#this was Hard i cannot lie to you. and for what.
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There's something important I've been wanting to share with fellow snake caretakers, and it's that if you have been sweet to your snake and love them, they have probably told you hundreds of times they love you- but because we speak different languages most won't understand. It makes me a little sad thinking how hard they try to tell us, and some folks just don't recognize that and they hope their serpentine friends love them but never know for sure- or even believe the lie snakes aren't even capable of love at all. They are, they have brain structures similar to birds and not only are physically capable of feeling love, they also regularly display traits associated with love including empathy and self sacrifice to protect others they care about both in captivity and the wild.
Snakes express love through touch. Through cuddling, and vibing (being near someone not touching just happy to be in their company). There's another outdated lie that snakes cannot and will never enjoy being pet - likely this comes from someone seeing cats and dogs lick their young and enjoying being pet because it feels similar to what is natural to them but since snakes do not lick their young it was believed they could not enjoy this sensation outside of their nature.
But that's wrong. It IS their nature! They just don't use their tongue, they use their whole body! Thing is, a lot of people who see them slither over another snake don't realize it's more than just them going somewhere, and they think they're carelessly going over another snake. Sometimes that may be the case, but touch is also how they bond. I read an article detailing how a mother snake was tolerant of her babies climbing all over her. Tolerant? It's like if a toddler hugged their mommy and said they loved her- tolerant would be such a strange word to use. They are telling their mommy they love her through their very limited means of communication.
Isn't it incredibly sweet that a creature who is so so limited in communication made sure to have a way to say, "I love you." I think that's just the best news ever.
If you doubt what I'm saying well, a number of snake keepers can vouch for me they've also accidentally discovered that touch can also be romantic if you touch the wrong place where most wouldn't expect it to be.
But the point I'm trying to make is, I bet there's tons of people with pet snakes who are telling them over and over they love them, hoping their human understands. If your snake doesn't do this action it doesn't need they don't love you- it would come from them not having figured it out. They learn not just from instinct, but from each other. Not having a parent snake to teach them (like some species including rattlesnakes) they have to figure out everything on their own for the most part.
Many figure out how to express, "I love you" through touch. Most snake caretakers I imagine don't recognize the attempt to communicate as anything more than the animal slithering around- but if you look for it you might see your pet telling you! If they are on you and start slithering around but not going anywhere in particular (sometimes back and forth) ESPECIALLY if you pet your snake and they relax/enjoy it- they are probably trying to pet you. And in doing so, show they care about you too, that they love you.
Scoria pets me with her chin, and I've never heard of anyone else's snake do this. She has, however, taught this to her sister who now pets me both ways.
It would be neat to hear if anyone sees their snake doing this and realizing what it really means. (Your snake might have even learned another way if you don't pet them and show them love another way- sometimes they learn by copying us too.)
Hope this helps someone- please share if your snake has a way they show they love you, I see very little on this from other caretakers and would be so happy to hear if others have similar experiences.
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https://www.tumblr.com/chimggukchim/770049627903901696/but-it-will-not-and-cannot-be-what-it-was-before?source=share
First thing first i saw another anon say this anon is a tkkr who's sneaking in jkk space when i can very well tell anon is just a jkkr who has seen difference in jikook over the chapt2 era. Just because one jkkr doesn't agree with another doesn't mean they HAVE to be from another ship. And Tkkrs don't talk about jkk the way anon talked because it's hard for Tkkrs to even address the things jkk did together Especially GCFT so anon is definitely not a tkkr.
Second idk in which spaces YOU were because the whole jikook tag was clogged with very much negativity during AYS Especially after 1st,2nd ep because everyone was Feeling the difference in the way jk talked to anon because we have never seen them bicker this much after their debut self. over these past few yrs we have seen them very much be sweet towards e/o and not really bicker atleast not to the level of AYS and it was maybe because we never had full hrs of just jkk only so we're seeing their raw self so maybe jkk have been this way towards e/o for long time but we just never got to witness it before and hence why it was kinda shocking for many jkkrs and yes there was very much negativity. talking about how jk said "Jimin is dead" and laughed when jm was sick because some jkkrs didn't like that because they haven't seen jk talk like that etc etc. If you need @ of the blogs who's seen this negativity ask me and I'll definitely provide it in next ask (I'm not doing in this one because I don't wanna disclose their @ to other anons who might attack them).
Yes the 1st ep looked awkward maybe because they haven't hangout together for some time and when they're doing they're in front of cam so they don't know how to act, It happens when you're meeting s/o after some time and haven't exactly planned things you're doing or you haven't thought it thoroughly. They Started loosening up at the end of 2nd ep. And if anyone talks about their physical closeness as why would they be close like that when they are awkward then ITS taekook is good example of that why or how.
anon didn't lie when they said that jk didn't bother showing up for jm anywhere because that's true. he was at hybe for CK most probably saw jm is practicing stopped there and went home exactly like how he showed up at one of hobi's filming during JITB because the set was in hybe. That time jm specifically asked jk to come to show support to him more and jungkook didn't come again. we saw jm's practice BB and jk wasn't there again and when jk asked when was jm's next music show jm also told him that jk has already seen his dance during practice so it's normal to assume the practice was last one. yes he might have came for another practice but given we haven't seen I'll chose not to make up that "he came to the practice again" because if everyone just start assuming things with nothing to back up there's no difference them and Tkkrs.You remembered what jm said what during serendipity recording then how did you forgot what jm said During festa 2022 when jk was whinning about jm not showing him his songs along with other members?? let me tell you jm said "Well i told you, asked you all to come and see me work" so didn't jm give open invitation here to ALL members including jk? so did he go or not? i guess not if we go by the whinning he was doing over jm not showing him his song, we have also seen jk watching jm doing filter practice so I'm sure coming again for jm's other practices or MV sets to "show support" shouldn't be so hard given jk went to dream movie premiere, and a musical of tae's frnds to show support or wtv it was. plus given how jk traveled to Hawaii when tae said he missed jk so the hybe building (hobi saw jm there working as well so the pdogg house wasn't the only place jm worked) and before you wonder how new i am it's my 5th year in the Fandom. not as old as you but old enough to have known all of their contents.
Jimin talked about him talking with jk about music for hrs and said that he'd tell jk what he learned so i think he was talking about the time AFTER they shot in NYC for AYS. jm talked about going to vocal lessons when he was working on muse(in his live) so I'm assuming he talked with jk about music after NYC trip where he also heard "Who" for the very first time. my personal assumption which I'm pretty sure of is that jk wasn't aware of what's going on with jm when he was working on FACE and the live jk did after face dropped was him just catching up with what's jm doing. I mean he didn't even know when jm was doing his music shows etc etc. my personal assumption tho.
