#this is OLD stuff. like... several months.
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Yandere! Mr. Scarletella:
Content: violence + stalking + voyerism + picture taking + masturbation + stealing + break of privacy + neutral reader + tampering with your food + noncon content + Stockholm syndrome. + mindbreak.
Summary: Human! Scarletella just wasn't able to stop himself from stalking falling in love with such an amazing person, God, he just loves stealing borrowing your stuff!
Note: So, I just had to write something about this amazing game, feel free to check it out and support the creator!!
SFW:
Yandere! Scarletella who fell in love since the first time he saw you around university, always being around those other guys... But he knew he just had to wait, yeah, wait for the right moment to approach you.
Yandere! Scarlatella who keeps randomly appearing on your classes from time to time. Oh, he isn't even in your course, but taking a few extra classes or even skipping some of his is no issue for him.
Yandere! Scarlatella who makes sure to get close enough so he can steal a few things from you while in class, sometimes it's your old pencil, other times he just takes whatever has touched your hand that class. That includes waiting until the university is closing to take your thrown away coffe cup (it still has your salive, so he has definitely kissed you, right?).
Yandere! Scarlatella who keeps on appearing on your daily life, you try to act as if the constant encounters are just mere coincidences, not like he even tried to strike up a conversation with you, so there must be no danger, right?
Yandere! Scarlatella who sometimes follows you back to your doorm. He always makes sure to walk quite far away from you trying to avoid freaking you out as he knows it would affect your daily routine.
Yandere! Scarlatella who climbs up the tree just to be able to catch a glimpse of your face while you're sleeping. You look so beautiful with your lips sligthly parted! ♡ You don't know it, but he has found a way of opening your window while you're sleeping. When he feels extra bold, he lets himself run his fingers through your soft lips feeling your warm breath is just enough to get him hot and bothered ♡.
Yandere! Scarlatella who begins to be feared by all your friends. They keep warning you about him, but it's not like you have any proof of what he's doing, such a shame :(( jk. He made sure to state his point, beating your poor friends to a pulp if he saw them getting a bit too close to you, he made sure to leave no visible marks, he doesn't want you worrying your pretty little head.
Yandere! Scarlatella who loses it after seeing that creepy long-haired guy far too close to you, if you wanted him to kidnap take you with him already you could've just said so dummy! Of course he wastes no time taking you from those filthy guys. You will be safe with him ♡.
Yandere! Scarlatella who breaks your poor mind after being trapped several months. Maybe being taken care of isn't so bad, right?
NSFW:
Yandere! Scarlatella who masturbates to your sleeping face, his tip being dangerously close to your lips. He can't stop imagining them surrounding his lenght...♡ He knows he has to keep patient but each day it becomes harder to act neutral.
Yandere! Scarlatella who takes photos of your clothed cunt for his collection. This collection includes many versions, from more tame ones (you smiling) to less... ethical ones (your sleeping face).
Yandere! Scarlatella who robs your underwear while you sleep. He just needs some... extra motivation. So he uses them, wrapping them around his cock as he keeps moving his hand up and down, making sure to stain your poor underwear with his sperm. He makes sure to clean them throughly before giving them back to you, although he sometimes wishes he could just cum inside the underwear you're currently using.
Yandere! Scarlatella who keeps on putting his own fluids on the stuff he feeds you. Most days he keeps it tame, deciding to introduce a bit of his salive on your food/drink, but when you behave extremely bad, he uses his cum, mixing it with your food together with some aphrodisiac, just enough to make you lose a bit of your sanity from not being able to masturbate.
Yandere! Scarlatella who keeps cameras all around his house so he can see you from different angles (all make you look like an angel ♡). He may or may not use those videos to masturbate, just maybe.
Yandere! Scarlatella who begins to use your mouth to release himself as a reward. You were just so eager to be touched! He just knew you were in love with him! It has definitely nothing to do with him being the only human contact for over six months! You let him use your mouth as he wants, forcing his cock into your throat, those sinful sounds filling his room as you try not to puke from his tip hitting the back of your throat.
Yandere! Scarlatella who slowly begins to mark your whole body as his. He started by marking your face with his cum, moving on to your mouth and then to your beautiful chest, the next step was of course cumming all over your low abdomen.
Yandere! Scarlatella who refuses to cum inside of you. He keeps controlling himself by saying that he wants to make sure both of you truly love each other... that's... well. Let's just say that he is just another level of delusion, but don't worry, he would never give up on his sweet and precious darling ♡ !
#fanfiction#x reader#smut#homicipher#mr scarletella#homicipher scarletella#homicipher smut#homicipher headcanons#yandere x reader#tw yandere#yandere male#yandere smut#yandere scenarios#mr scarletta#mr scarlatella x reader
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You Deserve Better - JJ Maybank X Reader
Requested.
A/N: Not my best work but It was a good writing exercise.
