#time to lay this one to rest now too
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into-the-feniverse · 1 year ago
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Updated timeline!!!
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Fixed some things, made it easier to figure out the sub events, aaaand for anyone who wants a more detailed breakdown you can check out this spreadsheet
For more bnha creative resources (like maps, drawing templates, etc): bit.ly/bnhatemplates
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batsinurbelfrey · 2 months ago
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#hot take that doesnt feel that 'hot' if ur kid is going thru one of the most traumatic experiences of their lives#and having to do it TOTALLY alone despite it not at all being a one person job#but thats just circumstance and how the cookie crumbled#and then you offer to come pick them up and drive them home for a week of help and relaxation once the experience is over since that's#all you can offer at the time#its. kinda a fucked up move to then back out when the time comes for said promised r&r#esp when u dont seem to understand [or maybe worse yet you Do but don't care] that ur child CLUNG to and FANTASIZED abt the relief that was#on the horizon for WEEKS of HELL. like 'just a little longer and then I will finally have some help.'#'just a little longer and then I can rest'#'just a few more days and then I can lay low and recoup some expenses and have meals I don't have to solely cook whilst also rehabbing a#sick dog and trying to maintain a home whilst also working full time'#only to get to 'the day' and get a 'its not going to work out after all sorry....we are just so Busy prepping for our travel abroad next#month you know? it would be too Stressful to have a third person in the house'#YOU WANT TO TALK TO ME ABT STRESS RIGHT NOW????? BE SO FOR REAL----#like if u werent free fine. u dont owe me shit im grown. BUT2 PROMISE IT AND REAFFIRM IT TIME AFTER TIME AND THEN BACK OUT IN THE 11TH HOUR#SERIOUSLY???#I love them but this. fucking Hurts. and I had to pretend it Didnt so as to not make a scene
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fear-no-mort · 2 months ago
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slams fists down on beautifully crafted oak desk
#uh started the rewatch Now .Earlier ;; THEY HURT ME SO FUCKING HBABBDNDFGPOGGr#I CRIED LIKE FOUR TIMES WHILE WATCGUB THE FUCKING PILOT#it just lays it all out so perfectly#the entire time morty was like protesting to rick and complaining but when jerry was kicking him out he defended him#I cant. theyre smiling because of eachother#god i looovoreergkt how much of the stuff rick says to morty is to impress him teach him or just scare him#like the way rick blows stuff out of proportion just cause he wants to see how morty will react hes . so obsessed with him#for tHE FIRST TIME IN HIS LIFE… MORTY HAS A FRIEND:&!:#and they’re so. they like speak fondly towards eachother rick is way more soft and earnest when talking to morty n morty is outwardly#impressed and fascinated with the things rick does from time to time and he trusts him#and all the emphasis on how rick sincerely only gave a shit about morty. whenever he talks to the rest of the family it’s either exaggerated#or blunt and if mortys there then hes all rick focuses on#and how it’s repeated rick Needs morty to help him . no one else not even someone more helpful and agreeable nope just morty#if it’s not morty rick doesn’t want it at all#and like even as early as the cold open for the pilot. you can see rick become impressed when morty suddenly becomes assertive once he-#actually hears the bomb and starts getting up and trying to kick rick off the drivers seat#big tough guy all of a suddenLIKE YOU CSN TELL HE DIDNT EXPRCT THAT AT ALL AND HES SURPRISED#ive been thinking a lot lately about how . one of ricks favourite qualities about morty imo is his sense of morality and refusal to just-#take stuff when it reaches a certain point. like he Loves that side of morty so much and doesn’t mind too much when it comes out because of-#something he did. yeah that part in the pilot cold open is like the first thing of that go back and look at how taken aback rick is#and i love how sheepish rick is around morty every now and then. like he so clearly tries to look cool to him and to know what he’s talking#about he needs to twist everything to be correct . all the time but also in front of morty specifically#crazyyyy crazy how he managed to find the one real morty#ohg. uitltogfo ouhkdfjrjp iuubbvv ? ledjndflfidnf#odiespeak
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raksh-writes · 3 months ago
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Oh to write a line that is such an emotional punch to the gut you have to take a break and maybe even go on a walk, like oof
#Raksh's writing ramblings#it took a lot of tweaks and a lot of time just sitting there staring at the paragraph but damn does it hit now#Im actually kinda shocked how well it works#and since its so hot and humid and absolutely godamn awful today that my brain feels like mush#this might be a good point to leave it on today and pick back up on tomorrow#kinda sucks Im only able to get around 600 words a day#But after almost a year of writer's block I'll take it with open arms#(my thesis can wait a lil'm more 🙈🙈)#btw Im writing the final part to the VegasPete time travel AU#and its mostly Vegas' and Gun's confrontation so that's already heavy stuff#but these lines Gun just said to Vegas? oh my god#I might've peaked right there and then#hopefully that'll stay relevant and won’t sound like shit when I get back to it tomorrow 🙈😂#but so far Im having so much fun and it's beginning to look like it might become one of the best things I've ever written#it just Flows and Im letting myself go with the style and its just-- so nice 😩#lots of parallels and lots of implications and mirroring in this confrontation between father and son#might become my favourite bit too#and Id prob appeal to no one but me 🙈 but ehh Im happy with how its turning out and that's important ^^#and if anyone else likes it then thats just an added bonus ^^#now Im gonna go lay down and rest for a bit bcs this heat wave really is killing me#over 32 degrees Celcius with Zero wind snd humid as fuck#I was Not made for this :')
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the-tiniest-demigod · 6 months ago
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I hate physical therapy until i remember I haven't been able to run, skip, or jump in 4 years
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moe-broey · 3 months ago
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Why did I start like three other projects when I was already working on a big project when I just got hit with the autism exhaustion beam (requires. At least One Full Day just dead in bed, and then some more Taking It Easy time after)
#i don't even know what prompted it...#hit w a vision. not enough time to execute it. hit w a vision. too tired to execute it.#i guess technically it was just two huh. but all the moving parts made the other one feel like two in and of itself#oh. now i remember there was another shitpost behind it. i just. didn't get to.#thinking about bruno... thinking about anna... thinking about the fairies... thinking about mirabilis specifically actually#she gets the short end of the stick characterization wise and it's such a shame.#to the point where i was unsure what to do w her... i think i got some ideas rattling around though#I CAN... GIVE HER.... SO MUCH MORE.... without changing too much about her. i just need to extrapolate.#hits her w the disability beam. idk if it's also autism but she has some sort of chronic condition#that just makes you. so tireds. moe and mira shaking hands. let's lay down and rest together.#also thinking about the subtle differences between a full dream and a daydream... between sleeping and just resting#and. making her kitty coded. she is such a kitten pile type girl. she is such a lap cat. queen of catnapping#which i'm thinking works really well w peony and even sharena. not so much moe though 😭💔#i want to capture a playful side. and maybe even a 'i'm still figuring out how i feel about that' side to her#like... i'm imagining peony as someone who's surprisingly insightful and emotionally intelligent.#she's got it all figured out. she already knows. she's not always right. but she tends to know what's up#i'm thinking... maybe mira isn't quite there yet. or struggles to see outside of herself. for obvious/understandable reasons#but she has that unwavering desire for joy and comfort the way peony does. she may feel a pang of jealousy here and there#but it doesn't get in the way of her goals and wants for others. which may be the defining factor actually#like obviously this could get messy if you simplify it too much into 'good' or 'bad'. bc all these girls are DIRECT reflections#of each one's trauma response. assigning morality to that is fucked up. but for story purposes... maybe freyja/freyr did. to a degree.#bc maybe they're flawed and fucked up too. it's about The Cycles. i'm getting so lost in the sauce though LMFAOO#i am GOING to do SOMETHING. for mirabilis. mark my fucking words.
