#this is very specific to my interests anyway

[mrmeepsmadmind]

i love when ppl draw bumblebee like the happy little creachure he is but also i love when people draw bumblebee like he's had 500 beers in the last 1 hour and still the pain won't even ebb

[celtrist]

This was a planned thing I had around the time I had this little rant (appreciate everyone who's bothered reading that thank you!)

Seeing as we have three canonically Asexual characters, I thought each of them having a different romantic orientation (and varying asexuality on the scale) would be fun and neat to show the variations to the orientations! But I was really stumped on Mammon since I was pretty set on Alastor and Octavia, but Mammon not being any form of aromantic didn't feel right, not terribly ooc, just definitely felt a bit more like "he's the leftovers" sort of thing when divvying up the romantic orientations. But lo and behold, the new episode of Helluva came out and helped solved that little quandrie. So here are my thoughts below on each!

Alastor (Loveless Aromantic) If you've seen my rant, you probably have a good idea why I labeled him as a "loveless aromantic" (meaning in this sense I'm talking about, he just wouldn't have any form of romantic affections or go into something like a QPR or the like). And I do genuinely think he would be! But I know there's A LOT of bias for Alastor NOT being aromantic (or at least open to some sort of relationship), and I will admit I might've been a bit biased here too! I've just seen a lot of love for only specific parts of the aro spectrum that "allows" Alastor to get with someone, and I wanted to give some love to the aro spectrum that gets little to no appreciation (plus I do just genuinely think he'd be this). If you don't agree, all is fair ദ്ദി（• ˕ •マ.ᐟ The point is, I realize I'm probably in the minority here. Plus, it's all a guessing game more or less until something is officially stated, which probably will never happen for any of these three.

Anyway, like I said, I just don't see Alastor really getting as close to anyone even as a QPR. At the VERY LEAST, not in a QPR that has a lot of romantic parts to it (kissing on the lips, cuddling, etc.). My man wouldn't have any interest in marriage or anything romantic, he's very happy on his own and probably gossips about OTHER people's love lives. Then again, he seemed pretty close to cracking when he heard Charlie ranting about her own love life... With that said, I do think he DOES like the company of others, he's VERY social after all. But actually, getting intimate with someone? Mmm, that doesn't feel right for him to me. A kiss on the cheek or PERHAPS a cuddle here and there at most, but nothing like bathing with someone or kissing with tongue. He's also a man of the roaring twenties, so you KNOW how he thinks about intimacies that might have no romantic/sexual connotations by themselves (like bathing with someone) are romantic on their own just because being that close to someone was seen that way in his time. Plus again, I just don't think he'd be interested in that stuff as is (potentially he could be both touch-starved and touch-aversed. And oh boy, wouldn't that be a conundrum!) On one hand, I like and can see Alastor being sex-repulsed, on the other I can also see him just feeling nothing towards it. Considering Angel's "advances" in both the first episode and the pilot, he does have a bit of a strong reaction towards sex, but nothing crazy either. I can see him being lukewarm to the subject (so he could read a book or read a script out loud with sex in it), but he could be repulsed when it actually INVOLVES HIM. I can definitely see him somewhat annoyed with the subject for how everywhere it is though.

Octavia (QPR Aromantic) It's a little hard to pinpoint, but I can personally see Octavia getting into a close QPR sooner than Alastor, but maaayybe only be a hair. Octavia could possibly get into a platonic relationship with someone that would have remnants of seeming romantic. I do think she's probably the most sex-repulsed of the three, if in part because of her father's inclinations that he doesn't seem to hide even when she's around. Honestly, I feel like we still haven't seen enough of her to get a good grasp on this aspect of her character in if she would be interested in getting as close as to a QPR with someone. But I'd certainly like to think so, because damn does our girl need it. Her falling into some sort of relationship would probably be hard seeing as how her parents' relationship was so awful. So she could be hesitant about doing something like that.

Mammon He was the big toughy! And while his advances on Leviathan might have been meant in a more platonic way or just for show to go against Ozzy's and Bee's romantic relations, I'm going with what's there! So Mammon seems like he could be straight or bi/pan. But I don't have a hard grasp on which so I'm tossing that in the air. I don't think he'd be sex-repulsed just because of how "sex makes money". Like, there's no question that sex appeal is a big part of business even if something isn't even that sexual. So while I think he's not largely interested in doing anything sexual, I can see him being okay or even lukewarm to the subject, maybe just not getting the appeal entirely. Maaaayybe he's sex-favorable? Of the three I would imagine he would be the most likely to be sex-favorable, but I dunno.

I like the idea of Octavia being the only one aware as to what her orientations are. Alastor is... well he's Alastor, and Mammon doesn't seem like he'd be too interested in the details of things. Just that "there's straight, gay, and the between area".

[archivists-decay]

I've been playing Great God Grove from @limbolanegames over and over again recently (If you're seeing this, go give @yugsly and @daylane some serious love! It's a wonderful experience) and I have a very tiny headcanon that the ascended gods actually have very little influence over the world in the traditional "god power" sense.

Some story and ending spoilers under the cut.

My headcanon is that they have some influence, like Miss Mitternacht's crying leading to flooding, Cobigail's vines (which, I'm not entirely sure were even intentional to begin with,) but rather, the benefit of Godhood comes from being given immortality (read: an infinite amount of time to further develop a skill) and notoriety (read: everyone believing you are THE subject matter expert of the namesake you embody).

When Bauhauzzo talks about being only being able to assist you in BuzzHuzz with his voice, I don't think that's just because he's "only" the God of Memory – I think it's because that's about the extent of their greater influence as gods.

Their eternity spent honing their crafts makes their opinions on the subjects infallible to the people - even if we know they aren't.

Click Clack's last few scripts have been terrible? Well, we think they suck, but we have to get them to post anyways – he sees something we don't.

Bauhauzzo wants innovation banned from BuzzHuzz? Seems out of character, but he's remembering something we don't.

