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comatosebunny09 · 7 days ago

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— cw: adult content, cheating, shitty fiancé, self-indulgent madness, mdni — notes: i can’t sleep, and @alfredosaws got the gears turning in my head. sorry if this isn’t your jam. i was horny and needed to torture myself. — now playing: see through - amelia moore

Imagine Sylus as your real estate agent, showing you and your fiancé around a potential home.

Your fiancé doesn’t seem too interested, busy typing away on his phone or occasionally stepping out to answer phone calls. You titter nervously, explaining to Sylus with a wry smile that your fiancé is a very busy man.

Still, Sylus continues showing you the rest of the house, pointing out parts that would appeal primarily to you.

“You see here? The master bedroom contains an en-suite bathroom with enough counter space to house all your skincare products. ”

“The bathtub has jets. Perfect for when you want to unwind after a long day on your feet. You look like you shoulder the world. You deserve to take a load off with a warm, soothing bath.”

“The sunroom would be great for your plants. You look like you have quite a green thumb. You strike me as a cultivator. A nurturer. Someone who should learn to sit down from time to time.”

“The counter space in the kitchen is immaculate. Perfect for when the love of your life wants to cook breakfast or have you for dessert.”

He’s so very flattering and handsome, and you find yourself falling prey to his charms. You rein yourself in when your fiancé returns, still as detached about the house as ever. You ask him for his opinion, to which he shrugs you off and remarks that he’s happy if you’re happy. Conveniently, his phone rings again, and he walks outside to take the call.

Sylus gives you a pitying look as if he knows there’s trouble in paradise. You smile awkwardly to dispel his worries.

Sure, your fiancé isn’t always present in your relationship. And maybe you agreed to his proposal out of fear, thinking you would lose out on your white picket fence if you refused him. But, who are you kidding? You haven’t felt like yourself in years. Haven’t genuinely smiled in a very long time, and your fiancé hasn’t helped improve your self-esteem, nitpicking when you’re a little bloated or leave the house without makeup.

You’ve recently caught him entertaining other women on his socials, and he would quickly gaslight you, exclaiming that you were looking for reasons to be upset. Deep down, you know he isn’t good for you, and you deserve better, but a sick part of you believes he is your punishment for some crimes you might’ve committed in a past life.

Sylus has read you like a book, and you’ve only worked with him for two months. You feel more comfortable in his presence than the man you’re about to marry, having known him much longer.

“Come with me, sweetheart,” says Sylus, his voice a sweet, sticky dolce as he takes your hand into his larger one.

He guides you up the spiraling staircase towards the main bedroom and lures you into the massive walk-in closet. And when you’re swathed in the darkness after he shuts the door behind you, he backs you up against a wall, your breaths intermingling whilst his mouth hovers over yours.

“You poor thing,” he whispers next to your ear, the hairs scattered across your body standing on end, pleasant tingles ricocheting through your extremities. He takes your hand in his, pressing it against the cool, textured wall overhead, tenderly twining your fingers together. “That Narcissist doesn’t deserve you, now does he?” His lips graze yours, the sensation making your legs tremble like a fawn.

“I can see it in your eyes.” A weighted palm smooths over your side, a devastatingly powerful knee sliding between the fat of your thighs, pilfering the breath from your lungs. He touches you with a reverence you’ve never known. “You don’t love him, do you? Not when I can touch you like this.”

He takes possession of your jaw, breathing hot and open-mouthed against your lips, nuzzling your noses together. And you’re dizzy, the closet suddenly feeling so cramped, and the warmth of his body permeating through the layers of your clothes. “You’re so beautiful. You deserve so much more. I can give you so much more. May I kiss you, sweetling?”

Despite the voice screaming somewhere far off in your mind that this is very much wrong, you find yourself nodding sluggishly in the darkness as if he can see you slowly turning to putty in his palms. He chuckles, the vibrations of it making your tummy flutter like you’re cresting down a hill.

Wordlessly, he pans in, startling you with a gentle kiss at first. Something deft and ghostly, so soft you wouldn’t believe it happened. When you make a gentle keen of protest after he pulls way, he takes that as his cue to kiss you again, this time more firm and full-bodied, the rigid pane of his body slowly anchoring you to the wall.

Your unoccupied hand slides over his spine, concluding its excursion at the small of his back, and he’s strong here. Sturdy as if he could lift you one-handed if he so pleases. The idea makes you whimper, and he swallows the pretty little noises he invokes, his sweltering tongue pushing into your mouth to map out every ridge and crevice.

He slips a warm, weighted palm into the crook of your knee, drawing your thigh up to rest on his hip. And, with this new angle, he presses fully against you, the stitching of his slacks scraping pleasantly over the inner cut of your thigh. He releases your hand once moored to the wall to hoist you into his arms, one of your heels clattering to the floor. Ten shaky fingers bury themselves in his hair, sifting through tufts of soft white to draw him ever closer to deepen your lip-lock.

Despite the spacious closet, it’s growing uncomfortably warm. Too many clothes are in the way, so you tug his shirt from his slacks. Your fingers blindly scramble over his shirt buttons, eager to feel the smooth, supple glide of his skin beneath them. He chuckles something throaty and enrapturing, kissing you velvet-soft as his desire awakens to press against your thigh.

“So eager, aren’t you?” he husks, breaking away from your lips with a sticky click to blister your jaw and carotid with languorous kisses. “Has he ever touched you like this? Kissed you like this?”

You crane your head back, your skull lightly thudding against the wall behind you. Your lashes shutter. The feeling of his mouth dragging over your skin and his weighted body nestled between your thighs is too much and yet not enough. You cling to his back, your grip white-knuckled, mouth parted slightly with wanton pleas for more more more.

But before he can grant your request, your fiancé’s voice beckons to you through the empty, sturdy walls of the house. The spell that befell you disperses, reality careening in. You push against Sylus’ lean chest with the heel of your palm, panting and gasping, squirming to be let down. Sylus reluctantly heeds you, gently setting you onto your feet.

He helps you slide back into your discarded heel, kissing your ankle on his way back up, and you try to ignore how your body burns like an inferno at the attention. It takes all of you not to snatch him towards you once more, to kiss him and demand he take you, right then and there, with your fiancé calling for you downstairs. But, as much as it pains you, you feel remorse for how far you already let things go.

Fixing your clothes and hair to some semblance of neatness in the darkness, the pair of you exit the closet. You don a rehearsed smile, answering your fiancé that you’ll be right down. Searing, slender fingers encircle your wrist before you can descend the stairs. You acknowledge Sylus with a look over your shoulder. He fixes you with a feverish stare that burns like a flame, revealing a deep desire for you. And the realization shoots straight to your center as his mouth draws into an unflinching line.

Something in your chest pinches and pulls. And for a moment, you consider what your life would be like if you’d given yourself more credit and granted yourself a little more grace. But you brush away your thoughts, fixing Sylus with an unconvincing smile before pulling away from him to descend the stairs into the arms of your loving, soon-to-be husband.

#sylus x reader #sylus x you #tw: cheating #self indulgent #musing #ovulating #and angsty af

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celestelunia · 5 months ago

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Yk what would be sad. A Vil x GN!reader who keeps changing themselves because Vil keeps insulting everything about them (not on purpose) but he doesn’t realize what’s happening until they just stop talking to him all together because being with him hurts them too much. Nice ending maybe? (I’m a baby and can’t handle angst endings😭)

Hi! So sorry this took a while! Hope you've been well!

First time writing for Vil, but I tried my best lol. Hope you like it!

TW: self-esteem/image issues

"Straighten up"

"That color doesn't look good on you. Try something ligther."

"Hm. That clothing style isn't right. This just won't do."

"No. No. No. It's all wrong."

As you walked down the halls of NRC, you kept a couple of style magazines pushed up against your chest as your once bright eyes seemed darker and less happy.

Vil Schoenheit was someone you always admired, and when you were able to become a part of the rare few people who he considered a friend, you couldn't have been happier. You knew being next to someone like Vil wasn't going to be easier, but you never expected something on this level.

At first, it started with little words of improvement. Ones that you gladly took to help improve yourself, but over time, that's all you heard. Negative words on how you could do better. Look better. Nothing was very good enough, and now it was starting to ware you down. Suddenly, it felt like Vil was saying "you" weren't good enough.

At that thought, you came to a stop as you looked down at the magazines in your hands. It was all too much, and it was getting to the point that you couldn't even look at yourself in the mirror anymore. With a sigh, you turned and walked towards the nearest trash bin before you threw away the very magazines that had become your life.

A month had passed, and Vil was starting to wonder what was going on with you. You had slowly stopped coming by his room, attending meetings, and just having lunch together. At first, he figured it was because you got busy since he understood time restrictions and all, but after a couple of weeks, he felt like something was off.

The few times Vil saw you in the hallways the moment you caught his gaze, the model watched as you would turn and head in the opposite direction. It almost felt like you were avoiding him, but that couldn't be right?

......could it?

Over the last couple of weeks, you felt like you could breathe again, but despite that, you didn't feel happy. You couldn't bring yourself to talk to Vil, so you did the next best thing you could think of.

You avoided him.

And that alone was painful. You missed his voice, his company, and when you saw that look of surprise in his eyes when you obviously avoided him cause pain to shoot through your chest.

Despite all of these feelings, you knew the relationship you had with Vil wasn't healthy. You couldn't constantly keep up with his approval, and you wanted him to accept you for who you were.

Faults and all.

"Y/N."

Hearing the very voice you were thinking of calling out your name caused you to freeze. In that small moment, your fight or flight senses went off, but before you could make up your mind, you felt Vil grab your hand.

"Do you have a moment? I need to talk with you." Vil asked as he had noticed that look in your eyes that you might run, so he did his best to cut off your options to do so.

You paused as you considered his question. While you weren't ready to talk about this, you got the feeling you never would be, so you decided to just nod your head as the popular model led you towards his room for some privacy.

Once alone in Vil's room, you glanced around the familiar setting and scent.

"What's going on?" Vil asked, getting to the point.

At the question, you turned to look back at him without answering the question. You could feel that nasty and unpleasant bubble building up in the center of your chest. Did he really not know?

"You've been avoiding me, and I think it's only fair that you explain why." Vil said in his usual confidence.

Feeling that tightness in your chest, you wrapped your arms around yourself as you lowered your head.

"Y/N, if you slouch like that, it will be bad for-" Vil had started to say but stopped when he heard you mutter something. "Speak up. Muttering is very unbecoming."

"This!" You snapped, which caused the blonde to jump as he was startled by your sudden outburst. "The constant complaining and everything!"

Vil froze as he watched your beautiful [colored] eyes glare at him as fresh tears welled up in them.

"I'll never be good enough for you! Why can't you just accept me for who I am? I can't keep being with you as you constantly put me down!"

"Putting you down? I-" Vil said, surprised, but his words got cut off in his throat when he watched you storm over towards him.

"Maybe think a bit harder before you finish that sentence." You said as you told yourself you wouldn't apologize for getting your feelings out. "Not everyone is perfect, Vil. Not everyone can be like you....."

The model just started at you for a moment, but before he could speak, he watched as you walked past him and out of the room. Now alone, Vil just frowned. He had never seen you like this before, and your words echoed in his head.

He didn't put you down. He would never do something like that to you....right? You were the only person (outside of Rook) who he could be himself around. He adored your company...

Taking a deep breath, Vil left his room as he headed towards his vice housewarden room. If anyone could help him right now, it would be Rook.

The next day, you decided not to go to classes as you stayed crawled up on your bed. While you did feel better getting your feelings out, you felt sad at the fact that you might lose your friendship with Vil.

It was weird how the world "friendship" had changed for you over time as you started to notice a change in your feelings, but it wasn't something you were ready to drive into it.

Hearing a knock on your door, you let out a moan as you pulled your blankets over your head. "Go away." You called out as you figured it was one of your friends checking up on you. After a couple of seconds of silence, you thought they had left, but instead, you heard your door open. Holding back another groan, you kept yourself hidden, hoping your friend would get the message that you weren't in the mood to talk.

"Staying in and resting is important."

Instead of your friends voice, you heard Vil's as you suddenly sat up in your bed and removed the blanket from your head.

Standing in the room was Vil as he closed the door behind him.

"What are you doing here?" You ask as even you could hear the coldness in your tone.

"I came to talk." Vil said as he just smiled softly. "And to apologize."

At this, you gripped the blanket that was resting in your lap. Vil apologizing? That didn't sound right.

Noticing that you weren't moving to kick him out, Vil decided to continue. "I want to apologize for my words. I know it's not an excuse, but I didn't even notice I was saying those....things to you. Or how often."

While Vil was a proud man, he also wasn't that proud to lose someone important to him due to his own mistakes. After talking with Rook, he finally had a good understanding of how he had been treating you. "Perfection..." Vil said with a sigh as he looked off to the side of your room. "...is something that has been pushed on me since a young age, and it appears I've picked up a rather nasty habit. I never meant for my words to make you think you weren't good enough." He said as he walked over towards your bed and took a seat on the side of it. "You're already perfect enough. Just knowing I can be myself around you and knowing you won't judge my imperfections..." Vil said as he reached out and placed his hand over yours that was gripping your blanket.

"...It means the world to me, and I'm sorry for making you feel like you weren't good enough. I understand if you don't want to be around me anymore, but I wanted you to know I never once thought you weren't good enough."

At Vil's words, your eyes widen before you glance down at his hand resting over yours. It was like a weight had been lifted from your chest. "It hurt..." You whispered as you closed your eyes. "I just want to be with you and not to embarrass yo-"

Before you could finish your sentence, you felt Vil gently hand on the back of your head as he slowly pulled you forward into an embrace.

"You've never embarrassed me. I was just wanting what was best for you, and that ended up turning into nagging stepmother's territory." Vil said with a small smile as he tried to lighten the mood. "And I'm sorry I hurt you...."

