#Like every time I message someone
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sorry for
the lack of new art, I’ve been kinda depressed and pretty lonely lmao
#The bad times are coming back I think#Falling into that familiar hole again#Lmao#vent ig#idk man im tired#so freaking tired lately#Anyways sorry#lol#I feel so annoying#Like every time I message someone#I’m a nuisance#And that people just sorta put up with me#Idk#just sad
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You’ve just got this real magic, capturing the sunshine summer of childhood in the tiny Pines twins. Like I am fully convinced I could show the overcast sky one of your pictures of Stanley and the sky would be like. Pack it up clouds, time to get back to the sun.
Ohh thank you :(((((
#you’re all so lovely what#I cry every time someone sends me a “your art feels like-” message#I mean I cry any time anyone’s nice to me but STILL#Anyways here’s a doodle inspired by your description I hope it fits#thank you again 😭😭😭#my art#ask#gravity falls#Stan pines#Stanley pines#stanford pines#ford pines
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vexillology
[ID: Three panel "Pills that make you green" comic.
Panel 1: An ochre person with a triangle-shaped body is standing on a stage in front of a curtain.
Ochre: Hey everyone and thanks for showing up today. As you're all probably familiar there's been a lot of discussion about the green pride flag, and how lots of people in the community aren't really represented by it. And while there are a lot of flags for subcommunities we're really missing a unifying one
Panel 2: Ochre person pulls away the curtain, revealing literally just the regular real life Pride flag to the crowd of a variety of people with a skew towards a greenish majority
Ochre: So I'm going to suggest we use this rainbow flag, as a symbolic representation of the full color spectrum
Panel 3: Zoom in on the ochre person looking vaguely dejected, saying "oh..." as criticisms come in from the crowd:
"I feel that this does a poor job representing mauve people"
"Get better at vexilology" [sic]
"That looks so weird"
"There's barely even any of the original green flag left!"
"Way too complicated"
"Orange people don't even have anything to do with green rights"
"What's next, charred brown with lava cracks in it for refugees from Former Italy?"
End ID]
Start - Previous - Next
#before someone reads the opposite of the intended message: I don't agree with the critics.#the joke is that they're responding to the common real-life pride flag as if it's some weird new idea#like the discourse every time something gets added to the progress flag#pills that make you green#ptmyg
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Figured I'd try my hand at some Redacted character post/text edits!
[ 1 / ? ]
Credit to @/sainthowlzon for all the Listener icons, and to @/elisacaleisa for their google drive with all the canon icons!
(slightly alternative version of the Solaires' GC edit below the cut bc i had a lil too much fun with what Vincent would name his contacts)
#redacted audio#redacted asmr#redacted memes#redactedverse#redacted sam#redacted darlin#redacted vincent#redacted honey#redacted guy#redacted azmidi#redacted sweetie#oh ehehe their names rhyme that's cute#redacted david#redacted asher#redacted treasure#redacted porter#redacted alexis#redacted william#*slaps post* *flextape meme guy voice* now THAT's a lotta characters!#good Lord these were hard to figure out ALT text for. anyone more experienced with describing images feel free to lmk if i did it wrong#i'm trying to both give credit to the images source (when there even is one. text screenshots are usually source-less when i find them)#And to explain what the original images said. And how I edited them. And who's speaking in what message and aaaaaaa ...i Tried#breaking away from my old style of edits by actually changing the OP's handles to suit the characters. but i'm not creative enough to think#-of cool ones so it's just gonna be their names most of the time probably lmao. but i'll leave the original ones unedited if they happen-#-to fit like the Darlin' one did. and sometimes there Is no handle/url in the image to begin with so. i'm playing it by ear#still gonna put credit to the OPs in the ALT text when i can tho. anyways. that's enough overanalyzing meme edits for one night#i spent way too much time on these so i sure do hope that some of y'all find them funny#and as usual with these kinda edits i really hope i'm not accidentally making any that have been done before!#if i ever make a duplicate of someone else's i swear its not intentional i just dont have time to scour the fandom for every existing edit#also i know that's not how iMessages are formatted but i had to find a way to make it clear who's POV we're seeing the convo from so yeah
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😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i cant believe someones mad that i make rules for my own blog and i enforce them.