Your boyfriend, Todd, was anything but loving and caring. He had money, so you would get gifts, flowers sometimes, and expensive jewelry. but lately it seemed like you were just an accessory, something to make him look better. someone to bring to family events and parties, although he would pay you no mind once you had been introduced to people. He was also a heavy drinker, and there were rumors that he did drugs when he and his friends went boating together. It started as a decent relationship, he was cute and tall and funny. But lately he had been wrapped up in what you tenderly referred to as "Kook Bullshit."
You were fortunate, you lived comfortably. you certainly didn't come from millionaires. But because of this you were referred to as a Kook, even if you didn't consider yourself to be like the others. You began going to parties and meeting all kinds of new people, particularly a group of Pogues. almost instantly you took a liking to JJ Maybank. His golden blonde hair and sea blue eyes were enchanting, and despite your relationship it was an irresistible temptation. You kept it quiet, and secretive.
You were currently waiting on the edge of the beach with your phone. You opened your phone and were met with its bright screen contrasting the darkness of the night. The wind chill tousled your hair. you searched for his contact. Blondie. and sent him a quick text.
Busy rn?
Nah
pick me up?
otw
You smiled. It was a guilty pleasure, you enjoyed spending time with JJ, he was sweet and funny and he wasn't abusive, or rude. He paid attention to you and listened to you talk. You sent him your location and waited in the darkness for another few minutes, listening to the chatter and music from the beach party that was not far from where you stood. After a while the twinie came rolling up, JJ was driving and he rolled down the window. "uh, Uber for Y/N?" he joked. you laughed and got into the passenger seat. He must not have been far when you sent your location to him.
"So no grand plans tonight huh?" he asked as he drove further from the island towards a more secluded area. "Not interested in the party." you explained. It was lame, some kids had stolen a bunch of beer and were all drunk playing beer pong in the sand. "Where's the boyfriend on this lovely evening?" he asked you. you sighed and looked over at him. It was stupid, but the moonlight made his eyes twinkle... "He's staying in charleston with his friends." JJ nodded. He always asked about Todd. It was strange, but deep down he just cared about you, and wanted to make sure you were in a safe situation. Being a victim of physical violence himself, he hated to see it happen to others. "So he's out of town?" he asked quietly. "Yes." you replied.
JJ pulled up to an abandoned field, mostly dirt and sand. The weather was nice and it was a pretty delicate evening with the moon shining down and the area being quiet, all you could hear were the southern cicada's singing their songs and the subtle sound of waves lapping not far beyond the clearing. You hopped out of the van, and JJ followed suit and helped you on top of the van, where he had just laid out an old beach blanket. He laid on his back and you did the same. looking up you saw how clear and bright the stars were.
"Thanks for picking me up." you begin. "I've had a lot of stuff going on and I just needed to get away." you admit. JJ looks over at you understandingly. His hand brushes yours, barely touching but not holding hands. "It's alright. I get it," he retorts, running his fingers through his hair with his other hand. "I like to get away sometimes too." he says.
For some reason, the air is thick with tension. You'd been seeing each other and hooking up in the twinkie for 4 months now. It became a routine. After several moments spent in silence JJ spoke finally. "I've been thinkin." he says. His voice is straight to the point. "You should leave Todd." he states flatly. Slightly offended, you turn to look at him. "JJ you know why I can't." you say. "Who cares what he says?" he pleads. "He-" you swallow hard, a gulp. "He might hurt me." you admit, your eyes are glazed over, embarrassed almost. "Rafe told me he saw him doing coke with his buddies. They trashed some expensive yachts, and they were high off their asses playing with a gun they found."
JJ is silent for a minute. "You know I wouldn't let anything happen to you right?" he says finally. "I know but this whole thing just feels wrong. What if he finds out?" you continue. "He might try and go after you. I don't want that." you state clearly. "Well he can try, but he won't get to touch me." JJ says confidently. you went back and forth at the idea, you wanted out, but not where you could be hurt. you also felt safe with JJ, you knew that the islanders from the cut stuck together no matter what. You were like an honorary pogue. "fine."
You finally say, pulling out your phone and drafting a message to Todd, he always reads your messages almost instantly, but he barely ever replied. "How does this sound?" you said after typing away for a few minutes.
We're over. I don't want my stuff back. Don't talk to me anymore.
JJ looked over the message, and before you could freak and and be doubtful he hit send. there was a rush of relief followed by panic. "Oh my god." you uttered. "Oh my god!" you said louder. "JJ i'm officially single now." you said. "Yeah, so that means we can get inside the van right now without any guilt?" he smirked, leaning over to you, you had a pit in your stomach but you kissed him anyway.
#reader insert#my writing#x reader#jj obx imagine#jj maybank x reader#jj maybank#jj outer banks#jj x reader#jj maybank fluff#jj mayback x reader#jj mayback imagine#jj maybank x you
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Hello dear friend,
I’m Noha from Gaza, Mother of martyr and wife of martyr .
17 people of My family was forcibly displaced from their homes to the southern Gaza Strip, and they now live in samall tent , The occupation completely destroyed our house and our business and we no longer have anything that we used to own.