With your forehead resting against Vil's chest, you let out a long sigh as you took in his warmth. Something about his scent and being next to him always helped you to relax.

"Do you forgive me?" The model asked bearly above a whisper. The longer the silence went, the more he was starting to worry you wouldn't.

"I do...." You said before pulling back to look at Vil. "...but I hold the right to punish you if you make me feel like this again." You said with a playful smile.

"Deal." Vil replied as he mirrored your smile. "I've already spoken with Rook, and I plan on being more mindful. I don't make the same mistake twice."

Taking in a deep breath, you nodded your head.

"Now." Vil said as he suddenly stood up from your bed. "I've cleared my schedule for the rest of the day. How about we watch a movie and catch up a bit?" He asked before holding out his hand to you.

Surprised that Vil cleared HIS schedule for you made that familiar warmth spread through your chest again as you smiled. How you've missed it. "Who am I to turn you down?" You teased softly as you reached out and placed your hand in his.

#twisted wonderland #disney twst #twst wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #x reader #twst #twst x reader #vil schoenheit #twst vil

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theonceandfuturequeenoftarts · 3 months ago

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Tom catches Evans trying to sneak into the Restricted Section for the third time that week a couple days later.

He knocks on the door frame – the element of surprise did him no favours last time – and leans against it casually. “Hard at work, Evans?”

Evans looks up at him with a glare that could strip paint, before turning the glare back to his book.

“It must be serious, to demand so much of your focus.”

No response.

“Perhaps I can help you with your research,” he offers. “I’m quite good at it.”

“What do you want, Riddle.” From the frustrated tone to the tense body language, it’s clear this is not really a question. More of a muggle sirens-and-lights warning.

“Why are you so convinced that I want something from you?”

“You’re a Slytherin, of course you want something.”

Tom doesn’t bother to point out that Evans is also a Slytherin; he gets the sense it’s a sore spot.

“And yet you don’t exhibit such scorn for either Malfoy or Black. What makes me so deserving of your suspicion?”

Evans snorts. “Those two couldn’t disguise what they’re really after if their lives depended on it. And neither of them is trying to get into my pants.”

“Well, more fool them.”

Evans sputters, flushing up to his ears.

“Piss off, Riddle!” The boy stands up, flinging the book closed (time magic, Tom notes – something to consider later) and almost falling over in his rush to leave as he gets tangled in his chair.

Tom darts a hand out and grabs onto Evans’ wrist before he can escape.

He narrows his eyes and considers the evidence. It’s a disproportionate reaction to an innocuously flirtatious comment. Tonight's efforts to take Evans to bed (or the table, or against the wall – he’s not picky) might be a wash, but perhaps he can learn something to improve his chances in the future.

“What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong?” Evans scoffs, looking increasingly distraught. “Everything’s wrong! And you being weird doesn’t help.”

“Weird?” Tom says, a little offended. “If my advances are unwanted, just say the word, but there’s nothing weird–”

“Stop playing with me!”

“Why do you think I’m playing with you?”

Evans snorts derisively. “As if someone like you would be interested in someone like me.”

That brings Tom up short. Is something so trivial the only obstacle?

“Do you think so little of yourself?”

“My self-esteem is neither here nor there,” Evans says irritably. “And jesus, how big is your ego – I don’t want you, so there must be something wrong with me?”

“I didn’t say that. What did you mean by ‘someone like you’ and ‘someone like me,’ then?”

“I’m a nobody, Riddle,” Evans says after a brief pause. “No fortune to speak of, no connections in high places, no real future prospects. There’s nothing exceptional about me. And you,” he hesitates, weighing his words. “You are exceptional – you would accept nothing less for or from yourself. People expect great things from you, and I have no doubt you could achieve them.”

The boy looks straight into his eyes. “But I do doubt your ability to tell the difference between ‘great’ and ‘terrible.’”

Tom feels a shiver slide down his spine, his breath catching in his throat. He wants to peel Evans open and find out what he knows, why he thinks that, who the hell he thinks he is to say such a thing to him. At the same time, Tom wants to get as far away from the suddenly strange boy, and that’s far more manageable at the moment.

He casts a quick obliviate and returns to his dorm. Sleep is long in coming to Tom that night.

(Tom Riddle’s Guide to Repeatedly Failing to Get Laid in the Restricted Section)

#harry potter #tom riddle #tomarry #gratuitous use of obliviate #why deal with the consequences of your actions when you can make the other person forget it even happened #time travel #tom being a creep #harry is 1000% done #fic snippet

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teaaleefs · 1 year ago

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Second Best - K. Bakugou

word count: 1746

pairing: 3rdyear!Bakugou x nb!reader

cw and notes: might be ooc because i’ve literally never written this guy before Hurt/Comfort, Cussing it’s bakugou idk what you expected. Soft bakugou, Hopefully i did it right tho- comparing yourself to others, jealousy, envy, low self esteem, pet names (baby), unedited asf good luck reading it because i certainly didn't, good ending :)

synopsis: you can't stop comparing yourself to your boyfriend and one day it just gets to you

Always second best. That’s what you were.

Second best to Katsuki since… Well, always. Your boyfriend always strove to be number one, always strove for perfection in everything. He was number one in class, the most promising student in class 1-A despite his rough and brash personality. But even then, he was the best at everything. Even things you told yourself you were good at.

Cooking? He could make your mom’s recipe almost exactly the same way she did, always fine tuning the details. But you? You always changed something up, always forgot a step. Too much salt, too little garlic, not enough pepper, forgot the vegetables… and despite being with him for some time - for nearly 3 years now - during your time in UA, you grew almost resentful.

At first you felt guilty, because why would you ever compare yourself to him? Why should you be upset that he’s doing well for himself? But the thought that you were always falling behind, always miles behind and him miles ahead, it bubbled up jealousy. You never acknowledged it when you were around him. You always acted normal, acted the same. Had your usual spats and squabbles with him, had your small dates with him and exchanged vulnerable words. But the feeling kept gnawing at you. Especially during finals, always during finals or big exams. You both would work your asses off. Hell, he even helped you to study the majority of the time.

Still, everytime you found that he was just better. Better at everything. Better with his quirk, better at studying, better at retaining information, better at testing, better at cooking your mother’s damn soup, better at planning dates, taking you out, getting gifts, better, better, better.

It left you upset late at night most times. Whenever you weren’t sleeping in his room your mind would whir with ways for you to improve - for you to catch up. And even when you were sleeping in his room, when he was already asleep you would still find yourself comparing and comparing and wishing you could just be better at one thing. Anything, just one thing.

Sometimes it made heat rise to your face when you would have these thoughts while looking over his sleeping form. His chest rose and fell with soft breaths while your eyes stung and burned and you tried to blink back your jealousy. Usually blinking them back and telling yourself to get over it did the trick. But one night it just didn’t. And you ended up wiping your eyes and turning away from him, settling into the pillow beneath your head and forcing yourself to fall asleep.

But this night wasn’t like the others and no matter what you just couldn’t bring yourself to sleep. Your eyes kept flooding full of tears just for you to keep wiping them away, just for you to keep quietly sniffling and hiccupping and for your mind to keep milling over your jealousy and underlying disappointment with yourself because it honestly wasn’t fair! You were trying just as hard as he was, but he was always more driven, always more something and tonight you couldn’t take it anymore.

He heard you before he saw you. Back turned to him, quiet sniffles filling the otherwise silent room save for the sound of the fan. Scooting closer to you, he wrapped his arms around your waist. He knew better than to ask - he knew you weren’t the type to say it outright.

“Oi, what’s wrong with you?” He asked anyway, his gruff voice having gone soft. It didn’t hold its usual snark or aggression, only a hint of the underlying concern he actually felt. When you didn’t answer, he sighed and held you tighter, letting his forehead rest against your shoulder.

You could feel light kisses brushing against your skin, murmured words of comfort that he normally wouldn’t utter. See, he was even better than you at comforting his loved ones. All you usually managed was an ‘it’ll be okay’ or a hug, feeling too awkward when it came to making others feel better. Your throat tightened as did your chest, the heel of your palms pressing against your eyes as you tried to will yourself to stop crying over nothing. To stop being a baby and a jealous little shit. There was no reason to cry from an outside standpoint. But here you were, silently balling your eyes out for no reason (that’s what you thought Katsuki might be thinking at least).

“It’s not fair.” You managed to choke out, words mumbled and muffled between a sharp intake of air.

His hands rubbed soothing circles against your skin, his hold on you never faltering, but his lips stopped their soft brushes against your shoulder. “What’s not fair?”

You fell silent again. Should you tell him? But that would be selfish, what if it caused him problems? No, realistically, he would hold back for no one. Not even you. but what if he decided that you were being dramatic? What if this lead to one of your usual tiffs over nothing? What if you really were just being a crybaby? What if, what if, what if he’s too good for you?

One of his hands abandoned your waist in favor of caressing your hair, rough fingers running through the strands all the way down, down, down to your neck and then back up again to the top in a calming fluid motion. “Breathe, baby. I can feel you tensing up.” He murmured against your ear, his rough voice growing increasingly softer.

You stiffened for a moment. You hadn’t even realized you were taking in shallow breaths, but now you were hyper aware of your breathing and how tight your chest felt. Nodding to show that you heard him, you drank in slow, deep breaths, holding them for a few seconds before releasing them.

You could hear him shifting behind you, both of his hands moving to cup your face. You could sense him hovering over you even as your hands stayed pressed to your eyes. You could feel the feather light kiss he pressed to your cheek and how quietly he asked you to move your hands. When you didn’t immediately comply, he gently encased his hands around your wrists, pulling your hands away himself.

Through bleary and wet eyes, you could make out the crease between his brows, his expression hardened into displeasure as he released your wrists. His displeasure wasn’t directed at you - never at you when you were like this.

He brushed the corner of your eyes free of tears with each thumb before pulling away. Settling back onto the bed and laying on his side, his warm hand brushed from your cheek to the back of your head, pulling you towards his chest. You let out a breath before you finally let yourself cry without holding it back; without the sniffling and bit back and choked sobs.

“Can you tell me what’s wrong?” He asked as he held you tight, chin resting atop your head.

You swallowed thickly, not wanting to tell him that you were crying because of him. It wouldn’t be fair and you had convinced yourself you were being childish. He let silence fall between you two, not wanting to push anymore when it was obvious that you weren’t going to say.

But that was fine. He was fine with just holding you tight and grazing his lips on your forehead. He held you for a while after that, murmuring sweet words into your ear, rubbing your back and hair and telling you that everything was okay, meanwhile you just couldn’t stop for the life of you comparing and wondering about how he’d react if you told him why you were crying.

Until eventually, you broke it down to him, blubbered and mumbled and choked words of explanation finally tumbling from your trembling lips. You told him about your jealousy, about the comparisons, how you felt he was miles ahead and you constantly fighting for a way to at least catch up. How he was just better, how you thought you were being silly and dramatic and that “there was no reason” for you to be crying like this - breaking down over this. How he felt out of your league, how he was just too good for you. But as soon as he heard you tell him all that he fell silent and that made your stomach drop. Was he silently agreeing with you? Did he also think you were being a crybaby? Childish? Dramatic–

He held you so tight you thought your bones might break. His head buried in the space between your neck and shoulder, he scolded you.

“Don’t fucking say shit like that.” He rasped, voice barely above a whisper, “There’s no way I’m out of your league. If I was, I wouldn't have dated you in the first place.” His words were honest and straightforward, blunt but needed. “Baby, you’re fine the way you are. Stop comparing yourself to me, it’s unfair to yourself.” He said before pressing the softest kiss to the corner of your eye, kissing away your plump tears. “We’re different people, of course things are gonna come differently to each of us.” He soothed as he pulled away to kiss the corner of your other eye. “There’s a lot of shit that you're better at than me, so give yourself some credit, baby.”

You managed a few soft noises of acknowledgement and muffled “okay’s”, taking in a few heaving breaths as you worked to calm down. He didn’t stop holding you, he didn’t stop muttering comforts to try and quiet your tears, didn’t stop telling you all the ways you had one upped him, even in the smallest of ways. He tried to show you that you had your own accomplishments, that even he couldn’t do it all - and that was the thing absolutely hated to admit, but he did it for you.

He didn’t stop holding you, his calloused fingers tracing soft patterns against your arm, not even as your breathing regulated and you sniffed here and there. Not even when you fell asleep against his chest, your fingers clutching onto his shirt in an attempt to keep him there. Not that he was moving anytime soon. He didn’t even let you go when he fell asleep too, his arms falling slack around you, but still there. Still resting against your waist, his legs tangled with yours and his face buried against your shoulder.

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abbyfmc · 5 months ago

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Plot Idea #6:

A yandere best friend has had a huge crush on (Y/n) since forever. She was a beautiful woman who worked at the same company as him and he often spent time with her, but he never confessed to her as he always considered himself a weak and useless boy. He grew up in a not-so-good home, which was the reason for his low self-esteem and poor self-perception.

His parents were abusive narcissists who ALWAYS demanded a lot from him in academic and extracurricular studies and didn't allow him a single low grade, to the point that if he failed, they could ignore him or punish him verbally and/or physically. (Y/n) was a classmate who became his friend and helped him see the light in his life and question his parents' behavior a little. To summarize, the yandere best friend befriended (Y/n) and due to his traumas (caused by his parents), he ended up falling in love with her and became motivated to continue studying but this time for himself and of course, to get away from his parents.

He graduated, got a few jobs, studied at the best university thanks to a scholarship, and now he's reunited with his beloved (Y/n) at the company they both now work for. However, he realized that (Y/n) was being stalked by another yandere who was none other than her yandere ex-fiancé. The yandere best friend was physically weaker than him; that's why, when he was kidnapped by the yandere ex-fiancé (who in turn kidnapped his [Y/n]), he was killed along with her, since the yandere ex-fiancé couldn't stand that his beloved not only rejected him, but also protected the yandere best friend.

