#this is such a dramatic batman shit
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~ Red Hood and the Outlaws (2016)
You cannot escape being the son of Batman when you claim your best friend was a literal gargoyle.
#red hood#jason todd#dc comics#my ramblings#this is such a dramatic batman shit#You know Bruce loved that his kid had a fav gargoyle like yeah this one will be goth not like the other#he gets the family spirit the spirit of Gotham!
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Et Tu?
“Et tu, Brute?” Tim gasped, hand splayed over his chest as he swayed in his seat— perilously close to falling off it.
Duke just snorted. “I am so not Brutus here. No way. I am no where near stabby enough to be the Brutus of this family.”
Tim motioned, like the dramatic little bitch he was, at the stack of Draw 4s on the center pile.
“Man, I was not going to draw that! That’s like, twenty��”
“Twenty-four,” Cass corrected.
“—twenty-four cards. Not my fault you don’t have none.” Duke finished, crossing his arms.
“I had one,” Tim groused. “I just didn’t have two! But no. You, Brutus—”
“Still not the Brutus.” Duke said and rolled his yes. “Damian is a hundred percent the Brutus of the family.”
All of the siblings stopped to consider that, looking at Damian who just scowled back at them from behind his very large hand of Uno cards. It was oddly intimidating, or maybe that’s just how Duke felt. Dick looked close to cooing.
“…Damian did start the Draw 4 war too,” Dick pointed out after a beat.
“Et tu, Brute?” Tim gasped, playing his performance out again but this time directed at Damian.
“Tt. It was a strategic move; you have too few cards. Besides, it is only just for you being so certain you might win.” Damian said. Which was a bratty way to say it, sure, but Duke had to admit the little demon dude was right.
“Ah,” Jason started to grin that made Duke want to scoot his chair back. What he didn’t expect, as Jason folded his cards, was for the other to lean into his Crime Alley accent heavily as he adopted an obviously theatrical air. He motioned from Damian to Tim to the cards. “The noble Brutus hath told you Caesar was ambitious: If it were so, it was a grievous fault, and grievously hath Caesar answer’d it.”
“Oh no,” Dick said, softly horrified.
Jason leaned forward over the table as he moved to stand. “Here, under leave of Brutus and the rest— for Brutus is an honourable man.”
“You got him started on Shakespeare.”
“So are they all, all honourable men—” Jason swept his hand, motioning at all of them and then placed a closed fist on his chest. “Come I to speak in Caesar’s funeral.”
“What did you do, Tim?”
Tim, for his part, looked honestly distressed as Jason flung an arm over his shoulder and pulled him close.
“He was my friend, faithful and just to me!” Jason lamented, looking for the world as if he had just been crying.
Duke was admittedly impressed by the act.
Tim whispered, under Jason’s next line, “I’m so, so sorry.”
#this was not what I was supposed to be writing lol#the ides of march hath me#batman#dc comcis#batfam#dramatic shits#the lot of them#totally inspired by the southern rendition of the funeral scene
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WFA opinions? Love Barbara standing up to Bruce
Ough. Bruce defenders fighting for our lives with this one.
I really like the beginning. We don't usually get nice caring moments between Bruce and Babs (specially not mundane peaceful ones), so I wish that the opening was just a little longer to give us more of that before the fight. I like how Barbara points out that he's treating her like a Robin even though she's basically her own hero who just works with Batman.
I think they're trying to ride a line this season between comic Bruce and the slice of life dad Bruce they set up over the last two seasons and this episode is a particular stumble imo. Blaming Babs for Dick's injuries just doesn't feel super in-character with this version, even if I see what they're going for. They do let him have good talking points, some of which really do sound like they're being said by Bruce Wayne.
Not sure how I feel about Bruce trying to shut down the clocktower. That's something he usually relies on pretty heavily, and shutting it down would only put Babs and his family in more danger. And like I said, she's basically a separate superhero and he's making claim over her stuff. Like how is he gonna force her to leave. They gonna fight? Is he gonna blow it up? Idk. Unfortunately, it does feel like something mainline Bruce would do, and I'm not sure how I feel about that.
This was a very good Barbara episode, but Bruce's character struggled a lot here. She feels right at home in both her normal and WFA characterization while Bruce feels split between the two in a way that just kinda leaves me feeling weird about this one.