MY mother suffers from joint pain and back cartilage pain. Also, she had surgery before the war to remove a tumor in the intestine 💔!!️ and she needs to continue her treatment.
As for my middle brother, Darwish,He has a family of 10 people, he is paralyzed in his right leg, he suffers from severe leg pain. Two months before the war, he had surgery in Egypt to implant a joint in his leg, and he was supposed to return to Egypt to continue his treatment, but the war prevented him from doing so, so he urgently needs to go to Egypt to continue his treatment.
As for me, I lost my small and beautiful family in the 2014 war, which consists of my husband and my only child, whom I gave birth to after 7 years of deadly waiting and a very long and expensive treatment journey. He was only two and a half years old. I lost him and did not hug him enough to forget the agony of waiting for him to come. I also suffered injuries, which resulted in several operations on my right leg and other parts of my body, the effects of which I still suffer to this day. So, I don't want to experience what it's like to lose someone I love again. It's a very painful feeling. Please save my family.
Life here is unbearable, especially tent life is very difficult, and the situation is getting worse every day.
I urge you to support us to save our lives, Your support is our only hope for survival after losing everything.
We hope you will continue to support us by donating or sharing to help save and rebuild our lives. Every contribution matters, much appreciated
Many thanks to everyone who supported us.
https://gofund.me/e6644700
For those who see this please, visit their blog and reblog their blog’s posts so they get more attention and if you have the money to spare please donate.
Also I apologize, but I do not have the ability to donate to you. Trust me if I had the ability I would but I don't and I can't. I have no bank account or credit card to transfer money to and no job to gain any money. Every time I ask my parents to help they shut me down so this is the only way to help you. Please forgive me.
#free gaza#save palestine#gaza genocide#free palestine#justice for palestine#palestine genocide#palestinian genocide#gazaunderattack#palestine donation#gaza#support palestine#israel palestine conflict#palestine news#all eyes on palestine#gaza news#gaza under siege#gaza strip#palestine#from the river to the sea palestine will be free#fuck israel#please donate#donation#donate#donate if you can#donations#gaza gofundme#palestine gofundme#gofundme#go fund them
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Hey @sharkbait-33 look here they are
and the guy whose playthrough this is is on here and we're mutuals. If you see this man.... you've already seen it.
Behold, the saga of Omicron throwing things at people continues
#azure arted#this is OLD stuff. like... several months.#back when i did everything in red.....#astarion#shadowheart#omicron#he's getting a tag now
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i have been a ball of depression lately as well as my physical health worsening pretty severly this past week due to stress and so my friends have been. trying so hard to get me to get out and do things and its very sweet but i feel bad because the whole time i’m just a total mess
#they say they dont mind but i need to really. stop#im stuck.#and i know it’s hard on my friends to see me like this since i’ve been doing a lot better and now am back to my old habits#but i felt bad because they took me out shopping and to dinner tonight and i just had a headache and was limping and couldnt stop talking#about the recent death in my family and all the stress from classes and socially and how lost i feel#and i just wanted so bad to just. enjoy myself but i couldnt#but my friends know about how severe my depression is and are all very used to it#its in fact more normal than not. but i was really. feeling at my best for several months so the crash back down to not eating and sleeping#and being unable to fully tidy my room and all that stuff has been. difficult for me as well as those around me#it’s been normal for me for so long to live terribly that taking care of myself for a while and then losing the drive to has been. hard#im trying to get better but i slide back down#i need to work on my constant self loathing but i keep walking around just. conviced im such a burden and being sad makes it even worse#i just. am always overcompensating for my lack of#ability to love myself with just. constantly showering everyone around me with love and its. hard for me when i dont have the energy to do#even that anymore. its hard to let people take care of me when i just want to take care of them all the time
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calling it now. the new apes trilogy is gonna have an ape/human kiss like the og movie did.
#uhhhh AUBGAJSHDAHSAKB#maybe not on the lips like taylor and zira but#like a platonic cheek kiss at least. im calling it idc#pota#planet of the apes#kingdom of the planet of the apes#look. listen. we've already got references for other og apes stuff in the caesar trilogy#the names for nova and cornelius. the spaceship easter egg in Rise. the “no!” scene#uhhh caesar is doing a statue of liberty puzzle thingy in Rise#bright eyes!!!#i know theres gotta be more. my mind is blanking rn.#does. does that one track in Dawn with the xylophones count ASDGIAUSD#i forget what the track is called. but its the one where koba and his dudes go to check out what the humans are doing? the first time aroun#i think#theres some old timey sounding instruments and xylophones that soundl like it came from the og movie#i KNOW theres more refs im just tired and havent seen War in a while#my freaking blu ray player stopped working when i was watching Dawn a month or two ago LOLLL#Dawn is still stuck in there... </3#uhhh yeah anyways#rewatched War several times after i made this post and#for references in War to the ogs. we got those cross thingies#ekhras ya ameerah
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Years and years from now, I'll look back at this part of my life, specifically this summer, and just vividly remember how genuinely fun it's been to be a part of the QSMP fandom. Like, seriously, I don't think I've seen a community so fun and engaging to interact with- everyday, I'm just so amazed by the love and support everyone has for this server; the fanart, animations, clips, edits, etc. genuinely made my summer this year. And I hope there will be more moments to look back on and reminisce in the days, weeks, months, and years to come.
