#but these lines Gun just said to Vegas? oh my god

[raksh-writes]

Oh to write a line that is such an emotional punch to the gut you have to take a break and maybe even go on a walk, like oof

[anatrik]

First thoughts TTPD:

What a lana x folklore girlie win this issss!

1.Fortnight is about matty?? HAHAHAHA also why did this make me think of when holt was going running with the ladies when he was in witness protection??? Crying. Fav line has to be they were supposed to take me away but they forgot to come and get me. So sad but also so cool in relation to her cancellation/return. 10/10

2. TTPD- not so hahahaha anymore IS THIS ACTUALLY A FUCKING MATTY HEALY ALBUM??? There was a typewriter at the 1975 show she performed anti-hero at? Unless its somehow about harry? Who else is tattooed on her roster??? Or is this about herself? Kinda feel like modern idiots/who’s going to decode is directed at us lol😂 9/10?

3.My boy only breaks his favourite toys- went in expecting mad woman rage. Pleasantly surprised. king of my heart to queen of sandcastles he destroys….DESTROYED ME. Are you fucking kidding me rn? Im caling it. Best song. Im crying at 7.30 am this is not funny anymore. Also THANK YOU FOR NOT SLANDERING DAD. I knew you wouldnt let us down like that. Also the chorus sounds like long story short😭 oh this is so sad. Once i fix me hes going to miss me? He was my best friend?😭 he runs because he loves me? Stopp😭😭 1000000/10

4.Down bad- ….aaaand we’re back to MATTY AGAIN? He does not deserve this spotlight but why are all the song so goood😭😭😭 is this why artists love to date problematic men? It unlocks some extraordinary potential? Crazy crazy girl😭 also stay down (bad) 🤌🏾 shes done it again 10/10 also for personal reasons i will be believing this is about joe in that Tom/Joe/met gala overlap period when she was photographed going to the gym a lot and that this is about all that yearning please let it be about that plesplesplesplesplesples also down bad waking up in blood staring at the sky…like i lost a twin is giving bigger than the whole sky🥺

5. So long, london- so so long long, lon-don DONE? ok miss girl😭 the hoax parallels😭 dont be undoing the song i was going to play at my weddddding what is wrong with you😭 my only one my smoking gun to two graves one gun youll find someone??? Also reminds me of la la land :/ how much sad did you think I had in me? You wrote hoax so a lot ok leave us alone. crying again. 10000000000000000/10 oh lol its a track 5 ofc it is😂

6. But daddy I love him- she really said if you ever liked, shared or even LOOKED at the ‘vivaa las vegas’ memes you cant come to the wedding and shes so real for it. Lfgggg. Ubothered unhinged uhmazing. Growing up precocious sometimes means you still hold on to that princess/quarterback wattpad fantasy AS IS YOUR RIGHT QUEEN GO THE FUCK OFF🥳 100000/10 calling out toxic fandom for the first time and we love to see it🫡 this is suchhhh a happy songggg you deserve ALL the chaos and revelry.

7. Fresh out the slammer- god she gets it. Like sure he was great and he is still my biological father and everything but as a decidedly melancholy person myself who has constantly had atleast one close friend in a deep depression I can see how all that heavy lifting can just get heavy at some point especially when youre a partner and their sole lighthouse in wtv storms be out there buffeting their mental health. Its not for everyone and thats so fair and so valid but so sad as well. 10/10 for the honesty.

8. Florida- she really said girlrot summer🫡 this is the lanaest song ever. So lucky one/nothing new coded. This will be the First song I repeat and then so long london. Aaaghhh how i love a self aware melancholic anxious little superstar. 90283749292/10 thank you for giving florence an entire verse whew. Little did you know your home’s really only a town you’re just a guest in is soooo going on my body forever

9. Guilty as sin?- honestly just fuck if it means we dont have to hear about how desirable ratty healy is man ffs. IThe only reason he looks so hot is bc hes forbidden. You have to trust me on this. He’s sooo mid JESUS. U cant be writing hozier lyrics about a man that hasn’t met a shower😭 1000000/10 writing. -16392992/10 content. Unrequited love/lust truly is the greatest weapon in a poets arsenal bc where is this energy in the joe songs binch?😭 this is such a teen in love with a 26 yo creep who called me so mature for my age mom you just dont get ittt anthem😂😂

10. Who’s afraid of little old me?- is a warning 😂 im so here for it. Like yes I still hate matty with all my heart and soul but yes I agree fans should not be allowed so much of an opinion on another persons life and yes I should be afraid (I am). She said aight love letter era over I AM WRITING YOU ALL HATE MAIL AND I’M HAND DELIVERING IT. Shes sooo done pretending to be the relatable girl next door when she’s anything but and is now reminding us of it and yes yes yessss girl OWN ITTTTTTTT. I’ve been saying for agesssss that there is a darkness under all that sunshine from where she clawed her way to the top and this is sooo vindicating. 10000000000000/10 favourite song ever. Mad woman wishes she was who’s afraid of little old me. I am unwell. I am in love. This is the Taylor Swift i stan. The marketing genius the calculating business woman the puppet master with narcotics in her songs thats why we sing along🫡 she so can handle a dangerous man

11. I can fix him (no really I can)- you cant.

12. loml- ofc. OFC. Its the saddest song of all time. OFC. Fuck offf ughhhh. 😭😭😭😭😭 its giving happiness. Its giving divorce. i am a child of a broken home now and my parents still love each other and hold so much regret still. What do i do with thissss? Im just a little girl taylorrr! 1002380292011010101/10 soo so gooood.

13. I can do it with a broken heart- first of all track 13. Love it. Second of all the upbeat barbieness of it all. Third of all I FINALLY PLACED IT. Shes in her unrelatable era. She is not your girl next door. You will never understand her life. She is as much a phenomenon as a person and we literally only see as much as she allows us to and honestly if i have to get put in my place theres noooo better way to have it done. Im having such a great time actually. 10 BILLION TRILLION OUT OF 10 you tellll em girl you FUCKING TELL EM.

14. Smallest man who ever lived- not going to speculate on who it is bc they clearly had a serious problem and its not a joke but damn :/ thats so sad :/ hope they get help? Didnt expect this to be what the song was about at all?

15. The alchemy- she said TRAVIS IS MY BOY WITH HER WHOLE CHEST😌 10/10

16. Clara bow- did she just name drop herself ? I was so right about unrelatable era. Also the Subtle nod to olivia/sabrina noted and appreciated. Lucky one/castles crumbling (mature version) fr fr. Solid legacy song.

17. The black dog- shared your secrets with and location is the same whiplash as a red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground with no one around to tweet it🤌🏾 joe songs hit so so different 😭😭😭 1000000000/10

18. imgonnagetyouback- the valiant roar was not so valiant and more of a mew i guess. 7/10

19. The albatross- oh this is the ONE. The album defining song for sureeee. Mad woman on coke. A rose by any other name is a scandal???? Thats my religion right there. Little last great American dynasty twist there at the end! Fuck yea. She does reallly try to warn the men in her life have to give her that. One gazillion/10

20. Clearly god has favourites and they are the ppl called chloe or sam or sophia or marcus😭 ALSO this song is about joe for sure. The internet starlet hasss to be delaney rowe!!!! It HAS TO BE. 10/10

21. How did it end?- shes back for the fans😂 plot twist the breakup is with yall🤌🏾 but yesss say it louder! One gasp and then how did it end. So good. 100/10

22. So high school- lmao aristotle grand theft auto ONLYY taylor swift man😭😂 you know what you want and boy you got her🫡🫡 11/10

23. I hate it here- mother’s having a mental breakdown kids yk the drill🤌🏾 10/10

24. ThanK you aIMiee- what better way to say fuck you to a hater than to thank her for jumpstarting your legacy my god!!! She is insane for this. The capitalisation is a bit petty tho ngl. 8/10

25. I look in peoples windows- once again I thank you for the kindness and respect shown to joe. Never doubted you but thank you nevertheless. 10/10 short as nice to have a friend but it didnt need to be longer.

26. The prophecy- its so sad and humbling to see even a woman at where she is having to beg for love bc that literally is the nature of love. Something humiliating, to have to beg for 🤷‍♀️ cards playing out like fools in a fable cursed like eve got bitten. No one writes like her damn. 10/10

27. Cassandra- very madeline miller on this one. Love love loveee modern takes on tragic greek women. 100/10

28. Peter- ah fuck. This one is going to hurt (it did). 1000000/10 my ribs get the feeling she did😭 all her joe related aches are so bone deeeep ugh. Promises oceans deep but never to keep😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 oh god it hurtsss it hurts it hurtss

29. The bolter- curious child ever reviled except by her father wow.

30. Robin- OMG! I needed this song growing up sooo bad. That way to go tiger felt so so warm like running into a kitchen after a day of being in the mud and u tell ur mum the silly things u did and shes genuinely interested and impressed by your smol victories. A bajillion/10

31. The manuscript- postmortem of every ex ever🤌🏾 love it.

[alvertesongdiary]

Father John Misty - I Guess Time Just Makes Fools of Us All

Our naked bodies go on trial Just for laughing at the joke Just for saying of the bargain What any sales girl already knows Most of us old men die at the firing line Just waiting for our number to be called I guess time just makes fools of us all

Now the king regales his stepsons When he’s loaded as a gun Says a real man is like a country You need a map to find you one Now why do you ‘spose You must approach the throne With its back up against the wall I guess time just makes fools of us all

The great-ish minds of my generation Gladly conscripted in the war Of defending any Goliath That would deign darken the door Now with your genius for picking battles It’s no wonder every helmet is too small I guess time just makes fools of us all (Mm) I guess time just makes fools of us all

My drink is watered down The champ is on his knees He lost the rematch He lost the comeback He lost for charity But that’s the job That’s what gets the asses in the hall They came for a beating (Hm) And he came to brawl

Go and serve your client notice That of all young gods I have known Yours is easily the least famous To turn down the cover of The Rolling Stone Lily white white faces so familiar And yet impossible to recall I guess time just makes fools of us all

After a millennia of good times God said “Hey now, let’s have a dream” Where we raise the stakes a little Come on let’s make things interesting Parachute into the Anthropocene An amnesiac, a himbo Ken doll I guess time just makes fools of us all

I killed a rattlesnake this morning It was coiled up behind the truck Put it in reverse and hit it clean Something he said went in and stuck “Hey I can sell you a million records “I mean your image could use an overhaul “Don’t you know time just makes fools of us all?”

Headlights headed southbound The loser’s exodus That’s where you’ll find me: in Las Vegas Doing my greatest hits Me and Dixie, had ourselves a ball I followed my dreams And my dreams said to crawl

The groom is a liar And the bride is a shill The priest says “If these two don’t make it, who among us ever will?” Don’t ask the love you dare for a prediction Wherein the lovers of tomorrow are involved I guess time just makes fools of us all (Oh) I guess time just makes fools of us all (Oh) I guess time just makes fools of us all

05/08/2024

[wingsy-keeper-of-songs]

Mass Effect Trilogy Tag

Lovingly borrowed from a great Mass Effect blog @whiskynorocks ya'll should go follow them they're rad as hell and have excellent taste

Been a fan since: I'd heard great things about the series since 3 came out but I never had the opportunity to play it until this year. I can safely say I'm pretty hooked.

Favorite game of the series: 2, without a doubt. There are things I loved about 1 and 3 but 2 stood out to me especially with the writing and how I developed my relationships with my crew. I wasn't thrilled about joining forces with Space Terrorists, but at least I was able to walk away from TIM at the end of it.

MaleShep or FemShep? FemShep, hands down. I do have a BroShep save, but he's not as...invested as FemShep is.

Earthborn, Colonist or Spacer? Colonist or Earthborn for FemShep, Earthborn or Spacer for BroShep

Paragon or Renegade? Heavy on the Paragade. I usually try to go mostly Paragon, but there are some motherfuckers that need slapping

Biotics or Tech? I like Tech but I go Biotics more often than not

Favorite class: Oh Vanguard full stop. Give me a shotgun and biotic charge and I'm up on the front lines gunning down assholes like I was born for it

Favorite companion: Garrus, but also Tali, Wrex, Legion, Kasumi, Zaeed, Vega, and Liara when she didn't sell my body to terrorists

Least favorite companion: Miranda (strictly just due to ability, tbh), Ashley (I saved her a few times, I get that she has a lot of emotional baggage and the way that the Alliance treats her is extremely wrong, but I just can't like her ya'll. I'm sorry. I've tried.)

My squad selection: Who wants to third wheel with me and the Space Kitty? In all seriousness, it's usually Shep, Garrus, and Tali in 1 unless I switch Tali for Kaiden a few times. Or Wrex if I need more fire power lol. In 2, soon as I get Garrus, I tend to keep him around for everything save Tali's trial since I like to bring Legion to that just to be a troll. Mostly, it's just me and the Dream Team. Vega third wheeled a lot in 3, though lol

Favorite in-game romance: Shakarian for the long haul, baby. But Talibrations is also extremely adorable too. My BroShep is hella bi so he's romancing Kaiden after losing Ash in Virmire and he's Damaged™ so maybe Kaiden can fix him

Other pairings I like: Tali/Reeger (that dude was so in love with her it's amazing), EDI/Joker, Wrex/Bakura, Nyreen/Aria, Cortez/Vega

Favorite NPC: Anderson, Councilor Sparatus because he's a dick but he comes through for you in the end, Saren, Nihlus for the five seconds you get to know him, Kirrahe, Nyreen Kandros, Primarch Victus, Aria (she's very hot), the bartender in the Asari bar, Biotic God Volus, Padok Wikks

Favorite antagonist: SOVEREIGN. Hands down, he is the most terrifying thing you encounter in the games. He's just so other, so alien, and so...mechanical. His lines are delivered with this matter-of-fact contempt that is so perfect for a sentient machine. He has no motive other than he just Is. And I love that. Harbinger never shut up, but Sovereign knew when to start and end a conversation. He said his piece and he said nothing more. And that is exactly how you introduce an Eldritch Being.

Favorite mission: Noveria. I loved meeting Lorik, and how the whole thing spirals down from dirty business deals to all out creep-fest when you encounter the Rachni. And the Rachni Queen's voice acting was stellar. She was just sympathetic enough to warrant pause from outright killing her and terrifying enough to consider it.

Favorite loyalty mission: Its a tie in between Garrus and Kasumi. Garrus for how it ties into his relationship with Shepard and just how their death truly affected him and how it reflects on his character (I have only allowed him to shoot Sidonis once, and it was not a good feeling). And Kasumi because dressing Shepard up is always a good time and Kasumi is a sassy, classy lady who lost someone dear to her and giving her that closure she needs makes me happy for her. She deserves pretty things. She's also cute as hell.

Favorite DLC: Either Citadel, Omega (for Nyreen), or Overlord because David's story made me cry. I'm also autistic and the story was handled very well with Shepard being so furiously angry that the Paragon Interrupt was to pistol whip Gavin was very cathartic for me.

Control, Synthesis or Destroy? 100% Destroy. I do not and will not trust the Walmart-brand Alexa that is the Catalyst. That little asshole is dying with the rest of those genocidal machines.

Favorite weapon: The Talon Heavy Pistol. Baby can pack a punch.

Favorite place: I actually really love the beauty of the Ardat Yakshi monastery. I hate that the Reapers destroy it and turn it into someplace so nightmarish but it really was such a beautiful building and felt really peaceful beforehand.

A quote I like: "You exist because we allow it, and you will end because we demand it."

[usertoxicyaoi]

oh pete should definitely be the one to kill vegas' dad that would only intensify his obsession for him

hiiiii anon!!!

no listen. ive already talked about my absolute NEED in pete being the one to kill vegas' dad in cold blood here. but i guess i wanna be a little bit more fucked up about it. so here goes.

that Bastard. vegas' dad. has got so much POWER over vegas that even in his absence, vegas is embodying him. i've mentioned about how vegaspete perfectly emulate what cycles of abuse look like. vegas' dad abuses vegas and that leads to vegas abusing pete.

the show hasnt even GONE into the sexual abuse and sexual violence that vegas' dad put vegas through when vegas was still just a CHILD, getting him to sleep with grown ass men to fix and secure deals, but yeah, in my head, show! vegas is also a victim of sexual exploitation and sexual abuse too, bc the behaviours he shows .... feel too well orchestrated. too well practiced and tried out and experimented and experienced and lived. and it will not have me surprised one bit at all if vegas has done this to other guys too that he's slept with.

and in a way doing this gives him his turn. its his turn to have some power and control which he didnt have as a kid when he was being abused physically, mentally and sexually.

his dad did not stop it even once. and vegas has spent his LIFE sheltering macau from it all, so that macau doesnt go through the same things he did, just like an older sibling would do.

and you know what, there's gotta/gonna reach a point where vegas can't carry on any longer. he is gonna become exhuasted and pete even SAID that to him yesterday (is this the way you're supposed to be living? its upto you vegas, its your choice.). and yesterday we SAW vegas talk back to his dad and say to him (you think i wanted to be your son?).

and so vegas takes all that hurt and pain and history and hopelessness and helplessness for his situation and his anger and rage and grief and turmoil and sadness out onto pete. he once again calls him a pet. bc vegas himself has been used by his dad as one. pete's line about emotional projection? about being human and having feelings? vegas is the EXACT other side of it to their coin. its just that vegas doesnt see a way out of this cycle, but pete does. and vegas so BADLY would want to find some kinda loophole too, if only he could.

and its WEIRD. bc when vegas said to pete that just bc we had sex doesnt mean you can run your mouth, it somehow so very intrinsically paralleled with when pete said to vegas that his dad still didnt stop beating him up despite pete finally winning his boxing fight. like. even that is a cycle of abuse they've gone round. where pete is made to feel absolutely useless and worthless, his freedom and agency, the one thing he VALUES, completely taken away from him.

and this isnt about reclaiming it back again. pete cannot allow himself to go through that ever again. its about putting an absolute end. a FULL STOP to it. and if its about being with vegas, then in this case, it is about digging out that root and cutting it before it festers any longer. and oh god i SO badly need it to be pete to be the one that does it. he's got absolutely no attachments to that man. none. and itd just be swift and clinical. one bullet is all it'll take to blow his brains out or put a hole in his chest. just like how vegas' dad wanted vegas to kill pete, and handed the bullets in the gun to him to do so.

and pete sees it. HE SEES what vegas has the ability to be. and he SEES just what ONE visit from his father does to him. and he SEES what vegas needs. and what vegas doesnt need.

and what vegas doesnt need, is his father.