However, the yandere best friend wakes up in his bed in the middle of the night, excited, and although he thinks it's a nightmare, he sees that the date on his watch says "August 10, 2015," which seemed strange to him. The next morning he realized that he had somehow traveled nine years into the past. In that year, he worked at the same company as his beloved, and he was immensely happy to see her again and feel her embrace.

He didn't want to change that reality for ANYTHING in the world.

Therefore, he would use his knowledge of future events to change not only his course and his end, but also to save his beloved, and how could he not? to make her his and in the process protect her from the yandere ex-fiancé before it's too late.

He changes his look; he dedicates himself to exercise and sports; he approaches (Y/n) with more confidence; he cuts off contact with his narcissistic parents completely, while going to therapy for it; he learns self-defense and gun use; he improves incredibly at his job and earns much more money than before, etc. He also dedicates himself not only to protecting his beloved from everything he considers a danger, but he also pursues the yandere ex-fiancé to get revenge on him and give him some karma for his actions towards (Y/n) and him in his original timeline.

-So, what do you think about this plot?

-A/N: Yes, you can use my plot suggestions for your one shots freely. Just give me credit and that's it.

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reidswhre · 4 months ago

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A vague request for Spencer x reader!! (only if you want too, obviously.) Maybe some hurt/comfort?? I'm such a sucker for those.

spencer reid x fem!reader

summary: you keep your nightmares and insomnia to yourself till you reach a point where you can’t handle it anymore, it’s great your boyfriend is there for ya.

warnings: nightmares, insomnia, anxiety, low self-esteem due to the lack of sleep, however, it’s hurt and comfort! 🫶🏼

a/n: it's a bit rushed but I'm a little inspired so I did it before my inspiration disappeared, i hope you like it. also english isn’t my first language so let me know any mistakes. as always my request are open feel free to send me yours!

Sleeping is supposed to be something pleasant. It usually reduces stress and improves your mood. It’s the favorite activity of many people—in fact, it used to be yours too.

Until insomnia and nightmares began. At first, they weren't that bad; they scared you a bit, but nothing more. Then they became terrible, making you feel so awful you wanted to throw up, which led to unstoppable insomnia.

You used to sleep maybe 3 hours a day at most, and it was killing you. Not only were you unbearably tired all day, but you also had a mood so bad that even you couldn’t stand yourself. As a result, you started treating people around you poorly, which made you feel awful, but at this point, it was beyond your control.

You hadn’t told anyone either—you didn’t want to worry anyone unnecessarily. It wasn’t needed. You were probably just going through a rough patch. Maybe Mercury was in retrograde.

“Hey.” Spencer’s face greeted you when you opened your apartment door to let him in.

“Hi,” you replied with a small smile.

“I really missed you,” he said as he walked into your apartment, planting a kiss on your forehead.

You smiled. “Really? I missed you too,” you said sincerely. “You were gone for a few days.” Spencer’s job often required him to be away, and you handled it pretty well.

“Yeah, the case was tough,” he explained as he placed some bags in your kitchen. “How’ve you been?”

“Me? Well... good, I guess. Nothing new,” you shrugged.

“Are you sure?” He raised his eyebrows, questioning you.

“Yeah, don’t worry.” You looked away, feeling uncomfortable.

Again, you didn’t feel comfortable telling anyone that you hadn’t been able to sleep properly for weeks. There was no point in saying it.

“What’s in the bags?” You pointed at them, trying to change the subject.

“Oh, I read that green tea increases the body's relaxation capacity and helps with sleep. Plus, the amount of L-theanine is higher than caffeine, so it’s a great option to avoid insomnia,” he explained while taking the tea out of the bags.

“You think I need that? Why would you think that?” you said, your mood shifting a bit.

“What? No, I don’t think you need it. I just thought it’d be good to have to relax a bit. Personally, I’m sleeping fine, but I don’t see any harm in drinking it,” he said, looking at you.

“Well, I’m sleeping great too, so I don’t need it, okay?” There it was again. You had no idea why you were treating him this way—he hadn’t done anything wrong.

“I never said otherwise,” he said, frowning.

“Good.” You looked at the floor, feeling uncomfortable.

“Hey, are you sure you’re okay—”

“I’m perfectly fine,” you interrupted him and walked out of the kitchen.

You entered the bathroom in your room and splashed some water on your face, hoping it would refresh you. You looked at yourself in the mirror. You were a bit pale, with dark circles under your eyes that you hadn’t had in years, and your lips were dry. You felt terrible—like a completely different person.

But you decided that if you stayed there any longer, Spencer would come looking for you, and you’d have to give explanations you weren’t willing to share.

When you got back to the living room, you saw him sitting on the couch with his cup of tea and another cup next to him that was probably cold by now.

And you felt horrible.

Horrible wasn’t even enough to describe it.

He had bought and made tea just to help you relax a bit, even without knowing that this was the very thing driving you crazy.

And you had responded terribly.

“Spencer, I—” You tried to start.

“I think it’s better if we just go to bed, don’t you? It’s been a long day,” he said, getting up from the couch.

“Uhh... yeah, sure,” you whispered, staring at the floor.

Your heart was racing, sweat was running down your forehead and neck, and your head was spinning as you tried to push away the dreams that had been tormenting you.

“Hey,” you heard a voice in the distance. “Hey, listen to me, love, hey,” the voice repeated in your head.

“Hey!”

You suddenly sat up in bed, completely disoriented.

“Hey, you’re okay, right? You’re here with me,” Spencer said, looking at you while placing his hand on your knee. But you couldn’t really hear him. Your head was ringing so loudly it felt like it was going to explode.

“Sweetheart?” Spencer stroked your cheek, concerned.

Suddenly, you regained a bit of awareness. You looked at him and his worried face, then around the room. The clock read 12:38 AM. Your hands were sweating, and you were cold.

All of a sudden, everything you’d been carrying for weeks collapsed. It just fell apart, and you started crying like you hadn’t in a long time.

“Oh my God,” Spencer whispered as he wrapped you in his arms, holding you tightly.

“I’m so tired,” you sobbed into his neck.

“What’s going on, love? I need you to tell me, okay? So I can help you,” he whispered in your ear, his voice soft.

“I haven’t been able to sleep for a few weeks now,” you mumbled against him. “I have insomnia and lots of nightmares. I can’t take it anymore.”

“Why didn’t you tell me anything?” he asked, gently cupping your face in his hands.

“I—I don’t know,” you sobbed. “I didn’t want to bother you, and I didn’t want to seem weak, I—” You stumbled over your words.

“Don’t say that. You could never bother me, especially not with something this important. It’s serious, and I don’t think you’re taking it seriously enough,” he said, looking at you with his kind brown eyes, caressing your cheek with his thumb.

“I thought I was just having a few bad days, I don’t know—” you tried to explain through your tears.

“It’s okay, we can work through this. Tomorrow, we can see your therapist and check on how you’re doing, alright?” he said, kissing your forehead.

You nodded without saying anything, feeling safe.

“Let’s get that tea, yeah? I’m sure it’ll calm you down a bit—unless you don’t want it now either, hmm?” he teased you a little.

You let out a small laugh. “I want it.”

“Good, because I was going to make you drink it anyway,” he laughed with you.

“Hey!” you frowned.

“Don’t give me that face,” he said, kissing your furrowed brow.

“Thank you,” you said genuinely.

“For what? For making you drink tea?” he laughed.

“No, silly. For helping me, even though I didn’t treat you very well tonight,” you said, looking at the floor.

“Are you kidding? Of course, I’ll help you. It’s the least I can do. I love you, okay?”

“I love you too,” you said, giving him a small kiss on the lips.

You were probably going to sleep well tonight.

#criminal minds #spencer reid #request #spencer reid x reader #criminal minds x reader #hurt/comfort #spencer reid hurt/comfort #spencer reid drabble #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid one shot #mgg #mathew gray gubler x reader #mathew gray gubler #x reader

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theomnicode · 4 months ago

Text

Saitama and depression; how OPM explores mental health

(TW: Depression, Suicide)

Many readers have more than likely noticed that Saitama seems like a pretty depressed individual, however it is never directly stated besides the above Saitama introspection where he acknowledges it and promptly puts it out of his mind.

This topic came to my mind after seeing this particular video about 8 oddly specific symptoms of depression by Dr. Scott Eilers that are not often talked about. We're going to talk about them and then some. Take note that I'm not a doctor or mental health specialist, I'm just writing meta so that's my disclaimer. :p

We'll start from the beginning and with the heaviest topic of em all related to depression and see how One Punch Man explores this particular mental health issue and move on from there.

Warning, long post ahead.

The most obvious sign of major depression is well, suicidal thoughts and suicidal ideation that Saitama exhibits as early as chapter 2. He never denies wanting to die by Crablante's hand.

Saitama also heavily relates to the guy who wanted to jump from rooftop while he was eating sushi and bluntly talks to him to pull himself up his bootstraps essentially as he did on his own, interpreting that sounding fake and sweetalking would not get through to the guy. (Salmon, Vol 7 extra)

Other signs pointing towards depression would be low energy, lack of motivation, self-isolation, hobbies that are low-energy consuming but stimulating like gaming, manga, watching tv and such, all of which Saitama exhibits... but another common depression symptom is Anhedonia.

"A diverse array of deficits in hedonic function, including reduced motivation or ability to experience pleasure, particularly from previously enjoyable activities."

The doctor in the video describes Achievement anesthesia by the inability to feel positive emotions from achievements. Despite Saitama saving plenty people, he only feels a lack of accomplishment and probably frustration from feelings of uselessness. He used to take joy and satisfaction from helping people out in the past (Brushing up, vol2 extra), but the same and even vastly stronger merits now only serve to highlight how little he feels about them now.

A great contrast.

What was once a great victory, is now just yet another tuesday for Saitama. (One of my fave panels)

Even worse, he does not get brownie points for being a good, upstanding citizen. He gets no money and rarely appreciation for the good he does and that just accumulates his depression when his neighborhood emptied. And with his power, he also gets to clean up the mess because he has the power and it's the right thing to do, be it from picking up litter to saving little kids from getting kidnapped (What can't Be Bought, Vol 5 Extra). But such also breeds jealousy when everyone else reap the rewards, reap the fame and the fans and the good reputation.

The stress of trying to be a good person with moral integrity in a bad world is a heavy load, which can lead to depression, lack of motivation and things like compassion fatigue. The more he tries to find something worthy of doing, the more he invests in it, the more he keeps getting disappointed by the lackluster feeling and reception he gets.

Saitama beats himself up for moral failures, which is a contributing factor for his depression, such as when he was in the tournament and monsters were running amok, despite not having no prior knowledge of monsters around the area. The complete lack of explicit improvement on things he wants to do however, is the most sore point. He didn't learn a thing in the tournament and just felt like he was wasting time, conditioning him to think that self-improvement is just a waste of time on itself because he won't learn anything anyway.

Being good at something naturally makes one feel better about themselves and Saitama's low self-esteem and for instance, lack of skill in gaming, creates friction and Angry perfectionism. One especially doesn't want their few fun hobbies to feel like hollow endeavours. Being competitive, one would want to git gud and accomplish growth and getting constantly trashed by one finger keeps driving it home that Saitama is not actually good at this thing either, something that he wants to enjoy doing. Saitama also constantly projects his bad mood and this insecurity by trying to trash talk King, without much success. King is such a good friend though that fortunately the does not seem to mind Saitama getting pissed at being a sore loser. True pro gamer bro.

Lets pray Saitama never finds that mmorpg's have hardcore raids, he would never be able to leave the house again. 😂

-*-

Which brings us to the last point in the video, Addiction to emotion-creating activities.

If Saitama was any less strong willed and less restrained and if he actually had money to spare, he would 100% develop a gambling addiction. Keep this man far, far away from social media too.

However, as soon as something...or someone...breaks through that fugue and creates actual emotion, one can develop an addiction to the thing because our brains want/need that dopamine fix.

Genos just so happened to barge into his very lonely life life and became that someone to create that emotional connection with and Genos provides too when he's taken over cleaning and majority of the cooking and even finances, something that people with depression struggle to accomplish. When Saitama cooks, it's usually not very difficult dish to prepare either, chop ingredients and toss them into the pan. Saitama also loves food and needs money to feel like he's financially secure, being unemployed, and has little social contacts, so it's like triple-dipping in the dopamine sauce. Nomnom, feelsgoodman.

It's all well and good until shit gets real and your main source of feel-good emotional connection just dies. Oh and it's your fault too cuz you played around. Good job Saitama. That's a deadly amount of guilt and a PTSD as a cherry on top.

Genos' continued existence is essentially applying bandaid to a bleeding head wound that's Saitama's mental health issues.

Ultimately, I do wonder if ripping off the bandaid is why Saitama wants to get back his private space away from Genos, because he subconsciously understands it's not very healthy to be so emotionally dependant and Genos is just as obsessed about him. The allure of social contact and benefits are great, but so too are the detrimental effects, among them complete lack of privacy which is a nightmare for a private introvert like Saitama.

(Yes yes, it's still pretty dang funny, but it's still invasion of privacy)

-*-

Last example of Saitama's depression I want to touch, thanks to @gofancyninjaworld for the input, is Saitama's forgetfulness, a memory disruption if you will.

"Depressed individuals typically show poor memory for positive events, potentiated memory for negative events, and impaired recollection."

It is a running joke that Saitama has difficulty recalling names, which may be entirely normal because he does not really care to remember names for people he's improbable to meet later and emotional connection and repetition helps us memorize things better (such as Genos having to repeat his name upon introduction), however Saitama has also showcased potentially impaired recollection for events that happened just moments prior.