Their voices, or what the people believe are their voices, are listened to with reverence when it comes to their field of mastery — and I think that's one of the reasons King might have said some things to Inspekta that he interpreted as "disrespectful."

In the 30+ years of his godhood, Inspektas ideas of Leadership have clearly severely regressed from his time as a human – mostly due to his insecurities, granted – but he didn't spend any of that time polishing up what leadership meant, or helping others grow in their own leadership, instead, resting on his laurels of being adored and keeping his men down so that they continually lift him up. King probably caught on to this and tried to have a heart to heart with him, one that just...was poorly received.

My headcanon makes me think that, tragically, Inspekta had the potential to become one of the most influential and beloved gods in the grove overtime anyways if he had spent as much time working on his genuine leadership as he had plotting and being envious of the others. Not being tied down to a specific location in the grove, having a loyal group of activists willing to spread his ideas about leadership, on top of his skillset being just, a really good general aptitude that anyone can benefit from. Just some thoughts.

Addendum: Also, I think it's interesting that it almost seems like mortals have more power over the pantheon in this Universe. Sure, the gods close the rift, but the rest of the time? Mortals can exile (Huzzle Mug), abandon (Cobigail was left alone for 20 YEARS), and twist the words and intentions (Pretty much everyone) of the gods like it's nothing with very little consequences from the gods themselves — it's a refreshing approach to a fictional mythology and something I'd like to see explored more in fiction.

Anyways, thanks for letting me ramble! I've been thinking about these silly queers all week.

[rootspiral]

hi, hello!! i absolutely adore your deep dive series into the aaa episodes, and i was wondering if you could/would feel like expanding further into agatha’s guilt towards wanda and all the emotion she shows in the first episode, when she sees wanda’s corpse? the way agnes seems to value human life is especially interesting to me, considering how much agatha has killed (and i understand agnes is a character in what’s supposed to be a very stereotypical detective series, but i remember how you said agnes is in some ways agatha at her most transparent). anyways, i thought i’d try to pick your brain a little more on the subject, because your takes are very interesting to me!

Hi hello to you, thank you for stopping by! And also thank you for your interesting question, consider my brain officially picked. I'm gonna ramble QUITE a bit because I want to talk about Agatha and misogyny first (as requested by @leoleolovesdc ) but hold in there, I'll get to wanda too.

To get to the point directly, I think that Agatha's actions are steeped in internalized misogyny, and I think it's something she inherited from her mother and the salemites. It's actually pretty common for marginalized communities or individuals to turn against their own and replicate the patterns of the oppressor, looking to ease their self-hatred or for outside acceptance or a sense of control. Think for example about super conservative wives voting against their best interests, think about all the homophobia and biphobia and transphobia and acephobia (etcetera etcetera ad infinitum) in the queer community.

The persecution of witches was essentially a war on a kind of womanhood that went against imposed gender norms. Witches (in the marvel universe and in real life) were more often than not women who lived independently, who knew herbs, who didn't marry, who worked as midwives etc. And talking about the salemites specifically and the way they treated Agatha: they did to Agatha what the external world did to them, they replicated a pattern. They targeted the odd one out, the woman in their group who was the most different, and called her evil and essentially tried to burn her at the stake.

We don't know a thing about evanora, but I would BET that a lot of her hatred stems from her own internalized misogyny / agatha being born female, and I honestly wonder if Agatha would have found it harder to love a daughter the same way she does Nicky or Billy, without any of her internalized bias kicking in. Since she was a kid Agatha had been hurt and persecuted by other witches, she's pretty much wired to mistrust and hate them. And it gets even more muddled and complicated because she hates witches but loves witchcraft, she hates women but is sexually and romantically attracted to them. She yearns to belong, but she ends up torturing and killing her own community. She allies with people like that disgusting prick who violated Jen.

Enter Wanda, who is essentially Agatha 2.0: she was born doomed by the narrative or, to say it like evanora, she was born evil. Evanora would have had a FIELD DAY with Wanda. The Scarlet Witch? The destroyer of universes? She would have tried to kill her on the spot. There is A LOT Agatha instinctively hates in Wanda, she's a woman, she's a witch, she's dangerous. Agatha does what the salemites did to her and what men did to witches: she replicates a pattern. She punishes Wanda for being too alone and too different and complicated and scary. And yes Agatha is doing it to get her hands on chaos magic and all that comes with that, but this is all the baggage she brings in.

There's the other side of the coin: Agatha hates women and witches, Agatha loves women and witches, and Agatha hates and loves Wanda. She's been essentially killing and running away for the past two centuries, refusing to dwell on the consequences of her actions, but we know that she is no unfeeling psychopath, that's just a role she plays. We know all her actions weigh on her. With Wanda that sense of guilt is even stronger because Wanda is not a random witch she kills and abandons in the woods, she has to live with her and witness all of Wanda's pain up close, how lonely she is, how scared she is, the grief of losing Pietro and Vision, it's all there to torment Agatha. She cannot be a child about it, she can't close her eyes and cover her ears and go lalala until it's over, she has to take it all in order to get what she wants. And what's worse, Wanda is so similar to her that Agatha can picture exactly what she's feeling down to her bones, that's empathy to the max. And she goes through with her plan and does horrible things to Wanda anyway.

Knowing Agatha like we know her now, I'm convinced that her guilt about Wanda is especially hard to deal with, but Agatha has always refused to deal with any of her inner struggles, so Wanda just goes on the pile together with all the painful and complicated feelings she's pointedly ignoring, and which are not haunting her at all, thank you very much!

Except when she's Agnes, because all the feeling are still there but she doesn't know where they come from. I'd say that more than transparent Agnes is unfiltered, she doesn't know she should censor her struggles like Agatha does. Based on Agnes, we can plainly see what the biggest issues on her Inner Pile of Shit and Sorrow are: grief over Nicky's loss, anger and yearning for Rio, extreme loneliness, and guilt over those she hurt, with a particular emphasis on Wanda.

