#this baby is already 9k and all that i can manage to think about | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

katsukisbimbo · 4 years

Text

bun bun

✯ pairing: usagiyama rumi x reader

✯ synopsis: everything changed for you when your favourite hero, usagiyama gets thrown inside your shop.

✯wordcount: 12.4k+

✯warning: fem! reader, she/her pronouns, wlw, swearing :))

✯ note: this is dedicated for lovely andrea <3 aka ms @kagsbuns !! I think I got carried away tho. this was only supposed to be 10k max, but at 9k I still didn’t get to the conflict so here we are LOL. I hope u guys enjoy!! this is my first time writing something so long!

You sighed as you used you picked up the heavy basket of apples. Your day usually consisted of tending to your growing vegetables in the early morning, before picking and washing the ripened vegetables and fruit. Using some fresh peppers from your garden to spice up your usual omelette for breakfast, then getting ready for work.

You currently owned a cute little produce market in the middle of the city, which was only a twenty-minute walk from your home. Your small shop was mostly frequented by old folks and young moms buying fruits and veggies for their children.

You loved your work and your life, tending to vegetables and fruits and selling them. Your work helped you produce a schedule, a schedule that kept you sane.

You smiled as Ms. Takeshi walked in, smiling at you before browsing through her favourite strawberries that you had just picked and washed this morning. “Good morning lovely! Your fruits and vegetables look wonderful today! Did you also make some of my favourite banana bread?” She queried as she made her way to the display case where you kept your freshly made pastries.

“Of course Ms. Takeshi! I already wrapped it up for you!” you handed the bag over to her. “You’re going to be a great wife one day lovely” She smiles as she leaves the door, leaving you with a sour taste in your mouth. Your smile dropped as you activated your quirk. You had a plant quirk, pretty convenient for your work. You were able to manipulate plants and grow them to your will.

Large vines soon began to rise from your potted plants as you started to organize some of your products, not liking how they looked. You rolled your eyes as you recalled what Ms. Takeshi had said to you. Every morning was the same thing with her. Some days she would even try to set you up with her grandson. Yes, you were only 19, turning 20, but you already had everything you wanted. Plus, you didn’t play for the other team.

You were more of a “We fell in love in October” kinda gal.

Your thoughts were swiftly interrupted at the sound of a body getting thrown inside your shop, soon landing right in front of you. It took you two seconds to register that a body just flew into your shop and ruined your blueberries, and another two seconds to figure out that this body belonged to the Rabbit Hero: Mirko herself. You gasped softly as you pried her body out of the rubble with your vines.

You propped her up onto your counter before wrapping your vines around her once more, with the purpose to heal her bruised body. You concentrated your power as you continued to heal her, your vines sprouting flowers and glowing with a light yellow hue.

You had to restrain yourself from cooing when you saw her nose twitch. It wasn’t known that you were fond of heroes. Everyone had assumed that you had no interest in it, when in fact, you’ve been a huge fan of Mirko’s for some time. You did have other heroes you liked, but Mirko had your attention and heart.

You struggled to breathe as you felt your energy being sapped out of your body. You didn’t know how much longer you would be able to take, especially when you had only used your quirk for meagre housework, up until now that is. You suddenly jolted in surprise when Mirko’s arm shot up and grabbed you by the collar of your shirt, bringing your face barely ten centimetres away from hers.

As her mouth opened to speak, another crash occurred nearby, making both of your heads snap up in the direction of the noise. You gaped as you saw the wrongdoer slowly walk towards your shop. “Mirko-san, please get up” you shakily whispered to her.

She laughed at your cute shivering figure before jumping up on top of the counter. “Come at me bitch!” she provoked before they hastily jumped her. You quickly threw yourself out of the way and hid behind your apples. “Hey! Baby carrot!” she hollered as she pinned down the villain. “Get out of here!” Rumi growled. You immediately shook your head, small tears sliding doing your cheeks.

“I-I can’t! I’m not gonna let either of you mess up my shop!” you weakly yelled as you somehow mustered up enough strength to summon your largest vines, speedily sending them towards the villain and entrapping them, leaving Mirko to gape at your work. She whistled as she observed the vines twining around the body of the unfortunate villain. ‘T-That’s kinda hot, not gonna lie’ she thought in her head before successfully knocking the villain out with one kick.

“Hey, you okay there?” she questioned as she looked at your trembling figure. You felt unable to respond to her query, your throat suddenly closed up. You let out a squeak in response before feeling your knees buckle, your body quickly tumbling to the ground. Before you could even graze the wooden floor, Miruko already had her arms wrapped around you, carrying your unconscious body princess style, your face nuzzled onto the top of her breast.

“My poor bunny” she cooed before wiping the sweat off your brow, taking you to the closest ambulance to get the both of you checked out.

___

You groaned as the exhaustion started to seep into your body. Your head was killing you. You peeled your eyes open, expecting to see your room, only to see a blindingly white hospital room. A few machines monitoring your blood pressure and heart rate had been situated by your side, along with your IV drip which was currently connected to your left arm.

“I see you’re up” voice booms, making their presence known.

You turned to see Mirko, sitting on the couch, clad in civilian clothing. You blushed as her outfit consisted of a black leather jacket, accompanied by tight black jeans, a white v-neck shirt, and chunky leather shoes. To sum it all up, she looked delectable. You felt your cheeks warm at the sight of your hero crush. What was she doing here in the first place? Wasn't she supposed to be on patrol or something? What was she doing, wasting her time on a girl like yourself?

You cleared your throat before piping up. “W-why’re you here?” you questioned before quickly averting your gaze.

“You saved my life, my little carrot” She started, standing up and making her way towards your bed. You felt yourself slightly flinch back, intimidated by both her figure and her aura. Mirko had an intense vibe that made you want to crawl into a hole and die. The way she carried herself was both overwhelming and admirable. She was just so captivating, it was like-

“Hey. Hey!” she snapped her fingers in your face. “What’s wrong carrot? Are you nervous? Last time I saw you, you were brimming with complete and utter confidence. Well, kinda, but you were still badass. Are you a badass or was that just a facade to impress lil ol’ me? Hm?” she teases, her face nearing yours.

“I-I no! I mean y-yes! Um!” you felt yourself about to tear up from embarrassment. You were humiliating yourself in front of your favourite hero. You sputtered once more before deciding to just shut your mouth, staring at your lap where your hands were neatly folded.

“What’s wrong carrot? Do I make you nervous?” she taunted.

God, now you wanted to cry.

You felt your tears starting to arise, your throat closing up. Your lips were quivering. You tense your jaw to prevent any whimpers from slipping out, you didn’t want to embarrass yourself any further. Mirko's eyes almost bulged out of their sockets. She made her poor carrot cry!

She immediately took your hands off of your lap, bringing one of your hands to rest against her soft cheek. She then gave your palm a soft kiss. “Don’t cry! I didn’t mean to tease ya that much!”. You just nodded as you felt yourself become light-headed at her actions. The Pro-Hero Mirko just kissed your palm. She just kissed your palm. You didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

You were unaware of how to act in front of her as you didn’t want to make a fool of yourself any further than today. You would always remember the time you embarrassed yourself in front of your hero crush.

“What happened by the way? Why am I here?” you piped up, taking the time to admire her bright and shining face.

“Well, I accidentally got thrown into your shop and got knocked out. You used your little vines to help me out! I passed out a little, but the villain came, and I tried to fight him, but before I could do some real damage, you stepped in and told us that you weren’t about to let us ruin your shop and apprehended the villain by yourself! I didn’t know you had it in ya! I was so surprised but I managed to knock out the fella! You also ended up passing out dear! I had to catch ya and carry you to the ambulance myself!” She grinned, playing with your fingertips.

“I’m so sorry“ you cried, gripping tightly onto her fingers. “I didn’t mean to make your job harder for you! I‘m only nineteen and I don’t have enough money to repair any of the damages! Are there even damages? For sure there are!” you were about to cry again. Everything was just so overwhelming that your first reaction was to cry.

You’ve only met Mirko and you’ve managed to embarrass yourself three times.

“Don’t worry about it, carrot. I already took care of the damages, because I was the one who got thrown into your shop. Don’t worry about being a crybaby either. It’s cute” she gave you her signature toothy grin.

“I-Thank you! Thank you so much Mirko-san!” You cried, bowing as low as you could in your state.

“Don’t worry about it” she brushed off.

“Please! I have to repay you somehow! I can give you a free produce? I can make your bread? I can't offer much” your brows furrowing. You wanted to repay her.

“Yeah? I’ll think of something, cutie. Anyways, I gotta run, I’ll see you around yeah?” She quipped before making her way out of her room, giving you one last smile before exiting.

You had it bad for her. For sure.

___

It’s been a week since you were discharged from the hospital, you didn’t have any fatal wounds but was only admitted for overusing your quirk, you didn’t use your quirk for anything as exhausting as apprehending a criminal.

You sighed as you continued to tend to your vegetables, already missing a certain someone’s presence. Meeting with her, even for such a short time was an experience.

You clicked your tongue as you checked the time, you only had half an hour to make your way to work and set up your produce.

You wondered if you would be able to see her again.

You continued to bustle around, seeing Ms. Takeshi rushing inside. “Oh my goodness! Are you all right lovely? I heard about the attack! Thank goodness you’re okay!” she continued to check your body for any bruises or wounds, sighing in relief when she found none.

“I’m fine Ms. Takeshi! I wasn’t attacked, a Pro got thrown into my shop.. and she saved me” your mind drifted to the memory of Mirko lunging at the criminal, putting her body in front of yours to shield you from any attacks.

“She saved me” quipped up a voice.

Both you and Ms. Takeshi had whipped your head around, seeing Mirko, clad in her hero costume with her hand on her hip. She smirked at your bewildered reaction before moving further into the store.

“M-Mirko-san! What’re you doing here?”

“I don’t know, to be honest, I was in the area and I just missed your face” she walked around, admiring the large carrots you had grown in your garden.

“Y-you missed me? I-I missed you too, M-Mirko-san..” you blushed, averting her piercing gaze. “You’re such a precious carrot, call me Rumi” she offered, stretching her hand out to yours in a handshake, you hesitantly took it, noting how her hand dwarfs yours.

“I couldn’t possibly!” releasing her hand. “Why not? We’re friends aren't we?” your eyes widened at her implication that you two had something more than just a fan and idol relationship.

“I-I YES! Of course, we are!” you rushed, not wanting to upset her. If she was willing to call you her friend then who were you to disagree? Not everyone has the chance to be friends with their favourite idol.

Ms. Takeshi smirked as she watched the exchange between the two, noting how each of them had quite a fond look in their eyes. She shook her head as she signalled you that she was about to leave, you gave her a hasty goodbye before going back to Mirko-- or Rumi, as she preferred.

‘Those two are getting together’ Ms. Takeshi absently thought, smiling at the thought of you finally having the companion you deserved.

“This is a cute place ya got here, it's almost as cute as you” she flirted, smirking at your abashed expression. Normally you would have cringed at such a cheesy line, but to be honest, it hit a little different when it was Rumi who was saying it. “I’m not cute!” you huffed. You were a strong independent woman! You were not cute.

As you continued to stew in your thoughts, Rumi proceeded with exploring your cute little shop, sampling some fruits as she passed by. “D’ya have any family here?” she queried, popping a plump, red strawberry in her mouth, almost gasping at the sweetness and freshness of the berry. “I don’t actually! I moved here just a year ago to start the shop I've been dreaming about ever since I was a kid!” you smiled, recalling the obstacles you had gone through to reach your goal.

“That's good! It’s good to have goals you want to work towards, it keeps people motivated”

“How about you Rumi-san? Do you have any family here?” you piped up, curious of her families’ whereabouts. Did she live here alone? There was only so much information that could be disclosed to the public about heroes and their personal lives.

“They don’t live here. They’re back in my hometown. It’s nice living out here, I get to do what I want, save all the people I can, and kick as much as... Though, there are times where I miss my family... They’re a rambunctious and chaotic bunch I tell ya!” she chortled.

You felt yourself melt at the very thought of Rumi with her family, playing and spending time with her small cousins/siblings. If someone were to describe the look on your face, they would have immediately said that you looked either lovesick or had heart eyes. You blushed at the thought of spending time with Rumi and just being gay <3 with each other. You honestly needed to get a love life, it isn’t normal to fantasize about your idol, especially when they’re right in front of you.

Rumi noticed that you were mentally elsewhere, smiling at your dumbstruck expression. What were you thinking about that was more interesting than her? Was it perhaps Rumi herself? She shook her head, trying to disperse her somewhat indecent thoughts. It wasn’t proper to ogle or fantasize about your friend.

“Hey, can I get your number?” she piped up, causing you to snap out of the internal conflict you were previously having about yourself. “W-what?” you stuttered, unbelieving of the fact that she, Usagiyama Rumi, had just asked for your number. Plain, old, little you! This was an absolute dream.

You quickly nodded, having no words as you haven’t fully processed her question or the meaning of it. You struggled to extract your phone from the pocket of your overalls. Curse women's clothing and their tiny pockets! Rumi laughed at your struggles, loving at how you scrunch your cute little nose when you feel feelings of frustration.

“Aha! I got it!” you cheered, fist-pumping with your phone in your hand, before sheepishly handing your phone to her. Rumi raised a brow. “Is this me as your lock screen?” she smirked.

At this point, you were begging the Gods, any God, to take your soul. You did not understand how you could have forgotten such a crucial thing! You were an idiot! A dumbass!

“And, did you edit yourself in the picture so it looked like we took a picture together?”

You felt your brain short circuit. You froze up, unblinking and unbreathing. Rumi didn’t mean to tease you so much. You were just adorable! The fact that you had been too shy to ask her for a picture and kept the edited one as your lock screen amused her to no end. She just wanted to eat you up!

As she continued to gush about your cute habits and you in general, you were tearing yourself up inside. You thought you had changed your lock screen a few days ago! It was a picture of Rumi as well, but you weren’t included. She must think you’re desperate! Or a stalker. Or worse! A desperate stalker!

“Lord, please take me” you whispered, hoping that someone would grant your wish this time. “What was that baby carrot? You want me to take you? I don’t mind, but I wanna get to know you better first”

Your jaw dropped at Rumi’s insinuation. “I’m kidding! You're adorable. C’mere” she beckoned, not wanting to keep her waiting you immediately made your way towards her side, her muscular arm scooping you up and pressing you against her warm body.

“R-Rumi-san..! What are you doing?”

“Taking a picture ya dummy! Make this your lock screen okay? I want everyone to know” she winked. She pressed her face against yours before capturing a picture. You felt as if your face was on fire. She was smashed against you! “Hey, you okay with fanservice?” she asked, you nodded your head, curious of what she had under her sleeve.

Rumi soon grabbed a hold of your chin before pressing her soft lips against the chub of your cheeks. She quickly snapped the picture, capturing your embarrassed face. She let go of you, opting to check the pictures to see if they had come outright. “You want one more baby carrot?” she mused, peering at your warmed face.

You slowly nodded your head, she threw her head back and laughed, coming over once more and wrapping you in her arms. This time, she walked, well, more like waddled, as you were in her arms, to put your phone on the counter, setting the timer for three seconds. She hugged you tightly, resting her head on top of yours.

Since she was already taking pictures, might as well request some poses right?

“Can we do peace signs? I… I like peace signs” you mumbled, twiddling with your thumbs. “Oh gosh, you're adorable!” she gushed. “Peace!” the both of you posed as the flash went off.

You ran back to your phone, eager to see how the pictures had turned out while Rumi had stayed behind, watching your excited figure. Your eyes lit up as you examined the photos you both had taken. They were adorable! “Rumi-san looks very pretty” you mumbled, unaware that she was now peering over your shoulder and heard what you had said.

“You gotta stop tempting me, baby carrot. As I said, I wanna get to know you better” she smiled. You blushed. This was the second time she had mentioned that. Does she like you as well? You felt a little bold so you decided to take your opportunity to fluster her as well.

“If you wanna get to know me better, why not go to lunch with me?” you offered, slyly smiling at how her jaw was left ajar. “Y-You cheeky little brat! If you're free right now we can go but it’ll be my treat okay?” she insisted, raising her brow as if to say ‘are you going to say no to free food’.

You nodded and agreed, who were you to say no to free food? Especially free food with your favourite hero/crush. She extended her hand towards you and you gladly took it, lacing your fingers with hers, loving how both of your hands fit perfectly within each other.

“Let’s go baby carrot. I’ll make sure to feed you lots”

___

“Nooo-- Rumi no more!”

“It’s okay carrot, I know you want more” she smirked

“I can’t! I-It’s too much” you moaned, rubbing your bloated stomach with both of your hands. Both of you had eaten too much chicken! Rumi decided to challenge you to an eating challenge, ordering a whole 10 piece box for each of you. That, plus the drinks and fries she had ordered on the side.

“Awh you’re so cute, for sure you’ll be sleepy” she cooed, propping her chin upon her fist. “I’m thankful for you Rumi-san, but if I eat more, I’ll surely explode” you cried, wanting to just go home and nap. You closed your eyes and leaned back. You couldn’t even breathe properly anymore! She was going to stuff you full! [;)]

“Hye, carrot. I gotta ask since I want both of us to be on the same page. Was this a date? I mean, would you consider this a date?” she sheepishly asked, bringing warmth to your cheeks. You didn't perceive this as a date, since you two never really outright stated it was a date, but it did seem date-ish.

Rumi watched as you struggled to come up with an answer. “Ah! I didn’t mean to pressure you carrot! I’m sorry! I-I just really like you, and if you didn’t consider this as a date, I would like to take you out--that's only if you agree! As I said, no pressure cutie”

What was she talking about? This was so much pressure! On the bright side, your crush likes you back. This was a miracle! She was famous on top of that1 not that you liked her for her popularity, but she could have anyone, and she chose you! You had to thank which God was looking out for you, or if it was just your luck. Either way, you’ve been manifesting this for some time. Not exactly this situation, but you had actively been looking for a partner, a female partner at that. You didn’t want anything serious, shoutout to Ms. Takeshi though, she was trying at least.

“I like you Rumi-san and I considered this as a date! And.. and I want to go on more dates with you!” you nearly yelled, causing some heads to turn. This had caused Rumi to gasp, scrambling out of her chair to sit beside you and engulf you in her arms, nuzzling her soft cheek against yours.

“You’re so cute! I swear! Let me take you home! I just wanna eat you!” she gushed, uncaring of the peering eyes in the restaurant who had been watching the whole exchange. “R-Rumi-san! How lewd!” you grimaced. sure was a handful.

“I’m sorry, cutie! I just can’t help it! You make me wanna go feral” she growled the last bit, feeling a coil in your lower tummy tighten. What was she doing to you? Did someone hit you with a quirk? This was crazy!

“Hey, don’t think too much about it. You and I are going to get to know each other better okay? Okay, carrot?” She grinned, peeking down at your flustered expression. This was going to be something else.

___

Lately, you and Rumi have gotten closer. You both had started to frequently text and call each other, though you have been a little timid during phone calls. They were mostly carried by Rumi and her extroverted personality. You hope she knew that you were just shy and that you weren’t losing interest in her.

Your relationship with Rumi had no label, at least for now. You both decided that it would be wise to learn about each other before making rash decisions. Especially you. You had a habit of running off in tandem and making yourself worry about scenarios that have zero percent of happening. Good thing Rumi was there to calm your nerves.

You were so immersed in your thoughts that you had failed to notice the stop sign in front of you, promptly running into it and talking on your butt. Luckily, nobody except a small child had seen you embarrass yourself. That’s what you thought at least, until—

“Baby carrot! Are you alright?! My poor little carrot didn’t see the stop sign! Are you okay? Do you need to be taken to the hospital? I can take you!” She rambled as she checked your body for any extensive injuries, sliding her hands down the curve of your ass in the process. You didn’t wanna go to the hospital as you would be an unnecessary burden to all the medical staff. It was still better to be safe than sorry.

She was a different breed.

“I can’t help it, I just.. I care about you” she murmured, facing off to the side to hide her warming cheeks from your view. She was adorable! Is this what she felt when she saw you blush? It was a nice feeling. Like eating really good food. Rumi blushing was good food.

“Well, um, if you don't wanna go to the hospital, do you just want to come over for dinner or something?” she offered. “Aren’t you patrolling right now Rumi-san? I would hate to impose and possibly get you in trouble with your work” you sheepishly looked away from her gaze, unable to compete with the intensity her eyes hold, as if she wasn't a quivering little mess two seconds ago as well.

“Nah. I can get someone to cover for me. Let me call them right now so that I can put your mind at ease yeah?” she detached herself from you and went to grab her phone strapped on the side of her somewhat revealing hero costume. You never really noticed it but Rumi’s costume was, how do you say this, very sexy. At least to you.

You shook your head as dirty thoughts soon started to fill your head. This was wrong! Rumi-san is a strong beautiful woman who shouldn’t be objectified! She does not deserve that! Though she looked very beautiful in it, that was for sure.

As you continued to have another internal battle with yourself, Rumi had already dialled Hawks’ number.

“Yo Hawks! It's Mirko! I need a favour!”

“What is it?”

“Please cover for me. I’m on patrol and I just asked my crush out for dinner at my place but she’s iffy because she doesn’t want me to get in trouble for ditching my patrol--”

“You are ditching your patrol though” he replied. Rumi can already see Hawks using this against her.

“PLEASE! She’s so beautiful and I like her so much” Rumi practically begged.

“Fine, but I’m doing this because you’ve never seemed so serious for anyone before and I’m happy for you. You don’t have to owe me” he sighed, but Rumi knew that he didn’t mind at all.

“Thank you so much! Bye! Muah!” she yelled, before facing you. “Hey little carrot, you can come over! I told you my friend was gonna cover me” she smiled, her shiny teeth showing. “I-I..let’s go!” you blushed, wanting to be able to hide your cheeks from her.

“H-Hey, slow down! Plus I haven’t got any ingredients! We gotta go shopping first!”

“S-shopping? Together? That’s quite domestic”

“Better get used to it”

___

“Are you allergic to anything my little carrot?” she questioned, wanting to know which ingredients she should take. “Ah! I’m allergic to shellfish” you mentioned. “I get hives and sometimes my throat closes up”. You stressed that your allergy wasn’t a big deal, but Rumi thought otherwise. “Hm, no seafood then” she pondered on what to get next. “How about pasta?”

“Oh-I still eat shellfish, but just not often” you spoke, hoping she would overlook this small thing. “That’s not good carrot! You can die like that!” she yelled, catching the attention of most of the customers within the vicinity. “R-Rum-san! Not so loud!” you mumbled, tugging onto the fabric of her hero costume. “I’m okay Rumi-san! I promise!”

Her concern for you was adorable. Nobody had ever really cared for you like this. You knew your limits and everything, and everyone knew as well, but it was a nice change. The way Rumi cared for you gave your tummy butterflies. Her smile, the way she spoke. You might be in love. For sure, it’s too soon to tell. You’ve also never felt love other than familial love or love for your friends, but you were sure this was love.

You haven't known Rumi for a long time, but love isn’t about the time you spend, it’s the experiences you both share. If you could describe the way you felt in a word, it would be love. The way Rumi plagued your mind 24/7, the way you felt your heartbeat a little harder than it usually does. This felt like love. Of course, you weren’t about to tell her, but you already had a love for her from the beginning. It had just grown into something more than idolization for her the more you got to know her. Loving Rumi gave you absolute euphoria. Even if her feelings for you were platonic.

“Hey, baby carrot? Let’s go?” she asked, already pulling you towards the exit of the store, waving at some fans who had called out her name.

You were still lost in thought. You never understood why she was attracted to you, it wasn’t love, but even her attraction was questionable. To you, it seemed like a whole joke. The fact that your idol even offered to cook for you was baffling, not even that, the fact that she even spoke to you was a miracle itself. You felt tears well up in your eyes. There was just no way that Rumi would actually like you.

Too lost in your head, you bumped into Rumi who had suddenly stopped, though she wasn’t facing you. She tightened her grip on your hand “I can smell your tears, why are you crying Y/n?” she whispered before whipping around to face you. Her face was riddled with sadness, her ears flopping down at the sides of her face. “D-Did I do something?” she stuttered. She loosened her grip on your hand, letting go completely.

You felt your heartthrob in your chest. That was the exact opposite! You were crying because you were happy with her, too happy almost. You never wanted it to end. You sobbed a little harder before running to her, burying your face into her chest. Her arms wrapped around you, rubbing your back and pressing soft kisses on the crown of your head.

“I’m sorry! I’m a crybaby! I was crying because spending time with you made me happy! Very happy! I don’t want it to stop! I wanna stay with you forever Rumi-san!” you cried, hugging her tighter as if she was about to evaporate into thin air and never come back. “Baby... I...Can I kiss you?” she whispered, bringing her warm hand to rest upon your tear-stained cheek.

Your eyes widened. Did she want to kiss you? Well, who were you to deny her? You nodded your head and shut your eyes, feeling the press of her lips against yours. She pressed multiple kisses against your lip before swiping her tongue against your bottom lip, causing you to let out a soft whimper at the contact.

She grinned and did it once more, this time letting go of the groceries in her hand before pressing you into the bricked walls of the alleyway. Rumi had her hand on your hip and the other against your cheek, your arms wrapped around her and tangled in her soft, silky hair. You moaned as she pried her way into your mouth, exploring it with her tongue before you let out a whine that caught her attention.

She pulled away to see the work she had done, she had left you flustered and fucked out, just from a kiss. She leaned over to press another soft kiss onto your lips before slowly pulling away again. “I like you, so please believe me when I say so. I want to have more good memories with you. Don’t cry okay? You have me, and I’ll never let go” she whispered before rubbing her nose against yours.

You giggled as she pulled away, almost surprising her. It was stupid of you to think so negatively. You knew that Rumi would never do anything to hurt you, well, not on purpose at least. You nodded before picking up the groceries on the floor. You smiled. “Let’s go home, Rumi-san”

Her eyes sparkled at the fact that you had called her apartment “home”. She quickly nodded before helping you with the bags, opting to hold all with her one hand so that she could use the other to hold yours.

___

“We’re finally here!” yelled, making her way to the kitchen to drop off the groceries, you took off your shoes before entering and following her. Her apartment was pretty luxurious. It was one of those gated places that needed I.D and permission to enter, in other words, it was high end. It was to be expected honestly, she was a very famous hero who had some very..determined fans.

Her apartment was mostly white, it didn’t have that many decorations, mostly since Rumi was quite a simple person who had no desire for such things. She did have matching furniture though. You walked through the living room, taking a moment to gaze at her white and grey furniture. It all matched! She had a knack for interior design. If she wasn’t a pro, she would have made some money off being an interior designer.

You finally made your way into the kitchen. Seeing Rumi already putting the groceries away, setting out the ingredients. You gaped at the various ingredients laid out on the counter, why hadn’t you noticed the number of ingredients she had picked up?! There were quite a few.

“Rumi-san? Why’d you get so many ingredients?” you queried, tilting your head to the side in confusion. “Cuz! We’re gonna make a lot of food!” she cheered, raising her fist that was currently holding a pork bun, slightly squishing it and slightly deforming it.

“R-Rumi-san the pork bun!”

“Oh, haha! Sorry about that baby carrot” she apologized before splitting it in half and pressing it against your lips. Did she want to share? A-And feed you as well? You couldn’t refuse so you shyly took a bite, taking a small piece of the pork bun in your mouth and chewing. You moaned at the wonderful flavours dancing on your tastebuds, this tasted so good! It was still quite warm as well.

As the both of you continued to stand in eat in the kitchen, neither of you noticed a familiar flying birdman hovering above the balcony, peering at the both of you with a happy smile on his face before flying away.

“She’s lucky she has me as her friend” Hawks laughed as he continued his patrol. Hopping off of the balcony and flying away like a little weird fairy man.

___

You both had finished cooking, there was a surprising amount of dishes you two had made. Your meal consisted of a wide but healthy assortment of dishes. It was no surprise that Rumi cared about what she was putting inside her body.

“Come on baby carrot, let's go eat yeah?”

You nodded and brought as many plates as you could to the counter, pulling up a chair while Rumi took a chair to sit beside you, promptly digging into her food. “This is so yummy! Where did you learn how to cook like this? I’m not a bad cook myself--” that much was obvious, “-but you cook well carrot!” she gushed, quickly swallowing the food in her mouth.

“Ah-you're giving me too much credit Rumi-san!” you cried. Your cooking was mediocre at best and she was likely just gassing you to make you feel better. You were unsure of why she was hyping you up, though, you weren’t going to question it. Your mind suddenly drifted back to the kiss you both shared, heat rising onto your cheeks.

You slapped your cheeks, trying to get any indecent thoughts to exit your head. This caused Rumi to laugh and take another bite of her food, used to your unusual behaviour already. You blushed, though this time, you were less embarrassed than usual. If she had already liked you after knowing you were weird, then why hold back?

“Hey baby carrot, why do you call me Rumi-san? It just seems a little too formal.. and I wanted us to be a little closer than that? I mean, I have a nickname for you”

This wasn’t the first time that you had thought of giving her a nickname. You were nervous as to what she would say about it. Would she think it was stupid? Would she hate it? Would she make fun of you for it? Of course not, but your thoughts were going a mile a minute and you didn’t have any time to filter them out.

“I’ll think of one for you, but please give me some time to do so!”

“Of course baby carrot” she replied before quickly getting back to eating as she motioned for you to do the same.

The both of you had just finished eating, already washing the remaining dirty dishes, including the pots and pad you had both used to cook. It was quite a domestic and intimate sight. Both of you, side by side. Both washing the dishes. and the other drying.

As of right now. You were in complete and utter bliss. You’ve had a taste of euphoria and that was Rumi. It was amazing how one person could affect another so much.

“Hey, it’s getting late. Do you wanna sleep here?” She piled up. Drying a plate before placing it on the dish rack. Meanwhile. Your mind was once again in distress. Why was she so casual about these types of things? Of course, you wanted to sleep beside her, and cuddle close to her, and gee her soft skin brush against yours, and—you get the idea.

You were a bit hesitant as you didn’t want to overstay your welcome or burden her even further. No matter what she said, you knew that a hero wouldn’t be able to drop their patrol just on the dot. She broke the rules and you knew it. You didn’t want her to be making reckless decisions just because of you!

“I-I... Am I already overstaying my welcome,” you asked, trying to make sure she wanted this and that she didn’t feel obligated to let you stay for whatever reason? You just wanted a good reason for you to be here.

“It’s late. I would walk you home to ensure your safety, but right now, there’s a lot of villains lurking and to be honest, I’m not sure if I can take them all while protecting you at the same time”

She wasn’t lying. If it was just her. For sure she’d be able to go all out and defeat as many villains as she could. She was in the top fen for heaven’s sake! She was just afraid that you’d get caught in the crossfire and end up injured, kidnapped, or worse, dead.

“Oh.. okay” you mumbled, finishing up washing the dishes. Right now. You were unsure of what to do, she was still unfinished with drying the dishes and had suggested you slept over. Sure you trusted her, but, were you ready to sleep beside her? Were you ready to let her head you snore? Were you ready to let her see your horrible bedhead in the morning? Quite frankly, you were unsure if you were ready at all.

“But if you want to, I can take you home, it’s your choice. I’ll gladly defend you and protect you carrot” she had quite the facial expression. You could tell that she was determined. Her sheer determination was held in her eyes, her lips pulled up in a smirk and her eyebrows furrowed.

“I don’t want to be more of an inconvenience, so I’ll just choose the less inconvenient option. I’ll sleep here tonight but I’m taking the couch” you announced. She was going to take it or leave it! You were not going to go into her private space and make her share her rooms and bed.

“Fine. But. Please feel free to move inside if you’re uncomfortable. I know that couch seems like a good couch to sleep one, but it’s only good for sitting really. More like decoration if you were going, to be honest.

“Fine, but I promise that I won’t!” you stubbornly added. Wanting to make sure that she understood that you weren’t going to sleep beside her. You were fine sleeping on the couch and she had to understand that! She smiled before giving you a change of clothes, some pillows and blankets, including a spare toothbrush.

“I’ll be in my room okay? Goodnight carrot” she bid you goodnight before entering her room, not fully shutting it. You fixed up the couch before making your way into the bathroom, passing by Rumi’s bedroom and seeing her shadow move around as her door was left ajar. You changed your clothes and cleaned up, getting ready to take your place on the couch.

You charged your phone and closed your eyes, waiting to drift off into sleep.

___

You screamed as you were being chased by a villain, it was in the early hours of the morning, you could tell as the sun was coming up and it just had that morning vibe. You were used to getting up this early and were familiar with it. What you failed to comprehend was why a villain was chasing you?

It seemed as if it was only about five a.m or six a.m at the latest, but surely by now, there would have been cars driving around. You peeked behind you and saw that the villain had caught up, as he was about to grab you, you suddenly fell off a cliff, your stomach-dropping, your voice stuck in your throat before letting out a shriek and waking up in a cold sweat. What type of dream was that?

“Baby carrot! Are you alright?” said a worried Rumi who already had a glass of water at your side. You tried to take the cup from her but she noticed how shaky your hands were and decided that it would be best to help you drink herself. You slowly gulped down the water, not wanting to choke. You were heaving for air after drinking, maybe you didn’t slow down as much as you had needed to.

“I-I had a bad dream! I was being chased by a villain and I was all alone! Then when he was about to catch me, I fell off of a cliff!” you explained, recalling the haunting images of the unknown man who had almost caught you. Rumi wrapped her arms around you and had placed you onto her lap, patting your head and rubbing your hands to comfort you.

“How about you sleep in my room and I sleep here? Are you comfortable with that?” she whispered, not wanting to startle you while in such a vulnerable state.

“No.. please stay beside me bun. I wanna sleep beside you if that’s all right” you blushed, averting her gaze as you were embarrassed to have mentioned the nickname you had been thinking about for her. It was something you had been thinking about and whilst being cliche, it still suited her quite well.

“B-Bun? That's such a cute nickname! A little cliche, but still cute! I love it so much and I’m so happy that my cute little carrot thought of it for me!” she gushed, holding you even tighter against your body, almost squeezing the life out of you.

“I’m glad you like it bun”

“I do carrot. Let’s go to bed now yeah?” she offered, placing your figure down on the couch before straightening herself out and standing up, stretching her arm your in your direction, asking you to take it. You gladly placed your hand in hers, pushing yourself up and sticking beside her as you both made your way to the bed.

Rumi let go of your hand and made herself comfortable on the bed, making space for you as she moved the large and fluffy comforter and patted the spot, beckoning you to come to take your place beside her. You reluctantly sat on the bed before fully laying flat on your back, awkward and unmoving as you felt Rumi’s eyes on your still figure.

“You can turn on your side and face me y’ know” she piped up.

“I’m nervous” you admitted, not wanting to gaze into her eyes.

Rumi laughed before placing her hand on your cheek, coercing you into facing her direction. You hesitantly obliged and turned your whole body to face her, still avoiding her piercing eyes. She laughed once more before inching her face closer to yours, both of your lips just an inch away from each other.

“Don’t be a nervous baby carrot, it’s only me” she reassured, stroking the chub of your cheek while you relished in the feeling of the soft pads of her fingers stroking your face. You placed your hand on top of Rumi’s, pressing your face even harder against her palm. Rubbing your cheek against her warm hand.

“Can I kiss you bun? I wanna kiss you so badly” you softly whined, feeling yourself in the hands of Rumi. Instead of replying she decided to just press her lips against yours, moaning at the feeling of your soft plush lips.

“Baby carrot” she whimpered, pulling you impossible closer to her, your chests and thighs pressed against each other. You felt arousal consume your whole body, a tight coil forming in your stomach. You whimpered needlessly as Rumi sucked your tongue while wrapping your leg around her hip, placing her hand on the curve of your ass.

You continued to whine and moan as Rumi caressed your body, her tongue pulling you in and leaving you in a trance. You pulled away, feeling yourself get lost in Rumi herself.

“If we continued any longer, I would’ve passed out for sure” you sighed, pressing soft kisses on her lips and moving to scatter kisses on her cheeks. She closed her eyes, relishing in the pleasure of you peppering her face with soft kisses. “That’s okay baby carrot, we’ll take it to slow okay?” she took her turn at peppering your cheeks with kisses, making sure to kiss each untouched spot.

“I like you” you confessed, this time using the courage that had magically shown up to your advantage. You swiped the hair out of her face, wanting to see her. “I like you more,” she replied, kissing the tip of your nose.

___

“Ah~ This is the life! Getting your hair braided by a cute girl while she feeds you!: she chortled, leaning back into your lap as you continued to braid small pieces of her hair while taking small breaks to grab the chopsticks and feed her. You enjoyed watching Rumi relax and eat. It was somewhat satisfying.

“Don’t you have work today bun?” you asked, feeling much more comfortable than you were from before. After you had spent the night at her place, your relationship with her had only gotten stronger. You felt closer than ever and felt as if nothing could break the pair of you up.

“Nah baby carrot, this is a once in a lifetime thing us heroes call a ‘day off’” she joked, looking behind to face you. “But I’ll be busy this week okay? I don’t want you to worry so I’m just letting you know that I’ll be on the down-low”

It was quite upsetting to see your crush? Girlfriend? Partner? You didn’t even know what to call her. The both of you still hadn’t put a label on your relationship, not that it was a problem, but you wanted to know if she was in it for the long ride or if this was something casual. If it was something casual you would prefer to break it off. You didn’t appreciate sharing your significant other with anyone.

“Okay bun, I’ll wait for you” you had just settled on something simple, though Rumi saw through your facade and saw that you were somewhat upset by her incoming absence. She just turned around and hugged you, hoping it would give you some type of comfort for your oncoming lonely days without her.

___

It had been a week since you had seen or heard from Rumi. While she was away, you had busied yourself with tending to your garden, your customers, and practicing baking pastries. You had quite a lot to do. At the moment, you were currently picking some ripe strawberries as you were planning to make some strawberry shortcake, seeing as you had never properly tried it before.

As you picked the last strawberry, you had noticed it was a mutated one. It was huge! It seemed like it was about three to four normal strawberries combined into one! It fits in the palm of your hand! While you were distracted, you failed to feel your phone vibrate in the pocket of your overalls.

You made your way inside of your small home and placed the freshly picked basket of fruits on the counter and washed your hands in the sink. After drying your hands, you took your phone out to see a text from Rumi.

From: bun<3

I’ll be coming home today. I miss you

7:24

Her text made your heart flutter. Even if it was simple, it still filled you with love and affection. Anything Rumi did was amazing in your eyes. It was quite pathetic really, but that’s what love did to people sometimes.

You decided that this would be a good time to drop by and give her some love and affection with some food included. You smiled as you imagined the happy face that would be present on Rumi’s face when she saw you. She was for sure going to be happy!

You felt yourself starting to feel giddy. This was going to be a good day!

___

You were wrong, dead wrong. Going to Rumi’s house had been a horrible decision.

You had decided that after closing up the shop, you would make your way to Rumi’s and bring her food. You wanted to show her how much you had missed her, but you mostly wanted to spend time with her. She was always around and made sure to check up on you and your shoot during her patrols. If she wasn’t in the area, she’d send one of her sidekicks in her place.

When you had gotten to Rumi’s place, she still wasn’t home, giving you time to set up a nice dinner for her before she had gotten home. You had prepared some fried rice along with stir-fried vegetables, knowing that she enjoyed a healthy balanced meal, especially after a hard mission. You smiled once again, you were excited to see her again. You just wanted to take her in your arms and love her the way you wanted to. She wasn’t aware, but you were completely and utterly in love with her.

As time went by, it became easier and easier to admit your feelings for Rumi to yourself. Before, you would blush and stutter at the thought of it, but now, you were able to say it to yourself, but sadly not to Rumi. Not yet, at least.

You heard the front door slam open before hearing a familiar pair of feet stomp inside before hearing the door slam shut. You heard Rumi stomp her way to the kitchen, her brows furrowed and her eyes filled with anger. She didn’t even spare you a glance before placing her keys on the counter and making her way into the bedroom and slamming it shut.

You sat down on the counter, hoping that she just needed time to relax before spending quality time with you. You waited, and you waited. It had already been an hour and the food had gone cold. The vegetables were cold and hard, as well as the rice. You decided to place everything in a counter before cleaning up. You knew that she was just upset and needed time for herself.

You made your way to the front door, making sure to shut all the necessary lights as it was already nearing midnight. You didn’t wanna upset her any further by overstaying your welcome. Usually, you would have asked to spend the night, but it didn’t seem like Rumi was in the mood for head pats and cuddles.

You smacked your head with your palm, already putting on your shoes but you had stupidly forgotten about your phone which you had tossed on the couch when you had first arrived. You took off your shoes once more before stepping back into the living room, knowing how disrespectful it was to walk into someone's home with shoes on, especially dirty shoes.

You made your way to the couch before picking up your phone, seeing two different texts from Rumi before she had gotten home.

From: bun <3

I’m really upset, usually, I’d love for you to visit but I just want to be alone. I hope you understand.

10:23

From: bun<3

We can go out tomorrow if you’d like? I miss you carrot

10:26

You were an idiot. An actual idiot. At that time, you were already setting the table as you had closed the shop at eight, having only two hours to cook Rumi a proper meal before her arrival. You should have just left her alone. Now she thinks that you ignored her texts and invited yourself into her home anyways.

You sighed before plopping your phone down on the cushion beside you, placing your arm over your eyes, wanting to just go home and sleep. You should probably make your way home now. It was already getting late. You sat up, making a move to get up off of the couch when Rumi’s bedroom door slammed shut. A pair of feet dragging down the hallway as she made herself known in the living room, standing barely two feet away from you.

