#this has been sitting in my drafts since october

[soulless-angel25]

@mint-to-be-13 @shadow404notfound

Forced everyone in the group chat to change their display name to the first result they got from this Monster Factory name generator.

…it was an excellent choice.

[ironmaidenhead]

BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER Created by Joss Whedon (1997-2003)

[goodoneguys]

shows that I think the gays and theys will like that aren’t homosexual but also are homosexual

Dr. Stone

Barry

Quantum Leap (1989-93)

Monk

Chowder

Regular Show

Arrested Development

Star Trek The Next Generation

[waywardangel-wilds]

Hiiii!!! Would love to read more of your daddy!peeta takes they’re just so REAL specifically peeta juggling all the baby bags/gear/etc. whenever they leave the house

Hi! Dad Peeta is just me as a mom translated into Hunger Games lore so it’s just a (dramatic) person who has no idea what they’re doing trying their best.

Here’s some ideas:

- Daughter announced she’s going to the movies with friends (a boy from school is in that friends category) later in the evening -

“She’ll be fine,” Katniss dismisses while keeping her eyes on the dishes they’re stacking.

“But,” Peeta interjects. “What if, to make sure, as, you know, a cautious and loving father, I went along?”

“No.”

“Okay, okay, how about this: I go along and don’t tell her at all,” Katniss makes a face at him but he ignores it. “I wear a hat—“

“You’re too loud and obvious for a disguise.” Katniss closes the cabinet and goes off to the other side of the kitchen to put away the forks. “Why do you care so much anyways? She’s eleven for crying out loud.”

“Katniss! I know what eleven year old boys are like, I was eleven!” He hisses dramatically. “Do you have any idea how gross I was at eleven?”

Katniss raises an eyebrow, “care to share?”

“I—“ he cuts himself off, seeming to think better of it. “No.”

“She’s been friends with boys before,” Katniss rationalizes. “Girls and boys can be friends, you know.”

“Obviously I know that.” He whines. “But, please?”

“Why are you asking me?” Katniss laughs. “You’re an adult. When our daughter decides I’m her favorite and you’re 'he who shall not be named'? That kind of works in my favour.”

[everything-y-nothing]

MOODBOARD. blushing all the way home (Singer-songwriter x Rugby Star AU) by @newtonsheffield

[thelostrainbowthenovel]

Bios: The Feorian Rulers

- Ruling King Vulcan Von Brandt

. Age: 47

. Gender: male

. Sexuality: straight

. Family: parents, 1 older sister, 1 niece, Ignatius(oldest child), Hestia(second oldest child), Flint(middle child), Ashton(youngest child)

. Relationships: Soleil(wife)

. Abilities: fire magic(natural), hand-to-hand combat

. Physical Appearance: tall with a muscular build, short and slightly curly brown hair pushed back with spiky bangs, tan skin, dark brown eyes, several battle scars all over

Ruling king of the Kingdom of Feor, husband to Soleil, and father to Ignatius, Hestia, Flint, and Ashton. Although he is the second-born, his older sister never cared to take over the throne for herself so the role as heir was given to him during his early adolescence. He was always taught the ways of being a strong and capable leader as a prince, so while his new position as heir took some time getting used to, he accepted it gratefully as he always wanted to do best by his people. Logical when it comes to thinking, and preferring to rule with a firm approach, he comes off to some as close-minded and cold in his rule. While this is true to some extent, he is a lot more open-minded and caring towards his people than some would think, as he will advocate for new laws if he sees it as important or necessary. When he became of age he followed in the footsteps of the kings before him and joined the army, rising up in the ranks and serving as a captain during a series of battles that almost escalated into war when he was in his twenties. Fighting closely alongside him during this time was his wife Soleil and his best friend Idris Brenton, with the latter now being a general and his right-hand man when it comes to current military tactics and decisions. Although he was originally arranged to Soleil, they knew each other as children and made sure to get to know each other better during the course of their engagement, to the point they were genuinely in love when they married as adults. He may come off as stern and intimidating, but he softens up the most around his family, caring for their well-being and safety above all-else as he does not want to lose any of them for any reason.