(Again, a great contrast. Show, don't tell, where one shows obvious signs of depression and another...not so obvious, in the same panel, in a humorous way to boot. Masterful way of tackling heavy topics, in my humble opinion.)

Genos worries for his memory in the Majin drama cd 1 and often tries to accomodate for his lapses of memory too, be it long ultimate attack name phrase, marking special sales or whatnot. Saitama forgetting to take out trash and forgetting names is normal, but it may be exacerbated by his depression.

The more telling part is probably the fact that even when his memory is jogged, he still does not remember Flash's name. It's like he never registered the name in the first place, maybe he did not bother because he thought it wasn't important but it does not appear he's trolling here and legitimately does not remember. Though he does remember the nickname he gave for Flash instead, which is funny. He made it up on the spot and it's hilarious, so it stuck.

The less emotional connection one has to things, the less likely we are to remember those things, such as the monsters Saitama kills are blurred together because he feels no self-satisfaction from killing said monsters and protecting people.

In the sense that memory block can also be a trauma response, ONE makes Saitama's complete lack of recall of the ominous future a running joke in classic ONE fashion. It's either that or time shenanigans. Or both, both is good.

Last but not least, Saitama also shows that he recalls little to no appreciation from helping people, despite the rare occasion where he receives gratitude from directly intervening and he definitely remembers the more negative events better, such as when he complained about going unnoticed and not having fans. (Hobby and work, cpt 15). He can recite the story to Genos when asked but there does not seem to be instance where he mentions such without prompted.

All is not lost in the memory department however, since Saitama shows a potential memory recall improvement in the recent retconnect chapter Tenninto where he recognises the martial art dudes from the tournament he was in. It might be nothing, as it was retconned too but ONE is definitely keeping it in mind.

It is quite fitting thought that the video talks about how "normal people look like superheroes" because they have the energy and motivation to do daily tasks and OPM is a superhero manga about a person who's the strongest hero but he barely considers himself a hero. ONE has also said in an interview that just living a "normal life" is hard and OPM definitely reflects that sentiment.

-*-

Saitama is slowly getting there though. He seems happier, more confident, more outgoing and a larger array of emotional displays, to the point that some people in the fandom have voiced their complaints about the apathetic hero apparently smiling too often. To that I say, character progression is a thing and a good thing at that.

Saitama even has better gait when he used to slouch and drag his feet that bespeaks of his increasing self-confidence. Less self-doubts + more confidence = more gains.

He was also able to calm down despite losing heavily to King in a fighting game and still feeling very irritated after the fact, but offered his blunt advice to lift weights anyway, which would indicate better emotional regulation. His attention span has also seemingly improved, despite the Knight yapping away for an entire panel. (Worlds I know nothing about, cpt 193). Then even when the entire thing of releasing an epic monster was just as boring monster encounter as the rest of them, he seemingly took it as a learning experience of expanding his world-view instead of complaining his utter boredom. He also recalls the tiny tidbit about Flash's utter lack of finding his way in the underground maze and remembers Blast, his name and thanks him for getting them out of the underground hole.

(Mathing is hard though but this may also be a 4th wall breaking meme because we've never seen Saitama defeat sonic 14 times on screen. Are we being gaslit? lmao)

-*-

Closing thoughts, we've not seen the last of Saitama's mental health journey, far from it. Nor have we adressed that legitimate concern of PTSD in the background and I'm sure it will pop up at some point or another...too much of an opportunity for ONE to just ignore in this master thesis of a manga about issues he feels are important.

Anyways, thank you all for reading this far, it's been a while. :D

#opm #one punch man #saitama #genos #opm king #opm meta #flashy flash #tw suicide #tw depression #mental health #opm manga panels #my own work #long #character analysis #character study

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wangxianficfinder · 15 days ago

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In the mood for...

Dec 13th

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1. Hiiiiiii✨🤗

Sorry if this has already been asked but for the next itmf id like some Wei Wuxian fell first fics (bonus points if it’s canon era but im okay with whatever except for modern AUs)

Thxx<3

Scars of Lightning by The_peregrine_falcon (T, 6k, YZY & WWX, WWX & WRH, WangXian, YZY’s A+ Parenting, Canon Divergence, Not Canon Compliant, Wen WWX, zidian, YZY is a bitch, Canon-Typical Violence, Blood and Injury, Major Character Injury, Heavy Angst, Lotus Pier, Nightless City, Young WWX, Muteness, Hurt kind of comfort)

How You Would Let Me Have You by longleggedgit (E, 15k, WangXian, XiQing, Arranged Marriage, Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Divergence, First Time, The LXC/WQ is a “mutual beards” situation just FTR)

Honesty is the Best Policy (Except if You’re an Asshole)by piecrust (E, 22k, WangXian, Porn with Feelings, College/University)

~*~

2. Itmf fics where wwx inspires awe, loyalty and respect from the person who actually get to know him and interact with him. I don't want it to be superficial as in the fic just ' mentioning ' wei ying doing and later writing out how this inspired such such emotions in people BUT RATHER It being shown as a gradual thing starting with little things Wei Ying does for people around him and going on with how the people around him changed for this. For example: dispersing clouds (?) (Kinda)

Please make it longer than 50k and NOT VERY comedic tone (as in making everything, even serious things funny) and I'm ok with anything EXCEPT modern au. Thankyou. @constellation-dks

Sunset, Sunrise by Ariana Deralte (ArianaDeralte) (T, 59k, WWX & WRH, WangXian, WIP, Time Travel Fix-It, Crack, Temporary Character Death, sorry I killed a-Yuan for a few paragraphs before the time travel, WWX is a Wen, Genius WWX, WRH gets to rewatch the series as a treat, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, in this house we acknowledge that all the sects have flaws, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, WWX Has ADHD, Bad Parents JFM & YZY, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Autistic LWJ)

golden when the day met the night by glitteringmoonlight (Not Rated, 95k, WangXian, WIP, Slow-ish burn, Sugar Daddy LWJ, which is an anachronistic term for this fic but it fits, Light Angst, Fluff, Developing Relationship, WWX gets all the appreciation he deserves, even if he’s a bit confused about it at first, warprize au with a twist, in that everyone thinks WWX is a warprize, but LWJ has only platonic and honourable intentions, at first, Eventual Smut)

Practical Considerations by teawater, the_anthropologist (E, 97k, WangXian, JC & WWX, LXC & WWX, LQR & WWX, Arranged Marriage, Canon Divergence, Found Family, Spouses to Lovers, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, Politics, Scheming, Lán Elders are assholes, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, eventually BAMF LXC, learning to make decisions, Learning Self-worth, Self-Esteem Issues, Sweet Wangxian, Domestic Fluff, Fix-It, JC is a big asshole, he improves somewhat but it’s open-ended, WWX learns to stand up for himself, Quote: Come Back to Gusu With Me, POV wwx, POV LWJ, POV JC, Golden Core Reveal, Teacher wwx, Golden Core Transfer Fix-It, Alcohol as a Coping Mechanism, Past Suicidal Thoughts, Post-Sunshot Campaign, WWX Protection Squad, Feelings Realization, WWX protector of the twin jades, Protective LWJ, Protective WWX, Protective LQR, Demonic Cultivator WWX, WWX is Loved, Married WangXian, Genius WWX, Everybody Lives)

~*~

3. Hi! Itmf any fics where wwx managed to off Wen Chao in the xuanwu cave, doesn’t need a specific or any pairing. Wip or abandoned also fine. Thanks! @insanitywhat

Trials of Time by Muggle_Diary (E, 32k, WangXian, Major Character Death, Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Underage Sex, Not Jiang Family Friendly, YZY Bashing, JC Bashing, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Artistic Liberties, Butterfly Effect, WWX is free of debts, WangXian in love, Fluff, Established Relationship, Period-Typical Homophobia) Wen Chao's death occurs in chapter 9

💖 The Echoes of that News Ring Loud by Scarlet_Gryphon (T, 111k, NHS & NMJ, 3Zun, NHS/WN, WangXian, Major Character Death, Time Travel Fix-It, NMJ Lives, WWX Raised by a Different Sect, Universal Da-ge NMJ, JGY deserved better, Cinnamon Roll WN, Temporary character death (but they get better), Canon-Typical Violence, Canon-Typical Behavior, Everyone Lives, Good Guy XY, Let's give NHS Battle Fans club member, Gray-Ace power trio 3Zun, Canon Divergence, discussions of JGS's canon-levels of dickery, brief and non-graphic discussion of past rape/non-con due to QS's origins, Mentions of Nightmares, NHS is a Little Shit, Minor Character Death, Happy Ending) Wen Chao's death occurs in chapter 6, although Wei Ying didn't seem to be trying to intentionally kill him in this one

~*~

4. Hi! I'm itmf fanfics in which adult lwj time travels to the cr era, it can be either to his teen body or as an adult and I want wwx to love him a lot, although I'm searching for plot ff some pwp is also fine ty😊💗

❤️ For Both Of Us (And Time Is But A Paper Moon) by sami (E, 65k, WangXian, Time Travel, Some People Live/Not Everyone Dies, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, Healing, Yunmeng Shuangjie, Canon Divergence, Asexual JC, First Time, Getting Together, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, [Podfic] Cold read of For Both Of Us (And Time Is But A Paper Moon) by kisahawklin, Для нас обоих (И время лишь бумажная луна) (Russian translation) by nomuad) this involves LWJ time traveling to his birth, but the Cloud Recesses lectures are included

Back up and dream again by The Silverfish (ZephyrAndTheSilverfish) (T, 3k, WangXian, Fix-It, Time Travel, Fluff, Flirting, Cute, Embarrassed WWX)

I Have Arranged to Tie You to Me by xxxMiaHikarixxx (G, 47k, WIP, WangXian, Lan protective team, Time Travel, Past, LWJ oriented, Arranged Marriage, Boys In Love, Soulmates, Fix-It, Jiang siblings, not jiang parents friendly, JC is slowly becoming a good sibling, Soft LWJ, Protective LWJ, Genius WWX)

🔒 The Second Hand Unwinds by trulywicked (E, 75k, WangXian, JYL/JZX, WIP, Time Travel Fix-It, Not JC Friendly, Not Yunmeng Jiang Sect Friendly, Not Jiāng Family Friendly, Not YZY Friendly, Time Travelling LWJ, Protective LWJ, Fluff, Minor Angst, Minor Character Death, JGS is his own warning, Wooing, LWJ is romantic af, Inventor WWX, Genius WWX, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Protective Gusu Lan Sect, Supportive LXC, Good Uncle LQR, WWX Protection Squad)

The Wild Geese’s Tomb by The Feels Whale (miscellea) (T, 66k, WangXian, Time Travel AU, fixit, Temporary Character Death, all women live no women die, LWJ’s canonically intense feelings about everything all the time, WWX’s clinical depression gets treated and blamed on resentful energy, navigating gay marriage in ancient china by utiliizing class snobbery for your own ends, if you’re not sure whose fault anything going on in here is then blaming NHS is probably a good bet, WWX plays ‘summon LWJ’ it’s super effective!, the ‘unexploded cow’ approach to dealing with your enemies)

~*~

5. ITMF!!!! A) I once saw people talking about fics where WWX was adopted by the Jin and now I simply have to know if there are any fics like that :D B) I'm also looking for possible whump fics for Wei Wuxian but with a happy ending. Thank you for everything you do, we really appreciate you <3

5A)

🔒 Candy & Conspiracies by Reverie (cl410) (T, 16k, WangXian, XuanLi, MianQing, Jīn Sect WWX, Chaos Gremlin WWX, Fluff and Crack, Humor, Cloud Recesses, Found Family, pure idiocy, And some light murder, good madam jin, No Angst, Canon Divergence)

🔒 Twin Treasures by crossdressingdeath (T, 81k, WIP, JZX & WWX, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Can’t quite tag this as ‘everyone lives’ but I promise everyone who dies will DESERVE IT, mostly novel-verse with a bit of CQL here and there, currently being edited)

🔒Mischief & Mayhem by Reverie (cl410) (T, 15k, WIP, Madam Jin/SiSi, Crack, Fluff and Humor, Jīn Sect WWX, Chaos Gremlin WWX, the chaotic jin trio we could have had, Genius WWX, BAMF LQY, Found Family)

Silver eyes meet gold by EuphoricSuds (Not Rated, 3k, WangXian, JZX & WWX, XuanLi, Minor Character Death, Canonical Character Death, Implied/Referenced Character Death, BAMF WWX, Hurt WWX, Genius WWX, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Domestic Fluff, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Family Fluff, WWX Gets a Hug, WWX is Loved, WWX is LSZ's Parent, WWX is a Jīn, WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiāngs, Canon Rewrite, Out of Character WWX, Out of Character, Comfort No Hurt, Cute WWX)

5B)

use the wood brought in by the tide by Lirazel (M, 27k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Hurt/Comfort, Warning for Physical Abuse, Falling In Love With Your Husband, pining for your husband, Sibling solidarity, dealing with your in-laws, lwj’s typical inner maelstrom of emotions, WWX Whump, Protective!LWJ, lwj&jyl friendship, intimate hair brushing, Skinny Dipping, Growing Up, Establishing boundaries)

I have died everyday waiting for you by jalpari (M, 7k, WangXian, Canon-typical violence and angst, WWX Whump, LWJ Whump, Ghost WWX, Sentient Burial Mounds, Five Stages of Grief, Getting Together, Angst with a Happy Ending)

Silenced by Tasharene (M, 63k, WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, PTSD, Temporary Blindness, Aversion to touch, Fear of crowds, Panic Attacks, Post-Canon, WWX Whump, Hurt WWX, Angst with a Happy Ending, world-class troll lxc)