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pinkseas · 2 years ago
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on my hands and knees begging u to say your words about xiaolumi… i want to hear them… i’ll pay you back in art i prommy—
WHY WOULD YOU ENABLE ME LIKE THIS no need for art i literally owe you my fucking Life just for that one piece like oh my god. ohhhh my god. the amount of times i have linked that to my friends and waxed poetic and maybe cried a little. ANYWAYS. i am about to be So Silly And So Disorganized
so here's the thing right?? it depends SO heavily on how you interpret lumine. the traveler definitely has their own personality and agenda ingame but there's still SO much wiggle room in terms of what you do with that. if i really wanted to i could probably make it a Lot More Accurate by focusing on the traveler in canon and going from there however i will in fact be completely ignoring that and focusing on my interpretation of lumi specifically light and love <3 <- thats my little disclaimer ANYWAYS
they are So Similar in a lot of ways. young adults who are also centuries old. stubborn bastards who would give their lives protecting those around them even if they got absolutely nothing in return. so quick to throw themselves into the line of fire for the sake of friends and strangers alike. such a strong instinct to protect. not mortal, not by a long shot, but not quite gods either, something uniquely inhuman and in between. a centuries worth of weight on their shoulders. reaching their breaking points and pushing further still, refusing to let themselves crumble. and, even with very close companions, i think they're very lonely. there's no one quite like xiao in teyvat, no one quite like lumine without aether there by her side- maybe no one quite like lumine at all, anymore.
i think its about sharing. i think they'd find it easy to talk with and be around one another, even though they're typically so slow and so careful with trust. i think fighting together comes as easily as breathing, that their urge to protect lines up perfectly with the others and leads to them doing so much for those around them as well as each other. they will not let the other fall. they share the weight on their shoulders, share the centuries of bloodshed and horrors seen and caused alike, share in the unique brand of loneliness that comes with knowing that where someone was once by your side there's no one like you left.
vulnerability does not come easily to any of them. they can always push themselves further, always be a little stronger, always run a little faster. but its exactly that, i think, the recognition of someone so like themselves that makes it easier for them to trust in one another. lumine can call xiao's name when she needs him, xiao can find lumine if he needs her. i think that for all they would shoulder the world on their own and know the other would do the same in a heartbeat, they trust one another to come to them when they need help. it would be so, so easy to ignore it, to press forward, to remain alone. but they made a promise, and they intend to keep it.
i like to imagine that lumine's presence has a purifying effect on xiao. something she could control and channel should she realize, but for now something small, just enough to ease that weight. just enough to make sure he won't succumb.
i think a big part of it is about learning how to live again. they both carry that weight, that stubborn mindset, but wanting to see the other happy helps. knowing the other understands helps. when it hurts they can breathe together, and the type of pain they feel may never truly go away but they dont have to experience it alone.
every snowflake, every sunrise, every flower is just a little bit different from the rest. xiao's favorite quiet places are nicer with her there. they live so very differently but lumine's teapot is always there and xiao is no longer bound by his contract, learning ever so slowly how to let himself go. they have spent so, so long surviving. now, though, they remember to taste the fresh air, learn to indulge in the smallest things. lumine experiments with recipes until her almond tofu is catered to xiao's tastes exactly, the perfect texture. at night in liyue xiao tells her stories of the constellations and she remembers every word, at night in the teapot lumine will lift a hand and the sky will match her memories, her turn to tell stories about stars he's never seen.
they are both so, so tired. and i think that they would trust the other enough to let themselves rest. you can put your strength down. im sitting here with you at the kitchen table. you dont need to say anything. <- that quote is so them for real its shared silences mutual understanding and comfort always having each other's backs its twin moons twin stars two beings caught in each other's orbit and choosing every day to stay. sitting side by side on the mountaintop, hands entwined, lumine's head on his shoulder. breathing. loving. living.