There's no need for jkk to lie to us and say "you didn't call me when i was free and i didn't call you when u were free" because they simply could have not said anything rather than lying. I'm definitely not a tkkr who spin their words to fit my narative so I'll take things as it is said to us when I don't see any reason for them to lie to us.
Yes having e/o in military is a comfort for them but I'll ask u if u get an option of enlisting alone OR u can Enlist with ur friend whom you know for a decade now what option would u chose? won't u wanna go with ur frnd if U actually have an option? given the status they have it's obvious more comfort for them that they have their frnd with them so I believe any normal human would chose to go with their frnd than alone with given option. and jkk do have visible tattoes so they obviously have limited options that don't mean they have to go with e/o BUT why not go with ur frnd than go alone? it's very natural doens't have to be "they can't live w/o e/o".
And just like Taekook changed jikook changed as well. many have hard time beliveing it but that's what how atleast some of us see it. have some points to add for this topic as why but it's already too long so I'll stop.
Thank you, anon, for the oh so detailed read.
And for also proving my point that some people on here actually believe that the only times jikook have ever interacted in their entire lives is when they film content for us.
Bravo!
I was going to just leave it at that but I've got some time so why not write more?
Anon not being a tkkr? Yeah, okay. It is true that not all jikookers have the same opinion. Some support, some simply ship and can become very insecure because they don't actually see jikook as two actual people in an actual relationship. But I actually have working braincells and can very easily spot tkkr rhetoric as opposed to insecure jikooker rhetoric. Anon was a tkkr clearly trying to gaslight. I can actually point out very specific phrases used if you'd like.
Jikook have never bickered before AYS? Really?! REALLY?! You stated you're five years into this fandom so my assumption is your consumption of content begins at 2019. Because there is NO WAY that anyone could have seen jikook interactions since 2013, and claimed they have only ever been 'lovey-dovey'.
If there was any awkwardness at the very beginning of filming (which I still have yet to see), do you know why? It's because Jimin and Jungkook DIDN'T HAVE A CLUE WHAT THEY WERE FILMING! They didn't even have a frigging name for the show! To the point that they, along with the staff said on multiple occasions that they didn't even know if this even would be released. Not because they were awkward with each other but because they were just going with the flow for the first time. And as entertainers, they needed to feel out the situation to provide content for us. Guess what? That takes a bit of time.
And your whole essay on JK not being there for Jimin? I'm not even going to go into detail because clearly the only time Jimin and Jungkook interact is when a camera is rolling.
Finally the military thing. You know what would have been more comforting than each other? Being assigned to an area that wasn't the most dangerous and active. And visible tattoos have nothing to do with anything as a lot of persons have posted about. It may have barred them from a select few, but certainly not all other avenues. And Jungkook could have just as easily chosen Taehyung to enlist with. But he didn't. And I hardly think he tossed a coin or that Jimin was the second option. The apparently indigestible fact remains that jikook actively chose each other.
You claim that jikook changed, just like Taekook, and that's just how some of 'you' see it. Fine. Everyone's entitled to their opinion. And I would actually genuinely be interested in those 'whys' you mentioned.
But please, when you do, make sure you can clearly reference from the beginning.
Because I can also do that to show how jikook's relationship has changed over the years. Only, it's not going to be the change you see.
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Dear Petty! If you’ve been keeping up with the tea: what is your latest assessment of the Joong/Est drama? Twitter is saying that Joong is hyping the beef because both he and Est have shows airing at the same time. It seems that Est stans (… 🤨) are also claiming talent superiority. And Joong has this pinned to his Twitter timeline:
Do you have the latest dish download?
Turtles!!!! Fun fact! TMZ is known for delivering celebrity gossip; however, on the bias scale, they fall nicely in the middle because the company doesn't have a clear bias, and the news source is actually pretty reliable. The reason the source doesn't score higher in reliability is because the writers try to analyze what they see instead of solely reporting what has been seen. I offer this tidbit because in the weeks since those "JoongDunk Divorce Era" posts on Twitter and Reddit, these basic facts have emerged:
Joong DID block Est. They both unfollowed each other on Instagram and Twitter, but Joong blocked Est. I will not TMZ this up and try to analyze why he did that, but the fact is he did and the youths have verified it.
The "divorce era" JoongDunk posts came in November, but people noticed the Est and Joong drama way back in SEPTEMBER because even at the beginning of October, everyone and their mama went to the ATEEZ concert and Joong and Est did not interact even though they were both there in the same vicinity with various GMMTV people like Mint, Neo, and Arm.
Daou went on the defense about the "Est is wrecking the DaouOffroad home" and posted several times about him and Offroad being fine when people tried telling him he needed to spend more time with Offroad.
A person actually questioned Dunk (if my memory is correct) about the incident where he hung out with Pond and Est while Joong was out of town during a fan meet. I know the post exists of the actual piece of paper with the question, but I cannot find it now! (Chismosa 101, Lesson #1 - Always get the screenshots!)
Joong went on his little trip with First and Khaotung sans Dunk
Joong and Dunk have stated they had a disagreement not just once
BUT TWICE!
And Joong said only they could fix it.
JASP.ER was announced where Joong will be working with Dunk's bestie, Pond, who also was at the infamous dinner with Dunk and Est and who the people ship with Dunk
Then Est went on record and stated he has a very small circle of friends and he is currently single because it's really hard for him to talk to people
Finally, Joong made a cameo on Est's currently airing show, ThamePo, which as far as I'm aware, Joong strangely did not promote. However, I don't have a Twitter account, so I could have missed it.
So now I will put on my TMZ cap:
As much as I want the fictional and real gays to lie, I think that this is the tea — Joong and Est got beef hence why Est was blocked and they aren't interacting. Sides were picked, problems arose from the way people operated (*cough* Dunk *cough*), and instead of GMMTV learning anything from the Tay and Gun kiss, the ongoing Joss bullshit, or ANY incident prior to this, GMMTV somehow didn't go full Adele's management team and pull these boys' social media or give them social media training, so here I am as a Jaidee fan first, and a human second enjoying the hell out of The Heart Killers and praying for Dare You to Death to get filmed just in case the separation sticks and my troublesome tykes divorce before the first gay marriage actually even happens in Thailand.
So yeah . . .
That's that on that!
#I am a jadie fan first#and a human second#so I stay lurking in spaces for no good reason#just reading the chisme while in a Buc-ee's#This is the chisme I love watching from a distance#these poor boys don't even know what hit them#they don't deserve this smoke#and here I am being messy about it#joong gets me in the divorce though#I need the Est people to speak into the mic
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Evie's Quacktacular Spectacular Celebration (A Competition for No Reason)
Ducks are beautiful(Tommy: Oh, dear God...). And I wanted to celebrate their existence. January 19th is National Duck Day and January 13th is National Rubber Ducky Day...which is bull shit! Everyday, under Evie, is duck day. Why? Because there is nothing greater than a duck and a slab of cheese...man, I love cheese, too. Cheese goes with everything. And ducks? Man's best friend(Tommy: That is a dog, Evie, a dog). IN EVIE LAND...ducks are a man's best friend......Anyway, let's look at 5 great things about ducks!