Your jaw was left hanging. You were unsure of what to say? Would she be upset? Would she kick you out? Before you could come up with any more anxiety-inducing thoughts, Rumi had chosen to interrupt you before you had gone any further.

“Why’re you still here? I thought I made it clear that I wanted to be alone. Do you not know how to use your head?” she sassed, moving around the coffee table to walk towards the kitchen. While she was in the kitchen, you remained glued to the couch. Appalled at the words that had just exited her mouth.

“I-I” you stuttered, unable to formulate a proper response under her piercing gaze from where she stood in the kitchen.

“What? Are you just going to stutter and babble like a dumbass? I asked you if you could use your head or not. I’m not sure how clear I could have made this, but I did not want to see you today. I had a shitty mission and all I wanted to do was come home and relax. Instead, I come home to you, doing God knows what in the kitchen! Have you no boundaries? Can your pea-sized brain even comprehend boundaries?” she mocked, harsh words spouting from her mouth as if her mouth was a fountain of curses. “Fucking idiot” she mumbled under her breath.

You wanted to cry. This time, you had a good reason. You hadn’t expected Rumi to be this upset with you. You had good intentions but you didn’t mean to overstep. You had only wanted to let her know that you had missed her.

You nodded, opting to stare at your hands that were neatly folded in your lap instead of defending yourself. You probably deserved this anyways. It would be over soon, you just had to suck it up and tough it out. You did put yourself in this situation in the first place.

“Nothing to say? You’re dumber than I thought” she hissed.

“You’re going too far Rumi-san. I never intended to step over any boundaries. I was already here before you texted me because I wanted to make sure that you could easily relax when you got home. I wanted to cook for you and take care of you—“ you cried, your tears finally sliding down your cheeks “—I didn’t mean to overstep. But you insulting my intelligence and my mannerisms is too far. You’re being disrespectful and I don’t like that. Don’t take your anger out on me” you scolded, staring at her with such an intense and almost hateful gaze.

You could never hate Rumi, but the words she had spoken to you were something that you were going to remember for the rest of your life, you knew that this would haunt you forever and probably give you nightmares.

Her face faltered. Your words had finally been processed in her head. Sometimes Rumi acted before thinking. It was one of her lesser traits but you grew to love it anyway.

It was quite surprising how you were able to defend yourself without bursting into tears, probably because this was the one person whom you had never expected to blow upon you--to take their anger out on you.

“If you never liked me, then why did you lead me on? What was the whole point of this? You wasted my time, and yours as well” You spat, finally allowing your tears to cascade down your cheeks. “You are a horrible person Usagiyama Rumi.” you spat with venom before taking the rest of your things and walking past her, stopping at the door to say “Delete my number”

You understood that you had done something wrong, but the fact that she had degraded you and insulted you was just immature. You wiped the tears off of your face, upset at the fact that she thought that was okay. Had she always thought this way? Was she just playing you? Your mind was just running amok and you didn’t have anyone to calm you down.

Luckily, you had safely made it home, encountering no villains or criminals during your journey home. When you had gotten home, you had thrown yourself in bed, not even bothering to change your clothes or clean up. You cried yourself to sleep that night, your anxiety and insecurities weighing down on your shoulders.

___

It had been a few days after your encounter with Rumi. You had muted her texts and calls, not having the heart to block her and fully eliminate her from your life just yet. You sighed once more, picking the rest of the carrots and taking them back inside to wash. It was almost time to open up the store.

It had been quite a rough week, you spent most of your week crying, thus resulting in red puffy eyes. It still hurt to touch or rub them. You probably looked stupid, and it was probably noticed that you had been crying.

You chose to wear glasses today, hoping that it would hide your tired and puffy eyes, not wanting your customers to worry about your wellbeing, especially Ms. Takeshi. She was quite old and you did not need her to worry about you as if you were one of her children, of course, you thought of her as a mom but you didn’t wanna burden her with your problems.

Hopefully, today will be a better day for you and your fruits and vegetables.

___

“She’s not answering me Keigo! I’m getting nervous!” Rumi whined, feeling slightly queasy.

“She probably blocked you” he laughed, finding some amusement in his friend's pain. It was quite sadistic but this was Keigo we’re talking about. It wasn’t rare to see him finding amusement in fucked up things. It was just how he worked.

“But my texts are still going in! I keep trying to apologize but she keeps ignoring me” she whined, flopping on her back and tossing her phone away from her. They were both currently on patrol, sitting atop of a building somewhere in the city. Both of them were currently situated on top of the building a few buildings away from your shop, your little building of establishment visible.

“If you did that to me, ridiculed and degraded me, you would never hear from me again. I’m not surprised by her actions Rumi. She was a great girl and sorry to say it, but you fucked up. Real bad.” he continued, wanting his companion to realize how badly she had fucked up.

“You don’t have to tell me okay?” she grumbled, starting to feel irritation seep into her veins while her supposed friend continued to bring up her mistakes.

“Yeah, but you still gotta apologize anyways” he blew a piece of flyaway hair out of his face before continuing. “Why’d you do that anyway? Were you just leading her on or something? Cuz that’s mean” Keigo teased, adding more salt to her open wound.

“I-I was frustrated. One of the younger heroes got killed. A bunch of civilians too. I felt so fucking useless. I was useless. I didn’t save anyone. I may have kicked ass, but that’s not what being a hero is all about. Being a hero is about saving as many lives as you can. I saved nobodies. I just wanted to be alone and I told her that, but I guess she didn’t see. When I saw her at my place, I just left her for a while. I didn’t talk to her--” she sighed.

“Then I came out and she was just sitting on the couch. I don’t know what overcame me. I just lost it. What I did wasn’t right and I have to earn her forgiveness, but I’m not even sure she’ll let me. I hurt her so fucking bad Keigo” she sighed, placing her arm on her face, shielding herself from Keigo’s pitying gaze.

Keigo tsked before getting up, shaking his head in disapproval. “I got a plan for you bunny girl, don’t worry about it. Just make sure that you have something nice planned for tomorrow, and dress nice too. Just leave it to me. I’ll help ya. Believe it.”

“Naruto?”

“Shut up”

___

As you were exiting the shop, you encountered a familiar winged hero, stopping at the magnificent sight of his wings. “Hawks?” you squinted, almost thinking you were dreaming, fast asleep on top of the counter in your shop.

“Hey birdy, how are ya?” he greeted, stepping a little closer to you.

“I’m okay. I’m sorry, I’m closing the shop right now but if you want anything, I can open it back up? They won’t be as fresh as it’s already late, but I can fix them up with my quirk!” you explained, already digging for the key in your pocket.

“Nah baby I’m okay, don’t worry about me. I was just wondering if I could take you out? Maybe for coffee?” he asked, scratching the back of his neck. You blushed. What did he want with you? Was he playing with you? Was this a ploy to get you back with Rumi when you hadn’t even established a proper relationship with her?

“O-Okay, I don’t mind” you stuttered, blushing at the fact that he wanted to take you out. This still must have been a play, but this was still the Pro-Hero Hawks! This was an opportunity you couldn’t miss due to your stubborn and prideful personality!

“Come here baby bird, we’re flying” he smiled, wrapping his arms around your waist before taking off, launching the both of you into the air. You screamed as you both flew up, not used to flying.

“Um… Hawks-san... Why did you want to talk? I’ve never spoken to me before” you started, clutching his arm a little harder as he weaved the both of you through the city. “I’ll talk at the coffee shop okay? I promise.” he smiled.

You nodded, not wanting to pry any further as you didn’t want to overstep your boundaries once more.

___

“Look, Rumi misses you kid.” he started, scratching the back of his head, mussing up his already wind-swept hair. “I KNEW IT!” you cried, slamming your frappuccino that he oh so kindly bought for you on the table, startling Hawks and the few customers in the joint.

“I know she’s sorry. I’ve seen her. She’s messed up right now. I know what she did was shitty but you gotta give her another chance kid.” he nearly begged, grasping at your hands. You scowled. How dare he? What did he know?

”Is that supposed to make me pity her? She knows what she did. And, with all due respect, you shouldn't even be trying to apologize for her in the first place, Hawks-san” you seethed, letting go of his hands and balling yours into fists. You were irritated.

”Look, I know how badly she fucked up. If it was me, I wouldn't even waste my time with her. But that's me, and this is you. I know you’re in love with her baby bird. Please don't give up on her just because of one fight. All couples fight and all couples are toxic in their own ways. You just have to communicate.” he smiled.

”F-Fine! But… Please don't mention my feelings for her! That's just embarrassing!” you yelled, hiding your heating face into the palms of your hand. Hawks smiled again before getting up, beckoning for you to follow him.

Hawks was quite surprised at your willingness to accompany him to meet Rumi. he expected you to be either hesitant or just reject his proposal and leave Rumi in the dust. He smiled once more, you had strong feelings for her, that was a guarantee.

But, it was now or never.

Hawks had flown the both of you on top of this building a few ways away from your shop. Your shop was actually visible from here! As Hawks set you down, he motioned for you to turn around, you obeyed, only to see Rumi standing there, holding a bouquet of white orchids. You recognized them as the ‘I’m sorry flowers’. You scoffed. Did she think you were going to be bought by flowers?

Maybe.

You felt your cheeks heating up at the sight of Rumi. She still wore her normal clothes, but for some reason, she looks even more attractive than she did before. Of course, she was attractive but it felt as if her attractiveness doubled. Or was that just because you haven’t seen her for some time? People did say that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Rumi approached you before trying to nudge the flowers in your hands. You reluctantly took them, not wanting to rub any more salt onto her wounds. You knew that what she had done was wrong and disrespectful, but you understood that sometimes people snapped. Anger was a human emotion, though she just didn't deal with it very well.

“I’m sorry carrot. I disrespected you and called you names. I made fun of your intelligence even though you’re one of the smartest, prettiest, and most creative people I’ve had the pleasure of meeting. I know that I can’t make excuses, but I know what I can do is try my best to get you to forgive me and regain your trust” she softly spoke, staring lovingly into your eyes.

You felt tears well up in your eyes. You knew she was sorry, but you still felt hurt by her words. She may have just said it out of anger and to hurt you, but it still hurt. There was the intention with her words. You knew and felt it. You knew that you would be able to forgive her but when things like this happened, it turned you off.

Though, this case is special. You should’ve checked your phone and asked for permission to go inside her home in the first place. Your fault may not have been as serious or as severe as hers, but you weren’t going to let her shoulder all of the blame.

You placed the flowers down on the floor, resulting in you worrying Rumi in the process. Were you going to leave? Did you not accept her apology? Did you hate her? Did you never want to see her again? Were you ever going to forgive her? Rumi could feel her heartbeat pounding in her ears, anxiety bubbling up inside her. She was suddenly overcome with an urge to hurl. Before she could even gag, you had already thrown yourself in her arms, wrapping your arms around your neck whilst your legs did the same to her waist.

“I accept your apology! I’m sorry too! I didn’t mean to ignore my texts! Please take me back! I love you so much bun bun!” you sobbed, grasping her even tighter, unaware of what you had just spoken. You heard Rumi let out a laugh of disbelief.

She pulled away to gaze at your crying face, feeling herself fall even harder for the crybaby right in front of her. She smiled before slamming her lips against yours, quickly dipping her tongue inside of your mouth. Your eyes widened at the surprise kiss before you slowly melted into it, using your tongue to caress hers, pulling her in even further into you.

As you and Rumi made out, Hawks stood there. He literally just stood there. “H-Hey Rumi! I thought you said I would be eating dinner with you guys” he tried to gain their attention, even sending some of his feathers to them, trying to separate them from each other.

But, Rumi just shooed him away, leaving Hawks to sadly walk away. As Hawks flew off of the building, his one thought was ‘when will I meet my someone?’. He sighed and continued his flight home. He would meet his soulmate one day. That was for sure.

“Rumi, do you love me back?” you asked, wanting to hear it come from her mouth. She smiled, caressing the soft skin of your cheeks. “I do carrot. I really do” she smiled, leaning in for another kiss. “Why did you choose to bring me up here though? We could have just gone to your apartment” you tilted your head, resulting in Rumi’s heart skipping a beat.

“Well, I’ve actually known you for a while. There was a time where I was patrolling here and I saw you walking home, it was already late so I wanted to keep an eye out for you and make sure you were safe. I saw you reviving all the dead plants you passed by, even growing some berries on the shrubbery. I just thought you were so interesting, but I didn't want to be a stalker so I let you go. Then a few days later, I get thrown inside your shop. What a coincidence huh?” she laughed.

“You’re such a simp bun” you teased, pinching her soft chubby cheeks.

“Oh! That reminds me, I got you something!” she revealed a small box before handing it to you. It was quite heavy. You opened it, only to find out that it was a bunny! Rumi had gotten you a bunny! How ironic. You scooped it out of the box before placing the bunny in your arms, feeling your bottom lip tremble at the adorable site of the bunny.

“Do you like it?” she queried, anxious to find out.

“I love it! I’m gonna name them Hawks!”

“E-Eh? Why!? Why not after me? Hey! Wait! Don’t use your vines to escape! Answer me!”

___

“Rumi! Where do I smash this in?” you asked, wondering where the hammer was. “Baby carrot, that’s a screw, you can’t use a hammer, we need a drill,” she informed you, carefully taking the hammer out of your dangerous hands.

“Why’d I have to get such a big closet anyways” you grumbled, sitting on the ground with a pout, hating how useless you were right now. “Because you ran out of snack space. It’s okay. My dad taught me how to build stuff, also this is from IKEA so it’s easy to follow” she bragged, smirking at your sulking figure.

“Can you hand me the door? We can attach it now. Don’t worry, we’re almost done baby, I promise” she smiled, ruffling the top of your hair. You grumbled about not liking her messing your hair up before reluctantly getting up to fetch the door for your lovely girlfriend. Has this door always been so big and heavy?

You squatted and wrapped your arms around the door, grunting as you tried to pick it up. You succeeded but lost your balance, your legs locking into place as you fell backwards, the door landing on top of you and smashing into your forehead. “HELP!” you cried as you were pinned under the door.

Rumi came running in, thinking you had hammered a nail through your own foot, only to find you on the floor, under a cabinet door. She snickered as your limbs wiggled.

“I guess you can say you look… a-door-able HAHAHA!”

“Haha. Please help, my lungs are being crushed”

“OH SHIT”

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onlyfreds · 4 years

Text

Yours Forever | F.W.

Title: Yours Forever

Requested: Yes/No

Summary: It’s been a year since the war. Fred decides that he is ready for a new chapter in his life.

A/N: This is for @theweasleysredhair‘s 9k writing challenge. Prompt #9 (You should just marry me) and #15 (You remembered) and the song “Just the Way You Are” by Bruno Mars

Lyrics are in italics

Part 2

“You ready?” I asked my boyfriend, Fred, as I walked down the stairs of our flat.

My boyfriend turned to face me, “Gorgeous as always love.” He said with a small smirk.

He then picked up his jacket from the table, then he offered me his arm, “Ready to go on our date love?”

I giggled as I took it, “Always.”

After eating at the restaurant, we were sitting in a nearby park, watching the stars.

“It’s amazing isn’t it.” I suddenly said.

Fred looked at me, “What is?”

“6 years of dating and two near death experiences. And we’re still standing strong.” I contemplated. It’s been a year since the war. Fred would’ve been crushed by a wall if I hadn’t pushed him out of the way in time and I would’ve died if Fred hadn’t blocked the killing curse that a deatheater shot at me.

After receiving no reply, I looked over at Fred, his eyes were glazed, his mind was a million miles away.

“What are you thinking?” I asked softly.

He diverted his gaze back to me, before standing up and helping me do the same.

“Freddie, you’re worrying me.” I said as I placed my right hand on his cheek.

He gave me a small smile, “You think it’s amazing that we’re still standing strong after all these years?”

I gave him a confused look, “Of course I do, Freddie.”

“Then you should just marry me.” He said, as he got down on one knee.

“What?”

He pulled out a small box with a diamond ring inside, “Y/N, you are the most amazing and gorgeous person I’ve ever met. I honestly wouldn’t be here without you. I want to live my life to the fullest and I want you to be my side while I do it. You had me under your spell the minute I laid eyes on you, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. I could never imagine my life without you and I could never see my future without you in it. So, will you marry me?”

My hand flew to my mouth as tears started to cloud my vision, “Yes! Yes Fred! I will marry you!”

“I love you.” He said as he slipped the ring on my finger.

“I love you too.” I said as he leaned forward and kissed me under the stars.

6 months later

Since Ginny and Hermione helped with the wedding preparations and like Hermione, I was muggle-born, they agreed to keep some muggle traditions like the bride and groom not seeing each other until the wedding day.

As the rehearsal dinner ended, Fred was more clingy than usual.

“Do we have to be apart?” Fred whined as he hugged me from behind.

I chuckled, “It’s tradition Freddie. Besides, it’s just one night. Tomorrow, we’re getting married.”

He placed his head in the crook of my neck, “Can’t wait to finally call you Mrs. Weasley.”

But that little moment was interrupted when George yelled, “We have to go Freddie. Ginny already whacked me on the head, I don’t want to wait for Hermione to do the same.”

Fred and I laughed at his twin’s predicament.

“Just a second.” Fred yelled back before turning to me, “Can I have one last kiss.”

I gave him a confused look, “One last kiss?”

“As an unmarried couple.”

I smiled as I leaned forward and kissed him.

“I can’t wait to see you walk down the aisle.” He said.

I giggled, “And I can’t wait to see you at the end of the aisle.”

“Fred!” George yelled, “Hermione is going to whack me on the head if you don’t get your arse here in 2 minutes!”

“See you tomorrow princess!” Fred said with a small wink as he ran off to his twin.

The Big Day

I looked at myself in the mirror, admiring how perfect my dress was. It was literally my dream dress. It was sleeveless and lace is scattered along the outfit. And the veil was topped off with a small tiara.

“You look beautiful.” Hermione said as she entered the room.

“Thank you, Mione.” I said, giving her a small smile.

Ginny then dashed into the room, “Oh my gosh.” She gasped, “Fred is going to cry.”

“Are you sure you want to marry my brother?” She joked. “Because I can make the perfect distraction while you slip out the front door.”

We laughed as Hermione playfully smacked Ginny’s arm.

I shook my head, “I’m fine Ginny. I have never been more sure of anything in my life.”

“Well then,” Hermione said, “We wouldn’t want to keep your soon to be husband waiting then.”

Our wedding was taking place at the Burrow just like Bill and Fleur’s wedding.

Molly was waiting for us by the opening of the tent.

“You look so gorgeous, dear.” Molly said as she gave me a hug.

“Thank you, Molly.” I grinned.

“Molly,” I said, tentatively.

“Yes dear?”

“Thank you so much for helping out but can I ask one more favor?”

“Of course, dear, it is your wedding day.”

“Can Arthur be the one to walk me down the aisle?” I asked. To say that I didn’t get along with my parents was the understatement of the century. Since they wanted a boy, they were “disappointed” to say the least. And it only made matters worse when I attended Hogwarts. They disowned me the moment I came home for the summer after my first year. The minute the twins knew about my situation, the Weasleys took me in faster than you could say, “The Burrow”.

Tears started to well up in Molly’s eyes, “Of course dear.”

She then called Arthur as the ceremony started.

“Thank you.” Arthur said as he took his place beside me, “for making my son so happy.”

I smiled, “If there’s anyone I should be thanking Arthur, it’s you and Molly. Thank you for raising the son who would complete me and make me happy.”

Molly was trying to hold back tears as she hugged me tightly, “My baby boy is all grown up now and I’m glad that he found someone so perfect.”

“Molly.” I said with a small smile, “Stop, you’re going to make me cry.”

The three of us chuckled as Molly handed me the bouquet.

I started to walk down the aisle.

Ginny was right, Fred had to turn around to hide his tears.

When we arrived at the altar Fred smiled as he said, “Hey gorgeous, is that the earrings you wore when we had our first kiss.”

I grinned, “You remembered.”

He chuckled, “Of course I do. I remember every memory we have.”

The ceremony then started.

Then it was time for the vows. I went first.

“Fred Weasley. My best friend, my partner in crime, my everything, my lover, and in just a few minutes time: The man I’ll spend the rest of forever with. I didn’t know what made me fell in love with him in the first place. Was it his dazzling eyes? Or his charming smile? It could even be his overall personality.” I stated, making everyone chuckled.

“I always thought that love means going through immense pain or having your heart broken into millions of pieces or just full of regrets, basically. But Fred proved me wrong. He never made me go through pain, he never broke my heart, and I never have a single regret when it came to loving him.” I continued, making my fiancé smile.

“He always manages to make me smile. As cliché as it sounds, he is the ray of sunshine that shines through my darkest days. He has given me so much love and care over the years and I promise that I’ll always give you the more than what you deserve. I promise that I’ll always prank with you. I promise that I’ll always be by your side no matter what.” I said as I slipped the ring onto his finger.

“Your sister asked me if I was sure about my decision to marry you.” The group laughed as Ginny gave us a guilty smile. I turned back to Fred, not trying to hold back the tears anymore, “I told her that, I’ve never been more sure of anything in my life. If I lived a thousand lives, then I would choose you a thousand times. Loving you isn’t just a feeling, it’s an adventure. An adventure I’ll take with you even in the afterlife.”

At this point, it was obvious that Fred was trying to hold back tears but he still had his vows to say.

“Y/N L/N, how do I begin to describe her? The most amazing, the most gorgeous, the hottest girl I’ve ever laid eyes on. The moment I saw you, I knew that you were the one I was going to marry. I knew that you were the one I was going to start a family with. I knew that you were the one I was going to spend the rest of my life with. I found, and still find, every part of you attractive. From the sparkle of mischief in your eyes to your wonderful laugh. Even the way how you could wear a bucket of red paint and yell at me for hitting the wrong target.” I blushed as he tucked a stray piece of hair behind my ear.

“Honestly, I would be lost without you. You are the part of my life that I can never live without. You have always been by my side. Through the ups and downs, the laughs and the frowns, the good ideas and the bad ones, the successful pranks and the less successful ones. You supported the joke shop the minute we pitched the idea to you. You’ve stayed with me through those late nights of brainstorming. And you willingly dropped out of school to open up the joke shop with us.” Molly gave a playful glare to Fred, causing everyone to was present to laugh.

“I would’ve died if you hadn’t saved me. I wouldn’t be standing here today, marrying the woman I love. Merlin, I don’t even know how I got you date me in the first place, let alone marry me. But I thank my lucky stars that I got you to say ‘yes’. I am the luckiest man in the world, because I can call you mine. I promise that I’ll always be with you, even in the afterlife. You complete me.” He said as he placed the ring on my finger, “Nothing else can complete me but you.” He finished, openly crying.

“With the power invested in me. I now pronounce you, husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride.” The minister smiled.

Fred pulled me into his arms and kissed me passionately, finally sealing the deal.

Later at the Reception

The party was in full swing. It actually reminded me of the parties we would have at the Gryffindor common room. So, it meant that we still knew how to throw a party. We already threw the bouquet and the garter, Hermione and Ron catching them respectively.

Then came our first dance as husband and wife. But, like always, Fred had something up his sleeve.

I gave my husband a confused look when George announced that he had a “little surprise”.

Music started to play as Fred winked and said, “You’ll see.”

To everyone’s surprise, he started to sing.

Oh, her eyes, her eyes Make the stars look like they're not shinin' Her hair, her hair Falls perfectly without her tryin' She's so beautiful and I tell her everyday

Yeah, I know, I know When I compliment her, she won't believe me And it's so, it's so Sad to think that she don't see what I see But every time she asks me, "Do I look okay?" I say

He then took my hand and spun me around as he continued,

When I see your face There's not a thing that I would change 'Cause you're amazing Just the way you are And when you smile The whole world stops and stares for a while 'Cause girl, you're amazing Just the way you are Yeah

He traced my bottom lip with his thumb as I giggled.

Her lips, her lips I could kiss them all day if she'd let me Her laugh, her laugh She hates, but I think it's so sexy She's so beautiful and I tell her everyday Oh, you know, you know You know I'd never ask you to change

He placed a small peck on my lips before continuing.

If perfect's what you're searchin' for, then just stay the same So don't even bother askin' if you look okay You know I'll say

I placed my hands on his shoulders as he swayed me on the spot.

The way you are The way you are Girl, you're amazing Just the way you are

“Since when did you learn to sing?” I asked.

He smirked, “Only for you. Love.”

Bonus:

Soon enough, the reception was soon over. We were trying to help Molly clean up.

She waved us off, “We can handle this. Just go.”

Fred smirked, “Time to go to our own reception then.”

After bidding goodbye to his family, we apparated to the hotel we were staying in before going to our honeymoon.

I yelped as Fred scooped me up bridal style and carried me to our room.

“Mrs. Weasley, I guarantee you’re going to have the best night of your life.”

#fredweasleyimagines #fredweasleyfanfic #fred weasley fluff #twrh9kwritingchallenge #wedding #fred weasley smut #fred weasley angst #married #hp imagine #fredweasleyoneshots #hp imagines #hp one shot #fred weasly x reader #theweasley'sredhair

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1dsource · 4 years

Photo

Author Spotlight: soldouthaz

Don’t forget to show the author to leave kudos and comments to show the author love!

like it’s a game

Words: 32k

there is little harry hates more than truth or dare.

and louis.

let me carry your weight

Words: 28k

louis is fresh out of a bad relationship with someone who made him feel awful about how he looked. on his journey to better himself, he meets harry - the ridiculously attractive and fit personal trainer.

make this feel like home

Words: 43k

The house on West 28th Street in London is twice the size of Louis', more expensive than the price of all of his house and car payments combined, and is falling apart at the seams.

give me love

Words: 41k

Despite being an omega, Louis’ always had a blatant dislike of alphas.

Or, Louis doesn't feel like a good omega, Harry doesn't remember how to be an alpha, and they figure it out together.

tall stories on the page

Words: 5.7k

harry's tired of being interviewed by people that only care about the same pointless gossip.

louis is a nice change of pace.

Part 1 of drabbles

makeup drawer

Words: 4.1k

harry’s excited and nervous about wearing makeup for the first time publicly. louis is his supportive makeup artist.

Part 2 of drabbles

golden slumbers fill your eyes

Words: 5k

“I just want to sleep,” he croaks, hands twisted in the front of Louis’ shirt, “S’all I want, Lou, I just want to be able to sleep.”

“I know,” he says, stroking Harry’s hair and shushing him.

And he’s still worn out, mind heavy from the turmoil of his failure, but Louis never fails to make him feel better. He rests his forehead against his and exhales, finally letting his eyes fall shut.

harry has insomnia and louis helps him through the ups and downs.

Part 3 of drabbles

you’re safe like springtime

Words: 4.5k

And it's bad enough that he's trapped in the library during a storm, but it's infinitely worse that he's stuck in the library during a storm with his teammate and sworn enemy - Harry Styles.

Part 4 of drabbles

living for your every move

Words: 2.8k

Being around Harry is always exciting. Louis swears he’s always discovering new things that he’s never felt before when he’s around him. He gets a shiver down his spine when Harry puts his hand on his lower back, an unexplainable warmness when he presses a deep kiss to the skin of Louis’ cheek. His heart feels like it beats ten times faster and he sometimes wonders if Harry can feel it when it does, when his words slow and his throat drops into his stomach because he simply doesn’t know what to do with the onslaught of sudden desire.

Already from just thinking about him alone Louis can feel his skin heat up again, the familiar tremble in his movement. His brain feels hazy around the edges when he closes his eyes and tries to picture how Harry looked only moments ago when he’d kissed Louis goodbye out front of his flat.

His lips had been soft just like they always are, thin but thorough as they met Louis’. A swipe of his tongue and a hand on the back of his head, another at his waist, the taste of the sweet wine from dinner still heavy on their taste buds.

But it always stops there.

Part 5 of drabbles

your biggest fan

Words: 9k

Just like everyone else, Louis has a few habits that he can’t seem to break. Guilty pleasures, rather. His nails are perpetually short because he can’t quit biting them, the bottom of his shoes scuffed from tapping his foot constantly. Sometimes his leg gets a cramp from bouncing it so often underneath his desk. That isn't too bad, he reckons, just some average teenage coping mechanisms.

And also, occasionally, minor instances of theft.

Part 6 of drabbles

baby blue

Words: 39k

Harry Styles takes his time coming out to greet them. Louis only knows what he’s seen on file and what he’s heard them talking about, but he fully lives up to the image he had inside of his head.

He saunters down the front steps of the farmhouse in his Levi’s, brown snakeskin boots curving out from underneath the denim Louis’ sure he had specially made. He’s got on a plaid button-down tucked into the jeans because of course he does, curls spilling out from either side of his cowboy hat around his sunglasses and country-tan skin.

“Harry Styles,” he drawls, extending a hand to Louis’ manager, “Pleased to meet ya’ll.”

nothing worsens, nothing grows

Words: 102k

and he sits there quietly with harry’s headphones in his ears while his eyes begin to close, totally unaware that he’s listening to the soundtrack of harry falling in love with him.

or, another roadtrip au featuring harry as the misunderstood hipster, louis as the bitter psych major, liam as the one with the secret boyfriend, and niall as the one who just wants everyone to be happy.

what’s mine is yours to make your own

Words: 39k

sometimes, the closest harry ever feels to home is louis. it's their shared hotel rooms on tour, their shoes toed off in the doorway next to each other, jackets hung on the same post.

it's everything he doesn't notice until it's been taken away from him.

Part 1 of look after you

forgive the urgency, but hurry up and wait

Words: 53k

Louis' going to do better. He’s going to have all of the uncomfortable conversations and the relationship talks. He’s going to make himself be a good boyfriend.

And he’s got absolutely no idea where to start.

Part 2 of look after you

call if you need me

Words: 10k

If anyone asks later on, Louis plans to tell them that it’s all Niall’s fault.

you know what they say

Words: 10k

nice guys always finish last.

until this blood runs cold

Words: 13k

In a town as small as Louis’, everybody knows everybody and gossip spreads faster than the wildfires that rage on just outside their backdoors in the sweltering heat of summer. When something happens here everyone knows about it within seconds. Neighbors call neighbors and notes are left on doorsteps, old telephone lines ringing until there isn’t a single person who is left in the unknown.

So it’s definitely hot gossip when a vampire moves in across the street from him, the very same one who’s just become Louis’ boss.

the way this river runs

Words: 27k

It’d be so easy to just open his mouth and plead with Harry, to scream I’m sorry until his voice disappears, but he can’t. Be it his pride or his ego or his insecurities, he just can’t do it. The worst part is that he knows Harry would probably forgive him.

But Louis doesn’t want phony forgiveness. He doesn’t want Harry’s soothing words and pity embrace, thinks he might just break altogether if he was offered them. He feels like he’s made of glass recently and it’s to the point where he kind of wants to tip over the edge, just to see if he’d shatter. Just to see who’d be there to pick up the pieces if he did.

Louis is provided a chance to start over. He takes it.

sky’d be falling and i’d hold you tight

Words: 6.3k

it's too much to handle at once but louis needs it this way - needs harry to tether him back to the earth before he floats away from it completely.

or before there is no more earth left at all.

an au based on the song by jp saxe and julia michaels

Part 1 of song fics

#faaw #author spotlight #soldouthaz #fic rec #hljournal #hlcreators #larry fanfiction

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sombreboy · 4 years

Text

Mused obsession (4)

Written by @sombreboy as Jungkook & @chimoona as Jimin Banner by @carly-bean-blog

[ masterlist ]

⇢Explicit (18+) ⇢Pairing: Jungkook & Jimin ⇢Genre: yandere, smut, mxm ⇢Word count: 9k ⇢Ch.warnings: profanity, jealous jk, tattooing, light descriptions of blood/pain, exhibitionist jk oh boy, graphic desc. of piercing jk's cock (I'm no piercer so don't take this literally it's fiction, infections don't exist in this world pls be sanitary.), more intense sexual tension because why not, jk is a total sadomasochist and this you need to remember forever for every damn chapter. xo

Industry famous Jeon Jungkook of GJK photography takes an interest in a model and up-and-coming fashion designer, Park Jimin. After an opportunity to study the man behind his trusty lens, he thinks he may have just found his new muse.

The next morning Jungkook’s alarm went off early, and he groaned out curses. For once, he didn’t want to wake up. The quality of sleep he’d gotten was a rarity in his life, all thanks to the man laying next to him. Jungkook turns the alarm off before clinging to Jimin, pressing soft kisses on the crook of his neck, wishing he could stay in bed forever.

It isn’t the alarm that rouses Jimin but the motion of Jungkook behind him. Gentle kisses tickle his neck and strong arms hold him close—a kind comforting touch he hasn’t felt since his ex. He turns to face the man, pressing his parted mouth to his, still groggy with sleep. “Good morning,” he coos, brushing his plump lips down Jungkook’s flushed neck before resting in the indent of his collar. He slept well enough, but the unfamiliar setting caused him to wake a couple times throughout the night. Even then, Jungkook’s warmth and protective hold coaxed him back to sleep. “What day is it?” He wonders out loud, not ready to sit up and check for himself. The mixture of liquor from the night before doesn’t help his focus in the slightest, feeling slightly hungover and lethargic. “Have you seen my phone?” He dreads the many messages he probably has from his manager, or even Tae.

Jungkook hums, ignoring every single question being thrown at him. He just wants to hold Jimin forever. But eventually, he reaches over to the nightstand where he’s placed the elder’s phone and hands it over, then cuddles up close to get a look at the screen as well. He’s extremely curious after all—does anybody miss Jimin? How easy would it possibly be to just...keep him?

No, that’s too early. Things take time.

“I don’t know, but there’s breakfast ready whenever you’re hungry...” Jungkook murmurs with a raspy morning voice.

“Mm, sounds good…” Just as Jimin suspected, ten messages and four phone calls. Most are from his manager, a couple from Taehyung apologizing, and one from… interesting. Jimin flicks off the covers from his side of the bed and wriggles out of Jungkook’s arms, regrettably. “Breakfast sounds great,” he picks his robe from the floor and wraps it around himself in a hurry, “I just need to make a few phone calls.” He leans onto the bed and gives the younger a quick peck on the cheek. “I’ll make it quick, promise.”

Before Jungkook has a chance to reply, Jimin steps out onto the attached balcony and closes the door behind him. First thing’s first, he definitely needs to let his manager know he’s not dead in a ditch. However, more importantly, he’s dying to know why his ex messaged him out of the blue after so many months of silence. He’s a vague man. The only thing his text said was “Proud.”

Jungkook’s lip twitches as he watches the blonde close the balcony door in a hurry. What is so important? He would be lying if he said he didn’t feel a bit curious...and frustrated. He doesn’t like secrets, even if Jimin doesn’t owe him anything... technically . Jungkook wants to know, and he will, eventually. The photographer lays low, gets out of bed to puts on a pair of sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt. He grabs his own phone and sits back down, scrolling through social media... Jimin’s show was a hit, trending, both photos and praise, on the news. Of course, there were the photos of Jungkook, smiling as he was enjoying the show—which also drew a whole lot more attention towards the blonde, as if making Jeon Jungkook smile was an achievement. Jungkook scoffs, but nonetheless happy about the many pictures available of Jimin, saving several to his phone as he continuously glances over at the balcony.

Who is he calling… Kook cranes his neck to try and decipher Jimin’s facial expressions, but can’t quite make it out...

“Yes, yes, I’m fine. No, Jeon didn’t kidnap me and hide me in his basement. No—GOD, what kind of man do you think I am? Yeah…yeah…okay, thanks for covering. It went really well? Trending? Goood…okay, yeah, thanks for calling. Sorry to worry you…bye.” Jimin checks in with his manager. They’re annoying as hell but they mean well. He shoots Tae a quick text, telling him to sleep it off. Then Jimin flicks through his contact list until his thumb hovers over the one name he didn’t think he’d ever call again—Seung-Ho. The man started as a lifestyle influencer, wearing Lululemon shorts at Machu Picchu or casually eating the latest novelty hipster food with a bright smile on his face. Now he’s the brand ambassador and face of Jimin’s biggest competitor.

“Jimin, baby…,” he coos over the receiver. “I’m so proud…”

Inside, Jungkook grows restless, bouncing his leg with clasped hands as he stares at Jimin through the glass door. Who is he talking to? Why is it taking so damn long? Why did he hover over the screen for several seconds before pressing the call button? He didn’t want to wait any longer—who is more important than Jungkook? Normally, the younger is extremely patient in every other aspect of his life, but when it comes to Jimin giving somebody else his attention, it runs out quick. He gets up to saunter over to the balcony door, carefully sliding it open to eavesdrop.

“Seung-ie—“ Jimin catches himself, “Seung-Ho.” He rolls his face in his palm. It’s too early in the morning to have this conversation with the ghost of his past. Regardless, he’s very curious to know why he reached out after all this time. “Why did you text me? To say you’re proud?” He can’t help but smile a little when the man on the other line praises his clothing collection. Apparently Seung was in the audience the whole time, absolutely loved Jimin’s little speech, and even took note of how well the model looked on stage under all the glowing lights. He laughs, recalling the last time he took Jimin out on a date—how he spilled slushie all over his pure white button up and they had to make an emergency stop at Neiman Marcus for a spare.

“I miss you, Mochi,” he says lowly from the other side, deep and seductive. “When can I see you again?”

Seung-ie?… Seung-Ho. Why does the name sound familiar? Jungkook rolls his tongue against the fleshy inside of his cheek, listening for merely a minute before he decides it’s enough. He announces his presence by snaking his arms around Jimin’s waist, placing his chin in the crook of the elders neck, placing soft kisses against it.

Mine…

Kook leans in to whisper into Jimin’s ear, “I’m hungry…”

It distracts Jimin’s train of thought to have Jungkook kissing his sensitive neck. One ounce of attention from the man and he is absolute putty.

“Who was that?” Jimin hears Seung-Ho chime from the other end.

“I’ve got to go, but thank you for coming to the show,” Jimin replies, wrapping up the call. He presses the end button and turns in Jungkook’s arms to face him. He looks annoyed to say the least, but he doesn’t blame him, he would be too. “Just a stupid ex,” Jimin whispers before melding his lips to the other man’s. “Let’s eat…”

Jungkook grasps and guides Jimin’s chin between his long, tattooed fingers to face him. “Why’d they call you?” He’s no longer subtle with his concern, the mere mention of an ex causes his eyebrows to furrow. “They bothering you?” He continues, his fingers tightening ever slightly around the blondes chin, his face so close that their lips graze together with every word spoken. His other hand remains wrapped around Jimin’s waist, keeping their bodies tightly pressed together, as if the elder would disappear if he didn’t hold him.

Jimin rolls his eyes and tries to shake off the goosebumps still prickling from Seung-Ho’s compliments. “He’s probably bored,” he covers, still not entirely sure why the man reached out. He said he was proud, but why should Jimin care what he thinks? As Jungkook’s hold tightens, Jimin feels the need to be honest, as if the truth is being squeezed from him. “He liked the show. Wants to see me again, but...,” he squeezes Jungkook back, “I’m far too busy.”

“Too bad for him.” Jungkook mutters, a small smile tugging at his lips as he feels Jimin’s reassuring squeeze. He feels his stomach rumble, looping his fingers between Jimin’s as he pulls the elder with him inside towards the dining hall. If the blonde isn’t already constantly reminded by the wealth the young photographer possesses, this would be one of many reminders. A large table filled with all kinds of breakfast delicacies greet them, way too much for one, two or even three people. This might as well be a buffet for a party. “I didn’t know what you’d like, so...I got everything.” Kook shrugs, as if this isn’t his everyday life anyway, zeroing his eyes in on the fridge filled with his favorite beverage.

Jimin never has to leave. Every little thing that could possibly accommodate his needs is right here in the photographer’s house. “There’s so much to choose from...” Jimin’s hunger increases the longer he looks. He doesn’t even feed himself most of what’s available, but he almost feels like he’s on vacation, so he grabs a pastry and quickly devours it before the guilt sinks in. The flakey, sugary taste is sweeter than sweet as it hits his lips. “Here…” he lifts the danish to Jungkook’s mouth and coaxes him to take a bite without a second thought. The instinctual domestic nature is less and less jarring the longer he stays.

Jungkook’s eyes widen a tad bit in surprise at the sudden gesture, but quickly grasps Jimin’s wrist to guide the pastry to his mouth, chomping off a large piece. His eyes flutter shut with a quiet hum in content—his adoration for sweets so strong that one would wonder how the hell he has the physique he does. “You’re a man of taste,” he chuckles, bringing the straw of his drink to his lips to wash the pastry down. He could definitely get used to having Jimin here, seeing the elders' reactions to his everyday life, so adorable. Having somebody here is a nice change. Sharing this with him is all Jungkook starts to crave. “Try the fruit. Get me some grapes.”

The grapes grabbed Jimin’s attention right away—so ripe and juicy. He lifts a vine from the table and plucks off a single grape, popping it into his mouth and biting down with a satisfying crunch. A light moan tickles his throat, unable to contain how much he enjoys every bit of this. “Want one?” He plucks another grape and grasps it between his teeth, bringing it up to Jungkook’s lips to feed him directly.

With a smile, Jungkook leans in to bite the exposed half of the grape and within the same movement, grasps Jimin’s waist to push their hips together. “Want you ,” he shamelessly admits, digging his long fingers into the blonde’s sides, tipping his head forward to press a soft kiss on his plush lips. Jimin is already acting more and more in the manners that Jungkook wants; so sweet and almost domestic, like they’re actually together. He really likes it...and in his own mind, they might as well be. He has no eyes for anybody else since he saw the blonde step into his photo session.