[eddiegettingshot]

Tbh I was radicalized this summer when you said we have progressed past the need for eddie therapy spec and fics. i havent read a single one since and probably wont again and my life has been so peaceful since… he literally does not need that. He just needs to feel secure and open with his feelings, needs to let people love him fully, and maybe some grief counselling/a support group to go to occasionally. If frank was going to help with that he would have in s3. (no offence to people who write/read therapy fics Im sure they are wonderful and profound and frank is actually good at his job in them)

helpppp good. thank you for giving me an excuse to talk about my beloathed therapy eddie because i think it’s so so so funny that after 8x06 the predictable response was that eddie needs to go to therapy. which i feel like there are soooo many things happening on both the character and the story level. like what’s funny is that frank really could not be a good therapist on screen because that’s not interesting tv. i’m not a therapist but i imagine that in fear-o-phobia he should have probably like. worked with eddie to decide on who he’d try to contact, figure out how the conversation might go, work on coping strategies, etc. but obviously eddie had to blow up. it’s funny because all of the other presumably “good” work frank does is completely off screen. because it’s uninteresting. so eddie wouldn’t have the kind of therapy arc people think he should have anyway, it’s quite literally just something people demand because they need a virtue signal that eddie is “trying” (and of course therapy is the only picture of “trying to heal”). the fact that he’s growing and dealing with stuff outside of therapy is like, not acceptable i guess? i think it’s also funny that as far as fic goes eddie is pretty much always in therapy but it is truly once in a blue moon that we see buck or really any other character talk about therapy.

anyway on the character level. obviously people who relate to eddie’s experience might find therapy really useful but i am not talking about real people i’m talking about a character who is fake. something that is very funny and interesting to me is that in the fear-o-phobia scene eddie is pretty much being resistant and mean and a bitch the whole time but when frank says “you can’t put all your feelings in a box eddie because someday it’ll blow up” and eddie literally already knows what’s going on (“…and take me with it”). actually eddie pretty much always knows what’s going on when he’s having issues it’s just he packs it all down. so seeing a character like this do the internal pathologized work of therapy with just. A Therapist. is… soooo boring to me. it’s funny because i do think frank was right. like in the end i think it’s sort of indicated that eddie is not only feeling this survivor’s guilt/pointlessness but that he also fears he’s going to end up like all the other people who share his pain. so he does need that sort of external pathway to dealing with his issues, like… exactly what you said… leaning on the people in his life… loving them and letting them love him… perhaps a support group or volunteering or whatever… in terms of an actual story these things are soooo much cooler and more fun than what therapy stuff can offer eddie specifically (like… strategies? identifying various cognitive distortions? idk). because he’s already a character who’s always in his head… it’s so much better. To Me. to see him work through things in other ways. such as by talking to a gay priest.

[destinygoldenstar]

TRAILERRRRRR!!!!!

Okay, so Netflix DIDN'T lie. Confirmed.

I'm NOT as scared about the release date as others. I'm still worried. But I can also see it because from what I've heard, Episodes 2-4 were being made around the same time. So, by that logic, the quality should be similar.

"But why was there such a gap with 2 & 3 then?" MURDER DRONES WAS RELEASING ITS FINALE IN BETWEEN. THAT'S WHY. Some of the animators for Digital Circus work on Murder Drones too. So OF COURSE, to avoid overworking them, there'd be a gap for Digital Circus content.

And now that Murder Drones has ended, there's not that issue anymore.

That's the logic I'm going with, anyway. I would wait to raise the red flags till AFTER this episode comes out and we hear Episode 5 comes out in, like, a month or something.

I HOPE TO GOD THAT LINE AGES HORRIBLY.

Also, um... an episode about working minimum wage labor.

These episodes are built for me, I swear.

We also have the characters in different outfits, which is neat. Clearly just for this episode. Still.

I NOTICED THIS POSTER.

"Customer is always right! Serve with a smile!"

THE AMOUNT OF TIMES I HAVE BEEN TOLD THIS IS INSANE AND DRIVES ME ABSOLUTELY NUTS.

I WOULD GET SCOFFED AT AND SCREAMED AT BY PEOPLE, AND I'M THE ONE THAT GETS IN TROUBLE.

We also have Ragatha and Gangle interacting.

I wonder why they're playing with a baseball specifically.

Because in the last episode the leisure activity played into the adventure.

JAX'S NAMETAG SAYS "I DON'T CARE"

LMAO

Gangle looks like she's been possessed by Monokuma.

This is DEFINATELY a new mask.

Here's my prediction:

Gangle has a background actress-related. (Comedy & Tragedy Mask Duality) And she is bullied CONSTANTLY in the previous episodes.

So when she's given the role of manager, she creates a new mask for herself, A NEW CHARACTER. One that gives her confidence and a character so ruthless that she can't be pushed around.

It's her spotlight. It's her time to shine.

So is the comedy&tragedy duality bipolar disorder?

We'll see. I got Kinger's mental issue wrong.

It could also be that Gangle is autistic. I KNOW AS AN AUTISTIC PERSON MYSELF. It's pretty easy for autistic people to latch onto a character they can bring to life in order to interact with people. But when provoked as themselves, confidence can easily break.

So no, I don't think she's being psychotic. I think she's putting on an act for her self esteem.

And I think whatever damage she causes in the episode will not have malicious intent from her.

I say this because we ALSO see her looking at herself in the mirror.

THIS IS ZOOBLE'S ROOM BTW. THAT'S INTERESTING.

Did Zooble loan Gangle this?

Assuming they did because we have THIS hand reach out to Gangle.

So what I'm thinking the start of the episode is: Gangle and Ragatha are playing baseball, by accident, the ball breaks Gangle's masks.

She's crying, she's writing, and then Zooble eavesdrops and offers to help.

And we know this is Zooble's hand because they're participating in the adventure with that hand.

