolute badass (he is). You also probably grieved for what the honored 1st could’ve been before GW wrote them to all be paranoid douchebags, and can’t wait for the returned Lion to make some changes around his legion. Also, you’re extremely tone deaf, please learn to read the room yall
Salamanders:
OUT OF THE FIRE, AND UNTO THE ANVIL!
Whilst I’m more of a Blood Angel or Iron Hand myself, I have Immense respect for the sons of Vulkan. You think blacksmithing is cool as fuck and probably watch clips of Forged in Fire, or any of the various Blacksmith YouTubers there are. You also think Fire is cool, and think that Astartes should be nicer to Guardsmen in lore.
Imperial Fists:
As an Iron Warrior simp, suck my toes you Imperial Favorite. Now that that’s out of the way, the Imperial Fists is an entire legion of Engineers including you (probably). You think Emotions only make Simple things Complex and thus think as logically as life will let you, fair enough. Youre as tired of the “Imperial Fists are as cold as their home world” about as much as you are of Perturabo’s complaining, miss your genefather, and can feel the happy chemicals SURGING in your brain looking upon a reinforced defense manned by soldiers who’s only concern is holding the line.
Iron Hand:
As an Iron Hand myself, I know the “daddy issues” joke is fruit hanging lower than Ferrus Manus’s head rolling around on the floor, so I won’t. You’re a lot like an Imperial Fist, critically logical and as stalwart as Iron, but unlike imperial fists you’re allowed to have a personality! Unfortunately that Personality is tempered by a healthy dose of Trauma! Your hatred for the Emperor’s Children is just as violent as the Blood Angels and the Sons of Horus, and you pray Fulgrim gets a model so you can personally shoot him in the mouth.
White Scars:
You’re a vehicle guy, and you like going Fast. You also have a great appreciation for cultures like Feudal Japan, Ancient China, Mongolia, etc. idk what else to put here since I’ve never really… looked into their lore… (-(
Raven Guard:
You’re a quiet person, maybe you’re emo/punk, maybe you like dressing up gothic, but you’re definitely the quiet type. Whether that’s social anxiety or just a person of few words doesn’t matter too much, you vibe with the sad raven boys cuz they’re badasses. Unfortunately I cannot take those beaked helmets seriously.
Space Wolves:
I heard an explanation that I agree with once. You guys have such a rich history, a badass primarch that’s probably gonna return (eventually), and a very well developed Viking aesthetic that Is appreciated by those willing to dig into it… but to everyone on the outside you’re just a furry. And it’s kinda tragic…
Anyways, this is all just my opinion which means obviously this is Fact and should be Definitely taken as such
#in hashtags we trust#warhammer 40k#headcanon#40k#space marines#space marine 2#warhammer 40000#scifi#stereotypes#obviously fact#Found the Soundsmith fan
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absolutely baffling to me that you can purchase a condo in a building u have absolutely no control over and somehow still owe an hoa 300+ a month.
#at this point im not making myself sad im making myself exasperated#looking at condos in minneapolis for some reason#i have no savings i can't even consider purchasing property lmao#rentals ARE so expensive everywhere that it makes me want to cry though.#and also throw up.#tired and sad and tired and sad and tired and sad and annoyed.#chatter
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something. about. the horror of being sent on an impossible (death) quest and obligations and hospitality politics. the trauma of not having a home, and then the trauma of being in a house that becomes actively hostile to you, one that would swallow you whole and spit out your bones if you step out of line. all of this is conditional, your existence continues to be something men want gone.
it's about going back as far as I can with the perseus narrative because there's always a version of a myth that exists behind the one that survives. the missing pieces are clearly defined, but the oldest recorded version of it isn't there! and there's probably something older before that!! but it's doomed to forever be an unfilled space, clearly defined by an outline of something that was there and continues to be there in it's absence.
and love. it's also about love. even when you had nothing, you had love.
on the opposite side of the spectrum, this is Not About Ovid Or Roman-Renaissance Reception, Depictions And Discourses On The Perseus Narrative.
edit: to add to the above, while it's not about Ovid, because I'm specifically trying to peel things back to the oldest version of this story, Ovid is fine. alterations on the Perseus myth that give more attention Medusa predate Ovid by several centuries. this comic is also not about those, either! there are many versions of this story from the ancient world. there is not one singular True or Better version, they're all saying something.