like??? i write PORN. not even porn i write like coercive dark rape fantasies. its bad shit yall it aint for kids! im sorry i dont like the idea of 15 year olds reading porn that I've written😭😭😭😭😭
#k but at the same time this person made three different posts about me#kinda flattering ngl ty bestie ily#the funniest thing is that minors/ageless blogs can have have gotten away with interacting with me#i dont check every like#follow#reblog#but if you message me/leave an ask ya i will check those bios#there was a 17 year old who put their age in their bio and was following me for MONTHS before someone thankfully told me about it
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u know when youre bored of everything and it feels like theres a hole that youre trying to close but it just keeps sucking everything up
#pissing me thefuck OFF#Ive tried everything ive gone for swims ive eaten snacks and drank water I went for a walk#every time I pick smth up it jumps to smth else like some sort of itch I cant scratch#and stuff that doesnt take a lot of energy like going thru pinterest reading old messages playing Tetris#I haven’t even listened to music in almost 2 weeks wtf. I cant sleep#I wanna talk to ppl but smths stopping me like I get exhausted before I can even come up with smth to say#like oh I have free time I should try this game someone recommended me its already on my ds but I cant even get past the menu#is this some sort of creative block or smth. sigh#maybe i wanna play with someone but it feels like a huge list of tasks and commitments that I can’t keep up with#and I don’t want the other person to have to read between the lines being wishy washy abt it even though I asked to play#yapping#diary#ffffffuuuck
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omgggg shipping is not arophobic in the LEAST but keep making us look like whiners with no real problems by continuing to complain about it I guess
yeah that's definitely what i said in any post ever man great job
average person who has made shipping their entire identity will see a post where someone says 'hey please don't say these specific types of things that are degrading and cruel about nonromantic relationships while enjoying your ships and maybe examine the thought processes and beliefs and prejudices that led to saying them' and be like 'oh so you're a whiner with no real problems who thinks shipping is arophobic?'
telling on yourself there bud
#gav gab#lmaoooooooo#gav answers#i feel like my brain ghosts would have a much harder time with this if i didn't already like#obsessively couch every single comment i made about shipping and arophobia and amatonormativity#with a million disclaimers about how everyone is allowed to do what they want and enjoy what they enjoy#implying this comes from a fellow aro person is like#unfortunately not hard to accept bc i have seen a Lot of aro people who love shipping#also fall down the same logic traps#of people's behaviour when shipping can Never be questioned or criticized bc shipping is sacrosanct#bc they feel like#idk particularly self conscious about engaging in arophobic behaviour when shipping#ive noticed that like people who make shipping their entire fandom identity have a VERY LOW distress tolerance#for someone even so much as not also approaching fandom that way#and watching them freak out at the mere suggestion that it's possible for someone to#ever so gently suggest maybe the way they talk about this affects other people#and 'but my ships' isn't a blanket justification to say whatever you want forever about relationships and love and feelings#and devotion and whatever else and how Friends Don't Look At Friends Like That!!11!111!!!!!#bc it's Not That Deep and It's Just A Joke Calm Down and Ship And Let Ship!!!!!!!#is like. well. skill issue. i am so uncomfortable in fandom spaces all the time lmao you couldn't survive in my shoes#imagine being so selfish and incapable of handling people having different experiences that you hear like#the mildest critique of your behaviour and go so far off the rails you send shit like This#is this take for real 'it's not possible for any shipping related behaviour to be arophobic' bc if so uh. Uh#shipping related behaviour is not immune from critque about but not limited to#misogyny homophobia racism arophobia etc etc you do actually have to care abt other people#even when youre making your barbies kiss. sorry!#i see a notification on my inbox and i get excited to see a message. maybe it's about one of my fics or smth!#no. it is this asshole.
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This is such a harmful sentiment to push considering that you don’t necessarily have to be “attractive,” (beauty is subjective, yada yada) in order for men to want to harm you in the slightest… like man, what…
#the lady talks about being followed and harassed and so on as if every woman and girl in the world regardless of their age and#‘good looks’#hasn’t experienced this and will continue to#I hate when these girls especially ones who are conveniently attractive talk about stuff like this under the guise of speaking for all#women while x-ing out most women#this easily leads into the realm of ‘you’re too ugly/fat to be assaulted ANYWAY-‘#talk that I see spread by misogynists and bird brained women like it’s such a natural thing to even say it’s actually rly scary#especially when it comes to the assault shit which is usually about power and control anyway#they don’t care what you look like#you could be covered up head to toe and someone would try to hurt you just because#I hate when women like this go online thinking that they said something open their mouths I really do#rambling#tw assault#got dudes in the comments going ‘she’s not even pretty anyway she’s like a 4 out of 10’#completely missing the message (as if they care) and see#these are the kinds of people that stuff like this attracts#stuff like this coming out of a woman’s mouth especially is so dangerous#I don’t think I’m the most good looking person in the world and I’ve been followed sm times I had to run away from a guy once and luckily#my bus was right fucking there!!!#then the guy who was harassing me years ago at a bus stop and forced me to hug him and touched my butt and no one else was around to help#me…#and he kept on trying to get me to go back to his apartment around the corner like that was so#the man who followed me into the store as I was shopping and I noticed that he kept on staring at me#then tried to holla and he looked way older than me and I think he was a pastor or something too he had a nice car and tried to get me to#come with him#sm more incidents over the years like this is crazy pls don’t say stuff like this and act like it’s normal#someone in the comments said that people like the woman in the video think that being pretty will free them from the patriarchy and like…#YEAH 😭#it’s so obvious too lmfao#these be the same women calling themselves ‘girls girls’’
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if nothing else this cookbook thing has proven that my social anxiety is way worse than i thought because why am i kicking screaming crying killing myself over dming people on tumblr dot com
#the way im quadrouple checking that ive got the right recipe every time#because for some reason the idea of messaging someone about the wrong one is like life ruining to me#i would just have to die on the spot#as if it isnt as easy as just going. oops sorry i meant this one
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long!!! distance!!!! sucks!!!!!!