#qsmp#man i just know that when im all old and stuff ill just suddenly remember how much i adored a certain minecraft server#or maybe even one year or several months from now ill just pull up jaiden's vod from today and just re-experience all the warm and fuzzies#once again#like i will certainly come back to this day several weeks from now and just rewatch the streams over and over again
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Sometimes I still think about The Owl House Gang all trying to watch ATLA together but then Zuko's backstory in The Storm retraumatizes Hunter so bad they have to stop
#luz is too young to have grown up with the show she just heard it was good#SHE DIDN'T KNOW GUYS#they all get super into it and the gaang and maybe even make some jokes about how Zuko reminds them of Hunter#and then suddenly it is Not Funny Anymore#they just straight up stop watching it because it was So Bad#and then months later Hunter is like '....... i really want to know where that show goes'#so they pick it up again#everytime Zuko makes a bad life decision Hunter is just dying inside#'your dad DOES NOT LOVE YOU YOU CAN DO BETTER'#season 2 is such an emotional rollercoaster#like zuko is figuring stuff out and seems like he's gonna redeem himself and everyone is getting so hype#because at this point they NEED to see this character get a happy ending because they have been throufh WAY TOO MUCH over him#and then in the season finale he regresses#the BETRAYAL#they are like wailing and rending their clothes like dudes in the bible#hunter just sitting there with his head in his hands#season 3 storyline with zuko at the fire palace is also massively triggering for him but he's being so normal about it#the rest of the squad on the copium like 'he can still turn this around guys'#secretly several of them have given up on him at this point but they can't admit that there's too much riding on this#and then zuko DOES IT but the scene is so tense that no one even feels like they can celebrate because they're all projecting way too hard#and then zuko redirects the lightning and they're like 'FUCK YEAH!!!!!!!!!!'#there is much crying at the finale#luz and amity kin assigned eachother as aang and katara so they're really happy when they get together#hunter like 'mostly this is making me glad I didn't have to become the political leader of The Boiling Isles as a traumatized 16 year old'#'can you imagine'#these tags were not supposed to be this long lmao#toh#atla#avatar#my rambles
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Poor Form
✧ Nebarra x human!LDB, ft. Xelzaz & Khash ✧ Fluff, maybe angst (if you squint), slow-burn with tension; 2k+ word count ✧ Mentions of blood, (poorly written) fantasy violence ♫ "Ritual" - AWAY, Echos ��� @dalishthunder come take responsibility for this
It was the grey hour when you woke, the quiet lull between full night and the oncoming dawn. From where you lay in the tent, the only sounds you could hear were the steady breaths of your companions, the breeze rustling by outside, and the lone call of a bird, faint and dim in the distance.
Slowly, you sat up, grimacing at your sore neck and shoulders – though you had long since grown accustomed to sleeping on the ground, that didn't mean you, or your body, appreciated it. You'd have to look into getting some bed cots instead. Until then, though...
At least we stay warm through the night. The oiled leather tent kept out most of the wind, and the beasts you'd felled along the journey had long since become the bedding everyone slept on.
A sudden snore drew your attention to where Khash lay, bundled in her sleeping bag beside you, red eyes shut tight and jaw slightly parted, her sharp little teeth on display. Across from her was Xelzaz, sleeping quietly on his side with his back turned towards you; you could just make out the lump of his tail beneath the blankets. And next to him...
...was an empty bed roll, the fur still fluffed, apparently untouched through the night.
Frowning, you pushed back the blankets, habitually reaching for your sword as you rose – just in case, always just in case – and, taking care not to wake Khash, crawled quietly out of the tent.
The morning had teeth. You felt it the moment you stepped outside, the cold biting into your bare arms, gnawing through the fabric of your tunic and raising goosebumps across your skin. Your breath plumed white amidst the grey, and the dirt underfoot was cold and hard; not even the morning dew had loosened it. You found yourself wanting retreat back into the tent and burrow under your furs once more, pulling them all the way over your head and falling asleep beneath their warmth. Any other morning, you might have done just that. But...
The empty, untouched bedroll.
You squinted into the mist, eyes searching, searching... there. A figure, seated on a rock several metres away, smudged and blurred in the gloom, but glinting a familiar gold.
As you lowered your sword, a sigh slipped from your lips, drawn from some strange mix of frustration, concern, and relief.
"...How long have you been out here, Nebarra?"
"Morning to you too, guar-face," the elf drawled, and though he didn't rise, his helmeted head turned towards you. A thin layer of condensation covered the metal, droplets falling at his movement; his bangs, escaping through the visor, were damp and plastered to his helm. "And all night, to answer your question. Somebody has to keep watch."