❤️ whipstitch by curiositykilled (M, 131k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Dysfunctional Family, Torture, WWX Lives, but basically no one else, Case Fic, Cultivation Sect Politics, Past Abuse, WWX Whump, YLLZ WWX, JL Needs a Hug, JL Tries, Yunmeng Bro Reconciliation, Past Character Death, Body Horror, Non-Consensual Body Modification, POV Alternating, Flashbacks, Eventual Happy Ending, Heavy Angst, Suicide Attempt, PTSD, Depression, Not A Fix-It, Mouth Sewn Shut) should be noted as "mostly happy ending, slightly bittersweet"

to take his place by Eicas (T, 9k, JC & JYL & WWX, Hurt/Comfort, Canon Divergence: JC does not get caught by the Wens, (Wei Wuxian does.), Torture, Aftermath of Torture, (neither particularly graphic), WWX whump, but also wwx care & reassurance that they still want him so there's that!, Post-Fall of Lotus Pier, Yungmeng Siblings) should be noted as "mostly happy ending, slightly bittersweet"

to hell and back for you by blumeraki (G, 5k, WangXian, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Universe, Protective WWX, Protective LWJ, Everything Hurts, Implied/Referenced Torture, Hurt WWX, Hurt LWJ, Branding Iron, Whipping, discipline whip, jc saves the day, Canon Divergence)

🔒💖 the universe would turn to a mighty stranger by RavenclawLoki (T, 11k, wangxian, Angst, Eventual Fluff, Some mentions of blood, it looks like someone is dead but!!, it is okay, everything is going to be okay i promise, First Kiss, Canon Divergence, Wwx and lwj know they’re in love, They just don’t know the other loves them back, Everyone Lives AU, Hurt WWX, Hurt LWJ)

build me no shrines by occultings (microcomets) (M, 54k, WangXian, Slow Burn, Mutual Pining, First Time, Getting Together, Confessions, Sharing a Bed, Hair Washing, Sentient Burial Mounds, Case Fic, Post-Canon, CQL Compliant, Hurt/Comfort, Whump, Light Angst, Flashbacks, mild body horror, foot washing, Happy Ending, Non-Sexual Intimacy..., then sexual intimacy, playing fast and loose with mdzs lore, WWX learning to accept intimacy without deflection, occasional LWJ humor agenda, 🔒 [Podfic] build me no shrines by flamingwell)

in your skin by darkredloveknot (enheduane) (E, 10k, WangXian, Post-Canon, Pre-Relationship, Getting Together, Horror, Body Horror, Blood and Gore, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, Non-Consensual Body Modification, kinda??, Reflections over death and self-worth, mentions of canon suicide, Near Death Experiences,🔒[Podfic] in your skin by flamingwell)

The Edge of Night by Hobbsy3 (M, 277k, WangXian, XuanLi, Modern AU, Zombie Apocalypse, Yúnmèng Siblings Dynamics, Accidental Baby Acquisition During a Zombie Apocalypse, Junior Quartet, (except they’re all babies), Angst with a Happy Ending, Minor Character Death, Hurt/Comfort, Blood and Gore, Ensemble Cast, Worst Zombie Fighting Team Ever, Found Family)

Game Night by Hobbsy3 (T, 46k, WangXian, XuanLi, NieLan, Kidnapping, Implied/Referenced Torture, Witness Protection, Angst with a Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, Dark Comedy, Modern AU, Protective LWJ, Protective JYL, Protective JC, Fusion with the movie 'Game Night', Mentioned Junior Quartet, TGCF cameos if you squint)

💖 nothing you confess by PorcupineGirl (T, 31k, WangXian, Soulmates, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, POV Alternating, Golden Core Reveal, Depressed WWX, WWX Has PTSD, JC & LWJ Friendship, friendship may be too strong a word more like allies who are gonna love the shit outta post-burial-mounds WWX whether he likes it or not, Hurt/Comfort, Recovery)

To lurk, to lie in wait by trippednfell (M, 124k, WangXian, Modern AU, strangers to co-parents to lovers, Strangers to Lovers, Kid Fic, teenage juniors, background NieLan, Angst with a Happy Ending, Case Fic, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Not Really Character Death, If there is main character death it's very temporary, Fox Spirit WWX, Dragon LWJ, Blood and Injury, Additional Warnings In Author's Note)

Birthday Party by waffles_4_breakfast (E, 102k, WangXian, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Fix-It, Canon Divergence, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Misunderstandings, Sharing a Bed, Angst with a Happy Ending, Happy Ending, Getting Together, Mutual Pining, Canon-Typical Violence, Pining, Slow Burn, Poison, Torture, Requited Unrequited Love, First Time, Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Rough Sex, Oral Sex, Come as Lube, Bondage, Dom/sub Undertones, Spit As Lube, Rimming, Consensual Non-Consent, Safe Sane and Consensual, Additional Warnings In Author’s Note)

Stars bring us apart (Stars pull us together) by Sixlayerhouse (sixlayerhouse) (E, 124k, WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, (Vaguely) Star Trek AU, Canon-Typical Violence, Psychological Trauma, PTSD, Body modifications, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Recovery, married!wangxian)

🔒Whumptober: Torture and In The Hands of the Enemy by treemaidengeek (T, 4k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Torture, but not explicitly shown; see author's note for details, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Protective LWJ, Hostage Situations)

🔒ransom by alessandriana (G, 3k, JC & WWX, hurt/comfort, dizziness, fainting)

a buried and burning flame by otherhippo (hippopotamus) (T, 17k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Implied/Referenced Torture, Kinda dark?, Angst with a Happy Ending, does it count as bedsharing if theres…no bed, Imprisonment, Hurt/Comfort)

❤️ the best of you by sysrae (E, 41k, WangXian, XuanLi, Modern AU, College/University, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt/Comfort, Mutual Pining, Getting Together, slightly undernegotiated kink, but in a very soft and consensual way, Nightmares, Panic Attacks, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, JFM and YZY's A+ parenting, Dysfunctional Family, Mental Health Issues, Reference to animal attacks/animal cruelty, descriptions of past violence)

~*~

6. ITMF a fic where LSZ either uses demonic cultivation or become a demonic cultivator like his dad @silas-octapisseron

Give Me A Reason by useless_slytherclaw (M, 251k, ZhuiYi, Angst with a Happy Ending, Heavy Angst, Friends to Lovers, Post-Canon, Canon Compliant, Mutual Pining, Minor WangXian, Minor LingZhen, Aged-Up Character(s), Grief/Mourning, Travel, Death, PTSD, Dreams and Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, Rogue Cultivator LJY, Family Feels, Demisexual LJY, Canon-Typical Violence, Injury Recovery, Love Confessions) has LSZ using demonic cultivation in desperation and suffering the consequences.

Your Love Keeps Me Alive by locketofyourhair (T, 11k, Pre-Poly Junior Quartet, established wangxian, The Burial Mounds Linger, 5+1 Things, Canon-Typical Violence, Wholesome Necromancy, POV Multiple, Demonic Cultivator LSZ, Badass Juniors, Blood and Injury, Implied past one-sided WN/WWX, Near Death Experiences)

Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses by hansbekhart (Not Rated, 19k, LSZ & LWJ, WangXian, dad wangji, LWJ’s Questionable Parenting Skills, Grief/Mourning, Recovery, Injury Recovery, Hopeful Ending, Canon-Typical Violence, Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses [podfic] by someplacelikebolivia) Lan Sizhui uses demonic cultivation near the end of Gathered Herbs & Sweet Grasses

~*~

7. Hello!! Thanks for all the hard work! 🩷🩷

I’m not sure if this is the right place to ask, but I recently discovered that XiCheng was a ship and have become curious. But I can’t seem to find any fics I enjoy with this pairing!

So I’d appreciate some good recs for Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng, preferably based in canon era (but I don’t mind modern au’s), if it includes time travel, even the better!!! @jinxedjaz

🔒 A Small Measure of Peace by Sandstone112 (M, 123k, XiCheng, WangXian, Fluff and Angst, Slow Burn, Kind Of, Canon-Typical Violence, Miscommunication, XiCheng endgame, Found Family, Family) for supportive childrearing

My Wingman, Lan Wangji by JiangChengLotus (T, 3k, XiCheng, WangXian, 5+1 Things, Humor, Fluff, Marriage Proposal, Crack, Chaos, Soft XiCheng, Declarations Of Love, Embarrassed JC) for humor

Talent Hunt Crew Finds Angry Guy Shouting On College Campus, Recruits Him For Vocal Projection Abilities by oh_fudgecakes (T, 206k, XiCheng, WangXian, Modern AU, Reality TV, Slow Burn, Romance, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, BAMF JYL) for a modern AU

Two Sides of the Same Coin by JiangChengLotus (T, 4k, XiCheng, WangXian, Bodyswap, Humor, Fluff, Bonding, Chaos, Developing Friendships, Misunderstandings)

I'm Your What? by JiangChengLotus (T, 6k, JC/LXC, WangXian, JC & WWX, Fluff, Time Travel, Humor, Soft JC, Protective LWJ, Family Feels, Kid Fic, Love Confessions, Let LQR Rest)

Disregarding Public Interest (or How Everyone Except Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng Knew They Were Together) by monoquist (T, 37k, JC/LXC, WangXian, JL/LSZ, Fluff, Crack, Established Relationship, Canon Compliant, Post-Canon)

The Trials and Tribulations of a Modern Father by Bgtea (T, 24k, JC/LXC, JFM/YZY, WangXian, JYL/JZX, JC & JFM, JC & YZY & JFM & JYL & WWX, Modern, Everyone Lives, Crack, JFM POV, JFM attempts at being a father, JC/LXC-centric, JC-centric)

🔒 Emergency Help Wanted by Piyo13 (T, 76k, JC/LXC, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Lawyer JC, LXC is an idiot, JC is the best jiujiu ever, Everyone Lives, Modern, POV Third Person, Fluff, Homophobia as a concept doesn't exist in this verse, Happy Ending, Slow Burn)

How to Escape Your Problems and Live Your Life in Denial – the Jiang Cheng Edition by Bgtea (E, 160k, LXC/JC, WangXian, Modern, Cat Cafés, How to be an adult and fail at it, Slow Burn, Fluff and Humor, JFM's A+ parenting, sex in chapter 23, Anal Sex, Frottage, JC-centric, JC/LXC-centric)

~*~

8. would u happen to know of a completed crossover fic over 50k words?

like with all three of the main mxtx bottoms? @chaosconchick

~*~

9. Hi! Thank you for all you do! I’m in the mood for a fic like “Stunted, Starving, Juvenility” by TomatenMark. I want it to have a heavy focus on Wangxian and their developing relationship. I want it to have a fluffy feel but as long as it isn’t dark or super hurt/comfort I’m ok with it. Ideally it would be multi chapter and take place at least partly when they are teens in Gusu. I just really want a sweet fic with WWX and LWJ being whipped for each other. Thank you so much! @kjwaikiki

These might have a tad more angst than they were looking for for 9 but otherwise fit the request

🧡 Company by WithBroomBefore (T, 29k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Pre-Relationship, Getting Together, POV LWJ, Fix-It, Pre-Canon, at least to start, WWX goes to Cloud Recesses, But Not In The Usual Way, fear of character death, Everybody Lives, Hurt/Comfort, Happy Ending, Light Angst, good teacher LQR, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, brief discussion of past minor character suicide, Kitten, Not YZY Friendly)

❤️ Gentians in bloom by teawater (M, 251k, wangxian, Canon Divergence, AU after cold spring, Political Marriage, Dysfunctional Family, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Fix-It, Hurt/Comfort, LQR bashing (not really), POV Multiple, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Eventual Happy Ending, BAMF WWX, JC is actually a lot better than canon, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, YZY bashing (again not completely))

🔒 in the shadow of moonlit flowers by Reverie (cl410) (T, 56k, wangxian, LXC/NMJ, Cloud Recesses, LWJ & NHS Friendship, Developing Relationship, POV LWJ, Minor Injuries, Autistic LWJ, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, aka the Madam Yu warning, Genius WWX, Light Angst And Hurt/Comfort, WWX Protection Squad, Gusu Lan Sect, Slow Burn, Protective LWJ, LWJ-centric) the element of Dispersing Clouds featuring supportive Lans (and bad Jiangs)

🧡 To have and to hold by Moominmammashandbag (M, 78k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Major character injury, CQL verse, Happy Ending)

~*~

10. Hi so I've been watching a lot of anime and you know the main character being like a reincarnated villainous and so I just thought to myself what if wwx got reincarnated into a game that he played through and he is the villain and he like tries to survive everything and he's like he's usual self cheerful and all that and of course lwj is in there too like a main character kind of male or whatever and I kind of want several male leads in there as well I don't know but I just think it would be really cute and I watched too many anime about it and I really want to read about this so if you can find some fic that has some kind of story lineup that is kind of like a villainous setup that got reincarnated that would be great

~*~

11. hello hello this is for itmf

A) are there any fics like this basically, mxy!wwx and yllz!wwx switching places

B) anything and everything with bad ass wei wuxian, or possessive wwx, I'll take anything, open to everything just pls let it be a complete TT

11B)

A Life Without Regrets by naqaashi (M, 163k, WangXian, JFM & WWX, JC & WWX, WRH & WWX, LXC & LWJ, LQR & LWJ, LWJ & NHS, Canon Divergence, Time Travel Fix-It, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Crack Treated Seriously, musical cultivation, Slow Burn, Pining, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Murder Husbands, PTSD, BAMF WWX, Demonic Cultivation, POV WWX, Cultivation Sect Politics, Worldbuilding, No Yīn Iron, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Artist WWX, Musician WWX, Night Hunts, Fate & Destiny, Bad Parent JFM & YZY, Golden Core, Cultivation Theory, Sentient Burial Mounds, Father-Son Relationship, Dysfunctional Family, Grief/Mourning, Parent-Child Relationship, Angry WWX, Pining WWX, WWX is Not Okay, No Golden Core Transfer, BAMF LWJ, Pining LWJ, POV LWJ, Angry LWJ, One-Braincell Wangxian, Love Confessions, Idiots in Love)

