#this is so unfunny I just wanted to create it

[quackoyesyes]

Jack’s POV:

[mostlysignssomeportents]

I assure you, an AI didn’t write a terrible “George Carlin” routine

There are only TWO MORE DAYS left in the Kickstarter for the audiobook of The Bezzle, the sequel to Red Team Blues, narrated by @wilwheaton! You can pre-order the audiobook and ebook, DRM free, as well as the hardcover, signed or unsigned. There's also bundles with Red Team Blues in ebook, audio or paperback.

On Hallowe'en 1974, Ronald Clark O'Bryan murdered his son with poisoned candy. He needed the insurance money, and he knew that Halloween poisonings were rampant, so he figured he'd get away with it. He was wrong:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ronald_Clark_O%27Bryan

The stories of Hallowe'en poisonings were just that – stories. No one was poisoning kids on Hallowe'en – except this monstrous murderer, who mistook rampant scare stories for truth and assumed (incorrectly) that his murder would blend in with the crowd.

Last week, the dudes behind the "comedy" podcast Dudesy released a "George Carlin" comedy special that they claimed had been created, holus bolus, by an AI trained on the comedian's routines. This was a lie. After the Carlin estate sued, the dudes admitted that they had written the (remarkably unfunny) "comedy" special:

https://arstechnica.com/ai/2024/01/george-carlins-heirs-sue-comedy-podcast-over-ai-generated-impression/

As I've written, we're nowhere near the point where an AI can do your job, but we're well past the point where your boss can be suckered into firing you and replacing you with a bot that fails at doing your job:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/15/passive-income-brainworms/#four-hour-work-week

AI systems can do some remarkable party tricks, but there's a huge difference between producing a plausible sentence and a good one. After the initial rush of astonishment, the stench of botshit becomes unmistakable:

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2024/jan/03/botshit-generative-ai-imminent-threat-democracy

Some of this botshit comes from people who are sold a bill of goods: they're convinced that they can make a George Carlin special without any human intervention and when the bot fails, they manufacture their own botshit, assuming they must be bad at prompting the AI.

This is an old technology story: I had a friend who was contracted to livestream a Canadian awards show in the earliest days of the web. They booked in multiple ISDN lines from Bell Canada and set up an impressive Mbone encoding station on the wings of the stage. Only one problem: the ISDNs flaked (this was a common problem with ISDNs!). There was no way to livecast the show.

Nevertheless, my friend's boss's ordered him to go on pretending to livestream the show. They made a big deal of it, with all kinds of cool visualizers showing the progress of this futuristic marvel, which the cameras frequently lingered on, accompanied by overheated narration from the show's hosts.

The weirdest part? The next day, my friend – and many others – heard from satisfied viewers who boasted about how amazing it had been to watch this show on their computers, rather than their TVs. Remember: there had been no stream. These people had just assumed that the problem was on their end – that they had failed to correctly install and configure the multiple browser plugins required. Not wanting to admit their technical incompetence, they instead boasted about how great the show had been. It was the Emperor's New Livestream.

Perhaps that's what happened to the Dudesy bros. But there's another possibility: maybe they were captured by their own imaginations. In "Genesis," an essay in the 2007 collection The Creationists, EL Doctorow (no relation) describes how the ancient Babylonians were so poleaxed by the strange wonder of the story they made up about the origin of the universe that they assumed that it must be true. They themselves weren't nearly imaginative enough to have come up with this super-cool tale, so God must have put it in their minds:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/04/29/gedankenexperimentwahn/#high-on-your-own-supply

That seems to have been what happened to the Air Force colonel who falsely claimed that a "rogue AI-powered drone" had spontaneously evolved the strategy of killing its operator as a way of clearing the obstacle to its main objective, which was killing the enemy:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/06/04/ayyyyyy-eyeeeee/

This never happened. It was – in the chagrined colonel's words – a "thought experiment." In other words, this guy – who is the USAF's Chief of AI Test and Operations – was so excited about his own made up story that he forgot it wasn't true and told a whole conference-room full of people that it had actually happened.

Maybe that's what happened with the George Carlinbot 3000: the Dudesy dudes fell in love with their own vision for a fully automated luxury Carlinbot and forgot that they had made it up, so they just cheated, assuming they would eventually be able to make a fully operational Battle Carlinbot.

That's basically the Theranos story: a teenaged "entrepreneur" was convinced that she was just about to produce a seemingly impossible, revolutionary diagnostic machine, so she faked its results, abetted by investors, customers and others who wanted to believe:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Theranos

The thing about stories of AI miracles is that they are peddled by both AI's boosters and its critics. For boosters, the value of these tall tales is obvious: if normies can be convinced that AI is capable of performing miracles, they'll invest in it. They'll even integrate it into their product offerings and then quietly hire legions of humans to pick up the botshit it leaves behind. These abettors can be relied upon to keep the defects in these products a secret, because they'll assume that they've committed an operator error. After all, everyone knows that AI can do anything, so if it's not performing for them, the problem must exist between the keyboard and the chair.

But this would only take AI so far. It's one thing to hear implausible stories of AI's triumph from the people invested in it – but what about when AI's critics repeat those stories? If your boss thinks an AI can do your job, and AI critics are all running around with their hair on fire, shouting about the coming AI jobpocalypse, then maybe the AI really can do your job?

https://locusmag.com/2020/07/cory-doctorow-full-employment/

There's a name for this kind of criticism: "criti-hype," coined by Lee Vinsel, who points to many reasons for its persistence, including the fact that it constitutes an "academic business-model":

https://sts-news.medium.com/youre-doing-it-wrong-notes-on-criticism-and-technology-hype-18b08b4307e5

That's four reasons for AI hype:

to win investors and customers;

to cover customers' and users' embarrassment when the AI doesn't perform;

AI dreamers so high on their own supply that they can't tell truth from fantasy;

A business-model for doomsayers who form an unholy alliance with AI companies by parroting their silliest hype in warning form.

But there's a fifth motivation for criti-hype: to simplify otherwise tedious and complex situations. As Jamie Zawinski writes, this is the motivation behind the obvious lie that the "autonomous cars" on the streets of San Francisco have no driver:

https://www.jwz.org/blog/2024/01/driverless-cars-always-have-a-driver/

GM's Cruise division was forced to shutter its SF operations after one of its "self-driving" cars dragged an injured pedestrian for 20 feet:

https://www.wired.com/story/cruise-robotaxi-self-driving-permit-revoked-california/

One of the widely discussed revelations in the wake of the incident was that Cruise employed 1.5 skilled technical remote overseers for every one of its "self-driving" cars. In other words, they had replaced a single low-waged cab driver with 1.5 higher-paid remote operators.

As Zawinski writes, SFPD is well aware that there's a human being (or more than one human being) responsible for every one of these cars – someone who is formally at fault when the cars injure people or damage property. Nevertheless, SFPD and SFMTA maintain that these cars can't be cited for moving violations because "no one is driving them."

But figuring out who which person is responsible for a moving violation is "complicated and annoying to deal with," so the fiction persists.

(Zawinski notes that even when these people are held responsible, they're a "moral crumple zone" for the company that decided to enroll whole cities in nonconsensual murderbot experiments.)

Automation hype has always involved hidden humans. The most famous of these was the "mechanical Turk" hoax: a supposed chess-playing robot that was just a puppet operated by a concealed human operator wedged awkwardly into its carapace.

This pattern repeats itself through the ages. Thomas Jefferson "replaced his slaves" with dumbwaiters – but of course, dumbwaiters don't replace slaves, they hide slaves:

https://www.stuartmcmillen.com/blog/behind-the-dumbwaiter/

The modern Mechanical Turk – a division of Amazon that employs low-waged "clickworkers," many of them overseas – modernizes the dumbwaiter by hiding low-waged workforces behind a veneer of automation. The MTurk is an abstract "cloud" of human intelligence (the tasks MTurks perform are called "HITs," which stands for "Human Intelligence Tasks").

This is such a truism that techies in India joke that "AI" stands for "absent Indians." Or, to use Jathan Sadowski's wonderful term: "Potemkin AI":

https://reallifemag.com/potemkin-ai/

This Potemkin AI is everywhere you look. When Tesla unveiled its humanoid robot Optimus, they made a big flashy show of it, promising a $20,000 automaton was just on the horizon. They failed to mention that Optimus was just a person in a robot suit:

https://www.siliconrepublic.com/machines/elon-musk-tesla-robot-optimus-ai

Likewise with the famous demo of a "full self-driving" Tesla, which turned out to be a canned fake:

https://www.reuters.com/technology/tesla-video-promoting-self-driving-was-staged-engineer-testifies-2023-01-17/

The most shocking and terrifying and enraging AI demos keep turning out to be "Just A Guy" (in Molly White's excellent parlance):

https://twitter.com/molly0xFFF/status/1751670561606971895

And yet, we keep falling for it. It's no wonder, really: criti-hype rewards so many different people in so many different ways that it truly offers something for everyone.

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2024/01/29/pay-no-attention/#to-the-little-man-behind-the-curtain

Back the Kickstarter for the audiobook of The Bezzle here!

Image:

Cryteria (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:HAL9000.svg

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

--

Ross Breadmore (modified) https://www.flickr.com/photos/rossbreadmore/5169298162/

CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

[eternalera]

I'm making an analysis of this scene because fuck it, it means sm to me

so basically the scene im talking about is the one above and why (because fuck you l like adam and lute) it means so much to me

first off when do we actually see adam smile and im not talking about when he's being an asshole to charlie or making some unfunny sex joke. I'm talking about when he looks genuine.

Like he looks actually happy, not entertained but happy because thats what it is with charlie. He's smiling because he's entertained with her reactions and how pissed he's making her.

Whenever we see him smile it has this almost evil feel to it (whether that be with the teeth in the mask that he wears or not although it probably is... i'll get to that later). It feels like he's meant to be the villain. He's meant to be someone you're meant to hate. So why in this scene does it make you feel bad for him and lute? (almost depending on the person cause yes i know some of you jumped up with joy at this, i aint judging)

it makes you feel bad because there's something human in this scene whether we like it or not. that also comes with the removal of their masks. we've never seen adam without his mask so him losing it in this scene provides us with the sense that 'hey hes still human' he's not some eldritch being sent from hell/heaven. he's a guy.

this also comes with the removal of lutes mask. we see her genuine emotion. we actually see her being to cry something that honestly seems almost out of character for her seeing as she's pretty much that one character whos like 'fuck it lets power through this'

this also is similar to adam smiling cause it shows you that in the end he wasn't a total asshole.

but back to the masks. the masks make them have pretty sharp looking teeth which is something that we associate with sharks or some sort of predator. yet removing the teeth (actually adam doesnt even smile with his teeth) you suddenly get a lot more of a human feeling

they dont feel like a villain anymore (even though thats what they are) they feel like a person. it doesnt make him feel like a threat anymore so you have an actual ability to feel bad for him.

but moving on (i ramble a lot so this may not stay on track but its fine :D ).

our last scene of adam in this entire show (im pretty sure like yknow... direct scene) is him smiling. him showing genuine human emotion. because whether or not you guys wanna admit it adam was the first human, and he does have feelings that pertain to humans. so why have this be our last view of him? of him being quite literally beaten down.

well personally i feel like this is because the show wants us to see him as lute sees him. she saw him (as from what ive gathered) as a genuine friend. she actually liked his company and liked hanging around him.

so this pushes her idea and avenging adam or getting revenge for his death. if we didnt have this scene her just getting upset at lilith and taking charge randomly and getting just randomly mad at the hotel would be kinda... eh.

like it wouldnt make for that good of a story.

but with our last moments of adam being him smiling at lute it shows us basically something else. that he cared, for what? we dont really know but he cared for something because its clear that the extermination failed and adams dying. hes fucking dying something he seemed so upset over two seconds ago screaming and shouting how he shouldnt die or whatever

so its most likely that he cared for lute making this scene all the much sadder. besides its the only thing we can assume seeing that lute was the last thing that he saw before passing on.

also ive seen theories that make a lot of sense with lute being the only one who stuck it out with adam till the end. lilith left him, eve was created from his fucking rib and yet she most likely left him. so he probably died pretty damn along the first time around

so lute being there for him and showing that she cared for him and that she still cares for him probably meant a lot. most likely because she stuck around until his death, she stuck around till the end which once again, he died alone the first time and dying with someone with you the second probably means a lot

anywaysssss yeah thats it byeeee

[showtoonzfan]

Now that the episode is out officially, here’s my rant review of Oops!

PROS:

- Fizz and Ozzie were adorable and I honestly love them. Despite the sex jokes, you can tell they love each other for who they are OUTSIDE of sex. While I did wish we would have seen more, (like how Ozzie took him in and fell in love) they’re still adorable to watch. They’re the better version of Stolitz, can the show be about them instead?

- Brandon’s voice acting holy shit, he really knows how to sound like he’s in tears or is broken. As much as I hate the character and feel no sympathy, he displayed genuine and broken emotion very well.

- Alex Brightman Alex Brightman

Okay that’s it. Moving on to the Cons. Bear with me, it’s a lot and I go back and forth a bit. 😭

CONS:

So for a quick short summary, this episode:

- Once again puts more focus on the filler plot rather than actually focusing on the relationships between the characters, so all we're left with is a 10 second clip of Fizz being burned while the rest of the episode is surrounded on sex jokes/petty bickering and Stolas and Ozzie sitting around.

- Completely erases what made Blitz and Fizz's dynamic interesting in the first place because it retcons it with a dumb miscommunication trope about how Fizz actually wanted to see Blitz and Blitz tried reaching out to him. Not only does this feel like a cheap attempt to make Blitz out to be sweet/sympathetic and NOT the one in the wrong so Fizz can suck up to him, but this also makes no sense within the narrative.

- Has Fizz forgive Blitz despite him being the last person anyone would think would forgive him. (So honestly ruins Fizz himself because it turned him into a soft boy who's forgiving compared to the asshole he was in Ozzie's) All because Viv would sell her whole soul before she even remotely considers painting characters like Blitz and Stolas out to be the one's in the wrong.

- Takes Stolas out of the hospital completely, erasing all the drama/tension Western Energy had and proves that that episode was utterly pointless.

- Turns Striker from an interesting complex villain to a Saturday morning cartoon goon.

- Proves to us that Crimson is just a flat tool and gives us more prove that the world building rules Viv set up in season 1 legit don't matter.

-Ruins Blitz/Barbie's feud now because now you're making Barbie look like the one in the wrong since the fire was an accident. God forbid a female characters emotions in this show are justified.

But if you want my more in depth rants, it’s under the cut! (There’s a lot so bear with me lol)

- As usual WAAY too many sex jokes and swearing. It gets annoying and repetitive at times and some of them distract from the main plot. There’s a long and I mean LONNG dragged out joke of Fizz talking about Ozzie’s dick, then later saying he’s hard when Striker has a gun to his head, as well as Blitz making a joke about him and Fizz making out once they hug. Again, Viv can’t be serious for 2 seconds without an unfunny shitty gag. I genuinely wonder if Hazbin is ganna be like this, where a character is in a life threatening situation or a deep dark serious scene happens only for the next scene to be sex related.