#I have no idea how long distance couples survive#I'm losing my mind over my squish being so far away#wdym I can't hug them :(#wdym there's a whole ass month left until they come back????#and like. I wanna text and call them so often but I'm scared of being too much yk#but equally it's been a week since I last heard their voice and I'm going insane#I also hate the time difference!!!!!! there's like a three hour window in which we both MIGHT be free but it's hard to coordinate :(#I just. I've never missed someone this much before#I imagine being reunited almost every day#sigh#also kinda scared about the fact that we're going to go from not having seen each other for 3 months to LIVING TOGETHER#I'm really hyped don't get me wrong#but also. aaaaaaa#(post inspired by the fact that they haven't messaged me back yet despite it being only 9am for them lol)#me? clingy? haha whaaaaaat nooooo#comso rambles#queerplatonic yearning hours#qpr yearning#queerplatonic#aroace#long distance love
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Okay hi I've been wanting to be friends with a few of u on here but I'm going to be extremely not normal for a while (major life event (negative) + having to move back to california (negative again)). Apologies in advance and feel free to kill me with a rock if you'd like
#im still gonna try to message people on here but holy shit every time i dm someone i look back at the dm & want to blow myself with bombs#i know this is also weird to say but i can clarify maybe. eventually#idk how to be normal i feel like everything i say is strange or offputting bc ive only talked to like 3 people for the last few years#ive gotten so so so bad at being a person who can interact with strangers and make friends
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good lord, eon mentioned in 2024
(sudden flood of comments of people recognizing Eon/Eona in my inbox)
Well! Guess that duology wasn't as obscure as I thought! Never actually met other people who had read them, lmao.
Full disclosure that I haven't read those books in like... good lord, 15+ years at this point. I do remember it having some super uncomfortable plot points, especially when it comes to Eona's romantic relationships.
I would explicitly tell any minors 16 and below to steer clear of Eon/Eona, for that reason. There are some VERY heavily sexual topics in this book, along with extreme ableism and misogyny. A baby is also killed on screen as part of a coup.
(Also prepare for very messy 2000s depictions of queerness. And an ending that is very abrupt.)
#Eon/Eona#Bone babble#I only remember the overall plot and weirdly specific details about Eon/Eona#I remember this one part so clearly where Eona is coaxed into trading her thick jacket for a finely woven silk one#And then she gets out into snow and she's like 'IM SUCH AN IDIOT. WHY DID I LET HER CONVINCE ME TO WEAR THIS FLIMSY NAPKIN'#I think about it every time I get talked out of dressing warm because 'oooo you're gonna be too hot. Oooo this coat is better made'#Incredible the way that the worst messages of a book can roll off someone if they're aware of them#But you will remember Silk Coat Snow for the rest of your life
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you are complaining about complaining too much while complaining about the fact that maybe people dont like you because you complain too much while complaining about being alone. just stop complaining and do something about it. talk to people. reach out. dont just wait for someone to come to you first.
i have tried reaching out to different people in the past year or so but it never works. i understand its my own fault for letting relationships decay because of my own insecurities and issues but that doesn't mean i can just will myself to think or believe different things about myself. it's a self fulfilling prophecy ; i think people don't like me so i don't reach out so people don't like me etc . i am sure you do not want to hear me list all the things i want to say in response so i will put them in the tags.