Any questions so far?! (Finn: What planet are you from?). Daddy! (Tommy: Finn, we know Evie is...different, but let's just get on with it, eh....). Okay, good...any questions about DUCKS? (John: they go well with a nice fig sauce. Arthur: I do like a nice roasted duck...). We don't eat ducks in Evie land! Anyway, seeing as we don't have a single intelligent thought among us about the slide show...I'm moving on......
To celebrate the beauty of ducks, I will host a competition. It is not a serious one, but just something silly for laughs. Anyone in the Peaky Blinders fandom can contribute, whether or not they follow my story. :) As long as you are 18 and over. None of the sections are overly strenuous or hard, but all three are incredibly silly. Please enjoy and there will be prizes! You can join all three, but you cannot submit more than one submission per a game. :) All entries must be submitted by Friday, January 3rd at 8:00pm EST. All winners will be announced Saturday, January 4th at 8:00pm EST. Some Rules: ---> You can enter all three games, but you can only submit once per a game. You can win a spot in all three, but you can't win #1 in more than one.
---> You don't have to follow Novashelby or ohcheezusitsevie, but all submissions have to be submitted to ohcheezusitsevie. You want to submit it through the ask box and you can't be on anon!
---> For the drawing, it has to be YOUR OWN. For the joke, you can use a previously published one, just tell me where you got it.
In game one, you will submit a little drawing that you did of a duck. You are probably wondering to yourself, I CAN'T DRAW. And guess what? You should still do it because it is funny and for fun. I am not judging on accuracy or artistic skills. I am judging solely on how much I smiled and giggled. :) This drawing doesn't have to take fancy art supplies or a lot of time. Just a pencil is fine! Prizes: -> There are 3 winners spots and so, there are 3 prices. ->1st Place: You will win a 1,000 word one-shot. Nova, my creator, will write anything of your choosing within the Peaky Blinders Fandom. It can be an OTP, smut, fluff, Y/N, and so on and so forth. ->2nd Place: You will win an 800 word one shot that abides by the same rules as above. -> 3rd Place: You will win a 500 word One Shot that abides by the same criteria as above!
This one is really silly! And kind of a lie because...there are no ugly ducks(Finn: Really? I can name one-OW!). Ignore him, he's insignificant. In this game, you will find the "ugliest" duck picture you find and submit it. The one that makes me snort my choccy milk out of my nose the hardest, wins. These pictures should be kind to the ducks...obviously nothing that shows abuse or neglect. We don't like that in Evie land. And no ducks with fig sauce on it, either....(John: ☹️). Prizes:
->There will be three winners, and so there will be three prizes.
-> 1st Place: You will win a Moodboard of your chosen theme, and Nova will surprise you with a 200 word drabble. ->2nd Place: You will win a Moodboard of your chosen theme, and Nova will surprise you with a 100 word drabble. -> 3rd Place: You will win a Moodboard with a 50 word drabble of your choice.
For this game, you can either send in an original joke or the funniest one you find. They have to be duck oriented, but no jokes about abuse or eating ducks. :( Only duck friendly jokes. If you get it from elsewhere, you should tell me where. :) And the joke that makes daddy laugh the most, wins. (Tommy: what?! Evie, you can't just subject people to things...I did not agree to this. Am I being compensated?). And that will be hard, considering Daddy hasn't laughed since 1914.....I'll give him some whiskey before...
Prizes:
-> There will be three winners and three prizes!
->1st Place: 350 word drabble of your chosen themes and characters. -> 2nd Place: 250 word drabble of the same criteria as above. ->3rd Place: 150 word drabble of the same criteria as above!
Well, that's it for now folks! I urge everyone to join whether or not they are familiar with me. :) It is all for silly laughs and fun, and Miss. Nova just wants people to have a good time. There is no need to follow or be following Nova or me. Remember, all submissions should be entered here at this blog, not Novashelby. If you have any questions, remember to ask them at this blog as well. :) Remember, adhere to the deadlines and rules.
Have fun my ducky friends!
#ducks#peaky blinders#peaky blinders fanfiction#games#competitions#competition#writing#creative writing#writing games#oc#fandom
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christmas party day 2 - a nonsense christmas
summary: pop star reader releases a raunchy christmas song
warnings/pairings: fem!singer!reader x aaron hotchner, use of y/n, a few sex jokes?
i love sabrina carpenter sm! used lyrics from a nonsense christmas, is it new years yet?, and santa doesn’t know you like i do!!! also i posted 2 fics in one day?? this one’s long asf i apologize 😭
fic under the cut! i love you all!
y/n.y/ln
♡liked by bbygirlgarcia, billieeilish, and 471,608 others.
y/n.y/l/n i need that charles dickens 💋
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reneerapp woah mama
↳ y/n.y/l/n ilyyy
spencerwreid love the songs, y/n but please never ever sing about my boss’s “huge north pole” ever again.
↳ itgirl_emily CANT FORGET ABOUT “BIG SNOWBALLS” HELLO???
↳ y/n.y/l/n mb chat 😔
user THIS SONG IS SO GOOD OH MY GODDD
user oh i just know her boyfriend is treating her right
chocolatethunder @aaronhotchner05 you are one lucky duckling
↳ aaronhotchner05 trust me, i know
user omg this is iconic
user i’m so jealous of her super secret boyfriend she won’t tell us about 🙄
thedavidrossi i know too much about your relationship with aaron from these songs…
↳ y/n.y/l/n but they’re good, don’t lie
↳ thedavidrossi they’re beautiful, bella
↳ jjiscraycray grammy winning fs
bbygirlgarcia come back to virginia i miss you!!
↳ y/n.y/l/n i miss you more, angel 😭❤️
↳ itgirl_emily hey what about me????
↳ y/n.y/l/n obv i miss you too em???
aaronhotchner05 you are incredible, i’m so proud of you sweetheart
↳ y/n.y/l/n ohhhh i’m soooo writing a song about you as we speak
itgirl_emily
♡liked by jjiscraycray, chocolatethunder, and 232 others.
itgirl_emily is it new years yet??
👤: y/n.y/l/n
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y/n.y/l/n y/n reference????
↳ itgirl_emily when she writes the most pussy popping bops in the world 😩😩
↳ y/n.y/l/n when she’s a sexy fbi agent 😩
↳ aaronhotchner05 ???
↳ y/n.y/l/n don’t worry, you’re even sexier 😛
chocolatethunder our girl is back!!!
