#this is genuinely offputting

[paranormeow7]

if lovemaking with you were a perfume, it would waft through the air like the gentle embrace of a sun-kissed meadow at dawn, where whispers of nostalgia linger in the breeze. imagine the warmth diffusing from a flickering campfire, casting a soft, golden glow on moments wrapped in bittersweetness. the fragrance would be an exquisite blend – the sweetness of elusive memories, the richness of dark chocolate, the lingering aroma of freshly brewed coffee, and the grounding notes of ancient woods. each inhale would transport us to a dreamlike realm, urging us to live in the enchanting magic of the present, free from the weight of worries.

yep, sex with you must be real good.

WHO ARE YOU

[ejsuperstar]

Imagine you live in pelican town. The new farmer has been here a couple weeks now and seems to be settling in, except... He's picking the weirdest friend choices. Like sure it's not weird to befriend the local fisherman, especially when he has an interest in fishing himself, but you're pretty sure you've seen him rooting through the Saloon's garbage with the local homeless man. As well, he keeps harassing the poor guy who works at Joja even though you KNOW he doesn't want to be friends with him.

And since you're on the topic of weirdness, isn't it odd he seemingly runs everywhere at a full sprint? Or just... Eats entire raw fish while fishing for "energy reasons"...

...

Despite all that, it's too early to call him off putting or anything... He has been engaging in town traditions, and he's started helping out with the old community centre. He's probably like the rest of you. Someone with a few quirks, that will fit in with the valley great!

Surely he can't get any weirder... Right?

[frankiebirds]

what an incredibly normal and not at all autistic thing to say! (lying)

[pcktknife]

so basically fave character priority in no particular order is cute girls. black/brown folk. and strange individuals (in actuality or simply perceived by others. appearance or otherwise)

[les-gnossiennes-fantomatiques]

Just saw the New York Public Library recording of the original Broadway cast of Phantom of the Opera, and it completely rescrambled my brain.

Michael Crawford.

BUT STEVE BARTON.

BUT BUT MICHAEL CRAWFORD.

BUT BUT BUT STEVE BARTON.

BUT BUT BUT BUT MIGHAEL CR—

(The TOFT archive is such an incredible, invaluable resource staffed by some of the most pleasant and helpful people. If there is one nice thing about Phantom closing (😭) it’s that this is available to watch with a smidge of planning. )

[kagoutiss]

pays for his therapy

[signed-sapphire]

@oh-shtars I thought of a way our Mags could get along— mutual love for their wives! No crowns, no capes, just a simple double date

I really like RFTS!Magnifico’s design— the hair and the poofy half-sleeves and nose shape and longer hair and everything! He’s trying not to smile lol

[zer0point5ive]

i love how pretty and hard to be around he is

[ardenssolis]

E.mmrich in D.AV is so cute. I never thought that I would find a necromancer endearing but his enthusiasm and passion over all things dead / worry over their well-being and spirits has touched my heart.

[coulson-is-an-avenger]

you've heard of recognizing a character is your own type, now get ready for someone telling you that a character is your type and them being so completely correct it almost makes you mad

[myrmica]

infinity mechanism/worst breakup in minecraft roleplay history.mp4

[maeamian]

lmao I still can't believe these fascist dickheads left their GOTV operation to fuckin' Charlie Kirk. Their plan this election includes having the world's least likable man teaching the world's least likable henchghouls how to be normal enough to talk to people and I, quite frankly, don't think either side of that equation has it in them to succeed.

[freckliedan]

besides dan and phil the only youtube channel i'm all in for is positivecouple. NOBODY is doing it like them.

[jankwritten]

i think one of my biggest gripes with TSATS is the sentence structure and the way that things are phrased.

Sentence structure: the book is CONSTANTLY using ", and", or "then", or "but" instead of splitting up a phrase into two separate sentences. Once I noticed it, I couldn't stop noticing it. In some places it works fine, but right out the gate, as the first line of chapter one, it 1) caught my attention in a negative way and 2) felt immediately clunky and awkward.

The way that the book demonstrates action also feels unnatural and doesn't flow as well as it could. Things are described as happening "now", such as when Kayla takes her lolipop out of her mouth and holds it at her side, the book narrates it as "now holding the lolipop at her side". We didn't SEE that action occur, we're just being described the RESULT of the action, does that make sense? As a reader, you want to SEE the action, you want to SEE her tug the lolipop out of her mouth, see her hand hang by her side as her expression pinches with anxiety over the discussion. We don't want to just be told that "now" her lolipop is out of her mouth, y'know?

There are also sentences that just feel flat out unedited, phrases that have too many words for what they want to accomplish, or with a structure that doesn't make sense - like on page 56, the sentence "They raced up the steps to the platform, Nico easily outrunning his boyfriend, though that was mostly due to Will having to get his land legs again."

First of all - why are they running up the platform? In the previous line, where we're told their cab driver got them to the station with 6 minutes to spare, the specific choice of saying "to spare" makes it sound like there is plenty of time to make it to their train. In the sentences after, we even learn that Nico and Will wound up waiting for their train anyway, so, the fact that they're running when Will feels sick reads...weird, to me. If I was car sick, and then somebody forced me to run for no reason, I would not be a happy camper.

Second of all - The addition of the final third of the sentence, after the second comma, should be it's own phrase. It should be given it's own space, like "(though that was mostly because Will didn't have his land legs back yet)." because it's not important information, just an offhanded comment Nico is making.

Third of all - "though that was mostly due to" and "having to get his" are clunky and wordy. It could've just been "Nico easily outrunning his boyfriend, who didn't have his land legs back yet." It's a smoother sentence that doesn't get bogged down by the extra words.

And that's just one instance. This book is LOADED with moments like this, where action will get lost in a sentence's wordiness. The book tries to be quick and snappy, in Riordan's style, but it fails because it can't quite nail down the phrasing.

There are also moments where the only thing the characters are interacting with is each other, only grinning, grimacing, sighing, glancing at one another, etc etc, instead of doing actions while they speak. Fidgeting with their hands, shifting from side to side, looking away at their surroundings, that kind of stuff is how you convey a MOOD. Body language is important when writing character conversations!! Is somebody relaxed, or are their shoulders tensed up, arms folded across their chest with their muscles flexed, leaning back on one leg with their body halfway tilted away, as if they were ready to flee at a moment's notice? These are the kind of details that I'm missing in TSATS, the kind of things that feel like they're missing.

I also have a lot of gripes with the dialogue itself.

People don't talk like they do in TSATS. The content of what they're saying is realistic enough, sure, yeah, but the specific way that a lot of the dialogue is phrased? It doesn't feel natural. Try reading some of the sentences out loud without editing any of the words. It doesn't sound the way a human being SPEAKS.

THAT'S what I mean when I say these characters are OOC. The way that they're speaking is uncomfortable and feels as if they're being used as a puppet, or a mouthpiece for what somebody ELSE wants them to say.

[neobisexual]

im sooo normal but im incapable of complimenting someone without (feeling like or actually) coming across as a sweatily horny freak but im normal tho

[beeapocalypse]