colbyflask

[colbyflask]

oops - a prelude

so i literally made this blog(?) three months and ten days ago and then never touched it again, in classic me fashion. Isn't that hilarious?? in the time since then, I got laid off from my job (exactly two months ago!!), I saw paramore in concert, flew to a city that is 3 hours away by car to dog-sit (the flight was 30 minutes - yes i am in my taylor swift era), and went to a wedding. these are probably the most life-altering things that happened to me in those three months. that's literally a whole fiscal quarter, I think. but this blog (again - is that what this is???) isn't about that. it's about me listening to music.

The only things I have turned on for my ear holes to listen to since February (how tf do you spell that??) are paramore and gorillaz (and the new fall out boy album but not as extensively). i do not think i am emotionally ready to capture the perfection that is paramore's discography in my dum dum words, so i want to start with gorillaz (since their music is kind of what kickstarted this whole writing experiment tbh).

when I started this thing, I think I had only listened to 3 of their seven albums. That number is now up to five. My initial plan was to go song-by-song on their self titled album, but I'm not going to do that anymore (like I will eventually, but that's not what I want to start with). I have now decided that I will start with what I'm currently listening to - the now now. That's such a funny name for an album (and is also why I didn't listen to it for a while LOL).

I want to tell you (yes, you - the person reading this) how I even started listening to gorillaz (also my brother and I have a joke where we call them "the gorillaz" but then we say it in funny voice so every time I type it, that's what I'm thinking of). I want to say I've always been aware of them (or at least their music, not necessarily their lore or concept). Clint Eastwood would come on one of the radio stations I would listen to in high school pretty often, and I had heard Feel Good Inc. at some point throughout the years. I absolutely saw people wearing the demon days shirts. While I enjoyed the music when we crossed paths, I never really dug any deeper. I do have a faint memory of checking out their music videos and being a bit put off by the animation (I think it was 2-D's eyes that creeped me out) and kind of put it on the back burner until last year (in hindsight, it was probably for the best that I didn't start listening until I was an adult because I would've been absolutely insufferable with it). also - the animation/art style has really grown on me. It fits with who the characters are, and I love how it's evolved since their conception.

The beginning is a little hazy, but I know it started with hearing Clint Eastwood again on the radio. It was as if the spirit of Del possessed me - after that, I had it on repeat on Spotify. I have this thing where I don't like to not know the words of songs (it might be fall out boy trauma, or maybe it's the lingering of perfectionism I like to say I've gotten over but totally haven't), and I listened to it over and over until I got most of the words down. I peeped over to their artist page, and did the same exact thing with Feel Good Inc. (it's quite honestly one of my favorite singles of all time and I have yet to get sick of it). I think I also listened to dirty harry a few times because of that one tiktok trend with the outfits (I hate how central tiktok is to this because I like to think I am not online as much as I am, but alas, here I am). This is the part where it gets hazy - Cracker Island (the song). I could not tell you how or when I first heard it (it was probably a youtube tiktok short), but when I did, I was absolutely obsessed. It was one of those rare moments where an artist captures so much of what you like on a single track. I wanted more, but I (stupidly) didn't seek it out.

Last year, Spotify wrapped did a silly goofy thing where your favorite/most listened to artists (that recorded a video) would popup and say "hey thanks for listening this year." Scrolling through mine made sense, until I saw a weird looking green man on my screen. Although I had only listened to like four songs, I listened enough to have gorillaz say thank you to me at the end of the year (and to promote their new album, of course). This is one of the few times where I feel like the word flabbergasted really describes my true emotion - first of all, had I really listened enough to make this green dude appear?? Second, who IS this green dude?? Third, WHY IS HE BRITISH??? If you're curious, this is the video in question. Knowing what I know now, this was honestly perfect marketing. It fits in SO well with what the band is and what their newest art is conveying. I showed this video to people and was like "what in the world IS this??" and then we laughed - we laughed into the new year.