↳ aaronhotchner05 **my girl
↳ chocolatethunder my bad boss
bbygirlgarcia I MISSED YOU Y/N OMGGG, NEVER GO ON TOUR EVER AGAIN
↳ y/n.y/l/n never ever again, i promise!!!
spencerwreid never let these two drink together ever again.
aaronhotchner05
♡liked by y/n.y/l/n, chocolatethunder, and 246 others.
aaronhotchner05 “snowflakes in my stomach when we’re kissin’”
👤: y/n.y/l/n
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y/n.y/l/n oh my i am smiling and giggling so hard
y/n.y/l/n WHEN HE LISTENS TO YOUR MUSIC ABSJDKWBEU
↳ spencerwreid he makes us listen to you on repeat on the jet.
y/n.y/l/n I LOVE MY MANNNNN
y/n.y/l/n wow i’m really in love with you it’s not even funny anymore
↳ aaronhotchner05 i love you so much more baby
bbygirlgarcia I STILL CANNOT BELIEVE YOU PULLED Y/N Y/L/N.
thedavidrossi i’m so happy for you, aaron
↳ aaronhotchner05 i’m so happy for me too
chocolatethunder how did hotch pull a literal pop star
↳ y/n.y/l/n did you listen to the songs 👀
↳ chocolatethunder EW EW EW EW
y/n.y/l/n
♡liked by aaronhotchner05, arianagrande, and 501,973 others.
y/n.y/l/n santa doesn’t know you like i do ❤️
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user SHE POSTED HIM OH MY GOD
user IM SO HAPPY FOR HERRRRR
chappellroan oh this is my favourite thing ever??
user who is heeeee
↳ y/n.y/l/n santa
aaronhotchner05 don’t you wanna wrap me up and mistle touch under the tree?
↳ y/n.y/l/n AARON ANDKABDSJ IM GONNA MELT
jjiscraycray i’m so happy you’re in our lives 🥹
↳ y/n.y/l/n trust me j, i’m even happier 🩷
taglist for hotch!
@boccacciobunny @guacam011y@hotchhner @samaldonado5 @rousethemouse @mrs-prentiss @thawnexwells @minnimaffin @starkid024@abandonlilly @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @auggieblogs @yaykeira@justyourusualash @lover-of-books-and-tea
#luvhotchner#aaron hotchner#criminal minds#criminal minds incorrect quotes#social media au#criminal minds texts#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds fanfic#instagram au#christmas#sabrina carpenter
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Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers (except me because obvs I have done it). Spread the self-love ❤
AHHH LIN!!! ok ok uhhhh. this is cheating a little bit bc two of these are series but they really are so special to me, i can't possibly pick just one chapter/installment from either of them. anyways, here are five of my favorites, not necessarily in order (edit: why the FUCK was this so hard???):
Noble Blood - stsg x gn reader; jjk dragon rider au. by word count, this is the longest multichap fic i've ever posted. it's really niche, since it's 1.) a reader insert, 2.) a poly ship, & 3.) a high fantasy AU, but it one of my favorite things i've ever written in my life, and i've been writing (fic & original writing) for over half my life.
Transfem Gojo - trans woman gojo satoru x gn reader. i've always loved playing around with characters' genders and sexualities, which like... there's definitely some projection happening there, but we don't need to talk about that. i also didn't expect the concept to turn into a whole series, but it has, and honestly i couldn't be happier about it, especially when it brought one of my favorite people into my life ( @dr-runs-with-scissors ily) and when i see how much other people love her, even if it's a very small group. again, a very niche concept, but i love it.
Too Much - kocho shinobu x gn autistic reader; shinobu helps reader through a meltdown. this fic was a gift for red ( @redlikerozez), actually! i really like this one bc, as someone who is autistic, it fulfilled a very specific hole in the reader insert space (at least in my experience). it was also nice to write for a character i hadn't yet written for, who is also a female characters and a character that generally has less fic written about her!
Lucky Shot - outlaw geto suguru & fem reader; platonic w/ open ending; gun violence, blood/injury, minor character death. i really liked all the entries i did for riley's collab, but this one is probably my favorite of the three! it was also my first geto fic that didn't include gojo.
Day Off - maki & gn reader; you spend the day at the arcade. this fic is the only one i've ever written based on a request (for @/yuutito), but it was so much fun to write! maki deserves more fics and writing something platonic is always nice.
honorable mention goes to my selkie shoko x gn reader fic Lost & Found.
#asks answered#fallon's friends#luminous lin#this was Hard i cannot lie to you. and for what.#also doing this made me realize that almost everything i write is super niche lmao#OH FUCK I NEED TO GET READY FOR WORK THIS TOOK SO MUCH LONGER THAN I THOUGHT
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If you truly want to do what's best for mentally ill people, you have to learn that you often won't be able to separate the "salvageable" parts of ourselves with our illnesses, and you can't pretend like we are sane people underneath the façade of insanity, like we can flip a switch and magically erase the differences that make us "disordered"
#mental health#mental health advocacy#i'm not sure how best to explain it but i see this attitude a lot that anything even mildly 'unsightly' must be punished or ignored...#...or fear mongered...#...or this idea that we *are* just secretly... not disordered and that we can choose every single aspect of our disorders and how...#...that will impact us and our world#it's really hard to explain if you haven't experienced it yourself. it's so hard to know that who you Fundamentally Are is seen as unhuman#that you cannot be disordered and seen as an equal in so many scenarios is precisely what i mean by 'if you want to do right [by us]'#we shouldn't HAVE to present as non-disordered or non-ill just to be treated like a person#i shouldn't have to be forced to pretend like my illnesses are an optional part of who i am that OTHERS should ignore so they can 'love me'#my illnesses are intrinsically tied to Who I Am. i will never have the opportunity to know what Being Sane is like and i shouldn't...#...have to pretend like that isn't the case#it's just fucked up to me to know that people would rather that we just... ignore often fundamental parts of who we are for *their* comfort#maybe that's how i'd word it? i find this a very complex topic but at the core...#...the idea is that we shouldn't have to fucking live a lie for the sake of the 'normal' folk#(obviously 'normal' isn't accurate on a technical level but it conveys how i see the conflict)
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hey folks did you know i love super dangan ronpa 2
#marzi speaks#thinking abt the themes in that story#ESPECIALLY the letting other people’s perceptions dictate who you are vs choosing who you are for yourself and not letting anyone stop you#like almost every single one of the sdr2 cast has a front they put on/identity they’re ‘supposed’ to be vs who they truly are#komaeda’s i could write an essay on so we’re gonna skip him bc. energy#hajime’s is obvious. i don’t need to explain that one. though he tries really hard to come off as more masculine as well which. augh#speaking of masculine souda is a victim of toxic masculinity. he was bullied and had a dad who sucked so he changed himself to look fiercer#ibuki left her band due to ‘creative differences’- she didn’t fit into that classic pop band mold and she allowed herself to deviate#mahiru puts extra pressure on men around her bc Her Dad Also Sucked and she’s sick of having to deal with weaponized incompetence#gundham is this sweet kind kind boy who hides it all underneath a veil of darkness. the darkness is not a lie either though he is both#sonia. literally a princess. has huge shoes to fill. in reality she’s a horror fiend who just wants to nerd out abt true crime#nekomaru’s heart condition would have taken him out of sports forever but he found another way and started team managing instead#fuyuhiko is set up to be the next head of the kuzuryu clan but on the inside he is so compassionate (and canonically a prude lmao)#peko is literally raised as a tool and tries to embrace this role even though the one she works for just wants her to be herself#i haven’t seen hiyoko’s ftes but i imagine she’d be far less cruel if she didn’t have to deal with constant infantilization and perverts#twogami just. as a whole. the whole character. yeah#there’s for sure more but i haven’t seen everyone’s ftes so. yanno#like fuck !!!!!! people will always have a perception of what they think you should be but you cannot truly be happy#until you allow yourself to disregard those expectations and forge your own path instead !!!! fuck !!!!!