- This is one of those “shit happens because the plot demands it” and it shows. Crimson and Striker COINCIDENTLY meet up with each other, and Fizz and Blitz just so HAPPEN to be in the same exact area they are. Viv wonders why we call her shit a fanfic and this is what we mean, when she creates wild wacky plots and focuses more on THAT rather than the actual character writing. This entire episode hinges on a useless poorly last minute planned kidnapping plot that didn’t need to happen. Also way to once again make the characters idiots so the plot can happen, cause Fizz KNOWS Ozzie worries for him and that the Greed Ring is dangerous, yet purposefully puts the spotlight on him.

- Stolas did NOT need to be in this episode. The plot completely ignores the fact that he was in the hospital the last time we saw him, and he’s only here for Stolitz banter. You’d think that a character admitting they have feelings for someone would be a big deal but he just flat out says it and it’s so underwhelming and feels half assed with no weight to it. Fan comics have made more dedication to this than Viv has. We're supposed to believe him too despite the show failing to actually SHOW us this. Same for Blitz ranting about how “nice” Stolas has been to him, laughing at his jokes and liking his posts…hey Viv, can we actually SEE that on screen so it’s more believable? Or are you only determined to show them sexually flirting? 😑

- Once again Viv felt the need to shove a B plot into this episode and this one sucks because it’s just two characters sitting and doing fucking nothing. It felt like Viv had no idea what to do with Stolas and Ozzie, and I refuse to believe that Ozzie just sat there knowing Fizz was in danger. If anything he would have said “fuck the paperwork” and went to save Fizz himself. Way to show that gif of Ozzie getting mad as a sneak peak to get fans excited, only to see that Ozzie spends the rest of the episode sitting in a dark room LMAO what a let down.

- Ozzie is weirdly chill and cool with Stolas and it’s something I don’t get. While he did say that Stolas had the real “spirit of Lust” in S1E7, it still gave you the impression that he was also more poking fun at Stolas rather than respecting him. The whole point of House of Asmodeous was that Ozzie outs him and publicly embarrassed him. Stolas literally was intimidated just by Asmodeous’s mere name, and hid his face around him. It seemed like Stolas certainly didn’t want someone like Ozzie to know about his private life especially since they’re both part of the Ars Goetia. Now here Ozzie is just cool with him and it feels like a missed opportunity for their dynamic.

- Stolas confessing his feelings about Blitz also makes…no sense narrative wise. I thought the whole point of The Circus and the ending to Western Energy was that he was realizing that Blitz didn’t like him that way and was finally waking up. I thought that’s why he was doing this whole crystal deal in the first place, so he can let Blitz go, yet the show keeps flip flopping and insisting that these two love each other and are good for each other. It’s really making you realize how this season and the previous stuff set up is becoming nonsense because the writers retcon EVERY damn episode. Also….why the hell is Stolas telling Ozzie his feelings for Blitz? Out of all people, why is it Ozzie, the person who outed Stolas and embarrassed him. Why is Stolas even respectful of Ozzie? He has no reason to, and he’s not under the impression that he’s dating Fizz either. I get that he needs the crystal but mentioning his love for Blitz makes no sense.

- Striker and Crimson teaming up to kidnap Blitz and Fizz was such an ass puller last minute decision. It feels overwhelming and underwhelming at the same time, more because it feels like Viv has no idea what to do with these two villain characters other than give them something evil to do to start the plot. Also…why…are they working together? It feels so random.

- Striker’s character especially is all over the place. First he’s working for Stella, then he’s painted as the best assassin in hell, and now he’s…looking for more work I guess and working for Crimson? Why? Does this guy even have a motive anymore? It feels like his character is just dangling around until Viv wants to use him for another wattpad kidnap plot and it ESPECIALLY shows when Striker escapes for the THIRD fucking time. Can this character/storyline actually GO somewhere or are you just going to keep introducing him and have him run away. 🤦🏽‍♀️

— How did Crimson not know who Striker is despite him being labeled as “the most popular assassin in hell”, and how the hell does Crimson know Ozzie and know all the information about him being in a relationship with Fizz?? Oh right because we needed the plot to happen somehow. Still, even if Crimson did know that Ozzie was the "weakest" and loved Fizz, (which….what about Beezlebub?)) he still should have known he was playing with fire. I get that he's supposed to be evil and intimidating but how could he have predicted that Ozzie would actually stand down and fill out the paperwork? He could have immediately came there and killed Crimson for all he knew. It's just distracting how..not planned this shit was.

- Fuck this episode for calling Striker a supremacist. It makes no sense?? Viv is trying SO hard to villainize him despite him being the one in the right and it pisses me off. He has every right to be mad at the upper class, he’s part of the lower class that we’re said Hell takes advantage of, but god forbid we call out Rich and powerful Stolas because that would mean he’s a b-bad person and we can’t have that complex morality! This is so not a “eat the rich” story and it shows bc Vivzie is rich as hell. Striker as a character deserves so much better man. Congrats writers, you had an interesting character and motive set up for him, now he’s nothing but a silly goon that you might as well kill off already cause you clearly don’t care about him. Crimson meanwhile is just a piece of paper, a boring plot device I could give less of a shit about. I thought his motive was to go after Moxxie, now he’s just doing fuck whatever because this show desperately wants a bad guy for their filler fanfic plots.

- We get more world building issues, Ozzie and Fizz are so determined to hide their relationship for obvious reasons, but then at the end of the episode just say “fuck it, no one would dare tell anyway”. So now they’re being open about their relationship and lmao I told y’all the newspaper scene of Ozzie being called out for being a hypocrite wouldn’t go anywhere. Even if Ozzie did threaten his workers to not tell, they can’t be so sure that someone wouldn’t see or snitch, it’s kinda a retcon too cause they were pretty lovey dovey in Ozzie’s. Still, it makes the characters look dumb and it makes the rules Viv set up for Hell once again not mean anything.

- We finally get to see Fizz’s backstory in action and it’s executed in the most underwhelming way possible. It’s literally a fucking 10 second clip of what went down, and rather than experiencing the event for ourselves, it’s in flashback mode but with Fizz’s voice talking over it. That’s it. I’ve seen fan comics/fanart that built this shit up better than Viv did, that actually took the slow time and dedication it needed, and here it feels like such an afterthought, like Viv could care less. Maybe if this actually was a character driven show like Viv claims, Stolas, Striker, and Crimson would be taken out of the picture and then that would leave us with PLENTY time to actually explore and develop Blitz/Fizz, bc most of this episode is just them pettily bickering and Stolas and Ozzie sitting around. But nah, we gatta have our fanfic kidnapping plot. Same goes for the reveal of Blitzo’s mom dying in the same fire. Glad to know that she got the same treatment Moxxie’s mom did, where we don’t even know her and yet we’re supposed to feel moved and care about her death. You nailed that one Viv. 👍

- I predicted that this episode would victimize Blitz and have the fire incident be an accident, (because Viv is a pussy writer and can’t make her characters actually do bad things like god forbid) but I never thought they’d actually have the balls to have Fizz forgive Blitz immediately in the same episode and pull the “actually turns out that horrible thing you did to me helped me in a way”- trope. Biggest flaw of the episode, fuck you Viv. I was actually going to applaud Blitz for taking accountability, but then the dialogue reminds you that an abuser wrote this, and he shifts his apology to “okay but I lost something too see so it’s not all about you” as if he’s fucking dismissing Fizz’s trauma and making it about himself. “I love flawed characters” my fucking ass. I would have smacked a bitch if I was Fizz because Blitzo loosing his mother in the fire too isn’t an excuse?? Fizz lost his fucking ARMS AND LEGS, and at the end of the day Blitzo STILL KNEW HE WAS HELPLESS IN THE FIRE BUT LEFT HIM BEHIND. He could have gotten help and came back, but didn’t. If this were a good show Fizz would have threw that apology back in Blitzo’s face and said “I don’t care if it was an accident or not, you still left me there and then proceeded to loathe me for years”. This is why Helluva will never be Bojack cause at least characters in that show who got treated horribly by him knew when to say “no, fuck you.”

- The episode retcons again, this time they make it out to be that Blitz TRIED contacting Fizz the years they were apart but no one would let him see him. Then they say that Fizz actually WANTED to see Blitz but assumed he didn’t want to, so their entire feud was solely because of miscommunication?? Number one, show don’t fucking tell omg. And number two, that makes ZERO sense. Blitz talked badly about Fizz in Loo Loo Land, and when they finally reunited in Ozzie’s, it was clear they fucking loathed each other. You got the impression that Blitz was petty and jealous just because Fizz was more popular, and Fizz not only loathed him for the accident, but liked to rub in his face about how much of a big shot he was. They literally do that in this episode too, so the episode is literally contradicting itself. Blitz and Fizz had multiple chances to meet up with each other, you can’t just say “oh they couldn’t because no one would let them”- So which is it? Did they hate each other because of bad blood, petty drama, or that they thought the other didn’t want to see them? Pick ONE Viv and stick to it, but she never does. Their feud was interesting and now you ruined it just to have some sweet happy ending. “Adult mature show” my ass lol.

-Bottom line is Fizz shouldn’t have forgave Blitz so easily, or forgave him period. I find it funny how he says “it’s hard to just forgive you” and then he literally does lol. I feel so bad for Fizz fans, him and Blitz’s feud was honestly interesting, so to see all of this go down in a half-assed piss poor way as if this was Care Bears is….wow. The fan interpretations had more thought and care put into this storyline but what else is new lol.

- I’m really tired of these shitty annoying songs. If you’re going to get Broadway actors, please put effort into your songwriting and actually have them sing something good, not something that’s literally nonsense. This Fizz song sounds like it took less than a minute to write and Sam Haft was just thinking of anything he could think of at the top of his head. Also Why the fuck are Striker and Crimson just STANDING there while Fizz sings. They look like idiots, just SHOOT them omg. If this were a funny show, Fizz would have started his first note and Crimson just rolls his eyes and pulls his gun out.

- Fizz and Ozzie kill the lawyer but not…Crimson? Despite Fizz knowing what ring he’s in and even Ozzie knowing what he looks like? Same for Blitz, he doesn’t try to make sure Striker is dead. I get that the plot demands for these two to still be around, but there’s a way to keep them alive without making the main characters look like fucking idiots. Also Stolas just leaves without doing or contributing anything to the plot yay.

- Fizz: “Let him have it, you could say he’s earned it”— Uhm….Nope. Blitz did NOT earn shit. He didn’t even earn Fizz’s forgiveness. Last time I checked, the moment Blitz cried and said it was an accident, Fizz forgave him, knowing he didn’t mean it. What effort did Blitz do to “earn” that as well as the crystal? Because he saved Fizz and didn’t leave him behind for the SECOND time near the end?? Cause if so than the bar is extremely low. That’s the bare minimum, just because Blitz cried and felt bad about it doesn’t mean he should be let off the hook Viv. I hate this so much, what a shitty conclusion, it feels forced just so Blitz can have the crystal and just so the writers can once again paint him as the one in the right. It’s almost insulting that they make it seem like Fizz was in the wrong for assuming Blitz starting the fire too, same for Barbie.

God what a shitty day it is to be a Fizz fan, I’m sorry. The episode did NOT do him justice. Fizzarolli deserved better than that half assed gaslighting apology for someone who lost their arms and legs man, and I’m tired of the show letting every character suck up to Blitz and Stolas for their horrible treatment just because they feel bad. Not only that but the episode (as most recent HB episodes) was a huge time waster. Everyone was really hoping for an in depth walkthrough of his character/backstory but again, when he’s not with Ozzie, the rest/most of his screen time is dedicated to him being helpless and pointlessly arguing with Blitz, plus a long dragged out nonsense song that didn’t need to happen. It felt like SO much time was wasted when we could have used the runtime we have to dive deeper and see more, like….again it would have been nice to see Fizz’s life AFTER the accident and how he became well known as well as how he fell in love with Ozzie, but his backstory is briefly scratched upon in a single scene and that’s it, all because Viv wanted this filler plot and wanted to dedicate more time to THAT rather than actual character expansion/development, something we could have got had you took out Stolas and Ozzie’s B plot and Striker and Crimson.

Viv is so on her way to murder/ruin every character that isn’t Blitz and Stolas and I won’t be here to watch further. I’ll check out the Mammon music video thing but that’s it man, this show is going off the rails, Adding Fizz to the character adoption list!

[houpss]

Dawg I’m actually begging crying on my knees for you to do a reverse version where like reader dies protecting skz 😭😭😭 ofc obvi no pressure, like only if you’d like to 🙏🏻🩷 you write so well im like obsessed

ububububu.....I'm very pleased to hear this! thanks for the idea, love 🩷🫂

I'm eating strawberries and crying, I literally feel bad about this job 😭😭😭

SKZ's reaction to your death ver. hyung line

maknae line

It pains me to write this work, my heart breaks and I begin to believe in this nonsense... BUT REMEMBER THAT ONLY PERSONALITIES ARE TAKEN FROM THE REAL SKZ, EVERYTHING REST IS FICTION!

Bang Chan

It happened...suddenly.

Chan returned home before you, he wanted to cook you dinner and then turn on a new movie that he recently found.

He knew that you were stuck at work, so he wasn’t too worried.

An hour has passed... you're gone, but you should be back by now. Two hours have passed, Chan is nervous.

He called you, you didn’t pick up, he called you so many times, but you didn’t hear.

At two o'clock in the morning he receives a call on his phone. He jumps out of bed, hoping it's you calling, but it's just an unfamiliar number.

He picks up the phone, he just hopes you're okay.

"Are you Bang Christopher Chan? I'm sorry..Y/N Bang died."

Chan thought it was a joke, a very unfunny joke.

He can only come to consciousness when he sees your body. Road accident, you didn't survive.

He will ask Changbin, Jisung and Hyunjin to come out quite aggressively, because they came with him.

He ran his fingers over your pale face, tears forming in his eyes. Impossible.

He strokes your hair, strokes your hands, stopping at your fingers...he squeezes your hand tightly. Why did you leave him?

Tears fall on your lifeless body, you would be very upset if you saw Chan crying.

They can only drag him out of your room in the morning, he didn’t want to let go of your body until the end, it was like he was possessed.

"No, don't take me...I have to stay with her! I don't want to be taken away from her"

"she’s probably so cold and scared... she’s alone there, she’s already lifeless.”

He blamed himself, he could have taken you away from work, but why didn’t you ask?

The exit from the hospital is filled with reporters and paparazzi, the shocking news shocked many: “Model and Actress, Bang Chan’s wife Y/N Bang died in a car accident.”

Thanks to the members, they protected Chan from reporters and endless paparazzi. Chan did not walk behind as usual, but in the middle, and a ring was created around the participant.

Chan doesn’t remember anything, he just cried, he cries so much and loudly.

The members refused to leave him, although he asked so. They went to the dorm.

A day has passed... two days have passed... a week has passed. Funeral.

He remembers everything very vaguely, he was the last one to kiss your forehead before the coffin lid was closed.