❤️ And Time Is But a Paper Moon by sami (M, 138k, WangXian, XiChengQing, Time Travel, Fix-It, Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Healing, Mental Health Issues, PTSD, Hurt/Comfort, Depression, BAMF WWX, BAMF JC, BAMF LWJ, BAMF JYL, Getting Together, And Time is But a Paper Moon [PODFIC] by sami, Winterstar1412, [Podfic] Cold read of And Time Is But A Paper Moon by kisahawklin)

🧡 The Shade of Old Trees by Kryal (T, 363k, WangXian, Ridiculously Long Notes, History, Canon Divergence, Modern AU, Slow Burn, Worldbuilding, Slow Life, Action/Adventure, Magic Returns, BAMF WWX)

We'll Build A Dynasty (one the heavens can't shake) by One_eyed_God (T, 66k, WangXian, canon typical Jiang family dynamics, BAMF WWX, Canon JC Characteristics, POV Outsider, Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Relationship, WWX is a Wen, Sect Leader WWX, Genius WWX, The Casual Intimacy of Hand-Holding, Minor XuanLi, Not JC Friendly, Time Travel Fix-It)

🔒 Whatever you do by apathyinreverie (T, 8k, WangXian, LXC & LWJ, somewhat darker cultivation world, BAMF WWX, BAMF LWJ, BAMF LXC, don't mess with the twin jades, not Jiang friendly, YZY Bashing, WWX is appreciated, genius WWX, everyone is a little darker in this, except for WWX, who is still sunshine personified, Fluff, Possessive LWJ, Gusu Lan would like to send Yunmeng a fruits basket, as thanks for their idiocy, Fix-It)

~*~

12. Hello!! Would it be possible to get a rec list of long, plotty wangxian fics (40k+ preferred) with happy endings that don’t have any wwx/other or lwj/other? (No former lovers, partners, etc.) thank you!! @bookkbaby

Twelve Moons and a Fortnight by stiltonbasket (M, 290k, WangXian, Humor, Slow Burn, Post-Canon Fix-It, Long-Distance Relationship, Epistolary, Love Letters, Family Feels, a-qing lives, teenage romance, Adoption, Romantic Comedy, Happy Ending, Weddings, Case Fic, Parenthood, Politics) is a great fic and part of a series. It is very much a slow burn though.

🧡 Stunted, Starving Juvenility by TomatenMark (E, 887k, WangXian, WIP, Cloud Recesses Study Arc, Getting Together, Supportive LQR, Hurt/Comfort, Fix-It of Sorts, Supportive LXC, Canon Divergence, Inventor WWX, Possessive LWJ, Cultivation Sect Politics, Pre-Sunshot Campaign, Fluff and Smut, Burning of the Cloud Recesses, Fall of Lotus Pier, Angst, Sunshot Campaign, Not JFM Friendly, split into parts, Part 1 complete, Part 2 complete, Original Character(s)) it is not completed though the author is updating about every month-ish and is split in parts within the fic itself.

The Beast of Gusu series by Netrixie (T&M, 212k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Eventual Happy Ending, Unreliable Narrator, Slow Burn, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon-Typical Angst, Wolf-shifter WWX, Resolved Sexual Tension, Resolved Romantic Tension, Fix-It, Werewolf, Shapeshifters, Sunshot Campaign, Canonical Lan arm strength, Supportive LXC, Good Parent JFM, POV Alternating, Time Skips, LQR is a bad parent and so is QHJ, LQR Being an Asshole, Found Family, WWX is LXC's anger translator, Super Soft, Зверь из Гусу by Den_Allen) which has some supernatural elements as WWX is a wolf shifter but it is a fantastic story.

💖🔒 love, in fire and blood by cicer (E, 360k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ WWX, Arranged Marriage, political scheming, Gratuitous Domesticity, Mutual Pining, EXTREME SLOWBURN, the inherent eroticism of the forehead ribbon, The Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known, neither wwx nor lwj want to be Perceived, but sorry kids! it’s gonna happen!, rated E but the the NSFW stuff doesn’t begin until chapter 19!, bottom LWJ in chapter 20 and 27, Mojo’s post)

~*~

13. For ITMF!

Are there any fics in where lwj or wwx are trans, or for example mxy is trans and the other (or on this case both lwj and wwx) didn't know. and they get their period and freak out real bad.

I'm okay with everything, abo or whatever.

What the Water Leaves Behind by John_lzhc (T, 11k, WangXian, LJY & LSZ, WIP, Trans Male Character, Trans WWX, Menstruation, grief and morning, Hurt/Comfort, Marriage Negotiations, moderate shenanigans, asexual LJY, LJY third generation gremlin, soft italicised 'oh' moment) Not exactly what they asked for but close. Wwx is tranamasc, lwj knows but also goes full panic at wwx+blood

~*~

14. In the mood for fic, where Lan Zhan is the one getting thrown into Burial mounds and becoming demonic cultivator. I wonder if there is such fic like that anywhere. Or even better, if there is Nie Huaisang getting thrown into there as well. Because the idea of demonic cultivator Nie Huaisang scares me more than any other character and I would love to read it.

Gold Blood Eyes by Loveable_Psychopath (T, 72k, WangXian, XuanLi, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon Divergence, Everybody Lives, Except the bad people, Dark LWJ, i guess?, He gets cursed and becomes a demonic cultivator, Established WangXian, Secret Relationship, Sentient Burial Mounds, Demonic Cultivation, Golden Core Reveal, Found Family, Character Study, Character Bashing, Implied/Referenced Child AbuseImplied/Referenced Torture, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Mental Health Issues, Communication, but also miscommunication, Twin Prides of Yunmeng Feels, YZY Bashing, JFM Bashing) I don't think Lan Zhan gets thrown into the Burial Mounds in either of these but he does become a Demonic Cultivator in Gold Blood Eyes and Until The World Embraces Me Home

Until The World Embraces Me Home by azri (T, 5k, WIP, WangXian, Canon Divergence, YLLZ LWJ, LWJ Has No Golden Core, Role Reversal, Not LXC Friendly, Not JC Friendly, Not cultivation world friendly overall tbh, Sunshot Campaign, Friends to Lovers, Temporary Character Death, WangXian Get a Happy Ending)

~*~

15. INMF fics like a song in the shadows by alyakthedarklord, aka wwx gives birth to lsz but they get disconnected/think the other is dead when lsz is little only to be reunited when he’s a bit older

I'll Take Such Great Care of You by CheekyBrunette (G, 50k, WangXian, LWJ & LSZ & WWX, Modern, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Family Fluff, Family Feels, Domestic Fluff, Angst, LWJ Adopts LSZ, LSZ-centric, LSZ Needs a Hug, i think it's a canon-typical tragic backstory, so i will say there will be mentions of dangerous and uncomfortable situations from the past, but probably nothing worse than the source material, Panic Attacks, Claustrophobia, Nightmares, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Implied/Referenced Organ Harvesting)

All The Years Lost by UseMyMuse (T, 26k, WangXian, Teen Pregnancy, Angst with a Happy Ending, Single Parent AU, Forced misunderstandings, Forced miscommunication, Mpreg) All The Years Lost and The Winner Takes It All. Wei Ying and Lan Zhan's separations were forced by Yu Ziyuan in both stories.

The Winner Takes It All by YilingSani (M, 46k, WangXian, Modern AU, Single Parent WWX, Old Friends, One Night Stands, No Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Forgiveness, Second Chances, Inspired by Mamma Mia! (Movies) Teen Pregnancy, Mpreg, mention of miscarriage, Birth Trauma, amniotic fluid embolism)

Until The End by abCEE (M, 365k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, war changes people, resulting to OOC, no pinning, Established Relationship, Mpreg, Good Uncle LQR, a little grey LWJ, a bit of JC bashing from LWJ, BAMF JYL, 16 years of yearning, mainly CQL verse but has scenes from the novel as well, LSZ is WangXian’s Child, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Canon Rewrite, Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts)

~*~

16. Hi I’m looking for any fics where Wangxian basically have Jiang Yanli and Jin Zixuan’s story. Like, Wangxian are the ones arranged to be married but they hurt / misunderstand each other etc. I remember seeing a fic like this one time but I never ended up reading it…

forever is home (with you) by moonsteps (T, 23k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Canon Divergence, Intimacy, Sharing a Bed, Strangers to Lovers, the inherent romance of the forehead ribbon)

🔒 In Agreement by kuro (T, 9k, WangXian, LXC & LWJ, Arranged Marriage, Canon Divergence, Fluff, Mutual Pining, Domestic Fluff, Developing Relationship)

the river and the sea by sasamelons (T, 7k, WangXian, Soulmates, Arranged Marriage, Misunderstandings, Angst with a Happy Ending, Idiots in Love, Falling In Love, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, Mutual Pining)

🔒 Only with Time by adrian_kres (E, 66k, WangXian, WIP, Arranged Marriage, Modern with Magic, fast then slow burn, Mutual Pining, they each sort of think it's unrequited love, it's complicated, possible dubcon depending on your interpretation of events, please see the author's note for chapter 3, Hurt No Comfort, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, but it does eventually get better! promise!, WangXian Endgame, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, it is from the past only, no one is actively self-harming in this fic, unless you count the characters being really hard on themselves from time to time, often with good reason, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse)

~*~

17. Itmf ur fav diverging aus!

🧡 Dispersing Clouds by dreamingofcake (E, 283k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Not Jiang Family Friendly, Abusive YZY, Canonical Child Abuse, Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Eventual Sex, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm (Background Character), Background Character Deaths, child deaths, Canon JC, Good Uncle LQR, Accidental Baby Acquisition, Cultivation Sect Politics, Homophobia, Heteronormativity, Feelings Realization, WWX is Not Oblivious) I swear I'm not a paid sponsor for Dispersing Clouds despite recommending it frequently. It's just that great of a divergent AU!

We Meet at the Thousandth Step by Admiranda, Rynne (T, 316k, WangXian, CSSR/WCZ, Canon Divergence, No Sunshot Campaign, CSSR & WCZ Live, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Different First Meeting, Night Hunts, Genius WWX, Inventor WWX, Plot, Romance, Drama, Fluff, Strangers to married, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Unresolved Romantic Tension, Everyone Lives, Developing Relationship, Minor Violence, Case Fic, Mystery, Flirting, WWX’s Canon-Typical Flower Flirting, Arson, There Was Only One Bed, Getting Together, First Kiss, Meeting the Parents, Resolved Sexual Tension, Resolved Romantic Tension, WWX Is a Good Big Brother, New Relationship Bliss, Chinese Mythology & Folklore, Blood and Injury, Yiling siblings, Married WangXian, Honeymoon, Wangxian’s Baby Fever)

Lay my body down by tawaen (M, 48k, WWX & WQ, WWX & WN, wangxian, WWX & JYL, Canon Divergence, Time Travel, Rogue Cultivator WWX, Eventual WangXian, No Golden Core Transfer, Not Cultivation World Friendly, Canon-Typical Violence, Not JC Friendly, What if WWX saw the first siege of the burial mounds and said Nope to the war, OCs, OC point-of-view for one chapter for plot reasons)

💖 Ghosts Shouldn't by ShanaStoryteller (Not rated, 15k, wangxian, canon divergence, grief/mourning, angst w happy ending)

Weep You No More, Sad Fountains by athena_crikey (T, 59k, WangXian, LXC & LWJ, LXC & JGY, Canon Divergence, Fix-it fic, Whump, Curses, Fever, Delirium, Stabbing, Loneliness, Confessions, LWJ’s emotional repression, WWX giving everything as always, LXC realising sympathy is not support, LQR Being an Asshole)

~*~

If you didn’t get an answer to your ask here, don’t forget to make use of @mdzs-kinkmeme and MDZS KINK MEME on Dreamwidth. Authors actually do use them for ideas. You may get what you order!***Your prompt doesn’t have to be kink! Fluff, crack, whatever - it’s all good!***

#wangxian #mdzs #wangxian fic recs #i'm in the mood for a fic #the untamed #wangxian fic search #wangxianficfinder #long post

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rottenpumpkin13 · 24 days ago

Note

What do AGSZ do whenever Cloud's low self esteem reaches really bad levels?

Genesis: Slumps into a chair beside him and starts listing his own perceived inadequacies to make Cloud feel better about his. "My left eyebrow is slightly higher than my right. I've never successfully made toast without burning it. I still don't understand how laundry cycles work. The sight of Sephiroth succeeding makes me want to fling myself from the plate."

Cloud starts feeling a little better until Genesis veers into "And sometimes I dabble in treason and arson, like the time I…" Cloud finds himself filing away mental evidence for what's definitely going to be a future investigation.

Sephiroth: Appears with a laptop and a 47-slide presentation titled "A Comprehensive Analysis on Why Cloud Strife's Self-Perception Is Statistically Incorrect." It's complete with graphs comparing Cloud's achievements to the average SOLDIER failure rate, "Statistical Improbability of Being 'Bad at Everything," and a particularly detailed section on why spending time with his mother might improve his mental health. He concluded that section with "not that I would know."

Zack: Becomes the enemy of negativity. He follows Cloud around and hypes up every single little thing he does like Cloud's own personal cheerleader. He'll sit across from him in the mess hall, banging his fists on the table as they eat dinner with "Yeah Cloud! Look at you slurp up that spaghetti! You rock, man!" He'll interrupt mission briefings to point out how Cloud is "paying attention so well!" and absolutely loses his shit whenever they spar and Cloud wins against him. He had to cut it out when he attempted to set off fireworks indoors to "celebrate Cloud's awesomeness."

