#this is very specific to my own problems

[ivyblossom]

Lessons in Story: Ideas and their Shapes

I am currently working on a story that I intended to be a bog-standard structure that would fit the exact beats and timing of a 5 act story structure. That was what I wanted to write: a perfectly rule-abiding story. My goal was to write a story that works exactly the way stories are supposed to so I can learn how to do that. I don't think I should break rules I don't understand.

My long history with fanfiction has shaped how I think about ideas and story. For me, all story starts with characters and relationships and works outward from there. I see a lot of people who aspire to write building worlds to set their stories in, and then coming up with people for stories. I don't know how to do that. I find the people first, and then build a world they live in and the challenges they face based on who they are and the emotional journey they're on. I find worlds more malleable than people.

The nature of my interest in characters often has me generating reluctant protagonists. I learned long ago that a reluctant protagonist isn't a great thing, because a reader wants a protagonist to get what they want, and if what your character wants is to be left alone, that doesn't give you a very satisfying desire to fulfill. It leads to a character to whom the story happens rather than a character who drives the story, which is underwhelming. We don't want a story about things that happen to a person, we want people to shape their circumstances. I think all those years writing fanfiction have left me inclined to design stories that are narrative justifications for why a character does a thing you might not expect rather than constructing characters with a drive to do a thing. That might be a fatal flaw.

My goal is to recognize my deficits and make intentional, thoughtful decisions about these things instead of just running away on the tide of my own enthusiasm. So rather than let my reluctant protagonist function reluctantly, I have given her an environment and circumstances that radicalizes her into becoming an active force in her world. I don't know if it's enough.

I can already see that I broke a rule from the beginning by continuing forward with a reluctant protagonist. As I said, I find worlds more malleable than people. Maybe I shouldn't be writing about this girl!

I have learned that I have no clue what is too little, enough, or too much story. Because my focus is so much on character and emotional journeys, I always feel like there's insufficient story, even if there might actually be too much. By story here I mean action, plot points, external things. My fear is that I default to too few plot elements and too much self-indulgent interiority because I enjoy writing that so much.

I think this tendency also comes from writing lots of fanfiction. We don't really care all that much about plot (I mean, not really) and we love to just spend time with characters. I love that about us. But it means my gauge for this is really off.

I constructed a story that I thought felt thin in outline, so I kept playing with it, and then stuffed more in there, and then I got interested in a side character and wrote a whole other novel-length outline that's in a different genre altogether slapped it into the background of this story, thinking that at least it would feel like things are happening. That seemed like a good idea at the time, and in retrospect, that was me once again breaking rules I don't understand. So this story is already not the normal story I thought I was writing.

Now I think I have might too much going on and not enough space to process in between things, but I guess that remains to be seen. I have bad judgment about how much story a story has and I'm not sure how to remedy that yet.

I hope it's clear when I say "lessons in story" I mean the ones I'm learning and trying to learn and not any that I'm giving. I'm certainly not qualified to give lessons.

[luminique]

hii hii lumii !! I ADORE your interpretation of lighter so far— I love him smm

anyways, I hope my req is okay but I was wondering if you could do a comfort fic ? maybe reader has been a lil distant lately and just in some feels and he gives them a lil talk after being blown off here and there to find out they were having issues w their mental health and not feeling good enough and maybe he’s caught off guard because reader is usually so out going and always has a smile on their face and to see them feel so small makes him wanna take care of them so much and gives them so much reassurance and gentle kisses and cuddles 👉👈

I hope it’s okay !! I’ve been in the feels lately

hi anonn !! im gonna answer this one first because i've been in the feels too and i think we all deserve some reassurance, especially after all of the sad lighter story.

i don't take lighter for the kind to be too intrusive. that's not to say that he doesn't notice the way you're staring off into the distance, as if always having something on your mind. or the way you left earlier than usual for the SoC's nightly hangouts around the fire. or the way you had just been distancing yourself from him.

maybe you just needed a day, or two, and so he waited. he waited, and waited, but it just seemed like it was getting worse. he was beginning to get anxious, coming up with possibilities and worse case scenarios. even his favorite grape-flavored lollipop couldn't reduce the anxiety that was building up inside of him as he followed after you one night.

he shook off his nerves, spending quite a bit of time at the front door of your lodging while in blazewood. mentally practicing what to say so that he wouldn't make things even worse than they already were. one step, two deep breaths, three knocks on your door. he cleared his voice, usually confident and smooth but now carried a hint of worry in it.