- Queen Consort Soleil Von Brandt

. Age: 45

. Gender: female

. Sexuality: straight

. Family: parents, 2 older brothers, 2 younger brothers, 5 nephews, 1 niece, Ignatius(oldest child), Hestia(second oldest child), Flint(middle child), Ashton(youngest child)

. Relationships: Vulcan(husband)

. Abilities: flame magic(natural, depleted/no longer), hand-to-hand combat, sword-fighting

. Physical Appearance: tall with a fit, hourglass build, wavy and waist-length, side-swept fiery red hair fading into orange and yellow, fair skin, gold eyes, ears double pierced, large burn scar going from her lower-left cheek down all the way to her wrist

Queen consort of the Kingdom of Feor, wife to Vulcan, and mother to Ignatius, Hestia, Flint, and Ashton. Soleil grew up as the only daughter of one of Feor's most notable noble families, having four brothers. She did not despise being the only girl of her siblings however, as she got along fairly well with all of her brothers growing up. She knew Vulcan when they were children, back when he was just the prince and they were not arranged yet to be married. She followed in her families footsteps and joined the army when she was of age, fighting alongside her two older brothers and Vulcan. When they were both over the age of sixteen she and Vulcan were arranged to be married, doing so several months after she turned eighteen. She continued her work as a soldier for many years, even after having her first two children, before one fateful battle happened that not only gave her her burn scar, but also completely depleted her of all of her once powerful and strong magic. With no magic left, she took to wielding daggers and swords to defend herself with, being her daughter's first teacher on how to properly wield and fight with her own swords when she was big enough to learn. She also developed both PTSD and mild depression from her accident, that while she has been doing much better with her mental health in recent years, she still has her struggles with unwanted flashbacks and nightmares of the incident that have her feeling down for a long time whenever they pop up. She is a mature and wise queen, at first having a little trouble expressing herself and her emotions when she was younger, but has grown to become a lot more lively since then, even a little flirty to get her husband's attention now-and-then. While she is married into the royal family, she still has a good amount of influence. Nowadays she works on maintaining a strong presence as a role model for those in similar positions as herself when she was younger, that despite having a horrible accident that takes away a vital part of yourself, that there's other options in life out there to continue standing strong despite what others may say about you.

[chdmeeksmartins]

Peyton Anna Hyde, in the au no one asked for…

With her father’s loyalty, skepticism, and love of Zeppelin and her mother’s intelligence, quick wit, and compassion… Peyton is one confident kid.

The child who was always asking why and how she learned from a young age that questioning the status quo was a good thing. It sparked her early interest in activism, and has kept her on that path ever since. With a smidge of zen sprinkled into her headstrong determination to always fight for what matters to her. Whether it’s unfair bed-times, or against dress codes being enforced at school.

A lover of ripped jeans, rock music, good poetry, Neve Campbell movies, and root beer floats.

And while she’s a sharp witted quick thinker, she’s also taken a bit after her middle-sort of namesake by having a bleeding heart. Kitty might not literally be her grandma, but she sees her as one anyways.

Peyton has a tendency to be constantly annoyed by her little brother’s lack of concern about the world, and is trying her hardest to him passionate about something. Whether it’s climate change, or feminism, or even something small like sports.

She hates apathy, almost as much as she hates skinny jeans and the state of the music industry.

[apocalyptic-byler]

i realized i had a crush in october. ok so that means that i deserve to be given a sweater (preferably polyester) on the 3rd of december

[pizzaqueen]

I’m actually totally in love with the decor in what we see of the Harrington house

[theclowncowboy]

u guys should come to my frat party tonight. yeah its at kappa fagdyke

[the-fandump]

At first, Steve was just confused.

There was already enough to deal with after the rift opened up in Hawkins. There were far too many reports of strange things happening all over town, likely due to Vecna and his monsters wreaking havoc, and there was nothing anyone could do to stop it. He was just lucky to avoid most of the trouble.

Then the gifts started appearing.

It started small, of course. A few dead mice and picked flowers would be left outside his door, or maybe a pretty feather or two. It was like some sort of cat had taken a liking to him.

He didn't want to be rude (whatever it was might take offense to that), so he tried to take at least a portion of every gift and leave something in return, like a small water dish or a shiny rock he'd found. Whatever was leaving the gifts seemed to like them well enough.

When the flowers (which he always took) became more common and the mice (which he usually left alone) were replaced by buttons and trinkets, he realized something. Whatever it was that was stalking him and leaving those gifts was smart enough to learn what he liked. It realized that he preferred pretty or useful things over dead animals (prey?) and changed accordingly.

That was concerning. He tried to ignore it.

Something else that confused Steve was how often he would wake up to the sounds of shifting branches outside his window, even when there was no wind. He would sometimes glimpse a large shadow if he was quick enough to look. It was too high for anything that large to climb, but he got the disconcerting feeling that it wasn't a bird up there watching him.

It was not very comforting to learn that the lock on his window was broken.

Now, Steve was not the lightest sleeper, but there were some things that could definitely wake him up.