Now he is completely alone.

He eats very little and hardly leaves the room. Minho literally force feeds him.

Your photos are open on his phone, you are on his wallpaper.

He doesn’t want to live without you, he wants you so much.

His tears never dry, he cries constantly. There are no emotions inside him, he is dead.

He looked through your correspondence... his heart ached madly.

He just loves you so much, he loves only you.

He apologized profusely to your family, it was his fault.

In the end he won't cope and he will leave for you. Chan was found hanged in his room. There was a note on the table with the words: “I can’t live without her, I’m nothing without her... forgive me.”

Lee Minho

People come and go. The simple meaning of life

But you couldn't leave him...not you

If you loved, then you would not have left...WHY DID YOU LEAVE HIM?

Overdose of antidepressants.

He found you in your apartment, you were lying on the bed, wrapped in a blanket... you seemed to be sleeping, but your heart was not beating.

What if he had found you earlier?

He would have stopped you.

He found a letter next to you... your last will and love for him

"𝐈'𝐦 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐤...𝐈 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐰"

"𝐈 𝐜𝐚𝐧'𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐲𝐦𝐨𝐫𝐞, 𝐇𝐨"

"𝐈'𝐦 𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐈 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐦𝐚𝐝𝐥𝐲. 𝐈𝐭 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐛𝐞 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐞."

IT'S NOT EASIER WITHOUT YOU

He has been crying for several days in a row. Even the members can't pull it out.

He became so aggressive and closed.

His heart rotted and broke without you

He falls asleep with your sweatshirt on, with your perfume on it.

The company releases a statement that Minho is taking an indefinite hiatus from activities.

He wants to close his eyes, open his eyes and have you next to him.

He went through many treatments with you and visited many psychiatrists.

You smiled at him so much, so what happened?

Minho cried for the first time in front of the members, everyone was broken with your death.

After your death, he smoked for the first time.

The cigarette smoke calmed him down at least a little. And in your dreams you came to him, you talked to him a lot.

He became very closed off to himself, even Jisung couldn’t get him to talk.

Everything and everywhere reminded him of you

Your bottle of perfume...your drawings, your rings, your elastic bands, your sweaters

You would curse if you saw him like this.

Only a month later, after your funeral, he dared to pick up your phone.

To mom, dad and sister: “I’m sorry that I’m so weak.. I would like a better life for you, I wanted to live better and happier. I’m a bad daughter.”

To SKZ:"Sorry...be strong, you are world stars and become even more popular..."

To Minho:"I repent of you, I hate myself for what I did. I have about ten minutes left...And in these ten minutes I will continue to love you, Lee Minho. Maybe we will meet in the next life?"

The emotions he had been holding back burst out.

He screamed, his scream deafening the silence.

Physical pain in his heart pierced him. how the bitch it hurts.

Now he's wearing your big jacket.

“Please protect me, Y/N.”

SEO CHANGBIN

"Police lieutenant Seo Y/N was shot..she died while intercepting a drug gang. The ambulance did not have time to arrive"

What did he just hear? Why are they saying your name?

Is this a mistake? Maybe they got it wrong?

He refused to believe it until he was asked to come to the morgue to identify the body.

Yes, you were lying there...a bullet in the forehead.

Changbin turned away, he couldn’t look at you. He's scared.

Probably then he realized all the pain, he stopped living.

Felix and Seungmin forcibly dragged him away from the morgue.

He was never against your work, he was just proud of you. Of course, his wife is a police lieutenant.

He knew it was dangerous, but could anything bad happen to you?

"Changbin, she died a hero, please...be the same hero for her."

There were so many people at your funeral, why did they all come?

Changbin felt lost, Chan was holding his hand. Changbin couldn't navigate the space.

Time doesn't heal anything, remember.

He lost the desire to exist

He hated your job after your death, it's all your damn job.

Will you protect Changbin? Are you his guardian angel?

From time to time he hears your voice.

He will come to your parents and ask for forgiveness.

Really, forgive him.

He will take your dog with him, it seems... the dog really misses you, where is his owner?

Changbin doesn't like music anymore, he stopped working out, he stopped eating.

"Y/N would be upset if she knew that you wanted to leave the group."

"She told you to create for the sake of people's happiness."

"WITHOUT HER THERE IS NO FUCKING THIS HAPPINESS..."

You would like him to continue writing and working.

He will stay for your sake... and for the sake of the members, these three months they kept him afloat, he literally clung to them.

Your dog now has 8 caring men

Changbin brings red Lilies, your favorite flowers, to your grave every week.

Hwang Hyunjin

You have been married for five years, recently celebrated your anniversary.

You were the happiest couple! STAY blessed couple , the participants were incredibly happy about your couple.

You found out that you are pregnant.

Hyunjin was incredibly happy! Members will become uncles to your baby.

Felix took the place of godfather.

Chan and Minho were responsible for choosing the name.

And Changbin, Jisung, Seungmin and Jeongin made rooms for your baby!

But...you had a back injury, which made it dangerous to give birth.

You didn't care, you were going to have the baby.

Difficulties began immediately during contractions, Hyunjin was with you all the time.

He was forced to leave the room in the middle of labor.

The members who were waiting in the corridor were very worried.

Sudden silence.

The doctor came out of the maternity room and said: “Congratulations, you have a daughter... please accept my condolences, your wife has died.”

What?

It sounded so absurd.

Hyunjin walked into your room, you looked so tired...so sad. sad aphrodite.

Hyunjin kissed your forehead, one hand on your neck, the other holding your hand.

"Thank you for daughter...and forgive me, I love you very much"

Tears rolled down Hyunjin's cheeks, the tears were like pearls.

Hyunjin went home with the members.. The workers left your daughter in the hospital for several days.

Hyunjin seemed to understand nothing, he understood absolutely nothing.

"The baby will grow up in love, Hyunjin"

"We will all take care of her..she is an extension of Y/N" These words from Chan hurt Hyunjin's heart...He will protect and love his daughter.

Hyunjin is always crying, his eyes are red, his face is swollen from crying.

It hurt even more when Seungmin brought your favorite coffee.

In three days we could pick up our daughter.

All eight participants went to the maternity hospital.

They brought out a small package for you, what a tiny little thing.

Hyunjin looked at the little baby as if he were the eighth wonder of the world, the girl was sleeping. Hyunjin could have sworn that she would look like you.

"We'll call her Viyoung" Why is this in tune with Vendetta?

The guy nodded approvingly, tears flowing down his cheeks again.

The members took turns holding the bundle with the baby in their hands.

"I will love you so much, Viyoung...just like your mother loved you."

“Your uncles will take care of you...you will grow up with complete love.”

They went home, everything will be fine. Your memory will never fade away. Hyunjin will raise a beautiful daughter. She's a copy of you, but with Hyunjin's eyes.

[sugar-crash]

🏎️Turbo (Wreck-It Ralph) x (gn) Reader🏁

(First Date Edition!)

(Picture’s not mine)

(Request here! This song is getting popular all of sudden for some reason?? Like I’m glad it’s getting the recognition it deserves it just surprises me how quick songs get popular. Already brushed upon this idea but getting into deeper detail is something I’m all for ngl)

- Again he’s not much of a date guy, not wanting to put much effort into anything, having the idea that just because you guys are a thing now he doesn’t need to... He’s an idiot if I haven’t established that fact enough.

- He eventually gets it through his thick skull that doing nothing romantic with you is unacceptable and slowly attempts to be more of a boyfriend and not some guy you hang out with and kiss in private.

- Dates with him even after his “mind-bending epiphany”, there’s an effort now but it’s executed in a very lax manner, like getting you some food after hours and chatting with you while sitting on the roof of his kart.

- I think sometimes dates are either planned or rather spontaneous in a “may as well” kind of way, like, you’re here, he’s here, date time.

- His stubborn nature tends to make him insist on having dates in either his own or older games for the sake of being somewhere familiar… This is understandable but he never frames it that way, calling a game you suggest you guys go to as “brainless” among other things.

- He takes great pride in his game so it’s one of his main hang-out spots, usually orbiting around the idea of simply staying in Turbo Time and showing off his large and ever-growing display of trophies to you for the umpteenth time.

- That cocky part of his personality lets itself known during your dates… Honestly lets it be known in general so not much of a difference, except he’s trying to get your attention rather than other people.

- A more covert part of himself yearns for your approval, seeking it whenever the chance arises, he realizes dates give him a reason to get it. Becoming more keen with the concept as he gets your undivided attention.

- I think the first official date between you two was in Turbo Time, again not a very romantic one but there was an effort and he expects to be rewarded for it, kisses are acceptable payment.

- Bring some food with him so you two aren’t just sitting there doing absolutely nothing… It’s kinda awkward at first because you two are just eating in silence for like a good minute before someone breaks the ice and that innate ability to talk about stupid things between the two of you is activated.

It probably ends with you guys kissing in his kart, a surprisingly pleasant end that is quickly ruined when a smug look makes its way onto his face and you have to push his face away with a scoff.

- Has a tendency to belittle anything else you have planned that doesn’t include him, calling them inherently stupid under the guise of a joke… A very unfunny joke.

- He’s a bit (really) toxic if that hasn’t been hammered in already, having the ugly habit of only thinking about himself and what others could do to help him.

- You’re no exception, taking him a while to adjust to having to think about you and what you may think about something, with those dates being a good example of that.

- His downright horrid perspective is baffling and shows you how this guy was created to be a winner, just not a noble one.

- Talking about winners, I think he calls himself as such when talking about your relationship, especially after this special date and high off of the emotions it warranted from him.

- That date specifically is the start of an era between the two of you, really puts things into perspective for Turbo— That now he isn’t as invincible as he originally thought, that there’s things beyond just winning.

- It wasn’t about winning in the first place, it simply gave him what he craved the second he got the taste of it when his game got its La first-ever quarters by a gamer whose name has been long since forgotten to him, power.

- Those attempts I think in a way give him this idea that “following the program” is something he doesn’t need to follow, he’s Turbo— And having a relationship with someone so… Different to him is something his programming was initially opposed against, only for it to work for you two… For the most part.

- He’s Turbo and can do whatever he wants with you by his side, whether his intentions for the natural order of things around him are good or not.

(Kv fvb lcly aopur aoha aol nhtl johyhjalyz pu Dyljr-Pa Yhswo kylht vm zvtlaopun tvyl iba ulcly cvpjl pa?)

[wntrs0ldier]

An Offer · part 05

pairing: mob!bucky x reader words: 4,4k warnings: typical mafia (dark themes, language, violence, etc.)

<previous part | next part> | series masterlist

series summary: When your father dies, the only thing you can do for your family and the empire he built, is to marry a powerful man.

chapter sneak peek: “It's time for you to go, I suppose. Is that correct, boy?”

You nearly winced at how patronizing Michael addressed Bucky. It was almost insulting, meant to put Bucky back in his place. He, however, looked composed, but you got to know him well enough to be aware that he would rip Michael's head off if the opportunity arose.

At first you saw it as a nightmare, the meeting with John Walker. No matter how many times you told yourself you were fulfilling your duty to the Family, fear, uncertainty and stress were the only things that duty brought you. Yet, given the darkest scenarios swirling in your mind, and memories of the meeting with Brock Rumlow, John seemed like a really decent type. 

He invited you to dinner to one of the most expensive, top rated restaurants in the city. To get in, it was usually necessary to make a reservation several weeks in advance. Suspecting that his highly influential uncle had a hand in the whole venture, you appreciated the effort anyway. You were surprised, however, that John didn't give up, didn’t take the path of least resistance, despite the fact that you hadn't shown any interest so far. 

Without being gross or intrusive, he complimented the red dress you wore; asked about your work and hobbies, didn't mention business. You felt like you were on a real date, moreover, a nice one. Seeing that jumping from Brock to John wasn't going from bad to worse let you feel at ease. For the first time in, it seemed, an eternity.

Despite everything, there was something missing. You had no desire to throw yourself at John, no curiosity about what his lips tasted like. Essentially, you didn't need that in an arranged marriage, but guessed there will be time for everything. With Bucky, though, time was necessary – all you needed was a single look. But he wasn’t an option.

“Wow, that was… beautiful,” John claimed after you laughed at the joke he told. In reality, you were amused by how unfunny and stupid the joke was. Perhaps the consumed alcohol and the pleasant atmosphere also played a part. 

“Well… Thank you,” you said, lifting a glass of wine to your lips. When you emptied it, John immediately came with a refill. “Don't you think we should talk about business?” 

“What exactly do you want to talk about?”

“How would that work,” you suggested with a casual shrug. “You haven't mentioned an agreement yet, so I suspect you haven't prepared one. That's a bit…” You hesitated, wondering briefly if you would offend him with your choice of words. “Strange, considering, you know, the nature of our profession.”

John smiled, then hung his head and shook it. “I guess we'll just have to trust each other. Not to sound like an asshole, but I've heard that Rumlows have backed out. At least for now. If not them, your father's business will be ruined, leaving your Family with nothing. I also know that Stark has started to turn his nose at your partnership. You’re in a bind, Y/N. And I want to do this the easy way. No complex agreement, just some basic arrangements.” He raised his hands up in surrender.

You were struck by how honest and straightforward he was. Fair to both of you. 

“But… Why?” You asked quietly. “Why are you so nice about it?” 

“You don’t know?” He pretended to be surprised. “I've always wanted you, and now I have my chance. I don't want to do it through a system of rules and punishments. Not too bad, right? And taking charge of what your father created will help me strengthen my position.”

There was a moment of silence as John gave you time to process what he just said. Soon, however, he grabbed his glass and raised it for a small toast.

“So, what'll it be? Can I keep trying or are you giving up on me?”

It was clear that he wasn't really offering you a choice – you could only decide how to play it; keep John at a distance, or make it easier for him to approach you, let him court you.

Having clinked glasses, you both drank the wine, but you could barely taste it. Only the bitterness that the future was to bring. At this point you thought you were prepared for a marriage without love or at least friendship, but the closer you got to one, the more panic you felt. Being aware that the whole situation was difficult, you still didn't expect such a burden.

“Don’t worry,” John added, seeing the concern on your face. “Maybe one day you'll love me. Maybe when kids come along.” He shrugged. Your eyes widened, but John didn't mind it. “What? Someone will have to take care of your father's legacy in case we're gone, don't you think?” He smiled sincerely. You wondered if he was already fantasizing about the future with you. 

Destroying the atmosphere with the shock you experienced wasn’t part of your intentions. The only right idea was to kill the negative feelings with a little more alcohol, so you asked John to refill your glass again, and he did so with pleasure. While dipping your lips in the wine, your eyes wandered mindlessly around the room until they landed on a familiar face – the last person you expected to be here.

You choked, and the sticky drink dripped down your chin. A momentary, barely noticeable panic crossed Bucky's face as he watched you carefully from his table – as if he was concerned that you might have choked to death. However, he stayed in place; rushing to help you would have exposed him.

“Oh God, are you all right?” John handed you a napkin right away, which you accepted and wiped your chin with a few delicate taps to avoid washing off your makeup. 