[papakhan]

Jessup the Companion

This is very long! Includes voice lines, quest interactions, personal quest and endings! Based on a Template by @nukaworld here​

Basic info:

Race: White

Gender: Male

Affiliation: Great Khans

Role: Great Khan Warrior, Squad leader

Location: Boulder City, Red Rock Canyon

Base SPECIAL: S6, P5, E7, C4, I3, A6, L4

Tagged skills: Guns, Melee, Survival

Perks: Fast Shot

The Courier of course meets Jessup at Boulder City and after confronting him about Benny he will tell you where he is and give you his lighter. If you resolve the conflict of Boulder City Showdown peacefully--or by killing or all the NCR soldiers, you get the opportunity to invite Jessup to travel with you to get revenge on Benny.

Jessup tells the Courier that while he does want to see Benny pay for the deaths of two of his brothers, he needs to make sure the remains of his squad gets back to Red Rock unharmed. 

Once at Red Rock, the Courier will then have to convince Jessup that they’re trustworthy enough to travel with, either with Good Khan reputation [”I've helped the Khans already, you can't trust me after that?”] or a speech check [”Benny wronged both of us, I can help you get revenge for your brother.”]

Companion Perk: O’ Mighty Khan

The Great Khans were once the mightiest gang of raiders in the wasteland. To some they still are! Enemies including Fiends, Jackals, Vipers, Powder Gangers, Scorpions, and Greasers are 3x more likely to flee from battle with Jessup by your side.

Companion Comments:

Use Melee: “Tch, yeah I can do that.” / “Did I dome you a little too hard? I've been using melee this whole time.”

Use Ranged: “You’re payin’ for ammo.” / “Trying to say something funny about my aim huh? I'm already using my gun.”

Open inventory: “I’m glad I put these extra pockets in--shit where’s my switch.”

Overburdened: “Just because Khans can walk for miles carrying everything they own, don't mean I'm gonna do it for you.”

Stay close: “You know I only swiped Benny’s lighter because he was a punk, right?”

Keep distance: “You better not lead me to trouble.”

Be Passive: “No problem, I’m not fixing for a fight.“

Be Aggressive: “No fuckin' problem. They won't know what hit 'em. It's gonna be me, I'm hitting them.”

Wait here: “God I hate waitin’ around--fine.”

Follow me: “About fuckin’ time.”

Sneaking: “Quiet yeah? I can be quiet--quiet’s my middle name. Jessup Quiet Khan. It’s not actually--oh right, sorry.”

“Let’s travel together”: “Still after Benny, yeah? Let’s go.” / “Need help on another job? Sure, I got time.”

“Let’s travel together” (already have a companion): “I’m all for travelling in big groups but uh--only if they’re all Khans. Ditch one of these punks and we can go. “

Leaving companion at the Lucky 38: “You know I can’t sleep in those creepy old buildings right?”

“I wanted to ask you some questions”: “Yeah? Like what?”

“Tell me about yourself”: “Me? Oh um. Well I was born a Khan, on the road to the Mojave, and I’ll die a Khan wherever I end up.”

“What do you think of the NCR?”: “You're kidding right? NCR's scum. That's all you need to know.”

“What do you think of the Legion?”: “I dunno. They're.... mm. I dunno. Papa likes ‘em. I think. But he likes anyone who messes with the NCR.”

“What do you think of Mister House?”: “Some robot or something, I don’t know. I remember when he came to the Khans back when we lived in Vegas. Told us to get out, we told him to fuck off, but when too many of us started dying, so Papa Khan pulled us out.”

“What do you know about Benny?”: “Scum. Next question.”

“What do you know about the platinum chip?”: “Like I said, just a big fancy poker chip. Benny liked flashing it around. I managed to swipe it one night. Tried biting it like you see people do with old coins but that didn’t tell me shit.”

Death: “Heh. You think I’ll come back like you did?”

The rest is going under a cut because like I said. this is very long

Jessup comments on various locations:

Goodsprings: “Wait I’ve been here before.... oh yeah haha”

Goodsprings Cemetery: “Wanna stare at the hole I dug for you? Yeah it’s pretty great.”

NCRCF: “Holy shit, there was a prison break? Do you think any Khans got out?”

Mojave Outpost: “Never seen that statue up close before... looks like shit.”

Nipton: “This uh... this weren’t here when we came through..”

Novac: “Not sure if Manny’s gonna let me back in after last time.”

The Strip: “Ugh... these lights make you feel sick too?”

Cottonwood Cove: “Something ain’t right.”

The Fort: “This ain’t like what Karl said at all...”

Red Rock Canyon: “You get used to the smell.”

Trivia and additional information:

Like Boone when approaching Legion territory, Jessup will pull the Courier aside when approaching NCR territory to tell them that any soldiers will see his jacket and fire at him, and that he will defend himself. The Courier can either tell Jessup that they plan on defending him as well, or can pass a high barter check to convince him to wear a disguise while passing through the territory. 

During the quest Ring a Ding, if the Courier fails to meet the credit check to pass into The Strip, Jessup will offer his contact in The Kings, Buddy, who can help them get in. 

During the quest High Times, Jessup can be given Dixon’s Jet or Dixon’s Whiskey to inspect in dialogue. He will inform the Courier that the chems may once have been Khan made, but are so diluted and poorly put together that they are "twice the harm, half the high”. The Courier can then use this information to scare Dixon away from providing chems to Bill Ronte and Jacob Hoff or else evoke the wrath of the Great Khans. The information Jessup provides can also be used in place of the science check requiring to use less equipment to help the two detox.

If taken to Chance’s Map, Jessup will initiate dialogue and tell the Courier about his other brother Chance, but not what happened to him.

If taken to Chance’s Grave, Jessup will again initiate dialogue and tell the Courier to keep away, and can explain what happened to Chance with a speech check. If the Courier has high enough intelligence they can bring up the strangeness of Chance’s death and suggest Benny is responsible. If the Courier attempts to open Chance’s Grave, Jessup will immediately leave the party and attack them.

If taken to Oscar Velaso during Climb Evry Mountain, Oscar will have unique dialogue suggesting that Jessup and the Courier will help him kill all the soldiers and refugees in Bitter Springs. The Courier can either follow through with this, though Jessup will comment that “this isn’t the Khan way”, convince him to just kill the soldiers at a half speech check, or convince him to return to Red Rock with a full speech check.

Faction NPCs have unique responses to Jessup:

Jacobstown Supermutants: Khans don’t normally get this close.

Powder Gangers: We had a few Khans serving with us, must of run back to Red Rock by now.

After the quest Why Can’t We Be Friends with convincing the Powder Gangers to join the Khans, the Powder Gangers will have new lines addressing Jessup asking him to put in a good word for them.

Vault 3 Fiends: Whatcha got for us spikey man?

Followers: I hope your people are doing well in Red Rock.

Great Khans: Running with Jesse huh? Take care of him alright?

Westsiders: Hey man, good to see you.

Freeside Locals: Remember when the Khans ruled this place? I’d take them over House.

NCR Citizens: I can’t believe they just let Khans walk around here like they own the place.

Strip Gamblers: Nice leathers tough guy.

Unmarked Quests ( Optional ):

O’ Buddy O’ Pal O’ Mine: Jessup’s friend in Vegas is a King named Buddy, he’s the guy who forwarded him the job offer from the Chairmen (and wrote the letter Jessup keeps in his pocket). If Jessup is a companion he can be spoken to and point the Courier in the direction of The King if they need a passport into The Strip.

If the Courier killed Jessup and took the letter, they can still talk to Buddy and confront him about it, however if revealed that they killed Jessup at Boulder City, Buddy will turn hostile and killing him will turn the rest of The Kings hostile as well.

Snookered: If the Courier attempts to meet with Benny in the penthouse, or tries to sleep with him, Jessup takes the Courier aside and tells them that he’s got a funny feeling about this. He waits outside while the Courier goes to the room.

With Jessup as a companion after Benny’s goons attempt to kill the Courier, it’s not Benny who answers the intercom but Jessup, who tells you he chased down Benny after he tried to run and managed to kill him. He’ll apologise for stealing your kill but saves you from having to chase Benny to the Fort.

Or if the Courier sleeps with Benny and lets him live, they will awake to find that Jessup killed him as he tried to escape in the night. He will mock you for sleeping with Benny for the rest of the game, but also save you from going to the Fort.

Personal Quest - Born to be Wild

Quest Triggers: Immediately after killing Benny, Jessup will initiate dialogue. He tells the courier that killing Benny didn’t make him feel any better about--well, anything really. With two dead brothers and a home that’s falling apart, Jessup feels lost. If the Courier offers their help, the quest begins.

Quest Description: Jessup will explain that everything he’s been through, from the Khans being pushed out of Vegas and Bitter Springs, to his brothers dying all the way up to being surrounded and almost killed by the NCR is really starting to weigh him down. Now without Chance or McMurphy, he feels unsupported and aimless.

Jessup will ask the Courier to take him back to Red Rock Canyon and ask them to spend the night. In the early morning he wakes them up to say that he couldn’t sleep. That everything felt wrong. The Courier can ask what will make him feel better and he will tell them that he wants to feel like a Khan again, but when he was young, with his brothers. He doesn’t like what the Khans have become, he didn’t like seeing what their chems did to Chance and doesn’t want any part of the peddling the Khans have become famous for. He wants to go back to the days where the Khans were remembered for something else, something bigger.

Jessup suggests raiding an NCR caravan he spotted leaving the Outer Vegas area, and from here the courier has one of three options. They can suggest that they, Jessup and a fistful of chems would be enough against the caravan; tell him to gather some Khans and then attack; or try to convince him not to attack the caravan.

Regardless of what the courier chooses, Jessup will attack the caravan alone. After the fight, he will react to the Courier’s choice. He will tell them that attacking the caravan didn’t make him feel better, and he says that he thinks he needs to talk to someone else who understands.

Jessup will make three suggestions that the Courier can speak to. Bo, a disillusioned Follower who joined the Khans after relations between the two factions fell apart; Papa Khan, the obvious; or Harley Davidson, a former New Khan who lives away from the rest.

Bo advises that, despite his misgivings towards the Followers, professional therapy is likely the best choice. Though Bo warns the courier that very few Khans have ever been convinced to pursue such a thing. Alternatively, Papa Khan suggests that what Jessup needs is to let himself fall back on the Khans. The massacre was not long ago and many Khans know exactly how Jessup is feeling, and they can mourn together. Finally, Harley suggests that sometimes you just need to be away from everyone and alone with your thoughts. She protects Red Rock from a distance, working on her grief by shooting up cazadors deep into the mountains.

Jessup naturally leans towards Papa Khans advise, but can be swayed by the Courier either way.

Jessup decides that there’s too much going on right now, and he wants to get away just for a little while. He asks to meet the Courier at Chance’s grave, because he never got to give Chance or McMurphy a real Khan burial. He asks that the Courier collects some things for him before they meet, including flowers, fruit and some torches.

Once the Courier has collected what he’s asked for, they can bring them to him where he will give his brothers a ceremony. He explains to the Courier that he’ll light the torches for McMurphy, but because Chance hated fire, he’ll extinguish them when he’s done instead of letting them burn out on their own.

Afterwards he talks to the Courier for the last time and, based on choices they made, will tell them what he’s decided to do. To either ask the Followers for help, mourn with the Khans, or go it alone. The courier still has a chance to sway his choice but only with a high speech check.

Outcomes:  Convince Jessup to seek professional help from the Followers of the Apocalypse and he will become more stable, but lose his fighting edge.

Convince Jessup to seek help from his fellow Khans and will be become somewhat stable, and put his energy into becoming a better fighter.

Convince Jessup to reject help and cope alone and he will become even more unstable, to the point that the Khans become concerned and even fearful of him.

Endings

Jessup dies:

Any: Though Jessup was a mighty warrior, he, like his brothers, and like many Khans before him, succumbed to the wasteland.

The Khans are wiped out (Khan suicide attack on the Dam, NCR victory but Khans did not change sides, Legion victory but the Khans fought for NCR):

Any: Ever loyal, Jessup fought bravely for the Khans on Hoover Dam. It didn’t matter what he had learnt or how he had changed, he could not escape the Khan’s destiny. Shot down by his enemy and bleeding out under the sun, Jessup wondered if any of this had been worth it.

The Khans refuse absorption into the Legion (as per my rewritten khan legion ending)

Khan/Follower Jessup:  Despite all that he had learnt from the Followers/his fellow Khans, and all that he had healed from his hardships, Jessup was amoung the first Khans to fall to the Legion. Betrayed by the same Courier who Jessup believed had forgiven him, he was killed by a recruit who got lucky that one of the Khan’s mightiest warriors was too stunned to fight back.

Alone Jessup: Enraged by the Courier’s betrayal, Jessup fought against the Legion with all his might. If any Khan had survived the Legion’s attack, they would have remembered Jessup’s final battle for generations. But no Khan lived to see Jessup finally cut down by the Legate.

The Khans are relocated by the NCR

Follower Jessup: Jessup fought at the Dam for the Khans, not for the NCR. Though he was a warrior, his time with the followers made him more reflective on his actions. When he hesitated to kill a Legionary who resembled his brother, a nearby NCR soldier took him for a traitor, and shot him in the back.

Khan Jessup: Jessup reluctantly follows the Khans to their new home. Without Papa Khan, and with no hope for the future, the Khans slip deeper into their mourning. Jessup, like his brother, retreated to substances to drown his sorrows. And sometimes when he’s drunk enough he can still see his brothers.

Alone Jessup: Jessup refused to be moved a second time by the NCR. He quickly became a wanted outlaw in the Mojave, gunning down caravans of any kind and smuggling resources back to the Khans. But one day the steady stream of supplies stopped, and the Khans knew a bounty hunter had finally claimed his reward.

The Khans move to Wyoming

Follower Jessup: Jessup continued to visit the Followers until the Khans departure from the Mojave. During the trek north, Jessup recognised that his fellow Khans had never moved on from Bitter Springs, and walked aimlessly just as he had done not long ago. He took it upon himself to help his family just as the Followers had helped him. By the time the Khans reunited with the Followers in Wyoming, Jessup had all but given up life as a Khan warrior, and had become a pillar of support and guidance to his peers. He lived to a good age, and died well loved.

Khan Jessup: Jessup visited his brother’s grave one last time before riding the road to Wyoming with his kin. He promised one day he would return, once the Mojave had finally settled. In the North, Jessup made a good life for himself, establishing two good trade routes that he named after his brothers. Many years later Jessup did return to the Mojave with his children and grandchildren. As he stood at his brother’s grave, he wondered if that courier who’d cheated death, still lived.

Alone Jessup: Jessup was almost left behind by the Khans, only a persistent few were able to track him down and convince him to leave his brothers behind. There was no familiarity of home in Wyoming, Jessup tried his best to adjust, he could never bring himself to live amongst his people again. For generations, Jessup was remembered as a ghost, a distant man who guided lost souls to their final resting place.

[seek-its-opposite]

photosensitivity | wc: 2156 | ao3

prompt from @catarinquar 65. "look at me—just breathe, okay?”

post-demons. warning: some references to suicidal ideation 

*****

Twelve hours after almost shooting his partner, Fox Mulder is released from the hospital in satisfactory health. His partner, whose health is decidedly unsatisfactory, is entrusted with his care. As she signs her name at the bottom of the release form she avoids eye contact with the nurses, half convinced that if they look at her they won’t let her leave. Lately she’s been thinking of howlers.

Scully, silent and reckless, drives them both two hours out of Rhode Island before stopping at a motel on the Connecticut-New York state line. The clouds are threatening what looks to be a hell of a mid-afternoon storm, and she doesn’t want to be on the road with him when it hits. She leaves her rumpled partner in the car with the window cracked while she goes to the front desk, glancing back possessively over her shoulder as the woman behind the counter gets their keys. One room, two beds. “I’m not letting you out of my sight, Mulder.”

She keeps seeing him like she found him, on his knees before the ghosts of his childhood. She sees him praying to the barrel of his gun.

By the time the rain slaps the window Mulder is lying stiff as a board on top of the cheap comforter, hands flat at his side. Scully, doing a poor job at concentrating on the dog-eared copy of Into the Wild she stole from his apartment, eyes him from the corner. The lamp beside her flickers and hums. Lightning flares through the blinds, cutting Mulder in half diagonally like a Vegas magician.

Extreme photosensitivity, the doctor had said, scrawling notes for her on things to look out for. She looks for curtains to close and finds none.

“Shit,” she mutters.

“Scully?” Mulder squints at her from the bed.

“Just the storm.”

He closes his eyes again. “Hey, Scully, if April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring?”

She doesn’t even have time to decide whether to indulge him. The next bolt of lightning is close, flashing white-hot outside the window just seconds before the thunder claps. Mulder cries out and grabs his head, sitting up so quickly he slides off the side of the mattress and hits the floor with a crash.

“Mulder!”

He’s unresponsive when she reaches him, flat on his back and glassy eyed on the carpet. Scully crouches at his side.

“Mulder,” she prompts, more measured this time. “Can you hear me?”

She feels his pulse racing in his neck and moves her other hand to his chest, spreading her palm across his stupid, hot-blooded heart. After a second Mulder blinks and focuses on her. He winces and sits up, letting out a long breath.

“Easy,” Scully warns. She grabs his shoulder and guides him, gently, so he’s facing her, sitting against the side of the bed with his left knee at his chest. He slumps back, his arm lolling across his knee.

“I saw my mom,” he says. His voice is rough. “With the cancer man.”

“You have no way of knowing if that’s true.”

“I have no way of knowing if it’s a memory,” he counters. “I know it’s true.”

He leans his head back against the comforter and shuts his eyes.

Scully rests her hand on Mulder’s forehead, her pinkie in his hair and her thumb stroking his brow. His hairline is sweaty. “Mulder, the lightning isn’t good for you,” she murmurs. “It’s triggering your seizures.”

Mulder huffs out a laugh. She wonders what he sees behind those eyelids. “Maybe if you show the storm your badge,” he suggests.

She almost smiles. “I’ll do that.”

The room lights up again. She has to get him out of here. Scully pushes herself off the floor, patting Mulder’s leg as she stands. He looks up at her. “I was kidding,” he says.

“I’ll be right back.”

The bathroom has no window. It’s short on floor space, but if she folds a towel for him to sit in front of the bathtub here, folds another in front of the sink here—with the door closed it should work. There’s a shell-shaped night light plugged into the outlet; she flips the switch and the room glows faint pink, so warm and sweet she’s overcome with love with it for a second. Dana, look at you, she thinks. You can’t tell the difference between a panic room and a home.

“Come here,” she says to Mulder, and holds out her hand. She pulls him to his feet.

When he sees the bathroom he says, “I didn’t realize we checked into the Ritz.”

She replies, “I used your card.”