Perseus, Daniel Ogden
Anthology of Classical Myth: Primary Sources in Translation, edited & translated by Stephen M Trzaskoma, R. Scott Smith, Stephen Brunet
#perseus#danae#komiks tag#long post#every other week i start to say something about how greek heroes are a good case study in diaspora and exile trauma#but man perseus makes me so sad. so does danae. she loves her son :(#perseus turning a whole island to stone is a huge mood. i would also do that if i were him#anyway (salutes) take care everyone i gotta watch yunho's new video it looks like a fucking movie im so excited#(i singled out ovid bc i remember the fucking shit perseus discourse that ran through this site. i remember#im preemptively loading a gun and pointing at it before it can touch this post#it hasn't died out either i see it on twitter all the time in the most ANNOYING ways possible i am TIRED#esp bc they're actually doing medusa a narrative disservice like congrats! you made it worse! stop telling me it's better!!!!)#it’s all greek to me
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I'm having a bad mood today
Would you draw my blorbo for me please?
#If you have time/energy/willing for that though. No pressure#Im sad and annoyed bc i couldn't get my blood tasted today#They only signed me up for an appointment in a month#And its already been so long since i try to figure out what is wrong with me bc my stomach doesn't work as it supposed to#I'm tired and hurt and all this is very discouraging#Mom tells me to go to the private lab to get my tests done faster but it costs money and we haven't been having much of those#She says that my health is more important and she's right but i just feel so bad and guilty for spending money on myself#When it is possible to get free medical treatment#But URGHHH the free one is sooo looong#And the problem is also that bc im an immigrant here i often don't understand how the system works here and i do mistakes#Like today I came to the hospital thinking i can get my blood tested right away with my doctors prescription in my hand#But no i only got it registered and got an appointment on 17 of December#Fucking urghhh#Im just tired and frustrated that's all#Anyway#Wanna draw buba for me? 👉👈🥺
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Resistance hero and his trophy immortal husband,
but I just call this AU 'Ouch, The Immortality Problem'
#sonic the hedgehog#sonadow#shadow the hedgehog#sonic x shadow#shadonic#Tails and Amy are there and they are TIRED#givin' the fighting to save the world constantly more serious vibes n aging them a bunch cuz yea#but it's still silly cuz i suck at angst even tho i make myself sad when thinking abt Shadow's immortality#Sonic got his first gray quill at 29 the intense life caught up with him#they're around 35 on these pics#Shadow went thru some changes n aging but it stops completely around 35 too and he's annoyed that Sonic is still taller#even tho there's barely any difference lmao
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why is it that everyone ghosts me but then expect the most from me?