"hey, uh... everything alright?"

you could hear the ruffling of his jacket, the soft metal clinks of his gloves. he didn't dare open the door until you allowed him to, so he waited, just like he always had. "lighter? yeah, everything's fine," was that a slight crack in your voice? no, no, he had to have imagined that. he knew it was wrong but he had waited long enough. he turned the knob, opening the door just a little bit but still not walking in.

"you don't have to tell me everything. just... know that i'll be here, waiting for you." he wasn't the best at comforting, nor was he good at even navigating these sorts of things but at the very least, he wanted you to have the knowledge that you had him. it didn't take long for you to finally get up, opening the door that separated the both of you. you looked so... different. the light absent from your eyes, the edges of your lips normally turned upwards but now they weren't. if he couldn't say what you wanted to hear, maybe you'd understand through his actions.

his arms wrapped around you. squeezing you just a little tighter than usual as he somehow made the both of you waddle backwards into your room. he had kept his gloves in his pants, not wanting to hurt you even more with them. his embrace was a familiar warmth, like the fire during particularly cold nights in the outer ring. you could hear his heart racing, was it from nervousness? anxiety? fear? even he didn't know.

he took this as an opportunity to place soft kisses on the top of your head but then stopped all of a sudden. he turned around to the door and realized that it was still wide open. he kicked it close with his foot, feeling embarrassed at the fact that he had to stop because of something so minor. he wanted you to feel safe, to have privacy, to be able to breathe without others barging in. technically, he had invaded this space of yours but you were slowly melting into him, as if you had been waiting for this too.

every passing second hugging you, kissing you, it made his own worries disappear. he hoped the same for you as you slowly spoke to him about your own problems. as he listened, he'd pause every once in while to give you a deadpan stare. not because he was making fun of you or anything, but it genuinely baffled him how you could say such things about yourself. you felt so insecure about yourself and your image, about being with him, being with the SoC. he had to physically stop himself from just blurting "i love you" every time you said something so degrading.

instead, he chose to wait and listen. his calloused hands gently caressing yours, his lips pressing kisses on the side of your head as you nuzzled into him. he loves you for who you are, the person in front of him, not the image that you had made yourself out to be in your mind. but he waits for you to let it all out before he says anything else. he will wait, he will listen, he will always be there for you.

[falconfate]

Hello ranger’s apprentice fandom can we talk real quick about the stupidest thing Flanagan ever wrote

It’s about the bows. Yanno, the rangers’ Iconique™️ main weapon. That one. You know the one.

Flanagan. Flanagan why are your rangers using longbows.

“uh well recurve arrows drop faster” BUT DO THEY. FLANAGAN. DO THEY.

the answer is no they don’t. Compared to a MODERN, COMPOUND (aka cheating) bow, yes, but compared to a longbow? Y’know, what the rangers use in canon? Yeah no a recurve actually has a FLATTER trajectory. It drops LATER.

This from an article comparing the two:

“Both a longbow and a recurve bow, when equipped with the right arrow and broadhead combination, are capable of taking down big game animals. Afterall, hunters have been doing it for centuries with both types of bows.

However, generally speaking and all things equal, a recurve bow will offer more arrow speed, creating a flatter flight trajectory and retain more kinetic energy at impact.

The archers draw length, along with the weight of the arrow also affect speed and kinetic energy. However, the curved design of the limbs on a recurve adds to its output of force.”

It doesn’t actually mention ANY distance in range! And this is from a resource for bow hunting, which, presumably, WOULD CARE ABOUT THAT SORT OF THING!