#also the art in this one took me out#the random dramatic anime shots of Bruce and Barbara's ever changing head size just kept making me laugh#and why did Alfred look so disturbed in that cliffhanger#wayne family adventures#batman wayne family adventures#batman family#batfamily#bruce wayne#barbara gordon#dc comics#now while i am very critical of this episode in this post i will acknowledge potential outside factors that could be responsible#i know there's been some shit going on with webtoon that i haven't looked into too much#so I'm not trying to be too harsh#dc#webtoon
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Comics fandom whenever something weird or off or unsatisying happens and bad things happen to their faves: Ugh so glad I didn't touch this, going to pretend it never happened
Me; Yes this I can work with this.
#like everything thats happened to Jason#god its so much#and so dramatic#i feel like you could right a million fics about it#also Dick fighting with Bruce and getting real fucking angry about Bruce crossing lines and then Bruce leaves him his kids!!#real dick grayson trauma hours shit#and Tim being the one who always haa to bring people together and calm people down#The Emotional Support Robin strikes again#AND DAMIAN#poor baby has his father character assaasinated right in front of him#anyway I just think theres a lot of meat there#and you gotta pick and choose#jason todd#tim drake#dick grayson#damian wayne#dc comics#batman
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My Tumblr followers. If and when you see this. Just don't look at twitter man
This year is cooked
Sorry for the vent but omg this year man THIS YEAR UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (read tags for context)
#2024 is done#worst year of my life#shitpost#kagevt#Hes coming back after his dramatic af graduation because he's a shit person because 3 months suddenly makes you a better person. Rent due?#People are beefing over whether fat nuggets or waddles is the better pig and saying hazbin copied gravity falls#Bc if we're talking cartoon pigs then 2007 spider pig Simpsons did it way before gravity fall so bad argument their#gravity falls#The dream smp members are being haunted by the ghost of their admins infection rate#Which is to say every dsmp member is gonna take a huge L this year and it's Eret's and Niki's turn currently#eret#niki niachu#AND ALL THE GOOD ANIMES IS ENDING SO I LITERALLY DON'T HAVE A DISTRACTION#AND DON'T GET ME STARTED ON MR BEAST OML#vent post#vent#Eret and Ava Tyson were dating??? And Eret doesn't believe that she'd be “capable” of some of the bad thing she did WHEN ITS ALL PUBLIC INFO#mr beast#He sending out more lawsuits then batman has dollar bills#People are pressuring other people to join Mcc rising even though the team comp is literally too toxic got them#mcyt#Like if they don't want to play then don't make them play simple as. But NOOOOOOOOOO we gotta send disgusting shit and for what??#Have some dignity#I swear if another thing happens this year I'm throwing the YouTube and Twitter files into a nuclear bomb aimed at my brain bc I can't#And all that's on my mind is that if Technoblade could have seen the shit people are doing he'd be disappointed#I feel bad knowing he passed away without knowing the truth but I hope he's happy with what he did have#And my mental health is tanking#UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH#chat i'm cooked
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Jason Todd & Red Hood
+ Alts
#anyway he went to catholic school i think qnd thats why hes like that#this is heavily referenced from one of my own dramatic pictures that i took in college#cant have shit in gotham#jason todd#red hood#batfam#batman#dcu#dc comics#dc universe#dc fanart#jason peter todd#jason robin#robin ii#my art#hozier#take me to church
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Wally didn't even stick around for the group pose
#i mean fair enough. he had a lot of shit to do. he was dearming thousands of escaped prisoners and putting them back in jail#so you know. thats fair. he had to go. he did not have time to pose for the group shot#it's still fucking hilarious though#they all dramatically posed together and Wally went the other fucking way#not only did he not stick around. he didn't even do the group charge with them#i love this man#i love him so much#dc#dc comics#the flash#kid flash#wally west#teen titans#the Titans#Nightwing#dick grayson#Batman#robin
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wayne family adventures going "we're gonna make an entire season about the joker and center literally everyone EXCEPT barbara and jason beyond the bare minimum" is certainly a choice and lemme just say, it is Not a fucking good one