Angeal: He makes tea and listens to Cloud's existential crisis with the patience of someone who's dealt with Genesis' insecurities and ramblings for years. He'll occasionally nod and offer wisdom before steering the conversation back to how being human means sometimes feeling like a complete disaster, and that's perfectly fine. All is well until Cloud mentions being bullied.

Suddenly Angeal produces his sword with a velocity that makes Cloud yelp, and "wants to go settle this like men—even if it means breaking someone's knees."

#ff7 #final fantasy 7 #ffvii #sephiroth #final fantasy vii #genesis rhapsodos #ff7 crisis core #angeal hewley #zack fair #crisis core #cloud strife

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these-written-reveries · 5 months ago

Text

Selfish (katsuki ver.)

‣ Pairing: Katsuki x GN!Reader

‣ Genre: Flangst, Hurt/Comfort

‣ Summary: Katsuki is convinced that you are in love with Eijirou, and not him. He tries to do what he thinks is right by keeping his feelings suppressed and hidden from you, instead of trying to get between the happiness of the two people he cares about the most. His plan quickly begins to fall apart the moment you confront him, and his selfish urges take over.

‣ Warnings: Angst, Katsuki being sad and having low self-esteem, false unrequited love, making out, Reader uses the “girl’s” elevator (but we can just pretend gender plays no part in the placement of the dorm rooms in this scenario), the word “fuck” is used a lot, repeated use of "noose" metaphor? idk

‣ Word Count: 5,798

‣ A/N: There is a Kiribaku x Reader version of this here, if you’re interested!

Main Masterlist

Katsuki Bakugou was a selfish man.

He had begrudgingly accepted this truth a long time ago. Despite how it appeared on the surface, he was quite self-aware. Sure, it didn’t require that much self-reflection to figure it out, considering he’d been told this very truth by others around him multiple times throughout his life—at least by the ones that were brave enough to do so—but that’s beside the point. He still came to be aware of it, one way or another.

He could remember the early days of his youth as a spoiled, entitled brat. Even before his quirk developed, he always poised himself as superior to others. He was as selfish as they came. Throwing fits when he didn’t get his way, hurting people around him to ease the raging storm of feelings that were too big for his little body, always stealing the spotlight from others, expecting praise and rewards for every little thing he did. Kids are inherently selfish, to some degree, but little Katsuki blew every kid in his grade out of the water, in this regard.

Things didn’t improve all that much as he grew older, but he did get a little better. At least he no longer threw tantrums over not getting ice cream after school or every time he was told “no.” And he no longer sought praise for merely breathing. He preferred to truly earn his title as “the best” at whatever he decided to do—even if that meant knocking some other kids down to get there faster. A minor improvement, but his selfish nature was still wildly out of control. Even when he did recognize it, he didn’t care enough to fix it. He was already seen as an asshole; what was the point in trying to change the minds of people he saw as below him?

It wasn’t until he broke free of his ass-kissing, follower friends and met you and the other friends “extras” from his class at UA that he finally began to really see and care about his selfish ways—especially how they affected the people he truly respected and cared about. Katsuki wasn’t devoid of a heart, despite what many people believed. He wasn’t incapable of feeling remorse for his actions and of learning how to be a better person. He just never had the proper tools or guidance to be able to grow into the person that he, deep down, wanted to be.

That, and he didn’t have the same motivation before as he suddenly did when you stepped into his life. You pushed him to be better, just by being yourself. Katsuki was inspired by you from the moment he met you. The way you carried yourself and the way you managed to handle him and all that came with being his friend. It only made him respect you more. And as he inevitably began to fall for you, he felt the desire to be a better person for you grow even stronger. He wanted to prove to you that he was worth keeping around, even if he wasn’t always “the best” at everything. The last thing he wanted was to lose you over his problematic ways.

To his luck, you were one of the most tolerant people he had ever met. That didn’t mean you never called him out on his shit, though. Katsuki deeply valued you for that. He had grown to be more open and accepting of critical feedback, specifically if it came from you. How could he become a great hero, never mind a great man, if he refused any and all feedback that wasn’t positive?

That said, it still wasn’t easy for him to so easily accept when he was wrong. And it was even more difficult for him to push past his pride enough to apologize for it. But all it took was one look from you to make him give in and do just that. How you managed to gain such power over him, he’d never understand. If he wasn’t so damn in love with you, he’d hate you for it.

He still hated you for it. But in a “fuck you for making me love you so much” kind of way.

If it wasn't for his internal commitment to be a better person—one that you could be proud to know—he would have given into his selfish urges, stolen your heart, and claimed it as his a long time ago.

Katsuki had quickly come to learn that being a good person sucks.

“Oh, Eiji texted. He said he’ll be here soon! I invited him. Figured you wouldn’t mind. He said he needs all the help he can get for this upcoming exam,” you said as you began typing a message back to him.

“Fucking hell.”

“Huh?”

You looked up at Katsuki after hearing him grumble something unintelligible under his breath. His eyes met yours for only a brief moment before he averted his gaze, gesturing to the open books in front of you.

“Nothing. Get back to studying! Do you wanna pass that exam, or what?”

You threw your head back as you groaned. “Can’t we just take a little break? Eiji’s not even here yet and we have so much time left to work on this!”

Katsuki pointed his pen at you. “You might have time, but I don’t. You’re lucky I’m even using my spare time to help you idiots with this!”

You rolled your eyes. “You wanted to study for this test too. And you’re the one always preaching about how it’s important to take breaks!”

Before he could respond, you shut your book and looked at him inquisitively.

“So…what were you thinking about before? You looked…more annoyed than usual. Am I annoying you?”

“What the hell do you mean? I don’t look like anything!”

He could see you trying to stifle a laugh, though behind it was a glint of concern in your eyes.

“You look like something is really bothering you, is all.”

“Yeah. You are! Shut up and get back to work,” he growled, though you felt no real malice behind it. You had quickly learned long ago not to take the hotheaded blonde’s rude attitude seriously, often times finding it to be more of a protective shield than anything else.

“Okay, whatever you say,” you said, holding your hands up defensively with a slightly amused smirk on your face. Katsuki huffed in response as he looked away.

Giggling at his strange, yet all too familiar behavior, you opened your textbook again, only to be distracted less than a minute later by another ding from your phone. Katsuki could already tell it was another text from Eijirou by the way you smiled at your screen when you read it. You only ever smiled like that when reading the redhead’s messages, much to Katsuki’s chagrin.

“Fuck you,” Katsuki thought as he stared at you from across the table, frustration and hurt bubbling within his chest.

The truth was, you had the strange ability to make his heart flutter and his stomach do flips and his hands sweat like crazy and fill his brain with so many thoughts of you, he couldn’t focus on anything else. You did all this just by existing as your stupidly beautiful, perfect self.

You even made him feel this way when you looked your “worst”. Beaten up after a bad fight, sleep deprived with bags under your eyes, after—very ungracefully—shoving a giant serving of food into your mouth, just waking up with messy hair and crusty eyes and morning breath, sick with snot constantly leaking out of your nose. All of this, and he was still head over heels, swooning over you like a fool. And dammit, did it piss him off.

Even worse, he knew you had feelings for his redheaded friend and not him. He couldn’t blame you for this. He was a damn lovable idiot. A good guy, all around. The kind of man Katsuki wished he could be more like.

He couldn’t blame Eijirou for loving you either. As far as he was concerned, how could anyone not fall for you?

Katsuki loved your entire personality—even the parts that frustrated him most. Especially those parts. On top of that, you were absolutely gorgeous. When he begrudgingly thought of you and Eijirou together, he couldn’t deny that the two of you would make an amazing couple—looks-wise and personality-wise.

It infuriated him to no end. He wanted to hate you both, push you away, relocate somewhere far away so that he’d no longer have to bear the pain of seeing the two of you flirting together, laughing at each other’s jokes, hugging one another, and inevitably doing all the things that couples do. All the things that Katsuki wanted so desperately to do with you.

But he couldn’t, no matter how hard he tried. There was no way he could bring himself to not only truly hate you, but to go on living life without you. He would likely never admit it, but you had become so interwoven in his life and his heart, that an existence without you just seemed so bleak and empty.

So, as much as it pained him to sit through hangouts and study sessions and the like, all while bearing witness to how close, how touchy, how obviously in love, you were with Eijirou and not him, he chose to stick around and keep his mouth shut. He could have pulled the “dibs” card if he wanted to with Eijirou; tell him he loved you first, so he better back off and let him have you. But that wasn't what a good person would do. So instead, he made a solemn promise to himself not to utter a word about his feelings for you, ever.

For once, he saw exactly what he wanted, right in front of him, and he chose not to take it. He chose not to ruin whatever closeness he did have with you. But more importantly, he chose not to ruin you and Eijirou’s chances at finding the happiness that you both deserved, far more than he did.

It was the most selfless thing he’d ever done. And it was the hardest thing he’d ever done too. He felt his heart break every time he saw the affectionate way you treated Eijirou, but he bit his tongue. He tried to shove his feelings down deeper and deeper, but they kept coming back up, tightening around his throat like a noose until he choked.

The truth became quite apparent to him at one point. Loving you from afar would be his undoing. And maybe he deserved it? Maybe this was his punishment for being an asshole and tearing others down for his own benefit for all those years.

He’d take his punishment. Just so long as he could continue to know you, even if he wanted to know you so much more.

God, he fucking loved hated you.

After the previous day’s study session, Katsuki needed a break from the two of you. He planned to spend most of the day training and holed up in his dorm, just to avoid you as much as possible; to set his mind straight and get his feelings back where they belonged—locked away in a dark unlabeled box in his mind, along with all of his other unwanted thoughts and feelings. He was starting to lose his composure around you, and when that happened, he always tried to stay out of your way for a few days until he was “fine” again.

“Fine” had lost all its meaning months ago, and yet, he found himself saying it all too often.

“You okay, Kats? You’re not really on your A game today,” you said as you walked over to help him off the ground for the second time that day.

Katsuki scoffed, a low growl brewing in his throat as he spoke. “I’m fuckin’ fine. Wasn’t planning on having you idiots around, distracting me.”

You and Eijirou seemed to have the same idea about working out and training that day. Katsuki ran into you both on his way to the gym. Almost turned around and booked it back to the dorms, but you happened to see him and waved him over to join the two of you. You smiled happily as you greeted him. It pissed him off so much, but he couldn’t say no to you when you looked so damn cute, asking him to join you with those pretty eyes sparkling as they looked up at him.

He wanted to curse you out. Tell you to fuck off and leave him alone.

Get out of his fucking head, already! Stop torturing him with that fucking adorable smile that made his heart clench in his chest! Stop being so fucking nice to him!

But he bit his tongue, salvaged whatever little composure and willpower he had left, and joined you both to train.

And he fucking sucked the whole time. It only added to his inner turmoil even more. He was too distracted. Too focused on you and the way you looked so fucking good when you were focused, when you had sweat dripping down your skin, when you were looking at him with those determined eyes while sparring, when you didn’t hold back against him.

At least you were more focused on him than Eijirou, at the moment. Katsuki had insisted that you both took turns going against him until he kicked both of your asses. He was on round three, at this point. He had lost to you both a total of three times in a row.

He knew that you and Eijirou were starting to question his strange behavior lately. He practically stormed out of his own dorm the day prior during your study session together. He didn’t say a word. Just got up and left.

Why?

Because you and Eijirou. That’s why.

When he came back, things were awkward as the two of you tried to ask him about it. He didn’t look at either of you when he told you to leave, not wanting you to see his red, glossy eyes.

It was embarrassing, to feel this weak.

Eijirou knocked on his door later that evening to talk to him. He didn’t answer.

Now the two of you were obviously trying to pretend that everything was normal, for his sake; trying to gently coax whatever was bothering him out of his system in hopes that he’d come around and get out of whatever shitty headspace he was in. You were being good friends, like usual. Always so attentive and thoughtful and caring.

He wanted to scream.

This time, he managed to defeat Eijirou, but he could tell his moves were slightly slower. He was going fucking easy on him. The redhead giving him a pity win only managed to send Katsuki over the edge.

By the time it was your turn, he wasn’t even fully present in his body anymore. All he was focused on was winning one round. Just one solid win was all he needed.

He moved on autopilot, blocking and countering all your attacks swiftly as they came. Thankfully, you weren’t holding back. For a moment, he felt like he was finally winning at something. The suffocating feelings began to dissipate as the adrenaline high began to kick in, filling him with a sense of power and control.

Until you called for a pause.

“What the fuck! Why?!” he barked, smoke wafting off of his hot hands.

Eijirou held a hand out at him, signaling him to back off as he ran towards you. “Chill the fuck out man, they're hurt!”

“Huh?”

It was only then that he realized you were holding your weight on one leg, struggling to keep yourself balanced as you tried to stand on your own. Eijirou was quick to catch you before you fell.

You had an ugly burn on your leg from one of his explosions. He thought he had released it far enough away from you to dodge it. He was clearly wrong.

Katsuki’s head was fuzzy as he stared at you, frozen in place. Eijirou inspected your wound, offering you sweet words of comfort and praise as he carefully wrapped it with gauze.

Damn it.

Katsuki could barely breathe now. The noose growing tight around his throat again.

“Come on, little hero. Let’s get you to Recovery Girl.” Eijirou lifted you up into his arms with ease, carrying you out of sight.

Your little whimper of pain shot straight through his heart.

Fuck.

“Come on, Katsuki!” Eijirou called out to him, slight urgency in his voice.

Katsuki remained frozen where he stood, hands clenched and chest heaving as he tried to fight back the tears that were building in his eyes. A million thoughts and feelings swirled inside of him, threatening to burst through the seams of his being.