And into the new year we went. Cracker Island came out sometime in February (that's kind of an iconic month for me now, huh?), and I could not tell you when I decided to listen to the whole thing. I don't remember if it was that month or in March, but boy am I glad I listened to it. Part of the appeal to me was it's name - why is this song and album called cracker island??? I had to figure that out (and whether or not I found out will be revealed in that review...).

After watching the two music videos for Cracker Island, I began to have questions. Who were these four people that composed this band? What's their story?? Why do they look like that?? Who is really making this music??? What in the world was happening in the Cracker Island and Silent Running music videos??? Who is this green guy and why did he kiss that old lady??? Luckily for me, this video popped up in my YouTube recommended and began to unravel some of the mystery. By the end of it, I was hooked. I wanted to know the history behind these four strangers. I wanted to know how all of this worked. And that's how I started listening to Gorillaz.

The first thing I had to figure out what everyone's name was - it took me a little bit to sort out the names and their instrumental roles (the green guy is called Murdoc??? and he was replaced by that guy from the Powerpuff Girls for an album??? what??? who is Paula Cracker??). I scoured wikipedia, read their brief character biographies, and had more questions than answers. What the hell is a phase??? Noodle shipped herself in a Fedex box?? why is there a 7 year gap between albums??? how did they make these albums???

tangent here - I used to play guitar hero as a kid (who didn't??) and on one of my favorite songs to play was song 2 by blur on bass. it took me an embarrassing amount of time to figure out that the singer of blur was the same dude from the gorillaz. like, I think I figured it out last year. what the heck. anyway it's one of my favorite fun facts.

In my research, I learned of the importance of an album called Plastic Beach. From YouTube comments to Wikipedia reviews, I deduced that it's their magnum opus. As a result, I decided I wanted to save that album for last. The listening order for the rest of them was a bit more variable. Here's what my listening order is/likely to be.

Demon Days (2005): after seeing it on so many shirts (that's a joke - it's because it was the album with feel good inc. and dirty harry), I figured I start off strong with this one. I 100% made the right choice

The Fall (2010): in my research i learned that this was a weird one, and I was too scared to start with anything else. I was bored at work (back when I still had a job lol) and put it on in the background. I still need more time with it, but it's still pretty solid. More to come.

Gorillaz (2001): This album is so fun - and it's also the only physical album I own. It was also the album I was jamming through when I decided to start this blog. I have notes written down for this one, so I'm looking forward to writing about her.

Humanz (2017): The album art on this one creeped me out (why does Murdoc look like john lennon) but the music is spectacular. I'm excited to write about this one.

The Now Now (2018): My current listen - I'll be writing about this one first!!

Song Machine (2020): One of two albums I have yet to listen to - is this even considered an album?? Like I know it is, but the song conglomeration is a little confusing to me, so I'm hoping I can figure out how to listen to it.

Plastic Beach (2010): I'm so afraid that this isn't going to live up to the hype I'm building up in my mind. But I'm also so looking forward to listening - rhinestone eyes is a provoking song that i could listen to forever and I'm anxiously anticipating listening to its relatives. I love a good concept album, and I think this is what that's supposed to be.

I'm leaving out some of the peripheral tracks (think the d-sides and laika come home) for the time being. Maybe they'll be the epilogue to this little project. I'm hoping to get this listening party done before the year is over - ideally before december. The majority of the past seven years, my top artist has been another british band that starts with a G, but this is the year they're ultimately dethroned (there was a year where a certain band that I will not name took top billing, but we're not going to talk about that because they're supposedly retired and I don't want to write about them).

I think this concludes our little prelude here - I wrote so much. It absolutely is not proofread, and i'm not starting everything out capitalized. it's not intentional or purposeful - I just didn't feel like hitting shift all the time. Until next time - I'll see you on The Now Now.