#personal#anti wfa#for one i find it odd that a webtoon whose entire attraction was 'lil slice of life fluff pieces' is trying to do some dramatic arc#around the most amoral psychopath in batman's rogues gallery#for two why am i seeing a whole thing about bruce worried about fucking dick???? fucking DICK??????#barbara was shot and sexually assaulted in her own home and paralyzed for life!!!! jason was tortured and MURDERED!!! at fifteen!!!!#any joker centric arc needs to center them (and duke but they put some marginal effort into duke at least in the beginning)#i could give a shit about tim or steph or damian or dick in a joker arc they're not thematically important!!!#if you're going to do an arc that focuses in part on how the joker affects members of this family#(which they clearly are with the way bruce's storylines are turning out this season)#then it needs to focus on the characters for which the joker is thematically relevant because of the effect he's had on them in his actions#which would be BARBARA GORDON and JASON TODD#(i know someone on the art team said that dick was their favorite so is that it?)#(is that why i sat through panel after panel of 'oh let's focus on dick let's make this about dick' for no reason?)#(when the only interesting dick&joker connection is that time dick straight up beat him to death in jason's memory?)#(not like they'll remember that since they seem determined to rinse out jason and barbara from this whole thing my god i'm annoyed)
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superman & batman: generations #1
[ID: Batman dangling an unconscious criminal off the edge of a large building. The criminal slowly wakes up and looks down, screaming in terror at how high up he is! Batman smirks as he taunts, "Have a nice nap? Now... Let's chat." END ID]
#hes such a little shit <3#i will preach how bruce is one of the ultimate metaphors of compassion however i think its equally important to remember hes a theatre kid#he will rip his heart out for every single stranger and dramatically quote shakespeare in the process#he'll sacrifice himself without hesitation and leaves telling alfred 'ill see you later.... i hope !'#theres no reason for the dramatics other than hes just like that naturally#c: superman & batman: generations | i: 1#batman#crypt's panels
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#basil things#he showed up giving This right before bed and#i died why are you batman sherlocking at me weirdo#basil always somehow arrives in all enviroments from above and im not sure where he comes from but its always dramatic and Terrifying#personal#txt post#they speak#nram#DID#i dont give a shit about covering up basils name. man's got a family member#two exes#so i dont actually give a shit if hes public here actually#theres no one to recognize us from him
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🙄 she was out with friends Bruce, stop being such a buzzkill
Batman/Huntress: Cry For Blood #4 (2000)
#my dad whenever I came home late#dramatic with the one lamp in his run down and old dad chair#‘so glad you decided to come home tonight!#🙄🙄🙄🙄#The Huntress#The Question#Batman#Helena Bertinelli#Vic Sage#Bruce Wayne#dc#detective comics#dc comics#shit I forgot he literally tried to kidnap her last time they spoke LMFNDJDJRNR#comic panels#in the quiver (queue)
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okay watching The Batman for the first time. I’m 5 minutes in and Bruce Wayne is so fucking dramatic I love it
#HES KILLING ME#man… calm tf down#he’s SUCH a weirdo I love him#i can’t watch serious movies because I can’t take shit serious#Robert Pattinson I love you SO much#batman#THIS is Bruce Wayne. THIS is batman#some dramatic loser standing in the rain#pathetic like a wet cat#I’m obsessed#like baby girl this is SO unnecessary#THIS man WOULD dress up as a giant bat#STOP making batman cool and suave. he’s not.#no cool and suave person would dress up as a giant bat and fight criminals and adopt 8 billion children#the best Bruce x Selina dynamic is#pathetic guy crying in the rain x coolest girl you’ve ever seen staring at him with heart eyes
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how would you be defeated as a villain?
massive explosion
you go down magnificently. dramatic, like you always were. you're fighting the hero, and while you are defeated, you bring them down with you (and everyone and everything else within a mile radius).
tagged by || @lethal--laughter (thank you!!!) tagging || anyone who wants to, you're tagged! tag me back so I can see!
#pass it on || dash games#blood tw#// OKAY OKAY HEAR ME OUT#// while Viktor is absolutely not the explosions or showy kind at all this oddly still fits just enough with them#// but like... a quiet explosion kind of way#// because they ABSOLUTELY want to take Batman with them just not in the way you think#// they want Batman to kill them and fall to their way of thinking if he won't fall to their blade#// they want him to see the 'reality' of Death instead of trying so hard to keep his crusade going#// which they see as admirable but deeply misguided#// to them death is the answer to the world's injustice and suffering#// and they'd be a dramatic little shit about it the whole way obviously
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"justice league doesn't know batman has kids" and by some freak incident, they end up meeting them all at once, after never having one single sneaking suspicion of batman being a family guy.