#girl blogger#girlblogging#hell is a teenage girl#just girly thoughts#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#lana del rey#girlhood#gaslight gatekeep girlboss#girl thoughts#coquette#i hate ghosting#ghosting#i am annoyed#cinnamon girl#chemtrails over the country club#coquette aesthetic#sad thoughts#jennifers body#jennifer check#ribbons and bows#lana is god#ultraviolence#born to die#respond to me#i am tired#girl interrupted#manic pixie dream girl#just girly things#this is a girlblog#im just a girl
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Sketches I made at school
#kirby#kots#kirby of the stars#kirby fanart#hoshi no kirby#Taranza#Magolor#marx#queen Sectonia#waddle dee#king dedede#very fond of the spider dude#today was a tough day and I can always rely on Taranza to think#'damn this guy is pathetic and going through it he's just like me'#at this point Taranza isn't sad she's just annoyed#at least my Taranza I've made him sad too many times he's tired of it#he's just not impressed#what's that? a mask of my dead (girl)friend? seen that before#'been there done that you know what give me the mask I'll wear it myself'#i get sad when I think about Taranza being all alone in Floralia#so I like to think he comes down often to help Dedede around#i just know at the beginning Dedede was just making up tasks just so Taranza could come out of his big ass castle#i just like the idea of their friendship#specially with Dedede's and Sectonia's parallels#i have this hc that waddle dees adopt people and now they're honorary waddle dees#Taranza cries so hard when Dedede tells him he's now considered one of them#when Dedede explained the concept of honorary waddle dee Taranza was like 'oh like you' and Dedede 'wdym'#Dedede thinks he's a waddle dee hc#if you're wondering who else is in the group it's Kirby Taranza Magolor and technically Dedede
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The reason this fandom hates IDW Optimus isn't because he's a cop (plenty of people are fine with Prowl) or because he's a bastard (most characters in IDW are) but because he commits the crime of being an actual person who's messy, flawed, and makes a shitload of high stakes mistakes fitting for the intense situations and pressure he's put under constantly.
But we can't have Optimus actually react to his situations by lashing out or being unpleasant, no, he has to have the personality of a cardboard cutout of G1 whose only defining personality traits are "dad, funny, nice," and if he ever vents negative emotions it can only ever be #relatable depression or him being sad on his own without ever letting it show during the important parts of the story. If Optimus dares do things like be angry or frustrated or bitter it's just a sign that he's a bastard and LITERALLY the worst Optimus ever. If Optimus ever makes mistakes or does wrong things in the heat of anger/frustration/stress it's because he's just an evil bastard with no redeeming traits.
God forbid Optimus go through an unending gauntlet of war, politics, atrocities, near-complete loneliness, and a seemingly endless cycle of violence for his entire life and come out of it kind of bitter, angry, and tired of dealing with people's shit. He's not allowed to be a realistic person, context doesn't matter, sympathy doesnt matter. IDW Optimus doesn't fulfill the fandom's fantasies of Father Figure or Perfect Cultural Icon or Twinky Fucktoy and since that's the only reason most people care about Optimus in general, the fandom collectively trashes on IDW OP.
All because he can't fit into the overly simplified and childlike double standard the fandom has where if any other character is messy and flawed, that's good writing and interesting and compelling, but if OPTIMUS is messy and flawed, he's Literally The Worst and he's an asshole for no other reason than He Sucks, context be damned
#squiggposting#ive been here too long and seen the same shit too many times#i'm tired of going 'maybe it's just a difference in taste' nope#the issue is literally just double standards and people not reading the text or taking things out of context#and the worst part is if this were just something OP haters did i would get it#after all if you just dont like OP then of course you arent gonna find anything interesting or compelling#but i see this shit from literally other MOP fans who supposedly love M and OP#but their OP takes are shit and i can count the no. of people who write IDW OP on one hand#i kind of thought that at least among other OP fans there would be deeper readings but if anything it's worse#fandom OP content is 50% haha funny dad jokes g1 knockoff OP and 50% yaoi uke twink sad baby OP#so unimaginative. so fucking boring. so immature#to style yourselves some sort of mature TF fans and then viciously reject the One OP who#dared to be written a little darker and more flawed than any others#it's literally just people refusing to give a chance to any nuanced take on OP#they just want him to be There and Nice and for his biggest flaw to be Being Annoying About Equality or something#might delete later might not
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˚୨୧⋆。˚ ⋆ Hello! I am back and out of art block(don't jinx it) and have some art of the Dancestors!
╰┈➤ AN: this is my first ever fan art. Yes, they got tumblr-ified. I know they did. Its very obvious favoritism.
: ̗̀➛ LOWBLOODS:
╰┈➤ idk I dislike how Damara and Rufioh came out. I just dislike it.