Like when he felt something crawling into his bed.

The creeping feeling of being stared at certainly didn't help. Steve tried to keep his breathing steady, not wanting to find out what would happen should the intruder realize he was awake. If he gave himself time to adjust he would have a higher chance of making it out of this alive, so he tried not to gasp when he felt cold talons grab his body.

There was a slight jerk, and suddenly Steve was being lifted into the air, held tightly Shaina the body of whatever creature was carrying him. The cool air of the night made him shiver, but his kidnapper didn't falter.

Steve thought he heard a few words whispered into the air during his unexpected flight, things like safety and hide and mine.

That last one scared him a bit.

When he was gently placed on something soft, Steve finally got the courage to crack open his eyes.

Inches away from his face was his kidnapper, head tilted to the side as it he looked at Steve with the strangest expression.

Steve felt like he was going to faint. He recognized that face, but there was no way it could be true. It couldn't be–

"Eddie?"

Steddie idea where Eddie does come back to life as a kas-ified upside-down vamp that doesn't remember his friends and is loyal to Vecna at the moment. He's given orders to go wreak havoc in the right-side up and he goes to do so.

Nothing too sinister at first. Just stalking people at night and setting them on edge enough to call the cops and when they get there he's already gone. Animal carcasses everywhere. Just random shit.

He gets orders to target a specific group. He doesn't understand why he feels reluctant to do so but he won't let his master down. From a distance he spies one of the group his master described and goes to torment this soul but when he gets closer GOD DAMN.

This creature is GORGEOUS.

Why would his master want him to torment such a beautiful thing?

It's Steve.

Vampire Eddie falls in love with Steve at first sight and legit can't complete his mission because he's too busy trying to woo his mate and Vecna gets increasingly more frustrated at his resurrected soldier.

Vamp Eddie leaving gifts for Steve to find in the mornings, Vamp Eddie watching over him as he sleeps to make sure nothing hurts his Love, Vamp Eddie just being so freaking whipped. When he hears that Vecna plans to send others towards Steve he kidnaps Steve so he can protect him and when Steve wakes up he's just like, "EDDIE!?"

And Vamp Eddie is all heart-eyed like: "He knows my name I knew we were meant to be."

[tottymatsuno]

wait he what he does what he wants what from who? i can be a young wome n...i cam stop being boy ....i can give him flesh?

[litlunacy]

Black Widow (Rainbow Masquerade)

The first part in an unfinished series of masquerade portraits. Ink and marker, done in 2020.

[cahootings]

remember when I said back from the edge is ed's song. you don't and that's fine but i'm finally making the post

[smute]

hi my darlings i finished my zine and im extremely tempted to say something bad about it right now but im trying not to belittle myself so much. so... 🤫 hope you enjoy <3

[thestrangepoet]

The Ninth Life | The Magnus Archives One Shot

Based on @ultramarinaa's Cat!Martin AU, and not upon @coworkerjonathan's soul-destroying tragic version of it. If you want that version, it's here.

CONTENT WARNINGS: Buttocks-clenchingly sweet fluff. 

DISCLAIMER: I, once again, wrote this in an hour and haven't proofread it. Forgive the typos and any “first draft” vibes. 

──── •✧• ────

[CLICK] 

Oop, yup, it’s on! Right, erm…This is Martin Blackwood, Archival Assistant at the Magnus Institute. I thought it would be a good idea to—

[A VERY LOUD, VERY RASPY HISSING CUTS MARTIN OFF]

[A LONG, WEIGHTY PAUSE FOLLOWS; SOMEONE IS BEING GLARED AT]

What? I-I mean, given the absolute palaver we just went through, shouldn’t we record what happened and how we fixed it? 

[SILENCE FOLLOWS. BUT MARTIN EVIDENTLY GETS HIS ANSWER]

Exactly! Right, so…ah-hem. This is Martin Bla—

[ONCE AGAIN, A LOUD HISS]

What? What is wrong with—No, Jon, you’re going to hit the—!

[CLICK]

[CLICK]

[MARTIN RUFFLES SOME PAPERS, THEN EXHALES LOUDLY THROUGH HIS NOSE. WHEN HE SPEAKS THIS TIME, IT’S SOMEWHAT TAUT]

Statement of Martin Blackwood, Archival Assistant at the Magnus Institute, London, regarding an encounter with a feline-based Leitner book called The Ninth Life. Recorded by subject, October 17th, 2017.

Happy now? 

