#this felt pointless and stupid
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Golden Fleece
#my art#cotl#cotl lamb#blood#it was really fun to ponder this one#cause in the game sprite the body on the fleece has the scale-like texture but the hem is sharp like the standard fleece#i felt a 2 tiered piece would work nicely to show both of these contrasting elements#the sprite always makes me think of gold scale mail but i wanted to avoid it looking explicitly like armor#since the fleece gives you stacking atk damage in exchange of taking 2x damage when hit#although tbqh gold armor would be fucking pointless anyways. gold is a very soft metal. which may have been the point but w/e#instead i wanted the shapes to be more reminiscent of wool since like. yknow. the golden fleece#and i wanted it to speak of luxury and power but be rather impractical for movement or protection#i just wanted to do an axe for funsies and by wonderful coincidence remembered the godly axe was gold :]#anyways this pose is brought to you by my stupid ass who spun too hard with my upper body when swinging a bat and felt cool for 1 second#before totally unbalancing myself and falling#the instant after this image lambo eats shit. rest in peace
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Based on my favorite gif lately
#my art stuff#digital art#baldurs gate 3#bg3#astarion#batstarion#once again specifying this is a spawn astarion with some sort of wild shape thing#bat#good morning#gif#I’ve been in such a weird place mentally about art lately#I just keep stopping myself from drawing things cus I want to draw Astarion -#- but fsr my brain decided I draw him wrong and thus makes it pointless to even start#bat form is fine - I have no problems with it. But in his normal form? no can do buckaroo.#It’s one part why I haven’t shared much art lately - I don’t get happy enough about the “quality”#then just don’t share it as a result - in turn making me feel worse because I’m not posting - making me doubt myself more - etc etc#idk man - I got way too giddy earlier today cus someone could tell this was Astarion - even though this isn’t even the version of him I -#- feel insecure about#I keep seeing these artists making more realistic art and cool comics and interactions - most of which are shaded really beautifully -#- and all I can think about is how I CAN’T do that - even if it wouldn’t fuck me up mentally#I just put too much stress on my ability to create realism and I keep “failing” at doing that (by actively avoiding it for my own health)#idk man - I just wish I felt better about Astarion’s stupid chin OTL
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no but i found this one video commentary about the final episode and the parts where the tiktoker said "this whole series was basically a torture show for Boston because the writers don't like people like Boston" and "the last episode was just to make sure that we as the audience hate him as much as the writers hate him" and "the writers wanted us to hate Boston so much that they completely changed his narrative" and "my biggest problem was with how they wrote Boston" pretty much sum it all up for me
#she also said “the whole boston and nick thing was stupid as fuck” and I FELT THAT#“they just never stayed on the path of any storyline” “boeing dan and atom basically pointless in the show” I KNOW RIGHT?#“boston is not going to lie to your face - he usually doesn't talk about things but never denies when people confront him” I FUCKING KNOW#idk but this final episode really ruined the whole series for me#only things i liked were boeing shirtless in the pool and my boy nicky realizing that self-love is a thing that actually exists#but beyond that... it's a big no for me#bostonnick storyline ended with episode 11 and i will not consider as canon any scene after that#and unless it's a whole new set of characters and storylines i don't give a single damn about a potential s2 with the remaining characters#only friends the series#only friends#ofts#only friends series#boston only friends#boston ofts#bostonnick
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if i saw sorrentino irl id laugh at his face. why are you even trying bro.