"Obviously. But you volunteered for the first shift last night." Frowning, you looked him up and down, not bothering to mask your concerned displeasure. "Why didn't you wake me or Xelzaz? We could have relieved you. We were supposed to relieve you."
"Oh yes, a human and a lizard! I'm certain I'd feel very safe with you two on watch. Your species' eyesight is so much better than an Altmer's, after all."
Your frown deepened, brow furrowing as you stared him down. It was too early in the morning for his snark.
Wordlessly, you brought up your sword and levelled it at his throat. "I can see that gap in your armor just fine. I could kill you right now – and the same goes for whatever may have come up on us in the night."
Nebarra gave a disdainful snort, gloved hand clamping down on your blade and giving a sharp tug. Unprepared, reflexes still sluggish from sleep, you stumbled a whole two steps forward before managing to check yourself.
"Poor form," the elf sneered. "You won't be killing anything like that."
Your nostrils flared, a dozen retorts surging to your lips, but you held them all in.
He's right, and you both know it.
"I wasn't ready", "I'm still waking up", "I wasn't serious" – excuses that could get you, and maybe the others, killed. How long had Nebarra seen this in you? Why was he only mentioning it now? Why hadn't you realised it on your own, that despite your confidence, your skills, your strength – you were still very much mortal? And when had that confidence become something more dangerous – arrogance?
"...What?" Nebarra asked suddenly, drawing you from your reverie. "You have that expression again. The one where you're about to do something stupid."
"Spar with me."
"Terrible idea, absolu... wait. What?"
"Spar with me," you repeated, staring into the black of his visor. "I'm getting rusty, fighting nothing but bandits and mindless undead. This just proved it."
Nebarra was silent for a beat, his head tilting to the side. Something about the motion reminded you of a bird; the eagle-shaped helm only added to the effect. You waited patiently for his answer, wondering what exactly he had to consider –
Metal, arcing toward your sword arm.
You barely managed a dodge and a weak parry with the flat of your blade – you'd been holding it low, unready. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Clearly, Nebarra was done thinking – the two of you were sparring now.
Fair enough. Enemies wouldn't be so polite as to give you time to gear up, either. And now, for once, the odds weren't in your favour: a fully-armoured Altmer veteran with decades of experience, versus you, young, disoriented, and unarmored, only a single blade in hand.
It was thrilling.
You sidestepped another swing of Nebarra's blade – only to connect with it a moment later, coming out of the feint you had failed to read.
Sharp, stinging pain. Scarlet, dripping from your arm.
He was trying to hurt you. And you were giving him ample opportunity.
You needed to ground yourself, regain your rhythm – something you couldn't do without an opening, and Nebarra wasn't giving you any.
A glint of metal on the left – block, step back. Movement overhead, an oncoming blow – raise your sword, throw your weight behind it, disrupt his momentum.
At least, you tried. Fully armoured as he was, Nebarra had an extra thousand angaids of weight behind his swing, if not more. The sheer force of his blow knock your sword out of your hands, sending you staggering back. But the grass underfoot was slick with the morning's dew, and you were moving too fast, too unsteadily. Before you knew it, your back was colliding with the ground, and all you could see was grey sky overhead – and a golden sword coming down.
Careless.
But there was still a chance.
Contorting violently, you grabbed Nebarra's arm as the blade sailed by, nicking your face as it passed. You didn't let go of his arm just yet, though. Instead, you pulled, leveraging your weight against his, abdomen taut as you used him to haul yourself upright. Nebarra, clearly not expecting such a move, found himself betrayed by his own momentum, drawing him forward and down, aided by your weight. Gravity took care of the rest, and he crashed towards the earth, twisting even as he fell to avoid face-planting into the ground.
As he struggled to right himself, you rushed to retrieve your sword; Nebarra was already rising by the time you turned back to him.
"No you don't," you growled, charging the mer, sword raised.
His hand shot out, a ward rippling to life, though it buckled slightly under your sword's impact. Nebarra staggered, his half-risen stance precarious, unbalanced.
Now. Now. Now.
Once, twice, thrice more your sword glanced off the ward – and on the fourth blow, it shattered, leaving the Altmer open to your assault.
Metal clanged as you brought your sword down, colliding with his gauntlet as he struggled to block with it, not given enough time to raise his own sword in defense. You let the blade slide off, intending to follow up with its momentum, but Nebarra didn't give you a chance. The moment the sword glanced off his gauntlet, he lunged, catching you in the abdomen and bringing the both of you to the ground.
The tussle that followed was a blur.
His sword arcing down, yours blocking. Hilts catching, blades flying, yanked out of your grasp and his.
Panted breaths, heaving chests, grappling and rolling across the grass.
A glint caught your eye – your sword and Nebarra's, just within reach.
He saw it too, the both of you reaching out in unison for your weapons, desperate to be faster than the other.
Leather-bound metal brushed against your palm – the hilt. Your hand closed around it, drawing it in close. Brought it swiftly upwards, blade against Nebarra's neck.