[LOUD PURRING NEAR THE TAPE RECORDER SIGNIFIES THAT MARTIN HAS INDEED DONE A PASSABLE JOB]

Good, good. Right, oop! Yeah, okay, you can…sit on my lap while I record this. That’s not…that’s not weird at all. Knowing you’re…you’re Jon. 

…You could at least sit like a cat, Jon. No, no, no, don’t get the claws out, it’s fine! Sit how you want! Heh…K-keeping an eye on me, hmm? While I record? Oh, r-right, yeah, ‘Get on with it, Martin’, noted!

So…about ten weeks ago, I came across a book while tidying through some of the old statement boxes. I’m not sure why it wasn’t in the library or in Artefact Storage, but I suppose that’s a mystery for another time. A-anyway, I had a flick through to try to figure out what it was. Could have just been a normal book, you know? E-especially since it wasn’t put away properly, I mean, really, that’s a health and safety risk that wasn’t my fault, and—Ow! Claws! 

R-right, ‘Stay on the subject, Martin’, loud and clear…

Where was I? O-oh, right. So I took it through to the break room, sat down with it, flicked through, read a few…err, well, ten pages to be precise, and basically, it was written like an old fairy tale. Something about a man who turned into a cat to get away from everyone and…W-well, what I’m trying to say is that it didn’t seem like a Leitner! 

I’d probably have finished reading the whole thing, but the microwave dinging made me jump and look up. No one usually uses the microwave outside of lunch hours, but Jon actually makes cups of tea by microwaving mugs of water and then—Ah-ah-ow! N-no, I’m not getting claw-bullied into not telling people the heinous way you make tea, Jon! 

Right, right, fine! Yes, so, microwave dings, I look up from the book, and…I drop the book. And I drop to the floor, a-and the book’s suddenly huge, and there’s Jon, and he’s looking at me, and…

…and I was a cat. I-I-I guess Jon hadn’t noticed me in the break room before putting his mug in the microwave, because he didn’t realise I was me. Next thing I know, I’m being picked up, held over his shoulder, petted and cooed at and—Owwww, claws, claws! Right, okay, no, no one can know Jonathan Sims has a heart, right you are! 

E-erm, so…Yeah. Panicked a bit. I-I tried to make it obvious to the others that it was me, but they just didn’t cotton on. And I couldn’t read the book to figure out if the ending would tell me how to turn back. O-or if I even would turn back. Honestly, in any other situation, I-I might have been really terrified, but it’s hard to keep worrying when people are suddenly stroking you and giving you all this affection. Heh, Jon even named me Champion. 

But, right, I-I really needed to turn back into a human. You know, as lovely as it was to be liked by everyone, I figured, well, it’s deeply unprofessional to turn into a cat at work, isn’t it? And I really didn’t want to be written up for unauthorised absences when I was technically in the room? 

It took a while – I don’t know who moved it, but the book had gone when I managed to slink back into the break room, had to wait for someone to open the door for me, you see – but I eventually found The Ninth Life again. 

It took ages to drag it over to Jon’s desk. And even longer for him to stop laughing and telling me what dedicated little chap I was. He picked up the book though, and I got so excited that someone would finally realise a Leitner was in play that I jumped up onto his desk and…

…and I…erm…I knocked his cup of tea over the book. 

I could feel my heart sinking. What if I’d ruined it? What if the answer was all smudged up? Jon could tell I was upset, and he started trying to pet me and calm me down, mopping up the tea and everything. Took a while before he got back to the book, and, well…the bookplate had been smeared by the spilt tea, I guess, because he didn’t see any mention of Leitner at the front. He started reading the book, and I tried to nudge him to read the back pages first, to get to the answer before the book could turn him into a cat, but he, erm…well, he read it. Five pages, we think. 

And there he was. 

One minute, Jon’s at his desk, the next, there’s a little black cat with too many scars sitting in his chair. 

Well, after he’d stopped hissing, running around the room – Tim thought he had zoomies, ha ha! – and bapping me on the head every time I got close, he realised who I was. 

And then, he bapped me on the head again. 

So. We were both cats! And it’s so funny, because in the office, Tim and Sasha and me, we all say how Jon gives off major black-cat energy? He’s like this poor wet cat in human form, and now that he was a cat, and it turned out, he is…w-well, he’s not very good at being a cat? 

[A LOUD HISS – EVIDENTLY, MARTIN HAS FORGOTTEN JON IS SITTING THERE]

Don’t hiss at me! You know it’s true. I mean, look, you’re literally sitting in my lap now like a human. Cats don’t do that, Jon! It looks weird! 

R-right, okay, let’s, erm, get on with the story – ah, statement, statement! – before I get scratched again. 