#anyways parthenope is stupid bland pointless superficial arrogant. fully felt the feminism leaving my body#im so angry. legitimately pisses off. im gonna take a walk before i explode in a violent and murderous rage#personal#parthenope
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third playthru antics so far involve gale agreeing to the hag's bargain and getting his eye fucked up in the process <3 and tbh i actually think this is the funniest possible choice they could make as a party since they all dismiss ethel's "netherese magic BLEUGH" reveal as just a symptom of gale already having that shit in his system. like its too much of a coincidence for something so ancient and mythic to happen TWICE to the SAME random guy so theyre all like yeah no shit !!!! gale is the netherese guy !!!! we knew that like a week ago idiot !!!!! foresight is not a gift im givng these people i am so sorry king </3
#tay plays bg3#bg3 spoilers#oc: lilithira#no metagaming in this house we make stupid decisions and live with the absolutely pointless consequences like MEN!!#I DO FEEL BAD INFLICTING *THINGS* UPON MY PARTY THO but lily's beady little eyes are too cute to get ripped out im sorry :(#and shes chomping down worm after worm for the team AND took gut's potion so idk. i think its fair personally#also i feel like if he's That willing to deal with raphael... a hag isnt that much better#its also the only way i could justify doing the ethel quest at all as lily#its so hard playing lawful evil/neutral chara who's lawful in a *business* sense not necessarily a moral sense#i have to justify doing ethel's quest not w all the ethical Mayrina angles but instead the 'oh you didnt hold up your bargain? die <3''#saving mayrina being just a sort of convenient conclusion to that. JHFDGJFKGD#i think if she hadn't felt personally enraged by ethel hurting gale she wouldve taken one look at mayrina and said damn that sucks gl tho#and left <3 no investigation no meddling no nothing <3 who is she to get in the way of a fellow girlboss just trying to make a living ✌#GFJKGFJKGF
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lmao sometimes you get through a book and the only reason it wasn't a COMPLETE waste of time is because it did something Supremely Neat(tm) with structuring, so at least your writer!Brain gets to chew on that for a while
#text#personal#books#writing#anyway im not tagging the title or author here because she is in face on tumblr and that's Mean#but like. yikes.#what a pointless angry hopeless gratuitously violent meaningless book lmao#ma'am get some therapy cuz that was a vent session that did not need to enter the world...#there were a couple scary bits toward the beginning but. honestly mostly i was Bored#i didnt care about either character#needed more haunted house#needed NOT to push fascism off onto a fucking building lolol#needed more than a hatefuck of reconciliation#anyway it was just. very stupid. and i am tired#it felt like the author working through her own trauma. which!! valid!! understandable!!! healthy!!#but like.not in a way that was enlightening for me to see. it felt like a soapbox rant and like self-loathing NOT like a novel i paid $ for#i wish i had kinder things to say but i should just sleep
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if I had to sum up this year in one word I think it would be 'pointless'
#just. could have skipped this one#nothing useful there at all#very very pointless#did nothing. accomplished nothing. felt sad and hopeless most of the time. just... a stupid stupid year all around#I'm so lonely I'm pretty sure it's gonna kill me so that's fantastic#I need affection so bad goddammit someone just hug me please I'm losing my mind.#no that wouldn't even be enough.
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Why do ALL my comfort characters get killed off … like this just happens REPEATEDLY
Data, Tony Stark, Castiel, and now Izzy….can I have ANY favs that survive the narrative?