you've got every batkid + justice league member in the same room, and bruce tries for a total of 6 seconds to diffuse the situation before giving up.
there's bats left right and centre making completely false claims about how their family came to be, just to stir shit. also purposely trying to ruin batman's 'stoic and mean' reputation as best as they can.
jason and steph are telling everyone that they're all bio kids, and bruce does try and correct that one (some of those kids don't even belong to him in a non-bio way!!) but not before tim pipes up and goes 'well actually it depends what you count as biological, he grew me in a lab'.
dick's taking full advantage of the JL's perception of batman being oh so impressionable in the moment, and is telling stories of his childhood + batman raising his younger siblings, making him out to be the softest guy to ever exist (completely on purpose). cass is nodding along next to him, and making sure whenever she adds a comment that she uses the word 'dad' instead of batman just for the extra domestic flare.
babs and jason are explaining how they all consider themselves bats, in a way that would make anyone believe that they're in a cult. bruce is standing amidst it all, an immovable object, with dick's arm on his shoulder, and damian huddled into his side (ALL for dramatic flare. they need the JL to know that he's. just a guy with kids).
#i've seen a lot of good posts where people talk them meeting the kids one by one#but i do enjoy this idea....#bruce wayne#batman#dick grayson#jason todd#tim drake#damian wayne#cass cain#steph brown#barbara gordon#nightwing#red hood#red robin#robin#batgirl#oracle#dc orphan#dc spoiler#jla#justice league#dc comics#dcu#dc#gothihop speaks
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Sea Cryptic! Danny AU- Pt. 7
[Pt.1] [Pt.2] [Pt.3] [Pt.4] [Pt.5] [Pt.6] [Pt.8] [Pt.9] [Pt.10]
“I’m having a child.”
Danny stared at Batman.
“…Uh, congrats?”
Batman whips out a stack of paper and a pen. “It’s you. Sign here and initial the highlighted spots.”
Danny instinctively, from years of dealing with Vlad, whacked the stack right out of Batman’s hands and into the bay. He doesn’t even feel bad about littering this time because, “Begone, fruitloop!”
Wait, no, that’s not what he meant.
“I mean- I have parents!”
“Not for long.” Batman muttered and then did a double take. “You have parents? How?”
Danny gasped, placing a hand on his chest to clutch his metaphorical pearls. He ignored Batman’s mutters. Everyone knows the vigilante has an adoption problem. At least, everyone who lived in Gotham did, as everyone who didn’t was somehow convinced that he “worked alone” or some bullshit like that. “Are you naturally this insensitive or were you dropped on your head as a baby? Obviously I had to come from somewhere.”
“They’re still… alive?”
“And kicking,” Danny said, inching away from yet another rich weird guy trying to adopt him. “Mostly the kicking part, though.” He said, remembering the sparring sessions. His mom could kick his as six ways to Sunday with nothing but jiu-jitsu and still have time to work in the lab.
“I see.”
“I’m charging you extra for the emotional upheaval. I have trauma regarding rich people trying to adopt me.”
Batman sullenly handed over a thousand.
“Sweet. There’s a group of shades down here asking if you could find their murderer. Apparently the serial killer is still at large.” Danny pointed.
“Of course. Tell me everything.”
The adoption papers disappeared as Batman went into detective mode.
Danny shoved the cash into his glowing chest and breathed a sigh of relief. He needed to make rent this month so it was a windfall running into Batman.
——
“Hey, Tim?”
Tim woke up from his Power Nap. “Huh?”
“Phantom’s complaining that Batman kept trying to adopt him.”
Tim blinked. “Uh.. what does that have to do with me?”
Danny stared at him, a patiently amused smile on his face. “Just in case the rumor about the Wayne’s sugar-daddy-into the Bats was a thing. Other than that, we might have to confront Batman to get him off of Phantom’s back. ”
“You… want to confront Batman.”
“Hey, man, Phantom’s a friend and it’s ride or die.” Danny snickered. It was literally die, with his Phantom side of things. He held two fists up, and wound them, like Popeye right after eating spinach or something. “And if Batman bothers Phantom, we ride at dawn.”
“Batman doesn’t come out unless it’s dark, though? Or for the Justice League.” Tim grinned. He mentally classified Danny under his “to go to” list. That’s where Bart, Bernard, Cassie, Kon, and Garfield were. If he starts shit, he could count on them to have his back and cause even more shit. Danny, wanting to fistfight Bruce over the man making Phantom uncomfortable? He absolutely is making that list.