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SO!!! To anyone unaware, early this month I entered @catmask and @frogcroaks' Monster Mayhem contest!! I made a messed up crab that I called the Haven Crawler. And. Uh. Holy shit, my crab was Lemmy (frogcroaks) judge's choice. So I figured to thank them (and everyone who said. such unbelievably nice things in the chat) I'd post the actual images present in the ref, transparent and on their own!!
Again I want to thank both of the judges for all of the unbelievably kind words they said about my lil guy, and to the chat who was so incredibly nice as well. I honestly still kind of feel like I'm dreaming, and words cannot even begin to express how much this means to me. I've never felt more motivated in my life to continue creating. Thank you.
#monster mayhem#monster mayhem 2024#my art#my designs#[i wont lie ive been happy crying on and off i think i popped off so hard i gave myself a headache LMAO]#[I'M FINE THOUGH DON'T WORRY]#[but uh. i dont wanna get too deep abt my own stuff or anything but. i cannot express how badly i needed to hear what you guys said]#[ive gone from being unsure if i was cut out for this to never being more sure in my life that i love doing art]#[ive been confident in my own skills!! but to hear it from outside like this is. indescribable to me. im still processing it honestly]#[thank you so much]#blood tw#death tw#horror tw#ask to tag
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one thing abt being disabled/chronically ill that some people don’t get is that sometimes body maintenance that ensures you have the absolute minimum amount of function can also be something that takes away a lot of control and autonomy. you can argue till the cows come home that making those decisions to try and help yourself (or realistically to try to make sure things aren’t worse than they already are) is something that exhibits control and autonomy and stuff, but they can be so limiting in practice because they’re things that take up so much time but have to be done to do anything else
#i have to sleep a lot. i’m at the point where functioning requires 8 hours of sleep if not more#I should probably be getting 10+ but i’m a student and i work so 8 is the minimum. but then also getting ready for bed is a whole process s#the whole thing can take 10-12 hours depending how much im sleeping. just to make sure i can do anything#that is time in my day i cannot use for anything else. it’s not ‘oh but i can push through it’ because i can’t without spending the next da#lightheaded and nauseous and vaguely dizzy and with such intense brain fog I can’t think with my fatigue so bad i genuinely don’t know how#get myself to work a lot of days. my abled peers don’t have to deal with this at all. they have unlimited study time if they want to#and yeah it is a choice i’m making that’s true i could just not do. except i would lose my job and fail out of college because i would not#be able to get to classes or do my homework or think. but being told ‘but you are making choices about your life’ when i have lost so much#of what i used to be able to do because i am spiralling down and continuing to get worse is so.#literally last year i would wake up at 6:30 and then go to school till 3 and then go to my internship until 10 and get home at 11 and be in#bed anywhere from midnight to two in the morning and then wake up the next day and do it all again. i graduated with a 3.9 gpa and made it#into my top college while dealing with my cancer symptoms and then the two surgeries about it#but now i lose half my day to just making sure i can get out of bed. i can’t go anywhere because my body is physically too exhausted#any extra time goes into doing homework or occasionally time to myself#not decimating my health by doing minimum body care responsibilities isn’t freeing. occasionally i have a good day which is freeing but tha#usually goes into just. other things outside class or work or eating. I don’t go do something for myself or go do something fun on good day#because I still can’t. good days just mean i don’t want to lie down on the pavement when i’m going somewhere#I just. I don’t magically have control over my life because i try to get enough sleep. i lose half my day to doing that and ultimately it’s#just a bodily function that would have to happen anyway#this is a vent post im just having a really hard time right now because it feels like im in exponential decline. it was nowhere near this#bad last semester. my grades are tanking and i have no free time because anything outside of sleep is either work or school#vent tw#yall can rb this just ignore my tags completely#disability#chronically ill#i keep trying to explain to people how pots works because that’s all logical but there’s no way to explain what it’s doing to my body or ho#i feel all the time. the last time i felt this bad was when i had a bad flu or immediately after surgeries because i don’t react well to#anesthesia and always come out of them feeling like shit. and now i just feel like this all the time and it’s only getting worse#I can’t even stay up late anymore because my body feels like it isn’t counting the sleep even if I get 8 hours#I can deal if I have a free day the day after but that just leaves Friday and Saturday nights and I usually still have to do homework
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always love it when i go through a Major Crisis but you wouldn't guess from the way i post <3 anyways I'm going through a Major Crisis
#will probably need to visit a crisis centre in the next couple of hours I'm just waiting for my mum to get here#its always like 'this cannot continue' and it always does and it always makes me feel shitty in the long run#i feel like im missing some kind of component that other people have#like i genuinely dont know how people manage to live life#when im on the verge of kms like every single day even when I'm 'happy'#i just want to die all the time#like thats not great 👍#and unfortunately its hard for other people as well not just me#and i keep getting into these situations when others worry about me and idk what to say like 'dont worry' is a lie. but also like#i dont want them to worry#you see
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small little thing abt botw/totk and the future of zelda games considering it seems likely that future zelda games might be in the same style as those two and how i feel like botw/totk don't actually feel like zelda games (kind of messy i just typed this out in a kind of informal or whatever way) (this post is long af btw so uhhhh yeah)
im part of the group that claims that botw/totk aren't 'real' zelda games but... i guess they are technically 'real' zelda games, but... they sure as fuck don't feel like it, and because of that, i'm not at all excited with the idea of future loz games being in the same style, especially with the pitfalls these last two games have fallen into having been things that past zelda games did especially well, it feels like things have been sort of flipped on their heads in terms of what's being valued or whatever
like... the best parts of older zelda games were things like the story and the characters and the puzzles and the dungeons and stuff like that... the best parts of botw/totk right now are just the gameplay. people enjoy these new characters, but they dont have the narrative backing that older games do, they don't have the same impactful arcs or roles allowed by a more linear story
the point i want to get at though is how botw/totk honestly don't feel like direct evolutions or steps up from past zelda games but rather just... entirely different game styles (open world games) with the zelda flavoring and worldbuilding and story styling slapped on top.