YAY!

This guy is so stiffly animated. Or maybe it's just me.

Maybe there's a story reason for it. Idk.

They advertised this guy awhile back, said "He's everyone's favorite character".

I'm calling Glitch's bluff. I'm gonna say this guy is going to be VERY INTENTIONALLY written to be UNLIKEABLE, ANNOYING, AND MISERABLE.

And it's gonna be COMEDY GOLD to have Caine and the Circus go around exclaiming how he's the best.

CAINE GETTING THIS SUGGESTION BOX IS SO INTERESTING.

I THINK this is from Zooble.

After their therapy session, and Zooble saw first hand what could happen if Caine cuts adventures altogether, I can see Zooble making adventure suggestions that would be comfortable for them to participate in. To please Caine and to protect the circus from collapsing.

We're also getting Caine lore. BECAUSE WHERE IS THIS ROOM SUPPOSED TO BE? THIS LOOKS FAR TOO NORMAL.

AND WHAT IS POMNI DOING HERE CRAWLING ON THE FLOOR?

First off, I'm okay with her taking a backseat. She's the main character so obviously she'd get the lionshare of screen time. BUT there are other characters in this show and the show knows that. So as a Pomni Stan, I'm completely okay with this.

BUT is she snooping on Caine???

Two possibilities: One, this is just the burger place. Which is likely.

OR this is where Caine is, and she dips from the adventure to eavesdrop and figures out some lore stuff.

Not seeing her doing much else this episode anyway.

CAUSE LOOK AT THIS. SHE'S TRYING TO THROW AWAY SOMETHING AND GETS CAUGHT BY GANGLE? SHE HIDING S&#T DOG.

THE GLOINK QUEEN IS BACK.

Probably as just a cameo. BUT THE GLOINK QUEEN IS BACK.

Hmmmm... if the Gloink Queen is coming back, I wonder if someone else could show up...

[geraldmariaivo]

I’m like 95% sure that I’m autistic, though undiagnosed. While I absolutely experienced a lot of these, I found the communication barrier less extreme. Mostly for three reasons.

1) as a smallish child I devoured books, and my parents encouraged my reading, so they just chucked thicker and thicker books at me. And my dad has a lot of old fantasy books. Between that and my later consumption of really long fanfics online, my childhood-adolescent vocabulary exploded with big words that older people know, and mean very specific things.

2) My parents watched lots of detective and private investigator shows (think Elementary and Person of Interest). These shows had smart characters who used big words, lots of words, spoke calmly, and very importantly- got their points across in a way that I understood very clearly, and the other characters understood as they walked through their explanations. None of them were particularly good at socializing, but they could convey information.

3) growing up, my dad and especially my uncle (my dad’s older brother, and an engineer) were the single most pedantic people I knew, and they would argue semantics into the ground. I know for a fact that my uncle is autistic (undiagnosed, but trust me there’s no way he’s not), and he had the most literal mindset ever. He was the kind of guy who drilled into me to never say “always” unless I genuinely meant “every single solitary instance.” He’s loosened up with age, but my god it was so stressful to talk to him as a child. Between him and my dad, I had to figure out how to piece together sentences so there was no possible way it could be misconstrued or used against me, because anything that could be, would be.

I ended up absorbing the speech patterns, and paired it with my vocabulary to make what I said as air-tight as possible. (Example: if someone asked “Did [X] do [Y]?” and you’re 98% sure they didn’t, normal answer is “No.” or “I don’t think so.” What I had learned to say in middle school was “To the best of my knowledge, [X] didn’t do [Y], though I haven’t asked them about it recently, so you might need to.”

Unfortunately I now have the opposite problem. In the words of Red from OSP: “Why use one word, when fifteen will do!” Which also sometimes (but much less often) results in people not knowing what the fuck I’m talking about because I explained it in too much detail. This usually happens when someone is sleep deprived, extra stressed, or uninterested in what I’m saying anyway. Ironically, my dad is the one who complains about it the most, telling me that I sound weird, and need to learn how to talk like a normal person. Meanwhile my uncle is like “Ah, yes. I can understand what you’re saying perfectly.”

Funnily enough I’ll sometimes use internet shorthand when something is obvious enough that I can be confident that the person I’m talking to can extrapolate the meaning, but it ends up with me say things like “Honestly the Generation 1 Transformers theme songs are funny to me. They clearly didn’t really know what they were doing. The every season’s theme was different, and all of them had disorganized music and vocals. None of them were particularly coherent, and half the time you wouldn’t be able to tell what genre the show was by listening to it if it wasn’t for the fact that they slapped a computer-y sounding filter over the voice lines because robots.”

ironically, my dad, one of the main reasons that i Talk Like That, tells me that i have the weirdest speech patterns. It’s not particularly derogatory, but every time he does it reminds me that he knows has gained the trust of zero autistic people under the age of forty because of his boomer-ass nonsense, because every autistic person under the age of forty that I’ve met who’s heard me speak like that almost immediately dropped the mask and started using their own patchwork speech patterns. (Yes i know all naturally occurring speech patterns are patchwork due to social mirroring and the like.)

I realized the other day that the reason I didn't watch much TV as a teenager (and why I'm only now catching up on late aughts/early teens media that I missed), is because I literally didn't understand how to use our TV. My parents got a new system, and it had three remotes with a Venn diagram of functions. If someone left the TV on an unfamiliar mode, I didn't know how to get back to where I wanted to be, so I just stopped watching TV on my own altogether.

I explained all this to my therapist, because I didn't know if this was more related to my then-unnoticed autism, or to my relationship with my parents at the time (we had issues less/unrelated to neurodivergency). She told me something interesting.

In children's autism assessments, a common test is to give them a straightforward task that they cannot reasonably perform, like opening an overtight jar. The "real" test is to see, when they realize that they cannot do it on their own, if they approach a caregiver for help. Children that do not seek help are more likely to be autistic than those that do.