They sit on worn towels in their socks with their knees touching. In the shadows she can almost trick herself into thinking they’re on a stakeout.

“You don’t have to stay in here,” he tells her, trying to sound casual. “If anything happens I’ll just scream in agony.” He doesn’t pull off the joke.

“I’m good,” she soothes.

He called her in the middle of the night with blood down his shirt and she came to find him. It’s been too late to leave for years.

“Scully—” Mulder pauses.

She waits.

“That was the third time I’ve aimed my gun at you.”

“I wasn’t keeping track,” she replies. A lie. “How’s this lighting for you? Is this better?”

“Scully.”

“No. I’m not going to do this right now.”

“Do what?” he pleads.

“Make this about your guilt. We’ve both aimed our weapons at each other. God, Mulder.” She gestures at his shoulder. “I shot you.”

She shot him is the tamest way to put it. She shot him so he wouldn’t spend his life in jail. She drugged him and drove him across the country, slept in rest stop parking lots at dawn, wet an old washcloth with the melting ice water from the bottom of her cooler and draped it across his forehead. She never talks about that part. She understands that they are each tallying up the wrong score, that when they look at themselves they see the ways they hurt each other as more legitimate than the ways they heal. In their pact to trust each other they count only the breaches of contract.

It’s been scaring her lately to think of what legacy she might leave with him. To think he could get it so wrong. It makes her furious.

“You want me to tell you I think you were reckless and stupid?” she continues. “I do! You put a hole in your head. But we both know that’s not what you feel bad about.”

Thunder rumbles muted above their heads.

“I had to know,” Mulder insists.

“You could have killed yourself, Mulder.” She’s angry now, properly. Her ribs feel like they’re trying to break out of her body. “Do I mean that little to you?”

His lips part, like one of his fish.

“I need you,” Scully sniffs. Her voice is very small.

Mulder reaches out and touches her shin with just his fingertips. She shudders.

“I’m here,” he says.

“Then listen to me.” She takes a breath, steadies herself. “Stop punishing yourself like it’ll make me better. I never asked for your penance.”

“You don’t ask for anything.” He sounds almost bewildered.

“I do,” she says bitterly. She thinks, You just haven’t noticed.

She can’t believe she thought it was him showing up at her door on a Friday night with a bottle of wine. Desire makes her foolish; it has since she was a girl.

At this point—because their lives are a divine joke—they’re rudely interrupted. In the low light Scully tastes the warm blood on her upper lip before Mulder can see it. A nosebleed. Fuck. Now? She cups her palm beneath her nose and lunges for the sink, leaning over it, knuckles white around the counter.

“Oh, Scully,” Mulder sighs. He stands.

“I’m okay. It’s not that bad.”

It’s really not, considering. She pinches the bridge of her nose and takes stock of her body. There’s a dim ache in her head, a low throbbing just between her eyes. Her neck is stiff. Her limbs are sore; her ankles will probably be bruised tomorrow from sitting on the tile, even with socks on. She bruises so easily now, her soft, bad-apple skin. She’ll need a full night of sleep tonight. She should eat something that doesn’t come from a vending machine, but that might be pushing it.

Mulder reaches for the toilet paper, and she holds up her hand to stop him.

“Give it a minute,” she says. Over time she’s learned it’s easier to just bend over the sink or the toilet and wait it out until it slows down. Her blood stains the ceramic basin food-coloring red.

Mulder hovers at her shoulder, so charged with anxious energy she can almost hear him worrying. She’s his little watched pot; it’s like he thinks if he stays close, she can never boil over.

“Mulder, I’m in here to take care of you,” Scully sighs, and even though she doesn’t mean it as anything close to a joke, she finds it suddenly funny. What a pair. She laughs a weak, wet laugh and wipes a tear from her eye.

He chuckles. “We can take turns.”

Without looking up at him, she orders, “Sit down, Mulder.”

He sits on the closed toilet, nervous hands clasped between his spread-wide knees.

After a while her nose stops bleeding. Scully accepts one wad of toilet paper from Mulder to wipe down the sink and a few squares to bunch in her hand, just in case. As she’s washing up she notices the way her palm, the one she held up to him earlier, is smudged at its center with dried blood. She thinks of Stevenson’s Black Spot, of Shirley Jackson’s, and wonders if Mulder is getting the picture yet: Dana Scully, marked for death.

What she does not think of is the stigmata. She hasn’t had much time lately for resurrection.

She sits back down on the floor, this time taking the towel at Mulder’s feet, and leans against the wall—looking up at him now, as usual. The right half of his face glows night-light pink; the left is dark. She stares into the chiaroscuro contours of his silhouette and knows that for better or for worse he’ll get the last of her. He can’t die when she does; he can’t. She fiddles with the toilet paper in her hand.

“You know I don’t blame you for this,” she says quietly. Her mouth tastes like iron. “You’re disrespecting me if you blame yourself.”

Mulder shakes his head. “Scully, you’ve given me four years of your life.” His voice catches on something he doesn’t say. “After everything you’ve done for me, for Samantha—you deserve the truth as much as I do.”

No. He did this in her name? “Mulder.”

He leans forward, elbows on his knees. “You should know her, Scully. You should’ve known her.”

She, leaning forward too, clasps her hands too hard around his palms. “I know you,” she says fiercely.

Mulder, at a loss, shuts his eyes and sobs without tears. His chin drops toward his chest, shoulders heaving.

Scully shifts on the towel so she’s on her knees, pushing herself up to meet him. She puts a finger underneath his chin and guides his face up to look into hers. His eyes are dry when he opens them, but his breathing is ragged.

This desperate, passionate thing between them scares her. She swallows the bitter taste on her tongue.

“Hey, look at me,” she urges. “Just breathe, okay?”

He breathes. She cups his cheek.

“I do not accept answers like that,” she insists. This, too, is an order. He nods, dazed.

She sees him kneeling before sun-faded photos of a smiling little sister and two cold New England parents. He was raised to be sacrificed to a cause and he’s been trying ever since.

Thunder rolls in the distance. Scully puts her hands on Mulder’s knees. Her head throbs.

“Tell me something about Samantha I don’t know,” she says. She sits back on her heels.

Mulder pauses and takes another uneven breath. He smiles gingerly. “She loved doing cartwheels,” he says. “She was always crashing into the couch when it was too cold for her to do them outside. There just wasn’t room. She always thought this time there would be enough room.” His eyes start to well up.

“After Sam broke her collarbone she couldn’t do cartwheels for months, so she taught me how to do them out in the yard. She was like a drill sergeant." He laughs through his nose. "It was fall, and she made me clear the leaves like a runway.”

He’s crying now. Mulder runs a hand over his mouth and sits back. He looks at Scully, ruined.

“Do you think he’s her father too?”

[rainy-day-gracie]

Old Friends 3

Spencer Reid x reader

Loads of just Spencer fluff + the team :)  enjoy!

Chapter 4 has been posted!!

Chapter 3: 

“In the past week, three bodies in downtown Las Vegas have been found. One John Doe, two identified prostitutes.” Garcia pointed to the TV. “Cause of death with all three was a single gunshot wound to the heart. But there is something else.”

“Whoa,” Morgan breathed. “Don’t see that everyday.”

“He removed their faces. Maybe punishing them for their sins?” Prentiss wondered. 

“It could be that someone close to him is or was a prostitute. Shot to the heart plus removal of the face could be personal.” I said, not totally convinced of myself. 

Hotch closed his file. “We can start building a profile on the jet. Wheels up in 20.” 

---

Spencer was oddly quiet on the jet. “You okay?” I asked him. 

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just- going back home, that’s all.” He glanced over with those coffee colored eyes, and I knew that’s not all that was bothering him. 

“Maybe if we wrap this case we can go out on the town,” Prentiss suggested hopefully. 

Morgan smirked. “I thought you hated Vegas.” Prentiss rolled her eyes. 

“If we play poker, I am crushing you all. Including you,” I pointed at Spencer. 

 “Oh, I’m sure you could beat the rest of us, but the Boy Wonder here has been on a winning streak for nearly seven years.” Rossi smirked and took a long sip of his coffee. 

Spencer sighed. “I don’t know if I’ll be able to keep that up, YFN is one of the only people that has beaten me.” The rest of the team stared at me in awe. 

“YLN, what’s your IQ?” JJ wondered aloud. 

Spencer groaned and I laughed. “Um, well... 190. Spencer and I have had this argument before.” 

“Three points shouldn’t be this big of a deal!” He exclaimed. 

We almost couldn’t stop laughing until Garcia video called. “What is it? What’s so funny?” 

“My IQ is higher than Spencer’s.” 

She gasped. “Oh my goodness, this is some kind of magical moment, but I am about to ruin it.”

“They found another body?” JJ asked expectantly.

“Yes, but this time the shots were to the heart and genitals of a downtown prostitute. Plus the removal of the face.” Garcia cringed. “Goodbye, my beloved crime fighters!” And her face disappeared from the screen. 

“Alright, Morgan, YLN, Rossi, you are at the station working on victimology. JJ, Reid, visit the latest crime scene. Prentiss and I will visit the ME to see what we can find out.” Hotch said authoritatively. “This guy doesn’t have any kind of cooling off period.” 

---

Rossi and Morgan seemed to have some kind of inside joke that I wasn’t in on. Finally I couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Okay, what’s going on? You guys keep glancing at each other and smirking, but you don’t talk to me unless it’s about the case.” 

Rossi glances over at Morgan and then looked at me. “We’re just not sure if you and good old 187 were truly just ‘old friends’ in college.”

Morgan sat down next to me at the table. “We’ve seen those small glances at each other when you think no one is watching, reassuring hand squeezes, the way he lingers on you after you look away.” 

I could feel my face turn bright red even before he stopped talking. “Umm... I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Rossi smiled. “And there’s the small fact that you dated for almost two years at MIT.” 

I gasped. “How did you know about that?”

Morgan was giggling like a little kid. “Garcia may have let it slip once.” 

I took a deep breath. “Of course she did. Well, whatever. That was almost ten years ago when we had to break up. We were nineteen.”

“Yeah, right,” Rossi said. “And lets just pretend that he wouldn’t move mountains for you.” 

I didn’t have an answer for that.

---

It wasn’t up until six victims that we had an idea. 

“YLN, all of the female victims look like you,” Hotch began hesitantly. “If you released a statement, denouncing his kills, he would have to come to us directly. Otherwise, I don’t think he’s coming out of the woodwork any time soon.”

“How would I denounce his kills?”

“We would hold a press conference. You would say that the FBI wouldn’t be working on this case anymore. That the kills weren’t sophisticated enough, and the shootings were unrelated to each other,” Hotch explained. “Being insulted by someone he sees as lowly, beneath him, it would get under his skin. He would have to come to us.” 

It took all of three seconds for me to agree. “Sure, someone will have to coach me first.”

JJ stepped up. “I’ve got that covered.” 

An hour later, dozens of reporters were standing outside Vegas police station. All waiting for me. 

“Remember to hold yourself like a queen. Control the crowd, don’t let them control you. And keep your answers short and to the point.” JJ explained quickly. “You’ve got this.” 

“Thanks, let’s just get this done and I can crush you guys at the casino.” I said, making JJ laugh. “Let’s do this.”

---

“Hello, thank you for coming. My name is SSA YFN YLN, and I’m here with the FBI’s Behavioral Analysis Unit. I would like to alert the public that the shootings around the city of Las Vegas will no longer be considered a BAU case.” I made sure to keep my chin high, and speak clearly. Like a queen, JJ had said. 

“Why isn’t the FBI investigating the shootings of the city’s prostitutes?” One reporter called out. 

“We believe the shootings, while savage, are unrelated to one another.” 

“What do you have to say to the families of the victims?” 

Oh god. I didn’t know how to answer that one. I’m sorry? Feel better soon? I looked out into the crowd for something that could help me.  

Spencer was standing at the back. He nodded encouragingly, giving me a small smile. 

“The Las Vegas police department is doing everything they can to find the individuals responsible for the shootings in the city. The FBI simply believes that the case doesn’t... have the sophisticated nature needed to be a BAU case.”

“What can you say about the rumor of the removal of the faces of the victims?” 

“The Las Vegas police department is not commenting on that rumor at this time. Thank you very much.” And with that, my first press conference was ended. 

The team met me inside the building. The smiles on their faces said I did a good job. Even Hotch had a pleased twinkle in his eye. 

“You looked like you had done that a thousand times.”

“Commanded those reporters like a boss.” 

“I’m so proud of you.” 

Spencer barely whispered that last part, so quiet no one else could hear him. 

“I wanna talk to the bitch that insulted me on TV!” 

---

The man held a prostitute in his arm, a revolver pressing into her temple. 

I tried to run out so he could see me, but Spencer held me back by my waist and pushed me into a side room with him. 

“What are you doing? He wants to talk to me!” I yelled. 

    Spencer shook his head. “The second he sees you, he’s going to shoot you, no matter who’s surrounding him. Stay here and-“ 

“If I don’t see that bitch soon, this whore is dead!”

“Spencer,” I pleaded. 

He paused for a second, just looking at me. “Fine,” he breathed. He did not like this at all. 

I walked slowly out of the room and into the man’s line of sight. His eyes widened and he smiled maniacally. 

“You really think my kills aren’t sophisticated?” He hissed at me. Based on the fact that he waltzed into the police department with a hostage, he wasn’t planning on getting out of here. But he’s going to make sure he caused as much damage as he could. 

I kept my voice from trembling. “I don’t think anyone who cuts people’s faces off is anything more than a murderer.” 

“YLN,” Hotch warned from behind me. 

I didn’t dare take my eyes off of the man in front of me. “But your kills are ones that the BAU will study for years to come.” I gestured around the room. “Look at this. Right now you’ve got dozens of trained law enforcement pointing guns at you. Why would you not want to enjoy that spectacle while you’re still alive? If you shoot her, you get killed. But if you put that gun down, you can live to truly see the mass panic you created in one of the largest cities in the country.” I shrugged nonchalantly. “Your choice.” 

He considered it for a second and slowly let go of the woman he was holding. The man then dropped his gun on the ground, and got on his knees. 

I felt as if I could breathe again. I shut my eyes as Hotch put the man in handcuffs and dragged him away. 

“You are on some kind of roll, YLN.” Morgan patted me on the shoulder. “Spencer is a lucky boy.”

“Oh shush.” I groaned at him. “I need a drink. Can we hit the town now?” 

Prentiss walked up next to me. “I thought you’d never ask.” 

---

We took off the next morning, most everyone in varying degrees of a hangover. Prentiss and Morgan were the worst of it. “Ugh, I hate Vegas,” I heard her groan.

Spencer took his seat next to me on the jet. “I’m still convinced you were cheating last night. You couldn’t have beaten me that many times, right?” 

I laughed loudly. “I’ve beaten you in poker since college. What were you expecting?” 

He gave me a fake glare and rested his head on my shoulder. “Whatever, I’m taking a nap.” 

Good thing everyone was too hungover to see the obvious blush on my face. 

A few hours later, Spencer’s head was still on my shoulder. “Hey, Spencer?” I whispered. 

“Yes?” 

“What’s been bothering you?”

His dark eyes opened and he lifted his head. “Well... nothing’s been really bothering me. It’s just... strange to be seeing you everyday again.” He looked me in the eyes. “Is that weird?” 

“No, it’s not weird. The last time I saw you... you were off to join the academy and I...” I was taking a gap year to care for my negligent mother dying of breast cancer. 

“I know. And I know that’s why we... ended it,” Spencer sighed. “I just didn’t realize how much I’ve missed seeing you all the time until you joined the team.”

I gave him a small smile. “I’ve missed seeing you all the time too, Spencer.”

[xxisxxisxxis]

AU: Gateway Drug | "Forty-Something" [PT. 1]

[Pt. 2 HERE]

**This was not my idea, the credit goes fully to an anon that suggested it!!

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1988

"Shh!" I try not to laugh at Izzy as he nearly trips coming around the corner, bracing himself against the wall as I'm tucked under his arm to help him keep his balance. 

"When the hell did this get here?" He asks in reference to the wall, fumbling for his key when we get to his room. 

"You gotta slow down some, Izzy." I tell him softly as he struggles to get the door open but he eventually does. 

"I know, I know, I hear Axl bitch at me about it constantly, trust me I know." He rolls his eyes, careful not to drop his cigarette as he reaches for a lighter. 

He can't steady his thumb enough to light it, though, and I sigh and snatch the lighter from him, lighting the cigarette before he can complain. 

"Thanks." He falls back on the bed, chuckling a little as I stand at the foot of the bed, my arms crossed. "Don't take this the wrong way but you look hot even when you're knocked up." 

"And you're high." I roll my eyes. "And drunk." I add. "And I'm leaving you to it because I'm tired." 

I go to leave but he sits up. 

"You can crash here." He offers and I raise my brows. 

"Izzy, if this is a part of some grand scheme to be the next in line to have sex with me--"

"--You're pregnant. I don't fuck pregnant chicks." He wrinkles his nose, laying back down. 

"Gee, thanks." I mumble, crawling onto the bed and laying on my back beside him. 

In a moment of quiet I glance over at him smiling smugly. 

"What?" He questions, taking notice. 

"You love me so much you don't even know how to handle it." I tell him. 

"Like hell I do." He denies it in a sharp scoff. 

"You don't want me to leave you."

"That doesn't mean anything." 

"We're friends." I say next. 

"No, we're not." 

"You love me." 

"Whatever helps you sleep at night." 

I keep my smile for a few more moments, before I close my eyes. 

I feel him scoot the tiniest bit closer to me before settling down, too.

"Psst," he says in a few minutes and I open an eye and look at him. 

"What is it?" 

"You wanna get married?" 

I furrow my brows and turn to face him fully. 

"How the hell do you go from denying we're even friends to wanting to marry me?" 

"I'm high and drunk, like you said." He admits and I sigh, shaking my head a little as he clears his throat. "You and Nikki are getting divorced, you and Duff aren't together, either...everybody I know is getting hitched. I'm left out." He shrugs. 

"Be thanking God." I tell him and he chuckles. 

"Oh, c'mon. It wouldn't be that bad." He argues. "It would work out because Duff's in the band so he'd get to see the baby all the time so you wouldn't have to worry much with working in visiting and stuff. My mom would fucking love you, your dad already likes me...we've already seen each other naked so we know what to expect." He adds.

I hit his arm and glare at him. 

"Well, we're together a lot so we know each other's habits and stuff...I think it could work." 

"You're high. And drunk." I reiterate, getting back on my back. "And full of shit." 

"Okay, what about that old pact that desperate lonely people make? Like, 'if we're forty something and neither of us are married, we'll get married to each other'?" 