i mean... i feel like a half-decent example of some other well-known franchises that have jumped on this (honestly kind of thoughtless) open-world bandwagon are mario (mario odyssey) pokemon (sword/shield and scarlet/violet) fire emblem (kind of. with some free-walking segments in 3 houses and engage) and the soulsborne type games (elden ring), these are all other well known and storied game series' that have somewhat made the move to open world, and i think that switch was a bit smoother, kept the core and integrity of the games that came before much better than botw/totk did
elden ring is the easiest to explain- the gameplay loop and core mechanics are the same and build upon past games' you just have more room to run around and get killed in with some little open-world flourishes like material gathering.
fire emblem is... a bit less flexible in terms of changing up the core gameplay, and the addition of open-world segments are added to add bonuses to the strategy gameplay and allow for more support-building oppourtunities and little minigames, and its more or less evolution from echoes' dungeon-crawling bits and the customizable castle in fates. the core gameplay still effectively works the exact same, just with some little class or mechanic tweaks and additions.
mario odyssey, though each world was pretty massive, still had your typical 3d mario platforming, and the new hat stuff fit in pretty well with olderpowerups and gimmicks, and the boss battles feel and work pretty similarly to the way they used it- odyssey does feel like an evolution from past mario games (ps. playing two-player with one person as cappy snaps the game in half. its the secret easy mode lol)
the new pokemon games are pretty much just the same as past pokemon games, theyre just open world and buggy as fuck rip have extra little open-world flourishes that build on what past games set up. the battling works the same as ever and the progression is the same with a number of powerful trainers you have to battle to continue forward.
with botw/totk... the progression is dramatically different in terms of power-scaling, world presentation, item-gathering, puzzle-solving... pretty much everything in the established zelda format. i get that it was pretty much the aim with botw to have a fresh start and throw out a lot of the old standards but it just makes them feel so dramatically alien to past zelda games; theyre completely different experiences in pretty much every single way, and as such they dont feel like what we've (well, people who have started with and spent a lot of time with other loz games) learned to associate with the zelda titles.
with open world games in general it's a bit harder to have a truly impactful narrative akin to those in past zelda games, anyways. i will admit that botw was a good execution of trying out something entirely new, and the narrative and gameplay and world actually complement each other very well, so despite what i've said in the past I can't really fault it's narrative too much since it's a less traditional sort of narrative and effectively does what it aims to do very well.
totk, on the other hand, proves that this style of game does not mesh with the old style of storytelling at ALL. linear games can have proper narratives with coherent stakes, developing characters, twists and reveals and building emotion and mood- and all of that is thrown out the window with totk when they decided to try and have both a more linear story with actual reveals and development and emotion, while also letting you literally spoil it for yourself out the gate.
you can't really have a well-executed story when players are capable of doing things drastically out of order and of jumping into story beats without the prior buildup and straight-up ruining what could be otherwise emotional reveals, and players being capable of doing this is hard-baked in how the game fundamentally works. I honestly feel bad for people who found the fifth sage by accident before anything else.
you can't effectively have a linear story with character growth and plot developments and impactful moments while also allowing it to be experienced out of order and with massive time gaps in between; with this kind of stuff, you can't really have your cake and eat it too. say what you will about the linearity of past zelda games, but i bet you that midna wouldn't be as beloved as a character as she is if it weren't for the linear order of the story and its events. certain parts of storytelling may demand for a linear manner of telling that story.
botw's story works because none of the memories reveal anything groundbreaking taht you don't already know; they are optional and merely give you more information about these characters from link's past and simply inform you about the girl keeping ganon at bay. if you find a late memory first, that's fine- it technically doesnt reveal anything too important to you, it just fills in some gaps for you and your player character. it makes sense within the story itself for the world to be so open and for you to be able to do what you can; the story is not the focus, nor is it even needed to beat the game. the story was made with the gameplay and what you are allowed to do in mind, and as such doesn't include things such as in-depth character development or important plot-twists.
on the other hand, you can easily spoil totk's biggest plot twist in a handful of different ways completely by accident, just by getting curious about the world around you. this can shatter a lot of the mystery or tension in the plot and this can happen completely by accident to someone playing the game organically and blindly. the story itself doesn't take this into account, it reads more like a linear story that would be more suited to a linear style of play, coming across things in order to ramp up the stakes and let things be revealed at the best possible time. (tbh totk's story doesnt seem to take the player into account in general, if the game forcing you to watch basically the same long cutscene four fucking times says anything, jesus christ)
narrative pitfalls aside, botw/totk put heavy emphasis on gameplay, but not in the same way older zelda games did, and as such trade away the unique items and gimmick-y game-specific mechanics for a small toolset handed to you out the gate. what botw/totk do- giving you everything you need from the start and having very little true varation in the gameplay from then on out- make sense and works just fine for an open world game. there is, however, a lack of actual depth to that gameplay that other open world games do have (off the top of my head, the ability to unlock and upgrade abilities and have general character upgrades in fenyx rising as well as the impressive depths of elden ring's combat and character customization system). the most depth botw/totk has to the actual gameplay is just the fourish different weapon types and the ways you use your fourish abilities (saying fourish bc for real ultrahand and fuse are fundamentally the exact same thing). there is also just raising the little defense numbers on your armor and getting more stamina and health, but that does absolutely nothing to the actual gameplay but make link more durable.
i mean, sure, health in past loz games just makes link more durable, too, but thats how health upgrades in any other game work.
the gameplay switch makes sense, considering the switch from a linear puzzle-adventure concentric game to a more sandbox-esque open-world game, but it does not mesh with the former loz formula at all, so while the shift in style makes sense, it makes me think that you can't have a previous-style loz experience in an open-world sandboxish sort of game. especially with how in totk you can very easily bypass most of the fire temple just using the mechanics handed to you at the start. you can't have the same type of zelda dungeons in a game where you are allowed to do it 'wrong' and the game itself does not allow for the same kinds of puzzles.
i am of the opinion that so long as future zelda games work the same way botw/totk did, we will not get old-school zelda-style dungeons again.
the loss of a variety of items used for specific puzzles and environment switches is the loss of a varied dungeon experience and the loss of the same kind of world and character progression as past zelda games.
you are handed everything you'll ever need at the start of botw/totk. the only thing that will meaningfully change is how much damage you do. there are no alternate strategies opened up by new items that can double as weapons, no new traversal options or routes opened up by things such as grappling hooks or clawshots or whips or specific wands. even the battle system is drastically different, instead of being enemies that take specific amounts of hits to die while you can obtain progressively stronger swords, enemies are just damage sponges and you can get all kind of weapons that just do different numerical amounts of damage.