At its touch, he froze – and so did you. Because resting against your own neck, biting into the tender flesh, was the edge of Nebarra's blade.
Stalemate.
Ears ringing, heart racing, you shift your gaze from the sword to the one holding it.
Hunched over and straddling you, a leg to either side of your waist, there was hardly any distance between your bodies. The beak of his helm was close enough to brush your nose; your breath fogged on the metal. His gasping breaths may has well have been your own – you could feel them, swift and hot, slipping through the gold feathers that covered his face, carrying the faint scent of wine.
Of course, he'd been drinking. It had probably kept him warm through the night – and he'd still managed to keep you off-balanced for most of the fight.
You were in worse shape than you'd thought.
That, or... maybe Nebarra was better than he'd ever let on.
"...Tonight," you breathed, staring up at him. "Let's... spar again tonight."
Nebarra grunted; you could hear the sound echo faintly in his helmet. "Fine. Don't expect me to go easy on you."
A smile tugged at your mouth – you could feel your lips crack and stretch at the motion, dried out in the cold; you gave them a brief lick before answering. "What, and this was?"
Another affirmative grunt. "I'll be sober by tonight. Unfortunately."
You snorted, then fell silent once more. With your eyes, you found yourself tracing the curves of his helm, pausing at the sight of his bangs peeking through, dark and tangled threads of gold. Something about them was like an itch you couldn't scratch, and you had the sudden urge to brush them aside, or at least tuck them back into his helm.
As your gaze drifted upward, toward the visor, a glint in its shadows caught your eye. Again, you paused, staring intently into the dark.
A reflective sheen, a gleam of crimson –
"Are you done breathing on one another, yet?"
Xelzaz's voice shattered your focus, and both you and Nebarra snapped your heads toward the sound.
The Argonian stood just outside the tent, arms crossed, head bare of its usual hood, scales shimmering in the pale light. Beside him was Khash, a shadowy smudge in the mist; her wide red eyes seemed to float amidst the grey.
"Good morning," you said stupidly, even as Nebarra scrambled to get off you.
"Why were you fighting?" Khash asked. "Did something happen?"
"For your – obviously necessary – information," Nebarra sniffed, dusting off his armour, "we were sparring. And you had better get used to it. Our dear Dragonborn and I will continue to do so, apparently, starting today."
As you sat up, you distinctly heard Xelzaz mutter, "By the Hist." When he turned his head to you once more, there was something incredibly deadpan about his gaze, an unspoken, "Really?" in his eyes.
"What?" you mouthed back, blinking at him in confusion. He only shook his head, and have no answer.
"Right... Well, let's get the fire going again, and I'll see about getting us all breakfast."
At that, Khash's gaze snapped towards him. "Ohh, Xelzaz, can I have some Hackle-lo with it?"
"Khash, you've eaten almost my whole stock."
"Oh..."
"...I'll see if I can't spare a few more."
"Yay! Heh."
"Horker stew for you, Nebarra?"
"I'm too tired to say no... but I'll watch you every moment of its making."
"Yes, yes, as usual. And what of you, friend?" Xelzaz turned towards you, and for a moment, you couldn't answer him – you'd been too distracted watching the scene unfold, a smile on your face.
"Ah... it doesn't matter to me, I suppose. Surprise me."
And so, thirty minutes later, as the sun climbed through the sky and burned away the mist, breakfast was served.
But for some strange reason, all throughout the meal, you found your gaze drawn... repeatedly...
...to Nebarra.
#nebarra#nebarra skyrim#skyrim nebarra#skyrim#i havent written action in YEARS i hope its passable#i tried to remember what my two whole gumdo lessons were like back in high school :DDD#also fyi i know ZILCH abt tes lore n stuff so uhhh pls be gentle w me on that front#i literally spent ten minutes looking up tamrielic weight measurements and then trying to convert that it to pounds and back#and apparently its only referenced in a book that appears in like four of the games so its clearly an OLD book#likely that tamriel doesnt even use that unit of measurement anymore but damnit i wanted to get SOMETHING accurate#anyway that was quite enough research for me tyvm#like mate i just wanna romance this sardonic sunflower#speaking of which i wanna give him flowers?? dont ask me why i just do#give him a boquet of yellow mountain flowers like#'i saw them and thought they looked like u'#to which he scoffs and VERY GRUDGINGLY accepts ONE#prolly tells us to give the rest to khash or xelzaz#fast forward several to months later and somehow we find that one flower v carefully pressed n preserved amongst his belongings#dont touch me i just made myself sOFT thinking about this#im literally gonna have to write it now dammit#dali this is all ur fault u have unleashed the floodgates of my garbage bin brain#........thank u :D#anyway yeah this was originally written for my ldb oc which is why the personality of the ldb here may be a bit.... specific? idk#just swapped pronouns to make it more self-insert/other people's oc friendly#anyway thank god its finally done; only took me three days#not super happy with the ending but oh well#'swhat happens when u dont write for over a year#rUST#rusty as lbd's fighting in this fic#whisper writes
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chat spirit halloween season is finally over i will now binge watch horror movies and then (eventually) draw who cheered 😇
#maybe i will draw the old oc i repurposed into a bully oc like a month ago#or i will draw horror movie shit#EITHER WAY IM DRAWING LESBIANS LETS GO LESBIANS 🦅🔥🙏🫡🏳️🌈💯💪#i wanna draw tatney bc they r severely lacking and i need to feed my favorite lesbian hi kale 👋#cam says stuff