Jimin’s hold tightens, digging to be grounded in reality while his mind floats somewhere else. He doesn’t know what’s come over him, feeling so clingy and lustful since the second Jungkook called him “baby.” “N-need you,” he says quietly. His eyes fall away from the other man as his cheeks flush with embarrassment. He isn’t sure what exactly he needs, but every little facet of his time with the photographer is so overwhelmingly euphoric he can’t imagine being apart.

One of Jungkook’s hands moves up the elders body until he reaches his neck, carefully sliding down the robe on one side to expose his small shoulder. “Yeah?” He nuzzles his nose into Jimin’s neck. Fuck, he smells so nice... A deep inhale follows, unable to resist the urge to brush his lips against Jimin’s soft skin. This man is the human embodiment of a drug.

“Yeah,” Jimin replies, weak in the knees. He pushes his robe down further for Jungkook to feel and breathe in any part he desires. He does the same to the other man, tugging the robe loose until it hangs slack around his back. He kisses his way up his built arm, paying close attention to the tattoos that decorate his skin. “Didn’t expect you to have so many,” Jimin notes with lips pressed lightly to a dark tattoo engraved in his shoulder. “I’ve always wanted more. Love the way they look.”

“Want a tattoo?” Jungkook muses. The mere thought clashes in his mind. Jimin’s skin is precious , not just any tattoo would be good enough. He sighs at the sensation of the elders lips and knows exactly who he’d choose to fulfill his wishes, if he wanted. There’s nobody he’d ever trust more than his personal tattoo artist, Kim Namjoon. He’d lie if he said he wasn’t anticipating the sounds the blonde would make as soon as the needles graze his tender skin... “What would you get?”

Jimin lifts the hem of his robe, exposing his naked thigh. “It would need to be special. Maybe something small. I’m thinking here...” he motions to the taut muscle, pure and unmarked. Jimin surveys Jungkook’s expression as he rubs a thumb over the flesh, “Wouldn’t it look pretty here, Jeon?” Clearly the younger appreciates body markings. It’s only fair his input is taken into consideration. He is, after all, the one who unknowingly influenced Jimin to finally do it.

Jungkook crouches down in front of him, allowing his slender, inked fingers to smooth down Jimin’s thigh until he reaches the part that’s meant for the tattoo. He takes a short moment to just admire the firm, untouched skin before gazing up at the blonde. “It would look gorgeous...I have the perfect person for the job. Maybe after today’s fitting?” He tilts his head in question, wondering if the model would truly be up for it. If Jimin mentions he wants something, Jungkook can’t get it out of his mind until he has it. Was it a small comment in the heat of the moment?

For Jimin, it’s so easy to just say yes when Jungkook asks a question. His wide bambi eyes sparkle with intrigue, and who is Jimin to strip that joy from him?

“Yes,” he answers, a little hesitant. He was just playing around to get a rise out of the younger man, but the idea of getting permanently marked while Jungkook watches is even more exhilarating. “But after the fitting. I need to be in top shape if I’m going to get down on my knees and measure you properly.”

Jungkook’s expression lights up—a yes is definitely what he wanted to hear. He knows he’ll have to set the plan in motion, because Jimin wants it.

“That I agree with,” Jungkook coyly replies with a crooked eyebrow. The playful spark in his eyes doesn’t go unnoticed as he leans in to kiss the blonde’s thigh. He plants a soft peck before standing up to cup Jimin’s cheeks. “Have you eaten enough? We should get ready.”

Jimin quickly devours another danish before his body tells him not to, living just a little longer in the fantasy world Jungkook created. It really is too good here, and with the other man adoring every facet of his being, it’s very hard to leave. Leaving Jungkook to finish his breakfast, Jimin finds his way to the nearest shower and instantly gravitates to the shampoo Jungkook lathered him with the night before. It’s a comforting smell that is now regrettably faint on his skin from a deep sleep. He hurries to coat himself in it, head to toe, blissing in the cloud of humidified scent blooming under the warm cascade of heat. After a short while, he steps out, feeling like a new man, ready to give Jungkook the suit of his dreams and repay him for everything.

Jungkook doesn’t bother with a shower, but simply gets dressed and waits. He runs his hand through his messy locks. The ruffled look adds to his childish yet not so innocent charm, juxtaposed against his black dress shirt that fits his firm physique, paired with black jeans. It’s a casual look, yet his adorning jewelry showcases that he is anything but ordinary, with many shiny rings and an expensive necklace that rests at the base of his neck. While waiting for Jimin, Jungkook lays down on his couch and contacts Namjoon to make sure he’s available and ready after the fitting. He’s giddy to surprise Jimin with the news... later .

All the while, Jimin wrapped back into his robe and padded down to Jungkook’s studio in hopes of retrieving his clothes, however, he found them neatly folded on a decorative console table just outside. The studio door was shut and locked tight, which he found slightly odd for a mere photography studio. Regardless, he was sure Jungkook had his reasons. He changed into his clothes from the night before and finessed his hair into a presentable style with a bit of product he found laying around. It’s not best practice in the world of fashion to be seen in public wearing the same thing twice, but he made an exception for the day.

Eventually, Jungkook grew bored and decided to go find the blonde roaming around his house, only to find all ready in yesterday's outfit. Cute.

“Ready to go? Car’s waiting outside for us.” He reaches out with grabby hands for Jimin, waiting for him to get the hint; to run to him. The younger wishes for the domestic feeling to never go away, and he was curious how the blonde would act among other people.

Luckily for Jungkook, Jimin got the hint right away and walked towards him quickly, still taking the time to admire his fit as he approached. Today is going to be difficult— how can he build upon perfection? It’s hard not to implode by how cute Jungkook is, looking the way he does, so effortless and cool; truly a muse fit for the occasion. “Ready,” Jimin nods, smiling widely and snuggling into Jungkook’s arms to enjoy a few last moments in this fantasyland before transitioning back to Park Jimin, the supermodel and fashion aficionado.

Jungkook cups the blonde’s cheek and guides his face to look up at him—a last close up look before their one-on-one dynamic would be broken, momentarily. His butterfly truly has a duality to him that is admirable, however the way the elder can easily crumble for him is incredible.

“Okay, let’s go.” He flashes his signature toothy smile and turns to guide them to the waiting car. His arm tightly grips Jimin’s waist until he has to let go to hold the door open for him.

Preparations were made on Jimin’s part during the ride. It seems his assistant is used to last-minute bookings since he started his Be Your Light collection. Last-minute tailorings for industry events and spontaneous all-nighters when inspiration struck. For this occasion, he requested that all the materials be ready for him to use alone—No assistants. The attention would be purely put on Jungkook. Just like the photographer’s preferred work style, Jimin wanted no distractions.

It was go-time the second they arrived—Jimin’s assistant guided the two men into a secluded wing of his studio where a myriad of patterns, leathers and fabrics were laid out.

“This is perfect, thank you,” Jimin nods his approval and flashes a sparkling smile, then begins to pull together his measuring tools. “Jeon, please, take a look around and tell me if anything catches your eye.”

Jungkook begins to stroll around the different materials to work with, fingers smoothing over the fabrics tentatively. His eyes keep looking back and forth between the black silk and leather. He always tended to like darker, edgier themes, but the soft and shiny material is so comfortable to touch. Jungkook grasps it in his hand and holds it up for Jimin to see with a lopsided and challenging smirk on his lips.

“Could you make me something with this?”

“There’s a lot I can do with that.”

Jimin strolls up to feel the smooth silk beneath his fingertips. Leather would have been a fine choice for its stability and durability, but he likes a challenge. “Black silk,” he notes, plucking the swatch from Jungkook’s hands to inspect it further, “it can be very complimentary to your skin tone.” He rubs his thumb over the rise and fall of the fabric’s exterior—a faint textured brocade, so unique and fitting for the man—dark, yet subdued. “If I tailor it just right, it can hold your shape or flow loose, if you choose.” His designer mind flicks on and he plots the form internally. “What kind of event do you plan to attend in a silk suit, Jeon?”

“I don’t know yet,” Jungkook shrugs, a smile mixed between sheepish and coy replacing his challenging smirk. His eyes follow Jimin’s delicate fingers as they smoothe over the fabrics, already wishing they were on him instead. Growing impatient, he jumps a bit in his position. “I want the silk, make it fitted…” He muses for a moment. “And a low front?”

“A low front, huh?” Jimin glides a hand down the front of Jungkook’s shirt and tugs a little to reveal his defined collarbones. “A very wise choice,” he smirks, releasing the shirt with a snap, “take this off, I’ll need to get close to your body for the tightest fit.” He takes a couple steps back to give Jungkook space, itching to rid the shirt and everything else. However, this is a big opportunity to make something neoteric and special. The process will be the greatest test of his patience.

“Everything?” Jungkook coyly replies as he pulls his shirt over his head, shamelessly exposing his upper body to Jimin. He kind of likes this side of Jimin. No, scrap that–he really likes it. The photographer is rarely ever told what to do, and the elders' confidence and passion for his work is just adding to the younger's growing infatuation.

Jimin bites his lip at the question. “Eager, aren’t we?” His fingers fall to Jungkook’s waist, gliding across his exposed hips and down to his belt buckle. “No, Jeon, just the shirt for now.” He gives the buckle a light tap and then steps behind the photographer, releasing a soft sigh at the smooth expanse of flesh he’s blessed to dress any way he likes. “We’ll start with the top and work our way down. Now stay nice and relaxed, I want to make sure the measurements are precise.”

Jungkook’s coy pout matches the mischief in his eyes as he glances over his shoulder at the blonde. “Yes, Mr. Park.” He turns his head back to look straight forward, letting his arms dangle loosely on his sides. “Take your time with me.” Jungkook really dragged out the way he said the elders last name, as if they weren’t already past the point of formalities.

Jimin takes his time to touch and measure Jungkook’s torso until he has every inch of muscle definition saved to memory. The younger’s enthusiasm encourages him to work with full concentration as he daydreams about the low neckline and how he’ll form it. However, he’s easily snapped from his thoughts whenever he is referred to as “Mr. Park,” like he’s never been called the name before. When it rolls off of Jungkook’s tongue, it’s no longer a name given at birth but a name given to tease. He drapes the measuring tape around the back of his neck and pauses, taking one last second to admire all of Jungkook’s tattoos, fully exposed just for him. What a predicament he’s gotten himself into. He doesn’t want to rush the process, but once the pants come off, he may need to pick up the pace.

“Now the pants, Jeon,” Jimin instructs with the firmest tone he can muster, “take them off for me.”

Jungkook cocks a playful eyebrow at the elder male, letting his hands work his belt to slowly unbuckle it. “You’re so cute when you’re bossy.” He unzips and peels his pants down, letting them fall and pool by his feet before stepping out of them, standing in nothing but his boxers. It’s new, being the one to follow orders. But, the way Jimin tries so hard to remain professional is the best part. So the photographer plays along, curious as to how long the blonde can hold his mask before it crumbles.

Jimin continues to act like he doesn’t want to take advantage of Jungkook’s vulnerable state, which is even harder than it looks.

“I’m always cute,” he responds just a little too late and winks at the younger man. He doesn’t know what he’s saying at this point. His brain switches to autopilot once Jungkook’s thick thighs become visible. All he can think to do is take a deep breath, bend to his knees and measure. Measure, measure. He jots down his findings on a small notepad to keep his hands busy. The process is almost complete—just one more measurement and Jungkook can get dressed. Jimin places his palms on Jungkook’s inner thigh to hold the measuring tape in place for the inseam. “Hold still,” he asks quietly, feeling small and meek under the younger man’s gaze, “I’m almost done.” His hand soothes over the expanse of his exposed flesh, lingering a little longer than professionally advised.

Jungkook firmly places his hands on his hips as he gazes down at the blonde from above. His potent stare along with the confidence practically oozing off of him is sure to make just about anybody nervous. However, it is Jimin that he wants to bring to his knees, and conveniently enough, he already is. Before Jimin could properly measure his inner thigh, Jungkook playfully reaches his hand down to brush the blonde locks away from Jimin’s face, then runs his long fingers through it, giving a light tug before withdrawing.

“Done?”

Jimin shudders from the tug at his roots, causing his muscles to tense from the pleasure and proximity of the man above. He can’t resist the effect Jungkook’s beautiful hands have on him, especially when they’re carded through his soft hair, caressing him any way they please. “Almost done,” he says in a low tone, aching to deflect attention from the growing tent in his pants. “But if you keep distracting me, we’ll be here all day.” He glides his hand higher up the younger man’s inner thigh until it touches the hemline of his briefs. “Would you like that, Jeon?”

“Is that a question or a proposition?” Jungkook’s light smirk doesn’t go unnoticed. His hand doesn’t leave the blonde’s curls as he twirls the light ends between his fingers. God, did he love to tease the model, who’s eyes seem to dilate with lust as they gaze up at him with innocence. But Jungkook knows by now that he is far from the angel he initially presented himself as.

Jimin replies with a smirk of his own, dragging his small fingertips down the younger’s inner thigh to take the last measurement. He purposefully brushes the back of his hand against the bulge in Jungkook’s briefs and teases him through the fabric for just a second, then withdraws completely as if nothing happened. “I’ll pass my notes to my assistant so she can begin the preliminary steps—shouldn’t take long.” He stands to his feet and steps so close to Jungkook that their bodies nearly touch. “You did great, Jeon. You can get dressed now.”

Jungkook scrunches his nose in a small, toothy smile. The blonde really tried to play him at his own game. Well, if that’s what he wants... He nods lightly before turning around to bend over and pick his clothes up, slowly putting the fabrics on one by one without a word. Maybe Jimin expected a different reaction, but Jungkook wanted the blonde pining rather than simply giving him what he wanted. As he is fully dressed, he turns back to face Jimin and reaches out to caress his cheek with the back of his hand. “I'm thrilled to see what you come up with… Now, are we done for today?”

“That’s a wrap,” Jimin nods, internally cursing himself for encouraging Jungkook to dress so quickly. Regardless, it wouldn’t hurt to show some affection now that the measurements are recorded. He melts into Jungkook’s caress and curls his arm around the small of his waist to guide him to the door. He peeks up at the taller man beneath his blonde fringe, feeling more relaxed now that he doesn’t have to focus on drafting the suit.

“So, about this tattoo...”

Jungkook’s face lights up at the mention. “Yes! Do you wanna go now?” He is a tad bit over excited about the fact, as he’s made sure that Namjoon was ready to clear his schedule the very second he made the call. Kook wraps his arm around Jimin’s shoulder to pull him close as they head towards the waiting car. He may have asked, but his mind is already made up—Jimin is getting that tattoo.

“I’m a little nervous,” Jimin confesses, grasping the car door handle and hesitantly tugging it open, “It’s been a while.” He slides into his seat and gets comfortable next to Jungkook. He’s a little out of his element, but he trusts the man, surprisingly enough. He can’t pinpoint why, but he finds solace in his touch—a sense of calm that makes him feel like he could tackle anything. “I don’t even know what I’m going to get,” he laughs, “Shit, Jeon, what did you talk me into?”

“Do you trust me?” Jungkook’s eyes fall on Jimin as he says so, repeating the same words he once said back at their first photoshoot. Without a response, he gives a vague wave of his hand and the chauffeur begins to drive. He places his hand on Jimin’s thigh and let’s it rest there, giving it a light, reassuring squeeze.

It’s not just Jungkook’s words or his touch that pulls Jimin closer—it’s the undivided attention, and his tranquil gaze. Every now and then, Jimin swears he can see the man’s soul in his dark irises. They’re so receptive and kind, but piercing and cool, all at once.

“I trust you,” he speaks above a whisper. Just as he did at their first photo shoot, Jimin places his full and complete trust in Jungkook’s hands. He’s a proven visionary—not only a renowned artist but a man with true vision. If he wants this permanent marking to have the greatest meaning, he’ll leave the final decision up to Jeon Jungkook. That moment in the glass room changed Jimin—seeing his faults fall between the cracks of those mirrored shards, scattered across the floor. He owes this to him. Everything that’s come from that moment has only made Jimin stronger—a better version of himself. “I want you to choose what I get.”

‘‘Really?’‘ Jungkook’s doe eyes widen before they squint in a smile. Small wrinkles appear in the corners of his eyes, adorning his skin. He feels butterflies erupting in his chest at the way Jimin willfully gives his trust. He seems entirely head over heels, and that’s exactly what he wants. Jungkook cranes his neck to close the last bit of distance between their lips in a sweet kiss. He pulls back just enough to stare at how Jimin gazes back in awe, only to lean forward and place another kiss on his plush lips...and another, and another. It’s like a drug. Lips, intoxicating, the way they envelope his with loving care.

Jimin presses back firmly to Jungkook and unbuckles his seatbelt to get closer. There’s far too much pent-up energy and nerves in his body to resist. He moves his hand to the back of the younger man’s neck and guides the kiss. He pulls him deeper, gliding his velvety tongue along Jungkooks, crawling into his lap and straddling him face-to-face. “Really,” he breathes against his hot lips, “Want you to mark me, sir.”

Jungkook can tell that Jimin’s words have double meaning, which causes him to smile. The plush of his bottom lip grazes the blonde’s. “It’s a promise, butterfly,” he whispers smoothly as his hands settle in a firm grip on Jimin’s hip bones, squeezing lightly to feel the soft flesh push out between his fingers. Jimin always seemed so fragile when he was like this, yet the innocence in his eyes is nowhere to be seen when he’s slowly becoming corrupted by Jungkook’s various temptations.

Jimin soaks in the feeling of Jungkook’s hands on his hips and allows them to hold him close for the duration of the ride. He wants them to hold him everywhere at once, but unfortunately, Jeon Jungkook isn’t Vishnu with four arms. However, at least in Jimin’s mind, he is god-like. Is it odd for him to think so highly of a man he’s known for less than a week? Life moves quickly in the world of fashion—working partnerships are just another part of it. In the words of Heidi Klum, “one day you’re in, and the next, you’re out.” At this point, he’ll do anything to stay in.

The model cards his fingers through Jungkook’s soft hair as he slides off his lap, giving him a small peck on the lips before settling back into his seat. The car pulls up to the curb of the shop; Jimin instantly feels his tingly heartbeat in the tips of fingers as they wrap around the door handle. A moment of pause, then... “Lets get it,” he breathes out in a wisp of a laugh.

Jungkook smiles as he leans over Jimin to place his long fingers on top of the blonde’s, unlocking the door with him to push it open. As they head inside, the bell to the shop chimes.

“Jungkookie!” They’re met with a dimpled smile greeting them across the room, pen in-hand, working on a sketch. The man stands up to approach the two and gives Jungkook a hug before doing the same to Jimin.

He surely isn’t shy.

“Is this Jimin? I’m Namjoon.” He takes a step back to observe the blonde, shooting a quick glance at Jungkook that basically says ‘nice.’

Jimin straightens his posture to give the best impression as it seems this man is not only the one about to stick needles in his flesh, but also a good friend of Jungkook’s. As he’s quickly gathered, it’s a rare occasion to meet anyone Jungkook would call a friend. Jimin can only imagine what he makes of his relationship with the photographer. Namjoon’s dark-lined eyes hold firm on Jimin’s, almost softening to put him at ease. “Park Jimin,” the model smiles, “it’s nice to meet you.”

“Likewise,” Namjoon smiles back, his prominent dimples on display. He heads towards his desk to pick up the sketch he was working on, beckoning for the others to come closer, “Check this out.”

Jungkook steps beside Namjoon to take a look. “Perfect,” He coos, doe eyes observing the beautiful flower that Joon had sketched on the paper.

“Great,” Namjoon smiles wider, showing Jimin the sketch. It's a delicate drawing of red petals from the sage flower—the meaning behind it being ‘Forever mine,’ which is sketched in a short note at the foot of the page for reference. Joon already knew this is what Jungkook wanted for this one—always something floral, and always different meanings behind them. This one is the most meaningful one he’s ever done...and not just one more flower to be added to Jungkook’s collection on his arms.

Even on the paper, the red petals seem to burn off the page. It’s as if they’re begging to escape the confines of 2D and become immortalised forever, sunk permanently into Jimin’s flesh. He’s lost for words as he scans every detail even though he’s already set on having it on him for life.

“It really is perfect,” he smiles at the cheery dimpled man. He turns to Jungkook and is pleased to see he’s equally enthralled with the finished product. “You’ve chosen well, Jeon.” He drops his hand down onto his own hip until it lands high on his thigh. “Are we still thinking here, or…somewhere else?”

Jungkook’s eyes rake down Jimin’s body in thought for a long moment until they land on his upper thigh. It seems like the perfect spot, and watching the process will be the most enticing part of it all.

“Right here is perfect,” He agrees, placing his hand on top of Jimin’s to apply light pressure onto the firm muscle.

“Splendid,” Namjoon nods before gesturing towards the large, comfortable chair in the room. “Please remove your pants and have a seat.”

Joon heads over to his chair and rolls it over to his desk to gather necessities while waiting for the blonde to get ready.

Mind over matter—Jimin slides his pants down quickly like he would at any runway show. In a situation like this, modesty flies right out the window. In a matter of minutes he’ll be poked raw while Jungkook watches, and the thought alone makes him hastily take his seat in front of the artist, eager to begin.

“Jungkook?” Jimin asks, looking up at the tall man while he towers over him protectively, “You’ll stay here, right? You won’t leave?” His hand itches to hold his as he hears Namjoon whir the machine a couple times to prep the needles.

“I’ll be here every second,” Jungkook promises with a small nod, reaching to brush away Jimin’s fringe from his forehead before grabbing a chair to take a seat next to him, “I chose the piece after all.”

Namjoon smiles to himself at the sweet exchange, noting just how well Jungkook has Jimin wrapped around his finger. It almost reminds him of how he himself used to feel the same way, once upon a time. “Alright, take deep breaths and don’t move. Let me know if you need to take a break,” Namjoon says as he scoots closer in his chair to place the stencil on Jimin’s upper thigh. He observes the placement before giving Jungkook a questioning look, rather than giving the decision to Jimin. Once Kook confirms with an approving nod, Joon gets to work, whirring the machine as he draws the first line. Both men glance at Jimin between strokes, attentive to see his reaction.

The stinging sensation of pulsing needles on Jimin’s soft flesh is not foreign, yet they feel sharper this time around. Deeper. Joon does not have a light-handed approach, likely as a stylistic choice for bold line work, but it makes the fine hairs at the back of Jimin’s neck stand on end. The artist’s attention to detail reminds him of the perfectionist in himself. He acted similarly when he sketched his clothing designs for the BYL collection, so he respects the process. He grits his teeth and bares through the pain. He can feel Jungkook’s gaze land heavy on his thigh as the needles stitch into his skin and embed vibrant ink. The younger man’s investment in this spontaneous decision is enchanting. The design he chose is brilliant and thoughtful. Jimin wonders if he’s devoted this much of his undivided attention to anyone else besides himself. Surely a man of his prestige has better things to do than this with him .

Nonetheless, Jimin pushes his insecurity aside and places his hand on Jungkook’s thigh for assurance.

Jungkook observes every stroke of Namjoon’s wrist with deep focus to make sure there is not a single mistake done to Jimin’s precious skin. He’s more invested in this moment than he has been with anybody else. Luckily, he knows he can trust Namjoon to do a job that is nothing but absolutely perfect. Watching Jimin’s skin slowly gain lines and colors with a design he chose...it’s a feeling unmatched by any other. ... Well , possibly matched by the way Jimin is obviously struggling to keep a straight face. The light twitches in his plush lips are so endearing. Jungkook grabs Jimin’s small hand and gently strokes his knuckles with his thumb, holding it like that the entire time.

Then, after what feels like forever, the buzzing of the machine finally comes to an end. Namjoon places the needle gun back on the desk before cleaning Jimin’s thigh off, inching forward to inspect the finished result. “Alright, we’re all done. Take a look by the mirror over there if you want a proper view.” Joon directs his words towards Jimin, but his eyes flicker to Jungkook’s.

Standing on his feet is a raw task, but Jimin does it with a brave face, placing weight on the leg until it feels comfortable enough to walk on. The mirror doesn’t do the piece justice—up-close it is perfectly placed on his toned thigh and brilliantly shaded. He ghosts his fingers over the fresh ink, hovering just above, slightly bewildered that it’s a part of him forever. He turns to Namjoon and nods his approval, then looks to Jungkook, trying to assess his reaction. From what he could tell, then man is just as pleased, maybe even more. It is his design concept, after all, and he should be proud. Jimin rests his hand at his side but can still feel Jungkook’s hand—thumb working in soothing circles. It makes him wonder if perhaps he’s relaxed enough to take the pain as well.

“While we’re here,” Jimin says confidently, feeling the dopamine pulse in his rosy numb flesh, “are you getting one too?”

“I am, actually.” Jungkook's small smirk tugs at his lips as he remains still, eyes still admiring the work on Jimin's thigh. Forever would he be marked with the piece that he had chosen. And now he’s about to get one of his own. Kook guides Jimin to have the seat next to him as he gets himself ready, extending his arm to expose the ink-free piece of his skin on his lower arm. Meanwhile, Joon prepared another set of needles. He rolls up to the youngest to place his stencil, raising his eyebrows in a silent question of 'Good?' With an approving nod from Jungkook, the familiar buzzing sound of the machine echoes once more. Joon marks Jungkook with a similar design as the one on Jimin's thigh; however, slightly different. While Jimin's is a work of red petals, Jungkook's is the flower itself, with petals falling off of it. As with every other piece Namjoon had done on the photographer in the past, he marks Jungkook's flower tattoo with a barely visible number. It’s a sly way of tracking each time the man has brought someone in to tattoo themselves for him. Why? Who knows. It is a mystery only known to the man himself.

Jimin notes the small number as Namjoon etches it onto Jungkook, not even sure if it is a number he’s seeing or just another part of the blooming bud. The photographer’s silken skin beads with fresh droplets of blood, obstructing his view of the design. He doesn’t even wince when the hairpin needles pierce his skin over and over, like he’s done it so many times it’s as casual as a monthly haircut. Jungkook is a seasoned professional in Jimin’s eyes. He admires the painless way he endures Namjoon’s heavy-handed pricking in what he assumes to be a sensitive part of the body to mark. He can’t pretend he isn’t shocked the photographer had the foresight to plan matching tattoos, and was too bold to assume Jimin would want it. But Jeon Jungkook's bold decisions are what attracted Jimin to him in the first place.

“You’re doing well,” Jimin assures, soothing his hand over the wide expanse of Jungkook’s back. “You’re doing really well...”

Just as the tattoo begins to form into a coherent piece of art, Jimin’s pocket vibrates. He pulls his phone free and stares down at the notifications, quickly hiding it at his side once he realizes who messaged him.

Jungkook smiles at the sweet words coming from the elder, but it fades just as quickly when he notices the slight tilt of Jimin's phone screen to keep it just out of his vision. Kook can't help the curiosity that gradually morphs to swirling annoyance in his gut. He just can't help it—he hates secrets when they’re kept from him. Could it be the same person Jimin was on the phone with earlier? The younger isn't oblivious, and he really wishes this wouldn't cause any trouble. But before he can comment on the split second, the phone is shoved back into Jimin's pocket, and Namjoon chimes that he's finished.

“Alright, we're done here,” Namjoon clicks his tongue and wipes Jungkook's arm clean, observing the masterpiece with his squinted eyes. He rolls his chair out and stretches his back until his spine pops. “Good, Jungkookie?”

“Perfect.” Jungkook approves as he gets up off his chair, looking down at the new piece of art on his skin. A mark just for Jimin. He displays it for the blonde, a crooked eyebrow following with his toothy grin, “Now we match.”

Jimin tries to muffle the sound of incoming text messages as they continue to vibrate in his pocket. If it isn’t Seung-Ho, it’s surely his manager on behalf of Seung-Ho. The man is persistent when he wants Jimin’s attention—but why does it have to be now? Jimin doesn’t have the nerve to check his phone, especially not when Jungkook proudly displays his fresh ink.

“It’s—” Jimin leans closer, grasping the man’s bicep to steady his body. He squints to take in every little detail, down to the faint number etched at the center of the design—but is it a number? It very well could be, but what does it mean? Jungkook doesn’t seem bothered by it in the slightest, so Jimin pushes his curiosity aside and examines the rest of the tattoo. “Not to be biased, but I think It’s the most beautiful flower.” The delicate way the red petals seem to fall down from Jungkook’s arm and onto Jimin’s thigh is wholly picturesque. Jimin would be lying if he said it didn’t excite him, knowing the two of them will share this for the rest of their lives. If anything, let it serve as a reminder of their working partnership and the bond they shared shooting Jimin’s first solo collection. Give it time and perhaps the tattoos will increase in value. It’s not even a day old and it’s already Jimin’s new favorite piece of art. He lightly taps his tender thigh and savors the sting, flicking his eyes between both tattoos until they are melded in his mind as one. “It’s been a long day, Jeon,” he winces, tapping his tender flesh a little too roughly. “Ready to head out?”

Jungkook shakes his head with a mischievous, toothy grin growing on his face. “Not yet, I have one more thing.” He speaks as he stares at Namjoon, who suddenly seems to shrink where he stands despite being the tallest of them all.

“Are you sure? It'll hurt.” Joon asked with his eyebrows raised high, feeling the itch in his fingers. He really wants to do it, but he also wants to make sure this was truly what the younger desires. He does hope for a ‘yes’ though. There is nothing else he wants right now than to feel and see Jungkook, even if it's in a professional setting.

“Yes, I've planned this for a while now.” Jungkook's hands travel to the hem of his pants, tugging at the waistline as his grin grows wolfish, “And I want it right now.”

“O-okay...” Namjoon's voice strains, his heart practically bursting within his rib cage with excitement. He loves tattooing, but if there is anything he loves more, it’s body piercing. There is just something about the adrenaline he feels rushing down his spine when he feels the needles easily penetrate through flesh, to be adorned by a piece of jewelry. Joon would be lying if he said it didn't make his face heat up a bit.

“Alright, take a seat,” Namjoon clears his throat, sitting back down on his rolling chair and patting the client seat.

Jungkook doesn't hesitate to pull his pants down along with his underwear, shameless and confident in his body as he sits down, half laying in the seat, eyes fixed on Jimin's. He notes how the blonde's eyes immediately find exactly what Kook expects.

“Don't stare so intensely, I'll get excited,” Kook teases Jimin, then flickers his gaze down to meet Namjoon's, who is also seemingly swallowing tightly to keep his professional mask on.

This is too much fun.

“A-are you—” Jimin’s voice weakens as Namjoon grasps Jungkook’s flaccid length and lines up a small barbell at the tip, measuring for size. He very clearly is, no doubt about it. If he was confident going into the tattoo, Jungkook is beyond confident going into this. Jimin wants to ask permission to watch, but can tell right away that it’s Jungkook’s full intention that he do so. He really does like to put on a good show, and, well, Jimin is captivated.

Namjoon finds the perfect piece of jewellery and sets it aside to ready the needle. It’s much larger than Jimin would have imagined—it looks hallowed throughout and incredibly sharp. It’s difficult to understand why in this moment, but Jimin feels his skin heat with arousal at the mere thought of seeing Jungkook’s tip gleam with a pretty stud through it. He takes a seat beside him, aching to be as close as possible. He crosses his legs, already feeling his cock stiffen at the sight. Jungkook seems to be affected as well, gradually growing thicker, unabashedly, right in front of his audience of two.

Jimin nips his plushy bottom lip and focuses his curious eyes on Namjoon’s hand as he grasps the hardening cock, ready to pierce. “Be still,” Jimin warns, nearly salivating at the sight. “I want it to be perfect.”

“Namjoon knows what he's doing, it'll be nothing but perfect,” Jungkook sighs out his words when Joon's warm fingers wrap around his length, already half hard from having two sets of eyes immersed in him, and him only. “Right, Joonie?”

“Right…”' Namjoon whispers through his teeth, his eyebrows tightly knit together in focus. It’s not easy to keep himself collected when Jungkook's cock is literally within his grasp. It’s heavy, and the all too familiar feeling of it makes his gut stir. “Just take a deep breath and don't move,” he warns as he brings the needle closer. His other hand keeps a firm grip around Kook's length, twitching once Joon's fingers tighten around it.

“Just do it before I get too hard…” Jungkook groans quietly. In all honesty, the photographer doesn’t care if he’s rock solid while getting pierced, he’s too much of a glutton for pain to mind it. Maybe he'd even prefer it that way. To say this is arousing would be an understatement.

Namjoon doesn't need to say anything else, and finally presses the needle through the flesh. For other professionals, this might've been too slow, but for the two of them, this was just the perfect torture. The needle is so sharp it practically melts through Jungkook's cock, and it has Namjoon foaming at the mouth when he hears Jungkook's audible moan echo in the studio.

“Fuck, hyung!” Jungkook curses through gritted teeth. His hand instinctively reaches out to grab Namjoon by his hair, tugging harshly. “All the way through, keep going.”

Namjoon's lower lip is tightly clamped between his teeth as he holds back the vibrating groan in his chest, finishing what he started as he finally pushes the needle through entirely; the bloody sharp tip of the needle sticking out on the other side. It’s gorgeous.

Jimin’s body feels hot and electric as the pain of his tattoo dissipates and is replaced with pure exhilaration. He watches every movement with wide blown-out pupils. His mouth is impossibly parched, he can’t will himself to swallow out of fear he might blink and miss a millisecond.

Namjoon loops the barbell through the hallowed tip of the needle and threads it through as the needle glides free of Jungkook’s stiffening length. It’s set aside, freeing a small bead of blood to trail down his shaft.

Jimin tears a fresh sheet of paper towel from a neighboring roll and dabs the wound gently. The younger man’s reddened tip swells under his touch and only spurs Jimin on to dab with excess—more than what’s needed, but selfish and satisfying for his own pleasure. He nips his bottom lip roughly until he’s sure he might draw blood of his own, then looks up at Jungkook with nothing but urgent need, silently begging to leave straight away. Jimins needy look doesn't go unnoticed by the younger, giving the blonde a reassuring wink.

“You did well hyung.” Jungkook leans in to press a light kiss on Namjoons forehead before he stands up, observing the little addition on his length. The pain is delicious, stinging and amplifying the throbbing pulse rushing from his heart to his cock.

Yeah, he needs to put it to use...there was no way around it.

Jungkook pulls his underwear and pants on, nonchalantly clasping the button on his jeans before he beckons Jimin to follow him like a puppy. “We will be back when I want some additions to my butterfly.” Jungkook grins at Joon, knowing the man knows exactly what he means, and that he'd have to be prepared. Soon.

The bell chimes loudly as Jungkook holds the door open for Jimin, giving Namjoon one last silent look before he walks out.

#fic: mused obsession #yandere jungkook #jungkook x jimin #jikook #yandere bts #bts mxm #jikook fic #sombreboy #chimoona

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severetimetravelnerd · 4 years

Text

Would you like a cookie? (ft. G Dragon)

Neighbour AU, Friends to Lovers AU

Taglist:

@unabashedturkeytreeslime

@kwonnansi

@happiestgirlontheeastcoast

Word Count : Around 9k

It’s Jiyong’s birthday today, and so, I wrote a one shot about him :)))) Happy Birthday!! I hope you have a wonderful and happy year ahead:)) For those who are following Hatred and Love, I’m sorry for taking so long :(( I just want it to be perfect :))) There are appearances from Mino, Taeyang and Hyorin. Enjoy :))

Warnings: Language, Smut, Insecurities

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You sighed as you finally flopped down on your couch, exhausted. It was 1 am and you had only just finished moving in and getting your new apartment to look vaguely habitable. Oh, who were you kidding? The place was a mess with cartons of your stuff everywhere. You had just about managed to put away enough things to occupy your room, and although you knew you should just put away everything and go to bed once and for all, your love for naps got the better of you and you set an alarm for 3 am, telling yourself that your alarm was so obnoxiously loud that it was bound to wake you up. It wasn’t. You only woke up at 7 in the morning because the sunlight proved to be too much for you to sleep through. You groaned as you got out of bed, body aching all over from the work you did yesterday. You fought your instinct to just get back into bed and sleep the day away and jumped into the shower, hoping that a cold shower would jolt you out of the sleepy, dazed state you were in. It did, and as you got out of the shower, pink cheeked and fresh faced, hair dripping wet, you felt considerably better. You changed into a ratty old t-shirt and a loose pair of shorts and got around to finishing the rest of your work, no matter how long it took.

It took you ages, but you finally finished getting your new place in order, happy with how it looked. You looked down at yourself, making a small face when you realised how sweaty you were. You sighed and got in for another shower. After getting out and changing into something more presentable than your ratty old t-shirt, you headed straight for your kitchen, because you were determined to make a good impression on the neighbours and make them something from the heart. You wanted to bake them cookies. You knew you were a bit of a klutz, but if there was one thing you were proud of, it was your recipe for chocolate chip cookies. Even if you were saying so yourself, they were brilliant and no one who had ever tasted them to go back to anything else. You did the math. You would have to make enough for five houses. Two for the floor below you, two for the floor above you and one for the person across from you. You packed them up neatly, all wrapped in pretty paper and tied them with a ribbon, and as you looked down at them, you couldn’t help the satisfied smile that spread across your face and the excitement rising in you.

You rang the doorbell of the house across from you, waiting nervously. You were hoping you would be good friends with this one. After all, they were the neighbours closest to you. But as you rang the doorbell a few more times only to get no response, your excitement faded a little. They were either in there and ignoring you, or they were out. For your sake, you decided to assume they were out. You let out a long sigh and you too the lift down, determined to at least give the rest of the neighbours the cookies and make some friends. When you stepped back into the lift to finally go back home, you were decidedly bittersweet. You met the rest of your neighbours, and while they were lovely, you were hoping for someone more around your age. A friend. Not babies, no matter how adorable, or grandmas, no matter how sweet. You stared down at the neatly packaged cookies for your closest neighbour in your hands, and the only thing keeping you from throwing them away was your strong hatred for wasting food. Caught up in those thoughts, you didn’t realise that the lift went all the way down to the lowest level until it was too late. The only thing you could do was supress a frustrated scream and make do with rolling your eyes. Trust your luck. You just kept your head down, annoyed, not noticing the two men who walked into the lift just then.

Jiyong and Youngbae walked into the lift, Youngbae having just driven Jiyong home after a crazy work session at the studio. Jiyong was too exhausted to stand straight, let alone drive. They didn’t notice you at the back, and Jiyong was crabby from the exhaustion. Leaning against Youngbae’s shoulder, Jiyong frowned when Youngbae wouldn’t stand still, moving his head around, sniffing the air. Irritated, he asked,

“What’re you doing Youngbae?”

Youngbae looked around again, and sniffed. Sounding convinced, he said,

“Jiyong, I can smell brownies.”

Jiyong just rolled his eyes, not even bothering to look up.

“You’re going insane Youngbae.”

Youngbae frowned and persisted.

“No, seriously!”

You perked up when you heard Youngbae say brownies, sniffing around to see if that was true. You shook your head, confused. You couldn’t seem to smell them either. Jiyong let out a long sigh.

“Youngbae, I can also smell them, but that’s probably just my imagination since I haven’t eaten properly in days. You’re probably just hungry.”

Youngbae turned around now, sniffing around more insistently.

“No Jiyong, I can smell it! I swear it’s in here somewhere.”

And as he turned around, he made eye contact with you, who was also sniffing around. You gave him a sheepish smile, but he didn’t return it. His eyes just went straight to the bag in your hands. He looked triumphant when he turned to face Jiyong.

“See! I told you so! That lady has some in her bag!”

It was supposed to be a whisper, but you heard him anyway. You were confused for a minute before you realised it. He was just smelling the cookies. Just as you were about to reach into your bag and offer them some, Jiyong scoffed.

“Youngbae, she does not! Stop it! You’re just embarrassing her!”

Before he could say anything else though, you entered the conversation with a welcoming smile on your face.

“Actually, I don’t have brownies, but I think you’re smelling the cookies I baked earlier.”

You reached out and handed Youngbae the packaged cookies that you had originally intended for your neighbour.

“I meant to give this to my neighbour, but it’s late and I don’t think we’ll be meeting today. Would you like some instead?”

Youngbae smiled back at you, but Jiyong was so sleep deprived that he was more annoyed that he was wrong than pleased about the free food. He turned and looked away, and your smile faltered a bit. Youngbae eyes turned apologetic. He reached out for the cookies.

“Thank you so much. I’d be more than happy to have some. Please excuse my friend though. He’s hardly slept this week, and that’s making him obnoxious.”

Jiyong glared at Youngbae while you laughed, not feeling so bad after all. The lift finally reached your floor and you were about to get off and say goodbye when they both stepped out as well. Both your eyes and Youngbae’s eyes widened in surprise, Jiyong too tired to notice. Youngbae extended his hand in a handshake.

“Oh, so you’re Jiyong’s new neighbour? Welcome! I’m Youngbae. I don’t live here, but you’ll see me often because Jiyong is practically incapable of doing anything on his own.”

He ended with a joking eye roll. You laughed.

“Oh well, looking forward to seeing you Youngbae. I’m Y/N.”

You turned and tried to look at Jiyong. he avoided eye contact.

“Hi Jiyong. Nice to meet you. Since I already gave Youngbae your cookies, can I get you some more? I always have extras at home.”