the bosses themselves- big staples and draws of zelda games- also work extremely differently. instead of having to leverage specific items to expose weak spots or having to fight in a specific manner to do damage, you are just asked to... do damage. even in totk's bosses, where sage abilities are most certainly helpful, the only boss i found to truly require a sage ability was the lighting temple's boss; the others i either hardly used the sage at all (i didn't use yunobo at all in the second phase of the fire temple boss and hardly had a need for tulin with the wind temple boss [esp considering i was using a 3-shot lynel bow to make the poor fucker a cakewalk]) or found that alternative solutions felt better, like resorting to splash fruit on repeat water temple fights instead of wrestling with having to activate and use sidon's ability. the sages are honestly fairly poor replacements for dungeon specific items.
this kind of causes botw/totk to play more like a poor man's dark souls or just like any other open world rpgish game. i don't play botw/totk for the experience of a zelda game, i play it because it's an open world game that i can walk around in for five minute before switching to something else because i liked something in that other game better.
the combat in botw/totk isnt designed in such a way that makes it feel good. mineru's mech is fucking dismal, but since it's just either shooting with a bow or attacking with one of three types of melee weapon with some timing for a dodge, it can get stale fast. it doesn't necessarily even feel good, since there's not enough variety for it to get really engaging. (this is def an uneven comparison, but elden ring's combat feels considerable better with the different dodges you can do and the amount of attack options you have with just one weapon, not to mention the amount of control you have over your general fighting style.) combat in botw/totk at hour 1 is the exact same as combat in botw/totk at hour 100, the only different being the amount of damage you do or how much of a beating you can take.
it just... the styles of botw/totk can't allow them to feel the same as older zelda games. the shift in style was clearly a good move to draw in series newbies and shake things up, but it comes at the caveat of making them feel distant from their predecessors and uncomfortably similar to other games like them. it's hard to avoid comparisons with elden ring when on the surface they are very similar games, one just feels more true to its core identity
this all is said without mentioning the way in which botw/totk lore feels almost dismissive of past series staples and seems intent on not looking back while also taking every fucking attempt to nudge you and say 'hey, remember that zelda game' and honestly all that shit does is make me want to play a different zelda game.
botw/totk seem altogether very desperate to distance themselves from past zelda games while also being unable to really tear itself from what came before and it just culminates in me spotting linebeck island on the map and going 'damn i miss linebeck' and turning the fucking game off to play phantom hourglass instead. say what you will about phantom hourglass, but it certainly handles its story progression and character development infinitely better than the game that lets you accidentally shatter the impact of the story by deciding to check out that cool temple in the distance of the depths
#quick note abt the examples from early on i got the verdict on soulsborne games from my friend who has actually played more than elden ring#and pokemon was kinda a guess the most recently mainline pokemon game i have is sun/moon#totk has made me really think about what i like in video games and why lmao.#it has also made me appreciate botw a lot more. i prefer the emptier hyrule of botw it just feels extra cluttered in totk#i like how in botw its a lot more natural and more fun to honestly run around in with there being no falling debris or scary holes#salty talks#totk salt#being annoying abt totk again hiiiii. id like to talk abt stuff i liked in other loz games but its hard to start without some kind prompt#im not entirely sure how i could really explain how i feel totk's story failed and why without going in circles for a while#its just. the gameplay and the intended story experience clash like fucking crazy plus the story relies too much on the player#to do a lot of emotional heavy lifting#like. if you want to start a convo with me abt this go for it but this is what i have to say for rn#loz#legend of zelda#totk#botw#totk criticism#i do really appreciate botw now im not gonna lie. its still not amazing in my eyes but i appreciate it for what it is#also i cannot believe totk made linebeck island worse fuck you#like. in botw theres a goddamn chest with 50 rupees and thats a good subtle nod to what's being referenced#in totk theres just two bokoblins and nothing else and i dont care if it wouldve been lazy to just have the chest there again#you explicitly namedropped linebeck might as well make good on it. its more fun to continue having little nods like that#i understand when people say that saying botw isnt a 'real zelda game' is bad criticism but tbh its not really a criticism its just an#observation. it comes with its ups and downs and for me it makes me enjoy these games less and makes me feel a bit alienated#if that makes sense. idk. its late and if i continue with that thought im going to lose it for sure#ig just. im upset abt how totk handled its story and im upset at the idea of... this being the future of these games yknow#it feels like a selfish sentiment but idk#long post#bitching abt totk
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and what’s crazy to me about the situation where the actresses in pride and prejudice 2005 didn’t wear makeup, is that everyone is like. oh they’re lying. oh no one looks that pretty without a full face of makeup. oh it’s a lie they had a makeup artist credited and i don’t believe it was only for “continuity” they’re all lying!! like. are you for real so influencer pilled that you can’t believe that women can be beautiful and appealing to you without covering their faces in makeup. “but no makeup doesn’t translate as well on camera so they’re lying” actually if you know how to fucking film it right and light it right anything can look good just because YOU don’t think YOU look as good without makeup on your front facing phone camera doesn’t mean joe wright doesn’t know what he’s doing… like girl we all already knew kiera knightly was beautiful and had flawless skin is it truly so hard to believe she wasn’t caked in foundation
#jena malone wouldn’t lie to us ok…#i truly think our society is just so makeup pilled we can’t conceptualize the idea of beautiful women not being covered in makeup#and it makes me incredibly sad because then it’s like. well how do you react to women in your real life who aren’t wearing makeup#like are you looking at them and thinking ugh they’re so ugly because they don’t wear makeup#it cannot possibly be that hard to believe those actresses were really bare faced (in general)#men are filmed without wearing makeup all the time and you bitches are falling over yourselves to call them sexy. so what gives
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i literally need there to stop being situations circumstances events developments complications and happenstances. for the fucking love of god
#purrs#but there will never stop being any of those things so actually what i literally need is to learn HARD AND FAST how to stop getting so#fucking triggered over a situation i know is NOTHING so bad that im anxious for the entire rest of the day and can’t even get any work done.#like (jade from tesco voice) girls… im not gonna lie to you. i think therapy is not working. i think i am not mentally or emotionally strong#enough to work in this job and i think i am never going to get mentally or emotionally stronger. ive been stuck in the quicksand too long#and now im atrophying. i cannot develop the situational awareness and motor skills or awakeness (and i mean AWAKEness.) to safely and#consistently drive a car. i cannot develop the intellect and drive and courage to get an advanced degree or be in a leadership position that#everyone actually sees as a leadership position lmfao. and i cannot develop the emotional intelligence and inner peace to not get triggered#out of my fucking mind at work to the point where im having anxiety heart palpitations and fighting back tears. i am just stuck as i am#forever. and you know how i know that? BECAUSE IVE WORKED AT THE NATIONALLY RENOWNED CENTER FOR YOU-ARE-NOT-STUCK-AS-YOU-ARE-FOREVER FOR#FIVE FUCKING YEARS SINCE ITS LITERAL FOUNDING AND HELPED TO FOUND IT AND IM STILL LIKE THIS!!!!!!!!!!!! i go back to square one EVERY#FUCKING DAY!!!!!!!! how am i supposed to tell other people who they are is what they bring and the world can change and whatever when i am#the fucking antithesis of that. when i don’t even believe my own words. like the way i want to punch out every window in this building rn i#HATE BEING LIKe this i hate being in the psychic prison of scared little girl mode all the time forever no matter what and being beyond help#and disappointing and burdening the people around me because i can’t be fucking normal about like. hierarchy and institutional politics LOL#delete later
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✧
send me a ✧ and i’ll bold all that apply to your muse! (with italics as a 'sometimes' option because i'm a rule-breaker and things may depend on the situation).