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ursamajori · 2 years ago
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ok i’m late with this but the funniest thing about spotify wrapped is when your top song of the year is by an artist you don’t listen to
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autisticlee · 9 days ago
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I stopped marking anxiety on medical forms where it asks what i've been diagnosed with in the past because I experienced every doctor telling me all my problems were anxiety and getting no help. except trying to convince me to take anti anxiety meds (tried once and made me have constant panic attacks and I only slept i think 5 hours in a week and was having hallucinations and stuff. never again!!!) but when i'm having heart rate increase with palpitations and shaking and dizziness and sweating and weakness and completely exhasution and feeling out of breath, nausea, and etc, it happens without the anxiety brain symptoms. I just stand up and it happens, even if head empty. but doesn't happen if i'm layijg down and worrying about a thing?? not sure if I should try talking to a doctor about it again and hope not marking the anxiety box helps, or just assume i'll be told it's anxiety again and not waste my energy..........
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inmirova · 1 month ago
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"it's easier to leave an abusive situation than it is to stop an abuser" :^( but it's not easy :^(
#repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns repeating patterns#im not unsafe btw just. :^) scared :^)#tired.#starting to stop walking on eggshells kind of. in a cowardly way. like responding some of my real thoughts but at 4am#i want to scream. im not like that but i want to yell and tell her to leave me alone forever and i just want to be able to rest !#and to not be afraid. i want to move. i want to drop off the face of the earth. i want to go to bed. i want to stay awake and on guard.#idk. im tired. im so tired and i want it to stop. it's not even a big deal.#the thinly veiled insults bother me more than anything else. insult sandwich on compliment bread.#im so pretty im so stupid im so funny. im smart im too insecure im beautiful. im the most interesting person she knows im evil im talented#it's not even the worst thing it just pisses me off so much. do you think this is helpful to say? do you think this is normal?#do you think you'll get what you want insulting and belittling me as long as you tell me you think im attractive?#it's always how pretty i am. like some superficial bullshit is going to make up for an insult or make the insult disappear#and everyone else gets to leave but if i leave she'll die and it'll be all my fault and this is just like x y or z#and didnt i know she almost experienced trauma as a child but didnt? and how that effects her?#fuck. i hope she sees this tbh. how fucking insulting to see something someone's experienced and say that couldve maybe happened to me#but the person who couldve done it lives in another country and never came here.#what the fuck. what the fuck.#so it didnt happen to you? you cant lay claim to it at all? yet you think you understand me or that even if it did happen it's all the same#im going to lose my mind. im so. fucking. over it. but im a coward and i dont want her to die so ill grin and bear it.#and she'll tear out all my skin and ask if it's a little too much and ill say it's fine and she'll say im so gorgeous but i'm disgusting#but at least im kind. and ill say okay. because if i say anything else it's a threat on her fucking life.#tbh im only posting this now bc i know no one will likely read it. perpetual coward when it comes to this shit#because if i tell someone the full extent they'll ask why i didn't leave sooner. but i did!#i left and i got bombarded and overwhelmed and i was so tired of being scared of running into her everywhere#and i just. eased back in. and said it would be less this time. and it is so much more. it is so much worse.#ive lived in that fear before and i was so tired of it. it was a big reason i moved so far for college. and i cant just run away#so this seemed better. but it's so much worse. id rather hide every day of my life. keep an eye out everywhere and run away.#it wasnt so bad really. it was tedious and nauseating and i only ever explained it to one person. but it wasnt impossible.#this is much closer to impossible. this is soul crushing every day. and the things she does arent even as bad i dont think#it just doesnt stop. at least in high school i eventually got it to stop. i just had to be avoidant. this. wont stop.
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medicinemane · 5 months ago
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Man, I'm just kind of dazed today
I woke up yesterday around 9am, didn't do much for the day, went to bed... realized it was too hot to fall asleep (cause my window is broken so I can't open it)
So I got up, filled 3 box with papers as I sorted out the magazines and mail
Then I needed to stay up till after 8am so I could go to the post office to return that bowl. Came back and laid down but... you know when your body just feels wired and you really need to sleep but can't? Probably cause it's pumping out hormones to keep me awake to compensate for me being so tired, that's my guess based on how it feels
Anyway, lay down and kind of drift off with a video in the background, but... I think I was just on the verge of sleep but not able to cross over... like dozing at best
Then I hear Bart making noise and look over and he's acting like he's hunting a mouse, and sure enough he was, so he helps me cup it, and then I go take it to a field outside of town to hopefully live a better life... but clearly wasn't sleeping if I'm doing that
And... I'm still up. I think I'm gonna try and take another crack at sleeping... I hope I can do it. Things do at least feel a bit cooler
But yeah, I'm a mess today, gonna be two days worth of dash to look through whenever I get up, and then I can also respond to the couple messages I've got
But oof... hate feeling like this. The non depressed part of me wants to die just because maybe then I could finally rest
#for the record not even feeling that suicidal today; not sure if I'm too tired for it or if I'm just in an ok mood for once#but fuck do I just want to shut off and never have to boot up again; but now and in general#I relate to Bilbo and Frodo talking about being stretched thin... I feel something similar... you know... most of the time#strip the depression aside and I'm tired... and I don't know if any amount of rest will cure it... I don't know if I can truly rest#got a lot of things I want to do; whole lot of skills I want to pick up#but... having to be the parent my whole life; never actually getting a proper break... I'm so tired#my trip to Phoenix was the closest to a break I've gotten; but... there was a set activity in a set time frame#...it still kinda feels like I should have found a way to squeeze more out of it; you know? like as an obligation#not cause I minded how things actually went... but it just felt like I shouldn't have been at the hotel on the couch; should have been out#and then a 3 day window with stressful travel on either side of it... hard to really relax like that#obviously I had a fairly bad breakdown there; one of the few times I was actually at serious risk... not sure if I'd have managed it#don't trust myself to have the nerve to kill myself; but I very much did have a method... if I hadn't had someone to go see the next day#might have just gone ahead with it#but anyway; other than dinner with my friend their friend group and showers... I'm not sure I relaxed there either#I think... I think sleeping was more a maintenance obligation and I sprung up like when I set an alarm#(I so rarely set alarms and almost always wake up a couple minutes before them; it felt like that for 3 days straight)#so... truthfully I don't know if... if I've ever really rested#mhh... no joke; the last time that comes to mind that I didn't feel like I had to be kind of on#was when I was 13 on a school trip; and I'd taken a surf board to the back of the head while being rescued from a rip tide#and so people were worried about me; and I was just kind of laying there relaxing while people played cards and stuff nearby#...mhh... anyway... in less of a mood to say it's a shame I didn't just drown; so I suppose that's something#but... I don't even know what I'm saying; I'm so tired in the lack of sleep sense#and also physically and emotionally or... whatever#well... take care#mm tag so i can find things later