Jiyong just stared at you, with your warm smile and crinkly eyes and ignored you, opting instead to turn around and walk into his house. Your smile faded. That was rude. And mean. And made you feel terrible. Youngbae mouthed a sorry at you before disappearing into the house as well. You sighed. Maybe you weren’t going to have a great relationship with your neighbours after all. Youngbae on the other hand, followed Jiyong in, fully intending to lecture him about how he treated you when he found Jiyong collapsed on the couch, fast asleep. He shook his head and left, knowing that Jiyong would apologise after he remembered how he treated you.

To say you were not a morning person was an understatement. You fucking hated mornings, and if you had your way, you wouldn’t get out of bed before noon. Which is why when you were woken up by the constant ringing of the doorbell at 9 am the next morning, you were pissed.

Without thinking about anything other than biting off the head of whoever decided to wake you up, you marched to the door, hair looking wild, eyes puffy and still wrapped in your blanket. You swung open the door, not knowing who it was but prepared to kill when you found a sheepish Jiyong standing outside your door. Your mood soured even more. What did this asshole have to say? Glaring at him, you dared him to say whatever he wanted to. Jiyong suddenly seemed very interested in the ceiling. Your voice positively frigid, you said,

“Yes?”

Jiyong jumped a little and then put on a brave front. He cleared his throat and began.

“Hi Y/N. I’m Jiyong.”

He smiled a warm smile, faltering a little when you didn’t respond with one of your own.

“I just wanted to apologise for how I treated you yesterday. I’m sorry. I was just running on two hours of sleep for a week, and I know that’s not an excuse, but I hope that gives you context for why I was so crabby yesterday. It was nothing personal and I’m sorry I hurt your feelings.”

Your frozen expression slowly started to warm a little. You always did have a soft spot for guys who apologised and did it well, which was okay considering they were rare. You were still a little wary, but you melted enough to give him a slight smile. Encouraged by that, Jiyong moved a little closer, leaning against the wall with an adorably hopeful smile.

“Is your offer for cookies still on?”

Surprising even yourself, you found yourself opening the door and inviting him in for cookies. You were in your nightclothes. He was in his nightclothes. Neither of you said anything about it.

Four months later, you weren’t surprised when you came back home from work and found Jiyong lounging around on your couch, watching a drama. He raised his hand to you in greeting and you nodded, not joining him because you were going to shower and cook something for dinner. You and Jiyong had a routine now. You had become close. After the morning where he sheepishly came and asked for cookies, you started dropping by every time you baked something, and when you noticed he ordered food from outside for pretty much all his meals, you simply asked him to join you. You loved cooking, so making a little extra never bothered you. Besides, in thanks, he would help you clean your place, which was good, considering you could be a little … messy at times. Just like that, the two of you started spending more time together and got close. Of course, you knew that you weren’t his best friend, but you were still his binge-watching buddy and meal time buddy and that was okay. You also knew that you were a whole lot more invested in that relationship than he was because of the simple fact that you liked him. You might have developed a crush on him and you knew it was bad. You liked him and you wished you didn’t, because it was clear to the whole world to see that he didn’t see you the way you saw him. You wished you were more than just a neighbour to him, but you knew it wasn’t fair to expect any more. You were glad enough that the two of you could become friends. You knew not to push your luck, especially since his type seemed to be supermodels. You’d heard a lot about his ex from him, since they were still close friends. Of course, it hurt to have to see him with other women, and to have him never see you the same way, but you did your level best to never take it out on him. It wasn’t his fault either.

A few days later, you were just chilling at home, enjoying a lazy day baking. You couldn’t help but make small subconscious decisions for Jiyong’s sake, like baking his favourite lemon cake and caramel brownies. Once all the work was done, and you were satisfied with everything, you took a look at the clock. It was around 6 in the evening. Not too late to drop in at Jiyong’s studio and give him some food. You shook your head as you packed everything up. he never ate properly when he was working. Someone always had to remind him.

You reached the YG building, calling him as you parked your car. He answered on the third ring, sounding noticeably distracted.

“Hey Y/N. What’s up?”

You smiled and answered.

“I made your favourite cake and brownies. I thought I’d drop by with them.”

You were a little hurt when he just hummed an affirmation, not sounding too pleased, but you told yourself that it was probably just because he was busy. Getting out of the lift at his floor, you smiled to yourself because you knew he would love the food, when you heard your name. A woman’s voice was saying it.

“Y/N? Who is she?”

You also heard Jiyong sigh and then say,

“She’s my… friend.”

You couldn’t help the way your heart dropped. Was he seriously that unhappy that you dropped by? Did he really have to think about it that much to decide whether you were his friend? You paused for a minute to take a few deep breaths. You then forced yourself to smile the most realistic fake smile you had in you and pushed open the door. You originally thought you’d sit and watch him work for a while, but you didn’t want to make things worse, so you decided you’d go after dropping off the food. Your determination to leave cemented itself when you walked in and realised the woman’s voice belonged to his ex. One look at her, with her beautiful, goddess like skin, friendly smile and twinkling eyes made your gut twist. You knew the moment you saw her that you could never hate her. She was so nice and friendly. And it just made you feel even worse, because while you liked her personality, every second you spent around her made you feel worse about yourself. You were much shorter than her, your skin somehow looked both oily and dry, your hair was just a bundle of frizz. You felt shabby. You already knew his standards. It just hurt to compare yourself to it. Suddenly, you felt like your smile looked awkward, your clothes looked drab and you just looked like shit. Forcing yourself to keep the smile on your face, you waved at her. She smiled and moved to help you with the boxes.

“Hi Y/N. I’m (his ex’s name). These smell heavenly!”

You smiled back at her.

“Hi. I’ve heard so much about you! It’s so nice to finally meet you.”

She laughed.

“All good, I hope?”

You bit the inside of your cheek before replying an honest answer that made your heart hurt.

“Yup, all good.”

You turned to Jiyong, who hadn’t bothered to acknowledge your presence.

“I made the cake and brownies. I just came to drop it off. I’ll get going now.”

For the first time since you arrived, he turned, looking at you questioningly.

“Already?”

You nodded, struggling to keep up the act. You felt even worse that he never let you go visit him, saying you would distract him, but his ex was right there with him. You thought you were close enough for that. Jiyong’s features slowly morphed into a frown once he took in your forced smile and your hurry to leave.

“Y/N, are you sure? Is everything okay?”

You painfully managed one last beam at him.

“Yeah, everything is fine. I just had a little time so I thought I’d get these to you. I’ll get going now.”

And you left before he could stop you and interrogate you again. You might have cracked and told him, but you knew you didn’t need a rejection when you already knew what his answer was going to be.

You wanted to avoid him for the next few days, once the raw pain of your last encounter with him left, but you didn’t have to worry about that, because he was too busy working anyway. He didn’t come home for the next ten days and he didn’t bother to even send you a text, asking you whether everything was okay or thanking you for the food. You didn’t expect thanks, but you were still a little hurt that he didn’t bother to check up on you. You tried your level best to get rid of those thoughts, because you knew you were behaving like you were entitled to his affection, but they just weren’t going. So, you let yourself sulk for a few days and slowly, you got over it by just not thinking about it. When he finally did come home, you knew you wouldn’t have to worry about seeing him for the next two days because he typically sleeps through two days straight before wanting to interact with humans. You figured you would be okay by then. Life, unfortunately, had other plans for you.

It was the third day, the day Jiyong would typically get up. he had already texted you saying he would be over for dinner that night. You couldn’t explain what that text made you feel. You felt elation at the thought of seeing him again, but you also felt excruciating pain at the thought of having to be around him and pretend like he was just another friend. You bit your lips, deciding to go shower to get those thoughts out of your mind. You just stepped into the bathroom, humming a little tune and stood under the shower, fiddling with the controls to try and get the perfect mixture of hot and cold when the shower handle broke. It just plain snapped into two. You stood there, staring at the broken off handle in your hand, unable to believe it. You had some weird DIY hair masque of yoghurt and honey on your hair and you had to wash it off. It was late and you wouldn’t be able to get a plumber. Your head started to hurt when you realised what that meant. You would have to go and ask Jiyong whether you could use his bathroom. Cursing yourself for your weird affinity for late night baths, you gathered up all your clothes and covered your hair with a shower cap. You threw on a loose shirt and muttering under your breath, you went and rang Jiyong’s doorbell. He opened the door, standing there in a loose t-shirt and shorts, rubbing his sleepy eyes before he finally looked up and realised you were standing there. He blinked a few times, taking in the sight of you standing there with yoghurt all over your hair and a bunch of your stuff in your hands, cheeks flushed from embarrassment. He started to smirk, and with a teasing look in his eyes, he said,

“Well, hello grandma. I didn’t realise you were visiting me today. You know, you look really young for your age.”

You rolled your eyes and pushed past him.

“Haha, very funny. My shower isn’t working and I need to wash this stuff out of my hair.”

He groaned.

“Oh god. My bathroom is going to smell awful, isn’t it?”

but he still opened the door to his bedroom and showed you to his bathroom. While he was showing you how to work the fancy rain shower he had, he turned and looked you over, frowning.

“You take your time. I’ll order some pizza. You look tired. Take a break today. Oh, and thanks for the cake and stuff. They were really good.”

You were grateful he turned around and didn’t notice the slight blush you had spread across your cheeks. He cared.

You had a long, relaxing shower. That fancy shower really did make a difference. You sang your heart out, although you weren’t any good, and danced along to some of your favourite songs, taking your time to condition your hair, wanting it to smell nothing like yoghurt. You stepped out and towelled your hair, taking your time to put on some moisturiser and got out of the bathroom to change into your clothes, with only a towel wrapped around you. You were not expecting Jiyong to be in the room. Both of you froze for a second and then, he started. Looking straight at your eyes, he started talking, with not a single sign of embarrassment or awkwardness at having seen you like that.

“Oh, you’re done? I wasn’t sure whether you had a towel, so I came to leave one here, just in case. Also, the pizza will get here in the next five minutes.”

And he walked out, leaving you stumped and dismayed. Were you so deep inside the friendzone that even seeing you in a towel made no difference to him? You flopped down on the bed, upset. Seriously? Were you that bad? Were you so invisible to him? You groaned. Just when you were getting over the last thing, he found another way to hurt your feelings. You sat up and slapped yourself lightly.

“Okay, Y/N, come on! You just need to get through this one night.”

You started changing, about to put on your bra, but then, with a determined snort, you decided against it. You would try again. Just one more time. He had to react in some way if you were braless. If he was the slightest bit attracted to you, he would make a move.

Two hours later, you just waited to walk through your front door before crumbling again. He didn’t. He didn’t make the slightest move and didn’t even acknowledge it, and it was pretty obvious with the loose t-shirt you were wearing. He didn’t behave the slightest bit perturbed. Seeing you braless and in only a towel had done nothing to him. He just wasn’t attracted to you. And as you sat there, eyes red, eating salted caramel ice cream, you told yourself to suck it up. it wasn’t something you didn’t know already. You had met his ex. That crippling feeling of insecurity came back. You remembered how horrible you felt when you compared yourself to her, and a tear slipped out of your red eyes. You sniffed and took a large bite of ice cream. You would be okay. You had to be.

You were right. You had to be okay. So, you forced yourself to be okay around Jiyong. you had gotten pretty good at it. You were trying to stay positive, thinking about how you got to spend time with him, but you being stuck in the friendzone was still stuck at the back of your mind. A week after you realised just how deep down there you were, Jiyong randomly asked you something in between a drama.

“Y/N, I’m throwing a party tomorrow. It’s going to be quite chill, nothing too crazy. Just some food, some drinks and some alcohol. Of course, you have to come.”

He paused to glare at you.

“Because I know you don’t have any plans for tomorrow, but I was wondering whether you’d help me with clean up duty? You remember our deal, right?”

You mentally banged your head against a wall, because you did remember the deal. Whenever either of you would throw parties, the other would help clean up if they were free. He had already helped you once with that. You couldn’t get out of this one. You also felt like smacking yourself because you knew that somewhere deep down, you were getting hopeful that if you dressed up and looked nice enough, Jiyong might change his mind about you. You didn’t show him any sign of your inner monologue and you smiled.

“Sure, I’ll be there.”

Sure enough, the next day, your stupid, ever-so-hopeful side won out, and you went digging in your closet to find something that would make you look hot. You finally found it. That one outfit you bought on a whim that would save your life. A long black skirt, with a long slit on the left with a wine-red spaghetti strapped crop top. You knew his kind of crowd and it was the perfect mix of formal and sexy. You just threw on a shawl over that and picked out your strappiest of black heels. You didn’t like wearing them. They were painful, and they dug into your heels, but you were desperate. You wanted Jiyong to notice you. Taking a little time to give yourself one final pep-talk, you finally opened the door to Jiyong’s apartment, searching the crowd for him. You scanned the room, seeing a few faces you recognised. Youngbae and Hyorin smiled at you. Mino gave you an exaggerated wink, but you couldn’t find Jiyong. You face fell a little. You looked everywhere for him, unable to find him anywhere until you got to his bedroom. It was locked, and you were about to walk off, thinking it was just some random couple hooking up, when you heard Jiyong’s voice along with a voice you wished you didn’t recognise. So, it was just him and his ex in there. You scoffed to yourself and walked back to the living room, heading straight to the bar to get a shot. You didn’t want to get drunk. You just didn’t want to be so unhappy, and just a little bit of alcohol helped calm you down. You stopped at that one shot and moved away, finding a place on the couch, staring down at your phone. A few minutes later, Jiyong and his ex walked back into the room. you took one look at them and you felt a little sick. She was wearing his shirt, and he was wearing his shirt inside out. You didn’t need to be a genius to figure out what happened there. You blinked rapidly, trying to fight the tears you could feel were threatening to fall. You had gotten all dressed up, worn those ridiculous heels, done your hair and make up all nicely all in false hope. Why would you even try when she was around? Laughing a little at yourself and how pathetic you seemed in that moment, you refused to look up at him. You didn’t want to make eye contact. You would just wait to help him clean up. No more interacting with him for the night. You got up and went to the balcony, sitting in the swing, vigorously set off on mentally lecturing yourself about what an idiot you were, when you felt the seat dip next to you and you heard a familiar voice in your ear.

“Woah noona! You look great tonight!”

You turned to smile your first warm smile for the night at Mino.

“Thanks Mino.”

You and Mino met by accident, but got along really well. It was one of those nights were you just wanted to stay home and have a few drinks. A few drinks quickly became a lot and you were quite tipsy by the end of it. You were about to call your friend to come and drink with you when you heard a loud knocking on the door. You were curious about who it could be and you opened the door only to find Mino slumped against the wall, a stupid smile on his face, singing to himself. He got to his unsteady feet when he heard the door open.

“Ahhh hyung! Why did you take so long? Come! Let’s get drunk!”

and lifted his beer bottle. You lifted your can of beer and clinked it against his. Laughing at his confused expression, you said,

“I support the motion. Come in, I’ve got some drinks inside.”

When he started looking around puzzled, you laughed and had pity on him.

“Jiyong lives there.”

And you pointed at the door across from yours. You extended your hand and smiled.

“I’m Y/N, his neighbour.”

Mino looked back and forth between the two doors, confused for a little while and then he grinned at you. He shook your hand and walked into your apartment.

“Hi Y/N noona. I’m Mino, your new drinking buddy.”

He continued in a mock whisper.

“Jiyong hyung is a whiny drunk anyways.”

That night, the two of you did a rom-com movie marathon, both extremely tipsy and binging on all sorts of junk food. And Mino was right. He did become your new drinking buddy. And one of those nights when you were drunk, you had confided in him about your crush on Jiyong.

Mino looked at your warm smile and your surprisingly glassy eyes, and he knew why you were upset. He sighed and gave you a hug.

“I’m sorry he didn’t notice noona.”

You laughed. A small, humourless laugh, and then you snapped yourself out of it.

“It’s okay Mino. Don’t apologise. It’s not like you did anything wrong.”

Mino looked at your sad smile and he had to supress some anger at his hyung and how obtuse he could be. With a flirtatious smile, Mino tucked a little hair behind your ears.

“Well, noona, I, for one, think you look absolutely gorgeous tonight.”

You laughed at his attempt to cheer you up.

“Thanks Mino, but you’re a lousy flirt.”

He pouted and made the infamous puppy dog eyes.

“Noona, I’m not that bad!”

You ruffled his hair, and smirked.

“Sorry to break it to you, but you are actually that bad.”

Mino jumped to his feet and grabbed your hand, dragging you inside. He turned to face a surprised you and smirked.

“Well, for that series of insults that shattered my ego, you owe me a dance.”

Your eyes widened, making you look almost comical.

“Mino, you know I can’t dance!”

He gave you a light smirk as he twirled you around, making your back lean against his chest. His hands snaked around your waist and he reached for your hand to drape it over his neck. He slowly started guiding you to sway along with the rhythm while he leaned down and whispered in your ear,

“Well, that’s what I’m here for.”

You smiled with a light flush on your face.

“Okay Mino, I’ll admit that was smooth, but why are you doing this?”

He twirled you around again and pulled you even closer to him, leaning down to whisper in your ear and one of his hands reached up and undid your bun, letting your hair fall loose.

“Much better. I’ve always liked your hair like this.”

Leaning in even closer, he switched back to his normal self. In a low whisper, to make sure no one could hear him, he said,

“Noona, just go along with this. I have a hunch.”

You stared at his face suspiciously for a few seconds before giving in. You rested your head against his chest and pulled him down closer by his collar.

“I have no idea what you’re trying, but I’ll go along with it. I’ve got nothing better to do anyway.”

Mino just looked up to check whether his plan was working, and as he felt his hyung glaring daggers at him, his smirk deepened a little. His plan was working. Mino continued to blatantly flirt with you, and to the rest of the party, it seemed like the two of you were a thing, when in reality, both of you were struggling to not laugh. Mino twirled you around one last time before gently running his hands up and down your sides. He led you off the dance floor and back to the balcony. He looked at you, dead serious.

“Y/N noona, you trust me, right?”

You nodded. Mino looked behind you, and as he saw that familiar build, he knew he was right. He looked back at you and said,

“Trust me on this one too.”

And he grabbed your face and leaned in to kiss you. You closed your eyes, prepared to kiss him, but that never happened. Instead, you felt someone grab your hand in a vice grip and pull you away, muttering a half-hearted apology to Mino about how he needed your help with something. He pulled you straight through all the crowd and into his room, locking the door behind you. You stared around you and you felt a little sick. Wow, he was really something else. He had the gall to bring you to the room where he hooked up with his ex less than an hour ago because he was jealous you were dancing with Mino. You started to feel more than a little annoyed. He was really starting to get to you. You looked away at the walls and ceilings, not wanting to have to see his face. Jiyong’s voice was low and angry when he said,

“What the bloody hell were you doing with Mino out there?”

Still not looking at him, you replied.

“How is that any of your business?”

Jiyong was so angry he was practically hissing.

“It is my business if you try to hook up with my junior right in the middle of my house.”

You snorted, too incredulous to actually say something. Jiyong continued.

“You two were practically fucking on the dance floor.”

You froze for a second, shocked, and then, you hardened. Jiyong had gone too far. Your voice positively frigid, you said,

“I see.”

And you walked out, leaving a shocked, blabbering Jiyong behind. His expression melted when he saw you walk out. He didn’t mean to hurt you.

You spent the rest of the night on the balcony with Mino. Mino just took one look at your expression when you walked out of the room and he knew that things hadn’t gone well. And so, he decided to sit with you and keep you company, making sure you didn’t feel too low. You appreciated it. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see that Jiyong looked sad, apologetic, and he kept trying to make eye contact with you to try and apologise for the way he blew up, but you staunchly refused all of that. You didn’t want to talk to him. Not when you felt so hurt that the only reason you weren’t crying was because you were angry. Slowly, around two in the morning, people started to leave. Things were pretty close to wrapping up by 2:30. You were still sitting in the balcony while Jiyong was seeing his guests out. You had decided to stick things out and help him clean up because you didn’t want to owe him anything because you were planning on avoiding him after that. Youngbae, Hyorin and Mino were the last people to leave. The three of them were watching the two of you and trying to figure things out. Hyorin shook her head and muttered,

“God, Jiyong is an idiot.”

Youngbae nodded in agreement.

“He is. He’s really bad at trying to show her that he likes her.”

Mino took one look at the two of you and sighed. He rubbed his hands together and said,

“All right then. I’m going to go help speed things up. Make sure Jiyong hyung sees this.”

And as Mino walked over to you, Hyorin led a confused Youngbae up to Jiyong, making Jiyong turn around just in time to see what looked like Mino kissing you. In reality, he just grabbed your face and made faces at you, but from the back, it looked like a passionate kiss. Jiyong also saw you laugh and give Mino a tight hug. He didn’t know you had no idea why Mino did that and that you called him crazy, but he had seen enough. All his sadness melted away and was replaced with jealousy, making him quite rude to you.

You had gone to the kitchen, getting a trash bag so that you could get the work over and done with quicker. You hadn’t even been gone from the living room for five seconds when you heard Jiyong’s angry voice call you. Pausing for a second to steel yourself, you stepped back out.

“What is it Jiyong?”

His voice was harsh when he said,

“Were you trying to get out of cleaning duty?”

You just rolled your eyes and held up the trash bag.

“Clearly not, Jiyong.”

And you ignored him, moving around the house, getting rid of all the trash. He stared at you for a second, annoyed and unsure of what he should do next and then he got out a mop and began mopping up the spills around the place. He kept stealing glances at you, trying to get you to look at him, because the awkwardness between the two of you was killing him, but you never looked up at him. not even once. Jiyong didn’t know what to say, and the jealousy was clouding his mind. He had liked you ever since he first saw you, with all your hair sticking up and in ridiculous pyjamas. He had tried to drop hints. He had tried to make you jealous. But nothing seemed to work. He had resigned himself to thinking that you didn’t like him, and he would just have to get over it, but when you walked in, looking so unbelievably beautiful when Mino kissed you, he just felt himself lose it. Still mopping, Jiyong asked,

“So, Y/N. You and Mino, huh?”

You didn’t respond, but he needed to hear you say it. He needed to hear you tell him that you liked someone else so that he could finally try to move on. You stiffened when he said that, but didn’t say anything. He repeated himself, a little louder the second time around. You pretended like you didn’t hear him. Jiyong had had enough. he threw the mop down, letting the loud noise echo through the apartment, and walked up to you, grabbing your chin and making you look at him.

“Y/N. I’m asking you whether you like Mino.”

You stiffened, as though determined to fight it out before your body became slack, as though you gave up. You gave him a slight smile and with a shaky voice, you said,

“God, Jiyong. You really know how to hurt a girl, don’t you?”

He froze. You were sad. He had made you sad. Why were you sad? He watched you walk away for a second before realising that you were leaving. You were done. You had tried your best to help him and if after all that, Jiyong was still going to cause you so much pain, you were done. You had just walked through the door of your apartment, prepared to curl up in bed and cry when you heard someone walk in with you. You groaned, a little teary by now.

“Jiyong plea-”

He cut you off by slamming the door behind him and turning you around, so in a matter of seconds, you found yourself being pressed against a wall. He put his arms on either side of you, preventing you from moving. He had his head down, breathing heavily, as though trying to come to terms with something. He looked up at your teary eyes, his eyes equally pained and asked,

“What did you mean?”

You had nothing to say. You could only stare at that beautiful face, contorted in pain and confusion. His voice slightly calmer this time, he repeated himself.

“Y/N, what did you mean by that? When did I hurt you?”

You couldn’t help the tear that rolled down your cheek at that point. How could you possibly explain how he hurt you? He gently reached up to wipe your tears. His voice was soft when he said,

“Y/N, what’s wrong?”

You took a deep breath, trying your best to not become a crying mess.

“Jiyong, it’s not your fault. You didn’t mean any of it, except for just now, when you were an asshole about Mino.”

His voice both pained and soft, he asked,

“But what did I do Y/N?”

Fuck it. It was now or never. You already knew things with Jiyong would never be the same again. Tears started rolling down your face as you said,

“Jiyong, how?! How do you not know that I like you?”

Jiyong’s world froze around him while you broke down and started sobbing, desperately trying not to fall onto his shoulder. You refused to look up, scared to meet the pitying gaze you were sure he would have, but he gently but firmly grabbed your chin and made you look at him. when you finally opened your eyes, he was staring at you with a soft, gentle warmth.

“Y/N, how do you not know that I like you?”

It was your turn to be shocked, staring at him in uncomprehensive confusion. His hands cupped your face as he gently wiped off your tears.

“Y/N, I’ve liked you ever since you moved in here.”

You pouted a little, your lower lip trembled with a threat of tears.

“Jiyong don’t lie to me. You’ve never seen me that way. I know you hooked up with your ex today. You don’t need to pity me that much.”

All his anger, all his jealousy was gone and he just shook his head earnestly, thoroughly confused.

“Y/N, I swear we did not hook up today. We’ve never hooked up after we broke up. She’s seeing someone else.”

You stared at him, still a little suspicious.

“But you made it so clear that you only see me as a friend. Why didn’t you say anything earlier?”

He looked back at you, still confused.

“What’re you talking about?”

You sighed and grabbed his hand, walking over to the couch and sitting down there.

“We might as well get comfortable. You have a lot of explaining to do.”

He sat down next to you, waiting until you had crossed your legs and turned to him. Glaring at him, you asked,

“Why didn’t you say anything earlier? Why didn’t you behave like you liked me?”

He stared at you, incredulous.

“What do you mean “behave like you liked me?” Y/N. You’re the only person who has succeeded in getting me to eat well and on time. Loads of other people have tried too, but you’re the only one who succeeded. Why do you think you succeeded?”

You stared at him, still suspicious.

“Why do you think I spent so much time at your place? Because no matter how tired or sad I was, being with you cheered me up. you should ask Youngbae about that sometime. Before I met you, I would just stay in my apartment most of the time.”

You were still staring at him suspiciously. Jiyong rolled his sleeves up and turned to face you completely.

“I tried to make you jealous all the time.”

Catching your glare turn deadly, he quickly added,

“Now that I’ve experienced that method myself, I know how shitty it feels, and I swear I won’t ever do that again. But seriously. I tried to make you jealous so many times, and there was absolutely no reaction from you. That is the only reason I didn’t say anything to you. I thought that you would have reacted or said something or gotten mad if you liked me.”

You rolled your eyes and muttered,

“It’s called self-control.”

His voice turned soft.

“I know now. And I’m sorry. I didn’t realise how much it hurt to have to see that. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I’m just dumb when it comes to stuff like this.”

You sniffed a little, his words finally getting through to you.

“But why didn’t you say or do anything Y/N? And what was that with Mino?! You let him kiss you.”

Your eyes turned fiery again.

“First off, Mino didn’t kiss me, he just made faces at me! Secondly, I didn’t do anything?! You think all those times I came back from work, exhausted to the bone, but cooked or baked your favourite food was nothing? What about all the all-nighters I’ve pulled to keep you company when you’re working on something important? You know how much I value my sleep! What about all the ridiculously sappy shows I’ve watched with you, all though the lines made me want to gag?!”

You snorted, and gestured towards your outfit.

“Look at me! I dressed up like this, with shoes that make me feel like I’m walking on glass, hoping that you would notice me!”

He winced a little and while you continued on your rant, he slowly reached for your feet and slipped them off without you noticing.

“The only reason I didn’t say anything was because of all the girls you were around. Your ex is a literal supermodel. How do you think it made me feel to compare myself to her?! And it didn’t help that you showed no signs of liking me back.”

He moved a little closer to you and held your hand.

“I’m sorry Y/N.”

His eyes were sincere, and you knew he meant it, but you needed some answers.

“Why was she wearing your clothes and why is your shirt on inside out?”

Without batting an eyelid, he moved even closer and answered in an earnest, sincere voice.

“She puked all over herself and me, so both of us needed to change. I put it on like this because I was in a hurry to see you.”

Your breath hitched when he said that and you blushed. Still, you continued.

“What about the time she was in your studio? So, it was okay for her to be there but not me? And why was there hesitation when you called me your friend?”

“I didn’t want to call you my friend when I want you to be my girlfriend. And yeah, she can be there, but you can’t, because I can still work if she’s there, but if you’re there, it is literally impossible for me to pay attention to anything or anyone else.”

You heart started beating a whole lot faster and your face turned red. Your voice wasn’t so sure when you asked your last question.

“What about the time I showered at your place? You walked in on me wearing nothing but a towel, but you didn’t react at all.”

His hands gently pushed pulled you closer so that he could wrap his arms around you.

“Y/N, I didn’t want to make it awkward for you. I didn’t react the way I wanted to because I thought you didn’t like me and I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable.”

Your heart was beating so fast, you were sure he could hear you. All you could manage was a sheepish,

“Oh.”

One look at your face and Jiyong knew what he was going to do next. In one smooth movement, he lifted you onto his lap, making you straddle him. His fingers gently traced patterns on the soft skin of your thigh, exposed by the slit in your skirt. His other hand wrapped around your waist, he pulled you as close as he could and pressed his lips against your ear, gently murmuring,

“Do you want to know what I wanted to do to you that night?”

You nodded slowly.

“Well, Y/N.”

His fingers reached for the straps holding your top up.

“I wanted to undo that small knot holding your towel up and throw you on my bed. Oh and don’t even get me started about your braless stunt afterwards.”

His fingers undid the knots of the straps, letting your top fall to the ground, leaving you in a wine-red lace bra. His eyes darkened considerably, and you gulped seeing the lust in them, knowing fully well that your eyes looked the same. His hands ran across your back, making you arch against him.

“I wanted to make you scream my name. I wanted everyone to know exactly who was making you feel that way.”

His hands gently ran across your collar bones.

“I wanted to leave some marks against your pretty neck.”

His hands gently travelled down your body and grabbed your ass.

“I wanted to make you a moaning mess, so much so that you would barely be able to remember your own name.”

Feeling his erection, you rocked your hips against his, the feeling making you moan. His lips were pressed against your neck when he said,

“Yes, just like that.”

Looking straight into your eyes, he said,

“I wanted to fuck you so hard that you wouldn’t be able to walk.”

You let out another moan from just his words. You looked straight back into his yes and replied.

“Well then Jiyong. Do it.”

In a matter of seconds, he lifted you up in his arms and kissed you, a slow, teasing kiss. He walked towards your bedroom and dropped you down on the bed, taking a moment to pause and admire how beautiful you were. You were a little breathless when you said,

“Jiyong. Shirt off. Now.”

He smirked at you, but obliged. He climbed onto the bed over you, hands reaching behind you.

“Princess, I might have listened to you just now, but don’t get the wrong idea about who’s in charge here.”

Before you could roll your eyes and give him a snarky response, he unhooked your bra, pulled it off and swirled his tongue against your nipple. Your hands went to grip his hair, holding him there while you threw your head back, moaning his name. He looked up at you and smirked.

“See, I told you that you’d be moaning my name.”

And then shifted his attention to your other nipple. You were getting wetter and wetter, sure that your panties were soaked with how wet you were. He moved up to your neck, and sure enough, he began leaving small marks all across your neck. He leaned back for a second to admire his handiwork. You were flushed and panting. Your nipples were almost incredibly hard and your chest was covered with hickies. He kissed you, growling against your ear.

“Mine. All mine.”

You knelt on the bed with your hand on his belt, getting ready to make him feel a little better, but his hands gently grabbed your and held them away. His voice was teasing, but firm when he said,

“Did I say you could do that princess?”

He pushed you back as he slipped off your skirt.

“Tonight, I’m going to focus on you. It’s my way of apologising for making you feel jealous all those times.”

You were squirming, because every little touch of his took you too far, but he firmly pulled you legs apart and pulled off your panties. His fingers slowly ran over your clit while he watched the way you shivered from that. He brought his fingers to his lips and stared at them.

“So wet and all for me?”

You nodded, unable to take your eyes off him. Staring back at you with almost feverish intensity, he slowly licked his fingers and leaned in to kiss you. You could taste yourself on his lips, and that made you even more wet. He them made his way to your thighs, pausing to pepper them with light kisses and hickies. You were moaning.

“Jiyong please.”

His eyes teasing, he asked,

“Please what?”

You stared at him pleadingly. He smirked and sat,

“Say it.”

Your face red, you managed to whisper,

“Jiyong, will you please eat me out?”

His smirk deepened.

“As you wish princess.”

And he started. He gave a long, slow lick across your vulva before finding you clit. You were holding his head, pulling his hair as you moaned his name again. He licked around your clit, gently teasing till he reached the very edge of it, but never directly on it. By now, you were raising your hips, unable to sit still. You threw your head back and moaned out his name again. He paused for a second, only to give you a devilish smirk and say,

“Nope. Not loud enough.”

before diving back, this time giving your clit a long, firm lick. He then swirled his tongue around it before pressing down on it harshly and curling a finger into you. Without meaning to, your moans and screams became much louder, unable to contain yourself. He knew you were close from the way you were panting. Jiyong lightly nibbled on your clit before sucking on it, and with that, you came, shuddering a little as your breathing slowly steadied. He was about to get up when your hands ran across his chest, pulling you closer to him before you said,

“You said you were going to fuck me so hard I wouldn’t be able to walk.”

His face morphed into that same devilish smirk.

“My princess is so needy for me.”

Before you could reply, he reached for your clit and rubbed down on it, hard. You were already sensitive from your orgasm, so you could only moan as you fell onto him.

“Yes, Jiyong, I am needy for you.”

Still smirking, he reached for condoms in his drawers. You quickly undid his belt and removed his pants. He slid on a condom before pushing you down. He just pushed into you with no warning, making you gasp from the sudden change. Jiyong gave you a minute to adjust before he began moving, rough and fast. And hitting that one spot inside you without fail with every single thrust. You were already screaming when one of his hands reached down to play with your clit, making your screams even louder. Your nails dug into his back, leaving marks. His breathing was getting shallower and his thrusts unsteady. You were both glistening with sweat. He pulled out completely before pushing into you again, and with that, both of you came. He flopped down next to you, both of you tired. You turned and pulled him into a long, gentle kiss. He pulled away to smile and stroke your hair.

“I guess it’s a little late, but will you be my girlfriend?”

You laughed and nodded eagerly.

“I’d be only too happy to be your girlfriend.”

And you kissed him again. It was long and slow for a while, before things started heating up again. He pulled you onto him with a smirk.

“I guess it’s time for round two then.”

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omgreally · 4 years

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The Apprentice Read on AO3 Pairing: Din Djarin/F!Reader Rating: E for Explicit, Soon Wordcount: 9k+ Summary: Peli Motto took you off the streets of Tatooine to become one of the best apprentices she’s ever had - but honestly, the DUM droids are setting the bar pretty low. Still, you work out well for the first few months until an armored Mandalorian stranger lands with a busted-up ship and a strange magic baby and, well, you’re intrigued. Even though you know you shouldn’t be. Peli’s always teling you to keep away from anything hot but sometimes, to fix something, you have to stick your hand straight into the fire.

Chapter Three - Second Thoughts

You sit on the ground across from the blazing fire as the Treadwell droids fries the gorgs on the flame generated by the old podracing engine. The suns have long since slipped below the horizon, and the night sky is filled with stars like a dark blanket poked with holes and thrown over a lamp.

“You ever been offworld, Peli?” You wonder as you gaze upwards. You don’t think about it much, what’s up there - you’ve only ever been concerned with what’s down here and the more immediate need for survival. But the more time you spend on ships that soar back and forth between the stars, the more you wonder what it’s like.

“Space travel?” Peli snorts, ripping off a hunk of jerky for herself and handing a smaller piece to Grogu in her lap. “It’s a waste of time, kiddo. Keeps me in business, though, so I don’t complain. But the hotshots out there, zoomin’ around between planets, never feelin’ the dirt beneath their feet - they complain plenty. Makes me wonder why they do it.”

“What about him?” You nod towards the dark, silent Razor Crest. Mando hasn’t joined you yet. You’re beginning to doubt that he will.

“Who knows? Only thing he seems to care about is this little guy.” She jiggles Grogu on her knee.

“It’s...his child?” you ask slowly, almost afraid of the answer.

“Nah. Don’t think so, anyway. But he’s a part of his clan, so he’ll protect him, see? That’s how Mandalorians are.” She cocks her head. “I think. All I know is I’ve seen him kill without hesitation to protect this little one, and he’ll do anythin’ for him. Anythin’.” Peli emphasizes this with a pointed forefinger, one that Grogu grabs and starts to chew on. “Ow! Hungry little womprat, aren’tcha? Here, have some more o’ this.”

“That almost sounds...noble,” you muse aloud. Peli, only half-listening, chuckles.

“You try tellin’ him that. Hey, where are you goin’?”

“I told him I’d bring him some dinner,” you say as you get to your feet and fill a plate with meat, fruit and jerky.

“You like him, don’t you?”

You stop, half-turning to her in the flickering firelight. You expect to see a smirk, or a grimace, but Peli’s expression is just...curious. Grogu is looking at you too, and you wonder how much the little creature understands.

“He’s...interesting,” you say. “And attractive.” Why lie? Peli’s always been able to see straight through you.

The woman sighs, leaning back. “Just...be careful, Girl, won’t you? Believe it or not, I’ve gotten used to havin’ you around. And you’re a damn sight more useful than the droids.”

You shift from foot to foot. “What are you trying to say, ma’am?”

“I’m just sayin’...It’s like he’s got his own gravitational pull. Try not to fall into his orbit.” She strokes the ears of the child in her lap and presses her lips together into an expression of resignation when she meets your eyes.

She already knows. And she can see it in you.

Her smile is wry, and a little sad when she adds, "You’ll end up burnin’ up.”

You’re not sure what to say to that, so you say nothing. You walk away, deep in thought, your steps taking you slowly, inexorably towards the ship. Maybe there’s something to what Peli’s saying. It’s like you just can’t help yourself.

It’s like you don’t even want to.

The side ramp is still down, and you wonder briefly if the actuator has broken again - you’ll have to check tomorrow. The sound of your boots on the gangway seem unnaturally loud, but you knock on the frame of the hatch anyway to announce your presence, peering into the dim interior.

“Mando?”

No answer. You make your way further into the hold, but catch no sight of him. “Mando?” you call again.

This was a stupid idea, you decide. You’ll just leave the plate somewhere and go. You're in the middle of looking for an appropriate flat surface where he’ll find it when his voice drifts down from the cockpit - “Up here.”

There’s still time to just leave the food and go, you think. But of course, you don’t. You move further into the belly of the beast. Balancing the plate in one hand, you haul yourself up the ladder with the other. Somehow, you manage to get up to the cockpit without flinging food everywhere.

The bridge of the ship is even darker than before, the standby lights filling the space with an eerie, blinking glow. It makes the Mandalorian blend into the durasteel background, so that when he gets up from the pilot’s seat, you jump, nearly tripping backwards - but he’s on his feet and has caught the plate in one hand and your elbow in the other before you even register the movement.

“Sorry,” you mutter, staring into the visor. “I didn’t see you.”

“It’s okay,” he says, letting you go - you feel the absence of his touch more keenly than you might have if you'd gotten more time in the sanisteam earlier. You watch him as he perches on the edge of a control panel to examine the contents of his plate, gloved fingers picking through the jerky and crisped pieces of meat.

“It’s not much, but we were a little strapped for credits when I went to the market this morning,” you explain. “I’ll go out and get more tomorrow-”

“It’s fine. Thank you.” Still, he sets the plate aside, and you frown. If it’s fine, why isn’t he eating- Oh.

You turn, your face burning. “Sorry, I forgot. I’ll leave you to eat.” You step towards the hatch, and the ladder that leads to safety.

“Wait.”

The single word stops you in your tracks, and you stand there, frozen. You can’t hear him move, but you know that he’s behind you - you can feel the heat from his body and the coolness of the Beskar both warring for space at your back. You don’t turn around.

“Are you afraid of me?”

That’s definitely not what you expected him to ask. If you expected anything. You do turn now, slowly, coming face-to-face with his breastplate mere inches from your nose, and you have to tilt your chin up to look up at his visor. At the edge of the helmet, you can see the fabric of his cowl disappearing upward, and you wonder what color his hair is under there - if he has hair. It’s so hard to think of him as human, looking at the silver outer shell, and that more than anything else is terrifying. And exciting.

“Yes,” you say, your voice little more than a whisper.

He reaches out and touches a tendril of your hair, still damp from the sanisteam. He brushes it gently, ever-so-gently, over your cheek and tucks it back behind your ear. His knuckles linger by your temple. You’ve long since stopped breathing.

“Good,” he says then. “Fear keeps you smart. Keeps you from doing something stupid.”

It’s like he knows exactly what you’ve been thinking, every moment you’ve been alone together. You swallow heavily around the sudden lump in your throat, resisting the urge to grab onto something - maybe him - to keep yourself upright, centered.

“Like what?” you rasp instead, trying to moisten your lips with the tip of your tongue, but your mouth is too dry for that. The helmet tracks the movement.

“I don’t want to give you any ideas.”

“I already have a few,” you say, breathing in a chuckle. You feel detached, as if this conversation isn’t really happening. Not in your reality.

“How old are you?”

That question stops you for a moment, and you have to think. “Oh...Galactic calendar? Twenty, at least...twenty-something, maybe. I lost track for a few years.”

“Twenty.” You hear him breathe in through the modulator, and he reaches out, a gloved finger tracking the visible indent of your collarbone from the open V of your coveralls. “You’re smart, for someone so young.”

You’re pretty sure wanting to fuck a Mandalorian isn’t that smart, but you don’t voice that thought. Not yet, anyway.

“I’ve had to be,” you tell him, voice low, like you’re confessing a secret. “Out here, you don’t survive if you’re not smart.”