This aligns with the compulsory independence I've noticed to be common in autistic adults, particularly articulated by those with lower support needs and/or who were evaluated later in life. It just genuinely does not occur to us to ask for help, to the point that we abandon many tasks that we could easily perform with minor assistance. I had assumed it was due to a shared common social trauma (ie bad experiences with asking for help in the past), but the fact that this trait is a childhood test metric hints at something deeper.

My therapist told me that the extremely pathologizing main theory is that this has something to do with theory of mind, that is doesn't occur to us that other people may have skills that we do not. I can't speak for my early childhood self, or for all autistic people, but I don't buy this. Even if I'm aware that someone else has knowledge that I do not (as with my parents understanding of our TV), asking for help still doesn't present itself as an option. Why?

My best guess, using only myself as a model, is due to the static wall of a communication barrier. I struggle a lot to make myself understood, to articulate the thing in my brain well enough that it will appear identically (or at least close enough) in somebody else's brain. I need to be actively aware of myself and my audience. I need to know the correct words, the correct sentence structure, and a close-enough tone, cadence, and body language. I need draft scripts to react to possible responses, because if I get caught too off guard, I may need several minutes to construct an appropriate response. In simple day-to-day interactions, I can get by okay. In a few very specific situations, I can excel. When given the opportunity, I can write more clearly than I am ever capable of speaking.

When I'm in a situation where I need help, I don't have many of my components of communication. I don't always know what my audience knows. I don't have sufficient vocabulary to explain what I need. I don't know what information is relevant to convey, and the order in which I should convey it. I don't often understand the degree of help I need, so I can come across inappropriately urgent or overly relaxed. I have no ability to preplan scripts because I don't even know the basic plot of the situation.

I can stumble though with one or two deficiencies, but if I'm missing too much, me and the potential helper become mutually unintelligible. I have learned the limits of what I can expect from myself, and it is conceptualized as a real and physical barrier. I am not a runner, so running a 5k tomorrow does not present itself as an option to me. In the same way, if I have subconscious knowledge that an interaction is beyond my capability, it does not present itself as an option to me. It's the minimum communication requirements that prevent me from asking for help, not anything to do with the concept of help itself.

Maybe. This is the theory of one person. I'm curious if anyone else vibes with this at all.

[redux-iterum]

Sometimes I just have to reread and reread and take in how you’ve written Fireheart because it’s just so…

He’s just so good. So genuinely and unceasingly good. He cares so much and more than that he’s wise. Sometimes a character will say something and I go ‘there’s no way to comfort someone about this’ and then five minutes after that Fireheart says something wise that makes me rethink some shit that I, a real life human, am doing. Which is hard! This is harder to write convincingly than a strong character, because a character like Fireheart whose greatest strength is his heart HAS to follow through. And he has to be genuinely emotionally intelligent in a way that can’t just be, like, told. It has to be shown. And you manage to show that to us flawlessly, constantly, and consistently.

Like, man. No wonder everyone loves this guy. I love this guy. Absolute favorite version of Fireheart that I have EVER read.

Also, follow-up, Cloudpaw’s situation. You managed to make it not kind of infuriating, you found a reason for what he was doing that honestly broke my heart, and you did it all so naturally I’m still reeling over it. And then you managed to have Fireheart make an argument so convincing without contradicting the beliefs that he already has (ie: he’s not a xenophobe) and it just. Man. I hadn’t even thought of come of that stuff. I’ll be honest, I remember reading the original series and thinking it was morally neutral for Cloudpaw to go eat kittypet food, and now I’m rethinking it!

It IS rude to steal food. It IS rude to feed yourself in a way you can’t share with the people you love who are in constant threat of starvation. I always thought of it as a practical way to feed himself that didn’t take from his clanmates but…it isn’t fair, is it? It’s not fair at all for him to do that. Most of the argument in the original series felt like ‘OTHER CULTURE BAD AND WRONG AND YOU WRONG FOR PART IN IT’ and it made me kind of side with Cloudpaw out of sheer spite. But this is so much better! Actual arguments! And REASONS! That make sense for why these kitty people are doing what they do and thinking how they think!

We always say the Erins were two steps to the left of greatness with these battlecats. I think they were actually two miles away, because they have never provided the characterization they need. I think they were two miles away because the premise is great, sure, and they can handle plot but they are incapable of making these cats feel like the people they are. The Warriors Clans in the original never felt like a community because every individual never felt like a living person and I think that’s a problem much farther than two steps away from greatness.

Anyways, all of this is to say: You’re doing great work and thank you for this latest update! I’ve been trying to comment more lately :D Share thoughts and stuff.

I absolutely adore these long, analytical asks. Thank you for this, and for so many compliments!

Fireheart is such a fun little guy to write specifically for his goodness, and how everyone around him interacts with that. It's not often that I get to handle a character as dedicated to compassion and love as him. His entire being is based around "I care" - that's something even his mother doesn't have, and she's the matriarch. There are a couple unique challenges to this that'll come along in the future, so I won't say anything here, but I am very interested to see how you feel about one of the last chapters in this book.

As for Cloudpaw, thank GOD I avoided the annoying aspect of it. His behavior and subplot in the books aggravated me to no end for a variety of reasons that I won't get into here, so I put a lot of work into justifying why he would do that in this version. With Fireheart's explanation of why stealing kittypet food is wrong, as well, I remember sitting down for a long moment with myself and slowly knitting together exactly why Fireheart would not approve of humoring kittypet stuff like that, when he's got the most understanding of that life out of anyone in the Clans. The fairness struck me, and that was his reason. The Clans definitely refuse wet food out of pride and discrimination first and foremost, and don't bother explaining it to kits beyond that, but if someone overheard Fireheart talking to Cloudpaw, they'd snap their fingers, point at him and go, "Exactly! Yes! That!" He managed to put into words a concept that the Clans subconsciously understand but don't really analyze to themselves.