“I’m sorry. Gone down the wrong way,” you struggled for breath. 

“It’s fine. Are you sure you're all right?” 

“I’m okay,” you said, still feeling the aftertaste of wine deep in your throat. “Excuse me for a moment.” Grabbing your purse, you got up from the table.

“Of course.” John also stood up from his seat, watching you walk away towards the toilets.

You put your bag next to the sink and focused on your reflection in the mirror. Tears, which filled your eyes as a result of choking, smudged your mascara, and the wine – just as you suspected – ruined the foundation on your chin. Yet, you weren't bothered by the poor condition of your makeup. Your thoughts revolved solely around the fact that you just saw Bucky. You would’ve been tempted to treat it as a mere coincidence, if not for him staring directly at you. It was probably his intense gaze that drew you in that direction.

The door opened, and at this point you were ready to see anyone; you wouldn't be surprised if your father decided to come back from the dead and show up here. But it was just Bucky. Again.

“What are you doing here?” You grated, crumpling a used piece of paper towel in your hand, with which you had wiped the remnants of mascara from under your eyes. 

“Are you kidding me? The wine almost came shooting out of your nose, I had to check on you.” His forehead furrowed.

“I’m not talking about the toilet! What are you doing in this restaurant?”

Squinting, Bucky thrust his hands in his pockets, and sized you up. 

“So?” You pressed, the tone of your voice impatient. 

“You really think I'd let you come out here alone?” He finally let out. Your battle ready attitude had eased somewhat, but Bucky was surveying you sternly. “You gave me your permission to protect you, remember? So I’m trying to do that.” 

“But John wanted this meeting to be more... private.”

Bucky rolled his eyes, taking a deep breath. “And nobody found that unusual?” He sneered. “You shouldn't drink that much,” he added after a moment, slightly changing the subject. 

Your brows snapped together. “I drink exactly as much as John.”

“Yeah, except John is three times your size,” he said unmoved. “Look, I'm not stopping you from anything. Drink yourself unconscious if you want. I'm just saying you should be careful around guys like John Walker.”

The urge to ask him to elaborate on the thought crossed your mind, but you didn't really have the time. You didn't want to arouse suspicion by spending too long in the toilet.

“I’ll be careful,” you promised with a sigh. “See you later..?”

Bucky's face softened with surprise, his eyebrows rose slightly. There was no trace of the earlier toughness. “Sure.”

The corners of your mouth turned up with all the tenderness you had for him. You grabbed your purse, then left.

When you returned to your table, John greeted you back with a smile – but it wasn't a smile that melted your heart, or one that caused the butterflies in your stomach to go wild. It wasn't Bucky's smile.

When the black SUV pulled over near the Barnes' mansion, you thanked the driver and dismissed him, assuring that you would be fine if you needed to get home. You left the car, reached for your high heels, which you had taken off immediately after being picked up from your date with John, and closed the door behind you. Having spotted Winnifred right away, you made your way to her. She must have been tending the flowers in front of the house up to now, as you could conclude from her gloves and knees, dirty with soil.

“Y/N, how lovely to see you again.” The warm tone of her voice and the friendly look on her face didn't allow you to even consider that she might be insincere. And although you didn't get to know George Barnes personally, you presumed that Bucky and Josephine inherited their gloomy, ironic, a bit dark and sassy way of being from him. “What brings you here, sweetheart?”

“I came to see Bucky.”

Winnifred grinned even wider. “He is at the back of the house. In the garage,” she said after a brief quietness, which she spent observing you. That's probably why you didn’t move a step. “Oh, your fathers would absolutely love it.”

Smiling tentatively, you gave her a questioning, slightly confused look. “They would..?”

“Our oldest was a boy, your parents’...” She motioned at you. “a girl. So when you and Jamie were younger, your dad and my George used to joke all the time about pairing you two so that everything could stay in the family. But it was just a joke,” Winnifred emphasized. 

Was it, though? Given the world your fathers came from, the environment you and Bucky grew up in, and the situation you were currently in, was it just a joke? Perhaps it was the alcohol talking, but you began to wonder what would have happened if your father was still alive – would he have let you settle down on your own, without Brock or John's presence, or would he have married you to Bucky? 

He wouldn’t. Because Bucky didn’t want to get married. He didn’t want you. 

There was something else bothering you. You already knew that your families were close, yet you had no memories that would prove it. “Why did you stop being friends? If I may ask…”

“It's no mystery,” Winnifred said lightly, smiling. “You know how your mom is,” she began. You guessed that politeness prevented her from saying directly that your mother tended to be paranoid, but regardless of her choice of words, you nodded. “I think she got scared that our husbands would actually turn words into action. She made it clear that she wanted a lawyer, a doctor or an estate agent for you. But it seems that, despite all the odds, you and Jamie found your way to each other anyway.”

You felt your face turning red along with the heat spreading in your stomach. So you weren’t wrong; it was in your blood – the affection you had for Bucky. No wonder you two clicked the moment your eyes met. However, in this situation, it was like a curse. 

“You have a beautiful garden,” you admitted to break the silence and, above all, your own thoughts. In fact, Mrs. Barnes’ garden looked a little bare, incomplete. The flowers were just beginning to bloom.

“It is promising,” she agreed. “But I’m done for the day, it’s getting late. Why don’t you come in? I’ll make us some tea.” 

“Oh, thank you.” You shook your head. “I was supposed to see Bucky, so… I should go.”

“In this case, I’m not keeping you.” Winnifred beamed at you. 

Keeping in mind the place where you expected to find Bucky, you headed to the back of the mansion. Evening dew had collected on the freshly trimmed lawn; not the most pleasant experience to your bare feet, but you preferred it to uncomfortable high heels, which probably wouldn't have handled this soft ground anyway. There was a peace and solitude that was lacking where you lived – there were no cars, no lights of street lamps, no noise of the city.

The garage was not difficult to locate; especially as there were quiet sounds indicating someone's presence. 

Bucky stood in front of a lifted hood of another vintage car. But instead of focusing on the vehicle, your thoughts wandered uncontrollably to Bucky's broad back as he was leaning forward, probably working on the car’s engine. His muscles were clearly visible under the tight fabric of his t-shirt. You felt your mouth watering.

He raised his head slightly, as if listening for something, then looked over his shoulder. He didn't say a word, but returned the favor by fixing his gaze on you – his eyes darkened with the same rawness as when he saw you in your house that night. Beginning from your bare feet and slowly moving up, he scrutinized your whole body, studying the curves of your thighs, hips and breasts. And you couldn’t blame him since your red dress was even tighter than his t-shirt. 

Letting out a shaky breath, you got rid of the excess air churning in your lungs. “So, you like old cars.”

“Yeah,” he admitted, keeping his eyes on you. After a while, however, he focused on the vehicle. “That one belonged to my old man. I don't want it to rot here.”

Based on how Bucky responded to Brock's mention of his father, you presumed that George Barnes was a sore subject. So you were surprised, maybe even a little touched, that he was now bringing it up himself. You did ask him, but he could brush you off or say nothing.

Driven by some subconscious need to be closer, you took a few mindless steps and stood not far from the vehicle. It was colder inside the garage than outside, so you instinctively folded your arms, trying to keep as much of your own warmth as possible.

“What car is that, exactly?” You asked genuinely curious, eyeing the cream body. 

“Chrysler. From 1970.”

“What about your Mustang?”

Bucky squinted suspiciously, smiling. “The Mustang is a year older…” He answered hesitantly. “You’re into cars, too?” 

“Not, but-” You let out a quiet laugh, knowing how you were about to sound. “This era was the sexiest for cars. And it suits you.” 

His eyebrows rose with astonishment. He shook his head, then got back to the uncovered engine. “This was the most twisted compliment I've ever heard.”

“You’re welcome.” You grinned, fluttering your lashes. 

Having checked out your surroundings, you concluded that the inside of the garage wasn’t interesting enough for you to keep your eyes somewhere. So you dropped them to Bucky's hands. Stained with grease, they appeared to be the hands of a professional; they knew exactly what to do. No accidental, hesitant movements.

“How was it?” He asked. You immediately looked up at his face. “With John.”

“I made a pretty good impression on him, I think. He wants to have babies with me,” you said casually.

Stopping everything he was doing, Bucky tensed at your words, a muscle in his jaw twitched. “And you? Do you want to have babies with him?” 

“Looks like a baby-free deal doesn’t exist, so if I have to…” You shrugged. The alcohol in your system kept you from panicking at the very thought. Or was it Bucky's presence that had that effect on you? After all, you felt safe around him, so no prospect seemed so frightening. “Why don't you have a girlfriend? Or a boyfriend?” The question suddenly left your mouth, because since it popped into your head, you decided to satisfy your own curiosity right away. “You are attractive. Very attractive. Protective, maybe too protective…” You squinted. “But people, especially girls, like it. You can be really funny if you want to, you have money and position. And some pretty cool cars.” 

“What’s with all these compliments?” Bucky raised his eyebrows. 

“I get flirty after wine.” You waved your hand dismissively, not intending to continue with this particular topic. “I remember you were, well, a ladies’ man.” You pressed your lips together; you wondered if you should have used that term. It's not that you didn't think it was accurate - you just didn't want to offend Bucky, or upset him.

But he looked at you, smiling with a softness that in no way matched the whole situation. “You remember me?” He repeated. As if it was the most obvious thing, you nodded in response, your forehead furrowed. “I didn’t know you were aware of me.”

“Don't change the subject.”

Bucky sighed heavily, but did not answer straight away. “I liked being around women. Still do. But in a different way. I’ve changed, I guess. Matured, realized a few things. I had a lot of time to think over the last two years.” 

You listened to everything he had just shared and, despite your drunken boldness, you didn't have the courage to bring up his father's death again or to find out more about the lessons he had learned over the mentioned two-year period. You decided to grab onto something else. “In a different way? What do you-”

“That I don’t try to sweep them off their feet, or wrap them around my finger,” he said calmly, but there was something in the way he was talking to you and, for a second, you felt like a scolded child. “I don't hit on them, I don't flirt, I don't try to be charming or funny. If they want to fuck, we fuck. But I'm not looking for an opportunity to take someone to bed.”

Overwhelmed by the information you wanted yourself to hear, you didn't know where to look. “Mhm…” You murmured, trying to appear completely relaxed, maybe even indifferent. On the other hand, you presumed your cheeks that turned pink gave you away. “And you…” You began, partly to talk about something else, partly out of pure curiosity. “Do you remember me? From back then?” 

Bucky loosened up a bit, a smirk crept across his lips. He reached for a piece of cloth slung over his shoulder, and got rid of the grease off his hands by wiping them thoroughly. “Maybe,” he answered, shrugging. It was clear he was teasing you, and you wondered if it was some kind of punishment for bothering him with personal questions. “Watch your fingers,” Bucky warned gently, so you took a step away from the car, then he closed the Chrysler’s hood. “I’ll drive you home, huh?”

When the car finally stopped near the familiar building, you breathed a sigh of relief – you were only a few steps away from a warm shower and a comfy bed.

Before you could touch the handle, Bucky's hand wrapped hastily around your forearm. You turned your gaze to him to see what had come over him, and saw a completely controlled unease painted on his face. 

“You know that car?” 

Having followed his gaze, you spotted a vehicle; you did not recall it belonging to Michael or anyone in the Family. “Not really.”

Bucky reached into the glove compartment above your lap and pulled out a gun. It was only then that you felt a sprouting anxiety; not out of fear for your life, but at the thought that something might happen to Bucky because he'd decided to get you home.

“Come on,” he said, and there was nothing but calmness in his voice. 

You got out of the Mustang and joined Bucky on the other side of the car. 

“Stay behind me, okay?” he instructed, and you didn't protest only because you didn't want to sabotage the possible plan he had formed in his mind. You nodded, and just as he asked you to, you kept two steps behind his back.

You cautiously entered the house, Bucky keeping his gun low but unlocking it earlier, his finger close to the trigger. It was dark inside, except for the warm light pouring out of the living room. It was also where the quiet conversation was coming from; you recognised Michael's voice, and it put you a little bit at ease – you didn't think he was in danger, or that you two were the ones who were threatened. You touched Bucky's arm gently to prevent a potential reaction. 

As you approached the living room, that’s when Bucky really tensed up. Seeing Michael in the company of John Walker wasn't exactly a delight for you either. No one needed to speak; it only took a few glances for the atmosphere to thicken in the blink of an eye.

“Y/N,” Michael’s displeased tone pierced the heavy silence. “What is he doing here?”

“Making sure she gets home safely,” Bucky asserted before you had a chance to think about who Michael actually had in mind. 

“From where?” John interjected; he sounded casual, amused even, but his edgy smile said otherwise. “Should I feel threatened?” His question, thrown around as if playfully, only confirmed your assumption that John was unsure of his position.

“No, of course not,” you protested right away.

Michael could have drilled down. However, you could see that he didn't want to do that – he didn't want to raise doubts about what you were doing with Bucky; to give John a reason to back off. All he cared about was putting an end to the subject as soon as possible and not returning to it – making it seem forgotten at least. “It's time for you to go, I suppose. Is that correct, boy?”

You nearly winced at how patronizing Michael addressed Bucky. It was almost insulting, meant to put Bucky back in his place. He, however, looked composed, but you got to know him well enough to be aware that he would rip Michael's head off if the opportunity arose. 

“Correct,” Bucky agreed. He held his gaze on Michael for a while longer, then, a brief glance was everything he got for you, and it felt cold – like when he left you in that pub. You watched him walk away, but Michael's grunt brought your attention back.

You didn’t stay with Michael and John. Hiding behind a long, tough day and pouring honey in their ears by telling them you didn't want to disturb an obviously important discussion that your feminine mind wouldn't comprehend, you got away. Still, there was something bothering you. So, not long after the desired refreshment and making sure Michael was alone, you went down to the living room.

Michael peeked at you, looking up from his newspaper, waiting patiently for you to raise the matter on which you had come here. 

You sat down in the armchair next to his, and for some reason, nervousness led you to occupy your hands with the belt of a soft, fluffy robe you wore after the shower. “Why was John here?” 

“To speak about business,” he said immediately, still focusing on the paper. 

“Right, let me put that differently…” You sighed, rubbing your forehead. “Why do you think John was here?”

This time Michael did not answer straight away. Nor did he appear to be thinking about the answer; his eyes roamed over the next lines of text. “I believe he wants to control you. Keep an eye on his investment.” He closed and put the newspaper down on the end table between the chairs, then looked straight at you. “Do you want my advice? You'd better let him,” he said. It wasn’t the content of his words that caused your forehead to crease, but the determination with which he said them. “At least two candidates backed out after Bucky beat Brock. Men are afraid to approach you because you got yourself a guard dog.”

At least two candidates, and you had no idea about that. 

“He didn’t beat Brock because of me,” you protested. 

“But he did it. They don't know the details, they don't need them. All they need is that it happened at a meeting that should have ended with marriage. Instead, it ended with Brock Rumlow's broken nose. Of course,” Michael continued. “There were those who were encouraged by it. Who thought it must be a game worth playing. But I turned them down right away, because only a fool would think he stood any chance with Bucky Barnes,” he almost spat. Then, he took a deep breath to release the tension. “He would be a perfect candidate, you know?” 