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autumnoakes · 5 months ago
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oughhhhhh
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cheswirls · 7 months ago
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oh the hotel arc is starting it is here
#i had a thought bc of the chapter title#the the opening made me remember that these arcs have wrapped up rather nicely#so we can't end fol on this note#but surprise surprise it is the most open-ended of the bunch#didn't expect to start hotel arc halfway thru the chapter but hey hey hey :)#it makes sense given how fol arc jus ended#this makes me wanna... touch up what happened end of hospice arc#r those 2 jus gonna sit tight or are they headed somewhere#I forgot abt the girls too tho i think now that their mission is done they were gonna lay low#bard on the other hand idk given more... happened tho I'm not sure if those 2 are aware#don't think they were around for the reaper stuff#anyway finny n kids incoming!!! at the very least to the opium den to meet the rest of the gang#their half of the chapter was so funny bc i forgot they were being shot at#then the adults were all like 'yea it was made to be inescapable' n i had to laugh bc..... finny is with them so actually no#super touching that...what's his name i forgor. the one finny saved#that he came around at the end when they surfaced and threw his arms around finny. sweet of him#he didn't even have dialogue this chapter but the emotion was Felt#this actually flew by bc of how little dialogue there was but at least it wasn't 10 pages#ig that was also the anime premiere so yana must've been heckin busy#i forget sometimes how busy not just a mangaka but an artist yana is when I start counting pages#so many responsibilities... how does one person do it all#next time I will get a read tag i prommy. until then hope this is vague enough for ani-onlies#< OOPSIE I do have a tag!!! added#c reads bb
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chuluoyi · 3 months ago
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✎ all of me
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- gojo satoru x reader
you understand that some things in marriage just needs compromise. and he soon understands too, when you're at your most vulnerable and he fails to be by your side when you need him the most
genre: angst, hurt/comfort, established relationship (you're married & have a son!) argument, feral gojo, mentions of injury & blood, fluff
note: if it isn't obvious by now i'm in the mood of angst-hurt/comfort this week HEHE :)) this is longer than the usual love entry, so i hope you'll enjoy it!
a part of gojo's love entries
general masterlist
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Bantering with your husband is not uncommon―in fact, it happens on daily basis.
"Satoru― I'm talking to you!"
But having serious arguments with him is another matter entirely.
Your fists tightening at your sides, facing his unamused expression. How insufferable is he? You told him that everyday, but right now, he's truly surpassed previous levels of infuriating behavior.
"And I can hear you, sweetheart," he retorted, casting a glance your way. The term of endearment he used for you sounding almost like a sneer to your ears and you felt offended.
"I don't think you're taking this seriously," you griped, trying to calm your emotions, still balling your hands. "Someone is following our son on his way back from school―how can you be this... flippant?!"
Numerous photograph of your son exiting the school building from different angles had arrived in your mailbox, and if it wasn't a creepy warning from those who placed a target on his back, then you didn't know what it was.
Satoru let out an exasperated grunt. "I'm telling you, I'll pick him up for the rest of the week. No one will lay a hand on him."
You gritted your teeth. "And I'm telling you, they're trying to make you do just that. Even morons know not to mess with you― they're leaving hints, and you're taking the bait!"
Contrary to what you believed, Satoru felt just as worried as you upon knowing that someone might have marked his precious son, who was now six years old and had recently started attending preschool.
But this is where your approaches differ. You are always the cautious one, overanalyzing each detail, while he leans towards being impulsive, often resorting to brute force.
"Who do you think can stand a chance against me?" Satoru challenged with a real sneer this time. "Remember my words, wife, no one is going to hurt me, you or our baby. I'll end them where they stand."
"That's not the point!" you threw your hands in the air, irate. "Satoru, they're going to take advantage of―"
"Look, I don't want to argue with you." Satoru's gaze was hard on you, his tone clipped, and it made you stiffen. "His safety comes first— and you, of all people, should know I'd never let anything happen to him. You need to quit nitpicking and have a little faith in me."
"I know you are more than capable, but you are not―!"
And then he said it, and his words piercing through you like a knife―
"Don't compare me to you," your husband remarked a little too coldly. "I can do things you can't. Just rest your pretty head, I'll take care of the rest."
Nevermind that he blatantly dismissed your skills as a jujutsu sorcerer, nevermind that he totally didn't listen to you at all―he just went and made himself look like some sort unparalleled god, forgetting how much his hubris could actually take him.
And all these thoughts only made you angrier.
"So be it then." You tried desperately to hold yourself from shaking because you'd be damned if you showed it to him. "A word of advice, Satoru: beware of your arrogance."
With those words, you spun around, marching off toward your son's room, because no way in hell was you going to sleep with that obnoxious prick tonight.
But when you caught the sight of your baby scuttling away from the gap in the door, a fragment of your heart crumbled. Oh. He has seen it all.
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In Gojo Satoru's mind, he is made of two things: a powerful jujutsu sorcerer and a family man.
With his immense strength, comes a certain responsibility. And with that responsibility, certain habits have formed. If you just took a few seconds to breathe and looked back throughout the past decade he'd spent with you, you'd know that in fact―
It was also his way to shield you. Satoru stands by the principle that you and his little boy must be protected at all cost, and he most certainly would pull all stops to do just that.
But frankly, he couldn't deny that he felt insulted by how defiant you were. Did you really think he would let anyone ever touch your―his―son? He wouldn't, they'd meet his wrath first and you should've known that.
Still, something akin to guilt nudged at his conscience as he lay alone in your shared bed that night. It felt strange not having you cuddling him. He felt empty.