#every time i try to reach out or talk to someone it goes nowhere. i dont have any social skills anymore and have no clue how to keep a#conversation going. half the time even when i do people stop replying to me. which is fine theydont owe me a reply but still feels likeshit#when i tried to make one new irl friend it just didn't work because they have better options for friends. we spoke occasionally but never#messaged online like ever and would only talk when we happened to be in the same place. i tried multiple times to organize a time to hangou#none of which came to pass. i dont understand why this one didn't work because i thought this person was interested in being my friend but#i guess i was wrong or thought they were more interested than they really were.#i have a problem with reaching out anyway which has been a problem i have had since i was like 11. reaching out to people first doesnt come#easily to me - in the beginning when i was a lot younger i didn't want to bother people with my presence & thought if i were to come to#someone first they would feel pressured into talking to me when they didn't want to. this is stupid of course. but has still not left me as#something i feel is very core to the way i act today. waiting for someone to come to me first feels like my only option because i do not#know how to reach out effectively (my evidence being i have failed every time i have tried) & i am convinced people dont like me in the#first place and do not want me to approach them.#i dont really even know who to reach out to in the first place. my world is extremely narrow. the number of people i know has shrunk#significantly and my standing in their eyes collectively has also shrunk significantly in the past few years. i feel like every person i#was once friends with wants nothing to do with me. i feel as if i have burned every bridge possible.#when it comes to the fact i complain all the time . which i know of course is annoying. its because i cant find any kind of joy in anything#i do or see or whatever. nothing makes me happy - i only see things to complain about. all stimulus seems grating and the world seems#specifically catered to make me miserable. all i can really do is complain. i treat this blog like a stream of consciousness and when most#of that consciousness is occupied with how much i hate being alive the blog will mostly be complaining. its a vicious cycle lol .#anyway . i guess the key theme is low self esteem begets low self esteem in many ways. mental illness begets mental illness.#i am not really saying this to anyone least of all to you anon. i just felt compelled to recount i guess for myself the reasons that came#to mind for why i am like this. i am talking to myself here
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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(crashes flaming into your dms) BEHOLD, AN PLATONIC FRIEND WHO ALSO LIKES SOME KINKY SHIT!
YOU DON'T HAVE TO RESPOND OR BE FRIENDS IF YOU DON'T WANT TO!
I love making new friends come say hiiii <3 ^_^ but YEAH PLEASE DONT BE LIKE THIS GUY
#I haven’t been made to feel so uncomfy by someone in a long long time .#way too pushy#all of this borderline spamming made me so incredibly exhausted that I couldn’t even bring myself to reply#every time he messaged me trying to get me to talk to him. he made me more uncomfy than before and got further away from his goal#it felt like interacting with this guy was just a chore. pretty sure he had my post notifications on as well so he ran to message me when I#got online#my asks
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EVERYBODY SHUT UP!!!!!! PAT SIELOFF IS PREGNANT!!!!!
1. Birthday cake from Sierra and Kelly; 2. Gritty soft serve ice cream cup; 3. Sign for Erik Johnson's 1k celebration; 4. Jersey Devil Christmas tree ornament.
#just got taken very off guard by a big room remix of mozart's lacrimosa and the experience did NOT spark joy#horrible. i keep going back to the playlist it was on and listening to 30 seconds and getting mad all over again#not bc i believe in the sanctity of lacrimosa but bc i don't like it#ko and sierra aren't responding to my messages probably because they are spending quality time with family!!#but EYE do not have quality time with family. and my brain is swiss cheese from too much church#please god let him be a girl dad do not let him have a boy to put into hockey#i mean you can put the girl in hockey but we do NOT need pat sieloff jr (boy) into hockey#pat sieloff continuing proof that every single bone in your body can be broken and you have like negative muscle ligaments#but you can still be so so so so cute and happy with your wife in pictures announcing baby sieloff 🥰🥰#the weather is making me UNWELL. like physically i was not built for this weather i was built for heat not cold#BUT mentally also. please explain to me why i outlined an entire advent liturgy -- all four sundays -- based around hockey#LIKE NOBODY NEEDS A PRAYER OF CONFESSION AROUND HOCKEY#and it fucking WHIPS is the worst part. it was only an outline but if i spent more than 3 hours on it. well someone should a do wellness ch#ck is what should happen. we don't need hockey liturgy no one needs that#the thing is i am so fucking burnt out and just exhausted by all of it (<- what christmas/advent will do to a mfer) but i love#writing liturgy. it's so fun. it's like creative nonfiction#so then i was like well what if i did lent and baseball. which tracks much better yk ending the darkness and the coming light#and then i was like. interesting. what urgent tasks am i avoiding by doing all this. what medication am i not taking#white knuckling it ONE DAY LEFT OF CHURCH NONSENSE AND THEN I CAN ROT IN MY LIVING ROOM FOR THE REST OF THE YEAR#oh my god is it past midnight already i've been working on this post for like two hours and keep getting distracted#if the classical music station played ''mozart's final rave (lacrimosa)'' by oliver heldens at 7am i would certainly get out of bed :/#fresno oilers.txt
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