Although you had lowered your head somewhere during Michael’s monologue, you now raised your eyes to him. Your heart was racing, gaining a familiar, nearly furious rhythm. 

“The friendship of your families, the power and reputation that the name Barnes holds… And it turns out that Bucky Barnes is the only man in New York who doesn't fight for your hand in marriage.” Michael smiled bitterly. 

You looked away to avoid having to face Michael. You crushed under the weight of the awareness that his words had aroused in you. Experiencing far too many emotions at once – you felt angry, sad, disappointed and even a little betrayed – you were hopeless as never before.

“I know that this is difficult,” Michael spoke again. “However, we can't lose John. We can't be sure there will be more better candidates, and even if there will be, we don't have enough time. I don't know what you got yourself into with Bucky, but he can't protect you until he becomes your husband, which he has no desire to do. So whatever is going on between you two has to stop. Now.”

“What does that mean? I can’t see him anymore?” You asked, your voice weak.

“You don’t have to run for the hills each time you accidentally meet him,” he clarified. “But whether you continue to be friends will depend entirely on your husband.”

a/n: feel free to share your thoughts, they are more than welcomed 🥰

taglist: @goldensunflowe-r @nefri-black @vickie5446 @learisa @sjsmith56 @aya-fay @hhiggs @wishingwell-2 @buckysgirl01 @emily-roberts @prettylittlepluviophile @leaaa008

[rachmob]

I saw "in your eyes" (I couldn't take it anymore and I have tons of work to do these days)

Don't read if you haven't seen it yet.

The ship sank. 

It was painfully slow, for some unexpected, for others not. 

The materials were good but maybe the wrong ones. Still, we made it afloat and got many to join the adventure. 

We added new things to the boat without knowing that it would make the sinking worse, but I don't blame us for wanting to make our trip more comfortable. 

To be honest, it felt more like a fire that ended with an explosion at the end. We always had emergency boats and yet there were many who did not use them, including me. 

We try to put out the flames of a ship with highly flammable objects. 

I don't judge those who left in time, I just hope they don't judge me when I return to land with the remains of what I admired now embedded in my skin, I just hope they understand that that ship was full of people who saw great things in it. 

From the beach I will see the fire put out, I will see the blue sea consume it and in the morning remains of it will begin to appear.

Remains that I will never forget. 

And in his honor I will continue forward, creating and dreaming. 

I won't let this whole experience be thrown away so easily. 

*Tense music*

And…

If for any reason…

The ship is saved by some “””””GOD””””... because it was all a “””””prAnK”””” or thinked “”“wouldn't it be funny if ?!?”””” then don't expect me to come back just like I was before…

Don't expect me to be the same after all the pain YOU UNFUNNY LITTLE MORON PUT ME INTO 

[mirai-e-jump]

TV Guide & TV Station Magazine (Kansai Editions) ft. King-Ohger Cast Interviews for Adventure Heaven (translation below, spoilers)

TV Guide: Half movie talk (beginning), half fun free talk (second half)

TV Station: All movie talk . . . _

TV Guide (page 38-39)

Sakai: The film has wonderful guests such as Shido Nakamura-san and voice actress Ayane Sakura-san. The interaction with them left a deep impression on me.

Watanabe: There's a scene where Gira (Sakai) fights with Reiniol, who is played by Shido-san.

Sakai: There's also a scene where it looked like they were performing tsubazeriai (crossing swords and getting in each others faces).

🕷️Ikeda: Was it really intense when you faced each other?

Sakai: It was too intense! The atmosphere created the moment the cameras started rolling was beyond overwhelming, and it almost felt like I was being "swallowed up." I thought I was going all out, but I guess I wasn't. When we decided to do one more take, Shido-san said, "Come on!" He was very enthusiastic.

All: Whoa~!

Sakai: It feels like I'm only half joking, but he created an atmosphere that said, "Come at me again," I was able to give it everything I had.

Murakami: During the filming of Gira's coronation, I had an opportunity to talk with Sakura-san, who played Devonica. We all had the chance to talk with her and noticed she has a really nice voice.

Hirakawa: It almost resonates.

Murakami: We learned a lot about voices. She performed various voice patterns in front of me, such as low, high, resonant, straight, and a voice with an emotional range. It's an experience that only you can only see in this film.

🐝Kaku: Like the TV series, the CG in this film is amazing. We were surprised to see such original backgrounds, which are even more beautiful and fantastic than those in the TV series. As we watched it on the monitor we were amazed while going, "Oooh." I hope everyone can experience the scale of this film at the theater.

Hirakawa: I think the story is enjoyable, and contains a strong message.

🕷️Ikeda: I would like to encourage you all to see it on the big screen, as I'm sure you'll be impressed by how it evolves from the TV series in so many ways.

Sakai: It's been about half a year since the TV series started filming, and everyone in the cast is naturally getting closer to each other.

🐝Kaku: (to Murakami) You've been making alot of funny faces recently, right?

Murakami: Eeeh? you noticed?!

🕷️Ikeda: When you're tired right? (laughs).

Murakami: Mainly when I start my "engine," or when I'm sleepwalking. Sometimes it seems as if I'm not listening to what others are saying. The other day, Aoto-kun was holding a bottle of water and saying something weird like, "If you want this water, you have to pay 1,000 yen."

Watanabe: If you cut that just that part out, it sounds like a totally unfunny joke! (laughs)

Hirakawa: I'll start from the very beginning (laughs). Aoto-kun walked along a muddy road in the heat to get water for the film site.

🐝Kaku: It took about 20 minuets.

Hirakawa: That's why he jokingly said, "1 bottle is 1,000 yen."

Murakami: But I had just woken up from sleeping and was still feeling abit fuzzy, so I accepted what he said with as normal with a, "Thank you," while making no comments (laughs). If I were my normal self, I would've been more careful and said something. But in this worksite, you can be relaxed without worrying about anything.

Sakai: Lately, you've even started to make yourself laugh (laughs).

Murakami: I was able to train myself, since everyone is so good at boke-tsukkomi (double act)

🐝Kaku: My arms, are up (banzai) (laughs).

Hirakawa: It's about relationship trust. You can go big, because I think everyone will pick up on it.

Sakai: That's right. If you say something, someone will surely pick up on it.

Murakami: Thank you.

Sakai: Finally, which of the 5 countries in the story would you rather live in?

Murakami: I'd want to live in the country of Toufu, where Kaguragi (Kaku) is a Lord. I think it'd be really fun being one of the his citizens, because it's full of hospitality and delicious foods.

🐝Kaku: If there's filming in Toufu, rice is always served.

Hirakawa: Their rice is very tasty. I'd like to live in the country of N'Kosopa, where Yanma (Watanabe) is King, and I'd enjoy my life relying on technology. I want to leave everything to the machines and say, "Take care of me."

Watanabe: Although it's not depicted, I've always thought that there's a sauna in the country of Gokkan, where Rita (Hirakawa) is the King. That's why I want to go to Gokkan, for the sauna.

Hirakawa: If I ordered it, they might make one, but it's too cold to bathe in the open air of Gokkan (laughs).

Watanabe: I see (laughs).

🐝Kaku: For me it's Queen Hymeno's (Murakami) country of Ishabana. If I have an injury on my knee or shoulder and I want it to be healed, it'd be easy to do so.

Sakai: I think I could become macho.

🐝Kaku: Yes, yes. I'm sure you're doing a lot of health research on that.

Sakai: I'm not…

🐝Kaku: Say Toufu.

Sakai: Maybe Ishabana…

🐝Kaku: Why not?! (laughs)

Sakai: Maybe it is Toufu. I like the country side feel of the place! It's like there's nothing there…

🐝Kaku: "Nothing." That's a bit harsh, isn't it? (laughs)

Sakai: I'm joking, I'm joking (laughs)

🕷️Ikeda: For me it's N'Kosopa. I want to play games with Yanma and win.

Watanabe: Oooh~ sounds good!

Hirakawa: Well, It's a tie (laughs).

🕷️Ikeda: Shugoddam isn't popular, huh…(laughs).

Murakami: Shugoddam is a country full of small happiness, but many forms of it.

Watanabe: But, if I were to bring my camera, I would take it to Shugoddam. The architecture there is beautiful.

🕷️Ikeda: It's a European-styled town…and what do you mean "if you bring a camera?" (laughs)

Sakai: The question was "if you want to live there." (laughs)

_

TV Station Magazine (page 96-97)

"Bonds of the Young Kings"

Sakai: The first film for Ohsama Sentai King-Ohger will be released, and when I first read its script, I was very excited to see how the coronation of Gira would turn out, and thought alot about how I would act out his responsibility as king.

Watanabe: When I read the script for the confrontation scene in the film's climax between Gira and Reiniol (Shido Nakamura), the first King of the Kingdom of Death, It made me remember my audition. At that time, I was asked to watch a confrontation scene between Gira and Racules (Masato Yano), and Gira truly looked as though he was shining. As for myself, between the two of them, I was more influenced by Reiniol's way of thinking this time, but even still, I want the children to see Gira succeed.

Murakami: There were multiple scenes in the film where I thought I saw a new side out of all six of us. I wasn't sure how the scene where Hymeno meets her parents in the Kingdom of Death would be executed, so I prepared myself alittle for that part before we started filming.

Hirakawa: I was curious how we would film Gira's coronation and, on a personal level, how we would express a side of Rita that they had not shown before in the TV series. I was looking forward to it, but was also a little worried about possibly ruining what I had established so far.

🐝Kaku: I was very excited about the whole story, including the development of Gira's determination to become king despite hesitating. There are scenes where Kaguragi touches on his past mistakes, and It makes me understand what kind of mindset he had when he became king, so I can't wait to see how it plays out in the film.

🕷️Ikeda: I was honestly impressed by Gira's words. Going to the Kingdom of Death made me think a lot about the meaning of my life and, "what does happiness mean?" I think you'll be able to realize it, that even the smallest of happiness is such a wonderful thing.

Murakami: Between takes, I had a chance to talk with Ayane Sakura-san (Devonica), and she showed me how she does her voice in various patterns while right in front of me. It was a unique experience that can only be seen in this film.

🐝Kaku: The whole film was shot with green screen, but the backgrounds of the world were more magical than those found in the TV series. I was truly impressed by how beautiful the CG was.

Sakai: I think it was the scene where Shido-san and I are fighting. I wanted to go all out, but I guess I was alittle nervous, and the scene lacked some impact. When they decided to shoot the scene one more time, Shido-san said, "Come on!" he was very encouraging and created an atmosphere of excitement. Thanks to him, I was able to give it my all.

🕷️Ikeda: The cost of Gira's coronation has become a hot topic for some time. It's really cool, isn't it? It seems to be one of the main points this time.

Sakai: I also thought it was cool.

🐝Kaku: Also, the fight scene at the end is cool. Saying famous quotes before battle.

🕷️Ikeda: I think the film shows off everyone's good sides, such as how a king is supposed to act.

Watanabe: The part where each king confronts their past, Hymeno's scene had additional dialogue at the end, didn't it?

Murakami: I added the lines.

Watanabe: That part was really well done. I personally thought it was cool.

Murakami: I didn't know how it was going to turn out, and I was also worried about it, so…thank you (laughs).

Hirakawa: Gira, Yamma, and Rita perform actions in their pre-transformation stage. We worked hard on it, and I think it came out looking cool.

Murakami: I also really like the way in which Kaguragi confronts the past Queen.

🐝Kaku: Thank you. The scene with Yanma and Shiokara (Chiwata Yuhei) is also interesting.

Watanabe: Gira is both very straightforward and cool, so I hope that children will think, "I want to be like Gira too." With that, I hope you'll come to the movie theater with your family to see it.

Murakami: Each line has its own message, and feels like it has weight to it, so I would be happy if you could feel them as well.

Hirakawa: I think the message is very strong as the kings face their past. The story is also connected to the TV series, so I hope that you;ll enjoy.

🐝Kaku: The production of the film is different from that of TV series, so I'm sure that when people see the film, they'll think, "King-Ohger looks very interesting."

🕷️Ikeda: The world view of King-Ohger will evolve further and will definitely impress you when you see it on the big screen, so please come and see it.

Sakai: I would like you to see the determination of each king on the big screen. I'd be very happy if you could come to the theater to see this film, which we put alot of effort into. We look forward to seeing you!

[flower-boi16]

My Thoughts on Hazbin's First Episode

So Viv just posted the first episode of HH a day before the actual show was supposed to release for SOME REASON and I decided to watch it. Here are my thoughts;

The characters are...ok? Charlie and Vaggie are fine, Nipsy is kinda cute and funny, Alastor is also fine, and Angel Dust sucks.

Speaking of Angel - so far his one character trait is that he's extremely horny. And most of his jokes are NOT funny.

The episode got a handful of laughs out of me but was mostly kind of unfunny.

The camera work gets VERY weird at times. The episode constantly cuts to different perspectives and it becomes kind of a headache to look at. It is especially bad at the beginning of the Happy Day in Hell song - where they constantly cut to different perspectives all the time throughout the beginning of the song. It gets better after that but the camera work is still very wonky at times.

The animation is fine - not amazing but it is at least pleasant to look at.

Its REALLY clear now that they are going to make Hevean evil, which is kind of a good or bad thing depending on who you ask. Personally, I thought it would have been more interesting if Hevean wasn't evil like I previously said.

There's kind of a contradiction here; in the opening exposition dump, Charlie says that the reason why Hevean does the exterminations to ensure that Hevean never rises up against them; but then later in the episode when she is pitching her idea to Adam, they go back to the overpopulation in hell problem as the reason why the exterminations are happening - and Charlie says that the hotel is meant to solve the overpopulation problem - when she knows that the real reason why Hevean does the exterminations is that Hevean doesn't want Hell getting more powerful - its weird that the episode just creates a new reason for why the exterminations happen but then goes back to the old one.

Don't care for Adam as a character so far, I don't hate him but I also don't find him that entertaining of an antagonist so far. Also didn't care for his song primarily due to the lyrics.

The episode doesn't really introduce anything - like there's an opening exposition dump but it doesn't introduce you to any of the characters, it just kind of expects you to watch the pilot first even though the pilot isn't canon.

In terms of positives - I liked Happy Day in Hell as a song.

Like I said, most of the characters so far are fine aside from Angel Dust. They aren't amazing but they're fine.

The subplot of Vaggie trying to create a better commercial for the hotel was cute.

So overall the episode was...ok? I didn't really love it and it showed clear signs of issues that would probably plague the show in the future, but overall I didn't hate it. There was some enjoyment I got out of it but still not great or even that good. Probably a 5-6/10 though I'm kinda leaning more towards a 6/10. It's just average to me.