“Then we ride at, like, dusk. Or uh, like 10PM. I gotta get my beauty sleep.”
“You’ll definitely need it,” Tim inconspicuously texted the group chat, which quickly blew up.
“Shut up,” Danny playfully shoved Tim. “Wait, can Batman even legally adopt? Isn’t being a vigilante illegal? And how can he adopt someone dead?”
Tim dramatically flailed and splayed over Danny’s carpeted living room. “Dunno about his identity,” he lied to Danny, like a liar. “But Gotham has a bunch of laws for the undead/restored to life people so there’s probably enough gray space there.”
Danny spluttered. “You guys have undead friendly laws?”
“Yeah, geht do you think Grundy just chills out? Plus, we have like a minor resurrection event every few years. It usually doesn’t stick but sometimes it does. Bruce pushed for those laws when Jason came back to life, except he doesn’t actually want people to know he’s like, alive.”
“Jason died?” Danny blinked. Well, that would explain the vibes. “Huh. So what’s up with his rank vibes then?”
“Rank vibes?” Tim pressed record on his phone.
Danny nodded. “Yeah, you know how Phantom’s got like a really chill green vibe?” Inwardly, Danny snickered at his pun. Chill. Yeah, he meant that very literally. “Jason’s got kind of a rank green vibe. He’s kind of stinky? Definitely never introduce him to Phantom.” Danny’s senses got worse in his ghost form.
“Jason regularly showers, though?!”
“Not smell! Like, a spiritual smell?”
“You can smell souls?!” Tim sat up. “Bro, you’re a meta?!”
“Uh.” Danny hesitated. “Yeah. I can smell souls. It’s a thing. Everyone from my town can do it.”
“What?!” Tim paused. “Wait, can Phantom smell souls?”
“Yeah. We’re, uh, from the same town.”
“Danny, what the fuck?”
“Hey, don’t look at me like that, you’re the one with a soul-sick brother! Not to mention, you’re kinda stinky too!”
“Hey!”
“Soul-stinky nerd man!”
——
“I stink?!” Jason spluttered out, extremely offended.
“The Lazarus pits. He’s most likely smelling traces of Lazarus pit on you, you imbecile.”
“We need to speak to Phantom. This instant.”
“I dunno, B. Danny sounded like he was gonna break your face if you bothered Phantom anymore.” Dick snickered.
“Yeah,” Tim chimed in, from his seat in front of the Bat-computer. “He was pretty serious.”
“Are we just gonna glaze over the fact that they’re from the same town?!” Stephanie exclaimed, practicing her moves on a training dummy.
“How does that even work? What does that mean? I thought Phantom was an immortal?” Duke asked.
“We also can’t rule out time-travel.” Barbara slammed her baton into a training dummy, twisting her wheelchair in an agile maneuver that left the dummy on the floor.
“No bothering Phantom.” Cass proclaimed.
“That’s quite right. You all have a warm dinner sitting above your cave and should it remain uneaten, I assure you that sherbet Sunday and crêpe Tuesday shall be canceled.” Alfred stepped in. The Bats, threatened, scrambled to ditch their gear and go upstairs.
#Danny: not another adoption!#Vlad and Bruce trying to adopt Danny even though he’s got parents:🤝#batman#danny phantom#tim drake#jason todd#bruce wayne#dc x dp#bamf danny phantom#dpxdc#dcxdp#dcxdp crossover#sea cryptic! danny au
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Exposé didn't have to stick to one city for long. While his public image was that of a villain on the run after being beat a few too many times, whispers started to travel through young heroes. Was he a villain, or the strangest anti-hero they'd ever seen? None of his hostages were ever hurt thanks to his careful planning, but in a way no one could notice until after he fled. Some heroes ignored and doubted the rumors making their way through the grapevine, and they were the hardest to teach, but Exposé did anyway. Even switching up his fighting styles on occasion to keep them on their toes.
He learned a lot about this new world this way, too. About the Meta gene and the acts that protected them, the public image of Meta's that rose and dipped dependant on if a new Meta hero showed up, or a villain.
He had no real reason to show up in places like Superman's city, where the hero was never more than a moment away. He did test some of the surrounding areas and was glad to find some minor heroes and vigilantes that used Super as a template, making sure to show up fast, and call in bigger guns as needed. He spent some time with them working with the natural tech-blackout properties his ghost half granted him, showing them they could take bigger fights than they thought.