#mott txt#I’m sure there’s more but whatever . usually I’m not so upset abt it .#Tony and Izzy are the only two that have made me actually cry#like usually if it suits the narrative I’m more okay with it. Izzy’s is the most pointless by far#well Cas and deans deaths were both stupid but that’s par for the course with spn#when tony died I felt like my whole childhood died. but it made it easier for me to let go of the MCU#anyways if it doesn’t matter they’re literally fictional characters#but I relate so hard to Izzy for so many reasons and genuinely didn’t see his death coming#shit hurted
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hheeeuuurrgghppbbtttt
#my dad messaged me today sayin’ he hopes to see me soon and it honestly ruined my day luke#like please leave me alone ://////#then some general normal Every Day BS happened at work and I just had to dip I almost walked off the job no word to my sups#Just makes me think of my mom which#i feel more justified after it I guess ‘cause she’s the one who allegedly approves the messages her husband sent me when we had our fight#tbh life is better w/o her messaging me daily like I spent basically all of 2023#wanting to cut her off and she gave me even the lightest reason to do it so i did and it’s been nice#the pointless guilt I felt for not wanting to see my family has turned into general resentment and annoyance#i don’t even miss her or him like I straight up just don’t want to see my blood relatives they’re not family to me they’re just people#i happen to share genes with like if you really wanted to build a relationship with the person#you forced into this stupid world then maybe you shouldn’t have been such insufferable assholes for the first 18 years#i spent most of my conversations with them over the phone last year basically just saying life sucks and that i want to kill myself#I need them to feel bad for conceiving me i need them to regret it#my cousin Aaron has the right idea tbh like last I heard he wasn’t talking to my uncle or anyone w/ blood relations really#following in his footsteps. I legit just got so full of rage and frustration when my dad messaged me it’s been like 3 weeks since we spoke#it was so obvious that I didn’t like my mom growing up everyone knew it and berated me for it like how am i supposed to accept that?#How am I supposed to take the hate and anger she exhibit and put out there in that unhappy home#and turn the hate and anger her and her family felt towards me for not loving her#and turn that into love? How am I supposed to turn unending anger and hatred and bitterness and just be like ‘yeah i love you’#I love my parents in the sense that I am familiar w/ them and they have had a constant presence in my life up this point and when I was like#8y/o I had some pretty good times w/ my dad that were DIRECTLY related to my mom being out of the house#my mom was just so abusive to that man for 20+ years#and he took the love I had for him and made me hate him by just shoving jesus down my throat#We used to have CONVERSATIONS he & I but then he got his head stuck so far up his ass that he couldn’t see#how he was just ruining everything. Me: Hey so this thing thats goin on?#him: haha yeah that thing thats been goin on!! You know what tho#[starts pitching JC to me again]#that was all I could get from him from 12-18/19#he killed whatever relationship we had together and now it’s a decade later and I have no interest in talking to him#I don’t care to try and rebuild. I don’t want to rebuild anything with him I don’t want him to want that either
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i know it’s been weeks since I watched fury but genuinely what the fuck was up with fury. I’m still baffled by it.
#all things considered given how that era of trek had written off female characters in the past she had a pretty decent sendoff#it was at least built up to and they didn’t kill her in a stupid abrupt way#I was gonna say it’s like if they did yesterday’s enterprise first and then backtracked on it and then I remembered the sela plotline#so tag cancelled. I’d blocked that one out oops.#but yeah just baffling characterization plot that felt out of place and kind of just pointless….why did we do that#voy liveblog#very very late
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#tbh I hate that I like this guy#a week ago he changed my life by kissing me and I’ve never been more confused#it’s driving me nuts#everything was fine and now I’m a mess#i mean it’s really pointless liking him bc he’s not single lmao#and he literally lives hundreds of miles away#but there was some sort of connection and I’ve never felt anything like it before???????#it was like we’ve known each other forever and we could talk about anything#AND HE KEPT LAUGHING AND MY STUPID JOKED WHICH WERE ***NOT*** FUNNY#and I can’t message him anywhere bc I don’t have his number and this idiot managed to get locked out of his instagram account#so I will have to wait until he gets that back lmao if ever#i hate it here#why do i even fucking bother#this isn’t going anywhere#I’m sad#rant over#personal
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it's weird how i've struggled to have any kind of spirituality (it doesn't click in my brain, there's the teeny bit of that Autism Asshole Logic that prevents it); but i AM superstitious. idk if they're the same or not
but sure as fuck, anytime oatmeal is for breakfast at work, a kid vomits. y'can't say that there hasn't been a blood bleach call in a while or you'll get several in a row. you can't comment on how we haven't had to clean a rug either
#its white noise#to specify the spirituality thing; for a while in hs i did tarot readings for fun#but i always felt like a conman doing it yk?#like. reading the interpretations and chattering enough with the person getting the reading; you can make any tarot lineup mean anything#within reason ofc. it just doesn't seem like a higher power or anything. just connecting the dots#also by Autism Asshole Logic i mean the kinda shit that you'd see in. ugh. big bang theory or whatever#the idea that the world runs only on logic so religion is Pointless and Stupid#i dont believe that at all. do what makes you happy and gives you comfort yk?#but being raised by my mom who is Definitely one of those Strict Logic Autistics means it kinda rubbed off on me#there's no real proof of a higher power so.. what's the point? yk?