Okay so that’s just. That’s just the first thing.

The MAIN thing is that even accounting for “hur dur recurves drop faster” LONGBOWS ARE STILL THE STUPID OPTION.

Longbows, particularly and especially ENGLISH longbows, are—as their name suggests—very long. English longbows in particular are often as tall or taller than their wielder even while strung, but especially when unstrung. An unstrung longbow is a very long and expensive stick, one that will GLADLY entangle itself in nearby trees, other people’s clothes, and any doorway you’re passing through.

And yes, there are shorter longbows, but at that point if you’re shortening your longbow, just get a goddamn recurve. And Flanagan makes a point to compare his rangers’ bows to the Very Long English Longbow.

Oh, do you know how the Very Long English Longbow was mostly historically militarily used? BY ON-FOOT ARCHER UNITS. Do you know what they’re TERRIBLE for? MOUNTED ARCHERY.

Trust me. Go look up right now “mounted archery longbow.” You’ll find MAYBE one or two pictures of some guy on a horse struggling with a big stick; mostly you will actually see either mounted archers with RECURVES, or comparisons of Roman longbow archers to Mongolian horse archers (which are neat, can’t lie, I love comparing archery styles like that).

Anyway. Why are longbows terrible for mounted archery? Because they’re so damn long. Think about it: imagine you’re on a horse. You’re straddling a beast that can think for itself and moves at your command, but ultimately independently of you; if you’re both well-trained enough, you’re barely paying attention to your horse except to give it commands. And you have a bow in your hands. If your target is close enough to you that you know, from years of shooting experience, you will need to actually angle your bow down to hit it because of your equine height advantage, guess what? If you have a longbow, YOU CAN’T! YOUR HORSE IS IN THE WAY BECAUSE YOUR BOW IS TOO LONG! Worse, it’s probably going to get in the general area of your horse’s shoulder or legs, aka moving parts, which WILL injure your horse AND your bow and leave you fresh out of both a getaway vehicle and a ranged weapon. It’s stupid. Don’t do it.

A recurve, on the other hand, is short. It was literally made for horse archers. You have SO much range of motion with a recurve on horseback; and if you’re REALLY good, you know how to give yourself even more, with techniques like Jamarkee, a Turkish technique where you LITERALLY CAN AIM BACKWARDS.

For your viewing enjoyment, Serena Lynn of Texas demonstrating Jamarkee:

Yes, that’s real! This type of draw style is INCREDIBLY versatile: you can shoot backwards on horseback, straight down from a parapet or sally port without exposing yourself as a target, or from low to the ground to keep stealthy without banging your bow against the ground. And, while I’m sure you could attempt it with a longbow, I wouldn’t recommend it: a recurve’s smaller size makes it far more maneuverable up and over your head to actually get it into position for a Jamarkee shot.

A recurve just makes so much more SENSE. It’s not a baby bow! It’s not the longbow’s lesser cousin! It’s a COMPLETELY different instrument made to be used in a completely different context! For the rangers of Araluen, who put soooo much stock in being stealthy and their strong bonds with their horses, a recurve is the perfect fit! It’s small and easily transportable, it’s more maneuverable in combat and especially on horseback, it offers more power than a longbow of the same draw weight—really, truly, the only advantage in this case that a longbow has over the recurve is that longbows are quicker and easier to make. But we KNOW the rangers don’t care about that, their KNIVES use a forging technique (folding) that takes several times as long as standard Araluen forging practices at the time!

Okay.

Okay I think I’m done. For now.