Eventually, he made his way to Gotham, but he knew better than to go in bat swinging the hornets nest like usual. Or... bringing a flashlight to a cave? But some of them were birds, not bats....
Regardless of the anamalia kingdom the heroes hailed from, he realized after a few days of flying around undetected that there wasn't much these guys weren't good at. Most of them seemed older, which helped, but there was definitely one child on the team, and two or three he suspected were young enough to be in high school or college. And yet, it seemed like at least two of his three concerns were out in full force every day. Signal at least have a daytime shift most of the time, so Danny gave him a pass. Maybe he had online classes. But with how often all of them were on patrol, he had to do Something.
He couldn't go in as Exposé though, this city was protected by "The World's Greatest Detective" who probably already tracked his path to have Gotham next on his list. The only question was, did the whispers reach Gotham's protector, or was he unaware of Exposé's underlying goals?
A good excuse arose when one of the first teams he fought had a transition of power; a new leader stepped into the light as another moved on. Gotham could wait a moment as Exposé came back to exact his revenge on a team already struggling with new dynamics. It didn't take long to get them settled in, though, after more experienced teammates convinced their new leader of his intentions. Three weeks later, he got himself cornered on a building overlooking an outlet to sea, and baited a hero into sending him sailing over the side. He felt a bit bad at the look in the teens face at what they'd done, so he retracted his mask a bit, enough to give them a wink, before falling the rest of the way to his "doom" during an unfortunately inconvenient blackout, so it took time for anyone to try and dredge up his body. They never found anything, of course. Danny had given a nice dramatic death but not dead excuse for himself as he tucked away one villain persona for another. It was time to take on Gotham.
By the time he arrived, it was nearing finals in the local colleges and standardized testing time in school, and he trailed the heroes for a few more days as they became frantic, trying to study on patrol. This was ridiculous! Batman had the largest team of heroes of any one city, even if many rotated out to other areas. Surely he could let some of his team members take a few days off for school.
This would take more planning than just a different type of rescue every few days. He would have to hit hard, from as many angles as possible. It was at this point he realized he may be testing Batman more than any of the younger vigilantes. If the Bat was in charge, he had to take accountability for his team, in and out of patrol.
So he tossed his villain-sona to the side, temporarily. He had to throw the Bat off after all, and instead started recruiting some low-level street thugs to help cause some chaos, and start whispers of someone new gathering power. He hit targets and committed crimes relevant to what he could overhear them studying on patrols.
A regular break-in at the Gotham Museum? Gotham PD can handle it. Just kidding, have this riddle on how to diffuse the bomb based off your history flashcards.
City wakes up to gas tanks mounted outside of the police building set to release with no way to diffuse? What a coincidence they're clearly labeled with what chemical is inside, and the vigilante just learned that misting them with regular H2O upon release will render it harmless!
Sudden challenges like these kept appearing, the team theorizing who was behind them. Riddler? Baffler? Cluemaster?
(Danny was embarrassed by the naming conventions the rogues took on in this city, and he used to fight people called The Lunch Lady.)
All the while, regular crime ramped up. Non-violent, as per Danny's anonymous request, but it put stress and surpise on the team. Which mundane crime report over the scanners would be a cover for something more sinister?
He decided to bring everything together two nights before Finals started (he had to give them at least one good night's sleep before testing started). He left clues and crimes all over the city, eventually getting the smallest Robin separated from the rest, even for a moment. The kid was exhausted even if his snappy attitude argued otherwise, and he kept muttering historical facts about notable scientists. He was easy for Danny to take out, even with the sword. (Who gave this kid a sword!?) He removed any trackers from his suit and set his earpiece by the ledge where he had snagged him from.
He didn't physically hurt the kid, just used a trick he learned from Nocturn that could temporarily put him to sleep. The kid needed it anyway. By the time he woke up, Danny was back in his Exposé costume and patiently explained his plan to the stab-happy Robin. He had him tied up and hanging over a piece of live, evil looking machinery in a warehouse. This city was weird.
He had left an extra line of a the puzzle to each crime he caused that night that would lead the kid's team straight to them, but without trackers on the kid, it may take some time for them to realize they were clues. So after showing Robin his portals and explaining he was in no danger, he went over some flashcards with the kid, thinking up a few mnemonic devices to help him remember arbitrary dates and personal facts.