“Kats?” Your voice sounded distant. It echoed in the background of his mind before it fully reached him.

“Go on without me,” was all he could say. He cringed at the way his voice wavered when he said it.

“Come on, man. You should-”

“Go!” Katsuki yelled, interrupting Eijirou’s attempt to change his mind.

All he heard after that was the sound of Eijirou’s footsteps as they faded away.

You and Eijirou had tried to reach out to Katsuki for four days. He somehow managed to avoid the two of you at every turn. He mostly stayed locked up in his dorm when school wasn’t in session. All calls went to voicemail. All texts left on read.

You even went as far as to try to get Sero or Mina to check in on him. Denki offered to give it a shot, but you declined. You knew he’d probably only aggravate him more, despite his best intentions.

Every plan of yours failed.

You missed your best friend. And despite Eijirou’s reassuring comments to you that he would come back soon, that he just needed some space, you were starting to crumble under the fear that maybe he wouldn’t. He had been acting strange lately, even before the most recent event occurred.

What if you had upset him? What if he was tired of being your friend? What if you were holding him back somehow?

Your thoughts spun in circles in your mind until you began to feel dizzy and sick to your stomach. After tossing and turning for hours that night, you headed down to the kitchen to make yourself some tea in hopes that it’d finally help you quiet your mind enough to allow you to get some much-needed sleep.

Thankfully, it did, because by the time Katsuki walked into the room to get some water after he couldn't sleep, you were passed out with your head on the table, your hair sprawled out messily around you and your half-empty mug of cold tea.

You looked beautiful.

“Fuck you,” Katsuki cursed you in his head as he stared down at your hunched over, sleeping form.

The common room was so quiet this late at night, he could clearly hear your little breaths with every rise and fall of your chest. You had drool slightly dripping out of one side of your parted lips and your cute fluffy bunny slippers on your feet—the ones he got for you that one day at the mall.

The sight made his heart flutter.

He huffed in a mixture of sadness and frustration as he turned to walk away, only to stop himself in his tracks after a few steps. He took one look back at you over his shoulder before sighing in defeat.

Walking closer, he worked up the courage to wake you and subsequently face you for the first time in four days. What came out was much more aggressive than he intended.

“Oi!”

You jumped and his heart clenched slightly. He bit the inside of his cheek as you looked up at him, sleepy and confused.

“Ka’ski?” your sweet voice, thick with sleep, filled his ears. He clenched his fists, the bitter taste of blood filling his mouth.

“Go to your dorm. You’re gonna end up with a fucked up neck and back sleeping like that, idiot.”

He began to walk away after that, heading towards the elevator at the end of the room. He didn’t get far, though. The unpleasant screech of a chair on the hard floor, followed by the far more pleasant feeling of your hand wrapped around his wrist stopped him right in his tracks.

“Wait!”

“Go to bed, Y/N,” Katsuki warned. The last thing he wanted was to have whatever conversation you were attempting to start with him.

“No. I can’t sleep, anyway. I just keep worrying about you. Please. Just tell me what’s wrong and what I can do to fix it,” you implored.

Katsuki was tense under your grip, but he didn’t try to pull away, even as he let out a loud huff of frustration.

“Just fuck off, okay? There’s nothing you can do.”

You stared at the back of his head with so much pain and sadness in your eyes. Katsuki could feel your gaze on him. He knew better than to look back at you. That look alone would break his heart more than anything else could.

“I won’t ever stop trying, Katsuki. I care about you so much. I miss you so badly. Please, just talk to me.” Your voice was starting to waver slightly as you spoke. Katsuki hated himself for being the reason behind your sadness and tears.

Even still, he couldn’t let you in on this. He just needed more time to sort out his feelings and lock them away, where they belonged. But after four days, he was still struggling to get himself back in order. All of it was starting to consume him, distract him, make him perform badly as a student and a hero in training. That part only encouraged him to avoid you even more. He wasn’t going to let stupid feelings ruin everything he had worked so hard for.

His silence only pushed you to speak again.

“Katsuki?”

“No.” He pulled away from your grip, but you reached out to grab him again.

“Katsuki, please!”

He spun around to face you, eyes brimming with tears as he yelled in your face.

“What?! You just can't leave shit alone, can you?! Just fuck off, already!”

You looked at him with heartbroken eyes, biting your lower lip to suppress its quivering as tears began to fall down your face.

Fuck.

Katsuki inhaled sharply as his broken and battered heart shattered to pieces in his chest. Both of you were silent as you stared at one another, unsure of how to progress the conversation without breaking into a fit of tears.

“Fuck, I’m…I’m sorry,” Katsuki mumbled, voice barely audible as he looked down at the ground between you. “Just leave me be, okay? You and Eijirou are better off without me, anyway.”

He pulled away from your grip and this time, you didn’t reach for him again. However, your voice still followed him as he walked further away from you.

“How could you say that? You mean the world to us, Kats! You’re our best friend! We need you. I need you. If this is about the other day, just forget about it. I’m fine. All is forgiven-”

“It’s not just about that.” He stopped in his tracks once more, back facing you.

“Then what is it about? Are you mad at me or Eijirou?”

Katsuki shook his head. Your confusion and desperation drew you closer to him. His feet remained glued to the floor.

“You’re not mad?”

“I-“ Katsuki stopped himself. “Just fuck off, Y/N. I’m not going to talk about it.”

“Why not?”

“Because!”

“Katsuki!”

"BECAUSE I- ugh!" he growled, "because it would be selfish of me to tell you! It’d only make things worse! I'm trying to be...fucking better than that."

You opened your mouth to speak, but he continued.

“It was selfish of me to stick around as long as I did. I should’ve just left the two of you be a long time ago. I thought I could-” He sighed. “Never mind. Point is, it’s gone too far. You even got hurt because of my stupid bullshit.”

“What has gone too far? Katsuki, stop talking like this. You’re not going anywhere. Let’s just sit down and talk this out.” There was a clear presence of fear in your tone as you reached out to grab his left hand that was clenched in a tight fist at his side.

He ripped himself away from you. “No. This conversation is over.”

The way he spoke, his voice quiet, lacking any of his usual attitude, made your stomach twist in knots. He sounded so sad, so weak, so defeated. It was completely unlike him, and it scared the shit out of you.

“I give you full permission to be selfish! Just fucking look at me! Tell me what’s wrong!” you begged.

At this point, you were seconds away from getting on your knees just to get his attention, or at the very least, pity. You couldn’t let him walk out of this room. You knew the chances of getting him to open up to you again after this were slim to none. This was it. You had to fight harder; show him you weren’t giving up on him, no matter how hard he pushed you away.

Katsuki was silent, but you could see the way his hands trembled at his sides; his head hung low, his chest heaving. You waited with bated breath behind him, praying he wouldn’t walk away.

Surprisingly, after what felt like a millennium, he turned to face you, his eyes still focused on the floor.

You were scared to make the wrong move, as if you were faced with a small, wounded animal that could scurry off if you so much as breathed the wrong way.

“Kats?” you whispered softly. “It’s okay.”

He shook his head. “No. It’s not.”

“Why do you say that? Katsuki, look at me.” You stepped forward and raised your hand, gently lifting his chin up so you could finally meet his eyes. What you saw broke your heart.

Red eyes glossed over with tears, lower lip trembling as he tried and failed to stifle the emotions that seemed to overtake him. Your eyes only filled with more tears of your own as you stared back at him sadly.

“I don’t want to see you happy without me,” he whispered, breaking the silence between the two of you.

Your brow furrowed in confusion. “What?”

“I want to be the reason you are happy. I want to give you everything you deserve and more.”

“Katsuki…You do make me happy. If anything, I am the least happy when you’re not around,” you said, fingers tracing down his wrist and giving his hand a small squeeze once he allowed you to grasp it. He only seemed to grow more upset at this as he looked down at your interlocked hands.

“But you don’t want me, you want him.”

“What are you talking about? Of course, I wa-” You froze as realization hit you. “Wait…”

Katsuki made a tsk sound. "Looks like you finally got it. Took you long enough."

You blinked at him. "I- Kats, if you have something to tell me, you better say it now."

"I think you know. Why don't you tell me?"

He was too scared to say it and you knew it.

"Katsuki-"

"Tell me."

You sighed, suddenly growing nervous as you began to second-guess if what you were about to say was actually correct. Katsuki's hold on your hand grew tighter as he awaited your answer. If he wasn't so focused on what you were about to say, he'd be embarrassed about the growing dampness between your palms.

"I...do you....do you have...feelings....for me?"

Katsuki’s silence was all the confirmation you needed. You let out a breath of relief.

“Kats-”

“Do you?” he asked, before clarifying. “Have feelings for me? If the answer is ‘no’, say it now and we’ll never speak about it again.”

You stepped closer to him, slippers touching his as you looked at him with soft eyes.

"What if the answer is ‘yes’?" you whispered.

For a moment, you both exchanged glances between eyes and lips, your hearts racing as you awaited the other’s move.

Finally, Katsuki spoke.

"Do I still have permission to be selfish?"

You nodded, and before you knew it, his hands were on either side of your face, and his lips were crashing against yours.

He pushed you against the nearby wall, never breaking his lips from yours, as he kissed you hungrily, desperately, lovingly. You ran your fingernails up the nape of his neck, weaving your fingers through his messy blond locks and earning a groan from him as he pulled you closer by your hips and deepened the kiss even more.

By the time he came up for air, you were both panting heavily. His grip on your hips didn’t loosen and neither did yours around his neck as you stared at each other speechlessly.

After a moment, your lips formed into a smile.

“Dumbass,” you teased.

Katsuki’s soft smile quickly faded into a bewildered frown. “Hah?”

“Eijirou is like a brother to me. I want you, Katsuki. It’s always been you. I love you.”

Katsuki visibly stopped breathing for a brief moment. You nervously continued to speak.

“I’ve been wanting to tell you, and Eijirou has been encouraging me to, but every time I tried, you stormed off, or were clearly out of it, so I was too nervous to bring it up.”

Katsuki growled. You looked at him, confused.

“What? Just say it,” you said.

“Fuck you!” he cursed.

You gasped. “Hey! Watch it, mister!”

“Fuck you for ruining my life by making me love you so goddamn much! And fuck you for not telling me sooner about your weird sibling dynamic and feelings for me and letting me suffer! Do you have any idea how painful it has been watching the two of you idiots and your stupid cutesy, touchy, flirty bullshit, every single day?!” he ranted, obviously frustrated, but not truly directed at you.

“First of all, we weren’t flirting. Also, I didn’t realize-”

“’Course you didn’t! I always thought you’d never return my feelings because it seemed obvious that you were obsessed with him.”

This time, he sounded sad. You cupped his face with your hands, gently running your thumbs over his soft cheeks.

“I have always been obsessed with you, Kats. Only you. It’s not that I didn’t want to be more forward and obvious with my affections for you, I was just never quite sure about your feelings for me and I didn’t want to cross any lines or make you uncomfortable,” you explained.

He let out a sigh, eyes closing as he relaxed into your touch.

“We should talk more about this tomorrow. Probably let Eijirou in on this too,” you said.

He nodded in agreement, soaking up the feeling of your touch; something he had dreamed of and desperately craved for so long. Finally, his dreams were coming true. He was melting between the palms of your hands, and he couldn't have been happier about it.

Now that he'd had a taste, he'd be damned if he were to ever let you go.

“You’re mine now. Got it?” he said, his hands slightly squeezing your hips as he looked into your eyes.

You smirked amusingly at him. “Woah there, don’t get too selfish now.”

Katsuki narrowed his eyes at you, his lips forming into an angry pout.

“Kidding! Don’t get your panties in a twist,” you said, giggling at the look on his face. You knew he hated it when you said that. You were just asking for trouble.

“That’s it! Get over here!” he said, reaching for your face as he tried to kiss you again.

If this was how he chose to punish you for teasing him, you weren’t complaining.

You laughed into the kiss before melting into him completely, allowing him to pull you even closer against him, his strong arms keeping you locked in place. The kiss quickly grew more tender as he savored every second of your soft lips on his.

You placed a hand on his chest at one point, signaling that you needed air. He grunted before reluctantly pulling away.

He pressed his forehead against yours, smirking at the way you grew visibly flustered under his intensely loving gaze.

“It’s late. W-We should get to bed."

He hummed in response. “Fine.”

Taking your hand, he walked you over to the elevator across the room, both of you still silently processing all that had just happened until you finally reached the large metal doorway.

You stepped inside the elevator, bidding him goodnight.

“Night,” he said, turning around and beginning to walk away.

His feet came to a halt when he felt a sudden, familiar urge take over him, and this time, he didn’t fight it. Before he knew it, he had his arm between the metal doors, forcing them to reopen.

“Kats-”

He interrupted you by crashing his lips against yours once more, cradling your face in his hands as he kissed you with everything he had. Every skipped beat of his heart, every pang in his stomach, every moment of longing, every loving thought he’d ever had of you flashed through his mind. For once, he wasn’t concerned about ruining anything, of hurting anyone, of losing you. All he cared about was satisfying the insufferable itch of longing and desire he’d carried for you all this time.

Finally, the noose was gone, the bad feelings dissipating while the others became one with his being. He could breathe again.

When he pulled away, he was smiling. He was happy.

And you were too. Happy because of him. Happy with him.

“You should be selfish more often,” you said, still trying to catch your breath.

Katsuki stopped the doors from closing in on him, his eyes still locked on you as he let out a chuckle.

“That’s a first. Be careful what you wish for, sweetheart.”

He backed out of the elevator, finally allowing the doors to close. You stared at him as heat rushed to your face, capturing a glimpse of his growing smirk until he was no longer in sight.

Katsuki Bakugou was a selfish man.

And oh, did you love every bit of him.

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