[employee052]

ozzies long-ass TSP ramble

For context, a few days ago i was in a thinky mood when i watched this video on Valve catwalks. it mentioned death of the author, and while ive heard of it, I didnt understand what it meant until after the video explained it. So i got thinking. the following was a series of messages I sent to my friends on a discord server im in (with the exception of the last part bc i just thought of it now even tho im sick) that i compiled for yall into sections so its easier to read. these are just my thoughts and could be totally wrong, i just wanted to share aksjdh :P (plus this is my second time im posting this so there might be some inconsistencies)

(ramble under the cut so yall dont get a massive wave of text on your dash)

"smth smth death of the author smth smth reviews smth smth interpretations smth smth skip button"

like idk if this was obvious to everyone else n im just finally getting it or not, but the skip button ending being about the narrator seeing the negative reviews causing him to create the button in order to appease them, which said reviews ended up making him believe he was being preachy and obnoxious and unfunny, but as a result, he ends up believing it and trying to appease those interpretations rather than be more confident of his dialogue and what it means to him(whatever he may believe) and ending up dying at the end bc of it being a kind of literal version a death of an author of sorts

---

im just thinking about how timekeeper/settings person/432/whatever is really only interested in the player, but not stanley himself. and if the narrator ends up dying (or decaying at least in my interpretation) during the skip button, could the same be said about stanley as a character as well?

like we never see stanleys model as us, we dont see his feet when we look down, and the only time we see him in game is either as a hand during the bucket escape pod ending, the mariella endings, and the not stanley ending. and the last two are cutscenes. for all we know, stanley could have died at some point during the skip button after the narrator did and we would never know bc we cant see him

but since 432's desk being at the end of the epilogue which happens post skip button ending, i would have said that was the first time we ever see him interact with the game internally rather than asking for the time. but i do remember someone suggesting that the timekeeper was the one who removed the door in the skip button in order to kill the narrator off and get stanley/the player away from him in order to talk more

with that thought in mind, that would mean TK had to kill stanley and the narrator off in order to be able to lead the game, push beyond the barriers of a narrator and character and just talk to the player, one on one

---

it makes me wonder if what the curator said in the museum ending holds more weight

like, she talks to the player as well. both she and TK talk to the player themselves instead of stanley the character. and when she says "When every path you can walk has been created for you long in advance, death becomes meaningless, making life the same. Do you see now? Do you see that Stanley was already dead from the moment he hit start?"

stanley's function is a character in the narrators story, a literary device to propel the game forward. the narrator makes the race track, and stanley drives. without the narrator where would stanley go or do, without stanley who would move the story along?

"Can you see? Can you see how much they need one another? No, perhaps not. Sometimes these things cannot be seen."

and yet, hes dead, just like the curator said. because no matter what, he's never going to be able to truly make his own decisions. the confusion ending lays out how all the endings are scripted despite what the narrator believes and acts, its all predetermined.

and in a sense, the narrators dead too. no matter what stanley tries to do to change the story, or the narrator changes to the game in order for stanley to react to, its been planned long in advance for the eventuality. every word, every event. and with stanley's deaths, it ends up just bringing them back to the beginning again, "What exactly did the Narrator think he was going to accomplish?" if they always come back to the same preplanned paths, to the illusion of free will, it doesnt matter regardless. death doesnt become a statement, it becomes an inconvenience.

"But listen to me, you can still save these two. You can stop the program before they both fail. Push escape, and press quit. There's no other way to beat this game. As long as you move forward, you'll be walking someone else's path. Stop now, and it'll be your only true choice."

The only way to save both Stanley and The Narrator is by not letting the story play out to begin with. To beat the game, which means to let the game end after you win.

and yet,

the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is never the end is neve-

In a game where there is no ending that stops the game in its entirety, where everything will keep on happening again and again and the end is never the end, the only way to beat it is to make a choice as yourself the player, not stanley the character.

because he doesnt get a choice, the narrator doesnt get a choice. they think they do, but they dont. the only way to beat the game is to not play it. (which makes sense given that there are achievements involving not playing the game in both the 2013 HD remaster and 2022 Ultra Deluxe)

both Stanley and The Narrator are two sides of the same coin that make up The Stanley Parable, and the only way to use the coin is to give it away.

maybe thats why the true ending of the game with credits and stuff like that, is the Not Stanley Ending.

You the player have successfully broken the fourth wall from the outside in, even though that ending was planned like all the others (ie, the game allowing you to disconect the phone), you break the illusion of being stanley the character, which the game ends up booting you out of stanley as it cant handle the "narrative contradiction".

maybe thats why the escape pod ending has the sign that reads "both the player and the narrator must be present in order to leave". its not stanley, its the player, us.

maybe thats why that ending is one of the most cruel. the only way to get there is to leave the narrator trapped in the boss' office. there's no way to get him to the escape pod. the end is never the end.

---

(this part was the new idea i just had today so this might not make sense i appologize)

going back to the beginning of this ramble about the death of the author and such. perhaps there is a way to get the narrator out.

with thoughts about interpretations and with he idea of the "death of the author", all of us have our own interpretations of the TSP characters. whether its design, or relationship wise, or characterization, or what have you. The Narrator in my head is different from you reading this, and that narrator is different from another persons perspective, and definitely our narrators are different to the one that lives in Davey Wreden's head, or Kevan Brighting, or anyone who has even heard of the stanley parable.

and that's not a bad thing! there can be many similarities to the characters that our interpretations share, some more common than others and some that make no sense at all, but for the most part we all have different interpretations of the characters.

I read a book called Book Simulator (The Reader's guide to not reading) by Chris Yee on stream once. The VOD is gone now. But I discovered the book because I heard the guy writing/the narrator of sorts for the book was written like the Stanley Parable Narrator.

It didnt help that Kevan brighting voiced over the commercial for it too askjdh

but back to the book. this will contain somewhat spoilers for it since it brings up a moment at the end of the book so feel free to stop here if you dont want to be spoiled

---

basically, in Book Simulator, Booksi (The book's instructional narrator on how to fake read at the start of the book) is arguing with The Narrator (no not ours, but the general narrator who speaks in the third person), however, its revealed by The Narrator that Booksi has a plan to take over the world by inhabiting more book simulators and distributing them across the world. But, the reader could kill off the booksi that they have in their hands that they are reading, to quote:

"Or was he the original Booksi? Maybe not. Maybe the original Booksi had been vanquished long ago, and the reader was now facing one of the many copies roaming the world. Both Booksi and the Narrator knew the answer to this question, but neither would reveal the truth."

---

Taking from Book Simulator the concept of multiple iterations of one character existing in different copies of the media they originate from, maybe in a way that's how the Narrator may die in the stanley parable, forever stuck to repeat the same endings with the illusion of free will, but he lives on somewhat for everyone that has seen or heard of him in any capacity.

this may sound a bit preachy (oh the irony) but bare with me:

The Original Narrator from The Stanley Parable is dead, dead in the sense that he and Stanley are stuck within the game, given the illusion of free choice, and unable to leave nor do anything to try and escape, is also alive in the sense that we the players perception of The Narrator lives on in our minds.

The Narrator from the game might be stuck, but the Narrator i see in my head, the one i designed and draw and think of is perfectly fine and alive as ever.

and the same goes with you and anyone else who has heard of the narrator. their interpretation is still unique and different to them even if it all comes from the same media. he may not be exactly the same as the original, but hes still there. and in a way, hes free.

(man typing this last segment down makes me feel like a gd priest, and/or someone talking abt the barbie movie akjdhkjasdh so sorry if doesnt make sense at all :P)

[quartings]

A little story about how I became me:

In the most supportive way I can say it, my thoughts on what people need to hear to become better, and why it's not always obvious.

Like pretty much everyone, I was a dumb teenager many years ago. I grew up in a very conservative environment, without many chances to really hang out with people who weren't also teenage guys either. I was surrounded by a lot of homophobia, sexism, and a lot of people telling jokes that weren't just horribly offensive, but even worse- they were honestly really generic and unfunny. And that's a small part of why I'm here to talk about.

For anyone who followed my blog in its earliest years, you might know I was a huge fan of the Yogscast YouTube group as a teenager. I loved Simon, and Lewis, and Duncan, and Kim, and so many of its members. But there was one member who was quite different from the others- a woman named Zoey.

Zoey Proasheck was one of the first big openly gay YouTubers I think ever. But what made me gravitate to her so much was that while she never downplayed that part of her identity, she promoted the positive stereotype-breaking parts of her personality even more. She's honestly not just one of the nicest content creators I've ever seen, but maybe even the nicest person I've ever seen. (And I know she doesn't like being put on a pedastal because celebrity worship is bad and all people have flaws, but I think her positive actions and impacts should at least speak for themselves) As a dumb teenage guy who at the time had never even met an LGBT person, it was eye-opening experience watching Zoey RP as characters who liked guys, and play kiddie games like Scribblenauts, Pokémon, and Puyo Puyo.

Dumb teenage me would have been under the impression that lesbian YouTubers would only promote queer content. Disclaimer that I'm not promoting the "model minority" argument, minorities are not obligated to act a certain way in order to earn respect or not be bullied. This is just a story about what it took to change me as an individual in a way that may not apply to everyone.

But yeah, just as her straight coworkers played games and expressed their interests that didn't telegraph their sexuality, most of Zoey's content wasn't either. It was nice seeing such an eternally kind, funny, and creative person just enjoy sharing her happiness and creativity with others, and her liking girls was just an added detail. Some highlights include her just joking about wanting to meet pretty girls in Scribblenauts, expressing her love of rainbows, and just saying 'boobs' because it's a funny-sounding word. And those bits while funny, were only a fraction of the overall funny and creative content she made that was for all audiences! Zoey was never a person who was there to lecture others on her identity, or to create content only for people like her. Just because she was queer, it didn't mean she marketed her content only or even mainly for queers- she made it for everyone- I'm happy so many LGBT youth found solace with her, too. But if she did try and make content solely or mainly for queer audiences, myself and others like me would probably have been dissuaded from watching her channel and having our worldview expanded.

But yeah, after watching Zoey for so long, slightly-jerky teenage me had a small space in his heart open up for accepting queer people. Because no matter what harmful stereotypes I saw on TV, no matter how many actual people fit those stereotypes in online spaces or irl, I would always know that if a real queer person as eternally kind and funny as Zoey could exist, being LGBT couldn't possibly be the factor that makes people "bad" as all the fearmongers say.

This next part will probably be tough to hear for a lot of people, but I don't think representation in media matters the way many people think it does- at least, not in the realm of animation and acting.

What I mean by that is, I was raised on well-written and amazing female protagonists as a kid- Kim Possible, Lilo and Stitch, My Life as a Teenage Robot, The Proud Family, Totally Spies, ATLA, and especially the girls of the Teen Titans. But because I was raised in an environment that was very oppressive towards girls and one that deliberately isolated guys from them, I had no good female presences in my day-to-day life. No amount of strong female characters in media could change the fact that my irl view of girls was shaped by the very conservative and honestly disappointing ideals of the girls around me. It took moving to a vastly different environment where I could interact with less conservative girls for me to start unlearning the misogyny instilled in me during my early teens.

And in the same vein, no amount of fictional LGBT characters would have undone any homophobic beliefs I used to have back then. Because I know such characters aren't real and don't reflect the values of real people around me. What actually contributed a lot to me becoming less homophobic was Neil Patrick Harris as Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother. If I only grew up on gay actors being allowed to play gay characters, my mind would never have been allowed to separate them from the shallow stereotypes I was taught as a teen. Neil Patrick doing such a great job of playing a caricature of a hilariously cartoonish straight guy allowed me to see that gay people aren't bound to always acting "gay". Their sexuality doesn't control their day-to-day behaviour. While such things are obviously clear to people who are also LGBT, I think we easily forget how straight people with literally zero experience talking to LGBT folks don't know these things by heart. Barney Stinson being straight was better LGBT representation to me than all other queer characters thanks to Neil Patrick Harris.

I think a lot of today's dumb teenagers are immediately put off listening to minority voices because they oftentimes come across as a "lecturer" or an "enemy". Someone who isn't necessarily evil, but still a person who views them as a "thing to change" or "person to yell at". And it's hard to give a mean person yelling at you the satisfaction of being right, even if they are right. If someone came up to teen me and started exasperatedly telling me how being homophobic made me a bad person (even though that's obviously true), not even yelling at me, teen me would have been off-put by being antagonised and would probably not listen to them. Heck, teen me may have even become more homophobic since this hypothetical irl LGBT supporter was so antagonistic to me, and the idea of being like them would seem off-putting.

EDIT: And I know certain celebrities have recently come under fire for not openly stating their political leanings. And sure, it's probably because they don't wanna get cancelled, or because they have the privilege to be impartial in situations that impact a lot of innocent people, but there's another detail I want to note. At this stage in the game, I wonder if a celebrity coming out as liberal would instantly turn their entire conservative fanbase against them before listening to what they had to say. Sure, it's probably just the celeb covering their ass, but I can't help but think about the silver lining of a conservative viewer hearing their favourite celebrity saying "hey, most people on the other side are chill to talk to, don't be mean to them even if you think they're really annoying" maybe being more impactful if the celeb claimed to be apolitical rather than openly liberal. You can absolutely chew me out for being wrong on this one if you think I am, I'm just speculating.

I don't at all mean to victim-blame anyone here for not being nice enough to bigoted people. Sometimes people are so hateful that no amount of kindness can change them, and you are well within your right to distance yourself from them or fact check them when they spread hate. What I am saying is that nobody likes being lectured. Not on big things like human rights, not on medium things like airplane safety instructions, not even on small things like promotional giveaways sometimes. I think a majority of people who don't support minorities aren't hateful bigots who constantly rant and rave about getting rid of other people. Maybe 10% of them are like that. But the rest of them are just poor isolated folks like teen me was, who just need that one cool person to show, not tell them that kinds of people they've never met can be cool too.

So what does that mean for me? Well, despite the massive amount of rambling I just went on here, I also don't want to be a "lecturer" in the content I make and how I conduct myself in daily life. I know it's difficult, and I've faltered before, and maybe will in the future. But if by some miracle you're a person who dislikes "wokeness" or "things being shoehorned into media" and you've read this far, thanks! I'm not here to tell you you're a bad person, I'm not here to tell you to change, and I'm not going to say any of my content is "not for you". I'm here to make art and comics and animation for everyone to enjoy. If you're feeling down or even just bored, I hope the things I make can make your day even a little better. I'm not a lecturer, and I hope I'm not an enemy - I'm just here to be a friend. I also have some of my biggest animation and comic projects EVER coming soon, and I really hope you like them!

And to people of all demographics, I want to add that if someone ever makes an offensive joke, there's no point yelling at them that it's "offensive" or "bigoted" or "whatever-ist". What's more important is letting that person know that, honestly? That joke ain't it, chief. It's worse than being offensive- it's honestly kind of boring and predictable, dude. Teenage me probably made that joke 10 times over a decade ago, and my classmates probably made that same joke 1000 times. Don't worry though - I've told lame jokes before too, but thankfully I took the L and my jokes now are honestly getting way better!

Stay safe out there, okay? I hope your tomorrow is happier than your today!