. . .
None of your shampoo-scented pillow, none of your nightdresses, all of it replaced by a single photo hanging in the wall and the urn of ashes—
Abruptly, he jerked his eyes open, shaken from the most dreadful nightmare he had experienced—
Of you no longer by his side.
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“Mama.” Your little boy looked up to you with his doe-blue eyes in the next day, his hand gripping yours. “I’ll be fine.”
You were accompanying him to the preschool. While Satoru had requested Ichiji to drive him, you insisted on tagging along to keep a watchful eye as well. You'd leave your husband to pick him up later just as he wanted.
“Huh?” you turned to him, tilting your head.
“I'll stick by Uncle Ichiji's side the entire time,” he replied in a murmur. “And papa will be picking me up too later. If there are bad guys, they'll get him first.”
You bit your lip, feeling a wave of guilt wash over you. Your boy witnessed your outburst last night and hadn't inquired about it until now, and even then, he was trying to reassure you.
“So… don’t fight.” His round, cerulean eyes then darted towards you, blinking hesitantly, causing you to catch your breath.
He looks so much like Satoru. At six years old, he was the spitting image of him, except his personality—he took after you in that area. It was as if your son was a softer, more innocent version of him. And your heart twisted, remembering your argument last night.
Don't compare me to you.
With a sigh, you bent down to be eye-level with him and managed a smile, holding both of his little hands. “I’m sorry… it was just misunderstanding last night, okay? Don’t worry.”
“…really?”
“Really. Mama and papa were just tired,” you tried to reason, a thin smile on your face. "It's going to be okay, just like you said, yeah? Papa will beat the bad guys out there."
“Will he pull through...? If they bring a knife, and he's just there laughing, they can cut him.”
A giggle escaped your lips at your baby's innocent wonderings, easing the ache in your heart as you recalled how Satoru humored him in so many ways.
You gently poked your son in the cheek. "Nah, do you remember what he always goes on about?"
He puffed up his cheeks in response, his expression turning sour as if combing through memories of hundreds of shenanigans Satoru had instigated to recall his words. You let out a hearty chuckle, finding him so adorable.
"He's strong, he's going to win. He always does."
"Oh. Mmm." Your son scrunched up his nose cutely, before looking away and squeezing your hand. A sincerer smile bloomed in your lips, heart melting at the sight of your growing munchkin.
You will protect him. And maybe you could patch things up with Satoru later that night. Maybe yesterday you were just too paranoid.
That was the plan... at least until your son suddenly screamed—someone wrenching him from your grasp. Without a second thought, you reacted, flipping the attacker away from you and him.
. . . and that was the beginning of how everything started to unravel so terribly that day.
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"Gojo-san...! There's been an incident!"
He got that call right after he finished some things with Yaga. Satoru teleported to the preschool right away, only to be greeted by a scene of utter chaos.
Several teachers stood outside the building, and police officers were present at the scene. It was all a blur of cursed energy until his eyes caught sight of—
His little boy, red-faced and obviously in fear, was clinging to Ichiji, who was frantically making calls. Some teachers gathered around him were seemingly trying to coax him to speak.
He didn't waste a second to dash towards him, tearing through the crowd.
"Are you okay? Hey, buddy, what happened?" Satoru pulled him away from Ichiji and turned him over, crouching to his level to check for any signs of injury or harm.
And upon seeing him actually here, his son's eyes immediately welled up with tears, and Satoru felt a chill run through his veins as he broke into sobs, which quickly turned into heart-wrenching wails.
"Mama—! F-find mama—!" the little boy choked out through his tears, clutching onto his shirt tightly and crumbling in his embrace, thoroughly inconsolable.
Satoru's sharp gaze quickly swept over the scene, seeking any clues, while he tightened his hold over him. It was then he noticed traces of your cursed energy mingled with blood.
They hurt you.
"Hey, kiddo—listen to me, it's going to be alright, yeah?" Satoru said, gently pulling away to wipe away his tears, holding the boy's face tenderly in his hands. "Go with Ichiji for now, okay? I'm going to bring mama back, I promise."
He didn't need to be told twice. Your son is always obedient when it matters the most. He gave him a small nod, still shaking with tears.
"Don't worry," he flashed a reassuring smile and ruffled his hair. "I'm the strongest, remember? I'll get her back," he vowed once again. "She'll be fine. Wait for me until then, yeah?"
Ichiji was ready to leave as he had called for those in headquarters as backup in case anything were to happen again. Trusting him to keep his son safe, Satoru took off as soon as he could no longer see the sight of his son's tear-streaked face trying to watch him as the car pulled away.
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"I won't repeat myself— where is my wife?"
Satoru wasn't playing this time. He skipped past taunts and just plain threats. These little fries, he thought.
The man he held by the throat was in a lot of distress. "Hyaaa! It's him! Please, please, let me go! I'm acting under orders!"
He then flung him across the wall— might have added more cursed energy than necessary.
At the moment, his entire focus was on trying to locate you. He couldn't let his mind wander to anything else; in fact, he didn't permit himself to.
It didn't take him long to piece together the general location of where you were through the residual of your cursed energy. They stationed several hooligans in this abandoned warehouse to stall him, but he got rid of them quickly and he could sense that you were close by.
"It's Gojo Satoru!"
"Run! Ruuuun!"
What a pain. They picked the wrong person to mess with, and Satoru's lips curled into a manic grin as he opened his palm, pulling them in—
"Cursed Technique Lapse: Blue."
Chaos erupted as the building collapsed around him. He hoped you would realize he was here and manage to avoid getting caught in the wreckage. He was sure you'd know though.
And true to his thoughts, soon he found you— blasting your attacker away with a powerful kick.
Satoru thought that you were a sight to behold, really. And he was about to call out to you when he felt it.
It happened almost in an instant. The way his heart dropped to his stomach, and how his body reacted, barely whispering the incantation for Red as he shot it at something lurking behind you—
At that moment, the only thing you were aware of was the foul stench of a curse. Time seemed to stop before the overwhelming force of Red expelled it away from you.