Knowing that by the time we're in our forties we most definitely won't be single, I humor him. 

"Izzy, if we even make it to forty-something, and you're sober and have your shit together, I'll marry you." I agree. 

"Deal," he holds his hand out for me to shake, and I do.

"Now go to sleep." I urge, turning over to face away from him. 

"The cold sex shoulder is already starting to settle in and we aren't even together yet." He aggravates and I reach my hand back and swat at him, making him laugh. 

1989

"Izzy, stop touching it!" I bark, hitting at his hand.

"Viv, I'm good, that fucking pixie stick didn't do shit." He bites back, his fingers on his nose as I'm holding ice to it. 

"Jeffrey Dean Isbell." I snap. 

"Vivian Estine Kinston." He says right back. 

"Fine!" I shove at his nose and he winces. 

"Jesus fuck, Vivian, I said it doesnt hurt to touch it, not fucking reset the bone, damnit!" He gripes in pain. 

"Oh, no, that fucking pixie stick didn't do shit." I remind him. "And you deserved it, by the way." 

"Here we go," he grumbles, leaning his head back in the car. 

"No, I mean seriously, Izzy. Drunk or not you can't go one night without being a complete asshole to a woman? Especially if they're your friends' wife, you're supposed to have extra respect for them, jesus." 

"I'm not friends with that little squealy bitch." He declares. 

"You still respect his wife. You don't pull her dress up and then hit her when she raises hell at you for doing it." 

"I didn't hit her, I karate chopped her. There's a fucking difference." He informs. 

"Either way, you're a moron." 

"And you're a bitch." 

"I don't take anything seriously from someone who snorts so much coke he only has one nostril because the size of the hole burnt into his septum." I hiss. 

"That's perfectly fine because I never took anything you've said seriously just because." He doesn't miss a beat before he drops the ice for a moment to light a cigarette.

"You're such a jackass."

"Are we saying vows right now?" He asks in reference to our insults. 

"I said when you're sober and forty-something, although right now I don't see you making it to forty-something."

"We should probably go ahead and consummate it, then." 

"Oh, gee, how tempting, I don't know how I'd possibly ever resist such an idea." I sarcastically let out and roll my eyes. 

"Vegas is only a few hours away," he points out. 

"The loss of blood from your nasal cavity is definitely getting to you." I scoff. 

"Viv, what could possibly be so bad about marrying me?" He blows smoke put of his mouth. 

"Well, for one, when you want a girl to marry you, you don't ask her while you're strung out or on a coke binge or drunk. You don't ask her while blowing cigarette smoke in her face, and you certainly don't ask her after getting your face beat in for sexually harassing and physically assaulting your acquaintance's wife." 

"I was fucked up, and that doesn't make it alright or whatever but I really do feel like shit about it, you know."

"Then you need to call Vince as soon as you can and explain that to him and apologize to him and Sharise. Because it really embarrassed her and hurt her feelings." I tell him. 

"Then will you marry me?" 

"I'm not talking about this anymore, Izzy, drop it." 

"Fine." He doesn't argue...but I do see him glance at me from the corner of my eye, a smirk on his lips. 

1990

"Tommy, I can't just up and fly out to Toronto tomorrow because me and Duff are going up to visit his family for a few days with Monroe." I explain, putting mascara on. 

"Well, think about it alright?" 

"Tommy, I'm not thinking about it, there's no way for me to go to Seattle and Toronto at the same time." 

"Well--"

"--I'll see you guys in a couple weeks, anyway, so what's the deal?" 

"The 'deal' is that you act like you don't want anything to do with us now that you and Nikki aren't togther anymore." He accuses. 

"That's not true." 

"Anytime you come out to a show is if Sharise or Heather are out on the road, too, and you just hangout with them the whole time and avoid us." 

"Gee, Tommy, could that possibly be because you idiots wore me down so much over the course of six years that I just don't have the energy to even be around you too much even when you're sober?" 

There's silence on the other line. 

"Not trying to be an ass, Tommy, but it's the truth. I love you, but I can't make it to Toronto. I'm sorry." 

More silence. 

I just sigh and hang up, finishing my makeup before I hear a horn honking out front.

"Monroe," I peek my head into his nursery, seeing his butt up in the air, thumb in mouth, tiny snores coming from him. 

I gently shake him awake, picking him up when all else fails, heading to the car. 

As soon as I get out there, I hand Monroe to Izzy, who's behind the wheel, as I get Monroe's carseat in his car. 

Once the toddler is locked in, I get in the passenger side and let out a breath. 

"You alright?" He asks me. 

"Yeah, just...a lot...I told Tommy I didn't want to go see them because I don't have the energy to be around them now that they're sober due to how they acted for so long when Nikki and I were together." 

"So...you don't want to be around them, but you'll come be around all of us." He points out. 

"I'd rather be in a room full of messed up Guns N' Roses than sober Mötley Crüe." 

"Ouch." He mumbles. 

"So, where we going?" I ask him. 

"The courthouse." He explains. 

"For what?" 

"To get married." He answers casually. 

"Ha, ha, funny...seriously where are we going?" 

"To the courthouse to get married." He says, again. 

"Izzy. That's not funny." I state. 

"I'm glad it isn't because I'm being serious, Viv." 

"Izzy, no you're not." 

"Yeah, I am."

"Stop the car." I order and he sighs, slowing down. 

"Damnit, Viv." He says as I open the door and get out, feeling too trapped in the car. "Now, you know I've been asking you for the past two years, Viv, I'm tired of hearing, 'no'. You think I'm kidding when I ask you but I'm being serious." 

"You can't be serious, Izzy, because it literally came out of nowhere the first time you even suggested it! 'Everybody else is doing it and I'm left out' is a shitty reason to want to marry someone--and you're not even four months sober! The last time a high idiot told me he wanted to marry me, I said, 'yes,' and I was in hell for it for years! So, yes, Izzy, I apologize if I wasn't taking you seriously all the times you've asked me about it because the idea in itself is just so freaking ridiculously stupid, I thought surely you'd have more sense than to think we could!" 

"Fine!"

"Fine!"

"Good!"

"Good! We aren't even friends anyway so screw you!" He throws at me. 

"wE aReN't EvEn FrIeNdS aNyWaY sO sCrEw YoU." I mimic his voice, walking around to get Monroe, who's still sleeping, out of the back. 

"Viv, get back in the car." 

"No."

"Vivian, get back in the damn car." 

"No!" 

"Why do you have to be so fucking stubborn?!" 

"The same reason you have to be so full of shit!" 

1991

"Monroe don't run!" I chase after the three year old backstage, grabbing his sides before he can get away from me. 

"Where's daddy?" He asks me with a chuckle, fingers in his mouth, his eyes switching over people passing by. 

"I don't know, baby, but we can go find him." I suggest. 

"Yeah!" He excitedly exclaims. 

"Yeah!" I reply, laughing…

"I said 'this' much cranberry and 'this' much Vodka, man!" I hear Duff complain, followed by the splattering of liquid hitting the floor. 

I turn the corner to see Duff face to face with their manager.

"Daddy, daddy, daddy!" Monroe kicks his legs, wrestling to get down. 

"Monroe—"

Duff looks at us, this look coming to his face. 

"H-Hey, man." He walks over to us, smiling at me. "When'd you get here?" He asks me, going to kiss my check but I lean back, wincing. 

"You smell like b-o-o-z-e, Duff." I scold him as he takes our son from me. 

"Yeah, don't worry about it." He assures me easy-goingly as Monroe hugs him tightly, grinning and laughing. 

His girlfriend...more so drug buddy, Linda, walks by and he glances at her. 

"Babe, you coming?" She asks him, raising her brows. 

He looks at Monroe, then me, then her again, before frowning slightly. 

"Go, we'll be okay for a few minutes." I insist. 

"Are you sure?" He questions.

"Duff, we just got here. You don't have to spend every second with us right away. You've got stuff to do." 

He sighs, looking at me, then Monroe again. 

"C'mon, baby, daddy's gotta get back to work." I tell Monroe and he reaches for me again. 

I take him and Duff kisses his head, and mine. 

"See ya before the show." He tells us, waving bye to Monroe. "See ya in just a few minutes, Roe." He assures him as Monroe waves back. 

I sigh, Monroe looking around again. 

"When's daddy coming back?" He asks me. 

"In just a few minutes." I assure him.

He's soon looking over my shoulder, his eyes wide and bright, a wide smile on his face as he brings his finger to his lips and goes "shh." 

Before I can turn to see who he's looking at, a sharp pinch on my ass has me snapping around, ready to throw a punch, only to be met with Izzy. 

He and Monroe laugh together at my expense and I hit Izzy in the arm. 

"Tailhole." I hiss out, watching my language and he chuckles some more. 

He looks so much healthier than he used to. 

He used to be scraggly and high looking all the time...now he's filled out a little more and his skins glowing. 

Of course that also probably has to do with him finding a girl he's full blown in love with.

"Duff leave you out here?" He asks and I shrug. 

"We just got here, he's with Linda." 

Izzy wrinkles his nose the slightest. 

"Duff's to Linda like Nikki was to Vanity." He mumbles. 

"Don't I know it." I state, knowing a crackhead girlfriend/boyfriend when I see one now that I've had experience with Nikki and Vanity, and Tansy and Sparkie. "Where is she at?" I ask once we get to his dressing room and see a picture of the Aneka girl he'd been telling me about in bits and pieces the past couple months. 

"Visiting her family." He tells me as there's a small knock at the door. 

"Yeah?!" Izzy calls and the door opens. 

"There he is!" Tansy says excitedly, Monroe laughing and showing a mouthful of teeth, getting down from me and running to her. 

"Tans!" He replies to her, just as happy to see her. 

"Oh, my goodness, you have gotten so tall since I last saw you." She tells him and he puts his bicep up and she grins, squeezing him to her. "You wanna go see uncle Axl?" 

"Yes!" 

"Is that okay? Just for a little bit." Tansy asks me and I nod.

"Yeah, that's fine." I say and she picks him up. 

"Alright, c'mon." She giggles and he waves at me. 

"See you in just a little bit." I tell him, waving. 

When she shuts the door, I fall back on the couch and groan, making Izzy raise his brows. "When we first got here, all I could hear was, 'daddy, daddy, daddy!'" I refer to Monroe and Izzy takes the cheap shot. 

"Sounds like you on a good night." He says before I can finish and I glare at him, making him laugh. 

"Sorry." He shrugs. 

"Anyway...we finally get here and all he sees is his dad throw a fit because he didn't have the perfectly formulated ratio of Vodka and cranberry juice." I state and he lets out a soft breath. "And then Nikki's drinking again, and I know he's drinking again because he calls me in the middle of the night, drunk, to complain about his wife--which I told him not to marry her because he barely had time to really get to know her but nope. Nobody ever listens to Viv. And Tansy said that tweedle-Duff and tweedle-Slash wake up and start their morning with alcohol, which is comforting...I've been talking to Steven's mom a lot and she said he's been going down hill again after he tried to sober up some…"

"Yeah, I heard." He rubs the back of his neck. 

"Axl's keeping Tansy from seeing anybody, he won't even let her call to check up on Steven right now. He thinks it'll trigger her to go off the deep end and get back on smack." I add. "Everything is just a shitshow at this point." 

"Yeah…" he mumbles, before a long pause sits between us, and he finally clears his throat and sighs. "Um, I need to tell you something that I haven't told any of the guys yet, and I don't know how you'll feel but just know I've thought about it a lot and think I should do it." 

"Izzy, I don't care if you're gay." I tell him and he sighs, giving a little smile…

"This is pretty serious." He says and I furrow my brows a little. "I want outta the band, Viv." 

I feel a punch in my stomach. 

First Steven, now Izzy...this is not how this was supposed to go…

"W-What?" 

"Izzy, c'mon!" Their manager calls. "You're on soon!" 

"We'll talk about it later, alright?" He says and I'm at a loss for words.

"Izzy," 

"It'll be alright, we'll talk about it." He assures me before stepping out.

Later that night, after Axl finally got on stage and the show was barely completed, Izzy and I split a room, Monroe and I taking a bed while Izzy takes the other. 

Once Monroe is tucked into bed after passing out on the way to the hotel, I sit and wait for Izzy to get out of the shower and end up dozing next to Monroe.

I slowly blink awake when I feel fingertips tapping at my forehead, and Izzy's crouched down by the bed beside me...a little smile on his lips. 

"Hey," he chuckles. 

"Hey." I say back, blinking once more…

"It's not about the music anymore, Viv. The egos and drugs and booze and pussy--it's all coming first. I'm tired of having a show at 8:00pm and not getting onstage 'til 11:45pm, and only staying on stage until 12:30am before Axl gets breathed on the wrong way and storms off." He says softly not to wake Monroe up. "And it didn't help when my royalties were in talks of getting cut...and then when Ax is constantly coming up with lawsuits or contracts or NDA's, it's bullshit. It started out as five of us against them. Now Steven's gone, Axl's God and Slash, Matt and Duff are killing themselves. I just want out." 

"You're breaking my heart, Izzy, you know that?"  I sniffle tiredly, trying not to cry. 

"I promise I'll be okay. This isn't gonna spring me into a relapse or anything." He assures me.

"I'm sorry for all of this happening." I admit and he shakes his head. 

"Nah...it doesn't have anything to do with you. Me and the guys just have our own things going and it's just time for me to go my own way." 

I just sniffle again, wiping a stray tear, and nod. 

"And we'll still stay in touch and stuff." He adds. "You'll still see me around."

"Promise?" I ask. 

"How else are we gonna keep tabs on each other to see if we gotta go through with our plan at forty-something." He shrugs. 

"Oh, please, you'll still be with Aneka and won't even be bothered with me." I tell him and he shakes his head a little. 

"Viv, I harassed you for nearly three years to marry me--even thought I didn't even fucking like the idea of marriage. If I went through that much trouble, I'm not gonna up and leave and only talk to you every blue moon." 

I smile a little, rubbing my lips together before saying, "does this mean you're finally acknowledging that we are, indeed, friends?"

He rolls his eyes and stands back up. 

"I didn't say that." He tells me and I chuckle. "G'night, Viv." 

"Goodnight." 

[psychedellic-phase]

Fifteen (pt 5)

A/N: I had a little mental block when trying write this one! I think it worked out in the end but better is coming ! I promise. Enjoyy :)

masterlist

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4)

Word count: 3.4k

tw: none, fluff :)

Spencer didn’t dream about you. When he woke up, he was sweaty and disoriented and had no recollection of the dreams he had. He fell asleep next to the box fully clothed, his arm thrown across where you should have been. In those first few moments of morning when you aren’t quite sure where you are or who you are, he reached around for you and found nothing but emptiness. 

‘Emptiness? No that can’t be right. She was right here.’ 

Just as he thought it, the truth occurred to him. 

‘She was never here. Just the box. Wait, the box. Where is the box?’

He shot up quickly, getting a little dizzy, and frantically looked around the room. He saw that he had knocked the box over while he slept and the contents were scattered all over the floor. He groaned and went to pick everything up. His hands found all the items and he put them away carefully, not peeking. He didn’t want to ruin the surprise. When everything was put back where it belonged, he sighed and sat on his bed, staring longingly out the window. 

It was barely 6 am and the sun had risen, but he couldn’t see it behind the thick gray clouds that lined the sky. It was snowing. Not a rare thing to see in Virginia, but it was very appropriate for this day. You loved snow, wintertime, the holidays, all of it. You even tried to get him to go skiing with you a few times, which he refused to do. He is extremely clumsy in nature and would definitely hurt himself or someone else if he tried. It’s a miracle they even let him carry a gun. Besides, he’s more suited to drinking hot cocoa in the lodge by a fire. The cold is much less forgiving to him. Growing up in Vegas made him partial to the heat. Even though he had lived on the East coast for many years, he’d still complain anytime the temperature dropped below 40 and bundle up in a wool coat and scarf.  Your New England roots on the other hand, taught you to handle the cold much better. When he’d complain about being freezing, you would tell him that he had no idea what real cold was like, and when you would complain about the heat he’d return the sentiment. 

He left the box on the bed and took a shower. He needed to wash everything from the last day off.  It was therapeutic to just stand in the hot water and let it burn slightly, reminding him he could still feel. This had been so emotionally draining; he could barely remember the last time he cried so much. Today he just felt numb, barely bothering to put on more than sweatpants, but somehow mustering up enough energy to make a pot of coffee. He had a feeling he’d need the whole thing to get through the next twelve letters. Each one felt heavier in his hands than the previous did, and each cut a little deeper too. With a cup of coffee in hand, he fished around for envelope #4. 

“Spence, this next one is special. You’ll know why the second you pick it up. #4: The Book of Margery Kempe.”

He smiled and ran his hands over the book, his mother’s favorite. The spine was bent like it’d been cracked open many times, and the pages were worn and well read. He could tell it was your personal copy because of the dog-eared pages. You always did that, making him grimace every time you creased the corner of a page. 

“You could just use a bookmark, Y/N,” He’d say, earning an eye roll from you. 

“A book should look like it’s been read, that’s why I buy paperbacks and write in them! I want anyone who picks up something I’ve read to feel how much I loved it, that way they love it too.” 

That comment always made him smile, “Fine, just don’t do it to any of my books.”

“Don’t worry Dr. Reid, I only do it to my personal collection.”

The memory felt warm and inviting, but ended quickly. Instead, he grabbed the book, the letter, and his coffee and sat at the chess table he had pushed against a window. He wanted to see the snow while he read, just to feel closer to you.  

“I bought for our flight to Vegas, the trip where I met your mother for the first time. You mentioned Kempe was her favorite, and I so badly wanted to impress her. I know she’s...well she’s her. But you’re her pride and joy, Spence, I didn’t want to disappoint her. Or disappoint you for that matter. Remember when you asked? 

“I’d like you to come with me next week,” You said over an IHOP pancake breakfast. 

“To Vegas?”

You nodded, “Yeah I’d love if you came with me. You could see my hometown.”

“I’ve been to Vegas, Love.”

I know it seemed like I didn’t want to go, that isn’t the case. I did want to go. I wanted to go so bad, but I was hesitant. I was so terrified that I would mess up. I didn’t want to ruin us, we’d been doing so well. I felt like this would be a defining moment in our relationship (spoiler alert: it was) and I didn’t want to risk it going poorly. 

“Yeah on cases! And that is not the impression of Vegas I want you to have. C’mon please? It would mean the world to my mom.”

I think I choked on my pancake, “Your mom? She knows about me?”

“Of course she does, I write her letters all the time.”

“Your mom knows about us, and you want me to meet her?” 

You smiled and nodded, “Yeah Y/N, how many times do I have to say it? I want you to meet my mom.”