S-so, right, Jon wasn’t really getting the hang of being a cat. He kept clambering up onto desks to type on keyboards, trying to tell Tim what was happening. He wouldn’t even jump up onto the desks, he would literally shimmy up the leg like he was climbing a tree. And, yeah, he doesn’t sit in your lap like a cat, all curled up, no no, he sits…like a person sits. So I figured actually, this was pretty good, someone had to realise something was up with this cat that just wasn’t catting. 

But no. No, no, Tim just laughed and named Jon Skrunkly and got on with his day. 

[A LONG, LOW MIAOW OF CONTEMPT IN THE BACKGROUND]

Nooo! You’re not skrunkly at all, Jon! You’re a very handsome little kitty!

[A HISS]

Right, right! Back to work! Erm, yeah, so, there I am, trying to teach Skr–err, Jon how to act more like a cat. Not because it would help get us back to normal, but because I was worried? He kept falling off stuff, not landing on his feet…jumping and missing things…He was having a really hard time, and I figured if we were stuck like this indefinitely, it might help to, you know…teach him a bit? 

And then, one day, he just…vanished. I wandered in one morning from the canteen, ‘cause Sasha had snuck me a plate of milk, and I couldn’t find Jon anywhere. Tim realised pretty quickly that something was up, that I wouldn’t settle down, and then he noticed Skrun–err, Jon, was missing. 

It took days for me to sniff him out. Which is…a really weird thing to say out loud. On record. Erm. I sniffed my boss out. But it’s insane, as a cat, the difference in senses, a-and to be honest, my eyesight was dreadful because I obviously couldn’t wear my glasses. A-anyway, sniffed him out, and realised he had somehow fallen into the tunnels through the trapdoor? Which is weird as well, ‘cause the trapdoor is always closed. No one would have opened it? 

[ANOTHER LOW MIAOW, BUT THIS ONE SOUNDS STRANGELY LIKE SKRUNKLY IS TRYING TO SPEAK – IT ALMOST SOUNDS LIKE HE’S SAYING ‘SASHA!’]

I know, Jon, you’ll tell us when you, erm, get back. 

So, now I knew where he was, I went into full hyperkitty mode. I was zooming around, miaowing, pawing, jumping on Tim, jumping at Tim, launching myself off bookshelves, you name it! Somehow, I managed to get the message across, and Tim went to open the trapdoor. 

I…I hate going into the tunnels. I really, really hate it. But Jon was down there, and as far as we knew, he’d been down there with no food and water for days! So, down I jumped, with Tim clambering after me telling me to slow down. I kept sniffing, and it was actually pretty easy to find him after that! 

There he was, curled up and shaking near a wall, and I ran towards him, miaowing my head off so he knew we were coming to the rescue, and…

And I…changed back. Right there. Just pop! There I was. 

Tim, erm…Tim screamed. Jon hissed and nearly ran away. It was chaos, and…I’m actually surprised all three of us made it out. Especially with Jon going wild on Tim and clawing him every time he tried to pick him up. What was that about, anyway, we were helping you!

[ANOTHER GRUMBLING MIAOW – DID SKRUNKLY SEE SOMETHING IN THE TUNNELS? OR SOMEONE? WAS HE TRYING TO TELL THEM?]

We got back up to the office, Jon in tow, and now that I could speak, Tim, Sasha and I managed to hash out a theory. 

Basically, we figure that there are a lot of Leitner books that kind of do different things depending on how much you read of them. S-so we have one on record, A Disappearance, if you read one line, you disappear for a bit. But, if you read the whole book, you disappear from the world for good. 

I read ten pages of The Ninth Life, and I was a cat for ten weeks. Checks out! So we reckon Jon read about five pages, and it’s been three weeks, so…two weeks of Skrunkly to go!

Right, think that’s it. Yeah! So, erm, if you’re looking for a cure for The Ninth Life, just enjoy your time as a kitty and wait it out! U-unless you read the whole book, in which case, erm…I-I really hope you enjoy your life as a cat. 

End recor–Ow! What did I miss off this time? 

[SEVERAL LIGHT THUDS SOUND]

Why are you pawing the book, Jon? I…oh. Right. 

Erm…I think Jon wants it on record that, erm…the book is eleven pages long. And…and I read ten pages. 

[THUD-THUD-THUD!]

Yes, yes, all right, you microwaving your tea saved me from an eternity as a cat! That does not mean I am going to let you continue to ruin perfectly good cups of tea like that!

[A LOUD MIAOW OF PROTEST. MARTIN SIGHS]

Recording ends. 

[CLICK]