But before then, you experienced a searing, white-hot pain that scorched through your flesh and pierced your abdomen—
"Y/N―fuck―!" The voice that came from Satoru's throat was raw and laden with panic.
He pulled you against him protectively as you collapsed, blinded by pain. He immediately felt warmth spreading across his lower body—your blood was rapidly drenching his shirt, and he felt a shiver down his spine.
You held onto him tightly while suppressing your scream, feeling every bit of your strength drain away along with the dark crimson blood that poured out of you.
"―toru―" you managed to croak amidst the scalding pain, curling and whimpering in his hold.
"Hey― sweetheart, please―" his voice rang in your ears, as he pressed down on your wound. His hands were shaking, and you clawed at him and groaned in agony. "I-I'm taking you back now― You're going to be alright, yeah?"
The wound was beyond anything you had experienced before, causing you to cry out and gasp for air. It was almost as if something fried your insides. It was hard to stay conscious.
"I've got you now. You're going to be okay." His voice was coarse, as he hurriedly carried you out. And he tried not to let the full-blown panic take over him when your body went limp in his arms, your breaths slowing, head lolling in his chest.
"You're going to be alright! You hear me, sweetheart? You're going to make it. Our baby― he's waiting for you. I promise you, you're going to be fine―"
Perhaps he was trying to tell that to himself, because despite the excruciating pain, a wave of reassurance washed over you.
You were in the arms of the strongest sorcerer alive, what more could you possibly afraid of?
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A special grade curse. They had actually unleashed a potent curse and likely aimed at him as their final card—until it veered off course and struck you, leaving a searing gash across your abdomen.
Satoru felt numb as he sat in the waiting room in his bloodied uniform. You got hurt so terribly right in front of his eyes, and all he could feel was this profound void that seemed to bore through him and pierced his soul.
He was supposed to protect you. He said it to your face that nothing and no one would touch your son, and it was in his wedding vows that he'd protect you with his life too.
And yet what happened?
If only he was faster. If only he was able to pull you to him and protect you with his infinity—none of this shit would have happened.
Seeing your face twisted in agony and smeared with blood made him feel sick to his stomach. Inside that OR, you hovered on the brink of life and death, and he was here, unable to do anything.
Satoru rested his head against the wall, feeling a sharp pain surge through his chest. He remembered waking up to your face every morning, the way your touches felt, and how you had brightened his world for the past decade. If he lost you now... he wouldn't survive it. He would wreck anything, everything—
"Papa!" and came his voice of reason. Satoru immediately discarded his bloodstained jacket by instinct, throwing it away before his boy could see it, with Ichiji and Megumi closely trailing behind.
His son crashed himself into him and threw his little arms around his torso, crying—and in that very second, the thump of his heart sounded louder in his ears. Somehow it felt like a knife that twisted his insides.
"Hey, kiddo." Satoru repositioned him so that he would sit on his lap and hugged him, patting him in the back. "There, there... it's alright, yeah? Mama is inside, she'll get better soon."
Your little boy pulled away and wiped his eyes, and Satoru chuckled as he helped him blow his nose. His child was incredibly adorable, and his actions mirrored yours to such an extent that it made Satoru's heart soften.
"Mama g-got hurt trying to... tell me to g-go..." the boy suddenly said amidst his quieter sniffles. "And... she s-said... papa— i-is strong and g-going to win..."
You believe in him. Ignoring the ache in his chest, only able to reply him with a "Yeah..."
Not long after, Shoko emerged from the operating room and informed him that the surgery had been successful, though you would likely need to have a one-week stay in the hospital for observation. He intended to move you to the VIP suite and stay the night there, but then he remembered his son, who was holding his hand.
Satoru crouched down and patted him in the head, fixing him a smile. "See? Mama is okay, but she needs to sleep here to get even better. Now you go home first with big brother Megumi, yeah?"
Your son adored Megumi and often begged you to let him stay over at his place, but this time he looked hesitant, fiddling with his little fingers. "Really? Mama will be home... soon?"
"Mm-hmm, the more she sleeps here, the faster she'll go back home, alright?"
And with that, his baby nodded and Satoru turned to Megumi with a nod. "Thank you for this, Megumi."
The boy whose life he had once saved on some sort of a whim, now grown up and shared the same concern he had for you, Fushiguro Megumi had never before witnessed his benefactor expressing such sincere gratitude for anything before.
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When you came to, your body felt as heavy as lead.
The discomfort in your abdomen made you flinch, and you almost let out a groan until you turned to your side and saw him.
Satoru was asleep while sitting in the sofa next to your bed, dark circles evident under his eyes. It might have been your imagination, but his cheeks appeared to be slightly red too.
You tried to recall what had happened to you when it came back—you urging your son to run away as you let yourself being taken away, almost escaping from that warehouse, the flash of excruciating pain, and Satoru's stricken voice.
So he must've been here since last night. Any remnants of your disagreement seemed to have vanished, seeing him there with you, barely covering himself with the blanket, with a frown still marking his forehead even in his sleep.
You wanted to reach out to him until the movement sent a sharp jab to your stomach and you cried out a bit.
In that split second, Satoru's eyes jerked open, and realizing you were awake, his gaze locked onto yours. "Y/N—" But your strained whimper and expression told him everything. "Does it hurt? I-I'll get Shoko, wait—"
And then he hit the call button. Throughout it all, he kept a firm grip on your hand for reassurance. A few minutes later, Shoko arrived and examined your wound, subsequently administering painkillers to alleviate your discomfort.
"It's going to leave a scar," she explained grimly, showing the mangled skin where the curse had made its mark on you, and seeing that, Satoru clenched his fists.
Shoko sighed, empathizing with her friend's frustration. "It's going to fade with time, don't worry. You did well, Gojo. You brought her here quickly. Had you been even slightly later, there could have been an irreversible damage to her organs."
But your husband remained quiet, unable to bring himself to look at you. And after she left, you tried to finally voice your question to him.