That’s probably when I tackled you in a hug in the middle of an IHOP. That solidified the fact that you trusted me. I knew you trusted me at work, but the fact that you were willing to show me that side of you, the side you don’t really show anyone? I can’t thank you enough for it. 

We’d been together just over six months, which to most people that seems like a long time to wait to meet the parents, especially when we were already so serious, but your situation is different. I wanted you to do it in your own time. 

My family on the other hand, you met them pretty early into us dating. My niece turned one a few months into us being together and I dragged you to Connecticut for the party. Everyone loved you, of course they did. There isn’t one thing to not love about you. Nate and my dad were definitely not thrilled that I was bringing you. Nate tries to be all Big Brother-y but it’s all an act, he’s a softie. And dad would rather I marry a rich man and be a stay at home mom. I can hear him now saying, “Y/N if your mother were here to see you thirty and unwed she would be so disappointed !” Dads. They’re the worst, but I don’t have to tell you that.”

For some reason that made him chuckle, having rough/nonexistent relationships with your fathers was just another item on the long list of things you had in common. On paper, you were a perfect match. But that was the only place. 

“But somehow, you didn’t have to wear them down, they just loved you instantly. Even Mia loved you, and she was one! You handed her toys and helped her put on her shoes. You talked to my dad about whatever he had on the History channel. It was perfect. You fit right in with us; it was like you completed us, you were the missing piece that we didn’t even know we needed. I know Mia will miss you; you were always so good with her. I think we’ll all miss you. And my dad is going to hate that I will not be married off any time soon, but he can deal with that. 

But back to your mom. To say I was nervous to meet her is probably the biggest understatement of all time. The way you love and care about her is one of the many reasons I fell in love with you. The way a guy treats his mom says a lot about how he’ll treat you, and with you it said ‘oh my god he’s perfect’. You do everything you can for her, even though it’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do. I admire that; I can only wish to be that kind and giving. 

We both took a few days off to go see her, and when we were in the airport I pulled out this book and tried to read it. 

“That’s mom’s favorite,” You said, smiling at me shyly. 

“I know.” 

The plane was delayed due to a storm. We sat waiting and waiting for a few hours, your hand on my thigh and my head on your shoulder as I desperately tried to read this book. I really did. I stumbled through about 50 pages but had retained literally nothing. I found myself rereading sentences like ten times over and trying to decode them. I felt embarrassed about it. You could read the whole thing with your morning coffee and immediately recite it forwards and backwards, and translate it into Korean and Russian flawlessly and there I was, sounding out every word. It’s not like I can’t read. I can read, I just can’t read and comprehend 1500s English very well. Science was always my strong suit.

I didn’t get much farther on the plane ride either. You, on the other hand, brought a whole library in your carry on and on that 5 hour plane ride you read two thick books, took an hour long nap, played solitaire (twice), won war against me (twice), and ate all the snacks I brought for you. And in that same time frame, I had gotten through maybe half of the book, taking very long breaks to stare out the window, talk to you, and try to sleep. 

“What part are you at?” You asked me at one point and I just kind of stared at you. 

“Uh, the uh, part where she’s going to Jerusalem?”

You chuckled, “That’s not very far.”

I shoved you playfully, “Hey! It’s confusing and hard to understand!”

You reached for the book, trying to take it from me, “Let me see.”

I moved it out of reach, “No! I need to figure it out on my own.” You smiled and let me keep trudging along. 

When you woke up from your nap your head was on my shoulder and I was running my fingers through your hair like I usually do did when you slept. 

“You don’t have to read it, Y/N,” you mumbled, your voice groggy with sleep. It’s always raspy when you first wake up. 

“I know, I just thought maybe I would impress her.”

You smiled and leaned over and kissed my cheek, “I love that, but don’t worry. I promise she’ll love you.”

Then you nuzzled into the crook of my neck and fell back asleep. I put my head on top of yours, closed the book, and allowed myself to do the same. 

When we landed, it was hot. Like, ungodly hot. No wonder you can't stand the cold. 

We first went to the hotel and I changed into more appropriate clothes for the weather. You somehow still had on slacks and a shirt, I don’t know how you didn’t sweat to death. I drove us to the sanitarium, and you were nervous, you barely even spoke. You were twiddling with your fingers and bouncing your leg, I didn’t have to use my profiling skills to figure it out. The radio was off and you stared out the window. 

“How long has it been?” I finally said. 

“Three hundred and six days.”

I just nodded, your nerves added onto mine tenfold and I thought I may faint. I got us there safely though. 

“You stay here, I’m going to see if it’s a good day. If not we’ll come tomorrow,” You said. 

I just nodded and leaned over to kiss you. It took way longer than I thought it would for you to come out and when you did you were smiling. Huge. 

“Good day?” I asked, hopping out of the car. You just nodded, still grinning ear-to-ear. You grabbed my hand and every nerve I had melted away. You always had that effect on me, even when we were just friends. No one will ever get me in the same way again. Even if they tried, I wouldn’t let them. You were it for me”

Spencer reached for the mug to take another sip and found it was already empty. He stared into the bottom of the mug where some sugar hadn’t dissolved and mulled over that last sentence.

You were it for me.

He put the mug down forcefully, knocking a few chess pieces over.

So then why wouldn’t you LET him be it for you?

“You led me to her, pulling me behind you, whispering reassurances to me the entire time. 

“Mom, this is Y/N, Y/N this is my mother.”

I came out from behind you, probably looking like a meek little mouse, “Hello.” I waved. 

“Now Spencer, you didn’t tell me she was pretty.”

You blushed and stammered, she chuckled, “It’s nice to finally meet you Y/N. I’ve heard a lot about you.” 

“Likewise,” I said, and shook her hand. It was warm and soft like yours. In fact, so much of her is in you. You don’t look the same, but your mannerisms are pretty close to identical. Her hair is lighter than yours but equally as wild. I love her, because she’s you. So many parts of you, the best parts of you. She made you, and I love you, so I love her too. 

You let us talk alone for a while and she told me about your childhood. How she called you ‘crash’ because you were always running into something. How you were always the smartest kid around and how she was so proud to be your mom. She told me about the letters you send her, much like the one I’m writing right now. You told her about all our adventures, nights crying over Emily, the film festival, Jacksonville (PG version of course); you told her all of it. Your mom had your version of our love story hidden in letters somewhere in her room. That inspired me to write my version, the version you’re reading right now. 

She told me she knew we were together before you even told her because all your letters became about me. All the case stories had me and you as the stars, everyone else falling into the background. Hearing how you talked to her about me made my insides feel all fuzzy. You told her I was intelligent, courageous, empathetic, funny, and pretty much every other positive adjective you could find. 

“I’ve never heard him talk about anyone the way he talks about you,” she told me, “He definitely cares about you.”

I smiled, “I’ve never cared about anyone as much as I care about him.”

“So you love him?” 

I was taken aback at first, and paused for a moment to think, “Yeah, I do.”

It’s a weird thing to say to your boyfriend’s mom the first time you meet her, but she’s just so easy to talk to. It’s double weird because I hadn’t even told you that I loved you yet. I was being honest, I never loved anyone the way I loved you. 

“I couldn’t ask for anything more for him.”

Then I hugged her awkwardly and you came back in. I was trying and failing to suppress the smile on my face the whole time. The three of us talked until visiting hours were over. We left her with the promise that we’d be back again tomorrow.

“I was right Y/N, she loves you!” You said as we climbed back into the rental.

“She’s pretty great,” I said and held your face in my hand, “So are you.”

Tomorrow never came. 

The next day was a bad one for her, so you took me to the neighborhood you grew up in, pointing out the sites you wanted me to see and telling me the memories you had there. You took me to get chicken fried lobster at Binion’s. You held my hand as we walked down the Las Vegas strip, pointing out the ones you’re banned from. On the last day, we ordered room service and spent all day in bed, not bothering to get dressed. I loved learning about your past. At the time I anticipated being part of your whole future; I would be in every story for the rest of your life. I hate that now I’m just another chapter of it.

On the flight home I cracked open the book again and this time I read it with newfound vigor. I had a new appreciation for it after talking to your mom. You watched me flip through it, highlighting and annotating like I was in English class. You peered over my shoulder the whole time, and don’t think I didn’t see the smirk on your face. 

“When her crying passed, she came before the Archbishop and fell down on her knees, the Archbishop saying very roughly to her, “Why do you weep so, woman?” I read aloud, looking up into your warm eyes as we descended. 

“She answering said, ‘Sir, you shall wish some day that you had wept as sorely as I,’” you finished, not even having to look at the page. 

You have wept as sorely as I, Spencer, and I do not wish this feeling on anyone. 

I closed the book and held it to my chest, staring at you and mustering up the nerve to say it.

“I love you,” I whispered, just loud enough for you to hear. 

You tried to contain your grin and scrunched up your eyebrows. You cupped your ear and pretended you couldn’t hear me, “What was that?”

I rolled my eyes, “I love you.” I said it louder, more forcefully this time. 

“I love you too,” you said, no hesitation. 

I turned my head up to catch your lips and seal the whole weekend with a kiss. 

It’s kind of funny how I confessed my love for you up in the sky, among the clouds, somewhere over Virginia. It’s funny because I was on cloud nine, almost literally. It felt so good to finally say it. We were in love, arguably the most magical thing in the world. There is no one I would rather have experienced that with than you, Spence. And no one I will ever experience it with again. 

Your mother and I write to each other sometimes. Like remember when she went to the Grand Canyon? She may have sent you the Grand Canyon, but she sent me a turquoise necklace, which I will be keeping. She wrote to me once in the last few weeks since we broke up. I can’t answer. I can’t send her any more letters, it doesn’t feel right; it’s no longer my place. 

So next time you visit her, show her this. I hope she doesn’t mind that I wrote in parts of it, maybe someday I’ll be able to find it in myself to write to her again and she can tell me what I missed or got wrong. Give her a hug for me Spence, and tell her I’m sorry, I wish I could come in person to tell her, but I can’t. Tell her I already miss her. I know how happy she was for us, how excited she was about... well everything. How excited we all were. Tell her I’m sorry that I couldn’t do it. Thank her for making you who you are, the most amazing man alive. Tell her it’s been a privilege, because it has been. I mean that.”

Spencer cracked open the book and admired your dog-eared pages and highlighted bits, reading your annotations and rough translations of old English to modern English. He sighed and slid his fingers down the pages. His chest tightened as if he should cry, but no tears could fall anymore. Instead, he stood up and put the book on a shelf, where one day he’d read it again to remember that weekend. To remember you. He walked slowly back to the kitchen, filled his mug again and went to find the box.

(part 6)

tags! (if you would like to be added just let me know!): @l0ve-0f-my-life @aperrywilliams @helloniallslovelies @random-ravings @ajwantsapancake @boiled-onionrings @andiebeaword @frnks-stuff  

[thealternateuniverse]

CANDY

WORD COUNT: 3000+

Please let me know if you wanted to be tagged 😊

Summary: Where Colson meets the girl in a strip club and kept thinking of her the whole time. 

"AAAAAAY!! COME HERE BABY!"

Vegas has the best strip clubs. Dang the girls here are hot. Like with this one and Colson has been staring at her while she perform. He couldn't take his eyes off her.

"What's your name baby?"

Aww what a vixen. She stood out among all the strippers here, and she's the star stripper for tonight.

"Candy."  That's her stripper name but he wanted to know her real name. "Well I'm curious how sweet you taste Candy, wanna have fun tonight?" Candy leaned down in front of him, both hands on his lap.

"Oh? But aren't you a community dick?" His friends 'oohed' by Candy's remark. He felt himself blush too because he was never sacked like what this girl did.

"Sorry Mr. Hotshot, got better dicks to pull." The woman blew him a flying kiss and a wink leaving him agape.

"Yo! What the fuck! Kells you alright?" Slim slapped his shoulders then the gang started laughing again.

That was so mean, shouldn't be strippers throwing their selves to the famous? Then what the hell was that?

Shaking his head and shrug off what happened, Kells looked around to see if there's someone who can give him a lap dance or something to forget that Candy girl.

But he couldn't, so he brought a girl in their hotel and fuck her senseless thinking she is Candy.

---------

The gang just got back to L.A when Colson recieved a call saying he's been invited to Paris fashion week. Even though he barely rested he flew to Paris for the said event, heck he still have hangover.

Some of the guests are A-list celebrities and he feels a bit out of place he thank gods when Douglas is also here too.

"Dude, this is overwhelming." Douglas is pacing back and forth in their dressing room while he's pulling up his tight leather pants.

"Yeah, to think you have to wear this expensive clothing."

Kells is still trying to zip up his pants and when he did he groaned because his bulge is too obvious, for sure everyone in the net will be feasting his package later when their photos will come out.

"Can we fast forward and go to the after party already?"

Kells grinned. "Hell yeah." Kells loves party and he will party hard later and weed of course, he haven't smoked a blunt since he got here.

Douglas and him went to the event running late, they were mob by paparazzis before peacefully entering the venue.

"Now showtime."

They were seated not too far from T-stage and can clearly see the models. Kells started get bored so he scrolled in instagram looking from time to time to the show.

He almost drop his phone when he saw a familiar looking woman walking down the runway.

He even blink his eyes to check of he is not hallucinating.

"Holy Shit. I didn't take any drugs or weed am I?" His mouth in agape while his sight followed a certain someone walking in the damn catwalk. It's Candy.

The stripper from Vegas, the only difference is this one is a brunette Candy was blonde.

Impossible. He shook his head, maybe he was just hallucinating or hangover. Damn that woman, can't get off his mind, he needs a fuck later.

Suddenly he is interested in the show. He waited until the final walk and all models are on stage.

His gaze landed on Candy, and never look anywhere.

"I see you are already interested at someone." Douglas nudged him but his sight never left Candy.

"That's Nicole Mckagan." He look at Douglas this time, brows furrowing.

"She's related to Duff Mckagan?"

She is related to Duff Mckagan, indeed she is.

"Yep. She's the third daughter, she's his wife's niece but the couple adopted her."  No wonder this one has the Susan Holmes edge.

But he could be wrong, this couldn't be her. She is known in the industry and why would she be a stripper?

----

The show was a blast and everyone hugged together backstage after the show. Nicole was overwhelmed by the success and also being part of it.

This was one of her dream, to walk in Paris fashion show though runways aren't new to her anymore. She only wish Mae was with her but her sister is also somewhere doing a show, they are kicking ass in fashion and their parents couldn't be more proud.

"What are we waiting for? Let's get the party started!"

Everyone changed to their after party outfits, Nicole changed into her body con dress pairing it with a high thigh boots and a faux fur.

It was all flashing of lights and shouts from paparazzis when they one by one left the venue. Famous models were mobbed by pops and some A-list celebs.

"Biiiiitchh!"

She turned when she heard that familiar voice. It's none other than her sister/cousin Grace. The eldest among them.

"Grace." Grace Mckagan ran to her and embraced her in a bear hug. Because of her heels Grace looked even smaller. They are all gracefully tall but Grace is the shortest of the three. "Can't believe you flew to Paris." She kisses her sister's cheek.

"Well mom and dad went to NYC for Mae so I came to Paris for you."

Their parents are supportive and never misses when it comes to their big shows so someone must come to watch.

"I love you, now why don't you come to the after party with me?"

They went to Nicole's car waiting. "Yes please. You're killing that faux fur though."

They both giggled. The two catch up while in the car. Grace had been busy with her gigs, she's the only one who pursued music in the family. Mae is good with music too but it is not just her path of career.

Even though they aren't her real parents she is thankful for them for bringing her into their life. She couldn't remember her real parents, because they died in a car crash when she was just a baby and the Mckagans adopted her. Her mom now (Susan) was her aunt biologically but since they adopted her she considers her as her real mom same with Duff.

They arrived at the party and everyone turned their direction to them. They are quiet known but not that famous so its no surprise when there are head turning sometimes.

"Oh my gosh Graceyy!" Taylor, Nicole's friend ran to Grace to hug her.

"Tay!" Taylor is a Victoria Secret Angel and a humble person who really worked their way to the top.

"What's up Tay, nice show by the way." Grace kissed Taylor,  Taylor rolled her eyes. "Well yeah but RIP to my feet. These heels are killing me. C'mon girls let's enjoy the part."

The place is crowded but not in a suffocating way.

"You go girls I'll just go to the washroom."

Taylor and Grace went to their fun while she went to the long line of bathroom.

She is rummaging through her purse when she bump into someone really tall.

"I'm sorry I wasn't look---"

"It's alright Candy."

She stopped in her tracks and look up to see the person she bumped with.

Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped.

"Fancy seeing you here eh?"

He knew her. He recognized her. The person she avoided to see ever again.

"Come on forgot me already?"

A smirk formed in his lips. She dreaded this day that they will meet each other again after that stupid dare in sin city.

They were having fun that time in Vegas, she lost in a game and stripping was one of the consequences it was just unfortunate that she encountered Machine Gun Kelly and they meet again today and for sure he already found out who she is. She will be in doom.

"I'm----I--I----fuck damn it."  

Nicole pulled him out of that place and they went somewhere less crowded. She lets go of his hand and face him.

"O-okay first, forget that it happened and I wasn't the person you  met that time. It was------ god just forget it."

Kells smiled. He don't know but he find the situation amusing.

He just wanted to know her and fuck her but Nicole Mckagan is something else. Why was she in that strip club by the way?

"Well Candy---"

"And don't call me that." Nicole cut him off. He grins.

"Okay but Candy, you know I'm not the type of person who forgets easily. Especially when they blackballed me."

Candy--Nicole's jaw dropped again for the second time.

"Please just forget it and---and don't tell anyone."

He isn't like that but he could use it as an advantage in the situation.

"Okay."

Nicole's eyes lit up. "But one date."

She look at him unbelievably.

"I'm sorry what?"

Kells is grinning at her again.

"One date. Tomorrow before I leave Paris."

Even if this fashion week will be over, she doesn't know whe he will be over, at some point they will meet or bump each other again in L.A.

So for the sake of her dignity.....

"Fine, one date. Tomorrow."

Kells gave her a triumphant smile.

"I'll pick you up at 10. Enjoy your night Candy."

He leaned to give her a peck almost kissing her on the lips.

What did herself got into?

----------------

Nicole woke up at 9:30 with a slight hangover. She didn't drink much last night because her thoughts were running about MGK and their date. Which is today. God why did she agreed when she saw how he was with the girls last night.

"Jesus its 9 go back to sleep Nics."

Grace said in groggy voice. She was the one who had really fun last night.

"God. I hate you, now I have to deal with him because of that stupid dare."

She got off from their bed and went to the bathroom. She took a bath and brush her teeth and Grace went inside while she is doing her make up.