[ang3lofdivinity]

☂𝙶𝚊𝚕𝚊𝚡𝚢 𝙼𝚘𝚗𝚜𝚝𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚒𝚝𝚢☽˚｡

Relationship(s): Hazbin Hotel (Platonic - some Romantic ideas as well) + Acheron!Reader

Format: Stories + Headcanons

Genre: Fluffy goodness, but of course angst is in here as well

Warnings: Spoilers for Hazbin, Spoilers for Honkai Star Rail, Angst, Valentino, toxic behaviors and everything, normal hell activities, swearing, reader is just like Acheron (even with clothes), violence, gore, toxic behavior (ahem that memokeeper), discrimination, suicidal/dark thoughts, emetophobia, cannibalism.

A/N: Wrote this in the night, so this’ll be decently bad…. Um. ALSO. I’ll get to my asks after this, I promise. There’ll probably be a different version of this where reader makes it in heaven / where the reader gets with the Vees :)) - Also.. YOU GET A SONG!!?!,‘Clawed’ hand refers to the claw jewelry Acheron has for you :33 Thank you to @littlewonders7 for the main idea for this fic! Also note: Reader is NOT Acheron, they are only similar. Skin color, hair, etc is up to you (but I decide your outfit. Because I say so.)

Side note: This is mainly a STORY fic, and an overview of where the Reader will end up with some Headcanons, this will be continued in another part because this took WAY TOO long to write.

A rush of pain flows through your head, accumulating a headache which blooms like a flower. A flower thats poisonous vines with prickly thorns wrap around, it creates pounding sensation in your skull that hurts more than you could possibly fathom, furthermore it causes the feeling of a throbbing sensation behind your oculus’s. Luckily enough, it feels as if they’ve been shut tight considering there’s absolutely nothing you can see but pure darkness. However, during your time as a Galaxy Ranger from years ago, to now (where you still have no-one)- you’ve learned to use your other senses if in need of it.

The ground beneath you felt far too warm to be any normal location within any planet you’ve visited so far, or one you’ve been to before as a matter of fact. It’s so.. uncomfortable. So much so that you swear you can feel yourself sweating, trickling down. This makes you believe you’re flat on your back, but you can’t exactly pinpoint on what, and it’s making you nervous. You barely get nervous over things like these.

What were you doing before this?.. 

. . .

“Memokeeper, do you not understand the definition of ‘I wish to be alone’? Have you no respect nor decorum? You continuously insisting on interfering with my personal affairs will do no good for your reputation in my book.” Your voice unintentionally sounded harsher than you intended, but the anger swirling within leaving a bitter taste on your tongue made it all the more infuriating that someone was constantly prodding into your business. It’s.. awkward. The different length high-heeled black boots you’re wearing click against the pavement of the sidewalk, the red parasol you’re carrying covering the glimmering light of the moon, streetlights stationed on almost every sidewalk, along with all sorts playing on the televisions shining down.

The stubborn memokeeper beside you strides along, hands behind their back as they laugh at your, as what they believe, antics.

Barely anyone is walking the streets of the city from what you can tell from the bright florescent lights of lampposts, considering it’s night. There’s barely anyone around you two..

“Oh, please. You think I’d leave a criminal like you freely tread around the city knowing you could kill another innocent citizen here?” Your gloved hand tightened around the handle of the parasol, oculus’s narrowing down at the tips of your heels as you try to relax yourself, feeling your blood boil at their words.

“No wonder you can’t love yourself..” They mumbled under their breath, chuckling at their unfunny joke.

“A Galactic monstrosity like you… I can understand.”

This is what they want: a reaction out of you. You’re not going to submit to their demands.

“Wow. How impertinent and immature of you, █████ ████. Accusing me of a crime which I am merely a suspect in, with not even enough grounding evidence that can actually prove me to be the true culprit. I never thought you could stoop this low.” After your decently blunt words, you attempted to ignore the memokeeper.

Thankfully enough for you, they were keeping silent for most of this walk. Looks like they were getting the hint.

Until their footsteps stop.

And it makes you stop in your tracks, about to turn on your heel.

That is until you feel something slamming against the back of your skull, coupled to the blood rushing through. Stumbling forward, you struggle to keep yourself up on your feet- struggle to keep yourself awake even for crying aloud.

And you can no longer keep your balance.

Gentle fingertips graze against the back of your head where the blood is gushing out as it oozed to the back of your neck, the thick fluid no warmer or cooler than your own skin. No-one was there to witness the crime they had committed. How lovely! You looked to be paling rapidly, collapsed on your side. They rubbed their thumb over their index and middle finger, smearing the liquid on their glove in a circular motion. Staring blankly at your pathetic form- they smiled, resting their blood-soaked hand over the wound which caused a soft lavender light to illuminate from beneath it.

They weren’t heartless. But of course, they weren’t just going to heal you all the way!

Pulling their hand away, they slipped their non-blood covered hand into one of their pockets, pulling out a tarot card: a simple main color, being black, is mixed with intricate golden designs curling around it. But then, they started chanting something you couldn’t make out:

What’s going on?..

. . .

The atmosphere around you feels more humid than ever, not only that- it appears to be very different from other planets you’ve ventured: it’s also choleric, disorderly, and noxious. Though, you’re still alive. It must have something keeping you breathing in this unfamiliar environment.

Your hair is the only thing cushioning your head, still resting against the rough surface of the ground beneath you. Trying to move your arms, you take notice of how heavy your bones feel, like something is restraining them. This could not get any worse. They fall back slack against the surface of the ground, the hot

Furrowing your brows together, you attempt to for your eyes open despite how this migraine is progressing along with the heavy feeling of your eyelids keeping your eyes shut tight. You have to get them open. You have to get up. Slowly, you find yourself cracking open your eyelids just enough that they’ve raised just enough that they’re half-lidded.. which was actually harder than you thought. What the actual hell is going on??

Blurry, almost like a white fuzz effect is causing everything to appear blurry to you. Your pupils start to dilate as you essay to comprehend your surroundings.

Something bright is burning—

Oh wait.

..The Sun?

Or at least, something akin to a sun. It’s only making everything worse the longer you try to stare at it.

Drawing your attention away from the blinding light, you find it lingering on the sky, which is a wine red color and a ribbon red pentagram at the very top, almost like a sigil. Looking at all of this at once made the throbbing migraine slowly become worse, causing you intake a sharp breath through gritted teeth.

It was painful.

It hurt just to be awake in this moment, and you didn’t want that. But does a Galaxy Ranger ever give up during times of confusion and harm?

You want to.

You really do.

Maybe all of this would end, and you could just feel at peace for once in your goddamn life.

Nevertheless, you found yourself forcing one of your arms to move to pinch your shoulder, just to confirm you were in the Reverie hotel and this was just some odd nightmare. But it wouldn’t work. You know that. If this was the Reverie, you would’ve been able to awake in your hotel room, or even in a place like Golden Hour.

The small flash of pain from the pinch was still lingering on your skin, however you could care less in this moment. You needed to get up. With a huff of pain, you’ve propped yourself up on your elbows (despite the long and drawled out process it took in order to get yourself in that position), struggling to keep your eyes open and yourself awake. There’s no point in falling asleep when you’re already up. Plus, you won’t be able to fall asleep once again that easily, unfortunately. It’s by far one the worse feelings by far.

The pit within your stomach, creating a strange sensation that causes unease makes you want to continue to try and rest (even if it’s futile), but you don’t follow it, and instead manage to bring yourself to get on your knees. You’re trying to ignore the aching pain that’s practically taking over your body with every action you take by overwhelming yourself with a singular thought.

The ‘death’ awaiting you when your end finally arrives.

Served on a silver platter.

Huffing, you finally take a moment to let your eyes adjust to your surroundings: you’re, in what it appears to be, a vast and overcrowded city. How overwhelming and inconvenient.

The more you overlook this megalopolis ablaze with neon lights flickering on and off, the more it made you dizzy and worsen your migraine symptoms. Yet you take a deep breath.

You ignore it.

The best you can- at least.

You attempt to keep looking, noticing that some of these signs actually have some words on them- indicating what they have in store for any living person within this metropolis. Casinos, nightclubs, adult film studios, brothels, restaurants, television stations, and hotels are only a few things that you could name. What gets you to tear your gaze away is, what appears to be, a large clock tower glowing ever so brightly glowing with a golden hue as if blessed by the aeons themselves.

In a way, it makes you feel even more sick.

A rotten feeling. Truly.

It hurt more horribly than you originally thought.

…

There’s no ignoring this anymore, you have to find something to relieve your pain.

But you’re in an unfamiliar location.

Realizing you’ve been laying on a warm cobblestone pathway, on the near outskirts of any human interactions.

Where theres far too many individuals bustling around whom you can’t even see from here. But, thanks to the indistinct chattering of people and clicks of the heels of shoes tell you everything you needed to hear.

And what if no-one recognizes you?

Maybe that’s for the better, though. You would much rather have no-one know who you are than at least one person who does (that is, if you don’t have much of an intimate relationship).

The vertigo lingering around has made it that you could care less at this point.

Does this planet have an apothecary somewhere?

A quiet sigh escapes past your lips while your hand glides down to find the hilt of your long sword, which isn’t hard to find considering your position. With a hum of satisfaction, you carefully begin to stand up, the heels of your shoes clicking as you first begin in a lunge to raise yourself up. The vertigo almost makes you loose your balance, yet you continue.

Theres no other option.

You can never turn back — the path behind is gone.

That’s what you’ve always said, after all.

Driving yourself forward, you’re able to fully stand up and be able to take a few steps forward, but not without stepping on something that causes you to look down.

..Your parasol?

Retracting your heel, you take a moment to stare at it. You haven’t broken anything, it’s just almost caused you to lose your balance by the round handle.

Without a second thought, you slowly get down on one knee and grab it by the handle before arising back up from your spot, and open it as it unfurls before you. It feels.. comforting, just to have something that’s a memorabilia of sorts. It makes you nearly forget the other so despondent feelings dissipate. Slightly, that is.

A soft smile graces your lips, letting out a small sigh of relief.

Yet when you turn your head to look back at the very large city… you decide to head on over to one of the more safer looking buildings to find directions, and where to get out of here again. After-all, you don’t wanna be stuck in here longer than you have to be.

You haven’t even finished your mission on Aureon yet..

Not only that, but considering the amount of people after you- along with that large bounty placed over your head.. it’d be best if you didn’t dawdle around some unfamiliar location for too long. Who knows what could happen to you.

The melodic clicks of your heels sound out as you lower your head to look down at the tips of your heels, your parasol blocking out many of the Illuminating lights ahead. As you stroll through the oppressively humid city, you try to remain.. oblivious to the world around you. However, the sound of.. sloshing catches your attention. It’s grotesque… far too grotesque for your liking, and coupled with the rotting smell that hits your nose— it leaves you with an unpleasant feeling that you cannot describe.

It makes you feel physically sick.

Aeons— is someone chewing on something?? Why does it sound so awful? Why is your gut instinct telling you to run away, just anywhere else that isn’t here??? Your free hand reaches down to the hilt of your sword for some form of self-reassurance, trying to think rationally of the situation.

Until you simply cannot take the suspense.

You tried, you truly tried. But those aeon awful noises are making you far too agitated for no reason, it makes you want to throw up right here and now.

Tentatively, you raise your parasol, only to witness some.. far too peculiar things that make you regret ever looking.

Cannibals. They’re eating each-other. The blood spilling from the corpse they’ve violated, and it looks raw. Fresh, brand new for crying aloud. As if they grabbed some random individual to commit these.. heinous acts on. They grip onto the poor victims clothes and now limp body, ripping, gnawing, tearing at the skin as they devour the victim. And nobody even bats an eye. It.. somewhat makes sense as you survey further. All of the denizens here look like goddamn demons the more you look over them. You see things on fire, citizens running all-about the city, and what appears to be on the TV’s are.. less than pleasant to rest your eyes on.

Your eyes widen with terror, trying to comprehend what’s even happening.

It isn’t until someone approaches you from behind do you feel the amount of fear equivalent to when back on your home planet. Back when they—

Before even thinking twice, or at all for that matter about what you’re going to do, which your thoughts are all too fast for your liking as you can’t even catch up. That is, before you use your long sword- still within it’s scabbard, deftly turning on your heel as you slice the individual behind you in-half.

It was an automatic response. An instinct. It’s not your fault. It’s NOT your fault—

Your legs automatically move backward before you twirl around once again and dash forward, making you sprint faster than you’d ever had. You need to make it to that building.

You need to get out of the streets.

You have to get out.

Y̸o̴u̷ ̷h̶a̶v̷e̷ ̷t̷o̸ ̴g̶e̶t̶ ̶o̶u̴t̸.̷

Y̷̛̖̊̆̄́̿͐͌̓͛̓̈o̸͎͆͑͋̂̍̕͘͝ù̷̡̢̱̥͇̟͛̂́̎̏̚͘͠ ̵̧̛̳͉͍̎̎̓̎̏̑͋̄͛͠͝͝ḩ̷̢̛̫͔̗̱̖͑̇̽̄̐̉͛̎̆̋͑ͅą̵̧̝̝̠̱̫͇͚̥͙͍̀ͅṽ̵̟̻͎̰̦̫̺̺̬̦̜̥̗̾͗͆̽́͒͐̚͝ȩ̵̨̢̭͈̳̫̱̱͖̤̠͎̩̐̅̒̔̄͆́͘ ̶̜̯̥͇̣̻̟̝̜̦̀͜ͅͅt̴͈͚͍͚͎͙̫͖͉̬͙̦̋̌͒̉̂̃̀͝o̴̥͛͐̑̌͌͗̎̓͘͠ ̴̘̟̗̰͔̬̮̻̹̘͔̒̈́̔̈́ͅg̷̯̳͙͉͇̮̲̥̃͆͋̃̓͌̅͑̄̍̂͐͆͜͝ḙ̴̄t̶̻͕̗̪̘͌̄̄̀̈́̊̄́̌̈́͐͐̃̐͝ ̷̫̮̗̘͇͚̪̫͖̭͐̂̂̌̓̈́̉́̂̔͘͝o̴̦̰̰̞̜̺̘̺̜͑̂͂͑̄͊͂͝u̶̹̘͙͇̱̜̩͇͉͈̖̲̪̖͙͈̐̌̈́̀̃͛͂̌̒̂̈́̏̉̚͝t̵̡̢͎̟̜̣̗̝̪̬̯̪́͊̑̅͒͛̆́̾̃͐̾̄̌͠ͅ.̸̨̡̩̯͉͇̜̮̤̺̥̘̣̲̇̃͛͌̓̓̈͛

It doesn’t take long till you’re at the entrance, where you dart into a small, tube-like elevator, desperate to escape, just to find solace or help somewhere else before you’ll find yourself in an much more horrible predicament than now. Where you’ll have to reveal something that could be seen as.. more terrifying, perhaps.

As the doors close and the elevator ascends, you can't shake the feeling that you're being watched (because you are. Why is a human-like being here?) where the dreadful sensation of unease washes over you. It makes you lightheaded, or make you feel like it. You move your gaze away to look down instead of outside. Taking heavy breaths, you try to figure out what the hell is going to be your next course of action.