Mando nods slowly, seeming almost - understanding? Sympathetic? Maybe you’re imagining it. It’s too easy to ascribe emotions to the blankness of the Beskar. He could be making faces at you from behind that mask for all you know. He could just be toying with you to pass the time.

But something tells you that he’s not. And that scares you the most of all.

“I should go,” you say softly, and there’s a small moment of hesitation - just a second or two, but enough that you notice it - before he nods again.

You step back from him, towards the hatch, your eyes on the visor until the very last moment you turn around to swing yourself onto the ladder. You’re halfway down before his voice drifts to you.

“Goodnight, Girl.”

“Night, Mando,” you murmur, smiling to yourself as you climb down the rest of the way.

There’s a spring in your step as you leave the Razor Crest behind, one that Peli doesn’t miss as you pass her on the way to your room.

“Remember what I told you, Girl!” she calls after you. You wave a dismissive, slightly rude offworlder gesture in her direction, but not too obviously.

“Goodnight, Peli!”

“See you’re up with the suns tomorrow! We got a lot of work to do!” she yells, but you’re already gone, shutting the door behind you as you head inside.

You debate going for another shower, but Peli will tell you off for using all the water, so you go to bed instead. You say ‘bed’ - really it’s just a cot shoved into a corner in one of the storage rooms, housed between crates of spare parts. You don’t mind it. The smell of metal and lubricant has long since ceased being an unpleasant one, and it’s of particular comfort tonight

You try to sleep imagining it’s Beskar surrounding you, smooth and cool beneath your fingers. You picture a pair of gloved hands on your shoulders, your arms, your belly, and your skin warms to your own touch. Your hands aren’t as wide, your fingers not as long, but in the absence of any others, they do the job.

You come gasping into the gloom, picturing the inscrutable darkness of a T-shaped visor boring into you. And then you sleep, only half-sated, somehow more restless than ever.

You get the feeling things are only going to get worse before they get better.

Taglist: @annon123456789987654321, @babe-im-bi, @casssiopeia, @herefortheart, @shannaniganss, @sofithewitch

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#the mandalorian fanfic #din djarin/reader #din djarin x female reader #mando x you #the apprentice

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bloody-bee-tea · 4 years

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ninjalibrarianbookworm hat auf deinen Eintrag geantwortet “Au where Jiang Fengmian destroyed half of Jiang Cheng's core when he...”

Better yet, he seals part of it so JC can always feel the power just beyond his fingertips

Have 9k for this, which you can also read here on AO3. I know how the first part reads, but I promise there is no sexual abuse going on, though of course the child abuse is inevitable with that prompt. There’s implied character death through straight up murder at the end, so consider this your warning.

The situation at home is still tense. Jiang Cheng doesn’t understand all of it, but his mother is still not talking to Wei Wuxian and only yelling at his father, and Wei Wuxian is shy and scared around both Jiang Cheng and his mother.

Jiang Cheng thought they made up after the night incident where both of them got hurt, but maybe he was wrong about that.

Maybe Wei Wuxian is still mad at him.

“Why are you frowning like this?” his father suddenly says, having come onto the pier without Jiang Cheng noticing. “What did you do?”

“Nothing, A-die,” Jiang Cheng rushes out as he scrambles to get to his feet. “I was just thinking. I think Wei Wuxian is still—,” he trails off before he can say anything more, because they all agreed to not tell their parents. “Still scared of the dogs,” Jiang Cheng finishes weakly and his father sends him a sharp look, clearly knowing that this isn’t what Jiang Cheng originally wanted to say.

“Of course A-Xian is still scared,” his father says and Jiang Cheng hangs his head at his words. “And I am still very disappointed in you.”

“Oh,” Jiang Cheng breathes out, because that stings even more than the prospect of his new brother forever being scared of Jiang Cheng.

“Do you want to make it up to me?” his father suddenly asks and Jiang Cheng eagerly looks up at him. “Do you want to do something that would make me proud of you again?”

“Of course, A-die,” Jiang Cheng says immediately, because he wants to do nothing more.

He doesn’t want his father to be disappointed with him.

“Alright,” Jiang Fengmian says and Jiang Cheng likes to think there’s a small smile playing around his mouth. “I’ll come by your room this evening. Do not tell anyone else about this or I will be even more disappointed in you.”

“I won’t, A-die,” Jiang Cheng whispers, his head bowed as his father walks away from him.

The prospect of disappointing his father is terrifying to Jiang Cheng but he’s also excited. His father is giving him another chance! Jiang Cheng gets to make up for his mistake!

He’s excited through the whole day; excited enough that Jiang Yanli even asks him to calm down, but Jiang Cheng doesn’t break his promise. He stays quiet and doesn’t tell a single soul that his father is giving him another chance.

They will all know soon enough when he will praise Jiang Cheng again, after all!

His father let’s Jiang Cheng stew for a long while in the evening, long enough that Jiang Cheng thinks maybe he isn’t coming at all, but he’s still sitting on his bed, prim and proper, waiting for him.

And his father does show up, when Jiang Cheng has already been awake for longer than he ever has been before.

He was just about to fall asleep, but as soon as he hears his father enter, Jiang Cheng is wide awake again, excited to make his father proud of him.

“A-die,” he says, keeping his voice low because he knows he isn’t allowed to draw attention to them.

“Do you still want to make me proud?” his father asks him again and Jiang Cheng nods several times.

There is nothing he wants more.

“Alright. This will hurt a bit, but if you can manage without crying out, I will be so proud of you,” Jiang Fengmian tells him and Jiang Cheng swallows heavily.

He doesn’t deal well with pain—some kids in the market call him a cry-baby—but for his A-die he will manage.

Jiang Cheng nods once at his father, who puts a hand to his wrist.

“Close your eyes,” he instructs him and Jiang Cheng does has he’s told.

He doesn’t understand what his father is doing, simply tries to be as still as possible, but it gets hard when the first spike of pain laces through him.

Jiang Cheng clenches his teeth together, but soon enough the pain is so acute, he can barely endure it.

“A-die,” Jiang Cheng chokes out, because it hurts, but his father shushes him and simply goes on with whatever it is he’s doing.

There are tears streaming down Jiang Cheng’s face and he tastes blood where he’s biting his lip, and the last thought he has before he loses consciousness is that at least he didn’t scream out loud and disappointed his father even more.

~*~*~

When Jiang Cheng wakes up, he feels bruised all over. He groans when he tries to sit up, and the sound brings his sister to his bed.

“A-Cheng,” she breathes out and Jiang Cheng tries to give her a small smile, but everything hurts so much.

“A-Cheng, you scared us,” Jiang Yanli says and Jiang Cheng leans into her hand on his cheek.

“What happened?” he wants to know and is surprised how scratchy his voice comes out.

“You wouldn’t wake up for the last few days,” Jiang Yanli tells him and Jiang Cheng frowns.

“Was I sick?” he asks and Jiang Yanli nods.

“You must have been,” she gives back and then smiles at him again. “I’m so glad you’re awake again. I made some soup, I’ll bring it to you.”

“Where’s A-die?” Jiang Cheng asks, because he thinks that’s a safe enough question.

“I think he’s out training with A-Xian. He has to catch up a lot of training,” Jiang Yanli tells him and Jiang Cheng’s heart falls.

“Oh, I see,” he whispers and then watches as Jiang Yanli leaves his room.

It’s not long before Yu Ziyuan comes into his room and Jiang Cheng shrinks into his bed.

His mother doesn’t look happy.

“A-niang,” he greets her and is surprised when she briefly puts her hand on his head.

“You’ve been laying around enough, now,” she scolds him, but she doesn’t sound as fierce as she normally does and Jiang Cheng wonders if maybe she was worried about him.

It’s a nice thought.

“Okay,” he agrees and tries to get out of the bed immediately.

He still aches all over, but he endured the pain to make his father proud, so he can now endure it to make his mother proud.

“Your sister made you some soup, don’t be ungrateful and let it go to waste,” his mother chides him and pushes him back into bed, more gently than she ever has been before.

Jiang Cheng gratefully sinks back into his bedding, but he’s confused by his mother’s actions. Didn’t she just scold him for being too lazy? And now she wants him to stay here?

Jiang Cheng lost that train of thought when Jiang Yanli comes back, his favourite soup in her hands and his stomach grumbles in protest.

He really is famished.

The soup his sister made him is the single best thing Jiang Cheng has ever eaten and shortly after he is done he falls back asleep, belly full with the warm soup.

It is shortly before dinner that he wakes up again, and he makes his way out of his room, careful and slow, because he still hurts all over and something inside of him feels off, though he can’t put his finger on it.

Still, he makes his way through Lotus Pier, eager to see his father, to see if he did well, if he is proud of Jiang Cheng now, and his feet carry him to the training field.

He finds his father with Wei Wuxian there, who is holding a sword in his hands and who is going through a series of movements.

Jiang Cheng comes to a stop at the side-line, taking in the scene in front of him. His father is smiling at Wei Wuxian, following his every movement, and when Wei Wuxian is done, Jiang Fengmian claps his hands together.

“You did so well, A-Xian, I am so proud of you! You are really gifted!” he exclaims and Jiang Cheng feels the jealousy rise inside of him but he pushes it down.

His father just hasn’t seen him yet. Surely, he will be proud of Jiang Cheng as well now.

“A-die,” Jiang Cheng calls out, and his father finally turns to look at Jiang Cheng.

Jiang Cheng shrinks back when he sees the smile glide off his father’s face and Jiang Cheng tries to make himself small when he comes over to him.

“Jiang Cheng,” his father greets him and his voice holds none of the warmth it just did when he talked to Wei Wuxian. “You’re up.”

Jiang Cheng can’t find his voice so he simply nods, trying to hold still under his father’s gaze.

“It took you longer than expected,” Jiang Fengmian says and in that moment Jiang Cheng knows that he failed his father.

He didn’t make him proud.

“I’m sorry,” Jiang Cheng whispers, biting back the tears that threaten to fall, but it seems like his father still notices them, because he lets out a sigh.

“Don’t cry,” he chides him. “You did enough of that already.”

“Yes, A-die,” Jiang Cheng mumbles, bowing his head.

Whatever his father wanted him to do, Jiang Cheng failed. He failed yet again, and the pain was probably because of that. His father had said it was supposed to hurt a little. The pain Jiang Cheng felt now was most likely because he yet again disappointed his father by being unable.

“I will try my best in the future,” Jiang Cheng promises him, but his chest hurts when his father simply turns away from him.

All Jiang Cheng wanted was to make his father proud of him, and he didn’t even manage that. He probably deserves the pain.

~*~*~

Jiang Cheng fights the urge to throw his sword to the ground. He lost yet again against Wei Wuxian and it makes an ugly emotion rear its head inside of Jiang Cheng.

He knows he can be better; should be better, really. Jiang Cheng knows he has the potential—it’s all right there, he can feel it—but he can’t access it, doesn’t know how to.

Jiang Cheng’s power is just out of his grasp and it makes him angry; with himself, mostly, but also with Wei Wuxian, because he doesn’t seem to have any problems accessing the potential inside of him.

“Jiang Cheng,” his father calls out, and just by the tone of his voice Jiang Cheng can tell how disappointed he is with him. “You should be better at this,” Jiang Fengmian chides him.

“I know, A-die,” Jiang Cheng gives back, head bowed and hand gripping the hilt of his sword tightly.

“Look at A-Xian,” his father instructs him. “He has no problems grasping this concept, and he had a late start with his golden core. You’re embarrassing me, if you can’t even understand how to channel your qi properly.”

Jiang Cheng grits his teeth; it’s not that he doesn’t understand how to do it, it’s just that he can’t channel all the qi he feels inside of him. He is just about to tell his father that when he lifts his head again and sees how Jiang Fengmian puts a hand on Wei Wuxian’s shoulder, smiling down at him.

“I’m very proud of you, A-Xian,” Jiang Fengmian tells the other boy, and Wei Wuxian smiles and nods, before he looks over at Jiang Cheng and the smile slides right off his face.

“Jiang Cheng,” Wei Wuxian says but Jiang Cheng doesn’t want to hear this.

He will never be as good as Wei Wuxian; his father will never be proud of him.

He should just learn to accept that.

~*~*~

“I can’t believe you call yourself an heir,” Jin Zixun sneers. “When you can’t even beat a street rat.”

“You shut your mouth,” Wei Wuxian yells at him, ready to go over and fight him it seems, but Jiang Cheng only grits his teeth.

Jin Zixun is right after all. Jiang Cheng continues to fail on every level, even though he should be so much better than Wei Wuxian. But he is still too stupid to access most of his golden core and it makes Jiang Cheng so damn angry.

Mostly at himself, but Wei Wuxian usually gets a good heap of that anger as well, but today Jiang Cheng is simply too embarrassed.

Everyone came to watch them spar; even Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren are there at the side-lines and watched how Jiang Cheng failed yet again.

Jiang Cheng throws his sword down and storms off, Wei Wuxian’s and Jiang Yanli’s calls going ignored.

He holes himself up in his room, biting back bitter tears as he tries yet again to access his qi only to fail like he always did before.

Jiang Cheng doesn’t understand; his potential is right there, he can feel it. But he can never touch it, can never access it and it makes him wonder what’s wrong with him, that even his own body rebels against him like this.

He is being brought out of his thoughts when someone knocks at his door.

“What?” he snaps out and then scrambles to his feet when Lan Xichen enters his room.

“Zewu-Jun,” Jiang Cheng rushes out as he falls into the appropriate bow but Lan Xichen simply smiles at him.

“My uncle requested to see you. If you would allow me to accompany you,” Lan Xichen tells him and dread pools in Jiang Cheng’s stomach.

It’s been a week; he can’t believe he already fucked up enough to be summoned by Lan Qiren.

“I see,” Jiang Cheng mutters and follows after Lan Xichen.

Jiang Cheng’s mind is racing, trying to figure out just what exactly he did wrong to warrant this, but he always comes back to the training session this afternoon.

He was a sore loser, he knows it, and it’s probably against a rule to be displeased by a fair loss. Jiang Cheng wonders what punishment awaits him for that, but before he can manage to recall the long list Lan Qiren had them memorize, Lan Xichen enters a house.

Lan Qiren is already waiting for them.

“Elder Qiren,” Jiang Cheng greets him with the appropriate bow and Lan Qiren points for him to sit.

“Do you know why I summoned you here today?” Lan Qiren asks, and Jiang Cheng stiffens, already expecting the worst.

“I presume I broke a rule,” he eventually mumbles and frowns in surprise when Lan Qiren shakes his head at that.

“You didn’t,” Lan Qiren informs him as he is stroking his beard. “In fact you seem to be doing rather well in class,” he goes on. “You’re not the best in class, but you’re studious and hard-working.”

Jiang Cheng is just about to shake his head at that—it’s not true, he’s barely able to follow along especially the more practical lessons—when Lan Qiren leans slightly forward.

“So help me understand why you seem so frustrated with your progress.”

Jiang Cheng blinks at him and then he quickly turns his head away.

“I am not,” Jiang Cheng lies straight through his teeth. “I am very grateful for everything you have been teaching us.”

“I don’t doubt that,” Lan Qiren gives back and Jiang Cheng frowns at him. “But you were among the best during the training fights today and yet you stormed off enraged. Explain to me why.”

Jiang Cheng fists his hands in his robes, stubbornly keeping his mouth shut, but it seems like Lan Qiren is more than used to sitting in silence, because he easily waits Jiang Cheng out. In the end, it’s Jiang Cheng who breaks first.

“I just can’t—,” Jiang Cheng starts but then breaks off, hating how whiny he sounds. “It’s right here,” he finally goes on, slapping a hand to his lower belly where his golden core is, “I know that all the power I would need to excel is right there, but it’s always just out of grasp.”

Jiang Cheng is breathing harshly and he struggles to find the next words, but Lan Qiren gives him time to figure it out without interrupting.

“I know I can be better than Wei Wuxian,” Jiang Cheng admits, something he has never said out loud before. “I can feel it, all that potential in my core, but I don’t know how to access it. Whenever I ask my father he tells me not to be stupid, that I’m already at my capacity, but I know there is more. There’s more, right here, and yet I am unable to make use of it,” Jiang Cheng finishes desperately.

His words are met with silence and when he looks up he finds Lan Qiren frowning at him.

“So your angry outbursts—,” he prompts and Jiang Cheng looks down, ashamed by his own actions and with how little he has himself under control.

It’s no wonder his father is disappointed with him.

“Are because I know I can be better and yet I never am,” Jiang Cheng finishes lowly and avoids eye contact.

He still sees how Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen exchange a look and Jiang Cheng stiffens when Lan Xichen gets up.

“Jiang Cheng, would you mind if I have a look at your core?” Lan Xichen softly asks him and Jiang Cheng quickly ducks his head.

His father repeatedly told him not to let strangers look at his core. No one has any business meddling with the cores of others, his father always said.

“I wouldn’t want to bother you, Zewu-jun,” Jiang Cheng politely says. “There’s no need to concern yourself with me. I am simply not good enough,” he says, even though he almost chokes on those words.

Jiang Cheng wishes it was different; that for once in his life he was good enough, but it’s not in his power to change things.

“But I am concerned,” Lan Xichen easily gives back. “So please, may I?” he asks again and this time Jiang Cheng nods.

It’s really not polite to refuse a Sect Leader.

Lan Xichen doesn’t waste any time and simply reaches out for Jiang Cheng’s wrist, a concentrated look on his face. Jiang Cheng can feel his gentle energy probing at his core and he forces himself to relax. Lan Xichen doesn’t mean any harm, after all.

It’s not long, before Lan Xichen gasps and lets go of Jiang Cheng’s wrist as if it had burned him, his energy retreating all at once, leaving Jiang Cheng reeling just the slightest bit.

“Xichen?” Lan Qiren asks, clearly concerned for his nephew and Lan Xichen turns towards him, paler than Jiang Cheng had ever seen him.

“Uncle, you should see for yourself,” Lan Xichen mumbles and Jiang Cheng has to fight the urge to run away.

“What’s wrong?” Jiang Cheng wants to know, his voice unsure and shaky, but when Lan Xichen doesn’t answer, Lan Qiren motions for him to come closer to him.

“Come here. Let me have a look.”

Jiang Cheng hesitates, looking back at Lan Xichen, but when Lan Xichen nods encouragingly at him, he slowly gets to his feet and goes over to Lan Qiren, where he kneels again, offering his wrist.

Jiang Cheng doesn’t know what Lan Xichen found wrong with his core, but a tiny voice inside of him mumbles that he’s probably lacking more than he was ever aware before. Jiang Cheng wonders if Lan Qiren will throw him out of classes when he realizes just how little of his power Jiang Cheng is able to use.

His thoughts are disturbed when Lan Qiren takes his wrist in his hand and soon enough Jiang Cheng can feel his energy sliding against his core. He’s not as gentle or calm as Lan Xichen’s energy had been, but Jiang Cheng forces himself to sit still.

It doesn’t take long at all before Lan Qiren pales as well and he wrenches his hand away from Jiang Cheng’s wrist just like Lan Xichen did.

“How dare he,” Lan Qiren mumbles but Jiang Cheng’s head is already spinning too much to pay attention to his words.

It must be worse than Jiang Cheng feared.

“What—,” Jiang Cheng starts but his voice breaks before he can even finish the question, and he is too embarrassed to try again.

“You are right,” Lan Qiren quietly tells him, after Lan Xichen puts a steadying hand on his shoulder. “Your core is strong and well developed, but you’re using less than half of the potential you have. Your potential is almost endless; you certainly have more than Wei Wuxian, and maybe even more than Wangji has.”

“I see,” Jiang Cheng whispers as those words hit him.

So he could be better if only he tried harder, Jiang Cheng thinks, and the thought is accompanied by the now so familiar frustration.

“But it’s not your fault that you can’t access your full potential,” Lan Qiren goes on and when his face goes hard Jiang Cheng flinches back. “Part of your core has been sealed.”

That makes Jiang Cheng freeze.

“What?” he whispers as panic bubbles up inside of him. “Sealed?”

“Yes. It will take a while to undo the spell, but it is possible,” Lan Qiren reassures him. “We’ll start working on it as soon as possible,” Lan Qiren declares, but Jiang Cheng is still stuck on the sealed part, so he shakes his head.

“Who would do something like that?” he mutters and watches as Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen exchange a look that makes Jiang Cheng go cold all over.

“Jiang Cheng,” Lan Xichen hesitantly starts and Jiang Cheng turns to look at him.

“You know who did it, right? Tell me,” he demands but he is only met with silence.

They know who did it and Jiang Cheng will not accept anything but the truth.

But you already know, a tiny voice inside of him whispers and Jiang Cheng squashes it down. It can’t be true. He wouldn’t.

“You know who did it, so you have to tell me. Lying is forbidden in the Cloud Recesses,” he tries when the silence drags on, and he watches a reluctant smile appear on Lan Qiren’s face.

“That is one of our rules,” he agrees but he is still not giving Jiang Cheng an answer.

“If we don’t say anything at all, it’s not lying,” Lan Xichen says with a grimace and Jiang Cheng feels almost panicked at that.

“No. You have to tell me! It’s my core, I deserve to know who did this to me!” he almost yells, and he knows this is serious when Lan Qiren doesn’t reprimand him for his raised voice.

“Even if it would cause you more harm than good?” Lan Qiren wants to know and Jiang Cheng clenches his fist on his thighs.

“Yes,” Jiang Cheng presses out and then he holds Lan Qiren’s eyes, to let him know that he will not let this rest until he knows the truth.

“It was your father,” Lan Qiren tells him eventually and keeps his careful gaze on Jiang Cheng as the meaning of those words make their way into Jiang Cheng’s heart.

“What? No,” Jiang Cheng breathes out, and his face crumbles with those words. “He wouldn’t do that,” Jiang Cheng tries even though he knows Lan Qiren has no reason to lie to him about this.

“I am afraid the energy signature on the seal is unmistakable,” Lan Qiren says, much softer than Jiang Cheng has ever heard him before and he reaches out for Jiang Cheng’s wrist again, this time to simply hold it. “I am sorry.”

“He wouldn’t do that,” Jiang Cheng repeats, tries to convince himself more than anything, but in his heart he knows it’s the truth.

He knows.

“Jiang Cheng,” Lan Xichen starts again, and breaks Jiang Cheng out of his shock.

Jiang Cheng rather wishes it didn’t because his eyes immediately fill with tears, much to the horror of Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren it seems.

“I always knew he favoured Wei Wuxian,” Jiang Cheng chokes out and his voice breaks halfway through, but Jiang Cheng forces himself to go on. “I just never thought he would go this far,” he finishes weakly, because Jiang Cheng always thought his father was passive and indifferent towards him.

But this was a direct action, one that could be argued to speak of hate, and it hurt worse than anything Jiang Cheng can remember feeling.

“Oh,” he breathes out as the memory of that night comes back to him.

His father must have done it then; it would explain why Jiang Cheng had felt so unsettled for a long while after.

“I was a child,” Jiang Cheng mumbles, his voice shaking so hard he’s afraid they won’t even understand him. “I was a child and he still did this to me!”

“It’s not permanent,” Lan Xichen tries to reassure him, though he seems to want to cry too. “We can undo it. We will undo it.”

Jiang Cheng doesn’t even spare him a glance, because it doesn’t change a thing but before Jiang Cheng can say so, Lan Qiren pulls him into a hug.

“We will undo it,” he promises Jiang Cheng who has gone stiff against him, not knowing how to handle this hug.

“What does it matter?” Jiang Cheng says after a moment, voice muffled by Lan Qiren’s robes, even though he finally allows himself to relax against him. “It won’t undo what he did. It won’t undo the fact that he doesn’t love me at all,” Jiang Cheng chokes out, his tears finally spilling over and he clings to Lan Qiren when sobs wreck his body too.

“We’ll make sure you can access your full potential,” Lan Qiren promises him and even though it’s a meagre offering compared to what Jiang Cheng lost in this moment, he appreciates the sentiment, if nothing else.

~*~*~

Jiang Cheng doesn’t remember much after the reveal that his father sealed off most of his core. He doesn’t even know how he got back to his rooms, but he guesses Lan Xichen must have brought him and made sure he was sitting on his bed before he left again.

When Wei Wuxian and Jiang Yanli come back what feels like hours later Jiang Cheng is still sitting on his bed, body frozen while his mind is spinning.

His father did this to him. His father willingly and knowingly stunted his growth and Jiang Cheng feels hollowed out by that knowledge. He’s hurting all over with that knowledge, just like in that night his father must have done it.

He can guess why his father would do it, and that hurts even more. Jiang Cheng has always known that his father loved Wei Wuxian more than he loved him, but this is even beyond anything Jiang Cheng ever expected.

“A-Cheng?” Jiang Yanli asks when he doesn’t react to them at all, but it’s only when Wei Wuxian sits down next to him and throws his arm over Jiang Cheng’s shoulder that he gets up.

“Don’t touch me,” Jiang Cheng hisses and he lets out a bitter laugh when Wei Wuxian stares in confusion at him. “It’s all your fault,” Jiang Cheng says through clenched teeth even though deep down he knows that it’s not.

Wei Wuxian didn’t seal his core. That was all his father.

“What is going on? What is my fault?” Wei Wuxian asks, but the smile slides off his face at the venom in Jiang Cheng’s voice.

“A-Cheng, what happened?” Jiang Yanli gently asks, clearly confused by his behaviour, and Jiang Cheng whirls around to her.

“Did you know? Did you let him do it?” he demands to know, even though a part inside of him yells to stop.

His sister is hardly at fault here. He already lost part of his family today; he shouldn’t anger those that are left.

“Let who do what?” Wei Wuxian asks as he comes to stand protectively between Jiang Yanli and Jiang Cheng and Jiang Cheng turns his anger and hurt at him.

“I bet you helped him. It probably was your idea to do it and I fucking hate you, too!” Jiang Cheng yells as the tears finally spill over again and he sinks to the floor in a helpless heap.

“A-Cheng,” Jiang Yanli whispers and she moves forward to Jiang Cheng’s side, pulling him into a hug without caring that he struggles, tucking his face into her neck.

His sister was always stronger than people knew.

“Who did what?” she wants to know once Jiang Cheng settled down a little bit and Jiang Cheng moves away from her though he can’t look at either of his siblings as he searches for his words.

“Father, he—,” Jiang Cheng starts and then suddenly finds it too hard to actually say it.

If he tells his siblings about it, it will be real; much more real than it had been just a few moments ago and Jiang Cheng can’t bring himself to do it.

“If you would allow me,” Lan Xichen suddenly says from the doorway and Jiang Yanli and Wei Wuxian whirl around to him. “I came to check on Jiang Wanyin,” he explains and steps into the room.

“I can explain if you find it too hard yourself,” Lan Xichen says again, his gaze fixed upon Jiang Cheng, who simply nods, too tired to care that this should be family business.

If he doesn’t have to be the one to say it, maybe it won’t hurt as much this time around.

“Jiang Fengmian sealed part of Jiang Wanyin’s core. He denied him access to at least half the potential Jiang Wanyin has.”

Jiang Cheng is looking at the floor, so he only hears Jiang Yanli’s surprised gasp and Wei Wuxian’s telling silence.

Wei Wuxian is always quiet when he’s angry.

“How do you know?” Wei Wuxian asks, voice low and controlled, no hint of the usual smile in it and Jiang Cheng finally looks up again.

His sister is paler than usual and Wei Wuxian is clenching his fists at his sides.

“It doesn’t matter why, but Lan Qiren and Lan Xichen checked out my core. They found the seal,” Jiang Cheng forces himself to say and he is too numb to feel anything.

“What do I look for?” Wei Wuxian asks, taking a step towards Jiang Cheng, clearly intent on checking for himself and Jiang Cheng can do nothing more than offer his wrist. He is too tired to stop him, too tired to fight against him.

“Young master Wei,” Lan Xichen tries, but when Wei Wuxian only glares at him, he offers his own wrist. “You need a comparison if you don’t know what you are looking for,” Lan Xichen explains and Wei Wuxian begrudgingly takes his wrist.

“Find my core,” Lan Xichen guides him. “Notice how all parts of it are in sync and can be accessed not only by me, but also by you.”

“Yes,” Wei Wuxian says, a concentrated frown on his face as he follows Lan Xichen’s instructions.

“You will find a barrier in Jiang Wanyin’s core. If you are familiar with Jiang Fengmian’s energy, you will notice his signature on it as well.”

Wei Wuxian glares at him as if he doesn’t believe a word he’s saying, but he takes Jiang Cheng’s offered wrist with the same concentrated look on his face.

It doesn’t take long before he goes pale and his eyes fly open.

Jiang Cheng fights the urge to laugh, because he feels stuck in a loop, but he knows it’s the pure desperation speaking.

“Jiang Cheng,” Wei Wuxian whispers and the horror in his voice tells Jiang Cheng that he indeed found the barrier and that he also recognised the power.

Since Jiang Cheng can’t feel the barrier himself, a tiny part of Jiang Cheng still hoped that Lan Xichen and Lan Qiren lied to him, but seeing the same horror on Wei Wuxian’s face now makes it all too real. Jiang Fengmian really did this to Jiang Cheng.

Jiang Yanli steps up to Lan Xichen next, who willingly offers his wrist again, and it isn’t long at all before his sister also takes Jiang Cheng’s wrist.

She seems to come to the same conclusion as Wei Wuxian, because a hand flies to her mouth and tears gather in her eyes.

“Oh, A-Cheng,” she breathes out and then pulls Jiang Cheng into a hug again.

“Why would he do that?” Jiang Cheng chokes out, all his emotions crashing into him now that his sister is hugging him, and he fists his hands into her robes, holding on for dear life. “How could he do that to me?”

“It’s my fault, isn’t it?” Wei Wuxian whispers and Jiang Cheng stiffens when Jiang Yanli shakes her head.

“Don’t be stupid,” she says through her own tears. “This one is solely on Jiang Fengmian.”

Jiang Cheng relaxes again, because she seems so sure of it and it eases something in Jiang Cheng. Wei Wuxian would never ask for something like this, and he also wouldn’t help Jiang Fengmian, but Jiang Cheng’s whole world just crumbled in on itself so it was easy to think that. But hearing it from his sister, that Wei Wuxian would never help with something like this, eases that fear in Jiang Cheng.

“Can it be undone?” Wei Wuxian asks Lan Xichen and Jiang Cheng can feel the tension in Jiang Yanli at the question.

“Yes,” Lan Xichen answers. “My uncle is preparing for it as we speak. He’ll have to undo the layers carefully, so it will probably take several days, but it can be done. It would be quicker and easier if the caster would undo it, but to be honest—”

“Jiang Fengmian is not going to touch A-Cheng again,” Jiang Yanli cuts him off and her arms around him tighten. “We can’t trust him to undo it without causing further harm. He will not do it.”

“My uncle thought the same,” Lan Xichen softly says. “I will come back later, if that is okay. You’re welcome to accompany Jiang Wanyin, if he wishes you to.”

“A-Cheng?” Jiang Yanli asks him and Jiang Cheng hides his face further in her robes.

“Yes,” he still gets out and that seems to be enough for Lan Xichen, because he can hear him leave.

It’s not long before Wei Wuxian plasters himself to Jiang Cheng’s back.

“I am so sorry, Jiang Cheng,” he whispers into Jiang Cheng’s hair, but Jiang Cheng shakes his head.

“You didn’t do it,” he gives back, the tears spilling over again. “It’s him, it’s all him.”

Jiang Cheng used to blame Wei Wuxian for a lot of things in the past, he knows that, but with this new knowledge he knows that it will be time he starts to accept that most of these things are the fault of his father. Wei Wuxian didn’t get a choice in this as much as Jiang Cheng didn’t have one.

The only difference is that Wei Wuxian didn’t have to be violated to make Jiang Fengmian happy. Jiang Cheng steadfastly refuses to think about the fact that not even this could endear him to his father.

“I hate him,” Jiang Cheng chokes out and his siblings just hug him all the harder. “I really hate him. How could he do this to me?”

“I don’t know,” Jiang Yanli whispers as she puts her cheek on Jiang Cheng’s head. “But we’re going to make it right,” she promises.

Jiang Cheng doesn’t know how anyone can make it right, but he believes her anyway.

~*~*~

Undoing the seal is mostly boring for Jiang Cheng. He has to sit still while Lan Qiren sits in front of him, Jiang Cheng’s wrists in his hands, a look of concentration on his face.

Jiang Cheng doesn’t feel any different when Lan Qiren finally opens his eyes again and neither does his core.

“It will take at least two more sessions,” Lan Qiren informs him and then frowns. “And I think for the last one we need to be alone. You don’t know how to handle the full potential of your core. It could be dangerous.”

“But there are no lasting effects?” Wei Wuxian pipes up from the side and Lan Qiren narrows his eyes at him.

“I would inform him if there were,” he courtly tells Wei Wuxian and then turns back to Jiang Cheng with a sigh when Wei Wuxian stares him down.

“There are no lasting effects,” Lan Qiren promises him and Jiang Cheng almost has to bite back a smile at the exasperation on his face.

“What about Jiang Fengmian?” Jiang Yanli wants to know and Jiang Cheng’s heart stumbles in his chest.

Since the revelation of what their father did, Jiang Yanli has not once referred to him as father.

“I already called on the council,” Lan Qiren tells her. “We checked the records and from what we can tell the appropriate punishment is to seal his core in turn.”

“Partially?” Wei Wuxian asks and just by the tone of his voice Jiang Cheng can tell what he thinks about that.

Jiang Cheng is glad he allowed his siblings to come to this. They are asking the questions Jiang Cheng knows he wouldn’t be able to bring himself to ask.

“No,” Lan Qiren says as he strokes his beard again. “To be honest, it doesn’t specify, but what he did was despicable, especially since he did it to a young child, and only the full sealing of his core can be accepted as punishment.”

Jiang Cheng is surprised to hear that Lan Qiren would condone that, but then again in the past few hours Lan Qiren has shown more emotion than Jiang Cheng is used to from him. Maybe he just really hates what Jiang Fengmian did to Jiang Cheng.

“Who would do it?” Wei Wuxian asks next and Lan Qiren looks at Jiang Cheng, because of course.

“No,” Jiang Cheng chokes out. “I don’t want to touch him. I don’t even want to have to look at him,” he tells them, panic threatening to overwhelm him, and Lan Qiren nods in understanding.

“You will have to, though,” he says apologetically. “I have already called upon your parents. They will be here tomorrow.”

“What?” Jiang Cheng whispers, because he’s not ready to see his father.

“We have to do this before I undo the seal. There has to be proof,” Lan Qiren explains. “Usually this would be a case to be brought in front of the Chief Cultivator, since it affected a Sect Heir. But an argument can be made that this is a family matter, so I only called on your parents.”

It makes sense, Jiang Cheng knows that it does, but it doesn’t make this any easier. He doesn’t want to be anywhere near Jiang Fengmian, less alone in the same room as him and he thought he would have more time.

Instead of arguing with Lan Qiren Jiang Cheng gets up and simply flees the room. It’s the politest thing he can do right now.

It’s not long before Wei Wuxian follows after him, catching him even before Jiang Cheng has made his mind up about where to go and Jiang Cheng wants to do nothing more than curl up into a small ball and be left alone.

“Jiang Cheng, there has to be justice,” Wei Wuxian says and then shakes his head at his own words. “He has to pay for what he did.”

“Why do you care?” Jiang Cheng snaps out. “You should be happy about what he did. It was all in your favour after all.”

Jiang Cheng regrets the words as soon as they are out of his mouth, and Wei Wuxian seems to know that because he gives him a small, sad smile.

“How could I ever be happy about this. He crippled you, Jiang Cheng. Yes, I love to compete and I love to win, but only if it’s in a fair competition. Not like this, never like this. If you’re better than me I am happy to accept that, as long as it’s in a fair fight, you should know that.”

“I do,” Jiang Cheng whispers and then hugs Wei Wuxian to underline his point. “It didn’t make your life easier,” he mutters and Wei Wuxian sighs.

“It didn’t,” Wei Wuxian agrees as he slings his arms around Jiang Cheng. “But this isn’t about me at all, Jiang Cheng. This is about what he did to you and you deserve justice for that. Can you even imagine how furious Madam Yu will be about this?”

A shudder goes through Jiang Cheng at that. His mother is going to kill his father where he stands, he is sure of that.

“Let’s see what tomorrow brings, okay? And you don’t have to face him alone, after all. Shijie and I will be right there with you,” Wei Wuxian says and gently pushes him away. “And once you have full control of your core I’m eager to have a fight with you.”

“You’re an idiot,” Jiang Cheng gives back, but his eyes are burning with tears and he roughly scrubs a hand over them.

He’s glad he has his siblings.

~*~*~

Jiang Cheng can’t bear to look at his father. There is hate curling in his gut, hot and heavy, and he’s afraid he’s going to do something reckless and dumb if he even so much as catches sight of him.

Instead he keeps his eyes on his mother, who clearly has no idea yet what’s going on and who is already glaring daggers at Wei Wuxian, as if he was at fault for whatever is happening.

“I called you here this urgently because I have a grievous matter to discuss with you,” Lan Qiren starts as soon as Jiang Cheng’s parents took a seat.

Jiang Cheng, Jiang Yanli and Wei Wuxian are sitting to the side, Lan Xichen in front of them, and both of his siblings are holding one of his hands.

“What did he do?” Madam Yu snaps out, her eyes never leaving Wei Wuxian in an accusing glare, but for once in his life, Wei Wuxian doesn’t back down.

“I didn’t,” he says, but falls silent when Lan Qiren glares at him before he turns back to Madam Yu and Jiang Fengmian.

“After teaching several classes to the newly arrived disciples it came to my attention that something wasn’t right with Jiang Wanyin,” he says and even though Jiang Cheng isn’t looking directly at Jiang Fengmian he can see how he stiffens.

Still, Jiang Cheng flinches when his mother’s eyes cut to him, but he holds her gaze. It isn’t his fault after all.

“We had a talk and as a result of that, I had cause to examine his golden core.”

“That is a grave breach of privacy,” Jiang Fengmian speaks up, his voice mild, and Jiang Cheng feels sick with hate.

“Of course you would think so,” Wei Wuxian hisses out and for the first time since Madam Yu stepped foot into this room, she frowns and turns towards Lan Qiren.

“What is going on?” she demands to know but Lan Qiren keeps his eyes on Jiang Fengmian as he continues to talk.

“To my horror I had to find that most of his core has been sealed away, making him unable to use most of his potential.”

Madam Yu freezes with surprise in her seat, while Jiang Fengmian goes white in the face.

“And that none other than Jiang Fengmian is the one who cast the spell,” Lan Qiren finally finishes and Madam Yu’s head snaps around to her husband, who keeps a composed face.

“Don’t listen to him,” he tells her, and Jiang Cheng can’t decide if he wants to get up and punch him in the face or run away crying.

It’s only Jiang Yanli’s and Wei Wuxian’s hands in his that keep him seated.

“I should hope you have proof,” Madam Yu says, Zidian sparking dangerously on his finger, and while her eyes never leave Jiang Fengmian Lan Qiren straightens.

“I do,” he says and motions for Jiang Cheng to step up to him. “The seal is not yet undone, though I am working on it.”

Madam Yu strides up to Jiang Cheng without hesitation, taking his wrist more gently than Jiang Cheng expected her to and it’s not long before her whole face darkens with rage.

“You useless, spineless worm of a coward,” she snaps out, once she confirmed what Lan Qiren said and Zidian sparks on her hand again as she whirls around to Jiang Fengmian. “How dare you. I’m going to kill you.”

Jiang Cheng doesn’t doubt that his mother will do as she says, but before she can send Zidian towards Jiang Fengmian Lan Qiren stops her hand.

“The punishment for this is not death,” he tells her, and when Madam Yu turns furious eyes on him he doesn’t seem to care at all. “His punishment will be that his core gets sealed. Completely.”

“Qiren, if you think that I will not have his head for this, you’re mistaken,” Madam Yu hisses and Jiang Cheng frowns when Lan Qiren smiles at her.

“I know, Ziyuan,” he gives back. “But what happens in the privacy of your own home is no concern of mine.”

Jiang Cheng gasps—like his siblings do as well—because Lan Qiren just gave Madam Yu permission to do as she pleases in her own home.

And everyone here present knows how this will end.

Jiang Cheng almost wants to look at his father, to see how he takes what is essentially his death sentence, but he can’t bring himself to do it.

Wei Wuxian doesn’t seem to have the same problems though.

“Why did you do it? How can you hate Jiang Cheng enough to do this?” he wants to know and Jiang Cheng wants to sink into his seat.

He doesn’t want to hear this, doesn’t want to know just how he could have possible offended his father enough to do this to him.

“It’s because he is my son, isn’t it?” Madam Yu cuts in, her voice as icy as her glare. “And because Wei Wuxian is hers.”

“Yes,” Jiang Fengmian says, speaking for the first time since Lan Qiren started to talk, and Jiang Cheng hates that his first thought is, that it’s not even something that is his fault.

It’s not something Jiang Cheng did that made his father hate him. It’s who he is. Jiang Cheng never even had a chance to change into someone he would like.

“You really think your son could ever be better than hers?” Jiang Fengmian says and gets up.

Jiang Yanli tightens her grip on Jiang Cheng’s hand until it’s almost painful, and Jiang Cheng is ashamed to find that he’s shaking.

“He doesn’t deserve the potential that is in him. A-Xian deserves to outshine everyone, so I just helped that along.”

Slap.

Jiang Cheng jerks with the sound, but he can’t say that he’s too surprised that his mother slapped Jiang Fengmian.