"Oh my god. Nicky! It's destiny!" Grace gush while leaning on the door frame.

"It's a nightmare. It was embarrassing...." It was really embarrassing. They met in an odd circumstances if things were different...what? He won't even noticed me Nicole thought, but she shrugs it off.

"It's okay to date Nics after that dick ex of yours."

That's one of the reasons why they were in Vegas. To have fun after her break up.

She changed into one of her turtle necks, a pair of high waist jean and a pair of high heeled boots.

Nicole is doing her hair when there's a knock on their hotel door.

It must be him. She suddenly felt nervous. Relax it's just a fucking date. She convinced herself. Grace open the door for her her sister hasn't even fix herself.

"Oh, I do really believe in destiny." Meanwhile Kells was furrowing her brows when someone opened the door for him instead of Cand--- Nicole.

"Go back to bed Gracey. I'll be back later bye."

She kissed the other girl's cheek before closing the hotel room's door that makes the two of them in the hallway.

"Uh sorry about my sister. She's just hangover."

He checked her out first before responsing. The girl is simple yet elegant and Colson can't help but smile. "No it's okay. Come on."

He made sure not to drink too much last night so he that he isn't hangover for their date. He also have his polaroid camera with him, just to take photos and remember this day in Paris with her.

They had their brunch in a French restaurant near the hotel and to be honest she had no idea where he is taking her.

The two talked about what they did last night, all about the fashion week while listening intently to each other.

"I really thought you were a stripper. Turns out your a model, imagine my shock when I saw you walked on that runway.But if you are a stripper I don't mind its much better." Nicole giggled at Colson. He is a funny guy and a dork. And she didn't label her as Duff Mckagan's daughter, back in high school she was just befriended because she is the daughter of Guns n Roses bassist.

"Well Mr. MGK I believe women should be mysterious."

Colson cringed when she called him MGK. "Dude, call me Colson or kells. And yeah I like mysterious ones especially when they left you blackballed." Nicole blushed, she never thought that he finds her sexy.

"Why are you so after me."

She asked. She's just curious why someone like him (who have girls throwing themselves at him) is interested to an average model like her? Well he's famous, he is good looking and sexy. He is funny too.

"Why not? I like you." He answered in a casual way. Another blush crept to Nicole's cheeks.

"Well...whatever Colson."

She can't help but grin. After their brunch he brought her to Seine taking a boat cruise and having a view of Eiffel tower.

After the cruise they went biking around the Eiffel. They laugh the whole time because they are too tall for the bike especially Colson.

"Yeah, run along chicken legs." She stuck her tongue out at him. Colson is behind her trying to fit himself in the goddamn bike.

"Hey Candy look!" She stop to look back at him. He's holding a polaroid and looks like he's taking a photo of her.

"Hey! I wasn't prepared!" She protested, probably he took the shot where she looked like she is lost in Paris.

"Nice try Candy! Hahahaha." And she was right. Her mouth was open and her brows are furrowed, looking like a lost tourist.

"God I hate you."

Colson keep taking candid shots when she isn't looking. Nicole cursed out, why didn't she brought her camera?

She could take a lot of pictures here, the view is just aesthetic.

"Why don't we do something crazy and stupid?" Colson suggested. That's the last thing she wanted to do. The last time she did it in Vegas it led up to her meeting him.

"Like what?"

And seems like the heaven is listening to him when the rain pours.

"Oh my god!" She held his arm and they both started to run.

"Wait!" Colson halted causing her to stop running to.

"We're wet already why don't we just have fun?"

Nicole look at him like he is crazy but fuck it. They are wet already might as well enjoy the rain.

The two of them soaked in the cold rain of Paris, dancing and playing like children. Nicole never felt this childlike again. Passersby are looking at them like they gone crazy, but this is fun especially when you have someone fun too.

Nicole won't forget this very moment, under the rain with a guy in a leather trench coat, leather pants and a boots.

----------

It was dusk already and they are already dry. The two of them watching the sunset.

"You're fun for a rapper you know."

"And you're fun to be a stripper." Nicole threw her the nerds they are eating.

"Well today was epic. Thank you though." Colson's gaze landed on hers and smiled.

"Nah, I should thank you. Not gonna regret saying yes to the date."

It was her turn to smile at him.

"Why were you at that strip club though?" Her smile twitched and she looks back to the sun setting.

"It was just a stupid dare of my friends. I lost a bet and then I became a stripper with a name of Candy." The dare was just to dance. She was just being reckless to entertain him during that time.

"Oh, well you nailed it." She is flattered by his compliment.

"You're really nice Nicole Mckagan and I'm looking forward to knowing you more."

Her heart raced, she stare into his blue orbs and captivated by its color. She never thought he could be this beautiful and captivating. His eyes never left hers when he lean forward, forehead to forehead and nose touching.

Nicole licked her lips and Colson's eyes landed on itss lusciousness.

She closed her eyes when he moved closer and closer but interrupted when his phone rings.

Colson muttered a curse before leaning away amd answered the phone.

"Sorry about that, its my manager. It's our flight."

Nicole nodded. Of course, he is going back to L.A. She don't know but she is saddened by the thought.

"Well I should bring you back to your hotel though." She nodded again. They made their way back to her hotel but her mind is still stuck of what happened. Were they going to kiss?

If they weren't interrupted maybe? God what was she thinking. You couldn't like a person you just met right? Plus she doesn't even know if he is serious. He said he likes her, he didn't specify if as a friend or what. Maybe she was just his distraction while he's here or he is just bored and took advantage of the situation.

"So I guess this is you." She was deep in her thoughts she didn't realize they are already in her hotel room.

"Thank you, for today."

Colson smiled and went to hug her.

"And for keeping our little secret." He giggled while she blush. "I believe in the saying, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas."

And today, what happens in Paris stays in Paris.

"Nice to meet you Nicole. See you when I see you."

Nicole smiled. She's a bit sad but she know that they will meet again someday.

"Thank you Colson. Bye have a safe flight." She was hesitant to do this but anyway she tiptoed and gave him a peck on the cheek.

She didn't wait for his reaction and went inside her room leaning on the door while her heart race. She stood there for a minute before realizing she forgot something. She didn't have his number.

She opened her door again hoping he's still there but no. He already left.

With a heavy heart she laid down on her bed thinking about how this trip to Paris went.

Her phone vibrated in her pocket, a piece of paper fell from the pocket of her jeans when she fished out her phone.

Just in case you forgot Candy

+1-***-****

Nicole can't help but smile. He's cute, what a sneaky bastard.

She opened her phone and her notifications are blowing up.

She opened the one from TMZ and her eyes widened when she saw their photo from last night. When he and Colson are talking and the one where he kissed her.

Oh god. Duff Mckagan will lit her ass.

@mgkobsessed

[ultraklll]

Tony Miller as a Gun For Hire! Tagged by the lovely @envyfelled ! Ty! This was super fun! Also, I'm on mobile, so sorry for the garbo formatting! (Fun fact, tonys voice claim is laura bailey as fiona/fem!boss)

Paired With Fangs For Hire:

Boomer - "Heya buddy!" followed by excessive scratching behind the ears | "Fuckin' love this dog, can sniff out a peggie like shark sniffing out blood. Good trait to have! Awfully convenient too…" | [patpatapatptpataptap] | "Atta fuckin' boy Boomer!" When she sees him get a kill | "Who's a good boy! Who wants to kill some cultists!" | "Wanna play fetch? Rip out their necks?"

Peaches - "Good girl…" | stealth gang stealth gang | peaches: mows down peggies/tony: a baby!" | "I jus' think it's funny that when we went to the Henbane, we picked up a cougar, Addie, an actual cougar, Peaches, and joined a crew called the Cougars… Just'a thought," 

Cheeseburger - "This reminds me'a Vegas pride, saw plenty'a bears there too" | "Kinda ironic to find you in Jacob's region, all things considered," [snickers to herself] | [PATPATPATPATPATPAT] | "Get outta my pockets! These snacks are mine, not yours!" | "You remind me of those like, beware of dog signs, but the dog is always a sweetheart who'd rather play with a home invader rather than attack them," 

Paired With Other Guns For Hire:

Jess - stealth gang stealth gang stealth gang | Jess has a MASSIVE crush on Tony. Everyone can tell. Tony knows | jess: guns are fucking lame and the sniper rifle is the cowards weapon/ tony: uses a sniper rifle/ jess: actually sniper rifles are cool as fuck | "Good shot Jess!" "S-shit, um, thanks, Tony," 

Grace - sniper gang sniper gang!! | [steals a headshot Grace was lining up] "Cmon Gracie, thought you were meant to be Olympic level!" | highly competitive, do a shot whenever they get a perfect headshot to die instantly | smug top solidarity | also heavily depressed solidarity 

Adelaide - [acts like she's not sleeping with her nephew even tho Addie knows she definitely knows] | Tony is either constantly laughing or constantly face palming over the shit addie says | have gotten into an argument once bc addie said john was a top 

Nick - "What's up eye in the sky?" | [flirts over radio] [flirts over radio] [flirts over radio] [fli | Nick: speaks/Tony: god I just love the way you fucking talk | often talk about kim together | "Can we have a barbecue at your place once these fuckers are dealt with?" | [pretends not to be bitter the Deputy got to help deliver Carmina and not her]

Sharky - "Heya baby!" | [constant back and forth flirting. It's embarrassing] | any second they're both not talking is a second they're making out | Can and Will go john wick on some peggy ass if he gets hurt badly | "Do you wanna have a sleepover?" "Lemme ask my momma," | she calls him Charlie :> | loves him so so much they're just constantly talking about anything and everything | literally like A Comedic Duo. Have together for certified funnies

Hurk jr. - "Junior! This'll be just like Kyrat!" | competitions about who can shotgun a beer faster every 4 seconds | WILL tell you stories about their time in Kyrat together | Tony has punched Drubman sr in the nose before and she'll do it again | "Hey Tony? You still in contact with Ajay?" "He sends me a royal postcard every now n' then. Apparently it's boring being king, and his only solace is that his new bodyguard is cute," 

In Combat: 

Seeing an enemy - "Fucker in my sights," | "I got a bullet with your name on it… actually I don't, who the fuck has time to carve names in bullets, but you get the idea- im just gonna shoot you now" | "You're dead on arrival, shithead," 

Sneaking - "You'd think me sneaking is counter productive because I'm 6'4 and have a very loud gun, but you're the boss Dep," | "Shhhh… we're huntin' shitheads… Heard it in a game," | [shoots alarm boxes] "You ain't allowed to call your friends, you're all grounded," | *peggy triggers alarm* "Fuckin snitch!" 

Killing an enemy - "SKULLCRACKER!" | "I just don't miss!" | just fucking headshot after headshot after headshot | [sucks in breath through teeth] "God damn I'm good," | when shes not using her Wifle (wife rifle, a 45/70) she's being FUCKING EFFICIENT with her ak-ms or just blasting ribcages open with her shotgun

Reviving - "Up you get, baby," | "You ain't dying on me that easy, Dep" | "Not today Satan!" | "You gonna let some unwashed asshole kill you?" 

Hurt - "Motherfucker!" | "That's another scar I'll tattoo over," | "Thank god people find scars sexy," | "God fuck that's smarts!" 

Downed - "Dep! Give me a hand?" | "Clean up on Aisle 4 needed!" | "Don't worry about me, just bleeding out over here, no rush," 

Revived - "Drinks on me when this is over Dep," | "Thanks babe!" | "I'll kiss you when we get outta this mess," | "I owe ya!"

Driving: 

Entering a vehicle - "Lemme take over I'm a way better driver than you," | "Floor it!" | "Hang on I've got a mixtape, just hope I havent fuckin' crushed it," | [takes the opportunity to roll cigs] | *peggies roll up* "Keep her steady!" [leans out the window and headshots the peggie on their ass, causing them to crash the car, like that isnt the coolest shit you've ever seen] "Aight cool,"

Reckless Driving - "Watch the fuckin' road asshole!" | [desperately tryna grip the wheel so she can take over driving] | "STOP THE CAR! I'LL JUST FUCKING WALK!" | "Are you tryna kill us?! Fuckin' swap seats now!" | tony is the designated driver bc one she's fucking good at it and two shes also a really bad backseat driver. Just let her drive 

Changing Radio Stations - "Now don't tell Charlie I said this but some of the peggies music is actually good,"| "John's a prick but his music taste is fuckin' good," | [punches radio in when Only You comes on] "...Sorry… Force'a habit…" | "Bold and brave my ass, John looks like he needs help getting spiders out of rooms and wears fuzzy pink bathrobes," 

Idle: 

"Man, John's a freak, and yeah I mean that in the sexy way. Someone who demands so much outward control whilst being a shithead little brat likes to get trussed up like a thanksgiving turkey and stuffed like one too. Don't give me that look Dep, I'm right and we both know it," 

"That dude Jacob ate was called Miller?? God, that could've been me if I was much older and way uglier!" 

"Faith just makes me fuckin sad man. She's been manipulated and groomed into this life by fuckin Joseph- she's so goddamn young too. I'm not gonna tell you what to do Dep, but that's just my two cents,"

"Joseph's the worst kind of man- a manipulator. He tells you what you wanna hear, targets the misfortunate who have nothing left to lose, builds a fucking army out of em. The other heralds I'm ok with arresting, but Joseph's got to go,"

[Lights cig with either her fancy lighter or by striking a match on the bottom of her shoe] "Don't start smoking, Dep,  bad for your health," 

Location Specific: 

Testy Festy Aftermath - [pinches bridge of nose] "Not again…" | "Anyone got a water and like, 3 aspirin?" | "Ain't the first time I've woke up passed out in a field, won't be the last," | "Did we at least get a photo from the night? I've won the competitions here for the last 3 years in a row now, I'm not fuckin missing one cuz of these peggies," 

Falls End - "Fuckin shame to see Falls End like this, but Mary May and Jerome will take good care of her now weve got it back, they always do," | "Think we'll get free drinks for life at the Spread Eagle when this is all over? Actually, we probably won't even get free drinks for week, so for life is wishful thinking," | she enjoys playing with the singing fish on the front of the speed eagle and keeps tryna convince Mary May to let her take it for herself bc tony goddamn miller has the biggest singing fish collection in the entire county 

Seed Ranch - *loud whistle* "this place is swanky as fuuuuck… Not that big a fan of all the dead animals though…" | "IS THAT WEED ON THE TABLE? Johnny boy you fuckin' hypocrite!" | "Oh he's definitely got a secret room behind one of these bookshelves, like a home torture room? Oh my God, what if he has more than one...?" [starts frantically pulling books off shelves] | regarding his shelves with peggie memorabilia [takes baseball bat to it] | [pretends she's never been here as she frantically stuffs any of her own belongings she might've forgotten here into her bag]

Entering the Henbane - "Don't trust a goddamn thing you see here. You think you see something you're not supposed to, hit it," | [swinging at bliss induced angel/animal/faith visions] | "Can we try savin' Faith? Don't feel right killin' her, she's so young…" | "Can we go to Sharky's place? I left some stuff there that could be worth picking up,"

Hope County Jail - "Sheriff Whitehorse has always been a good man to me, Dep. Would appreciate it if he lived through this," | "I always feel like a giant whenever I come here, everyones like 5'3. Virgil, Tracey, Charles, all shortasses," | "I think it's cute they gave you a little pin! You're part of their Pride now! Or whatever the cougar equivalent is to a lions pride… do Cougars even travel in packs? Aside from when Addie used take the girls out for drinks,"

Entering the Whitetails - "Always feels like something's watchin' you in these woods. Keep your eyes peeled," | "Always felt like there's something in these woods that there ain't supposed to be…" | [Shifting from foot to foot] "Can we get a move on? Aint'a big fan of standing around waitin' to get shot by some fuckin' sniper with a bow," | [watching Jacob's video punishing Pratt] "I'll fuckin' get you outta here, Stace… you just gotta hold out a second longer," | [about all the dead bodies and 'you are meat' graffiti] "Love what Jacob's done with the place," 

The Wolfs Den - "Eli Palmer is a good fuckin man. Kind, smart, careful and ruthless against peggies. We've made a good friend here, Dep," | "Heya Wheaty! Got a few more vinyls for your collection! They're all my own though, so be careful with em," | "I don't think Tammy likes you that much Dep. I don't think she likes much of anything anymore, other than attaching jumper cables to Peggy's nipples… Oh god, my piercings hurt thinking about it," 

Joseph's Island - [hand firmly on rifle grip] | "Creepy, evil motherfucker, had him pegged right from the start. Well, not pegged. I'm not pegging Joseph. I'd rather stick my dick in a ceiling fan then go anywhere near him- I'm just gonna stop talking," | "You know what? No one else has asked it so I'm gonna- where the fuck does Joseph sleep.  In the church? In one of these houses? In the dirt somewhere? What if he hangs upside down from trees like a bat?" 

[seelaa26]

8. Start A War

“Bang, shots fired. Pain is what you desire. The pen is mightier than the sword then how did we get here, my God. Sail among liars, blame the deniers. So you want to start a war. So you want to be immortal with a loaded gun”

As we had done in the interrogation of Pete, Sara, Brass and I entered the interrogation room while the FBI agents stayed in the viewing room. As soon as we entered, Brian got mad and started talking.

-Finally! What am I doing here? You have no right bring me here when I have done nothing!

-Are you in a hurry, Mr. Reid? –Brass asked.

-In fact, yes –he nodded seriously- I have to stop by my ex-girlfriend’s house to pick up my stuff before she gets from work.

-So you didn’t break into her apartment? –He frowned like if he had no idea about what I was talking about- The door was bashed open.

-What? No! I have a key –he exhaled and tried to calm down- Just call Portia. She’s angry with me but she’ll back me up.

I opened my mouth in surprise. Brian didn’t know what had happened, which meant I had to tell him. This was going to be the first time that I had to communicate someone’s death. I looked at my colleagues and they nodded at me. With their support, I quickly thought about how to say it.

-There was a fire at the spa.

-A fire? Oh God! Is she OK?

-Unfortunately, Ms. Weismann never made it out of the mud bath.

-The mu.. you mean sh.. it can’t be!

-Mr. Reid, we’re sorry for your loss –Brian closed his eyes and put his hands in his head- We have no evidence implicating you right now, and we know it must be a shock to hear about Portia. We need your help to figure out what happened to her. You mentioned that you and Portia were no longer together. Was this a mutual decision?

-No, I broke it off with her. She.. her, her drug problem was getting in the way. Weed. She knew I couldn’t.. she knew I had a problem with it.

-Was Portia self-medicating? –Sara asked- Cancer patients are sometimes prescribed medicinal marijuana to help them cope with the side effects of treatment.