For the Erins: honestly, yes, I agree. I could go on for YEARS about the characterizations and lack thereof in the books (someone remind me to rant about that at some point), and how much of the story could be so much greater and more natural if everyone had a consistent, present personality. And, honestly, that's what was the most wrong about the original Redux - no personalities for anyone. I spend a LOT of time stewing over the characters of everyone written in Iterum to make up for that. It brings me great joy to hear that my work has paid off!

[shootingstarrfish]

I’m falling back into this fandom, help me when did we get new characters? When did mepho get a body? Who is Raphael and 13?

to be honest i haven't been around long enough to know when it happened, maybe someone who's been around longer can reply with that answer! and welcome back to the fandom, what a time to fall back into it hahaha no time like the present though

but thirteen is a reaper who is also solomon's biggest hater (solomon is entirely unaware as to why), she takes an interest in MC because their soul is shiny and beautiful and she's very intrigued and she wants their soul badly. ironically this is the same reason she initially took an interest in solomon but his soul doesnt look like that anymore according to her and she's salty about it she likes playing pranks on people, she lives in a cave full of curses that even she doesn't fully know about, and she has an older sister named candy who she's supposedly afraid of/avoids?

raphael is an angel, the youngest angel to achieve seraphim status specifically. he's described as a hitman but we dont see him doing a lot of hitman-ing to be honest, but we know his weapon of choice is a spear and he can summon a rain of spears! he likes solomons atrocious cooking and he sews, he's really deadpan and will help out with things but kinda begrudgingly and i'm convinced if he ever got a canon sin it would've been sloth he essentially kinda just has to play along with michael's every whim and demand and bro is TIRED but he can't do much about it

it's also definitely canon that he likes hedgehogs and he definitely canonically has a pet hedgehog and it's very canon and true, john solmare is my uncle and he told me so

anyway mephi 13 and raphael were apparently initially intended to be dateable eventually but that never happened and probably never will now but alas :,) i was actually dating raphael all along in my heart

[mythmerth]

fluff vs feel good merlin fics…?

It has come to my attention from my last post with the ask about a long fluffy merlin fic that I, perhaps, do not know how to separate the definition of fluff from my own definition of feel good fics. When I think of fluff I tend to think of lovey dovey feel good hehe type of fics. HOWEVER, my definition of feel good may be different than other people and thus may not actually BE fluff…. oops!

In order to make up for this I’m gonna list off more merlin fics that I consider to be on a “fluff — feel good” scale, but first I’ll give my own interpretation of “fluff” and “feel good” so you know what to expect!

— When I think of the definition of fluff, I think of things very lighthearted, low stakes, very lovey, being emotionally and PG physically intimate (soft), playful in a sweet way, and generally just not really having the highs and lows of angsty fics.

— When I categorize something as feel good it tends to be not very stressful, minimal angst, quickly resolved/humorous relationship issues, powerful characters, has a hopeful tone/no doubts about a happy ending, makes me laugh multiple times, and high in emotional and physical intimacy (and yes I am a Smut Enthusiast). Some feel goods have more or less of these than others for me but that’s what the scale in my head is weighing them on.

that being said, to the best of my ability here is the list ranked from fluff to feel good merlin fics! fluff fics are often a lot shorter than the plotty ones (but I tried to throw some longer ones in as well that I’d consider to have a good amount of fluff BUT these also tend to have more angst so you’ve been warned)

fluff

Twitch Your Whiskers and Pull My Tail by BlueSimplicity. Soft, sweet bonding, a bit silly

The Great Merlin Bake-off by Elizabeth. Long, low stakes, silly, so many pastries

Merlin Myrddin the Muralist by deanpendragon. So touching, very soft, strong and healing bonds

Nobody Expected Uther to Approve So Damn Hard by Nakyrah. Silly, soft, quick developing relationship

Tales of Magic by amithia. Soft, developing relationships, gentle magic/love

I know why the birds sing your name by ironfamjam. Long, hopeful, developing characters with gentle moments/love, some angst

We Can Always Run by kairennart and queerofthedagger. Long, some angst, strong bonds and soft moments, adventureful

Ironing Out the Kinks by Lex18. Long, so smutty, like 90% smut but also soft, quickly resolved issues

All Things Loved and Lovesick by horsecrazy. So funny, strong bonds, humorous miscommunication

We Are All Diamonds by Footloose. Long, strong bonds/love, soft moments, power duo, quickly resolved issues

The fools will still be fools by horsecrazy. So silly, smutty, low stakes

Evil Overlord Inc by Footloose. Long, very silly, power duo, high stakes but also not worried about it

feel good

I feel like with BBC Merlin fics it’s hard to find low stakes/no angst fics! maybe it’s just my lists, and also that I was trying to avoid making this all lower word count fics (there’s definitely some 40k’s I left out if anyone’s interested), but once the word count rises it’s tough to find. hopefully this agrees well enough, I scoured the fluff tag I swear but the angst sneaks up in there too

I also have noticed that I might not actually read a whole lot of pure fluff? I very specifically seek out mature and explicit merlin fics, which I think is partially the cause of that. Also merthur and fluff are hard earned; the rivals/strangers/enemies to lovers goes STRONG and so rarely do we get to fluff very quickly. There’s always some stressful situations these two are in I swear to god. also please note that I have read SO goddamn many fics that any rank inaccuracies are likely also due to my memory blurring on fic specifics,,, my apologies for this! so take the specific ranks with a grain of salt- I don’t remember the exact details of all of these, more so the impact they left on me as a whole!

anyways, I hope this is accurate enough and that you can find some fics here that are what you’re looking for <3

~ feel free to send asks if you’re looking for specific recs, I’ll do my best to find some that fit the bill :]

[claraweems]

The two instances in VG that really were jarring to me were:

1) At some point, you're in Minrathous (pretty sure) and Rook points out that something looked "cool." He said the word cool in that context. My brain literally stopped and went through my internal roll-a-dex to figure out if that was some kind of callback to a previous game or if there was a double meaning... No... No, that was just really bad word choice. I'm gonna be real: I could see 'cool' being slang for SOMEthing, but not like that. Make it something funny like the "What's Shapin'?" line, which was one of my favorites from the game. (It was modern, sure, but it was corny as fuck and used previously established lore as it's base. It was a perfect combination.)