"O-our—"
"He's fine," Satoru immediately answered, squeezing your hand. "Our boy is fine. I'll tell Megumi to visit later—he's with him."
A sigh of relief came out of you. "Thank... goodness."
But his expression seemed to fall even further after hearing your response. Satoru settled himself on the seat next to you and lowered the rail on your bed, allowing you to be even closer to each other.
"Do you not feel any pain anymore?" he asked then, gently tucking a strand of your hair behind your ear. He looked so sad, a stark contrast of how he usually was, and it bugged you.
"No... I feel fine now."
"Then, can I hug you?"
Of course you nodded without a second thought, and carefully, he wrapped his arms around your body, pulling you close and resting his face on the crook of your neck.
You knew what it was. Satoru was still visibly shaken by what had happened to you, and he wasn't great at expressing himself, so he tried to find consolation through this physical closeness instead.
"I'm okay..." you patted his back, trying to convince him. "I'm alright now, yeah?" But to your surprise, suddenly his whole body started to shake. "Satoru...?"
“…’m sorry.” His voice was barely above a whisper as he nuzzled you. “I shouldn't... have let you get this hurt...”
It always amazes you how Satoru always gets this distressed whenever you sustain any injury. You had seen him cry precisely two times now—once after you gave birth to your son and experienced severe bleeding, and now.
"It's not your fault..." you whispered in response. "You... have protected me well."
He held you tighter, his tone faltering. "I didn't."
"You have..." you stroked his hair, trying to convince him. "I'm still here, aren't I?"
Hearing you say that made Satoru's chest ache. The thought of something like this happening to you was unimaginable, and now that it had, he couldn't come to terms with seeing you hurt right in front of him.
"Don't—" he choked on his voice, his breath trembled against your neck. "Don't ever put yourself in danger again. If something happened to you, I wouldn't be able to live with myself..."
You couldn't make that promise. Despite the pleading in his voice, you knew deep down that your son's life—and his—meant more, and given the chance, you would obviously save theirs for yours.
“Satoru... I love you, you know that, right?”
So you simply embraced him close, hoping that in this life, you would live long enough that he would never have to see you like this again.
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Epilogue
"Papa, how do I become stronger?"
Satoru blinked when his son asked him that so innocently and curiously, taken aback as he led him to your private room later that afternoon. "Oh? What brought this on?"
His first and only son, a perfect miniature of himself, pursed his lips. "I don't want Mama to get hurt again..."
Satoru's heart warmed at his baby’s sincere words, and despite himself, he chuckled.
"What's funny?" his son leveled a glare at him. "I'm being serious."
"Well, aren't you such a good boy? Don't worry, kiddo, I'll teach you my ways~"
"What ways?"
"Well, no need to rush, pumpkin. First of all, you will have to harness your skills and then you have to be more like me—"
"Do I have to be like you…? Is there no other way?"
"—? What's wrong with being more like me?"
"Everything...?"
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sttoru · 9 days ago
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⠀⠀ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒. a relaxing day at the beach w/ toji ‘n little megumi, accompanied by their usual bickering and precious moments
tags. dad!toji x wife!female reader. fluff. honestly just the beach episode toji deserves w his family t_t not proof read!
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the beach is a beautiful place to rest after a tough week. toji lays on the towel besides yours, bulky arms resting behind his head as he enjoyed the gentle breeze, the smell of the sea mixed with his wife’s perfume.
the peace is quickly disturbed when he feels a small fist claw at his mouth.
“‘gumi, don’t feed papa sand,” your muffled laughter echoes through the busy beach. you watch your husband attempt to fight off megumi’s tiny hands as they pry his lips apart.
toji grunts and moves his head multiple times, but the toddler is determined to get what he wants. “brat—” the dark-haired man scoffs while his hands wrap around megumi’s torso, lifting the little boy in the air as his final resort, “what’s this all ‘bout? wanna kill y’r daddy or sum?”
your son pouts and furrows his brows. “no, i made papa food. burger,” he defends himself and kicks his legs while being held up at arms length. megumi’s tiny fist full of sand manages to reach his father’s lips again, “now papa eat!”
toji lifts megumi up higher, as far away from his face as possible. he takes a second before realising that he indeed had made a request for a burger just moments ago, when his son asked him what he should make out of the sand.
toji totally forgot to play along with megumi’s pretend restaurant game, thinking the boy would halfway forget about it anyway. children’s attention spans are short after all.
seems like his kid is an exception.
“i ain’t eatin’ shit, boy,” toji grunts and turns megumi away, putting the boy back down in the sand between the two beach towels. you’re about to reprimand your husband for his behaviour before your child interrupts.
“this not poo poo!” megumi jabs a finger at his father’s chest, his voice a bit louder. he’s taken great offence to the comment about his imaginary burger, which was now but a cluster of sand particles.
toji snorts and gently flicks megumi’s hand away, “yeah, it is. bet it tastes like ‘poo poo’ too.”
“no! not poo poo!” megumi’s voice rings out before a frustrated whine leaves his lips. his little hands land on toji’s abs, physically punishing him for saying such mean stuff about his hard handiwork.
your husband sticks his tongue out childishly at his sulking son. “‘yes! yes ‘tis poo poo!’ keheh,” toji mocks megumi’s high voice, snorting as he laughs about his own joke afterwards.
the father-son duo bicker for a few more seconds before you sigh and speak up. “can you two just get along for once now? we’re in public, so behave,” you scold them as their voices seemed to get louder. you then glare at your immature husband. he could be such a man-child when it came to arguing with his son, “and you— you’re an adult, so act like one.”
the two of them instantly shut up and their heads turn towards you, their hands that were wrestling with each other also stopping mid-air. megumi pouts and stops attacking his father with his tiny fists. the little boy knows better than to not listen to his mother.
in turn, toji huffs and grumbles something under his breath before grabbing his son to make it up to him.
neither does the grown man dare to defy his wife’s demands.