-Cancer? Well, that may have started her habit, but her cancer’s been in remission for years.

-Portia’s cancer had come back. The autopsy found mesothelioma in the lining of her heart. She didn’t have long.

-But she never told.. I didn’t know.

-Where were you last night? –I asked- Can anyone verify your location between the hours of three and four a.m.?

-I don’t think so, no. I was at home hanging with my body Jack for most of the night. But by then, Jack was gone and I was pretty much passed out. -Can your buddy Jack confirm your story?

-Well, I try not to ask the bottle too many questions. People look at me funny.

-Mr. Reid or should I call you Captain Reid? –I could see where Brass was going.

-Not anymore, I’m no longer with the Las Vegas Fire Department.

-I bet you’ve seen a lot of buildings burn and I bet you know a lot of ways to light ‘em up.

-You know something buddy? You are way the hell outta line! –Brian snapped and hit the table with his fist- I devoted my life to jumping into flames and saving people. So for you to sit there and insinuate that I may be an arsonist.. is the most offensive thing anyone has ever said to me! And Portia? You think I set Portia on fire?! I mean, I don’t know what kind of animals you people have to deal with, but that’s not me!

-Being a firefighter was obviously very important to you so it must have hurt to lose that. I think you failed a drug test..?

-Portia made pot brownies. Now, she says she didn’t dose mi intentionally but she did leave the damn things right where I would find them and she didn’t tell me what they were! And then, as if that wasn’t bad enough, happy Monday! Go pee in a cup.

-You dumped her because she dosed you.

-Tell us about this tool –Sara showed him a picture of the tool used to break in Portia’s apartment- It’s a firefighter tool, isn’t it?

-It’s called a Denver Tool. Firefighters use it for getting into and out of places.

-The drywall at the spa was ventilated with a Denver Tool.

-Well, it wasn’t mine. Anybody can buy one on the internet, even my gir.. even Portia had one. She wanted it for protection. Said it creeped her out to be alone in that place all day.

-How often did she do that? Spend hours alone at the spa? –I asked him.

-Just about every day. You know.. there were times I started to believe that place might be some sort of front for money laundering. Portia was convinced and she was keeping her own records.

I looked at the mirror, knowing Killian and his partner were behind it watching the interrogation. Brian gave them what they were looking for.

-Did anyone else know Portia was keeping financial records?

-I think she might have mentioned it to her boss which seemed like the wrong guy to talk to about it, but she trusted him. After she talked to him, she got all paranoid.

I left the room feeling satisfied. Besides clearing up my suspicions, Brian gave us a reason for Pete to start the fire and the pressure point we wanted to start dismantling “The Queen of the Hive”. Next stop? Pete Baxa’s barbershop.

***

When we got to Pete’s office, the barbershop, we saw the blinds down and the sign closed hanging on the door. Killian and I exchanged a daring look and knocked on the door despite being closed. We were willing to wait whatever it took, but luckily, Pete opened the door holding a piece of paper around his neck.

-Hi, uh, sorry. I was shaving.. cut myself –he threw the paper in the trash next to the door- What can I do for you?

-We’re looking for a tool –I said directly- Portia Weismann owned a firefighter tool. She kept it at the spa for security. Have you seen it?

-No, she had some kind of weapon at the spa? That’s totally against company policy.

-That’s all we need right now. We’ll be back.

-Uh.. looking forward to it.

After that phrase, he closed the door and disappeared. It was clear that Pete wasn’t a very smart pawn, because if were, he wouldn’t have given us his DNA. When the evidence is in a public place and in plain sight, we don’t need a warrant, so we took the paper.

Still with the DNA lab doors closed, you could hear the music Greg was playing but once I opened the doors, the sound flooded the room and Greg was lost in the song. He moved his leg like he was hitting the drum’s pedal and moved his arms like he had drumsticks.  

-Good morning to you too, Greg! –I yelled in his ear and he jumped in fright.

-What can I say? A man need his pleasures –he answered with a smile while he removing the music.

-Especially, when those pleasures include Marilyn Manson’s Holy Wood album.

Greg’s eyes lit up and his mouth fell open at what Killian said. Love at first sight.

-Greg Sanders –he introduced himself and shook hands with Killian- It’s always a pleasure meeting someone who values metal music.

-Killian Hayes.

I was surprised to see that Killian didn’t introduce himself as a Special Agent, which is normally what they should do, but with Greg he did it on a personal way. Like if he wanted to meet him beyond the profession.

-I don’t know why but I knew you two would get along –I smiled at them and handed Greg the piece of paper with Pete’s blood- I need you to compare this blood with the black hair from the bead curtain. I need it ASAP, please.

-C’mon love, I’ll buy you a cup of coffee while we wait.

-I bet you can get it for free with that charm of yours –I said as I walked out the door that Killian was holding for me.

-You don’t like it? -he put his arm around my shoulders and brought me closer to him as we walked down the hall being the center of attention of my colleagues. I looked at his blue eyes and his devilish smile and forgot about everyone and everything around us.

We left the lab and went to a cafeteria that was on the opposite street, so we were close in case we were needed. We sat at a table at the back, by the window, and ordered two coffees. He ordered an Irish coffee, which was curious but predictable.

-Feeling homesick? –he raised an eyebrow and nodded slightly- How did you become an FBI agent anyway?

-Had some connections with the IRA. One day the FBI showed up at my door, offered me a deal to be their informant, I accepted and since I helped them take down the operation I started working with them until I got my position.

-That’s.. quite impressive, actually.

-What about you?

-I thought you were Sherlock Holmes, why don’t you give it a shot? –I dared him. Killian placed both arms on the table and stared at me.

-Divorced parents clearly marked by the absence of a father, broken home and growing up with different difficulties. Short-tempered and with a certain tendency to fight–I swallowed and leaned back- I’m sorry Laura, but you’re from textbook.  

-You’re right.. –I nodded with a certain sadness- About everything.

-Hey, it’s better to come from a broken home than to live in one –the waitress brought us the coffees, interrupting that beautiful scene- So, what was your method to get the rage out?

-Boxing.

-Suits you –he smiled like he expected that answer- Keep practicing it?

-Not since I moved here.

-Why’s that?

-Well, coming to Vegas was a new chance for me and I wanted a different life than what I had in Barcelona, so I left it all behind.

-In my opinion, I think you should box again. I’m going to give you some advice, Laura. You need to find something outside of work to disconnect. Anything. Otherwise, the things you see and the people you meet, they’re going to be stucked in your head. For a girl like you, with that kind of fire inside, boxing is one of the best options.

***

Greg sent me a message confirming that the DNA matched, which meant we had a search warrant. Brass, Sara and I got in the same car and we headed to the barber shop.

-Mr. Baxa, Las Vegas Police, open up! –Brass yelled while he knocked on the door- Looks like he’s not here. We’ll have to execute the warrant without him.

The police opened up the door and Sara and I handled the scene investigation. The barber shop was small, way too small to be a normal business, so we figured that everything had to be in his office. We found an empty financial portfolio with the spa’s logo on it.

-Those records we found in the victim’s oven are just the kind you’d keep in a binder like this –Sara concluded.

-Hey Sara, look what I found –I held the bag in my hands- Vegan blueberry muffins. They look almost edible.. and flammable.

Next to the office, there was a small room with shelves, but the first thing we saw was some boots on the floor. Sara picked them up and observed the sole of the shoe. It was similar with the shoeprint the intruder had left at Portia’s apartment.

-I wonder why they need so much acetone –I said to my colleague pointing to a 5L litter of acetone- Place is a little too masculine for manicures.

-Mmm.. Laura? Guess what my favorite city is.

I turned around and looked at the tool she picked.

-Denver.

Back in the lab, it was time to get some physical evidence of Pete’s tampering with the Denver Tool, since finding it in his office wasn’t enough. We needed him on the weapon that caused the fire and killed Portia. I had the tool on the table and everything I needed to search for fingerprints, when someone entered the room. I looked back and saw him.

-Hey Nick.

-Hey, how you doing with the case? –he asked when he stood next to me.

-Good, actually I was about to examine the tool that caused the fire.

-Can I help you with something? –he nicely offered.

-Well, if you want you can examine the portfolio –I pointed to the portfolio next to him on the table- I was going to do it after finishing with the tool, but if you help me that would be great.

-Let’s get to work then! –Nick put on some gloves and I looked at him with a kind look, thinking him for helping me.

With the magnetic powders I dusted all the parts of the tool, but there was only one fingerprint on the handle. I looked at Nick with a satisfied smile while he looked back showing me the portfolio with another fingerprint. We had both been successful.

-Now, let’s photograph them and run them through AFIS.

-So, ..Where’s the Super Agent? –Nick asked like he was interested.

-I don’t know, I’m not his mom.

-Yeah, I know.. I was just asking because you’ve been spending so much time together.

-Well, yes, we’re working a case.. together.

-I’ve worked cases with FBI agents and they haven’t been holding me in the middle of the hall.

I had never seen Nick react like this; he seemed annoyed and even jealous. Before saying anything, I stopped to look at him. He kept his gaze steady, jaw clenched and darken eyes.

-Nick, what’s all this about?

-About that you two should have a professional relationship. I understand that he’s handsome and charming, but don’t let that cloud you. Especially when he’s playing with you.

-Excuse me?! –I opened my mouth and took step back- What if I like him? What do you have to do in my love life? Do I tell you who you should be or shouldn’t be with? Besides, I think it’s funny and hypocritical that you advise me to keep it professional. Like you did with Kristy?

-I guess I had that one coming.

The sound of the AFIS search separated us from the discussion to look at the result. Portia’s fingerprints were the ones in the financial portfolio, confirming she took the papers and Pete’s fingerprints were the ones on the handle of the Denver Tool, confirming he started the fire.

As fast as I could, I went to Brass’s office to get an arrest warrant for Pete. I knocked on his door and when he let me in, I realized that both officers were in the office and looking nervous.

-Guys, I think I know what happened –I explained- Baxa was laundering money and when Portia confronted him about it, he panicked. Then he decided to rig the spa to explode. Portia probably showed up after Pete was gone. Doc Robbins said she had marijuana in her system, so she might not have noticed the acetone. While she was there burning to death, Baxa was at her apartment, looking for the records she was keeping.

-Laura –Brass made a dramatic pause- We have a visitor. Ms. Beatriz Salazar.

-You serious? She’s here?

-“The Queen of the Hive” herself just walked in and asked to talk to the CSI in charge of the Pedro Baxa case.

-Do you mind if I sit in on this one, Captain Brass? –Agent Huntby asked.

-Be my guest, you can even take my seat. I’ll hang back and watch from the viewing room.

Agent Huntby and I entered the room with some intimidation and fear, we couldn’t deny it. Agent Huntby remained standing while I sat across from Beatriz. She was a woman in her 50s, she had brown hair with highlights. Her suit clothes showed a scar on her chest from an open-heart surgery and a tattoo of a crow.

-Hello, Ms. Salazar. My name is Special Agent..

-Gene Huntby. I know who you are. But she.. –she looked at me with narrowed eyes- I am unfamiliar with. I shall presume you are the one persecuting my poor, clumsy Pedrocito?

-We’re not persecuting anyone. The evidence speaks for itself, ma’am –I wasn’t going to let Beatriz intimidate me- Why are you here? Usually. When someone wants to talk to us in this room, they want to confess. So, is there something you’d like to get off your chest, Ms. Salazar?

-You think you’re very clever, don’t you? –She got mad- Perhaps I know you better than I thought, but I’m here for Pedro. He’s family.

-Family, huh? You know, I might actually be moved by that, if you weren’t still the primary suspect in the execution murder of your first husband –Agent Huntby spoke boldly.

-My husband’s murderer remains at large, Agent Huntby –she smiled at him- Pedro’s family, all three of his sisters, they live in the house I provide. So, as you can see, I have s significant investment in the future and well being of this young man.

-Sorry about your investment, but, like I said, the evidence speaks for itself and it never lies –I spoke again.

-What precisely is this evidence saying to you?

-I’m not at liberty to discuss the specifics of an ongoing investigation.

-Very well, I understand. Sometimes a man is called upon to be more than he has been in the past. Sometimes he fails.

-A woman is dead because Pete Baxa was trying to clean up a mess. Do you think it was his own or yours?

-I think if this evidence is speaking to you, miss, then something must be lost in the translation, regardless of whatever mess there was, Pedro is incapable of violence. Pedro is not a murderer.

-You’re very bold to come here. Aren’t you afraid you’ll leave some trace behind? A hair or flake of skin? Something with your DNA.. that we might be able to use against you.

She looked at me with a sideways smile and then she spat on the floor.

-Wouldn’t want to make your job more difficult than it has to be. I believe I have made myself very clear to you. I shall not waste anymore of your time. Muchas gracias.

Beatriz got up from the chair, gave me a last challenging look and left the room. A few seconds later, we all met again in the hallway. When we were about to talk about what happened, Brass got a phone call.

-Two police officers came by to serve that arrest warrant again –Brass explained as we walked into the barber shop and saw Pete dead on one of his chairs- They found him like this. Called it in.

There was a video camera aimed right at him, so we hit the play button. Pedro was sitting in front of the camera making his confession.

-My name is Pedro Baxa. I am an embezzler.. and a murderer. I set fire to the Superla Spa in order to cover up the fact that, for some time now, I have benn fraudulently reporting its earnings –he really looked sad and sorry- I poured acetone all over, I cut the gas line, and left a muffin to burn in the toaster oven. I swear to God the place was empty when I rigged it go up. I know it’s small comfort, but I apologize to her family and to anyone close to her. I’m so sorry for taking her away. Please, tell my sisters this. I made a deal with the devil to keep you safe, to give you a better life. I beg you to remember me if you are ever tempted to make a deal of your own. So it’s come to this.. Good bye.

Pete Baxa put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger.

***

-So all the forensic evidence supports what Pete Baxa confessed to on the video? –Killian asked.

-Yes, it does. But Pete Baxa’s confession wasn’t for us.

-Neither was his suicide. I think he was trying to make amends.. to his Queen.

-Well, this case may not have resolved itself the way you hoped. Now, we’ll have to find another way to trap Salazar.

-Yeah.. and maybe we’ll trap her together –Killian nodded and looked at me. Noticing we were in the middle of the hallway, he got close- Look, I’m not leaving until tomorrow and I was wondering that maybe you’d like to have dinner with me. Now that the case is officially over.

Killian’s seductive and daring gaze was a force that attracted me to him. His hand brushed mine lightly and I couldn’t help but blush. There was no reason for what I felt when I was with him. So, when I was going to say yes, Nick appeared on the scene. He and Warrick were talking and laughing and then Nick realized that I was there with Killian. His face changed.

-I can’t. I’m sorry.

-I understand love –Killian nodded and approached me to give me a hug- Maybe some other time. I’ve left something in your locker accompanied by my phone number. Call me.

After that farewell, the first thing I did was go open my locker to get my things and find what he had left. It was the business card of a boxing club in Vegas.

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

Hey there! :) This is for the OC Ask Game, for Harrison: could you answer questions 1-6, 14 &15? Hope you're doing well!

Oh let’s just expose Harrison *cracks knuckles*

1: List five basic facts about your OC.

He’s turning 22 (just shy of his birthday in Moth Work)

He’s gay as fuuuuuh

He’s from Brooklyn, NY

He’s an only child

If you come for his jacket, he’ll come for your life (a very basic fact)

2: Post a line of dialogue from your OC.

This is dialogue from book 3 that I still can’t get over (for context, Reeve is criticizing Harrison’s choice of Walmart as a gourmet pie shop back when Walmart used to be a big thing in my books lmaooo):

Reeve: “So your gourmet pie shop is Walmart?”

Harrison: “Why yes, actually… Do you have a problem with saving money and living better?” 

lmfaoooo

Also an iconic interaction from Moth Work:

Lonan: “You’re patronizing me.”

Harrison: “You’re patronizing yourself.” 

3: Post a snippet from your writing that describes your OC.

So this is the first ever description of Harrison from book 1 (I had just turned thirteen when I wrote this):

There’s a faint click somewhere to my right and a soft glow soon illuminatesthe room, shattering the darkness into pieces. I shake off the fact that Ican’t see where the light is coming from, instead pointing the still loaded gunat the first thing I see, a boy who looks a bit older than me with what I makeout to be honey blond hair and the most pissed off expression on his face. 

(fun fact I really wrestled with describing the colour of Harrison’s hair at the time and probably changed “honey blonde” from “honey brown” like 5000 times, 13-year-old me had BEEF with his hair colour)

4: Post a snippet from your writing in which another OC describes your OC.

This is a very old description I scavenged to find from book 6 where Reeve vaguely describes Harrison in the first paragraph which is one way to go about it:

Beside me is wood smoke and copper, leather and strong coffee, all strung around human flesh. He moves with precision, like a player focused on a riveting chess match…

And here’s the most recent paragraph (and the last paragraph in Lonan’s POV) of Lonan describing Harrison when they meet up for the first time after brief hiatus (I haven’t shared this yet, so for context, Suzanna is Harrison’s mother):

In the kitchen, Suzanna laughs at Eliza’s joke, something vaguely about Geminis, or maybe she says alibis. He doesn’t quite hear it. He doesn’t mean to drop the rose, but it falls with a muffled thump between them, a floral border. Lonan blinks many times. He breathes many times. He counts many times. But after all the tests—the blinking, the breathing, the counting, the person at the door doesn’t change. Sunshine hair. Concerned mouth. Semi-crooked nose. Butterfly lashes. Eyes the colour of a kingfisher.

5: Describe your OC’s physical appearance.

Harrison’s the cutest guy in town, so cute he managed to convince @sarahkelsiwrites to get me to write book one! Without Harrison’s cuteness, this 8 book series/monstrosity would not exist! As I’ve said, Harrison’s a cutie and should definitely be treated as such (the downfall of Moth Work loool). He’s shorter than Lonan by just a bit tho I really can’t think of how tall my characters are because I am apparently short and can’t imagine anyone a foot taller than me, so all you need to know is he’s tall but still shorter than Lonan lol. He looks a lot like his Portuguese mother and takes on both her “semi-crooked nose, the same mouth, straight and concerned, the same markabove the eyebrow he always thought came from some sort of accident. Eventhough her eyes are brown and his are clearish and teal, it’s like he has hereyes too—soft and rimmed with lashes like butterfly wings” according to Lonan lool. He wears Lonan’s fake mom’s earring which is a pretty dangly blue gem. Though Harrison could look like anything and all he’d need to be Harrison is his leather jacket. In the book cover I designed, Lonan’s wearing it (ROOD) as he unknowingly takes it in chapter 6, but besides that one time, his jacket never comes off! He also wears his mother’s guardian angel necklace which is a newer edition, though a well-liked one as I always pictured him wearing a chain of some sorts! It’s important to note that when I was thirteen, the only way I’d describe Harrison’s eyes were as “burning turquoise” loool.