“You are dead,” she says and steps closer to him. “If you think I will allow you to live a moment longer after we enter Lotus Pier you are mistaken,” she quietly tells him and when Jiang Fengmian’s eyes go to Lan Qiren—probably to ask for justice—Lan Qiren holds his gaze without flinching.

“What happens in Lotus Pier is none of my concern,” Lan Qiren repeats and Jiang Cheng is surprised to hear how angry he sounds. “It is my believe that you will get what you deserve.”

Jiang Cheng’s eyes fill with tears again, and he knows he should be horrified that his father is basically going to his death once he leaves the Cloud Recesses, but all he can feel is gratefulness for Lan Qiren and his mother for being on his side.

Jiang Cheng thinks it probably makes him a bad person, but he can’t find it in him to care.

“You didn’t even give me a chance,” Jiang Cheng whispers and flinches when Jiang Fengmian turns towards him.

“And what chance did you deserve?” he wants to know, making Jiang Cheng’s stomach turn. “You were doing nothing but playing around, wasting your time with your dogs. A-Xian was hard-working and so much more deserving of your potential. You would have just wasted it anyway, so I relieved you of it. I would have given it to him if I had known how, but instead I had to content myself with sealing it away.”

Jiang Cheng can do nothing but blink at that, the words seeping into his heart like poison.

“I see,” he mutters, and startles when his mother suddenly kneels down in front of him.

“Do not listen to him, Jiang Cheng!” she orders him. “You are deserving and you are good.”

Jiang Cheng tries to muster a smile for his mother, but it’s hard, so hard when this is the first time she ever said something like this to him.

She was so ready to believe he was worth less, too and Jiang Cheng doesn’t know how to handle that.

He turns away from her, and when his gaze falls on Wei Wuxian he is met with a watery smile.

“I am so sorry,” Wei Wuxian says through his tears, and this is not at all what Jiang Cheng wants—it’s not Wei Wuxian’s fault after all—but he lacks the strength to argue with any of them right now.

“Seeing as the offended party is his own family, they have the right to carry out the punishment,” Lan Qiren cuts in and Jiang Cheng is grateful for the break. “Jiang Wanyin already stated that he doesn’t wish to be the one to do it. Wei Wuxian doesn’t qualify. That leaves you,” he nods at Madam Yu, “and Jiang Yanli.”

All eyes turn to Madam Yu at that, because of course she will be the one to do it, but before she can nod Jiang Yanli gets up and steps forward.

“I wish to do it,” she states and Jiang Cheng whips his head around so fast he almost hurts himself.

“A-jie, no,” he whispers and Jiang Yanli turns towards him, a kind smile on her lips.

“Yes, A-Cheng. He hurt you, and I will not stand for that. I will do it,” she states again, and Jiang Cheng has never seen her stare Jiang Fengmian down like she’s doing right now.

“As you wish,” Lan Qiren says without a hint of surprise and Jiang Cheng suspects that this was previously agreed upon.

“You don’t even know how to do it,” Jiang Fengmian says, frowning when Jiang Yanli steps up to him.

“I had a wonderful teacher,” she says with a nod at Lan Qiren and Jiang Cheng suddenly understands why she stayed so much longer with Lan Qiren the day before, when Wei Wuxian and Jiang Cheng had already returned to their room.

Before Jiang Fengmian can do anything to stop her, she reaches out for his wrist. While Jiang Fengmian had concentrated on her, Lan Xichen had stepped up behind him, putting his hand on his shoulder, clearly preventing Jiang Fengmian from lashing out at Jiang Yanli.

The sealing though, is all her, Jiang Cheng knows that.

He has to avoid his eyes when his father starts to scream and he remembers how he had tried so hard not to make a sound when his father did this to him. Revulsion rises up in Jiang Cheng when he realizes just how weak his father truly is and he is almost glad when he passes out.

Madam Yu is staring at Jiang Yanli who doesn’t seem to regret what she did at all, because she gives one last disgusted look to the heap in front of her feet, before she hurries back to Jiang Cheng’s side and pulls him into a hug.

“It’s okay now,” she whispers into his hair. “He’s never going to hurt you again.”

“A-jie,” Jiang Cheng says, and then his voice fails him when he has to sob.

“I’m going to take you home, now,” Madam Yu suddenly says and Jiang Cheng stiffens.

He doesn’t want to go home; doesn’t want to share the same space as Jiang Fengmian does, not even for a single second, but Jiang Yanli is keeping his face pressed to her shoulder. He can only feel her shaking her head.

“No, you won’t,” she declares, not at all backing down from their mother.

“It’s not a good idea,” Lan Qiren chimes in as well. “I still have to undo the seal and he needs to learn to handle his full potential. Travelling now is not advisable.”

“Jiang Cheng,” Madam Yu tries again, voice softer than before, but Jiang Cheng shakes his head.

He doesn’t want to go home, doesn’t want to go with her, doesn’t want to be without his siblings.

Jiang Cheng blindly reaches out for Wei Wuxian who immediately takes his hand again, and it gives Jiang Cheng enough strength to pull away from Jiang Yanli.

“I want to stay here,” he says through the lump in his throat and Madam Yu seems as though she wants to argue, but in the end she nods.

“Fine,” she bites out and then turns away from him, glaring at Jiang Fengmian who is still unconscious. “Do not expect to see him again,” she warningly says and then simply hefts him up and drags him out of the room.

Jiang Cheng can’t say he minds that too much, though he distantly knows that this is all too much right now. He’ll mind it later, he’s sure of that.

Jiang Yanli lets out a long sigh when Madam Yu is gone and Jiang Cheng is startled to see tears on her face.

He reaches out to brush them away and she gives him a watery smile.

“I wanted to hurt him so much more,” she admits and new tears spill over. “Please tell me you didn’t have to suffer like that.”

Jiang Cheng opens his mouth but he can’t bring himself to lie to her and she seems to understand because her face crumbles and sobs wreck her body.

“A-Cheng, I am so sorry,” she sobs out and pulls him yet again into a hug. “You’ll never have to suffer like that again.”

“It’s okay now,” he hollowly says, not at all knowing how he’s supposed to comfort her, and it’s only Lan Qiren’s grounding hand that suddenly appears on his shoulder that allows his own tears to flow freely.

“You can stay here as long as you like,” he softly tells Jiang Cheng. “Long after the lessons, if you wish.”

“Thank you,” Jiang Cheng presses out and is surprised when Wei Wuxian bows deeply to Lan Qiren.

“Thank you for everything you’re doing for our brother,” he says and Jiang Cheng almost falls flat on his face, he leans forward so quickly to pull Wei Wuxian into his arms.

“I promise I won’t break any more rules and stay by your side,” Wei Wuxian mutters as he crushes Jiang Cheng to his chest and Jiang Yanli nods at that.

“We’re not going to leave you,” she says as well and Jiang Cheng allows himself to relax into their embrace.

He might have lost part of his family, but he still has the most important people around him.

And he’s sure that will be enough, for now and the future.

{Buy me a kofi}

#ninjalibrarianbookworm #bt writes #the untamed #mdzs #jiang cheng #jiang fengmian #lan qiren #wei wuxian #lan xichen #jiang yanli #yu ziyuan #child abuse #angst #hurt/comfort #jfm still remains the worst ever #he gets what he deserves though #lqr has a soft spot for jc #and you can fight me on that #yunmeng siblings

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closer-stars · 4 years

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Good Thing - Mingi (3)

Member: Mingi with some appearances of the other members Genre: Fluff, overall good stuff, maybe a lil drama mmm Requested: Yes Word Count: 9k Content: Y/N shy. Mingi babie. Wooyoung doesn’t know how to keep secrets. They’re finally lovers. Note: HELLO THIS IS THE FINAL PART TO GOOD THING. First time writing this much. What was supposed to be a one shot became a 3 part series THE HECK. Also I should try making a divider soon. Pls give this as much love as you did with the previous parts.

Part 1 ,Part 2 here

Since your competition was finished, your days have gotten a lot quieter. You had to admit, you looked a little better as compared to the weeks that lead up to your competition. Though, instead of heading home early, you spend your time by the stands in your school’s basketball court. It’s time to repay his kindness you thought so as you wait for his training to finish, you continue to review your notes for the upcoming exams and requirements. There were times where you’d stop poring over your laptop screen to watch his team practice various drills and sets. Most of those times were spent watching Mingi in particular be in his zone. You had to admit, it’s interesting to see Mingi be in this state. In the years of your rivalry with him, his eyes would always narrow at the sight of you, jaw clenched as he would try to keep himself from making a scene (spoiler: it usually fails), the cocky lopsided grin he dons when he sees his friends with you.

You see the similarities of it on the court. Even if this is just practice, he already has his game mode on. He’s not fazed by his other teammates trying to get the ball from him or break his focus. The amount of times he fails to make it to the net could be counted on one hand. He really is the standard for the future members of the team. Despite the coach only talking of what to improve on and what to focus on, he didn’t seem fazed by it. You could see that while he was more physical on cheering for the other members, Yunho was more verbal. Their differences shine on and off court: Yunho on the defense, Mingi on the offense. Put both of them in court and it looks like a force to be reckoned with. No wonder your university has been the champions for the past four years. You weren’t that familiar with all the faces in the team, you did keep to yourself for the most part but you were familiar with how they had an impressive fan base outside the university. They were athletic with nice faces, God really played favorites.

You look at the time and it wouldn’t be long until their training finishes. You’ve gotten used to eating dinner with him and occasionally with Yunho as well. Did you mind how late it would go? Not really. Late night trainings has eventually made you a nocturnal. The same could be said for them, except those two are a little better at dealing with the morning. You pack your things up once you see their coach call it a day for them. Some of the boys were walking slowly around the court to cool down while others immediately made their way to their training bags.

Yunho manages to see you waiting by the stands and waves at you, how he has energy still after such a grueling time is beyond you. He nudges at Mingi and you can only assume that he’s telling him that you’re here based on how he looks around wildly until he catches sight of you. A timid wave is thrown to them as you make your way down the steps. Mingi picks up his back and he looks up at you while you look down at him from the elevated platform. “What are you doing here?” He asks you with a smile that tries its best to stay hidden.

“Waiting for you to walk me home, d’uh. Are you ready to grab dinner?” You tease with a roll of your eyes. The sharp gaze from earlier has shifted into something softer as you tease him. Thanks to your quick reflexes you manage to avoid his fingers tapping your chin.

“C’mon then. I’m hungry as hell.” He states while patting his stomach. Mingi calls for Yunho if he wants to join for burgers and burritos. Knowing that human sized golden retriever, he wouldn’t say no to burritos. If your package deal is you with Wooyoung and San, the same could be said for Yunho and Mingi. It was rare for you to see one without the other, save for when Mingi picks you up from training. His best friend practically sprints over at the mention of burritos.

“Let’s go!” He hollers as he continues to sprint out the court, leaving the two of you in the dust.

Dinner wasn’t as stressful as it was in the past, if you were eating with the two of them, you opt to just listen to the two of them banter about anything and discuss their classes and training.

“I can’t believe you're about to leave me alone in this team.” Yunho says with a sulk, cheeks puffed from his burrito. Mingi rolls his eyes again and makes a face at the male.

“I’m still going to visit your practices while I still don’t have a job yet, dumbass.” Mingi returns. “Besides,” he continues before taking a bite out of his burger. “Have you already considered who you want to take over your position once you become the captain?” This is a conversation you knew too well so you opt to just watch as each guy speaks.

“What do you think of Jongho? He’s got a lot of potential. Incoming Junior too so once I leave, he’s got a year of experience leading the team with me.”

All Mingi could do while his mouth was full was to nod and give a thumbs up. “Someone to balance your hyperactiveness too.” This makes you snicker into your food, causing two pairs of eyes to look at you. “What?”

You shake your head. “Nothing, it’s just a conversation I’ve had also with my team.” You let them continue as you finish your meal. It takes a while before they finish their meal, stalled by their constant back and forths about what’s due the following day and what isn’t. It only ended because you suggested to look at the calendar for that class. Yunho’s right: Nothing’s due the next day much to Mingi’s relief. Eventually, Mingi and you split ways from Yunho, not that he minds. He also knew how coffee runs in your veins.

Once you and Mingi are left alone, he lets out a sigh. One that was mixed with exhaustion and relief. “Are you okay?” You ask with a light laugh as you notice his shoulders drop while rolling his neck around.

“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just really tired from all the training. Kind of excited to end this basketball stunt I’ve been doing since day 1.” He admits with a laugh. You don’t know how it happened, but your conversations with Mingi have been happening more often now. The two of you don’t seem to run out of things to talk about, should there be a lull in the conversation, it wasn’t a big deal. Everything just felt comfortable and peaceful. As peaceful and comfortable it can be for graduating students that is.

He opens the door to the coffee shop for you before following you inside. Your table was also free: perks of being a regular you suppose. The staff catches sight of you and already prepares the usual for the two of you. “The usual yeah?” The woman behind the cashier asks you approach the counter. Mingi had already drifted to your table, relieved to have his legs rest once more. When you arrive at your table, you already have all your orders on your tray.

“Hey careful.” Mingi chides gently as he helps you settle everything down onto the table. You hum a soft thanks for his help. Usually, when the two of you were in this coffee shop, Mingi had his earphones in as he worked on his laptop. This time’s a little different. He’s still on his laptop but he had no earphones in.

“Did something happen to your earphones?” You ask, not used to the sight in front of you. Some people would have their gazes linger at the two of you, and you already know it’s because of Mingi. You keep quiet about it, already certain that Mingi knows of it. He doesn’t seem to mind it as much anymore though. It takes a while before he tears his gaze away from his screen and you couldn’t help but want to squish his cheeks at how adorable he looks when he looks at you; pursed lips that make his cheeks puff out and wide eyes. You know better than to do so in public like this though.

The two of you were just friends after all.

“Ah, yeah. One side doesn’t work anymore, so I just don’t bother to bring it.” He explains as his pursed lips turn into a faint pout. He really didn’t show his softer side in public but having you around him makes it come out more often. You reach through your bag’s pocket for your earphones then hand it to him.

“Here.” You say simply. “I don’t need it right now anyways.” You reassure him when he looks at you with the same wide eye look. He gingerly takes the earphones from you and plugs it into his laptop. You were about to continue looking through social media when you noticed his expressions. He pulls out one bud and looks at you as if you grew two heads.

“Why is your earphones’ sound quality so good? I can hear everything in my music.” He explains, as he tries to look for the brand name on the wire.

Your mouth was open to reply but you stopped yourself quickly. Why did ‘Babe’ flash in your head instead of his name? It takes you a few moments to regain your composure. “Mingi, the brand’s kind of not that important. The specifications are what you should be looking at. I can show you after your game this weekend.” You explain.

His jaw falls slightly ajar at the explanation. Why didn’t he think of looking at that? “It’s a deal then.” At least he has something to look forward to after his game, something to wake up to the following day.

After an hour or two so in the coffee shop, you were ready to head home, Mingi much more. He takes a few minutes to stretch his aching muscles before practically deflating on his seat again. “Mingi, come on.” You laugh, amused by his antics. “The sooner we get home, the sooner you can sleep.”

Witha whine, he caves and pushes himself up, hoisting his bag over his shoulder. “Let’s gooo” He mumbles through a stifled yawn.

The walk up to your dorm was quiet, mostly from how his exhaustion was setting in his bones. “Get some sleep okay?” You say before you step into your living room. He nods almost like a child, rubbing his eyes with the back of his knuckles. You gaze at him for a moment, and before you knew it you had your hand cupping his cheek. “Just a few more days, Mingi. You’ll be free from this after.” You reassure him.

He stops his movements when he feels your hand gently rub against his cheek. Your voice takes a softer tone. His heart does something funny at how you talk to him and he doesn’t realize how he leans into your touch. A deep breath. “I know. I’ll get going now, yeah.” He says, as he wraps up your earphones neatly before handing it back to you. “Thank you for this, by the way. Good night.” With that, he makes his way to his place. While his body aches for rest, his head and heart need to go through some reflection.

What are these feelings?

You close the door gently and shake your head, unsure of how to describe your feelings. You glance at your earphones for a moment, a small frown on your features as confusion sets in. “Whatever.” You mumble as you drop off all your stuff by the couch as you wash yourself up. You need sleep.

You wake up, vague images of your dreams slowly melting away from your consciousness. Even if these images were hard to decipher as you become more awake, it’s hard not to miss the messy mop of hair that Mingi has. What was he doing in your dreams? You look at the time. 7AM. Already a message from Mingi greeting you a good morning, at… 6AM? How much sleep did he have?

From chats post training until arriving at your dorm, to being the first one you talk to in the morning.

[ You ] How much sleep did you get, mister?

You push yourself up, to ready yourself for the new day.

[ Mingi ] Five? Four hours 30 minimum.

You can’t even get yourself to be mad at that. You’ve done the same just to prepare for your competition. So instead, you sigh.

[ You ] Make sure you catch up on sleep soon.

[ Mingi ] :p

You wonder how you’re able to put up with his stubborn antics.

On the times where the two of you have the same breaks, he would be with you with San and Wooyoung. Same for you with Yunho. Sometimes the three of them with the two of you, on those occasions though, your cheeks hurt from trying to keep your laughter in. When Mingi and Yunho had to leave for their class, leaving the three of you alone. Once the two were out of earshot, San and Wooyoung started to bombard you with questions.

“Really?” San starts, arms crossed as a privy smile creeps onto his features.

“What?” You ask, unsure of where he was going with this. A small part of you knew where it was going though.

“Dude, it’s obvious.” Wooyoung adds, his grin a lot more overt than his best friend’s. “Don’t think we’ve seen how you look at Mingi.” He continues, flailing his loose fists at you, clearly enjoying your flustered state.

A blink. Two blinks. “What do you mean?” You ask, trying to play dumb. San leans forward, as he rests his chin on the palm of his hand. He looks at you like a cat about to pounce. All that was missing was a tail that would swoosh side to side behind him.

“My dear,” he starts as he raises a finger up to your forehead. “You.” poke. “Are.” poke. “Crushing.” poke. “On-” poke.

You repeatedly try to swat his hand away but opt to just lean away from his reach and try to bite his finger. “Ow! Okay I get it!” You groan out in mild annoyance at his childish action. Maybe that’s what you’ve been feeling lately. In love? You weren’t sure yet. Crushing? Maybe. It seems to make sense considering how you’ve been lately. “Is it that obvious?” You ask after a moment, voice a little soft as you wanted to avoid any eavesdropper.

Two pairs of eye rolls. You’ll take that as a yes as your cheeks heat up.

“Only to us cause we know you better than you know yourself sometimes.” San explains.

Wooyoung straightens up in his seat, making both San and you look at him. “You do know that this means our lovely sweetheart here actually has a heart-- ow!” He whines as you kick his shin under the table. This makes San squeak in laughter.

“Excuse me! I’ve always had a heart!” You shoot back with an insulted whine. San pats your head lightly to calm you down. It works, sort of.

San then continues, “Besides us knowing you’re whipped, how do you feel about him?” It makes you pause for a moment as you try to think of how to properly articulate how you feel around Mingi. “The closest way I can describe it is how when you get to dance to a piece that just feels so right for you.” Why did your words fail you now? Just last week, you were able to talk to Mingi in a way that even impressed you. You take a deep breath, finding your heart race the more you think about it.

“Right now, my heart’s racing a little the longer I think about him.” You start, your words stumbling over each other. “I feel more relaxed around him, someone I can lean on also when things just get so tough…” you trail off, eyes jumping from various points of the table. “I don’t want to say that he made my days have a reason since it always had one way or another, but he makes my days feel a little more bearable.” Your fingers brush through your hair restlessly. Finding it a little odd that you’re here bearing a bit of your soul to your best friends in broad daylight, but too late to go back on it. Your eyes drift from the greenery that hang over the terrace to the two boys who have been your partners in crime since Day 1. They don’t say anything to you for the past few moments and it starts to get on your nerves. “Don’t act like the two of you are mute. Both of you are the sole source of noise in the team.”

A flash of something like amusement passes by San’s features. “To be honest, we just hoped that you and Mingi would fix things up before you guys leave but seeing you so whipped for that guy is something Wooyoung and I didn’t expect.”

“What this guy is trying to say is,” Wooyoung quickly interjects, knowing how San’s words can get easily mixed up especially in your ears. “We had an idea to make the both of you make up after the competition season because you have your moments during the season but having that other team constantly steal our usual spot, we kind of just hoped for the best at that point. We’ve noticed it too, stupid. You look happier even during training.”

That kind of stumps you. You’ve had your fair share of relationships-- if they can be considered as such, in the past. To have your thing with Mingi affect you that much that it shows in your performance was a first. You lean back in your seat as you digest everything that has happened. You wonder if Mingi shares the same feelings as you but you’d rather not ask that for now. If anything, you’re fine being just friends with him. You’ll make the most with what you got with him.

“So when are you going to tell him?” Wooyoung asks, before taking a sip of his milk tea.

“What?” You stare at him blankly at his odd question.

“When are you telling him that you like him?”

You didn’t stay in your usual seat on the stands when you watched Mingi practice. The coach didn’t seem to mind your presence since you didn’t cause much of a disturbance. You put your earphones in as you would read through your readings for your final requirements. If the words didn’t register into your head, you’d watch him. If your attention on him drifts back to theories, you would read. You had to admit, you didn’t understand the flow of basketball besides the point system, some no-brainer rules but the technicalities? The diagrams the coach shows them in order to execute a certain game plan? That’s another language. A mental note to ask him about how basketball was made in the back of your head. Eyes drift back to your colorful annotated readings as you spin your pen in your hands. How exactly were you going to connect Aristotle’s beliefs to Capitalism?

You don’t really realize how deep you were into your readings until Mingi crashed onto the seat next to you. His sudden appearance causes you to jump in your seat. “You idiot!” You pull out your earphones as you whine at his antics. He does nothing but laugh at your reaction. It takes a while for you to tear your gaze away from him, even if he’s still sweating heavily, you still found him pleasing to your eyes. From him still wiping down his sweat, you turn your gaze to his team that were taking a breather. The coach had already left the premises by now, it seems. “Where do you want to go for dinner?” You ask, keeping your eyes trained either at the team or at your screen. Why? Because the flash of a shirt came up to the corner of your eye and you already knew from being best friends with Wooyoung and San that he’s changing his shirt right next to you. So much for a heads up.

“Can we get some Japanese food? I’m kind of craving for ramen right now.” He notices your perseverance to avoid looking at his exposed skin, a soft chuckle leaving his lips. To save you from your misery, he quickly puts on another shirt. He lets his towel rest over his shoulder, his hair still drenched from sweat.

You wait for another flash of color, a few moments before facing him. “Sure thing.” You close your laptop and put it back into its sleeve with your readings and pen. He catches sight of the title of your readings and raises an eyebrow at you.

“Philosophy?”

You sigh and shake your head. “I love you and all but I’d rather keep anything philosophical away from my everyday chats with anyone, you included.”

He laughs, denying the skip of his heart at those three words. A hand is extended towards you to hold onto to pull you out of your seat. “Come on then, nerd.”

You don’t know how he has the appetite to finish the bowl of ramen with ease, then again he was tired from his practice. His body was most likely still using the left over energy from his previous meals. While here you are, taking your time with your ramen. “Mingi, there’s no rush. Your stomach might hurt..” You chide him gently. He reaches for a piece of sushi from the plate both of you agreed on.

“Sorry, I’m just really hungry.” A soft smile was shot at his direction. 6AM to 11PM. You wonder how he’s still able to stand on his own two feet after such a long day.

“Just a few more days then you’re free.” You say in return. As you take your time with your meal, you look out the window. You watch the cars come and go, while students either head home, study somewhere or go for a drink. Mingi takes the chance to get a good look at your features, unburdened by responsibilities and competitions, you look content and maybe even hopeful.

“How about a penny for your thoughts?” Mingi says, quoting you, as he leans back on his seat. His ramen was nearly finished, and it’s only now that he decides to take a breather. When you whip your head back to him, the privy smile that makes your lips look a little prettier in his mind results in a mild dazed look on his face.

You chuckle then shake your head. “Nothing important in my head,” you start. “Which is a first.” You say, beating him to it. “I just like being able to quiet down with you is all.” You admit before eating again. “I mean, I know you’re just as stressed with this competition.. I just like the fact there’s no pressure for either of us at this moment.” You quickly add, realizing that he might misunderstand your words.

It’s his turn to laugh. Somehow he feels touched that you always make sure that he doesn’t misunderstand you. By now though, he’s got the hang of it. It’s still ot perfect but it’s progress. He leans his head against the palm of his hand as he watches you flounder around your words. It was a nice switch up, he supposed. From you being so composed and strong, you were now being flustered and bashful. “I know what you mean and don’t worry too much about me. Our team’s gotten a lot stronger as compared to last year, ask Yunho if you want.” He returns, while trying to push back his hair that blocks his view of you. Maybe he should get a haircut soon. “Just come to watch us this Saturday, and you’ll see just how good we are.”

You’d be an idiot to say no to that.

It’s already Saturday and you’re in the arena with your best friends and Yeosang, the latest addition to your circle. It made sense to have him along too to bond with Wooyoung and San for the sake of your team’s dynamic. Thanks to Wooyoung’s tip, you could easily see why you had to wear something that was near your school’s color. It was easier to see who was there to support your school and who was for the opponent. It was interesting to people who looked like they’re the alumni of their respective schools come to watch this game. Various ages and walks of life seemed to come to watch. Did you expect to see your Philosophy professor here too? Not really.

“I think I just saw my Philosophy professor.” You mumble, as you try to hide from her gaze.

“Professor Yang? He’s an avid fan of our games. Remember when I failed that one quiz I kept whining about?” San asks you as he becomes your shield.

“Yeah?”

“That was the one time our team lost a game. He’s a terror professor for a reason but also he’s really good at his thing so I can’t really… get mad at that.” He explains. You remember that day clearly, you’ve never seen San whine and complain to you and Wooyoung so much that day. It took a big helping of fries, milk tea and a new plush toy for him to cheer up. “You’re lucky you took him during the off season.”

The four of you found your seats, good enough to see the entire game and see some familiar faces from your point of view. Your school’s color is the obvious opposite of your rival school. You didn’t really expect the rivalry to be intense but did you expect the roaring cheers from respective schools? You weren’t sure. Considering it’s your first time to attend one of the games in your entire university life, you were walking entertainment for the three boys.

“How are you?” Yeosang asks, trying his best to not show his entertainment to your wide eyes as you watch the crowds bounce to the cheers.

“This is such an interesting experience..” You yell over the cheering, sandwiched by him and Wooyoung as they guide you through the cheers that hype the crowd for the game. Eventually you found your groove into the whole thing and found yourself bouncing with your friends, cheering wholeheartedly.

In the quieter moments, Wooyoung raises the topic of you and Mingi to Yeosang. “What do you think?” Bless Yeosang’s quick wit to understand Wooyoung’s vague retelling. You had to beg Wooyoung to keep it vague considering where the three of you are right now.

Yeosang just looks at Wooyoung, as if you weren’t there when he replies. “No brainer after they hugged him? The flowers were a nice touch too.”

Your ears heat up and before you could hide it, Wooyoung’s laugh has you caught red-handed. “Oh my god shut up!” You whine as you try to cover his mouth. A disgusted yelp bursts through your mouth when you feel him lick your palm. “Ew!” Before he could move away from you, you quickly wipe your hand on his arm. Yeosang exchanges a glance with San and almost immediately, they move a few inches away from the two of you.

[ You ] I’m here with San, Wooyoung and Yeosang!

[ You ] selfie.jpg

“You ready?” Yunho asks Mingi as he lets his best friend look through his messages one last time before gathering with his team. He says nothing but tosses his phone into his training bag again. The fire in his eyes burns a little brighter this time. He’s doing this for his team, his school and you. One more school cheer among the team before they head out to the court to the roaring cheers from each school. He knows where you’re seated but for now, his focus was limited to what’s inside the four corners of the court.

The game then begins and the stands roar with life again and you stand up from your seat again to watch the basketball teams fight it out for the gold. You immediately spot Mingi running through the other team, managing to score several points for your school before a timeout was requested by the opponent’s coach. Even with the arms of your friends on you, you found yourself mumbling through the cheers as you keep your focus on him and his team. Whenever one team manages to shoot the ball through the net, you look at the scores, hoping that your school eventually takes the gold. Until now, you don’t understand the technicalities but you trust his team. It’s not like you spent several hours last night searching up videos of his past games.

After the time out, the game continues, a tight match as the scores decrease and increase in difference. You don’t realize how long you’ve been holding your breathe as the game continues. You might be at a far distance from the court but you could feel Mingi’s fire to win this game. This is the Song Mingi who is the basketball’s captain for a reason, and for once you can understand why he’s the face of your university.

Half time comes and the cheer teams of each school takes over the court for the time being. Mingi heads to the seats as he listens to the coach discuss the next plan for the second half of the game. He drapes his towel over his shoulders as he downs his water. He was already drenched in sweat, constantly wiping away the sweat that gets close to his eyes. Once half time finishes, his coach gestures to the players to get back out on court. As he tosses his towel to his bag, he catches sight of what looks like you with your friends. After seeing you perform, he could already tell how you looked like from a distance. His lips grow into a confident grin (a money shot for the press), before he jogs back to the court. Soon enough, the cheers fall on deaf ears as he focuses on the game. A fake out here, passing the ball there, avoiding blocks here and there, and the usual two point or three point shot. He doesn’t focus on the points he’s earning for the team. He’s focused on making sure the team moves within one wavelength for the gold.

Another time out and he takes a deep breath to calm himself down. He looks up at the scoreboard with the time left. ‘Just a few more minutes.’ He thinks. Yunho pats his back as reassurance before he heads to the free throw area. It takes a while, buying enough time for his team to catch their breath before doing their best to win this by a landslide. Yunho gets the point and the game soon resumes.

By the last quarter, the cheers have gotten louder but it does nothing to Mingi. His lithe limbs manage to avoid falling into the tricks of the opponent. He spares a glance at the timer.

Five seconds left.

He’s already in the middle of the court.

Four seconds.

He’s still running. ‘Fuck it’. He throws the ball from where he stands.

Three.

Two.

One.

The ball goes through the net in the nick of time, the buzzer goes off and your university snags the gold. Confetti bursts through and fills the air with the color of your university. Press photographers and school photographers flock to the court, hoping to get a money shot of the team celebrating the fourth Gold. The members on the court surround themselves with their teammates and coach, cheering at the top of their lungs with their schoolmates. After the quick celebration, everyone cheers for the rival university as respect and thanks for an intense game. Hands were shaken, hugs exchanged and congratulatory messages were sent to each side. Media have swarmed some of the members, his coach and him. Questions thrown at his direction too fast but he manages to catch the gist in the midst of his euphoria.

“How do I feel? I feel grateful, if it weren’t for my teammates and my coach here, I wouldn’t be here.” Mingi answers through heavy breathing after the intense adrenaline rush. After a few minutes of celebratory cheers, the coach asks the press for their chance to leave the court.

Once out of the court and back where their other valuables were kept, Yunho takes the chance to jump onto Mingi’s back, laughing gleefully at their win. “Who told you to throw the ball from there?! Jesus that was an amazing buzzer beater shot.” He praises, ruffling Mingi’s sweat drenched hair. Mingi stumbles slightly at the sudden weight on his back, thankfully Jongho manages to steady the two boys' rough housing in the room.

“Practice, I guess.” Mingi admits, rubbing the back of his neck. Why else had he been waking up so early the past few days? Even if he didn’t see himself doing this in the long run, basketball is still one of his favored activities. “Hey, Jongho. If you need help with those types of shots, just hit me up.” He jokes.

Jongho takes the chance to snort at his cheeky offer. “You got it, Hyung. Might beat you at it soon.” He teases.

Mingi has a feeling he’ll take over the team with ease and he’s happy with that. Even if he’s on lazer focus on court, he notices how his teammates perform on court and Jongho’s growth has been one of the best. He pats Jongho’s chest firmly. “I look forward to that, Jong. Keep Yunho in line for me too.” He shoots, causing his dear friend to sulk as he becomes the butt of the teasing.

Their coach asks for a final huddle, here he thanks the team for an amazing season and an even greater ending. With that, they do one last cheer before they stream out to where their friends and families wait for them to celebrate the night.

A small part of Mingi starts to hope that you were there waiting for him too.

The moment your school won, you were jumping on your spot excitedly with your friends. You crouch down eventually, sighing in relief once it sets in that Mingi was bringing home the gold. Just like he promised. It took you a few moments to gather your strength and stand up again, greeted by the sight of colorful confetti that bore the colors of your school, the basketball team jumping and celebrating over the court while photographers scramble to get a good shot of them celebrating for their respective media articles. Your best friends were jumping around, and with the rest of the people who cheered for your school, all of you cheered one last time.

You can’t see how Mingi looks but from his repeated bouncing and arms around his teammates, you can already see how ecstatic he was. Heck, you can picture his grin spreading across his features until his eyes turn into small crescents, until his laughter booms from his chest. Perhaps you were whipped for the basketball team’s captain.

People start to stream out of the stadium, so you wait for your friends to follow suit. You find your throat feeling a little scratchy from the yelling and cheering you’ve done. It was worth it, you thought. Seeing someone succeed and be with their loved ones until the end, while it’s a good thing to experience, seeing it from an outsider’s point of view was just as good. Especially if it was someone you loved.

“So how did you find your first and last game, hm?” San practically purrs as he uses your back as his next armrest.

You stumble a bit at the sudden weight on your back, so you pinch his side lightly. His yelp being music to your ears. “One for the books, San. Especially with the three of you.” You state as you find yourself laughing with delight. The endorphins and adrenaline are still running wildly in you.

“Can’t believe you even got something for Mingi.”

At Wooyoung’s teasing, you try to hide the gift from his view, quickly followed by you attempting to bite his prodding finger. Yeosang couldn’t help but find delight in Wooyoung’s expression as he manages to avoid your teeth by a mere centimeter.

“Let’s go before our little captain here starts to shake in nervousness just to meet Mingi.” Yeosang added.

If you had to be in the same car with them on the way home, you weren’t really sure if you could deal with their teasings.

The four of you find yourselves, waiting for the rest of the basketball team to come out to bond with their friends and families. While you were already in good terms with Mingi, you let him bask in his parents’s love and pride for having done so well out there. You guess that the other guy, who shared some resemblance to him, is his older brother. He ruffles Mingi’s hair much to the younger’s demise, not that he minded though. They got the gold. It takes him a few minutes to spot you over the bustling crowd. You were with your friends and he couldn’t help but smile even brighter at the sight of you.

He introduces the four of you to his family. A situation that you found all too familiar from a week ago. His family takes this cue to let him be with his friends and team, saying that they’ll meet him with the rest of the team in the restaurant that has been reserved already-- win or lose, all of them were to eat heartily for such an impressive journey. You catch the knowing glint in his mother’s eyes and you already could tell what that look means. Whether it was for the better or for the worse, you don’t dare look at how Mingi reacts to such a look.

“What do you have there?” Mingi asks, gesturing at the paper bag you had in your hand.

Not now.

“Oh, I went on an errand earlier.” You lie, as you raise your shoulders. Somehow he buys this and informs where everyone’s eating tonight.

“Barbeque?!”

“Yeah, but if you guys order alcohol that’s not on us.” Mingi says quickly before San could say anything.

“None of you are getting drunk and riding my car.” Wooyoung interjects quickly. As much as he would like to see San and Yeosang make a fool out of themselves, he’d rather not have to clean after them in his car.

“We’ll be there. See you there.” The way you phrase it must’ve been funny to him as he chuckles softly.

“Why are you asking? I’ll definitely be there.” Mingi returns. He’s now the one squishing your cheeks together, much to your insistent complaints.

Neither of you realize that Yeosang has managed to take a photo of the both of you.

Fast forward to all of you meeting in a rather impressive barbeque restaurant. Wooyoung was running his mouth, amazed and curious to how they managed to snag an entire restaurant for the team, friends and family. The most your team could do was reserve a few tables, a huge difference from theirs.

“We need to know how they got the entire restaurant for themselves. Next year’s competition: we’re taking this place.” Wooyoung says before snatching a small piece of dried fish with the seasoned spinach.

You watch as Yeosang and San try to calm him down, too excited over the idea of food. Your gift for him was trapped in between your legs. Though you doubt he’d eat on the same table as you, you couldn’t help but hope still. The three of you agreed to let Wooyoung choose which meat cuts to order as he had the best knowledge when it came to food. None of you expected Yunho, Jongho and Mingi to crash themselves onto your table. It had even made Wooyoung jump in surprise, coughing on a small bean sprout.

“I thought you guys were going to eat as a team!?” San exclaims over the sudden boom of the music over the speakers, staff yelling at each other for the orders, and the chattering of friends and families.

“Nah, everyone just agreed to let everyone eat in one place then have everyone eat with whoever.” Jongho explains.

“So we decided to eat with the captains who are leaving their respective teams.” Yunho adds, with a small whine. No wonder he got the nickname Golden Yun-triever.

As the two continue to be mischievous, Mingi manages to take the chance to sit next to you. “So nice of you to join us, golden boy.” You say, soft enough to make sure no one hears your conversation, but loud enough that only he can hear.

“Don’t tell me you thought I was going to skip this opportunity to eat with you and our friends.” Mingi shoots back with a lopsided grin before taking a long sip of his water.

You wonder if there was an underlying meaning in his words. Your questions are covered up by a snicker. These wonderings were pushed to the back of your mind when Wooyoung tells everyone to make space for the trays of meat that your table has received. It eventually becomes him and Jongho taking turns cooking for everyone on the table for the first round.

As the night goes, laughter and stories were shared. An occassional yelp of pain when the grease from the grill and meat jump onto someone’s skin. You notice that it’s only now that your two cooks had started eating. You snatch the tongs from Wooyoung’s grasp. As he’s about to ask for them back, you shake your head. “Nuh-uh, mister. You are going to continue eating as I cook for you and everyone here.” Mingi quickly follows you, getting the tongs away from Jongho’s plate.

“Since we’re leaving soon, we should probably make this our parting gift to the next captains of our teams.” adds Mingi to your reasoning.

“This is your gift to us? Yet you got something fo--” Before San could say anymore, you shoot a piece of cooked pork belly into his mouth.

“San, you better not talk with your mouth full.” He pouts but does as he’s told. Who would say no to being fed?

Not now.

Once everyone was sated, Wooyoung asks where should they get dessert. All of you leaning back a little for some air, and for the food to digest. The water was some sort of relief but with the grease from the meat and side dishes, it could only do so much. Yunho suggests to have slushies, a good break from the heaviness of the meat and the humidity from the cooking meat.

“We’re not paying for the desserts, by the way.” Yunho adds before Wooyoung tries to take the more expensive option, much to the younger’s dismay.

Your group decides to leave the premises to get something sweet, some of you bidding goodbye and a good evening to some familiar faces. Mingi takes the longest in the restaurant, you and your friends are already by the door. Yunho fakes a sigh, dropping his shoulders as he does so. “Price of fame, I guess…” He mumbles much to the laughter of everyone. By the time Mingi catches up to everyone, he notices everyone trying to stifle their laughter.

“What’s so funny?” He asks, almost pouting for missing out on something humorous. Jongho shakes his head, as he eyes the others who had a harder time keeping their laughter.

“Just Yunho hyung being Yunho hyung.” The youngest says simply, hoping it would keep Mingi from being too curious. Mingi somehow finds himself looking at you instead of Yunho for reassurance as to what had just transpired. One way or another, you manage to keep your composure, the only thing giving away your entertainment is the glint in your eyes. He keeps a mental note to ask you later and decides to drop the topic.

“So where do we get dessert?” Mingi asks which Yunho takes as his cue to lead the group to the slushie spot. As everyone starts to walk ahead of you, you slow down to walk next to Mingi.

“How does freedom feel now, Champion?” You tease, and you swear seeing him so flustered by such attention was adorable. His red ears, his feeble attempt to keep himself from smiling widely, his free hand rubbing the back of his neck shyly, it sometimes makes you wonder why it so long for both of you to try again. It didn’t matter, you and Mingi had a good thing going on now and that’s more important than the past.

He whines softly at your adoration for him. “It feels good, I just have to deal with the contracts within the month so that Yunho and Jongho would be the prospects for these brands instead of me.” He admits with a shrug. “But that’s nothing too important as compared to now.” Laughter shakes from his chest, he didn’t mind any eyes that would land on him anymore. He doesn’t notice how you gaze at him softly and maybe that’s for the better, for now.

“Should we pay for these kids later?”

“Like a parting gift? Are you sure about it? I clearly remember you having money issues a few weeks back.”

“That’s one way to put it. I got an offer by a company to make a choreography for their idol group, considering how established they are, they already gave me a down payment after they saw my first draft.” You state and it nearly makes Mingi stop on his tracks.

“You already got work!?” Mingi exclaims and you scramble to make sure he doesn’t break your no disclosure agreement.

“Sh!! It’s a start. But what do you think? Should we pay for these children?” You ask, shifting the conversation to your group being the loud bunch that they are.

“Sounds like a plan. You owe me the complete story later though.”

Your friends peek into the place Yunho suggested. It was a hole in the wall, cozy, comfortable design. It’s perfect for everyone. Before everyone orders, you let them know that you and Mingi would be paying instead.

“Just don’t expect any physical gift from us after this.”

Yeosang bounces in happiness at the offer of free food. Wooyoung and San dancing in the corner. Yunho and Jongho, who could already pass off as brothers by how similar the looks of surprise are on their faces, stare at both of you. “Not like we’d turn that down. Free food is always yummier.” Yeosang hums.