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random poll but i was just thinking how much i enjoy watching quizzes on tv & just legit really love general knowledge but know a lot of people aren't into it so idk just curious of the views of people following me on here lol????
#if i didnt have so much anxiety running thru my veins i would legit love to do actual quizzing...#i just love knowing irrelevant pointless(ha) things!#also i love getting angry at the question setters lol#like NO it's not me being dumb it's the STUPID wording of that QUESTION >:(((((((#i remember doing an end of term quiz in college and i honestly had never felt more alive lol#polls#also no bald/nuance button cos u have to pick a side lol
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Can this old man hurry up and drop dead
#i cant even go in my own stupid kitchen bc hes down there#im so hungry#which probably isn't helping the pms depression#everything sucks today#it was raining all day and gross and cold and i feel so alone and all my friends are busy or two hours away or in other countries#and yea my mom and brother r here but we all just lock ourselves in our little spaces to avoid the old man so i feel like i dont actually#see them at all and my dad is at work and i just wanna go back to college and be with my friends and everything has felt kinda pointless#and hopeless today and i dont normally feel like this at all but lately my period has been kicking my ass out of nowhere and it makes me#feel like im not in control of my body or my mind and that scares me more than anything cuz it makes me think im turning into my mom#and im in love with my friend because god forbid i keep it together for an extended period of time and i think about them all the time and#its not making me feel any less lonely cuz i just wanna be back at college uuuuuuuuuuuuu#what am i gonna do over winter break????#she speaks!
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i think i’m gonna read magilumiere and acro trip, both of them seem very silly and fun but sincerely love magical girls, which i can always appreciate
#that was my biggest problem i had w the 2010's dark magical girls trend#and is one of the few things i'll praise madoka for - it does like being a magical girl series#sure madoka is dark (and is just kamen rider ryuki with gaim's ending)#but it WANTS to be a magical girl show#every other madoka coat tail rider kinda. resented having to be a magical girl show#even when it was to be a 'dark' show. it felt like they HATED being a magical girl story#so they just poured on the edge and hoped you didn't notice#and i'll admit i don't like most dark mg stuff bc of the dark but the darkness always felt. pointless.#again madoka may be cribbing ryuki but at least they were smart enough to crib the idea that the darkness needs a PURPOSE too#you can't just throw a ton of bad shit at the characters and sneer at their frills#and then say the viewers are stupid bc they don't understand it's supposed to be a tragedy#i did understand that. you just did a bad job at it.#… the point is that i'm glad thing are swinging in a more fun direction#that even if it were to get dark will at least be proud to be A Magical Girl Story#and not be full of dull edged razors with lace hastily thrown on the pit#the Mage rambles
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‘his needy girl’
⋅˚₊‧ 𐙚 ‧₊˚ ⋅ logan howlett x female reader
summary ; can’t stop thinking about logan taking care of his needy girl omfg . like, that man would absolutely put your pleasure over his — taking care of you whenever you wanted, with exceptions, of course — but for the most part hello !??!! especially when he’s really head over heels for his partner aghhh . so enjoy this lil drabble of logan taking care of his sweet girl^^
logan was a strong man. everyone knew that. they all saw his gruff exterior, the rough mutant who had been carrying blood on his hands for centuries, who was even deemed ‘unapproachable’ by some.