2) Of COURSE the use of non-binary bothered me! The word, the phrasing, it was just so ... Ugh! Of ALL the races to NOT have a word for it. Make up something! "I've heard other qunari use the word <whatever> for people who are of two souls, and then there's <whatever2> for people who feel like they are neither." And then have a brief canonical conversation about it. Cringe: erased!

EXCEPT... Didn't we already establish that the Qun don't necessarily assign gender in the typical Thedosian/European way anyway!? I know Taash isn't part of the Qun, but wouldn't her very Qunari mother use that system to easily recognize what her daughter is or isn't? Wouldn't Taash being a specific type of warrior instantly assign her a specific gender other than "woman" anyway? Did I misunderstand something from DAI here?

Edit to add this excerpt from the wiki:

The Qunari also have the concept of "Aqun-Athlok," which means "born as one gender but living as another".[61] For example, a woman who shows sincere interest and outstanding talent at fighting will be considered male regardless of biological sex, and socially treated as male for all intents and purposes. For the Qunari, gender is inexorably linked to their role within the Qun.[62]

While this does not necessarily encompass non-binary individuals you cant tell me the Qun don't have a concept for them!

The only other times I can recall anyone in a DA game making a fuss about gender was the Qun gender rolls thing (99% it was a conversation with Bull), learning about Krem's identity, and then Dorian saying he prefers the company of men. And all of those fit in perfectly fine with the world. Even at the time, during first playthrough, none of them stood out as out-of-place. This isn't looking back fondly on something that was jarring at the time.

im definitely not a fan of this man on a personal level for several reasons but guys im starting to think da lost a load bearing wall when he left

[adobe-outdesign]

opposite of that last neo-review! Favorite species of your least favorite paintbrushes?

(Side note, this is the first time I've had to sit down and actually consider what my least favorite colors even are.)

Clay:

Kau: Clay is just such a nothing color; it's oddly specific and has no visual appeal, given that it's completely monotone. I don't think TNT like it either, considering this colour came out in 2005 and only 20 pets can come in it. If they had done more of a pottery color, where the pets are painted with traditional pottery patterns, that could've been really neat, but this is a waste.

That said, the Kau is the best of the lot; the color is nice and the shading and little pockets and nicks do actually make it look like clay. Not saving the color by a long shot, but at least it's well-rendered.

Split:

Xweetok: My problem with split as a colour is just that purple and orange really aren't... a very appealing color combo? You'd think that TNT would go for something super high-contrast, like black and white, or they would change up the color combo with each pet for individuality, but no. I think they chose these colors to tie into the purple vs. orange Grundo conflict, but why they couldn't leave the purple and orange to the Grundo alone is beyond me.

Anyway, the Xweetok's probably as good as you're getting with split. I like that the colors flip not only in the eyes, but also in the ears and along the stripes. It gives the Xweetok a bit of much-needed visual interest compared to your standard split pet.

Striped:

Meerca: Striped is in the same boat as Split, being an early 2000s colour with little effort put into it and a jarring color palette. Blue and pink is a strange color choice in general, and it tends to be so low-contrast as to hurt the eyes. It's not even the same consistent shade of blue and pink, so I can't even give it points for that.

However, the striped Meerca? The striped Meerca slaps. It's only of only two striped pets that don't follow the regular formula (Ruki being the other) and yeah, the chipmunk look is really nice; it works perfectly thematically and the colors are actually bearable here. If all striped pets were this good, this colour wouldn't even be on this list.

Custard:

Meerca: Another oddly niche color and a reminder that Neopets was made by British people. Custard is just a strange choice for a color; it never looks visually appealing and most pets look similar, making it kind of a counterpart to clay. I could've seen this one being similar to chocolate if more effort was put into it, but as-is, it's pretty boring (and kind of unfortunate looking, frankly).

Don't ask me how we ended up with two Meercas on this list, but if you have to have a custard pet, the custard Meerca is the way to go. Instead of just being drippy plain custard, it's a crème brûlée with nice toasty bits. It's the only custard pet that actually looks somewhat appetizing.

Snot:

Grundo: Snot is just another colour that I don't think anyone ever was asking for; it's just kind of gross, and similar to other colors on this list, tends to look all the same. I've heard some people say this colour could've been fixed by just naming it "slime" instead, but that just makes me want a slime color with different colors of slime and maybe some mix-ins, which is not this.

If you have to go snot, I guess the Grundo is the best. The rendering and shading are pretty good, for better or for worse, and the drippy bits are well-placed. Plus if you want a slime colour, the space alien does make the most sense to be sporting it.

[not-poignant]

Assumption: You have never ridden a horse.

Oooo, this is a fun one, salkfjas

I have! I've ridden more than one horse, more than once.

(Actual storytime) (This is from the Assumptions meme!)

In late highschool and in the few years after I had a close friend who owned a horse (Billy) and agisted him, and was responsible for him. She basically was allowed to get him when she got her driver's license.

I was the kind of friend (and still kind of am, energy willing) that you could drag around to all your chores and I'd just be there. So I'd be there when she went shopping. I would be there when she went to get horse food. I would be there when she did homework. I would be there when she went to visit her horse and brush him down and feed him etc.

I helped with basic chores and watched from the sidelines and mostly hung out with her dog, Huskee, who was not a husky, but a borderline collie x corgi who barked nonstop at that horse, who she alas, could not herd.