So they order before the two of you. You and Mingi choose a few tables that’s good for sevent people. Time to move fast before any of them steal the chance. You hand the bag to Mingi, unable to look at him in the eye. “It’s actually for you.” Is your only explanation. Thanks to his curiosity and confusion by the sudden gift giving, he opens the package in front of you. Brand new earphones.

“H-how..?” He asks, dumbfounded as he opens the box to look at the inclusions. He knows a few things or two when it comes to earphones and this definitely isn’t cheap, this isn’t that expensive either. It didn’t take much to know that this model takes a dent to the wallet though.

“I’ll explain who I work for one of these days, but yeah because of the money my past clients have finally paid me for as well plus my current contract, and some of my savings, I got you a little something to congratulate you.” You explain, your fingers find themselves dancing with each other, too shy to look at him. “I figured si--” San calls the both of you to the cashier so that you could take your orders while paying for everyone else. You glance at Mingi for a quick second and stand up immediately. The male follows you closely as the earphones are still wound up around his fingers. Countless questions and thoughts run in his mind at your actions. Did you like him too?

Once everyone’s accounted for, the two of you slide back into your seat. Everyone had their slushies accounted for, and while you hoped they wouldn’t ask about the package on Mingi’s lap, it wouldn’t go the way you wish it would. “So you already know Mingi’s feelings for you?” Wooyoung asks before taking a long sip.

The two of you freeze in your seats as you look at the raven haired male. “What?” Both of you wait for him to recover from his brain freeze to explain what he had just said. While one’s cheeks burn from being exposed, the other’s felt hot from the surprise.

“I thought Mingi already told you he likes you?” Wooyoung manages to groan out as the brain freeze gradually dissipates. The two of you exchange a quick glance, Mingi clearly at a loss for words.

“And what about it?” You ask. Everyone’s eyes are on the two of you. Yeosang and Jongho just had to look away from the secondhand embarrassment they were receiving from Wooyoung.

“Did you already tell him your answer?” Your best friend looks a lot better compared to his earlier demise with the slushie.

“Is it your business?” A smirk flashes on your features and everyone whines. The man who sits across you carefully takes a sip of his slushie. Fearful that you would later reject his feelings, though a bit thankful that you didn’t outright reject him in front of everyone. The earphones in his pocket suddenly feels heavy.

You worry if what you did was a good idea.

The rest of the night goes by miraculously without a hitch. Mingi manages to keep up a facade, joining in the jokes and antics. You, relaxed and laughing at the things your friends do and talk about. Yunho talking about pranks the team has pulled on Mingi throughout the years, along with a warning to Jongho since this was a tradition.

Wooyoung looks at his phone for the time as he notices some shops have started closing up. “Oh crap, it’s already late. We should probably go.” Some of you look around and note the shops that have closed, staff saying good bye to each other as they head home. Your group stands up with Wooyoung, he was your group’s designated driver after all. “Do you guys have a ride home?” he asks as he throws his cup away, his question directed at the remaining three.

“Nah, we were planning to just take a taxi.” Jongho explains with a shrug.

You could see the gears in Wooyoung’s mind spin. “Just ride with us. I can give you guys a ride home. I have enough space.” At this hour, no one could say no to that.

Wooyoung on the wheel, Yeosang taking shotgun, San, Jongho and Yunho behind them while you and Mingi were at the back with their training bags. “You really putting your captains at the back?!” You complain.

“Technically, San, Yunho and I are the captains now so…” Wooyoung cackles behind the wheel as he drives out of the parking lot. You stick your tongue out at your best friend and sink back into your seat. You take out your phone, fixing up a quick message to Mingi.

[ You ] Was what they said earlier true?

You hope his phone was on silent or at least vibrate. You wait for him to receive the message and he does, reading your message immediately. It’s tricky to make things look discreet with how both of you wanted to deal with this.

[ Mingki ] Yeah. I do like you. It’s okay though if you don’t reciprocate though, I already appreciate what we have.

He notices his nickname on your phone just before you turn it off and it just makes his heart sink a little knowing that his feelings weren’t reciprocated. The ride home was quiet, everyone clearly tired from today’s events but Wooyoung, you and Mingi were still clearly awake.

You rest your hand over his, and you could feel him stiffen under your touch. Your fingers gently trace a few words over the back of his hand, over and over until he understands what you’re telling him. “I like you too.”

It takes so much strength for Mingi to not smile like the utter lovestruck fool that he was in the car right now. Instead of smiling or yelling, he takes your hand in his, lacing his fingers with yours. His thumb runs across the side of your hand, as much as he wants to press kisses to the back of your hand, this will have to do for now.

Wooyoung slows his car down outside your dorm, putting it on park as he wakes everyone up to give you, Mingi and Yunho way to get out of the car. “Have a good night!” He says as the three of you wave at those left in the car. The three of you tell them to stay safe. None of them catch how the two of you are now holding hands, except for Yunho. As the three of you watch the car drive off, Yunho quickly takes a photo of the two of you from the back.

“Mingi, I’ll go ahead. You take forever in the shower.” Yunho says, immediately leaving the two of you alone. Somehow, Yunho was a better wingman as compared to Wooyoung and San.

Now that the two of you were alone, you take the chance to verbalize what had transpired in the car. “I’m really sorry I didn’t say it outright, I didn’t want to go through our friends teasing us in public and I know how you like to stay low profile too so like--” You didn’t expect to have his lips on yours but you welcome them. Were they always that soft and sweet?

“You talk a lot you know?” Mingi mumbles when he pulls away from you. “It’s okay. I understand what you had to do but I do have to admit, you scared me back in the mall.” He admits as he straightens up.

“Get some sleep, I’ll wait for your stories about your work tomorrow.” He says before taking a few steps back, on the way to his place.

“Wait tomorrow?” That breaks you out of your thoughts.

“Yeah, tomorrow, 11AM. I’m taking you on our first date.” He leaves you with no room for complaints as he quickly jogs home. You touch your lips as you make your way to your dorm. It was your turn to feel flustered now, you could still feel his lips against yours and taste his slushie on your lips: blueberries and strawberries.

Looks like you had a new favorite flavor.

END

A/N: Do any of you guys want an epilogue? Just how y/n and mingi are years down the line, work and stuff like that lol. it won’t be long like this though lol.

#ateez scenarios #ateez fluff #ateez fanfictions #ateez fanfic #ateez x reader #mingi scenarios #mingi fluff #ateez mingi #my writings #ateez fanfiction #mingi x reader #uh what else do i tag this as

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missjanjie · 4 years

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Hold Me Tighter (Even Closer) | (3/?)

Title: Hold Me Tighter (Even Closer) Summary: A sequel to Hold Me Closer, Tiny Dancer. Brooke Lynn and Vanessa are back at NYU, but with new and improved positions. Brooke’s ready to start her career as a professor when, as fate would have it, she realizes her TA, Jackie, might have the hots for a student named Jan. The couple just might see it as a sign to give two new girls the love story they found in the same place. Word Count: ~2.9k (this chapter) / ~9k (total) Relationship(s): Branjie (Brooke Lynn Hytes/Vanessa Vanjie Mateo), Jankie (Jan Sport/Jackie Cox) Rating: E

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Brooke Lynn furrowed her brows and strummed her fingers against the table. “So, let me see if I’ve got this right – you invited Jan over to practice for her audition, got wine drunk, then dry-humped until she got off?”

Jackie nodded in confirmation, her eyes fixated more on her coffee cup than Brooke – she had to build back up to being able to make eye-contact. “Then in the morning she was gone and she left me a note,” she finished, holding the piece of paper up. “I really fucked up, didn’t I?”

“It wasn’t your smartest move,” she told her, trying not to laugh at the sheer absurdity of it all. “But if she just left like that, she’s probably just as scared as you are. Listen, the first day I met Vanessa was a mess. I walked her home from work that night, kissed her, and then literally ran away. She still makes fun of me for it.”

The story made Jackie laugh, but it caught her by surprise as well. She had always seen Brooke as someone so unshakably confident. “I guess if things worked out for you guys, all hope isn’t totally lost…” She took another sip from her drink and sighed. “I still don’t know how I’m going to face her in class on Monday,” she admitted.

Brooke reached across the table and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. “Just focus on your work. I promise I’ll find something to keep you busy, okay?” As much as she wanted to continue her matchmaking game, she could see that the tension needed to diffuse before she tried to push them closer. Just because Katya lucked out didn’t mean lightning would strike twice.

Jackie’s entire body relaxed in relief. She was still anxious about seeing Jan again, but it meant a lot to know that Brooke was looking out for her. “Okay. Yes, thank you. I can work with that.” She nodded, then checked her phone. “I have to get going, though. I’ll talk to you later,” she said as she gathered her things, including the note that she tucked into her pocket.

Brooke smiled and waved her off. She stayed put, though. She was expecting Vanessa any minute now. They liked meeting here when they could, after all, it was the café A’keria recently became the owner of, the same one she’d started working in after the Starbucks fiasco all those years ago. It was sentimental to them now.

“Hey boo,” Vanessa greeted as she walked in, leaning over and giving her wife a kiss before sitting down. “Must’ve just missed Jackie, how’s she doing?”

“The poor girl is going through it,” Brooke shook her head sympathetically. “She and Jan got drunk and fooled around, and Jan left before she woke up. She left a Post-It or something.”

Vanessa frowned and shook her head. “Mh-mm, I hate Post-Its. If you’re gonna dip, send a text like a normal person,” she mused.

“Maybe she thought a handwritten note would be more meaningful,” she reasoned. “Regardless, she’s just gonna need some time to recover before we continue with any matchmaking shenanigans.”

Vanessa gave a firm nod of agreement. “Understood.” She sat quietly for a moment, strumming her fingernails against the table. “I wanna talk about the baby thing.”

Brooke blinked in surprise at the abrupt subject change but leaned in to listen attentively nonetheless. “Of course, what’s on your mind?”

“Listen… I know we got good genes and all, but I don’t wanna create a baby in a lab when there are so many kids that need a family. I had friends in foster care when I was little, you know? That shit must’ve really sucked for them. And I just think… You and me are in a position to really help a kid out,” she told her, then held her breath as she waited for her wife’s response.

Brooke reached across the table and held Vanessa’s hands. “Baby girl, if that’s what you want, I am a hundred percent on board. I think that’s a wonderful motivation to adopt. We can start looking at agencies as soon or as late as you want. I’m in this with you all the way,” her thumb stroked over Vanessa’s wedding band. “That’s what I promised you. That’s the promise I make to you every day as your wife.”

Vanessa blinked and looked down. “Shit, you gonna make me cry,” she mumbled, giving Brooke’s hand a light squeeze to reassure her she was okay. “Guess we gotta think about redecorating the guest room then, huh?”

“You know my weakness for interior design,” she cooed, pressing a kiss to the back of Vanessa’s hand.

—

By the time Monday rolled around, Jackie had talked herself out of most of her anxiety. When the time was right, she thought, she could talk things out with Jan. But until then, she had a job to do, a job that she did like.

Jackie’s main task was to write a lot of information on the chalkboard. It was perfect as far as she was concerned – having her back to the class meant she didn’t have to worry about making awkward eye contact with Jan. She had to admit, it was kind of a genius move on Brooke’s part.

Jan, however, was left with a predicament of her own. She and Gigi had sat in the front because even with contacts or glasses, they were both nearsighted as all hell. However, this put Jackie right in her line of sight, and she immediately began regretting her decision.

While the dress Jackie wore came down to her knees, the fabric clung to her body in a way that accentuated some of her best physical features.

And Jan hadn’t meant to stare – staring was rude and her mother taught her better. But she would be damned if Jackie’s ass wasn’t hypnotizing her. She couldn’t help but wonder how she hadn’t noticed before.

“You’re gonna snap your pen in half with the way you’re biting it,” Gigi poked Jan’s shoulder, snapping her friend out of her trance. “Also, some subtlety really wouldn’t hurt you right now.”

Jan blushed, looking down at her notes, which were nowhere near as detailed as usual. “Don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Gigi chuckled. “Please, your eyes were about to burn a hole into her butt.”

“They were not, I was just reading the board,” she insisted, but now that she had to actively avoid staring, her body seemed all the more compelled to continue. She squeezed her eyes shut for a moment, trying to get her mind and body on the same page.

“Hey, you have good taste, I’m just saying be less obvious about it.”

Jan just buried her face in her notes, hoping that if she focused on getting work done, her mind would stop conjuring images of Jackie in various states of undress.

“...And that’ll just about do it,” Brooke Lynn was saying. “You guys are free to go, see you Wednesday.” She closed her book, punctuating the dismissal. Her eyes followed the students out of the room, waiting until they were alone before speaking to Jackie. “How are you feeling?”

Jackie exhaled deeply, dropping herself down onto the desk closest to Brooke’s as if she were dead weight. “I feel okay. I think not having to look at her made it easy. Have you seen her eyes? They’re so warm and brown and–”

“–And couldn’t stay off of you,” Brooke finished with a smirk. “Jackie, she is hot for you, you should’ve seen how she was staring at you. I already knew you have a great ass, but damn, it had a magnetic pull on that poor girl.”

Jackie turned a shade of red deeper and brighter than it had ever been. She suddenly became hyper-aware of her body, not necessarily in a self-conscious way – in fact, part of her was flattered – but it was overwhelming to process at first. “I guess she might not regret the other night that much then,” she managed with a strangled laugh.

“Honey, it’s pretty clear she wants a repeat performance. I wasn’t even paying all that much attention to her, but I swear I almost offered her a towel,” she chuckled.

Even though Jan was long gone, Jackie looked out of the classroom and into the hall, as if she could still catch sight of her. “I never thought I’d be relieved to be objectified,” she mused.

Brooke let out a light laugh at that. “So you’ll go talk to her?”

She shook her head as her gaze drifted back to the desk. “Not yet. Soon… Hopefully soon. I think I’ll know when I’m ready.”

—

“Well, other than you ogling the TA you fooled around with, I think today went well,” Gigi said as they walked back to the residence hall. “You ready for your audition later?”

“I wasn’t ogling her.” Jan chewed on her lip. “Don’t laugh, but…” She shifted awkwardly as she looked anywhere but directly at her friend. “I’m worried I might be too… distracted to nail it.”

Gigi looked at her friend with an arched brow. “First of all, yes you were. We established this. Second, you think you’ll be too horny to focus on singing?” She really did try her best not to laugh, but a small giggle slipped through. “Babe, just masturbate like a normal person before you go.”

She huffed. “Don’t you think I’ve thought of that? Lem’s probably gonna be in there, what am I supposed to do, tell her to leave so I can jerk off? We’re close, Geege, but I think there’s a line.”

“Then go in the shower. Jesus, do I have to spell it out for you?” Gigi rolled her eyes.

“You don’t think it’s weird to get off thinking about someone you’re not dating?” Jan asked quietly.

Her friend pinched the bridge of her nose. “At this point I just think you need to do it so you stop sounding so neurotic and paranoid. Hell, if I wasn’t in a committed relationship, I’d offer to help you out myself.”

Jan cocked her head to the side. “Thanks, I think.”

When Jan did get back to the dorm, she saw Lemon on her bed with her AirPods in, just as she’d anticipated. She waved at her to get her attention, waiting for her to take one of them out. “Hey sweetie, I’m just gonna shower before my audition. You know, get nice and calm,” she told her.

Lemon smiled and nodded. “Oh shit, I forgot that was today. Break a leg! But like, not in the shower. That would be bad.”

Jan chuckled as she grabbed what she needed to bring into the bathroom. “I don’t know where I’d be without your wisdom, doll,” she winked playfully before leaving.

The first thing Jan did once she got in the shower was put music on – this wasn’t her first rodeo, so to speak. Even with earbuds in, she knew she ran the risk of Lemon hearing her moan if she didn’t drown it out. With the music playing and water running, Jan undressed and stepped into the shower, letting out a sigh of relief the second the hot water hit her body.

After she washed her hair, Jan leaned against the shower wall, resting her head against the cool tile. She let her hand travel down her body. There was a moment of hesitation when her fingers grazed over her pussy, but after a deep breath, she began rubbing her clit with two fingers. Her eyes fluttered shut as soft, breathy moans slipped out.

“Fuck…” Jan wasn’t thinking about anything at first, but without even trying, her thoughts drifted to Jackie, to what happened the other night, to that day in class. And once she got started, there was no chance of stopping. “Oh, Jackie…” she moaned, rocking against her fingers. Her free hand went to her breast, groping it, and tweaking her nipple.

By the time her orgasm hit, Jan needed to rest her entire weight against the wall to keep herself up. Her legs were shaking and she was whimpering, taking deep breaths as she finally felt sturdy enough to stand back upright. After that, she just did a quick wash off her face and body before getting out and drying off, going back into the bedroom wrapped up in her robe shortly after.

“Hey, feeling any better?” Lemon asked casually. It was clear she hadn’t moved an inch this whole time, nor was she aware of what Jan had gotten up to.

“Much better, actually,” Jan nodded, taking the towel wrap off of her head and combing her hair out. “What’s your plan for the rest of the day?” she asked as she continued getting ready.

Lemon paused her music and took out her earbuds, she had been waiting for an opportunity to talk about herself. “Actually, I’m meeting up with a girl later.” She didn’t wait for Jan to ask before she continued. “Okay, so, like, I had just lit a joint and I see this really pretty girl – tall, you know how I like ‘em – and she seems hella stressed, so I offer her a hit. So, we’re smoking and chatting and long story short, we have a date tonight.”

“That was the short version?” Jan teased as she got dressed. “I’m guessing it'll be more of the same?”

She scoffed. “No… We’ll probably fuck too.”

Jan laughed softly as she straightened her hair, then pulled it up into a high ponytail. “Well, it’s always nice to have an itinerary,” she hummed. “I’ll see you later.”

—

“Next!”

Jan stepped onto the stage and held herself with confidence. She introduced herself, handed the sheet music to the pianist, and then she simply did what she did best; she sang. She gave it her all, emoting all the right words, belting all the right notes. There was a lingering rush of adrenaline when she finished. “Thank you,” she smiled politely and made her way off stage.

“Great job up there,” a distinct voice out of seemingly nowhere caused Jan to jump, startled.

“Oh, thanks Vanjie,” Jan smiled, running her fingers through her ponytail. “I didn’t realize anyone other than the directors were watching.”

Vanessa shrugged. “People gave up tryna tell me what to do a long time ago. Except for Brooke, but there’s always an exception for the wife. But anyway… you feelin’ okay? I don’t know all the details, but I know you had a rough weekend.”

Of course, Jan figured Vanessa knew more than she let on – she could safely assume Jackie told Brooke, and Brooke told Vanessa. But she hoped some details had gotten lost in translation. “Oh, yeah, I guess,” she bounced awkwardly on the balls of her feet. “Things are a little weird, I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“Listen, I’ve been in your shoes. The worst thing you can do is overthink it. Brooke did it, Jackie does it, and I get the vibe you do too. Not everything’s as deep as y’all make it out to be, you know?”

Jan chewed her lip and nodded. Sure, she knew Vanessa was right, but it was easier said than done. It wasn’t something she could simply stop doing, something she could just turn on and off at will. “The situation’s just… It’s complicated. But I get what you’re saying, I do,” she assured. “All I wanna focus on now is being able to sleep tonight so I can be ready to see if I got a callback tomorrow.”

Vanessa gave Jan’s arm a gentle, reassuring squeeze. “You got this. Ain’t no one around you doubting that.”

And Jan tried her best to take that to heart, she tried to stay positive the rest of the night, to turn her brain off when it was finally time to sleep. She was pretty sure she passed out at nearly three in the morning, but as soon as her alarm went off, she shot right out of bed.

Lemon rolled onto her side, watching Jan scramble to get ready with energy from god knows where. “How the fuck do you do that?” she mumbled groggily.

Jan shrugged as she brushed her hair. “It’s a blessing and a curse, Lem.” She checked her phone. “The callback list should be up by the time I get there,” she murmured, offering a quick goodbye to her roommate before she was out the door.

By the time she got to the auditorium, there was already a small group of hopeful actors forming outside the doors. And as soon as the list went up, they all crowded around it.

Too impatient to wait, Jan made her way to the front, offering haphazard apologies to everyone she bumped out of the way. It was worth it for the happiness and relief she felt when she saw that she was on the callback list for Veronica.

The first thing she did was call Gigi and did her best to not scream into the phone. “I got a callback! And there were only two other girls listed for Veronica, Geege, I’m this close to getting it. I can taste it.”

“That’s my girl, I knew you’d crush it,” Gigi replied. “You’re gonna nail the callback too, and don’t be afraid to take my advice again if you need it.”

Jan furrowed her brows. “How did you know I followed your advice?”

Gigi had a smug grin that Jan swore she could feel through the phone. “I didn’t.”

#jankie #branjie #rpdr fanfiction #rpdr fanfic #rpdr rpf

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lovecomedy · 5 years

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Fanfic recommendations nobody asked for

Those are my favorite wincest fic ever, just because. They are all complete. I’ll add the summaries together with my own two cents.

Consider the Hairpin Turn by cherie_morte. 27K Words

AU of 6x22: Sam's wall has shattered and the memories in his mind have splintered. When the Sam who remembers Hell tells him to go find Jess and be happy, Sam knows he can't stay while Dean needs him. But when the Sam from Hell says that Dean is already there looking for him, Sam leaves his memories of the pit behind to find him.

What he finds is a life he doesn't remember: a house that he shares with his brother (and has for years), a law career he thought he'd left behind at Stanford, and a relationship with Dean he never dreamed he could have. Life is almost too good to be true, at least until Sam begins to hear his brother's voice calling to him, begging him to wake up.

This is my favorite fic of all times. It’s beautifuly written. The way that it narrates Sam’s trauma of Hell is what keeps me coming back for more . Honestly it should be published as a book. Don’t worry, it has very happy scenes and there’s a happy ending

Welcome to the Neighborhood by ImogenPortchester. 2K Words

Dean thinks the new neighbors are interesting, but all is not what it seems.

Super short. Super heartbreaking.

Fics by leonidaslion

I mean first off, just read everything written by leonidaslion

Sing Your Hymns Like Angels In Defeat. 32K Words.

And Lucifer Fell for a second time with the burning brilliance of a star. The Flare shone in his wake, and darkness fell upon the land ...

Dean goes blind, and I love how it describes Dean’s stuggles with it. You feel like you’re blind with him. Really, really, REALLY well written. Should probably also be a book

Fumbling in the Dark: Love Advice For the Romantically Impaired. 72K

True Love really is blind...

It’s basically a character study of every single episode of the first 5 seasons, with a wincest twist. Slow burn. Holy shit, is it a slow burn.

Just Say My Name. 3K Words

Dean turns into a complete and utter nympho. It takes Sam a while to notice the difference.

Funny, lighthearted and porny

Hush. 2K Words

Motel walls are thin...

Discovery!kink. Sam and Dean try to have quiet sex while John is in the other room. At least, Dean is trying

Sam Winchester and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day. 15K Words

Sometimes, you just shouldn't get out of bed in the morning ...

Fics by fleshflutter

Dark Side of the Moon. 20K Words

Cursed!Dean is deaf and blind. Sam deals.

The incestuous courtship of the antichrist's bride. 48K Words

Sam is trying to become the Antichrist in order to save the world. He has a small army of angels and demons, he has an adoring cult, he has a work of prophecy by Jack Kerouac, and he has Dean. Things are going pretty well until he accidentally signs Dean up as his Beloved Consort, a role that requires sex with the Antichrist on an altar. And that's when things stop going pretty well. Also, the soundtrack to the Apocalypse sucks.

I don’t like crack fics, but goddamn this one is FUNNY. You can tell a lot of thought was put into this freaking masterpiece

Captured by the Game by rivkat. 54K Words

AU. Azazel has given his favorite son a task: worm his way into the confidence of a hunter. It sounds simple, but Dean Winchester just might be more than Sam can handle.

It wasn’t real by NaughtyPastryChef. 1K Words

Sam is trying to explain to Dean where he was when Dean was stuck in purgatory. It starts with "I hit a dog" and then, suddenly, inexplicably, they both know exactly where Sam was.

Wonderful explanation for that arc in season 8 nobody can stand. Plus, time travel, which I’m always a sucker for

Backseat of My Brother's 67 Chevy by NaughtyPastryChef. 1K Words

Extended scene from "Baby". Dean's feeling proud of Sam's hookup until he hears that Sam tried to give that waitress his number. Uncharacteristically, he lets Sam force him to talk about it.

Bury My Old Soul, and Dance on its Grave by dreamlittleyo. 2K Words

Dean knows how far he can push Sam.

Antichrist!Sam and Consort!Dean. Codependent winchesters. Yeah

Graveside Blues by hunenka. 3K Words

He uses his body like a blanket, like a shield.

I like how protective Sam is of Dean here, and it deals with something I don’t see a lot such as the jealousy he would have of Dean’s bond with Amara

own it by orphan_account. 6K Words

But he's never going to be able to burn the image of Sam cradling one hand around the perfect curve of Dean's face, dropping the other to the cut of Dean's hip (made for fingers and tongues to trail down, to taste), walking Dean backward until Dean is flush against the wall and Sam is flush against him. This is something that can't be denied.

John finds out. Explores the wonderful trope of both Sam and his father being possessive of Dean, and being very antagonistical to each other. Dysfunctional family yay. Also very porny

Fics by astolat

Punxsutawney. 9K Words

* astolat thinks any plot worth doing is worth doing TWICE

This is the Mistery Spot plot, but a little different. Sam AND Dean wake up to the same day over and over again. So they talk.

Kings and Queens and Jokers, Too. 4K Words

"Yeah, you boys nailed that trickster real good," Bobby said, dry as dust.

People are acting weird around the brothers. Can’t really say anything else without spoiling it. Listen just do yourself a favor and read it.

options. 500 Words

Decisions, decisions.

Short and funny. Little bit porny

Desired. 2K Words

He hadn't even known about any of this himself until Sam found it, figured it out for him. He hadn't known how it was going to be.

So, smut. They have a better time when Dean is the one who asks for it

Rockabye Sammy... by AnotherWorld3111. 1K Words

Sam can’t sleep, so Dean tries to help.

Sam keeps hallucinating Lucifer. Dean is worried and protective of him. Porny

We Know Each Other As We Always Were by mickeym. 45K Words

In 1941, while the world is at war, Sam Winchester falls in love with his brother. They're young, they're in love, and in spite of the hardships of life around them, the world is a pretty good one for them. Until Dec. 7th, 1941, when Japan launches an air attack on Pearl Harbor, sending the US to war against Japan. Dean Winchester feels he needs to join the Army; needs to help fight the good fight and help save lives. He promises he'll return, but can he keep that promise?

GAH this is so romantic! It’s an AU, but I feel like they’re very in character. It feels like a novel

For The End of My Broken Heart by Wickedtruth. 59K Words

Dad's disappeared and Sam's left to pick up the pieces of his broken brother. Post Devil's Trap AU.

Very codependent Winchesters. Also John finds out.

here at the end of all things by remy (iamremy). 40K Words

AU from Season 12 onwards. The British Men of Letters win in the USA, and slowly manage to establish their bases and authority over the whole country. They also capture Sam Winchester and keep him prisoner for eleven months, experimenting on him regularly before wiping his memories so that he has no idea what has been done to him.

Even after Dean rescues him and they begin planning to get revenge once and for all, the niggling doubt at the back of Sam's head remains -- what did they do to him? Why won't his anxiety get better? And what is it that he's missing?

Ok you got me, this is gen. But the whole fic feels like a (good) Supernatural episode, it’s so realistic and canon-like. The relationship between the brothers is just like the one we see on the show, meaning desperately codependent and wincest in every subtext.

Fics by deadlybride / zmediaoutlet

What I like about @zmediaoutlet is that she takes the time to write everyone in character. It’s always as canonical as possible and it feels real

femme. 4K Words

Rummaging around the internet, Dean finds a kink he hadn't seen before; Sam explains, and demonstrates.

I love feminization, but unfourtunately there’s only one fic that does it right, and it’s this one

gratification. 2K Words

It's not a compulsion. Dean just likes it.

breña. 1K Words

Sam and Dean wait, knowing what's coming.

The night before Sam jumps in the box

not the good things, nor the bad. 20K

Dean wavers in a grey area between being taken and giving in.

Part of it started with the kinks series, but you can read this just fine without the other parts. It deals very beautifully with Dean’s thoughts regarding his bond with Amara and his sexuality

DeMille Has Nothing On Us by HandsAcrossTheSea. 13K Words

"Hey Dean - wanna film it?"

This is part of the Those Hazy Days I Do Remember series, but you can 100% read it as a stand-alone, no problem. Sam and Dean film each other and this has that season 1 vibe, of just two brothers on the road. It’s slightly OOC, just because of how touchy-feely they are. But that’s something I sometimes wish we could have on the show, anyway

How many floors to realize by Lazy Daze. 26K Words

AU from the end of It’s A Terrible Life, in which Zachariah decides to keep stringing them along a little while longer, because damn if they aren’t somewhat entertaining, right?”

Rabid by i-am-therefore-i-fight

Beautiful!! I love @i-am-therefore-i-fight‘s take on demon!dean. It’s different to what we’re used to. This fic is very angsty but has a happy ending

Bitten by a True Believer by kermiethefrog. 3K Words

“C’mon, Sammy,” Dean says. Flashes him a wicked grin, charcoal-eyes. The way he spreads out on Sam’s mattress, bare and offering himself up like Holy fucking Communion, drums heat under Sam’s skin, and he’s never sure if it’s arousal or anger when he’s faced with the demon. “Show me a good time, big guy.”

Another demon!dean fic. I like how even as he is a demon, he is still desperate for Sam’s attention

The Time Traveler's Brother by AmyPond45. 54K Words

Dean's life is turned upside down the night his mother dies. But that's also the night a mysterious grown-up version of Dean's brother first appears in his life. While Dean grows up, "Old Sam" is often there, especially when Dean's father isn't. As Dean learns what the future holds, he begins to question everything his father has taught him about who he is and what he is supposed to become. Can Dean find a way to save his little brother from his own future?

This is based on The Time Traveler’s Wife, which is my favorite book. Don’t worry, you don’t have to have read it to understand this fic

need against need against need by dollylux. 5K Words

Jack spends his first night in the bunker with Sam and Dean. (Jack POV)

Don’t worry, Jack just watches and ponders about the Winchester’ realationship

the centre cannot hold by orphan_account. 6K Words

Sam does not remember; Dean does. All Dean can do is watch, and mourn.

But then Castiel becomes God, and the world starts to break at the edges (and maybe that isn't a bad thing.)

It kinda becomes a character study, while the brothers deal with what happened during the Soulless!Sam period

The Last Temptation by bccalling. 1K Words

When Sam tells Mary about all the things he and Dean get up to in the dark, Mary wants in, and Sam sees his opportunity to make Dean’s every fantasy come true.

Mary shows up. Porny and very sweet

Angels and Demons by OhWilloTheWisp. 9K Words

AU angels and demons are animals. Sam was not happy when his owner, Ruby, left him boarded at a kennel. He was even less happy when he discovered an angel in the same facility. But his encounter with the angel will end much differently than anyone would have guessed. He may have never expected his mate to be angel, but now that's found him he won't let anyone keep them apart.

Sam and Dean are kinda like animals here but there’s nothing sexual. It’s very sweet and romantic. Anna/Ruby in here as well

#wincest #fic rec #leonidaslion #fleshflutter #astolat #full house of wincest #bottom!dean #zmediaoutlet

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irisrecs · 4 years

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buzzfeed unsolved fanfiction recommendations

This is all Ryan/Shane— so don’t like, don’t read.

PSA: I am not in any way stating that Ryan and Shane from Buzzfeed Unsolved and Watcher are together, or that I want them to be together; this is for entertainment use only. I urge you to not contact them or @ them on twitter or instagram making comments about their relationship, as they are humans just like the rest of us. Some things are none of our business!

This is a masterlist of my favourite fanfictions in this fandom! Thanks to @gigaledom for cheering me on. Never thought I was going to do more RPF, but here I am.

Under 10k

and i’m puffing my chest, getting red in the face by pissedofsandwich- 6k, Teen

Summary: "Zack's going to be there?" Shane asks, masking his... whatever it is he's feeling in his chest, with nonchalance.

Ryan blinks. "Yes?"

Well, never mind dancing with the fucking sun. He’s Icarus, wings melted and falling face-first into the asphalt.

Or: Shane is definitely not at all jealous of how close Zack and Ryan are getting during the making of Sports Conspiracies. Except that he is.

My notes: They’re both so jealous of each other and so bad at communication. Thank goodness they have their friends to help them out! Really funny and entertaining!

lay your demons at the door by abovetheruins— 7k, Teen and Up

Summary: Ryan had been so careful. For months he had learned to train his face into a semblance of normalcy every time a spirit got too close or he was overwhelmed with some indiscernible emotion on location. He had learned to channel his fear into something more manageable, something entertaining enough for the cameras but not so severe that anyone would be able to tell he wasn’t just jumping at shadows or groaning floorboards anymore.

Shane wasn’t supposed to find out. He wasn't supposed to know.

My Notes: The Seer!Ryan AU that I wasn’t expecting to like so much. A lot of pining and caring! Shane with a lovely ending!

First Impressions by luxbuhree— 9k, Mature

Summary: The chance to work with and sit next to THE Shane Madej was one of the things Ryan was looking forward to, now that he's starting his first day in BuzzFeed. But while he was expecting a charming and friendly guy, he was instead met with someone who couldn't care any less.

Will the case of why Shane hates Ryan remain unsolved?

My notes: In which Shane is really bad at feelings and Ryan has the hots for a certain person who pins him against walls. Awesome ending.

a short history of almost something by cooliohoolio— 6k, No Warnings

Summary: "I think I'll wait another year."

Shane's in love with Ryan, and will get around to telling him. One of these days.

My notes: A lovely short high school! AU with mutual pining. They’re best friends ahhh

only happy accidents by barnes— 8k, Explicit

Summary: In hindsight, Shane is too old to have thought that friends with benefits was something that the two of them would be able to pull off. He’s had friends with benefits before that worked beautifully, but they were not with people whose jobs were tied up in his own, whose friendships were as closely interwoven into Shane’s everyday life as Ryan’s is. He’d thought these were the very things that could keep it from getting weird, because they were such good buddies, Ryan would be solidly cemented as his pal that nothing could shift him.

This was a miscalculation, on Shane’s part.

My Notes: I’m not usually a fan of friends with benefits to lovers, but this had so much mutual pining and fluff that I enjoyed it so much! A must-read.

Gurl, Imma Marry You (ryan is a mess) by orphan_account— 2k, General Audiences

Summary: Ryan is perpetually doing dumb things. Starting a ghost show? Dumb. Going to demon houses? Dumb. Talking to ghosts? Dumb.

But those are all new dumb things. Ryan's known he wants to marry Shane forever. That is an incredibly old dumb thing.

My notes: Really cute and fluffy and I love it so much. It’s a kind of read-to-make-yourself-feel-better kind of fic!

Por Favor, Sweetheart by carrieonfighting— 8k, Teen and Up

Summary: Two dorks raise a baby and don't even realise they're doing it together until it's too late

Alternatively, Ryan Bergara is Trying His Best Thanks

My notes: Normally not a raising-a-child-fic person, but holy smokes this was written so well and the fluff! the domesticity i-

Pushing All Your Buttons by beethechange— 9k, Explicit

Summary: Ryan and Shane get stuck in an elevator at Buzzfeed HQ. There is tension. They relieve the tension. That’s it, that’s the fic.

My notes: I was literally able to see the tension floating off my laptop in front of my face, it was so palpable.

Under 20k

like you want to be loved by poetdameron— 16k, Teen and Up

Summary: "Settle down with me", Shane says without thinking and as Ryan looks at him with wide open eyes, all he can think of it's how many of Ryan's secrets he knows, how Ryan likes his coffee, and the fact that he has loved him since the moment Ryan first looked up at him and smiled.

My notes: The PINING and CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT and ANGST my god. Really well written and lovely happy ending.

ships that pass in the night by beethechange— 20k, Explicit

Summary: The more Ryan thinks about it, the more he thinks he just needs to return the favor, that’s all. And then it’ll be done, like it was meant to be done weeks ago, and they can both move on for real.

It’s not that he wants to. It’s that he won’t be able to stop thinking about it until he evens the score. He has to restore balance to the Force or order to the universe, or—or whatever. It’s a karma thing.

“I think you have to let me jerk you off,” Ryan tells Shane one night. They’re working late, alone in the Watcher office, one of many such late nights these days.

“Wh—here?” Shane asks. He looks around, baffled, like he’ll have been magically transported somewhere else. “Have to?” And then: “Let you?”

My notes: haha what if I dare you to jerk me off dude haha don’t be a chicken

Do you not know how love works? by leylines— 12k, No Rating

Summary: “Fuck you, man,” Ryan growled, rubbing his tailbone where he landed on when he fell down just moments ago.

“I’m pretty sure that’s what Devon already thinks we’re doing,” Shane said cheerfully, not at all sounding bothered by the thought.

“Oh shut up, dude.”

My notes: One of my favourite things in this cold, dark universe is when two characters are dating but they don’t know it but everyone else does. This is so hilarious and warms my dead heart

Full-Court Press by beethechange— 12k, Explicit

Summary: To be clear, these are not tactics Ryan would recommend. Being an athleisure-obsessed pervert, and lying, and clothes-sabotage: these are not things he’s proud of.

But they have undeniably worked.

Shane’s standing next to him in the hotel lobby while Devon checks them all out of their rooms, and he's wearing a sleeveless purple Lakers jersey and the world’s softest, clingiest sweatpants. It’s so exactly as Ryan pictured it, so precisely in line with his fantasies, that he has to pinch himself.

My notes: Really hot and funny and p i n i n g

may your days be merry and bright by bodhirookes— 19k, General Audiences

Summary: “Your turn, Ry Ry.”

Ryan looks down to find only one piece of paper remaining. “Wow, so much selection to choose from.”

“No time for your negativity, Scrooge. Your Secret Santa deserves a better attitude.”

Ryan sticks his tongue out, but takes the slip of paper. He’s loudly yelling Give me Jen, please please please give me Jen as he unfolds it, but he’s too busy begging for her to be truly prepared for what he ends up getting:

A simple but damning SHANE in Andrew’s scribbly handwriting.

Or, Ryan gets Shane for Secret Santa and has a subsequent breakdown about what to get him

Notes: This is so sweet and cute and I would die for both of them. A lovely classic christmas fic!

want you in my room by beethechange— 13k, Explicit

Summary: As they watch, Tall Guy takes his beanie off, revealing a mess of thick, shiny brown hair. He runs his hand through it to shake out the hat hair and Ryan feels like he’s stuck in an Herbal Essences commercial, except he’s the one making inappropriate lustful noises.

Ryan adjusts his snapback, determined. He is, after all, wearing his very finest basketball shorts, without even a single hole at the hem, and the knowledge puts an extra spring in his step.

“I’m gonna climb that dude like a tree,” he tells Curly.

My notes: Just really dumb, cute pining in a wonderful frat boy/nerd college AU!

Long boys

Muscles Better and Nerves More by beethechange— 26k, Explicit

Summary: “I’m serious,” Ryan says. “Don’t go fucking up my body. I want that shit back in the same condition I left it.”

“The same condition—Ryan. I’m not spending hours in a gym every day so you don’t lose muscle mass.”

“I want you to treat my body with the respect you would a national park. Leave nothing but footprints, take nothing but memories.”

***

A certain meddling Voodoo Queen of New Orleans thinks Ryan and Shane need some new perspective on life. After an inadvisable ritual deposits Ryan in Shane’s body, and Shane in Ryan’s, the ghoulboys pursue some soul-searching and self-discovery to put things right. Sometimes in a sexy way.

My notes: This is so sexy and in character! A freaky friday kinda scenario where they only switch back when they pull their figurative heads out of their asses. So wonderful.

Dreams to be daring for by allonsy_gabriel— 24k, General Audiences

Summary: On May 11, 2018, Eleanora Rose Austin was born in Chicago, Illinois.

On May 20, 2018, Shane Alexander Madej agreed to act as the godfather to his best friend from college's daughter.

On October 26, 2018, Olivia and Michael Austin were victims of a mugging gone sideways.

On October 29, 2018, Shane Madej found himself in the possession of one real, actual, human child.

My notes: Accidental Baby Acquisition is now my favourite trope because of this fic. The fact that they’re already acting like a couple with the baby before they actually become one is sooo beautiful,,, give it a read im begging you

Fifty Shades of Gold by beethechange— 21k, Explicit

Summary: Shane tires of doing the same bits over and over. He tires of telling the same stories until they all, him and Ryan and the fans, have every beat memorized. Whenever Ryan pulls out his Ricky Goldsworth impression, ah yes, that old chestnut, Shane plays along only begrudgingly. He’s bored.

That’s his official position: he’s over Ricky Goldsworth.

Shane’s unofficial position, regrettably, is that he’d rather be under Ricky Goldsworth.

My notes: Shane’s got the hots for Ricky Goldsworth and that’s the TEA. Lots of sexual tension and cute and unsure! Ryan!

Precious metals by StrikerEureka— 73k, Mature

Summary: Ryan and Shane have been moving around something that is coming to a head between them. After a car accident, on the way to an investigation, Ryan slowly starts to become suspicious that Shane might not be what he seems. He realizes, though, that he just might not care.

Shane sits forward suddenly. “Hey, pull over up here.”

Ryan follows the instruction without questioning it, which probably says something about either his willingness to listen to Shane or his sanity. Maybe both; they go hand in hand. He puts on his blinker, even though they haven’t seen another car in a couple of minutes, and pulls off onto the shoulder.