“yeah, yeah. c’mere, son,” toji responds and places the toddler on his chest, letting the kid rest against him. megumi surprisingly doesn’t pull away and instead curls up in toji’s warm embrace. as much as the two love to (playfully) fight, they also get along extremely well.
you smile and relax back on the palms of your hands. “much better,” you hum in content. your heart swells with affection for your two favorite people on earth. megumi is a carbon copy of his father and it’s the cutest little thing ever.
they both have that subtle pout on their lips as they accommodate to being close and cozy with each other again.
toji runs his callused fingers through megumi’s hair, sighing as he closes his eyes. he doesn’t admit it out loud, but he cares for his kid. if he had to make a choice between either saving his own life or megumi’s, toji’d instantly draw his last breath.
“he’s still a brat,” your husband grumbles to you, sharp eyes watching the way you coddle and coo over the toddler. megumi’s chubby cheek is smushed against toji’s chest and it was an adorable sight. you giggle and capture it on your phone.
toji scoffs, but can’t help the grin tugging at the corner of his scarred lips. he gently rubs the child’s cheek with his knuckles before continuing, “but he’s my brat. ain’t that right, boy?”
megumi lets out a small, soft grunt at his father’s words. the kid is completely silent, content with the way things had played out. perhaps this is what he secretly searched for as well— to receive toji’s attention and a glimpse of his affection.
“aww, how cute!” your smile is beaming as you snap another picture of your family. toji’s soft look is perfectly captured on your phone, with him gently touching megumi’s chubby cheek as the boy laid on his bare chest. pure domestic bliss.
you sigh and look away for one second to change the lockscreen on your phone. humming, you go to your settings and instantly put the picture of your husband and son as your wallpaper on nearly everything.
you tilt your head back only to find toji grinning from ear to ear now, going from gently rubbing megumi’s cheek to full out squishing them between both his hands, amused at the way the fat moves. “kehehe, look at ‘em,” he chuckles.
the little toddler eventually gets fed up with it after squirming and grunting. megumi brings his little fist up—the same one that still had some sand stored from before—and lets the content fly all over toji’s face.
megumi giggles and scrambles off toji’s lap with a victorious grin. he points at his father who’s struggling with getting the sand off his face, the man sputtering and grumbling. he sticks his tongue out, “tha’s papa’s burger.”
you watch as your son waddles over to you and hides into your arms, muffled laughter echoing in your ears. seems like megumi won the battle in the end; successfully holding onto the sand he was planning to feed his dad one way or another.
toji spits out a bit of sand that flew into his mouth from the kid’s surprise attack, “you little shit—”
well, there goes the peace again. you shake your head, but let the two play and fight it out on their own.
. . . just another day in the fushiguro family.
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cursingtoji · 1 year ago
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listening to ghost and soap infamous “are you ugly?” conversation and not being able to stop thinking about what ghost meant by “quite the opposite”
you’re used to having him wearing his mask even whenever you two escape to blow off some steam, but since that day you’ve been building up some courage to ask the same thing soap tried to.
“take it off” you murmur with your lips inches away from his mask while setting a pace riding him.
Ghost, who was spread out on the couch raised his head, “y’r gettin’ spoiled, brat. last week was a kiss now you want my whole face?” he gives your ass a mean slap.
“’s not fair” you pout, whilst you are completely naked every time, simon only removes his shirt when you beg, maybe lowers his pants down to his ankles instead of just enough to let out his cock, but that’s it.
“Aight, want me to lose the mask?” he takes your black shirt, folding it sloppily until it’s narrow then he puts around your eyes tying on the back of your head.
“simon! no!” you raise your hands to undo it, he’s faster though, taking both your wrists and holding in the air. you hear some fumbling and suddenly your palms are being tickled by a stubble, you gasp realizing under your hands is ghost’s uncovered face.
“keep ridin’” he demands, adjusting his body to lay lower and thrusting you from bellow as a reminder he’s still inside.
you bite your lips, needing to put a hand on his chest as support, your other hand explores his face trying to paint a mental image of him.
his jawline is sharp, a few uneven parts along his skin, probably scars, there’s more hair on his chin than the rest of his jaw and to imagine simon with a blond goatee make you clench.
“shit” he curses tightening the grip on your hips, “what’re you so excited ‘bout, private? huh?” he pinches your nipple. you run your fingertips on his bottom lip, it’s thin and he could use some lip balm, but the excitement about touching him in such a intimate way gives you hope to one day convince him to let you apply lip balm on his lips, “behave” he growls.
“‘m behaving, sir” you smile sheepishly forgetting he can actually see your face. ghost takes your hand, making you close it and leaving just your index up. under the improvised blindfold you frown, next his lips are wrapping around your finger and his tongue is under your digit.
your clit throbs, not expecting this from your lieutenant.
“fuck, Lt.” you arch your back, approaching your orgasm.
“faster” both his hands are gripping your ass, he groans and you feel the vibration on your finger. you obey as one does, slapping your ass on his mighty thighs, as he sucks your finger, even letting some saliva run down your palm.
“si-mon ‘m close” you lose yourself on the sensation, seeing nothing makes you more aware of the stretch his cock gives you, not to mention the sounds your lieutenant is trying to hold. with one last suck he removes your finger, moving it to your own clit, where he presses it on your bud.
“cum then” you’re so close, but that’s one thing you still want.
“can i kiss you?” you edge yourself waiting for his answer, he sighs and you take it as a negative response, but his other hand leaves your ass as he guides your face to his where his lips awaited yours, he immediately pushes his tongue in, that’s merely your second kiss and you’re already coming.
“louder, i think the terrorists haven’t heard ya” he teases when you moan a high pitched note.
“fuck you, sir” you’re still riding him intensely, knowing he’s close too. he bites your lip, forcing your hips up and down faster and groaning as he fills your insides.
by the time you remove the blindfold, his mask is back on and you sigh in defeat, moving away from his lap and getting one last spank.
“goatee” you whisper in soap’s ear as he is about to eat his morning scrambled eggs.
“wut?” he turns to you.
“he has a goatee” you wink and leave to get your own breakfast. poor johnny is still processing what was said when ghost enters the room, later than usual.
soap drops his fork.
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