Through this friend I actually learned about Natural Horsemanship, to the point where I actually went to a couple of Pat Parelli seminars (run by Pat) in like 2000/2001. It was the thing that really sparked my interest in animal training, especially humane, fear free animal training (and clicker training specifically, since Pat was teaching marker training at the time, and said friend started using it on their dog, Huskee).

I never rode, for a long time, because I was happy on the sidelines, and also I went there so my friend could ride her horse, not so I could like, steal her horse out from under her lol. I don't think her horse liked me very much anyway (later I'd find out that was pretty much true, it was a zero respect relationship, maybe he knew I was a doormat lmao).

Anyway, said friend had another friend who was extremely horse intense, and she got her own horse (Coda) , that she then never really took the time to ride. Coda was kind of nuts. Billy was the kind of horse who walked so slow you felt like you were going backwards, Coda had one speed: gallop. Coda and Billy got on great.

But Coda was pretty neglected, and so I often spent time with him while my friend did her chores with Billy. I was used to bringing out food, or changing water etc. so I did that for Coda sometimes. And after a while, friend was like 'it would be cool if we could trail ride together, how about you learn on Billy first since he's so slow and sedate.' And friend was like 'I'll ride Coda because I have more experience.' This made sense! She wanted me to stay safe!! But...

Billy was slow, sedate, and did not give a shit about me. This is a horse that stepped on my feet (on purpose), who deliberately angled towards low-hanging branches to scrape me off the saddle (hilarious, but also not really), and made it clear how much he wasn't interested in anyone else riding him in the most passive aggressive way a horse possibly can.

Coda, on the other hand, had a reputation for being wild and unstable. He'd tossed multiple riders more than once, hadn't been trained with Natural Horsemanship (like...kind of? But not really) and was not halter-broke by the time friend-of-friend got him, so just getting him to accept a halter and a saddle at all was huge, and anything beyond that was like 'welp, good luck.'

However, it was obvious trying to do anything with me and Billy was not going to work out. So...Coda it was.

And idk how to explain it, but Coda and I just got along. It was on the other hand terrifying, because his default movement was 'canter' and all he wanted to do, all he wanted to do, was gallop up and down granite hills as quickly as possible and spook at fucking everything. It wasn't his fault, he wasn't taken out much and he had that kind of personality. He once saw a kangaroo in the distance and spun a full 360 degrees, and I ended up half off him, hanging on for dear life, while friend just stared at me and said: 'how did you not fall off, that was insane. You might actually be good at this.'

Well. No, I wasn't, I just had a good grip, lmao.

So we went on extremely stressful trail rides together. Billy thankfully curbed some of Coda's GOTTA GO FAST instincts but only to a point, so I had to be pretty hypervigilant nonstop because that dude bunched his hindquarters what felt like every ten seconds, and I can't really blame him, it's what he loved to do most. He was just a terrible horse to learn to ride on, lmao, even if we did get along.

I haven't ridden since and honestly haven't felt much of an inclination to. I'd be too heavy now anyway. And I'm pretty certain I'd be bad at it. When your first experience is 'placid horse who generally accepts everyone but stares at you in a desultory manner and makes sure you know - while feeding him / brushing him / watering him etc. - that you do not matter in the grand scheme of things' followed by 'I like you! NOW I WILL FLING MYSELF DOWN THIS GRANITE HILL WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE WE ARE ALL SCREAMING IN EXCITEMENT AND NOT FEAR' you think 'actually I don't need to ride the murder ponies, it's fine.'

Anyway, yeah, I have ridden a horse.

[kathbunny]

Have some thoughts about Kyana and Dani for the au™ conquering my brain! I'm aware it's been multiple days but spotting this post reminded me

In this original game (before VR-LA ended up in that world), they were exclusive options, you could only have one or the other, but they weren't at home doing nothing!

Kyana was easier for new players to use, and her abilities scaled well. Dani was a pain in the ass, but incredibly powerful if you knew what to do to make her consistent. I'm gonna say it just wasn't possible to use Dani unless it was a second playthrough or further (not like, you don't have to complete the game, but a bunch of specific quests instead).

Kyana, as a member of the party would:

Ask a lot of questions, easily leading into explanations of mechanics from the mc.

She's very flexible with what weapons you can give her, letting you just toss your strongest weapons at her without too much thought until you get her weapon specifically late game, at which point all that matters is getting her to name it through the completing the quest line where she gets it. (She also doesn't need a weapon to fight at all, unlike other characters).

She generally is helpful with getting certain friendly interactions that Dani isn't, since she's generally friendly herself.

Dani, as a member of the party would:

Naturally get interested in/discuss puzzles and mechanics, hinting towards more specific solutions or tricks under the expectation the player already understands them anyway.

She can only use her specific weapons found throughout the game, but can upgrade them on her own while travelling, so long as she has the materials (something only shops could do otherwise). You'd need to grind a bit more to get an early Dani to be equal to an early Kyana, but she becomes equally flexible as you find more of her weapons. Some of her ranged stuff is also slightly more luck based on the trade off she'll take less damage when using ranged weapons. People who love Dani in this game fall into two extremes, nerds who wanna make her an overpowered killing machine or people who want her to shoot them.

You can discover what NPCs are like to assholes without being an asshole yourself! And you can also see Dani exclusive cat interactions™.

If you didn't recruit Kyana, she'd end up joining a small group of people defending the starting city against monsters and develop a friendship with the various members, which you can see the progress of when visiting the city. She steadily takes control of her life from others and finds a place that makes her happy with people she trusts.

If you didn't recruit Dani, she'd take to making weapons for the group Kyana would've joined without fighting with them, being more hesitant to join. She'll end up joining them halfway through and eventually also take up leadership of them. She won't soften, but she gets better at phrasing things and more emotionally intelligent about her own feelings.

hello I have recently been made aware that a bad situation I am in is much worse than I thought, and I really could use some fluffy (or honestly angsty too) rwd thoughts or headcanons

[poterimagici]

The History Boys (2006) Derry Girls (2018-2022)

[liauditore]

Equally Invalid