Eventually, Danny felt someone step on the property and hid himself away. Hell, even Robin played along, starting to writhe and fight at the ropes, which quickly started fraying. Red Robin was first to burst into the room and reassure the young Robin, followed by the Bat himself. He had placed a few grunts around the site to make this convincing, so he assumed that's where the others were. As soon as Red Robin rushed to the platform to save their smaller counterpart, Danny started speaking. Keeping himself hidden in the shadows, he barked orders from the catwalk above.
"Ah-Ah Ah. Careful. That's not how this game goes tonight." Their attention shifted to him. "You break the rules, he gets dropped. You've played my game enough to find this place, so you best behave."
"You kidnapped one of our own, and yet still hide in the shadows. This game is over." Batman challenged him, so he pushed back a little bit. A push of the button on the control panel next to him lowered Robin toward the machine. Even if he somehow swung out of the way of the moving parts, the drop was too far for someone with no grapple hook or place to grab onto, and they were still too far from him to catch him. Robin stayed stock still as his rope slipped just a bit more off the hook at the moment, and Red Robin spoke up.
"Okay, we get it. What is your puzzle? Or should we say Riddle?"
"Hm? I suppose you could call them riddles, sure." He turned on a spotlight that hid himself more against the contrast, and illuminated three vats of chemicals. Each had a valve on the bottom to open onto the rope Robin hung from.
"Two of these are filled with very real, very caustic chemicals, that will burn through that rope before you can say 'Hero'. The third is a chemical that can't exist, and therefore empty. You choose which vat to open, and whether Robin lives, or dies." He gestured to the second control panel before them.
Batman immediately tried to use his tech to solve the compound equation written on each lever, only to find it fizzle out thanks to Danny's natural EMP properties, chanelled directly at them.
"Ah-ah. Thats cheating~" he taunted, lowering Robin a tad more, who gasped just audibly. Nice touch.
Red Robin stepped up next, running his fingers across the compounds. "How long do we have?"
"Hm?" Danny actually hadn't thought of that. "Oh, I suppose until I get bored. Does that help?" He inched Robin a tad closer to death, and Red quickly grabbed a nearby abandonded pad of paper and pen, scribbling out which compound could actually exist as written.
Danny yawned dramatically; other vigilantes had made it to the warehouse, but not inside yet.
"There!" Danny glanced down at the young hero who had solved the compound.
"Are you sure?" The vigilante's lips tightened, doubting himself only a moment. "Then pull the lever." Danny taunted, and a look passed between the two vigilantes as Red Robin gripped the lever corresponding closest to Robin. They still had no outside comms, no backup had found them. It was just down to this choice.
Red Robin pulled the lever, and an alarm sounded as the machine whirred to life, opening the valve.
Which promptly flodded their vision in bright green.
They both raced to try and reach Robin, but his screams were drowned by the rushing liquid following his dissent toward the machine below.
Danny, of course, opened up a small portal last minute, and just like he was told, Robin righted himself and went board-straight to fit through it. That wasn't what Batman and Red Robin saw, though. Danny carefully caught Robin as he came through the other side of the portal, setting him down while they were still distracted.
"Kinda feel bad." Danny started, leaning on the railing with the littlest bird, who really just seemed to be his age. "I mean, the kid was technically right."
Robin turned to him, waiting for his word to be able to move back to his team. "You rigged it? That is not as honorable as you claim to be." Danny just shrugged, making sure his Exposé mask was in place.
"Tomato Tomato." Exposé ducked as a batarang flew over his head. They were after him now that they couldn't find Robin. "Shall we?" He handed back the boy's grapple hook, who quickly rushed down to them, and the others who had finally made it up to the platform.
"Robin!" Batman rushed to his youngest vigilante, who assured him he was fine.
"How did you escape!?" Red Robin exclaimed.
"He did not."
All eyes turned to Danny as he flew down to meet them, touching down on the metal and taking a few steps to catch himself. Their weapons were drawn, but it didn't bother him.
"Robin fell because of your mistake, I simply didn't let him suffer for your actions."
"Why." Batman's voice was so deep he practically growled the word.
"Wait, I know you. You're-" Danny cut off Signal with a theatrical bow.
"Exposé, at your service. And you all have failed terribly this past week."