yet, those who did try to approach him, either ended up being pushed away or in his bed.
or… in the middle, somehow, and found a somewhat gentle, less rough side of logan: that wasn’t sexual yet also not necessarily mean.
you were in the middle for a while. especially when you met him for the first time — his first thoughts were lustful, greedy, depraved even — if you may — but something inside him stopped him from acting on these actions. maybe your age? you were a little younger than the other women he had been with, and also a little smaller. everyone was small to him, of course, the man was huge, but something about you … there was another side of him that just wanted to treat you gently, handle you with care.
and he had never felt that way about anyone before. well, barely anyone — only a few people had ever reached his heart that way.
he also sensed the same feeling from you, but yours was more… open. well, open is an understatement — you would always cling to the man, trying to grab his attention, asking his opinion on stupid things down to even your outfits sometimes. he found it a bit ridiculous, yet a deep part of him, a part he tried to hide, was tugged at everytime you were near him, at first innocently, like he was willing to have you drag him back to your room just to have him approve of every little outfit you were self conscious of yourself in, but then it got a little more heated: when he would be in the same room as you, even just casually in the kitchen, and you would come in — a scent wafting around you that he knew all too well, a scent only he could pick up on — of your body’s neediness.
and that only increased when you two finally got together.
when you two started dating, he thought you would maybe lay off on the neediness and clinginess; but it only got worse, that even after a night of having logan taking care of all your little problems, you were just as desperate the next day.
“logannn…” you would hum softly — approaching him as he sat on the couch, or the bed, or even when he was just trying to train. anywhere, you would approach him in that innocent little hum, that logan knew all too well by now. he knew, that whenever you skipped over to him like that, he would probably end up dropping whatever he was doing to take you back to whichever bathroom or private room was nearest, just to satisfy his girl.
or, there would be times where he really was tired and didn’t even have the energy for that, usually late at night after training all day or being out. you would come into your guys’ shared room, straddling his lap in an instant with that little hum of yours. he would huff and roll his eyes, his hands however coming to rest up on your hips anyways, enjoying the feeling of being able to squeeze them so easily in his huge hands. “sweetheart, ‘s late. come on, i’ll give you something in the mornin’… not now.” he would try to reason, only making you huff as well, shifting over to move onto his lap — grinding gently onto it already, letting him feel the wetness of your clit through your little sleep shorts and the rough fabric of his jeans. he knew it was pointless to argue with you, and he didn’t want to leave his sweet girl unsatisfied, so he would sigh, giving in with a nod of his head and a rough, verbal confirmation. “alright baby, go ahead..”
your heart would flutter at the granted permission, as well as your stomach as usually during nights like this you would start to grind your sweet, clothed little pussy against his thigh, shamelessly getting off to just the feeling of the strong muscle covered by his jeans nudging your clit with every movement of your hips: back and forth, back and forth — with logan’s hands eventually sliding up your shirt, looking at your already blissed expression, biting back your whimpers and moans the more you humped against his thigh — and as his rough hands played with your pretty tits, until you reached your peak.
or, maybe days where he had more energy. days when eventually he would end up getting worked up too. like when that simple thigh grinding could end up with him pulling you onto his lap instead and finish off by grinding on his bulge, or even riding him — and then there were also times when he would pull you into nearby bathrooms or empty rooms, pulling your skirt or dress up on those days you would dress up for him, and shamelessly lapping at your pussy like a starved man, like he needed this more than you did; the sweet taste of your arousal on his tongue making his dick desperately ache and twitch against his jeans. it drove you absolutely wild those days to see how much he craved you too, how he could barely go a day without getting you on him in someway, whether it be just holding you and kissing you innocently, to being buried into your sweet heat till you were a sobbing mess against him.
anything his needy girl wanted.
#logan howlett x you#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett#wolverine xmen#wolverine x you#wolverine x reader#xmen
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