There’s cannibals, no other human-like beings in sight, someone possibly with the malicious intentions come up right behind you, no sort of guards here, no hope.

Damn the apothecary now, you need to get out of this.. hell.



Hearing a small ‘ding’ sound that rings out as you arrive on whatever floor it’s mandated to, you find yourself finally opening your eyes after the countless times you’ve tried at least tried you relax yourself and your racing thoughts.

Your hand instinctively finds itself on the intricately designed scabbard by the side of your hip while your brows knit together as you survey around.

No-one as of currently is around, but this place certainly has to be one of business given the multiple tube-like elevators all stationed in, what you suspect, to be a lounge or hallway of sorts. The dark grey tiles are in-front of each of these elevators, which you also notice to have silver insignia’s at the top of them, with the other part of the tube changing into a ribbon red with the same dark grey colored swirls. There’s red wine tinted windows all around, some in front of you having some sort of badges with similar formatting and designs (specifically with the weapons appearing to be made out of the same materials).

The fluorescent lighting is somewhat dim, which you’re more than grateful for. Though, the fragrance of rich perfume which has been previously spritzed all around, or what it seems, isn’t very strong but- reminds you of some sort of hospital scent… just made with some more sweeter and pleasant oils of sorts. There a red carpet draped down the middle of the floor, where you see some stairs and a double-door meeting room.

Lucky guess?

A part of your mind tells you to approach, yet the other- more rational part tells you to not to.

If anything does try to threaten you, you can always be able to unleash some of the true power you hold. As long as these beings aren’t stronger than you, you should be able to take them.

No?

Exiting the elevator, you quickly tread upon the carpet, one of your hands still resting on the scabbard of your sword. It isn’t until you rest your ‘clawed’ hand against the upper part on one-side of the door, do you feel the cool sensation of dread wash over you.

If you await any longer, you’ll look like a fool and be exiled out with no help (probably).

..You find yourself opening the door, and the dread.. subsides for a moment as you survey the room: there are at least 8 cushioned chairs with a softer pink color with a certainly- detailed design. The long ivory table is placed perfectly in the center with a similar design to the chairs, and a dark grey table cloth down the center of it (or is it painted?… you cannot tell).

Theres a projector screen in the back—

“Unsought guests are not allowed on the premises, let alone anyone breaking in without me or any other authorized being who I trust given permission.”

When you hear another voice, your head whips to the cause of it- behind you. You quickly raised up your sheathed blade in a protective manner as you stare at the being:

They’re unusually tall, with light gray-skinned who has their long white hair with black streaks. It’s styled into large horns by thin, ballerina-like black ribbons.

They have a darker-colored marking that appears similar to a mask on their face around their eyes, which have white irises and red sclera. The rest of their arms and hands are colored white, it seems. Something that sticks out to you however, is with their hands being rather large in proportion to their body.

They wear an off-the-shoulder black dress with white buttons and white stripes located down the front and at the rim of the spiked skirt, which includes hot pink lining. They also wear black waist-length stockings covered by white ballerina shoelaces.

“I don’t trespass on your property with any malicious intentions whatsoever. I am only here to ask for some.. assistance. Nothing much— I simply need directions.” Your voice is firm as you lower your weapon. But, you’re still on guard with your shoulders tense and eyes narrowed.

They look down at you for a moment, almost condescendingly before their eyes drift to your weapon.

“And .. I’m just supposed to believe you have no harmful intentions when you’re carrying that around, and nearly insinuated you were going to harm me?” They raise an eyebrow, an almost repulsive expression on their face. You shake your head, before speaking again.

“Understand that this is used purely for my protection. It has become a habit for me to keep it up, knowing I could never be safe in a clearly different environment. Also note that I don’t even know who you are, nor what.. any of this is. I’m not from here, and purely came for where to find out where an apothecary could be around here. I can say for certain I have enough problems, and I’m not looking for any others anytime soon.” Quick. That’s the first thing that comes to the strangers mind as they realize your situation.

But, you can tell they still don’t trust you enough.

“Sharp tongue, hm? Yet you come here without any knowledge of this place, you say? How can I know you don’t work for anyone and are simply here to try and attack, or manipulate me? Why shouldn’t I kill you here and now?” Folding their hands behind their back, they straighten their posture, walking right past you while you turn on your heel to look at them.

“That is the only thing I implore you for. Directions. Then I’ll be right out of your business. I have to figure a way to get back to the planet I was at and finish my duties there as well, so I’m not even staying here long, I’m… not even sure how I got here.” It’s noticeable that your voice drops in pitch a bit, lowering your head as you rest your free hand on the center of your collarbone.

You can tell they’re pondering something as they stare you down.

Aeons this feels awkward.

Perhaps that’s why the sudden dreadful sensation came back to fully drown you in a cool, empty abyss.

Cold sweat is the first thing you feeling as everything becomes muddled. In your vision, white spots start appearing accompanied by a faint ringing sound that gradually gets louder to the point you think your eardrums are going to bleed. A gasp escapes past your lips as you try grounding yourself.

“..How am I to…….”

You know you don’t have one- but it felt as if you had a fever, which grew hotter much to your distaste, it made you clammy. It wasn’t until you felt like you were going to throw up that you stopped feeling the rise in temperature that very clearly did not stop even if you didn’t feel it.

Although you thought that whatever was starting to wash over you was subtle, the being in front of you immediately took note of your sudden shift in appearance and demeanor.

I mean, if you could just look at yourself: You were doubled over, arms wrapped around your abdomen. The way your eyes became unfocused and you slurred your words, trying to respond to their queries even in your current state. How.. thoughtful.

Perhaps you weren’t working with some despicable organizations, such as the Vee’s.

..yes. That has to be true. How do you have such a human appearance otherwise? You obviously can’t be from here… did a human find some sort of rip between their world and this hellscape? No- how do you have a sword???

What caused them to snap out of their train of thought was the sound of you collapsing onto the floor.

…

Goddamit.

. . .

Jolting upward from whatever this newly soft material underneath you is, you find yourself nearly screaming, yet— you were able to realize while thinking about it more- that it could lead to something more catastrophic. That being, whoever was here could attempt to harm you. Keyword: Attempt. And that would be a hindrance.

You know that if they tried.. you’d be able to handle it! (You’re literally a non-human being which is an Emantor of the End.)

..Even with the nervousness causing you to shiver as you heard rapid footsteps approaching the room you were in. How the hell did they know you were awake?

…

There’s a camera in the corner of the room. You noticed from the red blinking light of it.

Three knocks sound out from the other side of the wooden door, before the metal handle turns rather slowly. You find yourself coming to the realization… you don’t have your sword, though your parasol is in the far left corner of the room. You instantaneously looking around in a frenzy, trying to figure out where the hell they placed your sword-

The sudden tossing of something hits your side and you nearly flinch, and instead look down.

..your sword. They had it.

“..Thank you.” Your voice is raspy and it makes you cringe in response, immediately clearing your throat before looking up at the person at the door.

The same stranger from before.

“Carmilla. Carmilla Carmine.” She speaks, finally introducing herself.

“Thank you, Mrs Carmine.” You repeat once again, bowing your head in respect. Grabbing your sword, you slowly get up. Finding your shoes neatly put next to the bed.

“I expect you out of here in at least 5 minutes.” She says firmly before she starts to close the door.

You don’t know what came over you..

“Wait-“ Hastily, you twisted your torso so you’re looking at her. And she stops in her tracks.

..you need to get away from where ever this is. But, perhaps exploring a bit and making some connections here wouldn’t be so bad.

“..I know there’s a way I can make this up to you. For your kindness, I mean. I don’t know where I am, but I can give you as much information as you need about me that I’m comfortable sharing. Please- I need to figure out where I’m going to go from here, I can be a useful asset.”

Who knew this could all happen from a simple journey to find a pharmacy.

Alright so.. i’ve decided I’ll split this up to be a a different part story kinda thing. So this of this as a prologue/Chapter 1

Thank you all for reading!!

Part 2

Taglist: None yet

[yellowocaballero]

re: utopia, one thing that i personally find funny is that a popular CN gacha game (damning words when it comes to taking me seriously, i know) just had an arc where the antagonist was a guy following Order that wanted to put everyone into a collective hallucination where everything would be perfect (obv without the opportunity to grow as a person Ever, but well, at least everyone is Satisfied), and him being a jesus figure that would suffer for everyone's sins and be aware of the dream/control it. (man i wonder if they had a naruto rerun while writing penacony)

i really liked it, but i did not anticipate that i'd get two cakes due to my favourite writer tackling similar themes (well they do be as old as time)!!!!1!!!1 and i think that you're really good at getting your point across — you once said that writing a fic is kinda like a dialogue with yourself to you, if i'm not mistaken —, and i always have to clear my glasses after reading your works because they get covered in dried little tear dots from my eyelashes, and what im saying is that im excited to do so again. it sounds stupid. thank you for sharing your work, im incredibly excited to see you unravel the narrative knot into heartstrings. yellowocaballero going to ascend to moirahood on national tv in 2035, keep your eyes peeled, everyone!

anyway sorry for blabbering so much i hope this didn't come across as comparing (though you'd be better obviously) i just crack up every time i think that you got around to writing naruto fic when that arc dropped. the timing is great. prophets of the new age receiving a beam of light telling us about personal growth and lifted jesus allegations. if i ever see you writing fic for honkai star rail or genshin or whatever it's going to be both too soon and the greatest thing i've ever read in that fandom. stay funny (not an obligation or a threat, you can be unfunny if you want, but i don't think the universe prepared for that opportunity. it'd flop into itself like a wet tissue)

Oh, literally I downloaded Star Rail because I was interested in some of the stuff I heard about it. Played it a little and never picked it back up again. I should, I'm just awful about phone games! Not ADHD enough. Maybe I can watch a playthrough...?

I love nice life parallelism. I do think the themes of "the bad guy wants everyone to be happy" is inherently kind of interesting, because it inherently raises a lot of questions - why is he a bad guy, if he wants to be good? What about his plan makes him a bad guy instead of a good guy? What delineates a bad and good guy, anyway? How did this guy get so turned around that he thought badness was good? If handled well, it's inherently a rich character. If badly, then it's just kind of nonsensical and goes against its own messaging.

The "well, the bad guy is right, but since he kills people about it that invalidates his own point" approach is always boring and conformist, but it can be surprisingly hard to shake. I don't think Obito, Madara, and the Ame 3 are 'bad guys who are right morally but with bad methods' - I think they're good people who are so deformed by their world that a hugely destructive evil scheme is the closest they know how to come to goodness. By that logic, Obito had to be written as...deformed. Very much so. But that was what made him so interesting to explore. How do you un-deform that? Is that even possible? When we put him on the good guy team, is he genuinely a good guy who overcame his warped nature, or is he just a warped person doing good guy things? FWIW, I think a big difference between the HSR character and Obito is that what Obito can't partake of this Eden because he thinks of himself as somebody who's far too late to save (also, isn't God/Jesus all about Free Will?)(Calvinists DNI).

I don't think this story gets too sad...it's just too nuts...but, of course, you have to feel sorry for Obito. He wants to change the system that ruined him, but as the evil created by that system he still can't fully see the very important thing that he's missing. We've seen him shy away from the thought already - if only a perfect world can create good people, how the hell do you explain Naruto? As the reader, we want him to be helped. We continue reading in the hope that he will be helped. Thanks for the ask, I really should find some way to consume HSR.

[smokerswifey]

OK this has been on my mind for a while

For the past month, some really toxic graylu shippers and anti gruvia/ juvia's have been getting really toxic on tumblr ( and twitter )

Especially @graylunation ( who is a grown ass woman, her age will be relevant later in this post )

Obviously the problem isn't the fact that these people love graylu and dislike gruvia and juvia .

Everyone is entitled to their opinion and graylu make a good looking couple so tbh I can't blame them .

And them not liking gruvia and juvia for various reasons is not anyone's business at all .

But THE problem is that they have been BOMBARDING juvia and gruvia positive posts with hateful and frankly disgusting comments which is such a pain in the ass because as I said before ppl are allowed to like what they want without being slandered and bullied .

And specifically@graylunation has been the one, bothering us the most, leaving every single gruvia/juvia post with hateful comments and it has been SUCH a PAIN .

The thing that pisses me off the most is that she's a huuuuuuge hypocrite ! She constantly whines on posts, telling ppl to stop criticising Graylu shippers, she tells people that her page is specifically about graylu and asks for no hate comments, when she literally hates on every gruvia/juvia post and goes on gruvia/juvia pages despite not liking it just to harass the person who created the page ! Hypocrital much ??

The worst thing is she keeps calling JUVIA a R@PIST ??? Does she even know what R@PE means ???

This is so unfunny how can you compare a lovestruck girl and her temporary unrequited crush to a r@pist and r@pe victim .

The furthest Juvia has done touching Gray is just giving him surprise hugs and she lets him go when he complains to much, how can someone in their right mind equate that to r@pe ??

And wherever there is a fanart or official art with bby boy Greige she keeps saying Juvia must've had to grape him to have his babies like wtf is wrong with you, his biggest fantasy is starting a fam with her, how delusional could you be .

I can't believe someone would bring up a topic as unfunny R@PE just because you're bitter a fictional pairing you liked didn't end up together like dude you're a grown ass woman, it's time question you're behaviour .

Honestly this woman sucks ASS and i feel rlly bad for other Graylu shippers being associated with such a wackjob .

This whole ordeal has been so annoying and I hope it stops .

[the-desolated-quill]

I just wanted to share this clip from the Borderlands movie because I’m fascinated by it.

I’ve heard people describe this film as the worst video game movie ever made, and I initially thought that was just hyperbole. No movie can possibly be that bad, right?

Now I’ve never played the games, so I have no idea how good an adaptation this is. All I can really comment on is the film itself. Specifically this clip. Let’s ignore the bit at the beginning with the Jack Black robot shitting bullets. We’ve all seen that in the trailer. It was painfully unfunny then and somehow less funny now. No, what I want to talk about is the action scene afterwards. That has got to be the single worst edited and choreographed action scene I think I’ve ever seen. You’ve got Kevin Hart and the mask dude holding a bad guy against the crate, and then Cate Blanchett kicks him in the face, which then cuts to the bad guy somehow teleporting away from the crate so that he can be launched through it. Then a bunch of other bad guys show up and the whole thing just descends into utter confusion. I have no idea of the layout of the room, where the bad guys are coming from, or where the actors are in relation to where the bad guys are. Characters seem to teleport to random places without rhyme or reason. Rabbit ear girl and the Jack Black robot straight up disappear in certain shots. None of it flows together at all.

Compare this to something like John Wick where every action scene is a straightforward progression from cause to effect. A leads to B leads to C, which causes D and creates E, which results in F and so on. With Borderlands, it’s more like A leads to C, which causes E, then back to B because we forgot to show that, and then skip to D, which results in WTF.

And that’s just one clip. If the whole movie is like this, no wonder it got a 0% on Rotten Tomatoes.