[al-luviec]

still haven't moved on from zane in this episode (aka I hit tag limit again and am unhappy about it)

[sammygender]

so many people can’t conceptualise emotional neglect as anything other than ‘my parents were cold and distant and never talked about feelings with me’, and this, while being just a general awful problem of course, is also what leads to so much john winchester mischaracterisation. in this essay i will

[miodiodavinci]

i saw that you used to hint at oc stuff on twitter (don't ask me why im digging im looking for zola stuff lmao) why don't you post more about them?

i am simply terrified that if i post oc things online someone will steal the concept and run with it faster and better than i ever could have and then i will be devastated forever and ever

more seriously i have very little to show for any of my oc things (adhd brain making life difficult as per usual awawawawawa) and every time i've shared oc things in the past i've ended up never following up on it and it makes me feel bad and guilty so i've just convinced myself i will Never talk about my ocs until i have something substantial i can put out there

[forcedhesitation]

that one bozo who made the gender swapped dame aylin mod: it's unrealistic for minorities to exist in this game because it's supposed to take place in medieval europe!!!!

aasimar, vampires, devils, and dragons aside....

bg3:

[feral-aether]

Debated for a long while making physical feather refs for my own wings and how they look, but the thing is that they aren't always the same. They tend to shift day to day depending on a variety of things, not last of which are my interests at that time lol. A usual trigger for change is also music 'cause it's just so deeply part of me so it makes sense; as well as some emotions lol

Anyways, here's a list I drew up with the most common bases at the top and some others that have stronger visualizations towards the bottom lol

Fully aware I maybe should have shifted the Eagle and Owl as Hawks and Owls tend to be my default birds, but it's already been written in pen lol

Also, that bit in quotations is often how the visualizations come through in my head. That one in particular is for my Matron and Patron deities, of which I'm gonna do a pair for 'cause that feels better than doing just one. Plus then, I can add little elements from both into the other, largely with colours and little design bits but yeah lol. I have already drawn up bases for the first several here

And props to anyone who can guess the Matron and Patron deity from the colours and description alone lol

[j-esbian]

i lost the post but i saw someone talking about how some of y’all act like being weird is a choice and like. YEAHHHHHHH.

that’s fine, it might be for you. but i just live like this and don’t know any other way. like yeah i’ve worked customer service, i can do innocuous small talk, but anything beyond that, i don’t understand what i’m missing. and it’s frustrating to see the tonal disconnect especially from people who are like “uwu embrace weirdness!!” where they’re like. dressing quirky and talking about bugs and listening to obscure music and eschewing small talk to ask Deep Questions on the first date and unlearning their tendency to not infodump. and generally have an idea of what Weirdness is supposed to look like. idk man some of us wake up and get out of bed and can’t figure out why the rest of their coworkers chitchat with each other but when they join the conversation it dies.

weirdness is value neutral. let’s stop trying to turn it into a badge because quite frankly, it’s not a choice for everyone. it’s fucking exhausting to never be on the same wavelength as other people and they’re going to react the way they do and label you the way they will without any conscious actions on your end. it’s difficult to talk about this without feeling like you’ll be dismissed as immature, a teenager whining “no one understands me” but the thing is. sometimes you don’t grow out of feeling alone and different, and there’s no good way to talk about it without feeling like people will think you’re just fishing for pity.

[sysig]

Wander-ful! (Patreon)

[bumblingbabooshka]

On the topic of Harry and Kes being proteges to Janeway and Tuvok respectively - both of them developing mommy/daddy issues despite having perfectly normal and healthy relationships with their parents.

[thedoubteriswise]

it's always weird to me when people talk about celebrities like "did we all just forget about what he did?" "ugh well what do you expect from a guy like that" "I can't believe people are still defending her" like am I supposed to know what you're talking about. I couldn't pick 70% of these people out of a lineup if they had a neon sign identifying them hanging over their heads. how do you all just know about every single one of their crimes

[burinazar]

:( patheticposting

nearly literally reduced to tears rn by how overwhelmingly it feels like nobody cares what I make or like or think about and how meaningless any of my creativity and love and effort is

[bmpmp3]

dysgraphic artiƨts risɘ UP!!!!!

[moe-broey]

Wwhy did I get hit w the infinite nightmare loop last night. Triandra girl are you mad at me 😢😥

[loregoddess]

Nintendo will do whatever the hell they'll do with the next LoZ game, but I hope for the sake of my sanity the name scheme goes back to two or less words. My decision to type out the full names of the games for my tagging system really sucks for the two games with four words in each of their titles.