“Are you gonna puke or something?” he asks, putting the car into park, as Shane takes off his seatbelt with one hand and tugs off his Ray Bans with the other.

“You better hope not,” he murmurs as he leans over the center console and kisses Ryan solidly on the mouth.

My notes: My favourite Demon!Shane AU ever! Really sweet and loads of tension and pining... must-read.

darling it’s a faded notion by varnes— 28k, Explicit

Summary: The sun is too bright and Ryan’s whole body is alight with something that is eating him all the way up from the inside out, but he keeps his eyes open and he makes himself look, and he tells himself that once he finds Shane, he’ll think about it. Once he finds Shane, they’ll make a plan. Once he finds Shane, and only then, he’ll let himself have the thought he’s been swallowing down like bile since he came to: that they didn’t fall.

They were pushed.

OR: Ryan and Shane get cursed by a ghost, and now they can't be not-touching. It's ... not great.

My notes: They get cursed and have to be touching all the time!! and they’re pining so hard y’all like what more could one want

Bed-warm Hands and the Ghost of Elvis by MiraclesofPaul— 21k, Teen and Up

Summary: They get used to sharing a bed while filming the show. Ryan's just trying not to let his feelings get in the way.

So Ryan tells himself he’s going to ride out whatever it is they’ve fallen into, but he’ll bow out gracefully when the time comes. He can just enjoy the now.

My notes: They share a bed!!! And their hearts!! so much lack of communication, it’s wonderful

Hope that someone will enjoy these fics that I did so very much! If you want more buzzfeed unsolved fics let me know because i’ve read sooo much fanfiction...

—Iris

#iris recs #fanfic recs #fanfiction #long post #buzzfeed unsolved #shyan #shyan fanfiction #shyan masterpost #pining #long fic #getting together #short fic #skeptic believer

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moondustis · 5 years

Text

the louvre (m)

pairing: jung jaehyun + reader genre: angst, smut, fluff word count: 9k warnings: unhealthy behavior, discussion of depression and anxiety. summary: “On the nights you spend alone the feeling of loneliness is not as comfortable as it used to be. It’s like Jaehyun has engraved himself in every part of your life, trying to fit in inside every empty spot you had.” song rec: are you bored yet? - wallows / tardes que nunca acabam - baco exu do blues

'Cause we could stay at home and watch the sunset But I can't help from asking, "Are you bored yet?" And if you're feeling lonely you should tell me Before this ends up as another memory Will you tell the truth so I don't have to lie? Will you tell the truth so I don't have to lie?

If there is one thing that’s familiar to you is loneliness. You’ve known it for ages and have known it in its rawest and cruelest forms.

At sixteen your parents get a divorce. You saw it coming, of course, all the fights you grew up listening to had to come to an end at some point. You move in with your mother and when you come home from school she has already left work. by the time she arrived you’re already fast asleep.

It gets lonely pretty fast and you find out that you’re not the best at dealing with it. It starts slow, you’re crying for no apparent reason and there’s a sadness in the bottom of your stomach that wants to claw its way up. Then it’s hard waking up in the morning so you just skip class, one day then another, then a whole week. It’s hard finding things that excite you and you stop talking to all of your friends because why bother.

Loneliness eats you alive and you let it. spending most of the time asleep or dozing off from medication you shouldn’t be taking, you waste your teen years just like that, barely graduating. Barely making it.

At nineteen you don’t really know what to do with your life, applying to colleges you are sure you won’t pass and still sleeping more than you should. You fight a lot with your mother and you want desperately to get away. You’re still lonely but now it doesn’t bother you that much anymore.

At twenty you get into college to study art, the only thing that seemed to spark something inside of you. You move away to a dorm room that’s so tiny you can’t share it with anyone. You prefer it that way.

You got so used to being alone that anything other than that makes you antsy, makes you want to cry and hide and never leave your bedroom again. You make few friends and go out very rarely and when the therapeut you attend once asks if you’re okay you cry until you feel empty again.

At twenty you meet Jung Jaehyun.

You feel out of place at the party you are, can of beer feeling cold in your hand and music too loud. You wish you were drunk. Your friend, Taeyong, had abandoned you just a minute ago with the excuse of finding the person he was interested in and telling you to have a good time.

You should have left, of course. but you don’t and Jaehyun finds you by yourself on a couch. He introduces himself with his dimples in your face and offers to keep you company. You shouldn’t have let him.

One drink and you’re laughing at something he says. Another and his hand moves to your thigh. Another and he’s kissing you and then, as if you’ve lost all the control in your body, you let him take your virginity on a stranger’s bed.

That’s problem number one. Problem number two is that jaehyun is too sweet, too gentle. He treats you with a care that you don’t think you deserve. He calls you baby and swallows your moans with his tongue and you feel out of breath. It’s too much and all you need at the same time. You hate it.

Problem number three is that he texts you the next morning. You can’t even remember how he got your number in the first place, deciding to ignore it. You like being alone, it’s better like this.

☾

Winter hits hard this year and you curse yourself for not buying gloves as you walk down campus, your hands stuffed around your pockets. You try to walk as fast as you can, wanting to reach the heat of the classroom for surrealism and finally be able to feel your freezing hands again.

It hasn’t snowed yet, just low temperatures for now, making everyone wish that when it finally comes it’s so devastating that finals have to be cancelled. You pass a girl that you had class with last semester, avoiding her eyes and the possibility of a boring conversation about the weather.

Your phone vibrates in your pocket and you don’t have to see to know it’s Taeyong wanting to make sure you are not still in your bed. You didn’t really want to attend class today but if you skipped another time he would come beat at your door and force you outside. You take it off your pocket, your hand freezing just a little bit more, and text him a quick okay.

What happens next could’ve probably been avoided if you were paying attention to where you were going. But you’re not, so you bump right into the poor person that had the misfortune of being in your way.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry…” You start saying, cutting yourself short when you see who it is. With a little surprised look on his face, Jaehyun stands there looking at you and you pray to all the gods that he doesn’t remember just exactly who you are.

He does, of course. “_________.” He says, almost excitedly and smiles at you while fixing the beanie in his head. He looks like you remember him from last time, with the dimples and soft eyes.

“Hi.” Is your clever response because you have no idea what you should be saying to the boy that took your virginity. Who you then proceeded to ignore for a whole month. “It’s been a while.”

“Yeah…” You wonder if this is as awkward for him as it is for you. You feel a cold breeze hit you and soon you’ll probably not feel your nose anymore. “You never replied to my texts, I kept wondering if I did something wrong.”

He looks nervous, biting on his bottom lip and shifting the weight from his legs from one foot to the other. You feel something in the pit of your stomach that is probably guilty. “You didn’t!” You say a little too loudly, hands moving as you speak. “I mean, I just got busy with projects, that’s why I never replied. I’m really sorry, you really didn’t do anything wrong.”

“Oh, okay then. That’s a relief.” He says, still looking nervous but more relieved now. “Did you manage to finish all of the projects?”

“Yes.” Why didn’t you lie, that’s what you should’ve done. Tell him that you would be busy for the rest of your life. “Just waiting for finals week.”

There’s a pause, like he’s pondering if he should say what he wants and you wait for the ground to swallow you whole, to end your suffering. Your phone vibrates again in your pocket, probably Taeyong cursing you for being late. You keep your eyes to the ground, avoiding his.

“I… we… maybe we can go out sometime, if you would like.” He tumbles over with his words, in a cute manner. “ I mean, since you’re not busy anymore.”

You’re stupid, that’s what you are. And you can’t say no to people, not when they have puppy eyes and are cute like Jung Jaehyun. So you say yes, promising you’ll reply to his texts this time when he sends you a day and place for the date.

You curse yourself and stupid Jung Jaehyun when you get to class, twenty minutes late, to the door already closed. You get in and try to walk in as silent as you can, keeping your head low until you get to your sit besides a very angry looking Taeyong.

“Why are you late?” He half whispers, half shouts, getting looks from the people sitting next to you but thankfully not the teacher, that continues to talk about René Magritte and his influences.

“Can you please keep quiet?” you whisper back, voice annoyed. “It’s not my fault Jung Jaehyun made me late.”

Taeyong looks at you like you just said the most scandalous thing in the world, ever the overreacter. “Jaehyun? As in that Jaehyun you completely ignored for a whole month?” The urge you have to hit your head on the table is overwhelming.

“Yes, exactly him.” You sigh, trying to focus on the teacher but you know for a fact you won’t be able until you spill out every single detail to your best friend.

“And?”

“I gave him a stupid excuse to why I never replied and guess what? He believed me and had the nerve to ask me on a date.” You get the words out as quickly and low as possible. “So now you have to help me get out of this mess without hurting the poor man.”

There’s a look in his eyes that you can’t quite pinpoint, maybe pity. Whatever it is, it irritates you a bit. “My sweet dear, _____. I’m not gonna help you ruin your chance of getting boned again.” He whispers, reaching out to hold your hands affectionately. “ And your chance of getting to know someone besides me.”

You met Taeyong on your freshman year at one of the introductory classes you had and from the moment he said something nice to you, you stuck to him like glue. He was sweet and caring enough to let you build yourself a little home of sorts inside his life and became your closest friend ever. You had made other friends of course but it was never that meaningful or that lasting.

“What? I know plenty of people beside you. I just talked to Jungwoo and Sicheng yesterd-.” You mutter under your breath.

“They don’t matter.” Taeyong cuts you off, dropping your hands from his hold. “You’re going to this date, even if I have to drag you there.”

All you can do is roll your eyes, muttering a “whatever” before you are turning to face the teacher and finally pay attention in class.

But it’s not like you can pay much attention to it, the numerous slides of surreal paintings and confusing european names forgotten by your overthinking of what will happen on friday.

Later, when you get a text from an unknown number with stupid emojis, the butterflies in your stomach go mad. You ignore them but reply to the text.

“Yeah, friday sounds great :-)”

☾

Friday comes in a blink.

You don’t see the time pass, with your many classes and finals studies keeping you busy. You could have said that you completely forgot about the date but Jaehyun kept texting you all week, keeping a nice conversation about anything that came to mind. He was nice, pleasant to talk to and funny in a lame way that entertained you to no end. It was unusual for you to be interested, almost excited, about talking to someone.

That doesn’t stop the dread that sets in your heart when friday night comes and Taeyong annoyingly texts you asking if you are already ready for the date. You are in fact, standing in front of your mirror with a frown with your face, the skirt feeling too alien and the makeup on your face feeling like too much, even though it’s barely nothing. You don’t know why exactly you’re putting so much effort in this, why you want so hard to impress Jaehyun when there’s no clear goal in your mind.

You’re late and your heart beats like crazy in your chest when you arrive at the café Jaehyun suggested. It’s a small thing that feels even smaller in the midst of your almost anxiety attack, it smells like coffee and something vanilla. You go cold when he spots you and waves for you to come over to the booth he got, you notice that there’s already two drinks on the table.

Your heart doesn’t calm down when you sit in front of him, or when he smiles at you, but you think you do a good job at hiding it when you mutter a low hello, sitting down in front of him. “I’m really sorry I’m late.”

“Oh, it’s okay! I didn’t wait for long.” He says, smiling bashfully and you feel the weight leave your shoulders a little. “I already ordered us drinks, I hope you like mochas. If not it’s totally okay, I can order something el-.”

“I like mochas, Jaehyun.” You interrupt him, smiling at the way he seems nervous. Almost as much as you are. You take the thought of how adorable he looks with his ears turning pink to the back of your head.

The date goes well, better than your overthinking self let you thought it would be. Jaehyun is nice and the talking go as easily as it did on texting, making your nerves calm down easily. You find out he’s getting a degree on chemistry, his eyes shining when he talks passionately about what he likes about it. He also says he’s a big fan of art too, naming all the mainstream artists and making you fond on how he’s trying to impress you even when he doesn’t have to.

The date goes so well that you accept to go on a second one, to watch a stupid horror movie that’s playing on the cinema near campus. When Jaehyun pretends he’s scared just to hold your hand, you let him. When he kisses you on the back of the empty theater, because according to him the movie is too boring, you let him.

On the third date, to a simple ice cream store, things go so well that he invites you over to his dorm room. You accept, for some reason, and when he presses you against his door the minute he shuts it close, you let him kiss you again.

Maybe this isn’t something you should be doing, but you couldn’t care less. You feel on cloud nine with the way Jaehyun is kissing you, with just the smallest desperation in it, like he’s been waiting a while to do this.

You move your hands to his neck when he deepens the kiss, his own hands holding you by the waist as close as possible to him. The low whine you let out when his tongue finally moves against yours is embarrassing but he doesn’t seem to mind a bit.

It’s nice, so nice that you don’t think much of it when he moves you around, his lips still on yours, until the back of your legs are hitting something hard and then you’re falling down on the softness of his mattress. Oh, your mind smartly provides but you don’t have the time now to overthink, not with Jaehyun kissing you. Now, with his body on top of yours, you get a lot warmer and the pace of the kiss slows down, Jaehyun sucking on your bottom lips and his hand lazily tracing patterns on your exposed hip.

When he breaks the kiss his breath is heavy and lips all swollen, a look that you probably mimic. He smiles at you in a way that’s too sweet for what you are doing, and, out of all things, that makes you blush slightly, smiling back at him. He looks beautiful like this, your mind dazedly provides, and you wish you could keep the image in your brain forever.

Not even a minute passes before he’s moving his head down to press small kisses on your exposed neck, innocent at first and then with more purpose. You shiver when his slight cold hand dips inside the warmth of your sweater, moan a little when he sucks on a spot that’s a little too sensitive, teeth grazing your skin in a way that’s too sinful.

Again, you don’t think much when he hikes your sweater up, letting it bunch just underneath your chest. Or when he presses kisses on your stomach, on the skin just below your belly button. You let your legs rub together, trying to get at least a bit of friction, hoping he won’t notice.

“Can i take these off?” He asks, hand already on the button of your jeans and all you do is dumbly nod. maybe you’re a bit naive, too inexperienced at this. He removes the pants with a little raise from your hips, throwing it gently somewhere in the room. You think what a sight you must be, with your sweater bunched on your chest and pink panties with cherries on it. There’s definitely a blush on your face now.

You try to press your legs together on instinct when he presses a kiss just inside your thigh but he doesn’t let you, hands gripping at them and making you keep them open. He continues doing as he pleases, sucking on the soft skin and biting little marks on your thighs. It isn’t until he moves to remove your panties that your hearts starts beating a little more fast. “W-What are you doing?” You ask dumbly.

“Huh?” He looks up at you, a confused look on his eyes and both lips and ears a cute pink shade. “Gonna eat you out, is that okay?”

“I, what? Why?” You mumble, words getting lost together on how nervous you suddenly are. You didn’t expect jaehyun to eat you out on your third date. Or ever. The mere thought of it making yours cheeks warm. You always thought of it as something too intimate, even too dirty, definitely not something a boy would be offering you so willingly. “You don’t have to, Jaehyun.”

He looks at you like you’re talking nonsense. “I want to.” Is what he simply replies with, thumb playing with the hem of the infamous panties. “Can i?”

You think you’re going to explode from how embarrassed you are. You nod bashfully, taking a deep breath and turning your face to the side so you don’t have to face him when you say the quietest yes ever. You miss the silly smile on his lips but not the way he whispers a little “cute”, making your cheeks heat impossibly more.

He removes your panties then, placing them neatly on the side of the bed before he’s moving between your legs again. Just the proximity of him is enough to have your heart racing with anticipation.

In an almost lovingly way he kisses your clit, making you shift a little. He holds your legs open, fingers drawing soothing patterns on your thigh. You have no time to overthink it because in no time his tongue is licking you in a kitten like way before he let’s his tongue fall flat on your entrance, gathering the wetness there and dragging it up to your clit. He eats you out like he has done this many time before and it turns you into a mess very quickly.

You moan out his name loudly when he sucks on just right, your hands gripping at the sheets. You don’t even feel embarrassed by the noises you’re makings, too overwhelmed by the heat that pools in your lower abdomen.

You feel his hand move against where your is gripping the sheets and for a moment you think he wants to hold hands. But he takes your hand in his and brings it to his head and oh, you finally realize it, he wants you to grip hair. So you do, and the way he hums approvingly sends waves of pleasure all through your body.

You come easily, your whole body shaking and he doesn’t stop his movements until you’re whining from the over stimulation. When he looks up you almost die from the way his lips are shiny and how your wetness smears his chin. It’s sinful and dirty but you still let him kiss you senseless.

You must be feeling brave after your orgasm because you move your arm in between your bodies until you’re palming him through his pants. He breaks the kiss, moaning lowly against your lips and it has to be the hottest thing you have ever experienced in your life. You want to hear it again and again.

You move uncertainty, stroking him over the thick fabric of his jeans and watching as his eyes flutter close. “Baby…” He almost whines. “Please.”

“I-I’ve never done this before.” You mumble, seeking for his eyes and he laughs softly. ”You gotta teach me.”

Your words seem to affect him a bit and he quickly moves to undo his zipper, pushing his pants and boxers down in one swift motions. His shirt goes next.

You don’t remember much from the night jaehyun took your virginity, but you do remember that he had a pretty dick. If such a thing even exists. You keep your eyes on it until he’s back on top of you, lips meeting yours briefly before he’s taking your hand and moving it on top of his on his erection.

He shows you how he likes it, stroking his length in quick motions and when you get the grip of it he lets his hand fall to the sides of your head, supporting himself. It’s mesmerizing the way he groans when you run your thumb on his head, spreading pre come on his length so the slide of your hand is easier. “Faster, baby.” He says, pressing a kiss to the side of your face, and you obligate.

Maybe it’s the confidence the sounds he makes gives you. Or the impulsiveness you’re feeling rushing through your body. But you stop your motions and start moving around until you’re positioned between his legs, your face so close to his dick you are sure he can feel your deep breaths. “I want to try something.” You simply say.

“No, baby. You don’t have to.” He says gently bringing his hand to your cheek, thumb caressing it. You pout.

“But i want to.” Is what you reply with and he doesn’t have the strength to counterpoint that, hand moving to your hair still gently and bringing your face so close to his dick that your lips touch it slightly.

You try to remember what you saw on porn and let spit gather on your mouth before you’re letting in fall on him, hand moving quickly to spread it. “Oh fuck.” His voice is raspy and you’re sure you’re clenching around nothing right now. “You’re so dirty, where did you learn this?”

You just blush, looking at him with a look that will be forever engraved in his mind. He looks at you like he wants to ruin you. You would let him, of course.

You try to get as much of him in your mouth without gagging, which is not much, using your hands on the parts you can’t. It’s probably far from the best head he ever received, you’re too messy and uncoordinated, but he seems to enjoy it. He moans the way you like so much and praises you in ways that make your cheeks heat and your heart flutter. He moves your head when he starts to come, letting it fall on your face and just a bit on your open mouth, the taste making your eyebrows furrow.

He’s sweet after, cleaning your face and still showering you with praise you don’t think you deserve.

You don’t overthink it when he cuddles you and asks you to stay the night. Or when you wake up the next morning and think that you wouldn’t mind waking up to his parted lips and messy hair everyday.

☾

You assume it’s the natural thing to happen, there’s no discussion to it and it makes you feel a bit of anxiety pool in the pit of your stomach. You’re confused and freaking out because maybe you’re not ready for this and maybe you’re not ready. It always scares you when things move too fast and now you’re seeing Jaehyun almost everyday. And when he kisses it’s not as meaningless as it used to be. You feel on the verge of panic.

Taeyong assures you it’s going to be okay, that you can’t have control of things all the time like you want. Sometimes you should let it happen as it goes. So you do that and when Jaehyun kisses you, you kiss him back with as many meaning as you can give it.

Weekend dates turn into nights spent at his dorm, then you’re doing everyday things with him. There’s something strangely comfortably and personal about going grocery shopping with someone while they hold your hand.

After one month of something that it’s quite undefined, Jaehyun introduces you to his friends and calls you his girlfriend in front of all of them. One of them, Johnny smiles and says it’s nice to finally meet the girl Jaehyun talks about for hours non ending. The flowers in your stomach bloom so uncontrollably that the fear of how big this whole thing is for you is forgotten for a moment.

You’re not good with relationships, of any sort. Being alone has taught you a lot of things but how to be with another person is not one of them. You move uncertain, scared of doing the wrong thing and getting hurt. Or the last thing you would want in this world, to hurt Jaehyun.

He’s so patient, asking you all the time if there’s something wrong and holding your hand tightly when you seem nervous about something. He kisses your worries away, not even bothering when you sometimes get a bit distant, take too long to reply. You don’t feel like you deserve any of that.

On the nights you spend alone the feeling of loneliness is not as comfortable as it used to be. It’s like Jaehyun has engraved himself in every part of your life, trying to fit in inside every empty spot you had. When you close your eyes he’s right there behind your eyelids and his perfume is everywhere. You let yourself melt into it.

You don’t know if it’s normal to feel like this, the only other romantic experience being a puppy love years ago. You wonder if the thoughts of Jaehyun that roam your mind and warm your heart are normal, wonder if you’re supposed to feel butterflies in your stomach everytime you see him even after months of dating. For a minute you let yourself think that maybe, if soulmates were real, then Jaehyun was yours. Something meant to happen, that’s how you feel when he looks at you.

You hope he feels the same way. There’s no way your heart can take it if he doesn’t.

☾

On one normal saturday morning, when you and Jaehyun are out buying groceries, he asks you to dye his hair for him.

He has stopped in the beauty aisle, eyeing all the products, examining the different boxes and colors, when he throws the proposition at you. “You’re an artist.” he reasons, when you look at him like he’s crazy. “So that makes you the only person I trust to do this.”

You sigh, standing in your tip toes so you can look at the products too over his shoulders. “I’m not a hair artist.” You mutter. “What if I fuck your hair up and you end up bald?”

He finally decides on the brand he thinks is more trustable, throwing the box in the small shopping cart. “I wouldn’t mind being bald that much.” There’s a playful smile on his lips when he turns to look at you and it makes you snort. “Would you?”

“Would I mind you being bald? Yeah, probably.” He has the nerve to pout, arms pulling you closer in a hug. Deciding to entertain him you press a quick peck to his lips, blushing when notice there’s an old lady just walking in the aisle you are.

He notices you embarrassament, not letting you get out from his embrace when you try to and moving his face close to yours in attempts to kiss you again. The lady looks like she finds the scene adorable. “Maybe I’ll make you bald on purpose.” You bite at him and that just makes him laugh out loud.

Later Jaehyun sits patiently on a chair in the middle of your tiny dorm room, rolling through his instagram as you apply the bleaching powder on his hair. The smell is awful even with the bit of your window open. “Does it burn?” You ask him. “I read somewhere online it’s supposed to.”

“A little, yeah.” He replies, looking up at you and throwing a cute smile. You show him your tongue. “But it’s not like, unbearable. Don’t worry, baby.”

You hum, examining his hair to see if you didn’t miss any parts. You’re sure he’s trying to show you a brave façade because there’s no way something this white and smelling this bad is not burning his scalp to hell. “Now we only gotta wait like 20 minutes, I think.” It’s late afternoon now, you notice when you check your phone after removing the protective gloves and throwing it in the ground.

“If we finish before it gets dark we could go get ice cream.” He suggests, making you nod enthusiastically. Your weekends usually went like this, going out to eat something together, sometimes watching a movie and then coming back to either of your dorms. You liked it.

While you wait for the minutes to pass you decide to put on music to play, something from an r&b playlist that Jaehyun likes, and you smile when he sings along. He shows you random videos on his phone every now and then but besides that it’s just comfortable silence or talking about how your week went. He pretends to understand when you go on about a new painting technique and you pretend to understand when he talks about the experiment he did on class.

Your alarm goes off, signalling that the 20 minutes have passed. “Do you think it’s done already?” Jaehyun uses the small mirror on your wall to examine the hair, it’s considerably more light and it doesn’t seem to be falling off.

“Yeah. It doesn’t have to be like, stark white.” You grab a towel from you drawer, moving to your bathroom with Jaehyun following behind.

Washing his hair in the sink proves to be a difficult job, even more because your bathroom was definitely not made to fit more than one person inside. But you make do, with water splashing everywhere because he keeps giggling and moving around too much. When all the bleaching is removed Jaehyun stares at you with very blonde hair that for some weird reason looks really good on him. “Maybe I should just keep it like this.” He says, bending his knees down just a little so you can reach his head to dry it.

“It wouldn’t be that bad.” You reply, admiring how cute he looks with his hair sticking up everywhere. “But the hair dye was too expensive.”

He hums, moving back to normal now that you’ve finished drying his hair. He circles his arms around your waist and keeps staring at you for longer than necessary. “What?” You hit his chest playfully, feeling shy from his stare.

“You’re just too pretty, is all.” His words make your cheeks heat up. It’s like he has the special power of always turning you into an embarrassed mess with just a few words. “And I love you.”

The butterflies in your stomach go wild, your chest feeling like there’s no space for breathing. It’s almost painful and you could cry, but you don’t. It’s the first time he has ever said it out loud like this, and so sincere. You had figured, of course, by the way he looks at you and how he makes love to you oh, so gently.

The only reply you can give him is the press of your lips to his, sweet and slow, and it seems to do. He sighs into the kiss, trying to deepen it but you don’t let him, breaking it and smiling at the way his eyes have stars on it. “Come on, we have to dye your hair pink.”

It takes another hour for you to get the dye on every part of Jaehyun hair, getting distracted here and there because he keeps cracking stupid jokes and trying to convince you to dye yours green so you two could be like Cosmo and Wanda. Afterwards, when you stare at Jaehyun in all his glory with the pastel pink hair you feel your heart swoons. It suits him perfectly, like the color pink was invented for him and no one else. The way he blushes when you tell him just how pretty he looks just makes the whole thing better.

You finish just in time to watch the sunset as you two make your way to the small and cozy ice cream shop down the street. You feel content with Jaehyun’s hand in yours, even if the way your coat matches his hair makes people that pass by you stare weirdly.

“Here you go, baby.” He says, handing you your ice cream and sitting down at the table you got inside of the store. “Cookies and dark chocolate, your favorite.”

You thank him, a smile on your face. It’s such a small thing, to remember someone’s favorite ice cream flavors, but it makes your heart jump happily in your chest. You watch as he takes a spoonful of his own choice, pistachio and vanilla, and it dawns on you that you love him. You had thought about it before, of course, but right now you’re so filled with infatuation for the man before you that you would like to scream to him the words that he said earlier.

He gets you out of your little daze by moving to wipe your hand with a napkin. “Stop staring at me, your ice cream is melting.” He scolds but with no harshness to his voice. “You’re like a little baby I have to take care of.”

You show him your tongue playfully. “Still, you love me.” Your next words are impulsive, something unlike you in many ways, but they just fall out your lips like they can’t be unsaid anymore. “And… I love you too.”

He smiles, lips slightly smeared with ice cream and leans in on the table to kiss you, almost getting ice cream all over his sweater. His lips taste like pistachio and it’s perfect.

Later when you two are walking back to his dorm you ask him if he believes in souls.

He looks at you a little confused. “Maybe?” Is his reply. “I don’t know, why?”

You swing your connected hands a little, pondering on how you should say what you want to, not wanting him to think you’re weird or delusional. “Because I have this feeling that… well, that our souls are somehow connected?” You say stumbling a little over your words, voice uncertain. “Like maybe we were supposed to meet, you know?”

He smiles like he finds the whole thing amusing. “Are you trying to say we are soulmates?”

You blush, nodding and he stops midway, making you stop too. “You’re probably right.” Is the only thing he says before spinning you in his arms and kissing you lovingly. You can’t hide the smile that spreads on your face.

☾

Jaehyun is always gentle, even when he doesn’t have to be.

You two had a nice date, something fancy for once at an italian restaurant that opened recently. By the end of the night you’re tipsy from the wine you shared and a little too touchy towards him.

You think the lingerie with shyly put on for him would stir something, make him lose control but it’s the same as always. He eats you out, like it’s his favorite thing in the world, and after he has made you come he enters you with a little moan coming from his mouth. He fucks you slowly and with care, vanilla almost. And you love it, you do, the way he bites your neck a little as he thrusts into you in a pace that drives you crazy. But you want more, want him to fuck you like he’s desperate and crazy for it. Wants him to hurt you in ways that make your eyes roll.

“Jae, please” You whine against his mouth. You don’t want to feel delicate, don’t want to feel like this means something to him. You want him to fuck you so fast that you forget that you feel something, you want numbness and complete bliss.You want to forget the way your heart blooms in your chest when he looks at you like he is right now. “Y-You can fuck me harder.”

He makes a little sounds that it’s half a groan and half a confused noise. “Yeah?” He asks like he wants to be sure and when you nod he presses his lips to your in a bruising kiss. He thrusts one more time slowly and then he’s picking up the pace, fucking into you fast and deep like you had wanted so many times.

It makes you scream, hands grabbing at his shoulders with the same force he’s gripping at your thighs. “Yes, yes.” He seems just as affected, grunting and groaning just beside your ears. “Want you to ruin me.”

It does something to him, his hips snapping with as much force as possible and he moans so pretty you clench around him. “You’re going to fucking kill me, baby.” He whispers, thumb coming to your lower lips and you let your mouth fall open, letting him press it flat on your tongue and you suck it like you’re trying to put on a show for him. “You’re so dirty for me, aren’t you? You look like an angel but you’ll let me fuck you like this.”

You never thought he could say things like this. Your eyes flutter close and all you can do is nod, lips still around his finger as he fucks you so deep you’re seeing stars.

It’s very easy to fall into a delirious headspace, with the way Jaehyun is doing exactly what you asked him to. It’s exciting to see him lose control like this. “You like it, baby?” He asks, removing his finger from your mouth so you can finally speak. “Hmm? Like being fucked like this?”

Just then he thrusts in a spot that has you clenching around him and throwing your head back in the pillow. “Y-Yes, please.” You moan desperately, feeling your orgasm closer with each of his thrusts. “I’m so close, oh my god.”

You can feel the sweet relief in the pit of your stomach and when Jaehyun presses his thumb on your clit, circling in pace with his thrusts, you explode. It’s heaven and heat thrumming to your veins as you clench so hard around him that his hips stutter and he grips your thighs harder.

“Fuck, fuck.” He curses, closing his eyes as you ride the last waves of your orgasm. “I’m gonna fill you up so well, Baby, you want that?”

You can even reply properly, giving him a weak nod and clenching around him again so he’s moaning your name loudly, hips stuttering as he comes inside of you.

Afterwards he’s back to he’s delicate self, treating you with so much care that’s it’s like he feels he has tainted something precious. He cleans the come that starts to drip off you and you tell him how much you liked the whole thing. His ears turn red when he says he liked it as well.

☾

You don’t like parties, never had. too loud and too many people but Jaehyun seems to love all that.

Every friday he tried his best to convince you to attend one of his friend’s get together, telling you how fun it would be and that he would be by your side the whole time. You say yes, more because of the second reason than the first one.

The party it’s not that bad, not at all. There’s not too many people and Jaehyun’s friends are nice, so nice that you even dance a little with some of them. After many and many shots of the red liquid they keep giving you, it’s sweet enough that you don’t think much when you down all of them.

Once upon a time, on your first ever college party, Taeyong had introduced you to a thing called pure vodka. You were never much of a drinker before so you don’t know exactly why you get so carried on with it, ignoring the burning on your throat as you down shot after shot.

Knowing you would drink that night you had decided to not take your anxiety medication, mistake number two. It all happened very slowly, like in a movie almost. You began getting tipsy and too happy, dragging Taeyong around and laughing with him. Next thing you knew your heart felt like it was trying to escape your chest with how fast it started beating. It was the worst panic attack you ever had, crying you little heart out because no one knew how to help you. You don’t remember how the night ended.

You should’ve remembered that occurrence as you take your fifth shot,Jaehyun keeping you close with a hand around your waist. “Slow down, baby.” He says, moving your hair out of your face.

You kiss him once, twice and then you’re giggling stupidly. He seems amused by it all. “I’m okay, Jaejae.” He laughs at the silly nickname.

You have a good time, you really do. Dancing with Jaehyun and laughing with his friends until you feel the tightness on your chest. Like you had suddenly gotten the soul sucked out of your body, you feel an emptiness that you’re too familiar with. Your eyes start welling up as the world around you spins and spins. Jaehyun is beside you, talking excitedly to one of his friends and you grip tightly at his shirt. You really don’t want to bother him, not when he seems to be so happy, but you feel it getting worse and worse and the panic settling in the pit of your heart.

“Jaehyun, can you please take me home?” You say quietly so no one else will hear it. The knot in your stomach keeps getting tighter and the last thing you want is to cry in front of a whole party.

His face changes immediately, worry all over his features and he searches your eyes for any signs. “Why? What’s wrong, baby?”

You just whine, childish and pathetic. “Please, can we just go?” You wish with all your body that you weren’t doing this right now, ruining his night like this.

He just nods, guiding you outside the party and into his car. It doesn’t take long for the tears to come, Jaehyun glancing at you every few seconds and it just makes you cry even more. “Baby, you gotta tell me what’s wrong.” He coos, hand coming to massage your thigh in a soothing way. You just shake your head, lowering it so you hair hides your face from his view. “Did something happen?” His voice is filled with worry.

You shake your head again, feeling the dizziness from the alcohol when you do.

When you get to his dorm you immediately try to move to his bed, want to hide there forever and feel safe in the warmth of it, but he doesn’t let you. He wraps you in his arms, hand stroking your hair and it only makes you cry more, hiding your face in his chest and probably getting his shirt all dirty. “Come on, baby.” He whispers as if to not disturb you. “After we clean you up you can lay down.”

He takes you to the bathroom, turning on the shower on a hot temperature and then starts undressing you with all the patient in this world. It’s not weird and he doesn’t seem bothered to be nursing you like you can’t possibly take care of yourself. You probably look a mess, makeup smeared and face swollen from all the crying. The world around you still spins a little.

You whine when the water hits your body and Jaehyun only sushes you, removing his smeared t-shirt so he can get inside the box with you. You fall putty in his arms as he tries his best to wash you, massaging your hair with care. You feel awful for doing this to him, when you don’t deserve half of it. You don’t deserve the way he cares for you or how treats you with such delicacy. You just ruined his whole night. “I’m… I’m so sorry.” You mumble incoherently, tears forming in your eyes again.

“No, no, baby. Don’t cry.” He says but it’s useless, the tears are already mixing with the water as they fall down your cheeks. “Tell me what’s wrong, please.”

You start talking about how you’re a mess and awful, that you doesn’t deserve him and how you’re going to ruin his life because that’s what you do with everything around your life. Your words are slurred and you can’t stop crying anymore, weeping sounds coming out of your mouth and Jaehyun just holds you like the perfect man he is. “Shh, ___.” His hand rubs your back soothingly, getting himself all wet but he couldn't care less. “You’re none of these things and you’re not going to ruin anything.”

“I am!” You want to argue but he doesn’t let you, just hugs you tighter and whispers calming words until you stop moving around.

Afterwards, when he dries you both up and puts you on comfortable clothes, he takes you to bed and cuddles you. “I love you, ___. There’s nothing wrong with you.” He says and if you weren’t too numb now you would cry again. Your head starts to ache and you can feel yourself drifting off asleep.

☾

Things go downhill from there.

You get as distant as possible from everyone around you and there are days that you wake up and not a single part of your body wants to be alive. You skip class and don’t even mind when Taeyong sends angry texts scolding you.

You spend your days sleeping and painting, making good use of the strange inspiration you get whenever you have bad days. You’re used to this, have experienced it many times before, and that’s probably a bad sign. But even if it’s normal you’re still not the best at dealing with with, acting like it’s the end of the world whenever it gets bad.

Jaehyun texts you and you try to your best to reply and make up excuses to why he can’t come see you. He probably knows something is wrong but you don’t want to tell him that some days you wake up and you don’t find the strength to even wash your own hair. Don’t want to tell you that sometimes you close your eyes and think that the world would probably be better off without you. You don’t wanna upset him, not more than you already are.

Taeyong visits on a rainy day, almost slamming your door with how much he knocks. He looks angry when you open the door but his eyes often as he sees you, hair messy and wearing a hoodie that has too many paint splashes. You’re not feeling as empty as the start of the week, your heart warming up when you see him.

He hugs you for a good minute, before he’s looking at you with a furrow between his brows. “Let’s wash this hair, okay?” He says and you can’t help but smile a little.

You let him wash your hair in your tiny shower while you’re only on your underwear. It’s not weird or uncomfortable, never is with Taeyong. He massages your scalp while he tells you what you missed from class, you don’t pay so much attention to the artist names but his voice feels comfortable.

“Jaehyun has been asking about you like crazy.” He says with care when he’s drying your hair afterwards. You feel a pang of guilty in your chest and your eyes get glossy from unshed tears. “He’s very worried.”

“I have texted him that I was not feeling very well.” You say, voice small and Taeyong just tsks.

“You can’t just text your boyfriend that and expect him to not be worried sick about you.”

You bite your lips, your thoughts going a mess and you just want to hide in the safety of your bed again. “Maybe I should just break up with him.” You say, heart heavy in your chest. That’s not what you want. Taeyong knows that and he raises one eyebrow. As much as you try to pretend you would be okay if it happened, leaving Jaehyun would destroy you completely.

“You keep acting like you’re not worthy things as simple as a boys attention. You didn’t force Jaehyun into your life, he’s into it because he wants to, because he loves you.” Taeyong says and each words stabs a wound deeper in your chest. “You got so comfortable being lonely that you can get your head around the fact you don’t have to be alone for the rest of your life.”

You don’t notice that you start crying, never dealing too well with the truth being told directly to your face. Everyone was always so hesitant around you, being extra careful with their words as if to not hurt you. Taeyong doesn’t care about that, he tells you things how they are and he will gladly hurt your feelings if it means it’ll snap you out of whatever daze you got yourself in.

“One day you will wake up feeling miserable because you let a good thing go. Jaehyun knows you’re not perfect, he has seen you in some pretty fucked up days and he decided to stay. Give up control for once and let him decide if you’re not good for him like you think so.”

When he leaves you lay down and think of Jaehyun. Simply, you think of him, without you. You think of how his ears turn red when gets shy, how his dimples get so deep when he smiles. You think of how happy he got on his birthday because of the surprise party you threw for him with his friends. You think about the look in his eyes whenever he’s talking about or doing something he’s passionate about. You think about the time you both saw an abandoned kitten at the street and he almost cried because he couldn’t take it home.

Then you think about him with you. How he will go out of his way when you’re on your period and craving something sweet. How he looks at you like you put the stars in the sky and how he kisses you with so much care that it makes you feel like floating. You think of the time he spent hours in the phone with your mom talking about her flowers like he knew or cared a lot about the subject, just because he wanted to impress her. Of the times he’ll watch you paint in silence just because, in his words, it’s so mesmerizing. Think of every time he has made you feel special and every little thing he does everyday to show you he loves you, the little emojis and texts, the random kisses. Everything.

You try to think of living a life where Jaehyun is not by your side and when you do your heart feels like it shatters. You could live without him of course, but the thing is, you don’t want to.

You get up suddenly, changing as quickly as possible as walking until you’re on Jaehyun’s dorm front door. It’s a little stupid because you don’t even know if he’s home right now and you stand there, your heart beating a little fast after you knock.

“Hi.” Is what you smartly says and he smiles sadly at you. “Can I come inside?”

He steps outside and lets you in, there’s a few books opened on his bed and you realize that you probably just disturbed his studying. “I’m sorry, were you busy?”

He shakes his head, pushing the books aside and sitting on his bed, patting the empty spot beside him so you’ll sit too. You bask in the warmth of being close to him. “Not really.” Is all he says.

You hum, eyeing him and feeling your heartbeat go a little faster. You hate talking about your feelings, can feel your cheeks heat up from just the thought of it and you really hope you don’t end up crying in front of Jaehyun again.” I just came to apologize for isolating myself and not giving you an explanation.” You murmur eyes not meeting his. “And I know i’ve said that I don’t think I deserve you, and I really don’t, but I want you. So bad it scares me.”

When he doesn’t reply right away you start saying that you would completely understand if he wanted to breakup, your heart breaking a little, until he starts laughing. When you look up he’s staring at you like you’re crazy but there’s still fondness in his eyes. “You’re so silly. You really think I would want to breakup?” He grabs you by the arm and pulls you into a hug that almost suffocates you. Still, you let yourself fall into his arm and enjoy the feeling of being safe. “I love you so much, but you can’t just disappear and not tell me what’s going on. Do you know how many Frank Ocean songs I listened to while thinking of you?”

You scoff, hiding deeper into his chest and loving the way it vibrates when he laughs. “I’m really sorry.” Your words are muffled by his sweater.

“It’s okay, baby.” He pats your head sweetly. “But you need to realize that I don’t care that you are a little messed up, I am too. And I’m here when you feel like life is not going very well. I want to be here and take care of you.”

You look up to his face, examining the slight stubble that’s forming on his chin. “Are you sure? I can be a lot to deal with.”

He smiles, with his dimples showing. “I’m aware, and I think I can handle it.”

When he kisses you it’s like a weight leaves your shoulders. You’ll embrace loneliness when it decides to come again but for now you let Jaehyun fill the empty spaces like he was made just for it.

#jaehyun scenarios #jaehyun smut #nct smut #nct scenario #nct scenarios #neowritingsnet #another big fic lmao in less than a week #but i wanted to post this quickly since im probably not gonna post much for now #gotta focus on my thesis #but yeahh hope this is good

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