╰┈➤ I love Kankri. Is it obvious
: ̗̀➛ MIDBLOODS:
╰┈➤ I loooove how these came out!!! Least fav is Porrim, only bc she looks so similar to her sprite that it looks traced sob
╰┈➤ got creative w/ Araneas pose because I love love love her design
: ̗̀➛ HIGHBLOODS:
╰┈➤ okay Horuss is crossed out because I’m embarrassed to post him. It’s that bad
╰┈➤ my least favorite designs out of all of these, honestly. They were very rushed
╰┈➤ If I had to pick a favorite I’d say Kurloz.
╰┈➤ they’re good I think I just should’ve put more time into this
╰┈➤ listen. I forgot to put the lil image next to them and forgot I was also posting this on an sfw account so ignore the immaturity next to horuss zahhak
༊*·˚ ~ ♣︎・♥︎・♦︎・♣︎・→ Goodbye!
#damara megido#rufioh nitram#mituna captor#kankri vantas#meulin leijon#porrim maryam#latula pyrope#aranea serket#horuss zahhak#cronus ampora#meenah peixes#homestuck#dancestors#my design#my artwork#literallyrudy#literallyrudy art#wait how many tags can I put#i know its not unlimited but what how many can I put#i love homestuck#transgender#gay#lgbt pride#its not even pride month yet that's sad#i think mituna is annoying im not sorry#thats it im done with the random tags bye its late im tired
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sorry for
the lack of new art, I’ve been kinda depressed and pretty lonely lmao
#The bad times are coming back I think#Falling into that familiar hole again#Lmao#vent ig#idk man im tired#so freaking tired lately#Anyways sorry#lol#I feel so annoying#Like every time I message someone#I’m a nuisance#And that people just sorta put up with me#Idk#just sad
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of course I overshared again because I apparently can't keep my mouth shut whenever someone's there to listen
#vent#venting#depressing shit#i'm sad#vent blog#mentally tired#mentally fucked#anxienty#i'm annoying#i hate my self#mentally unstable#mentally drained#oversharing
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Looking at my latest post, I'm starting to feel like that one friend from years ago was right, and that constantly updating my ref sheets is just going to annoy people. I've always loved drawing new versions and looking back at the previous iterations to see how far the characters have come, but I haven't considered that maybe it just gets too repetitive for others to care. Perhaps silent updates just to keep the character bio post up to date is the way to go? At least then I'd avoid the disappointment of having the new posts go out with a whimper...
#trying not to let it get to me but man#it's hard#i do all of this primarily for myself but i always love hearing feedback so situations like this make me a little sad#and it doesn't help that i feel like i'm so annoying about my au when talking to friends that they've also grown tired of it#ehh#gekko.txt
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Entering depressed dreamty wave era of the month, I’ll excuse myself for being moody, I randomly feel like crying on the floor.
#so uh you know when you realize you have a patern and smell that you’re approaching a period where you’ll feel extremely low ?#that me rn#I’m starting to feel weird and i’m self aware enough to know that mean I’m slowly falling under a wave of negative feelings and that at any#given moment I’ll be having an emotional meltdown#so like I’m feeling a bit sad but I know that soon i’ll feel BIG sad#kinda like seing the water dissapearing on a beach and knowing a tsunami approach#so I’ll excuse myself in advance for being emotionally tired and in general constantly sad#i know i’m very open on this blog about moments where I feel down#but I don’t want to be seen as ‘the girl who can’t shut up about being sad’#i can’t shut up in general#so i do end up not closing my mouth when feeling strong emotion of sadness#also i need a therapist but for personal reasons can’t get one#which sucks#am I trauma dumping here ? definetly#will I’ll probably delete this later out of shame ? surely#that a lot of tags because i don’t feel like saying this out loud on text#I think i’m annoying#most of the time I’m sure that I am#lacking self confidence suck#anyway#dreamty’s ramble#tw vent#vent
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my rage feels like a hot stone I can’t swallow, it’s stuck in my throat. my teeth trying to snap my tongue in half. I can feel my lungs fill with fire. stop me, before I burn this place down.
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