Here’s how I drew him for the book cover (though I couldn’t really get his eyes right are they burning turquoise-y enough??):

6: Describe your OC’s love life.

Messy! Harrison’s gone through a lot as a hopeless romantic, and has been lead to much heartbreak because of it. If he loves someone, he really loves someone, and this is very much seen in his feelings toward Lonan. Since we’re spilling the tea on Harrison, here’s his relationship with Lonan throughout the books + as Nothing But Thieves songs (because we’re going THERE):

Book 2

When the boys actually meet! Lonan didn’t exist in book 1 and I think Harrison’s sanity benefitted from this but anyway

They’re coworkers (back when this book was a dystopia lmao, Harrison took an open job as a tech analyst in Lonan’s government squad which was his pride and joy and I have since of course axed it)

They don’t like each other but can’t get enough of being enemies if u know what I mean

NBT song: Last Orders 

Book 3

This “love being your enemy” thing continues even when Lonan makes his redemption arc and he’s no longer an enemy lmaoo

We get to see their actual friendship develop toward the ¾ mark of the book

“Clearly these people care about each other” kind of vibe!

NBT song: Wake Up Call

Book 4

We see a new level of closeness develop between the boys, and though we’re in Reeve’s head, she def senses some tension mwahaha

NBT song: Afterlife

Book 5

Harrison really steps in as not only a friend for Lonan in this book, but a body of support while his mental health goes through it

NBT song: Reset Me

Book 6

They’re both mad at each other for almost this entire book but this gives us more of that tension we WANT

Reeve really notices this tea develop and she be sippin it the whole book

Toward the midpoint there’s definitely explicit suggestion of their relationship (Reeve can’t fully see this as she’s mostly concerned about herself but there’s definitely an ongoing relationship in this book that’s pretty turbulent):

NBT song: You Know Me Too Well

Moth Work

This relationship sees a lot of bad times

It ain’t a healthy relationship by any means and things start falling apart! Both boys have things they have to work out, that are currently causing lots of conflict!

The TEA I have not shared yet is that I *plan* for them to split up by the end of this book (though they never were really together in this book so it’s not really a breakup lol). Harrison moves to Brooklyn with his mom and Lonan stays in Vegas with Eliza (do with that what you will!!)

NBT song: Hostage (for Harrison) and Take This Lonely Heart (for Lonan)

14: What is one of your OC’s secrets?

That he likes waffles better than he like Lonan? Scandle! Harrison had an affinity for waffles in book one. Here are receipts:

A scene from book 3 (2015) that features a lot of iconic content (Harrison’s waffle kink, Foster being prime-time soft boi, grumpy Lonan, narrated by Reeve who manages to not inject her opinion once, my classic 2015 “witty” YA dialogue):

“Ah, well… your sister [the youngest, not Reeve lol] was talking about people, and how being mean is the only way that they listen… She may or may not have had a run-in with Harrison earlier, which is why the topic was brought up…” From next to him, Ris grunts over his steaming waffles, a full mouth when he turns his face toward Lonan who’s got the same laptop in front of his face, furiously tapping at the keyboard as he concentrates. 

Harrison actually reaches over and slams the lid shut. ��          

“Hey asshole,” he says around his mouthful of waffle. “Put the fucking technology away, and be a little social.” Lonan’s dead silent on the receiving end, and when I look closer at him, I realize it’s because his fists are tightly clenched and a vein in his forehead’s bulging. 

“That was three full days of work that you might’ve completely ruined!” Lonan hisses, eyes wide and angry as he stares at Harrison who’s scowling around his breakfast. 

“Anyway…” Foster continues awkwardly. “Basically, helping people is sometimes–” He’s cut off as a giant waffle is smothered up to his face, Harrison holding it out tauntingly. “What the hell are you doing?” 

“You know you want the waffle… Waffles…”  

Also to the waitress while he and Reeve bond at a diner:

“Thank you.” Harrison says with a wide smile, staring at the waffles like they’re the love of his life. “Oh my fucking god.” He mumbles, and I assume that I’m not meant to here that. 

15: Your OC is given the chance to go back in time. Where do they go and what do they do?

I think there are a lot of things he’d like to change in his past, namely his relationship with his mother who he’s estranged from until the end of Moth Work. I think he would’ve liked to see her more in his teens (despite being a hard ass when she does show up in Moth Work). He’d go back to Brooklyn and like chill in a pizzeria with his mom lol. On a lighter note, I think he’d also like, join ABBA or something.

Thanks for asking!

[prairiesongserial]

epilogue 10

“Operator, this is Mac,” came the familiar, bored drawl of Lady’s secretary.

Mac was a heavyset butch, strawberry blond hair buzzed to the quick. He had sweat through his white shirt, especially where he had been wearing his underarm holsters, which were now slung over the back of his chair. He was an excellent secretary, and Lady didn’t just think so because he had saved her from two hours of phone calls that afternoon.

Mac leaned back in his chair, phone cord tethering him to the kitchen table as he made exasperated eye contact with Lady.

Lady raised her eyebrows archly. Mac had been complaining - mostly through facial expression - about the very, very small Hemisphere operation they had commandeered since they had arrived this morning. It was a family operation in the middle of Alabama, evident by the fact that its headquarters was a farmhouse. By the sound of the feet pounding up and down the stairs at all times, Lady counted sixteen members of the Rushforth Family Company - which was such an embarrassingly vanilla name for a crime ring, mob, or gang, that Lady was beginning to wonder if the Rushforths were actually straight. They paid Hemisphere dues, and had immediately acquiesced their home to her upon her arrival, but Lady wouldn’t have been surprised if the Rushforths merely ran a dozen successful general stores.

Lady and Mac sat at the kitchen table with the rotary phone, but across from them, Mrs. Rushforth was composing a bolognese, dicing the mirepoix inches from Mac’s makeshift workstation. It had been a long afternoon of playing catch-up. This was what Lady got for travelling. She hadn’t phoned in to Central since Oklahoma City, and a lot of people had left her a lot of messages. Mac took notes for the less important calls, but occasionally Lady had to take the phone.

Lady watched Mac take a page of notes, scribbling down shorthand with impressive speed, then hang up the receiver.

“That’s all your missed calls, except for the Dead-Eyes, who want to know - ”

“Never mind the Dead-Eyes,” Lady groaned. She pinched her forehead, looking up at Mac with an expression she hoped conveyed martyred misery. “God, what a fucking waste of a day.”

“You’re not done yet,” Mac said, utterly unyielding. Cruel, cruel woman. He stretched his arms behind his back until his shoulders popped. “Weren’t you tellin’ me…”

Lady rolled her eyes. The real reason she had commandeered the Rushforth’s kitchen table hadn’t been to listen to her messages.

“Give me the phone,” she snapped, pulling the rotary phone over. She dialed quickly and waited for the line to connect.

“I think you should sweet talk the operator,” Mac said. “It’s Ruth on duty right now. Tell her you’ll give her a raise.”

Lady shot Mac a glare, but quickly fixed her face as her call went through.

“Hi, Ruth. It’s me. Yes, you were just on the line with Mac. Yes, I know.” She paused, listening as Ruth launched into a mile-a-minute soliloquy on just how busy the switchboard had been today.  Lady cleared her throat. “So, about your hourly rate…”

This was what the head of Hemisphere had to resort to, these days. Auntie had never had to schmooze with the girls working the phones, let alone the discontented gangs under her thumb.  Back in Constantine’s day, If a gang had a problem, they either died for it or shut the hell up.

“...Now Ruth, would you mind connecting me to Marc Waters?” Lady said saccharinely.

Mac rested his chin in his hand and smiled up at her, clearly amused that this was one call Lady had elected to make personally. He was lucky he was such a good secretary. The line made a satisfying click as the call went through.

“Bonjour, bonjour!” Marc crowed over the line. Lady held the phone away from her ear. “My, if it isn’t a treat to hear from you. How’s Central lately? How’s Mac, is he around? I was so sorry I had to miss last year’s gala, but as usual business comes first - I don’t have to tell you, of course! It seems like forever since I’ve been out of Texas, and now I’ll probably have a teensy war on my hands, what with all that unpleasantness with Las Realezas. Oh, I should tell you about that, but where to begin…”

Lady stared down at the receiver for a moment.

“Marc, I called you,” Lady growled.

“Oh, and so you did! What did you want to talk about? My goodness, you wouldn’t believe the rumor I heard lately about a Vegas gang - Oh, what was their name, there are so many of them…”

“Marc,” Lady said. “I need information. Since you love a rumor so much - ”

Marc laughed, and the sound came and went as he apparently moved his receiver around. There was some scuffling over the line, and the sound of a closing door.

“Don’t mind the noise, I’m just getting in the bath,” Marc yelled distantly, and the sound of running water was all Lady could hear for several long seconds. She held the receiver away from her ear and glowered across the table. Mac refused to commiserate, his attention utterly distracted by Mrs. Rushforth’s cooking. Mrs. Rushforth had given him a spoon to lick.

Lady returned her attention to the receiver just in time for the middle of something or other about La Salle, for some godforsaken reason. This summer had been one thing after another. The Vegas gangs were breathing down her neck about their wrecked city, La Salle was toast, Whist hadn’t checked in and was probably dead, and every gang within 50 miles of the Dead-Eyes’s path of destruction wanted assurance that she was going to take care of it before Ethan came for them, next.

Watching Ethan die hadn’t solved one damn thing. She should have killed him herself. She should have scooped him up when she’d had the chance, locked him away, and then publicly executed him in the middle of the ballroom at Central headquarters’ yearly gala. Then no one would have said a damn thing about how much spine she did or didn’t have.

The only way to recoup her lost face was to ferret out the four who had beaten her to it. Cody Allison. Friday Wilmot. Valerie Lecter. And the silent travelling companion who it had been very, very difficult to get a name for, and even then, she’d only gotten “John.”

“Listen, Marc,” Lady interrupted. “I need to know more about Friday Wilmot and Valerie Lecter.”

“Who?” Marc said.

“I don’t know what the connection is, but they were at the riverbank where Ethan died,” she explained. “What do you know?”

“Ethan’s dead? Ethan Rouse?” Marc whistled. “You’re kidding! Who killed him, the rest of the Dead-Eyes? You know, they gave me a very hard time a few weeks back. They drank three barrels of my water, and in return for my hospitality, they took my men captive! And then - ”

Lady had heard this one before. Yet another Hemisphere gang seeking reparations for the Dead-Eyes.

“Marc. Friday Wilmot and Valerie Lecter. What’s the connection to Cody Allison?”

He stopped short. He was thinking before he answered. Great, that meant he was coming up with a lie.

“You know, I can’t say the name rings a bell,” Marc said with a theatrical sigh.

“Which name?” Lady said, grinding her teeth.

The phone beeped at her, and Ruth’s voice cut into the conversation.

“Lady, um, Johannes Madsen is on the line,” Ruth said. “I wouldn’t interrupt, except you said that I should put Mr. Madsen through with priority, and…”

“Marc, hold on a second,” Lady said. “Put him through, Ruth.”

A cacophony of sounds assaulted Lady’s ears. She held the phone a little ways away as the rumble of an engine, one or more shouted songs, about a dozen barking dogs, and Johannes’s own shouted voice blended into one dissonant orchestra.

“Johannes, I’m on the line,” Lady said, bracing her arm against the table and resting her head in her palm.

“My God, Lady, are you at a construction site?” cut in Marc’s voice, just as the sound of a window slamming shut on the other end of the line silenced the major part of the racket.

Ruth must have done this on purpose. Lady held the receiver away from her ear for long enough to mouth “Both of them,” to Mac.

“You should have offered maternity leave with the raise,” Mac said flatly.

Lady glared, and returned her attention to the phone.

“Lady? I got through?” came Johannes’s lyrical voice. “Those operators of yours are all business lately. Usually the Hemisphere lines are a good thirty minute wait for the likes of us. Did you put in a good word for me or something?”

“Who is that?” asked Marc before Lady had the chance to say anything. “That’s not Mac.”

“Who’s on the line?” Johannes echoed. “Well, anyway, if they’re with you, I guess it doesn’t matter. Listen, I picked up the…”

Marc started speaking at just the same time, clearly aware that Johannes was speaking, and yet also clearly unconcerned with whether either of them could be heard.

Lady held the receiver away from her ear once again, waiting for the two of them to reach some sort of harmony. It was like listening to a brass band of only trumpets. In fact, Lady was pretty sure she could hear a distant trumpet over the phone, probably on the circus end of things. Not that she would put it past Marc to pick up an annoying instrument.

“ - so Lady calls me out of the blue to ask about some so-and-sos, and I’m sure I’ve never heard those names in my life,” Marc prattled on. “And you’d think I would remember, too, meeting someone named after a day of the week, as you don’t see that every day. But honestly, as if I don’t have better things to do! She does have information brokers, doesn’t she?”

“Marc, I’m still on the line,” Lady snapped.

“Yes, dear, and there’s your answer for you,” Marc continued, just as Johannes interrupted.

“Look, I’m blowing through electricity here, and - Oh, Ezra, good timing, I’ve got Lady on the phone. Anyway, you didn’t fucking tell us that you were gonna make this a competition. How am I supposed to make nice on my delivery if every schmuck east of the Mississippi looking to make a few thousand silver is gunning for these four?” Lady heard his hand slam down on something. “God’s sake, Lady, you know I had to shoot someone? Some random bounty hunter out of New Orleans. What a waste! For all I know, he was one of your guys, and you better not make it a whole to-do.”

“Who are you, again, sweetheart?” Marc said. Lady could envision him twirling the phone cord around a finger in the tub. She squeezed her eyes closed.

“None of your business,” Johannes returned cheerfully. “Listen, we got your four troublemakers, we’re heading to Everglades City next, and that’s all I got. Except, you know, a hearty fuck you for the bounty hunters. Ezra, was there anything else?”

In the split second of precious silence while Johannes Madsen waited for his brother to give his input, Marc Waters interjected.

“Lady, is this really necessary?” Marc drawled. “I mean, you called me, remember? And here I am, made to feel like a snoop while you discuss who has and hasn’t been murdered with a gentleperson whom I can only assume to be a common vagabond! Lady, are you listening? Am I an eavesdropper at the window? I mean, far be it from me, but Miss Manners dictates…”

“Marc, shut the fuck up,” Lady said stiffly. While Marc was speaking, the cacophony had joined up on Johannes’s end again. The competing voices and whoops of laughter and the goddamn trumpet - all on top of Marc’s drawl - were making her want to pull her hair out.

“Johannes, was that all?” Lady asked. “Because if you’re finished, please hang up.”

Johannes didn’t answer. He had evidently put down the phone to engage with some circus-related problem - Lady could hear his voice from a distance, and possibly his brother’s, bickering in a language she wasn’t sure was English. Marc was still speaking, undeterred.

Lady laid the receiver down on the table. She was going for a walk. And so help her God if a member of the Rushforth Family Company so much as even glanced her way.

10.14 || 11.1

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

(via https://open.spotify.com/playlist/6iFjbhilupCy9ZMxEA9gpz?si=Mlv6BtXiS3iuXV_zg6UHdQ)

tagged by @sybil-writes​ , these are songs that remind me of Six but didn’t make the cut for her very spare six-song official playlist. they are in no particular order and i am not going to talk about all 26

Castle by Halsey is probably on every f!Courier playlist in existence

I'm headed straight for the castle

They wanna make me their queen

And there's an old man sitting on the throne

That's saying that I probably shouldn't be so mean 

Young and Menace, by Fall Out Boy

And I lived so much life, lived so much life/I think that God is gonna have to kill me twice

Heaven Can Wait, Sia- Six to the wives

The doctor just gave me the bad news/I've been living like a queen in a castle /Oh, dark spirits drivin' through me like a drive-thru

also  

You're my angel, put my heart on rewind/So, babe could you do me a favor? (A favor)/Girl, could you be my savior?     

Ballroom Blitz by Sweet has the peppy manic upbeat I look for in her songs

And the girl in the corner is everyone's woman/She could kill you with a wink of her eye 

Doing All Right With The Boys, Joan Jett - Six does not particularly want to do the legwork of rebuilding a city she would MUCH rather be out fucking shit up but her wives will not let her go out by herself 

Hey you, what you gonna do Now I'm makin' all the noise again Hey you, what you gonna do Now I'm playin' with my toys again Now I'm back with the boys again

Graveyard, Halsey- Veronica to Six in the very early days of their relationship

They say I may be making a mistake I would've followed all the way, no matter how far I know when you go down all your darkest roads I would've followed all the way to the graveyard 

Party Poison, by MCR- I snaffled a line out of this for the museum gunfight scene but the opening lines are Very Six

Everybody pay attention to me I got the answer

Head On (Hold On To Your Heart) by Man Man, also something I recently stole a chapter title out of. like i said recently, not too many hopeful songs about being shot in the head

There's a knock at your door You don't even recognize the stranger It's you from before Tryin' to warn you all about the dangers There's a hole in your head At least that's what everybody's guessing

Feel Good Time, P!nk @thatdeepandlovelydark said So What reminded them of Six and I agree. this P!nk song specifically makes me think of early aughts Vegas heist movies. this song was not in the movie Domino (2005, a very weird Keira Knightley vehicle) but it should have been 

Put a banner over my grave, Make a body work, Make a begger hurt, Sell me something big and untamed,

Gold Guns Girls, Metric- Veronica mourning an AU where Six becomes House’s attack dog. 

All the gold and the guns and the girls (couldn't get you off) All the boys, all the choices in the world

I remember when we we're gambling to win Everybody else said better luck next time

I Like It Like That, Pete Rodriguez- this is oddly specific but I imagine Six boppin through the Tops Casino after killing Benny, just checking her new place out  

I said I like it like that I've got the soul, I've got the thing I like it like that I've got the soul, baby look at me

Blue Eyes, the International Submarine Band- @morrak sent this to me like “Six trudging home after a very long day” and YEAH maybe the only song on this list that would fit right into the in-game radio 

Where I've got chores to keep me busy A clock to keep my time A pretty girl to love me With the same last name as mine And when the flowers wilt A big old quilt to keep us warm I've got the sun to see your blue eyes And tonight you're in my arms

Smile, Maisie Peters- this is song is upbeat but full of quiet menace and I love it a lot for her

Got bridges to burn and places to run Yeah, this smile is a loaded gun

It's my party, my body, my business It's my town and my crown and my hitlist