i would kill you. ✧ i would physically hurt you. ✧ i would attack you unprovoked. ✧ i would manipulate you. ✧ i dislike you. ✧ you annoy me. ✧ you scare me. ✧ you intimidate me. ✧ i hope i intimidate you. ✧ i pity you. ✧ you disgust me. ✧ i hate you. ✧ i’m indifferent toward you. ✧ i’d like to get to know you better. ✧ i’d like to spend more time with you. ✧ i’d like to be friends with you. ✧ i’m unsure what to think of you. ✧ i’m unsure how I feel about you. ✧ you are my friend. ✧ you are my best friend. ✧ you are my mentor. ✧ i look up to you. ✧ i respect you. ✧ you are my hero. ✧ you inspire me. ✧ you are my enemy. ✧ you make me happy. ✧ i want to protect you. ✧ i would fight by your side. ✧ i consider you an equal. ✧ i think you are beneath me. ✧ i think you are above me. ✧ i would lie for you. ✧ i would lie to you. ✧ i would sleep with you. ✧ i would sleep by your side. ✧ i would hug you. ✧ i would kiss you. ✧ you are family to me. ✧ i would die for you. ✧ i would kill for you. ✧ i would trust you with my life. ✧ i would trust you with my most precious belonging. ✧ i would trust you with a secret. ✧ i would trust you with my biggest / darkest secret. ✧ i love you (platonically). ✧ i love you (romantically).
#sifonie#OOH BOYYY. the mixed nature of this is... JSJSJ i'm sorry about barton ramone he is justtt. Not the best person even around people-#he likes / cares about sometimes NGL and a lot of his relationships if not all of them are (unfortunately) unstable to at least a small-#degree. though of course i'm not trying to justify his behavior at all here... i just think that barton literally Cannot Help himself-#whenever it comes to manipulating people to the point where he may even do it unconsciously sometimes as terrible as that might sound 💀#and as for the whole 'you scare me' thing i think this just applies in the context of sibyl technically having the power to like. Kill him-#if they wanted to even if they wouldn't considering that they are like siblings to each other you know? and barton is naturally a-#distrustful person SO that also adds to him feeling a bit scared of them at times i think ahahhh.#but that's enough of talking about the negative stuff!! let's talk about how barton sees sibyl as an equal and would die for them...#because i honestly that serves as SUCH a dichotomy to the first thing's that i highlighted here and normally those thing's-#probably wouldn't coexist within the same person but if there is one thing that barton is - it's surprising in regards to how complex-#he can make his relationships with people JSJSJ LMAO but barton wanting to protect them is also? kind of sweet as well?? like OMG#plus the fact that they make him happy is 😭 it's really kind of touching in my humble opinion.#now if only barton didn't feel the need to LIE and still manipulate people sometimes even when he likes them...#then we'd be golden but i guess that would be asking for too much from him JSJSJ#not me talking as if he's real 😂 nooo but this was seriously really fun to fill out so thank you for sending this prompt to me ramone!!#and i hope i was able to shed a little more light on their relationship from barton's side of thing's bc i feel like it can be hard to tell#what barton truly thinks about someone even when i'm writing him in the 'stream of consciousness' style haha#also the italics is a 'maybe' in this case so it doesn't apply all the time!!
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Preach it! I wish people would realize how significant the overlap between the whump and the disability community is, and that we're not intruding or taking over spaces
Yeah. This wasn't a thing until recently, hence my additional annoyance with it. Like I said in the larger post, whump is a way for us to find common ground with each other and other people. I've learned a lot about the mechanics of pain disorders that aren't ME/CFS, and phenomena that are similar to what I experience but not exact, and not just on my own posts. I reblogged a reference post a while back from someone who has fainting spells, and I was fascinated to learn how much longer I'm typically unconscious for (30-90 seconds vs 2-15 wholeass minutes!). Previously I'd just thought unconsciousness was unconsciousness. It's been a good tool for me for talking to my doctors, even. One of the first things I'm asked when I mention my pain knocking me out is if I've ever fallen, to which I've always responded "??? By the time it's bad enough for me to pass out I've already had to sit/lie down??" Now I know why they're always asking what I thought prior to this was a weird and counterintuitive question, and I can say "I don't mean fainting, I mean passing out, this and that are different"... which is really going to help me in disability evaluations, because I've met a lot of lay people who are convinced that if you don't drop from a standing position it's not "real." All because somebody made a whump reference post for writers, and tagged it what it was so I could find it. And the thing is, there's already a dedicated "space for community things," it's called the actually tags, and it's why they exist. #actuallydisabled #actuallychronicallyill I use these all the time, and you know what? No fandom content. This is a total and complete non-issue. When this shit takes over your life, in my experience, you've got two options for what to do with the spoons you're left with. You can reach out, connect with people, find something you can do to counteract how the world treats you and feel human again... or you can sit around trying to make everyone else as miserable as you are. I choose Door #1.
#it's just sad seeing people define themselves by how the world treats us#and then go and reinforce it#like why#aren't you exhausted?#don't you want to define yourselves by your pursuit of the human experience#instead of all the ways the world at large tries to take that away?#i know it's hard to believe in others when you're isolated#i know what it's like to compromise for the sake of in-person company#i have one rule and it's don't lie to me#i kept somebody who broke that rule repeatedly around for years#because i didn't want to be by myself#and nobody else bothered to visit#but in the whump community I'm (for the most part) freed from that choice#and if there is something i absolutely cannot stand#as long as people care enough to tag diligently i can avoid it#my online experience can be shaped and built and curated#my irl experience cannot#why would i recreate the situation when I could have the first?#whump meta#not tagging my annoyance#this is an editorial not a beef#also the people who came after me failed their own test#had reblogged fandom content to the chronic pain tag themselves#and came clowning on my nonfiction ref post#honestly I'm like 98% sure they were sicced on me#and I know exactly by whom
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