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I just spent like 20 minutes thinking about soup
#i need to move out!!!!#i love my parents to be clear they're great#i just want to be in charge of my own meals again#it's not that they're bad at feeding me stuff i want to eat it's just we like different things#when it's just me i can make my soup however i want and no one's gonna say anything#Because It's My Soup#i can eat japanese chicken curry for a week straight! no one cares!#i just need to get better at eating vegetables#i want my own kitchen soooo baaad.....#my mom's sensitive to garlic. do you know how much recipes fuck if you add garlic? severely. and i can't if she's gonna eat it#i need my own kitchen so bad so so bad pleeaase#really hoping that i get my degree within like two months#and then i have to. urgh. find a job. but then i find a job and i go there#and i get Paid! money!#and once i have some money in the bank and a long term job i can try and get a flat#and once i have a flat i have my own kitchen i can order stuff online if i want and i can adopt a cat#i can have friends over i can decorate#and if i can swing it i'll be a civil servant#and if i'm lucky enough i can perhaps. give up the next 30 years of my life to a bank so i can own my own flat#god i hope. i fucking hope. i really really want to own#like not for landlord bullshit. just so i don't have to worry about where to go in a year two years five years#i want a civil servant job because that's for life and i would love to do the same thing forever#and i want to own a flat because i could make the space fit my needs and wants perfectly#and i wouldn't have to worry about where to live or old age or whatever#good luck to me finding a well situated 2 bedroom flat in one of the if not the worst city of france in terms of housing :)#but hey i've been lucky in life. maybe it'll keep going#i know what i want early! that's good#i shouldn't have a realisation that i want kids at 30yo or whatever. I Shall Not Become My Mom#ANYWAY i need my own kitchen!!!!!#wow i have a ramble tag now
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.
#thinking about how nice it would be to have an actual bed#instead of just sleeping on a mattress on the floor as i have done for the past 13 years#and how nice it would be to have an oven that actually works#(i tried to roast carrots tonight. the recipe said 40 mins at 190 C.#i had to set the oven to 250 C for it to actually reach 190 C. and roast for about 2 hours. and they still didn't get cooked properly)#and all the other things that need to be fixed about my home#(i love my flat so much but the furnishings and appliances desperately need updating)#but every time i start tentatively thinking about making one of these big changes#i get so overwhelmed by the logistics (who takes away the old mattress and oven? how do i dispose of them? how do i choose good ones?)#and then i remember that i am still over 10k in debt with student loans#and that literally a week ago i was calculating whether i'd be able to borrow money from friends for rent if necessary#and survive on lentils and rice and the other stuff in my cupboard for a month if i had nothing left for groceries#and i realize how UTTERLY ridiculous it is for me to even THINK about spending large amounts of money on anything until the debt's paid off#like every single financial advisor tells you that straight up#if you've got loans of multiple thousands of dollars and the interest rate is NINE FUCKING PERCENT#you do not put money away in savings. you do not invest money. you do not splurge on ANYTHING#you scrimp and save. and so that's what i've been doing. for a couple decades now#i'm so tired#and i've been doing this so long that i suspect it's permanently changed my brain chemistry#the mere prospect of taking any financial risks makes me instantly go into shutdown mode#need to get rid of that damn debt. asap. my severance payment is the light at the end of the tunnel for me rn#just gotta hold on till then. and then we'll see#tag rant#poverty#personal#cosmo gyres
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the wind and sea do follow thee /
and all the ledges calling thee...
#em draws stuff#treasure island#squire trelawney#doctor livesey#selkie au#it's been long and long but I've had these two on the brain lately#and because my current fic is un-illustratable for several reasons I decided to pop back over to an old favorite#'peter kagan and the wind' has been my song for calming down lately and it's a very similar vibe to what I want out of the selkie au#it has actually been eight months since I've drawn trelawney and I've decided to change up his design after years and years#liking the new shapes (which I can actually draw well I think)#specifically right where his neck and shoulder meet - it's closer to how he's built in my head than I've ever captured before#and I've been liking the more defined pockmarks that I do on alan so I've decided to bring those over#I'd always intended for some similar stuff texture-wise on trelawney but I wasn't being very confident in it so it was difficult to see#but in the end this is just me splashing all manner of things that I like for these two into one drawing#good saturated purples and my best attempt at those mignola-esque gravestones and a try at capturing how tom harpernovakaine writes them...#this whole thing went through many moments of looking unsalvageable but in the end it is probably one of my best drawings of them#I have a very early livesey drawing stuck to the back of the ol' ipad so it's really cool to hold that up and compare how far I've come#it's been an interesting three years and I think I'm a much more confident artist now!