"You set all those traps, those bombs!?" Exposé nodded ad Red Robin. "Why!?"
"Because you are all great vigilantes. But your mentor has let you down by giving you all the wrong priorities."
Batman growled again. "What priorities, exactly?"
Danny threw his hands in the air comically. "Three of your team members are in school!!! They have finals coming up and they're still out on patrol! The little one was so tired I almost put him down for a nap waiting for you all!" Robin tutted at this, but Danny just put his hands on his hips at him.
The team was rightfully thrown off by his explanation.
"I go around, testing and pushing young and inexperienced vigilantes to know their limits, learn to work as a team, and get more people saved than killed. There's nothing along those lines I can teach you.
Batman though, you should be ashamed. Red Robin has been studying compounds during patrol for the last week and couldn't-"
"You were following us on patrol?" Signal asked incredulously, and Exposé sorta shrugged his shoulder noncommittally. Focusing his attention back on Batman, he jabbed a finger his direction.
"You should be ashamed. These kids are in school, they should not be beating people up on a weekday! And why does that one have a sword!"
The group looked to each other awkwardly at his little rant, some obviously agreeing through body language.
"You put the lives of Gotham at risk because of this? Those gas tanks-" Batman started
"Had such a strangely coincidental timer corresponding to that shoddy sprinkler on the corner." Red Robin blinked, and Danny saw something click in his head.
"The bomb, the museum would have lost-"
"Yeah, that wasn't even a real bomb. Did you even notice that? They were saran wrapped bricks of cream cheese. All of the officers on site were hired goons who lost the evidence the moment you left. And yet you let Robin deactivate it based off a question from his upcoming history test." That got a snicker out of Spoiler, and more than a few shot her a look.
"Face it Batsy, you've gotten irresponsible with your team. I pushed you all harder and harder and instead of letting them take the back seat because they have their own lives to take care of, you let them keep fighting to the point of exhaustion, which was the only way I was able to get Robin in the first place."
Batman was silent, but Danny didn't really care. He didn't mind if he didn't get a confession or apology. He'd be watching for changes anyway. But it was getting kinda awkward.
"So, do better." He patted his chest and gave them a peace sign before walking away, quickly getting a rope tangled around his wrist.
"Where do you think you're going? We aren't just going to let you walk away without facing justice."
Danny sighed at the bat, turning around.
"You are, actually. For several reasons." He walked toward them. "One, because I didn't hurt anybody. Two, because you let Robin fall. Three, because you can't touch me." He lifted his wrist and made it intangible, watching Batman's face as the metal rope fell through him to the ground.
"If you think being a Meta makes you untouchable in Gotham, you're wrong." Danny admittedly stumbled a bit when a collar clamped onto his neck, shot from one of the other teammembers who were slowly closing in.
"That would be true, if I was a Meta." Once again, he turned on his intangibility, this time for his whole body, and kept it.
"Do you want to know why I do what I do? Why I go around, antagonizing children who run around in spandex and call themselves heroes?" Danny stepped toward Batman again, and the others raised weapons, ready to strike at his word. Raising his hands to his mask, he slowly, dramatically, removed it, showing his sickly green skin, litchenberg scars creeping up his neck to his left temple.
"I do this because I was a hero, once. A child. And. I. Died. Not even you can arrest a ghost, Batman."
The horrified looks in the room gave him confidence that the message would be heard. Putting the mask back on, he walked straight through Batman before dissapearing from sight.
DP x DC Prompt
Danny was sent to the DC universe to save him from the GIW and the Fenton's by Clockwork
Doesn't know what to do here, but as an Experienced Vigilante:tm: he takes note of all the INexperienced vigilante's causing more danger than they realize.
Danny takes it upon himself to act as a low level villain so he can secretly train these vigilante's to be stronger. One day, a Bigger Villain decides to Fuck Around and Find Out.
All his "enemies" realize Danny could've folded them anytime he wanted when he effortlessly defeats the Big Bad.
#Danny is a dramatic little shit#i feel like after waiting for so long for everyone to show up that he'd become friends with Damien if given the chance#sure he didnt die Because he was a hero (more like he was a hero because he died) but semantics semantics#Duke Tim and Damien are banned from patrol the next two nights#danny's job here is done (for now) (hes going after Batmans emotional constipation)#alfred is pleased the children are focusing on their school so much lately#dpxdc#danny phantom
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