'-V

August 15, 2023

[colbyflask]

what i am doing here

listen - or actually read because you most likely aren't listening to this. if you are listening to this, why are you using text to speech?? or am I reading this out loud in the future? is there an AI out there mimicking my voice, impersonating my likeness to make an insane amount of profit? does this mean I finally got to blow up (not in the exploding sense), and act like I don't know anybody?

this little project is more like an exercise - I've been wanting to write for a long time. but not serious writing (at least not yet) - the last time I wrote something was exactly a year ago and that was a research paper for my last grade in undergrad (I got an A, like it matters). The process was terrible. Like most of my assignments, I held off for as long as I could and panic wrote in the hours leading up to the deadline. I missed those deadlines, asked for extensions, and used the pure fury of that panic to drive the assignment to completion. I pulled all-nighters, consuming terrible coffee which made me feel worse than it tasted. I couldn't feel my legs, and my head would be pounding. I ached for sleep, but my academic writing process forbid it. While my writing usually got me the grade I wanted, I wasn't satisfied with the product I produced. I always felt like I could've done more, that my arguments were weak, like I didn't know enough to put words on the page. Despite the fact that I formulated the words after hours of research and calculated planning, it wasn't enough. I felt as if I could've been doing so much more, but I just couldn't execute it. There was no joy in the process of seeking knowledge and repurposing what I'd learned, and I began to care less and less about the topics at hand. And when most of your assignments are related your interests in your chosen specialty, let's just say the process of writing becomes even more grueling. the vicious cycle continued, and I only managed to escape by removing myself from that academic environment. I won't lie to you - I want to go back someday, but I can't do it the way I did before. I really don't think I'll make it out - so I guess this project/idea is way for me rebuild before I go back. Maybe something else will come out of it, or maybe everything will be exactly the same. I can't really say .

Writing is something that I used to enjoy - crafting little non-sensical stories that were the result of either weird dreams I had or ideas that came to me after reading a book that I loved. I never got into that whole fan fiction thing (I didn't have time and I was absolutely the type that didn't want to read something if it didn't come from the "original creator." I like to think that I've grown out of that mindset a bit, but I have yet to really read any kind of fan-fiction). I've wanted to practice writing for a while, going beyond the artificial research papers or timed assignments. I don't think I've written anything fun since the fourth grade (unless you count my dumbass tweets), and I've really lacked that kind of inspiration. I wouldn't even know where to start - what even is a writing process??? Here's what I do know - I use WAYYY too many hyphens (I had a professor call me out on it once). I enjoy using them. I like to think of my writing as listening to someone's thoughts, and the hyphens are another way to convey a pause. I also know that me and writing have had a rough relationship over the past few years, which is heartbreaking because I feel like I had the potential to be a phenomenal writer. That likely sounds egotistical, and you know what? It is. If I don't say it, who will? If I don't believe that I have the potential, why should anyone else? So there it is. I want to write, and I want to be good at it. That's why I'm here. But I can't improve my writing if I don't practice, so that's why I'm here. I'm going to write about what I want to write about, and I want to share what's going on in my brain. I want to do it on my own terms. Will people read this? Again - I can't really say. If you are reading this (because I wrote a lot - sorry), thank you. My goals here are to make this an interesting experience - I want it to be entertaining, but also insightful. I don't want you to feel like you just wasted five minutes reading gibberish. I hope you (and me) will stick along for the ride.

Something I've wanted to do for a while is write about the music I like. Like musical reviews. I have absolutely no qualifications - I just want to write about what I enjoy (or not enjoy), and I want to share that with the world. I spend a lot of my time listening to music, but it'll usually be the same thing on rotation until I feel comfortable to move on to something new. So I think that's where I'll start - writing about the music that I like and why I like it. I don't know how long it'll take me - I haven't decided if it'll be polished and proofread, or a jumbled mess (like this one). I haven't decided if it'll be one big post, or a conglomerate. And you know what? that's okay. I don't need to plan everything out. I just need to put something on the page (...or, text post in this case). So that's where we'll start - vivi vibing to vibrations (thx sofia for the name)

that's all I have for now. I'm not the most well-versed in this website, but I feel like I know enough to get me going. the rest will come. and on that note of rest, I need some.

'-V

may 5. 2023