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finally tackled the absolute mountain of laundry in various states of cleanliness around my room. now all of it is sorted and put into its respective zones of "away".
#98% of my room being clean with visible floorspace is just finally handling the laundry#i am ashamed and embarrassed that i always have so much dirty laundry#eventually i'll get back to the point i was at when i was the coach of laundry where i'll have like a week's worth of shit to get done#and not a backlog of several months#eventually#and i will be working on not feeling so much shame about the state of my laundry#i don't *like* that i do it but there's nothing inherently immoral about it like the voice of my mother that shouts in my brain thinks#the put away laundry plus the effort i've been making to Make My Bed before sitting in it has helped me feel more settled in the space#so that's good#when i am not as concerned about blocking the various registers in my room i will be in business#(mattress on the floor only fits in one specific corner right by the intake)#(output register is awkwardly directly in the middle of the opposite side of the room which makes arranging the furniture where i'd like it#an interesting endeavor that i'm not super excited in attempting to orchestrate in the future)#i know where i'd *like* things to go#whether or not that'll actually be feasible is another story#also i think i'm going to have to just go through my clothes with the mindset of actually getting rid of things#i threw out a couple pairs of socks because they were worn so thin i'm not sure mending would have fixed the holes#like that that point i'm making a whole new sock and you know what i could do instead? not do that#i also have a lot of Baggage Items i haven't quite gotten around to divesting myself of#(as in the items of clothing have a lot of emotional baggage tied to them that i may or may not be using to negative effect on myself)#lots of old shit lots of things that don't fit lots of things i don't even like actually#but it was free or nearly so and i've just held onto it because free#only a few things are kept because i like wearing them and the texture is nice#so we'll just. go through some stuff and eventually i'll get to the point that even if *all* of my clothes are dirty and on the floor#it doesn't take up my WHOLE goddamn room#that said this has in fact been a problem my whole life and so i don't imagine it's going to be quick or easy to fix lol
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It's a little funny. I spend so much time compartmentalizing that I convince myself I'm totally fine, of course, all the time.
But when I was filling out the questionnaire before my therapy appointment yesterday, it was like
.... OK yea maybe I have some problems
Also this one 😂😂😂
#speculation nation#it's ok i am now in therapy and we have weekly appointments set up#i havent always had the best experiences with therapy. and by that i mean it has never really been helpful to me#mostly tho bc it's been depression therapists. and i dont actually have depression.#what i DO have is trauma! and barely managed adhd and fibromyalgia.#and especially grief trauma in the past 5 years. oh God do i have grief trauma.#but i searched Specifically for a grief therapist with this. so she should be equipped to properly help me.#ive managed to reach an okay place regarding my old traumas. but this stuff. man it's hard.#i pushed myself to a near panic attack the other day upon realizing the painting i have is an authentic lithograph#& the realization that i am carrying the mantle of several generations of my family now.#most of the generations above me are now dead. so it's up to us to carry on their memories#and i am The One who is unapologetically incredibly tacky. up to me to carry that legacy.#it's pressure. weight that i didnt want. but i dont want to ignore it bc i dont want them to be forgotten.#so im hoping that with therapy. she can help me sort things out so it's less... difficult.#help me remember them without being paralyzed with panic and dread.#and maybe help me with my death paranoia...? 😅 i dont like feeling like anyone in my life could die at any time.#inevitable after my uncle died with only a month's warning and my dad died with barely more than a day's warning.#idk. for someone whose will to live comes from the people i love. it's rather paralyzing.#just gotta cling to the people i have left. and hold them dear.#negative/#kinda but not really. tagging just in case considering the subject matter.#idk im just trying to sort things out. no one goes through this many sudden deaths without a severe complex over it.#but. im in therapy now. and im trying. i am.
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when your bestie for life but also former co-worker tells you the former work tea and you just
#* &. ooc.#for context i used to work at a DV shelter#STRICTLY for DV women#there was a time they decided to let any woman in basically#like SEVERE MH but WITHOUT DV#stuff that we were not AT ALL equipped to deal with or handle#nor was it safe to us as staff or the clients in shelter#nor was it fair to the women who ACTUALLY needed our services but couldn't access because management decided#to let these aggressive borderline abusers themselves stay in shelter for 3+ months#anyway we had a do not access book where aggressive clients go after departing so future staff know not to let them back in as safety risk#low and behold my bestie just told me they let ONE OF THE WORST ONES in that book back in#i dont even work there anymore and im stressed FOR my bestie and another one of my former co-workers who is a sweet 73 year old lady#but that woman literally had like 5 pages dedicated to everything she did while in shelter#it just shows me that they STILL dont give a damn about staff safety especially nights#they still have people working nights alone#dealing with someone like that who was a CONSTANT TERROR to night staff specifically#omg i can't even right now guys i swear
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